"Huge Fornicators" (w/ Cate Blanchett)

March 19, 2025 1h 37m Explicit

Turns out that we, too, can command the winds, sir! Because CATE BLANCHETT, star of the new film Black Bag and (duh) countless other incredible films is here on Las Cultch for a very fun conversation! But first, a culture catch-up! Matt and Bowen run through their experiences at the Oscars, its after parties, and Gaga's episodes of SNL and LAS CULTURISTAS (which we still cannot believe). Then, the true GOAT of acting sits with our hosts to talk about what wearing white sneakers may mean for your sex life, Barbie and doll culture, Sydney's embrace of gay culture, and experiences at Berghain. Also, Cate weighs in on whether there are too many televised award shows, discusses her fascination with ribbon dancing and rhythmic gymnastics, and unpacks her lack of an acting process. And you KNOW that Tár is thoroughly discussed! All this, the word "buddy", the phrase "hakuna matata" and the nightmare of a toilet seat left up. You wanna fuck me, Barbara?!?! If not, it's fine! We hope you enjoy this episode anyway :) Black Bag is in theaters now!

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Move and be moved. Look, Matt.
Oh, I see. Wow.
Oh, look over there. Is that culture? Yes.
Las Culturistas. Ding dong.
Las Culturistas calling. Just for a warning, you're going to hear that twice.
We're going to ding dong again because we are not currently with our guest of this episode, which you can probably see now based on the title, is with the one and only Cate Blanchett. Cate Blanchett.
Got a new movie, Black Bag. It's great.
It's great. I was actually like, I was watching Black Bag and then I was going to choose another thing from her filmography to watch again before this.
There's so much. I got overwhelmed.
You got antsy. I got antsy.
When you're at the bookstore. Yeah.
So many options. Not even just little options where it's like, oh, it could be that, could be that.
Big, delicious options. It's like a cheesecake factory, her filmography.
It's a menu with a spiral spine. This is a rule of culture if I've ever heard one.
This is a rule of culture number 94?

Yeah, 94.

Kate Blanchett's filmography

is like the menu

at a cheesecake factory.

The options.

What were you,

were you juggling?

Did you like whittle it down

to a final selection?

I mean, there's always tar.

Yep.

There's always tar,

but the thing about tar is

it is the,

let's just call it

the big steak of options

because it's so,

it's long.

It's a big old film.

Hey, you're gonna get it's the most bang for your buck Cate Blanchett you're gonna get yes but having already seen that several times right and then I thought why don't we do Carol and I thought I was like this could be good but I've also seen that a couple times and then I thought notes on a scandal which is ultimately what I went with because I know that's what you went with. That's what I went with.
This is my favorite film in her filmography. We'll tell her.
Notes on a Scandal? I think it is. Just because I love melodrama.
We are off track. So the reason why we're doing this is because we want to give you a little bit of a culture catch-up.
We know that people have been sort of desiring this. Because a lot has happened in the last month.
Where do we start in our lives and of course in the grand scheme of things but um we just thought we'd give you like a little sort of hybrid episode and um I feel like someone like Cate Blanchett deserves a sort of like little preamble because it's just gonna be a lot yeah I also thought, I'm like, what if Cate Blanchett came in here and we did like a traditional intro and Cate Blanchett, the legendary Cate Blanchett, was just sitting here? So we'll probably do like a 30-second intro for her and just get into it because I actually can't bear the thought of her sitting here. Listening to us.
While we're like, so what the thing about like, my favorite soup is, or whatever dumb shit we would say. What's your favorite soup? New England clam.
Thank you for asking. I always just wanted to say New England clam, but it's hard to pick a favorite soup.
It's so hard. I don't think so, honey, having to pick a favorite soup.
And it feels like the pressure is always on to choose a favorite soup nowadays. Well, I feel like that's a self-invented pressure because you just brought that up as like an example.
You don't feel that pressure day in and day out. Ever since Hale and Hardy has disappeared from New York City, I know I'm no longer making the decision of what soup do I want today.
It is nosedived and it makes me sick because it used to be like the only thing that gave me joy was to like pick a new soup. And now I just don't encounter soup as much as I would like.
Excuse me. First of all, let me tell you something.
Hale and Hardy, that was a great American institution. And I'm so disappointed in all the consumers of America and everyone that eats food out there.
What you did, what you allowed to happen to Halen Hardy is unacceptable because where else are you going to get, I'm sorry, 12, 13, sometimes 14 options of soup. When you see Moroccan lentil on a menu.
Add to cart. Add to cart because you're lucky to have that opportunity.
And now. Unbelievable.
I'm sorry. There have been rumors for, I want to say decades now.
Sick of rumors starting. Rumors starting that it's coming back? No, it's not.
No, it's not. Shut up.
I've heard this for years. No, it's 2025.
We don't have optimistic thoughts anymore. Who are you? Who are you? The one that got away and picked up and moved to a different town? You're like, I'm thinking of moving back into New York.
Lose my number. Lose my number.
If that's who you are,

V.I.V. Hail and Hardy coming back.

V.I.V.? You know, V.I.V.

Vis-a-vis.

You don't think that V.I.V. is more fun?

It's very fun.

It's not the French way to say it.

But you can say V.I.V.

You have to understand,

nowadays, Bowen has to be helping me with this

because we're going to Europe.

We're going to Europe.

Very tar-coated.

She would fly back and forth.

Yeah.

A cultured woman with secrets.

Can't wait to ask Cate Blanchett

if she has secrets, too.

We were talking about soup.

We were talking about preamble. Culture catch-up..
Favorite rule is notes on a scandal. Yeah.
Oh, this is what I was going to say. RKPFKs.
Ks. Whatever.
RKPFKs. We're missing a K.
What? RKPFK. Yeah, you're right.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
It's getting unwieldy. I was going to say, hold me to account.

I want to ask her

if she thinks,

well, I guess,

what?

Is there any use to this?

I want to be like,

do you think they would

make notes on a scandal now?

Like you would not be able

to have like Kate Blanchett

make out with a teenager.

Not just make out.

Fuck in a train yard.

Can I tell you something?

She fucks that kid.

Shit.

I mean, and listen,

it's like-

But that's the whole crux

of the film.

That's the scandal. I didn't write it podcast on a scandal oh my god that's the sequel starring us wait who's Kate and who's Judy Dench I'm Judy I love that you really you're Sheba I am I do think what we should do and it will embarrassing, but we should say the iconic line to Kate.

You think this is a love affair?

You wanna fuck me, Barbara?

How come I thought you think this is a love affair?

It was clearly you wanna...

Fuck, you know what?

I have a you wanna fuck me, Barbara t-shirt

that I had made as a rap gift for Game Show,

and it's in LA. I didn't wear it today.
Where's your Lydia Tarr Innocent t-shirt that I had made as a wrap gift for game show.

And I,

I it's in LA.

I didn't wear it.

Where's your Lydia Tarr innocent t-shirt.

Oh my God.

We should have worn that.

It's okay. I'm literally thinking,

can we make it home?

No,

this sucks.

It's okay.

We'll just tell her.

Well,

we'll show her the photo.

We should both have been wearing our Lydia Tarr is innocent t-shirts.

What if she had been like,

you know,

she's not, she's not. She was an awful woman.
She, She drops in. She's like, this is, I don't like this at all.
I don't agree with this. This is our culture catch-up portion of the episode.
Yes. So let's just make the list now.
Let's just make the programming. Okay, Lady Gaga was on Lost Coach.
Bowen sang with Lady Gaga in two sketches and became best friends.

Matt was front row at the Oscars

while I was backstage.

No, Bowen presented at the Oscars.

It's not Matt was front row at the Oscars.

Matt was front row at the Oscars.

No, I have been such a happy accessory

this past month.

You have no idea.

I feel like the most beautiful purse in the world.

Stop it.

No, stop.

I love it.

You, I feel like, I'm your emotional support animal and I'm world. Stop it.
No, stop. I love it.
You,

I feel like I'm your emotional support animal and I'm so happy about it.

But you know,

it's like,

it's,

it's like when a movie star,

it's like when an actress like brings her dog to a red carpet.

Let's say like someone like Demi Moore brings,

oh,

that dog.

I forget the name.

We're going to call him Pip.

Pip.

It's like,

well,

everyone's,

everyone's obsessed with Pip.

You know what I mean?

I mean, you know, what's really happened is we've fulfilled the prophecy. I'm busy.
I'm busy. Phillips, you are Michelle.
I'm busy. The prophecy has been fulfilled.
There's officially a gay Michelle Williams and busy Phillips. No, no, no.
That's I am not Michelle. You are not And that is both like, that would be a disservice to both of them and us.
Excuse me. I'm saying this with all the love in the world for both of those legends.
And I'm saying it with a lot of love for us. But I'm saying like, there's something about, listen, I'm walking on to the red carpet of the Oscars and it's people, everyone being like, Matt Bowen, Matt Bowen.
They are not. In a way that was like, that filled me with such profound joy.
I was like, yes. We slayed the glam bot.
We slayed the glam bot and we're just like. And they're talking about it.
I can't believe I'm here with my best friend at the Oscars and we're like. Putcha.
Putcha, putcha, putcha. Put your hearts up.
And it's really, I still have to journal about SNL 50. I feel like RKPFKAFs, JK, were not totally satisfied with our SNL 50 recap.

No, they weren't.

We're happy to go into more detail with that.

Let's just say top highlights.

Let's start there.

SNL 50.

Top highlights for you.

Waving at Cher backstage.

Yep. Doing the pre-tape with Andy Samberg, which was so much fun.
Yes. Just loving the moments that we shared together with everybody.
It felt like this wonderful family reunion. It felt like we were all sort of giving each other, it was like a Dickensian experience of like everyone was being visited by the ghosts of SNL past, present, future in a way that was actually not terrible.
Like we were all Scrooge and we all were waking up on Christmas morning. Like God bless us, everyone.
And that was the highlight for me. Yeah.
I mean, everyone was obsessed with Matt working the carpet. That was fun.
I will say one of the highlights after it for me was when,

so you've been on it before,

but I made my at Nikki C. Bell debut on TikTok.

We love Nikki.

Obsessed, deeply obsessed.

And I was so, I'm of course watching it,

bed rotting, like watching the TikTok in bed.

Like Nikki is.

Yeah, exactly.

We were very much simpatico there. I was like, I want to lay down too and be lazy looking at my TikTok.
And then I see myself. And he goes, not the right color.
And so then I wasn't following him, so I followed him, which was a mistake on my part. And he sends me a message and he goes, he revealed himself as a reader.
I don't know how he identifies. Oh my God.
But. He's a finalist.
I go, just so you know, it wasn't as bright in person. Great.
And he goes, okay, I get it. Yeah, totally.
But I loved it. Oh my God.
Because it's a celebration to even be on there. Of course.
Love that. He had to press save on a photo of you.
You know what I mean? It didn't look that bright in person. Like, I absolutely loved what I wore.
The blue? Yeah. Oh, so good.
Thank you. It wasn't even like a, it was not like a jewel tone.
It was not even, but it was not. Certainly not.
But it was still. Can you imagine me in a jewel tone at the SNL 50? Absolutely not.
But it was just a deep, sumptuous blue. Yeah.
it was great. By the way, I don't know why.

I pictured me in a jewel tone at SNL 50,

and this was the pose.

Like, wait.

Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

like, like, like, like, like,

like, like, like, like, like, like,

like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

taking your two hands on me and putting, pushing like your hips forward and like this.

Clavicle, no your clavicle first.

And you just hear, you just hear,

Matt, Matt, Matt.

Over here Matt.

And you know what they always say to me, big smile, Matt.

Big smile, big smile.

Chin up, chin up, chin up.

Chin up, chin up, chin up. No doubt.
No doubt. Chin down.
That's too much. Chin down.
Little bit of a smile. Over here.
And they're always over. You know what we should do even when our backs of our outfits are really bad? Over the shoulder.
I love an old, I love that. Like your fucking Gwyneth.
Oh. Anyway.
Like your fucking Gwyneth Oh Anyway SN50 was amazing Oscars Oscars You really did crush that present thing And there was BTS It was back and forth Whether or not that bit was gonna happen Yes And you stuck to your guns I stuck to my guns The producers pitched the idea The producers and the writers Wonderful team They're just like For working the They're like, yeah, whatever. It's like, these people do it.
This is their thing year in, year out. You know what I mean? They know how this all works.
They're at the Dolby. They know where the bathrooms are.
And it was so much fun. I stayed up after SNL, got on a plane, took a little gummy, conked out, woke up, went straight to the Dolby, felt great, did the bit, had lovely stand-ins, saw the rehearsal for the Oz medley with the stand-ins, and I was still gagged.
I was like, it's not even Cynthia and Ari doing it, and I'm still like in tears. You actually just saw that, like stand-ins? It was these stand-ins

who like were slayed.

Yeah.

Who like were not,

I would say like

maybe they're professional

vocalists and singers

but they were just like,

but I even saw the shot

of like Ari in the background.

Yeah.

Oh, that was a great shot.

And it was just like

Miss Thing,

a blonde girl in the back

just kind of like watching

this other woman

on like the Raze platform

and I was like,

this is gonna fucking.

The stand-ins for them

just like seeing the staging

and like.

And me and all of

Conan's background

I don't be with you for like, he goes, the first 40 minutes. Because I'm presenting the fourth award and I have to get into the costume because we are doing that bit.
Like it went back and forth about whether that was going to happen because it was going to be a big costume change for you. It was going to be a big costume change.
And they weren't sure they were going to have the proper rehearsal time with me because I was flying in the day of. Yeah.
So it might not have happened. And so I told Matt, I budgeted 40 minutes.
It was the full first 90 minutes of the show. It was 90.
And literally, I'm with this seat filler the whole time. And she probably 70 minutes in turns to me and goes, where is Bowen? And I go,

I go,

am I not fun or are you not enjoying

being at the Oscars?

She was in great vibe,

but I will say-

Can I say she had to go

to the bathroom?

Probably,

but also I think she was just like,

there was a little bit of like,

I feel bad that Bowen

isn't in his front row seat

at the Oscars.

And I was just like,

I mean,

I hope he comes soon.

I am in,

I'm enjoying you. Yes.
But like, I do want, because I knew you wanted to be out there watching it because you missed obviously Cynthia and Ariana, which was amazing. I missed the Bond.
The Bond tribute. Of Lisa and Doja and Ray.
And Margaret Qualley. And Margaret.
Oh, my God. Margaret.
Yeah. I mean, and it was, I will say, sitting there for 90 minutes and looking to my left and just seeing all those people, I was like...
What the fuck? You know what I was really proud about? I was like, wow, I've really managed my anxiety. Because I was sitting there chewing.
Wow, I'm so proud of you. And I think a year ago, I wouldn't have been like that.
I think I would have been like... But I was like, okay, it's okay.
It's okay. It's okay.
I'm okay. I was channeling Tate.
You were channeling Tate. Tate would be cool as a cucumber in front row with the Oscars.
I think so. She'd be like, this is fun.
Yeah, I think she'd be like, this is cool, man. This is cool, yeah.
Why would that be the impression? Cool, man. But you did finally come out and we got to see the last half of the Oscars together.
It was just as fun. It was great.
I mean, the wins went as expected until, that was a sad moment when Demi lost, but Mikey's so fucking great in that movie. it's like, that's what's, it's not like an out and out snub necessarily, but it is just a thing of like, God, this, there's just something about the expectation being sort of slowly downloaded into you.
Correct. Like as just, as on a human level, like if you are told like over several months that like.
It's yours. It's yours.
It's yours. Something's going to happen to you.
Something great. And it doesn't.
That is very just for lack of a better word, devastated. And with a camera in your face, the moment it doesn't happen, like, like here's what I'll say.
After that, and you know, I love Anora. I think Mikey Madison's incredible.
I actually think it was even better on the second time I watched it. I think that that performance is great, especially when you see how dissimilar she is to that character.
I think she deserved to win. But it's just tough when there's so many of these award shows.
It makes

you feel like, is it a little too much?

I would say, sure.

Absolutely. Right after

another after another, it feels like a job

that can't possibly have

any reward outside of

ultimately if you do win

and only one person can. And if

you happen to make yourself

a fashion moment, which I'll say again, Brad Goreski absolutely crushed it with me all season. I hope she feels good.
I'm sure she feels good. I'm sure she does.
And it makes me go to answer your question. Like, is this too much? Like kill me for saying this.
It makes me go like, well, for a culture awards, I think we should like build out precursors. Oh no.
The culture awards will have 20 made up precursors. No, there's going to be a brunch.
There's going to be, there's going to be a lot of things. A lot of precursors.
Like we're actually going to create many other small awards with guilds that we create. Actually, that's going to be a reader awards, a publisher awards, a Katie awards, a finalist awards, and the Kyle awards.
And you are going to get to sign up for the Guild. This

actually is happening in real time. We've not

discussed this. We've not discussed this, and we don't think

we have the... We're looking at

Producer Becca, we're like, this is

a nightmare in terms of execution.

It's also kind of officially not really

up to us anymore. I don't know

what we can say, what we can't, but it is...

We are nearing the time of

really being able to say something very big and cool.

But like, I don't know if it's now.

We were told it might be around now, but I don't know.

I don't.

Yeah.

Let's for now.

Watch the space.

For now, we're going to pretend we can say anything we want.

Okay.

And we'll be told later if we can't.

That's if we're in breach.

That's actually a great way to approach.

Ask for forgiveness.

Not permission.

Yes.

Ask for forgiveness.

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You know, I'm watching the UK season three traders right now. And there's an Anglican priest on the show.
And her defense of not being able to be a traitor is, I can't lie. I am not able to be deceitful.
I'm not able to do it. I can't be traitorous.
And was she a traitor? Is she a traitor? No, but it's interesting because half the people are like, I mean, she's a priest. She can't do this.

And then other people are like, no.

She can lie. She just has to

confess. Which she will.

Yeah, which she will. But it's unclear

whether or not she feels

that way. Uh-huh.
So just

know that you can't trust priests.

Are there fun Northern accents on

UK Trader Season 3? Yes.

Because I miss Amanda from Season 1.

Iconic Northern accent. So

yeah, there's really good, there's

Thank you. Are there fun northern accents on UK Traders season three? Yes.
Because I miss Amanda from season one, iconic northern accent. So, yeah, there's a really good, there's, do a northern accent.
Um, so. Are you talking about this? Northern? Yeah.
It's like, it's very, um. Scarce? She goes, I really like Alexander.
I really like Alexander. I love being around him.
It's Cheryl Cole. I can't, I can't believe I had to murder of course to murder again I got to murder again in the turret it's like in the turret in the turret the turret is a very scary place to be it's like Liverpool it's like it's that I love it I love it you're right up my street that's famously what Cheryl Cole said to Sher Lloyd.
Oh, when Sheryl Cole was on X Factor? Correct. I love that.
You're right up my street. You're right up my street.
This is the most gay millennial shit ever. Pretty much.
Is knowing what Sheryl Cole said to Sher Lloyd on the stage of X Factor. From being obsessed with XFactor UK on YouTube in 2000.
Who knows? Wait a minute. A call from an 800 number.
No, don't pick up. No, well now it's in the voicemail and that means it's in God's hands.
It's in God's hands. It's actually rollercoaster number eight.
When it goes to voicemail, that means it's in God's hands. that is kind of how voicemail feels now.

Oh, yeah. You're just kind of,

it's a message in a bottle

and you're in a terrible stormy ocean.

Yeah.

Like, who knows if it'll get there.

Okay, so Oscars

and then we went to the Vanity Fair party.

Went to the Vanity Fair party.

That was so fun.

So fun.

Can I tell you my favorite sentence

that's ever come out of my mouth?

White Bestie Summer?

No, not White Bestie Summer. That was fun.
That was fun. This is my favorite sentence I've ever said out loud.
Okay. Madison Beer, do you know Alison Brie? Wow.
And they hadn't met, but they did. They did.
And you introduced them. Well, our friend Michael brought over Madison Beer, who I was so thrilled to meet.
I was obsessed with her. I said to her, Madison Beer, whenever anyone does the glam bot, I say, why are you doing the glam bot? You're over Madison Beer who I was so thrilled to meet and I said to her I said to her Madison Beer whenever anyone does the glam bot I say why are you doing the glam bot you're not Madison Beer and then she died at that I was trying to play it cool around her because Michael our friend yes Hoffman hello hi Michael somehow became besties with Madison Beer within seconds but before.
Sometimes you have chemistry with people like us.

But Madison was following

Michael into the crowd

and then we saw Michael

and said hi

and then I look over

and there was Madison Beer

and her full glory

and I was like,

hey, how are you?

I'm Bowen.

It's so nice to meet you.

Trying to play it cool.

How's your night going?

And then finally I was like,

finally you came over

and you were like,

you're Madison Beer.

And I dropped the whole thing. I was like, I mean, you're Madison obsessed.
And we invited her on the pod. I want to feel, feel, feel.
If you're not listening to Madison Beer's Becca are you a stan? Yes. Period.
Like Madison Beer's music is really good. And can I say as a boob gay period.
That's she is she is top tier. And then I was looking to my right at the glory that was Alison Brie.
And I said, well, I have to make this happen. I was like, Madison Brie, do you know Alison Brie? And they hadn't met.
They hugged. I can only assume traded numbers and became best friends.
We'll find out. What was the vibe? Because we were with Mr.
Hamm. Love him.
For Jon Hamm to be in close proximity to Alison Brie made me, truly thrilled me. Oh, my God.
You know what's funny? I didn't realize it until right after. I'm like, oh my God.
Fucking Don and Trudy were right there. It was Don and Trudy vibes.
Oh, that was good. Renee Rapp.
Renee Rapp. You really stay a legend.
This is my life now. This is actually like a perfect microcosm for like what the last month has been.
And it is my peak. And like, it's all downhill from here.
We're at the Vanity Fair party. We're talking, we're talking.
For this person to come up and tap me on the shoulder and be like, oh my God, thank God you're here. For this to be the person, I'm about to say three words.
This was good. We've all been this person at any party where it's like, oh, thank God you're here.
Yeah. Like I have someone to talk to.
Megan Thee Stallion comes up to me. She goes, oh my God, thank God you're here.
I'm like, hi. Hey, Megan Thee Stallion.
Someone I've fully been on a professional, have been lucky enough to be on a professional level with and worked with before. But it's still shocking to me whenever she's like, hi.
I'm like, hi. Bitch, it's Tina Snow.
Let's go. That whole party was just like, and I say this in the most revelant, revelant, I say this in the most, how do I say that I revere this? And the most reverent.
Reverent. I say this in the most reverent way.
The most random group of people ever. It's random as fuck.
All talking to each other. And I was like, woo.
And then I don't think we can say where we went next. We can't say where we went next, but I think we can say this because this is actually a huge moment that I want to share with people.
And it's like the perfect karmic, we went to a party and we were the Megan Thee Stallion in this situation where we look around, everyone's way too cool for us. And then we, this is the person that we zeroed in on and we were like, oh, we can talk to this person.
Yes. Chapel Rhone.
Chapel Rhone. And guess what? The groundwork has been laid.
The groundwork has been laid, yeah. I think this is the year for Chapel on Lost Coast.
We're just putting it out there, but... Incredibly cool.
I mean, like, was... Duh.
Did I help facilitate that introduction between you and her? Yes, you did. And that was so kind.
And, like, she was so sweet and, like... But I got to tell her.
And I told her, like, when I first met her, I was, like, or when I first talked to her for interview, I was just like, my best friend, Matt Rodgers, was years ahead of the curve. Wow.
And I was just like, look, I was like, Chappell, this is my friend, Matt. Like, we're besties.
And you two hit it off. She's cool as hell.
She really liked you. Yeah, I mean, listen, we love Chappell Rohn.
And I'm excited about, I guess, oh, by the time this comes out, The Giver! I guess by the time this comes out slash tomorrow, The Giver, we're headed for a really fun Chapel era. Definitely.
You ain't gotta tell me. Baby, I do that.
I'm excited. Baby, I'm a Giver! I love it.
It's really... Great bridge.
God. She's a bridge queen.
Thank God too. You know what I love about Mayhem? Not a song under three minutes on that goddamn album.
And thank God for Gaga for bringing back the breakdown outro. Please.
The outros are it helps you live in the song.

I think you can apply this across the board,

especially in terms of a pop structure.

It's like,

outro us.

Show off the production.

Highlight the production.

This is just as key

in the song as the vocals.

Not to give them too much credit,

but her highest pitchfork ever.

Yeah, sure.

8.0.

Mr. Rich.

Mm-hmm.

Great, great review.

And I think it's deserved. And also, it's so great to see it get the critical acclaim.
Mm-hmm. But, okay, so are we moving on to Gaga now? Yes.
Okay. I mean...
Now you know she was on the podcast. Now you know she's on the podcast.
Which we had to keep a secret for a long time. Yes.
And, um... You love her.
I'm still not... So we're recording this on Monday, two days after the show.
And I, God, just like, that is a consummate entertainer in every way. Killa, I got to see the soundcheck for it on Thursday and I lost my mind.
So good. One of the most memorable, both of her performances, some of the most memorable in recent memory.
We got to go on the floor to watch Abracadabra and you had been saying like, Abracadabra goes crazy. And it did.
And we were also just ganked before we started on the podcast. We were like, Gaga performed where Ali once performed.
Gaga performed where Ali once performed. I was honored to introduce her for Abracad'Napra.
So I brought my friends, my dressing room guests, which included Matt, to the floor. We were waiting in the tunnel, steps away from the host quick change booth where she was getting into her red encrusted Loire bodysuit.
Vocally warming up. Vocally warming up.
Unbelievable. To be able to be there while she was like in the zone

and getting her voice ready

and then just watching her walk on stage

and just destroy that performance.

At dress rehearsal.

And I think this did happen on air too,

but like on the walkout when she was walking on stage

when everyone in the audience could see her.

I've never heard a gasp like that.

Everyone's like, oh.

Looks all night too. Like even when she was going over to the after party, like, that was amazing.
And just, you see the shots that they got of her coming out of the limo, just her one eye in the spot. The one eye poking out.
Truly good. Holding Pip the mouse.
Oh, yeah. Oh, holding Pip the mouse.
The sketches were so good, too. Just, like, on fire this week.
And I told Bobby like her manager was like I feel like this is reflective of like who she is and you know maybe even on the nose what the album is. I'm seeing on the nose like my analysis of it.
It's like all 10 to 1 sketches. Yeah.
Weird. It was weird from the top.
I was like I remember the first sketch being that scooter sketch. Yeah.
yeah, yeah. We were all turning to each other and your dresser were going to be like,

that was the first sketch was like a huge swing.

Which I loved.

I loved.

And I'm like,

wait,

I'm like so invested

in this romance now

between Marcelo and Gaga.

I know.

So sweet.

It was good.

That little pug.

That was good.

I'm getting the dog tomorrow. It is time for you, isn't it? I have like dog fever.
Yeah. I need one.
And you're burning up. I need one.
And I'm burning up, burning up for you, baby. A Jonas Brothers shout.
Yeah. Why not? Love them.
Jersey Kings. Oh, I never really think about it like that.

I never think about the Jonas Brothers as Jersey

Kings, but I guess it's a rule of culture.

Number 30. The Jonas Brothers are

Jersey Kings.

And then,

I can't believe I got to sing with her twice.

That was never the plan. Bowen, that was amazing.

The plan was always just,

let's have fun. I'm going to try to write

a couple things.

And then I just lucked out in every possible way like this past week. You sounded so good.
And I said, I was like, I was like, did you, did you actually do some sort of little vocal training? Because your placement and like the ease with which you were getting up there, you do sing very high. But like, you were very like...
Something about being next to her. Yeah, like osmosis.
I know that sounds crazy, but I would say at Chromatica Ball, I was the best singer. Well, we were on a lot of mushrooms that night.
We were on a lot of mushrooms, but there's something about the chemical shit that happens, your brain chemistry giving you singing ability. Singing ability.
Y'all just hit 35 minutes, by the way. Thank you, Becca.
Oh. No, that's a great way to communicate with us.
Because we're just in it. You know, that's how producers talk to housewives on set.
Yeah, so they have like, so what you don't know is that. What are you on right now? Google Docs? What are you on? It's a Google slide.
It was a Google slide. Becca put up a Google slide just on a white background that said, y'all just hit 35 minutes BTW.
So I, at one point in my life, was hanging out with someone who produces for the Housewives. Yes.
And they were telling me that the way that they get them to ask certain questions is they'll put up like a tablet. They'll show it to Meredith Marks and they'll be like,

ask Angie about this,

this,

this, this on like at the restaurant.

And that's how they get reminded to answer certain questions or,

or ask certain things,

et cetera.

Wow.

Is that it's just a producer.

Like our very own producer,

Becca was producing us just now.

Yes.

This is how it works.

It's kind of like some person at a club, like holding up their phone, being like, play. Yeah.
Yes. This is how it works.
It's kind of like some person at a club like holding up their phone being like play. Yeah.
Play. Stream mayhem.
Stream mayhem. Play.
Be Ophelia. Exactly.
Yeah. That's you.
That's me. Play Be Ophelia.
Okay. What else? Talking about.
Gaga. Oh yeah.
I just. Amazing.
Oh yeah. Vocally.
No. We just.
We We did extensive music rehearsals with her in a way that made me really appreciate, because she just kept turning to me and going, it'll just be so much funnier if we sound great. And I was like, 100%.
100%. And she was just so exact about the way things were phrased and the way things scanned on the melody.
And we found the right key because like it was in like it was like in G and then we got it all the way up or down I don't know girl you were up there we were I think it was a B a B sharp or a B whatever it was just like we tried it out all these different ways you got in your pocket but like to find the right key with a duet with Gaga I didn't realize until literally just now what that sort of would like what that means to me yep and it was so fun i mean i can't believe it and then it's crazy and then i don't know like what she said to us what she said to me and celeste news Newsflash, she loves Celeste. Everyone loves Celeste.

Any person who

you would think seems

distant or, I don't know,

unassailable in a way

is obsessed with Celestium.

And I get it.

Yeah, who would it be?

Christopher Vega.

The Christopher Vega. It's Matt's nickname for Celeste.

For some reason. It makes sense when you're there.
It makes sense when you're there. It's like being next to Gaga singing.
Exactly. It's like, you know.
But Gaga was just like telling me and Celeste, and this is what she brought up on our episode, like community. She's really been revisiting this idea, this thing that she misses a lot about coming up in New York is that she was like every night doing shows at the Slipper Room, like having comedians on or doing like, like, you know what I mean? Like she was like, she was a New York artist.
She was a New York artist. Community is so important.
Doing her very different version of like what you and I were doing, not to like compare things, but it's like you and I would like bring our fucking props to like shows and like be on lineups with people. And that's how we got to meet people.
And that's why we still keep in touch with these people and still have these relationships that we cultivate. Like I completely, I love that this is the thing that she's like really returning to.
She is like grounded and happy and like really inspired in a way that like we haven't seen in a long time. Not since Chromatica, but that was during COVID when we couldn't really see it.
She wasn't really out there doing too much press for it. And it feels like in the last five years, she's really been in that place.
And I just love that she, that we got to intersect at all with her, that you and I did, that the show, that SN did. She's on like a mission of joy too.
I feel like the, the like emotional, um, landscape of Chromatica was different because it came from a different place. Like she's on record saying it came from a place of real pain.
And so she, she's so clearly joyful right now. And there was something about like, even with watching her to bounce from sketch to sketch at SNL, et cetera, like watching her do the press that she's doing surrounding mayhem and that she involved us in that was so lovely.
And, you know, it's just, it feels like it's a really good moment. I also think, you know, I'm obviously sitting here gagged at you're singing in that sketch, but I don't think she's sounded better in years.
And we were saying to her, like, obviously on the album, the way that she sings is just so mind-blowing. But, you know, I think it's the best singing that she's done.
Which is obviously saying something. She's one of the greats, but...
Perfect celebrity? You kidding me? Even at the end of How Bad Do You Want Me? It is happening again where I listen to an album and I do get, I love everything on the album, but I get stuck on one song. That's totally normal.
It happens every time something comes out. I get stuck on one song and just can't get over it.
I love it. It's so interesting watching the fans discuss that song.

Well, you know,

but Bobby Campbell

was saying like

the day of the album

coming out,

he goes,

it's just so interesting

because like

so much of what

the fans are saying

are just echoes

of what you and Matt

were saying

in the hotel

as we listened to it.

And like,

it never crossed their minds.

They were like,

oh, I guess it does sound

like a Taylor song.

Because I did say

45 seconds into listening to How Bad Do You Want Me, I did say, this is giving Taylor. And Bobby was like, really? And I was like, but is it not? And that has...
I will drag myself now and I will also drag everyone who's kind of saying that and here's why. Don't get upset yet.
What I'm going to say is Taylor didn't invent that kind of pop music. back to the fame before Taylor was doing pop Lady Gaga had big emotional pop songs like paparazzi that's a big emotional pop song Gaga also has roots in this kind of thing she hasn't done it in a while but I feel like to give this entire genre to Taylor speaks a little bit to like Taylor's omnipresence,

which I guess is understandable.

Yes.

But let's not say

this isn't a Gaga song

because it's very much a Gaga song

if you give it some God, I think.

I just love that I'm in this.

I like that I'm able to radiate out

from this album

and connect it to other Gaga things

where I'm like,

this is the same woman

who sang fucking Edge of Glory,

which is basically

like a Springsteen song,

who sang Shallow, obviously.

And everything off of Joanne

and everything.

And like Rick Rubin shit on Art Pop.

It's like she's so expansive

as an artist.

It's a combination.

It's like,

she's my favorite. She's my favorite.
Name another legend. Anyway.
All right. Now, did we feel like we did a culture catch up? Is there anything that we missed that people are going to be saying, well, we missed it, which doesn't feel good.
Doesn't feel good. Oh, God.
We don't like that. No, I think we covered our bases.
And now we present to you our very, very...

We don't know what the conversation is yet

because we haven't had it.

I have some thoughts about things to ask her.

Me too.

Wouldn't you believe it?

We're so excited to talk to Cate Blanchett.

Here it is.

Our conversation with two-time Academy Award winner,

Cate Blanchett!

Cate Blanchett. K.
Blanchett. K.
Blanchett. K.
Blanchett. We love LA.
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Ding dong! Las Culturistas calling. Well, we're sitting here with one of the greatest ever.
Truly, truly, truly

one of the greatest ever.

Okay.

I mean, we're not gonna

waste any time.

She's here.

We've done a whole preamble already.

Two-time Oscar winner.

Countless BAFTAs.

And the winner

of the Cate Blanchett Award

for good acting

at the Las Culturistas Culture Awards,

which I believe

gagged the audience harder

than anything that happened that night.

It was a harder gag than even when like, I'm gonna to say Taylor sent in two videos and that was a gag. But when Cate Blanchett sent a I was going to say wordless, but no, you did say the words, I won.
Yes. Confetti went up in the air.
It was a huge acceptance moment. I think your dog got scared.
It was a big moment for everybody. Yes.
Well, it deserved

it. I mean, this is

the start of Black Bag, which is

out this Friday, which we saw. We love

Soderbergh's new one. I mean, so

exciting. And let's

waste no more time. Everyone, please welcome into your ears

Cate Blanchett!

Thank you. Thanks for

having me. Okay, we just discussed

a shoe theory. Yeah, tell us this.
No, I was told today. What? While I was wearing white sneakers, that if you wear white sneakers, it means you're not getting any.
You are not a fornicator. And I just went, hang on a minute.
I'm a huge fornicator. Massive.
And I've been sending out really bad signals for quite a long time. I have three pairs, which I wear, I alternate.
So I'm basically in, well, I'm not today, I'm wearing heels. You're wearing heels.
But a lot of the time, I'm sending out non-fornication signals. Did this person seem like an authority on this? Or were you like, okay.
He said it with great authority. But I was, and I was very alarmed.
You know, you, you're getting dressed for yourself. You don't over, well, I mean, I didn't overthink the sequence at all.
You're in the right place. But, you know, you don't think that's a signal you're sending out.
Right, never. Maybe if you wore a nun's habit or a neck to knee and gloves, you think maybe.
Oh, so is that what this person was saying? Like it's a chastity signal? Well, I don't know. It seemed to be a little bit like wearing your keys on whichever.
Is that really 80s? Wait, what's that about? Oh my God. You guys, I am so much older than you.
We know what this is. This is so 70s and 80s.
I think this could come back though. I'm not even gay and I know this.

As like a way to like say what? You just did that.

So if you do that,

does that mean I'm available?

Oh, I'm available.

Everything I do is shouting

that I'm available.

And I also want to say

I wear white sneakers a lot.

And you were saying

I don't have problems.

Before we rolled it, Matt was.

What sex problems?

You don't have problems getting it. No, I'm saying my sluttiest times were when I was in a white converse.
I used to wear a white leather converse to like weddings where I was single. But were you wearing anything else? I was wearing like a blue suit or a red suit.
My wedding sort of dragged. Yeah.
And then a white leather converse because I think I'm gay and can get away with it. You go to a a straight wedding and you can kind of take a swing with the shoe.
You know what I mean? But not with a white converse. Apparently.
Did you get any of that eating? I did. I hooked up with the bride's cousin.
Oh, okay. So it's rubbish.
Yes, I'm telling you. I don't need to be worried.
I can put them back on. My bunion will be so happy.
There you go. Buy another pair.
I'm going to buy another pair. Honestly, though, because they're white, they get a little scuffed.
You need a backup and a backup backup. Well, that's what I said.
I said in a very apologetic way. I said, well, they're a little bit scuffy and dirty.
So does that mean, I don't know. You've been out in the streets.
Maybe that looks desperate. That's like, I'm trying to pretend that I'm not wearing them.
Anyway, I was freaked out. No.
By a message that I didn't know that I was sending. I don't believe anyone believes that.
That I'm not getting any. No, you don't give celibate.
Okay, I don't give celibate? No. Thank you so much.
I came into the room. Could you play celibate? Could you play celibate? Have you ever played celibate? Have you played a nun? Not intentionally.
I have played a nun. An alcoholic nun.
Yes. An alcoholic nun.
Yes. What film was that? Who then prostrated herself on the grave of a priest.
But I don't think that that was sexual. Okay.
At least intentionally. I see.
And did it feel right in the body? Did it feel good in the spirit? Like you would do it again? Yeah, I didn't wear underwear. Okay.
But it was set back in time. Yeah.
Speaking of not wearing underwear, well, I played Queen of the Elves. They gave the, I don't know, the toy manufacturing thing to some company.
And a lot of the hobbits were very upset because they didn't feel that those toys were going to be made properly. And then I had one child and I have four.
So clearly I fornicate. There's no issue here.
But I gave the elf toy of me, of Galadriel, to my son. And he was really upset because he said, elves don't wear underwear.
And they hadn't bothered to put underwear on the elf toy. But they did for the they did for the hobbits you said no no but the hobbits were upset because they didn't feel the toys were going to be made properly and they weren't because i wore underwear as an elf i think elves do wear underwear i think so when you say the hobbits were upset do you mean the actors who play the hobbits are you talking about my friends i yes the hobbit community oh i meant i meant the hob the actor hobbit yes they're not really hobbits right right right yeah elijah BTS, they weren't The Hobbit community.
Oh, I meant the actor Hobbit. Yes, of course.
They're not really Hobbits. Right, right, right.
Elijah Wood is not really Hobbits. Yeah.
No, I guess I have not ever had the experience of having a toy made of me in my fashion. Oh, you will.
I don't think so. That injustice will be corrected.
Do you have input in that process? Well, no, clearly I didn't because if they had asked me, I would have said they had knitted underwear.

Yeah, knitted.

I think philandrial out of elf kind of web.

Yeah.

Sure.

Yeah.

But if you're immortal, if you're an elf in Tolkien's world, in Middle Earth, it's like...

You don't need to wash your underwear, but you need to wear it.

Yes.

Okay.

Yeah.

All right.

Wow.

I never thought about their process in terms of like their sartorial nature.

I know you should see this toy.

It was disgusting.

It's like Barbie not having genitals.

Do you think after the Barbie movie that the Barbies are now going to have genitals? I mean, that's how kids learn about stuff. You know what's funny? One time I remember seeing when I was a kid, there was a Ken with like more of a lump there.
And I was being, it did weird me out. And I was like, if people thought this was something that needed to be corrected, I can now tell you as someone who's seen a Ken with like more of a lump there.
And I was being, it did weird me out. And I was like,

if people thought this was something that needed to be corrected,

I can now tell you as someone

who's seen a Ken with a penis,

we didn't need this.

But it was a lump is not a penis.

A lump is a lump.

But it was a suggestion.

A lump is something you need to get checked.

Yeah.

Right.

He needed help.

Yeah.

But I know.

I don't know.

That was an infirm Ken.

Yeah.

I know.

I didn't learn a lot from Barbies growing up.

Or Ken's. What did you play with? What did I play with? As a kid.
I had a ballerina Barbie. And so the crown, you could turn her around.
I had one of, which I loved, is I had one of those dolls, which was a Red Riding Hood wolf doll. And when you turned it upside down, it was the wolf and the other way around.
So you can do all the voices. Yes.
I love that. And the wolf had a skirt? Well, yes, when it was the wolf.
Right. Oh, but the wolf was dressed as the grandmother.
Oh, wait. Was it Red Riding Hood and the wolf? Because that changes the story in a way that I love.
Yes, it wasn't the grandmother. Oh, wow.
But the wolf was dressed as the grandmother. Yeah, but the skirt was kind of brown.
It was a bit Amish. It was an Amish wolf.
I got it. It was an Amish wolf.
Of course. God, what a performance they were giving.
What did you guys play with? I had an Aladdin Ken doll, and he had the suggestion of a lump as well. Okay.
And kind of a queer awakening for me. I went, well, he's really handsome.
I'd like to see him naked. Right.
You know, I think, okay, so you're saying children learn from these dolls. Well, they could.
Right. They could learn from the dolls.
I just, I'm not learning as much as I am just like intrigued by my own like fascination. You know what I mean? Like I'm.
Well, you definitely with those dolls, they're made to be dressed and undressed. Yes.
So it could be, I mean, then when your body starts to change

and you go, oh, okay.

Yeah, I think one of my favorite parts...

This is no longer a lump.

It's something.

This lump does something.

It's meaning something else.

One of my favorite parts

of the Barbie movie

was the depiction of, like,

the fucked Barbie

that Kate McKinnon played,

the one that was just

rode hard and put away wet.

I really was the king of the Barbies.

My sister had dozens of them

for some reason.

And... And you were never given any? So, no.
But I kind of was, I did, I remember actually one of my earliest memories. I'm from Long Island.
Was sitting on Santa's lap and asking for a Barbie. And his reaction being really negative.
And so I could never ask for one because it was really explicit in that moment. Like, don't ask for that.
Like, this sort of Long Island man playing Santa really instilled it in me. Which is creepy anyway.
Exactly. I mean, it's really, that's all a lot.
We did the visit to the grotto with our kids one time when they were little. And they were like, this is wrong.
And you're sort of watching it as a parent, like, seeing the pageantry a little differently, I would imagine. Yeah.
Yeah. I think I was quite traumatized by the Santa Claus grotto growing up.
All the photos were like, get me out of here. Kids can smell the booze.
Parents taking the photo are slightly removed so they can't smell it as much. They're not within an inch of...
But I'm sure that was before they did the safety check. Yes, I mean, it's just like allowing your children to go over there and have a private conversation with this like… With a dude who's wearing, who you cannot recognize.

Right.

Yeah, yeah.

Who's just truly ensconced in like all this like fun, friendly stuff.

And it's just, it's dark.

It belies something very dark.

It does.

Very dark indeed.

But the Barbie thing I remember for us, me and my sister, was a lot about survival.

We would play Titanic with the Barbies and like they would slowly one by one pass away to the devastation that was caused by the Titanic hitting that iceberg in 1912. And the one that remained got to be undressed? It was all about surely it was all about undressing.
It was always like this is me as a kid. It was always like the blonde prettiest Barbie.
She wore like a blue, very shiny mini dress.

And it was always her.

She was always the sole survivor,

the rose as it were.

Uh-huh.

Of course.

But yeah, no,

I do remember like really loving

that group of,

that community of women

that was the Barbies.

The ensemble cast.

I know,

and you never had your own.

But I only had the one.

I found them boring in the end.

Right.

I loved the movie,

but I found,

yeah, the actual.

So my kids have never had

Thank you. when you never had your own.
But I only had the one. I found them boring in the end.
Right. I love the movie, but I found, yeah, the actual.
So my kids have never had Barbies. Probably good.
Would you, besides Galadriel, would you want other characters that you portray to be dolls? I feel like a Sheba Hart doll would be very fun. A Notes on a Scandal doll set would be very fun.
That would be interesting. That would be interesting.
There were some really good games you could play with those dolls.

You know what's funny? Separately of

each other, we were like, we obviously watched Black Bag

Phenomenal. And then

we each picked one

of your other movies watching last night, Didn't Tell Each Other.

It was Notes on a Scandal. It is one of our

favorite films. It is fun

every time. Judi Dench.

Oh my god. She turns 90-something.
Wow. She's just had her birthday.
Yeah. Yeah, she's a legend.
Juno Temple. A young Juno Temple.
Wow, oh my gosh. Yes, she was my daughter.
Yes. How old I am.
Yeah, but she was fabulous. Well, she's amazing.
I wanted to ask, like, the really just pronounced queerness of your filmography. Is that,, it's really, it's really something.
I mean, I was thinking about it and there's elements of this in a lot of what you do. Really? Yeah, I mean, Tar, obviously.
I guess it's growing up in Sydney. Yeah, you think so? I spent so much time at Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras, which was was wild.
I think it's been a bit OH&S now,

but the parties were so fabulous. I went a couple of years ago for World Pride and I was really

blown away by how Sydney really committed to and embraced the fact that they were hosting Pride.

It was really lovely, especially now with everything going on. Looking back at that,

I was like, I wonder if an American city would go for it this hard because Sydney was, it really

felt beautiful to be there because it felt like a very queer city. Yeah, it totally is.
What is OH&S? It's Occupational Health and Safety. Oh! I see, I see, I see.
Did I get the acronym right? Wait, so, and you're saying Australia Mardi Gras? No, no, no. The things that went on in those bathrooms.
I see, of course. In those bathrooms.
In those fire traps those fire traps, in the clubs that, you know, you were probably too young to go to, you know, that they've all been kind of cordoned off. Sure.
Yeah. I feel like you would have a fun experience going to, I think those events are still happening the world over.
Yeah. I would encourage you to, would you? To seek them out in my white sneakers.
In your white sneakers. Yeah.
Hey, dude, back off. Yeah, listen., back off.
Yeah, listen. Leave me alone.
I'm not interested. Don't you see my feet? I'm a non-fornicator.
Yeah, hello. Look at the shoes.
We're going to Berlin in a couple weeks. We're going to go to Berghain.
Oh my God. Have you been? Yes.
Yes? Yes, once. It's pretty wild.
Did you wait in line and do the whole thing of being... Yeah, I knew someone who knew someone who knew someone.
Okay, I gotcha. Was this recent? I can't remember.
Maybe five, six years ago. Okay.
It was pre-COVID. Yeah, sure.
Just pre-COVID, I guess. This will be our first time.
You don't need to keep your eyes open. Things just happen.
Things just happen. Oh, yeah.
You can close your eyes and things happen. And things happen.
Well, it depends where you are.

It's a bit of a labyrinth.

Sure.

I mean, and look, there are things and places that I did not go into.

Sure.

A bit too genie for me.

Genie.

A bit too genie is kind of a bad thing.

A bit too genie.

I just want to go to the, did you go to the gelato stand?

Yes, I did.

Is this a famous thing?

Yeah, there's a gelato stand that people like, everyone's just serving gelato. Oh, I love it.
A little light relief. Sure.
A palate cleanser. A little cooling off, as it were.
Yeah. Oh, that's fun.
From the delights, from the carnal pleasures. Oh, wow.
So is this a research trip? It is. How did you know? How did you know? I don't know.
I just assumed.

Yeah. Always working.

There was a glimmer in our eye.

Oh, wow.

No, we're excited.

We're excited.

Okay, I don't want to

prize it out.

No, no, no.

You can prize it out.

I was just going to say

we, I can't tell if we want

to go down the friend

of a friend of a friend

route or if we,

I think it would be

informative for us

to wait in the line

and either way.

Who is being rejected?

Yes.

They won't reject you. I don't know.
I think they might. I think I might.
I don't think you look gay. At all.
Would that count against us? I know. What are they looking for? I don't know.
You're too gay. We won't wear white shoes, because what if they feel that way? What if they feel that way? This week, I was telling Gaga this when she was at SNL.
I was like, she was like, what are you doing for the breakers? she was phenomenal amazing phenomenal amazing god phenomenal anyway anyway but the only thing more exciting was you introduced I am so thrilled I'm not excited I'm not excited I was yeah it was amazing it was volcanic volcanic no I did erupt she was saying that she has been turned away she's been turned away from that line because they were like, I think the implication was she was like, I think it was because I was a woman and it was a bit too sexy of a night, a bit too fornicate-y of a night in a way that was exclusive to phalluses. You know what I mean? Oh, okay.
So I think maybe that's a thing that happens depending on if you're going to You can buy a phallus. She could have bought one.
Yeah, totally. We can all buy a phallus.
We can all buy a phallus. You can't buy a hole.
You can't buy an orifice. Wouldn't you agree? Well, you have many of them.
So many. But don't you want to like, I think buying a phallus gives you like a degree of removal in a way that you're like, oh, I'm purely using this as an instrument.
I can put this away. A hole's a hole and you're stuck with it.
I don't mind being stuck with mine. I'm quite happy.
I don't want to. I'm pleased to have all the holes I have.
But I'm... Talk to me after you've been to Berghain.
Yeah. Oh my god.
This is a family show. This is a family show.
This is for family communities. I don't think anyone's, they're not going to be shook by anything we say on this episode.
But are you taking in a microphone? You won't be allowed to take it in unless you... Oh no, we're not taking anything.
But it's research. It's research where the phone's being put away.
Right. But there's so, actually there's so few spaces that you can go now where you are private like that, where people can really, that's what I loved about the late 80s going to all of the dance parties in Sydney for the Mardi Gras is because people were just there.

They were so present.

They were just together collectively having a great time that was non-aggressive.

No one was being recorded. No one cared what anyone did.
The other night we went to a place like that. There's a place called Basement.
Yes. They put the tag on the phone.
It was, it celebrated the idea of just go do it. I think people are profoundly relieved and they feel, I don't need to record this.
Right. I can just tell people or not.
Yeah. But now it feels like that chasm between that kind of event,

that ideal is widening from the thing that's very common now

at like an award show, let's say,

where you've got lip readers,

you're being photographed in between.

Lip readers?

Oh, yeah.

On TikTok, there'll be people that are, you know,

looking at a video of two celebrities talking to each other

and they'll lip read.

And it looks like it could be exactly what it is.

Thank you. be people that are, you know, looking at a video of two celebrities talking to each other and at an award show, they'll lip read.
And it looks like it's, it looks like it could be exactly what they're saying in a way that's a little bit odd. That's really what I mean, do something, learn Ikebana or something.
I mean, it's like the skill. There are so many trains to pick up.
Yeah. Wow.
But that makes it feel even kind of more treacherous. Yeah, it is treacherous.
You know, you do see celebrities nowadays on the carpet going like this a lot because, you know, those are the ones on TikTok and know they're at risk of being lip read. Yeah.
Yeah. But I mean, I say, I mean, it's blasphemy.
Go back to the day when it wasn't televised. You know, bring that back and just have a great party where people can just let go.
I mean, the industry is so scattered in such a point of which I think could potentially be exciting or it could be really depressing. Right.
But it's at a pivot point. Yeah.
And so we need to gather together and celebrate what it is that we do. Right.
Without it having to have any public facing. I mean, the fashion's great and all of that stuff.
We will find out in the end who won or who didn't win. Yeah.
Right. You know, but it would be so nice that that happened behind closed doors.
Absolutely. It would be a very different evening.
You were saying that, especially after, you know, the Oscars just happened and there's, it just feels like the march to that evening is so long. Do you feel there's maybe too many ceremonies? Yes.
Well, that's what you're saying. Like, un-televised some of them.
Yes. You still have them.
It's so great. It's so great that people's work is celebrated.
And that way, I think there's a kind of a sense that, because this is the thing, all these films are amazing. And so many amazing films and performances and all of the craft awards cinematography and you know there you want you want to celebrate them of course but you can get sick of those films by the time because they all get whittled down as they must yes and then i don't want to get sick of any of those films because they're brilliant yeah it's like on face value there there doesn't need to be an over conversation about anora the way that it's happening on online and stuff like that to the point where we really lose the forest for the trees it's a great film everyone in it is amazing full stop and Sean Baker is a genius yeah yes he is I've been such a fan of his work for such a long time he's brilliant yeah Red Rocket Red Rocket it was really incredible when she got off the bed with him and then sang like an angel at the synth, it was just breathtaking.
Yeah.

Even just his earliest stuff has the same DNA of like the realism to it.

It's all pretty consistent. We love LA.

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All episodes streaming April 4th on Hulu. What was the most Soderbergh thing that he did on Black Bag? I feel like he's such an expansive filmmaker.
He can do pretty much anything. Like, I think it's crazy that he's like under budget so many times when he makes films.
Under time. Under time.
He's got this. He made The Presence, if you haven't seen that recently.
I don't think I've ever seen it. Lucy Liu was in it and the cast was amazing.
Oh, he loved Lucy Liu. And it was set in a house where a family moved in and it was haunted by a presence and so the whole narrative unfolds according to what the presence in the house learns.
Oh. So it's amazing.
But he shot that, I think, in nine or 11 days.

What?

So it's like, oh, man,

how quickly are we going to shoot Black Bag?

But the thing with Soderbergh is he's so economical.

He's so, he always gets into work early.

He knows how he's going to shoot it.

But the reason why he started to operate,

I asked him finally, I'd worked with him before,

but I'd forgotten to ask him.

He edits, he lights, he shoots, he directs.

He doesn't write anymore. But he said the reason why he operates is because he wants it to keep moving and flowing.
And he doesn't want the actors to go off the boil waiting around between takes and setups. And so what he does is you start at the normal time, but you're done by three, which is great.
Wow, huge. You want to pick up your kids from school or, I don't know, get on a plane and go to Berghain, whatever your thing on JAG is.

But then what he does, he's such a workhorse, is he goes and he edits.

And so where he spends the money is keeping the sets open.

So if he needs to pick something up, he can.

And so he assembles the thing, but then he's really forensic.

He goes, no, that's too long.

No, that piece of information needs to be revealed there.

And so it's a really fluid thing with him.

of the assembles the thing but then he's really forensic he goes no that's too long no that piece of information needs to be revealed there and so it's a really fluid thing with him so you've got to dance with him but he did say typical Soderbergh was I said we did one take and he wanted to move on and I said to him I said I said are we moving on because you're bored or because you've got it. And he went, yes and yes.

Oh!

And so he was bored with me

and he got it.

So he's,

but he's great.

He's really blunt,

but he really,

really loves actors.

Yeah.

And the cast in Black Bag,

it's so great.

Oh, no.

Yeah, it's really,

I was surprised

that it was such an ensemble.

Yeah, it is.

And then it really is,

like it's like watching a very thrilling, stylish play. Yeah.
And I say that And obviously,

the,

the, the, the, the, the a fun, almost like Poirot, Agatha Christie-esque ending to it that I loved. Yeah.
Well, it's basically about Fassbinder. Michael Fassbinder and I play husband and wife.
And they're espionage, you know, MI5, MI6, but it's all with technology. So it's a real, it's like, oh my God, I can't even open my phone.
So that was the acting bit that I had to do. But they're devoted to each other.
They're married. And then he suspects her of being involved in this, releasing this cyber worm.
She sounds pretty icky. Yeah, cyber worm.
I wouldn't want to hear the noise that a cyber worm. It's probably, yeah, I was going to say.
Did you ever see that Cronenberg film? With a little beeps and bops. You know the Cronenberg film Existence? Existence? For sure.
We're squeamish. Oh, no, no, no.
The noise that it made when Jennifer Jason Leigh and Jude Law put the portal into their body. Oh, wow.
It made me want to throw, It was like... How did you feel about the substance? The substance? What, the noises in the substance? Yeah, the noise.
I thought the sound was unreal. Unbelievable.
I had a similar kind of thing. Yeah.
Misophonia? Misophonia? Yes, misophonia and kinophobia. Okay.
Which is what Tar had. Yes! Oh, right.
Yeah. So, speaking of Tar, because this was truly our favorite movie.
I remember we watched it. We didn't see it together the first time.
We didn't see it together, but we both had the same exact check-in with each other. We were like, wow, wow, wow.
Well, I remember leaving the movie the first time and feeling really confused after the first five and 10 minutes walking out of the movie being like, what? And then I realized like, as I thought of it, I was like, that was phenomenal. And it just wasn't ultimately the genre I thought it was going to be at the top.
I thought it ended up being this like incredibly funny satire in a way, but also like presenting as this like very stark drama from the whole time. And it is both of those things.
But the question I wanted to ask you was, and I find this with several of your movies, are you ever really surprised when you see the end result of something in terms of the tone and genre from when you read it the first time? There was so much. I mean, Tire made in first setting, because it asks a lot of the audience.
Right. It made a lot of people really angry.
Uh-huh. And, you know, I was really grateful to the critics and the people who had seen it who kept alive all of the audience.
It made a lot of people really angry. And, you know, I was really grateful

to the critics and the people who had seen it, who kept alive all of the other balls that Todd Field had written. Because people said, oh, it's about cancel culture, or it's about abuses of power.
But it wasn't. I always thought it was about what happens in the art, for me personally, anyway when we create something, we forget that we have to destroy something, you know.
And so it's the destructive urge in the creative force. You don't have to be an artist to have a creative force, but we all want to make something in the world.
But you often have to be very brutal with yourself when you make that. And there was quite a lot of, there was kind of a ghost story in there absolutely and so we you know and there were elements in there i guess it's far enough away i didn't want to talk about it when it was coming out because you don't want to tell an audience too much with a movie like that no definitely but you know we shot things or talked about things that we decided not to shoot in the end you know that that um the gift and i've got friends who are conductors who have perfect pitch.
You probably have perfect pitch, Rowan. I do not.
I apparently have a three octave range, though. Wow.
Apparently. I just wanted to throw that in there.
There we go. No, but that she had perfect pitch and incredible music ability that her parents were.
She was raised deaf parents so when i thought about the early there was an early sequence and these are very very minor things that that i used there was a shot i think from memory of her conducting as a student which i think it ended up in the movie and i used sign language to to to how i conducted then but that was just fun i, you know, they're not even Easter eggs because you're not ever thinking that the audience will pick those things up. But there was so much in there and he's such a great writer.
I have to get him out of the barn, Todd Field. So he makes another film before 10 years pass.
The barn. The barn.
But it's hard to pry someone out of a barn. They're cozy.
No, I'm just saying like... Do you have a barn? You want a barn, don't you? I want a barn.
But you want someone to pry you out of it. I'm going into the barn! I would love a barn.
Are you kidding me? I think you'd be great in a barn. I really do.
Thank you. I think you would love a barn, personally.
Not very good with hay and all that. No, it doesn't have to be hay.
No, it's just... I like my little creature comforts, but so do you.
Now I'm thinking you wouldn't love a barn. You could have cashmere barn.
Cashmere blind barn. Cashmere barn.
A little barn. A barn by Wayfair.
I don't mean a barn functionally. I mean a barn just in terms of...
A metaphorical barn. Yeah, somewhere to go.
Yeah. He has a literal and a metaphorical barn.
There you go. It's a two for a job.
It's like you got to bring him out of the headspace and the actual physical space. True.
Well, I mean, Tar is just, for me, do you consider it a comedy? Because I feel like it's one of the great comedies. I thought Samadisha was really funny.
Yeah. You know, I mean, how seriously she took herself.
The second time I watched it, I couldn't stop laughing at the first conversation she's had in the talkback. It's so funny.
Just how seriously she takes herself and like the performance that is happening and really the amount of ego. Because that's really ultimately, I think, it's just like crazy meditation on ego.
Yeah, well, it is. But you have to, having stepped onto the podium in front of the Dresden Philharmoni as a woman, you know, but as a conductor anyway, is they sense fear.
So you have to, as a conductor, you have to have a lot of chutzpah. And that you have to say, this is where we're going.
And because I realize it's a bit like boarding school, like a lot of the members, they're all soloists, right? But the conductor has to bring them to make one unified sound. So there's a lot of egos and complications and they would all come up to me and start talking to me and telling me things about, you know, I know I'm acting as the first cello, but I'm really only the second cello.
So I'm really concerned about, and it was like, you have to hold all of this stuff together. But I got up there and they hadn't played together because of COVID.

The orchestra hadn't played together for quite a long, many, many months. And so when I said, look, in my bad German, I said, when I'm, you know, I'm not an actor.
I mean, I'm not a conductor. You're not actors.
And we're going to have to swap roles. So let's be patient with one another.
And I gave the downbeat at the rehearsal and they didn't follow me.

And I went, let's start again.

And they all went, oh, and they realized, in fact, that I didn't.

I mean, I was I was winging it.

I did a lot of, you know, preparation. And I examined the score and everything.

And I had the music in my those bits of music in my head.

But it was such a gift because then they had to lean in and realize that we did have to do it together but it's not a film about conducting so it's not well I feel like you telling that story filtered through the character of Lydia Tarr makes me think of like I am Petra's father it's like that is that's the same person in a completely different context of like no like she thinks of herself as she is that person that like is being like called for at the school or something. Yeah.
You know what I mean? Yeah. And I think she was probably mercilessly bullied herself.
You think? Yeah. And it's also I think when you have an exceptional gift like that and I always imagined her having parents who were made fun of and who couldn't hear the thing that she loved.
It's a really complicating thing. And it's all these little things that, because Todd is an amazing director, but also an amazing writer, is he put all these little clues in that she went, and she'd obviously spent a lot of time with the Shipibo Kinebo people taking ayahuasca.
Right. And if I'd had enough time, I would have done a little bit more research into that part of it.
But, you know, like she was really adventurous. And so she, you know, she did, she was running away from something herself.
And also coming out of COVID, I don't know what you guys did. You probably were able to continue the podcast, right? But if you couldn't do what you do, if you couldn't make music and you were Lydia Tarr for two years, what happens? Your creative turns destructive.
So, you know, I thought about all that stuff. We're talking about so many elements of a movie like this.
You know, obviously, like, huge respect for the director and it like real interest in incredibly dynamic character and this story that you can read in so many different ways. I wonder when you are embarking on something or you're sent a script, is there one of those elements, whether it's like the people you get to work with or the story itself or the specific character, is there something that you feel is what pulls you each and every time or is it different? I would imagine it's a combination, but for you, if you could speak to that.
You know, the couple of times early on when I accepted to do a script based on the role, it's always been slightly disappointing because it's like a theater script is called a play because you have to play with it it's it's not a work of literature and so it's always now for me about the director it's never the role yeah so because it doesn't matter you could be acting your socks off yeah but if the camera's in the wrong position or you know you haven't all been cast in the right way or you haven't been brought together by the director into an ensemble, the thing won't lift off. And so it won't mean anything to an audience.
And so, for example, with Black Bag, I'd worked with Stephen and when my husband and I were running the Sydney Theatre Company, he came in our first season and he wanted to do an all-male production of All About Eve, so he got obsessed with Nancy Grace and the Casey Anthony story

and he concocted

this bizarre

fascinating

theater piece

but when he

he called me

and said

he had a slot

and David Kemp

had written this great

ensemble piece

it was to work with him

and then of course

it was Fassbinder

and Tom Burke

who's an amazing

who I'm on stage with

and the Seagull

at the Barbican

in London

so it is

the director

and then

I'm fascinated

with who they want to cast

Thank you. who's an amazing who I'm on stage with and the seagull at the Barbican in London and so it is the director and then I'm fascinated with who they want to cast then.
Yeah, yeah. You've realized that more and more it is about the people.
Yes. It's not necessarily about which feels counterintuitive but it's not necessarily about the content and the primary way.
Yeah, it's not about the role. Yeah.
You know, because sometimes it's like, wow, you know, that's a piece of action or I haven't spoken to that audience before. Right.
Or, you know, that's a chamber piece or, you know, in fact, that character's really still. I've been moving around too much.
Yeah, I hear you. So sometimes, yeah, I don't know.
But I don't know that I necessarily want to do it anymore anyway. I think I want to spend time with my chickens in my gardens.
Really? You need a barn period. I knew, yeah.

With an occasional Berghain trip. Yes.

Yes. I will venture out to

Berghain from the barn. Come with.

Let's go. We're reading a book now

in the research. It's called Lost

and Sound, The Beginnings of Berghain

and the EasyJet set. So this writer

is kind of

putting out this theory that like with the introduction of EasyJet in Europe So this writer is kind of putting out this theory

that like with the introduction of EasyJet in Europe,

with budget travel within Europe,

that-

Oh, it eroded the integrity.

Not the integrity.

It just brought people to Berlin

and it created a nightlife capital in Berlin

after the wall went down.

I see, I see.

With techno coming out of Detroit,

it's like it all kind of aligned in a way

that like made it this magical, still magical thing that must be preserved because it's a cultural site now. It's considered a concert venue and not necessarily a club.
But you know, they have to be really careful. Having Thomas Ostermeyer, who runs the Schaubuner in Berlin, has directed this production of The Seagull.
He's such an amazing person and an amazing director. But they are, you know,

so many Australians are in Berlin

because you get to,

you don't have to apologize

for, you know, being a musician

or an actor or a painter

or a writer or whatever,

where you kind of do in Australia.

But he was saying,

like, cultural funding

is really going down.

And they don't,

it's such a,

it's a stupidity

from an economic point of view, let alone a cultural point of view. You know, you talk about culture on your podcast.
But because of the multiplier effect, it's the restaurants, it's the bars, it's the taxi drivers, it's the cyclos, it's all of those other things that actually suffer when you remove culture from a place. Apart from, you's why as you say that's why tourists go to berlin yeah yeah absolutely i feel like you have that in america too of like that apology of like hey yeah i'm an actor huh i'm i'm you know people think it's like people think it's like cool to shy away from there there's a certain sect of people i think that don't stand in like pride for being an artist i don't know maybe it's a self-consciousness.
Yeah, or, you know, there's a certain sect of people, I think, that don't stand in like pride for being an artist. I don't know.
Maybe it's a self-consciousness. Yeah.
Or, you know, there's a sense that somehow if you are in a creative profession, there's an indulgence. Yeah.
It's elite. And you go, no, it's like you're a member of a circus family.
Yeah. It's not.
It's true. You do it for an audience.
And that's where Soderbergh's so great

is he kept saying with Black Bag,

he's like, we're making a movie.

Yeah.

We're not making a film.

I want people to go and see this in the cinema

and eat their popcorn and have fun.

And it's witty and it's stylish.

It's like, you know, and then,

and you know, you don't have to,

not every piece of cinema has to have the same function

or reach the same audience. They're multifarious audiences, but it's foreign audiences.
I'm not doing it for myself. Just to speak, because you mentioned that we talk about culture.
We're going to ask you the question. It's a little bit of a, a little bit of a, you know, unifier on this podcast alongside this question, which is what was the culture that made you say culture was for you? Talking about like how you, Cate Blanchett, became Cate Blanchett.
If you could think about. I'm constantly becoming.
Yes. It could be something you found yesterday.
I'm transitioning constantly. I don't know.
Like I'm so eclectic. And, you know, I read Eden Blyton books.
I spend all the time on my bicycle thinking I was Nancy Drew or Trixie Belden. You're looking at me blankly because you're wet.
Tell us about Trixie Belden. Trixie Belden was a girl detective.
Yeah, as was Nancy Drew. Of course.
But I think there was a kind of an intersection for me of the royal wedding, Princess Diana and Charles, which was in 1980. At the moment, my grandmother was having a double bypass surgery.
Wow. So death was meeting sort of life and pageantry.
At the same time, the Moscow Olympics was on and I was obsessed. I did calisthenics, you know, like I'm not very strong when I'm bending.
Like I put my legs behind my heads. I have no skills, but I can do that.
Yeah, you have no skills. But that.
And I got really obsessed with, I don't know if this is culture, but I got very obsessed with ribbon dancing. Oh, that's certainly culture.
And then the dancing they do with the ball. Wow.
So maybe it was that. So we filed this under like, you know, the bending of it all, like rhythmic gymnastics it all like rhythmic gymnastics rhythmic gymnastics yeah I think that that was my high culture expression and then later on you saw Picasso painting with light and so that reminded me of my ribbon dancing obsession you know so yeah maybe it was ribbon dancing I'm thinking of your performance in the Curious Case of Benjamin Butt like it wasn't ribbon dancing.
I know, but a dancer. You know what I mean? Yeah, I've never forgiven Fincher.
He's so mean. We were doing, there was a dance sequence, which I rehearsed.
Did he cut it? For ages. No, no, no, it's in there.
I was going to say. But he decided to shoot it at five o'clock in the morning.
Oh, come on. Having been called, you know, because he shoots forever.
Having been called at like, you know, nine o'clock the previous morning, it's like, you asshole. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I don't know how much is me and how much is my body double. But I didn't get to ribbon dance in that.
No, not ribbon dancing, but I just... My age, there's not a lot of call.
They don't ask you to ribbon dance in We'll write you the ribbon dancing. Really? Yeah, we'll get you a ribbon dancing.
But the ball. Yeah, it's the ball.
It's so beautiful. What does the ball represent? You know, the girls in the Olympics who work with the ball and they move it around.
It's incredible. It's like water.
It's so magnificent. I don't even understand how you reverse it.
How do you do that? It's like magic. If you were to do magic tricks, like pull the ace of spades out of a lemon, I mean, I would literally pee my pants.
Right. What's crazy about that is the answers are so simple, but they're done with such precision.
What do you mean the answers are simple? Because the answer to how the card comes out of the lemon or whatever the hell. I don't want know but what i'm saying is we don't know and like for us it seems so crazy but their answers to that are so simple like the sleight of hand is so second nature yes i know but i'm still where do you put a lemon up i mean i know that's i mean i don't which hole which.
Don't touch the lemon. You don't want that.
But would you agree that like, have you ever applied this to your own sort of craft where you're like, I don't want to tell you too much about how I do things. I never want to talk about it because I don't know how I do it.
Do you not know? I don't have a process. Really? No.
Like people say, oh, you know, I do Meisner or Elise Strasner or I do, you know, Ute Hagen is my, whoever it is. I read it all.
I'm a bowerbird. If someone has done something great, I will steal it and use it.
Got it. Because you know it's always going to be reinterpreted through your lens.
So, yeah, I don't know. Every night before I start a new job, it's always the first day of school.

I'm always terrified. And I say to my husband, who's so bored with me asking the same questions over and over and over, I said, what do I do? What's my process? Really? Just show up.
And so you have to go into a room and go, I do not know how to do this. you humble yourself to the task.
And the material and the other actors and the directors and circumstances reveal what research you need to do. If you need to do any, sometimes you don't need to.
Sometimes you just have to be present. I feel like that's so comforting as an actor to hear even you say that, because there's like a freedom.
Terror. there's a freedom you can have to give yourself when you realize

this thing I have

about my anxieties,

about being

quote unquote good enough,

right for it.

I was going to ask you

how you are about moving on

because it sounds like

every actor has a different

relationship to that.

But to hear you speak to

not insecurity,

but like

any apprehension

or, you know,

nerves about doing something,

I think for even you

to say that,

you know,

it frees me.

And it gets worse, I think.

It gets worse.

You think?

Yeah, because

Thank you. any apprehension or, you know, nerves about doing something.
I think for even you to say that, you know, it's, it frees me. I think it gets worse.
Yeah, because then there's a sense that maybe people have preconceptions or expectations if you have some kind of a track record. And I think you have to risk, I'm sure you both feel this too, you have to, and particularly with standup, it's like you have to risk falling flat on your face.
And so if you're not, if you're not on that knife edge, you're not going to keep growing, you know? And so it is confronting, but you have to get yourself in the zone where you go, fuck it. Yeah.
Well, my thing with a lot of comedians, and I'm going to say it skews male, but a lot of male comedians seem to have this allergy to anything that is

theatrical about comedy.

And they have to understand that

stand-up is just theater. The schema

of it, of one person being on stage, talking

to a crowd of people, doesn't matter how big

the crowd is, or small,

it's theater.

And they are performing

the fact that these thoughts are coming to them off the cuff when they've been refining this routine for a long time over many experimental contexts. And it's like, let's just embrace that this is all kind of artificial.
And I don't know what my point is. I'm just saying like.
Yeah. And there's a structure to it.
It's like if you're telling a story, you forget the pivot point in the story, it's not going to work. But I've always found it really such an education to go and watch stand-up at the beginning when they're building the material.
Because in the end, I think the process is the most exciting thing. And sometimes when you get to the end point, the hard thing is to keep it fresh.
Right, right. you.
But, you know. And of course, then there's the thing of, you know, I've now done, I find this with a lot of stand-ups.
It's like you see people start to get insecure about having done things for several years. Right.
It's like, you know what I mean? It's because then it's less even about how do I keep this fresh? And you're like, did I get too comfortable with, am I too good at keeping it fresh? Am I not moving on and pushing myself to do something else? Yeah, well, I got great advice from a Hungarian director who directed us as a company and a production of Uncle Banya. And we'd had previews and they were all great.
And it was a really lovely company. And he came in and, you know, we rehearsed through an interpreter.
And so he said to his interpreter, he said, all of those amazing things that you did last night, they were wonderful. Tonight, opening night, don't do any of them.
Love it. And it was such great advice.
And you go, okay, this is, I think it's because they come from a culture where things sit in rep. And so he's interested in the long term health of the the show, not getting good reviews, you know, because often the good reviews are actually harder to deal with because certainly if you read them, you go, oh, that's a good bit and then it dies.
Right. You know, so you can't, you can't think about the good or bad bit.
You just have to think it's all a process. Right.
Or you just can't stay with it in any case because in comedy, they say,

like,

your act becomes your enemy.

It's like what you're talking about

where, like...

When you say your act,

you mean you shtick

or the thing.

Yeah.

Exactly.

And, like,

what you've given...

It's like,

I kind of feel that way now

with, like, SNL.

I'm like,

oh,

I'm playing another

inanimate object

and sometimes...

And I just want to say...

Sometimes in the biz at it.

Sometimes it's not

always up to

the cast member.

Right, of course.

You're being handed material like, okay, I guess you need me to play, play you know the spy balloon that got shot down okay like fine you know it's and then it becomes this thing that you're trying to pull away anyway this is not this is microcosmically compared to like anything that no because i mean this is the thing is you don't want to be thinking about yourself you want to be thinking about the energy that it's going out in your audience. And I think when you start to feel uncomfortable about that or habitual about that, then you become self-conscious and the thing's going to die anyway.
Which is why it's refreshing and also sort of speaks to your skill, besides putting your legs behind your head, is that like you have this, you have this, you amalgamate all these things in your process to the point where you don't have one, which is perfect. Yeah.
I mean, look, I do like having a task that I feel is impossible to save for something like Tar. I thought, I don't know how to read a score.
I learned piano as a girl, but I have to break this score apart and choose the bits that we're going to play and I really have to learn how to do this.

And so in a way,

the part was so overwhelming.

It's not a film about conducting,

as I said.

But it gave me something to do

to stave off the anxiety

because I had so much to prepare.

Yeah, lots of homework.

So it's just,

I think in the end,

process is a way of staving off anxiety

which can make you clam.

Yeah. We love LA.
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All episodes streaming April 4th on Hulu. This is a little bit of a left turn, but have you seen O'Mary on Broadway? No, I haven't.
I have to tell you, in getting to know you a little bit now I think that like you are going to absolutely love it yes everyone I know who's seen it has loved it next time you're in New York I've now seen it with three different Marys I've seen it with Coloscolla I've seen Hannah Solo the understudy and two nights ago we saw Betty Gilpin who was fantastic and it's just and different every time every time and it's just it's just really interesting to see something start as that off-Broadway moment and then no Cole was doing it and to now see an actress like Betty doing it it's just it's the interpretation is like it's ever evolving I just think you have such an amazing sense of humor you would absolutely love this I don't know how long you're in town it's such a no, no, well. Yeah, right.
You're doing your thing. I just came in to see you guys.
And we're so happy. It was worth that we canceled a show at the bar again in London.
But I'm so happy. Okay, so it might be time to do I Don't Think So Honey, which is our 60-second segment where we take something in pop culture that really needs to get pummeled into the ground.
Yes. You know, and I have something.
Okay. It's sort of been popping up for years now and I would like to...
It's disturbing you. I can tell you rubbing your forehead.
Yeah, that was my tell. That's your white sneaker.
Let's go. All right.
This is Matt Rogers. I don't think so when he's time starts now.
I don't think so, honey. Buddy.
One of my buddies. I got a buddy who...
Let me tell you something, buddy, like, maybe it's the

consonants, the B and the D.

I don't think... Frickative.

It's too frickative, and I was going to use the word frickative.

Maybe it's not even frickative. A buddy

if you're not a buddy? Yeah, my thing is

just like, it feels like something,

and it's been used sexually a couple times with me

amongst gay men when I...

When my white sneakers were really popping off,

and I don't like it there.

I don't know what it is. 30 seconds.

It feels like when you use the word buddy, you're not

Thank you. when my white sneakers were really popping off and I don't like it there.
I don't know what it is. It feels like when you use the word buddy, you're not saying friend.
It feels like something we're backing off or trying too hard. It's an active aggression.
Yes. Yeah, it's an active aggression, the use of the word buddy, or it's just not committing to what it is.
It's my close friend. It's my, you know, I think some people, especially the gay guys I've been having sex with, I'm your lover.
Okay. Call me something else, not buddy.
It's like when someone calls you dude. Five seconds.
And that's very fricative as well, we think, maybe. D&D.
Dude and buddy, I'm just not feeling it. I think we should say, like, I think we should just use our words with more intention.
Because buddy, it's existing in a gray area. I don't think so, honey.
And that's one minute. You know, do you use buddy? I do say dude a bit.
Dude is okay for you. Is it for a straight white woman to say dude? I think dude is fine.
I have less of a problem with it. It's not my favorite.
I guess what I'm saying is when gay guys, I'm going out with my buddy. Yeah.
What am I to you? Yeah. Where do I exist? Because buddy isn't like it's existing in an area between acquaintance and friend.
I never thought about it. I don't like it.
This is an educational podcast. This is an educational podcast.
Friend. I'm going to put a theory out there.
The English language is sort of limited in the kind of words we have for friend. Buddy.
I don't like when someone's like, five times out of ten, I'm going to say. Half the time.
Half the time. When someone says, hey friend, I go, huh? Like I shudder a bit.
Well, hey, no, here's what I'm saying. It's not, it's less.
Hey anything. Hey you, hey buddy, hey friend.
It's like, hello. Hello.
Excuse me. I'd rather you say exqueeze me.
Exqueeze me is back now as a result of you saying it. It's the same kind of weird.
We haven't found the right word yet that feels right on the tongue. For what? For friend.
For friendship. In the same way that we don't have the good words for marijuana.
Weed, pot. Yeah, but I like reefer.
Doobie, reefer. Yeah.
Yeah. I don't know.
But what would you say? In what context are you calling someone a friend or a buddy or a mate or a pal? I think I got triggered. I like pal.
I like pal. I like mate too.
Mate is fun. Mate is just, it's not.
Not in Australia. It's just so overused.
Is it really? Mate, get out of here. Mate.
I don't know. But maybe the way you say it, it's probably not so bad.
I've got some mates in time. I mean, it doesn't sound right.
But you know, don't you think, lover is such a kind of... Yeah, I don't like it.
I feel like it's taking your shirt off in an inappropriate way. It's too intimate.
At a dinner. But sweetheart, I think my sweetheart is really nice.
And my friends make fun of me. I say, thank you, my love.
I love that. At restaurants, I say my love.
I call a lot of people my love and our friend Jared is always like, I want to die when you say it. And I'm like, well, that's how I feel about buddy.
I love my love. But you wouldn't call away to buddy.
Or if you did, so I was in the service industry for 10 years. I've done hard yards.
Getting called buddy, it feels degrading. Maybe that's what I'm picking up on.
Yes. It's a post-trauma.
Yes. You haven't recovered from your waiting time.
I think this, we stumbled upon it. It's that.
It feels like a little bit of a put down or like, or it feels like that's maybe what I'm getting at with it, that it feels non-committal. You know what I mean?

It's just, there's something punched down about it. It's Pat.

It's Pat. It's simply

Pat. It's simply Pat.

It's interesting. Fascinating.
I don't know. Yeah, I just

needed to walk that through. And I'm happy we did

here today. Okay, so this is Bowen

Yang's. I don't think, Swanee, did you come from here today?

I did. And this has been brewing

for several years as well. We're really unearthing a lot today.
This ended up being therapy. So this is Bowen Yang's I don't think so honey.
His time starts now. I don't think so honey.
Hakuna Matata. No worries for the rest of your days.
Privileged. I'm worried.
It's not even a privileged thing. It's a detachment from the human condition which is to experience experience stake experience some kind of investment in the future and how can you be invested in the future if you're not worried a little bit about losing the thing that you want about letting go of desire it feels too Buddhist too aggressively Buddhist which is not what is, which is anathema to Buddhism in the first place.
You can't be an aggressive Buddhist. To say no worries for the rest of your days, to be that absolute about not worrying, something's off.
15 seconds. You're numbing yourself too much to circumstance, to what life throws at you.
You're going to be worried because guess what? Everyone

in this room, I'm looking at you, Vahid, Matt behind the camera, we're all worried. You have something to worry about.
You all have something to worry about. They're pretending not to be, but they're worried.
Also, not for nothing, they were a warthog and a groundhog. What were the meerkats? A meerkat.
Thank you. In Africa, you have worries.
You've got worries. There are predators all around

you. Be worried.
Stay

vigilant in

these streets and And by these streets, I do mean the prairie lands. The prairie lands.
The jungles. Yes, in this red room.
Stay on your toes. Be afraid.
Be very afraid. Hakuna Matata, I think not.
It's real culture number 14. Hakuna Matata, I think not.
I loved that, Bowen. Thank you.
It's from the heart. Yeah.
We were told that you came prepared as well. I'm meant to have one.
I'm not going to be as eloquent as you are. That's okay.
But I have something, I have a lot of things that really, you know, what's the first bit I have to say? You say, I don't think so, honey. I don't think.
I don't think so, honey. Okay.
This thing. And we're going to put the timer up, but I think you should feel unbounded by this.
Okay. Unboard.
I don't think so honey timing. I don't think so honey.
Hakuna Matata in terms of this. In terms of this.
My blood pressure's just gone up. Okay.
We're just going to put it up just for ceremony. Okay.
This is Kate Blanchett's I don't think so honey. Her time starts now.
I don't think so, honey, leaving the toilet seat up.

And I am not talking about the lid.

I am talking about the thing that you sit on.

Of course.

In a domestic setting, men may think, or people with penises may think that their aim is good.

No.

But it is all over the seat.

And I have to put that thing down.

Because in the end, everyone sits down more than they stand up.

100%.

And when you are, you know,

Thank you. over the seat and I have to put that thing down because in the end, everyone sits down more than they stand up.
And when you are at, you know, somebody else's house and you and it's not only the pee that goes onto the seat, it's little bits of hair. And you think I want to touch that? You think I want to smell that? And so I have to put it down and then I put the seat down and then the whole thing comes up and it starts all over again.
And if you are in a public bathroom, it's like I am going to invest in a she-wee because, do you know what a she-wee is? Oh my God. It's a cup with a little tube on it that women use for going for a bush wee when they're camping.
Oh, and I don't want to have to spend money just because people who need to put the, should be putting the seat down can't pee straight.

Right.

Oh my God.

Yeah.

So it's my whole thing is the toilet seat thing.

And I have, I live in a household with three boys and my husband and each of them say, I always put it down, which is almost more in rate.

They lie.

Lies.

That's the plot of Black Bag.

And that's one minute.

There's a traitor.

There's a traitor in your midst. Yeah.
But you're gonna defend yourself no I'm not defending I don't wanna hear your defense because it is not true I'm not defending myself I'm actually but I'm self I'm sort of self-owning when I say it's always so jarring this is the thing about living alone I'm going well that's. I got to get mad at myself.
Yeah. But do you find yourself getting mad at yourself if you go, well...
I don't shed. Yeah.
But you can't control that, can you? Oh, yeah. No, yeah.
Years of work. I am Taurus, Taurus, Taurus.
I told you that before I came in. Oh, my God.
I'm very controlling. Hair, stay in there.
Stay in there. I can't stand going to someone else's bathroom and when they're okay with

hair being all over the toilet.

I am essentially

like a top level

cleaner whenever I have anyone coming over.

I make sure I put

muscle into it. I know, but do you put the lid down?

Always. Yes.

Yes. I want photographic

evidence. That's what my husband said.

And he said, come on, just leave me alone. It's 6 in the morning morning I do put it down and I go to the toilet and it's like do I take a we've been married 27 years and we are still married because I just had to let it go and I tried to teach my boys but I realized they're even imprinted on my husband so I failed as a a parent.
No, no, certainly not.

I have, I have, I have.

No, no, no.

I'm exposing my sons in a way

that I probably shouldn't be.

We don't know which of the sons.

Yeah.

All of them.

Well, you've now specified.

Yeah.

So there we go.

All of them.

You can ask us for photographic evidence.

You as a mother,

this is your success as a mother

is that you're not asking

photographic evidence of them. No.
You would never make them take them. It's true.
I don't shame them. Right.
No. But they do get the passive aggressive every time I go to the bathroom.
My thing is, and I'll reveal this, and I bet you'll agree, the older I get, I'm sitting down to pee more anyway. If I'm at home, I'm sitting.
Because I do have male friends who sit down out of deference to their friends of all sexual situations and orientations. I'm going to sit down because I'm not going to miss if I sit down.
The risk becomes exponentially less when you are, when, quite frankly, your dick is already in the bowl. Exactly.
And if you don't have a dick, you know, your hole's in the bowl. Your hole's in the bowl.
Honestly. It's a win-win.

This is huge. And with that.

You can cut that out. My mother's

going to listen. Sorry, Mom.

Sorry, Mom. No, and

this is good for us for Berghain because there's

the piss goblin there. There's probably a hole-in-the-bowl

room. There's a hole-in-the-bowl room.

You know, we're all going to be sitting.

I'm sitting on the piss goblin.

Okay. And I won't get I will not get photographic evidence of that.
No, you can't be sitting. I'm sitting on the piss goblin.
Okay.

And I will not get photographic evidence of that.

No, you can't.

I'll get the descriptor.

Absolutely.

We'll fill you in.

Have fun.

Thank you.

We're going to have the best time

just like we did today.

This was so amazing to have you.

It's such an honor.

It's so great to meet you

and you really are

just one of the best

and this has just been so lovely.

One of the best.

Well, would you...

Is that like calling me

your friend? Would you... Hey, buddy.
You're one of the best, then this has just been so lovely. One of the best? Well, would you...
Is that like calling me your friend?

Would you...

Hey, buddy, you're one of the best.

Listen, buddy, you're one of the best.

No, you're meant to say to every guest,

you're the best.

You are the greatest of all time.

And they leave feeling good about themselves.

Oh, my God.

And the next one comes in,

you are the best.

You are the best.

Like, you two are.

Undisputed.

You're the undisputed best.

Oh, really? We named an award after you, for God's sake. I know.
Kate Blanch. Undisputed.
You're the undisputed best. Oh, really?

We named an award after you for God's sake.

I know.

Kate Blanchett award for good acting.

I know.

It was named after you.

I was so chuffed.

And confused.

I can understand.

When we sent those ass down,

we're like,

are they going to have any reference for this?

And then the fact that you went out and did it,

we were like,

thank you for the commitment.

Bless you.

Well, we end up very upset with the song.

We sure do.

I wish we only had, we're in orchestra right now. We can play and be conducted.
Second cello. Let's see.
Boy, you got my heartbeat running away. Beating like a drum and it's coming your way.
Oh, I feel like boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. You get that harmony there and it didn't work.
It's okay. We'll get it next time.
Thanks. Bye.

Las Cultures is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeartRadio Podcasts. Created and hosted by Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang.
Executive produced by Anna Hosniay. Produced by Becca Ramos.
Edited and mixed by Doug Baehm and Monique Laborde. And our music is by Henry Komerski.
We love LA. What do you love about Los Angeles? How about the food and drink options? Los Angeles chefs and mixologists draw inspiration from their varied cultural backgrounds in the city's diverse neighborhoods, making for exciting food scene.
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No matter what happens, you'll have a dinner plan that everyone loves with stouffers. Some chicken enchiladas or a cheesy chicken and broccoli pasta bake is always welcome whether it is plan A or plan D-licious.
Not gonna lie, I eat the lasagna once a week, and that's a fact. When the clock strikes dinner, think Stouffer's.
Shop now for family favorites. Are your money skills total trash? Well, trust me, you are not alone.
Personal finance ignorance is as American as apple pie, but you can improve. Think, Matt, if your emergency fund was invested, especially given the volatility we're experiencing right now.
Ouchies. Investing, it is ultimately a necessity, but you got to keep that emergency fund accessible.
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Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Pod of Rebellion, our new Star Wars Rebels rewatch podcast.
I'm Vanessa Marshall, voice of Harrison Dula Specter 2. I'm Tia Zerkar, Sabine Wren, Specter 5.
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Each week, we're to re-watch and discuss an episode from the series and share some fun behind-the-scenes stories. Sometimes we'll be visited by special guests like Steve Bloom voices Zabarelio Spectre 4 or Dante Bosco voice of Jai Kel and many others.
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