The Talented Mr. Ripley

This is Free With Ads, the podcast that asked the question: why pay Netflix eight bucks a month to watch eight episodes of Ripley when you can go online for free and see essentially the same story in a shorter amount of time, and you can use all those extra hours to get your disaster of a life in order?

I'm Jordan Morris.

And I'm Emily Fleming.

Today's movie is The Talented Mr.

Ripley, or as I like to call it, Two Butt Shots and a Little Bit of Peen.

With us always is the super producer, the He Freak Matt Lieb, hitting us with those lush, decadent drops.

God, don't you want to fuck everyone you see just once?

What's up?

I certainly do Philip Seymour Hoffman's character.

Before we talk about this movie, which is, as of this recording, streaming free with ads, we're going to talk about something else we saw for free on the internet this week.

There it is.

Last week, had a great time talking about Dune with y'all and

just

enjoying

what a a great wonderful dude David Lynch was.

It got me thinking about something he used to do on the radio here in LA.

He would read the weather.

I think it started on 97.1 when it was an alternative rock station.

And then I think he did it on KCRW, which was like one of our NPR stations.

What?

It would be these several days.

I didn't know that he was doing it on the radio.

I thought he just did it on his YouTube channel.

So I didn't know he did it on his YouTube channel.

But what did I discover?

I was thinking about these weird David Lynch weather reports, and I saw that a lot of them are archived on YouTube.

So yeah, basically, David Lynch.

I love this divide, by the way.

I love it.

Because Emily, of course, you only know it from YouTube.

And Jordan, of course, you only know it from NPR.

Sure.

It's both very you.

Yeah, where the, yeah, where these two things intersect is David Lynch reading the weather.

Yes.

And anyway, so yeah, these are on YouTube.

They're great.

I wanted to play one, a little visual thing here.

At some point, he's going to reference something he's holding up.

He's just holding up an apple to the camera.

Yeah, if you haven't heard these before,

they're great.

He reads the actual weather in LA and just does some David Lynch weird shit.

So here's one of those now.

Good morning.

It's November 29,

2020, and it's a Sunday

here in LA,

a clear morning with a bit of a breeze blowing

around

48 degrees Fahrenheit, maybe 9 Celsius.

This is something to think about today.

And

they taste so good.

Should be going up to around

76 degrees Fahrenheit this afternoon, around 25 Celsius.

And it looks like we're going to be enjoying blue skies and golden sunshine all along the way.

Everyone,

have a great day.

God bless this man.

I know.

Automatically the highest energy thing that's ever been on NPR.

Yeah.

It's like, whoa,

this is so youthful.

Who's this psycho chuck jock?

Look at this apple.

Anyway, I tried to go to his

resting place for my birthday party.

And I had set a little picnic for people to come by at like four o'clock.

And then

I get a call from one of my friends.

They're like, they're closing the cemetery.

I was like, what?

What are you talking about?

And I guess now on the weekends, they close at 4.30, which during the pandemic, it was sunset.

So you could just go and like sunset.

Now they have set times and it's super early.

And I think it's because David Lynch and Paul Rubin are buried there now.

And it's like a lot.

I think they're

pretty high-profile graves that are there now.

So weirdos are showing up.

And they're like, okay, we got to hire more security for all these.

Yeah, we need off these guys.

We need to fend off these Gen X guys.

Yeah, pretty much.

But yeah,

I'm going to go to both of their.

I didn't realize Paul Rubin was buried at Hollywood Forever Cemetery as well.

So I'm going to go bring flowers and stuff.

I'll take some pictures there too.

Post-I wonder how famous you have to be to be buried there.

You just have to pay money to be buried there because often most of the cemetery is not famous people.

It's just people who lived in Hollywood.

Oh, okay.

That makes more sense.

Yeah.

Also, from the David Lynch on YouTube collection, this is actually a listener suggestion.

Our listener, Jackson O'Brien, wrote in on the topic of weirdo celebrity music projects.

I had forgotten about this.

This is David Lynch's song/slash music video nightmare.

It's called Crazy Clown Time, and I believe he is singing on this.

So, Matt, play a bit of Crazy Clown Time.

Susie,

she ripped her shirt off completely.

Polly,

yeah,

ring shirt.

Okay, I want to issue our listeners a challenge.

All right, if you're out there, fuck to this.

Do it.

I dare you.

I get the distinct feeling that our audience has fucked to to this.

You might be right, Matt.

This might be right.

It feels like in their wheelhouse.

I mean, this, the background, it all sounds very like Twin Peaks

stuff.

So it's not, it sounds like the roadhouse kind of thing.

It's easier to fuck to this than it is to,

you know, that the Back to the Future guys weird clown

song.

I'm a clown, and then I like, I have a frown.

Yeah, that one, I think I'd be like, I like James Brown.

I couldn't concentrate with that.

This one, I could kind of feel it.

Might might happen a little too fast.

Yeah, oh, oh no, Pete.

No fire next time.

Yeah,

yeah, definitely

check out the video.

It is a sexual nightmare.

Beware.

Very intense.

But, you know, if you're listening to this show,

probably your deal.

And yeah, he doesn't start saying crazy clown time until like five minutes into the video.

Wait, how long is the video?

Seven minutes.

Jesus Christ.

Seven minutes in heaven.

Yes.

Yes.

Yeah,

it's closer to hell.

But it's a goddamn hoot while you're there.

Anyway, yeah, Diva Lynch, great guy.

A lot of fun YouTube stuff.

But hey, you know what else is fun?

This week's movie, The Talented Mr.

Ripley.

Before we talk about this movie, we should mention that it does contain suicide.

So if that's not something you want to hear about, we're going to play some music and give you a chance to find another episode.

We're back.

It's free with ads.

We're going to talk about the talented Mr.

Ripley.

Have y'all either seen, have y'all seen this movie, the recent Netflix series, or read the book?

Yeah,

no.

Yes, yes, Yes, to all.

Yes, no, to all.

Oh, wow.

Okay.

You've oh, you so you've oh, that's funny.

So when we were picking movies last week, I think you suggested this, and I think we were all stoked in a way that led me to believe that we all love this movie.

I mean, I think that I've like the thing is, it's always on.

I feel like it's like I've seen

it, it was a big cable movie for a while.

Yeah, it's always on, but after watching it, I was like, oh, no, I definitely haven't seen this.

I guess it's like Matt Damon's face makes you think you've seen anything that you're doing.

100%.

And then I was like, I think I saw something else he was in, and it wasn't this.

I'm thinking of we bought a zoo.

Yeah, exactly.

He kills an elephant with an oar.

Well, the funny thing is, I was on the horn with the folks the other night, and they were telling me, I hadn't even told them we were going to do this movie.

And they were like, we were, we just were struggling.

We were trying to watch a movie called Saltburn.

Yes.

Yes.

And I was like, oh, yeah, maybe not, maybe not for you.

And they were like, we just couldn't do it.

And I'm like, well, people say it's a lot like talented Mr.

Ripley.

And it's like, then I watched this movie and was like, wait, this is exactly Saltburn.

Yes, yes.

Just nobody earns their red wings in this movie.

Yeah, and no one fucks a grave.

Yeah.

Spoiler alert if you haven't seen Saltburn, but a grave is fucked.

A grave is fucked.

Yeah.

I mean, like, there's even a bathtub thing in Terry's movie.

So I was watching it going, wow, I really liked Saltburn when it came out.

And now I'm kind of like, is Saltburn just like a grotesque version of this story?

Maybe a little bit.

Essentially, yes, yes.

But it also has, you know, Barry

Coagulant or whatever his last name is.

Coagulant.

Yeah, Coagulant.

Yeah, and he is fantastic in it.

So I don't mind that at all.

He is, but my mom said she was like, that Barry, what's his name?

Kyogen?

I think he's going to have a hard time finding a woman to reproduce with him.

I don't think that'll be a problem.

We got to cut that.

We're going to have to cut that.

I think Barry's fine.

He is.

But then

I told her that he cheated on Sabrina Carpenter, and she was like, what?

She got pissed just like America did all over again.

I didn't even know that until just now.

Yeah.

Wow.

It's too bad.

Well, yeah, let's talk about this movie.

I have seen this movie before.

I like it a lot.

And I recently watched the Netflix series.

And

I was skeptical because I'm like, oh boy, eight episodes.

Netflix, what are you doing?

What do you mean?

I'm going to talk about it too.

The streaming TV.

It's a cold take, of course.

But yeah, things are slowed down.

Nothing really happens.

And I think the Netflix version is very slow and weird, but in a way that I liked.

So

I was surprised how into the Netflix version I was.

So you watched the whole thing?

I watched the whole thing, yeah.

So is the Netflix version a retelling of this story or is there new adventures?

It's closer to the book,

and so that's why it allows itself to be a little bit longer.

I mean, a lot of bit longer.

But yeah, no, it's essentially the same story just told

just with some extra detail.

It's like if you're really into Ripley lore, you're going to love the show.

Okay.

You're going to love the show.

Well, I might watch it now.

But the movie.

Do you want to know everything about the book Marge is writing?

Then the Netflix series is for you.

I love all the shit about the book Marge was writing.

Oh, that's cool.

Because they kind of just, that was a throwaway in this movie of her going, I came here to write a book and I'm like, bitch, who cares?

Yeah, right.

And then like.

That's how they treated it in the movie, too.

Whereas the characters.

Well, that's what I mean.

In the movie, it was like, yeah, they barely mentioned it.

So why are we mentioning it?

But I would love to know if they had mentioned it more, if she had really talked about it that way.

And the book, yeah, the book is used in a very fun way at the end, too.

So yeah, definitely like...

If you're a Ripley head,

believe it or not, you should watch the Netflix series as well.

Yeah, let's talk about this movie from 1989, I believe.

It starts out, Tom Ripley, played by Matt Damon.

He is playing piano on a rooftop.

He has a borrowed Princeton jacket, not his.

And he's playing piano for a bunch of rich people, including

maybe the ultimate that guy from that thing, James Reborn.

The guy totally.

If you need a mean senator, if you need an industrialist, if you need a dad who doesn't approve, call James Reborn.

He's very, very much dad doesn't approve.

That's not approved.

He's great.

He also fits in any time period.

He looks like he could be, well, maybe not like biblical times, but like

any like 1900s era, anything.

It's like you believe he exists.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I don't think he was in

1994 Independence Day.

He was.

Oh, he was in that.

Yeah.

I was going to say, he should have been.

He's a mean senator in that.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah.

But he is in Independence Day.

Okay, so James Reborn's son is Dickie Greenleaf.

Dickie Greenleaf, he's a spoiled rich kid.

He is off in Italy fucking around, listening to jazz.

Oh, no.

Insolent noise.

This guy hates jazz.

So

the proposal is that

since Tom Ripley apparently went to Princeton, he is going to go to Italy, find Dickie, bring him back, and stop him from just like wasting his dad's money on jazz.

Yes.

What I love about this in the movie is

like in the book and also in the series it's it's much more clear from the beginning that tom ripley is a con artist and that's kind of how he makes his living in the movie it does just seem like he lucked into this free trip like he you know oh i just wore the jacket because i needed something to wear during the recital that i had during my gig and so it's just it's really funny watching this movie and going like oh no he's he he usually does this this is just on a whim i'd argue that every like con artist decision that he makes in this movie makes it seem like well just a spur of the moment that's true whoopsie like that's true and i i wish that was different i wish that that was i i wish it was treated a little differently i think that the reason they cast matt damon is he has this like

innocent face innocent likable boy next door kind of like floppy haired thing that you would be like surely he'd never.

Yes.

And so maybe that's the point.

Maybe we just believe all of it is happening.

It's interesting in the Netflix show, the character is played by, I forget the actor's name, he was Hot Priest.

He is Hot.

Hot Priest and Fleabag, yes.

Hot Priest and Fleabag.

And he plays it like a fucking psycho the whole time.

Yay.

It is.

So, yeah, very, that's the huge, like, big difference is like, oh, Matt Damon, of course, they would welcome him into his circle.

Oh, gee, whiz, I'm just a kid and I brush rich guys at the opera and that's my job.

I brush the rich guys in the bathroom.

And yes, it's very, yeah, very, very, I think they are both very fun in their own way.

Hot Priest played by Andrew Scott.

Andrew Scott, thank you, thank you.

Who I need to watch it because, I mean, Hot Priest, but also

Hot Priest is a gay man.

And let me tell you, does not matter.

I think in the past, people worried that, like, oh, if you came out as gay, women would not find you as hot incorrect.

Yeah, it seems like times are changing on that a bit.

I don't think that women ever gave a shit.

I think people just thought we would, but we don't.

And yeah.

But I didn't realize how kind of homoerotic this story was.

Oh, yeah.

And boy, how

it's even hotter than Dune was.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's kind of like doing it for me.

That's one of the like really, I think, brilliant themes about the whole Ripley, you know,

oeuvre

Is that like Oeovra?

Yeah, well, listen, I'm very smart.

Is just the theme of being closeted and lying.

And that's the movie kind of tends to go closer to that and less towards the Ripley as a psychopath who is a con artist.

Yeah, he probably doesn't, I don't think that he has any desires other than to the desire of chaos.

Yeah.

And loving, you know, Dickie Greenleaf.

Yeah.

And, you know, and wanting and wanting the life that he sees from the outside.

Yeah.

But yeah,

it's wacky.

It has a lot of baggage.

So yeah, he goes to Italy.

He sees Jude Law out there on his fucking yacht.

And he's spying on him.

And his girlfriend Marge, played by Gwyneth Paltrow.

There's a great little shot of Matt Damon practicing his Italian.

And he's repeating the phrase.

He's repeating the place.

This is my face.

This is my face.

As he's looking at Judah.

What What the fuck was that?

Very cool.

That will be your face soon after you smash it with an oar.

So, yeah.

So

he goes to accidentally run into

Jude Law and Gwyneth Paltrow on the beach.

And he's like, oh, I remember you from Princeton.

And Jude Law is like, Princeton's like a fog.

America's like a fog.

And Gwyneth Paltrow just gives Matt Damon this look of like, I'm sorry about him.

I know.

She,

Gwyneth Paltrow, like, I haven't watched a Gwyneth Paltrow thing in a while.

And, like, she's become kind of a punchline now because of Scoop and kind of her weird stuff.

She's so fucking good in this.

Yeah.

Like, the character's underwritten, too.

Like, as we mentioned, you're like, what's the deal with Marge's book?

Who cares?

They mention it once.

And, like, it, and just her little

non-verbal acting stuff is great.

She makes a fucking meal out of this.

Yeah, she is.

Gwyneth Paltrow apparently got famous for a reason.

I mean, she's a good actress.

I think that she is a good actress.

There's no doubt about it.

Sometimes a Nepo baby can be very talented.

Yeah, there's great Nepo babies out there.

I think there's an argument that her win at the Oscars was undeserved.

And

I would agree.

What did she win for?

Shakespeare and Love.

Completely deserved.

Yeah.

Well, I will die on the hill if Shakespeare and Love is one of the best movies in the past 30 years.

Well, Harvey Weinstein would agree.

Oh, no.

Just, okay.

So I listen, sometimes you agree with Harvey.

You know, Hitler was a vegetarian.

What?

You think Hitler's good?

Emily Fleming said numbs.

But no, no.

I think that it was like out of all the parts she's done, it was just not her best.

And that's, but I do think she's an Oscar

caliber actress.

Oh, yeah.

But I think that's why people say that she's a bad actress is because of that she won for that role.

Sure.

But no, she's done a lot of great work.

And this one was

fantastic.

I don't know why.

How long has the Oscars been going on?

A long time.

Long.

How often?

Since the 1920s.

How often does whack shit win at the Oscars?

All the time.

Can we all stop going, like, why did this win?

It's the Oscars.

Wack shit wins.

Yeah, who cares?

Who cares?

The good movie you love won't win an Oscars.

Some weird down the middle, whack shit will win.

You're absolutely right, Jordan.

If there was any justice, then Ace Ventura, Pet Detective, would have won the best guy.

God.

We all agree with that.

And Tony Collette would have won for hereditary.

Yeah, sure.

Yes, there's not a cool Oscars.

There's just the Oscars.

The Oscars.

There's just the Oscars.

There's just the Oscars.

Let's all fucking deal with it.

Anyway,

so he's kind of like

in their inner circle now.

He's got this gee whiz, this kind of gee whiz energy that they're they love.

They're bringing him in.

He notices that Jude Law is out there riding a scooter with an Italian girlfriend.

That's right.

He's cheating on Marge, and Matt Damon stores that little nugget away to use later.

So he is,

so at dinner, he kind of like does this little impression of Jude Law's dad and Jude Law's, and kind of lets it all, you know, come out of like, oh, well, your dad sent me here and I'm supposed to bring you home.

They love this.

He accidentally drops a bunch of jazz records because he knows Dickie loves jazz.

I was trying to steal your identity matten, so I did this with a bunch of corn albums.

Hell yeah.

I'm like, oh no, all my corn albums.

Oh, it just all fell out of my locker.

You guys, you guys,

on the internet, on Instagram, on the Lord's Instagram, Jonathan Davis is designing dog clothes now.

What?

Okay, that's a pivot.

Are they loving Dickie Goth dog clothes?

Yes, they're cool, like, new metal style.

Okay.

A lot of spikes, a lot of cool stuff.

Hell yeah.

The police.

He's got like a black standard poodle, which

I would not have guessed.

No, I mean, the black part I would have guessed.

But not the poodle.

Then again, hypoallergenic.

Who's to say that Jonathan Davis doesn't have allergies?

Well, yeah.

Yeah.

So talented Mr.

Ripley.

Talented Mr.

Ripley.

Do you know if Jonathan Davis from Korn has allergies?

Right.

That's free with ads at maximum.

So now that he knows that Tom is into jazz, not really, he just kind of got into it so he could trick him, he takes him to this Italian jazz club, this fucking scene.

Let me, I want to live in this scene.

Like, if

like if you just watch the first 35 minutes of this movie, it's about the greatest vacation of all time.

Yes, yes.

Like, I love it.

I just want to hang out in the first 35 minutes of this movie.

100%.

I feel that every time I watch this movie, which is just like, I just, I'm like, oh, I wish things didn't go to hell.

Why can't they just be friends and not just be the rest of the movie?

They're just hanging out and best friends, and maybe they kiss.

Like, what's so bad about that?

Yes, and why can't society let us love who we'd like to love?

Exactly.

And I mean, he's like,

what does Dickie know about love?

You know, at this point, he's just lusting.

Let him kiss Tom.

It would have been nice.

Let him kiss Tom.

Yeah, and then we go into

one of the sauciest scenes in the movie.

Jude Law playing chess in the bath.

And you have kind of fully clothed Matt Damon playing chess against him, and he's like, I'm a little cold.

Can I get in the bath?

There's this little scene.

Will they, won't they?

Are they gonna?

We don't know.

They don't do it.

Jude Law gets out.

As we mentioned in the intro, we get a butt.

Yay.

A little bit of peen.

Just a little bit.

Oh, I didn't see the little bit of peen.

There's a little bit, yeah.

Oh, it's there.

It's there.

All right.

You can rewind it, screenshot it.

You can do whatever you want with that image.

Well, we can't screenshot it on YouTube because they're being dicks about it.

That's true.

They don't allow it.

They are the peen.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Dicks.

So, so you know,

they're buddies now, but buddies who can never kiss, apparently.

They decided to go on a little trip to Rome and they're hanging out in Rome.

Either you've ever been to Rome or Italy?

No.

I went to Milan once.

Ooh.

Yeah, because what for?

Well, it was like a big road trip, like train, you know, train trip around

Europe with my sister.

And the last stop was Milan.

And it was, I don't remember much of it except for.

I saw people doing heroin right in front of me, which I was kind of like, oh, good to know.

And I had some really good pasta.

And I was like, well, that makes sense.

Wait, when you're in Italy, try the pasta.

You gotta try the pasta.

Try the pasta.

You gotta try it.

I don't know.

Did it look like the heroin was good?

You'd know, man.

The heroin did look good.

Um, try the pasta.

Try the heroin.

And yeah, because you're having pasta, you're going to want to get the red heroin.

That's right, the red, exactly.

Or, you know, the you know, of course, if it's not in the champagne region of France, it is actually just sparkling heroin.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Is that the funniest thing ever said on this show?

First,

I mean, it might be close.

It's close.

It might be.

Anyway,

so they're in Rome and, you know, just a bunch of Italian guys.

We see them all hanging out at a cafe, clapping for women as they walk along.

They love it.

They love it.

They love street harassment, but it's fun.

It's fun and cute.

Yeah.

It's with an Italian accent, so everyone's cool with it.

Everyone's cool.

It's fun.

Street harassment.

I'll go after I turn 40 and then no one will see me.

They just won't even notice me.

I think they will.

They'll say, oh, Americana.

They'll go, eh,

they'll love you.

So,

so yeah.

And then fucking

Dickie's alpha friend, Philip Seymour Hoffman, rolls up.

Amazing.

It's totally great.

He rolls up in this like sports car, starts fucking

just being an alpha, alpha drunk dick.

They all go on a yacht.

He's such a good, like, I know.

Dickhead?

Prep school dickhead.

He's great.

It's amazing, too, because, you know, before I had seen a bunch of Philip Seymour Hoffman movies, before I had seen this one, I kind of like watched this movie a little bit late.

And

so I was not used to him playing this type of character.

And it was, I think, the first time where I was just like, oh, is he the greatest actor of our generation?

Yeah.

Because he played it so well.

I was like, I just, I kind of looked at him as kind of like gross, clownish, desperate.

Like he played all those types of characters.

And this one, he's like confident.

He's his confidence makes him more handsome and kind of vindictive.

And I'm like, I love it.

Yeah.

So good.

Although I wish he didn't.

What's also interesting is like

I haven't seen a movie with him in it in a while.

And when I was younger, like, you know, you kind of look at the, you would pay more attention to the Jude Laws and

the Matt Damons, but you're like, God, he is gorgeous.

Like, he's really beautiful.

And I think it's, you know, you learn, you learn when you get older.

Yeah, you learn who to treasure.

That standards are created by somebody else.

That's right.

The media.

They all go on a little yacht trip, and then kind of Jude Law and Gwyneth Paltrow, like, have sex below deck where everybody can kind of see.

And we know that Matt Damon is kind of like watching through a little mirror.

And Philip Seymour Hoffman says this, and it is one of my favorite deliveries.

Tommy,

how's the peeping?

Tommy,

how's the peeping?

Tommy.

How's the peeping?

How's the peeping?

Just one of those deliveries that

is, I got that clip from a YouTube channel that is called Tommy How's the Peeping.

No.

That is the name of the channel.

128 subscribers.

And there's a couple other clips on the channel.

One is, I guess, the owner of a channel, the channel, filming himself eating cereal.

So a lot of fun stuff going on over there on Tommy House the Peeping.

No.

Yeah.

But it's a great scene because this character comes in and totally wrecks Tom's image.

Like, you know, Tom is doing a great job of projecting that he's supposed to be there.

He's also someone who graduated from Princeton.

He's also blue-blooded, whatever.

And this guy sees right through him immediately.

And so it's like you start, it starts just fucking with Tom.

And I remember watching this movie and just being like, stop messing with him.

He just wants love.

Just let him lie.

Stop lying.

Let him lie.

Yes.

And that's the thing is, like, I mean, because probably largely because Matt Damon, like, you're, you're kind of on Tom's side.

100%.

You know, you want, and I think there's some shit in this movie of like, how bad a guy is Jude Law, right?

Like, what has Jude Law done?

And you, you kind of want to root for Matt Damon even when he's like murdering people.

Yeah, because he's doing it and he's crying.

And

every single one.

He doesn't want to murder everyone.

No, he doesn't want to.

He's backed into a corner.

And, you know, it's like, again, it's the big difference between like sort of the source material and the movie is that like mostly it just seems like he's backed into a corner and has to be like a con man and a murderer.

Well, and he has some darkness in him where he impulsively or compulsively reacts and like

and then regrets it later.

So, I think he's got a sick darkness about him because

you don't just kill somebody on a boat for

there is something super relatable about how embarrassing it is to get caught in a lie.

that you'd be like, would I be willing to murder to not have to admit an uncomfortable truth?

And it's like, I think

probably not, but I don't know, man.

You guys ever been caught in a lie before?

It really makes you want to be like, well, no one needs to know about this.

Sometimes you just got to murder.

Yeah.

No.

Have you guys ever been caught in a lie that you like figured out a way to get out of?

Oh, no, I mean, I feel like, no, I feel like every time I've been caught in a lie, it's just been like, well, yeah, well,

there's no, like, I start laughing.

I mean, what is the, what is the truth?

Right.

What is

at some point?

I start laughing when I get caught in a lie because I'm so bad at lying that eventually I just start sputtering.

The person who's found me out usually sputters.

My parents busted me and I just really doubled down and tried to.

Oh, yeah.

And they knew.

They knew.

It was so embarrassing.

I had snuck a boy into my grandparents' basement

in the summertime in St.

Louis.

Was this someone like, it was a ghost?

No, no.

I just kind of was like, I have no idea what you're talking about.

Because I couldn't imagine how they found out.

But it was my papa, my grandfather, saw him like.

skirting out of the basement to get back to his car, which is

worse.

Why is there come on the Christmas tree stand?

Yeah, but it's like,

God, that's the worst case scenario: him finding out that his granddaughter is a slut.

You know, it's the worst.

You should have killed him.

That's also Ripley would have done.

Hit him with a horror.

Somebody in this family gave me these titties, and it's probably from that side of the family.

So, your fault, Papa.

Yeah.

Way to go.

God, my mom's going to hate this episode.

So, we, okay, so there's, so there's all this going on.

Uh, there's a new alpha friend in town, Matt Damon, feeling very, very neglected

until they

go to this event.

What is this?

It is a bunch of hunks emerging from the water carrying a Virgin Mary statue.

Is this like Italian Christmas?

What is this?

Well, because Easter just happened.

Is this an Italian election?

Yeah, that's how they picked the Pope.

Well, I mean, I guess I thought this was Easter because we just had Easter, so I just went, This is Easter, but then you think that would be a crucifix coming out of the water, but sure, I don't, I don't know.

So, yeah, it looked really, it was really funny when the hunky guys came out.

Yes, and uh, you know, sorry out there if you're listening and we're uh joking about a cherished religious tradition,

it was a little funny

when they came out, and then it wasn't existed, yeah, it existed, I think, for just to add to sort of like the

homoerotic aesthetic of the

scene of the relationship.

It also, like, you know, metaphorically

is meant to kind of be foreshadowing of what's going to soon be thrown into the water.

Oh, my God.

I didn't even put that together, Matt.

Yeah, I watch it a lot.

I like art.

But

one woman comes out the water, one woman goes in.

Yes,

one blessed virgin.

And yeah, so as we alluded to, this is when you find out that Jude Law's Italian girlfriend, she is found, drowned in the water.

We learn later that she was pregnant.

And, you know, the kind of the implication is that she did this to kind of...

Not a very good Catholic.

No, well, or the best Catholic.

Who knows?

Hard to tell.

Hard to know.

What are the rules?

Help us, hunks.

Explain Catholicism.

Emerge from the water and explain Catholicism.

So, yeah, so she,

so it's kind of implied that she killed herself.

But when I was watching this, I'm like, are they kind of trying to make you believe that Jude Law did it?

You know, I think there's these little moments where he kind of seems like he knows a little bit more about it.

Anyway, I just something I noticed on this rewatch.

It's like, I think they are trying to

really make you seem like

is Jude Law a villain who deserved to die?

Right.

Yes.

I think that's exactly right.

I think it's they

my

in my brain it goes to the theory of

well everyone likes Matt Damon.

He can't be a sociopathic con man.

So he has to have someone worse than him.

Let's make Dickie so atrocious and possibly a murderer that it's okay when he gets his comeuppance.

Yeah, I remember seeing her character kind of sneaking around the edge of

like a building that's right next to the water.

But I don't remember seeing him anywhere.

So, in my opinion, she

did the deed.

Right.

But I could see the suggestion.

I could see.

I think at the very least, it's supposed to imply that, like, this is that dick.

It's his fault.

It's his fault.

It's either through his negligence or through his, you know, murderous connections in Italy that she is dead.

And it's two lives, not just one.

Yep.

If you're Catholic.

So

this happens, and Matt Damon is the one who kind of knew about their relationship.

So he kind of uses that against Dickie, and he's like, but I'll never tell.

So that makes him the number one best friend again.

Yes.

And they go on a little trip together.

They go out in a rowboat.

The movie is now in dark territory.

The world's greatest vacation has been over for a little bit.

And now the shit is hitting the fan.

They have this big fight.

Jude Law calls him boring.

They start to fight on the boat, and Matt Damon kills him with an oar very brutally.

I mean, this brutal.

This scene.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, this is like a movie death that will always stick with me.

Yeah, because they don't do the thing that I think, you know, maybe other movies might do, which is like one hit with the ore and he's dead.

It's like one hit with the ore and there's this look on Matt Damon's face like, oh shit, I overreacted.

Sorry.

And then Jude Law is just

pouring blood from a head wound.

Which, to be honest, that first hit, I think would have killed him anyway.

Yeah, yeah.

It might have been so much scarier.

But he just, he went down fighting.

Yeah, he was, he was big mad about it.

And

yeah, you know, and it's, it's also, you know, in this, it's sort of a crime of passion in the, uh, you know, the real, in the, in the book and in the show, it's sort of planned.

And yeah, you know, I kind of like, okay, so there's a little bit of something I was feeling during the movie.

I feel like in my friendships, I've always been the ultimate third wheel.

Like I tend to hang out with people

that are besties and then I'm the third wheel on the outside.

I've never figured out how to not be the third wheel in my life.

Oh, I'm the same.

And so his you just invite in a fourth and fifth wheel.

That's

what I'm saying.

But it's hard to coordinate.

It's hard to coordinate.

And then you pick a restaurant and then they're like, I can't eat that.

And then it's a whole thing.

Yeah, sure.

Keeping it to three is.

Celiac disease.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But yeah.

And then it was like, so he's with a couple and he's the third wheel.

And then he's learned to be okay with that.

But now you've got Philip Seymour seymour hoffman's character kind of butting him out and now he doesn't belong all over again being the third wheel in situations like that is so fucking uncomfortable yeah and painful that i was like oh he's

yeah that i'm not it's just like there is there is something so painful watching him be the third wheel and not fitting in and then he you know yeah then it becomes the the first wheel yeah the only wheel

he's the squeaky wheel he's killing the other wheels one by one Yep.

He's a unicycle.

He kills Jude Law, and like there's a shot of him spooning the dead body in the boat.

Oh, very saltburn.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, very much so.

Yeah.

And so, yeah, so he goes back, and this is kind of when he starts to like

take on Dickie's identity.

He like moves to this other town and gets an apartment.

And there he meets Kate Blanchett, who we haven't explained yet.

He meets her.

He meets her at the beginning of the movie and says he's Dickie.

So that when she sees him again, she's like, oh, Dickie.

And she's from a rich family too.

Yes, she's great in this.

I mean, you know.

She's just been in every movie forever.

And I've known and didn't realize that.

And I love her mid-Atlantic accent in this.

Oh, Dickie.

Oh, thank you.

Oh, go.

Oh,

can I drag you to the opera tonight?

She's so good in this.

She's so funny.

So she goes to the opera with Kate Blanchett.

The opera starts to, it has events that mirror what's going on in the story.

It starts to make him feel guilty.

They're doing a Hamlet.

And they run into Marge and Peter.

Peter is a friend of Marge's.

I don't think they explicitly say it, but I think he's supposed to kind of represent like

a more out-queer person, like

a person who is kind of living that way as best you could in the 1950s.

And he's kind of like an aspirational figure for Matt Damon.

He also

is a conductor at the symphony.

So they kind of like,

so Matt Damon kind of does this, does this switcheroo thing where everybody meets each other and it kind of like explains his story.

Very ingenious.

He kind of tells them all to meet at the same place and everyone is, everybody like supports his lie, basically.

But then

it's beautiful.

Like that, the whole sequence in which he, because it's like, there is a lot of tension when he, when he sees Marge, because Kate Blanchett is just like, you know, about to show up too.

And he's like, he has to be Tom with Marge, and he has to be Dickie with Kate.

And

he gets them to all think they just missed Dickie.

Yeah.

And it is like, it's, it's, he engineers it beautifully.

And it's, there's so much tension.

And you feel so relieved when he pulls it off.

Well, again, you, you love him.

I know, but I really feel like it's one of those backed into a corner things that he just goes, okay, I've got to do this, this, and this.

I'm just going with it.

But he's also wearing Dickie's fucking ring.

Yeah.

That it's like this ring that Dickie said he would never take off because Gwyneth Paltrow's character bought it for him.

And why the fuck is he wearing it in public?

I think it's really insane.

Like of all of his decisions making stuff of manipulation and being scared and backed into a corner, why the fuck would you wear this ring?

Why?

His method.

He's method with his ring.

He just likes that ring, I think.

And I get that.

I love jewelry too.

Yeah.

So, yeah.

So he, uh, so, so, you know, he's kind of like gotten everybody off his tail, um, except Philip Seymour Hoffman comes in and figures it out.

And that's the start of his undoing.

And we're going to talk about that more when we come back.

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I'm Jordan Morris.

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We're talking about the talented Mr.

Ripley.

So he's backed into a corner.

He thinks he kind of figures it out.

And then Philip Seymour Hoffman comes over.

And this fucking, he's in like three scenes in this movie, and they're all fucking awesome.

Yeah.

He kind of like knows what's going on, and he's just like annoyingly tapping one key on his piano.

It's so good.

Just being a fucking annoying dick.

Because he shows up to his apartment and he's looking for Dickie.

Right.

And

sees Tom instead.

And, you know, Tom is making up excuses for, oh, Dickie's out and whatnot.

Well, the landlord told him that Dickie is in the room.

Well, right.

Well, eventually he does learn that.

And then he, but before he does, he's just walking around the room.

He's looking at Tom, living it up in luxury.

And he just knows.

He can tell.

He's like, you are

a leech.

You do not come from like a well-bred family.

And it's like, he's able to like

communicate all that through just these looks that he gives him, these like grimaces and like just kind of like giving him these eyes like, ew, do you even go here?

And it's, it's just, it's an incredible face acting job that he does throughout.

And he's such a dick.

Like he's, he's just, he likes pushing his buttons.

Yeah.

This movie has so much good, like, under-the-surface acting.

Like, it's all about what people are not saying and, like, what they're thinking, and what they're saying when they're, what they're, you know, thinking when they're saying one thing and they're thinking something else.

Yeah.

And I think everyone in this movie is, like, fucking great at that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So he kills Philip Seymour Hoffman with a statue,

like, plants his, you know, plants his body in a car and like drives it, uh, you know, drives it into the, into the forest.

He does a classic weekend at Bernie's.

Oh, he's just.

He does a weekend at the bottom.

He's just really drunk.

He's she's really drunk.

And that scene in the TV show is protracted to slapstick levels.

The TV show, each murder is like a Charlie Chaplin routine.

I can't.

Everything fucking goes wrong.

It's great.

Yeah, you'll totally love it.

Yeah, so this is kind of the end of his undoing.

There's a private eye on his tail.

There's like a French policeman.

And Gwyneth Paltrow totally knows.

She goes over to his apartment.

She knows she's accusing him.

She sees the fucking ring thing, the dumbest thing in history.

And there's a shot of him.

He's in the bathroom, and she kind of walks in on him on the bath.

And he's like, hold on, let me get my stuff together and then I'll explain everything with the ring.

There's a scene of him going around in the bathroom looking for something to kill her with.

Yes.

What can I kill her with?

I already used the statue.

Oh, God.

Just like looking at it.

He's like breaking glass and stuff.

Looking for a murder.

He's whittling some sticks.

Maybe

toothbrush.

Can I?

I don't know.

So she gets out of it alive.

It turns out Dickie's dad hired an American PI, played by Philip Baker Hall.

We get one more of that guy from that thing.

Oh, yeah.

All the P.P.

Anderson movies.

Just a great cop, great priest.

Philip Baker Hall.

And they all think that Marge is hysterical, and his dad has kind of explained it away.

And it looks like everything worked out for old fucking Tom Ripley.

And he goes off with

Peter.

It's not like

they don't say explicitly that they're kind of like together, but they have a very like flirty,

you know, they have a very like flirty energy and they're staying in the same room and stuff.

I think it's very heavily implied

that they are in love in a romantic relationship.

I have one question, though.

Yes.

Yes.

Does Peter know everything?

Because it felt like

Tom Ripley's character was implying a bunch of things by saying, I have all this darkness in the basement of my mind, and I just want to open it up and show someone.

So I guess to me, I thought that he had told Peter everything and Peter was just fine with it.

I don't think so.

I think that the big thing that he had told Peter

is you know the fact that they are that he's gay and that you know so is so is peter and peter's like i'm fine with he doesn't have to be he can be a more more honest version of himself do you think that he was implying that him and uh

greenleaf were lovers oh yeah i think so i think he's doing that in order to kind of um like

you know, shoo away any lingering questions about what happened there.

Okay.

I think it's his way of trying to explain it away.

He can't be completely honest with him, but he can at the very least be like, I'm gay.

And, you know, Peter is going to be like, oh, so that's what this is.

And the movie kind of does that, where it's just like, oh, you know, that's why he keeps,

you know, having so many identities is that he's a closeted person, which is like, okay, but it's a little bit, it's a little problematic

because the implication that like, well, you know, they're capable of anything when they're in the closet you know they just lie and cheat and murder it's like well no he's a con man yeah is trying to i think other people he's just addicted to the drama is like what i think he's also a messy bitch just a messy yeah messy

messy guy yeah yes um so yeah he so they're they're like aboard this ship you think he got away with it but fucking Kate Blanche is there.

It's going to ruin everything.

And then we get the last scene of the movie.

It's Peter kind of laying on his back, and he's like, Tell me something good about Tom Ripley.

And he's just saying all these nice things about him.

And then

it's pans away, and you kind of hear him strangling Peter.

And you just hear it.

And then you see Matt Damon coming back from...

probably what was throwing him overboard.

Yeah.

And that is the last fucking shot of this devastating movie.

That was such a fucked ending.

Like, I

yeah.

It is, it's so, and, like, while he's strangling Peter, who's the love of his life at this point, you know, to death, he's also crying.

But he has to cry quietly because he is murdering a guy.

And also, you know, that the

drama doesn't end because now his identity is the murderer that he pinned all the things on.

So he's going to have to spend the rest of his life being a guy that he blamed for all the murders that he actually committed.

It's like, oh, God, the drama.

Yeah, he's a messy bitch.

He loves drama.

Messy bitch.

Yeah.

It is, it's so like, and it's so funny because like watching this movie now as, you know, maybe someone who's seen it a bunch of times and has read the book and watched the other show,

I feel like like a little embarrassed at the way I reacted to when Kate Blanchett showed up.

Because the first time I saw it, I was like, God, you fucking bitch, you just show up and ruin

everything.

God damn it.

This is why women, like it was like, very, I'm more mad at her for just existing.

Make him watch a boring opera.

Yeah, exactly.

Well, because this tension and the stress of will he figure this out?

Will he figure this out is so high that anytime you're like, your butt cheeks are finally ready to relax.

Yes.

Then Kate Blanchette shows up.

She shows up

everything.

And it's like, God damn it.

Like, you know, you're just like,

how can't he just have a nice vacation?

You just end up.

You just want to sing Italian jazz.

He just wants to sing

Americano.

Americano.

Just let him.

God damn it.

And he also has all the money from,

like, you know,

Greenleaf's father left him like, what, all of the

comical how much he gets away with it.

He's like, not only are we closing the investigation, I'm giving you a bunch of money.

It's like.

He should have just left Italy a long time ago.

Oh, I know.

That's my biggest thing with him in this movie.

I'm just like, just leave.

Leave.

But he goes to France.

He's got the money, though, which is great.

But the whole movie reminded me that I have to get a real ID.

Yeah, sure.

Yeah.

If you want to get on a plane,

God damn it.

And that this guy's just like cavorting around with a bunch of different passports that don't.

Yeah, you can just glue someone else's picture in there.

It's fine.

Go to a bank, ask someone for their money.

Exactly.

And now they got to scan my face with like AI at the airport.

We'll never be able to do multiple murders and switch identities again.

That's bullshit.

Well, yeah, that is the talented Mr.

Ripley.

We're going to rank it, but first we should talk about who we are the most sexually attracted to.

It's our segment, Hunk Watch.

It's Hunk Watch.

I think we're kind of all on the same page here.

I want to do a brief shout out to Kate Blanchett and her opera outfit.

Oh, my God.

Stunner.

Emily, do you want to start this conversation?

Oh, yeah.

It's Philip Seymour Hoffman.

All the way.

Total hunk.

I want to run my hands through that perfect blonde hair.

Yes.

There's this pretty bit when Matt Damon meets Kate Blanchett and they're talking about his character.

I think Freddy is his name, Freddy.

Freddie, that's right.

And there's this moment where Matt Damon is like, oh, I know Freddy.

And she's like, everybody knows Freddy.

In this way, where you're like, they've fucked.

Yeah.

Absolutely fucked.

And you believe it.

You buy it.

Yeah.

Because it's like, everybody's fucked this guy.

You know, just the mat.

And you're right.

It's the confidence.

It's like the swagger.

It's like the weird energy.

Yeah.

He's, he's, I mean, he's.

he knows how to read people.

I think that charismatic people who just kind of know how to, you know, dress you down and stuff, it's like, it's hot.

It just is hot.

But yeah, and I loved his like slight sunburn.

I don't know.

Yep.

Yeah.

Love it.

Love it.

You know, Jen blossoms all the time.

He's always kind of drunk.

Yeah.

Well, yeah.

Matt, did you have a different opinion?

No, it was the same one.

Freddie.

Freddie, baby.

Freddy.

Freddie Miles.

Freddie Miles.

He's just, it's a great character played by a terrific actor.

Yes.

We miss you.

We miss you.

He's the best.

They say now that Jesse Plemons is the new Philip Seymour Hoffman.

I could definitely see that.

See Plemons pops up in something.

Oh, yeah.

He's great.

But I just,

I think the only comparison is ginger-esque

looks.

I think you're right.

I think a lot of it is just sort of, you know, ginger stereotyping.

Yeah, but they do uneasy kind of like

characters that make you like they both do similar stuff, but I mean, come on, yeah, nothing better than Philip.

PSH, all the way.

That's right.

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So we're going to rank talented Mr.

Ripley on a scale of one to ten Super Lab commercials.

Emily, since you haven't seen this before, I am dying to know what you thought of it overall

um it stressed the hell out of me um

which i guess isn't isn't really a qualifier for if a movie is good or not but we rank things based on like how we feel about the movie and not about quality at least that's how i feel is it like

would i watch it again kind of thing um i don't want to watch that again but i could acknowledge that it it was a masterful movie i'm gonna give it an eight the performances were amazing it was gorgeous to look at, but it stressed me the fuck out.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'll go.

And then, Matt, since you've consumed the most Ripley stuff, you can kind of put the nail in the coffin here.

Yeah, I love this movie.

I think for me, it is a nine.

Yeah, I love Tom Ripley.

I think he's such a great character.

I want him to be in the Avengers.

Can Tom Ripley join the Avengers?

We need someone to kill Dr.

Doom and impersonate him.

Steal his identity.

Yeah.

Starts signing all of Dr.

Doom's checks.

Yeah.

His dad shows up.

Oh, that's great.

So, yeah.

And I think, you know, we alluded to this.

Obviously,

it is a novel from a different time and a movie from a different time.

So obviously, we have this like...

villainous, murderous, queer character.

It's the psycho problem.

And, you know, that stuff is kind of like outdated.

But I think if you can kind of think about this as a movie from another time, it is so, so good.

And I think, you know, overall, it is, you know, it is saying something about how important it is to be yourself.

So, yeah, I love this movie.

And, yeah, it's the first part is the greatest vacation you've ever been on.

And then the second part is the most horrific nightmare you've ever been in.

I love that it does both.

And, yeah,

this is a favorite of mine.

I'm going to give it a nine.

Matt, what do you think?

I'm going to give this

right between both of you guys.

I'm going to go an 8.5.

I think it is,

it's one of my favorite movies.

It was a pleasure to re-watch and talk about.

And yeah, the faults

still stand.

I think

it's doing its best with the material, but it does it in a weird way.

But I still

love it.

So yeah, it's just a great...

You know what?

If you haven't seen this movie, go watch it.

Then go watch the Netflix series.

Then go read the book.

And then go to YouTube and look up Ripley fan theories.

And then read some fan fiction.

I haven't done that faster.

And just, there's a whole world of Ripley fans.

That sounds fun as hell.

I'm definitely going to do that.

Also, then watch Saltburn.

Then watch Saltburn.

Then watch Ripley's Believe It or Not.

It's not related, but it's just kind of like something hosted by the great Dean Kane.

Dean Kane is wonderful.

Doing great stuff.

Great and everything.

I haven't checked on him on Twitter.

I'm sure he's great.

He's a man who looks like he was carved out of cheddar cheese.

That's right.

He and Kevin Sorbo on a charcuterie plate sounds delicious.

Yeah.

Jam, couple almonds.

Yummers.

Yeah,

that's the talent in Mr.

Ripley.

We'll do a couple personal plugs.

Emily, you got anything?

Please go onto mythicalsociety.com.

It's a mythical entertainment's site that is for members only.

I have a show on there called Emily.

Have you seen this?

If you want to become a member on there and watch the show, that would be great.

All of us do things on there.

Matt and I have these characters that are goth characters that have a wedding special and a baby shower.

And Jordan is on there quite a bit doing various things.

It would mean a lot to me, but if you have to pick one, then pick pick Max Fun and then tell them how good we are.

You know,

right.

Yeah.

Matt, you got anything?

Yes.

Once again, it's quickly approaching May 7th,

Wednesday, May 7th, Cobbs Comedy Club in San Francisco, 7.30.

Myself and my wife, get tickets now.

All right.

And if you are listening to this, the week it comes out,

April 30th, you can get your hands on Godzilla versus Los Angeles, a comics anthology about Godzilla destroying LA.

All of the money goes to Wildfire Relief.

I've got a story in there with a great artist named Nicole Goh.

And yeah, it was a super fun project.

As you know, if you listen to the show,

I love Godzilla.

We love Godzilla.

So getting to do a Godzilla thing.

Thrill of a lifetime.

Please pick up that comic at your local comic book store.

And if you're in California on April 30th, you can come get a copy signed at Collector's Paradise in North Hollywood.

You can see me at Litfest in the Dina at Pasadena Presbyterian Church on May 2nd, 6.30 to 7.30.

I'll be there with Elliot Kalen from the Flop House.

So, another Max Fun pal there at Litfest in the Dina.

On May 3rd, my birthday, I'll be at Things from Another World, Universal City Walk, 2 to 4 p.m.

And on May 10th, I will be at Mission Comics in San Francisco.

Come get some books signed, and if you can't do that, get Godzilla vs.

LA at a comic bookstore near you.

Okay,

that's it.

Tune in next week when our movie will be

The Land Before Time.

Maximum Fun, a worker-owned network of artists-owned shows.

Supported directly by you.