Sebastian Maniscalco

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See terms at discover.com slash credit card. looking good i you know we have guests you do this you i was shocked that you guys you and pete have done 628 episodes just the fortitude is that true that's what it said episode 628 yeah haven't uh haven't made a dime it's coming our guys tell us it's coming right around the corner just got patience man i mean you know you got into this for money no listen i actually didn't and we just started doing basically a phone call uh he's lives in fredonia i live in los angeles we're like you know what we have such a great time talking to one another let's just record it and we'll put it out there as a podcast and we we did it once a week for now going on 12 years and uh you know we we just have fun doing it it's not it's not wait a minute do you do you read ads do you read ads yeah yeah you ads and still make it nothing.
I mean, we got, you got Masterclass. You got, what do you got? You got- Zoc-Doc.
You guys got Zoc-Doc? Hell yeah. Hell yeah.
We dated for a while and we broke up. No, we got- We had a, we sort of just, they ghosted us.
Right? Blue Nile is our biggest one. Yeah, Blue Nile is good.
That's a big one. Diamonds.
Yeah. So you got the original wife.
Original wife, meaning pre. I never even heard of this situation.
My wife's so attractive that people thought she'd be the second wife after I got some fame and money. I go, no, original wife.
Like, oh, okay. But you had done one special, but you weren't Sebastian at that point, right? You met 2009.
Yeah. We went in 2009.
I was just coming off, actually, yeah, I was just coming off a special two years earlier. And then, yeah, just, you know, knocking around comedy comedy clubs she would come with me uh addison beltline road and improv and you know it was uh we kind of came up together in the comedy world uh obviously i was doing comedy prior to meeting her but like you know when i started making a living doing it she was kind of right there with me.
Let me ask you this.

This is usually the evolution of a girlfriend who might become a wife.

But, okay, early on, she's up close.

Maybe not the first row, but right up there.

A little few weeks later, she's heard a lot.

She's in the middle of the crowd kind of hanging out.

Then she's sort of standing in the back.

Eventually, she's in the dressing room for Moses' show and asking you how how it went and then she stops coming that's everyone i know that's every single they're really excited then they see how the rabbit gets out of the hat yeah they're going oh i see all these but anyway no you're right it's just it's a basic evolution out of the building uh yeah call me after after. What about, did you say Addison Improv? Is that Dallas? Yeah, that's Dallas.
And it's right by a freeway. Is that what you're talking about? Yeah, it's right.
It's the most populated restaurants per square mile, I think, in the country on Beltline Road in Dallas. I played the old Dallas Improv that was on Central and Walnut.
And then they opened Addison. That's how old I am.
And then I started playing that one. Okay, wait a minute.
Dana, go ahead. Spellbinders in Houston, anyone? Bill Hicks was my dandy little opener.
No way. I was temperamental in those days.
I got a hold of his collar and said,

you ain't going nowhere, kid.

Oh, good.

I lost it.

No, he was brilliant.

Brilliant then all to the way.

So there's another stat of yours.

I just have to ask you

because it's extraordinary

from where you are now.

The math that I did on your Wikipedia page

says you were still waitering

potentially at age 32. Yeah.
Okay. That's extraordinary.
I was waiting tables. Yeah.
Around 31, I quit the four seasons hotel right here in Beverly Hills. So I was there for seven years in the windows lounge delivering chicken satays to every celebrity in town.
Oh, I love it. I, uh, I would do comedy during my break i would run to the to comedy store do a set and back pick up my table so yeah i i was uh early 30s schlepping drinks don't you think i mean you know when you make it and then you went on and then you you're at this apex i mean it's extraordinary well-deserved too so you don't you think it's better to make it later i mean are you still apex.
I mean, it's extraordinary. Well-deserved, too.

So don't you think it's better to make it later?

I mean, are you still kind of used to it?

It's only been about 12 years since you went supernova, I guess.

In the context of your life, it's still kind of new in a way?

Or are you kind of acclimatized to the numbers?

What arena?

How big is the arena? It's arena size. Come on, Sebastian, go ahead.
No, you know, I, I'm glad it kind of all happened the way it happened. I just, you know, I had a slow burn, you know, I didn't get a TV show or a movie or anything like that, that kind of catapulted me into standup comedy in a way where I could draw a crowd.
So I just did it, you know, kind of slow burn. And yeah, I mean, listen, I grew up in a working class, middle class family.
And, you know, we've always kind of had to work. You know, my dad always says the Maniscalco family, nothing comes easy.
We always got to kind of be patient, put our time in. Did he actually say the Maniscalco? Because I can't imagine my dad saying the coffees will always.
I mean, that's just very Italian or Sicilian or something, right? Yeah, it's very Sicilian. Like we always got to, you know, wait our turn, basically.
No one bumps us to the head of the line. I still have that type of career, too, though.
I mean, I have a fan base, obviously. They come and see me.
But for example, I went to the Bulls game in my hometown of Chicago last week. Simone Biles sitting there with her husband, Jonathan Owens.
And they put you up on the jumbotron. So they tell me we're putting Simone Biles up, right? She goes up there.
You would have thought Michael Jordan walked in. Oh, my God.
You got to follow her. And then me, who I just I'm doing two sellout shows that the Friday and Saturday right after that, I didn't even know they announced my name.
It was almost as if a guy came out to shoot free throws during that's the response I got in my hometown.

So it's like,

I'm still like just on the fringe of like quote unquote celebrity or fame.

Yeah.

You know,

there's fun things.

There's,

there's interesting facts that like Dana has probably been more famous in his life than he hasn't been. So that's probably a weird feeling because you always remember more that you weren't.
But he's had such a run. And then Artie Lang, who I think you guys all know, Artie Lang told me the weirdest he felt was when he made more than his dad.
It was such a weird feeling for him that what he does, which is so feeling so trivial. And then he goes, wow, my dad's such a fucking hard worker.
And he goes, I honestly had to go to therapy. I didn't know how to deal with that.
Isn't that crazy? But I get it. My dad was a high school teacher.
So Sebastian, your dad, was he somebody making six figures or 50K? Yeah, he owned hair salons, so he was a hairdresser, but never had a franchise of hair salons, just a few throughout his career. Not making a fantastic living, but we went on one vacation.
We had two cars. We lived in a nice home that never struggled for money, but yeah, I think it is kind of weird to get used to.
I never really even thought about making more than my father. That never really even crossed my mind as far as like, it's never been like you're making more money.
The relationship such as like that that he's the star right

sure and and i'm i'm hanging on to his coat that's all but also i grew up not knowing you know my dad was kind of in and out of my life but never even knew how much anybody made it didn't even cross your mind you just you know you had a place to live hopefully and some food and it but i didn't know numbers i didn't know who knew yeah you know so you just that's your dad and he's the main guy in your life because he's your dad but it's a weird feeling to get i mean i there's times i feel obviously overpaid for things and you go just a weird feeling you never get used to it i don't care i mean because i had the same kind of thing five kids high school high school. You know, two day old baked goods.
Not one day, but two day. My mom would go Old County Road.
Never had a new car, but we were super happy, man. We got a colored TV in 1965.
We had an antenna. We couldn't really see anything, but it was colorful.
A antenna. But I think I asked my wife, and I don't know who you would ask, but I always,

once in a while I'll ask her in 1979,

when I met her,

I was in college just trying to do open mics.

Robin Williams was creeping around,

making everyone feel like,

why am I even doing this?

And I said,

did I ever say I wanted to be rich and famous ever?

Nope.

That was never the goal.

It was to become an,

a middle act.

Me too. And then to become a headliner i was just middle so yeah david yeah go ahead speak to that yeah i don't think that i don't think the the people that have talent and and are in this just for the sheer joy of making people laugh are ever looking for fame and fortune in in way.
I mean, obviously there's some outliers, but in a day and age now where everybody wants to be famous for, I don't know what, I mean, I feel like we're kind of like the last of the Mohicans in the sense of we actually had to work going to the club, working on the act, the timing, the nuance, the heckling or whatever it is. But now apparently you turned your camera on and you eat a meatball and you'd say, you tell people how good it is.
And all of a sudden, you know, you're, you're just as famous as the guy. That's so demoralizing for the young people, because I talked to some talent managers a while back and I asked them, does talent matter? And they said, no, no.
They think in a long career it does, but no, no, no, no. There's a kid who opens, he's handsome, he opens up jars of pickles.
He does seven figures. So what do you do with that? The impressing, if your kid goes, oh my God, the guy that drinks pickle juice follows you.
That's like the biggest victory of your life. You're like, oh.
Everyone was good when I grew up. Don Rickles was good.
Carson was good. Frank Sinatra.
I mean, all great. But yeah, that's so distortive.
So I don't want to go to my discussion. Go ahead.
One second. Since you've been around entertainment for quite some time, have you guys ever run across a Sinatra? Do you have like a Sinatra story? Did he ever come in? I have a weird one.
It's a little dark, but so it's night. This is a cigar metaphor.
No, you're not going to see what's coming. So it's 1998.
I'm getting a stent in my artery at Cedar Sinai, which, you know, it happens. I'm fine.
Don't worry. So I'm there.
I'm just in the, you know, I'm on the ward in my room, reading a magazine and there's this hubbub and, uh, Hey, what's going on out there? He goes, Sinatra just checked in, you know, and, uh, they put them in the room next to me and so I was just listening I heard under my breath no he didn't win but anyway he passed away that night uh it was May 8th or 10th 1998 not in my arms but yeah in my arms did you go in there and cuddle him uh I wanted to man I became an hyper fan at age 40. Before that, I didn't get it.
And then when I got it, I really got it. But I did ask the cardiologist there, world class.
I go, what was Frank Sinatra like as a patient? And they were Indian. They're still friends of mine.
They go, oh, it was very tough because you'd give them the thing to blow in and see what your lungs are hey get back doc and get i'm gonna blow this further than anybody's ever blown these bubbles in their fucking life you know so i don't know do you have a snob story david are you sebastian that's mine no no i never i never ran across them was your dad a super fan because italian so. No, I mean, we listened to him, but it wasn't like, you know, we didn't have a picture of him on the wall at the house.
He was, you know, played on Saturday mornings while I was doing vacuuming. I remember I had to do chores on Saturday.
My mother would play him around the house. uh yeah i don't know i just find them fascinating like i just i don't know like the the old school type of old school yeah it's fun well the rat pack at the sands the live album is is magical you know and john lovitz told me john lovitz plays it in before he goes on every night when he does clubs.
He plays that to get that vibe of Sinatra and Dean Martin and that that the coolness of that. But can I ask you a question? Because I'm just sort of curious just to put a picture on your childhood, you know, working class.
How many siblings did you have? I have a sister younger, about five years. And so what were I like asking people these questions, TV show or movie that floated your boat as you know, in the formative years, eight, 10, 11, 12 toy or bicycle you had that you'll never forget or musical act that you blew your mind coming up.
You have five seconds. It was Three's Company.

Three's Company.

John Ritter is magic.

Did you ever meet John Ritter?

I've never met John Ritter, but heavily influenced by my physical comedy with John Ritter.

A bike or did you say a toy?

Toy.

He-Man.

I grew up in the He-Man era. Not Stretch Armstrong? He-Man was a big He-Man doll.
I used to play football with my He-Man dolls. We might have gone too far.
He-Man for five yards. And then an entertainer would be Michael Jackson.
Growing up was my vibe. Can I tell you my Michael Jackson story? Is it the Holiday Inn? Yeah, I worked at the Holiday Inn and I was a busboy waiter and the Jackson 5 came in and I would go and, and wait on them.

You know, there was Tito and Marlon.

And I went in Michael's room before the show,

he ordered raw carrots and Janet,

I believe as a little girl was jumping up and down on the bed and he would sit

and look at the mirror in the room.

I give him the raw carrots and I felt bad later on.

Cause I know I said, you're a good looking kid,

but you can maybe do a little something.

And I just backed off and left.

Dana, that set off a whole thing with him.

I know, but I did wait on,

because we were near the Circle Star Theater

up in the Bay Area.

It was a 3000 in the round.

So I waited on Richard Pryor, George Carlin, Rich Little.

I did room service to Little Richard. He answers the door completely naked.
Anyway, that's that part. That's another podcast.
Can I ask you a little bit about your process? Yeah. Because once in a while, I'd sit down on Netflix and I'd watch specials.
Okay.

And I usually last 15 minutes.

With David, like I said, I last about 15 minutes.

David, I go longer.

But so I'm going through.

I didn't know a thing about you.

Never saw you.

And it was the one with the Subway sandwich in the Cinnabon.

And I watched it all the way through. And said holy shit this is new this is familiar but completely brand new it kind of i used to have gotten this from people over the years right when they first because the physicality and the musicality together was so potent to me and the physicality is it's not just.
It's also just send a bomb into your head. I mean, it's like, and then the rhythms, you know, the way you say people, people, people, you're so exasperated.
The guy's over by the pool clip in his toenails. I mean, it's so hypnotic and i love it and i recommended that special and others to our business manager loves you and two things one so then i went i said i showed you to my kids i said oh this guy you know sebastian then i said let's find out where he was so i watched you on craig fer Craig Ferguson doing stand-up and it was all there but it wasn't 2.0 it wasn't extrapolated but everything was there so the confidence leap was huge so you have people tell you this right I mean it's it's so potent no one else is doing that even to this day your style I just I just really appreciate it and do you pull muscles do you get hurt on stage because jim brewer does okay that's all i gotta say no i was very very sweet of you i appreciate the cut i like the way you put it uh describing kind of what happens uh up there um physicality and musicality, I never really heard it put that way.
But yeah, for me, as far as I did comedy so much, just to just to get good at it and familiar and, you know, talk about the confidence, you know, I noticed when I started moving a lot, people like enjoyed that. And was a bit of a surprise because maybe you wouldn't suspect it coming from a guy like i was just kind of up there i was kind of dressed nice and then i would do a whatever and then i'm like oh wow i'm getting some response here with the movement and then i guess what happens in stand-up comedy you just become uh you try to get as comfortable as you are just talking like with your family so that's kind of how I equated it too because they would look at me on stage and go you're much funny when you talk to us you know and well and I was like well you know I gotta get used to this it's something that's it's very new to me and uh and yeah for me it's just basically storytelling and the act outs are, are kind of, um,

just they're, they're not practiced it's just like i'm gonna go to the comic store tonight and i'm gonna tell a story that happened to me and how i tell the story happens to come with a a head bob or just being shocked the one i i don't know which special it was but people just randomly ringing the doorbell the act out on that was just huge i mean you're going in different rooms lying down it was like a whole military operation so i call it funny with the sound off and there's nothing more potent than if you look at i love lucy or peter sellers where there's first of all there not one joke in your act verbally, but also that the act outs allow the audience to laugh crazy hard because they're not, they don't have to listen right at that moment. So then they're free.
And so I just, it's a style that I just love. I think it's kind of a style that when I saw it at the store, I think I first saw it, uh, Sebastian, just leaving, you know, you do a set and you set you're leaving and I go he was next so I just sat in the back or I just walked in one night and before I went on just who's on I don't know everybody here and uh same thing Dana I just thought it was very different and I think it's kind of like maybe you're saying his stand-up in the old days was sort of uh in a weird way, acapella.
And now you're adding strings and different things to it because movements and different things are taking like a bit that's funny and it's getting funnier. There's little layers to it now.
So you have a bit that's already funny and now you're putting different stuff to it. Now it's elevating and now that's your whole style.
There's more going on in each bit than a regular stand-up i would say that's what i i i'd drawn to the same stuff it was already funny and then he surprises with some moves i think i think it was the uber bit and there was one about about that was just funny to me and then and then when i see i see you know it got into this other thing that we can get into where I just did a special, and this is more what this podcast is about. I did a special.
And what's the name of it? When does it come out? We don't know yet. Okay.
But the thing about it is, and Sebastian's done a lot of these, and the idea of do you start from scratch and do a whole new hour or do you do a mixed bag? So for me, I just shot my special last week and I'm still on tour. So that will come out after I, after I'm done with the tour.
So I'd like to give the crowd a new experience if I'm going to go on tour again. I mean, I think there's some, some material that people enjoy that they want to hear.
Right. And I might throw a few of the older ones in, but I like to, you know, I don't know.
It's hard with comedians. I mean, I'm sure you guys run into it, the impressions that you do.
People want to see the impressions or people want to see the. Totally.
Yeah. Yeah.
You're like, all right, you know, I'll give you that. But like the hits, here's what, what do you got? Where's the bride's groomsmen or whatever, that one, where they come down and rehearse that one.
I always thought was funny because when I see you, sometimes I go, Oh, I don't know what's coming out. You know? And I, if I told my buddy, Oh, there's an Uber bit, there's this bit.
So those kind of things happen with me too. They go, oh, I came to see you and you didn't do.
And I'm like, I know. I actually like to mix in some of my favorites and then, of course, do new stuff.
And then there's that feeling of that was in the special. Do I do it when I go out again? I don't know.
It's back's it's back and well here you guys uh a little bit older than me you you didn't have like you when you did when you did something on tv or you did that just lived on tv it's not like you went and go and like pulled that clip back up again of uh the snl sketch that you guys did it's like if you missed it you missed it yeah pretty much and now it's all out there for everybody to see so you do a special and it's like i didn't even i didn't have cable going up so i didn't even see the damn hbo specials and and and and when i it was like catching a unicorn but now it's like you do you do a special they cut it up it's all on clips on on internet and then people come out and go all right well yeah we saw that what are we paying you know 55 that's the big thing you know when i saw that already on on youtube so it's a challenge i think for comedians to kind of come up with equal to or greater than material that they have done previously. That's the challenge.
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See guarantee details at TurboTax.com slash guarantees. Ticket prices are a trip, right? Because I said, oh, you know, I'm just trying to warm up.
So I'll play this casino in Oroville. And then I see the tickets are like $195.
I got notes on stage. I'm working my old characters.
It's a little bit like, guys, I'd rather take a little less and not feel that fucking pressure. Am I going to give you 195 bucks worth of comedy? But I will observe one thing about you because you don't have any punchlines.
It's a little bit like with me chopping broccoli. People still, I don't know if you've heard of it, but it's this goofy song and there was no joke in it.
And so your bits have no joke it's like monty python or something the rhythms and the physicality you you probably would enjoy some of your stuff more the second time so i can see why you go okay i'm gonna do this bit maybe do an encore you know bill um regan brian regan had to do that because he had some bits that were just so the people just want to hear him and even before Twitter and TikTok yeah it's not jokes with surprise punchlines those kind of burn out those guys who do that style that's hard but anyway you go ahead yeah I think you're right sometimes it's just the way people do it like the chopping broccoli everybody could watch that over and over again I I did have a question on the chopping broccoli when you went you did a you did accoli, you did a Chopping Broccoli. Was that all in the moment there or was that planned? I'd done it in the clubs.
I think the first time I did it was at the Improv on Melrose. And that piano at midnight started it there.
So I was doing it in the clubs for probably a couple of years. So that was just a good representation, but there's no way I'm knowing when I'm going to go, you know, but I knew that I was going to escalate it, but I didn't know it would happen right at that moment.
You know, it's probably the way you work, you know, you and me, you know, no, but it's, uh, yeah, you, you, you kind of have an outline but you're not totally sure i know it's cold as ice paradise and the feeling was so nice he's a lady i know if i didn't know her she'd be the lady i didn't know you know and then we get in my lady went downtown she bought some broccoli and then there there i'm off once i get to chop broccoli then anything could happen chop in the clubs i'll do it for 10 minutes with a guitar yeah or when you did on snl i i've seen it but i watched it for the first time a week ago did it kill or was it one of those ones that like coneheads it doesn't do that well and then they do it again then it kills because they they're onto it you know what i mean they're like oh it takes them because sometimes those are just like weird bits and then they stick with everybody and everyone's like, oh, shit, that's great.

And you go, you know, it never killed because it's so new.

They don't even get it right away.

It did build.

I mean, the character, I had to call it a character.

I used to do it just as myself.

I'd set it up as rock stars losing inspiration.

But Derek Stevens and then it sort of built after time, but did well it was at the end of my first show but then I wrote a sketch later where Derek Stevens goes to his record company and they tell him that he has to die because they look at the record sales of Hendrix and Jim Morrison that kind of killed the character you know but anyway but back to our guests did you guys on snl i mean i do you look at other casts after you guys have left and said oh you know do you compare like oh when we were there it was the heyday or how do you guys like judge the show after you've been on it is something that you david i start with thinking they're all bad and then i go from there no i don't uh no it's it's we've talked about this because we we've talked to different generations garrett morris and lorraine newman and then we go newer cast and it's always about the same situation where some of them are, some sketches are good and some don't work as well. And then there's some cast members that kind of pop out and some flatline.
And that's just the way it's always been. I think I was lucky to have good people around me, but that wasn't for sure known at the time.
It was five years later, 10 years later

that everyone kind of held up.

I always think-

You know what I mean?

I could have some memories of the seven years

I had in there that was really,

went well and everything.

But when I see other people like later on,

like Sherry O'Terry,

or if I see Will Ferrell and stuff,

it's like, okay, they're better than I was.

That's how I go.

I go Bill Hader, Fred Armour.

Okay, I'm not as good as Kristen Wiig.igg i couldn't do that i couldn't do that again and so i always look at the cast beyond my time lovingly and with a lot of admiration you know because like i didn't do that you know because it's kind of unlimited you do what you do and then you leave the show but you know it keeps, it keeps being reinvented. I mean, how do you I'm just going to ask you because you didn't have cable and you're in the clubs.
Like, who were you who were you looking at? And you didn't have telephone. You didn't have a landline.
You know, but who are you like George Carlin? George Carlin. Who are you looking at? It was anybody on Johnny Carson.
So we would stay up and watch Johnny Carson. And I would be fascinated when the comedian would come on.
Back then, I think he got like seven or eight minutes. And I was like, just like, oh, wow, this is this is unbelievable.
Plus, back then we would listen to records of Garland or I would I would see cable on Saturday morning. I went over to my uncle's house to visit and he would tape all the the comedians for me to watch so i i that's kind of how i was introduced to stand-up was i i think first uh through through the tonight show so how old were you when you went to your uncle's house to look at the stand-ups to watch the playboy channel this is eight i was like seven eight years oh so you got the bug early you kind of yeah i was i was really really fascinated with stand-up comedy from a young age i just always thought it was i used to go to comedy clubs when i was 15 not to perform just to watch i had a fake id me and my girlfriend would go and there's a little comedy club in rosemont at the time i even forget the name of it um and we used to sit in the back and I used to sit there and marvel at the comedian going, gee, how does he remember all this? Exactly.
I did the same thing. Yeah.
And I'm like, are they just making this up like right now? They seem so confident. They're so scared.
Yeah. Did you see Seinfeld on there? I remember seeing Seinfeld.
I saw Leno on Carson. I saw Jeff Altman.
There's just some that stuck out. George Miller.
Remember that was, was that on Letterman? Letterman's friend, George Miller. But that's funny because you see him and that's really it.
And then you wait and see someone else on there. Rickles was always, as a kid, was the one who just made me laugh the hardest.
Because again, they're chewing on a biscuit. Again, no jokes.
Ed, the show started a half hour ago. Put them in the corner and give them a cookie.
Hey, Ed, give them the program. I mean, and he had his tricks, but still he made it feel so spontaneous.
Yeah. So I really enjoyed him in the Johnny Carson banter and the back.
Also, I liked when the, the, the, the talk shows had people on the couch yeah you would come out and they would goof around with the the girl next to you next to you everybody would be like having fun and now it's like you go out there and it's just you you and the host it would be nice to have this the first guest sitting next to you it's promotion and corporate greed and you know that was just like i mean there's one online there's so many online where rickles is just next to sinatra you know vini babongo called you know he's just doing all these fake italian names and uh sinatra was dying but yeah that bygone era can i ask you this uh were you introverted extroverted in the middle going through grade school or do you have years where you were kind of the king of the hill? Other years you were dormant. Shy, just shy kid, never class clown, just quiet, polite, just observe the class clown.
I never liked the class clown. I always thought it was funny.
Sorry, Dana. No, I was introverted as well.
But when I when i was in fourth grade i had a good year i got kind of cocky but fifth grade i went i went fourth grade i went dormant no fourth grade so i'm about i was a shoplifter i smoked cigarettes and i fought a lot of kids i fought i was like what happened your stock went down the next year i don't know you know that's that's the thing what i was going to say about confidence you know is there's 99 And then that happened? Your stock went down the next year? I don't know. You know, that's what I was going to say about confidence.
You know, there's 99% and then that last 1% is as big as the previous 99. And I think that's where you got to at a given point.
And so the audience, when they sense that kind of confidence, like Dave Chappelle when he's up there, you know, it's just like, that's at that high, high.

And you're there too. It takes 22 minutes to light his cigarette.

Everyone's like, I know.

And it's right.

You're actually.

It's funny.

Yeah, you're waiting.

You're actually, when you watch him, you hope that he likes you as an audience member.

That's how powerful he is.

But when you get to that level of confidence, that next, next wound down level, the audience

is so comfortable. They're so relaxed that you have command up there.
And you got there. I don't know what year it was, but you got there.
And it's fun to watch. I've seen recent specials.
I won't give names of big comics. I was one of them a few years back.
But their eyes are kind of big. And they're dancing for their dollars.
They're a sweaty and it's not their best set and you know you want to feel like the guy's not shooting a special you know you know sebastian's because the eyes get big beat a sweat and it ain't funny all of a sudden go ahead david he's not afraid not afraid to keep keep it silent for a second you know like i think uh i think i'm right when you uh oh yeah there's silence'm scared they're going to yell. I'm scared.
It's hard to sit there and be quiet and think of the next thing. I think Nate Bregazzi has good crowds where they wait.
You know what I mean? They're well-behaved. And to get a crowd, it's so much more fun to do throwaway jokes or to take a pause.
And then they go, but if you, I get rowdy sometimes. And so I can't leave that much.
And I think I like when someone like Sebastian just stops for a second, then he goes on the next thing and you're like, I'm in this. So if you're good, if you get a good crowd, you can do it.
Yeah. That's the biggest fear that I love the silence.
It's just, you don't know what people are going to say or do, or, or, you know, someone could yell out something because the audience feels sometimes maybe uncomfortable going, are we supposed to talk now? Or you do forget something. Yeah.
They want you to keep fucking going. They get uncomfortable.
They're like, maybe this is the time he wants me to yell something stupid. And they're right on cue.
You know you're in shape as a stand-up if you're up there and you have a bit and it's killing. And you're just in the back of your head, you go, oh, my God, if this is killing, I got three stacked right behind this.
You know, I can really relax now. Oh, yeah.
You know, that's a good place to be in. A good crowd is great.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, You gotta be, I mean, even, even sometimes you feel like, I don't know if you guys feel like you're doing a bit, maybe it's one of your favorite bits to do, but it doesn't come. It comes in the middle.
You put it in the middle. Right.
And then you feel like after that, you're like, the stuff that I got after this, not going to be as good as what they just saw. Right.
No. But you get at least for me, I get so excited to do that.
I got to move it up in the act. It keeps me kind of engaged.
And then after that, for me, I feel like, oh, man, it's a little bit of a letdown just to tell them these jokes, because I know they're not as good as what I just did. Or you get a weird crowd, not to interrupt you, I had this the other night, they're either really biting on everything or you go, oh, they're not biting on this, this is dirty and they're not biting and I'm like, uh-oh, I'm looking at my list going, we got some dirty ones coming up toward the end.
How do I get around these? Because why it's so hard on your feet to go, I got to move that up. I got to lose that.
But I still got to do enough time because if they're not biting on this one, they're not going to like the next. You can just tell.
I know. Get off it.
Get off it. It's such a psychological beating up there.
You're like. Don't you find it fascinating that you're saying they're not biting on this? Meaning as an audience.
As a whole group. Yeah.
Like they all got together and go, listen, we're not laughing at the dirty stuff tonight. But it's fascinating for me is like, how is it like everybody in the audience is not on board with this one particular.
Yep. Or Or they don't like the, the super dry stuff.
Like you can just come and have little musings that work. Like I think the other night I go on and I go, Hey, don't tell me what happened in the election.
I taped it. Don't tell me who won.
I taped it. And then, and then I got a big laugh next night.
I do it. They're just staring at me.
I'm like, what happened? What happened between last night and tonight?

At a certain point, it's too late to do that.

But for their two, three days there, and then I go, there's some throwaways in my act.

They weren't.

And they're like, we're not the throwaway crowd.

Give us the fastballs.

I'm like, fuck.

And that's what you realize early on.

And I go, I got an hour of this.

My problem is if I too early get too jumpy and i just go out and i go not gonna do it i'm fucked because that's it they did they some people leave after that they or if i go party on some half the crowd goes we got it we got it we heard it if i don't do anything else and then you do something else i go why are you something else? Why are you talking about anything but the church lady right now? I don't understand. Why? You're ruining it.
It's a good problem to have, but it's basically a greatest hits review. I might as well be at, you know, the Tropicana and Laughlin, you know, little Dennis Miller slipped in.
By the way, I'll be at the Tropicana and Laughlin on November 18, 19. You got the Sebastian cat on the pod today, huh? That's a toddling cat, you know, out there with the physicality.
Works it. Works it.
So another question. But we're going to get to all your credits, movies, TV shows in a sec.
He's like, please get to my credits. The PR person's going nuts.

When is he going to mention the bookie?

When is he going to do it?

When is he going to mention the bookie?

We got a two-hour podcast.

I can't do it.

Do you have to stretch before you go out?

I mean, do you kind of-

No, I do.

Early on, no.

But now I pop my calf a couple of times on stage.

Of all things.

Which bit was it or what?

I can't do the stealing home.

I don't do the stealing home bit. It was just a pivot move.
We were squatting. I went to go sprint from one side to the other as I went off my right leg.
I'm like, wow, did I just break my leg? It doesn't take much. You have to be at least 30.
So after that, it doesn't take a lot. You're like, what happened was I turned to grab the computer mouse and everyone's like, and I go, that was it.
I'm old enough that my, my toes will spasm during a set. Like they just start going out and getting all rigid.
I gotta go. I go, what the fuck? That's painful.
I can't put any weight on it. So I just go, not going to step over.
I'm trying to stir up ticket sales on this. I want to see you collapse.
I'm going to your show. So did you have to ice it, rest it, massage it? It was okay.
Yeah. I had to mention it to the crowd because it definitely hampered my movement.

I had sciatica for two years, and it really, really screwed with my acting. Ooh, that's wicked, wicked shit.

I don't know if you guys have dealt with that.

Does that go down your back, your leg or something?

Yeah, it goes to the side of your leg, into your calf.

Some people get it into their ankle and foot, but it's debilitating.

I couldn't move. It's hard to be funny when you're in like a lot of pain so i had to really work through that and it's it's gone now i did uh pilates to correct it i tried everything no but the little shots i was getting i was doing cupping massage whatever that was out there i was doing and then I fell upon this Lagree Pilates and all of a sudden two months in.

Yeah.

My wife had it.

Same thing.

Pilates, all that kind of stuff.

Could I ask you what special when you were in massive pain did you record?

What was the name of that special when you were in pain?

That was the last one.

Is it me in the tuxedo? Really? I'm oh that was the last one he probably decided not to record what is your last one called is it me yeah or i thought it ain't right no it ain't right is the the tour the tour yeah yeah and then is it me yeah yeah and how would you the next one is what time is it what time is it i'm Yeah. Yeah.
Is it me? And how would you fool Sebastian? What time is it?

What time is it?

I'm running out of special names. Sebastian, you have one called Give It a Rest.

Give it a rest.

Mine's called Beep Bop Boop.

I mean, they go, is this a real one?

I'm like, I don't know.

He had a special that even.

Pencil it in.

He had a special.

He named it.

The name was so nondescript that for two years in this podcast,

neither of us could remember the name of his current special. What was the name of it? They're always like either two words or just something kind of cutesy.
Good question. Aren't you embarrassed? What's wrong with people? Yeah.
Get your facts straight. Oh, yeah.
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If you name a special, do you have to say the name in the act? That's a great question. I, you know, people go, I'll watch your special and give you a name.
I'm like, you won't. Because there's not some running theme of like, I was abused by my father the whole special.
They're like, oh, I got one. You're like, no, it's just all goofy, dumb jokes, and it makes no sense.
So, I'm going to have a special name. When I heard Rock named his tambourine, and I didn't get it at all, but I just liked that it was different.
And spelled different. And then he said, when you're married, sometimes you're the lead.
Sometimes you play the tambourine and let them shine. And I was like, oh, okay.
So it has some thought to it. So I liked that.
But I liked it anyway because it was just weird. And it's always fun to think of a name and then no one really cares.
I had one good one and one terrible one. The good one was the 90s.
I called it Critics' Choice with four stars. And I never talked about it on cable TV.
It would come up on Comedy Central. Dana Carvey, Critics' Choice, four stars.
My sister would call me and say, you got Critics' Choice again. Then in 2016, I had an Irish nephew from Dublin.
It's Stella Adler in Hollywood. And it was right when Wokeness was coming in and they said this and this and this, but straight white males need not apply for some class.
So he goes, man, you should name it that. So I named him a straight white male 60.
I don't know why, because some people said, that's going to catch you. I would click on that.
And then I'm on the great late Norm MacDonald's podcast and goes podcast and goes so i sound special i mean what was that title about and he is a kind of has nothing to do with straight white mail right and i don't know it nothing there's no bit in there about it it's completely just slapped like that you confused norm with that i did i know than me what does it mean where's a bit about understand. So we all love Norm, of course.
Throws it in. I just threw that in in case people don't understand that.
We make fun of Norm all the time. We love Norm.
I mean, I love to do him because I'm visiting with him. So the bookie is what your PRP, is that why you're on right now? He's on because he likes us.
He's a big fan no it's uh um i watched one of the the first episode today it was it's very cool i mean you had ray romano on on it you know and you were in that movie with him somewhere in queens yeah yeah so yeah so it's coming out in december our second season uh yeah i mean the whole acting thing for me has been a struggle to kind of wrap my head around coming off you know stand-up comedy and getting that immediate you know gratification on stage and then all of a sudden you're acting and now it's uh we're gonna do that again we're gonna move the cameras and this and that just for me it's like i get like i get impatient it's like all right come on let's uh it's not really fun is it unless it's documentary style but if it's like we're coming around you know we're moving we're moving in oh really you hate yourself when you start um repeating the way you did a joke over and over on different takes it makes me sick to be honest oh you know because I keep doing it and they go do it they go do it again i'm like it's just it's not funny and they go now do it again this is the one we're probably going to use i'm like now it's 48 takes in i've been giving it my all hi yeah hey and then i gotta do it again and the people across me are like oh so all that that was all planned that little throwaway ad lib i'm like yes you get it now sorry but in your act you do it once and you keep moving everyone's like oh hey they do the master shot at 8 a.m right david they do the mass shot then a second or third master shot but the time you get to the money shot on you it's like eight nine hours later you've actually said the words over 200 times it doesn't even sound like english at at that point. Then the reviews, the comedian, the impressionist struggles with his acting skills.
No, fucking do Larry David with me. Just shoot everything every second.
One time to just bring it back to us. That's how proud of it.
We were on a, when we did Tommy Boy, Brian Dennehy came in to play Farley's dad. We all love him from fucking First Blood or whatever.
And so we were all excited. So we didn't realize, because it was our first big movie or any movie, that we were – Pete, the director, who's a great guy, we love him.
But to make sure – because we were new, I think Paramount told him, just make sure you get it. So we're doing 15 masters.
Forget about the over-the the over the shoulder and then a two shot and then a over the wide shot and then a loose two close up so we're doing that's what we're taking all day and then brian dennehy after three takes of the masters they go all right going in he goes what the fuck what are we doing what are we doing here we got it go move on move on i love it we just did three how many we're gonna be on this at a second at the beginning and a second at the end of the scene what are we doing and i are we doing here? We got it. Go, move on, move on.
I love it. We just did three.
How many, we're going to be on this a second at the beginning and a second at the end of the scene. What are we doing? And I was like, are you allowed to say this? What's going on? And then, and then, because, you know, Farley gives it a thousand, 10%.
I give it about 64. And so at the, he's just so burned out and drinking coffee.
And we're like, we haven't even pushed in for the stuff we're going to use.

So he was sort of trying to protect us a little bit in a very loud voice.

I had Robert Losha.

It's great.

Do that.

Want a movie?

Oh,

that's another exact type.

He goes up to director,

gets in his face.

You're wearing out the actors.

You're wearing them the fuck out.

And the director's like shriveling down.

I did Roadhouse.

Yeah.

I played a piano with Tom Hanks, you fuck face face we shot roadhouse in a day and a half that's patrick swayze was brian was uh robert lotion and roadhouse i think he's a bad guy lived across the lake anyway back to sebastian sebastian bookie bookie the bookie on max Comes out December what 12th

12th

Oh

Second season

I'm sorry

92% on Rotten Tomatoes

Good job

Excuse me

I've never gotten that much combined

Farewell 88%

Farewell 72

No that is a

That's a very loving

Amount to get

I have a movie on there

That's 0.5%

Thank you. farewell 72 no that is a that's a very loving amount to get I have a movie on there that's 0.5% I think I'm not kidding I have a movie that they go this one's they go it's good your movie's almost fresh on Rotten Tomatoes I go am I buying something that's almost fresh I mean almost fresh means it sucks that means you're in the 40s.
I think they tricked me. I go, that's, they go, that's good.
I'm like, is it good for me or is it good? Is it good for society? Yeah. Jesus.
All right. Well, Sebastian, thank you, bud.
What else can I ask? Thank you. I appreciate it.
He's a good guy. I will see you at the store.
He's a brilliant standup. I think you're an excellent actor, by the way.
I like watching you act. Thank you.
And you wrote a book. I don't know what you haven't done, but, you know, just keep on keeping on.
If we run into each other somewhere, what would you want me to say to you? I have a backstage at the comedy store. What would you like me to say? Hey, Sebastian.
We'll just pick it up right before we left off right here we just yeah let's go into the next question start start about the bookie and then just go from are you gonna run and tell your wife and kids they said i was really physical and musical yeah no it's gonna be at the dinner table tonight do you know what the they said about daddy you know what they said and you them up, holding them. Anyway, it was so much fun to have you on here.
And thanks for letting us blab. But yeah, keep on doing and just have fun, I guess.
Enjoy yourself. I mean, it's...
I am enjoying myself. And it was a pleasure talking to both of you, two guys that I kind of grew up watching on tv and uh you know sometimes it's like you know you got to wrap your head around these things it's like yeah watching you as a kid now we're doing a podcast together sometimes it's you know plays with your head a little bit going i i told i had it with martin short and steve martin you know like really you a peer? What? Is this where we're at now? Are you crazy? But yeah, I totally get that.
Don't ever lose that. Appreciate it.
And you're making a lot of people happy. I know that sounds really corny, but from where I'm at, people fucking need to laugh in life.
And so it's a good thing. It's a good stock and trade to do.
So, all right. All right, guys.

Enjoy yourself.

Enjoy your holidays.

Thank you.

You too.

This has been a presentation of Odyssey.

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Fly on the Wall is executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Jenna Weiss-Berman

of Odyssey, and Heather Santoro. The show's lead producer is Greg Holtzman.