Actor Ricardo Chavez plays the yes or no game

Yoo-hoo!

This is a very special Cat on the Luz from LA.

For those of you that don't know, I grew up here.

I love the town.

I love the city.

I am so excited.

And I have such a special guest by my side, actor Ricardo Chavez.

Hi, Ricardo.

Hey, guys, how are you?

Thank you so much for doing this again.

Always, my pleasure.

Thank you, guys.

Now, Cat on the Luz audience is bigger, much, much bigger than the first one that you did.

So I'm super excited that you're willing to answer our questions again of course it's a pleasure thank you how do you love la

i love la it's it's a different town it's a it's a you know it's not it's not miami i can tell you that but it's there's so much creativity so much going on i'm in love with it i agree with you and i have to say we are doing this live together instead of via zoom we're sitting on the rooftop of the soho house in west hollywood and it's such a gorgeous afternoon and i love your style because you said let's just have some wine yes of course.

I mean let's live a little bit of life.

You know we work so hard.

Why not?

Yes.

And I okay so we have under 30 minutes and I got tons of questions for you.

So are you ready for the fire?

Speak fast.

Okay.

First question.

Since we are in LA I gotta ask something about you know the industry here and the culture.

Do you think it's harder to date in the entertainment industry, being in LA, being an actor?

Or do you think it's baloney dating is hard for everyone everywhere?

Well, I think there's two parts for that answer because it may be easier for actors to date,

but it's maybe not, we are not dating the right person.

Because as an actor, people are not looking at you or the person.

They are looking at the character they saw in a specific show.

So, yeah, I think it's complicated in any area.

I agree with you.

So, you don't think it's like just because you're an actor in this industry might be a little harder?

You think mere mortals

have the same problem?

Well, no, being an actor, yes, it may make it harder because exactly because of that, because people don't see you,

they see somebody else that is not you, and maybe you just want to meet somebody normal who doesn't know who you are.

How do you think we go through that?

Like you're an actor, and if you want to date somebody real, how do you figure out the the fakes from the reals well if i were doing that well the good thing about la is that there's so many celebrities nobody pay attention to that so you can be at the supermarket you see this huge a listers and you don't even recognize them that is so true that that's that's an advantage that is so true like nobody bothers them yeah it's funny nobody stops and takes pictures of them yeah that's one good thing depends depends sometimes they they do mostly for us who come from the spanic markets they it's a different area I mean I was a couple of days ago having lunch in a place and they stopped for a while taking pictures the cooks and I mean it was beautiful I love them but yeah sometimes they do that

sometimes

not all the time one time I was having sushi at Matsujiza like a couple years ago and Charlize Terrence sat right next to me and she was wearing sweatpants and sweatshirt no makeup whatsoever her hair was wet and she was sitting all by herself at the bar eating sushi.

And I was almost dying of a heart attack.

I was so starstruck, and I was dying to say hi and do pictures of her and everything.

But I was like, no, I gotta play cool, right?

Because I'm in LA and this woman is just enjoying herself.

You need to be cool in LA.

You cannot do those things.

But I really wish I would have taken a picture of her because I couldn't believe it.

You know, she didn't have an entourage, she didn't have her assistant near her.

Nothing, nothing, nothing.

I see people like that every day at coffee shops, at the market, at a a mall you see everywhere no i do too this week i went uh to dinner with a friend on rodeo drive you know do you watch housewives i don't you don't you know who lisa van der Pomp is

well she she's one of the housewives but she also owns a bunch of restaurants in LA so you need to know who she is

invited so Lisa von der Pomp listening to this yeah Lisa I'm gonna tag her but anyway She was having dinner with her husband and two dogs because they take their dogs every same thing.

I was like, oh my god, I want to do a picture.

But I played like cool.

I didn't want to be like the embarrassing tourist.

Anyways, so

is there one?

You're single, right?

You're still single, or are you kind of well?

That's

complicated.

It's going to remain to remain a mystery because this is the thing.

If I weren't single, I would like to protect my woman from this weird industry and from all the stuff.

And if I weren't, I would not reveal it anyway because because you know it's just better to navigate I love that having a relationship with yourself and just be cool about it you want to I love that you want to keep something about your life yes exactly exactly my my private life for me is sacred

no I feel the same way it's funny that you said that exactly but let me ask you a question that they sent for you is there one trait one characteristic that a woman must have in order for you to pick your lifetime partner yes

to want to be better in every area.

Well, it's like a combination of this.

To want to be better meaning somebody who is trying to excel in whatever it is she does, meaning she's passionate about something.

Somebody who reads, that's very important to me because I love to have conversations, intelligent conversations.

And it's frustrating to talk to somebody who have nothing to say.

Oh my god, I agree with you so much.

It's not just the looks, right?

Oh no, the looks is nothing.

The looks, they go away.

Yes.

But it's within.

I mean, as cheesy as it sounds, no, it may sound, it's for me, it's the most important part.

It is so true.

I couldn't agree with you more.

Sometimes guys ask me, what is your type?

And I'm like, my type?

Somebody with a brain.

Intelligent people.

Yeah, exactly.

Oh, how tall should I be?

I'm like, I don't care.

It's more like about what's inside your heart.

Exactly.

And somebody who's a good person, you know?

Yes.

I mean, you know that when you go to a coffee shop or restaurant with somebody, the way they treat waiters or other people, you know exactly what kind of person.

Oh my god, I agree with you 1 million percent.

Yep.

Another question that they send, it's a very touchy subject.

Everybody that listens to my podcast knows I don't like the word hate, so I'm not gonna say I hate, but I dislike a very, very, very much

ghosting.

What is your opinion on ghosting?

Do you think it's okay to do that to someone you're dating, or do you think it's so not okay?

Not at all.

It's a cowardice.

You cannot just disappear from somebody's somebody's life who have given you the attention you thought you deserved.

So guys, don't do that.

Girls, don't do that.

Just be a man with a woman.

Face, talk to the person, hey, I'm not interested.

Or whatever, but don't let people hang you.

I could not agree with you more.

I love that you said that.

I think it's, like you said, the person is just such a coward.

And a lot of guys that I interviewed, they're like, oh, but you know how men are.

I'm not like that.

I'm sorry.

Man, I don't know what man, not me, that's not a man.

So I'm sorry, but...

It's a coward.

Yes.

If you're dating someone, I think everybody has the right to change their mind.

Let's make that clear.

Yeah, but and even if you don't want to like call and make a conversation, I think at the very, very least you can send a text or something, right?

Well, if you had, you know, if you did any kind of effort to be with that person in the first place, at least make the same effort to let them know with respect why are you not interested anymore.

I think they deserve at least that.

Yeah, I love you.

That's why I like you because you have no really because you because like you said it's all about character, you know, but

you'd be shocked how many men, it happened to friends of mine, it happened to me once.

You'd be shocked how many men are just like, they just disappear because they don't want to deal with it, you know.

Grow up.

And by the way, girls too, grow up.

Face it.

If you don't want that guy anymore, just talk to him.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And you can always, you know, worst case scenario, be friends with that person.

You never know.

You can be your best friend or maybe in the future you can work together.

Who knows?

I think nobody likes to be rejected, but I think you can still do it in such a polite way.

You don't have to be rude, right?

Yes, with class.

Exactly.

Love it.

Next.

Dating apps.

I mean, it's...

Iffy, some people love it.

Some people hate it.

During COVID, it's tough because where the hell are we going to meet

people?

But, you know, a lot of people on dating apps are just horrible people they lie about their profiles blah blah blah what do you think about it have you ever tried it would you try it I don't know if I'll try it

I mean I don't have a lot of experience with those things

and you just said it people lie about themselves but of course

There's many people, let's say a celebrity, they don't have the time, they don't know how to meet somebody, or somebody who's very busy, a company, a CEO or so or whatever.

They need help.

So I don't know if there are real apps who really work, who are serious.

I have no clue, but not against it.

It's just I don't

have the experience.

So nobody's gonna find your profile.

Well, they have found me, but it's not me.

People found me.

Fake ones.

Yeah, exactly.

And I'm like,

yeah, it's not me.

Yeah, no, it has happened to me too, of course.

People found me on a dating profile.

Of course, I'm sure that happened to you too, fake Instagram accounts.

And believe it or not, a few years ago, somebody found my pictures on an escort site.

I swear to God.

That's cool.

Somebody found my pictures and put it on the escort site.

Right.

But I guess I have to meet them for...

But it's horrible.

I know.

There's a lot of phoniness around there.

So you used to live in Miami.

Now you're living in LA.

Do you see a difference?

in terms of meeting people in general?

Or do you think LA is easier?

Do you think LA is harder how do you feel about it well the thing with LA is that this is a town where people come to get something to conquer some dream some passion so it's different than Miami Miami families go to build their own life but here you see musicians models actors writers whatever it is coming for the only sole purpose of getting something so it's a different crowd people are so concentrated on what what is they are going after, it makes it, I think, more difficult because it's a little bit more superficial.

I mean, I wrote about that in my first book.

I mean, people go to a party, to an event, they don't ask your name, they ask what is it that you do, what do you do?

If you answer, let's say, an actor asks me, What do you do?

and I say, I'm a producer, they stay, oh, tell me more.

But if I'm another actor, they will just turn around and go away.

It's horrible.

Yes, they don't care about the human on the other side, just what can they get out of it?

That is that's tough.

Yeah, I think people should, but like I said, they go to parties and it's kind of like networking.

They're interested in selling their own fish.

They don't want to get to know you as a human being.

So that's that's a tough one in LA.

People fake a lot because they don't they are not proud of themselves or their own essence.

They don't know themselves.

They don't date themselves.

That's why they have to go out and have this

part they are playing.

That is not real.

Do you have a suggestion like somebody that has never been here or somebody that just moved here somebody that doesn't know the industry that well do you do you what would you say like how do you filter fake people from real people how do you meet new friends?

Well I think

LA can become a very lonely place for many people because of what I just said.

Yes.

But having said that,

there's a lot of people that are very interested in meditation and yoga and exercise and going hiking and whatever it is that you like.

Go to those places.

You will find people who are not necessarily looking for something from you, just enjoying the place or whatever they are doing.

I don't go to any, I mean, I don't go anywhere.

I'm not a hermit.

But I go to my training classes.

I go to my shootings.

You just work, work, work, work, work.

I love to work.

I love to create.

I mean, I have no time to waste.

I know.

You're a busy beaver.

Yeah, I love it.

I love to be doing something.

I know.

I know.

We are workaholics.

Yes.

We're always on the go.

So, I want to do a little game with you if you are game.

Uh-oh.

Well, it depends.

Okay, that's the game.

You have to answer yes or no.

That's it.

No explanation.

No, no.

And you are allowed to take the fifth on one of those.

But it's nothing too bad.

How many questions are you?

One, two, three,

four, five.

I think five or six.

But I mean, it's nothing like per so personal that that, you know,

I'm not gonna intrude in your life too much.

But this, believe it or not, too much.

You know, as I was posting stories on my Instagram, the girls are like, oh man,

they wanna know everything about you.

So I have to ask all of these questions that I'm going to ask your questions.

So it's kind of funny.

Okay.

But I like that your game for answering them.

All right, let's shoot.

Let me start with an easy one.

Cheating.

Is it a deal breaker in a relationship, or do you think it's possible to forgive and fix it?

Just a yes or no?

No.

Okay.

No, maybe.

No cheating.

No cheating.

You're out.

You know, it's interesting that every guy I interviewed a bunch of guys like a couple weeks ago that they have a podcast and they all said the same thing.

I thought men would be more flexible, like

but it's interesting that most guys like don't want to deal with this shit.

I don't think it's a guy's thing.

I think it's a you know, why would you want to give a chance to somebody that you cannot trust anymore?

No.

It's just not going to work.

I mean,

of course, there are, they may be times where there's something going on and you might have to do it and you should do it because nobody's perfect.

And who are you to be all like inflexible?

But if you ask me, I'd rather just know.

I know, I'd rather just know.

Because to me, it's all about loyalty.

I think loyalty is.

It hurts so much when somebody does something like that.

It's just and like you said, it makes me wonder how many more times is the person cheating, and then you gotta like rebuild.

I don't know.

To me, it's like if you're not loyal, that's okay, just go.

Exactly.

Next.

okay, a tough one now.

Threesomes.

Yes or no?

No.

I'm gonna be safe on this one, no.

I'm gonna be safe.

But you kind of like you're in the middle.

Because I was gonna say it depends.

I mean, why are you doing that?

What is it that you need?

Yeah, it's kind of not like a yes or no answer.

The personal why what are the reasons?

That's a tough yes or no, right?

But I mean, I guess or no.

I guess no.

No, you're gonna laugh at the next one.

Swinging.

Now.

Now.

Oh, big no.

I know.

Nobody touches my woman.

I love that.

I interviewed the swinger a while ago, and I've been getting a lot of questions about the swing.

How do you swing?

No, I just interviewed the swinger.

I agree with you.

It's not my cup of tea.

I don't judge, but I'm, I don't know, it's just not what I enjoy.

I respect my woman too much to

share her or put her in a position where she would have to deal with that.

And I don't think your woman would want to share you with a bonus.

I don't think either.

Yeah, I don't think so.

Three people sent you that question, by the way.

Are you proposing something?

Probably.

Probably, right?

Probably they wish they were.

I think I know the answer on this one, but I'm going to ask.

Watching reality TV, like uh goody pleasure, like housewives, cartrashians, it's not you know.

No,

I'm an artist, no.

No, you're an artist.

Not even like a guilty pleasure to relax on a Sunday night.

That doesn't relax me.

That that puts me in a bad mood because it's so...

Oh my god, no, no, no.

You know what?

It's funny.

I don't even have TV channels because I don't have time.

But of course I look at all the stuff on social media and everything because I feel like I need to be on top of everything that's going on.

But I feel bad for them.

I feel really bad for them because I think like especially the super wealthy ones, it makes me think why are you putting yourself in this position?

But the whole world like you know picking like even us I mean I'm not even famous you are but just the little I do on my social media and podcasts people are like nitpicking your life criticizing and then you're doing like on national TV and I'm thinking why would you put yourself through that?

Okay in there are cases where I think it's important because I was about to do one a few years ago and I wanted to do it because I thought it was important.

It was the single dad show.

I raised, many people know I raised my kids alone and when my kids were little, this production company approached me and they wanted me to be with my kids on the single dad show.

And I wanted to do it because there are so many guys doing this.

They didn't have the respect.

People don't value them.

And it's such a tough thing to do being a guy.

Oh my gosh.

So I wanted to do that for that reason so if it's a reality show that helps socially in any way of course I know but if it's just you know the yelling and the scandal and the oh my god no

naked oh my god he's naked oh they're having sex what no come on guys I know no it's completely different if you're sending a message or showing people something that might be helpful to their lives yes I agree I would totally do it but if it's just like you said scandal and embarrassment And then when I see like how much these girls are like suffering and all the, and then I see adults, that's another thing that bothers me too, especially as a woman.

All the gossipy thing, like one fighting with the other, another talking about the other one.

And I think as adults, right?

Yeah.

The vulgarity.

There's nothing.

better than class.

Yes.

In any way, in any of them situations.

That's not class.

And just talking about each other and you know fighting and I'm all like about women supporting

human beings.

No, we don't need them.

I know.

So, I mean, I love them, I adore them, and kudos for the show.

So, I'm not trashing.

We're not trashing reality TV, please.

Like I said, I wish I would have taken a picture with Lisa van der Pomp.

I'm a huge fan, but I kind of don't understand why they do it.

Let's just put it that way.

That's let's see, next.

Having a fling or sex with a co-star, someone you're working on a movie or a thing is like having an affair?

Yeah, like yeah, a little, yeah, a little onset.

Set affair.

But I mean, I guess it's the same as not being an actor.

If you had it with a co-worker,

why are you doing it?

Nothing wrong about two single adults doing whatever they want, but is that good for you?

You need to ask that question.

Yeah, but I guess the question was more because it's someone you work with.

Do you think that, well, it was supposed to be a yes or no question, but let's just go.

No, sorry, you're right.

No, but no.

then but I'm interested let's let's just explore it for a minute because a lot of girls send this question I guess the question was more because in terms if you work with somebody do you think it makes the the work relationship complicated this is what happens well you're asking directly for as an actor right in action of course we're asking in your case

because in in when you're an actor

This is what happens.

I have done this study because I'm passionate about psychology and human nature.

You spend, let's say you're doing a TV show you spend 16 hours a day six days a week with somebody you don't see your family for a year or more

you are with that with

and and some actors who are not maybe they don't know themselves or they are not

trained well or whatever it is they start to believe the part they are playing And we see this every single day.

That's why we see so many co-stars having these things and then divorcing or separating or whatever.

It's not real.

Yes.

That's not real.

It's easy for them because you're there, but it's going to cause harm to somebody.

Most of the time.

I'm not saying it's impossible, but I don't think it's easy to find your woman, your man in that situation.

It's not real.

It's not real.

So proceed with caution.

Yeah, or no, don't proceed, man.

Don't proceed.

Just be safe.

Yeah.

So in general, you would not go into the territory of dating somebody or no no no I

my my craft for me is sacred.

That's how I have fed my kids all my life.

That's how I want to become you know legendary or immortal.

So that's very important to me.

I wouldn't mess with it.

Work is work.

If I'm with somebody, sure, it's a big no.

Yeah, work is work.

I think I agree with you on that one.

I don't think I would even consider being involved with somebody I work with because it just makes everything complicated.

Last but not least,

if you are single or worse single, a woman taking the first step and asking you out, do you think no,

I think the man should do it, I'm the gentleman, or do you think yes, that sounds fantastic and women should be able to ask a guy out?

Yes, but with a butt.

With a butt.

So, yes, why not?

Women can do whatever they want.

Why not?

If they want to.

But guys, always be the man.

Always be a gentleman.

Even if they approach first, even if they

do whatever they do, they may do first.

We have always to be, we should always be the guys who will conquer, will treat them like princesses, will treat them like royalty, will bring the flowers, pay all the bills.

pick them up, open the door, you know, all these things.

Sometimes guys think that because if a woman does it makes the first step, it's oh, then I'm gonna get comfortable and just have her do it.

Maybe they don't appreciate it.

Exactly, and that's the wrong, the wrong.

But if has it ever happened to you?

Or even if it did, would you think, even if you don't wanna go out to the press, would you think, oh, that's really nice that she was courageous enough to do that?

Of course it's admirable and it's nothing.

You wouldn't think nothing bad of it.

No, not at all.

It's wonderful.

I mean, so you don't think like, because this is debatable.

A lot of guys say, no, I'm old-fashioned.

I and you know I want to go I want to invite her out I want to text first da da da da da and a lot of guys say no I think it's amazing I think the woman should do whatever she wants.

I think that's a little bit of macho control because I'm as old school as it comes.

I mean I'm very old school like very old school but I don't see anything wrong about it as long as you do what I just said.

So like being the guy who has to control every step of a dating, it's a little bit different.

That's a different thing.

I love that you said that.

Yeah.

Don't hate me.

No.

I think a lot of men are like you.

They say, I'm super old-fashioned.

I want to invite the woman out.

And a lot of girls send this question, like, well, but what if, you know, nowadays, if I see a guy, I should be able to.

So it's kind of, I'm not sure.

I never invited a man out just because it's not my personality.

Although I do think.

But if you did, there's nothing wrong with you.

Exactly.

Although I do think, even like, you know, when you're dating a guy, and like, if I want to text him, I just text.

I don't play this game, like, oh, I'm going to wait.

She sends you flowers and you're a guy, that's amazing.

That's amazing.

And I think that's what I say.

If the guy likes me and I send him a text, he's going to be like, oh, she's so cool that she doesn't play these games.

You know, that's how I feel.

I just follow my heart and my instinct.

100%.

Yeah, I love it.

You survived.

You did not play the fifth hundred.

I did.

Why would I?

Yeah, you're very smart.

Congratulations.

You see how that was funny?

It was supposed to be a yes or a no, but the questions were so rich and interesting that the girls sent that we ended up like

going on and on.

Because it's not that easy.

Goes to show it's not always a yes or no question.

Exactly, exactly.

Thank you.

Now, one super quick last yes or no question.

This is a very easy one.

Will you come back for another episode?

Absolutely, yes.

Thank you so much.

This was so much fun.

Cheers.

This was a fabulous cat on the loose on a gorgeous Wednesday in LA.

And people ask why the real estate in Los Angeles is so expensive.

Did you ever hear the answer?

Look at the sky.

It's always freaking so blue and fabulous.

So they have this joke like you're paying for the weather.

Well, that's right.

It's not as humid as Miami.

It's beautiful.

It's always perfect.

Thank you so much, Ricardo.

This was amazing.

Congratulations.

Congratulations about your work, your career.

Your Insta is so people can follow you.

Ricardo Chavez3.

Ricardo Chavez33.

And I'm going to upload the episode right now, and then I'm going to put some videos of us on my Instagram so everybody can follow you.

Yes, thank you.

Cheers.

See you soon.

And I'll see you guys soon Friday with another episode.