#384: The Return (really!) of Kid Friendly

1h 4m

Just in time for the holidays, we bring you an episode for the whole family!

Starring:

Adal Rifai

John Patrick Coan

Erin Keif

Editing by: 

Casey Toney

Theme by: 

Arne Parrott

Logo by: 

Emily Kardamis & Emmaline Morris

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JPC's Guided Meditations Volume 1, available now at our Patreon digital store!

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Press play and read along

Runtime: 1h 4m

Transcript

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Speaker 1 Hello, everybody, and welcome to our third ever kid-friendly episode. It's the day before Thanksgiving.
People are in their cars, planes, trains, and automobiles with their children.

Speaker 2 Or baby goats.

Speaker 1 Or baby goats. This episode is primarily for baby goats.

Speaker 1 And we're going to give you an actual kid-friendly episode. How's everyone feeling about that?

Speaker 2 Feeling

Speaker 2 nervous, I guess. Mostly.
Most of my stuff this episode is going to be, because again, I read the email.

Speaker 2 Most of my stuff this episode is going to be geared towards the baby goats kind of portion of our listener base.

Speaker 2 But it's not just that, because that's not enough for a full episode. So I'm also going to take the other version of baby goats.
So like young LeBrons, you know, a young Michael Jordan,

Speaker 2 Pete Samfras.

Speaker 1 But at that point, I feel like we're getting far afield from the word kid.

Speaker 2 Roger Federer.

Speaker 1 Because like a baby goat is called a kid, but then when you start thinking about other goats, then we're not even talking about kids anymore.

Speaker 2 What about a show and it's called Goat Babies? And it's all just, it's like, it's, again, it's baby LeBron, it's baby Roger Federer. who are some other goats and it's all of them as homicide

Speaker 2 they're in and they're interacting you know and they're you know it's like and what if

Speaker 1 yeah and all the kids listening will understand that muppets babies reference something that is really uh happening in the zeitgeist you guys i'm thrilled to be back i'm thrilled to be back in this space i think we can do it uh i want to before we get started into our riddles puzzles lateral thinking problems um remind you that that I geared these riddles, puzzles, lateral thinking problems to maybe a younger audience.

Speaker 1 So if these seem easy to you two,

Speaker 1 then maybe we just take it in stride.

Speaker 2 Okay, JPC, so it seems like we're being set up for failure.

Speaker 1 And if you guys don't get it, it means you're two grown-ups, Adel. I feel like you're ahead of me in this.

Speaker 2 Yeah, where if we don't get these right, then we look like dumb-dumps.

Speaker 2 No cap, Adel, but I'm a bit sus of Aaron right now. Don't do this.

Speaker 1 And no six, seven.

Speaker 1 No, no, I know. No.

Speaker 2 No.

Speaker 1 We are not. These kids are smarter than that.
Yes, ma'am. The kids listening to the show are not doing 6'7.
They're not doing all that stuff.

Speaker 2 Yeah, that's cringe. That's actually cringe right now.

Speaker 2 Aaron, I trust that you have the Riz to carry us through this episode, even if my homie Adel be girding right now. You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 1 I actually, there was a couple of those I did not know.

Speaker 2 That's busting.

Speaker 2 Oh, no.

Speaker 2 Oh, no.

Speaker 2 Well, this is fire. I know what it sounds like.

Speaker 1 I know what this sounds like. We are not qualified to do this.
We don't know anything about kids or preteens. We don't know.
We can't connect with them, but I would disagree.

Speaker 1 And I have a way to prove it. We are going to start the show by doing stand-up sets that are geared towards children.

Speaker 2 And this, oh, God?

Speaker 1 JVC, you're burning through all the stuff you could be using in this stand-up set.

Speaker 1 Who would like to go first? Is someone feeling inspired to maybe just two minutes sort of like just two minutes? Or like a minute and a half.

Speaker 2 Hold on. I'm sorry.
The movie trailers that you made me do.

Speaker 2 Stand-up sets?

Speaker 2 You're supposed to go first, just two minutes.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry. Can we play a clip of Adel making us do two-minute-long movie trailers?

Speaker 2 Like, I actually don't think we can in a kid-friendly episode. Right.

Speaker 2 I think we can't play clips of other episodes in a kid-friendly episode.

Speaker 1 Just for 30 seconds.

Speaker 1 Who would like to go first?

Speaker 2 I'll go first. Great.

Speaker 2 And I know that

Speaker 2 this is a little dated, but I think it'll still be seasonally. I think

Speaker 2 kids will appreciate it.

Speaker 1 Welcome to the stage, JPC.

Speaker 2 Oh, hey, what's up, everybody? I'm JPC. I am a comic from Chicago.
Hey, I got a question for you guys. Does everybody miss Halloween?

Speaker 2 I mean, what's up with, why is Halloween only one day?

Speaker 2 You're telling me there's a day where we can knock on people's doors and they'll give us candy and you're only giving us one of those? Here's my pitch for Halloween. Let's call that Thursday.

Speaker 2 Let's call that Thursday. Let's make Thursdays Halloween.
And here's the thing about Halloween. Kit Kats, okay.
Reese's PCs? Fine. Who's putting mounds bars in my Halloween bag?

Speaker 2 Have you ever had a mounds bar? Uh, last time I checked, coconut was a fruit. I'm not trying to eat fruit.
I'm trying to eat Halloween candy.

Speaker 2 Oh, man. Oh, man.
And everybody's got that one neighbor. Y'all know who I'm talking about.
Not on the golf course.

Speaker 2 Thank you. Not on the golf course that gives the full-size candies bars.
I'm talking about that one neighbor who gives you what? Say it with me. A roll of pennies.

Speaker 2 Hey.

Speaker 1 A toothbrush.

Speaker 2 Oh, it's not improv. We're not asking for suggestions.
If you you knew that it was going to be a roll of pennies, I'm here a lot, so I and I do the same Halloween bit. A roll of pennies.

Speaker 2 Hey, next time you give me a roll of pennies, I'm handing it right back to you because that means you have a dollar and you could go buy a clue.

Speaker 2 I'll hand you a dollar. We really don't.

Speaker 1 Here's a tip. Our generation really doesn't handy next time.
Do hard money anymore.

Speaker 1 Pennies are sort of a thing of the past.

Speaker 2 And that's my time, and I've been JPC, and that's busting. Busting.

Speaker 2 Everyone in the crowd's flossing still. Still.

Speaker 1 There we go. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Welcome to the stage. You know them.
You love them. Adel Rafai.

Speaker 2 Adel.

Speaker 2 Hey, everybody.

Speaker 2 What is going on?

Speaker 2 With winter?

Speaker 2 Snow just falls from the sky and we pretend this is normal?

Speaker 2 I haven't left my house in a couple weeks. And,

Speaker 2 you know, I step outside and I'm like, ooh, it's kind of cold out. And I'm wearing sweatpants and the wind is like your house.
Huh? Why haven't you left your house? This is an improv.

Speaker 2 We don't need suggestions. Okay.

Speaker 2 I just haven't felt because I haven't felt like leaving the house, I guess. Or I was about to crash out.

Speaker 2 I guess when you get older, home is like, I guess the best part of vacations as you get older is coming home um versus the vacation itself and we'll all and raise your hand if you're older facts see a lot of confused faces i guess

Speaker 2 i guess i should say like an age range but um

Speaker 2 who here has uh

Speaker 2 an interest

Speaker 2 oh you sir what's your interest

Speaker 2 uh gucci gucci

Speaker 1 i like minecraft Minecraft.

Speaker 2 Okay. So what if Gucci and Minecraft teamed up? I think it would go a little something.

Speaker 2 I'm getting the light. I'm getting the light.
Thank you all.

Speaker 2 It's a green light. I think they're telling you to keep it.
Green means go, boy. Oh, what is this? The Great Gatsby?

Speaker 2 Anybody here read The Great Gatsby?

Speaker 2 It kind of ends with a green light in the distance. I like microtransactions.

Speaker 1 Spoiler alert.

Speaker 2 Okay, getting a lot of participation from the crowd. All right.

Speaker 2 Hey.

Speaker 2 Hey, great job.

Speaker 2 Coming up next to the stage, you know her, you love her. To know her is to love her.
Eric Cave.

Speaker 2 Hi, everybody.

Speaker 1 I know a couple months ago, we all went back to school. I thought going to school, the central part of it, would be, I don't know, learning or making friends.

Speaker 1 Little did I know, the only thing that it's about is keeping track of my water bottle. Why have water bottles become the most important thing about school? Where is your water bottle?

Speaker 1 Have you left it on the bus?

Speaker 2 Have you left it on the bottom? She's holding a pretend microphone in front of her real microphone. Leave me alone.

Speaker 1 It's helping.

Speaker 2 No one else did this for the stand-up setup. She's holding a fake microphone.
It's actually stopping her from speaking directly into the microphone.

Speaker 1 Let me do my work. My mom's bought me like 15 water bottles.
That's the only thing we spend money on. I got one on my desk.
It's filled with mold. I got one in my locker.
It's disgusting.

Speaker 1 I keep switching up water bottles with my friend. No one can keep track of my water bottle.

Speaker 1 My teacher went to school, spent $150,000 to get a master's degree in education, and her whole day is keeping track of my water bottle. Can you believe it?

Speaker 1 The whole crowd is like cheering and so excited because it's so relatable. Wait, we can say that?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Anyway, Casey, insert this line.

Speaker 2 The whole crowd's going nuts.

Speaker 1 Tip your waiter in water bottles. That's our currency now, I guess.
I love y'all.

Speaker 2 Have a great day.

Speaker 2 People throwing water bottles on stage.

Speaker 2 Yeet, eating water bottles up at you.

Speaker 1 I was the closer, and I feel like I felt like I had closer energy, right?

Speaker 2 You were the only one, Erin, who I think prepared ahead of time, though.

Speaker 1 I didn't prepare ahead of time.

Speaker 2 Okay, yeah, right. Sure.
Yeah. And every time I do improv, it's all off the dome.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it should be.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 1 I do know that because I have a sister who's a teacher, and

Speaker 1 I feel like water bottles are a a big source of.

Speaker 2 Oh, so she did prepare.

Speaker 1 Well, no, I just listened to my sister when she talked. I could have picked anything that she talks about.

Speaker 2 Listening is preparing. Listening is preparing.
And my brother talks all the time. And if you think I'm going to listen to a word of it, you're dead wrong.

Speaker 2 And kids listening, you know what I'm talking about. Listening to your siblings.

Speaker 2 Listening to your parents, really important.

Speaker 2 Very important. Do not mess around.

Speaker 2 When your parents tell you something, it's because it's important. Also, your teachers and your doctors.
If there's any

Speaker 2 adult in an outfit, listen to them.

Speaker 1 Or don't.

Speaker 1 We don't care. We're not your parents.
We're not your doctors.

Speaker 1 We're not your substitute teachers. We're not yours.

Speaker 2 The paradox of an adult telling you something. Maybe it's wrong.
And just go ahead and consider that.

Speaker 2 And parents, if you're listening, I'm sorry I introduced the concept that adults can maybe be wrong, but guess what? They can.

Speaker 2 And I'm not, and I'm not backing off of it. I'm doubling down on it.

Speaker 1 I want every grown-up to turn to your kid right now.

Speaker 2 unless you're driving no i don't care turn do a full 180 around and i want you to say i'm sorry i'm wrong most of the time turn to your kid and say that right now i'll wait you can say when i told you that the car doesn't actually start until the seat belts are clicked in that was a lie no it is important that you wear your seatbelt but cars don't work like that and you're gonna need to know that in your adult life some parent just turned off this episode so quickly

Speaker 1 All right, let's get into some riddles.

Speaker 2 Yes, absolutely.

Speaker 1 I speak every language, but never learned one. I answer questions, yet I never think.
What am I?

Speaker 2 I speak every language, but never learned one. And I answer questions, but seldom think.

Speaker 1 But I never think.

Speaker 1 That second half I feel like is not as helpful. But I think the riddle could just be, I speak every language, but never learned one.

Speaker 2 Huh.

Speaker 2 Is Is this like

Speaker 2 I want to say, is this like Google Translate or something like that?

Speaker 1 No, but I

Speaker 1 like how your brain is working.

Speaker 2 First time she's ever told me that, and it's on the kid for me, so no one's going to listen to. Is this like the sun or something?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 2 Both spellings, Aaron?

Speaker 2 No.

Speaker 2 Okay. I speak every language, but I've never learned one.

Speaker 1 And it doesn't answer questions. It sort of, mmm, like.
Oh, is this a polka responds.

Speaker 1 No, but I would say that this is one of the most common riddle answers ever.

Speaker 2 Oh, yakback.

Speaker 1 No, not the wind, not yakback.

Speaker 2 A shadow,

Speaker 2 an egg.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, eggs speak every language.

Speaker 1 Something auditory. It's something that is a sound.

Speaker 2 Door. Breakfast is the universal language.

Speaker 1 I speak every language, but never learned one.

Speaker 2 A bird

Speaker 2 screech. Genius.
Or savant?

Speaker 1 No. I think I'm going to to tell you the answer.
It is an echo

Speaker 1 because people can.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I know. It's classic riddle.
I'd like to see a scene.

Speaker 2 Classic riddle.

Speaker 1 Adult, you are a guy who is in a cave and

Speaker 1 you're trying to hear the echo of your voice. And GPC, this is your first day on the job as an echo, and you're really nervous and you're not doing a very good job.

Speaker 2 Oh,

Speaker 2 Trog.

Speaker 2 Trog live in cave. Trog notice weird weird sound coming from entrance of cave when Trog screams, so Trog gonna test something out.

Speaker 2 Hello.

Speaker 2 Oh, I can't do that. I can't do the accent.
Oh, there's one there?

Speaker 2 Whoa.

Speaker 2 That was weird.

Speaker 2 No, Echo stoked twice. Are you making fun of Trog?

Speaker 2 God, now I have to. Trick Trog.

Speaker 2 Ugh, Ug, Ug.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Hello, I'm Trog the caveman, the inventor of fire.

Speaker 2 Oh, I can't remember that.

Speaker 2 Hello, I'm...

Speaker 2 I'm dumb dumb.

Speaker 2 Hey, come on, man.

Speaker 2 I'm a doctor. Hey, can I be honest with you? Sorry.
Can I be honest with you?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 I'm the spirit of this cave. Oh, it's my first day.
I was the spirit of a stali mite yesterday. but I kind of got a promotion.
Jerry got shuffled into HR, and so now I'm in his spot, but I'm Jerry.

Speaker 2 Dumb name. Okay.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. That's not, nod, nod.
Very nice, nice, nice. Jerry, you're in HR now.
You're not an echo anymore. Ugh, why?

Speaker 2 Anyway, it's my first day. I'm not great with voices.
Is there any way that you could, like,

Speaker 2 be more like,

Speaker 2 I don't know, like

Speaker 2 mid-Atlantic mid-Atlantic with your accent. It would really help me so I don't have to do like caveman votes.
Oh, sure, yeah. Sure, yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 2 Wish I hadn't committed to this, um, but yeah, let me see. Yeah, it's just like if like enunciating or anything like that, that would just like help me so much because it's my first days in Echo.

Speaker 2 Yeah, for sure. I love it.

Speaker 2 Well, listen here, Stephanie. I told you to stay put and you didn't stay put.
And what happened? We got in trouble, didn't we?

Speaker 2 Oh, I can't do that. Oh, I'm not.
Hey, that's what happened.

Speaker 1 I told you to stay put, but you didn't. You didn't get a job.

Speaker 2 Oh, didn't we? Oh, no. Oh, someone did it.
I have an HR complaint. Is anyone helping me?

Speaker 1 Uh, I'll take that complaint.

Speaker 2 Well, I thought you were just echoing.

Speaker 2 I was.

Speaker 2 You can do both?

Speaker 1 I don't know. If you've failed to do your job, then I can do your job.

Speaker 2 I guess I'm out of a job. Uh-oh.

Speaker 2 You could do both jobs. Oh, no, I never considered it.
God, working HR in a cave has to be the cushiest job. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because nothing really happens. It's a cave.

Speaker 2 It's a cave.

Speaker 1 You know those like cave explorer videos? That seems like my worst nightmare.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's so claustrophobic.

Speaker 2 And this is the point of the kid-friendly episode where we talk about our worst nightmare.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 All right. Anyways.
Clowns in a cave.

Speaker 1 I travel straight while standing still. The longer I go, the shorter I get.
What am I?

Speaker 2 Candle. The longer.

Speaker 2 Pencil.

Speaker 1 A candle. But a pencil works too.

Speaker 2 I wrote that down.

Speaker 1 But pencils don't really stand still when they get shorter.

Speaker 2 Huh.

Speaker 1 They're kind of on the move. I'd like to see a scene, I guess.

Speaker 1 JPC, your pencil. I don't your candle.
Go.

Speaker 2 Sorry, I'm just sort of burning the midnight oil here. You're up late?

Speaker 2 Yeah, busy day. A lot of

Speaker 2 ideas being nice. Go.
Oh, that's great.

Speaker 2 Not for me. Oh.
Yeah, I don't, I don't, yeah, I don't really have ideas, but I help. Do you never work in like, you know, one word for you, one word for me? Like, you never.
Some of my stuff? Yeah.

Speaker 2 No, yeah, I try. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Like

Speaker 2 the, you know, the guy, the guy who's always around here, he had an idea for, like, a new light bulb that had, like, a filament that would, like, kind of, like, last forever.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I know. It's like a really cool idea.

Speaker 2 Kind of put me out of my my job, but

Speaker 2 yeah, I know, right? And so he was like writing it down, and I was like, I was like, what if also I changed color?

Speaker 2 And I was kind of doing it in the middle of his formulas, because I think there's some metallurgy involved in making the new type of whatever that is the filament or whatever.

Speaker 2 But I was like, what about green? Like, green would be cool to see. Like, you can't do green.

Speaker 2 Let me try. Okay.

Speaker 2 Is it doing? Is it going? No, just a lot of wax. Just you're making a ton of wax.

Speaker 2 Actually, maybe too much wax. You're losing a lot of wax.
Maybe stop. Maybe stop.
Maybe I'll take a break. I feel dizzy.

Speaker 2 I feel so dizzy. Yeah, for sure.
Oh.

Speaker 2 I am getting short. I have burned through.
Oh boy. I'm burning at both ends now.
Uh-oh. Uh-oh.
All right. Yeah, I've never seen that happen.

Speaker 2 Tell my wife I love her, but.

Speaker 2 Ugh.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 Knock, knock, knock. Knocking on the pantry door, obviously.
Hello? Uh, what time is it?

Speaker 2 I don't know. I have no concept of time.
Um, this is Jerry.

Speaker 2 Well, it's Jerry. Jerry the pencil.

Speaker 2 Um, I'm sorry to wake you, but uh...

Speaker 1 Ah, gosh.

Speaker 2 I'm sorry. Are you...
Do you have company?

Speaker 1 Uh, yeah, I'm kind of hosting a party with the other birthday candles. Um, it's one of our birthdays, ironically, if you can believe it.

Speaker 2 That is is serendipitous. How fortuitous.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And so we light our own heads, and then the person whose birthday it is blows out us.

Speaker 2 Oh, good. It's really fun.
Blowing. Yeah, blowing out.

Speaker 1 I don't know why I was yawning when I answered the door.

Speaker 2 Is it a boring party?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's really boring this time.

Speaker 2 Your husband, Dave.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, my husband's working the night shift tonight.

Speaker 2 He was actually working too hard on that.

Speaker 1 He was best at ambiance.

Speaker 1 He's the best. No one's better at ambiance than my husband, Dave.

Speaker 2 Dave has.

Speaker 2 You know how sometimes a candle just becomes a pile of wax? I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 I'm being so rude. Do you want to come in for a piece of cake?

Speaker 2 I would love. Oof, do you have anything stronger than cake?

Speaker 1 Like pie? Like, I got a pie.

Speaker 2 Yeah, that would be perfect. See?

Speaker 1 Do you have anything stronger than a cake? A pie. I would say cake is stronger than pie.

Speaker 2 I'd say pie is stronger.

Speaker 2 It's denser.

Speaker 1 Oh, I just mean like... Flavor-wise? Flavor-wise.

Speaker 2 I'd still go with pie. Oh, okay.

Speaker 2 If I have to be the tiebreaker, and even though I introduced it, I do think that cake is stronger than pie. Really? I would say sweet-wise, cake is stronger.

Speaker 2 It's a strong, it's a cloying taste, but I feel like pie is way more potent of an actual flavor. I think amount-wise, as well, cake is going to get taller.
And I just feel like there's like a way that

Speaker 2 you got like a five-layer cake, and I'm like, that's stronger. That's going to be stronger than pie.

Speaker 1 A moot point for the kid-friendly episode, because are kids eating pie ever

Speaker 2 i don't think i've ever seen a kid eat a piece of pie oh okay aaron i guess i'd like to introduce you to my friend little jack horner who might have something to say about that who sat in the corner eating his curds and way that's someone else who put their thumb in a pie baby we tell you mother we put our thumb in the pie

Speaker 2 who put their thumb in the pie is that not little jack horner yeah he put a his thumb in the pie but curds and way is little miss muffett

Speaker 2 king who cut open a pie and a bunch of birds flew out remember Remember that king? Yeah, yeah. Remember, he cut open the pie and a bunch of birds flew out?

Speaker 2 That feels like a magician. You thinking of David Coppie Field.

Speaker 1 Pie and birds flew out.

Speaker 2 You're thinking of David Copper

Speaker 2 Pur Pie Field.

Speaker 1 Sing a song of sixpence.

Speaker 1 Sing a song of sixpence.

Speaker 2 A pocket full of rye.

Speaker 1 Four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie. When the pie was opened, the birds began to sing.
Wasn't that a dainty dish to set before the king?

Speaker 1 The king was in his counting house, counting out his money. The queen was in the parlor, eating bread and honey.

Speaker 1 The maid was in the garden, hanging out the clothes, when down came a blackbird and pecked off her nose.

Speaker 2 This is scary.

Speaker 1 Never mind.

Speaker 2 That was what plastic surgery was before we had plastic surgery. It was just blackbirds.

Speaker 2 So we're going to send the bird.

Speaker 1 It'll be like four days of recovery.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 1 I can cross a river without getting wet and climb a wall without touching it. What am I?

Speaker 2 Fish. Wind.
Big old fish. Big old wind fish.
Fish on a bike. Wind fishing.
Fish on a bike.

Speaker 2 I can cross a river without getting

Speaker 2 climb a wall without touching it. Wall boat.

Speaker 1 No, but a boat gets wet when it's in the water, right? Anti-gravity boat.

Speaker 2 No. Is it a frog on a lily pad?

Speaker 2 Surfing?

Speaker 2 Can you imagine? Oh, I mean. Can you imagine from even a Disney?

Speaker 1 I don't know, maybe.

Speaker 2 So, what crosses a river without getting wet? Is this like a person in a boat?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 2 Okay. Disney's surf frog.

Speaker 2 Starring Will Arnett. Frog.

Speaker 1 I don't want to keep being in this little bog anymore. I want to go to the ocean and win competitions.

Speaker 2 This is Will Arnett and Mini Driver as Lily Pad.

Speaker 2 You,

Speaker 1 I'll never go to Siff of the Ocean.

Speaker 2 Finally, she's letting her true accent soar. It's what we've always wanted for Mini Driver.

Speaker 1 Someone kids know all about.

Speaker 2 It's not a frog and a lily pad. No.

Speaker 2 Yeah, let's take that again for kids. Starring Mr.
Beast.

Speaker 1 I'm here with a bunch of people who need a lot of money, and I'm going to humiliate them in front of all of the world.

Speaker 2 And introducing Zendaya's younger sister.

Speaker 2 What are we doing here?

Speaker 1 What is the answer to the riddle?

Speaker 2 Is the water frozen? Is that why it never gets wet? Is it something where the water is frozen? Is it like a hockey puck or something?

Speaker 1 No, the water is not frozen.

Speaker 2 And the hockey puck would still get wet because it's sweating because hockey is very strenuous.

Speaker 2 So strenuous. Yeah.

Speaker 2 You really bundle up for hockey. I cross a river without getting wet.
I climb a wall without touching the wall. Yep.
Is this a wave? No. No, because a wave would get wet.
A rope?

Speaker 1 Can I give you the answer?

Speaker 2 Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 1 A shadow. And I would like to see a seed.
Whoa.

Speaker 2 Huh.

Speaker 1 Adel, you are a guy and you have just crossed a river and you realize that your shadow that's still on the other side was too scared to cross. So you're trying to convince him to not be scared.

Speaker 2 All right, so

Speaker 2 crush the boat here, and we'll just go. Oh, oh, oh, what?

Speaker 2 Hey!

Speaker 2 Yooohoo!

Speaker 2 Dang it.

Speaker 2 Can you jump, jump, and I'll catch you. Can you swim?

Speaker 2 I forgot I never taught my shadow English. Um, should I teach it English now?

Speaker 2 Mother, I see you. I'm not sure.
Are you doing poetry?

Speaker 1 Sir, sir, you cannot walk around without your shadow, or I'm going to have to fine you.

Speaker 2 Yeah, no, well, it's across. It's just right over there.

Speaker 1 I'm giving out tickets for people who are disconnected from their shadow.

Speaker 1 It's called the Peter Pan Law. You get it.

Speaker 1 The city will completely go into chaos if people are disconnected from their shadow. I'm just doing my job.

Speaker 1 Okay, dogs can't be off leashes and shadows can't be disconnected.

Speaker 1 I know, I'm just saying this is, it's, there aren't, there,

Speaker 1 there should be some order to the chaos of the world, sir. Sir?

Speaker 2 Sir. How much is the ticket?

Speaker 1 $8,250.

Speaker 2 I'll just pay it. I'm rich.

Speaker 1 Come on, man.

Speaker 1 Get your shadow.

Speaker 1 You're not above the law.

Speaker 2 Come on.

Speaker 2 Okay, I do.

Speaker 2 I think I...

Speaker 1 You left your shadow over there?

Speaker 2 Look how scared he looks. It didn't fall.

Speaker 2 I didn't realize it was scared of water. It stayed.
Can I buy? Maybe I'll get a new shadow.

Speaker 2 Oh, no. My shadow's melting.

Speaker 1 Looks like he's sort of milking. He's trying to get you to feel sorry for him.

Speaker 2 Oh.

Speaker 1 You obviously have to go down to City Hall if you want to register with a new shadow.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's obvious. I've never heard of this law.

Speaker 1 It's obvious. I mean, obviously, like, you have to go down to City Hall.
It takes like two, three weeks to get paired with a new shadow.

Speaker 2 I thought you melted. I thought you melted.
I'm going to be tree shadow.

Speaker 1 The tree's shaking his head now.

Speaker 1 Can I join tree? No, no, no.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 2 You can stop an integrating shadow.

Speaker 1 All right, now, sir, you have no shadow, and that is a $10,000 fee.

Speaker 1 You got to go down to City Hall first.

Speaker 2 $10,000. I thought earlier you said $8,000.

Speaker 1 That's if you have no shadow at all. It's an additional $10,000 fee.
You got to go down. The universe has some rules, man.

Speaker 2 We can't be walking around without a shadow.

Speaker 2 Welcome to City Hall. How can I...
I'm the mayor.

Speaker 2 Front desk. A horse.
Today I'm a horse with a shadow. How can I help you today?

Speaker 2 I'm looking to

Speaker 2 get a new shadow. Lost your shadow? Shadow melted?

Speaker 2 Yeah, oddly enough disconnected from the shadow it melted.

Speaker 2 Yeah, if it's a sunny day a shadow's gonna melt pretty quick if it's not connected to your reality Yeah, join a tree shadow in order to kind of stay they do that

Speaker 2 on this lane. I guess stay young kind of forever.
Okay

Speaker 2 Do you know what kind of shadow you're in the market for? I guess like a newer one that has like GPS and knows to stay with me

Speaker 2 interesting or like lane correction so that you know if I'm walking on the sidewalk it doesn't sort of project into the you want like a 2025 shadow. Yeah, if you have one.

Speaker 2 Only thing is, all the 2025 bottles are really small right now. They'll get bigger in a, I want to say like 14 years, but

Speaker 2 for a big guy like you, that's, yeah, I mean, it's just gonna, it'll be a tiny shadow. It'll kind of be like a baby shadow.

Speaker 2 That would be fun, though. Have a baby shadow.
It would be fun, but will it be legal? No.

Speaker 2 You're gonna want to get something at least commiserate with your size. I can get you a baby elephant shadow.
Yikes. This is dirty into a bullying session.

Speaker 2 That's more like a two-year gestation period, though. What else? What else? Oh, I can get you a little tree shadow.

Speaker 2 Yeah, tree shadow. Do you have any used shadows? Is it tree shadow used? I get a used tree shadow about your size.
Let me fill out the paperwork, stamp, stamp. That'll be another $10,000.

Speaker 2 What the heck? And here's your tree shadow.

Speaker 2 It's you,

Speaker 2 it's me,

Speaker 2 it's me, it's it's your shadow. Oh, yeah, I have a tree shadow now.
Hi, hi, hi, buddy. I'm your old shadow.

Speaker 2 I was in a tree. Oh, it's oh my gosh, it's you.
You left me's pen.

Speaker 1 I'm gonna have to find you. You can't have a tree shadow if you're a man.
You're gonna freak people out.

Speaker 2 See,

Speaker 2 the man with a tree shadow. That sounds does sound like a DC superhero, tree shadow.
Tree shadow, yeah.

Speaker 2 I think it would be awesome one day to be walking around, look at my shadow, and it's a horse shadow instead of a person shadow. That would be cool.

Speaker 1 That would be terrifying.

Speaker 2 Spiraling into madness. That would be terrifying.
Yeah. I would be like, okay, I guess I'm a moon knight now.

Speaker 2 And people be like, what's moon knight's power? And I'd be like, this has to be close to it.

Speaker 1 I'm the only room you can't enter, and you can carry me everywhere. What am I?

Speaker 2 A bathroom. And you can carry a little piece of bathwater in your pocket.
So, kids, let that be a lesson to you.

Speaker 2 After your bath at night, put a little piece of that bathwater in your pocket and take it with you to school tomorrow.

Speaker 1 No, don't.

Speaker 1 JPC, are you having a hard time getting into your bathroom?

Speaker 2 I thought we weren't going to talk about stuff that we agreed not to talk about on the show.

Speaker 2 Mariah has locked me out of the bathroom because I keep trying to put bathwater in my pockets.

Speaker 1 Okay, we will cut that out unless i forget in which case i need it

Speaker 2 to keep me safe

Speaker 1 um

Speaker 1 any guesses it's the only room you can't enter

Speaker 2 mushroom yes yeah mushroom mushroom mushroom

Speaker 2 that's so good

Speaker 1 of course

Speaker 1 i go up but i never come down

Speaker 2 I go very go around. Nope, they come down.
That's their whole thing.

Speaker 2 Baby,

Speaker 2 I go up, but I never come down.

Speaker 2 Housing prices.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 2 Well, no, Aaron. That's pretty true.

Speaker 1 I mean, that's true.

Speaker 2 Up, but I never. Oh, balloon.
No.

Speaker 2 Helium. No.

Speaker 2 It just escapes the atmosphere. There's a finite amount of heat.

Speaker 1 You're saying these things that are technically true, but they're not what I'm looking for.

Speaker 2 It goes up, but never comes down. Ooh,

Speaker 2 a positive attitude.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 2 A shark being fired from a cannon?

Speaker 1 That never lands?

Speaker 2 That stays in in the sky?

Speaker 1 Is that something I should be afraid of?

Speaker 2 I think what you meant to say was a shark being fired by a cannon, as in a cannon's like, hey, this is your last day.

Speaker 2 Come on. I want your shark badge.
Your shark gun.

Speaker 1 No, please.

Speaker 2 I'm a loose cannon.

Speaker 2 I'm a loose cannon. You're a shark.

Speaker 1 Hey, my dad was a shark. My dad's dad was a shark.
I've got no bones. It's all cartilage.
Please, sir. Don't fire me.

Speaker 2 Bones, teeth on my desk. You're gone.

Speaker 2 If you're a shark, why do you have a horse shadow?

Speaker 2 Goes up and never comes down.

Speaker 2 Condensation.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 2 What goes up and never comes down? Infinite balloon.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Your age.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's not true. All right.
I'd like to see it, C. Okay, great.
Erin, it is your birthday, and you make a wish when you blow out your candles to age backwards, and your wish comes true.

Speaker 1 Before I blow out my candles, thank you so much to all my grandkids that have come to my 100th birthday party. I love all of you very, very

Speaker 1 much.

Speaker 1 I love most of you very, very, very, very, very much.

Speaker 2 So Clark, I think I'll take the dishes and then

Speaker 2 for sure. I don't have the couch.
We just kind of...

Speaker 1 What was that, Colton?

Speaker 2 Grandma, I love you so much.

Speaker 1 And I love you, Colton. How are you?

Speaker 2 Happy birthday.

Speaker 1 Happy birthday. What were you guys talking about? I was about to blow out these candles.

Speaker 2 Oh, we were talking about how we were going to clean up after the party because we don't want you to clean up because we want to do that for you.

Speaker 2 So, yeah, Colton was going to take the dishes and I was going to clean the couch.

Speaker 1 My sweet grandkids think I was born yesterday.

Speaker 2 Oh, no. I know when you were.
We think you were born 100 years ago.

Speaker 2 For real. For real, for real.

Speaker 1 Just a silly old lady. You think I can't hear like a hawk? I can hear like a hawk and I can't see like one.
My vision's very bad, but I can hear everything you say.

Speaker 1 And I know that you're divvying up all of my cool stuff. Grandma's got a bunch of cool comic books.
Grandma's got all the new video games that everybody wants. Their little grubby paws on.

Speaker 1 You're not getting anywhere near my PS5.

Speaker 2 Because watch this.

Speaker 2 Watch

Speaker 1 this.

Speaker 2 Oh,

Speaker 2 woo.

Speaker 2 You've awoken the genie of the cake.

Speaker 1 Hello, genie of the cake. You know me.
I've done this several times. Age me backwards.

Speaker 2 Oh, you're going back down again?

Speaker 1 I'm going back down again.

Speaker 2 Run it back. Oh, you've done this so many times.
You've lived like 50 lives.

Speaker 1 And I want you to use the youth from my grandkids and make them a hundred years old and see how they feel.

Speaker 2 I'm not going to do that. Come on.
I'll do the reverse one, but you're, I mean, you're really pushing it.

Speaker 1 Slips you a $100 bill.

Speaker 2 Okay, well, I'll do anything for a tip. Okay, so which one? Colton? Colton gets to be zero or what happens? Or he's 100?

Speaker 1 I want him to be 100, and I want the other one.

Speaker 2 The one I know.

Speaker 2 I'm going to have to write this down. I'm going to have to write this down.
This is too much. Okay, Colton 100.

Speaker 1 Make these boys 100 years old and I want

Speaker 1 26.

Speaker 2 Okay, well, how old are you, Colton? 26. Oh, perfect.
Okay, that's an even swap. I thought I was going to have to do some math.
I thought I was going to have to age up Colton. You're 26.

Speaker 1 Do it. I'm about to kick the bucket.
Do it.

Speaker 2 This fall, Timothy Chalamet is cake genie.

Speaker 2 See,

Speaker 2 he would be such a good cake genie.

Speaker 2 He'd basically be.

Speaker 1 So good.

Speaker 2 He's basically the new Robin Williams. Mm-hmm.
All the voices he does. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2 Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 Okay. You know what?

Speaker 1 I think we should go on a quick break. And if you don't come back from that break, it's okay.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 What a horrible thing to say.

Speaker 1 Like if you, if I'm just saying, like, if, if you're, you, you're if you're 100. Yeah, if your kid gave me

Speaker 2 going into the break and you're like, and you've lived a long life. No, you just want to be done.

Speaker 1 I just mean, like, if you're, if you listened to the show and you showed this to your kid thinking that maybe it's a way for you guys to bond and your kid, it's not for them.

Speaker 2 That's okay.

Speaker 1 They gave it till the break. That's okay.

Speaker 2 Don't talk about them like they're not in the room. I hate it when a kid like me has adults talk about me like I'm not in the room i'm just saying listen kids you keep listening it's your day

Speaker 2 pandering okay so you have to break

Speaker 2 ah nuts

Speaker 2 i missed out on getting the worm this morning

Speaker 1 wait but you're You talked all about wanting to be the early bird.

Speaker 2 I know. Well, what I say and what I do is two different things.
There's quite a discrepancy between them.

Speaker 2 You've been practicing the worm all year. You said you were going to get out of bed, flop down on the floor, and start writhing around.
I know. I love breakdancing, but I guess I didn't get it.

Speaker 2 I gotta get up more early. Oh, you know what else I need to do early? Acorns early.

Speaker 2 Ah. Oh, wait.
You mean Acorns Early, the smart debit card and money app that grows kids' money skills as they grow up? That Acorns Early?

Speaker 2 Yeah, when my kids get out of their eggs, out of the nest, I want them to be prepared and set up for success in the world.

Speaker 1 That would have changed my life because I was growing up being like, Why aren't they teaching us how to handle our finances in schools?

Speaker 1 They're kind of just throwing us to the wolves when we turn 20, and I don't know anything about money. And if I had had Acorns Early, this would have been way easier.

Speaker 2 Yeah, with Acorns Early, you start with the In-App Chores tracker and teach your kids the value of a dollar.

Speaker 2 Then you can let your kids set their own saving goals and start building healthy bunny habits early.

Speaker 2 Kids can spend what they've earned with their very own customizable debit card, giving them that extra sense of independence.

Speaker 2 Plus, with Acorns Early spending limits and real-time spend notifications, parents always stay in control. What do squirrels do with Acorns? Are those like their pillows? Is that their money?

Speaker 1 These are really good questions.

Speaker 2 They treat them like pillows.

Speaker 1 If your kid, I don't know, is starting a winter lemonade stand and you need to help them stretch that dollar, really start their business, Acorns Early might be the answer.

Speaker 2 When my kids are old enough, because they're not quite old enough yet, I'm definitely going to be using Acorns Early to help teach teach them financial literacy.

Speaker 2 I've played around with this tool, it's really awesome, and it teaches a lot of great lessons for younger children to start with good money habits early on.

Speaker 1 Ready to teach your kids the smart way to earn, save, and spend? Get your first month on us when you head to acornsearly.com/slash hey riddle or download the Acorns Early app.

Speaker 1 That's one month free when you sign up at acornsearly.com/slash Hey Riddle. R-I-D-D-L-E.

Speaker 2 Let's all say what kind of bird we are on three.

Speaker 2 One, two, three.

Speaker 2 Approach acorns are their religion

Speaker 2 for squirrels. Oh, Acorns Early is issued by Community Federal Savings Bank, member of FDIC.
Pursuant to licensed by MasterCard International. Free file for new subscribers only.

Speaker 2 Subscription fee starting from $5 per month, unless canceled. Terms apply at acorns.com slash early terms.
Aaron, JPC, whoa, what are you doing? I feel like I just saw you at home.

Speaker 2 Were you in my home?

Speaker 2 Were you thinking you saw a photo of us in your aura frames?

Speaker 1 I mean, we wear these clothes every day, like cartoons, so probably seems seems really yeah we're cartoons do this too

Speaker 2 they simply must i mean that's how high the quality is on my aura frame that i thought you were actually i've been talking to you guys for days awhile oh yeah you've just been talking to pictures of us but aura frames fit so seamlessly into your home that you probably thought that we were right there along with you That must be it.

Speaker 2 And I don't know if you know this, but Aura Frames has unlimited free photos and videos. You can just download the Aura app and connect to Wi-Fi.

Speaker 2 One of my favorite features is also that you can add photos to other people's frames if you've gifted it to them and they've given you access, which I think is just delightful.

Speaker 1 And you can do little reactions on your Aura Frames being like, congratulations.

Speaker 1 That's a funny photo.

Speaker 2 Plus, Aura Frames, if you buy one, the gift box is included, which is a big plus for me who hates wrapping things. Every frame comes packaged in a premium gift box with no price tag.

Speaker 2 You can't wrap togetherness, but you can frame it. But I will warn you, they don't tell you this.
Aura Frames does not tell you this.

Speaker 2 But do not buy Aura Frames unless you want to be the number one grandson.

Speaker 2 I'm telling you,

Speaker 2 you're going to be the number one grandson. And it's going to be really hard if your grandparents have other grandsons because they're not going to feel like they did their job.

Speaker 2 And I will say I've given Aura Frames as gifts to several family members and it has gone over so well. Everyone I've given it to has been over the moon.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And do you really want to make your loved ones happy?

Speaker 2 What am I saying? For a limited time, visit auraframes.com and get $45 off Aura's best-selling carver matte frames, named number one by Wirecutter by using promo code RIDDLE at checkout.

Speaker 2 That's auraframes.com, promo code RIDDL. This exclusive Black Friday Cyber Monday deal is their best of the year, so order now before it ends.

Speaker 2 Support the show by mentioning us at checkout terms and conditions apply. Aaron, I just added a photo to your aura frame.
It's sort of a belt buckle. I think it's Ryan Renon.

Speaker 1 Oh, I fell for it again.

Speaker 2 How did I fall for it again? Happy Christmas to us all.

Speaker 2 This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.

Speaker 1 Oof, guys, I am, I'll be honest with you, having a rough time with it getting dark at like 3 p.m. now.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, it does feel weird.

Speaker 1 It is short days.

Speaker 2 You know, I heard that the reason why the days are actually getting shorter is because we've been bad and we're being punished.

Speaker 1 I would say maybe read a book or, you know what? Just remind yourself that you're not alone in this. You can talk to someone if you are having a hard time with the seasonal depression.

Speaker 1 I talk to my BetterHelp therapist.

Speaker 2 Oh, Aaron, BetterHelp, a beautiful gift to everyone. BetterHelp therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the U.S.

Speaker 2 And BetterHelp does the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goals. They help match you with a therapist that best suits your needs.

Speaker 2 Yeah, and with over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is one of the world's largest online therapy platforms, having served over 5 million people globally.

Speaker 2 And it works with an average rating of 4.9 out of 5 for a live session based on over 1.7 million client reviews. You know what, Erin? You're right.
I am going to talk to a book.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and you don't even have to get into a car to talk to your BetterHelp therapist. You can just message them anytime while you're actually going through it.
This month, don't wait to reach out.

Speaker 1 Whether you're checking in on a friend or reaching out to a therapist yourself, BetterHelp makes it easier to take the first step.

Speaker 1 Our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com/slash riddle. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash riddle.
R-I-D-D-L-E.

Speaker 2 Aaron, you were right. I talked to a book and it made me feel better.
Although Huck Finn uses some language that I don't think is really slowly fade, Casey, maybe fade, fade, fade.

Speaker 2 It's funny, I'm always thinking about it this time of year, but I'm not as young as I once was.

Speaker 2 But I care a lot about maintaining my physical and mental wellness, which means cornbread hemps, CBD gummies are a huge piece of my wellness plan.

Speaker 2 It's so funny, I have no idea why it gets to be this time of year. And I'm thinking about how I'm not as young as I once was.
Oh, same girl saying, but also, JPC, your birthday's in December.

Speaker 2 Okay, that makes sense. Well, JPC,

Speaker 2 someone left something under the tree

Speaker 2 called Cornbread Hemp CBD Gummies. Have you heard of these? You've seen these? Uh-huh, yes, I have.
They're made to help you feel better, whether it's stress, discomfort,

Speaker 2 the encroaching clock of aging, or relaxation, relaxation. I use cornbread, hemp, CBD, and GPC.
Let me just say, toss one in my mouth, I chew it, I swallow it, and suddenly

Speaker 2 I'm at peace. And I'm old as hell.

Speaker 1 All products are third-party lab tested in USDA organic to ensure safety and purity. So you can relax, relax.

Speaker 2 Okay, you guys might be onto something with this cornbread hemp CBD. Gummy.
John Travolta?

Speaker 1 John Travolta.

Speaker 2 CBD?

Speaker 2 That's awesome. And right now, hey, Riddle Riddle listeners can save 30% on their first order.
Just head to cornbreadhemp.com slash riddle and use code riddle at checkout.

Speaker 2 That's cornbreadhemp.com slash riddle and use code riddle. Ah, age is nothing but a number.
A number of years I've been on earth. Years are also nothing but physical manifestations of time passing.

Speaker 2 Hmm.

Speaker 2 I feel okay. I feel okay.

Speaker 1 Okay, GPC, open it. Open it.

Speaker 1 Just as a heads up, it is a gift for me that I just want you to open for me.

Speaker 2 And it's in this lion's mouth?

Speaker 1 Yes, and

Speaker 2 battle, huh? Pretty good.

Speaker 2 Opening the jaws of the lion.

Speaker 1 My sweater. It's my new Quince sweater.

Speaker 2 It's covered in lion.

Speaker 2 Inside.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but it's $50 and it's cashmere.

Speaker 2 Oh, well, you actually got a pretty good price on the sweater.

Speaker 1 I know. I love Quince.
I recently got some curtains and a rug from there. And I point to two other animals that have eaten my curtain and rugs that you need to fight to get them back for me.

Speaker 1 I love Quince.

Speaker 2 Oh, and I love Quince as well because they partner directly with ethical factories and top artisans. They cut out the middleman to deliver premium quality at half the cost of other high-end brands.

Speaker 2 So you can give luxury quality pieces without the luxury price tag. Is the lion something I can find on Quince? Because this is a very good lion.
I mean, like, I've had way worse quality lions.

Speaker 1 Maybe soon. Maybe soon.

Speaker 2 No animals were harmed at Quince.

Speaker 1 I love their holiday stuff, but I really love their home stuff. Incredible sheets, linens,

Speaker 1 like the most incredible basics for a price that's not spooky at all. Give and get timeless holiday staples that last this season with Quince.

Speaker 1 Go to quince.com slash Riddle for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.
Oh, congratulations, Canada. That's quince.com/slash riddle.

Speaker 1 Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash Riddle. Free shipping and 365-day returns.
Quince.com/slash Riddle. R-I-D-D-L-E.

Speaker 2 Now I will tame this lion. Oh, oh, he's got my leg.

Speaker 2 At least my cashmere jacket looks nice from Quince.

Speaker 1 Give us a spin.

Speaker 2 Ooh, can you get that leg on Quince?

Speaker 1 And JBZ, hit us with that classic song you sing to get us back from break. We do it every episode.

Speaker 2 It's the only

Speaker 2 day that you can't take the bathwater out of the tub. Just kidding.
Run into the tub and get the bathwater even if your dad's trying to take a quiet bath.

Speaker 1 Hey, I'm trying to take a quiet bath.

Speaker 2 I I had a hard day at work. Go into the recycling, grab the can from beans from dinner, then run into the bathroom and scoop the bathwater in the bean can.

Speaker 2 Bathwater in a bean can. Bath bean can.

Speaker 2 Bean can. That may cause some psychosporiasis.
Bath water. We can maybe

Speaker 2 get a psychosoca.

Speaker 2 Bathwater being here. Maybe that's bad.

Speaker 1 All right, I want to do some listener-submitted kid riddles.

Speaker 1 Thank you to everyone who submitted one. This is from Jane.
Jane says, This is from my three-year-old Leo. Oh my gosh, so it's actually from Leo.

Speaker 2 Whoa.

Speaker 1 What's the bare minimum?

Speaker 1 Hmm.

Speaker 2 Is this like a hibernation joke?

Speaker 2 That's a really good guess.

Speaker 2 What's the bare minimum? Uh-huh. You're close.
Kodiak. Is the answer Kodiak?

Speaker 1 Like, what's the bare minimum?

Speaker 2 The bare minimum. Oh, great, Eric.
Thank you. Is

Speaker 2 honey?

Speaker 2 The bare minimum. You're overthinking it.
Is it barely anything? Nope. You're overthinking it.

Speaker 2 It's the bare minimum.

Speaker 2 One?

Speaker 1 Yes, one bear.

Speaker 2 You love it. All right.
All right, Leo. That has.
Leo, you got us. Let's see.
What does that have? Leo, that has

Speaker 2 salty. No, that's nothing.

Speaker 1 This just in local three-year-old gets podcast hosts good with bare minimum riddle.

Speaker 1 We're going to go to Adel on the scene. Adel, what's going on out there?

Speaker 2 Well, thanks, Aaron. We are here with JPC, who was absolutely stumped by Leo's riddle.
JPC, thoughts on not getting it correct? Okay, Boomer, I got to say Leo's Riddle 8.

Speaker 2 Back to you, Aaron.

Speaker 1 Thanks, Adel. Back to you, JPC.

Speaker 2 Why? My part's done.

Speaker 2 I don't work for the network. I was a person being interviewed.
We have to go until break.

Speaker 2 Say something, JP Shirt. I don't work for the network.

Speaker 2 I was being interviewed. Thanks.

Speaker 1 Let's go back to Adel with sports. Addle?

Speaker 2 We all won. Back to you, Leo.

Speaker 2 Leo, say something. Leo, say something.
Leo's avoidant submitted the riddle. Leo, say something.
Leo, now, speak. Now, now's your time.

Speaker 1 I feel like we're having some technical difficulties with Leo. We're going to go to JPC with the weather.
JPC?

Speaker 2 I'm actually with Leo. We're playing,

Speaker 2 it's a game that he invented. It's called Crayon Checkers.
It's on the wall, and there's no checkers. It's just crayon.
And so what we, you know what, Leo?

Speaker 2 I think you just draw another on the wall with crayon. Oh, your mom's going to be mad at me because I'm watching you.
And I did big air quotes there.

Speaker 2 You know what? It's fine. I don't know the rules.
In your house, maybe you could do crayon on the wall.

Speaker 1 That's all we have for news at 6.30. We'll see you in a couple minutes for news at 7.

Speaker 2 I'm getting a FaceTime. I'm just going to go ahead and ignore.

Speaker 2 Thank God for ignore.

Speaker 1 That's from Leo's mom, though. She's checking in to make sure you guys aren't drawing on the wall.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 I'm going to do a... Yeah, I should get it.
I should answer it.

Speaker 2 Hello,

Speaker 2 this is a Spain.

Speaker 2 This works every time.

Speaker 1 This always works. I don't know how.
If I know anything about anything, this always works. Answering a FaceTime with your real face and then saying, hello, this is a Spain.

Speaker 2 Throwing up one hand, doing a little mustache. This is a Spain.

Speaker 2 Oh, Leo is asleep in a bed. We're not playing a crown checkers on the wall.

Speaker 2 See, it's working. Oh, I'm sorry.
I think I called the wrong number.

Speaker 2 It's okay. Have a Buena Sara.

Speaker 2 Buen is not Shay.

Speaker 1 JPC, she already hung up.

Speaker 2 You can stop doing this. Here's a JPC.

Speaker 2 My name is

Speaker 2 Spanish JPC.

Speaker 1 She hung up.

Speaker 1 These are from Marcus.

Speaker 2 Okay. Are we ready? Yeah, I'm ready.

Speaker 1 Why did the cowboy get a dachshund?

Speaker 2 Why did the cowboy get a dachshund? Oh, because

Speaker 2 he wanted to get along, little doggy.

Speaker 1 Yes, I'd like to see a scene.

Speaker 2 Whoa.

Speaker 1 Addle, you are a dog cowboy, and you are rolling into town. And JPC, you are sort of a bad guy in town, and you are not happy to see that he's here.

Speaker 2 Tied up to the fence post here.

Speaker 2 Morning, partner.

Speaker 2 Morning.

Speaker 2 You wouldn't happen to be that dog cowboy that everyone's talking about. Well, they call me dog boy, sir.
How about yourself? I don't see any badge on your chest. Are you the sheriff around here?

Speaker 2 No, I don't have a badge. My name's Mayor McCat.

Speaker 2 Kitten McCat, if you must know. And this is a cat town, dog cowboy.
Meerie meow.

Speaker 1 A hair ball goes across the screen instead of a tumbled?

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 2 Huh. Sorry, I know that's disgusting, but it's in the road, so what can be done?

Speaker 2 Well, I just stopped to water my chihuahua, and I'm bringing in a pack of Labradors, taking them to Kansas City. No, I'm sorry, man.
Those guys are going everywhere.

Speaker 2 Yeah, those are some of the least-behaved dogs on the planet. They're just running all around.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I don't really, I mean, people usually use dogs to herd sheeps and cows, but since I'm wrestling dogs, you can see my problem. Oh, yes, yes.
Well, I can see many of your problems.

Speaker 2 And the first being, you stepped into the wrong town. Because while I'm a mild-mannered, unassuming, gentle little pussycat, my friends here, not so much.
And he motions, and there's four

Speaker 2 big lions.

Speaker 2 But they're all just like fast asleep, because like lions are just sleeping like 90% of the time.

Speaker 2 Guys, come on, wake up and roar or or

Speaker 1 they go to sleep even harder.

Speaker 2 Ah, man, they're just sleeping.

Speaker 2 Just sleeping. They're supposed to intimidate you, obviously.
Oh.

Speaker 2 Well, I'm just going to grab a drink and I'll be on my way.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Let me lock my chihuahua here.

Speaker 2 Just make sure.

Speaker 2 You locked your chihuahua up with a little chicken. Yes, so the chicken watches the chihuahua.
Chicken? Is that going to wake anybody up? Chicken?

Speaker 2 Chicken and water?

Speaker 1 They're entering REM sleep. They're in a deep, deep sleep.

Speaker 2 They're really out. They are really out there.
Meow, meow, meow. Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow.

Speaker 2 There's no bartender, so I guess I'll serve you. What'll it be?

Speaker 2 Do you have any bath water? We've just got milk in a very shallow dish. Ooh, that is a cat-town drink for sure.
And honestly, we're not supposed to drink it. It's like from a cartoon or something.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, it's like sick. It's like carrots and rabbits, where it's like, rabbits don't really eat carrots.
That was

Speaker 2 because Bugs Bunny was mimicking Clark Gable, we all assumed.

Speaker 2 From the movie, I think it happened one night.

Speaker 2 Remember, this is a kid-friendly episode, so we don't ready to spend a lot of time talking about Clark Gables.

Speaker 2 It's not Bugs Buddy, it's skibbity, Michelangelo, Ninja Turtles,

Speaker 2 mimicking Logan Paul. We got it, we got it, and we got there.
Anyway, have a good day.

Speaker 1 I almost suggested we would go on break, but that's not quite right, is it?

Speaker 1 Okay, this is another riddle from Marcus.

Speaker 2 Is Marcus an adult or a kid?

Speaker 1 I assume Marcus is an adult because he has an email. But what age do you get an email?

Speaker 2 Don't know.

Speaker 2 Do kids get emails anymore?

Speaker 1 They must, right?

Speaker 1 Or maybe they're on like a like a thing with their teachers, like a portal.

Speaker 1 I don't know what's going on. Portal? No, you know what?

Speaker 2 Well, Aaron, I want to see a scene. You're going to be a teacher, and we're going to be at your class, and you're going to be introducing us to this portal that you've opened up.

Speaker 2 And you're talking about it like it's a very normal thing that all kids get introduced to.

Speaker 1 Hi, everybody. Welcome back from the weekend.
You're all pretty smart, right?

Speaker 2 I don't know. You have all the grades.
You tell us.

Speaker 1 I'm looking, oh gosh, lots of mid-B,

Speaker 1 high C range. Okay, that's not great.
But you guys are like math and science STEM good. Like you kids understand math and science from an earlier age, right?

Speaker 1 Because of like we introduced that earlier now. We know to introduce them to like coding camps and stuff like that.

Speaker 1 Like you guys get how math and science works and you could probably solve like a math science emergency, huh?

Speaker 2 That was six or seven questions. Six, seven.

Speaker 1 Not right now.

Speaker 2 We're in the second grade. Right.

Speaker 1 Of course. But you guys, second graders, are smart.
They're so smart.

Speaker 2 For eight? I feel like I'm smart for eight.

Speaker 1 Children are the future, right? And if you want there to be a future here on Earth, I need everyone to learn quantum physics like right now.

Speaker 1 What was the last thing I taught you in math?

Speaker 2 That if Cindy has six apples and we take away five apples, Cindy has one apple.

Speaker 1 Oh god, this problem has no apples in it.

Speaker 2 Okay, okay.

Speaker 1 All right. Cards on the table.
Cards on the table? Okay. These are the multiplication cards.
I just am going to shut my table.

Speaker 2 Never see these. These are so advanced.
Oh, gosh.

Speaker 1 Okay. Well, I may have access to.

Speaker 2 What is four times three?

Speaker 1 You're in second grade. You should know that.

Speaker 2 Really? 12.

Speaker 1 Okay, here we go.

Speaker 2 12? How did Cinnea get 12 apples?

Speaker 1 Okay, here we go. Um, I accidentally opened a portal this weekend.
It's totally normal. It's your run-in-the-mill portal to a different dimension.
I'm letting in like

Speaker 2 the pools are full of high sea.

Speaker 1 Okay, they're gonna be in there for 10,000 years.

Speaker 2 I'm so sticky. We're swimming the high seas.
Okay.

Speaker 2 Um.

Speaker 2 sticky. I'm covered in syrup.

Speaker 1 I didn't get your parent signature for a field trip. This is not good.

Speaker 2 All right, what if we just

Speaker 2 hit it? It just turned away the woman.

Speaker 2 It just turned away the house.

Speaker 2 We flash forward a week to the parent-teacher conference.

Speaker 2 My son

Speaker 2 said he went into a portal and swam with King Salmon to

Speaker 2 a funky beat.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 your kid has just the most incredible imagination.

Speaker 2 That doesn't sound like my Jeremiah.

Speaker 1 He, well, maybe that's something you need to foster more at home because when he gets to school, he creates these cuckoo bananas, crazy stories.

Speaker 2 Doesn't sound Jeremiah just watches CSI. He doesn't enjoy fantasy.

Speaker 1 He should not be watching CSI.

Speaker 2 So. My daughter said that she met King Salmon's

Speaker 2 unruly child flounder and they made hip-hop beats together.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so it's a game of pretend that we all play. Jeremiah introduced us to this world and we all sort of play pretend and we use it to learn.

Speaker 2 Mrs. Amy.
Yep. None of us are mad.
All of us parents just want to know.

Speaker 2 When can we get to the portal?

Speaker 1 Everybody,

Speaker 1 they're all having a pool party at the portal.

Speaker 2 King Salmon's doing the dance. This realm is at war.
Go Salmon. Go Salmon.
Wait, what? What did he say? Go Salmon. Go Salmon.
King Salmon. Go Salmon.
It's all upstream from here.

Speaker 2 Okay. We have moments before the collapse.

Speaker 1 Let's see.

Speaker 2 The inequality of our society has finally come to a head.

Speaker 2 Everybody dance now.

Speaker 2 The bears are eating all our eggs.

Speaker 2 Everybody danced now.

Speaker 1 Why did the doctor remove his doorbell?

Speaker 2 Because he ran out of patience.

Speaker 1 Oh, I love that answer, though.

Speaker 2 Because the doctor, the doctor was a ringer.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 2 Because ding-dong. Why did the doctor remove his doorbell? He removed his doorbell.

Speaker 2 Oh, because it was an apple doorbell and an apple a day keeps the doctor away. and so he couldn't go to his own home because technology

Speaker 2 had locked him out. Let him cook.

Speaker 1 Not this time.

Speaker 2 Tim Cook, CEO of Apple Computer,

Speaker 2 a type of metal-meddling kids, Scooby-Doo. They go to the door, knock, knock, boo, it's a ghost.
Scooby in the armor, Shaggy with the sandwich, Scrappy-doo. There too.
A dog.

Speaker 2 A little dog. Shaggy, A man who is so tall.

Speaker 1 Not this time.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's exactly what Scooby-Too Philip would say.

Speaker 2 Not this time.

Speaker 1 Not this time, kids.

Speaker 2 Why did the doctor remove his doorbell?

Speaker 2 Is it something to do with ding-dong? Is it something to do with the ring? He had a ring in his ears. No.

Speaker 2 Funk.

Speaker 2 Why did the doctor remove his doorbell?

Speaker 1 Trying to win

Speaker 2 a he was trying to win a

Speaker 2 door prize he was trying to win a Nobel prize I know Nobel prize

Speaker 2 yes whoa you got doctors win

Speaker 2 I think Nobel is like a peace prize but maybe if you're like a scientist like a doctor who's like I don't know

Speaker 2 I don't know

Speaker 2 Aaron, you're going to the doctor just to get a checkup. JPC, you are a doctor who's obsessed with winning awards.
And

Speaker 2 you think,

Speaker 2 for some reason, you have it in your mind that today you are up for an Academy Award. So you're really trying to win one.
An Academy Award specifically. An Oscar, an Oscar.
Okay, got it.

Speaker 2 So I was just feeling like

Speaker 1 I was talking to the nurse. I was just saying, like, I think I might have strep throat.
I'm like, really closed up in my throat.

Speaker 2 You do.

Speaker 2 You do have strep throat. Oh, good.
Okay. And I don't want you to worry about a thing.
I'm I'm not too worried about it. Because there is no

Speaker 2 mountain I won't climb. No sea I won't swim.

Speaker 1 What are you looking at?

Speaker 2 No sky. I won't dive.

Speaker 2 To find the cure for your strep throat,

Speaker 2 you

Speaker 2 will

Speaker 2 be

Speaker 2 healed.

Speaker 1 Right. I feel like you just give me like a round of antibiotics and some medicine.
Actually, I'm relieved that it's strep because when it's not that, you're like, what do I do, right?

Speaker 2 Antibiotics and medicine. Do you mind if I try another one?

Speaker 1 What do you mean?

Speaker 2 Dearest. And what was your name?

Speaker 1 You're not. Have you even read my chart?

Speaker 2 I'll just do Angela. It works better for what I'm doing.

Speaker 1 It's not my name.

Speaker 2 Dearest Angela. Not my name.
I am writing you this prescription from the future, knowing that you and I, separated by such great distance, will never meet.

Speaker 2 But I want you to know you are my one true love. Okay, I I the one I have pined for all my life, right?

Speaker 1 Okay, I know uh I know what this is.

Speaker 2 Uh, how was that?

Speaker 1 Was that I'm an Oscar-winning director? You're trying to get me to hire you. Um,

Speaker 1 I'm not, I'm not gonna do that, man. I'm sick right now.
I'm just ready to go to the doctor and get some.

Speaker 2 We cut to the Academy Awards of 2026, and the nominees for best actor are

Speaker 2 Timothy Chalamay as Cake Genie.

Speaker 2 I want to say Logan Paul as surf frog.

Speaker 2 And Dr. Boldman as Doctor in Yearly Checkup.

Speaker 2 And the winner is...

Speaker 2 Oh my gosh. Dr.
Boldman for yearly checkup.

Speaker 2 Thank you so much, Shalomay. Oh, my God.
This is Dr. Boldman's first win and first nomination.
Dr. Boldman is not an actor.
I loved you, Shalom. I loved you in Cake Genie.
Logan, oh, gotcha.

Speaker 2 Right in the front. And he's down.

Speaker 2 He's down. It was a sucker punch, I know.

Speaker 2 First of all, I want to thank Eng Lee.

Speaker 2 Would Ang Lee...

Speaker 2 That wasn't Eng Lee. Eng, short for Angela.
Oh, boy. I owe.
I owe whoever directed me a big apology. I was calling you Ang Lee.
This makes sense.

Speaker 2 Because I was like, I talked to you for like 45 minutes about Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon.

Speaker 1 I bet I love that movie. We all did.

Speaker 2 Broke Back Mountain.

Speaker 2 What else? Life of Pie. Life of Pie.
Hulk.

Speaker 2 Why doesn't Englie make movies anymore? Probably because of Hulk.

Speaker 2 Oh, they're playing English's song. Okay, Englie, get up here and join.
Get up here and join. Seed.

Speaker 2 Ang is short for Angela. Angela.
Angola Lee.

Speaker 2 All right. I like when they play music at the Oscars, you know, to play people off stage.

Speaker 2 I think just once it would be so great if instead of like playing off music, they played like Stone Cold Steve Austin's music, and then he just ran out on stage on the Oscars and did his like Stone Cold Steve Austin thing,

Speaker 2 like in the middle of Jennifer Lawrence, except they get older. De Niro throws him a beer and he catches it, slams him together, and chugs it.

Speaker 2 Because it starts with glass breaking, right? Oh, yeah. Kids know this.
Kids love Stone Cold Steve Austin. I love Stone Cold Steve Austin.
They love his podcast where he talks about his cats.

Speaker 2 All right.

Speaker 1 This is from Mallory. Mallory says a lot of nice things that I will read to you later, but this is her riddle.
What is orange and sounds like a parrot?

Speaker 2 Parrot.

Speaker 2 A carrot.

Speaker 1 A carrot.

Speaker 2 Which we think rabbits eat, but they don't because.

Speaker 2 It happened one night.

Speaker 2 I think rabbits eat grass and leaves. I do want to say something.
Oh, okay. Aaron, did you have something? Oh, no, go.

Speaker 2 Aaron, you are

Speaker 2 Hugs Honey, which is sort of a Bugs Bunny for the newer generation. Great.
And you don't eat carrots. You have something else.

Speaker 2 And JPC, you are Helmer HUD, which is sort of a Elmer Fudd for the new kids.

Speaker 2 Now, where's that rascally wabbit? I'm going to find him

Speaker 2 and then

Speaker 2 give him a crypto coin.

Speaker 1 Hey, uh, what's up?

Speaker 2 Oh, hugs, honey. I wanted to give you point zero zero three Ethereum.

Speaker 1 Uh, sorry, I'm kind of in the middle of something. I'm eating a Costco hot dog.

Speaker 2 Losses for 30 seconds.

Speaker 2 Scene.

Speaker 2 Perfect. The perfect scene.

Speaker 1 Perfect. The deep sigh so many of our listeners just did was warranted.

Speaker 2 And we are sorry. A Bugs Bunny with a almost like Rachel Marks with a cigar, like a Bugs Bunny with a Costco hot dog snapping off a bite, being like...
Classic. What's up?

Speaker 1 I would also like to see a scene. Okay.

Speaker 2 Adel.

Speaker 1 You are a guy who is like showing up to a nice dinner party and you're bringing your parrot with you and you're just you're hoping that your parrot doesn't embarrass you by repeating things that you've said.

Speaker 1 Oh, come in, come in. Let me get your coat.

Speaker 2 Oh, thank you so much. Oh, careful, careful, careful.
Sorry.

Speaker 1 Oh, my gosh. You brought your bird out.

Speaker 2 Yep. That is Tabasco, my saucy little bird.
I've heard all about Tabasco.

Speaker 1 I love your posts about him online. His TikTok is so funny.

Speaker 2 He's a real, he's a real scamp. It does, I mean, it does think think that he has over 500,000 followers and I have, you know, 200, but right, but you make the money from that because

Speaker 2 you think, you think.

Speaker 1 He keeps the money.

Speaker 2 He, yes, he has his own bank account. He's learned to sort of mimic what I do and say, so he's been able to sort of...
Hey, you're here. Oh, Tabasco, come with me.
Let me show you around.

Speaker 2 Wait.

Speaker 2 See, he's sort of parroting what you said earlier.

Speaker 1 That's so weird. He sounded just like me.

Speaker 2 It was uncanny. Tabasco, I have to introduce you to Lorne Michaels.
Lorne, you'd love Tabasco. He's gonna be, he's gonna be the next big star.

Speaker 1 It's so scary. I haven't even said anything like that yet.
I was going to, but I haven't even said that yet.

Speaker 2 He thinks he's gonna be on Hassan now. I guess we could get on your plane tonight.
Uh, Tabasco, do you have to check in with anybody or wait?

Speaker 1 Tabasco, are you trying to influence what I say? Are you doing pre-parroting

Speaker 2 hey guys

Speaker 2 tabasco left with lauren i'm so i'm so sorry why is this parrot talking to me like this

Speaker 2 it's also smarter than me because i say lauren michaels and he pronounces it correctly which is lauren it's the canadian pronunciation lauren i actually don't really feel so comfortable introducing you to my famous friends anymore um

Speaker 1 I don't really. No, no, you're great.
Pre-parroting is, I think, really strange.

Speaker 1 You can repeat stuff I've said, but don't tell me what to say. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 Tabasco? Don't like tell me what to say, Tabasco. So get your coat, head out.

Speaker 2 Hey, Megan, a lot of people at the party saw you yelling at Tabasco, and they want you to leave. What?

Speaker 2 Yeah, a lot of people saw you yelling at Tabasco.

Speaker 1 Wait, no, I'm falling for that. Tabasco, I'm not going to keep following for this.

Speaker 2 Hey, Megan, it's your husband, Nick, okay?

Speaker 2 I think something's seriously wrong. Tabasco, why? You were yelling at Tabasco the bird at the party, and then everyone got uncomfortable, and a lot of people wanted you to leave.

Speaker 2 Maybe just go on a drive, you know? Maybe just like cool down a little bit.

Speaker 1 Sorry, why are you so good at doing all these voices? Tabasco, can you control your bird, please?

Speaker 2 Me? Yes. No.

Speaker 2 So, Megan, tell me, who do you think Tabasco, the bird, is to you?

Speaker 1 Everybody. Everything.

Speaker 1 Everyone? I don't know. I don't know where my loved ones started, and he stopped.

Speaker 2 Incredible impression of Sigmund Freud. Do we even have recording of his voice? Can I posit to you? You're Tabasco.
A world. Wait, Tabasco.

Speaker 2 Where there is no Tabasco, or maybe a world where you are Tabasco.

Speaker 1 Tabasco, I want to hear an impression of my friend JPC answering a FaceTime call when he's guilty of something.

Speaker 2 Well, I you think it would be therapeutic and something.

Speaker 2 Ultimately, I guess I can get out my phone and and do FaceTime. I bought Tabasco phone.
JPC, here we go.

Speaker 2 Fan.

Speaker 2 Seeing.

Speaker 1 Okie dokie.

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 would like to thank everyone for listening. I hope you have a great holiday weekend.
It's super relaxing. Is there anything you guys want to plug? Any kids' media you want to

Speaker 1 throw your endorsement behind? Anything?

Speaker 2 I have a couple things that I would love to plug. Great.

Speaker 2 This is going to be just some general things out in the wild.

Speaker 2 Kicking the back of a seat.

Speaker 2 Definitely love doing that.

Speaker 2 Hiding crayons.

Speaker 2 A lot of times crayons are going to only be useful for certain activities, but if you hide them, you can use them for whatever you want later.

Speaker 2 What else? What else? What else? Oh, putting little rocks in shoes. It's so fun to pick up little rocks and it's so fun to hide them in shoes.

Speaker 2 Because if we're, you know, if we're having secrets and we're hiding things, why not hide little rocks? You can get them later. Sneaking into the fridge.
That's fun.

Speaker 2 Maybe while someone else is like at work or taking a nap.

Speaker 1 Maybe we should do a slow fade on this. Adel, anything to plug?

Speaker 2 The fridge.

Speaker 2 I want to plug Leo for stumping us with the bare minimum, which was pretty fantastic. I also want to plug

Speaker 2 salmon's not just a king. It's a delicious food.
And I know.

Speaker 2 Listen, I didn't try sushi until I was maybe like 19 or something.

Speaker 2 Start with scallops, maybe. Start with scallops.

Speaker 2 You'll like the way you taste. You like the way it tastes.
Aaron Athens.

Speaker 2 Have it as much jelly as you want. No, that's

Speaker 2 always good.

Speaker 1 JPC.

Speaker 1 I would like to thank, if I remember their names correctly, Oliver and Liam for asking for another one of these episodes. They asked their parents to ask me at our Portland live show.

Speaker 1 And I'm glad that you did because I love doing these and we will try to do them every November.

Speaker 1 And also, we love you.

Speaker 2 Playing in the sink. Get a towel if you feel like you're doing it.

Speaker 1 We like JPC. Adel and I are not going to give up on building you a better world.
We love you.

Speaker 2 Bet on yourself. Don't necessarily grab a towel and be like you can play in the sink without playing without the towel.

Speaker 1 Don't be like him.

Speaker 2 Get the towel later if you make a mess, but play in the sink and have fun. Have fun out there.
Play in the sink. Stay off the ladders, but play in the sink.

Speaker 1 Jupiter.

Speaker 1 This has been Hey, Riddle Riddle.

Speaker 1 Created by Adel Rafi.

Speaker 1 Starring Darren Keenan

Speaker 1 and John Patrick Cohen.

Speaker 1 Casey Toby did the editing.

Speaker 1 And Arnie Parris in the music.

Speaker 1 Logo created by Emily Cardamis and Emily Neborus.

Speaker 2 Hey there, satellites and rovers. If you like that, you're going to love this week's Patreon.
We go on a mission to Mars with a Mars draft.

Speaker 2 You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com patreon.com/slash Hayward Overdale by joining the Clue Crew for $5 a month or start your seven-day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month.

Speaker 2 Plus, you get those ad-free episodes. See you there.

Speaker 1 That was a hit gum podcast.

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