FUMBLE, BUMBLE AND MANY DRINKS

Chat on the Lose is very different from every podcast out there because

it's not scripted, it's not edited, it's not planned, it's real life.

The other thing I like about it is that you ask the questions that people are secretly thinking.

Yeah, we try, so this is the situation.

We try to make it like as real as possible.

And we don't plan.

And I feel that people crave the real

Reality of life as opposed to the fakeness of social media and and things that are scripted Things that you plan ahead.

So now for example, we were gonna do this episode on Friday and it's Tuesday night and I'm here with my best friend gorgeous gorgeous gorgeous

Which makes everything even better and more real.

We had a day from hell.

Let's be honest every superwoman has a day that you're not feeling fantastic.

You go through a lot of stress, a lot of crap.

So we had one of those days.

And finally, when it was 7 a.m., I said, hey, maybe we need to go out and have a drink.

7 p.m.

I said.

Which was so crazy.

When you sent me that text, I was thinking, as soon as I'm off the phone with my mom, I'm going to call Kat and be like, hey,

let's just go somewhere and have someone wait on us.

Exactly.

Let's just fucking go for it.

Because, you know, we work really hard, really long hours and most days I end up falling asleep in bed working with my dogs and you do the same so tonight you're like okay

yeah let's go to some hours

yes let's unwind i've been having i know it's only tuesday i've been having the week from hell and some days are like that and i know a lot of people out there relate

and that's the thing i don't want to send a message that oh everything is perfect everything is amazing everything is all always roses and flowers and la la la la la no real life happens and sometimes it's shitty and sometimes it's stressful so anyways this is what brought us here to do this impromptu episode of candaloos now we've been talking about a bunch of nature issues by the way my bestie not only she's gorgeous she looks like cameron diaz slash Linda Evangelista slash all the hot blondes on the planet.

She looks like a supermobile.

She's one of the best bartenders that ever lived.

It will take me 48 minutes to make your drink.

I know.

No, it took only the best.

It didn't take you 48 minutes.

It took you four and a half minutes, but that's okay.

48 minutes and bartender minutes.

She makes the best drinks.

Usually, I'm a wine and champagne drinker,

but she likes tequila.

It's the only spirit for me.

And ever since you started making this, we'd name this drink a yellow rose because it's my favorite flower.

But it's just insanely delicious.

It's the perfect combination of tequila ice and a bunch of other

magical concoction crap that she puts on it.

I could never replicate it.

Each drink is a little bit different.

Where is yours?

I love my sippy cup at my plate.

There is another sippy.

Okay, then let's share this one.

I'm not going to drink by myself.

No, no, no, no.

Hey, I was just going to run across and get mad.

No, we have one here.

So, this is the plan.

I thought we did too, but I can't find it.

She's all CD and she only drinks if we have a sippy cup.

An adult sippy cup with a sippy.

I will drink on my Paris cup.

Yeah, because I know.

This is good.

It has a hand.

Yeah, I love it.

I bought it in Paris in a new stand.

Believe me.

Does it taste okay?

Oh, you're sharing.

It tastes cannot.

Yes, of course.

There you go.

So let's talk about a bunch of issues that have been.

I'm kind of curious about what the listeners think about this.

I know, but look, this is what I think, and I know my listeners like, and this is what gets me excited about doing this podcast.

They like that this is real life.

We just come up with this stuff and we talk like you know, two girlfriends talking.

We bring stuff up and we come up.

I really

celebrities.

We're not celebrities yet.

So, by the way, if there are any sponsors out there, get us wild.

We are cheap.

Yeah, I will totally wrap your tea and be like this diet tea made me skinny y'all

amen but the point is the past few days we have been talking about a few issues that and i do get a lot of questions about that so between us girlfriends let's just dissect it.

So many listener questions.

So many, but one of them, which is, I know a lot of you girls out there relate.

We, most of us nowadays, date through dating apps.

Even before COVID, and then COVID made dating apps even more

important

and bigger and la la la la la.

And then there is this whole new

trending thing out there, which is faking

your dating profiles to find find out if the people that you're dating are still on dating profiles hence the expression fumble that comes from bumble bumble as I'm sure all of you girls know is the dating app after Tinder you go on bumble and bumbo is all about girls make the first move but it's pretty much exactly like tinder right I was never on either one it's very like fascinating to me.

Yeah, you didn't need to, but you know how they work my friends i deactivated my facebook in college my friends you did in college after i graduated i was like i'm done with this shit you are so lucky people are so crazy they started getting crazy way back in like 10 years ago in 2012 i was like over it but then my friends thought it would be a funny prank because tinder came out the same year they created a but i i guess back in the day you had to connect your facebook to your tinder for it to be legit are you serious They created a shut off the background music.

Tinder created the no.

So my friends, my college friends created a fake Facebook profile using pictures and stuff of me and created a fake Tinder account using that fake Facebook account.

People still do that.

And okay, the thing that's the most fucked up about it is they use my EDU address, which no longer exists.

And I have contacted Facebook so many times.

My mom has contacted Facebook, being like, Hey, this is a fake account.

No one has responded.

I hear you.

And now this fake Facebook of me as a college girl, like with my tits pushed up, holding a glass of wine pops up on Facebook.

Are you serious?

I am dead serious.

People will be like, why didn't you accept my friend's request?

I'm like, because they don't have Facebook.

I don't know who you are.

Yeah.

And I'm just like, mom, this is why I can't find employment.

I'm like, don't blame me.

Blame the blame facebook blame the zombie facebook account i didn't even create okay

oh my

story though so facebook if you're listening to this a fuck you they don't take down this account like seriously listen i have so many fake accounts that that they literally steal my photos all over i don't know if facebook but all over instagram If you go if you don't like Instagram Katsamuro, there's like a gazillion accounts and they steal.

I know.

They literally get your pictures and they change the name.

And it's crazy, creepy, and they still don't verify my account because I talk about sex, but whatever.

That's a whole other subject.

They don't verify the account because you like have to do this black magic where you like create a voodoo doll and you worship Mark Zuckerberg and then they verify it and you have to go to that crazy, it's like Burning Man, but only if you're a rich old white guy that sold your soul to the.

Oh my god, I love you.

I forgot what it's called.

It's called like, shit, it's in Northern California or something.

It happens happens every year i swear to god yes no but basically you have to sell me

i know i know yeah i have not done that yet but no selling of the soul to the devil

i love you amen

so let's talk about this for a while because i know you're gonna be crazy honest about it most people nowadays that's a given we talked about it on this podcast one million times yeah we meet people on dating apps why because

of COVID, because we're busy, because we don't know where to go.

La la la la la.

Okay,

hence Bumble, which is just

one girl that got out of Tinder and started Bumble.

Congratulations, I forgot her name.

Phenomenal.

She's making millions and millions of dollars, billions of dollars.

Bumble.

And then fumble started.

If you guys never heard about it, what is fumble?

It's a fake bumble.

Meaning, you go to bumble, you meet somebody, right?

You start talking.

With a real profile.

With a real profile.

Like me, Catherine, I go on bumble, I meet someone, or you or anybody else.

You start dating a person and then you're wondering, like, are they really into me?

Are they really only dating me?

Are they dating somebody else?

Hence, people started creating fumbles.

Yeah.

It's which is a step up from creating finstas.

Well, like, I feel like, okay, here's the problem.

Guys are so horny that even if a girl's bumble profile is completely unverified and only like 20% feminist.

They believe it.

Well, like, they will swipe right because to a lot of guys, it's a numbers game, right?

A numbers game in terms of how many girls I'm gonna go out with and fuck.

A numbers game in terms of like, you know, if you go fishing or whatever, you keep throwing out the line.

No matter what, it's just like a number.

But isn't bumble supposed to be for people that actually want relationships?

I mean, I guess in theory, in theory,

remember back in the day before, um, iPhones and apps and like location-based

sexuality.

How do we use to meet people?

I don't know, girl.

But like, the websites were called like eHarmony math.

They still are there.

Yeah, I never tried to do it.

Like, shit like this

at least has the mirage of like

true love or whatever.

Yeah.

But here's the thing people forget and this is why I've always been suspect about these apps, okay?

Yeah.

Honest to God, because men are fucking predators.

It's how the human race is still around.

True.

And like people want to be like, oh, he was a nice guy.

But I'm like, men are hunters.

I agree.

And like, think about how hard it was for guys to get laid before these apps.

Like, I've honestly, I've spent a a lot of time, way too much time, analyzing this.

Men, before the internet, they had to take a shower, they had to put on a clean shirt, they had to go in public, and if they saw a girl they thought was attractive,

then they're like, I think this girl is attractive.

Then they had to grow the balls to approach this girl.

Yeah.

And this girl, after all this effort, the guy taking the shower, the guy putting on the shirt, the guy like spotting his prey and the bar crowd or wherever,

and then the guy be like, Oh, I'm gonna say this.

The girl could just be like, I have a boyfriend, I know, you know what I'm saying?

I'm like, You're taking your chances, but

okay, there are still people that do that, which is kind of cool, right?

Like, I honestly have more respect for it.

I'll be like, if this guy can't approach me in person, I don't want to, I don't know.

I completely agree with you, but the fact of the matter is, dating apps have made dating more accessible, accessible, easy.

And one time, I don't know who said that expression to me that I never forgot.

It's kind of like ordering pizza food, like yes, no, yes, no, whatever.

It made it very frugal, very easy, meaningless.

But there are some people out there that want to find

meaningful relationships.

I mean, like, the numbers tell the story.

The numbers tell the story.

There are so many successful marriages

that start from these apps.

So I'm not knocking it off.

In my mind, it's kind of finding the famous diamond in the sand.

That's the way I see it.

It's like each person, A, they have to be in the right

period of time in their life, the right life circumstance

at the same magical moment, you know, and like these apps increase the likeliness of that happening.

Because there are certain people that you're never going to meet them, basically, regardless.

Like if you're talking about location, but in our case, I don't go out every night.

I'm not gonna sit at all the bars in Beverly Hills.

It's not my style.

In most people's cases, right?

Guys, like, because I don't know if it's because of the apps or just because guys are little bitches with no game.

Like, guys, I feel like with the younger generation, like, you know, I'm not a spring chicken, but like, I could look young sometimes.

And, like, when this Gen Z

Zillineal guys talk to me, they're like, what's your handle?

And I'm like, Tito's.

You buy?

I'll be like, handle, like, what are you even saying?

When I tell them I don't have Instagram, it's like, cannot compute.

They don't even know what to say.

But that means they're not the guy for you.

A trillion times.

Yeah, no.

I mean, it's funny to me because I'm like, oh, let's go this Gen Z.

Then they're like, you're lying.

Oh, you just don't want to tell me.

You're rejecting me.

And I'm like, oh, maybe.

Well, I'm just like, no, I'm I'm not.

But it's like, even if I was, you need a better comeback than that.

Yes, a million percent.

You're like, How am I gonna trick this girl into thinking I'm cool if she doesn't have the gram and she can't see my snake light?

I know, I and

yes, a lot of people have it, a lot of people use it for work, which is my case.

I have to use it for work, but men are predators, and they will use it to get laid always, yes.

And so, obviously, I know the difference, I know the guy, and I'm

I know and I want a guy that knows the difference between the private cat and the work cat and the ones that send me messages through Instagram, whatever.

That's my work and you feel like

exactly.

But now there's the past few weeks, I know it is from talking to our girlfriends and a lot of people out there and getting messages.

Yeah, I've been getting dozens and dozens of questions about the same thing.

Have you heard about fumble?

Have you heard about fake profiles have you have you heard and I'm like okay let's explore the situation why would anybody do a fumble because a fumble means you did a bumble you are dating someone and you feel you should do a fake profile to literally find out if your date is still dating someone Jesus

exactly so in my mind this is the number one thing that's wrong with this okay if you're dating someone you should trust them first and foremost.

Like, hi, are you dating me?

Yes, I'm dating you.

Yes.

Meaning, if you still gotta go and spy on them, it's already wrong, no?

And maybe, like, if, okay, and your intuitive feeling, you know, even if you don't discover anything,

you should maybe be questioning,

but why am I doing this?

Exactly, but meaning if you are questioning it, if you don't trust the person,

then that's already a bad sign, right?

I'm a very curious cat with a C.

Yeah, but I have trained myself not to give that much of a fuck if unless, okay, I have the three F's.

Excuse my profanity, but I.

No, go for it, please.

I really, the guy can't tell me anything about anything, any opinion.

Basically nothing at all that I will listen to unless they are feeding me, financing me, and

fucking me all three no you didn't have to be all three

all three I'm like if you're just doing one or the other no dice like your opinion is not matter so like I guess like I don't I've never really met someone on these apps so it's hard to say I don't know like the

manners of it but like is it hard to meet someone that can do all three things on these but let's say okay I know that's not your case and I love how blunt you are about what you're looking for.

It's amazing, but I mean, like, I feel like most of you are no judgments.

Yeah, have they thought like this?

I

it may be.

Well, in my case, it's like I don't know if I have the same three F's as you, but in my case, I want honesty.

I want to know that if you're fucking me or feeding me, or whatever you're doing to me, or for me, or with me,

I want to know that I can trust you.

Meaning, if I have to set up a fumble to follow you that's already that to me that's everything is already wrong it should be you know what i mean exactly

so when this girl send me messages oh i am setting up a fumble because i want to know if this guy that i'm dating is still out there in my mind i'm thinking okay that's all right if you don't trust the person

Well, like, sometimes that conversation hasn't happened yet.

Like, okay, there was this one scenario.

One of my girlfriends out here in LA was telling me about it, and I'm like, oh, shit, that's fucked up.

So like, okay, this, I remember my friend telling me about this.

It was like her co-worker at like Paige Denim way back in the day, like telling her, oh, I met this really nice guy.

And like, I met, I met her coworker.

This girl was like total type of girl, naturally pretty, low maintenance, chill, funny.

The kind of girl like you could take back to your shitty hometown in the Midwest that you left for LA and like introduce your like family, and they will be like, Oh my god, this girl is so sweet, or your high school friends, and they'll be like, Yeah, she's cool.

It's like she was that kind of like girl, you know, like

quote-unquote, like girlfriend material, you know.

And so, like,

that's the kind of girl she had, like, a regular job, you know, with benefits, like a good girl, a good girl, right?

I wouldn't, and she was pretty, but I wouldn't say she was like, you know, like some of these sexy LA vampi girls, of which there are many, of course.

But, like, she was, you know, this type of like wholesome girlfriend material type of girl with a real non-hookerish job, you know, so that's the groundwork.

And so she meets this guy.

You know, they're dating and he's doing all the right shit, like going on mini golf.

Or I don't even remember if that was a specific date, but that type of date where it's like appropriate dates that you take someone you respect or whatever, and like this fool drags her ass to a wedding in like fecking West Virginia or some shit where whatever shit

hometown this this guy was from, right?

Like, they're talking for a few months.

I want to say it was like three or four, like, and this girl is like, whatever.

This girl deleted her bumble, and I don't know if she said anything, or whatever dating app it was, I don't even know.

Um, this was several years ago, so it could have been Tinder, you know, before they got like owned by Bumble or Hinge or whatever, but it could have been one of the oldest ones.

She deleted hers.

I don't recall if they had an explicit conversation, like, oh, I deleted mine, did you delete yours?

I can't even remember, but I feel like that's important because I know there's a lot of insecure guys out there who will be like, I deleted mine, did you delete yours?

So, like, these insecure gaslighters that try to be like, you know, get it unlocked and force exclusivity.

And then the girls are like, that's a whole, that's, that's the next question.

When, how long do you date someone?

But finish your story first.

So before we jump into the next question.

Here's the fact that thing, she goes to this god-awful wedding, God knows where, some shitty place, deals with like, you know, whatever.

It's just, it's not like he was taking her to Turks and Caicos, okay?

And so then my friend is telling me all this and randomly one of my friend's other girlfriends who's like the sexy kind of like model type that like lived in Manhattan Beach or something in a way different zip code area code than this other girl's Tinder and this other guy's Tinder was matched with the same dude and like had set up a date with the same dude

after like he had like taken you know her co-worker to this wedding and all of this stuff and now listen I don't know if the exclusivity are you still on apps am I still on apps conversation happened or not but I'm sorry if you are taking this girl from LA to meet your family and BFE

to go to a wedding and meet like your hometown friends.

Yeah.

And like y'all are talking for months and like you're acting all sweet and respectable and shit.

And then you're like, you know, taking out this other girl that's like an Insta model in Manhattan Beach.

Like that's sus.

I agree.

And like totally everyone found out about it.

Like there was no way this guy could have known

that his, you know, girlfriend's coworker would would have known this girl that he ended up matching with and taking out yeah so my friend had to tell

because i was like she was like what should i do and i'm like i don't know girl i like i don't know how close you are with this co-worker and she was just like she was like i feel like i have to tell her just because this you know her co-worker confided so much

and her about like the relationship and like all the different aspects of it.

Yeah, no, that's a lot.

So I'm like, this is why girls are creating fumbles and stuff.

Okay, so next question,

which you just brought up.

You're dating someone that you met on a dating app, Bumbo, any dating app.

How long until this conversation is appropriate?

Like, okay, I'm deleting my profile.

I agree.

A few weeks?

Choo soon.

Choose.

But how many months?

But even if you're developing something, how long until you like

measured in length?

So how do you think a couple figures this out that you think it's appropriate to talk about it?

I feel like A, women need to listen to their intuition because there's a lot of these guys out there that will be telling you who they are through their

signs and actions.

Yeah.

But not with their words.

Yeah.

Like

the one time I okay, I have one confession actually.

I was on a dating app once, and it was like the cheesiest, like worst, sketchiest one.

Um, I really wanted to go to XIV.

It was this hide used to do it in the summers.

And it was the last weekend, and I hadn't gone.

All my friends have boyfriends, and I'm like, I'm not waiting in line.

I'm gonna go to fucking XIV, hell or high water.

So I got an okay Cupid.

I'm like, I'm gonna meet a like promoter on OK Cupid.

Like, I'm going to fucking XIV.

I'm like, this is early 20s, cat.

So, I'm like, I easily could have gotten roofied and murdered and had no friends with me.

It's like the worst idea I ever had.

Literally, worst idea.

But sure enough, I meet this promoter.

So, the only time I personally ever use the app is like when I needed something,

yeah.

And that goal was met.

It was a crazy assumption.

But that's different from like a lot of

that's different from the conversation we're saying and a lot of like maybe like guys though This is where I have issues like if they need something like sex or not even sex like

let's say a guy met a girl on a dating app

and you're dating and the guy is telling you I want to date you

I want to be only with you.

This is amazing.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, and so a guy is dating a girl and vice versa.

And the guy is telling the girl, we're exclusive.

Exactly.

Like we're dating we're having a great time that's fantastic we're exclusive so i get this question a lot how long are you supposed to put up with the other person being still being on a dating app or how long is it appropriate for the other person because a dating app is for what to date people to meet people right if you met someone that really means something to you how long are you still gonna be on the dating app and the other person is supposed to say that's okay okay, that's okay, that's okay.

I get

tons and tons and tons of questions about it.

Some people say, hey, a few weeks, a few months.

No, I can't believe he did me.

I can't believe she did me.

That's like a big, big deal.

Like, how many months are you supposed to date someone until you think, hey, hi, are we getting out of this dating app or what's going on?

Okay, I actually remember.

I can't remember if this was a story about a friend or something I read on Reddit or something.

Yeah.

But like, honestly, if I did fuck with dating apps, I would do exactly what this chick did.

Okay, what did she say?

So apparently they were like at a group of girlfriends were at like this bride's bachelorette weekend and one of the friends is like wait, you're still on bumble.

When are you deleting it?

We're at your bachelorette weekend.

You're getting married.

And the girl is like, I'm deleting it.

after the wedding when i miss whatever because you know guys that's a little too much i'm not saying she's checking it it though, because bumble is what it is, so she just had it on, which wasn't checking, yeah.

She wasn't using it, but it was like one of these low-key things: like, don't get too comfortable, which a lot of guys need.

I'm sorry, like, okay, I'm still out there, some guy can take me away from you.

A thousand, a trillion percent.

So many guys just need this.

It doesn't matter if you're cheating, it doesn't matter what because they're predators, they want to feel like they still

they need to feel like there's a threat, really.

I feel like this in my observation.

Guys need to feel that.

That's a very interesting point because it's controversial,

but a lot of experts say the same thing.

And I've had people,

I've had experts that have all kinds of different opinions on this podcast.

But some of my past interviews, and you guys can go back there and check it out, some experts will say that men are predators, period.

They need to feel their loyalty.

They are psychological.

But the minute they feel like, oh, that's it, they're like, on to the next.

But so, how do you develop a successful relationship?

Yeah, exactly.

But even if they are, I feel it gets to your point, you got your prey, congratulations, you know.

But they can never feel like they really, instead of like, okay, think about like a lion or a cheetah or something like that.

Right, right.

Chasing an Impala and then devouring the Impala.

But like, I feel like, and with certain guys,

but the lions are just crazy loyal to the lioness.

Once they find their lioness, they're like, okay, that's it.

You know,

yeah, they keep coming back to her.

Yes.

I mean, I don't know.

So there is no loyalty with men.

Like, basically, not all men.

They hunt you, they take you, and then they're going to move to the next one.

Not always.

Not always.

Not always.

but i feel like even for the

most well-intentioned true gentleman out there yeah if they are like a red-blooded heterosexual yeah woman loving man

and they are even somewhat masculine i can't speak for gen z or all this androgynous

like so i don't know but the younger generation i'm just speaking from myself and the older generation exactly yes because the rules have changed i don't know big time,

but it changes, but you know what?

Science doesn't change.

That's the other thing.

I mean, people might want to change their pronouns, but science doesn't change.

Exactly.

And I'm not saying that in a disrespectful way.

No, no, we absolutely is, you know.

So, like, people be like, oh, yes, women are the same as men now with everything.

But, like, biology is what it is.

But, like, here's what I think.

Even the nicest guy in the world, they need to feel a little bit scared at certain points that they could lose their woman and they need to stay on top of their game.

A million percent.

I kind of

agree with you.

I am a late, late learner.

I used to be like, you know, I don't want to play games.

It is what it is.

If I like you, you like me.

But yeah, but you know what?

Now I'm getting to the point that I agree with you.

Men need to feel that, even if you're married, they need to feel fucking hunting.

Yeah, like

where is she?

What is she doing?

I want to conquer her.

I want to be after you.

I want to lose.

If they think, oh, this is too fucking easy.

And honestly, girls, if you don't like it, it's the truth.

Keep wearing sexy lingerie.

Keep being sexy in bed.

Keep making him guessing.

Yeah, because you know what?

That's what men like.

I kind of agree with you.

Do things when they're easy and convenient for you.

A million percent.

Because guys do things when it's easy and convenient for them.

I agree.

You know?

Make them a little scared.

Be like, oh, what are you doing tonight?

Be like, you could be sitting at home with a mask on, like, haven't shaved in four days.

Yeah, don't do that, by the way.

But don't tell them.

Be on top of your game.

Don't tell them.

Just be like, just be like, yeah.

I'm like deep in this true crime lifetime movie.

I'll respond when this movie's over.

And then be like, just got home, babe.

All right.

And then, like, if they say something like, oh, nice, where were you at?

Just be like, I hope you had a good day.

Exactly.

They don't even know everything unless they are doing the three F's.

And even then, girl, they don't even know know everything.

Even then, even then, it's like keep them guessing, yeah.

Men love it.

Everyone, all these guys, secretly a little bit masochistic, a little bit.

I agree, or yeah, it's the instinct lions.

Okay, we're gonna be right back.

This is a super fun impromptu episode of Cat on the Lose because you know what?

This is what

Cat on the Lose is all about 100% organic, 100% real, never edited.

It's different from from all podcasts out there.

It's real life.

And I'm here with my bestie, and it's Cat Square in the house, bitches.

Cat Square, Katrillionaires.

Woo!

We'll be right back.

Cheers.

I'm gonna patent this drink that you make.

It's too fucking good.

Oh, there's a fly in my drink.

Yellow roses in June is the name of the drink, right?

It's phenomenal.

We'll be right back.

So, we are having this crazy, crazy, organic, very raw conversation about dating apps, about bumbo, and about the new trend called fumble.

Fumble basically is you were on bumble or any dating app for that matter, you met someone, you're dating them, you like them, but you want to know if they're still out there dating other people or if they're loyal to you.

So, a lot of girls and a lot of guys started creating fumbles, fake bumbles, to see if the people they are dating are still there or lying to them.

Now, there are a lot of problems with this situation.

Problem number one,

you don't trust who you're dating.

That's my

first problem.

Like, basically, if me, Catherine, if I was dating someone and I feel I need to create a fumble to see if my date is still out there, to me, that's already a problem.

I do not want to date somebody I don't trust.

Do you agree, Kat, with a C?

So, yes, I agree under certain conditions.

Yeah.

I have some guy friends, right?

And they're ladies men.

And so, like, honest to God, sometimes they'll be like, wait, what?

You're having sex with this girl on a Tuesday at 9.15 a.m.

and y'all haven't met in person yet and she's coming over.

Uh, yeah, I tried to take her to breakfast, vlog.

Anyway, yeah, we're not talking about in general people that are on dating apps to have relationships but like if if girls are acting like this and expecting the guy to flip and be in a relationship i know no that's not gonna happen yeah but we are talking about

bumbo is a dating app it's not a fucking app

it's a dating app

in general oh like it was intention to be dating app yes so we're let's talk about because the number one question that we get i get on the podcast is about dating.

So we're not talking about like, I want to have a one-night stand.

Yeah.

That's a little bit more tender.

That's tender.

Yeah, but in general,

but in general, people go on bumbo on what was the other one you were saying, hinge.

Hinge, I guess.

Because like one of my friends, bless you.

Sorry.

Bless everyone in Los Angeles.

I have been so allergic.

My eyes are running.

People think I'm crying.

I'm like, I haven't shed a tear and five.

I don't know if 100% organic.

100%.

Oh my gosh, this is LA.

Smoke out.

I've been crazy allergic.

So, in general,

let's focus on dating.

You meet someone because you want to date them.

Okay, great.

Now, the new trend is: how do I trust this person?

She's telling me, he's telling me I'm only dating them, hence, fumble.

Yeah.

For me, personally,

the minute I have to create a fumble to check on someone I'm dating, I shouldn't be dating them because I don't want to date someone that I don't trust.

It depends, like, maybe you're creating it because you're trying to figure out if you should be thinking about them more seriously, or if you should keep them in the casual

or it means like maybe they're not telling you the truth,

or like you know, I guess it could be smart.

You're trying to figure out, like,

is this someone I should like, you know, take the guards around my heart down for?

Should I keep it up?

Yeah.

You know, it could be for various reasons.

Yeah.

So I guess some girls out there are just flat out crazy bitches, be going to guys' houses at 9.15 a.m.

Never met him on a Tuesday.

But now it's kind of like...

And if you're one of those girls, this doesn't apply to you.

No, not to me.

Yeah, but

like this conversation, because you cannot act like that, like...

like a hooker but for no money and then expect the guys to be like oh I had an epiphany I think I want you to be my wife like even if you're a wife material you just can't do that no absolutely not in my mind for me

the number one thing I have to have when I'm dating someone is I gotta trust them it's loyalty yeah so I would never jump into this fumble territory because the minute I would feel I need to create a fumble, it's over for me.

Because if I don't trust you, I don't want to be with you.

You know what I mean?

The other thing about you that is so special and listeners you probably picked up on this cat like is a like you know one of these people that cannot be full of shit no I can't I don't put up with lies yeah no I can't you have to have the open dialogue yes this is how you operate yes so like I don't like lies I honestly don't have time for it I think it's a huge waste of time I don't want bullshit I think I've been through enough yeah a lot of not just women but I'm just speaking from experience of like being friends with women.

A lot of girls are maybe scared to have this open dialogue.

Yes, you're so right.

They want to like sneak behind.

So that's why they create the fumble to be sneaky.

If you are a person like Kat and you're not

scared of the open dialogue,

and you still find yourself maybe thinking, create a fumble, then that's a red flag.

That's a sign

deep down you feel like this guy is being misleading.

Totally.

This guy or this girl, by the way, because girls do the same.

No.

Girls are usually better at you don't get caught.

Totally.

Second question.

How long

should you date someone?

Oh, I get this question.

All the time.

How long should you be dating someone until you have the conversation about deleting the dating app or until you think it's proper that the person you're dating deletes the dating app?

Yeah, because like...

That's a very controversial one.

And I feel like it's probably like varies a little bit by like, A, where you are in the United States.

Yeah, it does.

Like, the societal norms.

Like, I'm not sure.

Geography matters in this situation.

I think so.

Because, like, in Texas, people would be like, oh, because whenever I went back there in 2019, I helped my family.

It's like, hey, I'm late 20s, still single, no kids.

And like, I would go to social events or whatever.

Like, oh, maybe I'll meet some nice new friends.

And women would be like, What does your husband do?

And I'm like,

I have a dog.

Like, actually, it's a whole other

different culture.

So, like, maybe in Texas, they like might have,

you know, those places where people get wiped up beyond.

Yeah.

It might be different answers.

Totally.

Then in LA, people be like, oh, I'm going to be a bro my whole life

or whatever.

I don't know how guys speak.

Okay, so let's focus on the the LA coach because that's where we are.

We're in California.

You're dating someone you met through a dating app.

How long, in your opinion, and I'll tell you my opinion,

is it appropriate until you guys have this conversation?

Or you say, you know what?

Okay, we should be out of these dating apps, or this is not appropriate anymore.

I feel like the other thing with dating apps is like, okay, if y'all met on a dating app, then both of you know it doesn't matter if you say to other people, oh yes, we met at this magical thing through mutual friends, or whatever people say, but like each of you individually knows y'all met on this dating app where like each person was on the hunt, so to speak.

Yes, you cannot lie to each other, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, or maybe you never would have met if you lied for the dating app.

A thousand percent-edged sword, right?

Yeah, exactly.

Y'all met, now you like each other, but y'all met on this app, and now it's like, okay, at what point does it become an elephant in the room?

Exactly.

Where you're like, okay, are you still on the app?

Is it a month?

Is it three months?

Is it four months?

Is it six months?

Is Daryl?

What is normal?

What is comfortable for you?

What's like

very controversial because a lot of people send me these questions, like, what should I do?

No, no, no, I'm dating someone.

And the experts usually say there's not like a deadline, but this is the catch, okay?

This is

the catch.

the catch

One of my friends

One of my friends has been dating a guy for almost four months they met on Bumble

and The past for almost four months They're having this amazing relationship Relationship because they're only dating each other They're doing all kinds of stuff together.

They sleep in each other's homes They have these things that they love doing together.

You know, they met each other's friends, la la la la la.

It's developing into a nice relationship, totally stress-free.

They met on a dating app.

Now, she

said, Okay, I'm done.

I don't want to be on a dating app anymore because the whole goal of being on a dating app was, I want to meet a guy, at least for your friend.

And she was so sweet.

I've met her.

Yeah,

yes, you didn't meet her.

Yes, so she was like, Okay, I'm done.

I met this guy, we get along great.

He's telling me this.

Yes, we have the same interests, the same lifestyle.

I'm going to go for it and see what happens.

So she's like, okay, I'm done.

Thank God I'm out of the dating app.

And she finds out and he's like, I'm not.

I want to keep doing the dating app, but I'm only dating you.

Yes.

That's where it complicates things, right?

And for any male listeners,

I like, honestly, whenever she was telling us this, just from the couple times I've been around her, I was like,

I'm like always like sus of guys, right?

If y'all can't tell you, and I'm not mad at guys, again, it's biology, but I'm always like.

er on the side of men or predators.

And I was not getting that vibe from them when I met them.

I swear to God.

I know.

They look like they were an LA guy.

They look like the sweetest couple, right?

I was like, man, maybe, maybe this shit does work in L.A.

They had the vibe.

They liked the same thing.

He was very like, you know, I don't know.

I feel like I have a good sixth century for this.

And I was shocked whenever she called you all upset.

Yeah.

I was like, no, there has to be a misunderstanding.

Because I don't want to say I'm never wrong about this, but just in general.

And only two people know what's going on.

But basically, this guy told her, I am only dating you and I really like you.

But I'm still like

active on the app.

And and this was so one month goes by two months go by three months go by now it's the fourth month but like this didn't come out until like I don't know they were together for a while they were like couple mode yes couple mode couple mode

like call couple mode for sure yes like planning all of the weekends

you know the shit you do when you're a couple exactly planning weekends yeah constant communication

sleeping in each other's home yeah so that's a little more than just like oh I met you, we went on a few dates.

Not to mention, like, okay, the other thing,

because, like, honestly, at first, I was like, your friend misunderstood.

I didn't pick that up, but you know, I was only around them a couple times.

I know, me too.

Well, I haven't seen, I haven't even met him, him,

but I know her for a long time.

Yeah, yeah.

So now the question is.

Fourth month, okay, they've been dating.

They're kind of a couple, right?

Well, I guess because they're in a relationship.

The thing she was telling you you is like all of this stuff they're hanging out you know because like she's like lives on the east coast what miami yeah so it's not la but it's like similar to la yes it's like there's a lot of fresh meat out there well but still there's fresh meat everywhere but the point is

if you like someone you like someone yeah if you don't you don't that's like you know there's always a lot of hot guys after her yeah i'm sure there's a lot of hot girls after him but that's not the point the point is

if you like each other,

they would seem really into each other.

Exactly.

So this is the question.

How long would anybody put up with your partner being on a dating app?

The other thing, though, that I thought was a little sussed because I was like, wait, he's still on the app, but like, like, they're planning, you know, their weeks together.

So it's like,

is he lying?

Okay, A, either he has the app for quote-unquote no apparent reason because he's still only seeing her, or he's lying about what he's doing with his time.

Um, yeah, is he still dating some other people?

Yeah, because but that's the question: how long, and that's a very controversial one.

I send this question to a lot of my expert guests, yeah.

What did they like?

What did they have to say?

Okay, so all of them, and I can pull the answers, but all of them said one thing:

if it's a few weeks into dating, it's too soon.

If it's a few

months,

exactly.

All of them said, if you're dating someone for a few weeks, leave it alone, go forward with your life, do the same thing.

But every single one of these experts say the same thing.

If it's you're talking about a few months as adults.

And like you said, you're acting as a couple and you're making plans and you're like each other

doing every day then you're really being like on shady territory everybody deserves to know this is when you sit down and you're like okay are we on the same page because we

yeah exactly do we want the same thing totally i want this do you want this this not one exception all these dating experts that i've had the past two years they all say the same thing it gets to a point a few months is reasonable time that you decide you know if you're on the same page and if you're on the same thing so yeah and if like I don't know if you're like cat with a K

then you have this conversation and don't like get scared of oh maybe I lose this guy because you have to be true to yourself I think any woman Yes, like anyone and woman should if you're listening to this, just be true to yourself.

Amen.

Yes.

There's always more men out there, okay?

And there's always more.

There's always more girls, and there's always more men.

I mean,

there's always no other you.

Yes.

Not to get all, you know, no, and I agree.

But listen, I agree.

If somebody, I tell you from my experiment, and you guys can listen to 120 episodes of this podcast, I learned from experience.

Yeah.

You get what you think you deserve.

If you think you deserve shit, that's how people are going to treat you.

If you think, hey, I know my value, I know how fabulous I am, I know what a great partner I am, that's what you're going to get.

At the end of the day, you need to love yourself, right?

And, like, I think Picasso said this: there are two types of women: goddesses or doormats.

Amen.

I'm sorry, Picasso said it, not me.

And there's one thing that you said to me a few weeks ago that I will never forget for the rest of my life.

My grandmother said this always.

So, I'll let you say it.

The treasure doesn't do the hunting.

Yeah, let the predatory men do the hunting.

You're the treasure.

You're the goddess.

It doesn't matter how you love it.

Nothing matters.

The only thing that matters is the purity of your heart and what you can bring to the table in the relationship.

The minute you change the focus, and I'm saying from experience, this is why I love doing this podcast.

If you guys listen, I started this podcast literally two years ago,

and I think a little more, right?

When COVID hit.

if you listen to my first episodes, I was a fucking doormat, I was abused during my marriage for 15 years.

And abuse victims, you have the tendency once you start dating again, you go for the same guy.

Yes, a guy starts calling you like a piece of shit.

Oh, you dumb bitch.

Or they cheat on you, or they lie to you.

You think, oh, that's what I deserve.

Or, like, that's what your life is.

Exactly.

And it takes a very long time to understand, no what wait a minute i am beautiful i am gorgeous i'm intelligent i'm successful i work hard i'm ethical i'm loyal like you said like your grandma said i'm the treasure yeah and the minute you start thinking that way your partner is gonna think you're a treasure yeah and the other expression i can't remember who said this but i saw it in a johnny dpp movie about uh john dillinger or whatever never work when you're desperate and i don't mean actual actual work, but the mindset of being a person.

Exactly.

No, being desperate is a horrible, horrible mindset for anything.

Yes.

For relationships, for work, for love.

You shouldn't be desperate for anything.

Yeah, like snap out of it like a

follow-up Robins, watch some crazy

inspirational shit on yourself.

Take a cold shower, listen to this podcast again.

I agree.

You should never be desperate.

But the fun, interesting part about everything that we're talking about, even the fumble, the bumble how long dating apps This is yeah at the end of the day

Yeah, totally, but it's not a formula That's the interesting thing about it It's not like A B C and you do this It's like humans and men and women.

It's it's complex But my take on it is like you said at the end of the day value yourself.

Yeah.

I hope listen to yourself.

Listen to your heart because like when I was younger there will be a lot of times I wanted to believe a certain thing about a guy I was dating, right?

I wanted to believe it.

We all do.

I would see all the signs.

I would ignore my intuitive feelings and be like, you know, maybe I'm being dramatic.

Everyone loves calling me dramatic.

I know.

I used to hate it, but now I embrace it.

I'm like, sorry, I'm fucking dramatic.

I might be over it in like less than 12 hours, but

whatever.

You know, like, listen to your real feelings.

Yes.

Don't react on them, but listen to to them.

And at the end of the day, it's like about how you feel.

I don't think there is a perfect answer.

Like one month, get out of the dating.

Two months, get out.

But I think whatever makes you feel respected.

Yes.

I think at the end of the day, it's about being respected and feeling appreciated and loved.

Yes, appreciated.

Validated, appreciated, however.

Because if you're not, listen, if somebody, this is one thing that I learned.

You can, I was in a marriage for 15 years.

Every year I thought, this person is going to change for me.

Nobody's going to change for you.

They either appreciate you or they don't.

They either respect you.

People change because they want to change or because they got a traumatic head injury and are forced to change.

Yeah, well, you know, like, well, that's what I'm saying.

I got loved out of me.

But I'm telling my friend.

Other than that, I'm like literally short of those three things happening.

It's not going to change.

Don't hold your breath.

Don't hold your breath.

I don't care what smoke is blowing up your way.

Yeah, so at the end of the day, the conclusion is there is no because everybody sends me these questions.

How long I'm on a dating app.

This is the answer.

There is not a formula.

If you feel the person you're dating is respecting you and values you keep going you.

If you feel they don't appreciate you and they're like, this is how I don't want to feel like I'm a food on the menu.

Yes, this is what I think is weird.

You're not food on the menu, exactly.

You are the menu.

Exactly.

You're the menu on film.

You're the menu on the home.

We all are.

We all are.

So, if you hear you're dating someone and they're like, oh, wait a minute.

Maybe I'm going to keep looking on bumble, whatever, to see what's out there.

Get the hell out.

The other thing is, and it took me many years to be this confident, but I learned this.

If If you just let the guy do that and keep doing your own thing,

they will always find a flaw because the guys like me that are like, oh, what's the next best thing?

They will find a flaw in the next girl.

Of course.

It's just a matter of time.

And then they'll be like, damn, you know, Kat was really good.

And they'll start being like, trying to hit you up.

And it's just like, oh, wait.

Oh, no.

If you saw what else was out there and you're still coming back, oh, I forgot about you.

That's calling ordering food.

You know, you look at the menu, like, oh, I had pasta tonight, maybe tomorrow this day.

No, that's chef is a good thing.

No girl on the planet deserves to be food on the menu.

So, if you feel you are in any kind of relationship and not try to get the hell out, yeah, yeah, I think prioritize yourself, yes,

your needs,

because I feel like it's so weird.

The other thing is

it's dynamic, you know, like until 2012,

it didn't even exist.

But now it's a reality, and I think it's really, really important, especially for us women

to understand, don't let men order you like your fucking pizza.

If you meet a guy on a dating app, I know a lot of girlfriends.

I know one of my best friends got married to a guy.

She's like, I mean, like, so many.

Like, totally syndrome.

Speak for themselves.

And, like, even if these guys, you know, at the right time, the right exterior, external conditions, everything is met.

Even these guys that like use the dating apps like free sex for a long time, the right conditions are met.

Yeah, totally, you know, totally results in a marriage.

It is what it is.

I agree.

But that's the fact.

If you meet someone that you feel, okay, he's appreciating me.

He knows my value.

He knows he doesn't want to lose me.

Go for it.

If you feel they're having whatever it is with you and is still looking around like on a menu, get the hell out.

That's my take on it.

What do you think?

People are individual, eh?

Yeah, you know, they can't be boxed into a menu because

I don't know who said this.

I like to attribute it to Kanye, but I don't think it was Kanye.

I think it was just something he retweeted.

It goes, Someone will always be younger, someone will always be pretty sure.

Someone will always be smarter, but they will never be you.

For sure.

So it's like, okay, you know, all these other people might have their shit, but like, they can never be me.

No, we are all individuals.

That is your superpower.

A million percent.

We are like, we all have our individual superpowers and personalities on it.

Yeah.

So at the end of the day.

They liked you enough to swipe whatever direction they send you.

Yeah, whatever it is.

But at the end of the day, all of you guys, dozens and dozens of messages that send me the same question.

How long is Chillong?

Should I be on the date?

What is the data?

This is the answer.

Do you feel somebody appreciates you?

Do you feel they value you?

Stay.

Yeah.

Do you feel they're

can you catch yourself up?

Let's fince it.

If you answer those questions, you feel appreciated, you feel valued.

Don't because I also, conversely, I have friends where I'm like, no, this guy's really into you.

Like,

more than they're into them, but the girls will try to fuck it up, you know, try to like catch these guys and this kind of like stuff.

I tell you one thing about me.

I tell you one thing about me because I like being very raw and very, very real.

I don't date often at all because I am obsessed about quality as opposed to quantity.

But this is what I tell you.

When I do date someone, I give them my all,

my energy, my time, my consistency,

my brain.

But I give, so like, like you're here with me now, I give you my all.

Yeah, and I'm right.

so you know one million percent I'm there with you like when I'm with that

with a K you always know you always know always you always know the truth even if you want to try to I am like a million percent there with that one person that I choose to date yeah and I think it's a good idea that you should feel the same from the person that you're dating you know yeah the other last thing I will say and so far as using cliche expressions that may or may not have been said by Kanye we love cliches, but we are gonna Google if it's Kanye's hand.

I don't I don't think it would be

such a fucking dream guest.

Kanye, Kanye, clutch a cattle.

Kanye also, no, I'm like the biggest Kanye fans.

Like, sometimes when these younger guys be like, what's your handle?

And I'm like, Titos.

And they're like, yeah, I know.

And then, like, if I think they're like remotely cute, I'll be like, hey, are you a Kanye fan?

And if they have to pause for two seconds, they're like, okay, bye.

Exactly.

I'll be like, okay, this fool's trying to figure out if I'm a Kanye fan and like trying to gauge on, like, you're not a Kanye fan.

No, I know.

You have to be a Kanye fan.

You have to be a Paris Hilton fan.

That's it.

You can be a Satan worship fan.

Okay, now you guys know if you want to date Kat with a C,

you gotta like Paris Hilton, you gotta like Kenny West, and you gotta know how to make great drinks or drink her drinks.

I mean, basically, you have to be able to provide the three F's:

Fuck me, feed me,

finance me, and then leave me alone, leave Taco Bell and Diamonds at the door and then like wait until I miss it.

That's a whole other episode.

I mean,

I don't know.

My personal preference.

I love it.

So you guys have it.

I am not.

I don't think I'm the exact same person.

You're a little different.

I am a major sexual sexual.

Yeah.

You're like a real, like, you know,

but we do agree in one thing.

I need, I want a connection with a person's brain.

I want to feel that

they're 100% there with me.

If I feel

like that.

Yes, exactly.

If I feel that you are not there, that you're somewhere else, this is why fumble would not work for.

If I feel that you're like, like you said,

looking around on the hunt, oh, this grass is green, but let me see what's.

I'm like, okay, go for it.

Go for it.

I had to learn this a long time ago, and ironically, or maybe not ironically, all these guys that I like had to learn these hard life lessons they still call me they're still like you're the one that got away i'm like oh yeah this is like 12 years later and you're still single but you're calling me because i wisened up and was like if this guy can't see what he fucking has he's not smart enough exactly i agree if he doesn't value

then later for me you need to understand

appreciate what you

appreciate quality first and yes you know you bring to the suck it in when i'm with someone i give them my all and i want i the fairy tale, I want everything, I want it all.

I want the person's attention, they need to appreciate you, your amen.

I think every woman deserves that, you know.

Not every woman, some women are scandalous.

You think so?

Oh, well, I'm just saying, like, I mean, the whole like, I love you, I'm just calling it like it is, you know.

Like, we be dealing with scandalous, secretly hating hoes all the time, like so.

Oh, letting these bitches and women be like getting side-eye, like, oh, sorry, I'm nice, and I like myself.

Which makes me sad because I think

I love women that support other women.

You have to support each other because, like,

we're stronger together, you know?

Like, women, okay, again, we don't, I don't know if you're going to include this or not, but I had this idea over the COVID lockdown.

I was with my mom, and I'm like, mom, you know, humanity has progressed.

We have sperm banks.

Not only do we have sperm banks, we have the Fairfax Virginia sperm bank.

It's harder to get your sperm accepted into the sperm bank than it is to get into Harvard.

I shit not.

This is a real story.

They have all of this premium prime, like harder to get into the sperm bank than Harvard sperm, okay, right?

And now they have IVF.

Women, I'm sorry, like men, y'all are cool, you know, back in the day when you had to like hunt and gather whatever.

Now it's like, we have surrogates, we have IVF, we don't even need men, right?

So I'm saying, like, women

supporting each other.

I mean, we need men, I guess.

I agree that

I am all

of my work.

All of my work.

I am a huge support.

I think all about women empowerment, women supporting women.

It makes me so sad when a girl is like a frenemy or a secret hate.

Yes.

And if you're not like that, it's all about it.

I think when we unite, we're so much stronger.

And I love, love the power of women.

women

at the same time I love men

I love being in a relationship I love the intimacy about it I love the great sex that comes with intimacy I like like the masculine man show exactly me too like non-masculine no like I said even though the lion the primitive thing about a man you know being a dominant and dominating in bad exactly I love that yeah and this is what this is all about like being with the right person, being with the right guy, but having them respect you.

Respect is the number one thing.

Appreciate it.

Amen.

And this whole thing.

And at the end of the day, the fumble, and because it's a trend, I've been getting dozens of messages.

I haven't even been able to read like half of it, but it's

the same thing.

Fumble, fumble, fumble, fake, fake, fake.

But listen, at the end of the day, you need to be happy with who you are.

are you need to trust your partner you need to feel like he is into me as much as I am into you otherwise if you don't feel that way get the hell out and women know guys that listen to this women yeah

it doesn't matter if we have the fumble or not we have a sixth sense so and the guys say the same thing I get messages from guys too

Oh, it's into me.

Is she cheating on me?

What's wrong?

And I'm like, look.

The fact that the guys are even asking about the girl means the girl is doing something right to keep this guy.

Yeah.

One time, and that's the last thing I'm going to say before I let you guys go because this is a really long episode.

I don't remember whoever,

wherever I read this, but I never forgot this phrase.

Don't ever give somebody a chance to be in a position to lose you.

Meaning, like if they're in a position to lose you, like cheating on you, lying to you, or something, you know.

Like where you would accept behavior that could be a loss.

Yeah, they deserve to lose you.

You know what I mean?

1000%.

If they are in, they put you in that position, like, okay, then just, okay, thank you, bye.

Yeah, yeah.

Somebody that values you, they're not going to want to lose you.

If that makes sense.

A thousand percent.

And that's it, you know?

And not a thousand percent.

A quatrillion percent.

Qatrillion with a C and a K.

And this is but with a K first because no otherwise Calvin Klein.

Yeah.

You know, trademark infringement.

This is Cat Square in the house.

This is we're a little bit boozy.

I made magical drinks.

But this, yeah, she makes the best drinks.

But I want to hear like what the listeners have to say and like

where you live.

Yeah.

People live in Ireland or something.

They do.

They do.

That's it.

This is one thing that I always

get so emotional about it because when I look at all the listeners and the downloads and everything, it's so cool because I get listeners from all over the United States and

Ireland, London, Brazil, Australia.

Yes, and it's crazy exciting.

And I listen, if I can help you guys in any way, shape, or form.

And also, we are Curious Cats.

I want to know what the dating is.

This podcast is for you.

This is just like an organic conversation.

This is what I love about doing it.

Yes.

Send messages.

Let's keep going.

Yeah, let's keep going with this conversation.

This was amazing.

We love you.

And I love you.

Thank you.

I love you.

Chiming in.

I can't see.

Yeah, to the sea.

At the end of the day,

people really throw shade at me for my views, but I'm like, I can't.

No, listen.

So I want to know what the listeners feel.

So far, the comment is, you're amazing.

You're the best sidekick I've ever had.

But because you're real, you're honest.

And my listeners know who they know.

Like you said, I don't lie.

You can't.

You're not.

I don't lie.

No, I'm not like, oh, your hair looks great, but I'm like looking at your face.

No, listen, I don't lie.

That's one thing that you guys are always going to get from me.

And I think when it comes to dating and relationships,

this is the tough thing about it.

You have to be raw.

You have to be you.

And the number one most, okay, another cliche shit.

I'm sorry.

I love cliches.

But like, okay, they're cliche because they resonate with people, which means that there is truth in them.

So, sorry clichés for the bad publicity.

But when you lie to yourself, you lie to everyone.

There you go.

There you go.

If like you're evaluating, do I feel valued?

Do I sense this?

And you're trying to tell yourself logically, oh, he's done this, but this hasn't happened.

You try to talk yourself into it, but if you're lying, you know.

And guys.

Guys are the worst about it because they're generally, in my personal experience, not self-aware enough to even know when they're lying and when they're not lying.

But that's oh, that's not good at all.

It's a different podcast, but like, guys, be honest with you yourself and your communication.

Yeah, that is all we ask.

And to me, this is what I'm gonna say about fumble.

If you feel in your heart you need to create a fumble

because of someone you met on Bumble or any dating app, that's probably yourself.

It's true, probably

crazy self-sabotaging bitch.

Exactly, because it's probably not the right person for you.

Yeah, if you're a normal girl that is not like, you know, because I know a lot of these girls.

I want to be with somebody I can trust.

Period.

And that's the most masculine, protective thing.

Yes, I want to be with somebody that wants to be with me, obviously.

And

feed you.

That we have a phenomenal chemistry, that I have phenomenal chemistry with.

But I want to, at the end of the day, I want to trust you.

That's it.

Like, another huge thing.

Respect.

I can't be with someone embraces.

I I can be maybe even with a horrible person if I could find respect for them.

Exactly.

Unpopular opinion, but like I take respect over everything else.

Amen.

Respect and loyalty.

So I hope you guys take something from this.

This was amazing.

Cat on the loose, cat square in the house.

If you live in like Siberia,

if you live in Antarctica, I want to know what

God is like and I hope to God our podcast gets to Siberia.

We're gonna try to send it all over the world.

Our messages:

love,

sex, happiness, go for it, honesty, and this is organic.

Love you, love you.

We'll see you soon.