Guys: Episode 96 - Simpsons Guys with Talking Simpsons

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Welcome to Guys, a podcast about guys.

I'm Brian Simpson, and with me is my co-host, Nelson Muntz.

But you did the

Martin Prince.

Oh, Jesus, that's an embarrassing flow.

I had it on the fucking screen, and then I had to hide it to do something else.

I was going to call you the nerd.

I have nerd kid in the Simpsons up.

I'll show you guys.

So you're

that's safe to say, you're you are now Martin.

that sucks how did i do that see i had it up on my screen this was up on my screen when i was reading the beginning of the show i'll get our guests on here god damn it you it is interesting that this is this is already interesting because you put in nerd in the simpsons and there is there's a few options definitely and they're all shown here you know obviously mill host but yeah we should we should get into the we should introduce the guests and making their second appearance on the show for the thing they actually are

do their show about

Henry Gilbert and Bob Mackey from Talking Simpsons, who we are letting talk about The Simpsons instead of South Park this time.

Hi everybody.

So

now, am I going crazy?

Or

were both of you guys on?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

South Park episode.

Yeah.

I'm going crazy.

I'm going to be honest with you.

I'm going crazy because in my head, only one of you was on and I don't even know which one.

It's not like I remember one specifically and like don't remember the other.

I just remember it being one of the members of Talking Simpsons, but I will take all of your word for it.

You're like freaking Sideshow Bob over here.

Okay.

We can now see

your screen is on, so we can see you now Googling crazy guy from The Simpsons.

So the joke doesn't really hit quite as hard.

Let me stop sharing.

You're kind of like Sideshow Bob over here.

Yeah, Sideshow Bob homicidal murder.

I mean, Sideshow Bob is a serious, serious issue.

Child murder.

You know,

he wants to be a child murderer, right?

Oh, wait.

Shit.

Old.

Oh, I'm not going to say that guy's name.

His name's the old Jewish man.

That's his canonical name.

That is what it says.

Yeah, I think it's fine to say that.

But so we're pretty.

Now, do you guys, are you guys, we're talking about Simpsons guys.

You you guys into The Simpsons, our guests?

Not really.

It makes us money, though.

So

that would be awesome if you guys really just, it was all just a put on.

When did you start watching The Simpsons?

Like, are you old enough that you're able to have watched it from the start?

Oh, yeah.

Episode one for me, but Henry goes back even further.

Yeah, I go back to the, not the very first season on Tracy Ullman, but I really did as a, I must have been five or six, I saw the last season of shorts of Tracy Ullman.

I remember being so

worried that something bad would happen to Maggie Simpsons because they did a two-parter of like, Maggie is lost.

And they'd never done a two-parter before.

I was five.

I'd never seen a two-parter before, probably.

And so I thought, well, she's going to die if I don't watch the next one.

I'm so stressed out.

And yeah, then I went straight to the,

I appreciate appreciate you thought that we could be young enough to have been like, oh man, I was I was born in season 10, yeah, I know, honestly, you guys look, you guys look younger than you know, than that.

I feel like because I think I'm around the same age then, because I would have been around five years old when it came out, uh, you know, originally, bro, what about you, Brian?

Were you

into the Simpsons, yes, not from Tracy Allman, I didn't know about that, but I did first season guy, you know, and I had a shirt, I had the uh, what was

well, my brother had the cool one, and then I had the one that in retrospect was not really a Simpson shirt.

Okay.

What was your brother?

My brother had the one that I didn't do it.

Nobody saw me do it.

You can't prove anything.

It's got Bart on it.

Now that's a shirt.

That's really cool because when you're a kid, it's like you're always wanting to misbehave in that sort of way.

And for some reason, I picked the Bartman shirt where it's Bart dressed like Batman, which isn't even really a Simpson shirt.

One, and and two, he was never, I don't think he was ever Bartman on the TV show.

Well, you guys would be able to answer.

Yeah,

he was, but only to reference the shirts.

And I thought Brian was going to say he had the either Bart Tracy shirt or the Teenage Mutant Ninja Simpsons shirt, all the fun bootlegs from that era.

Oh, those were, like, I was just going to ask, those were not authorized by the Fox Corporation.

Yeah, Bartman was.

Bartman, official character.

Official character.

Okay.

It's hilarious that you have Batman, huge in 1989.

So they go, Well, what about Bartman?

And it was just a drawing they put on a shirt and it was so popular.

And I loved Bartman.

I should say I love Bartman so much.

I had a Bartman shirt and poster.

And, but yeah, it was only by the end of season two when they go to a comic book convention, Bart dresses as Bartman to try to get in for free or half price.

And so it was, it was only them referencing themselves when Bart dressed as Bartman.

You say you're you're a big you loved bart man i gotta say i i hate bart man and that's only because i'm such a big fan of chicago cubs shout out to all of our baseball fans out there who catch that joke that's only versus the sports fans he's a he's the baseball guy i get it no you don't explain it yeah i do explain it explain it

he ran the baseball team yeah

well you know

the yankees just had their own mean bart man like that though the yankee guys guys put the Bartman to shame.

Yeah, they, and for everyone, just so we can give context, of course, most of us know, I would say 95%, but I mean, Steve Bartman, yeah, I know.

Steve Bartman was a guy who reached into the staff famously and took the ball away from Moises Alou.

I think it was Moises Aliu.

But yeah, the new, the guy at the Yankees, what happened back at the, yeah, that was, I mean, because he ripped it out of the glove.

Chris is a Yankees fan because he likes like the top teams.

Yeah.

So I went to a website called No Homer's Club.

Apparently, I don't like Homer, I guess.

I don't know.

This seems like the main situation.

I bet you're allowed to have one in there.

Hey, thank you.

Thank you.

Yes.

I mean.

When did you, you guys still watch the current episodes?

I can't.

You have to, right?

I mean, we do.

I mean, so.

Oh, go ahead.

No, no, no.

I was just going to say, I think I ducked out

maybe 10, eight years ago or something like that.

Is that fair?

Is that a reasonable time, do you think?

I think most people, I mean, people our age, we talk to, they stopped watching in the 90s.

Oh, my?

Yeah, I guess mine would have been late 90s, I guess.

So it's been longer than that.

Yeah, time flies.

Sorry.

What were you saying?

Oh, I was going to say the South Park episode was a lot of fun, but I feel like this is all entrapment, and you're going to play clips of our podcast back to us and show some things that we've written because I think we're on the borderline.

We could be Simpsons guys.

We're self-aware enough to not fully enter that world.

I'm going to tell you why you're not Simpsons guys.

So, I got two reasons to tell you why you're not Simpsons, guys.

I can see your background, not a lot of Simpsons stuff.

The only character I can see in Henry's background is Mario.

I can't see any characters in Bob's background.

That would be one.

If you turn this thing on and you had all the Simpsons guys, and believe me, I'm looking at action figure guys.

So I've seen some fucking rooms.

I used to have some, I had some Simpsons action figures, definitely.

Like, I was, I mean, I think, like, most people, I was fucking obsessed with it.

So, I don't think it's, I think it's reasonable

to have at one point been a Simpsons guy.

You know, I just, I keep promoting, yeah, now

it's not as, it's not as good, right?

You guys watch it.

Is it not as good?

Or what?

There are different standards for every era of the show, so I think you have to walk into it understanding that they can't make the show like they used to, so the standards are different.

It's just hard to keep doing a show for a really long time, too, maybe with the characters and stuff like that.

Well, as they're on season 36 and nearing 800 episodes, like it's been such a long time, and then on top of that, well, you may have seen, uh, Brian, I don't know if you've seen this in your Simpsons guys' research, but in the discourse in media right now, it is the there is the discourse of the simpsons are back the simpsons are great again like so oh really i don't yeah that's the surgeons they go well congratulations to them i might have to check out some of their episodes um some of their new stuff you know what i watch nowadays i'm sorry to say i watch bob's burgers if i'm gonna if i'm gonna sit down with a with an adult adult with a cartoon with an adult cartoon adult and large quotation marks i don't watch any cartoons

oh he's got a bunch of legos behind him.

Don't get on your high horse.

This guy's on his high horse and it's made of fucking Legos for God's sakes.

Come on.

I am thinking about buying.

So ever since I started collecting Legos, I'm like, I got to buy this Lego Simpsons set.

There's a Simpsons Lego set, but it's retired.

It's going to run you about $650.

But I think I'm going to buy it.

I was just going to say, so you're probably okay.

It's a smaller set.

That's it.

What is it?

What is it?

It's the house and the car and the Simpsons.

I mean, that's cool.

I will admit that is cool.

That is like a, if I were into Lego, that would be something that would, I would think would be cool.

Let's go to No Homer and we're going to see some Simpsons.

He keeps saying it like that.

And I just, I don't know.

It just sort of makes you think of the other phrase nowadays that they use.

No Homer.

No Homer.

Ah, good one.

I think I need to disclose the fact that I read and lately posted on No Homers for about five years pre 2010.

So do you

find you?

Imagine, do you remember what your username was?

Could we look up some of your posts?

Oh, would you be willing?

Would you be willing to do that?

Would you be willing to do that?

You know what?

In the pursuit of fairness, it is Bob Servo, just like my Twitter Blue Sky.

I've made myself very easy to find, unfortunately, having been online so long.

I did too.

I told people my old nickname, and now it's like, forget about it.

So anyway, this is Simpson's Pet Peeves.

This is a thread started by the abominable Dr.

Lenny.

And he's a stone cutter on the thing.

I don't know what that means.

You really don't?

You don't know the stone cutters?

I don't know what it means.

I know that it's an episode of The Simpsons.

I don't know what it means on the board.

Like, where does that put you?

You know what I mean?

I would assume it puts you in the higher level.

Like, it's like you're elite.

You'd be elite.

I should also admit that that's a name of a tier on our Patreon.

So

abominable Dr.

Lenny linear or stone cutter.

Okay.

I mean, listen, we're not going to be judging people's Patreon tiers since ours are called the bull tier and the hot wife tier.

Yeah,

that's true.

But also, that is, it's sort of, it's really ripe for this because there's so many references and in jokes and stuff like that.

They can just go on forever and ever and ever.

So I can imagine you could find some posts where it's just, there's just so many references and things like that.

And it could become arguably like a little bit insufferable, maybe, even to people who are fans of the show.

These are great.

I got to tell you, some of these are going to get you guys.

I can guarantee it.

This is the first post in the thing.

Just for little things they do on The Simpsons that annoy you.

Mine is Lisa beating up Bart.

She's done it like a million times now.

It's just annoying.

Bart has been practically neutered as a character in general.

Oh, shit.

Yep.

He could easily kick this shit out.

If we're thinking about like pound for pound, wise like, are we saying that?

Because he's meant to be sort of a, you know what I mean?

And she's like sort of a studious kind of nerd.

Are we really saying that she's like could physically beat up Bart?

That is kind of ridiculous.

Right, guys, discuss.

Well, one of, one of the rules of the show is that Homer cannot strangle Lisa.

It would just be going too far and be too ugly.

So I feel like the same rules apply to other characters damaging Lisa.

That's fair.

Lisa can't get punched by Bart because people will be like, whoa, hey, then Bart would get, there's a website you can go to to get your man card revoked.

That would definitely get Bart's man card revoked if he hit Lisa Simpson.

This is, this is a good, but is now is he allowed to, is Olmer still allowed to strangle Bart in the new episode?

Oh, boy, man.

You're stepping on landmines here.

It's uh, yes.

Is he allowed to?

Does he, does he do it still?

It's because of woke.

He can't.

Of course.

I mean, people assume that they weren't allowed to do that anymore.

And then James L.

Brooks pushed back and said, more stranglings.

And that's how the end of the season premiere goes.

Exactly.

Yeah.

They did.

So somebody noticed that it had been like five years since he strangled Bart on the show.

And then they did a joke in an episode last year where Homer said, and sometimes I strangle Bart.

I'm just kidding.

It's a different time now.

And so then the headlines came, they're not allowed to strangle Bart Bart on the Simpsons anymore.

And then James L.

Brooks released a public statement saying that is not true.

He's going to strangle him forever.

And he's, they, the strangling resumed.

Uh,

that's funny to be like, it's funny to be like, man, it's been so long since Homer strangled Bart.

Like, what's up with that?

Like, a guy getting really worried about the show going woke, which we'll talk about later.

Um, a guy getting worried about the show going woke.

And, and the wokeness is not Homer can't strangle his child.

Yeah,

it's pretty heavy child abuse, but it is like, I guess, it's cartoonish instilled.

Yeah, his

tongue sticks out and his lips wave.

That's not what really happens.

He doesn't die after either.

He's fine.

I was at a violence gang and I probably choked.

You can't, don't try to own it.

No, no, no, no.

Don't try to fucking own it.

Like he tries to, now he's trying to, to act, oh, I was in a violence gang and like, he's like, oh, I had a different name and stuff.

He's like, it's this whole new strategy.

I promise you, when the mics are off, he's just like, God, I wish you would stop saying that stuff.

I really wish, please.

And then he'll say to me, like, I'm going to try new, before this episode, he's like, I'm going to try new strategies.

And I was like, oh, I wonder what that means.

And now we see what it means.

Crab Pooh K-Sip.

Pick up.

Bart, I think is it's backwards.

Me and Bob can translate all these for you.

Yeah, we'll give you year production code, writer.

I know Yvonette Niage.

I do know that because I've been singing that song because The Simpsons, before phones, before, you know, smartphones, you would come home from work and the Simpsons.

Here's a classic old man ran.

That's not what I'm saying.

I'm saying you come home from fucking work.

No, yeah, no, I get it.

And then the kids aren't on their damn smartphones.

And I know Brian always says that

because he'll say, like, oh, they say there's a zombie apocalypse.

And it's, and it's like, he's like, I actually see it when I go up to the mall.

That's

like, what do you even mean by that?

And he's like, he's referring to the phones, I guess.

No, what I'm, what I'm trying to say is it was on in syndication on Fox for like an hour every day at like five o'clock.

And you'd come home.

and kind of sit down on the couch and maybe sometimes I'd read the newspaper and watch The Simpsons.

It's on in the background.

Maybe it's an episode you've seen.

It's like a rerun or whatever, but it's a good, familiar thing to have on in the background.

And I've seen a million episodes, right?

And then when I got my phone, I was like, well, now I just sit on the couch and look at my phone when I, but then also, I don't have a real job that I come home from either.

But when I finish podcasting, I have to really unwind with my phone.

Yeah.

This guy goes, totally agree there.

I know Bart and Lisa are brother and sister, but Lisa beating up Bart just seems out of character.

Another thing that gets annoying is that the fact that homer only cares for himself in modern episodes well that's a selfish

homer selfish from day one like that

more recently it's become more selfish you haven't noticed that in recent episode he only cares for himself what yeah does is any elaboration on that in the thread at all well there's more stuff in the thread but no that guy just said that

He's like, Homer's selfish these days.

It's gross.

It was, yeah, isn't it kind of like, it's like one of his main character traits.

He should be a socialist.

Homer should be more socialist.

He should, he should.

They've probably done that episode, you know, 800 episodes.

They've probably done something like socialist Homer.

I don't think that's happened.

This next person goes, yeah, I thought Bart was supposed to be an antagonistic little hell raiser.

And Lisa was supposed to be his little sister, who was more intelligent than him and annoyed by his antics.

But apparently she can just kick his teeth in whenever he annoys her.

I was totally fine with them fighting, but now against all logic, Lisa is just way stronger than Bart because ha ha, a girl can beat up a boy.

As far as Homer goes, he suffered from poor writing on numerous occasions, but I actually think he's been written better in these last few seasons.

I love that when they start to sort of break it down, suffering from poor writing and like sort of breaking down the process of it, stepping away from it.

Yeah, listen, the bottom line is we all know Bart is way stronger and also tougher than Lisa.

I think we're, but we're getting away from the point.

If they're having a fist fight, Bart's going to fucking hit her one, two, left,

oh, she's she's going to be out cold.

She's going to be fucking, he would be able to kill her, you know.

And that is what they're saying, really, is that Bart could kill Lisa if he wanted to fight the shit out of her.

Do you get you guys again as the experts, you can't argue with that, right?

Bart's got to be got to be able to beat the shit out of Lisa.

Yeah, we assign all the characters' power levels in Lisa that does rank below Bart.

Of course, that's that's simple.

I mean, oh, this is an interesting one, though, for me that I'm interested in.

Mo, Zizlak, and Barney Rubble.

Barney's not.

Barney Rubble from the Flintstones?

Yeah.

Wait.

Oh, I mean, Barney Gumble.

Yeah.

Well, I would say Barney seems to be kind of unbeatable.

He has been shown to be very tough thanks to his intoxication.

While Moe is a dirty fighter.

fighter so i mean i guess he'd fight dirty but if this is just like bare stripped to the waist no weapons i'm betting on barney every time for sure yeah i mean there was that scene in uh in duffless where homer is trying to knock out barney and just slamming his car the his head in the car door over and over i forgot about that completely i was thinking he'd be so drunk you know what i mean that he might not be able to like fight or whatever but i forgot about the famous episode where he's like you can't hurt him no matter how much you hit him so yeah not the the best example.

And also I did, of course, call him Barney Rovel to start.

Now, anyone that's going to try to fucking pound any tables right now, by the way, I got a note for flub heads because this is an important message because this has been bothering me.

You got to look at a tweet that I had a long time ago where I explained it.

If Brian does it, it's called a flub.

If I do it, if the guest does it, if you do it, it's called the honest mistake.

It happens to all of us.

And we don't need to bring it up and make a big deal of it.

Okay.

Financial Panther, who is is an administrator on the site says couch gags that have more effort put into them than the actual episode those make me so goddamn mad it's more than a pet

wait he's mad that the good ones well i think i see where he's coming from that basically

they've i'd say the last 10 years at least they they have they invite guests to do a couch gag and sometimes they can be like two minutes long

and they're just a whole episode.

And it is like it distracts, it does distract from the episode a little bit to see Rick and Morty have like a full-on adventure with the situation.

Oh, hang on a second.

Morty and Rick are in town.

Now I'm my, now I'm interested.

You know that I'm a big Rick and Morty head.

Yeah, I'm still, fuck the new speaking of the new season having a resurgence, the new Rick and Morty is just fantastic.

Are they still making it?

Yeah, it's not renewed for five more years.

Oh, five years.

thank goodness hey cancel my cancel my suicide note

i've i've recently canceled that mine

of course uh a while back there on hollywood handbook did promise haze that he would not kill himself so i and he's sticking to that so good idea currently we don't know what's happened in between the recording of this episode uh cousin merle says uh Bart's portrayal in the HD

era as a sociopathic, talentless loser who is on occasion treated as mentally deficient.

That was very on and off, not happening the entire time.

And being treated so horribly and undeservingly by the writers always annoys me a lot.

So I want to get to,

this gets to the heart of a lot of people's complaints about The Simpsons.

Bart just isn't as important as he used to be.

Now, back when I used to watch it, Bart wasn't the most important character in the show anyway.

That was like for like, wasn't that for like a short amount of time where Bart was like the main character?

Then it turned into Homer.

Like almost like that.

But then maybe I think by the second season, it was already kind of Homer and then just sort of the whole, you know, just sort of, but yeah, Bart was meant to be the main character kind of.

And then they, they sort of changed course.

Yeah.

So that that's kind of a weird gripe to have if it is your gripe, you know?

Like Bart not being good.

I'm sensing something in common with all of these posts, and I feel like Simpsons fans are about to do their own Gamergate.

Yeah.

They are.

They're getting mad.

Well, Kangdos, because I agree with the, I agree with the quote, Lisa, beating up Bart thing.

It's another one of those examples of how out of the loop the middle-aged Simpsons writers are, since they think that

the median age is 50 on Simpsons writers, I'd say.

Yeah.

But I know there are some younger ones, too, who are Simpsons writers, just because I know who they are.

Do you know what I mean?

Like, I happen to know them.

So

sentence writers are since they think that a female beating up a male automatically is funny because, quote, what's this?

A boy being weak and a girl being strong?

That's not how it's working.

Oh, how joyfully subversive.

And I don't know.

I think you're doing.

I don't, why it doesn't have to be that.

Maybe that's just a plot point that Lisa can beat him up.

Maybe it's meant to be done for humorous purposes.

He finishes this out with something you guys are going to agree with probably.

He goes, please leave that dead horse to anime writers.

Honestly, at this point a male beating up a female in a comedy is funnier because it's at least a bit offensive and unexpected that is it is funny if i see a if i'm watching a cartoon and i see a guy i see a guy just fucking throttle an older woman or whatever i will that's funny that's funny brian you can agree as somebody who used to you know attack women i've never attacked a woman in my life i want to be clear just that made it sound bad that made it sound bad he didn't him and his group of friends would like approach an older, like elderly woman with groceries or whatever and do a stranger attack on her, play the knockout game.

You did not do that.

Number one, I never attacked a woman or

I always say or an old person, but that.

That's not true.

That part is a stretch.

You always forget that you did do it to an old person, and then you get halfway through the sentence, and then you fucking realize that you've made a huge.

It was a guy's dad, though.

It wasn't like an elderly man.

We know, you know,

we all know the story.

We all know the story of how would you beat up an older man.

This guy goes snorkey, says, said it before, but schmaltzy endings, particularly before Scully.

I could take the occasional schmaltzy moment somewhere during an episode, but ending episodes like this really annoys me.

And then he puts in parentheses, give me Homer shooting Marge with a tranquilizer dart any day over a quote heartwarming ending.

See,

it does keep coming back to violence against women because that was

the classic joke of Homer beating up, like, not, he doesn't, like, punch Marge.

It's like, there's also one where Homer, around that same time, gives her basically a nerve pinch that knocks her out as well.

And they were really into knocking out Marge then.

Oh, and there was the War War, too.

Yeah, that's, but that's funny because it's a man doing it to a woman.

Now, so that's that's double subversive.

Do you understand?

You don't understand double subversion.

Well, uh, you're going to start to see a little bit of a theme coming here.

Scrooge McDuck says

sad, it has a lot to do with Lisa.

One, she never gets caught on her bullshit or mistakes.

I understand.

What?

These guys are these guys are misogynist.

They might not like women very much, is my guess.

I don't know.

But specifically,

a

child.

Like, she's a child.

I know she's played by adults and written by adults, but that doesn't matter.

She's a child.

And I can't look at a child.

If you're going to be posting on a fucking message board about her, you're going to have to pretend she's real and talk about her as her age.

You know what I mean?

I love she never gets called on her bullshit.

That is funny.

Okay, that's crazy because on our podcast,

we have a jingle for the times that they do multiple episodes every season of lisa gets called on her bullshit and everybody it's called take that lisa's beliefs they they hate her beliefs so if you don't like her oh sorry no they're wrong you're saying okay

a little bit well i mean if you don't like lisa every lisa episode is about her losing or getting a friend and then losing every time she has an episode it's about getting in second place they make jokes about that where lisa can never have a victory because it's more emotional to watch her lose and deal with that.

So, even if you hate Lisa like she's a real person, she's constantly losing in the show.

Yeah, he does say what's what I wonder what this guy would like to say.

He goes, Someone who thinks she's morally right and she should be able to admit she's wrong without the bullshit.

I still think I'm right.

She's basically a hypocrite, close to a narcissist.

N-A-R-A-C-C-I-S-T.

So, narcissist.

This is a little bit.

This is a little, yeah, this guy is, he's lost it a little bit.

Number two, her high opinion of herself over others, for example, her mother.

What do you oh, she thinks she's better than her, I think she is smarter than her mother, right?

Number three, the way she treats Bart.

Quote, my brother is the scab on society's knee.

A very uncalled-for comment.

The writer should be ashamed of themselves.

Has Lisa apologized?

Yeah, honestly.

Honestly, like that, they should, that is, he called her.

I mean, they think about some of the, I mean, one of the characters strangles one of the other ones.

Well, he brings that up too.

He goes, but

he goes, I totally agree with the, you know,

Lisa winning a vice.

He goes, but a boy slash man beating up a woman is politically incorrect.

But vice versa is okay.

I'm not saying Bart should hit his sister, but for fuck's sake, he takes a punch and goes down.

Number five.

No, no, honestly, like, you don't have to like fucking hit her back, dude, but like, fucking stand up for yourself man like you're a fucking man dude it's like fucking talking to a fucking cartoon boy and what do you're a fucking man he's like got spiky yellow hair drawn on come on number five lisa stop whining number six

how they turned kirk into a sad sack oh oh boy okay oh my god so that's millhouse's dad

Wow, what do they mean turn?

That's that's he had no character until he was defined as a sad sack.

He was just

a man who looked like Milhouse.

Yeah, he was a bald man.

He was like Milhouse when he's older.

Imagine what Milhouse would look like when he's older.

Yeah, that's true.

It was only when he had the race car bed that's when he became sort of a well-known character.

The only thing you would learn the name of was when he became a sad divorced man.

But I, yeah, the second he said Kirk, I'm like, that's the one like non-family complaint you have is that they're too mean to the divorced sad guy.

This guy, do you think this guy posting might maybe?

Maybe.

I mean, I think because he says number seven, Homer being selfish.

Number eight, Homer strangling Bart.

And number nine, Bart crying, being a wimp and not standing up for himself.

A boy, a young boy crying?

Yeah, we don't like that.

Yeah, no.

Listen, I have, I don't talk about it very often.

Brian hates it.

He's an anti-natalist.

Is that what it's called?

No, I have a kid.

You have an adult.

But I have a seven-month-old, and he's sometimes he'll start crying about something.

I'm like, not in this house, pal.

This is sorry to say we don't, we don't play that game around here.

Yeah, it's, it's pretty pathetic.

If, if he was a,

I don't want to sound,

you know, politically incorrect, but if he was a girl, I would have no problem with him crying.

That's true.

So we're going to go to a different thread.

This is Springfield's conflicting/slash confusing opinions towards the Simpsons family.

As someone who's currently dealing with a nightmare neighbor family, I'm finding myself a lot more sympathetic to the rest of Springfield and Flanders, especially.

Ah, so they're like a problem family, you're sort of seeing, they're seeing them as sort of a problem family.

Well, Maggot

Magnet might shine a little bit of

on what this, he goes, LOL, this has to be a loaded question because it presupposes that I think the community fluctuates in their opinion of the Simpsons family.

I actually think the town's opinions of the Simpsons family is generally quite the same.

I estimate most folks have a neutral to negative opinion about the family, while some find them weird or mildly annoying.

Others find the family completely forgettable.

I think the Van Houtens, Moe, Dr.

Hibbert, Reverend Lovejoy, Burns Smithers, CBG, Elementary School Staff, Krusty, etc.

Let's say on a scale of one to 10, one being hate.

10 being love, most people have the Simpsons at a three to five.

So despite some mild annoyance, they're civil enough to at at least be friends at face value, such as coming over for dinner, inviting them to parties, or behaving politely at church.

However, as soon as any Simpson family member does a bad thing, their reputation drops to zero, and the town arrives at their house screaming and wielding pitchforks.

It's like a last-straw scenario, and the Simpsons are constantly on the penultimate straw.

I mean, I think the town has tried to kill the entire Simpsons family at least 15 times.

So I got to think they have a pretty low opinion.

I agree.

Yeah.

I'm just happy that no one is calling for Marge to be punched or saying, Lisa needs to shut up.

Don't worry.

There's more of that later on.

The family as a whole is under attack, not just the women.

Yeah.

And Lunacy says, all you have to do now, he's talking to the person who said they have a nightmare neighbor.

He goes, all you have to do now is forgid diddly of them, neighborino.

That's a reference to Ned Flanders.

Yeah, yeah and then she replies

go ahead henry oh no one no one would disagree that like you'd want a neighbor like ned ned's a good neighbor like yeah he's the good guy although i don't know he's like he's

super religious you know what i mean so i don't know like i would be a little bit freaked out having like someone who's like so religious but he is You're right.

He's just nice.

He's kind.

He's like, yeah, he's not going to have a party or anything.

He's not going to be, you know, disruptive.

He's a pretty ideal neighbor.

Having been the Simpsons of my apartment building,

well, I lived in this apartment, and the next door neighbor was always mad that we were being loud.

Well, you're that doesn't make you the Simpsons.

You're having

pictures all the time and a new job every week.

So this guy's always calling the cops on me.

What, what, on calling the cops?

How loud?

So, what, what era was this?

Like, how old were you?

When Gwen was in like first or second grade.

So

how, what job are you working at?

This is actually after job.

This is like college.

I was doing the college thing.

After job.

After job.

Yeah.

Okay.

This is all after job

era.

Like, okay.

Okay.

So I would play loud music, but during the day, and the lady would pound on a wall.

And at one time, I just punched a hole in the wall on their side of the room.

I was so mad at her.

You were mad at her.

Yeah, I was listening to a master pee really loud in the middle of the day.

Christ, man.

So, like, real heavy bass.

Like,

dude, that you're a fucking asshole.

Like, I would be pounding on the wall.

I would come over to your house and tell you to turn your fucking music.

During the day?

Yeah, during the fucking day.

Just because it's during the day doesn't mean you can fucking pound music as loud as you want.

Like, it's a fucking rock concert.

Jesus.

I don't you're in an apartment building, man.

You have neighbors.

You had to be a little bit, people are fucking some old lady sitting at home trying to relax.

No, these were young people that were always being mad at us.

All the time.

I'm going to have to, I know you and I know your tendencies and I'm going to have to side with the people on the other side of the wall.

And then you punched a hole in the wall.

Not through their side, though.

Just on my side, there was a hole.

So Strike, the person with the bad neighbors, goes, last night they woke me up at 3 a.m.

Diddly, diddly, diddly, and then 4 a.m., Italy, italy, diddly.

And then at 7 a.m.

in the week, where I have an insane level of work to get through, which is going to require a decent amount of focus.

Oh, hell, diddly ding-dong crap.

That's so you can see he's kind of like short-circuiting.

He's trying to keep the diddlies and the, you know, the good naturedness going.

Hey, hey, let's.

Anyone on the pod ever have any, you guys ever have a nasty neighbor situation?

Yeah, yeah.

No, I'm asking them a question, Brian.

No,

I'm asking really, uh, I do want to hear more about what's going on with these neighbors because if it was truly living next to the Simpsons, the noise would be coming from hilarious schemes, like no,

beer in the basement, uh, or you know, making guarding a sugar pile, something fun Homer would be doing something they called the police because they thought I was doing a growing weed operation.

You were, I bet, I bet you were.

I wasn't, I actually wasn't, I was cooking weed, and the whole place smelled like it.

Yeah, that makes

it does it does make a strong when you like make weed butter or whatever

yeah well i was making what what are called firecrackers which is what i ate for several years um

what else what is it so you get a nutella and you get townhouse crackers and you put the nutella on one and you put the weed in there and then you make a sandwich then you bake it at like 350 it decarbs the weed and all that stuff the problem was sometimes they were very strong like you wouldn't you You wouldn't measure them out super well.

Didn't have any idea how to do that.

I would just put as much Keef as I had in it, and then I would have a meltdown.

Several times I had meltdowns.

One time I had this crazy meltdown where I went up in my bedroom.

I had to get away from my wife and kid for a minute.

Oh, fuck.

I forgot that you're not like a child or a teenager here.

You're a fucking adult with a family.

I completely forgot.

Like in my head, I'm like, oh, God, you're cooking what you're doing.

Like, not even cooking weed.

You're doing it in this like, this like back alley kind of way.

You know what I mean?

Like a prison method of cooking your weed, basically.

So yeah, I do this thing.

I eat this one and I'm sitting there watching TV with Katie and Gwen.

And like an hour in, I just am in a different world.

Like I, I am, I am freaking out.

I can't.

How old is Gwen?

Probably like three.

I'd say.

Thank goodness Katie's there and responsible, right?

Like, do you know what I'm saying?

Like, thank goodness, because you're just, you're literally just told me you're in a different world and you have a toddler there that you're taking care of.

All right.

So I was trying to calm down.

I was trying to get calmed down.

So I went up in my bedroom and I took my shirt off and I paced in front of the TV and my jeans with NPR, with what's it called?

PBS.

on the screen because I couldn't handle any other stimulus that was higher than

PBS.

And I got past it.

You know, I got past it and I lived and everything ended up good.

Here's a question for everybody.

Cletus and Brandine

is the weirdest relationship in the show.

Because you know those two Hillbilly characters?

I feel like Cletus Spuckler and Brandine's relationship kind of makes me uncomfortable.

Am I the only one that thinks that?

I mean, they're technically related and they're brother and sister.

I mean, I understand how he could be attracted to his sister but

listen we've all been there he says this

we've all we all we just know you're not allowed to

i don't remember it's not weird yeah yeah yeah that's what he's looking for he's looking for people to be like it's not weird at all man like i actually think this is very cool and i think people who act this way are very cool as well he goes i mean i understand how he could be attracted to his sister but the creepy fact about it is that he had 60 children with her.

Yeah, I don't get why they make Cletus.

You can't forget about that because he names all the kids, and so he had to have sex with her a number of times.

He, well, it's also his mother as well.

Like, it's his sister and his mother based on jokes.

That's that's something in recent season Simpsons.

They, they wrote like a, well, not a serious, but like an introspective episode about Brandine and the life choices she's had.

And she's like, she's deeper than you think.

And I, and it was not a bad episode, but I kept thinking the whole episode are you going to address that she's Cletus's mother and sister when they're dating in the past year

it's it and then the guy goes I don't get why they make Cletus and Brandine related is is it a stereotype about hillbillies

yeah

it is

this guy may have said some of first

First he says, I get it.

You're attracted to your sister.

And then he's like, is that some kind of thing about hillbillies actually where they do incest i don't know uh oh and let's not forget that kirk and luan are technically cousins too according to an episode no wonder why mill house is such a weird kid yeah

and yeah or bob has a good theory about this actually

what a theory about they're related the the kirk and luan the the shelbyville theory Oh, oh, well, that's his attractive cousin, right?

That was something that was, I think, retconned because they were designed to look like each other.

And then we find out that she is from Shelbyville.

Right.

Yes, that's probably, maybe that's why the No Homer's Club is saying they're related to you.

But there's your canonicity of them potentially being related.

Well, Bart and Lisa are awesome says they are odd.

And then Jacobon Simpson goes, no, you're not the only one.

It's a pretty weird relationship, honestly.

Yeah, they're like, I mean, you're not the only one who thinks that this person who's married to his sister, who's also his mother and had 60 children with her, that that's a little bit odd.

Yeah.

And then Strike goes, yep, it's a curiously mean depiction of a stereotype for The Simpsons, which is usually more playful and a softer touch than shows like South Park and Family Guy.

I get the occasional nicer, more sympathetic moment with them,

but generally it's just laugh at the dumb, incestuous, pig-boinking poor people who have too many babies.

That's, I hate it when people, listen, all of those things, pig boy, I hate because this is just, they threw poor people in there to make you.

Oh, I guess I can't argue against that.

You know what I mean?

I guess I can't say that, you know, these hillbillies are

weird because Lenis does have sex with pigs.

It's true.

Yeah, yeah.

Well, Jacamon Simpson says, I won't lie.

I feel like the Simpsons depiction of hillbillies are very accurate somehow.

Although I'm

although I'm saying that as someone who doesn't know much about hillbilly culture or hillbillies in general and just assumes negative stuff about them, oh, okay.

Well, they didn't do the research the Simpsons writers did to create Cletus, a very deep, rich character who essentially is just all the he-haw jokes put into one person.

Yes, yeah.

I mean, that person is right.

It is, it is a really, it is kind of a mean sort of depiction of a stereotype because they are just sort of hammering it super hard and it's mostly negative stereotype stuff but i don't know i don't think most people that would be considered hillbillies or rednecks are are really hurt by that depiction like i i'm probably

on this show the closest to a redneck and it doesn't none of that you think so you think you're you think you're i might be closer than the three of you to being i mean i was born in arkansas i'm kind of close i have i have a redneck family

yeah but you for whatever reason i just don't get that from you at all.

I worked very hard

too.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean,

from Brian, I definitely get it.

I get it.

The way he acts and stuff like that and some of the stuff that he does and the way that he like talks and acts and the things that he's done.

Which adult female character do you have the hops for?

Oh, Marge.

And here's our list of characters first, and then we'll have the results of this poll, too.

This is a poll.

So we'll be able to give you guys the results if you're curious.

Marjorie Simpson, Luann Van Houten, Kumiko Albertson, I don't know who's that.

Who's that?

They mention her a lot.

That's fan.

That's comic book guy's Japanese wife.

That's oh,

yeah, comic book guy has been married for years now.

Nice

to a to and to a Japanese wife, but like okay, that's interesting.

That's an interesting little plot point.

That what, what's the like, where do they meet

Japan.

Oh, it's a crummy episode, honestly.

It's she, she's like a photographer who comes to America to photograph fat Americans, and then she just falls in love with him for poorly

explained reasons.

Gotcha.

Okay.

I like it.

Selma Bouvier.

Who's Selma, but not Patty, eh?

Patty.

Patty's here.

Bernice Hibbert.

Helen Lovejoy, Ruth Powers, Mindy Simmons, or other.

The big winner here is going to be Marjorie Simpson.

Marjorie Simpson.

I mean, she's the star as far as those, you know what I mean?

She's like,

you just can't help it.

Even if she's not the most physically attractive, maybe it's the most.

Damn.

Well, she's not.

We can agree.

It's obviously Helen Lovejoy.

She's obviously the most banging, but

just as far as like intrigue, it would be like.

You gotta, you gotta try to, you know, get in bed with Marge.

I think we all agree on that.

Number two is.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

We should see.

Brian, who would you, who would you think who do you want i'm not gonna a simpson

okay so don't play the game at all that's really fun for a podcast how about you henry who would you want to have sex with uh

i mean of the women on here is as a gay guy uh i guess oh

well i didn't i i it's not fair

no no hang on which which male Simpsons character would you like to have sex with?

That's well.

Well, first, I will answer on this one to the women.

I'm going with Luann because I think she's probably got some skills.

But

on the guy side, to just have to pick one Willie-Nilly, I guess.

Willie?

Willie?

No.

Groundskeeper Willie.

Well, he's handsome.

Groundskeeper Willie.

And Groundskeeper Willie is like...

He's got a good body.

He's very, very fit.

Very shallow, though, that I'm going with the guy with the biggest.

Though, what, Ned's really hanging dong, though, if I'm going on just pure size squeeze.

Who is?

Who's hanging?

Ned Flanders.

This is another guy.

Oh, yeah, of course.

And Flanders is, Flanders is a good-looking dude as well.

He's a handsome older man.

Flanders is like 14 inches.

Like, that's...

What the hell?

That's canonical?

This guy is stacked up.

14?

Holy shit.

I'm like, he's like one less than me.

Bob,

Bob, who would you want to have sex with

character?

It's going to be Marge.

If only I can whisper in her ear, make sure Bart hits Lisa more.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

You got to, you got to ask.

And then number two, I'll give you a quick second place, Mindy Simmons.

mindy who's mindy simmons i do not know uh forth

character she's a one-off character homer is gonna cheat on marge with but doesn't oh i've read about her it's wait

is that the one is that the singer

No, that's a different character.

That's like

old, old Larlene Lumpkin.

Yeah, because if she was on the list, who I would add to think twice.

Oh, yeah, she's hot.

I actually, Mindy Simmons is who I would.

Oh, so you look at, can you show us Mindy Simmons, please?

Nice titties.

What the fuck?

This is an undeniable fact.

I mean, yeah.

Oh, I remember at work, at work, his co-worker, right?

Yes.

Yes, I do.

I do remember.

I remember Mindy.

She was, she was beautiful.

And then she had Michelle Pfeiffer's voice, of course.

And yeah, she was very, very hot.

Blundy Simpsons Chibi says, Sophie's mother, to be honest.

Bouverella also counts because, let's face it, I like spooky stuff.

That's just Elvira.

Saying, let's face it before saying I like spooky stuff.

I love that.

Like, just framing it up, like, hey, let's face it.

I like spooky stuff.

No one, I have the hots for Linda Belcher, though, not playing the game.

Linda Belcher, Linda Belcher is, well, speaking of voices, Linda Belcher is not voiced by a woman at all.

Linda Belcher is voiced by a man, actually.

But Linda Belcher is, I don't think, I don't think she's sexy at all, though.

She's not like, you know, I don't, I like her as a character, but I, I would, no, I would never, obviously, Lois.

No, I mean, hey, if we're talking, if we're bringing in Seth McFarlane shows, then American Dad,

the, the mom on that, she's

Francine.

Francine's beautiful.

And I also like Francine's like, just sort of like a wild child.

Like, she's just,

I really have a lot of time for Francine, you know i uh no i i i do love american dad it's my favorite show of seth mcfrons i've said that many times strike says i mine's the orville strike says i i've actually never seen the orville but it's just funny to say strike says i'd have said none before last week because i don't find the style of the simpsons really lends itself to women i find to be attractive

This is, this is insane.

He's just like, he was sure he would never get horny for The Simpsons.

Like, it's been watching for so long.

He's like, this will never happen.

And then fucking, I'm so excited to hear what changes.

Yeah.

However, The Simpsons history on Lindsay Nagel has reminded me that she's had some moments of being a lady who very much knows what she wants.

And I can very much dig that.

What is who's Lindsay Nagel?

I have no clue.

She's the stand-in executive character

dating back to the mid-90s in the show.

So she's been around for a while.

This guy wants to be bossed around.

Oh, you know what I'm saying?

Oh,

he was watching some sort of compilation of her?

They call them compilations.

Jesus, man.

Jesus.

Oh, yes.

Oh, I don't know.

I mean, I know this character, but she's not like a main, like, she's, she'll rarely have a big character.

I wonder if he's.

Sorry, Bob.

I think

at this period of the show, but she's like on the same level as, I don't know, Dr.

Hibbert or

not, not so much Mo, but she's like C tier, I think.

Yeah,

let's go to the subreddit.

We haven't been there yet.

Oh, boy.

R slash Simpsons.

And the question is asked,

the question is asked, why is Marge still with Homer?

Why isn't she with me?

This is what the guy's really wondering.

Why isn't she with me?

I could treat her better.

Oh, Homer, he's fat, he's bald.

The guy's like, I got a fucking good amount of hair.

You know, I'm in good shape.

Like,

I could treat her, I could show her what a real man's like.

I would show her true love of true affection, true appreciation.

I would, I would fucking worship her like the queen that she is.

Well, snoo, snoo, snoo, snooze says, you saw what happened when she tried dating in the episode where she lost her memory, season 17, episode 20, regarding Margie.

So you guys have seen this one, I'm guessing, right?

It's been a very long time.

We're only on season 15 now in our timeline.

I see.

Okay.

I vaguely recall that she starts dating, like, she couldn't love Homer and ends up with a marine biologist type dude, I think it was.

And then she remembers why she likes taking care of Homer, I believe, is how it ends up.

Yeah.

Oh, I see.

That's okay.

So that's not really that great then.

It's not like she doesn't remember

how he lives her up.

One of the Beth Simpsons endings is the one of the marriage class

where Marge realizes Homer can only offer her complete and utter dependence, and she accepts that they are a codependent relationship, and she doesn't want him to die without him.

Mega Ben does say, for the most part, because for the most part, because all men except Flanders are terrible in Springfield.

All men are terrible in Springfield.

Not Flanders.

Dr.

Hibbert, what does Dr.

Hibbert do wrong?

Nothing.

He's a doctor.

He's offered to sell babies at a certain point.

Oh, but you know what I mean?

That's kind of wrong.

But you know what I mean?

It's like

part of the

core group of Springfield Republicans, too.

That's true.

Oh, he's a Republican, and all of a sudden, now

he's just a bad guy just because he's a Republican, Bob.

Okay.

I didn't write them meeting in Dracula's Castle in 1995.

This next guy goes, status quo is a powerful drug.

What does that mean?

First of all, it's hell of a drug.

Yeah, that's getting it wrong anyway.

The Chappelle show sketch thing.

Yeah.

What is it?

What is that in reference to?

Well, that she's the status quo.

Homer's the status quo.

Like, nothing has to change, you know?

Oh, I see.

They, they can't divorce.

Yeah, that wouldn't happen.

Well, didn't, didn't like default name says, I would imagine a lot of it's the kids.

Also some sink cost fallacy, cognitive dissonance thrown in there.

And frankly, as obnoxious and downright terrible as Homer can be, there just is not one person more interesting in the Springfield verse.

So she thinks, yeah, it's the sunk cost fallacy.

But she,

how large is the city of Springfield?

How many residents are there meant to be?

Well, they're horrible, no matter what.

No, but like, how many, is it like a city?

Is it like a town?

Is it like, how many does she have to choose from?

Do you know what I mean?

Are there new people moving in regularly?

Is it really like a small enough town where it's just like, because that is a thing in small towns, right?

You're just like, hey, okay, I guess I'll fucking stay married to you because there's only like Ben and Darian are the only other guys.

And they're fucking, I'm not going to go out with them.

So do you guys know the amount of people?

It just, it changes based on whatever story they want to tell.

It could be a Manhattan-sized city or a a small town.

Are you saying this?

Is this

some sort of cartoon where they just kind of play with reality and change it around or whatever?

The rules are a little loose on the sounds.

I don't

askew.

I don't like that.

I want to know what's happening in the house when they're not filming it.

There needs to be a consistent census of Springfield that starts every episode.

Yeah, I want to know

like just the basic statistics of the town.

Yeah, it should say that at the start.

Maybe just show the sign.

This feels like the South Park episode we did where people wanted to know where Kyle lives in relation to other characters.

Yeah.

Well, yeah.

Well, this gets a little weird.

And you were so you were the one who was on that episode, Bob.

I think it was me.

Henry was there.

Okay.

This guy goes, Homer must be a demon in the sack.

And then he gets a reply where the guy goes, Remember when he took Viagra shop for Mr.

Burns and carried Marge to bed and just plowed her?

She was like, Oh, homie.

I mean,

how do we get into this?

I guess I do remember that, but how do we get into it?

Just talking about how why are they married?

Why don't they divorce?

Because he he fucks good.

They're saying that that joke is dependent on Homer.

He's normally not good at fucking until he gets the shot from that, from the burn shot.

Yeah, the guy says he really is a demon in the sack.

Have you seen any of their sex scenes?

Homer shakes the house.

What

only when I want

a potion or Viagra?

Yeah, yeah.

I will say that I did, I did consider doing what I do with a lot of these episodes and read some erotic fan fiction, but a lot of them involved like Bart or Lisa, and I just felt weird about reading that.

You think it's weird to have like sort of a fantasy about having sex with Bart?

Do you think it would be weird for a radio host to

radio show Grease Man Alert?

Anyone who hasn't listened to this year's Shocktober, Grease Man did an audio routine in the 90s where he's basically, I mean, he's having sex with Bart Simpson in it, right, Brian?

Is that...

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I still have it if anybody's interested in hearing it.

It's very disturbing.

It's very disturbing.

It's genuinely disturbing.

If we run out of episodes to cover, you're going to be hearing us doing things like that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, I was, and then I did read a really good one that

I should have put a link to.

I wish I would have, where Homer needs some money

because he did some silly thing that he did.

And he doesn't want Marge to find out.

So he goes to Marge's sisters to borrow the money.

And then they do kind of like a, you know, BDSM thing with him for

to get the money.

So they put a butt plug in him and say he's not allowed to take it out.

They put one of those chastity cages on his penis so that he can.

He has to explain.

Yeah, it's a lot.

It was a lot.

This is not a vanilla one here this has a lot this has a lot of specific markers on it this is not just vanilla it was very crazy the next person

sorry homer said he uses viagra or potions or whatever and sort of you guys are inferring that that means he's not good at making love i just want to say some people

they have to use some sort of assistance, whether it be injections or pumps or the AMS 700.

And it doesn't mean they're bad at sex.

They could actually still be amazing at sex and that could be the reason why they need those because they did it so many times that it stopped working in the normal way I just want to put that out there they could burn through 20 condoms in in four hours and when you're doing it like that it's like yeah most people who are using Viagra or stuff is because they're not good at it but some people there are a few of them who are using it because they got they got too good at it hey look and if you want to find out about this it's it's twitch.tv slash murderexpar and you don't even have to pay for it yeah you don't have to pay for it it's on the patreon we put We put the

VODs up there on the Patreon, but you can just create story, though.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This guy goes, the show frames it as true love, but there are alternative reasons.

Pride.

The Bouillets have always believed Homer to be a poor choice for Marge.

A divorce means she has to admit her mom and sisters were right.

And then financial cluster fucks.

Separating the finances would be very messy.

The biggest asset is the house, but it carries a lot of debt and that it has the issue of Abe's 15K.

Homer would destroy the house in a few weeks without Marge there.

Marge would have been a little bit more.

But we've all seen that with a deer was in there and the thing swung open and there was a deer.

This is early Simpsons episode.

Marge went away.

Marge would need to ask her family for help to keep the house.

Well, it depends on what the child support situation is like and how much alimony she's going to get.

And we need to break down.

I mean, how long?

What kind of laws do they have?

And what kind of home?

Well, we've got to find out which state it's in first, right, guys

i mean that's ohio different

what it's ohio it's oh

yeah i choose to believe that there's some who think massachusetts but i well okay well here if we really i think illinois i think it's illinois i i think i figured out a way to on that uh the child support thing just view it as how it works with kirk van houghten because he's homer he's like if homer got divorced and in an episode uh kirk van houten is looking to get he is being paid alimony payments by Luann, not the, like, instead of the other way around.

That's funny.

He's so sad that he's got to get the alimony.

But Homer is the breadwinner here.

I mean, Marge

is a stay-at-home mother, right?

She has no income of her own.

So she would be dependent on a Homer.

And, you know, you hope it's not going to be a messy situation.

Custody.

What are we talking about?

I'd like to see the case.

played out in the

i mean and not like a funny version of it i mean like

yeah like a kramer versus kramer situation like a tim heidecker tim heidecker trial like the trial of tim heidecker style where it's like you know done in a very very serious way and it's very long

let's mix two guys together here uh rotten tomatoes

the review of the simpsons movies we're gonna look at so it's rotten tomatoes guys and simpsons guys what did y'all think of the simpsons movie oh oh we we talked about it on now three podcasts.

And I don't know.

I mean,

I was The Simpsons guy in my youth posting on No Homer's Club.

I really hated it.

And now I just think, I wish it was better.

And it just kind of like a V minus E movie, but not bad.

Not bad.

I loved it.

I loved it.

I loved it.

The only reason being is because I loved The Simpsons so much when it came out, I feel like.

And it like came out in the theaters.

And I was like, so, so I was still, when did the movie come out?

It could

See, I was still into it.

See, I'm not wrong.

I was still into it.

I stayed into it.

I still

thought you were wrong, though.

We had told you you were wrong.

Yeah, so I stayed into it.

So I was really excited.

And the fact that I got to go to the movie theaters and watch The Simpsons on the movie theater screen was just so exciting.

I don't remember what happened in the film.

I don't remember at all.

Well,

let's give the scores first.

87%

on the tomatoometer.

I can't tomato monitor.

Tomato monitor.

No.

Tomo.

Tomato meter.

Tomato meter.

Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And then our popcorn meter, which is what they call the audience score.

They changed it.

I honestly think they changed it because they're not even allowed to call it legally the audience score anymore because they're fucking they found a way to circumvent the whole thing.

It's one of my big conspiracies.

And I think that the SEC or whoever regulates that stuff said you can't even call it the audience score anymore because it's so it's such a perverted system now.

And so now they have to say pop.

It's AI.

It's, it's, yeah.

So anyway, uh, 87% and 77%.

The first one is a four-star review, and it's from 2024.

And the guy just goes, a movie who is simply a adventure of cartoons.

Agreed.

Agreed.

Yeah.

You can't argue with that.

Dane says The Simpsons, five stars.

The Simpsons movie is amazing due to its lovable characters, incredible story, and all the comedy that comes with it.

Okay, so

these are very cool.

People are very interesting these days.

It is like different,

yeah.

Sorry, different AI models are just describing the movie.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah, most definitely.

And this is what has happened.

I'm telling you, these movie that it's the product, the companies, they've figured out how to game the system.

So now all every fucking movie you see has like a 98% audience score.

They've just fucking gamed it completely with these AI fucking bots.

I do wonder,

this next one, we're going to have to probably judge whether it's AI or not.

Jeffrey gave it four stars, and he said The Simpsons movie was an amazing movie.

It was worse than the show, but it had really good messages.

The Simpsons movie was a really funny movie, and guess what?

I love comedy.

Also, The Simpsons movie is really interesting.

I've only watched The Simpsons season one through four.

I'm still in the fourth season.

And this movie has more idea than the seasons i watched in the show but the seasons i watched are funnier than the movie though my favorite simpson season so far is season four what a good movie i give it a 76 percent gave his own percent that's that's all in we love that when they they don't use it when they're like i reject your scoring system and i'll be giving it my own scoring system that's the best yeah but that's all

Yeah, don't you think we should be able?

That's how you should.

The audience score should be that.

Right.

It should be a percentage, you're saying of 100.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's too much, too confusing to a normal person.

Just give them five.

I say three.

We go on the stars.

Yeah, that's true.

We're a three-star

system where one, one is bad,

two is like pretty good, and three is really good.

That's it.

That's it.

That's all.

That's all people can handle, in our opinion.

Man,

the person has not watched past season four.

Give it a chance.

I don't know if this is a person.

We don't know that for sure because some of these AIs,

it did sound like AI, then it went back to sounding like a person, but it was really unfocused.

It was worse than the show was the part that

was incredibly confusing to me.

The way he said that, yeah, yeah.

Tyler says,

Tyler says four and a half stars, amazing, but there are better movies.

I mean, that's true enough.

That's true.

You guys, have you guys seen like,

hey, they live.

I have a shirt on.

That's a good movie.

What else?

Shawshank Redemption, I used to watch a lot.

Never seen it.

You know what a movie I used to really like when I was a little kid?

It was called Field of Dreams.

No, not Field of Dreams.

It was called A Perfect.

No, what was it called?

It was with Kevin Costner.

Perfect World.

Yeah, Perfect World with Kevin Costner.

And I think it's like about him abducting a kid or something, you know, but I don't,

know why as a kid, I

would like that kind of film, but I watched it over and over again.

You know, you want any

costner to take you on the road.

That's,

I get like, he seems like a nice guy and

also crazy.

So who knows?

Derek L says, whilst the plot for Simpsons, the movie remains almost as ridiculous and comedic as its TV show series counterpart, it still somehow works.

That's a three-star review.

And then finally, four stars.

I like how Maggie Simpson's doing big things to save her family, even though she's a little baby.

That can't be denied.

She pulls off so many incredible things a baby couldn't do.

And she says, She's doing big things.

She is doing big things.

So the final thing we're going to go to is Quora, the website Quora, which we love.

And the question that's being answered is, why is The Simpsons becoming so woke?

I feel like the whole purpose of adult animated shows is to be as raunchy and absurd as possible.

So, what Gibbs?

Wait.

Okay.

Correct me if I'm wrong.

Woke to the Simpsons guys here.

Bob,

was it ever a raunchy show?

I think it was considered

anti-family, anti-family values.

Anti-family values.

Yeah, yeah, okay.

By being center-left.

Yeah.

In H.W.

Bush's bush's america saying eat my shorts or i'm bart simpson who the hell are you like that was sure is seen as you know i guess more raunchy but this i mean by 19 you know the beevis and butthead comes so soon after the peak of the simpsons that like that is so much raunchier than what you'd call the sit like raunch not a word i'd attach to the simpsons well and then what year did uh two girls one cup come along because after that happened it was like you can't just be throwing that word around anymore to describe cartoons.

You know, that was in the 90s or the 2000s, mid-2000s.

I'll trust you on it, Brian.

It was during my Opi and Anthony days.

They were watching it all the time.

Remember, did you watch it?

Did I watch it?

Yeah, somebody told me the theory that I heard about it was that,

so this is what somebody told me.

I don't know this for sure.

Uh-oh.

That the women put pudding up their ass.

So it's a pudding enema.

It's not even shit that they're eating.

Yeah.

You believe in nothing no more.

Yeah.

If I found that out, that would fucking destroy me.

If I found out that the fucking stuff that I thought was shit and two girls, one cup was actually chocolate pudding, that would destroy my world.

Somebody did, that was something somebody told me, and I tended to believe it then after a while.

It was just kind of like, nobody eats turds.

Well, except for that one guy I saw you.

I mean, guys, nobody else eats turds.

People do, I'm afraid to say, Brian, you know what I mean?

Like,

most people not.

I am thankful that when that became popular, I had stopped hanging out with my edgiest friends who made me watch things on the internet with them.

I didn't, I saw similar things that I was made to watch on Style Project by friends, but

Style Project.

God damn it.

I remember Style Project.

I never watched Two Girls, One Cup.

I just, I still continued to hang out with

really awful, awful kind of guys and stuff, but they never managed to trick me to get me in Frank because I just wouldn't.

I knew I'd be sick from it.

The one we watched a lot more than Two Girls, One Cub.

Don't say it.

Don't say it.

Are you going to say the one?

Not that one.

No, not the one where the guy ate the turd.

No, no, no, no, no.

But there's the one that I have to take my headphones off if he starts talking.

He's got a little bit on his teeth.

No, that's not even it.

Okay.

It's a different different one the one i watched was uh we watched all the time was like i think it's like a like part farting porn

and it was just ladies farting in each other's mouths

and we thought that was the funniest thing anybody's ever seen like because it looked like real porno It looked like they were really getting down to it, but it was more farting.

But you know why?

Porno?

Because it was real porno because there are people who jack off to that.

So it was.

I ought to consult a porno expert that I know.

No, I mean, was their hair being blown back or was this added in post?

Were these farts real?

I don't know.

I don't know if there were real farts because I know there are guys and women that can suck farts in and then fart it out.

Like that they can't.

That's still a real fart.

That's still a real fart.

It's different, though.

It's not as, it's not like a.

That's still a real fart.

What's the word?

It's

to be made from your own like produced by your body it can't just be air put into that yeah it's like no but you're doing fart porn you have to you're gonna have to manufacture a little bit more action back there you know what i mean that's fair i think wait until a fart's coming i mean people fart like five times oh you're gonna have the whole crew waiting around all day for it like that's

brian do you fart five times every hour

maybe is that an abnormal amount of fart

yeah you shouldn't you shouldn't be regularly farting, in my opinion.

I don't like, maybe I'm wrong about that, but

I wouldn't say that I fart five times in an hour.

It depends if I, if I ate something that like makes me do that, but I wouldn't say that that's like a consistent thing for me.

I think I go many hours without farting sometimes.

Oh, me too.

Yeah.

He's lying.

You guys should see his face.

So here's our first answer from Edwin.

Sorry.

Well, we were talking about the porno and then Farting.

This show sometimes gets to gross places.

I don't even know.

It's Chris usually.

He

brings up the poop and the farts and the sick.

I don't even respond to it because everybody knows

how preposterous that is.

Well, this guy is the lead washer at U.S.

Lenin, Linen.

Like he, I guess, washes towels.

It's owned by Disney now, like everything owned by Disney.

It's all super woke now.

Look at Star Wars.

Look at Marvel.

Now look at The Simpsons.

Oh, excuse me.

Look at Marvel.

How about look at a certain Ryan Reynolds who's actually fixing that problem with Deadpool being anti-woke.

Sorry.

Why am I quoting Mike Zero?

I got to tell you, Mike Zero's latest few posts are so funny.

What is he talking about now?

Mike Zero is a guy who's all over

Disney stuff.

He makes these YouTube videos and he just makes up, he lies about stuff.

He says it's true, but it's not.

I'm going to read you guys just a few.

Jimmy Kimmel says the worst thing in years.

This is embarrassing.

Uh-oh.

Robert De Niro says the worst thing in decades with instant regret.

Oh, fuck.

Robert De Niro fired by studio after the worst comments go viral.

Oh, my God.

Robert De Niro's been fired by the studio?

Like, as if that's some, you know what I mean?

Like, oh, fuck.

What's he going to do?

His career will never recover.

Like, what's this 82-year-old Oscar winner going to do now?

They made him clean out his desks.

He was walking home with a banker's box.

He's like, fucking, it was like kind of a rainy day, and he was walking too close to the sidewalk, and a bus came by and sprayed a bunch of water from a puddle onto him.

George Clooney says the worst thing in history.

This is a disgrace.

Okay, so it's Jimmy Kimmel, worst thing yet.

Then above that is worst thing like yet.

And then worst thing in history, that is, they're just

keeping they keep outdoing themselves with these things, you know what I mean?

They're crazy because there's another one here from three days ago, Jimmy Kimmel, mental breakdown after losing millions of dollars now.

Oh, fuck, he's probably in trouble financially, I'm guessing.

Oh, fuck.

Okay, we'll look into it.

Whoopi Goldberg yells at Disney with instant regret.

This is embarrassing.

Okay, let's Brian, let's skip it.

It's official.

Disney just launched, lost billions of dollars.

Brian, let's get back to the thing.

Anyway, once Disney bastardizes something, it's never the same.

Disney was racist, now it's repulsively woke.

That's where the person takes the stance that Disney was racist at one time, which that's a woke stance to take, isn't it?

No, he no, no, he was happy when it was racist.

Oh, okay.

He thought it was good.

That's meant in a positive way.

Okay.

Alan says,

he's a former handyman.

Weird thing to call yourself.

He goes, I don't know.

That's the trend.

All the episodes end up being about Lisa and her ever more aggressive and humorless activism.

She has always been.

There's literally an activist Lisa episode every season of the show since the beginning.

Or if not activists, it's her against the system.

Like, it's always, I know

I'm shouting into the void.

This is meaningless.

I know that.

I know, but

this is incorrect about Lisa.

Yeah.

And she's made to suffer.

Everyone hates her and she doesn't win.

So if you hate Lisa, you're going to love Lisa episodes.

You guys are going to love these last three here.

First of all, Zach just says, yeah, Disney ruins everything.

Screw seasons 31 and up.

I'll just stick to re-watching every season before the Disney era.

Well, you're going to watch them on Disney, so it doesn't even fucking matter.

Disney doesn't give a shit where you watch them.

So 20 through 30 great seasons to this guy.

But everything, the last five years, that's the bad Simpsons.

Wow.

This guy's only going to, he only gets to watch 30 seasons of it.

He's making a sacrifice for his principles.

You know what I mean?

He's like, you guys, we're all sitting here like, you know, we're not doing shit.

This guy's like, I'm only going to watch fucking, I'm only going to watch 680 of these episodes or maybe more, 710 of these episodes.

That sounds right.

Raymond says, I grew up on The Simpsons, and not only are they so annoyingly woke these days.

Here we go.

This is one I know is funny.

Not only are they so annoyingly woke these days, but what's with all that musical crap?

That actually plays into the whole woke crap, I guess.

No doubt, new extreme feminist and simp writers driving through their own personal narratives.

Sigh.

Wasn't one of the most famous episodes, a musical episode about a monorail?

Oh, yeah, the monorail episode.

Yeah, before the 90s ended, there were two complete soundtracks based on full of songs from the show.

Yeah, there was a lot of music through the show, even when I watched it, definitely.

But it

why is that part of woke as well?

I think

musicals are

inherently woke.

Oh, it's gay.

I think they're saying.

I forgot that that.

I forgot that's what they're saying is that it's gay.

And then if it and gay is woke.

Yeah.

It's not even like they're Hamilton musicals, but again, it's like, I, you know, we, you mentioned the Simpsons movie.

I remember this was another smart one Bob noticed first was that the Simpsons movie, for all the Simpsons predicted it, the Simpsons movie predicted that Hillary would win in 2007.

Like that she would be.

She did.

In the popular vote.

And she went.

Wrong year, Chris.

Sorry, I just met Hillary.

Obama.

Everybody knows.

Everybody knows that.

I mean, we don't talk about Alexis.

we don't talk politics on here, but Chris's big I'm still with her.

I'm still with her.

I'm still with her.

Yeah, he's a big Democratic donor.

I live in Canada.

I donate illegally to the American Democratic Party.

Yes.

He loves them.

Last one, last message.

This is from Sonal,

S-O-N-A-L.

And he says, notice how The Simpsons' wokeness was racist.

They cut Apu from the show because he's Indian.

Never mind that real Indians love him and don't find him offensive at all.

Indians don't care if he's voiced by a white American actor, they don't mind him working at the quickie mart.

Apu was a real character, not a racial caricature, unlike characters like Groundskeeper Willie and Luigi Risotto.

Since the Simpsons makes fun of everything and everything, what's wrong with the show making fun of Indians?

Wait a second.

I don't, I wouldn't say that Luigi Risotto is a caricature.

Thank you.

Listen, Italians love it, though.

Yeah, that's like they love it when guys are like, oh, I'm a mia.

I'm sure you can find a lot of, you know, Indian people and Indian American people who don't care, but there's probably people who do care about it.

And I think it's just like a general idea.

I don't know.

I'm not smart, but it's just like a general idea of like, it's probably good.

We have plenty of actors of all different backgrounds now to just, you know, give opportunities to have them voiced accurately by the people who I think that's generally a good thing to do.

But yeah,

also

they didn't get rid of him because he was Indian, right?

No, they got rid of him because he was voiced by a white guy, right?

Yeah, Dan Kazaria, right?

But why didn't they just have him voiced by, did they get rid of him?

Is that true?

Or did they just have him voiced by someone else?

I think he's mostly gone from the show.

There was no ex a poo leaving the show kind of episode.

They just realized, well, this is a relic of when the show was created and it's uncomfortable to look at him and talk about him.

We're not going to retest him.

He's just going to go away forever.

You'll see him walking around silently in the background at times, but I think it's been a long time since he spoke.

I think they see it's just a third rail.

They don't want to touch anymore.

They recast many characters, but I think with Apu, they're like, but I'm shocked it took this long in the stuff you've had, Brian, to see somebody complaining about Apu being not in the show anymore.

I knew that was going to happen because I know about the movie, which I didn't see, but I do know about the movie.

I did go to a party that W.

Kamal Bell was at.

Do you mean the movie, like the Pooh movie?

Yeah, the one by W.

Kamal Bell, right?

No.

Well, he produced it.

He produced it, but it's what's his name?

Yeah, the comedian.

Okay.

I made a fucking, we made an ass out of ourselves at some party because there was an open bar for the nib.

Do you guys remember the nib?

Oh, yeah.

No.

It was a cartoon website website and it was launching in 2016.

And when we were in,

when we were in

Philly for the convention, we were all nasty and sweaty and gross and had been sleeping on a floor and doing drugs all week.

But then there was

Brad or were you with like

him and Stefan and Will, Felix and Matt and Rob Wissman and there's a ton of us.

Yeah.

And we all walked in there and everybody by the five minutes after being in there are standing around with two drinks in their hand, just drinking.

And I didn't drink.

I just got high.

I was just really high on drugs.

Responsible.

What kind of drugs?

Probably not pills at this time because I was still kind of being like, I shouldn't do pills back then.

Now I'm like, I should probably do some pills.

I love them.

Just to be clear, though, only when you're away and you're not like, because people do, I think they get concerned, like when you had your broken foot and you were sort of making up your own schedule of how to take your painkillers and people do maybe worry.

So just to be clear, you don't, you don't

yes.

Well, it's not weird.

It's indicative of somebody who

has a, is addicted to pills, perhaps.

Oh, no, I just wanted to get as high as possible with the, I wanted to like get as fucked up on OxyContin as possible with the amount that I had.

I didn't have like

a lot.

Oh, okay.

I misunderstood.

Yeah, no, no.

That's totally fine.

All right.

I just like, give me six.

Give me, you give me six.

You give me nine of them.

I'm going to do three at a time instead of spreading them throughout the day.

Like, what does that even do for anybody?

It keeps the pain away for the day.

Not for me.

It doesn't.

Well, you didn't take them, so you had to endure the pain for the entire day.

So that you, in fact, endured a lot of physical pain in order to get high.

I have a high threshold.

Well, thank you guys for doing the show.

I am currently searching for the Bart Tracy shirt, and I think I'm going to purchase it.

I didn't know about it.

I found it for $94, but it's a woman's shirt.

So that's not going to work for me.

We once,

somebody at a live show we went to brought in a classic like Bart 420 shirt from like 1990 or 91, and they asked us to sign it and we did it, but we were like, really?

Like this is this is a work of art.

You don't want our signatures on this.

I do the same thing when, when somebody, when we had posters we were selling, and they'd be like, sign this.

And I was like, I, I think, uh, I think it'd be better without my signature on it, you know.

And no one's ever asked me to sign anything.

It happens.

I'm fine.

I'm seeing Air Simpson do the Bartman.

Yeah, I'm going to find a Simpsons, a bootleg Simpsons shirt and spend an absurd amount of money on it.

Do you guys have anything you want to plug?

Like, well, you have Talking Simpsons, but anything else or that?

Mainly Talking Simpsons.

If you like our Simpsons, our Vast Simpsons knowledge that is not embarrassing, we are not Simpsons guys, but we talk about them and we can help you translate them.

Check out Talking Simpsons and the Patreons, patreon.com slash talking Simpsons.

All the podcasts are there

ad-free.

We've been doing this.

We're in our 10th year now.

So we've covered so many of the episodes and we also do episodes about shows like Futurama and King of the Hill and The Critic and Mission Hill and other animated sitcoms like that.

I've been on the hill.

I love King of the Hill.

I love King of the Hill.

King of the Hill is

the best shit ever.

I have been on the show.

I always have fun.

And

yeah, listen to the show.

Yeah, if you're not Simpsons guys, but they are frustrated with the depiction of Lisa Simpson.

A little bit.

She's just a little bit getting too much screen time, is what they told us before.

But the

you guys are from the left.

That's how we see it.

That's smart.

That's the way I do, too.

If you want to, I think it would be a good.

Where would you, if someone wanted to get back into The Simpsons, do you know what I mean?

Like they're like, oh, I've lapsed or whatever, like since the late 90s.

I want to get into modern Simpsons.

Is there any advice you'd have?

Oh, boy.

I mean, the Triass of Horrors are usually pretty good.

They usually put a lot of energy into making those funny and high concept.

I don't know.

I feel like the recent season premiere, it's called Bart's Birthday.

It's pretty inspired.

It's not like a normal episode but it shows you that they're trying to do a lot of new things i don't know i did i did hear that they did a thing that was like pretty clever it was like a series finale maybe that's like that's it yeah yeah and it's funny yeah

it's funny because there were several posts on no homer of people saying i don't like what they're doing with the new

series because they did not understand that it was a joke that they were doing a series finale.

They don't get high concepts anymore, anymore, but that's mainly mainly that is if you're if you watch Simpsons from the last three or four years, most of the best ones are high concept episodes, though it also is them taking big swings that don't always hit, but uh, they they have they at least are having fun and are being creative as opposed to just uh kind of stagnating for for a bit.

Like, uh, wow, wow, yeah, what the fuck

Brian on eBay just pulled up his shirt.

It says, crack kills San Felipe, Mexico.

And Bart is stuck in a gigantic woman's ass.

And what is he saying?

I can't read it.

He says, just say no, dude.

To crack.

I guess.

Oh, that's fun.

And on your Patreon, do you guys, you guys ever talk about

spending money on like really stupid shit, like a bunch of money on stupid shit?

So the people who are giving you money to listen to your thinking here that you're going to buy a bunch of dumb stuff.

I try to hide my shameful purchases.

Yeah,

that's a way to go with it.

Definitely.

I do too.

I'm the most guilty of it, I suppose, but I've, I

should say, like, Brian, I'm going to need to ask you for tips on being a Lego person because I have not bought this.

This was gifted to me, though, by my husband.

Oh, this is heavy.

Oh, I was.

Oh, I have that.

I have that.

That's a beautiful set.

It's very good.

Daily Bugle Lego set of all the Spider-Man characters at the Daily Bugle.

My husband just gave this to me.

It's a very nice set.

It's a very nice set.

It's a good set.

I have it.

I had to disassemble it, and I'm using it for parts now.

Yeah, and I would.

It's a fun build.

I would suggest that as well.

It's like you build it, but then I'd say, like, you know, strip it and see if you could do a little mock.

You know what I mean?

I'm not a Lego guy.

Like, this is the first

adult Lego set I've been gifted.

So,

yeah,

it's your own creation, basically.

I'm working now on like a big, tall mountain from Lord of the Rings.

And when I'm done with that, the X-Men 97 mansion, I already have it in the waiting.

So that's.

See, this is the bad.

I don't, I have no space.

I am surrounded by DVDs and Blu-rays.

I have no space.

Oh, I don't have any room either.

Scared.

I'm going to tell you what, Henry.

I don't have any room either.

I have the Titanic in my bedroom right now, just sitting on a thing.

So

believe me.

Yes, check out Talking Simpsons wherever you listen.

Yeah, I really appreciate both you guys coming on this time.

It was really great to have you.

Yeah, thank you.

Thanks for doing it, guys.

We love you.

Goodbye.

Bye.