Guys: Episode 111 - Auction Guys with Luke Taylor

Whoops, I dropped my challenge coin. Hey, everyone, Chris here, just letting you know that the geysery is open again today at 12 o'clock p.m.
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So head on over and do it. Really have to say the last part.
All right.

They went last time. These things flew off the shelf.
So get there in there quick and buy one fast. They will not be on, they might not be on sale all night long.

I just don't think it

don't think it works.

Welcome to guys a podcast about guys. I am Brian, and with me is a buyer,

Chris James. Hi, Chris.
Wait, they hate the buyers.

Oh, do they?

What aren't they? Well, wait a minute. They also had the buyers hate the sellers.
It's not a one-way street. It's a war.
I see.

I thought the community hated the buyers.

They do. They do.
I mean, you'll be reading,

I'll be reading through. I was reading through stuff, and it'll be like typical seller behavior.
Or like,

typical buyer it's class class warfare type

sure it's so fun these people are very funny and and we're gonna do auctioneers we're gonna do people who buy stuff and sell stuff so it's gonna be fun and we have as our guest this week luke taylor hi luke hey guys happy to be here did you like my chant oh what your chant what do you mean

like

hey we got a bun over here

we're gonna learn that later We're going to learn how to do that. Are you going to learn it later? Are you going to learn it later?

I already know it. To be honest, I thought that was a vocal tick, Brian, but I'm glad to know that it's auctioning.
I already know it.

You sort of know it. I already know how to do it.
The problem was you seem to give up on it in the middle. So you're like, yeah, yeah.

And then you just sort of like, hey, we got a one. I'm like,

it's funny. They are just counting.
Yeah. Like, that's what I found out.
And then they have one-liners, Chris. You might, you know, be able to help out with a couple of one-liners.

There's just like a few that, like, what they do is they're counting, right?

And pointing at people. And then they're doing little jokes in there.
You didn't know they were counting that much. They're not counting, just to be clear.
They're saying the amount.

So they're not like counting one, two, three, four, five.

They're saying how much, they're saying the amount that it has now gone up to in the auction.

my understanding okay so you didn't do a lot of research on this um but yeah they're saying numbers definitely oh we got a one and a two and a three and a four and a five seven eight nine ten eleven twelve that's what they're doing

i just i think this is a good time to say and i you know chris we've maybe met a little bit on stream i've never met brian i asked him what kind of auction years it was and i just thought this was a very funny message for someone to send to someone you don't know brian said uh

i said what kind of auction guys are we talking about? Like, guys obsessed with eBay or the thing where the auction year goes 23, 24, 26.

And Brian said, Both guys, I haven't started working on the episode, so I'm not totally sure what it will be. My process is just to say, we're going to do this and then figure it out.

And I just, that's right.

Listen, man, I love to receive that because I was like, great, pressure is off me. I don't need to do any research, but I appreciate the honesty.

Yeah, you definitely, the pressure is off because, yeah, when you realize, when you're like, oh, they're not prepared for this either, then it's like, who gives?

How could you possibly be expected to care about it? Listen, we're doing a live show coming up. Shout out to people who got tickets.
Oh, it's sold out. We don't need to talk about that.

But thank you. Never again.

Congrats.

Brian literally doesn't want to talk about it. But I'm just saying that Brian.

He refused to

refuse to prepare for the live show at all. He would get mad.

I would like try to prepare and he would like change the subject in like a really comical, like from a movie kind of way, but he was being serious, you know? And he had like I hate talking about work.

He just wouldn't plan for it. And we did get some stuff together.
Well, because I mean, I did get the audio of your first

ever appearance on radio. I think that was part of it, but you did, you did bring it.
You definitely, I'm just saying some preparation ended up going into it, but yet.

But I, um, yeah, so I, I, I, I'm hopeful that on this live show that we do a little bit of preparation. It's funny.

I was about to text you, Chris, to put your mind at ease and say, hey, when I'm in California, I'll spend some time putting posts together for the live show. Yeah.

But then I was like, maybe it's funnier if he doesn't think I'm working on it

at all. Yeah, I mean, I,

it's funny too, because then you could get in a situation where Chris does the same thing and then you guys have both done the same work. And then so

that's not ever going to be an issue. I'll tell you what.
It's never going to be an issue at this podcast. Oh, no, we've both done the work.
Oh, no, no, no.

No, we've worked too hard on this. Oh, my goodness.
Oh, we need to reel back. We need to pull back on how much work we're doing.

I, yeah,

I have a couple ideas of like fun things that we could do. They're just general ideas.
You know what I mean? Like, hey, it would be fun. I'm going to do this.

Probably walk around the whole room and show people the 300 ring.

That's one of the things I've love. It's like a waste of time.

We're going to show each and every person. We're going to walk up to each person and say, that's from bowling a 300, my man.
Yeah. And they're going to be like, congratulations.

Next person, that's going to burn probably 45 minutes. You say, my man, no matter what, the gen, I love saying, my man.
Okay, let's get to this. So the first thing I did was I went to Facebook.

Well, okay. The first thing I did was go to

r slash eBay, and I didn't like what I was getting. So I went to Facebook.
First thing when you search auctions comes up, pristine auctions. Okay,

that's

like a proper old school auction company. Yeah, and I'll show you what they're selling so you guys can see it.
Okay.

Because the comments on this are what we're going to read.

Pristine auctions,

ostensibly a non-political

company, are auctioning off Make America Great Again hats signed by Donald Trump with a certificate of authenticity now we're not a political podcast at all i am actually i'm one of the prominent leftists of the past 15 years so yeah i know

yeah

i mean not i i guess i i don't think so really but but he um he it's a we have it we're not allowed to talk about politics we want to but we're not allowed to yet I do and so anyway anyway the first review is like

Chad Sicarelli goes,

hey, with almost 14 hours left, and this hat currently has a bid of $944,

people are insane, which I agree. I mean, well, what's the hat?

Oh, that one, the one besides Donald Trump.

It's got an autograph of the president, you know.

It feels like that'd be an easy autograph to get, to tell you the truth. Yeah, I guess.
Do you think 900 is low, though?

No, I think it's insanely high because the way I feel is you could probably mail the president a hat and he would sign it and mail it back.

I mean, maybe he wouldn't sign it, but it would be basically the same thing as him signing it. He could have somebody else do it, you know.

This is why we can't talk about it because it's just the disrespect for the office. And I, and it's not a political thing either, but it's like the idea that he would have time to do that.

I mean, well, you can disagree with him, but he's he's obviously too busy just designing a hat. It's a listen, it's it's got it, he's got a lot.

He can't, if every person, think about how many people send him hats. It's got to be in the thousands, you know? But some, it's the same thing.

So, Carl replies and goes, yeah, but it's lined with Cheeto dust. Increases the value.

No, dude, he cannot say that. That increases the value, though.
I would think so.

It's Trump Cheeto dust.

That's weird.

It was a funny joke that Cheeto does. I get it, definitely.
But it's like, well, I would think that.

Next joke, Chris. Oh, sorry.
Okay, yeah. No one ain't.
Travis goes, no, it's lined with hard work, something you don't know about, soy boy.

Oh, is that a joke? That was a good joke, lined with hard work. It has hard work inside.
I always forget, by the way, that I, that

more people listen to this podcast and other stuff that I've done.

And when I say stuff like, hey, we're not allowed to talk about politics on here, there's like some people who are like, why aren't they allowed to talk about politics?

So, just to be clear, that was a joke. We're allowed to talk about politics.
We're just terrified too. We don't want to alienate anyone.
We're terrified of. We don't even

mind.

Okay. I want to alienate the president.

That's a political act

that I'm doing. You don't want him to listen? He's like the most powerful podcast listener.

Yeah, then, you know, maybe he can listen, but hey, fuck you, Trump. That's the most brave thing I've done in like

years now. Toby goes, I was going to bid on this, but decided my thousand would be better spent on a dozen eggs.

Okay, so that I like that one more because the other two are jokes that it is because this was from like yesterday, you said, right?

Yes, this is from yesterday or the day before one on two.

It's, I think it's awesome that two people are still saying like Cheeto dust and they're responding to that with soy boy, something fully from now a decade ago. Yeah, 2006.

Like true, like truly, like, it's like, that is not something I'm ever thinking about. But then we've got the eggs.
So then Toby's bringing into the present.

And that's the kind of humor I want to see in the auction comments. I think think the next one's the kind of humor I want to see.
Keith says, I'll buy it just to take a dump in it. No, Keith! Keith.

Come on, man. This is why you guys, can you let me know when we're off the politics so I can unmute myself? I just cannot be a part of this conversation.

This guy goes, kind of like our last administration did to our country. And then Derek respies and goes, you couldn't afford it.
It is expensive.

So if you were going to buy it to take a crap in it, you could never afford it. Yeah.

This guy, oh, this is funny, and I don't think either one of you guys are gonna get it. He goes, uh, Coyle says, uh, buy a hat like that, you should get a free bowl of soup.

Looks good on you, though, Rodney Dangerfield.

Oh, yeah, no, I don't get that.

It's a line from Zach,

yeah, it's a line from Caddy Shack. Caddyshack, Caddyshack's from when's that from like 2011? That's such an old movie.
Well, the reboot's from 2011. I think it's from 2011.
Look it up.

What when did Caddyshack come out?

80, 1980. Hey.
Oh, okay.

That's not too long ago. It's a classic.
And then before I was alive. 45 years ago.
And then Rob Leese, Rob does have a good point here. I like this point.
And this is our final post, political post.

He goes, so I guess I'll be able to buy more stuff at better pricing once all the liberal crybabies stop buying. Now, that's an auction.

I don't think I get that. He's saying the liberals in the comments mostly were like, I'll never buy from pristine auctions ever again.
Oh, okay. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.

And he's like, oh, this is great

because everything will be cheaper because the libs aren't buying. And there's just less people bidding.
So, you know, it does stand to reason. They probably will be less expensive.

It's probably better for him. Yeah.

Here's one from a seller.

And this is from R slash eBay and goes, this one made me laugh. And it's a screenshot of a direct message that he got on eBay.
It says, Hi, thank you for your offer.

I am a collector of all things Dodge Caravan.

Can I just ask if your home/slash facility is smoke-free and verify, like I do with everyone else I buy from, that there are no occult connections such as witchcraft in the home, just for safety's sake, so there can be no spells.

Thank you.

You guys want to buy a witchcraft dodge caravan?

I mean,

I feel like if I feel like, um,

yeah, like, I guess if you're into witchcraft and stuff like that and you believe in that kind of stuff, then it would make sense if you're acquiring things.

You want to get a little bit of a, but it's like, are you ever going to get a straight answer on that?

Is anyone going to be like, oh, yes, it has witchcraft?

I put a shit ton of spells on this Dodge caravan before I sold it to you. If the caravan has witch stuff on it,

it most likely means the person you're buying it from is a witch. Can I say say it's a die-cast one, Chris? It's not

an actual Dodge caravan. Okay.

Oh, it's a Hot Wheel? Yes.

Can you imagine being an adult and playing with some kind of a toy like that? Oh, yeah, that's pathetic stuff. Why is he obsessed with the Dodge caravan?

Like, I was, I looked up, because I was like, I was pretty sure I knew what it looked like, but it just is a very... I mean, it looks like a minivan.
Is that a scarcity strange car?

It is a strange car to be like a huge fan of. Like, there are no models that look cool.
There's not, they all look exactly the same. Do you think this person might be a little bit random?

This person might be a little bit like, oh my God, can you imagine if I was like really into a Dodge caravan? You know, like, that would be so fucking weird.

They're random, but they're extremely scared of witches and spells. They're like, random XD, but if you curse me, bro, I'm coming for you.
Well, yeah, they've got priority.

And they are just understanding. I mean, listen, listen if you believed in witches and the occult

i mean i don't i'm thankful i don't because if you did it would be you'd be scared of it all the time you would think it's always you know like it's notoriously fucking using subterfuge and things like that all the time if you okay but if you were the owner of this diecast dodge caravan and you were a witch and you were trying to sell things with spells i mean wouldn't your first thing you would be like no man of course there's no spells on it.

Exactly, yeah, that's why it's that's why it is pointless to ask. Yeah, if anything, it would make you put more spells on it, yeah.

Like, in what situation would the person admit to there being spells on it? I just, yeah, I think they might be joking around too, possibly. You know, you want to hear this riff? I got a riff.

Oh, you guys love a riff.

Now, you gotta let me get through, and maybe you won't get this, and maybe you will, but here we go. Uh, the first guy goes, OP didn't deny the occurrence of Santeria in their home.

Suspicious, sarcastic. It lets you know it's sarcastic, right?

This next guy goes, there isn't, nor do I have a crystal ball. And if I had a million dollars, I'd probably spend it all.

The next guy replies, I hope you find that Heina and that Sancho that she's found. Oh, no, I hate it.

And then the next guy replies and goes, it's all fun and games until you find the tied chicken feet on a sidewalk near your home like I did. Fuck the riff up completely.

Yeah, has no idea that they're doing a sublime thing. It's like, well, these guys really are finally i found my guys who understand the importance of how scary santeria is

that is that is my

at least i do appreciate brian saying you gotta let us get through it that's the sort of no chris please don't interrupt me if you do and let me say the whole thing i had to say and i and you knew that that i was gonna because even when you said that i still couldn't stop myself i still got so mad when the other guy came in and started fitting that's one of my least favorite things when someone's doing like

here's some fucking lyrics to a thing, you know, like, here's my joke, the lyrics.

And then this person's just like, oh, I'll pick that up where you left off, you know, and just like does the end of the song.

Like, well, because it leaves OP, you know, it leaves OP just sort of hanging there, like, okay, that's fun, guys, but now I have no idea if this Dodge Caravan actually has Santeria and you guys are having your laugh.

Yeah, I'm sure. Oh, good.
You guys are dancing. Meanwhile, I'm worried about my family's safety.

I love the line of,

I loved seeing it die like it did. Like, there's something so

funny to me about some guys doing a riff. Yeah.
And then one guy just pops in with something that doesn't make any sense and isn't funny at all.

And then everyone just kind of, you know, like, anyways, yeah. Sorry.

I got to use some stuff I got to do there. And everyone just kind of walks off.
Yeah, that is somebody. It's a really funny thing to do

to see if you could go.

I bet you people do it, I'm sure, but you know, you go into those threads and just where people are really cooking, you know, they're really going wild, and you just see if you could just fucking end it, you know, without being like, you know, without being like hate, but like, without being like, you know, just like see if you can end it by just being someone making everyone feel like so shitty that they don't want to be.

It would be funny if you were the improv guy that always popped in and you told a joke

it was just a joke that it very much shows that you have no idea what's going on oh yeah it really grinds the energy to a screeching halt and makes everyone go oh cool man yeah yeah you're right you're right though brian like the added fucking thing of it just being like oh he doesn't get it like do we tell him he doesn't get it or do we just go start another one you know like that is so good of like he doesn't know that they're lyrics you know like

The only thing funnier would be the guy responding and then explaining it to him, be like, oh, actually, this is a line from a Sublime song and then like linking the song and being like, so sorry about that confusion.

Oh, yeah. That's, I mean, that's the, listen, that's the, the honorable thing to do that you don't see a lot of online.
And it's like, when I see that, honestly, I take a screenshot of it. I post it.

That's a hero. I say more of this, please.
That's a hero. 2025, please.

And it would have been, he got the, the other funny thing about it is he got the best lyric, too.

Because he gets to say, I'd pop a cap and Sancho and I'd slap her down or whatever. That's the fucking line, dude.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And he's just like, he could have related that, like, hey, I might have to pop a cap and Sancho, but seriously, guys, if there's spells on this Dodge Caravan diecast, I'm going to be pissed as shit.

You know, like, he could have related it.

I got

pop a cap and Sancho, and I just hope that,

you know, if Sancho doesn't tell me what's actually going on with this regarding, yeah, that's brilliant, Luke. Yeah.

To loop it back in, that shows like incredible posting prowess to be like, hey, listen, I get it. I see what you're doing, but let's stay on topic.
He did not do that.

And then the guys, yeah, and then that makes the other guys go, okay, well, I can tell you're one of us. So yes, I'll give you the information you need.
Yeah, totally.

They're like literal gatekeepers. They're sitting there with the information.
They have it. They have it in real time.

Well, they don't want to give it it to you unless you know the end to that sublime song. If you don't know the end to it, do you deserve the information?

I bet you 70%

of people that exist know that

next line from that sublime song. Yeah, it was a popular song.
Definitely, it depends on your generation, I would say.

You know, probably some younger people might not, and some real older people, but certainly people in our generation do. Yeah.
Well, let's get some solid range of ages here.

We all, I mean, what do you say, Santeria? I mean, I'm, that's the only thing I'm thinking of.

Is the song, yeah. It is the song.
Stop playing with scissors. Can you stop playing with scissors, please, Brian?

Brian is, is playing with scissors where he has each of the blades in one different and in like one hand and not sharp.

It'd be worse if you were holding it the other way because now you're you are protect. Okay, so that is where it gets a little

Yeah, he's he's now let's get some serious advice here. Let's let's we got a serious guy goes do not sell to someone like this.

You'll wind up with some crazy negative feedback because buyer quote felt something off with the vehicle. Seller did not disclose.
It's not a vehicle. I think you are.
I think it's a toy. I think

you might be making a mistake there, or you're like calling the toy a vehicle, which is a bit weird. But yeah, that is good advice, I think.
That if somebody is like sort of showing

that they believe in magic or whatever. Showing very clear signs of mental illness.

That you maybe be weary of selling to that person that at any moment they could just decide, oh, well, oh, all of a sudden

I didn't get that raise I wanted. And they look over at the item that you saw

diecast on the caravan.

And it's not because their desk is completely filled with die-castage caravans that the boss think there's something seriously wrong with them. It's because there's a curse on one of them.

It's the one that's like slightly off to the left.

How does it keep moving?

Scott Poodle says, I mean, it's funny, but if he's a buyer, he's a buyer.

Which I like that Adam. Scott Poodle is a listen.
Scott Poodle is a closer. He is about making sales and he doesn't care.
He'll sell to anybody.

Hey, your money, every, you know, your money works just the same. You know, that's the way Scott Poodle sees it.

Well, the next guy goes, as a small business owner and higher-functioning adult, I wouldn't go that far.

If you ask me about occult happenings when I'm trying to sell a used vehicle, you are not serious in my eyes. Then he gets a reply, not even a used vehicle.
It's a die-cast figure for $8.

Yeah, yeah. So there is some people, because I think people are confused because they're like, why would we be discussing a toy in this kind of way?

Settle up spells on the toys. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This must be a real car we're talking about. So some other people do seem to be confused about it.
Yeah. Well, it gun to my head.

If you're, if, if you're like do i care more about if there's a spell on a toy than a car i'm like well i guess if having a spell on my car is going to impact me more on a day-to-day basis than a toy so i can i see where the confusion's coming from yeah it's terrifying to have a spell on your car i mean you're driving that's the way it's not safe

when your car is against you you're in danger at all times yeah well we've seen a lot of movies where toys get

you know turned satanic and only really one with a car you know which one which one's the christine right oh yeah

can you think of another one no uh there's night rider but he's he's just kind of cool right that's just the car yeah right i mean he's just nice yeah there's the toy in the first toy store or there's the car in the first toy story i mean i think he's good but they he is coming alive which they don't know about and toys get up i mean toys will kill you And cars, they're fine.

You know, if you get a car that's possessed, it'll just drive fast. I think cars are, I think cars kill more people than toys.
I don't have the numbers. You don't know that.

Well, but I think I don't have any. If you don't have the numbers, dude, just don't say that.
Okay. Because

I just use logic. You're talking about scholar.
You're spreading misinformation, man. You're going to know.

Chris, I got one for you, buddy. Okay.
This is from our sports cards. Oh, shit.
Oh, okay. This is what I'm talking about.
I love Chris topic.

Yeah. Sports card.
Bought unseen boxes of sports cards at an auction for several hundred dollars. How screwed am I?

Been collecting for a few years, and the other night I was drinking and got careless while perusing. Spent almost $500 on boxes of cards that I'm going to be picking up tomorrow.
So

he does have $500 worth of just random cards. And he says, the first guy says, make an excuse to drink and sort through them.

Sorry, is this R slash alcohol?

Where do we find ourselves here?

But listen, this is not that uncommon.

It's a stupid thing to do. If you're listening and you're like, oh my God, that's like crazy.

It's not that uncommon in collecting sports cards where you'll just get these like mystery boxes or packs or whatever and you'll bid on them and there's like some risk involved.

It's like sort of part of it. I don't engage in that type of stuff.
This guy, our friend Stefan will do that kind of stuff.

You know Stefan, right? I know know him. Yeah, Stefan is, Stefan will often show me a new sports card he got, and I'm like, okay, great.
Yeah, he loves sports cards, Stefan.

Him and I share a love of sports cards, but yeah, he's part of the, you guys are streaming. Luke's a streamer, by the way, the Luke man

on Twitch.

But he,

are you part of the goo crew with the go out? I am. I am.
I'm part of the go. They make you get cards when you're in a goo crew.
They make a Stefan makes you get a bunch of Chris Arnold.

Stefan makes you get a bunch of hockey cards. You can go, that's not really a big thing in my country.
But he's like, no, you need this.

I'm just going to say a name, brian anderson card is that a hockey player he he was he's retired but he's one of the great no he's not he's

i mean he but he probably is because it's such a common name there's no way there's not one brian anderson in at least a minor league i'm sure but not he's not a no

i should or a vetchkin yeah or gets stoned next guy This next guy goes, or gets stoned.

And then he gets a reply from a guy that's like, when I get stoned, I get too paranoid to spend money, which then gets a reply from a guy and goes, that's why Big Pharma is trying to fight legalization.

Just like Joe Logan said.

If you're doing something you're not supposed to be doing and you smoke a joint, you will stop that shit immediately. Oh, so they, wait a second.

So they want you they oh, they don't want you to be stoned because when you get stoned, you see through the bullshit. Like they don't live style.
They live.

It's like you get stoned and you put on the glasses. You'll stop taking your SSRIs because you'll go, this isn't right.
As soon as I smoke a joint, yeah,

you smoke a joint and then yeah, you realize all of the issues with society then at that point.

I think that is kind of true that you make up a bunch of shit in your head about what's wrong with the world around you when you get stoned. Yeah.
I'm normal when I'm stoned. You get chill out.

You get like more like you should kind of chill out. No, I mean I freak out now if I don't

I can't have to take very little amounts because I freak out now. But this guy goes based based on

that's cool that you freak out. I'm actually the same way.
So that's, you know what, I see you, Brian. I feel the same way because, yeah.

I can smoke like fucking 700 joints and I like, I don't, I don't even fucking feel it at that point.

I did dabs all day, and it only made me slow, like it sort of made me go insane, but like it also actually helped me, uh, it helped me. I take dabs every day, and I take dabs from 6 a.m.

I wake up, I take a dab of 95% fucking THC, the highest shit ever, and I don't even get a high dot. I don't don't even want to do it.
I never have felt it once. Boys, it's time to learn.

We're going to learn on this show

to talk like an auctioneer. This is from a guy I found.
His name is Junior Staggs. So he's

a good name for him. Yeah.
Like, that's a perfect auctioneer name. Like, I do think you have to be like, I'm Junior Stags, you know? He's Southern.
He's got to be from the South, right?

With a name like that. I don't know, actually, but he might be southern.
Yeah, you could be right.

Fucking. Okay, let's find.

I can't find the goddamn. This is so embarrassing.
What's happening to you right now, Brian? I'm not able to find the link. I'm looking.
Okay, here we go. Here we go.

This guy is freaking acting like a real. Oh, my God.
I keep fucking things up. He's acting like a real buyer or seller.
I don't know which one of them is. He's a seller because

let's take the working class side. Let's be the buyers and let Brian be the seller.
I'm a seller, baby. Yeah.
We're we're buying this bullshit. You know what I mean? All right, we are here.

Sorry, Chris, that's political. We are all set here.
Get ready. We're going to learn from junior stags.
Maybe we'll even try a little bit out.

So you want to learn to talk like an auctioneer. Oh, he kind of slid in there.
Oh, that's cool. He was already doing it.
Like, hey, better, better, better, better. Hey, better, better, better.

It's a fun. And this is why I like this.
Here he goes. Let's start this thing over again, this time with the numbers.
This is going to be learning to talk like an auctioneer, part one.

So while most young auctioneers just want to talk fast, they're missing the basic fundamental, and that's the numbers. Let's work on that real quick.

And for the purpose of these lessons, we're going to do one to 10 because I believe that's why I thought they counted.

I mean,

those are the numbers. Those are like the numbers, you know.
So I got checked.

You need those to get to anything else. Brian, do you listen to this? Were you just trying to play Coy? You didn't know.
He's definitely from the South.

I didn't know. I forgot what he sounded like.
I just remember him saying we got the numbers. And that's why I came in saying they say numbers, if I'm being honest.

I may not have been paying good attention to him at the time, but here we go. If you can do one to 10, you can do any number.

Okay, so there you go. If you can do one to 10, you can literally do any number.
Well, that's got, yeah, because you don't, yeah, like

instead of 20, you can do 2-0. 2-0.

You can 2-0-1-0-1-1-0-0-0-0-0-0.

Hey, one-five-one-five-six dots.

What about a Googleplex? Isn't that a number? Googleplex? Um, okay, well, now

you might get to that, so just you know,

you might get it. Just let's let him cook a little bit.

Here we go, boys.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

One, two, three, four. We needed to know the numbers before he got to it.
Listen, you guys at home might be laughing. This is helpful for me personally.

I don't know the numbers. Well, you guys know I can't.
Everyone knows I can't read. And so the numbers, I know most of them, I would say.
Right. I know.

I know most of them.

You guys lost on eight. I know.
I mean, that's good.

Yeah. Well,

sorry, what do you mean? Like a dinner?

oh, yeah. Oh, that's.

Right. That's that's exactly the whole thing is you always think when he says eight, you're talking about he's talking about eating food.
That's like you're like, wait a minute, what?

Oh, yeah,

I love the idea of a guy pretending he knows the numbers and somebody says eight and he says what like dinner

uh what you do if I was saying eight or cracker nine ten oh no man I fixed it up again

are you taking a break here

or five six seven eight nine ten now let's double punch. 1, 1, 2, 2, 3, 3, 4, 4, 5, 5, 6, 6, 7, 7, 8, 8, 9, 9, 10, 10.
Let's do it again. 1, 1, 2, 2, 3, 3, 4, 4, 5, 5, 6, 6, 7, 7, 8, 8, 9, 9, 10, 10.

So just remember, in order to have that smooth rhythmic chant, we've got to start with the foundation, and that's the numbers.

Thank you, buddy. That's the end of the video.
He just gave us the numbers.

He told us the numbers. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
He does have some other videos. My name is Junior Stat.

Do you guys think he sounds like when he's doing normal voice, it almost sounds like his auctioneer voice is his real voice and he's slowing it down for us?

Like he has this cadence where he's just like, yes, and then I will tell you exactly how to speak. Like it feels like he's holding back for us.

I would imagine it's hard for him to, like, he, when you really become a hardcore auctioneer, that it's hard to like, it's so much cooler talking that way that you would always always want to do it.

And you could talk to your friends, it's like a secret language. You're like, hey,

it's like Boomhauer talk, but everyone understands it. Hey, can you tell your wife that I was with your wife?

Hey, let me down. Let me ask you your wife when we're swinging.
Hey, tell your wife that I was with you and that we were hanging out there. Let me know.
Wife's going to call you.

You know, like you got all this like nasty shit going on. Well, even talk when everyone's there.
I also have as a little thing, a world champion. Whoa.
Because they do compete. Yeah.

And this is like kind of like Toastmasters but something that I look up to

so like this is like Toastmasters where there's a world champion but I'm like actually that's kind of cool what they're doing yeah the the the bulls are there so they're auctioning off bulls

yeah okay or single guys sometimes they auction off single guys but they don't go for very much money you know yeah you're gonna get a lot more for a bull here we go this is what a world champion sounds like everybody

they've had all

This guy's good. He bulged his eyes out at the beginning in a way that was like, listen, I don't want to call somebody out for being on PEDs or whatever.

I don't know what a PED would be. And I would imagine

speed or cocaine or something like that. Even just a lot of Adderall.
I mean, you'd get fucking good at this shit.

Yeah, and he just sort of gave me a bit of a vibe of somebody who might be using performance enhancers, but I would never listen.

That's just my speculation. I have no, you know,

PEDs.

Well, let's let him finish.

Oh, he's good.

It's beautiful. I mean, it really does sound very beautiful.
Like, it is very pleasing to listen to, and I did not expect that. I thought it was going to be like, hey,

you know, I thought it was going to be sort of guttural, but in fact,

it's quite rhythmic. I want it.
Well, I have a nine-year-old kid doing it, too, if you want to goof on a nine-year-old. Yeah,

own his ass.

I wanted what Luke was describing there. I wanted it to be more like,

you know, like,

you want it to be Boomhauer speak. It seems,

I wanted it to be Boomauer.

How come Dale and fucking, you know, Hank and Bill aren't there as well? Let's just see what they're up to. And it's Texas.

So that actually

missed that show a lot.

You see Texans and you're like, I wish the crew was there

to explain this to me as a lib.

Let me,

here, here we got some reviews. Let's go to some reviews.
Christie's Auction House, very famous auction house. We all know Christie's, right? Where is it located? New York.
Christie's, New York.

Oh, the Christie's in New York. Yes.
You know it. It's the one where they sell like John Lennon's art and stuff like that.
It's like the famous one. Yeah.

So

this guy, Scott, gave it one star. Uh-oh.
What the hell? This is the famous one.

He goes, every exchange with this group included a seemingly carefully crafted white lie that left the customer holding a relatively empty bag when compared to the pile of cash forked over to acquire it.

Now, this is like Chris's Yelp guy that I found recently

that reviews radio stations and talks like he's like Ernest Hemming.

Speaking like, like, oh, like

sort of believing in the moment that they're writing for like Vogue magazine or something like that, or like People magazine, and doing, you know, like this is something people are going to read, and I should put a little thought into it, and I should consider, you know, like

what words I put down. Well, he goes, caught the door greeter, reception desk, pickup desk, security, specialists, and auction room desk in white lies that cumulatively

guard saying, what are you talking about? You caught how many

frontline workers and lies?

Everybody. Every one of them, Chris.

I would say if you're finding that they're all lying to you, that you're either mistaken

or you're in a place where you just don't even want to be involved and that you should just leave and not go there. If it's like...

They're trying to do something really bad to you. If that many people are lying to you, it's like a conspiracy.
It's literally a conspiracy, it sounds like.

It whips ass because he says the door greeter is number one. Right.

Okay. Can't imagine what he said.
He said it was evening, but actually, it was 11 a.m. Something wasn't adding up.

I mean, you have to assume that it's the same white lie that they're all caught in, right? Like, yeah, but why are they?

Why is the door greeting involved in this lie? Oh, I think this person is making them involved by like,

they're responding to it in in some way. And then, oh, so you're part of it too, you know?

And it's like, they're just saying what they're supposed to say as someone who works at the, what they've been trained to say or whatever, you know?

Yeah, so I can, I can, once again, I'm going to read through the people that have told white lies. Let's hear how, let's have, where is this place?

Christie's teaching house. I would love to hear just how many fucking liars work there.

The door greeter. So he gets to the door.
He's lied to. Immediately.
That's a shitty way to start to. I know.
Now you're already on edge at that point, you know.

And you're suspicious of everyone, fair enough.

Door greeter? This guy, he's supposed to be my friend. This guy's reception desk.
You can't trust reception desk.

I'm a little bit like, okay, maybe, you know, I'm saying I understand how they could lie. You know what I mean? Maybe I'm more drawn into it with him.
Pickup desk, which is the next desk.

No reason for them to lie. They're just handing him an item.

That's what's going on. These people are all all just doing like, hey, come in.

The door greeter lied to me by saying he hopes I have a good day. And I can clearly tell he does not hope I have

The White Lions. He doesn't believe they're sort of just like basic pleasantries

at the shop. He was not.
He was not very accommodating to me.

He was not offered a T.

I don't understand how the

I don't understand how the door guy lied to him. I can understand the other ones, but yeah, the door guy does not make any sense what that lie could have been.
Who else was lying, though?

Security guard? Security guards will lie. They'll lie.
Specialists? Specialists in what? Lying?

And finally, the auction room desk. And he caught them in white lies that cumulatively led up to significant losses that made one want to warn fraud.

Exclamation point.

So it sounds like

you made a bit of an auction mistake and you did a bad bid on something, or you were stupid in some way and you were looking for them to rectify your stupid mistake and they wouldn't do it.

That's what I feel like happened. Going up to the door greeter and say, so you think this is like, this is going to be like worth more when I try and sell it again, right?

Like this, this is this John Lennon. I mean, it's got to like go up, right? And they're like, yeah,

absolutely.

Absolutely.

He's like,

He ends this review by saying, corporate culture appears rotten from my vantage and experience. Now, this last line, I love it.
I agree. I love it with everything in me.

Participate in business with this group only when absolutely necessary. Well, if they have an item that

if you need an item from the estate or need any celebrity, then

well, you don't know what people need. But yeah,

that's also leaving the door open to say like

i will i will do business with them again like that's what's funny about

if necessary i will do it and because they know they're they're addicted to the auctions they can't they can't stop and it's this is a house of fraud like then he's like back then the doorman's like oh it's you again you know yeah

you'll get him this time

you'll win i know you'll win it's it's it's cool it's cool to see because it's like Christie's, so it's really high-end stuff. We can assume this guy is rich, educated.

I really like seeing a review from a guy that's clearly putting his entire million dollars of private education into it.

Because so often you see reviews where it's just a guy being like, the food was fucked up. But this guy's like,

I must say, if I'm going to do business with Christie's, there's a few things you must know. And I really, I appreciate that, man.

That's the ones that we hate, well, I hate the most. Right.

Yeah, because they're,

yeah, they're really

written in that way. Like,

I want people to read this and appreciate the writing. It hurts writing and know how smart I am.
I like those things. I like to listen.
Me, I'm down in the trenches. I like when I read a review.

It's like. Water's too cold, hurts my teeth.
That's what I want to see, you know? Then I know you can't go there. Fry's too hot, burn mouth, one star, hate this.

Yeah, that's the louder we want to say. That's loud Music, rock music.
That's

just a complete personal grape that has nothing to do with the establishment, is completely based on how you interacted with it. That's what we live for.
Oh, this guy, Tony. Yeah.
Yeah, old Tony K.

This guy says, one star.

Do not bid on an item listed on Christie's. I had a traumatic experience with them.
Oh, shit. Okay.

Now I meant

something happened bad. That guy beat his ass.

I bid on a Grand Seiko peacock watch for $9,500

very thinking

I know they did I loved it and within the first sentence you don't have to feel sorry for him anymore

you're like oh you did what like you just like decided to do that one day

ten thousand dollar watch and I'm pissed how it turned out yeah wait a second how did you decide yeah how do these people I guess they get into the culture of it right and they know they go to the auctions regularly and they just have a bunch of money and they're like oh that would be lovely for my Sunday evenings or whatever.

I'm a watch guy. It's a watch guy thing, too.
This guy probably, he does mention this later. He goes,

he goes, I figured that would be the price I would pay, but wrong.

There was a 25% buyer's premium hidden cost. So they tacked on another $2,500 to the cost.
I guess I missed this somehow, parentheses, by not reading their terms and conditions thoroughly. My fault.

Okay.

At least they own up to it at the end. So, why? Yeah.
It's a review. That should be a review of you, then.
I mean, that's not really like.

Well, the next line will really get you.

There was apparently a cost calculator that was easily accessible from the item page, which I didn't even notice. Oh, so they're really not trying to hide this.

It's not like I think, because you know, some of these places, like, oh, they got them hidden costs.

They got this is something they're like aggressively trying to make you aware of, probably because of some litigation that they had at some point. You know, yeah.
And this guy saw it.

This guy putting it in the review, I think is one of the most beautiful things ever. Cause most people don't ever say, I did everything wrong and didn't pay attention to anything.

Yet I'm still very mad about this.

Which is how I listen, I feel that way sometimes too. You know what I mean?

But for me.

When I get ripped off and it's a terms and conditions thing, I'm basically like, you got me. Because I know that there's no way to get whatever you spent back.
There's just no way. Yeah, yeah.
yeah.

Yeah, you just have to, you have to, you have to fucking sit in the shame of it for a little bit, and it feels really horrible.

And it's like, there is this sort of people tend to, you know, you want to like react and find somebody else to be angry at when you know at the end of the day.

And once you like settle down, you'll realize it's you. You fucked up.
That's who you're angry at. But yeah, you just sit in that shame for a little bit and say, okay, I fucked this up.

And next time I won't let it happen again. And then inevitably, a couple months later, it happens again.

You're smoking a bit too much of the weed there, you know, and your baby's always on your brain. And then you just keep fucking doing it.
But that's okay. Also, it's funny to say, like,

fine, nobody reads the terms and conditions. So it's, I'm not, this guy is like, I missed it, my fault.
And the terms and conditions.

And that's how we all react when we get fucked by the terms and conditions. It's like, well, nobody reads it.
So I guess I'm fucked. But then saying after that,

that there was a cost calculator that I missed that was easily accessible on the page. Immediately, I'm like, I don't feel sorry for you.

What I can't figure out is like, okay, because I understand like the previous ones we've looked at, reviews in general.

It's like someone is writing a review because they're mad and they're and they're showing they're mad and it's an emotional response. But then I like, why did he write the review then?

You know what I mean? Like, now we're going to get to it. Humility.

It's called humility. It's called humility.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He goes,

He goes,

anyways, this is not the worst part.

Since I was legally obligated to purchase this watch, since I had won the auction, I reluctantly paid the total of $13,000.

I had no choice. They forced me.
They even charged almost $200 for shipping in which they didn't even give me a cheaper option, which, by the way,

when you're spending this amount of money,

you know what I'm doing? You're not going to spend

$15,000 wash just in a fucking like random ass box. What are you talking about? I'm sure they're ripping you off on shipping.
They're ripping you off every single corner because this is

an auction house that is exclusively for like

extremely wealthy people.

It's all things no one would ever need, and it's just for the to have. Yeah.
So they're, it's like, oh my God, how am I, how am I getting ripped off here?

Like, it's like, because you're at Christie's auction house. Just go to a fucking store, man.

And you're broke, you're fucking, but you're not. You, a rich guy would never know a guy with the amount, a guy with an amount of money that can afford a $13,000 watch would never complain about $200.

I don't know, it's tough to say because I think there's probably some people who are listening and thinking, like, oh, I've dealt in the service industry with like really rich people who are really horrible about stuff.

So, I guess they can be, but I just don't think they would ever notice or care. You know what I mean?

But, like, there are definitely, I feel like, really rich people who are super petty about things still, you know, and could get really petty about something like that.

But, like, yeah, it feels like you just have to accept the fact that at Christie's auction house, they're going to drag you over the they're going to take some of your fucking money out with fees, you know.

I believe it. I've you doing StockX, which we're going to talk about later, you learn like fucking none of the prices on any of this shit is the price.

Like, if I buy a pair of shoes on StockX and it says they're they're $150,

they're actually $220.

It's just like

part of buying stuff from an auction. I think I've mentioned it on here before, probably.
The one time I bought off StockX was wonderful shoes.

I still fucking wear them to this day, and I've had them for like six years, but they're like high-top Gore-Tex Air Force Ones, Arctic White, and they're like just super, super nice.

But I was like, oh my God, I got them for a steal, $225.

And then, and because it was $210, like you know retail it was like I got them for just over and the fees were insane and the duty I got I got charged like a hundred and sixty dollars duty at the thing and so it ended up being like 500 something dollars I had not enough money to even pay for it it was a fucking nightmare thank god those shoes turned out to be like my best shoes ever yeah because they have a pair I have a pair right now in the in the Stock X system.

So what is StockX? It's just a resale thing for like sneaker.

Other stuff, too, but mostly sneaker heads. Like people will put up their shoes on there so you can buy stuff.
It's a real shitty, like a secondary market thing.

It has to be new, though. For StockX, it has to be new.
Oh, StockX. Yeah, but it has to be brand new.

Never used.

And I bought a pair of shoes because I wanted a pair of shoes. And

yeah, I paid, I think it was $150 retail. So I was like, that's fucking, and they're sold out.
Everything's scarce.

Right, right, right. Florida you can't find.
Yeah, that's what's because people buy it up to sell it on stock. Yeah, because that's right.

Yeah.

It's ticket scalping, but for sneakers. Is that yeah, yeah.
I got it. Yeah.

Anyway, he goes, they he goes, I reluctantly paid the total of $13,000. I had no choice.
They forced me. And then he goes, then when I received and inspected it, the watch had a small dent.

on the case. The condition was listed as superb, likely unworn.
I sent an yeah, a lot of people get mad because that's another stock X thing.

We're like, I got the shoes and one of the corners of the box was messed up.

Is it the cardboard box from Footlocker or whatever that it was originally from? Yeah, yeah. Okay, cool.

He goes, I sent an email to them reporting this. It took two weeks for them to come back and say the small dent does not devalue the watch and therefore unable to provide any additional compensation.

What?

He sees me, what? And he goes, this is absolutely insane. I was so offended to hear this as a watch collector.
I immediately called them.

Then they called me a day later and told me the same thing over the phone. I'm so tired of dealing with these people.

The watch department person spoke to his manager, and the best thing they could do was compensate me $300 for buffing and polishing, but would only reimburse when completed.

The problem here is that Grand Seiko uses a special polishing process called Zaratsu.

I forgot about the,

of course, the Zaratsu factor.

Because I was like, oh, that that sounds like it's totally no problem. But of course,

you think, yeah, and that's why he's the expert. You know what I mean? Because you're sitting there just being like, well, you just get this buff and polish out.

Well, actually, no, there's a whole other element to this. You feel like

Zaratsu factor. He goes, the problem here is the Grand Seiko uses a special polishing process called Zaratsu that can only be done by highly skilled professionals in Japan.
Yeah, so now

you got to get a plane ticket.

I don't know what the cost of that is. The accommodation, it depends on you.
You got to find the you gotta somehow get to the factory. You've got to bring a translator.

You've got to get you've got to explain the situation just to hear the watcher.

You should probably bring a translator. You could do the phone thing where you're talking to it and it says it, but yeah, probably.
I mean, a $13,000 watch, are you going to trust Google Translate?

Like, no, you're hiring a translator to explain exactly what you need done to this watch. You're going to hire him full-time for a year to get

this next line where he goes, How can I trust some random polisher to do this? Yeah, that's a good point. He probably doesn't know Zuratsu.
He obviously doesn't know the Zaratsu,

the Zaratsu fucking method. And it's like, I mean, I can't even imagine what that shit would look like done for the non-Zaratsu.

Oh, my God. It probably looks like shit if it doesn't get a Zaratsu polish.

I'm still in the process of trying to figure out what to do here, but I just want to warn everyone, I don't want this happening to anyone else. I'm so traumatized.

Obviously, first things first, you need to, if you have a gun, you need to get that ready if you don't buy a gun

because this is ridiculous it

did you i wonder if he mentioned to the people at christie's about the zaratsu right i know he did you know he did they gave him 300 and he was like how am i supposed to get zaratsu yeah yeah you know what i mean and and at the end he says i'm still trying to figure out what to be done about this nothing not there's nothing you can do it's over the thing is over the movie's over it's time to go home and throw the popcorn bag into the garbage can.

It's time to put the watch on and then put the case in the closet where no one will ever see it and not think about it.

And a guy would come by and see the case and be like, oh, look at that dent.

So did you use Sriratsu on that? Or it kind of looks all fucked up and crazy.

I don't want to call you out.

And some guy comes by, like a cable guy comes by.

Listen, buddy. Hey, I don't want to call you out here, man, but I'm pretty sure that you didn't use is.

Mario gave him one star, and he goes, and I love this one just for the first line. Just facts.
I'm a known customer. I wanted to purchase.

So a known customer. Like, okay, so yeah, they know you're a customer if you buy something.

Well, though, he's known as an I'm a customer.

He's a regular.

He's thrown so many fits before that everybody in the office knows him by name.

He goes, before the auction, they didn't request me the optional ID card and proof of address. I paid immediately the watch by credit card with a $190 extra cost for standard DHL

shipping. Crazy.
And it arrived on January 19th, 2018, just because I insisted. Duties charged to me 650, 765 duties paid by Christie's 645.

He said it twice. Then we're going to go to Pristine Auction, if you remember.
Pristine Auction was the place that sold the Donald Trump hat on Facebook. Yeah.

And this person says, let's not go back to the full circle.

Well, Stephanie reviewed him and gave him one star and said, worst company ever.

Worst company ever treats their customers like shit. Heaven forbid we are only human and make a mistake because they do not give a shit about you and won't even work with you on a mess up one time.

Whatever she did, she fucking blew it like you know that she and it was something so simple

and she absolutely she blew it in a way that they can't even help her if they wanted to yeah the system won't even allow it to be held no no higher even the boss can't do this because of the way it's laid out the bank can't help or she can go to her elected official her local elected official and just like vote for something next election cycle to maybe get something done.

She's so fucked. And you know she's so fucked.
Yeah. Because she's like, listen, I've I'm fucked up.

When they admit fault, you know that it's like, it's really bad. They're like, listen, please, I need help.
Like, it's like a plea. Yeah, they're like, I am humiliated myself there.

Well, this is Trust Pilot 2, which is the home of the bad review. Like, this is where you go if you're fucking pissed.
You go to Trust Pilot, you give it a one star, and they let you curse.

And you just get so mad. He goes, I spoke to customer service.
She goes, bid was accidentally placed higher than I wanted.

And I spoke to customer service immediately and they said they could not do anything about it.

And once it went through, instead of paying the amount accidentally placed, I could pay a restock fee that was also high. So they did give her an O.
They did give her an O.

Listen,

I feel for her. That's a horrible thing.

She added a zero. You know, it was like crazy.
You know, it was like she bid like 10 grand instead of a grand or something, too.

Oh, and it, and it's it just like, but then you think about it in an auction sense, when you're talking about an auction, the higher bid is what gets it for you. Do you know what I mean?

Like, it's like, oh, if you actually had a bid the thousand, someone would have bid higher than that and probably got it. So it's really a difficult situation.
It is a difficult situation, you know.

It feels like the one thing the auction,

it does feel like the one rule you can't break in any auction online or not is like, well, if you bid, we have to hold you to it or there's no point. This like doesn't work.
Like, it's not like

you're not doing it against the system against the house. It's not like at the, you know what I mean? You are doing it against other people who have like a right to that thing as well.

So it does make it more complicated. You can't fucked up.
I'm just kidding. I don't want to, I'm just kidding, kidding, kidding.
You know, it's like,

I guess if you did it right away, if there was a way to like, but she probably didn't, right? No, she figured it out later.

They sold it. They given the guy the money.
I mean, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, yeah, because if you, if you do it right away, then it's like, oh, it's right back out for auction.
Pick it up.

They should have a safeguard for that, maybe. But yeah, this is just a situation where, oh, this is such a horrible thing to have to happen.

If it's like a lot of money, I could pay a restock fee that was also high and they would place it back up for a bid. A total lie.

They instead charged me for a ridiculous amount with all their fees and bullshit and went back on their word.

So if you want to be treated like shit for being a frequent buyer, then this is the piece of shit company for you to go to. It wasn't because you were a frequent buyer.
That's

really, it's because of the thing where you

bid the wrong amount in an auction. Right.
You did the one thing. You basically broke the one rule that you cannot break

at the auction.

Oh, it's so horrible to think of because, like you said you hope it is just but you know you hope it's not a lot but you think it could be a matter of thousands of dollars that somebody needs or whatever but again you hope it's christie's it is christie's is no it's not pristine oh

so it could be some

they bet they spent nine thousand dollars instead of nine hundred on the truck my guess is maybe my guess is i honestly probably a thousand dollars instead of a hundred. But no matter what, if you add

zero, you're fucked. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's brutal.
Dwayne gave him one star, and he says, I hate to even leave this review. Oh, okay.
So he's doing this begrudgingly.

He's not usually someone to do this type of thing, but let's see what's driven him to it. I hate to even leave this review, but I'm left with no choice.

I've been a pristine customer for years and spent tens of thousands of dollars on items with them. I recently spent more than $1,800 on a Michael Jordan signed autumn,

signed item.

And the next day,

and the next day it was canceled without notice. This guy got fucked for real, by the way.
This guy. Yeah, that is a good question from Luke, though.
We don't want to skate over this one.

He autographed a leaf. I was like a leaf, like autumn.
Yeah. Okay.

I don't know. It's a funny concept for sure.
We don't call these out anymore. That's an old thing.

We don't. Oh.

That's where

I listened to the Stefan and Jesse episode from two months ago, and that's like kind of all you guys did. Well,

they also talk shit about me.

You know, they lie on me all the time. Nobody's ever lied more than they lie about you.

That's kind of what was the, that was the, you know, event that took place where it's like, we're not going to do that anymore. Call like that

because the top there.

It's like, well, the podcast can't always only be that. And it was becoming that because of the mistakes or whatever.
That's what they call once.

He goes, he goes, no one for, he goes,

I spent more than $1,800 on a Michael Jordan signed item, and the next day it was canceled without notice. No one from Pristine reached out to explain.

And after contacting them, I was told they didn't have the item and couldn't find a suitable replacement. They have dozens of Jordan autographs listed.
That's a funny way to put it.

Like, just give me one of the other ones. Just give me one of the other ones.

Grab one from one of the other guys. It's just like some pen.
It doesn't matter what it's on. Like, come on.

He goes, they offered a $100 credit, which does does me no good with a company i no longer trust so they gave him all the money plus a hundred dollars and he's like i don't trust this company because there was like an error in their computer system that's so funny i'm guessing that yeah or not even an error in their computer system i'm guessing what happened was that it was like somebody trying to do some type of fraud or something or maybe they just or they just pulled out at the last minute and they said like i don't want to sell this item anymore so then the item wasn't available for them to do it and and yeah there's nothing they can really do in that instance other than give you your money back.

And if they're really nice, I guess give you a hundred dollar

credit or whatever, you know? Well, the next thing he says is a terrible way to treat a longtime customer. And I can't tell you how sad I am about the whole thing.
Wait, what did he want from them?

I don't know.

The Michael Jordan. Go find it.
Because there's on your website. You have to track this down for me now.
Have you ever seen a major motion picture like this?

I mean, it would be a great adventure for you.

You know, you and maybe your nephew or your maybe like i could come or whatever if you find me out i don't know we could go to some cool guy's house any younger family members who are sick um yeah that that it feels like that's what he wants is for them to recover this item for him because that's the only acceptable thing because the money he doesn't care about the money it seems like it's the principal user guy it's the principal of the matter yeah the pristine auction guys kicks in the other guy's door to get the michael jordan thing

Fucking put this on your website.

But if, okay,

in his defense, I mean, if one side of this auctioneer's covenant is that if you place a bid, you'll get the item, is not then the side from the seller that if they put it there?

I mean, it's a complete breakdown of trust.

The seller in that instance is just unforgivable and would be banished from the website, I would imagine, you know, like you wouldn't be be able to do that again from that account.

You'd have to disgusting. It's

disgusting behavior in this country. It's terrible.
We got one of those coming up in a minute. I want to read this Sotheby's review, which is the other famous auction house.
Sotheby's.

Yeah, you know, can I ask a quick question? Do the auctioneers at Sotheby's and Christie's, do they talk like the other guys, or do they go like plop blah blah blah blah blah blah?

I was curious about this.

I think that's just, I personally, I think you just do the, I don't know, though, because I've never seen, I've seen those auctions Yeah, and I've seen them do the gavel for like some piece of art and they got the handstands, you know, yeah, I don't understand auctions at all like I will never buy anything from one because I don't understand them.

What do you mean? I don't understand what's happening. What do you mean?

I don't understand what's happening. I don't know what the fucking guy's saying.

They're auctioning an item off and the amount of the item, they're saying the amount that you need to bid. And so they'll say like, five, do I hear 400? Do I hear 400?

Then if you think you want to pay 400 for it, then you put your paddle up and you're bidding 400. Wait, wait, wait, Chris.
You didn't hear anything. You're holding something up.
They saw something.

Yeah, is that what you're not understanding? Because, yeah, then they're saying. I don't understand it at all.
I don't get what they're doing. He's saying that, but I'm explaining to you.

Well, like, listen, we know he's saying the number. He's saying the amount.

He watched the video early

one, two, three, four, five. That was the first lesson: you've got to know the numbers.
Brian, Brian, he's not saying one, two, three, four.

We're back to this. I thought you were kidding around.
No, he's saying the amount that is like that the item's up for auction for. So like, if it's like, do I hear 200? Then he'll say 200.

We got 200. We got 200.

250. Do I hear 250? And then he'll keep raising it until people stop bidding.
And then the person who bid last will go going once, going twice, sold to that person. What do you go to auctions?

Are you an auction guy? No, I just have seen like

films and television and stuff like that. Me too.
I've seen them. I don't get how they fucking work ever.
I just know, you know what, my, you know what I know?

When I see it in a movie or a TV show, I know what happened because the guy hits a gavel and then our guy wins it. The guy we're following around in the movie.

I don't know what he's saying or whatever.

You understand the end result and you understand maybe him getting there and what he wants, but it's just sort of like the path to get to those two from the other side. So when the guy says,

do I hear 400? And then if our guy says, I will bid 400, he raises his pad. And he gets it.

Well, and then they say, say do i hear 450 if nobody else says 450 then he gets it at 400 but but they they get a chance to go higher and higher so it just keeps raising up you know he sometimes why do they have to do it the way they do it i i think it's to drive the price up uh it's uh it's sort of like a real old school way to drive a price up of something

just a clarifying question when you say why do they have to do it the way they do it can you expand expand on that a little bit yeah what do you mean by what does that mean are you mean the voice or just the whole

talking, yeah, the battles? Cool.

First of all, we just watched a wild that wildlife thing or whatever. That right, who knows what was going on there? Yeah, and that's talking about vaccinations of that set.

Yeah, and that guy's a world champion at this, so I don't understand what he was doing, how people were bidding, right? What they were getting. There was like 12 fucking bulls there.

Was he selling some of them? Was he selling? Was it a lot? Yeah.

i think i'm on brian's side now this is it's fucking it's and and frankly they're talking so strangely where it's like i could i'm hearing the numbers but i don't know if they're slipping in words like hey you're gonna

you know we get to take your house your wife and you and there's a bunch of others it's like a sort of devil's covenant you're talking like you're talking about verbal small print they're hitting it exactly exactly and once you agree to it once that paddle goes up you don't know what the fuck you just agreed to oh yeah i did ask you to come out or fuck my wife

so i get to use your grill

i get to hang out with your kids sometimes it's just a fun i always want to the family you know what i mean like we don't know

well i did find an article from the western college of auctioneering uh which i might have to just go to to learn

for this

you could go to school and become famous for it like you can become the best in the world you could get a world championship i think i just found my new thing so he says says, examples of auctioneer one lighters.

So these are things that happen in between the numbers, right?

This is a lot of his hang.

So one of them says, oh,

that didn't sound good, David. I don't think you could do that.

Sorry.

I would like to personally apologize for the sounds that made. Yeah, that was so fucking

stupid sounding.

All right.

So he was was positive they aren't doing that. I just want to say for the record.
So he's saying, he's saying, don't hesitate, participate.

I like it, and so should you.

You like them all day.

I'm your financial advisor. That one's a little

chicken.

I also don't think he can say that. Yeah, legally.

Yeah, he can. They say it.
Okay. That's part of it.

These are lines that you can pick up for your fucking whatever is going on at an auction water's warm

the thing is as handy as a pocket on your shirt pretty good for that kind of money pretty good for that kind of money let's go to the bank asking y'all shout received deal of day

I here's what's revealed to me is that I had no idea they were saying anything at all. I thought they were kind of just making noise.

And I legitimately thought it was like, oh, yeah, the part of it is they're like doing this like rhythmic noise to get you excited. I didn't know they were like doing like bits in in the middle of it.

Yeah, they're doing it. I want to say, I don't, I don't, I hope this doesn't come across as offensive, but you guys both are so fucking ignorant about auctions.
It is wild to me.

I mean, I, I, I, you didn't know they were saying stuff in between all of us auction heads, all of us auction heads.

We know, we know all the good sayings, we know who's got, you know, barber's got some sick uh in-betweeners. We call them in-betweeners, right?

Well, I do have auction jokes, Chris. If you'd like to see some jokes here in a minute, after we read one more thread here from r/slash eBay,

this is a fucked up one, okay?

eBay sell. This is the worst behavior of a seller anybody's ever seen, and it really pissed off the whole song.
I hate sellers. I fucking hate Luke and I hate sellers.

I fucking hate sellers, but I love buyers because they're the backbone of this community. If we didn't have buyers, where would we be, bro? I come from a family of buyers.
Yeah.

I'm a you can't say that either. Okay.

eBay seller mad about

Canada. I can't say it.
Let me tell you something. Go on Reddit and type auction, and the first NSFW one is one of the most wildly offensive things I've ever seen.

Oh, yeah. I would imagine stream now.
You're telling me, wait, you're talking racism on the internet? It's not necessary. It is racism,

but also it's not people of color that are being auctioned off. You get what I'm saying? I don't know that we, okay, I don't, I don't, it's sexy ladies, is what I'm telling you.

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. They auction get whoa, whoa, whoa.

Okay, never mind. You can't buy a sexy lady.
It's just a joke, I think, that they have, but it's very weird. Uh, won an auction for a card on eBay the other day, got a pretty good deal.

Figured the card sold for $35

under comps, so he got a $35

win there. And that vernacular is under competitive pricing.

Or comparable thing. Like market value.
I instantly paid for the card and was excited to add it to my personal collection. Actually, he said PC, but that's only Chris would know.

Yeah, I don't know that that's, I think he's abbreviating too many things. I think he's just trying to, I don't think that's a thing.
PC. Trying to speak insider.
Yeah.

The seller messages me and says they're upset about the sale price because they're going to lose money on the transaction. What would you guys do?

I'm all for doing the right thing, but I'm also conflicted because listing an auction, you're always taking a risk. And I would have overpaid by $35.

I'm sure the seller would have told me to pound sand. Of course, this isn't even up for debate.

This is why sellers are. I mean, I'm a seller.
Go to the fucking pawn shop if you want a flat price. You're on the auctioning, son.
You get in there. This is you get your hands dirty.

You might lose some, you might win some. I mean, that's just part of the game.
Yeah, exactly. It's like that.
You can't just. Oh, no.

I have more money for my my car.

No, dude.

Now we want the good part of the auction. Don't you understand? I only want it when I rip you off, not the other way around.
You idiot.

So this is an absurd thing to do, to come to someone after they buy it and just be like, hey, man,

can you give me some more money for this thing? Like, honestly, I know you're not like, you don't are not obligated to, but like, fuck, man, I'd love some more money. You know why?

You could have bought this for like a flat amount, but then you purposely purposely are using this service so you maybe didn't have to do that.

Can we just like take that part out of it so I don't get totally fucked here? Fuck me. I mean, dude, if I was the seller.

Cash. If I'm the seller, I'm like, dude, $35 isn't going to break your bank.
Just give me the $35.

Honestly, you know, is that not the perfect tactic? Like, if you're an eBay guy and no matter what, you fall up with a DM like, dude, I got hosed on this. Is there anyone you can send me a little bit?

There's nothing illegal about asking. You know what I mean? It's all right to ask.
Hey, man, you got a really good deal on this. And here's a picture of my kids.
Young.

Sorry about the photo. The lighting is terrible at the hospital, but yeah.
Here's a picture of my kids' parentheses. Sick.

Yeah.

The first comment is they put it up for auction knowing the risk. They should ship if they don't leave a bad review and block typical scummy ass behavior by a seller.
Agreed. Fuck.
I disagree.

That's rude. He goes,

the next guy goes, yeah, don't make any concessions nor feel bad about it. That's how it works.
You don't negotiate with terrorists. Yep.
Well,

oh, no, that's next week. I'm sorry.
The umpire

episode. That's one of the quotes.

As an eBay seller who has lost $50 on a card, I would suggest you do nothing. You have done nothing wrong and have no obligation to cancel the order.

There is a possibility he doesn't ship it and he refunds you. If he does ship it,

make sure to record yourself opening the package.

I'm always leery about spiteful sellers. Yeah,

well, you want to funding it? Yeah, because you could have a good snuff film that your family could use.

Potentially.

Yeah, that's, I do want to clarify something for the listener as well.

I think this is the first time this has ever happened where Brian was like, well, and he like alluded to something that hasn't happened, like it hasn't come out yet.

It's not even recorded. Yeah, normally it's something we recorded ahead of time, and it hasn't come out yet.

This time, I had no idea what he was talking about, yeah, because we're recording that episode tomorrow. So, I know, yeah, it's crazy.
I just was, yeah, it popped in my head.

I thought I got them mixed up because I've been prepping them both at the same time.

You hear this like big word that is like a funny line in something that you're just researching, you know. He goes,

it signals to your co-host like it's a really subtle way of being like, I actually am working on the podcast, and I have proof.

Uh, either channel says, uh, ask him if he's going to give any profit he's made from cards back to whoever he got the cards from. Yep.

Panini.

Would the seller lower the price if it went for too much? So they're all like,

I mean, this is like, I think, such a clear. I don't think

there's anybody who would take the side of the seller here, even other sellers.

I like this part, though. eBay sellers are the worst.
Same thing happened to me. Just leave negative feedback.
Next comment.

Not all eBay sellers do this kind of of crap.

Get the fuck out of here. Yes.

Yes.

Not all eBay sellers. Yes, dude.
Get out of here. We got you, Pal.
Like, this guy is like, you're not welcome here. Run him out.
Yeah.

Actually, when I sell things, sometimes there's things you don't understand. Bro, get out.
We don't need you here.

Sometimes there's something called overhead costs.

If you put a bid up for auction and you get what you get and you ship to the highest bidder, period, next guy replies and goes, I have over 1,700 sales there and not one negative feedback.

Some people are just trashy people.

Got the sellers involved.

That's the classic guy, though, who feels the need to, which I kind of understand human nature a little bit where they're just like, hey, they're talking a lot of shit about the sellers.

And that's what I am. I'm a seller.
I feel the need to defend myself.

I'm one of the good ones.

Yeah, I'm one of the good ones.

Of course, there's some bad apples yeah there's some bad apples but overall as a as a force they the sellers are good as a force they're good and you'd rather have the sellers out there you know

than not

uh

so maybe one or two more reviews and then uh i will read some jokes but we can read some jokes up front before a review okay uh thank you for not auctioning it thank you for not making me wait for the jokes you could see it in my eyes that when i heard i was like

i love jokes look i used to and

like the most that had something to do with jokes. Really? Yeah.
No, I'd like to hear an episode about that.

No, we're never going to happen.

He's not allowed to talk. Told him he's not allowed to talk.

We did stand-up guys.

He had to pretend like he wasn't one for the whole.

I think this shit sucks. I definitely wouldn't spend a lot of my life at open mics at bars

before I could have missed going to grad school. These guys are pathetic.

It's so funny.

Do you imagine me me saying like hey you're not act like a especially after doing lego guys where i was just like and wrestling guys where everybody's mean to me i'm trying to think of what we have a couple sorry brian but we have a couple that are big lubowski guys i obviously got caught in the crosshairs a little bit i mean have we done we haven't done soccer guys right no i got caught like we're going to talk some soccer tomorrow uh i got caught in the crossfire of the smart guys episode well i made that joke yeah but it was me that

i literally made the joke in the beginning. I said, I'm a little worried.
I'm going to get caught in the crosshairs on this episode.

I said the exact words. You stole my jokes.

What are you going to do? Joe Rogan?

I'm going to get stuck in the crosshairs for smart guys. Not you, me.
Holy shit, this guy just stole my joke.

I'm in Sea'd your ass. I call it Mincia'd you.

How does that make you feel? I bet you don't like it. It makes me feel okay, to be honest.
I don't really mind. You could steal any of my jokes.

You could do any of my jokes

in any setting ever that you want to do them, Brian. I mean that.
You never have to credit me either. This guy goes, one of, here's a joke.

And the reason we like the jokes is most of them are AI, so they're not good.

Wait, sorry, before we start, do you mean jokes like there's our auctioneer jokes? Or is it what is this like a segment? Yeah, yeah. What do you mean exactly? Joke the guys do.
It's just the guys

auctioning out. Yeah, we don't have segments.
segments, we don't have segments. Okay, yeah, sorry.

I almost had a game this time, but I

that's kind of offensive to you. That's not really your guys' thing.
No, not

going back again to Brian's email. I was not so, yeah, okay, I got it.
This guy goes, one of Shakespeare's original pencils is going up for auction.

Problem is, it's very chewed, so nobody can tell if it's 2B or not 2B.

2B pencil. Is that a titano pencil? Yes, it is, Luke.
Yes, it is. Yes, it is.
And let me say something. Typist, you fucking typist.
He used a fucking quill, dumbass.

It doesn't even make any fucking sense. Next.
He used a quill. You're right.
But you're a typist. You're a typist.

They got fucking graphite back then, you fucking moron. I got a sad one coming up.
Luke, are you a typist or not, though? Do you, have you ever used a pencil or a pen?

Do you know, are you, are you so young here?

Can I tell you? I think I'm the cusp age, and I have this vivid memory of being like 10 and being like, I don't need to be fucking good at handwriting. I'm not going to need this shit.

And I was right. And I'm an old full typhus.

Do you say you're your age? I know some actors don't. Yeah, yeah.
No, no.

Well, I like to see. What do you guys think? Well, what's our age is

Brian's about 27. 27.

Your age. I'm guessing your age, 27.
Yeah, yeah. Okay.
That's when Jim Morrison. My guess is older.
I think you're 32.

Chris hit it on the motherfucking head, man.

See, I said 27 because that's the number I think all the time.

If I was 27, I would die. So I might

need it. Yeah.

I didn't know.

I celebrated a birthday a week ago. I hit that mother, the magic 32.

Wait, what's the Jesus age guy?

Here's a sad joke. I think this, they don't understand how sad this joke is.
Our local auctioneer passed away.

He was somewhere around 30, 35, 35, 40 that's funny that's very young that's honestly pretty good that's a funny joke that's funny and that's it that that I like that I do

I like that joke and if it's told like in a real you know what I mean like if you hit that he was around like 40 45 can you like can't you imagine the guys in the cattle video like all of them sitting around in like the green room and someone does that and they're all just like

because I could see that so vividly like they would love that shit oh that's it that's one of the best that's that's

asking for a laugh in between.

Hey, look at our standing ovation here. What else? Doing stand-up powder.
What else? What else?

You're on a date out of here.

Here's an idea.

I had to click and say, I'm over 18 for this one. Shit.
A married couple are in bed one morning, ostensibly after fucking and sucking. Wait, wait, wait, what? All night.
Not necessarily.

But when a couple are in bed, they just usually finish. There's jizz all over the place.

But Brian, if they sleep in the bed together and they're married, they sleep there every night. So you're saying you figure they're fucking every night? Probably.

He goes, I had a really good dream last night, says the wife. I dreamt that I was at a penis auction.
Long dicks were going for $100 each, and thick dicks were going for $200.

So you get a chod for $200.

Yeah, I guess thick dicks is

better.

Yeah, short and thick

does the trick.

Yeah, the old adage.

Is that a thing or did you just did you just make that short and thick does the trick?

It really sounds like something you've heard before. So that is quite impressive.
I have heard it before because, of course, everybody knows I have a two-inch fetus, but it is fucking

swat. Oh,

it's like a Coke can. It looks like a dinner plate.
It looks like a a Coke can, but like just cut off

a quarter of a hundred. It looks like something you would smoke weed out of as a kid.
Like it's like a

joke, he goes,

Really? says the husband, what would mine have fetched? They're giving away dicks like yours for free, says the wife.

And he goes, that's funny, actually, he replies, because I had a dream that I was at a vagina auction. Juicy cunts were going for $500

and tight cunts were going for a grand.

How about mine? Asks the wife.

That's where they were holding the auction.

That's a good idea.

I'm going to get the inside of her cavernous

blown-out pussy.

Okay, okay, I got it. I think that they were holding the entire auction.
I don't even know.

All right. I kind of like it.
Yeah, I mean, listen, that's a, you know, that's a pretty nasty joke. We don't really like to traffic in that kind of stuff generally, but that's just kind of fun.

That's funny, though. That's funny.

I think it's funny to use the clinical term vagina and then switch not to pussy, but to cut. Yeah.
Just completely like turn it

so nasty. Oh, it's such a nasty joke.
Yeah. He said, what did he, what did he, did he say juicy?

Juicy.

It literally did.

When you said that out loud, it did did give me go like, like it did send a little chill down my spot.

You know what's so fucked up is that Brian says so much nasty stuff to me now that I don't even get that feeling anymore. I used to, but now he says it.

I'm like, oh, it's just Brian like talking like the way he does. Talking about God, when I read that on a page, I had to click it to open it up.

And then the next joke is exactly the same joke, but for less money.

Exactly the same joke, but they're at breakfast. So

yeah, that's our auction jokes. Maybe we can.
God damn,

that hit so good. Here's a StockX one for you, Chris.
So one thing I want to tell you, Luke, is at StockX. When you buy something, it has a tag on it.

That's like a little plastic thing that says that StockX has looked at it and it's not counterfeit. Okay.

That is like part of buying stuff from. Sounds like the fees is that.

Yeah, because they mail.

The person mails it to StockX. StockX

almost 100% of the time says it's real. right? Then mails it to you.
And then you got a fucking 16-year-old looking at it and going, Yeah, I don't know, look like shoes. I don't know.

Yeah, notoriously, they have gotten it wrong, definitely, in the past,

quite a bit. But yeah, it's a huge thing, counterfeit shoes.

Jason says, Jason says, one star. Stock, this is so good because you know

this was planned. Like this, this part of it, once he got the shoes and he decided he didn't want them, this was planned from day before he did the review.

Shoes were delivered with the StockX tag already loose. Because of this, you void the return.
Even more unfortunate that there is suspicion of

inauthicity in this pair. I've bought other items from StockX before with no issue of the product or the Stock X tag.

Seems like a scam on StockX part to purposely put a loose StockX tag on a pair of shoes that does not seem authentic. I'll be reporting this transaction to the Better Business Bureau.
Oh, thank you.

I was wondering who it's a human rights tribunal.

The police can't even help you on this one. You gotta go right to the fucking top.
We've never done, we've only done this like one time, but a really good untapped

place for content is the Better Business Bureau website because everybody thinks they're reporting it to the police or the government. And it's just some company that you basically pay for protection.

Next person says, Impossible to list item. Keep saying this is insane, guys.
This will be the last one, and we'll go.

One star, impossible to list item, impossible to list item. Keep saying they are going to send me an email.
Two years of trying now.

Customer service. Absolute joke of a company.
Just like what's going on with dad now. Oh, he's still

selling the fucking eBay video.

Still doing the whole email email thing trying to get his uh his stock x account uh what's going on dad like oh um

yeah my kids are in preschool now

well i talked to the stock x guys again nothing nothing

there's a guy kurt who sounds like maybe he has like a bit more authority

i think i'm finally going to figure it out this week okay we just want to have a nice dinner please do you want to i quit my job

full-time deal with stock ads yeah

i had to quit my job i

i mean they were getting mad at me at work

two years is an incredible amount of time to put in there just trust pilot you never disappoint uh luke tell tell you got anything you want to plug i was going to do the tell us where tell us hey tell us where to find hey tell us where to find

and then i could do a funny riff like oh yeah you can find me on the fucking interstate begging for change.

Okay, bye. And then we end the episode.
And then, yeah, before you go, does that guy hate like unhoused people? Or like, why did he think that was funny to say?

You say that, and it's like, in reality, you like desperately tried to save face at the end and like changed the course entirely and had a real great joke, but we cut that off.

Right, you just cut it out because it's funny. This part, this part isn't in it.
Right. We've already.
But you're trying to get the viral clips. You got to get the viral clips.
We're not trying.

Podcast guest absolutely fucks up big way. I hate to tell you, we ain't trying.
We're getting them. So anyways, where can people find Julu?

Check me out.

I stream like five nights a week on Twitch, twitch.tv slash the Luke Man.

I do like a lot of call-in show formats.

I do something called Fortnite Talk Show where I go into random groups in Fortnite and just start telling people they're on a talk show and get them to talk to me. It's very fun.

And yeah, you can find me on most social medias. Just look for the Luke Man.

Or if a 12-year-old got that first, which a lot of them did on YouTube and stuff, it might be the Luke Mans with an S at the end. Okay, that's come get your Luke Mans.

Yeah, Luke's very funny, as you guys obviously can tell because you listen to the episode. And he's part of the goo crew, which the Go Off Kings are friends of the Go Off Kings.

It's a collective of streamers. I have been applying for, well, I guess about two years now.
I've been trying to get out of here. Yeah, they're not.
They will not. And I want to be clear.

You might think we aren't seeing them. We are seeing the others.
Oh, I I know you guys.

There's people who send me videos of all of you guys looking at them. Yeah.
But sadly, because

we want to be in the Gook Crew. They've literally never said a word.
I know. I know.
And that's why I wanted you to know it's not that we're not getting them. So you don't need to keep sending them.

We are getting them.

We fucked it up. I'll send different ones.
Brian,

I got a different sort of game plan for this year. But

Brian,

the reason you're not in the Gook Crew is because of your association to me, and that's very obvious. But we will get into the Goot Crew if it's the last thing that we do.

And we have the Go Off Kings coming to our live show out in Toronto. Don't talk to them there.
We're flying them out.

We'll have them in a sort of hotel situation where they're not around their loved ones. They don't have some of their safeguards there.

And at that point, I think it should be a lot easier to make them understand our point of view on things. Right.

And that's so funny because they're actually flying me out to that show to make sure stuff like that doesn't happen. What just happened? What was that sound?

Oh, Brian's gone now. Okay, Brian, your audio is gone now.

Is this better? Can you hear me?

I thought that's how you ended that. Sorry, I accidentally pressed a button.
I was literally sitting here like this, and my finger went like the time I accidentally played that audio clip.

So we'll see you all next week with

umpires. Yeah, you literally said it earlier.

There's a whole thing about how it's the first time you've ever mentioned an episode you knew about.

Bye.