Here Comes the Guillotine Live in Edinburgh - Part 1

Here Comes the Guillotine contains offensive language, mature content, and adult themes.

It is not suitable for a younger audience.

This is a Global Player Original Podcast.

Hey, how are you doing?

This is Producer Andy, and welcome to Here Comes the Guillotine Live with Frankie Boyle, Susie McCabe, and Christopher MacArthur Boyd from the Edinburgh Playhouse.

Hope you enjoy.

Please put your hands together for Susie McKay.

Hello, Edinburgh.

You seem a bit excited.

Oh, you have been in the pub since fucking two o'clock.

This is why we didn't have a show on a Saturday in Glasgow, because they couldn't be trusted.

We thought, oh, we can trust Edinburgh.

Oh,

turns out fife is in.

Told you,

one family, 40 folk.

Bring on your banjo.

Listen, thank you, thank you so much for coming.

This is our third live show.

Let's be honest, it'll probably be the fucking last.

The fact that this podcast has lasted over a year and we've won an award.

Trust me, we were as surprised as everybody else.

Even the guy giving out the award was like, what the fuck?

Really?

A Bible John Cum based podcast

with a lesbian and two of the worst street men you'll ever meet.

One of them says camp is the lion from the wizard of fucking Oz,

and the other one's just a wee guy.

Just a wee guy.

But listen, thanks so much for listening.

It is, it's genuinely been one of the most fun things to do.

Be able to come out and do it live as well.

It's been great.

So, with no further ado, I am going to bring on my two colleagues.

We're going to spend.

What's going to happen is we're going to do like 45 minutes, things will get a break.

So don't worry, you don't need to sit there cross-legged, right?

You'll get a break, but you know the rules if you go to the toilet, fuck you, right?

Right, so what will happen is we'll have our first 45 minutes, we'll have an interval, you can get your drinks, go to the toilet, come back, and we'll have our second 45 minutes and we'll have a guest and we'll have a mailbag.

Now, you've seen the QR code,

right?

Get your mailbags in.

That's going to disappear during the show, but will reappear at the interval.

And we have got producer Andy

monitoring.

Everyone's favourite Canadian heartthrob.

I mean, just a product, right?

So, can you believe that Andy?

God love him, right?

Don't hold this against them.

But you all listening to the podcast, can you believe that our producer is actually a Rangers fan?

Fucking relax.

You'll offend fife.

Right, so with no further ado, I'm going to get the boys on.

Ladies, gentlemen, and all who are in between, please welcome to the stage Christopher McAlver Boyd.

Yes.

Yes.

Good evening.

What's fucking happening, man?

Fucking love Edinburgh.

Lions.

Tell me to lie and start.

Fucking love this place.

It's cold fucking winds coming off the sea and all the banks that are situated here and all the fucking cunts that live here.

I like it.

You fucking love it.

Do you remember you asked me to find three things about Edinburgh that I loved?

Yes.

And you told me that you love, wait for it, the gelato seat.

What does that even fucking mean?

It means Mary's milk bar.

It means Lucas.

You see?

You see that?

You're such a weak guy.

Somebody's talking about that, and I showed them a hat I'm wearing on the way here.

It's from Dublin.

We went to that great ice cream place from Dingle.

And I got the hat with the ice cream.

I like ice cream, man.

He's very food-motivated.

He's like a restaurant dog.

He's like a Labrador, isn't he?

That's been handed back to the dogs trust.

I feel more like a wee Scotty dog.

You know, the ones with the big heads and the wee turp collar.

What's your mic on?

Your tongue?

Oh, yeah, Mike's fun.

Or you mixed him.

Cheers, man.

Fucking Playhouse man.

The only time I've been here is Punner Rate it was Marty Pello.

I fucking love Marty Boone here.

I worked against Marty, right?

Who's booing Marty?

Marty Pellow.

He's on Instagram now and he's always got three buttons and a bit like

if it gives me memories of you know when your dad had to get out of bed suddenly because there was trouble you know

it's like your dad and your granddad there's somebody at the door asking for fucking money

for that but Marty Pellow did a show in here it was like the witches of Eastwick and he was fucking brilliant right so he comes out at the start he does a whole practice he does a whole song and his song's I'm Jack right it's the witches of Eastwell I'm Jack and he freshens just went I'm Jack and it's brilliant

dies applause dies down a guy in France just goes you're Marty Pell

I fucking nearly washed his hair once

what yeah I used to I used to work at my dad's hairdressers and one day a big bodyguard came in and went is there space for a special guest and my dad was like alright and then who walks in?

Marty Pell.

I need to work out what bit of his career was this?

Is this long hair?

This is after the heroin.

It's good to get a new haircut after the heroine, but I mean

let's leave that era behind, what a new dude.

Yeah.

My dad was the fucking vanguard of that movement.

So yeah, I was about to wash him and then one of the more senior stylists cut in and went, No, fucking wash his hair.

I was like, Alright, I'm ready.

Was that stylist a woman?

Yeah.

I fucking, yeah.

Woman, I've done a thing for Cash for Kids.

I've done a couple of kind of charity kicks for them at Christmas.

And I've got a mate who fucking loves Marty Pellow, right?

Like, used to dog school and walk about Clyde Bank looking for Marty Pellow, like an absolute fucking reverse notes.

I wouldn't like to use that phrase as a defence.

So, anyway,

I get two tickets.

I get two tickets to go to this site, and it was a party with Marty, right?

At the Radisson Reds Hotel now.

I'm not gonna lie, I am not a big white man.

Pop to nobody is.

One does protest too much.

But my mate loved the mate, so we went and we were there.

I am not joking, we were in a room with a hundred women.

I was the youngest by at least 15 fucking years.

I have, you could smell the fucking pheromones, man.

They were sharing HRT and he, oh, fuck, he came on the stage and I was like, he's going to need fucking bodyguards, man.

These These women are going to fucking devour this turf.

Look at your little face.

I said, these women are going to fucking devour Marty Pellow till there's nothing left but a carcass of Marty Pelo.

And I've never seen anything like it in my life.

I was fucking disgusted.

And I told somebody, got myself a Marty Pelo haircut.

Told everybody, angelise.

If you had to,

if you had to fuck a man in a pinch,

Marty,

I think would be very tender.

He's got a lovely smile.

A wonderful smile.

Beautiful voice.

One of the things that always attracts you is.

That's what I'd make it my mission.

If I made love to Marty, would be to take that fucking smile off his face.

Button your fucking shut up.

But I don't know where to go.

Yeah, who would that shout?

John Cena.

A challenge?

A challenge?

For him to come.

I think you can do that without your notes.

But a Mission Impossible style thing is we rip up a harness

in his repelling.

And get dangled with Pinocchio downstairs.

Listen, I tried it once, a movie Great Dad

It's honestly,

it's not like,

you know, one can spot a good little guy, like, look at these two alphas, right?

But you know, like,

I just, I love guys, I love the company, I love all that, but just, oh, it's the penis thing.

It's fucking bogging, isn't it?

Like, say if the penis was as good as what guys, like, think it is,

there would you wouldn't be popping wood right?

It's fucking

what aspect of it is all of it!

They fucking big dangly boss and

fucking it's not like not all not all guys are clean, you know what I mean?

There's a hygiene thing going on there as well.

Well as it's revealed on the podcast, Christopher is clean shaven

like a fucking unit like a

I mean, it sounds like my balls have been shaved off.

Maybe

you are Shubaka in the winds.

Huh?

I'm just a Be Wilding project.

I never heard the fucking concept of shaving your boss.

Like until Christopher brought it up.

Well.

Imagine you've got your dash shaving his boss.

Is that interesting?

That will now be a rite of passage for young people.

So home I'm assuming his boys is like

apparently the pubes are coming back, have you heard that?

Apparently that's that's going to be the fashion generation alpha.

They want pubes, they want bedding.

Fucking love generation alpha.

That's the way you do it.

Have you ever seen any players?

See I have.

Oh fuck here's a cracker.

So

when I was with my then girlfriend we came to see Le Miz in the opening night, and she fucking loved musical theatre.

And as you can imagine, I don't.

But we came in the opening night of Le Miz, and it was a really big production.

And we came in and we were sat really nice seats in the stalls, and there were these three massive Glasgow women

sat behind us as Edinburgh was out in its finery.

And my

now ex-wife loved loved this loved this musical and we came in we sat down and just as we took our seats I had these three big Glasgow women just went

apparently that Susan Boyles song I dreamed I dreamed was so popular they fired it into this show

and I watched someone who I knew was in love with and is one of the most passive people I've ever met nearly drop kick

three

morbidly abese Glasgow women

fucking glorious.

I was like, ah, what a croc of all shite.

And then

it's so long, that fucking show goes on for days,

fucking days.

And we got to the end of it, we were about 90 minutes in, like a full fucking game of football.

And I'm out there and I'm having a cigarette and she went hijacking her legs and I went, ah, I'm sure it'll be fine.

Because I had paid zero attention to what was going on.

He's just a crock of old shit.

Do you ever hear a story and think, well, that's fucking Scotland down to a T?

Right.

Someone told me they lived near Susan Boyle in what's in Blackburn.

Bathgate.

Bathburn.

No, Blackburn.

Is it Blackburn?

There's a place called Blackburn in Scotland.

Except this.

See if I train this little fruit.

Christopher doesn't know it.

She had a she had weak eyes, we'd come around and wind her up because she'd a bit of a temper.

So they'd go in and try and get a rise at the Susan Boyle, and her nickname locally was Ramble.

It'd be like, oh yeah, that is Scottish small town life.

I seen the

Rocky horror show in here when I was 13.

Pretty fucking...

That much for a 13-year-old.

For fuck's sake, people are getting upset about mixing up toilets, but 13-year-olds are going to see Rocky.

Look at this one to be our shade.

13?

And I've seen Joseph in the technical living coat here when I was a wee boy.

Frankie has just told me his Joseph theory

backstage.

Joseph was the closeted homosexual in that family.

And the whole show is a metaphor for what gay people can add to the heterosexual experience.

Rainbow jackets.

The

gay people

predict the future from dreams.

If you let them.

Susie, what's going on?

Listen, what will happen is we'll just have rainbow jackets and some nice soft furnishings of the cat.

But yeah, what's the story of?

I didn't even remember that.

I was too busy 85.

The story of Joseph and the Mesidincon Dreamco is that Joseph

has

visions

and he makes himself a dream coat, gets a bit fucking above himself.

His brothers get annoyed, throw him down a well.

What?

If you had brothers, you'd know.

He gets thrown down a well, he gets taken in by the old pharaoh.

And he says to the pharaoh, you know, you're going to have seven

years of plenty, then, because he's interpreting his dream, then you're going to have seven rough years.

Maybe start storing some grain.

This goes down really well.

And he becomes quite a powerful figure, and then he is able to lord it over his brothers and then denumo.

Wow.

So it's basically do well enough, and you can go back to your family home and go ha ha ha, you're fucking a wax.

Which is what the three of us are ultimately trying to achieve.

It's basically rescue.

That's the same story as rescue really, isn't it, your ladies?

I've bought visions.

The song rescue?

Rescue?

Yes.

What?

I fucking don't know either.

Was he a dancer?

He's not even a dancer in a fucking song.

All songs have a

dance to songs.

You know the box to that song.

He was a cat, he could really crawl.

He was a mystic in the Russian core.

He had a massive penis and was fucking everyone.

Michael Kane, in his book of titbits that I read when I was a child, not a lot of people know that, said Rasputin's penis is preserved in a museum in St.

Petersburg and is 18 inches by 4.

Fuck,

that's like Ted Joyce.

Fuck him!

It's like

18 inches.

Fucking, I'm so glad I'm a real lesbian.

18 inches.

Extraordinary alcohol, though, so maybe it's like tequila worm and it's soaked the stuff up.

That's the ultimate end to your party.

Let's eat Risputon's cock.

Let's do Shaws and Risput's cock flu and

marine choice.

So that was too funny.

Oh well.

So why did they write a song about Bonnie M, was it?

People write songs about a lot of things.

Yeah, no.

Maybe it was Bonie M's Muse.

Who knows?

Wow.

Thank you so much for coming out to Zee.

We've got this part of the show.

This has been the kinda local part stage.

Yeah, the Russian court always very popular.

Always down a hat at the street, bit of the old players.

Let's get into the playhouse, start talking about the fucking Russian court man.

Couple of squids from the Bible.

And I've had a Marty Pebble.

Oh, you came back.

I scared fucking Avon.

I went to uni here.

Christopher.

What?

Uni?

You fucking went went to Napier or something?

Napier's the university are people that were only allowed to do science and not proper science subjects.

Travelling, tourism.

I went to Napier

for nine months.

Then I dropped out.

I stayed in a Riego Street.

Pretty much zone.

Loved with a Russian drug dealer, actually.

And you still don't know who Russian Newton is?

You never brought it up.

He was studying business

and he was fucking making some money.

We were lucky, it was cool.

But yeah, shall we move on to the next one?

We do have some structure to be sure.

I know you're starting to panic.

But we quite have a bit in this half where we'll look at is it like some quotes that Andy, the Paris bun, had you built up

everyone's favourite Paris bun, not me.

Andy's got some quotes, producer Andy from the mailbag, he's got some quotes that he's dug out of the episode.

We're going to try and guess who said the quote.

So let's hit this Andy with quote number one.

Quote number one is, I've got knee teeth in that royal.

Strokes are just God's way of trying to stop bulls.

Sounds like me.

What could that possibly mean?

But you know old cats are always bowling.

And then the stroke is an illness almost specifically designed to stop you bowling.

It made you list over to one side and unable to aim at a jack.

And God's just fucking had enough.

He's looking around and said, for fuck's sake, stop.

Do something useful.

Put on a fucking musical.

Do something.

Strokes.

I think old people should do Joseph and the Amazon Technical of Dream Coin instead of old bowling.

Yes.

Yeah, I think I'd love to see an old old people fucking.

Musical.

You know how at the theatre on a Wednesday afternoon it's normally all old people and it stinks a bit.

Maybe what we could do is reverse that and get all the old people on stage and we just sit and look at them them fucking raging the way that they would look at us because that's what they do.

And that pension on Wednesday at the theatre, have you ever been to that?

It's fucking bleak, man.

It's like God's waiting room, they've got a fucking priest known standby.

Coffins lined up.

Old people are wild, man.

Sometimes I think

I don't

sounded like you were about to do a reverse video there.

It is

the one

Scottish man.

I refused to sponsors.

Can you believe it?

Like

a lot of companies.

The only people who've ever created sponsors were Howarth Bespoke Furnishings.

Shout out to Howarth Brown.

Shout out to Howarth for it.

Howth!

We tried to make it happen.

Do you know?

They make lovely, lovely products, Howarth.

So give them a big follow on Instagram.

This is an example of what it would be like if you were sponsored.

Do you know what I mean?

The kind of fucking shilling we make.

He has to wound the size of Rasputin's wood, that's all.

What would your dream sponsor be?

My dream sponsor.

As you know, Chubo Viagra.

So you can just have it on the go all the time, stick it under your desk,

get back on it.

Under your desk?

Maybe your desk?

Hide in my reaction.

How often bespoke furnishings have been a

direction behind the desk with a fucking

tune young module?

Do you know what they're saying?

Saying that, right?

There was a programme on Channel 4 last night about

it was like open house, right?

And it was about couples going into the swinging, right?

And like developing, they all live in this house together and they do things and they fucking develop and see if they can open up their relationship for swinging.

And they're like, yeah, I'm 23 and 25.

And I'm like, fuck, if you're having to spice up your sex life at 23, you should probably just join a fucking monastery.

If it shines at 23, fucking hell.

Do you know what I mean?

Why should you be 23 and you're like, oh, what do you let's spice up our sex life?

We've been together nine months.

Get it, fuck out that relationship.

We were driving past a chippy around the corner and you said it was a swinging chippy.

Legally, I don't know how far away this chippy is.

Might have been quite quite a way away.

Oh, it was on the way here as well, Edinburgh, but it was.

A swinging chippy.

And you said one of your balls went?

They could explain this.

Well, apparently, they had a flat, the chippy, and all the chippy workers went there and kind of took ecstasy and fucked each other.

I don't know if that's a swinging chippy, but just a charmy fratios.

Christopher said in a very wistful voice that I'd love to fuck someone that smelled the chips.

There's no one but that I don't believe.

Fucking loves a chippy nobody else he loves a saucy supper.

I'd say a lot of people have fucked up smelled of chips.

Certainly by the end.

I'm on icebreak for the 90s.

I used to go to the chippy around the corner for the gay clubs in Glasgow and pull that as fucking was my level.

You like some chips and cheese there.

Me Me and Susie were trying to write a sit-cong together, and

one of the scenes in the second episode was Susie and a chippy with a broken heart, and then this beautiful lesbian comes in, and then they do the lady and the tramp, but with a sausage sucker.

He's saying this again.

If someone has been married twice, it's a fucking worst situation, so

do it.

And we're we're trying to get invades, we'll see.

Would you fucking make a TV programme with us to, Jesus?

But yeah, I used to go to that chippy and buy cigarettes.

Let's get the next boat up.

I don't even remember my speech saints.

Fritz will get a double portion of Hello Fresh delivered for just one guy, that's alarm bells.

This must be Christopher, because often we miss stuff Christopher says, he just slips it in under the radar, like he's fucking riding John Cena.

What?

What does that even mean?

Personally, I look quite happy with myself.

Oh man, it's been a big issue with the breakup and living alone.

Has been, you know, I used to get gusto to live with, but the minimum order for a gusto is two people.

And people are like, well, why don't you just order it and then make it and then freeze half of it and eat it the next day?

As if that's not the most fucking depressing thing ever.

Eating two, one half and then the second half of a fucking spaghetti bolognese that you've made by hand.

What the packets?

The spaghetti of the woman who no longer loves

gold, please.

There's an army of giant wild boar that are at some point poised to descend on the lands.

This had so many fucking weird guys.

Oh, and that's why Scotland has to legalise guns.

That's what

the

mentalness of middle-aged men to that clip was fucking mental.

It was like, well, virtually you're incorrect, and I will tell you why.

Get defucked.

I mean, have a wank and give everybody peace.

This was something we heard about.

We were on a mini break together in Avi Moore.

Susie and I decided to have a wee break from Life's Troubles.

From Christopher?

Christopher.

Christopher was invited.

He wasn't.

They wanted to join us, did they?

Obviously, you two old bastards can fuck all of us.

I'd have to say that.

I'd love to go away with my strange friends.

We had a hot tub.

A hot tub?

We might quan bike and we'd sat in a hot tub together and then at night we would lie on the sofa and watch The Limps of the Lock on BBC I Twin.

Shout out to the limbs of the lock.

Did you just do a shout out to William Begg?

Oh,

not directly to him.

People are saying, oh,

a pig, a farm pig, will turn into a moor if you just leave it.

I don't think that's true.

People are saying it.

People say a lot.

Like, the problem is that, like, pretty much if I get pigs in an abattoir, they always fucking escape.

There's always some who fucking jump off the lorry or whatever.

They get out, they shag wild corn and they produce a hybrid that our copyright instructor told us.

John.

John.

And John loved that picture.

Kept taking pictures of this thing.

It was minus fucking eight.

We were in the forests surrounding Abbeymore and he was telling us about sustainability of trees and taking pictures of us on these quad pics.

I am a type two diuretic,

I've got fucking toes and fingers left.

He was a lovely man, very knowledgeable, but fuck he was boring.

He felt there was a large army of these hybrid boar pigs, poised to descend on Inverness in the near future.

And having played Inverness twice on the last tour, I support these pigs.

You genuinely fucking hate Inverness!

I don't hate them, I just think there must be something that makes them laugh, and maybe being disemboweled by a hybrid pig war

might be that thing, as I've tried everything else.

I like it.

Remember, we went to Lady's bookshop.

It was a nice bookshop.

That's enough.

That was soon being trampled into the dark by the hoops of 25 stone packs.

You're wanting repressed religious lesbians who are like, I can't have a relationship with with you, and you're like, that's a travesty.

What a catch!

For fuck's sake!

What were you talking about, Sue?

I have no fucking idea.

Repressed religion.

Was this this island of nuns?

Oh, is this the Mary of the Glow Festival?

Who thinks we should go to that?

It's Christopher's holding it up, much like Abby Moore.

I'm shrinking.

With Mary from Dunlow?

If you don't know this, Dunlow is a town in the middle of fucking nowhere, Donegal,

where they have a kind of Father Ted style, lovely girls' festival every year called Mary from Dunlow.

And we were telling our Irish tour manager about this, because you have like a Glasgow Mary, there'll be a Glasgow Mary next year, an Edinburgh Mary, there'll be New York Mary, all that kind of stuff.

And all the Irish people in the south of Ireland that we told this to fell a bit laughing because for them, Mary is a euphemism for vagina.

So you've got your Mary and your Mickey.

There's a June appearance.

But also, Daniel Adoro's the head judge.

Well, I mean, a couple of days at the end of July, before the start of the end, we're a friend, Sir Christopher, before we come through here and sell our souls for a fucking month.

and when you go to the Mary of Dungalow Festival in Brillax in Dunning, is it Dunning Hall?

Can't you say that was the most seamless French vlog I ever

sell?

I have a fucking load of seasons.

I think it's a great option.

I think that's probably what's up to do with that.

Right, okay.

Thanks, Quark, please.

Jesus was a shit.

Jesus was fucking doing that pumpkin.

Frankie.

You, motherfucker.

Yes, sir.

What?

Oh.

Some of these poems they're disgusted.

Is that the one?

I'm not one for any other man in the everlasting Spoken like a true Catholic lesbian.

The only Pope we'll have entrusted to dead is Christ.

Do you remember Jesus used to appear at the Waynes and stuff and they would give the secret to the Pope?

Imagine the secret was that you fucking

had a wee fiddle.

Is this reverse pedo coming back again?

Yeah,

I uh

well he used to get his feet washed, you know,

Holy Thursday, son.

Holy Thursday.

What does that mean?

Holy Thursday is the day before Good Friday, huh?

And

there's a service in the pineapple in the chapel where people get their feet washed because that was all part of that, all part of that Easter story.

Ah, yeah, again, you'll be prodigy.

Mary Magdalene.

So people said to Jesus,

why don't you do more stuff for the poor, blah blah blah.

Why is this happening?

Jesus goes, The poor will always be with you, and Mary Magdalene washes his feet in olive oil, which seemed pretty wild.

Although Beth will feel fucking great after it, it's essentially a food massage.

Sophia Lorraine used to use olive oil soap.

Don't ask me how I know this.

I don't know if it's just a gay thing that we get told this information when we're coming through.

She used to use sequence.

Come in, what?

The sequence is the gay ranks.

The gay ranks.

You'd have to work for your promotion.

I didn't know there was a circuit.

She's a criminal of Lesbianism.

Well, of course, you don't know that you need work care bakers.

You're a fucking white street man, if you have a wife.

It's exhausting.

I was going to say something, but I remembered I've never had a job once.

So.

I

imagine getting an olive oil foot job off of Jesus.

Oh my god.

Imagine the cost of that now, the price of olive oil.

Fucking hell.

It's 10.50 from Tesco's old brand.

Bertoglio or whatever it's called.

What's it called?

Bertogli?

What's it called?

Wouldn't say good olive oil called?

I'm the last country shooting.

Fucking a lot of oil, brandy.

I'm frying a sauce.

Jesus normal oil is Tesco.

You know, it's too bad.

Jeppy round the corner that I'm frying a sauce.

suspension

to see the fucking good one.

I wouldn't try to buy cigarettes.

I was like, I would like a twin deck of Marlborough gold.

Don't let this guy go to the AKB sex drunk.

He just seemed like to walk off.

If you approached a band thinking you were dealing with a twit, you might find yourself in deep water.

So I like Christopher.

Would you say Twitter?

I wouldn't say Twit, Christopher.

I don't like it.

I'm no rogued owl, so I wouldn't use the word twitter.

No, but you do like ice cream.

Oh, I like ice cream, yeah.

I think probably the word twit had already come up.

Do you know what I mean?

Neither of us none of us are twit sayers.

Whoa!

Roged out himself.

And you look like fucking Twitter.

Fucking it.

I like looking at the different stages of your hair and beard growth.

Basically, I just let it go until someone goes, for fuck's sake, and then I shave all up.

That's my sister.

What stage are we at now?

This is early days.

That's a spring haircut.

I have some days with a woman who likes the beard and he's like, grow the beard back.

And I'm like, well, I've nothing else to offer, so

I'm gonna be looking like fucking God by the time they are.

Aristotle.

Just to clarify, it is not the Nazi.

Sadly not.

Because I know that you guys are going to wonder if that's a fucking Nazi.

No.

The Nazi build.

It's five days when the Nazis are turning their back when you're fighting.

It's like, well fucking they're done for how much.

The Nazi must be having a great time now with the rise of fascism across the world.

She's not hating it.

She was, you know, she was in many ways perfect.

But that one fatal flaw.

Just

some

quite controversial views about

history.

Things that we would generally agree on.

She felt there was room for doubt.

You know, I don't know.

You like a project, I guess.

That would have been a major, major project.

That would have been like a two-part on grand designs.

It was just a result of you sitting in the room, fucking shaking, botless and penniless, that would have been it, just sitting there, because she fucking leather jay.

She was a physically powerful woman.

Still is.

She might have been here tonight, who knows?

Surprise, surprise.

It was still a black Black and Nancy the whole time.

She didn't get assassinated by the Sky, she reinvented herself with a new pace of fascism.

If you're not up to date with episodes of the podcast, Scylla Black was assassinated by the SCIS guy.

And on that note, I think we've ended the first half.

I don't know if we have.

I think we have one to go.

One more to go?

One more to go?

Let's share it.

I'd love to punch out a thatcher panel.

So we'll share and pop.

Would you not love to though?

Just fucking

shout everywhere, cuck everywhere.

This is why I don't get invited to the sex champion.

Where would you want to do it?

Can I also just say these fucking things that we're wearing the lanyard is given away where we actually fucking recognize?

You can work out anyway because I've already said we share an office with Shapeshift or Descartes.

So if you follow Desney's base form

you can find the entrance to our office.

Also if you just think about every restaurant we would say that's within a three minute walk or

lazy.

Think about how lazy we are and how close are the restaurants to go to that.

Feel free as I say me I've kind of had it off.

I think it would be a good way to check out if we've got fucking Charlie Hemdot.

Do you see that, Christopher?

That's your career's

fucking vanishing over the horizon, son.

I tried to end the section before the phrase Charlie Hemdot was introduced to the jeans.

It'll always

one.

It'll always be the bad PM now when we're in Corporate Charlie.

Just like, who's that guy in the Malaklamb out there?

The business went to use his funnels.

Anyway, thank you very much for enduring the first half.

We're going to be back in the second section with a special guest and a round of applause for Frankie Boyle's this weekend!

Have a nice goal!

Hey, how you doing?

Prudu Sandy here.

Thank you for listening to another episode of Here Comes the Guillotine with Frankie Boyle, Susie McCabe, and Christopher MacArthur Boyd.

Susie and Christopher are playing Edinburgh Fringe this summer, so if you want to head along, head to their socials for more information.

You can get all the episodes of Here Comes the Guillotine on Global Player right now.

Search for Global Player on your app store or go to globalplayer.com.

This is a Global Player Original Podcast.