IT'S JUST PHAT BABY! With Dominique Toney & Ria GIbson

Speaker 1 My guests today, Dominique Toney and Rhea Gibson, are two

Speaker 1 adorable, super intelligent, amazing ladies. And they wrote an incredible book and journal called It's Just Fat Baby about their journeys with weight loss, body acceptance, self-love, and self-care.

Speaker 1 And I think this is such an important subject that pretty much all of us on this planet can relate at one point or another in our lives.

Speaker 1 I'm sure we have looked at ourselves in the mirror and thought, oh my god, I don't like what I see.

Speaker 2 Should I lose weight?

Speaker 1 What should I do about it? And they are so raw and so real about their journey and how they got to the point where they're at today.

Speaker 1 I absolutely fell in love with their work and it was such an honor and pleasure having them on the show.

Speaker 1 And I highly recommend the book because like I said, not only they talk about their own personal journeys but it's an adorable journey journal it's an exercise that you can actually actually do yourself of self-reflection self-love and self-care which is obviously something that i always love i hope you guys really enjoyed this episode it's just fat baby because at the end of the day it's all about self-love

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Speaker 2 Dominic and Ria, welcome so much to Carondales. It's such a pleasure to have you girls here.

Speaker 3 Yes, thank you.

Speaker 2 It is such an honor to be here with you had no idea oh my god it's an honor to have you because let me tell you i love your book congratulations thank you your girls did really really well that's an amazing book

Speaker 3 we appreciate it truly thank you so much yeah we have you know it was such a learning process for us and we just you know said

Speaker 3 Let's just put our thoughts on the paper and just go with it.

Speaker 2 Yeah, so that's the first question. How did you decide? Because it's a very personal book, which I loved.
I know it's so hard, and we're going to talk about it.

Speaker 2 I know it's so hard for all of us girls, right? To talk about our weight, weight journey, how it affects our lives. And I think it's such an important conversation.
But you girls got really personal.

Speaker 2 Like you talk about your relationships, you talk about your weight journey. And then I love that you do this little journal thing, which I'm huge about journaling.
I love writing.

Speaker 2 And you put these questions that we can actually reflect on it. But how did you come up with that idea?

Speaker 3 I have to give credit to Dominique because Dominique is really big on journaling. So she is the mastermind behind putting the journal inside of the book.
So credit to Dominique on that one for sure.

Speaker 3 And I just went with it. Like, you know, she never steered us wrong with any idea that she had.
So I just kind of go with the flow. Like, you know what? Okay, we can do it.
Why not?

Speaker 3 So

Speaker 3 I felt like, you know, when she presented that idea of putting a journal inside it was more so making sure people had that reflective piece as they read along with us and we put that reflection inside after a story that they kind of sat back and thought about their own lives after they you know read a particular portion of our life with us and then they kind of had the opportunity to say well you know where was i at at that particular moment in my life and how did something make me feel during that time you know totally and it's interesting because as i started reading the book and i saw the journal part part, which same Dominique, I love writing.

Speaker 2 I've been journaling forever. It helps me get back in my life and remember like the tough times and how much I changed and evolved.

Speaker 2 I'm a huge fan of writing, like literally writing on pen and paper, you know? I don't care about technology. If you guys look at my desk, any given day I have 10 million pieces of pen and paper.

Speaker 2 And I love that that you tell a story and that you're like, have you ever been through this? Have you ever been through that?

Speaker 2 And at the end of the day, this is what I was thinking today before the podcast, because you girls on the East Coast, you had a completely different upbringing than me.

Speaker 2 And I thought, at the end of the day, we all go through a lot of the same shit.

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 3 Absolutely.

Speaker 2 We all like think about it. We're very critical about our bodies.

Speaker 2 We all have ups and downs. We all feel good or bad about our weight, about how we relate to other people.
Doesn't matter where you are in the world, we're only human at the end of the day, right?

Speaker 3 That's true. Yes, absolutely.

Speaker 2 And you girls get really raw and real in the book. So tell me how did you decide to

Speaker 2 write about it? Because it's not easy to put yourselves out there, you know?

Speaker 3 Well, we've been friends for a really long time,

Speaker 3 a really long time since high school. And we're not super old, but you know, we're a little up there.

Speaker 3 So

Speaker 3 we were having a conversation like we always do and started talking about how it was really hard to be overweight kid.

Speaker 3 And we always hoped that we would grow out of it, grow out of our baby fat. And we never did.
We just got bigger.

Speaker 3 The conversation just kept going. We said, you know, what if we really shared these stories with somebody?

Speaker 3 What if we really shared with people how we heal, how we had horrible friendships, horrible relationships, and, you know, what we could do to really help somebody else to not have to go through what we went through.

Speaker 3 And so that's when we decided, let's heal, let's be transparent, and let's really share our story like we never done before.

Speaker 2 I love that because same, I do the same with the podcast. I'm very open and and raw because I think this is how we learn together and we heal and we figure out how to move forward.

Speaker 2 And I think weight is a very delicate subject.

Speaker 2 No matter, like I said, no matter where we are in the world, no matter who we are, I think you can ask any woman in the world, even if you ask a supermodel.

Speaker 2 Doesn't matter how perfect they are, they don't feel great every single day. And you said, we grew up chubby and we grew up fat and we grew up overweight and

Speaker 2 you were, you were like super bullied as a kid and then you didn't grow out of it. Some kids grow up maybe super skinny or super tall and they get bullied as well.

Speaker 2 Nowadays, I think, because when I grew up, I'm sure I'm older than you guys, but when I grew up, we didn't have even social media. Nowadays, I cannot imagine being a kid with social media, right?

Speaker 3 I think the same thing all the time. I'm like, I can't imagine you know being that age like middle school high school and having the pressures of social media flood my mind 24 7.

Speaker 3 i'm so thankful i did grow up in that age that i that era that i grew up in because i just felt like we were able to kind of slow down and grow up like in the reasonable amount of time that we were able to

Speaker 3 because i think kids probably now today they feel so pressured to grow up much faster yeah because of social media all this you know constant incoming you know waves of technology and pressure of people telling them like this is what you should look like this is what you should strive to achieve and this is you know just constantly coming in and it's just like you know they don't know what they should be or how they should be and they don't even have the time to really identify you know

Speaker 2 being themselves yeah the problem is nowadays uh bullying comes not only like with the kids in school bully bullying comes on social media by total strangers right people that don't even know us they look at your account and they call you all kinds of names and they assume shit about you that without even knowing.

Speaker 2 I kind of just laugh it off, but I'm sure for teenagers, younger people, it must be like super tough. And you actually put a quote in your book.

Speaker 2 I wrote it down here because it's one of the nicest quotes. And you, girls, by the way, congratulations, because you did a ton of research to find some incredible quotes

Speaker 2 that you put throughout the book.

Speaker 2 But this is one of my favorites that i'm never going to forget so i wrote it down here about bullying um bullying is not a reflection of the victim's character but a but rather a sign of the bully's lack of character

Speaker 2 i love that

Speaker 3 yeah it's so true

Speaker 3 yeah you know it's so true hurt people hurt people yeah i love that

Speaker 3 And it's so true. I just, I really went through bullying like in my early stages of childhood and it kind of like tapered off once i got to like fifth sixth grade but i felt it so hard you know

Speaker 3 preschool you know first through or yeah preschool through maybe third grade it just hit so hard for me and i just will never forget how i felt in those moments and i just you know tried to not be that person to make somebody feel bad because I was in those, you know, shoes at one point in time.

Speaker 2 It stays with you, right? If somebody calls you whatever, fat, fat saw, fat so,

Speaker 2 yeah, shubby, whatever it is, you know, it sticks with you for a really long time.

Speaker 3 It does for the rest of your life, you know? Yeah. Even if you lose weight, gain weight, whatever, it stays.

Speaker 3 That whole thing. where it says sticks and stones may break your bones, but words don't hurt.
They do hurt.

Speaker 2 Of course they do.

Speaker 3 You know, they create those lasting scars.

Speaker 2 Yeah. The part that, you know, when I was reading the book, by the way, the cover is so adorable, guys.

Speaker 2 It's like a scale and a little cupcake on top of the scale.

Speaker 2 I love it. But we're going to talk about the cover, how you guys came up with the name.
But what I was thinking today that,

Speaker 2 and I want your opinion,

Speaker 2 I, as a woman, And I was never overweight, but of course I have my ups and downs. And I had the opposite of the spectrum.
When my mom died a few years ago in 2017,

Speaker 2 I lost a ton of weight because my mom died, and a year later, my husband died. So I went through severe trauma in my life.

Speaker 2 And I'm thin,

Speaker 2 thin, yeah, I'm like 117 pounds, but I lost so much weight. I was like 112 pounds.

Speaker 1 I was 111, 112 pounds.

Speaker 2 And I remember at the time, I was hiding my pain, you know, working and doing all the things that I had to do. And people looked at me and they're like, oh, you look so great.
You look so great.

Speaker 2 You look so great. And I never had been more unhealthy.
I couldn't eat. I was so weak.
I thought I was going to die.

Speaker 2 You know, I ended up in the hospital with a kidney infection because I couldn't eat. And I remember just because I was thin, you know, because that's what society expects, I guess, of you.

Speaker 2 And I remember when I used to go home and cry because I literally couldn't eat because I was in so much mental pain.

Speaker 2 And after that, as I started recovering, you know, nowadays I feel like, okay, I never want to go that low. I'm happy with the way I am.

Speaker 2 But I always ask, I always question myself, why do we feel as women that we have to

Speaker 2 talk about it? You know what I mean? Like, oh, I'm too thin or I'm too fat or I'm this or I'm that. I feel like we always have to justify our weight.

Speaker 2 I don't feel men have to do that too much. I think it's always on us.
Do you guys feel that pressure? Do you agree with me?

Speaker 3 I do. I feel like men probably have different pressures, like

Speaker 3 career status. They probably have different pressures of financial status.

Speaker 3 Theirs is more maybe financial or career-based. Women, I feel like, is just more appearance-based.

Speaker 3 But I feel like also now too, you know, times have changed where women have, you know, just this equal amount of pressure, not only to, you know, look good, but, you know, if you're career-driven, you know, you have the pressure of, you know, your career.

Speaker 3 You have the pressure of appearance. You have the pressure of, you know,

Speaker 3 if you're married or not, you know, do you have a family or not? We have so much more pressure on us. just because times have changed and i feel like it just makes it makes it worse

Speaker 2 Yeah, I just think we get criticized, you know,

Speaker 2 personally, it drives me crazy

Speaker 2 when I hear somebody criticizing a woman's body. I don't care who they are because I think we can be beautiful on any size, honestly, honestly, honestly.

Speaker 2 I don't think it's one size fits all, you know?

Speaker 2 I don't think that there is such a thing.

Speaker 2 But when I hear even women criticizing other women or a guy saying, oh my God, you know, she's fat or she's too thin or she doesn't have a butt or she has a butt, it drives me crazy out of my mind.

Speaker 2 I don't think we should even have this conversation, you know, about women's bodies.

Speaker 3 That's true, but it's the way that you've been programmed, you know, ever since if you go back and you think about Barbie and how Barbie looked and she was perfect.

Speaker 3 You know, it's that same thing. I think every woman is just striving her own sense to be that perfect, whether it's a Coke bottle, whether it's Barbie, whatever it is, to be that perfect woman and to

Speaker 3 have some type of accolades that she receives because of it. You know? Yeah.

Speaker 2 How do you get to the point that, because you guys, I mean, okay, let's, let's wait, wait, because you wrote, it's a very rich book, by the way, because you talk about your journey growing up.

Speaker 2 You talk about a lot of relationships. Same, we've all been there, right?

Speaker 2 Hooking up with the wrong man, going back to the wrong man. Same thing as I was reading the book, I'm like, been there, done that,

Speaker 2 hence the podcast.

Speaker 2 We've all been, you can talk to girls all over the world. We all have similar stories.
And then there's also, I don't know if you girls do that, but the emotional eating, right?

Speaker 2 Right. Like when I'm too sad, I do do like 90% of the time I eat super healthy, super clean.
It's just my lifestyle because it makes me feel good.

Speaker 2 And then if something bad happens to me, I'm the person that I'll go like, I'll cry with the food, you know, I'll go and buy something that I love and I do the emotional eating.

Speaker 2 Right. And you got, you, you girls wrote about that as well.

Speaker 3 So I know for me, there was a point of time where there were certain items that I would not even buy. Like I would not buy ice cream.

Speaker 3 I would not buy certain brands of chips because I know once I get started, I wouldn't know how to stop. I couldn't control myself.

Speaker 3 So I know for me, there are just certain things that I won't even buy. I mean, now it's a little bit different just because I had weight loss surgery back in 2021.

Speaker 3 And I'm very, just very routine and I have a very strict regimen for myself. You know, if I overindulge now, it's because I ate literally maybe eight, 12 nacho cheese Doritos, and that's it.

Speaker 3 That's like my splurge for like the week.

Speaker 3 But, you know, back then, I just could not keep certain things in the house because I did not know how to just have like, you know, the serving size on the container.

Speaker 3 I would go ham and that would be it.

Speaker 3 So I could definitely relate to the emotional e.

Speaker 3 And then I feel like too in our society, food is centered around like celebrations. You know, we, you know, have a graduation party.
There's lots of food. Baby shower, we celebrate with food.

Speaker 3 It's a wedding, we celebrate with food.

Speaker 3 If somebody, you know, it's having a bridal shower, we celebrate with food.

Speaker 3 You know, some type of sporting event. Somebody's having a party.
We celebrate with food. Like food is the center of everything that we do, whether it's something positive or negative.

Speaker 3 Like food is the center of it all, you know?

Speaker 2 Yeah, for sure. And I want to talk about your

Speaker 2 surgery because you were very open about that in the book. You said that,

Speaker 2 and I know a lot of people have questions about it, but it's interesting because you said you tried everything, right?

Speaker 2 You tried your dieting in your weight loss journey. You tried all kinds of fat diets.
You tried a bunch of things before you got to the point that you're like, I'm going to do the gastric bypass.

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Speaker 3 yes i have the um the bsg surgery which is the gastric sleeve but this my struggle with weight like was literally from birth okay I was heavy as a preschooler all the way up until I had my gastric sleeve surgery.

Speaker 3 And it wasn't that, you know, I was a stranger to the gym. It just felt like for me, the older I got, the harder it was for the weight to come off.
And I would sign up for people's boot camps.

Speaker 3 I was no stranger to, you know, going to some of the well-known boot camps in our city,

Speaker 3 personal trainers. And the last stop that I made was my personal trainer when I lived in Virginia Beach.
And it was nothing.

Speaker 3 He did absolutely nothing wrong. He was an amazing trainer.
The problem was after a while, when your body is constantly going through this battle of are we losing weight? Are we gaining weight?

Speaker 3 Are we, you know, on a diet? We're not on a diet, it doesn't know what it wants to do anymore. So, you know, you just kind of, you know, stay at this, you know, space of holding on to weight.

Speaker 3 And for me, I just got tired. I just got tired of fighting that battle with myself.
And I just felt like, you know what, let me go talk to a doctor. I'm going to use this as a tool.

Speaker 3 And I knew a few people in my personal life who had had the surgery. They had been successful.
So, you know, I just made that decision that was best for me. And so far, it's, it's been working.
So.

Speaker 2 So it's been a few years and now you feel like you're happy. You got used to the lifestyle.

Speaker 3 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 3 It's,

Speaker 3 I feel like it was the best decision I could have ever made for myself.

Speaker 3 You know, not everybody, you know, has the best outcome, but I feel like it's a mental.

Speaker 3 It's definitely a mental change that you have to make.

Speaker 3 And if you're not mentally prepared to make all of the life adjustments, you may not be as successful as you would want to be because it's not a quick fix.

Speaker 3 You have to be constantly working at it every single day. You can't go lay on a surgery table.
They can't do what they have to do.

Speaker 3 And then you're not going to come out in two days losing X amount of weight. You have to constantly work at it every day.
You have to stick to the portion sizes. You have to go to the gym.

Speaker 3 You have to take those vitamins. And it's something you do 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

Speaker 2 And you said you have actually to go through a lot of tests, right? Like psychological tests, because they want to make sure that you are the right candidate for it.

Speaker 2 Probably because, like you said, they want to make sure that it's not just a person that thinks, oh yeah, this is going to be a quick fix and it's going to solve all my problems.

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Speaker 2 They want to make sure that you know what you're getting into.

Speaker 3 Yeah, absolutely. You talk to a psychiatrist, you go see a nutritionist for a few months.

Speaker 3 More than likely, the doctor is going to ask you to lose, you know, a certain amount of weight on your own before before you go see the,

Speaker 3 before you finally have your surgery date. I mean, it's a lot of steps that you have to take.
You know, it's usually about a six-month process.

Speaker 3 Yeah, usually a six to eight month process, depending on like your insurance coverage. But

Speaker 3 I just, you know, I had no complaint.

Speaker 2 Well, it worked for you. So yeah, it could be an option for somebody that tried everything else and nothing else worked, right?

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Speaker 2 But you girls talk about something else that I completely agree, and I probably think it's on top of the pyramid: self-love.

Speaker 2 I think

Speaker 2 at any size, anything that you do is only gonna work if you decide whatever you're gonna do it's because you love yourself that part yes

Speaker 2 so to me this was one of the most important parts of the book do you girls want to talk about that for a second

Speaker 3 um yes i think that when we were discussing just even writing the book we had to figure out do we love ourselves And the book was truly a healing process.

Speaker 3 It was us being as transparent and open as we've ever been. And a lot of the stories we've told, our families didn't even know.

Speaker 3 You know, they didn't know about, like, for instance, me being teased as a child or some of the things that I experienced. So

Speaker 3 writing the book, we had to really reflect and really say, no matter what happens, no matter what we look like, no matter. you know, what we look like down the road, we love ourselves.

Speaker 3 Regardless of how others have treated us, we love ourselves. And now, because we know our worth, we know we're no longer willing to accept, no longer willing to compromise.

Speaker 3 So, that's the message that we really want to share with women, men, whoever.

Speaker 3 You have to love yourself first. You can't expect for another person to complete you or to make you vote.
You have to be vulnerable. You have to like you by yourself and with another person.

Speaker 3 And when you do that, people will treat you better because you demand a different level of respect. You know, you know that you're not leftovers yeah

Speaker 2 you know that you belong at the table and you have a seat and you know that a person would be lucky to have you yeah so that's really our message i love love love that because i think that's the best antidote even against bullying because No matter what people say about you, if you know your value, regardless of your size, regardless of what you look like, nothing is going to affect you.

Speaker 2 And I think that's the most important. And for me, it took me decades to get to this point.

Speaker 2 I wasn't bullied technically about my weight, but believe it or not, I was, and to this day, I'm bullied because, you know, I'm Latin, but I don't look Latin, right?

Speaker 2 Because I'm half Latin and half European.

Speaker 2 And people don't believe me. when I tell them that I'm Latin.
And then because I still have an accent,

Speaker 2 the accent,

Speaker 2 I still have an accent. Although I've lived in the United States like pretty much my entire life, no, people don't believe me.
I'm like, yes, I'm an American, but I never lost my accent.

Speaker 2 So they bully me because of that. They make fun of me because of that.
But for so long, used to bother me. You know, I always felt like inferior and I was embarrassed.

Speaker 2 Nowadays, like this journey of knowing my value and my worst and what I'm capable of, when people make fun of me, I just laugh it off.

Speaker 2 I'm like, nothing affects me anymore at this point in my life, you know? But it's a journey to get here, to accept yourself this much. It's not like an overnight thing, right?

Speaker 2 No, it's not.

Speaker 3 Not at all.

Speaker 3 And I think once you realize that everybody gets bullied, everyone gets made fun of, people will find the smallest state or anything that they see as different or they see as a threat, and they will make fun of you.

Speaker 3 A lot of times people who bully you want to be you. You know, people are jealous of what they feel like you possess, even though you don't feel like you're that great.

Speaker 3 So I think that's the key is to recognize, again, your own worth and know, hey, if you dislike me this much, that means I'm doing something right. Michael Jordan said that.

Speaker 2 As sad as it is, right, because I agree with you.

Speaker 2 I think usually the people that like even like the people the the the trolls on social media usually they're the jealous ones right the ones that are not doing what we are doing they're jealous of our work but it makes me sad because i kind of want to live in a world where we are so supportive of each other

Speaker 2 that we make each other stronger

Speaker 2 That's the world I want to live in.

Speaker 3 We should be like that, but I think we have to create the culture to be that.

Speaker 2 Yes,

Speaker 3 leading by example and showing people you don't have to beat someone else down. We can all win.
We can all do well together, love each other, and protect each other, especially as women.

Speaker 3 You know, Kat, that is exactly how I got turned on to your podcast because I was actually... I think I had just kind of listened to Dr.
Cheyenne Bryan and her episode with Cam Newton.

Speaker 3 So I was just kind of, you know, doing a search for on my iPad or iTunes podcast for dr cheyenne bryant episodes and i was like oh she's on the body image one with you and your friend cat at the time and so once i heard that episode with her and you all i was like oh well let's see what cat on the loose is about and i just like started listening to all these different episodes and i just found that particular episode about like body image and self-esteem to be so you know very valuable and so true and i hope you know people can go back and listen to that episode that you all talked about because everything was so spot on.

Speaker 3 Especially that point you all made about, you know, people compare themselves to the Kardashians. That is an unrealistic expectation.

Speaker 2 Oh my God, yes.

Speaker 3 That is such an unrealistic expectation to me.

Speaker 3 You know,

Speaker 3 it's just, people just have to learn how to love who they are, deal with, you have to work with what you have. And if you want to be better for you, that's the key.

Speaker 3 If you want to make self-improvements for you, that's fine. You are more than welcome to do that.

Speaker 3 You can do your research and find what avenues you can afford that are the safest way for you to do that.

Speaker 3 But once you start trying to make self-improvements to impress other people, you have a problem. Absolutely.
And that is something that

Speaker 3 you can support for somebody. Yeah.
Temporary happiness. It's temporary happiness because it's just, it's just not the way to do it.

Speaker 3 everybody. You're never going to please anybody.
You're going to be, you're going to live a miserable life trying to spend your life pleasing other people.

Speaker 2 oh my god no you nailed it and but that's the thing with social media i especially the younger people but but nowadays even like i see girls in their 30s and 40s like you said they look at these celebrities with millions of dollars and they want to look like the celebrities but you start losing your individuality like you just said instead of i i believe in being the best version of ourselves like when i wake up in the morning i'm like okay i can only be the best best Catherine, you know?

Speaker 2 My body's never going to be perfect.

Speaker 2 Nothing is ever going to be exactly the way I want. I'm never going to be tall or whatever, but I try to be the best version of me for me.

Speaker 2 But there are so many women, like you just said, instead of being themselves, they try to copy and copy and copy. I think they lose their own identity.
And that's where the problem starts.

Speaker 2 And it's a rat race, right? Because there is never going to be like, why would you want to be like another Kardashian or another Khloe or whatever their names are?

Speaker 2 Like, you know, what's the point in that? Like you said, you're never going to be happy like that. You're always going to be frustrated, you know?

Speaker 3 It's they're going to keep making changes for the next day.

Speaker 3 Yeah. You're going to have to keep changing yourself.
And if you've even watched, you know, keeping up with the Kardashians, they have their own insecurities too.

Speaker 2 Oh my God, everybody does.

Speaker 3 Of all of us. Yeah.

Speaker 2 You know, look, listen, I've talked to models.

Speaker 2 I'm gonna be doing an episode with models coming up because of the beauty industry. And

Speaker 2 same,

Speaker 2 we think that they're this perfect goddesses, but you know, they're women just like us. Some days, of course, they feel incredible.
Maybe they photograph super well,

Speaker 2 but you know, there are other things that they don't love about themselves. And there are things that they love.
They're parts, right? There are parts that we love and parts we don't love.

Speaker 2 But I think it's about loving, you know, the

Speaker 2 whole. It's like learning how to, I really believe, and it sounds cheesy, but I think this journey of self-love is the biggest lesson that we can all learn.
You know, if you learn, if you get there,

Speaker 2 I'm not kidding you. It took me my whole life to get here.
I literally just learned it like the past two years.

Speaker 3 A thing, Cat.

Speaker 3 I can identify with that.

Speaker 2 Yeah, and you girls are amazing. And I feel like this book was so raw.
So it was right up my alley when I read it. I talked to my team and I'm like, these girls are so real.

Speaker 2 And they put so much of themselves in this book. I want to talk to them because I know it's not easy.
I, because I do it on the podcast, like I talk about my life and my journey and my problems.

Speaker 2 And I know it's not easy to open up, but

Speaker 2 it's very cathartic, right? Once you open up, you're like, wow, okay.

Speaker 2 I feel like I took like pounds and pounds of weight off of my back once you put it out there, right?

Speaker 3 Absolutely. And it's there now.
So

Speaker 3 don't say that.

Speaker 3 It's out there. And that was, I think, another fear once we published.
It was like, oh, my God.

Speaker 3 It's out there.

Speaker 3 And, but at the end of the day, our story, it is healing and we want to help someone else and we know that it's so many people who can identify like you said no matter what your walk of life is no matter what your experiences are you can identify with either the both of us or one of us or at least parts of our story you know so absolutely Yeah, because you talk about, like I said, you talk a lot about like different men and different relationships and ups and downs.

Speaker 2 We've all been there. Then I think another thing that every single woman has done, even the skinniest, like we were saying, even the supermodels, is the yo-yo diets, the crazy shit,

Speaker 2 no carb, no this, no that. Like, and of course, nothing works because nobody wants to be miserable forever.

Speaker 3 It's not sustainable.

Speaker 2 Yeah, it's not sustainable. I think only a lifestyle that you enjoy and works for you is sustainable, at least in my book.
I'm a firm believer of that.

Speaker 2 But

Speaker 2 when you read the book and

Speaker 2 you guys listening to the podcast, I'm, you know, 1 million percent, please get this book because it's so much fun.

Speaker 2 And then when you open the, at the end of the chapters, when you get your little journal, every single question you girls ask,

Speaker 2 everybody's going to say, yes, I've been there. Have you ever been through a breakup? Yes.

Speaker 2 Have you, has someone ever dated wish you would have not have dated? Yes.

Speaker 2 Like, so everybody relates. Have you conquered one of your biggest fears? Yeah.
So like, it's so relatable. It's so relatable because we've all been through this journey, you know?

Speaker 2 So it's, it's a fun read and it's an exercise in self-love and self-care. So it's really, really amazing.

Speaker 3 Thank you so much. We really appreciate that.
We absolutely do. And you know, we do promote um now people can purchase the book online, but listen,

Speaker 3 don't nobody know who we are from a can of paint. Okay, let's just be real.
We are Dominique Garrea from Cleveland, Ohio. We are nurse and social worker by day.
Okay, that's what we do.

Speaker 3 That's our gear.

Speaker 3 But when people want to buy an actual hard copy book from us, they are going to get an inspirational bookmark and we will send them an ink pen because Why are we going to create a book with a built-in journal and not give you a pen?

Speaker 2 I got the most beautiful package. Yes, you guys sent me an inspirational note, which is right here behind me, like on my mood board.
I don't know if you can see it on camera.

Speaker 2 You send a pen, you send a beautiful t-shirt, which I love. I was like in tears because I'm very emotional.

Speaker 3 Thank you.

Speaker 2 You girls wrote the sweetest message in the book. And I think it's all about women, empowering women.

Speaker 2 I was talking about, you know, before I started the the podcast, many years ago, I started an online clothing brand called Girly A La Mode.

Speaker 2 It's exclusively to empower women to feel good about themselves. Like every single little piece, it's like cozy sweatshirts and hoodies and t-shirts and things that fit every person on the planet.

Speaker 2 It's like everything we create, it's for, and the motto is: everybody is beautiful.

Speaker 3 Oh, I love it.

Speaker 2 Every product we create, we make a point.

Speaker 2 Like, is this gonna look good on any person that tries it on? You know, I don't care how big you are, how tiny you are, how tall.

Speaker 2 I want every person that puts that on, say, okay, this is cozy, this is adorable. You know, so that's why

Speaker 2 exactly, because I've been such a huge advocate for body positivity for so long.

Speaker 2 So, I believe the universe united us to spread the word.

Speaker 3 I love that, Kay. Yes, that's what we are all about.
We just want people to understand that we have been in, you know, the same shoes they may be in.

Speaker 3 We have, you know, different stories, but our struggles with weight have connected us. We are Cancerian besties.
I'm June. She's July.
We are the same, but different.

Speaker 3 But, you know, we are, you know, just here for people to understand that, They, listen, if you feel like you're going through a tough time, tough times don't last long. That's true.

Speaker 3 You can, you know, get up, give life the middle finger and let anybody who doubted you know, I'm coming back harder and stronger. So don't think you're going to keep me down.

Speaker 2 Yes, baby. I love it.

Speaker 3 At the end of the day, people need to choose themselves. Always bet on you and choose you.

Speaker 2 1 million percent because once you start doing that, the universe chooses you. Like you said, Dominique, a little while back, people appreciate you, people respect you and treat you better.

Speaker 2 So I think everything starts with us, regardless of our size.

Speaker 3 Absolutely.

Speaker 2 That's the message.

Speaker 3 You know, economic status, any of those things.

Speaker 3 Be happy with who you are.

Speaker 2 Yes. And I'm going to say, Ria, yes, I know you're a social worker and fabulous nurse from Cleveland, Ohio, but you're also fabulous writers.

Speaker 2 You are professional book writers. You kicked ass.

Speaker 3 Thank you, Kat.

Speaker 2 You really did. And it's an honor, honor, honor that you know you found me, that you sent me your gorgeous book and your care pack because I felt very loved.
Thank you with all my heart.

Speaker 2 Congratulations. Can you please tell people how they got this book?

Speaker 3 Yes. So they can actually, if they they go to our website, www.itchjustfetbaby.com, we have a link at the very top.
They can get it through Amazon, Walmart, BarnesNoble.com.

Speaker 3 But if they want us to send them a hard copy of the book, where we will mail them the ink pen and the bookmark. She will.
I will. Don't explain.
I'll be going to UTS the next day.

Speaker 3 Stop playing game. We accept them,

Speaker 3 cash in, Venpo, every every form you'll pay and you can dm us and just let us know and ria a hundred percent will send you that book yes everything absolutely so you can send us a dm because our instagram is atv underscore ria nique is that our i get to be we have so many things

Speaker 2 i'll tell you what i'm putting the link i'm putting the link on this episode so everybody can find you so the link is going to be there so people can click and go and find you.

Speaker 2 And everything is going to be there. You guys can DM me.
If you don't find, I'll hook you up because I, this is like,

Speaker 2 I'm not kidding. I read the gazillion books this year.
This is like one of the top, top, top, top, top favorite on my list. Madeline Love.
It's just fat. By the way, fat, P H A T is just fat.

Speaker 2 Right? I love it. And the cover is before I let you go, how'd you guys guys came up with this adorable cover? The scale, the cupcake?

Speaker 3 So we worked with

Speaker 3 our accomplisher and we kind of went through ideas. And I'm not sure who really said, well, what about, I think Maria might have said, what about a cupcake or a cake?

Speaker 3 And then he might have said, all right, what about a scale when he brought in his graphic designer? Yeah, we kind of just, you know, because the idea was like, it's just fat, baby.

Speaker 3 You know, we're talking about our challenges with weight, but you know, we're cute. You know, we're going to make it cute.
Yeah, we wanted to just kind of draw in attention.

Speaker 3 And it's like, you know, I like the digital scale because I think at first he had like that, you know, traditional

Speaker 3 old school

Speaker 3 balancing scale. And then we chose fuchsia because we just love the color.
We want people to see it and want it to pop. and draw in people.
So I think we are colorful and we are. Yes, I love side dye.

Speaker 2 oh my god yeah same i freaking love it you girls did an absolutely incredible job congratulations and by the way you're both really beautiful

Speaker 2 thank you thank you for sharing your weight journey i hope you're happy i think at the end of the day it's all about being healthy right yeah absolutely we if we have our health we have everything

Speaker 2 if we're not healthy game over that's what i tell women everywhere When I was my skinniest, like I told you, I almost died.

Speaker 2 So nowadays I'm like, fuck, I don't want to be that skinny. Pardon my French.
I'm like, I don't want to go that thin anymore because when I go that thin, I know like I'm not well. I prefer to feel,

Speaker 2 I prefer to have a little meat on my bones and know that I'm super healthy. So I think that we got to find the medium like to be healthy and move and live and thrive.

Speaker 2 So, and you girls are beautiful and you're intelligent and you're creative. And congratulations.

Speaker 3 Thank you, Ken. And I'm going to continue to tune in.

Speaker 2 Oh, thank you so much. Yes, Kat on the Los Angeles.

Speaker 2 Dominic,

Speaker 2 Dominic, Tony, and Rhea Gibson. It was such an honor having you.
Have a wonderful weekend. It's just fat.
And I'll hook you up. I'll put the links here.
And you guys, be safe out there.

Speaker 2 Thank you, guys.

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