Side Stories: Movie Stories II

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the place to find a place there's no place to escape to this is the last podcast on the left

side stories that's when the cannibalism started. Side stories.
Yes. We don't normally do this directly after Good Pud.
Yeah, I like how yucky I feel. I never thought that we would...
Well, just because I consumed... How was the deviled egg pudding? I wanted to die a very quick death.
You know what was really nice about it, honestly? I feel like I want it. You would like it.
I should have said you would like it. We threw it out, just some of the smell.
But it was the... The smell was pretty horrific.
But it was just, like, honestly, a more egg-forward mayonnaise. Okay.
Which, that sounds like a nightmare, I think, to a lot of people. But then we tried bacon soda.
Mayonnaise is made out of eggs. See, that's the thing, and you'd think like, oh, it's just going to be like you're eating a bunch of mayonnaise, which, don't get me wrong, we all love to do, but it is, but like, add a bunch of the taste of hard-boiled eggs to it.
It was awesome. Yeah, it sounds, yeah, you're talking like, exactly.
You like deviled eggs, though. This is what I'm saying.
This is the problem. It was, essentially,, you could take that pudding and you could put it in the shell of a hard-boiled egg and it would taste just like a deviled egg.
Yeah, and that makes me want to cry to death. Deviled eggs could have been an alternate title for Rosemary's Baby.
Hey! Now that is an intellectual film-based joke. Oh my god, is that all we're doing here today? Because I am not prepared.
Today is Intellectuals. Welcome to Side Stories.
I'm your host, Henry Zabrowski. I'm sitting here with Ed Larson.
I'm smart! Oh, you know when he dog barking, you know he's smart. I'm smart dog! I'm smart dog! He's got that dog in him.
He's got that dog. I'm scared of him.
And we have our film correspondent, the tiny-headed, big-mouthed Jackie Zabrowski. I've got a little head.
I've got a big mouth. Tiny-head, big-mouthed.
Hugh, here's the thing. Henry's been telling me, and I'm not going to use the phrase gaslighting, but Henry's been telling me I have a small head my entire life.
And then I went to get my head measured, and I actually have a medium-sized head. Nice.
I got a big one. Thank you.
Yeah, you do have a big head. It's not a big head.
No, it's not like too big. No, not you.
I'm talking about her. Oh, yeah.
It's a small head. It's not a small head.
It's a normal-sized head. You got a small head.
You do have a little head. Yeah.
That's why I'm not as famous as I should be. Yes, because everyone knows that famous people have gigantic heads.
That is actually, that is the truth. Humphrey Bogart probably died younger than he should have because of the size of his head.
DiCaprio's got a huge head. Jack Black's got a huge fucking head.
A huge noggin. Brad Pitt's got a huge noggin.
They're all tiny with Mike Myers, dude.

These are all dudes.

Mike Myers is a giant head.

Well, yeah, of course.

He's a heavy dude.

Well, ladies, what's weird about ladies is that they are all literally the size of Hot Pockets.

Yeah.

Every famous woman.

I saw what's her name?

What's her?

She's pretty.

Kate Blanchett.

No, she'll never let me near her.

Kate Winslet.

No, she has several orders against me.

Kate Beckinsale. Also doesn't want me near her.
It's what's her name with the big wide eyes. See, we're looking at pictures right now.
No, who's got the eyes on either side of her head? That's Brandy. Emma Stone.
No. Anya Taylor-Joy.
That's the one. Oh, yeah.
She's got a hammerhead shark head. She's very small.
I know, but she's sexy. It's a sexy shark.
But she's so tiny-like. It's almost like when you see them in real life, they look like little baby people.

Yeah, but that's why I like her exaggerated features.

I feel like that's what really seduces you.

She does look like an emoji.

That's why she's good on camera.

So today's episode.

Furiosa was cool.

It was good.

It was good.

I liked it.

It was like a chapter.

Surprisingly fantastic term by Chris Helmsworth.

I'm very impressed.

Oh, he was very good in it.

I want to see more.

I never thought I would say the words, I want to see more from to see more from him seriously i did not think that he would be good but today what we are doing because this is the spooky season i said we have been charged with the seminal holiday task of 31 for 31 that is 31 horror films for the 31 days of October, and we wanted to do a bit of a roundup of what we've seen. Yeah, we haven't watched all of them yet.
We have not watched them. It's still in the middle of the month.
I'm so curious as to how you guys came up with your list because I follow a rubric every year where I have to like fulfill different topics and themes to help me make sure that my list is varied. I'm going to do that.

Our list is pretty varied.

It's pretty varied, but I love what you did, Jackie, because Jackie does have each day

as its own specific bracket, like its own specific horror, which also shows how many

subgenres are within horror films.

Here, just list off a bunch just up the top.

We even change some of them year to year. You can go through the different generations

like 50s or earlier, 60s, 70s, 80s.

But then there's sci-fi horror, queer

horror, zombies, a Wes

Craven film, a Friday

the 13th film. Any kind of

scary kids, whether

they are the bad ones or something bad

happens to the kids. And they gave you the movie Them.

Sure. Which is scary kids.

Very scary kids. Do you know that the diner in Nightmare in LJ4 is called The Craven.
Really? A little, a little, I'm sorry to interrupt, but a little factoids. I love factoids.
It's one of my favorite. I love, man, bring back pop-up video.
Pop-up video. That's why I love Joe Bob Briggs.
Pop-up movie. Yes, that's why I love Joe Bob.
I mean, that's just me at home with my computer open while I watch a movie. Which is usually what I do.
I know, but that's the thing. But then I get invested and I miss important shit today.
No, because you're making the producers pick and choose what they're going to tell you about the facts. I was doing that.
I was watching Frankenhooker today and I started looking at my phone to see who the actors are and I almost missed the giant pile of tits. You just never do that.
Frankenhooker was so much fun. Frankenhooker's amazing.
I'd never seen it before, but I know we'll get into it. It's my last Hennenlotter movie, I think.
Although I haven't seen Basket Case 3. Have you seen Bad Biology? Yes.
We watched it for Adam Wurtz's Bachelor Party. Oh, that's right.
Yeah, it was a lot of fun. It was a good Bachelor Party.
A long time ago. What excites me about the different topics, though, like, for instance, vampire.

I'm like, I've seen all the vampire movies.

But then I looked into the newer vampire movies that came out.

And there's one I have not heard of it at all called Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting

Suicidal Person.

Apparently, it is a dark comedy about a vampire that is just trying to like ethically be a vampire

but it's supposed to be really good.

It's a very indie film.

And a lot of times with indie films

the only problem is that they just do stuff like

they don't have any horror effects.

Yeah, they have no horror effects.

But I'm okay with that though.

I think it's fun sometimes

when you put into that box

and you gotta figure it out.

Blair Witch Project shows

that you'd need $10,000 to make a fucking movie. Terrifier 2 was only made for $250,000.
Terrifier 1, $35,000. Are we going out the gate talking about Terrifier? Because I watched all three Terrifiers this week for the first time.
Just hold one second before we go into any of these. I just want to make sure up top, because of how many screaming

angry emails

we get about this topic, is

there is going to be some light

spoilerage throughout the

rest of this episode. It is going to be

light. We're not going to talk about

Terrifier 3.

I think that came out in 2024.

VHS Beyond, we won't get too into.

We will not talk about that. We will not talk about anything that came out this year.
Maybe Joker 2, only just because we hate them. And we can talk about the new Salem's Lot, too.
I haven't seen the new Salem's Lot. I've found most recent.
Yeah, it is. I haven't seen it yet.
I have not seen it because it's on my list. It's not on my list.
Our list, please. It was on my list, though.
All right, so we are going to talk about what we've all seen. Now, maybe we can, I think Terrifier is a good thing to start with because Terrifier 1 to me is an example of a great return to form of old school horror iconography.
Now, one thing about Terrifier 1 is that it's definitely not complete and it is definitely uneven. But the thing that stands out for me with Terrifier 1 is obviously Art the Clown.
What do you mean it's not complete? Yeah, why don't you think it's complete? Well, just because it feels thin compared to what Terrifier 2 would then be called. Well, there's no plot.
But I like that there's no plot. I like that there's no...
It's just chaos. ...that there's no lore about Art the Clown.
Oh, sure. But that's why I'm saying it's amazing as a first chapter.
Yes. I think that the fact that they went on to...
I think that if it came out, Terrifier 1 came out and there was no sequel, we would eventually forget about that film. Yeah.
But I think that Terrifier 2, with the addition of the lore, the blowing out of the story, mixed with a little bit more money, Terrifier 2, it's also the performer. The guy who plays Art is arguably the best physical actor in horror right now outside of, what, the super skinny guy.
Super skinny guy. Doug Jones.
Doug Jones. He is, David Howard Thornton is unbelievable.
He is, I really didn't think I was going to like Terrifier at all. Me neither.
Terrifier 2 blew my mind again. I can't believe how much I enjoyed the first and the second one because I thought, beforehand, I thought this was all torture porn.
And again, It is. It is.
It's not torture though. It's not.
It's mutilation. I think it's schlocky, big violence, and I think that's very different than torture porn.
You know what, Jackie, I think that you're right, because hostile, like, I don't like hostile. Hostile sucks.
Yeah, I don't like hostile because it's not for me. And I look like the bad guy from Hostile, too, and people yell at me in the street.
You do look like him, and I'm worried. Oh, I'm sorry.
Yeah. It's what are you going to do You know what I mean? People yell at me.
Where's the girl? What are you talking about? Where's the girl? Let me see the girl. Find me.
I pay money for girl. Every single time we go anywhere, and there's a picture of a warthog, if there's a picture of a fat, bald man with a mustache, we are it.
So it doesn't matter. And they go, why you think it's me? It's all the same.
It's all the same to us. But Terrifier, like, it really it really like I feel that we miss the horror icon and with Terrifier 2 that's why I was like I realized watching it this time because we went and watched a double feature last night which is one of the first times I've seen one of those in a long time I had so much fun doing this with you guys it was fun it was a blast we were watching Terrifier at a 1 o'clock in the goddamn morning.
Yeah, because we watched Terrifier 2 and Terrifier 3 back to back, but all of us the night before separately had watched the original Terrifier. Just to make sure we were locked in.
But it shows how, like, I love that he set a bunch of Easter eggs in Terrifier 1 that then developed in Terrifier 2. Yes! Yeah, I don't know if he wrote that in Terrifier 1 or just figured he'd expand on it, which seemed like to me.
I want to say something about Terrifier 1. All right, I have a theory, because low-budget filmmaking, we've been a part of it plenty of times.
Oh, certainly. All right, so you know the old, you know the crazy lady in the basement of the house in Terrifier 1? Yes.
With Emily the doll? Yes. I believe that that baby doll was originally written as a baby and they couldn't afford it.
And they couldn't get a real baby. And they're like, fuck it.
She's crazy. She's crazy.
She's got a doll. I love that, dude.
Also, she was a beautiful woman for how insane and houseless she was supposed to be. I was just like, man, she seems's doing okay.
She was a good actor but he openly says Damien Leone like as I was reading about his process was that it seemed like his whole thing was about capturing inspiring moments at the time. So he said like stuff with Art the Clown well there's one spoiler he was talking about Terrifier 3.
The Terrifier terrifying one we could spoil we can't but there was one example he used of talking with the with art and being like okay let's do xyz they were doing a together like an experimentation of what we do with this character and how we react and you would let him run wild and do stuff and then kind of like they would find and source the sequences as they went. Cause like, so one of the best parts about the movie, I think the reason why it transcends from torture porn into something else is, was the, the stripe of humor that runs throughout the entire thing that breaks attention.
Yes. Yes.
Because you also heard movies,, I would say. But then I would say that the last 20 minutes of the third one is the most brutal of the entire series.
Very upsetting. You think so? The last 20 minutes of Terrifier 3...
I think because you actually care at that point a little bit. Maybe it was just because I was five hours in and I was desensitized by that point.
You know, I didn't give a fuck. But it's really...
It gets pretty bleak at the end of Terrifier 3, but it's awesome because it does end on a cliffhanger. I will say that, which is pretty crazy.
Now, have you guys seen All Hallows Eve, which is apparently where Art the Clown originally shows? Different dude. He's a different guy.
Oh, okay. Different actor.
And he says, as a matter of fact, the original, the makeup he wore in Terrifier 2 was based on the original guy, which is why it fit him weirdly for a long time. And now he got it all redone for three, so it's more malleable.
The original Arthur Clown in All Hallows Eve, honestly, was kind of fucking, I was not, I'm not a huge fan of All Hallows Eve. It's a bit off.
We'll have to put it on the list next year, because it's definitely a Halloween movie. Very much so.
But I think it's... I just think it's...
Is it as brutal? No, because it's an anthology series. So it's got stuff in it.
I just find it... But I love an anthology series, though.
It's very, very... It's very empty.
Yeah, so it started with the Ninth Circle, which was the short film with Art the Clown. So the makeup was a thing that's been traveling with Damien Leone throughout all of these projects.
But it didn't have, I'm assuming, the same mime work. They elevated it all the way up.
They probably just got a better actor with it. You also notice in Terrifier 1, the comedy is way subtler.
Well, there's hardly any comedy. Anything that could be comedy in Terrifier 1 is just upsetting.
Because he only does a couple of laugh stingers. He kind of does a couple a little bit, but largely he is a gruesome, frightening clown.
But again, why Terrifier 2? It's climbing up the ranks of one of my favorite sequels. I feel like it's very rare when you find that the direct sequel is better than the first one.
Yeah. I wouldn't say it's better, but I really also liked it a lot.
See, I think it's way better. I think it's way better.
I think it's better across the board. I think I was more just shocked that I liked the first Terrifier so much that, you know, when you go into something thinking you're not going to like it, and then you're like, when you're so happily surprised that I was like, oh my god.
I would definitely, now I get, I feel like in the past I didn't understand

as someone that goes to a lot of

horror cons with my husband

who makes horror artwork,

I feel like there's so many

people that have tattoos.

Check out Crudink! There's so many people that have

tattoos of Art the Clown and stuff like that

and I never really got

that because you don't see as much

with, let's say, a jigsaw or something

like that. See, I don't think I want him on a t-shirt.

I don't, yeah. I want Freddie on a t-shirt

I'm't. I want Freddie on a T-shirt.
I want Michael Myers on a T-shirt. Jason, maybe.
But it's just too upsetting, I think. I will say is that I was hesitating.
This is so funny. As a T-shirt hoarder and a person that also views my T-shirts as like my expressions of my stuff.
Yeah. This is the first time.
And I was sitting there at the middle of terrifier three. I was like, I think it's time I'm going to get an art, the clown shirt.
Wow. Ready for it.
He's entering into the lexicon. I'm kind of mad they weren't selling them at the theater.
I would have bought one if they were selling them. But I was watching, I was like, this is, he is legitimately become a new favorite character of mine because of the, that's why, it was like

Terrifier 2 feels like

Elm Street 3, and Terrifier 3

feels like Elm Street 4. It's like

very similar vibes, and they're very

similar. I love the soundtrack.
I love

the entire atmosphere,

and there's just something about

Art the Clown

just having a good time.

And he's always having a good time.

He's just having a good time. All of the stuff that he does is simply for his own enjoyment.
You know what's interesting is every scene is brutal, right? Every scene's brutal, but it's like a different style of horror every time. Because one time it's like a horror comedy.
And then it just goes to fucking straight up up sorority murder. And then it goes to like you know, and it just moves.
It transcends genres inside of the horror genre, which is really fun. It adds layers.
It feels like he's creating you. It's also one of the first times honestly that I've seen a final girl that I felt that connection to.
Can we find her name real quick? She was fantastic because also Kate Corcoran was in Terrifier 1. After interviewing her and hanging out with her, what was her name? Lauren Lavera.
Lauren Lavera. Unbelievable job.
But Kate Corcoran, we interviewed her during the pool party, the LPM pool party. I interviewed her.
She was very lovely and I didn't enjoy watching her get a kiss. I not know how she died, and I was very surprised.
I will say I like watching my friends get murdered on camera. I think it's fun.
I think it's fun as hell. Because everybody that's ever been in those movies, they love getting killed.
Although, I don't know. I know someone that was in one of those movies and said, Wow, you were just naked and being hung from a place for quite some time.
Yeah, Natalie did it. She's like, that's one of those things.
It's a part of the pain that you're supposed to feel of the whole thing. It's fun.
It's difficult, but it's difficult to do. It's physically difficult.
Yes. It's difficult to be very, very good at.
And Lauren Lavera is really killing this series. But I was sad because, honestly, what I texted you guys this morning, I genuinely had a bad dream last night with the little girl clown that is in Terrifier 2.
Yeah, that's the best one. That little girl clown creeped me the fuck out and I genuinely had a nightmare about it last night.
That little girl is so good. So good.
She's so good in it. Terrifier 2 is really good did have fun with Terrifier 3, and I like that it's, I always have a soft spot for a Christmas horror movie.
Oh, me too. I think if I rewatch any of them, it'll be Terrifier 3.
Yes. Really? Yeah, yeah.
Versus Terrifier 2. Well, I'd watch the second one again.
I think Terrifier 2 is like, it's my favorite of them. It is just like, if I can be honest, I really enjoyed it.
It's very good. It's a good horror movie.
The story is actually good. It's good.
It's just hard to watch bodies get ripped apart like that. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. It is just like, they don't shy away from showing you anything.
That's why I like it. And it's just like, okay, we're just gonna take the jaw off the face.
But I also like, and yet though he's not above. Eddie did such a good job, we were sitting in the last row.
It was a couple of times when I just hear him go like, ah, ah, ah. And I was like, Eddie, you're so strong.
Yeah. You're doing so good.
Yeah. But like, I've watched horror movies my entire life.
You know, it's not like it's new to me. This is just, it's just so brutal.
No, but again, I like that he's not above just pulling out a gun. I think that's also fun.
That flipped me out. I was so surprised.
I've never seen a slasher fucking just all of a sudden pop, pop, pop, pop. That's the best part.
But I was like, he's an equal opportunity killer. He's a, again, he is a chaos agent.
He reminds me of Freddy Krueger. He reminds me of that same thing.
Thank you for not brutally showing children being murdered as someone that that does actually kind of make me nauseous. I know.
But not holding back on killing children. Killing children.
I think it's awesome. It's a happy medium.
It's a happy medium. I love watching children get killed on film.
And I think that it's fun when you show that Art the Clown does not give a fuck. And it's like, because what I also love is that.
That was my favorite part in Looper when he fucking killed that kid. Oh, yeah.
Well, Terrifier 3 apparently finally got a chance for him to get some huge, huge budgets. And there's an opening sequence of Terrifier 3 that apparently made everyone say no.
Everybody said no. And I was just like, when I watched it, I was like, this is my film.
Terrifier 3 and Terrifier 2. Terrifier 3, more than Terrifier 2, I felt like there was stuff that they had to leave out in order to release the film.
In which one? In Terrifier 3. I feel like there was full scenes removed.
No, buddy. Fully independently.
Really? He made it completely independently. That man's free.
Damien Leone has figured out... Well, I'm talking about for the MPAA.
It's not rated NC-17. It's rated R, right? What is it? It might be rated...
It might be unrated. Oh.
I don't know. Not rated.
Not rated. Oh, yeah.
It's unrated. It's completely independent.
Wow, not rated. That's what's fucking awesome, is that they got to do whatever they wanted.
I didn't know you could do that. Oh, yeah.
I honestly didn't. I never thought about that.
You just don't get certain support. He probably can't go get it nominated for things, but then that's whatever.
He doesn't fucking give a shit. Yeah, he's not looking to get it nominated.
But we have to. That's just where, like, I will defend this to my deathbed, which is what he does right is the fact that he goes so over, over, over the top.

Because I do think that there is, like, Natalie and I talk about, like, one of our main issues with essentially torture porn is when it's realistic and not entertaining.

When it literally is just torturing someone in a realistic fashion and

it's just crying and screaming and there's nothing else going on this is not realistic no no he grabs somebody because the thing is you realize it's all supernatural violence there are things that you're doing that humans can't do even in terrifier one we talked about how when they do that very famous kill of kate where they hang her upside down naked and split her in half where it's Like, that is ludicrous.

And so on that level, while it's a horrific sight, it's also so, so over the top. You're just like, it really it's art.
The clown. Come on! Fuck you! I will say, when he did can we talk about that scene for two seconds from Terrifier 1? Yeah.
Sure, yeah. Yeah, because it's old enough now.
Yeah. You know, like, so she was hung up, slept down, and cut vagina first in half with a, with a- Chainsaw.
Not a chainsaw. Oh, no, a handsaw.
Yeah, a handsaw. That's right.
I honestly felt like it was too quick. Well, that would take more time.
That would take, like, 20 minutes. But that's why I explained to you is that that's why it's okay.
It's because legitimately they split the person in half quickly to show you how impossible it would be. It is not in any way realistic.
You know what I mean? It could not happen that way. The way it is happening is like it's entirely essentially comical.
Yeah. No, no, no.
We're watching it right now. And you can see, we're looking at Terrifier 1, you can really see how much worse the makeup is too, right? Isn't that crazy? Well, and then you think about...
Well, they got more money. I'm going to say a scene that I'm going to assume is like an homage to this scene that happens in Terrifier 3.
You can tell definitely the difference then because of all the closer up shots of the sawing motions through the body part that it was sawing through. Also, Damien Leone does the makeup.
He does it all. Really? He had help in three.
In three, he had help. Okay, yeah.
But that's so impressive to me. Well, that's the reason why I believe two took four years to make.
No. Yeah, it took like 2018.
I don't think it came out until. And people were complaining because it was too long.
But as someone that watched it late at night, I didn't think it was. I thought it ripped by.
It could have been a little shorter. It took about.
I think it could have been. No movie.
Unless it is. I now realize that this is where I'm at.
I'm at. Is that if it is not Peter Jackson's original Lord of the Rings uncut, it does not need to be longer than two hours long.
But that's why the first Terrifier is so perfect. Yes, hour 20.
Because it is 90 minutes. Yeah, it's 80 minutes.
But that's why Terrifier 3 is got my vote more because it's not two and a half hours long. Terrifier 2 is too long.
Yeah, but it's like two hours and two minutes long. Are we mad that they left Halloween and moved to Christmas without even explaining themselves? No.
And no Thanksgiving. No.
Not a moment of Thanksgiving. Absolutely not.
I love, I love, love that they went to Christmas. Please.
Yeah. I love that he just went to school.
I just love Christmas horror movies. But why not make it come out in December? Because then this is how they make their money.
Yeah, because then you're going to watch it now and you're going to watch it again in December. I'm going to rent it again for Christmas.
Oh, yeah. We're going to show in the backyard.
Oh, yeah. Do you think there's ever a world where they would do a terrifier maze? Because the terrifier is like its own maze.
Oh, yeah. It must be.
But I think Universal would have to sign off on it. Or they'd have to pay a lot of money.
Yeah, they rent the character. Because in two, they spend time in a clown haunted house.
I know, they must have used one. It looked like they used one that was already existing.
Oh man, we just went to a great clown haunted house over at the Queen Harbor, the big scary ship. And they have a really good big top haunt that you can walk through.
and it's a of like you know, I feel like your brain is you know, interspersed between am I attracted to these scary clowns or am I scared of them? But it was also just really good. Hell yeah.
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Well, all right. So now we've been talking about them for a while.
I'm excited, for instance, for body horror this year. I'm going to go ahead and say it.
I've never seen Tetsuo. And I'm so excited to watch.
Tetsuo, you're going to be underwhelmed. Oh, really? No, I was excited.
It's horrifying. It's really gross.
I haven't seen it since college. It's Tetsuo the Iron Man.
Yeah, I haven't seen it since college. It's a really good old-fashioned.
Everybody gets freaked out. It's a guy's

turning into metal. It is...

It makes me think of Teton. Remember

Teton? Oh, Teton was good.

Yeah, man. But this...

I liked it a lot, and I think

that it's very... It's an art film.

Okay, alright. I'll give it a

slap in there. I'm just excited.

You know what I would say that

was... I forgot just how truly powerful it was.
It's Freaks. Oh, yeah, it's a good film.
And when we watched, so we watched in the backyard up on the projector screen, and on that scale, it's so good, and you kind of forget that the point of view of the movie is really about, so those of you who don't know, it is about a strong man and a new, I believe, like uh something like somebody does the trapeze like the trees are they essentially go to scam out one of the lead little people that are a group of these these people that work at a sideshow these freaks so-called 94 years old by the way it's from 1932 yeah and the movie has an undeniable atmosphere of real dread it was done by todd browning who also did dracula okay and it is a it's a wonderful movie but one of my favorite things is sort of like it's but it's kind of about how they're equal to everybody else yeah like we're supposed to be quote-unquote terrified of the freaks. But actually, the freaks are an extremely loyal family.
And what they are, which is why we like, I think it's a precursor. Like the Fast and the Furious? Yes.
Very similar. I feel like it's also why we like things like the Firefly family from Rob Zombie Films.
And why we like. They're loyal to each other.
They're loyal to each other. They're with children.
They have something with, it's like, they love each love each other there's a heart there and there's something about freaks about how especially the the guy that plays hans harry earls when he's this little little person and this way he does that little statement where he's just like just because i am small does not mean that i am not a man and he says it's very powerful like he is little man. Yeah.
And the revenge they get is wonderful. But it was also supposed to be far more graphic.
Originally, the strong man was, so if those of you, so spoiler, freaks kill them. Yeah.
Right. They turn, well, they turn the lady, they turn the grand dame Cleopatra into a duck woman.
They cut her legs and arms off. It's one of probably at the time.
Is that killing her or giving her a better, different life? You give me hashtag duck life. You know.
And so the end of the movie, it leaves on this picture of the duck woman, which at the time, apparently, like people would run screaming out of the theater. It's great, right? And it's awesome.
It's even now haunting. It's kind of silly, but it's also haunting.
Yeah. But apparently, originally, you saw them in their stills.
The movie is 65 minutes long. It was originally 90 minutes long.
The Freaks, this movie was because of the nature of the movie and just straight up. There were two realness of having people with actual.
I mean, they barely have sound in movies at this point yes like this was less than 10 years old extremely intense it's on my list of 1950s or earlier because i've never seen it before so i'm excited to check it out it's great it does hold up and you do recommend oh absolutely wonderful hell yeah i've never seen it before and i loved it hell yeah that. But the very end, the freaks rise up and they get their revenge.

But in the original cut, they had to cut 30 minutes because this movie is what created the rating system in the United States of America for film.

Like the Hays Code, all this stuff was made after this movie came out.

And the Terrifier told them to shove it up and shoot it.

It's kind of amazing that it's almost like from Freaks to terrifier three like think about that long road you know it's almost a hundred years yeah and uh freaks is got but the original ending was that the apparently you watch them power overpower the strongman which you do see but then they cut off his dick and balls. And then he, in the end,

and then they show you mutilating.

Apparently, originally, they mutilated her on camera.

Jesus.

And then, originally, the ending was him singing castrato

in this sort of, like, weird side circus.

And then you see her as the duck woman.

Wow.

Which I've never seen real castratos. Can you look it real castratos.
I don't think it's a real thing. Yeah, castratos are real.
I do believe there is one piece of evidence of castratos still singing. I know eunuchs exist, but they're not necessarily castratos.
No. A eunuch is one.
A castrato is a eunuch that can go, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. I thought it was, ooh.
I guess it depends. It depends on what happened to you.
Yeah. Here we go.
I got this right here, Mark. Right here, right here.
A modern castrato, not falsetto. The castrato! It's a dude.
It's a dude. Hell yeah.
No balls. Sounds great.
I bet, though, I'm going to say it probably sounded great before. Yeah, I mean, what are you going to say? The same thing for the lead singer of Boston? You know what I love is these Simons here.
All these comments are my favorite. I've learned so much just from the video and from reading the comments.
Wow, his voice is so, so beautiful. Such a lovely case of turning something many would deem imperfect into an advantage.
Incredibly admirable. I would say one thing about the 31 for 31, that I understand that we had to present our list to the fan base and stuff, but I would have liked to build my list as it went.
Yeah, because now I feel like I'm stuck to this fucking list when there's so many other movies I'm excited for. Why do you leave some spaces? I always leave a couple of wild card spaces so that I can just add in whatever as I go along.
Here's another comment on the Castrato voice. I see why they did such a practice now.
The voice quality is unlike anything else that I've heard before. Oh, thank you.
It's just sad the amount of boys who were cash-rated annually for this. See, I just think it's actually, you know.
This is from Mangla Too Cool. I just feel like the 31 for 31 is kind of nice because it takes away the pressure of having to choose what you're going to watch.
Yeah. Because then it's just like, from this list, you got to take something from this list.
Thank you for sharing. He has such a beautiful and rich voice.
You know what? You're lost in Castroto world over here. I will say that I've watched a good amount of movies now and I've only disliked one of them.
What was the one you disliked? The first Hatchet. See, that's so funny because I put Hatchet on there.
We actually probably got people connected to it, which is fine, But I told Eddie, I put Hatchet on there because I thought he'd like Hatchet. Well, Hatchet 2 is a whole other story.
It is. The first Hatchet is just tough to watch.
As a comedy fan, as someone who writes comedy and loves horror comedy, being in a sketch group from Murder Fist. See, and I don't love horror comedy, so I think that's why I haven't checked this out.
But you gotta be good at the comedy as well as the horror if you're gonna do it. Hatchet's silly, but I would, when you get to Hatchet 2, tell me what you think.
I'm excited for Hatchet 2. I've heard nothing but good things about Hatchet 2 and I didn't want to watch it until I saw Hatchet 1.
Well, I really like you to do, because I just figured you'd really like Hatchet. I figured you'd really like it, so try the sequels.
I mean, I don't have a choice. No.
Now, I will say a horror comedy, I think that we all enjoy is Frankenhooker, though. I watched that this morning.
Frankenhooker is a fucking classic. I had never seen it before.
I pulled it because it was on y'all's list. And I had, because again, I'm not always that big into horror comedy.
It's on Peacock if you want to watch it. It is so much fun.
It is an hour and 20 minutes. And it is just, it's tight.
It's silly. It's gory.
It's fun. And it's rude.
Oh, yeah. It's a rude film.
It's old school. It's very, very old school.
But I think that it holds up. I think that even now in our more enlightened age.
I mean, if you get upset about the use of the word hooker, it's not the movie for you. It's a genre flick.
It's definitely. Exploitation, you know, like what are we going to do? Yeah, it was made in 1990, you know, it's not.
And it's clearly a comedy. It's also an awesome name.
And you should be so lucky to call yourself a Frankenhooker. Yeah.
Alright, because that's what I think. Please, I'd love to be one.

Own it, because also, she's beautiful.

Also, I watched Bride of Frankenstein this week. See, I also

was really excited for you to see Bride of Frankenstein

because it's a gay allegory.

I don't see it. That's why you were

excited for him? I don't think it's a gay

allegory. How? It is.
He wanted

the woman. He was being forced to be with her.

He wasn't being forced. He's sexless.
He wanted the woman. He being forced to be with her he wasn't being forced he's sexless He wanted a woman She shot him down Frank and so there everybody oh, so you're saying that he was forced to be sis and this is like the his biggest problem Also, she's not even in the fucking movie.
That's cuz it's the old Sorry, I'm yelling. He's Eddie's angry today.
So she's not even in the movie. This happened the last time too He always gets angry when it's the two of us talking about movies.
And I don't know why. I like to yell.
I just miss you guys. I'm not actually upset.
I'm just yelling. Yeah, I know.
We just get scared. We get triggered, all right? Sometimes we get triggered, Eddie.
Yeah, but Brian Frankenstein was good, but it's basically Frankenstein, the first movie, and then at the very end, there's a chick. Yeah.
It's fucking pointless. Gay reading.
Hell yeah, man. In the decades since its release, modern film scholars such as myself have noted the possible gay interpretation of the film.
Director James Whale was openly gay and some of the actors in the cast, including Ernest Thessica, and according to rumor, Colin Clive were respectively gay or bisexual bisexual. Screens! I'm glad everyone was gay! Although James Curtis, Whale's biographer, rejects the notion that Whale would have identified with the monster from a homosexual perspective, scholars have perceived a gay subtext suffused throughout the film, especially a camp sensibility, particularly embodied in the character of Pretorius and his relationship with him.
He's gay! Pretorius is gay! He's just...

He doesn't know where to sit. Whoa.

Well, who cares about him? He's a fucking

bad guy! He is the bad guy. We talk about

Frankenstein and the Bride of Frankenstein.

Yes, the monster... Well, the monster and...

The monster who's affected by the male hermit

and the female bride he discusses with identical

language, friend, has been interpreted as

sexually unsettled and bisexual.

He's just chilling with the blind guy. But also, L Landchester is a goddess, by the way.
He's pure. Frankenstein's monster is pure.
Is he? He was just a child. That's how I view him as a child.
He was talking too much in this one, too. He is more talkative in this one.
I think that Bride of Frankenstein is my favorite of the Frankenstein films. I would like to see whatever the return of Bride of Frankenstein when we actually see her kick some ass.
That's what I thought. That's what I was there for.
It's not about kicking ass. It's about the love.
Allegory about sexuality. Allegory.
The only love that exists in this film is for Dr. Frankenstein and his soon-to-be wife who was kidnapped.
Frankenstein's relationship, Frankenstein's monster relationship with their hermit has been interpreted as a same-sex marriage that heterosexual society will not tolerate. No mistake.
This is a marriage and a viable one. But Whale reminds us quickly that society does not approve.
The monster, the outsider, was driven from this scene of domestic pleasure by two gun-tooting rubes who happened upon this startling alliance and quickly, instinctively, proceed to destroy it. But he's saying it with the assento, Eddie.
I don't know if that's selling it harder. The creation of the bride scene, according to cultural critic Gary Morris, as it continues, is wails reminded to the audience his Hollywood bosses, pairs, and everyone watching of the majesty and powerful of the homosexual creator.
Also, did you see in the big... When's that? I'm sorry, Oscar

Isaac? Yeah, it's the new Frankenstein.

Yeah, Gamma Del Toro.

Who's the monster? Somebody like

handsome. Oscar Isaac.
No, he's

the doctor. Oh, he is? Whoa,

Jacob Elordi? Is Jacob Elordi

Frankenstein? I'm so angry. Who's Jacob

Elordi? He's the big old boy.

The one from Saltburn. Big boy from

Saltburn. Everybody likes his cum.

Everybody likes his cum. He's a very

good... He did the Elvis thing.
Frankenstein should not be that hot. I hate this.
You just hate when pretty people get ugly things. I know, I know.
Let them be ugly. He should be the doctor.
He should be somebody. He should be Pretorius.
Now who's yelling?

Now I'm yelling.

I feel like this is just the 31 for 31. Why can't it be just ugly?

You're just angry.

You were never going to be Frankenstein.

No, I don't.

You were never going to be Frankenstein.

DeLiro was.

He's short.

This is called ad hominem attacks.

This is not about me.

All right.

This is about ugly.

I'm talking about uglier, bigger people.

This should have been played by, you know who should have played this? Luca Donchik. Luca Donchik.
Or, you know, who I really would have liked to see do it is Batista. But he's not tall enough.
Yeah, he's so thick. He's like my size.
You really don't need anyone who can speak to do these roles. This is what I'm saying, Jackie.
He doesn't need to be Jacob Elordi. You're going to cover him in makeup.
You need a big old boy. That's all he's doing.
Fire! Yeah, that's why Rob Zombie has Tyler Maine. We just watched the Rob Zombie's Halloween 2007.
God, I love it. It was horrible.
Everyone's like, it's so bad. Halloween 2 is actually my favorite.
I, you know, I went into it being like, okay, this Rob Zombie's Halloween, we're not going to enjoy it, but I've never seen it, so. It's really good.
It's great. I actually really enjoyed it, and I understand the issue that a lot of people don't like that they added in a backstory to Michael Myers rather than him just being more just like the pure evil that he is.
Also, people don't like that they're all goth and shit, too. That everyone, everyone being pure, and then Michael coming and killing the pure people.
And being the pure evil. Exactly.
That's why I get it. But I love it.
Yes, I like what Rob Zombie did to it. And I know that a lot of people, like, oh my God, how he writes women and stuff.
It's like, yeah, that's like the thing, though. It's funny.
It's a trashy horror movie. He's specifically writing it in that style.
He's going off of old Grindhouse films. It is specifically to...
It's exactly. It's Grindhouse rather than slasher.
And again, those are two different, sometimes, genres. But also, I think that Damon Leone is taking quite a bit from Rob Zombie's directing style.
Absolutely. What I have loved...
That's why, yes! What I love about Rob Zombie's films, and again, we're Rob Zombie apologists on the show. We're apologists, I understand.
We've always been this way. Apologists, I like them.
Most people dislike it. A lot of people don't like it.
Well, they can go fuck themselves. Exactly, Eddie.
I know, I know. Exactly, Eddie.
But I think there's something about... I mean, he's made some shit movies.
Sure, yeah. He certainly has.
I'm not saying it. His last batch has been rough.
His last batch has been rough. But that film...
But I watch them all. What Damien Leone has done is realize they're extremely good at...
Rob Zombie tone shifts awesomely. He does this great thing, especially in the Devil's Rejects world, in that world where he portrays the innocents.
The first third of that movie is almost unwatchable, and then the rest of it's a comedy. I love it.
I absolutely love it. The Devil's Rejects is probably top five horror films for me.
It's one of my favorite horror movies. But the thing about is the way he portrays the innocent is funny because he obviously, and like, he shows contempt for the innocent.
He can't wait to kill them. Yeah, he shows contempt for the innocent, which is for us as a viewer, I love.
I love as a truly morbid person. Like, Terrifier 3.
The Monsters was bad. The Monsters was bad.
But Terrifier 3, but actually it's more moments than you thought it deserved. It actually had more good stuff than it deserved.
Yeah, no, I finished it. It wasn't that bad.
El Superbisto's unwatchable. Unwatchable.
31 is unwatchable. Yes.
Yes, but the rest of them are fine. And then the new one, the sequel, the third, Devil's Rejects, was a little rough.
Oh my God. But I just feel bad because Sid Haig was so sick.
Why did they drag him there? I guess he needed something to do. They were just trying, literally according to Rob Zombie, they were just trying to get him on film one last time.
One last time. And so that was the whole thing.
Sometimes you gotta get someone out of the house. Because also Sid Haig was supposed to be the guy that replaced him.
He was not supposed to, he was supposed to be in the entire movie. Yeah.
And then he got replaced. So the whole thing got changed.
So that I can understand. But Three from Hell.
Damon Leone does it so well, especially in Terrifier 3, because, like, you know spoilers, but all of the sentimentality, like, he does this thing where the music kicks in, and it's, like, emotional. And it's, like, a good drama scene.
Like, he's made these, like, a good, old-fashioned, like old fashioned like that's a like beautiful family. It reminds me of Elm Street.
It reminds me of a thing of we're caring. You are making me like about these people.
I'm watching all of these tremendously lovely people that I know that are all going to be fucking tortured. And I'm so excited for it.
Yeah. As a viewer.
I can't wait. And that's what it is.
It's almost like when Rob Zombie does it, when Damien Leone does it, it's almost like, you know, they say you put a little salt on a watermelon. Yeah.
And that's what makes it taste good. Oh, God.
He put a little salt on a watermelon. You just reminded me of a scene from Terrifier 2.
Oh, yeah. It's good to take the watermelon and you put it in the ocean and eat it that way.
That's a good trick. I got a fun Sid Haig story for you.
You Sid Hague story for you. Tell us the Sid Hague story.
So I'm at Montreal Comedy Festival doing warm up for Roast Battle the TV show and there's a lot of celebrities in the audience it's like full like half of the X-Men are there because they were filming in Montreal at the time it was like crazy and then as I'm warming up you know you're calling them out and shit like that I see fucking Sid Hague in the audience and I was like whoa I was like that, you know, you're calling him out and shit like that. I see fucking Sid Haig in the audience.
And I was like, whoa. I was like, that's the celebrity I want to meet.
Fucking Sid Haig. And I was like, give it up for Sid Haig, everybody.
You know, like blowing up his spot and shit. And it wasn't him.
It was just some ugly dude. Oh, no.
Well, at least you roasted him real good before the show. Honestly, it does help.
Yeah. It does help.
He's like, at least I look like somebody. Well, that's the thing.
It's like, no one knows who the fuck Sid Higg is. Oh, my God.
That's sad. They should have.
He was like. Apparently, he's very nice, though.
My husband has him. Oh, he's dead.
I know. I know he's dead now.
He's dead. He was nice when he was alive, is what I'm saying.
Now he's cold. Yes.
And food for the worms. Oh, yeah.
But Bride of Frankenstein, it was good. It was fine.
But what I did of their classic, we have a classic section. Yes.
And I also watched American Werewolf in London. Which I figured you'd love.
I've seen it before, but I never finished it because it's so slow, and I always watched it when I was super young. I think I've always fallen asleep while watching it.
The end rocks. So make it so start it again.
It's the best. The end rocks.
It's so good. Okay, great.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I loved American Werewolf in London.
It's funny. It's got a great story and character development.
I can't. Everyone should just go out and make sure they watch that on the 31 for 31.

Hell yeah.

Love that.

I do have a correction.

I was wrong on the title of the film that I had entered into our 31 for 31.

I need this.

I need this help.

I have re-done it because I realized it was not the film that I thought it was.

I'm a moron.

I've changed it.

I'm going to change it officially.

We'll put it onto socials.

Well, I will say with our 32 movies on our 31 for 31. I forgot.
I forgot. Yeah, I know.
So you could just take it off. I could just take it off.
But I'm adding the house October built, which I also think is an extremely, because I added old found footage section because I'm a bitch for fucking found footage. VHS beyond, bro.
I'm going to see it. I haven't seen it yet.
I've been waiting. The Houses October Built is great.
Oh, you added it to the list. I did.
It's extremely scary. I think it's really good.
Is it? I really like it. I also forgot how much I love the original VHS.
The original VHS is great, but again, VHS Beyond. Because I feel like the last couple of VHSs were not, you know, with anthology movies.
I haven't seen any of them. I'm excited for the first one.
The best part about anthology movies is that, like, well, if you don't like it, you'll probably like the next one. And I've liked at least two in every single VHS movie.
I saw the wedding scene in VHS, too, and that was pretty fucking cool. Fun! It's a fun one! It's great, but also, that one has the best binding glue of all of them, the VHS.
The, has a really good binding glue in terms of the runner bit. The theme.
The theme bit is good. That's why I like VHS Beyond because I didn't know anything about it.
We just popped it on. I didn't realize it was all alien stories.
Oh, I did not know it was all aliens. It's alien stories.
And, God, Jeff knew the name of the dude. Is the through line.
Like, apparently he's this, you're he is it's some big alien dude that does these like interstitials in between but what i like is that every alien is very different in every okay like it's all i think they're getting better at um making these justin long makes a really fun one it's stuff that you don't expect and um i really enjoyed it. Well, you know, I really liked the first one.
But also, I put another one of my truly favorite found footage movies on here. Lake Mungo.
Yeah. Lake Mungo is fun.
Have you ever seen it? Oh, yeah. We did it last year.
I haven't gotten to it yet. Lake Mungo has got Twin Peaks vibes.
Oh, okay. But it's very good.
Very scary. Very creepy.
Very scary. I'm very excited for that.
You know what? Going back to the anthology horror movies that I like, the ones from the 90s. There's two in particular that I watched a bunch growing up that I wish that I need.
Now I want to re-watch them. Tales of Terror? No, but Tales from the Hood.
Yeah, Tales from the Hood is my favorite. And Body Bags.
Body Bags is great. It's on Shudder.
Oh, is it? I don't have Shudder. It's great.
It's worth it always. I've been chilling for Shudder forever.
But Tales from the Hood is my favorite July 4th horror movie. I don't know what it is.
There's something about that movie. I've watched it on July 4th almost every year.
The soundtrack's great, too, by the way. It's's great there's something about this movie that makes me think of The Sins of America that it is just great except for the one time man I will say though it's movie two it's one issue about me choosing the movie is that I have to remember because it's like sometimes I'll choose a movie and I'll be like everybody's gonna love this and like we did something we something, people had over, I was like, let's throw on a movie.
And I was like, Tales from the Hood. And I put it on and everyone was sad.
Yeah, you forget. I forgot that.
It ebbs and flows. Oh yeah, people get really sad with this movie too.
But I was like, but it's got the little penny. It's fine.
It's got a little penny in it. Yeah.
But it's fine. Which is still one of my favorite side characters of all time that I miss from the 90s as well.

Little Penny.

Yeah, you remember Little Penny?

Oh, yeah.

I remember.

I was an Orlando Magic fan.

Anthony Hardaway.

Oh, yeah.

Now, that's why there are just certain movies that I love to throw on that are completely mindless.

Now, this is my first time going through.

So, every year, we add on a new Friday the 13th.

And I'm going to be real with you. Two years ago, I had never seen the original friday 13th so every year we watched the next one so last we watched the second one this year we watched the third one now the third one you know it's the worst one yeah it really wasn't as bad as i thought it was i guess because everyone told me it was the worst one then Then you were prepared for it.
He's not even in it.

Yeah.

No, he isn't.

He's in this one.

This is where he gets the mask.

Oh, then it's four he's not in.

Yes.

No, this is the one where he gets the mask for the first time rather than just wearing it.

So I never realized the origin of the mask.

Yeah, there's two movies, no mask.

And I'm really, because this is my first time going through this series,

I really thought that, oh, by the time he gets to the third one, it's going to be a real stinko, stinko, stinko. And sure, it's mindless.
It's not like reinventing the Friday the 13th genre. No, wait until you get to seven.
Seven's badass. But I'm excited to go on the journey of as it goes up and down through time when they're like, yeah, make another one.
I guess put another one on.

And sometimes I was like, I will say

and this is probably where I get the most flack is that

I think the Friday the 13th is my least favorite

of the bit top. Well, because it's

clearly a knockoff. Yeah.

It's clearly a knockoff of Halloween. I like what

Jason ended up being. I like what he got

to. I like the later on ones.

Yeah, but it's like, one day I'll come back

to it because it's funny because it's both Natalie and I's least favorite. You ever see the movies that made us of Friday the 13th? No.
It was a nightmare. Everyone got hurt.
It was a terrible set. What, the reboot? No, the original Friday the 13th with Kevin Bacon and shit.
Oh, yeah. They have the made us through, like, the documentaries on Netflix.

They have one about that.

And it was just like, it was a nightmare to make.

Yeah, of course.

That's great.

Yeah, of course.

No money.

Fucking out in the middle of the woods.

Yeah, just torturing everyone involved.

Oh, hell yeah.

But again, I do want to say about Friday the 13th Part 3, I was very stoned while I watched it.

So it really was.

It helps.

And don't, you know, go into it thinking that your life is about to be changed. Okay, yeah, that's Jason Lives? No, this is Friday the 13th, part three.
I don't know, what's the tag, though? It's just part three. Oh, it is Jason Lives.
Oh, it is Jason Lives. Oh, no, it is part three.
Okay, it is part three. Oh, man, and that's why it's good to do, because you never know the gems inside of the franchise.
You know what? It's like Hellraiser. Hellraiser's my favorite.
It's my favorite of all the

franchises. Yeah.
Because I

like the bad ones too.

I'm Hellraiser 3 Stan.

Ooh.

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Well, I'm also excited. This is a movie, I remember the VHS cover, and they did a reboot of it, and I haven't seen that either.
Do you remember the movie Cube? Yes. From the 90s.
Cube's bad. I remember gleaming the Cube, but that was like an action movie.
Oh, that was an action movie? Cube is not as good as you remember it. Is it not? No.
So I remember the VHS cover. It's all talking.
That's what you forget. You forget about Cube because I went to go rewatch it and I was like tired or whatever and you're like, oh yeah, because all of the visual elements of Cube are awesome.
I thought it was going to be scary. It's just talking.
It's hard to find good every year because we do 50s or earlier, 60s, 70s, 80s, and we do all of it. 90s every year, I'm just like, all right.
Well, because sometimes they are real hit and miss. Because I've seen, don't get me wrong, you can always watch Scream again.
You can watch 13 Ghosts. I want to watch new ones, though.
I'm trying to find ones that I've never seen. Yeah, I think that, Jackie.
But there's usually a reason why you haven't seen them. Yes, and you've seen quite a bit of horror films.
I was talking to Julie about this this week where we were just talking about horror movies in general, and she asked a very interesting question, which I'm going to pose to you, and then I'll ask the question from Julie to me, and I'll answer it for me, but I want to hear your all's answers. I'm Julie.
Well, you don't know the question. I'm Eddie? I'm Julie.
I'm both. I'm Julie.
You leave my wife out of it. You can say whatever you want about it.
No, but she asked me, which horror movie have you seen that you wish you wrote? Oh my God. All of them.
I couldn't really, I sat there and I thought about it. And I think the horror movie I wish I wrote that I like the most, in a weird way, Tales from the Crypt Demon Knight.
Yeah, I like it. That's a good one.
I really? You're not overshooting it. No, it's hilarious.
You're not being like, I wish I wrote Hereditary. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're not overshooting it. That makes sense.
Because honestly, first thought that came to my mind, Psycho Goreman. I love Psycho Goreman.
They've got a new one coming out. They've got a new one.
Oh, my God. I love Psycho Goreman.
And I love just like that. Talk about a horror comedy that does it right.
I guess it's more a sci-fi comedy than any horror. It's pretty horror.
Yeah, but there's also horror elements to it. They're ripping people apart.
My honest opinion is that if there was one I wish I could write is something in the style, basically, of The Ring. Yeah.
Ooh, something simple, something just... That's my cue, is that if you're going to be scary, it's so...
Scary is so hard. Yeah.
Scary is so, like... It's just, like, funny.
It's entirely scary. It's so hard.
Yeah. Scary is so like, it's just like funny.
It's entirely subjective. Pretty much.
Like you are, do you, everybody has their own parameters where they find scary or, or what are not, whatnot. And it's also like, it's about timing and it's about how do I deliver this idea so simply into the person's brain?

You know what I mean?

That's what dread is.

Dread is like, it's weird how dread in films, it's off by inches.

You can tell why when I'm watching David Lynch.

Oh, dread is the emotion.

Locked in.

I was thinking of dread, the movie.

The movie, dread.

When I'm watching David Lynch, there's something about the way. It's literally about the composition of the shot and the timing and the atmosphere.
Yeah. And he knows technically that allows you to feel this sense of thick, purposeful dread.
Yeah. But you can tell the difference between the movies that are dreadful and extremely boring.
But I don't quite know what that difference is,

but you know that it's a difference.

But it's different for everybody, too.

It does. It's entirely subjective.

But I mostly find that people who don't have budgets

think that they can pull off dread,

and they don't understand that dread is probably

one of the most complex filmic elements of the horror genre.

And what you do with less.

I actually was thinking about,

I just saw that it's uh it's

open for streaming i talked about it in the last one that we did talking about horror movies oddity that's another movie that like i feel like for some people might come off as boring but i was so like wrapped the entire time depends on the dread that was created from it that i thought was like really creepy imagery,

very unsettling.

The movie that I always think of as the biggest failure in that is that, what was the one with Harry Potter? That stupid garbage horror movie that he did? No, not Tusk. That's the Kevin Smith movie.
It was like the Black House. I didn't bother with it.
It's like those type of movies. It's kind of how I felt about, unfortunately, it's how I felt about The Shape of Water.
Oh, I love The Shape of Water. But it doesn't need dread.
It's whimsical. And then also, fortunately, Keanu del Toro's other movie, the gothic horror that he did, where I was just...
Pan's Labyrinth? No, not that one. Not Horns.
Not Horns. Not Horns.
Horns is good. That's what I was thinking, though, of Tusk, though.
That's why I was thinking. No, horns is good.
The one that he did. Remember, he has to, like, staple the guns to his hands? It's like he goes to.
Guns Akimbo? No, Guns Akimbo's good. That's fun.
There's one where he was, like, it's like he's in front of a house. And they're like, it's sad, didn't they? I was a ghost in that house.
Do you know what? The Woman in Black. That movie fucking sucks dick.
She's literally looking through Daniel Radcliffe movies. That's the movie sucks dick.
That's the movie. It sucks dick.
Well, you know what I find? I like Daniel Radcliffe. I do too.
I love him as an actor. I think he's doing great shit.
I love his work. I just think that that movie, that was not his fault.
I'm just showing that's an example of a movie that thinks it's dreadful, but it's just boring. You know what movie's fucking dreadful? It follows.
That's exactly, that is the ultimate definition. Yes, yes, yes.
I actually said, have you ever done that with a comedy or even with any one of these movies where I've always watched a movie, that movie always freaked me out, I love It Follows, and then the last time I watched it, I'm sitting watching it, and I'm just like, it's just a naked old man far away. Yeah.
And I realized it broke the movie for me when I was just like, that's just a guy over there. You can say that about any ghost.
I know. I know.
But it was like, I ruined it. You ever do that where it ruined it for myself just for that night? Yeah, I get that.
Where I'm sitting and watching it. I've just been like.
Well, it's like The Shining. The first time you see the bear giving the dude a blowjob, it's terrifying.
Now it's fun. Now I like it.
Yeah. Now it's like, I want to, I was like.
Look at him getting his. I want to know him.
You only hang out with him. Yeah, dude.
I want him to have a show on the network. All right.
So what on our list have you not seen that you're most excited for? The thing that I'm saving towards the end are Gangeum Hunted Asylum. And I am saving Nero-E the Curse, which is also wonderful.
I'm also saving... This weekend, we're going to bang some out.
We're going to go to your house. We're going to probably do...
I'd say we do these franchises. I'm going to watch some tonight.
I want to do Elm Street together, and I want to do Halloween 6 together. I'm really excited for Blood Diner.
I've owned the DVD for like a decade and never watched it. what's nice is that Do you like Jennifer's Body too right? I love Jennifer's Body I thought for sure I was going to hate it That's why I haven't seen it It wasn't like I was scared or anything It seemed awful It got bad reviews I was like fuck this movie Fuck Juno It was great I hated Jun hated Juno.
About the Terrifier series, and I was like, I'm not going to like it. It's not for me.
And then sometimes you just got to check it out, and you're like, damn, wow. And that's the lesson we're going to leave you with tonight.
Yeah, it's okay to dislike some horror movies. Horror movies, it's the only genre of film that if it's a bad one, I'm not mad that I watched it.
Same, same. I always kind of feel like that with action movies, but that's different.
You know what I mean? That's just a good time. But yeah, but I wouldn't leave you with this is that I think it's important.
No VHS unturned. So if you go out there and you're afraid to see a movie, you don't know what's in it.
It might be the best thing you ever see. You have no idea that you have no idea that you haven't seen your favorite movie yet.
Yeah. But also highly recommend Shudder because Shudder is a great app to just...
And it takes a chance. It's got so many great indie weird horror movies.
This is why you two know so much more than I. Oh yeah.
Also just constantly it's all I watch. I just love horror movies.
Also I don't watch television. I don't watch anything else.
I don't watch the news. I don't watch anything but horror movies and YouTube.
Also I I'm going to say, I'm very upset. I'm destroyed.
I have a 14-year-old's brain. Apparently, the reboot of I guess, is it a reboot? Remake of Speak No Evil, apparently, is really good and I, on principle, didn't want to go see it.
No, it's not good. I don't like that.
It's supposed to not be good. Rob says it's not good.
Because it's got all these insane reviews. They're lying to us.
It has to be lies. They're lying.
It has to be lies If you've seen the trailer, you've seen the movie. I know.
That's the thing. And I love the original.
And I don't want to see. I mean, I like James McAvoy.
But I don't know if I need to see it. You know what had great reviews that I thought was fucking doo-doo? Was that new serial killer movie.
Strange Darling. Oh, you were talking about this.
I haven't seen it yet. Cock-a-poo-poo, in my opinion.
I'll watch it at some point. Yeah, it's the new...
Everyone's like, oh, the twist! Oh, I liked it. I liked it.
It's just like one of those things that goes to Salt Burn is like they're trying to impress me with how edgy they are, and I'm like, I've seen it! I understand, but to me, that's when I get my... Still effective, though.
That's me when I get to my most boomer, when I'm yelling about, like, we did it 10 years

ago.

I like strange, darling.

Yeah.

Every single time I see, like, offensive comedy, where it's like, we did it already.

You know what I mean?

But I also understand.

Yeah.

It's time for people to find new things, and there's always a shot.

They did try something, I will say that.

I just, I've got such a soft spot for any horror movie that's like, well, you know,

they're trying to hit it out of the park, and it was an hour and a half, and I didn't look at the time the entire time. I mostly just like to see that they're trying.
So go. You didn't do Joker.
Oh, we didn't do Joker. Is Joker a horror movie? All right, so right before we talk about this, my one statement on Joker 2, I'm going to say this right now, spoilers a little bit.
Joker 2 seems to be made upon the premise that everybody who sort of liked Joker 1, which is everybody, according to them, went to go see Joker 1. I did not particularly enjoy Joker 1.
I liked Joker 1. I felt that it was a ripoff of the King of Comedy.
It was. And the reason why I went to go see it was because it had the words The Joker in it and it had Joaquin Phoenix playing The Joker.
And I just wanted to see what that was. I was disappointed with what it was in the end.
And then in the end, what it seems that Todd Phillips has decided is that Joker 2 is a response to those people that like Joker for he considers to be the wrong reasons. And then that's the reason why they punish the Joker throughout the entire film.
And then they rape him until he's not the Joker anymore, which is the single worst lesson I've seen in a film. It'd be like if the end of the Joseph Fritzl story, if Elizabeth was like, you know what, actually, I miss my dad.
And so it is not like... It is fun to watch a troll troll trolls, though.
But do it on your own time. Do it on Twitter, like everybody else, Because you spent $200 million that should have went to North Carolina.

Also, that movie did

not need

$200 million to be made. It did

at least in 52 for Joaquin, Lady

Gaga, and Todd Phillips. And then the

rest of it, I don't know where the hell it went.

Just the fact that, I mean, big

again, spoiler, spoiler, spoiler. You can skip

this. Skip, skip, skip, skip.

The fact that she wasn't the one that bombed them

in the end was the dumbest shit. That didn't make

any sense. The baby plotline went

Thank you. Again, spoiler, spoiler, spoiler.
You can skip this. Skip, skip, skip, skip.
But it's just like the fact that she wasn't the one that bombed them in the end was the dumbest shit. That didn't make any sense.
The baby plot line went fucking absolutely nowhere. He didn't smile at the end.
The idea of like, now Todd Phillips is trying to say the ending showed that he had acceptance about dying. He's like, no, he didn't.
He looked upset. And then the stupid Heath Ledger.
He got passed on to that. Yeah, it's the dumbest shit I've ever seen.
All of the constant, like, the constant, like, it's also like, if you're gonna have songs, be a fucking musical. If you could spend 200 million dollars, hire some fucking actors and some fucking instruments.
And also don't hire Lady Gaga and tell her not to sing. And then have them just whisper sing.
And this is my thing. They didn't even have a big musical number.
Do something different with some of the songs. Try a new thing with one of the songs.
Try something else with one of the fucking songs. I did like to use The Joker by Sammy Davis Jr.
I was real mad that that song wasn't in the first movie. It sounds like they went to, that movie sounded like they went to Wikipedia and said, what are songs that have clowns in it? And then they just kind of put it in things.

It's just... Uh-oh.

Look who's angry now.

Sometimes you just got to calm down, Henry.

Think about Pearl.

Pearl was one of the most expertly made sequels I've ever seen.

I didn't like it.

Listen to them, Henry.

Maxine was far superior.

I loved... I loved the most.
But I'm at peace with Eddie's opinions because this is America. Yes, right? This is America.
And I don't, nor should I, attack Eddie for his beliefs. Good for you, Henry.
We've grown a lot this year.

I really, really have.

So thank you guys so much. Henry has grown a lot.

Well, yeah, sideways, yeah.

Yeah, it's mid-second, yeah.

Yeah, Eddie.

Yeah, Eddie.

How can I break this cycle of pain?

Maybe if a bunch of cops come and rape Eddie, he'll stop making fun of me.

Oh, Joker, do it. We gotta get Eddie.
of here. That would be sex.
And not rape, because I love it. I love you, boys.
And that's why Eddie runs a show called The Brighter Side. He's always keeping a look on The Brighter Side.
Patreon.com slash last podcast. I'm going to have to watch us do all this shit in the flesh.
Go at LP on the left for all the social bullshits for some reason. Go to twitch.tv slash LPNTV to see our Twitch shows.
We're working very hard with them. They're great.
Who's the Bitch? Is one of the new ones? It's great. Come check it out.
Gugu's a great one. We've got Goodput coming up on October 24th.
Two weeks from now, we are going to have a big show in LA. The Wiltern.
Last podcast on the left. It's going to be fucking unbelievable.
I can't wait for that. It's a fucking bucket list venue for me.
And then the following month in December, we're going to be in Brooklyn playing King's fucking Theater. Mookie's back in Brooklyn! No, he's not.
He lives in Los Angeles. Yeah.
No, he does live back in Brooklyn. Oh, good for him.
Yeah, yeah.

This Mookie.

Yeah.

What's up, Mookie?

I'll invite him to the show.

Yeah, please.

Jackie, where are people to find you for your show?

No, I didn't want to talk about any of that.

I just wanted everyone to know that I wasn't actually drinking this Oreo Coke Zero.

I just opened it so I could try a sip of it.

How was it?

Someone don't protest.

It is not very good.

Can I actually try that?

Yeah, you can definitely try it.

I'll try it.

Yeah, it's a Coke Zero.

But Who's the Bitch is doing great.

I love this show.

Yeah, hit up whosethebitch.com if you've got a problem that needs some advice.

It can be big.

It can be small.

We need all your juice.

It's better than it could be.

That's for damn sure.

I feel like it reminds me of the Manhattan soda, like the espresso soda.

Yes.

The Oreo Coke Zero.

But we're not sponsored by them, so don't fucking buy them.

Yeah, fuck them.

Fuck them.

Yeah, yeah.

All right.

Thank you. like the espresso soda.
Yes. The Oreo Coke Zero, but we're not sponsored by them, so don't fucking buy them.
Yeah, fuck them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
All right? Go get fucking tab. See you soon.
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