Episode 640: Heinrich Himmler Part IV - From Atlantis to Auschwitz

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There's no place to escape to this is the last time

on the left.

That's when the cannibalism started.

What was that?

Oh, today.

I just want to say, before we even begin, thank you to Votan

for allowing me to have the white strength in order to do this show.

If it wasn't...

Now, Votan, he's the bootleg transformer.

That's actually...

a big bone of contention.

It's a big bone of contention because

the one thing he does not like being at all is unified with anything.

So Votan really does not enjoy the whole pageantry of the other racial monsters that show up to create him.

Ah, yes.

Yes.

But Votan, what up?

Thanks again for making me pink.

It's nice to be on your planet Earth.

And man, oh man, I sure hope you put another Christ out there for us to destroy as a puppet of your unwillingness to sacrifice yourself.

Well, once Greta becomes a man, she will be that Christ.

Oh,

Greta,

my sweet Votan's bride.

Parks.

I'm here with Votan's number one boy, Henry Zabrowski.

It's me, Dee Hee.

I'm looking for all the greatness in every rock that might look like an ox.

Yeah.

That's a deep cut.

We'll talk about that.

That's a deep cut.

Well, I know exactly what you mean.

I don't.

And with us the man who knows nothing, Ed Larson.

That's right.

I'm Voton's 420th man.

Taylor Swift is definitely Hitler's grandniece, right?

Yeah, who are great grandniece, I believe.

There's no way she's not.

She's selling new SS necklaces.

Is she?

Have you seen this thing?

I have not.

She took them off her website.

They're lightning bolt necklaces.

Double lightning bolts.

Two double lightning bolt necklaces.

They're next to each other.

Uh-huh.

Yeah.

People are upset about it.

It's not an eight-pointed star and lightning bolt necklace.

Himmler would have so many notes for this necklace that, to be honest, I think Taylor Swift should be ashamed.

Yeah, yeah, because him, oh, that's a, yeah.

I don't know.

It's loose.

I don't think it is.

I definitely think it's a mistake, but man, you gotta, you gotta check your notes.

No, exactly.

Himmler would look at this and be like, how about the doubles him up?

I I mean, I'm willing to bet that the person who designed this was far more inspired by Bowie than Himmler.

But looking at it, holy shit, it looks like Nazi jewelry.

That looks like something that's like in the German museum in the bad section.

The only thing that we just can count on is the lack of education of the Zoomers, and that's what has led to this.

So, here we are.

So, Heinrich Himmler, part four.

Woo!

So, when we last left Heinrich Himmler, the year was 1934, and everything was very unfortunately going Himmler's way.

Everything's coming up, Himmler.

You'll be swell.

You'll be great.

I got the whole Reich on my plate.

That's fun.

Shot in here, starting now, honey.

Every juice count.

The concentration camps were becoming an essential feature of the Third Reich.

Those were, of course, Heinrich Himmler's creation.

The Gestapo was under Himmler's direct command.

That's the German secret police.

And the Knight of the Long Knives had both destroyed any internal opposition within the Nazi Party, and it had tricked the German people into thinking that the Nazi chaos had passed.

And so, with Germany firmly in Nazi control, Heinrich Himmler and the rest of the Nazis were free to reshape the country in their own image without opposition, using a framework that was directly inspired by the pseudo-scientific and pseudo-historical authors that Himmler and Hitler had loved so much.

So, if they were doing it in Himmler's image, it would be a cabbage-patched doll with half a shaved head.

Yes, it would look like a hungover worm.

Well, according to the Nazi leader's very selective reading of history, only one race fit into the category of the so-called founders of culture.

These founders were the entirely fictional creation of various fever-brained German racists.

They were the tall, willowy, flaxen-haired Aryans of Northern Europe.

But going off those feverish fictional accounts, Hitler and his ilk believed that only the Aryans had the genius necessary to create civilization and its byproducts, like music, literature, agriculture, architecture.

It was the Aryans, according to the Nazis, who had single-handedly advanced all of humankind with their unparalleled brilliance.

And that honestly really kind of speaks to the fact that I left several one-star reviews on every single The Weekend album because it never featured a tuba.

And I don't really know what music is without a tuba.

That's all they have is tuba.

This is also good.

And the accordion.

And the accordion.

Beautiful noises.

You see, you say selective reading.

I'm actually now my last little jump into this whole fun world of this ideology.

It's more of a, and I hate to say this, Marcus.

They were lying about a lot of stuff.

They made up a lot of things, Marcus.

They saw stuff on walls and cave walls and just kind of said it was giant Aryans versus the Jews, whoever it, whatever it was.

Yeah.

Yeah.

If you think that Aryans built the fucking pyramids.

Yeah, dude, without SBF 100?

Now, Heinrich Himmler, of course, believed in the Aryan myth as well.

But the difference between Himmler and Hitler is that Adolf Hitler's belief in all this shit was more surface-level.

Hitler liked these ideas because they were useful for his ultimate goal of restarting the Great War.

So the details didn't really matter.

In fact, for Hitler, the details could be kind of embarrassing.

Oh, yeah, because guess what the details found out?

It's all brown people.

Yeah.

Every single thing you wished white people did, it was done by brown people first.

Yeah, and all of the details of the cosmology and all the details of, you know, Atlantis and all that.

Like, like, Hitler has to go and, like, hang out with the king of Italy and impress him as a commoner.

And he doesn't want to carry all this baggage.

Like, and also, did you know we're from Atlantis?

That's great, right?

Yeah.

I had flippers.

Yeah.

Do you know how I had flippers and then they were taken from me?

It is crazy because Atlantis famously failed.

Yeah.

Well, that's the thing, is that there's a reason why Atlantis failed, and it's a big part of the Holocaust.

Himmler, however, as opposed to Hitler, he was all about the details.

In his deep, unassailable belief in the myths created by the aforementioned Volkish movement, they informed his every decision.

Inspired by these beliefs, Heinrich Himmler used his main guys, the SS, as a sort of petri dish to game out a lot of the ideas put forth by his favorite right-wing pseudo-scientists and pseudo-historians.

This was all in service to expanding his long-held fantasies in which Germany was destined to grow into a race of pure-bred Aryan warrior farmers who would eventually rule the globe.

This fucking Bible fan fiction is so annoying.

Honestly, it'll be beyond that.

It's way beyond the Bible.

It's too Jewish.

Yeah, the Bible's way too Jewish.

Yeah, I mean, there is definitely some things that they take from the Bible.

Like the Great Flood is a really big part of it, like the antediluvian shit.

Like that's that's a very big part of it.

Do you want me to get into positive Christianity?

No, no, it's a whole thing.

Honestly, it's not this episode, it's a later episode, unfortunately.

Now, Himmler's never-ending obsession with racial purity was especially on display in the way that he developed the SS.

And it actually prevented him from making the SS as large of an organization as it could have been.

After Himmler took on a fair amount of Ernst Röhm's SA men after the night of the long knives, Himmler purged the SS of some 60,000 men for not being Aryan enough, which brought the ranks of the SS down to what Himmler believed was an elite group of 200,000 Aryans.

Now, these men were expected to be first and foremost Aryan perfection when it came to surface-level looks, because Himmler was obsessed with surrounding himself with beautiful blonde young men who met his very fussy standards.

Big, pink, nippled

golden.

I don't like the small nipples on the man.

I think that Aryan should have the big puffy nipples.

Pinks.

Puffy nipples.

Like beautiful German breasts.

Have you ever seen blonde pubes?

No.

Right?

No.

That's how you know you're Aryan.

If you have blonde pubes, like literally, like, like, not to be like this, Marilyn Monroe in your pants.

And it's going to, like, it's so hard.

If your pubes have a sheen and a bounce to them,

you're Aryan material all the way, baby.

Dye them.

You can shave them.

Yeah.

You shave them, they come back different every time.

But these men in the SS were also expected to be physically fit.

This was merely an extension of the overall Nazi milieu because physical fitness had become a nationwide obsession.

When you go a little bit through more, like, you know, the Volk lifestyle, did you ever hear about the paintings of Fidus?

I did not.

The paintings of Fidus hung in many, many rural German homes.

And it was one of those proto super racist things that now we know is a massive dog whistle yeah like if you had it in your home you would eventually become a Nazi ostensibly sure and Fidus loved painting naked German boys worshiping the sun and so it's this idea of a free-flowing blonde locked naked boy being uh caressed his buttocks his tender buttocks his little prebubescent penis and balls being caressed by the light of the sun.

This really has nothing to do with what I just said.

But it's about this idea of physical fitness.

They view it.

This is all of the taking it back to the homeland, the pure body, the pure body of the German man, the Germanic person was just like, he was taught and he jumped from tree to tree.

Yes.

And Goring showed that with his physical fatness.

Yes.

Well, that's what was ironic about all of this.

It's because the Germans were obsessed with health and obsessed with physical fitness and obsessed with presenting this ideal body.

It's ironic when you consider the physical shape of the Nazi leaders.

Hitler was dumpy and disheveled.

Goebbels was a fucking living skeleton.

And Goring, he looked like a fucking pig that had been turned into a human by a witch's curse.

Unfortunately, I'm becoming a bit of a Goring head.

And he, what a fashion sense, though.

Oh, man.

Wow.

When he wore that periwinkle blue suit for all those Nazis, wow, you must have been, that's bravery.

He looked like Otho in beer juice.

Yes.

I didn't even realize that.

Yes.

So did they ever get all the generals together and tell them they were too fat?

No!

No, they never had the balls.

No, they never had.

Now, Heinrich Himmler was, of course, no different from the rest of the Nazi leaders in his lack of physical fitness.

Himmler was a nerd, a bookworm, but he nevertheless tried to keep up with the jocks that made up the majority of the SS.

See, Himmler had instituted strict physical requirements for SS members, and the SS officers who were at the top of their game could earn a special SS sports badge by completing a grueling physical physical routine.

Himmler actually once tried to run the routine himself.

Lift me up.

Lift me up

to me to my sides officers.

Up the rope my girl.

But his pigeon-shaped reader's body performed so poorly that his assistants had to eventually just tell him that he met all the necessary standards, just so Himmler would stop humiliating himself.

Because your boss is in front of you struggling to get through an obstacle course and you have to go like

Heinrich Heinrich And also, by the way,

do you know what Heinrich, like, what the English version of Heinrich is?

It's Henry.

Yes.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, I know.

Yeah.

Heiny.

Heinrich, please just call it.

I'm stuck in this trash can.

And you know what?

Being stuck in the trash can is the way you've been the brad.

Here you go.

I know.

I'm the meanest.

It's a 454.

It's like him just running trying to do it.

And everyone's like, hey,

you did it.

Yeah.

Hey, congratulations.

Hey, you did it.

I can't believe you completed it so fast!

That's what's great about not really giving a shit about anything, is that you'll take that as a win.

The Aryan appearance and physical fitness of the SS was merely the base requirements for Himmler's ultimate fantasy involving his men.

But it must not be forgotten that the SS, even through all this goofy shit, they were some of the cruelest, most brutal people to ever walk this earth.

See, Himmler envisioned the SS as a group of medieval knights who were both deeply religious and chivalrous, dedicated to the goals of conquest and conversion, men like the Knights of the Crusades.

For his own part, Himmler was obsessed with being the leader of these Teutonic Knights, the Grand Master.

Do you not believe that there is part of this is a function of ruling over people that are, would be considered your physical superior?

Perhaps.

I actually sometimes wonder if that's a part of what you see, which is that Heinrich Himmler likes the power position of telling built, vicious men what to do, and then he gets a little extra hard being able to do that.

And they can't do anything at him because he's the leader.

Yeah, I mean, well, Heinrich Kimmler always did want to project himself as this sort of manly man.

You know, he wanted to be amongst the tough boys in Germany.

Like when we talked in the first episode about the fencing, like we didn't quite get what it actually was, what fencing in Germany at the time actually was, what it involved.

It's the dumbest shit you've ever seen.

It's so incredibly stupid.

i mean it really just involves germans cutting each other's faces they slap each other with with swords with sharpened rapiers this is why at first we didn't bring it up because i thought it was just fencing like olympic fencing yeah but then it turns out this style of fencing was entirely different and it was it was a shallow exercise in getting men face scars so that they can look tough later on which is why so many nazis had facial scars because they purposely got facial scars in their fencing schools in order to look scary.

Oh, it's like when a rapper gets shot for cred.

Exactly.

That's exactly what it was.

And during these fencing competitions, they would actually have the like quote-unquote competitions.

They would actually have doctors on site to make the scars worse because they wanted to look tough.

That's why so many Nazis are fucking covered in scars.

Dude, have you seen?

And then the doctor come in.

I was watching footage.

one of these actual old fights.

And then the doctor's the scariest man you've ever seen because he's covered in fencing scars and he's seen coming up going like this whole ratcoat you know what i mean like do we is there another guy do we have another

his eyes like on backwards you know and he's just like yeah

and so yes i do think there is definitely something with himlar uh wanting to be

considered a man like he is the leader of the manly man even without having to actually do any of the things that it requires to actually be a quote-unquote manly man because they're very hard and very dangerous Yes.

But concerning Himmler's fantasies, in the end, what night fantasy is complete without an actual castle?

So to complete the dream, Himmler found his Camelot at a castle named Vevelsberg, located in an out-of-the-way location in northwestern Germany.

The foundations of Castle Vevelsberg dated back to the 14th century, but its isolation made it easy for Himmler to use slave labor from a nearby concentration camp to accomplish the incredible amount of remodeling that the place needed.

After Himmler's vision was realized, he made Vevelsberg the place where he could truly let all of his occult fantasies run wild.

Like, that's when I go to Club Met?

That's what I do.

Lots of candles, lots of sage.

Wevelsberg is an interesting thing because this is a thing the Nazis would do.

The Nazis would take old buildings and they would turn them into kind of like new strongholds.

And then now we're also seeing the advent of like Albert Speer doing the giant religious style, like this idea of we're going to live in eternity.

Because that's the key here is that the castle connects the Nazis to ancient times, but then the castle will stand quote unquote forever to bring the Nazis into future times.

The thousand year right.

Yes.

And so that's what all of this stuff is always about is building a thing that is so hard to destroy that it'll be there forever yeah and they always put it on the top of a mountain right like closer to god type of of thing.

Well, this one was already on one.

Yeah, I mean, it's, it's a lot of it is building on the foundations of what's already there.

But Hitler's, uh, his retreat, the uh, the Berghoff or something like that,

yeah, it was on top of a mountain as well.

That's where all the Nazis would go to hang out and you know, have their fun weekends together where nobody's sit to talk about the Jews because they give us a break.

Actually, well, no, they thought it was gauche to talk about the final solution when they were on vacation.

Oh, okay.

I mean, yeah, it's work.

Yeah, yeah, Live from North Way.

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Now, Himmler's castle was run as a sort of monastery where privileged SS men, Himmler's top knights, so to speak, could use it for retreats.

Unfortunately for the SS men, though, these retreats were all planned by Himmler, who would force his men to participate in weekends that were half LARPing and half pseudo-historical study.

Oh, I hate when a nerd owns the timeshare, right?

We all gotta go to school.

I thought we were drinking natty lights and finding horse.

But I guess if we don't have to do what I want to do, it's just, you know, I paid for it.

You know,

it's fine, you know, if we, if the group doesn't want to, it's just, you know.

That's absolutely fine.

It just seems that it would be a total waste of the Grail Room.

That is fine.

The thing is that Himmler did, in the end, create a perfect atmosphere to make all of his bullshit seem real.

In the remodel, Himmler had the entire castle complex adorned with runic designs that would set the mood.

But the castle centerpiece was the Grail Room.

See, Himmler and his followers were obsessed with King Arthur.

It's not just an Indiana Jones thing.

That shit was real.

Can I also say why?

It's because

they considered them to be like the pinnacle of white people.

Yeah.

And so they assumed that the other pinnacle of white people, according to them, of the height of the dynasties of England and UK, would be some hassle connect to Nazis.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So they looked up to the Brits.

In a way.

In a way.

The old white people, they looked up to the Celts.

And it's about separating the medieval from the modern.

Because they can always say, they can always kind of put a point, a stop point on anything and say, and that's the moment when the Jews took over that country.

And that's the moment when the races became too mixed.

And so they can...

pick a moment, whatever moment they want, and say, everything before that was great and we love it, but that's the moment, nah, I don't like that.

Yeah, because they didn't like the fact that they had built a whole thing, that they were that white aliens from space came down, fucked animals here, and made Jewish people and black people.

Like, that's kind of like one of the big things, and that's that was one of the big issues when Earth went wrong.

Yeah, man.

I mean, I agree.

Well, Himmler's followers believed that the Holy Grail was a magical stone of light that had fallen from the jeweled headband of an ancient sun god.

If one were to merely look upon this stone, Himmler believed, that man would live forever.

It's such a lazy way to become immortal.

Himmler was counting on his assumption that the grail would be found once the war finally began.

So he constructed a room in his castle with a large rock crystal in the center, illuminated from the bottom with electrical lights for effect.

This would be where the grail would one day be kept and utilized by only the most select of SS men.

Weibelsberg will never reach full potential.

And largely it's because of how the war turned out.

But you also, we got to remember, every single time they do something like this, the reason why Himmler is doing this is not for now.

It's for after.

Yeah.

This is for, this is supposed to be for after the war when Nazism has conquered everything.

Yeah.

And now this is the capital of Nazism.

And today, Weibelsberg is one of the largest youth hostels in Europe, which means it's just full of people of every single race, color, and creed.

Yeah, people just cornholing each other and doing whippets.

Since Himmler had, in effect, built a secret clubhouse for the SS, it was only logical that the clubhouse would be followed by all the rituals and accoutrements that go along with most secret societies.

Because why are you doing it in the first place?

If you're not going to have the cool shit.

Exactly.

It's a frat house.

Yeah.

Yeah.

These trappings, of course, only bound.

Well, I would actually say that the concentration camps are closer to frat houses than Weibelsberg is.

Veevelsberg is is more like.

Well, they have a lot of ice luges?

I did a lot of it.

And they have Jaeger.

They have a lot of Jaeger for it.

It's like I was talking about last week in Dachau.

Like, there was the frat boy atmosphere.

That was the concentration camps.

Veevelsberg

was, I guess, more of a Bohemian Grove type thing.

Like, it was where you went to do very serious things.

It was Vatican City.

It was the heart of the holy part of the Nazi Empire.

Yeah, Vatican City.

That would be a great comparison.

Club 33.

Yeah.

Thank you.

To translate to the Disney adults.

Well, these trappings, the accoutrements and the rituals, they only bound Himmler's men further to the SS, making them far more amenable to carrying out the atrocities that Hitler would ask them to commit in just a few short years.

And as it goes with secret societies, it also gave the men in the lower ranks of the SS a goal to work towards.

For example, every SS man with a membership number less than 2,000 had been gifted a death's head ring by Himmler, which made them all feel very cool and very special.

But if you joined after number 2,000, you could earn a ring by becoming a leader in the SS, and earning that spot usually meant that you had done or were willing to do horrible shit.

To further drive home that violence was at the heart of everything, Himmler also presented SS leaders with ceremonial daggers every November night.

My mom's birthday.

Wow.

Get a couple and then two days day before before.

Get a red tiger.

Yeah.

Day before my wedding anniversary as well.

Two days after Tootsie's birthday.

We could do this all day.

November 9th is also the anniversary of the founding of the SS.

Wow.

Happy birthday, mom.

I don't want to update her this year.

And during the presentation, Himmler would say this.

I confer on you the sword of the SS.

Never draw it without need.

Never sheath it without honor.

Preserve your own honor as unconditionally as you are committed to respecting the honor of others and to acting chivalrously to defend the defenseless.

Yeah.

Means nothing.

Yeah, yeah, because they don't defend the defense.

It's all horseshit.

He's saying a knightly thing to them to, again, this is all a part of an indoctrination process.

Yeah, and

this whole idea of like you're defending the defenseless is in Nazi ideology and the way the Nazis look at the world, the way they look at Germany, is that they're all defenseless and that they've all been put upon and they've all been attacked for thousands upon thousands of years.

They have this persecution complex because that's the only way that works.

Yeah, it's so contradictory because if they're defenseless, then why are they the master race?

Well, the idea is they carry,

it's holding the two in your hand.

Part about fascism is that it does not have to make sense.

Yeah.

Also, I think I made some sense out of the rings.

I'll tell you that much.

First 2,000 get rings.

He started.

He was like, oh shit, we're running out of rings.

You got to do something special.

If you want to ring,

anybody seem to have any around yet.

It's like merch.

It's like beer koozies?

The whole thing's merch.

It is.

It is.

But concerning, you know, the whole mass, the thing that seems like it's a contradiction with the master race, it's not.

It's actually

a feature of it because

the thing is about the Nazis, I think I said earlier, there is an engine, there's a motor within every Nazi, and especially within Hitler and within Himmler, is that, yes, we are the master race, and we've got to do everything we can to get back on top because we've been knocked down.

And those people over there, the Jews, they're so powerful that they have even managed to knock the master race down.

But we got to get back up again, and we got to do it as fast as we possibly can.

We can never stop moving.

We can never stop working towards that goal.

So yeah, feature.

Now, Heinrich Kimmler was obviously taking a lot of inspiration from the Crusades with his night fantasies, which the Crusades were a decidedly Christian undertaking.

Yes.

But that did not mean that Himmler was inspired by or was even tolerant of Christianity itself.

In fact, just like fellow top Nazi Joseph Goebbels, Heinrich Kimmler absolutely despised Christianity.

And we did talk a little bit about some.

So yes, there was obviously a lot of Christianity in Germany.

And yes, Martin Luther came from it.

What we were trying to even talk about is the idea that what Germany had specifically was a bunch of nomadic cultures that all had their own set of folk beliefs mixed in with whatever Christian stuff that's also sort of mixed in.

Yes, there were Christian enclaves, but the heart of the Germanic people was kind of still this vaguely up for the, up for grabs kind of like it failed.

A lot of the Christian stuff failed and a lot of it succeeded.

So it's really just where you found yourself, but you're also sitting next to all of these like magical ancient Germanic things that you're supposed to then consider.

Yeah.

And I, you know, and I'm very, I'm well aware, of course, that, you know, Austria was a very Catholic country.

Gonna get to that later.

But if you listen to what I actually said, perhaps I can say it fucking again, is that the Germans did not take to Christianity as much as the others.

The others.

Yes.

Like the Italians.

Or the English.

But that's what left a wide, this is why we're even talking about the occult angle of the Nazis again, is because they took that gap and filled it.

Because that was an extremely important part of the lore for the thing to last for 3,000 years.

The key here is that Nazism is supposed to last forever.

When this is over, Nazism is supposed to, once Nazism hits the world, they believe the whole world is going to be so excited to accept Nazism.

So they think that this is just the beginning of a new thing.

They're building something.

It's the beginning of the shit that people say like today and have even been saying for the last few decades is like, you know what?

You're just thinking it.

I'm actually saying it.

And that's what the Nazis think is that, like, once they think, once they get to America, they're like, oh, shit, look at how racist America is.

They're going to love us once we get there.

Like, we just have to get through a few people who we have to get rid of the communists and the Jews.

And once we do that, then America's the whole world is going to love it.

Well, Himmler's vision for the future of Germany was a completely de-Christianized country that had ancient ties to both the lost continent of Atlantis and the mythical Tibetan civilization of Shambhala.

And that is 100% true.

Yep.

These advanced civilizations, Himmler believed, have been destroyed or corrupted by the Jews, and the Nazis were the only remnants of their bloodlines left.

Because there's always white people in the Indian Ocean, and there's always white people in the mountains of Tibet.

Because they believe that during the flood, that was the only high ground.

Well, but that's the other thing, too.

You're also making, you're making a logical fallacy here, is that Aryan does not necessarily equal white.

Correct.

in their view, Aryan does not necessarily mean white.

But they're looking for white seeds.

Definitely looking for that.

Yeah, they want it.

Had to say that to get the Japanese on board.

Sure.

I guess.

That's actually one of those things that I know very little about and we will one day do because I do feel like that's the whole the jap the Japanese side of it.

I only know so much about it.

I don't really know how everybody got in bed together.

Yeah, that's for another time.

Yeah.

But as to why that bloodline did not continue indefinitely, the bloodline from Atlantis and Tibet, Himmler partly blamed that on the Teutonic conversion from paganism to Christianity, which was considered by Himmler to be history's greatest sin.

In his view, even though Charlemagne the Great had begun the first Reich with the founding of the Holy Roman Empire, Charlemagne's Christianity had prevented so-called Germanic virtues from unfolding to their full potential during the medieval age.

Now Himmler was born and raised Catholic, but once he learned that Christianity had its origins in the Middle East and that Jesus was logically a dark-skinned Jewish man, Himmler chose the ideas of the Volkish pseudo-historians over his childhood faith.

He just said, wait a little while, and then they would make Jesus into a Nordic Amorite that was a wizard that destroyed other rabbis.

You could do that too.

Yeah, that's all you got to do, buddy.

Yeah, but Himmler was...

Himmler, that's the thing.

I will say this.

Principled.

You can say nothing else about Heinrich Himmler.

Extraordinarily principled.

He stuck to his guns.

And additionally, once Himmler began forming his own own internal morality, he found that the core tenets of actual Christianity, charity, compassion, brotherhood, equality in the eyes of God, these were completely antithetical to Nazi ideology in every way.

This house chooses racial purity.

This home embraces piporborean qualities.

Our Jesus is white.

Now, in Himmler's mind, there was no way to square Christianity with Nazism, because Himmler, as I said, was far too principled to use the Project 2025 method of ignoring or twisting anything in the Bible that was inconvenient to his own goals.

So instead of using mental gymnastics to fit Christianity into his own morality, Himmler adapted Volkish ideas to create a religion that, in the words of one author, sprang from the forests of Germany.

Under Himmler's guidance, Nazism would have a state religion and a god that had ideally been worshipped by the ancient tribal Germans.

Which is, there wasn't one.

Yeah.

It was all over the the place.

That's what paganism.

That's what that's what paganism is.

Yeah.

Now, Himmler was smart enough to know that he couldn't just come out and tell the men of the SS, like, hey, we're worshiping the sun now.

Get with the fucking program.

Everybody shuts up and play volleyball.

That's like the Jew and new sports volleyball.

Yeah.

I mean, remember, like, Zeno doesn't come into Scientology until you're OT8.

You can't start with the hard shit.

You got to be stuck on that line.

So, to slow roll first his men and eventually all of Germany into his new belief system, Himmler wrapped the rituals that he created in Christian clothing in order to wean the SS off their Christian faith.

For example, Himmler believed that he could use sun worship to replace Christian rites like Easter and Christmas.

For the summer, Himmler planned a solstice festival to celebrate life, while the winter would be marked with a similar solstice festival to remember the dead and honor their ancestors.

It's like playing a game of the child and they just keep changing the rules till they win.

A lot of times that child can't send you to a concentration camp.

Yeah, Yeah, what if it could?

I know.

Oh, don't tell me.

If you put a bunch of children together and told them they were in charge, the children would become Nazis.

I know that they would.

Have you ever seen children on a playground in elementary school?

You know, they actually do describe when the pogroms first began in Germany and in Czechoslovakia, like they described the children as some of the most terrifying

people around when it came to, like, they would, like, you would see a pack of children chasing a Jewish man down the street.

So they could take, and they would, like, overtake him like fucking, like, just like a bunch of fucking animals.

Ortake him, like, you know, stamp him.

They would have sticks and just didn't just beat him.

I started watching a thing, but I knew I wanted to wait till the end of the series, but she talks all about that, about the deprogramming of the children of Nazi Germany.

It's actually very interesting.

Yeah.

You couldn't just beat them?

You know, that was the first go.

But that's what made the, that's what led to it in the first place.

That was the whole, but that was how the Germans were so inured to violence was because they had been beaten their entire childhoods, and they're like, oh, yeah, violence is fine.

What if we put them in camps?

But they're day camps, and we do things like we take canoes, and they play javelin, and they make, they make, but friendship bracelets.

The problem is a little thing called denazification.

You can actually listen to our series, the No Dogs in Space series on Cannes for more on that.

We actually went quite deep into denazification.

Hell yeah.

But it's a, yeah, it's a whole thing.

Now, once the ritual train got rolling, Himmler drew upon his Catholic heritage to come up with a whole host of customs and practices that would replace the Christian rituals that surrounded birth, marriage, and death.

These rituals were then forced upon Himmler's men in the SS, who practiced them dutifully and proudly.

Marriage ceremonies in Himmler's new religion, for example, would start with quotes from Hitler's speeches, followed by quotes from Friedrich Nietzsche's thus spake Zarathustra, and a short speech from a local SS leader.

Wow, that's so romantic.

Oh, you think that's romantic?

Did you not like it when I read The Power of the Will at your wedding?

Did you not like that when I read Stuart Garden at your wedding?

So Himmler's basically a comedy booker.

Yeah,

this does.

Here he looks like Joe List if he didn't eat vegetables.

Yeah, that's hot.

Got the poorest one, Eddie.

You just roasted the poorest one of that whole pack.

Really, Joe.

Well, if you think all that's romantic, the bride and groom would then light a candle as a sign of the commencement of a new Germanic bloodline.

That's why I did not do the candle ceremony, actually, in yours.

I was going to do it, and then I found it had some bad roots.

Thank you.

I appreciate that.

Thank you for cross-referencing that.

But at the end, instead of a kiss to seal the union, SS marriages would be marked with a hearty handshake.

I gotta say, wife, it's been a great time, and I can't wait to kill some Jews with you.

Put her there.

I love you, Marga.

Well, the handshake was to commit themselves.

It would commemorate a commitment to a shared life that worked solely towards the furtherance of the Nazi state.

Once the handshake was done, the marriage ceremony ended with everyone present signing the SS anthem of loyalty.

And if Heinrich Kemmler deemed the marriage important enough to attend, he would gift the couple a pair of silver goblets.

Bory!

So much merch.

Mm-hmm.

Now, once that newlywedded SS officer impregnated his wife in an act of functional Aryan sexual congress, the Nazi couple...

literally seem to be one of those where he has to put like the thermometer in her pussy to see if like if she's ovulating and stuff like that, you know.

Oh, yeah.

The Nazi couple would begin preparations for the inevitable birthing ceremony.

Yay!

Instead of a Christian baptism, a child would have a name consecration ceremony at an altar draped in a swastika flag under a picture of Hitler in a room decorated with black SS flags and Nordic runes.

Nothing says baby like runes.

The child would then be laid before the altar, and those present would speak excerpts from Mein Kampf aloud.

Although, the Nazis, by this point, and actually,

this was a new piece of information for me.

They had actually started working excerpts from Mein Kampf into song.

They had started making their own Nazi, basically, their own hymns.

And once finished with the Mein Kampf, whether it was spoken or sung, where Hermler should have come in, because you'd have been like, oh, child, that's not how you sing a song.

That's not how you sing a song, child.

You got to see, you got to clap your hands, child.

Once finished with the Mein Kampf, the constecrator would say, We believe in the God of the universe and in the mission of a German blood that grows eternally young from the German soil.

We believe in the nation, the bearer of this blood, and in the Fuhrer whom God has given us.

That sounded just like praise music.

That sounded like Christian, that sounded like a Christian song.

Now, child, now you're praising the Lord.

Now you're singing.

That's how I like to get you.

Move your feet back and forth.

Find the rhythm of the bass drum.

Then, at long last, Heinrich Kimmler himself would step in and present the baby with a silver cup and a silver spoon.

Here's your cup.

Here's your spoon.

Along with a large blue sash to commemorate the occasion.

If the kid was Jewish, he'd be like, what?

No fork?

This is my real sweet baby.

I'm just saying, if it's just a spoon,

it's not like I have soup for every meal.

You also see the spoon.

What is that?

Like, what kind of person do you think I just eat matzo ball soup every meal?

No, I have many different things.

It's a very, it's a varied and wide

menu for the Jewish people.

Jesus.

Himmler's hatred of Christianity and its brown origins were not his only motivation to create a Nazi religion.

There was also, of course, his hatred of the Jews and the ever-important concept of Liebensraum.

Himmler, however, had very cleverly worked out a way to link these two things together.

In fact, it was essential that he linked these two things together.

See, to Himmler, Hitler, and the rest,

the Jewish people were the so-called destroyers of culture.

Fuck, they are culture.

I need to understand.

We know this.

But Nazis do a thing.

You have to remember,

it seems vaguely familiar right now.

They say things that are opposite.

They do it specifically.

Think about Joy Division.

Think about these things that they do to make you think you're doing something good.

They call it something good.

So you're saying good words.

You're saying national socialist.

You're saying these things that would make sense.

They make sense in other...

concepts in another context.

They remove the context, they change the context, and now you're a different person.

Yeah, I just can't listen to that hippity hop music.

Nope.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And the Nazis are also, it's like, and this is, you know, very much,

I guess inspire or influenced by Himmler's just general way of being, is that the Nazis, once they get into power, they become the arbiters of culture.

They become the ones who say what is culture and what isn't.

Like there was even, I think Goebbels put on like an exhibition that was a,

what did he call it?

Like a, it was something, not deviant art, of course.

Which is Goebbels was the one taking all the deviant art and hoarding it and the fucking doing all the shit.

It was like Picasso and all those things, all the Impressionists.

Yeah, all the like Max Ernst.

Yeah, I can't remember what it was, but yeah,

they came in and they said, this is what culture is and this is what culture isn't.

And it just so happened that a lot of the culture that they hated was created by Jewish people.

Yeah, or people who were just fucking groovy.

Were they just assigned, or they just decided they had too much Jew thought in them?

Yes, that was also something that would be talked about.

Well, the Jewish people were seen as the eternal foil to the Aryans, and the Nazis believed that the sole aim of the Jews was to undermine and corrupt the culture of other races, simply because that was the nature of the Jew.

In fact, the Nazis looked at the whole Jewish question from a natural perspective, which is extremely important to understand, because it allowed the Nazis to speak about the Jewish people in terms that they believed were reasonable.

Nazis would very coldly and condescendingly say, you cannot blame a snake for being a snake.

I think that you would use the word basilisk.

But you would also not allow a snake to live in your home.

Some people have the laws of the I know snake people.

Well, if you were to say that, then they would say, well, if you were in a hotel and the bed was full of bed bugs, you would not take a single bed bug and say, this is a good bed bug.

You would merely exterminate all the bed bugs.

I have a hard time finding bed bugs.

Well, now you're just...

arguing with me for the sake of arguing.

Well, no, I'm arguing with a Nazi.

Yeah.

And I will say,

since time has gone on, there's plenty of people with swastikas that have have snakes in their hands.

They do really seem to be together.

They really do.

No, now that you mention it.

But the point is, is that they were trying to use nature as a way to say that all Jews were dangerous.

You can't say this Jew is one of the good ones.

You cannot take an individual one.

They all must be eliminated because they are all fundamentally the same, just as all snakes are fundamentally the same.

But the flip side of that is that the Nazis also looked at themselves from a natural perspective and from an animalistic perspective.

But once you make yourself an animal and you make everybody animals, you're very much prone to do some very awful shit to other people.

Well, also, it's having the veneer of civility.

Every single time they have an opportunity is having this idea that we are having a civil, science-based conversation about all things.

Everything must be.

And that's why when they say the destroyers of...

of culture were the creators of culture, they're legitimately creating the culture.

Like they are just saying that they're doing the opposite.

They're destroying the other culture and creating a new culture.

What if the snake was uncircumcised?

Again, this is a this is deeper.

This is a longer conversation.

We gotta get to episode seven.

Now we're going seven episodes.

Now naturally, not everyone in Germany was comfortable with the whole exterminate the Jews thing.

So the Nazis did not embark upon the final solution immediately upon entering office.

Instead, it was done in fits and starts throughout the 1930s, so as to not totally freak people out.

And also,

they're really relatively, as far as like the population goes, Jewish people made up like 1%

of the entire German population.

So if they started disappearing little by little, people aren't really going to notice.

See, even though Hitler had been saying in interviews as early as 1922 that he wanted to see the streets of Munich lined with the rotting corpses of hanged Jews, he said that

They love making things.

No, it's nice.

It's because it's funny.

It's comedy.

He's just fucking, he's just rattling cages, man.

Yeah, he's just rattling cages.

Yeah.

But there were many average Germans who didn't take him seriously.

Or they were at the very least willing to risk that Hitler was being serious if he gave them what they wanted.

It's like how people who have half supported Trump over the years have justified the awful things he's said and done by claiming that Trump is just, quote-unquote, playing to his base.

You're the base.

Yeah.

And while these people aren't necessarily bad, they're ignoring.

They're ignoring the troublesome stuff because they're hoping that he's eventually going to get around to their wants and needs.

Because they believe they're a part of a selected subclass that will be treated special by the authoritarian government.

And they don't understand that everybody, when everybody's a Nazi, everybody gets treated like a Nazi.

And Germany worked much the same way during the 1930s in the lead up to World War II.

But what the German people didn't know was that they were being deliberately slow-rolled into accepting the worst of the Nazis' goals, little by little.

Now, by the mid-1930s, Heinrich Himmler had spent years workshopping his ideas and beliefs within the SS.

So in 1935, it seemed like Hitler felt like his beliefs were ready to be taken to a wider audience.

See, besides just creating a new religion for Germany, Himmler wanted to create a whole new history.

And this to me seems like the far more important task when it came to getting the average German on board with concepts like Leibensraum, in which Germans would take the land of others as their own because it was their ancestral right.

And it wasn't, actually, it wasn't that too far off for what World War I was.

And if Himmler could create an atmosphere within Germany in which he could twist the truth to create proof that the Germans had lived in a region prior to the current occupants, then he could make the Germans believe that they were totally justified in eliminating said occupants, people like the Jews, the Polish, or the Russians.

And getting bigger and bigger.

And you had to create a fake past because the real past was that Germanic, the Germanic

various tribes ran different city-states in all this like very complicated like mountainous region and they all kind of believed in semi-different things and then the the spread of Christianity kind of half-worked and and it's kind of all this big mishigash of stuff.

Like it's not there is no central culture.

And it also just wasn't that impressive.

No, it's not.

They're they're mountain people.

They're just fucking they're just people.

They're just they're they're they aren't I'm sorry, Eddie.

I know that you were worried about this, but Aryans are not the super menshas that we thought we were, creating the whole world in their image.

How dare you?

I will say, in all of the research and documentaries I've been watching and shit,

Germany does look beautiful.

It is a beautiful country.

It's an absolutely gorgeous country.

It really is.

But it's to see, but we'll talk right now.

It's actually a feature.

It works in.

It works into the mythology perfectly.

Well, to replace Christianity and to justify the concept of Liebensraum, Heinrich Himmler founded an institution in 1935 with the goal of creating a new reality for not just the SS, but for the German people at large.

And then the world!

This institute was called the Anunerbe, and Himmler founded it with himself as superintendent.

Basically, the mission of the Anunerbe was to find new evidence of the great deeds and accomplishments of the Germanic people, evidence that had been sneakily hidden or destroyed by the Jews.

This evidence would then be conveyed to the German people through the media, social events, and scientific conferences.

The idea was that if the lie and the legend was told enough, backed by pseudoscience and pseudo-history, that felt right to the German people.

Because that's very important.

It has to feel right.

That's the key.

That is the key.

It has to feel right.

And if it feels right, then the Germans would be far more amenable to all of the horrible shit that Himmler had planned.

Unfortunately for millions, this turned out to be a very good bet on Himmler's part.

Now, unlike Himmler's secret SS Castle, the Anenerbe was set up to be a respectable institute in the eyes of the German people.

Its offices were in a nice villa in one of the wealthiest neighborhoods in Berlin, outfitted with all the latest technologies.

He wanted it to look nice and legit.

But Himmler also made sure that the Anenerbe had that mysterious occult edge that he added to almost everything save for the concentration camps.

The halls in the Anenerbe offices were decorated with photos of arcane carved wooden symbols, and plaster casts of ancient stones were scattered throughout so staff members could consult them before making big decisions.

Now, this makes it sound like the Ananerbo was just a bunch of kooks, but there were plenty of supposedly legitimate scholars who participated in Himmler's nonsense.

Partly, these people participated because they were too scared not to, but some of them very much wanted Himmler's alternate history to be true.

Because if it's all true, then everything can be excused and everything can have an actual rationale instead of what seems to be a giant maniacal global madness that they are caught up in.

Well, we're not even there yet.

Oh, yeah.

Like that's the thing.

Like we're like at this point.

It's the beginning.

It's just heating up.

Yeah.

It's bubbling.

At this point, it's not about justification.

At this point, it really is, and it cannot be stressed enough, it's about feeling better.

Because the German people feel like shit.

They were butthurt after what happened in World War I.

Super butthurt.

Yeah.

And they wanted to not be butthurt anymore.

Yeah, after losing World War I and the Treaty of Versailles and all the things that came afterwards, everyone's feeling real bad about themselves.

And they, and what the German people want more than anything else is to feel good about being German again.

Yeah, they want to feel better.

They should stop eating so many carbs and pork.

Well, that's what we learned, Eddie, but that took emotional maturity for us.

Well, to make all that happen, the staff of the Anna Nerbe wrote new histories of Germany that made people feel good about themselves while erasing the histories that made people feel bad, which is the same fucking thing that's been happening across America for the last few years in our educational system.

They went around looking for a German Stonehenge.

Yeah, they were obsessed with finding a German Stonehenge.

Something like that.

Because they loved Stonehenge.

They did.

Himmler loved Stonehenge, and he was so jealous of Stonehenge.

And all he ever wanted was a German Stonehenge.

So he sent out guys to go look for the German Stonehenge.

And so what'd they do?

Every single time they found a weird-looking rock, they would take a picture of it and say, ancient white people put this here.

Yeah.

And they would go, like, look at this rock.

Obviously, it's the shape of a lion.

This was carved in stone by the ancient white people that used to live here.

And they're the only ones who ever would have done it, even though it's just a rock.

Yeah.

Also, you look at the pyramids, you look at the stuff down that the Aztecs and the Mayans did.

White people had to do it.

Yeah, the Stonehenge kind of lay.

Yeah.

But they apparently, there ain't really much going on there.

Because you know why?

Well, because you know why?

It's because

Jews in the night.

It's like

it rained sideways.

It's because Jews in the night came from the sky and knocked down the super complicated parts of Stonehenge, buddy.

That's only the tip of Stonehenge, buddy.

That's the buttonhead.

That's the fucking penis top of Stonehenge Dog.

Truth is, the Jews built the pyramids.

Yeah.

What the fuck?

Well, the Ananerba, they had the assistance of the Gestapo, the German secret police, who would steal materials from universities and other institutions that would support either the creation of new history or the erasure of reality.

Those in academia who refused to cooperate with the Gestapo risked being sent to the camps, while those who willingly participated in the Anenerbe were often given high-ranking positions in the SS.

As far as those who refused went, Himmler would replace their positions in academia with SS officers, so the Nazi version of history could extend its tentacles into every aspect of education, from literature to the sciences.

We're going to make it a reality.

Now, when it came to Hitler using the Anenerbe to warp the past to fit his goals and beliefs, one of their biggest stretches concerned homosexuality.

They loved it?

It was big there?

They liked every second of it?

They did not.

Oh, weird.

Well, as we said last episode, Himmler considered male homosexuality to be a blight on society because gay men didn't usually have kids.

That was the whole reasoning behind it.

And fatherhood was considered to be one of the most patriotic duties that a German man could perform, especially in Nazi Germany, because, you know, they'd lost a lot of people in the war and they had to refill those population coffers somehow.

Well, yeah, the idea was they were going to kill all those pesky people there in the first place, and they were going to fill it with German people.

And that required lots and lots of big German babies.

Yep.

But Himmler also truly believed that you could catch being gay.

You can, buddy.

Yeah.

Oh, you can.

And guess what?

It's great.

Yeah, it's a catch-smith.

It looks great.

It's fucking awesome.

Dude, suck dick.

Don't ask questions.

Move on.

Gee-steak, move on.

Oh, yeah.

Himmler believed that male homosexuality was a communicable disease that would infect all of Germany if the Nazis didn't nip it in the bud.

Coming from the capital of Leatherdaddies, which I think is amazing.

Berlin is literally where I saw the most human male ass

on the street, man.

Yeah, they're making up for time there.

Very much so.

And so Himmler went to the Anenerbe and told them to find historical or scientific evidence to support the persecution of gay men, particularly.

Nothing, of course, was found.

But researchers did offer some speculation that a group of Iron Age Germans had maybe once executed their fellow tribesmen for homosexuality one time.

Now, that's thin gruel for evidence, but it was more than enough for Himmler.

He expanded upon that speculation and announced that the Anunerbe had found hard evidence that ancient Germans had drowned homosexuals in swamps as a matter of course.

Yeah, and we did it the old-fashioned way by putting

new bronze tints into the bottom of the swamps.

And the gay men couldn't help themselves.

They jumped in to find it.

You know, they are.

Homosexuality didn't even really exist as a concept until like modern times.

It literally was a

Alexander the Great was homosexual.

Yeah.

I mean, we don't really.

I mean, that's...

Yeah, they're wrong.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Fuck yeah, dude.

You're brave.

They're wrong.

No, your brain.

No, your brain.

No, your brain.

Thank you.

The Greeks were gay before God.

Yeah, dude.

The Greeks were so gay, they became Italian.

Now, once Himmler's belief...

That doesn't mean anything.

No, it doesn't.

It means nothing at all because the Italians, I believe, are famously homophobic.

I have no idea, dude.

It just fucking was in a, it was a pattern.

Yeah.

Uh-huh.

It followed a pattern.

Now, once Himmler's beliefs about homosexuality were quote-unquote confirmed, he began sending gay men to concentration camps where they were forced to wear the infamous pink triangle badges.

It's really kind of hard now you see that because you like obviously this very, very serious thing.

And then we had that song

Pink Triangle on a slave.

Well, I know that because

you know what that song does.

No, what this, but that's well, the pink triangle.

I quit.

I quit the show.

I'm done.

But just like LGBT people say.

He jumped right in, baby.

But

just like LGBT people today have been used as the vanguard for bigotry in this administration, gay men were actually among the first group to suffer Nazi human experimentation.

This was all so the Nazis could see if they could turn gays into straits, and they did so through a variety of horrific methods, including, but not limited to, chemical castration.

Reportedly, 15,000 gay people were sent to concentration camps, and 60% of them either died there or were killed during the course of the experiments.

Is that another track on that Weezer album?

It's not, not at all, not at all.

The song, or what it, because the gay people, like, they took the pink triangle, you know, as a thing of power, and then it's all about how he's an idiot, an idiot.

Rude Coleman was an idiot.

Yeah, I understand.

Yeah.

I'm your lesbian.

Great.

Well, Himmler put homosexuals, people with biological defects, and women who got abortions all in the same criminal category.

They were all people who were actively working towards the destruction of Germany because they were not making more Aryans.

We would put them in the category of groovy cats that must be destroyed.

Arresting these people, Himmler said, was a preventative act.

But most chillingly, Himmler made it very clear that this mission would never end.

As Himmler put it in public, thinking that all this would be over in years or even decades was, quote, reckless and erroneous.

In other words, just like it is today with, say, these new leaks from the young Republicans where they're all talking about, I want to burn people, I want to gas people.

That's traditional, funny stuff amongst kids.

They are saying exactly what it is they're planning and exactly what they believe.

out loud.

It is, however, ultimately the responsibility of the average citizen to take these people at their word when they say it, as opposed to, say, sweeping it under the rug again because you're annoyed at how fucking expensive milk is.

Get your priorities known.

Nazis tell you exactly who they are, and you need to listen.

If you are a lot, and I can't say this fucking strongly enough, if you have the strength to stand in front of a swastika-based flag, then we need to think about that because swastikas are a no-go in the United States of America.

And I don't fucking give a fucking shit what you think about it.

Man, I'm so sick of these interviews with the fucking guys from the South calling them swastikers.

Yeah, they die.

You know what I mean?

People got swastikers all over the place.

You know, just fun-looking eggs.

That's all they call a double one.

They just think it's five pot stickers.

Yeah.

Now, the Nazis had a thing for blood in both the metaphorical and literal senses.

But under Himmler's direction, the Anunnerba viewed Aryan blood as an actual magical elixir.

And another example of Himmler getting an idea and telling the Anunnerba to figure it out, he believed that the blood that flowed through his Aryan ancestors' veins was what had supplied them with their heightened powers of creativity and intelligence.

Himmler, therefore, believed that if the Anunnerba could somehow crack the code of synthesizing pure Aryan blood, then that blood could heal all illness, transform those of mixed blood into pure-blooded Aryans, and produce superior livestock.

It's all-in-one.

You mean there's something that could finally make me white?

Actually, I do believe that this, that

turning someone of mixed blood into pure Aryan blood, I think that's why Himmler wanted it so bad because he knew deep down that he was not in any way Aryan.

He did not have any Aryan features whatsoever.

And I think he thought that if he found his magic potion, he could drink it and he could somehow be that beautiful blonde boy that he wanted to fuck so bad.

Can someone please Photoshop me an image of Heinrich Himmler taking the Aryan blood and turning him into a giant titted, beautiful blonde Aryan woman with the mustache?

Like if he could look like a beautiful big titted like beer wench like that.

And then he's just like, oh no, I used the wrong blood.

And then all of a sudden, we had a Nazi Freaky Friday.

Yeah, actually, well, you want a man.

Yeah, it's Freaky Friday, meets weird science, meets zone of interest.

Yeah, wow.

Yeah.

Write it down.

Pitched.

Copyrighted.

Mailed it to myself.

Done.

Now, again, this sounds ridiculous, but in Himmler's eyes, the discovery of pure Aryan blood was one of the Third Reich's greatest works.

And he recruited scientists, anthropologists, musicologists, zoologists, astronomers, doctors, and folklorists to try to make it happen.

All the Aryan blood, though, is at the bottom of the ocean.

If you've been in Atlantis, if you believed it.

Well, it's about synthesizing it.

It's about figuring out what it is.

First, you figure out what it is, and then you figure out how to make it.

Germans love synthesizers.

They do.

Fucking top shelf, bud.

Top shelf.

They do.

Now, Himmler's actions surrounding homosexuality and Aryan blood, these are just two examples of the corticopia of insane tasks that were undertaken by the Anunnerba.

They're also very much on the tamer side of things when you consider the Anunnerba's logical conclusion.

See, when the Allies finally raided the Anunnerba offices in 1945, there were definitely a lot of questions like, hey, where'd all these skeletons and skulls come from?

You guys have a lot of skeletons and skulls around.

Yeah, thank you.

Yeah, it's kind of a thing here.

You know, it's kind of a mode.

It's like a memorandum.

Well, where'd you get them?

I inherited them from the man that I murdered.

I've never heard of this place.

Spirit Halloween.

There was also quite a few questions about the Anunerbis correspondence with a so-called doctor working out of Poland named Joseph Mengela.

Mengela!

But unfortunately,

you don't like it?

You don't like it anymore.

You know, it does

run me the wrong way a little bit.

Just a bug.

There's that smile on your.

You know, that jack-o'-lantern of a fuck.

Yeah.

What was he doing?

Let's continue.

But unfortunately, the full extent of the Anunnerba's works are still a mystery.

961 volumes of Anan Araba files survived the war, but this was only a fraction of what they had before they started burning files during the final Allied advance.

that's how many files they had that's how many files the not and that really shows you the scope of the ananerba the scope of the holocaust scope of the concentration camps the gestapo all of it is that the germans there were so many germans who could see the russians coming could see the americans coming knew that the war was over and were just constantly burning shit constantly trying to get rid of it and they didn't even come close to getting rid of all the evidence yes well i actually feel like especially with the ananerba of all of them to be honest, I think a lot of it was gobbledygook horseshit.

Like, I think most of it was them with various skulls.

Because, like, one thing, one big project of the Anna Nerba was to go to Tibet and measure the skulls of every single Asian person that they met.

Sure.

Because they were desperately looking for any form of Nordic sign inside of these cultures.

And they would go meet, which should have been, that's an interesting movie of the Nazis that went to Tibet.

And they said they earned the trust of the Tibetan people so much that they lived amongst them, ate with them, hung out.

Some stayed.

They literally fell in love with Tibet, but then they measured everybody's heads and they were so excited by these new people showing interest in them.

They fed them, they gave them all these like celebrations and they went and they literally like made all these plaster casts of all these different types of Asian people.

Oh, they should do it.

They should be called Tibet Your Ass Roll Nazis.

Yeah.

Hilarious.

Well, I mean, you got you have kind of half of the story there.

Is that, yeah, they did go and the Tibetans were like, oh, you love the swastika?

We love the swastika.

That was great, yeah.

And then eventually, like, someone

will eventually someone from like outside showed up and like, hey, what are you doing hanging out with Nazis?

And they're like, What are Nazis?

Uh,

they're fine.

It's like, you know what, what they do, right?

Like, what the what they're and then they told the Tibetans, like, all of the shit that the Nazis did.

They're like, Okay, so we need to stop hanging out with these guys now.

Like, yeah, you should probably stop hanging out with them.

Yeah, that's dancing in the beach boys.

Yeah,

it's so funny, though, because they went, and there's like, how do you say, like,

there's a teaching moment here guys?

Guys, but guess what they found?

Nothing.

Nothing.

Now while much of the more nefarious experiments of the Anunerba were lost, the work they did rewriting history was a matter of public record before the war even began.

See, there were two big question marks when it came to buying the concept of a history in which the ancient Aryan Germans with a superior race.

And I'm not even just talking about worldwide.

I'm talking about just in Europe.

Yeah, you're not talking about Africa or the Middle East.

No, or South America.

Those question marks were Rome and Greece.

See, it was already well established that while the Romans were building the Colosseum, the Germanic tribes were struggling to make a piece of pottery that didn't look as if it was crafted by a very gifted child.

And the Germanic tribes sort of did the thing where they burned Rome down as it collapsed, and that led us to a little thing called the Dark Ages, which was a period of time in which we don't know exactly how long it lasted, in which there was no communication across the country.

So it kind of was also kind of their fall in a way.

The Gothics.

The little

well, oh, no, not the Vandals.

The Vandals and all of the barbarian clans.

Well, to sidestep all of these inconvenient truths, the Germans changed history itself by claiming that the accomplishments of Rome could be traced back through time immemorial to blonde-haired migrants from the north.

It's got to be.

Northern Europe.

It's got to be.

Yeah.

Well, Northern Europe, the Nazis claimed, was too damp to properly cultivate the genius of the Aryans.

It's too wet.

Take cold.

Get me.

I'm like that.

I'm like that.

I can't.

I I can't be wet.

I can't be wet.

Yeah.

I need to think.

Anything.

Anybody dry anything?

Yeah.

So the Aryans were forced to migrate to the Mediterranean where the weather was better.

And then once they got a little sun, once they got a little bit of just like, oh, this, oh, I got it so nice here.

They founded Roman Greece.

But the mixing of the races eventually diluted their Aryan blood, which is why the Romans and the Greeks were no longer Aryan.

There were snowbirds.

Yeah.

Permanent snowbirds.

Yes.

See, white people just they love to move and they go to all of it, and they just love to help,

so they go to places and they just help, and that's what they do.

And then they just ran away, right?

And it's not like being fucked out of existence.

It's like it just seems to be if every single time an Aryan tribe arrives and then fucks itself out of existence, maybe we need to learn something from that as well.

Well, the argument, the counter, the Nazi counter-argument to that is we have learned something, and that something is we must kill every Jew on earth.

Yikes!

And that's why I say, oh, child, that's not what you're supposed to think, child.

You need to have yourself a nice plate of pasta, child, in Italy.

Well, but that, but seriously, that is the idea.

This keeps happening again and again, and it will keep happening unless we kill all of them.

Now, incredibly, the German people ate this shit up.

As far as reasons go, One of the biggest motivators for believing all this was that many Germans, like I said, desperately needed to feel better about themselves after the humiliation of losing the First World War.

In some ways, many Germans lost their minds after World War I, just as many Americans were utterly broken by 9-11.

And people stuck in this frame of mind will do and believe just about anything if it makes them feel better about their national humiliation.

We all know somebody who was never right again after 9-11.

Yeah, Matt Lauer.

But the other side of why these people believed in the alternate histories was because the Nazis crammed all this shit down people's throats through propaganda and Nazi-controlled media.

So-called historical articles that rebranded history through a Nazi lens were a regular feature in the official SS newspaper, SS Guidebook.

As an aside, though, these Nazi newspapers were fascinating artifacts.

According to one writer who studied SS Guidebook, it combined dime store pulp, hardcore political doctrine, sexy photos of Frauleins in swimsuits, quotes from Mein Kampf, and even even a dear Abbey-style column that offered tips to SS men who were looking for suitable Aryan brides.

Have you thought of just taking them?

God, you just needed it.

You know, it's very interesting is that they're obviously they had a very good eye for marketing and tone.

Yeah.

So one of the things they understood was to kind of keep it almost on an entertaining, hyper-optimistic-like way, right?

This idea of all these horrible things are happening.

But when you are listening and talking and reading Nazi content, it's entertaining, positive.

It's extremely positive.

It's very like, and well, obviously it's talking about violence, but in a positive way.

It's like, it wants you to get all like gummed up for it.

It wants you to go.

And then they also had the ability to completely cut off all the spigots of any other type of information coming in.

You know, there's no internet.

There's nothing coming.

There's no way for you to know that this is ain't really just an ever-pervasive reality necessarily.

And then they are starting to make stuff look really intense.

Mm-hmm.

Now, while Heinrich Himmler certainly had a lot of ideas, he did not create the foundation for all of these narratives.

As we said in the first episode, many of these concepts came from books Himmler had read in his 20s.

But as he gained more power in Germany, some of the authors of those books, and this is just this is your dream, they became Himmler's collaborators.

He's like, oh, I was such a huge fan, and I can't believe I get to work with you, Mr.

Willigott.

I'd be like if we got Schechter on the show.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Well, as such, when Himmler began rewriting history and science with the Anenerbe, he included some of those writers.

And while there were some real crackpots in the Institute, none were more cracked than Carl Maria Willigut.

Fucking Willigut, this fucking guy.

Yeah.

Born in 1866, Carl Maria Willigut, or I guess it's Billigut.

Willigut?

Yeah, it was like really good.

Carl Maria Rilligood.

My name's Carl Rilligood.

How you doing?

Oh, look at how happy he is in his uniform.

He does look like a good old boy.

Yeah, he was a World War I veteran who claimed to have genealogical links to both the Norse god Thor and to a German tribal chief who had slaughtered three Roman legions in the year nine.

Carl was also an occult author who had been an early influence on Heinrich Himmler's own occult beliefs.

But just like many people in Himmler's inner circle, Karl was also certifiably insane.

Largely the craziest one.

Yeah.

After fighting on both the Italian and Eastern fronts during World War I, Karl retired from military service after spending 40 years fighting for the Austro-Hungarian Empire.

Of course, after World War I,

no more Austro-Hungarian Empire.

Yeah, what do you do then?

You become bitter on my credits for this Austro-Hungarian Empire.

And so he joined his local Austrian right-wing paramilitary group and became a violent, unpredictable alcoholic who always carried a loaded revolver.

Carl was also a suspected incestuous pedophile who was so inappropriate with his daughters that his wife had locks installed on their doors to keep Carl away.

Hey, at least she did something.

Yeah.

At least there's that.

Yeah, yeah.

She could have also, like, you know, stabbed him in the throat while he slept, but at least he put locks on the doors.

He's daddy.

He's also like Paul Atreides because he believed that he could see into the past.

He believed that he had access to every single white person's memory, and he was attached to a thing called the racial soul.

And the racial soul was what the essentially it's a collective unconscious only for white people.

Yeah.

And it's for white people's history.

And he could look into the past at any time and confirm anything that Himmler said because he could see it

These fat fucks they just make up anything to make them sound cool.

Yeah, yeah

Eventually Carl became so out of control that his wife had him committed to an insane asylum sometime during the early to mid-1920s where he told anyone who would listen that he had single-handedly defeated every communist there ever was whilst committed good work Carl.

Wow.

Whilst committed Carl also obsessively collected pebbles and very small rocks which he carried in his pockets at all times.

In his room, Carl would polish and arrange these rocks, thousands of them, lined up in rows.

He would give each rock a representation, like that one's a snake, that one's an eagle, that one's a really big dick.

Another times, he would give a stone a larger, more abstract meaning, like this stone represents the battle between the forces of light and darkness.

Very important stone.

Carl,

I fucking hate you.

Shut up, Carl.

Stop polishing your rocks.

Obviously, if I was polishing them, I will be putting them in the camps.

After a few years in the insane asylum, Carl was finally released in 1927.

He was done.

Yeah, and he immediately found himself drawn to the growing Volkish and Nazi movements.

Wow.

There he found like minds and began calling himself Weiss Thor, which just means wise Thor.

I would love for anybody to go onto TikTok and take stills from trad what hashtag trad wife content, make it black and white, and put it of pictures next to the Volkish movement, and tell me if you can see the difference.

I really would like you to sit to see if you can see the difference between the two of those.

Within the Nazis, Carl found a group who would actually honor his request to be called Weist Dor.

I mean, he kept insisting.

Yep, that group was, of course, Himmler's SS.

Always go where you're welcome.

Yeah.

But rather than just humor the old man, they encouraged his claims.

Himmler and his SS men actually believed Carl when he said that he could channel ancient Nordic figures by entering seizure-like trances.

I'm like, I'm pretty certain it was seizures.

Yeah, yeah, it could have been.

And they listened carefully when he would come out of those seizures and recite primeval adages, sayings, and proverbs that he claimed to have received from the ancestors.

The Jew is like

the rotten turnip.

God, you're a wise thought.

It is always grown in the wrong places.

Also, this just should never hang out with people that let you pick your own nickname.

Never.

Ever.

Ever, never.

Never.

You should.

You can't tell anybody you're nicknamed.

Like, oh, who does that bit?

Isn't that Eddie Innocert who does a bit about Sting?

No, that Dana Carvey does.

Yeah, Dana Carvey.

Like, okay Gordon.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There was also a whole Seinfeld episode about it.

T-Bone.

Yeah, T-Bone.

And he gets nicknamed Coco.

Well, again, all of this sounds ridiculous, but Carl Willigutt attracted a large following in the Volkish German scene, and by 1933 he had become a friend to none other than Heinrich Hemmler, who was somewhat of a Villegutt fanboy, vis a Guthead.

Carl would bring Kimmler old books and manuscripts bound in pig leather that, according to Carl's claims, contained all his accumulated occult knowledge.

And suppress ports as if you're hungry, you can fry it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I love a book you can suck on.

And the great thing is that this is how you keep the Jews from reading it.

Yeah, you can't even touch his name.

Using these books and Carl's channeling techniques, Himmler and Carl made decisions as to where to place SS training camps and headquarters in locations that were most magically suitable.

At least magically suitable according to the ancestors.

You know what we are doing?

Very important decisions were made based on Carl Willigutt's seizures.

We're also discounting Hitler here because,

yes, Hitler only had shallow belief systems

in any aspect, but Himmler also knew to pitch Hitler, you needed a full storyline.

Like if you're going in there to pitch Adolf Hitler,

you better come really ready to talk about the whys and wheres of what you want to do.

Because Hitler was like that.

He did no work, but he wanted to know everything.

So you'd show up and you'd need reasons.

So I think partially with Willegut, it gives again, gravitas to the decisions we're making over here.

Yeah, you got to know what's going to happen in season five.

Yeah.

literally.

Yeah.

And Himmler's other technique with Hitler that worked extraordinarily well is that Himmler would go in and basically be like Hitler's pitching post.

Like he would go, like, he would wait until Hitler was very angry, and then he would go in and he would let Hitler scream at him for hours upon hours on end.

And he would just take it and be like, yes, yes.

And then finally.

And they are misunderstood.

Yeah.

They don't listen to you and they don't get you.

Yeah.

And then finally, when Hitler got tired himself out, that's when Himmler were going, like, oh, hey, I got this idea.

And Himmler's like, Hitler's like, yeah, yeah, fucking, whatever.

Fine, fine, get out of here.

Just go.

I'm tired.

And it worked again and again and again.

And that also brought Hitler closer to Himmler.

Himmler was his me.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Now, the problem with Carl Willigutt and him and Heinrich Himmler's working relationship is that while Himmler was a vivacious and excitable 33-year-old Nazi, Carl was already 66 and getting quite tired by the time they started working together.

So to keep Carl going, Himmler supplied Carl with drugs.

Now we don't know exactly what Himmler gave Carl, but considering how just about everyone in Nazi Germany was on meth during this time, Carl was probably gacked out of his skull.

Yeah, he was able to do cartwheels and shit.

Yeah, dude.

That's the fucking shit, man.

Getting that IV meth when you're an old man.

Sign me up, dude.

Dude,

well, the Nazis, it was a little pill.

I can't remember what it was called.

It was like pee-pee or something like that.

But yeah, it was a little pill that was made and everyone got it.

That's how the blitzkrieg worked.

Like, that's how they were able to blitz Krieg France because every single one of them were on meth and they didn't have to sleep, and so they just went for days upon days on end.

But then, I was reading that Blitz book, and they talk about how then they burn out, yeah.

Then, when the burnout hit, that's like when the Nazis started hardcore losing, like, literally, watch an entire army get burnt out.

It sucks because they're taking all that meth, they would have loved being gay, right?

Right?

And then, with the haircuts, too, The haircuts look like they look like every bear in Weehoe.

Well, luckily, hop to the gills on speed.

Carl claimed to channel ascended masters of the occult, just like Madame Blavatsky had claimed to do.

In reality, Carl probably just stolen Blavatsky's act.

Of course.

But as opposed to Blavatsky, Carl's ascended masters only had apocalyptic visions, which made Himmler believe with even more fervor that the Nazis and specifically the SS needed to wipe the Earth clean of all bad influence in advance of a future planet-wide catastrophe.

Couldn't even wipe his own ass.

You don't know.

He might have loved wiping his ass.

He was a rag on a stick, man.

Now, while Carl was on Himmler's wavelength ideologically, Carl obviously did not have what you'd call an administrative mind.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

He was basically a rambling homeless man that smelled like a barn.

He literally was this disgusting, rambling, insane old man.

And his family had abandoned him.

Yes, yeah.

Himmler just happened to find him hilarious.

Himmler used him as like

it's his response.

Yeah.

It's his mysterious source of all his ancient knowledge that no one can really cryptically understand.

Only Himmler can, and he's the only one who can translate to everybody.

Also, when he stands next to him, he doesn't look as fat.

Yeah, honestly.

Yeah, Himmler has the fattest head of a skinny boy I've ever seen in my life.

It's just so incredibly weird.

Yeah,

he's got that.

Adam Scott head.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He's skinny, but he's like, but he is fat.

Like, that's the thing about Himmler.

Like, he's got a little pouch.

Yeah, it's called these in management.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Just out of shape.

The Killsbury Doughboy.

That's hilarious.

While Carl Billigutt was a great ideas guy, he didn't really have the wherewithal to actually run something like the Anenerba.

And Himmler's duties with the rapidly expanding concentration camp system and the Gestapo, oh, that was taking up quite a bit of his time in the mid to late 1930s.

So Himmler stepped down from his position as superintendent of the Anenerbe and created the position of president for a 50-year-old prehistorian named Herman Wirth, who, if you look at him, had the appearance of an old-timey scientist whose explosions constantly blew up in his face and covered him in soot.

And that kind of gave him cred.

Yeah.

He looks like somebody the Daffy Duck would chase after.

Oh, look at that moustache.

Yeah.

God, he looks so dark.

Oh, nice loose.

Yeah, he looks like a Confederate, like a Confederate soldier.

I do, man.

But I will say, I am really good at having it up to here with these Nazis.

Yeah.

Yeah, they're a pain in the ass.

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Now that's not to say that Herman Verst was not an ideas guy as well, because everyone in the Anunnerba was, shall we say, full of ideas.

Full of ideas.

See, Herman was very much into the idea of creating an Aryan religion, and he told Himmler that he had a treasure trove of ancient sacred texts written by the Nordic race, texts that Hermann himself had quote-unquote discovered.

Hermann's motivations for creating the religion, however, were more in line with your average German.

See, Herman had become disillusioned with Western civilization as a whole after Germany lost World War I.

Hermann believed that civilization was spiraling towards an inevitable collapse, but he also believed that he could prevent this collapse if he, quote, recovered the truths of the past.

To Hermann, his work with the Anenerbe was not just important, but existential.

And the fervor with which Herman spoke and wrote about ancient Aryans led people to call him the Hitler of German scientists.

Whoa.

Which is one hell of a nickname.

Hell yeah.

You know what I'd say?

You're the Hitler of research podcasts.

I don't want that nickname.

I'm the Hitler of sideman comedy.

Oh, yeah.

And I just struggled in the bathroom.

You're the people of the downstairs shitter bathroom.

Because we have, obviously, as you know, downstairs is the shitten bathroom, upstairs is the pissin bathroom.

That's right, man, because it goes down.

Yep.

Trickle-down effect.

It's closer to the river.

Do you think that Herman was trying to convince everyone?

Say, did you know that it used to be called Harmony?

Yeah.

I don't know, Herman.

I used to switch it.

It used to be Harmony.

Now by the time Heinrich Himmler had established the Anunnerba in the mid-1930s, Hermann Wirth's star was on the wane.

He was nearly bankrupt and inching towards debtor's prison, so Himmler used SS funds to bail Hermann out, thus creating another loyal man who owed Himmler his life.

Now Hermann was partly hired to lead archaeological expeditions outside of Germany because any and all attempts made by Annanerba researchers to find evidence of past Aryan superiority within their own borders had only produced a lot of shitty Iron Age pottery.

So, under Hermann's guidance, the Anunnerbe began making expeditions all over the world, although Himmler was smart enough to give Herman orders that you do not discuss politics with anyone outside of Germany.

So fascinating because it shows that he knew that there was a problem with it.

Yes.

But using Herman as his frontman, Himmler could fully explore his growing obsession with Tibet.

Now, Himmler's interest in Tibet was not original amongst occultists who subscribed to the Aryan myth.

As we mentioned, Madame Blavatsky had kicked off the idea that Aryans had originated in Tibet, and countless other crackpots had run with it.

As such, Himmler believed that the Aryan race had built an empire in Central Asia, the mythical Shambhala.

And using a particularly Nazi brand of circular reasoning, Himmler believed that the symbol of Aryan Shambhala had to have been the swastika.

It had to have been because it's the here-now.

Well, I.

It's the swastika.

Yeah.

You know,

swatskers up in Turbet.

You know what's up in the Nerger or other man?

I don't use no brown sauce with my swastika.

Hey, it is right there, right?

Hey, you know what they say?

Swatzker marks the spot.

Right right there.

It's where I get my brow worst.

Shambhala was not a metaphor to Himmler, nor was it even a myth.

He truly believed that Tibet was the last refuge of the Aryan root race, that there were still, even in the 1930s, Aryans tucked away somewhere in the Tibetan mountains.

So Himmler tasked Anunnerba researchers with finding these remaining original Aryans.

Once found, the Nazi researchers were instructed to leave behind a radio transmitter so the Aryans could make contact with Berlin.

And once the bond was established, the ancient Aryans could teach the Nazis how to mine substances to prolong their lives and how to build psychic conductors to reach higher states of consciousness.

Because Volkish writers had told them that's what ancient Aryans knew how to to do.

I will say it's a big Hail Mary Pass.

It seems like that little trip's gonna wrap up a lot of stuff.

He's like, Zen wants to go, and somebody gets machines, somebody gets the hidden elements and see Asia Mountains, some make a super powerful Zen.

They're good.

We just got to dishes.

We just need X, Y, Z to happen.

And so we're good.

And if you go there, you go to Tibet, you find me a yodeling monk.

Yeah, please.

You'll find me as a man stuck on a plateau with wooden shoes, and he has no idea why he is there, white as hell.

This expedition, however, almost didn't happen because the guy they put in charge of it accidentally shot and killed his wife during a duck hunting trip right before they set off.

Sure.

Yeah, I mean, tell me about it.

I've heard that excuse nine times.

Excuse me, wife, could you put this duck on your head?

The researcher, however, pulled himself together after eight weeks of grieving.

They then set off for Tibet.

But nothing, of course, was found.

Now, Nazi theories about the past didn't stop with the creation of the races and where they originated.

Nazis even had their own ideas about how the Earth itself was formed.

And amongst the Nazis, the most widely accepted creation story was the World Ice Theory.

Now, the creator of the World Ice Theory was a man who was.

Oh, it wasn't Anheuser-Busch?

No, it was not.

He was a man who was regarded as a complete idiot by legitimate astronomers.

And that is a quote: This man was an Austrian with the absolutely terrible name of Hans Hohrbigger.

I'm a whorebiger.

My liars also a partner.

Yeah, I'll never think's cold at first.

That's like a guy who...

It's like a fat man who orders a prostitute.

I need my whorebigger.

Honestly,

more, to be frank, and more specifically, I'm a whore wider.

Horbigger had the reputation of being an idiot because he openly bragged that his world ice theory involved no actual math or science.

Because math and science were, quote, too Jewish and deceptive.

What is the number four?

Is it found in nature?

What is the number seven?

Is it found naturally amongst the trees?

I love how there's becoming truth to Hitler on ice.

As you can imagine, his theory was indeed moronic, but it did serve as an important piece of the history that Himmler was constructing with the Anunnerba.

Well, it's more rhyming doctrine with the past.

This idea that there is the Hyperborean island, right?

There's Hyperborea, which is the ice-bound island that the mystical white people first sprung from, right?

That went down, that where Iceland would be, right?

So that's...

Iceland, yeah.

And Iceland does not like the fact that Nazis retconned a lot of their lore.

Well, yeah, but they're taking the poetic edda and saying that, oh, this is actually the history of the area.

No, they don't know.

They don't enjoy that.

They don't like that.

They really don't enjoy that.

They're really anxious.

Because the poetic edda is a beautiful work of literature.

But they, yeah, they don't like it.

They just turn it into whatever they wanted it to.

So these guys are all doing it.

So that's another rhyming thing to the ice world that they all came from.

Well, basically, the world ice theory held that the Earth had started with six moons made of ice.

And I'm really taking this down to its basics.

Yes, because this is just an anime.

Yeah.

What you're describing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

One by one, these moons were pulled down to Earth through gravitational forces.

We must defend the authority forces of negativity.

Yes, I'm in charge of kissing.

I have the energy of hugging.

I have the energy of whistling.

The music caused incredible destruction and change each time.

That's one of the things that they would say about, oh, the Bible, one of the only true things about the Bible, is that the flood did happen, but it was because a moon made of ice fell into the ocean.

But what was important to the Nazis...

Did you know that the first Jews were snowmen?

Yeah.

But what was important to the Nazis is that the fifth moon had come down 11,000 years ago, and it had been this moon that had destroyed Atlantis.

Now, you might be saying that this totally negates their other belief that Atlantis was destroyed by the Jews.

We talked about it, I think, in episode one or two.

Yes, that Atlanta, it was the Jews and the Slavs working together that had sunk the city or sunk the continent of Atlantis.

Well, you'd be right.

The first space laser melted the ice moon.

I don't think you understand.

You're right.

I actually don't think he understands that the first space lasers were natural from an invading Jewish star, and that's where you're incorrect, where the space lasers were then built by modern Jewish cabals

in order to compare to the ancient Jewish star that destroyed the six moons of white ice.

I'm so sorry.

Thank you for the clarification.

You're the Endgum!

Well, you'd be right for pointing out those contradictions.

But an essential part of being a Nazi, and an essential part of being a part of any fascist system, is that you had to be able to hold a a lot of contradictory ideas in your head all at the same time while never questioning said contradictions.

See, it's not necessarily about what is true as much as it's about what can be true.

Just so long as what can be true constantly feeds back into the central ideas of the movement.

Like, oh yeah, so that makes sense.

Yeah, I could see that.

Yeah.

And it just goes on and on and on.

It all just gets added up and until nothing is true.

And everything is true at the same time.

You're also being,

you're physically frightened.

Yeah.

And so you now know that to cut the physical fear of being inside of the fascist machine, you have to say yes.

And that's just most of those things because everyone makes a big talk of when the Nazis come, you're going to fight.

But actually, it's like very uncomfortable to fight them.

Oh, yeah.

Because they send you to concentration camps.

Well, it's not, I mean, just think of it on a very human level.

How many times have you been in a conversation with somebody and they say some really awful, off-the-wall shit?

And you gotta laugh your way through it.

And you have to laugh your way through it because

you know that the person you're talking to is violent and unstable.

And if you say something or if you push back even a little bit, they're gonna beat you half to death.

Yep.

Yep.

Everyone has done it in their life.

I've done it multiple times.

I do it several times a day.

Yeah.

And it usually starts with, I know dad.

Now, in keeping with fascist tradition, Horbiger and his Nazi followers doubled down when

they doubled down when actual scientists said that the world ice theory, also called glacial cosmology, was really fucking stupid.

Instead of backing down, Himmler sent a German novelist named Edmund Kiss to

the Bolivian Andes to see if Edmund could prove the world ice theory.

And the only reason why he sent Kiss was because Kiss had written novels about Atlantis.

Nothing, of course, was found.

But that did not temper Himmler's admiration of novelist Edmund Kiss.

Himmler so loved Edmund's work that he actually had a special edition of one of Kiss's novels made with a leather cover, and Himmler gave this special edition to Hitler himself as a Christmas gift.

Kiss gift, please.

I must see this.

Heine,

only you get me.

I wish that you were a perk young and stricerian blood again to see if it makes you into my soon-to-be wise.

Please go look for the lost city of Atlantis.

Where?

The top of a mountain.

God is him lookon.

He gives me these fucking books every year.

And I don't want to fucking

so long.

It's for giving someone a fucking homework assignment.

It's not a good thing.

Honestly, I have to read it because if I don't read it, then he gets fucking butthurt when he asks me about it in February.

I thought he was this guy's guy, but he gives me this gay shit like it's reading fucking sick.

And I'm sick and tired of this fucking god.

Do something, take me to a strip club, do something fun with me.

I'm a man, we're very

men.

Let's experiment, have fun, isn't it?

We men have fun.

Now, as the years went by and the German people became more and more inundated with the bullshit being spewed by Himmler's Anenerbe, a large number of Germans came to believe that the old Norse myths were actually the secret history of the Aryan race.

This is where they looked at, you know, Iceland's Edda and said, oh, that's real.

That's us.

Yeah.

For example, the most fervent of Nazis thought that Thor's hammer, Mjolnir, was an actual thing that could be found and used.

But Himmler believed it harder than anyone.

And I know I'll be able to pick it up, just like when Captain America picked it up, and I can do it.

I feel like I can do it.

Himmler thought that the thunderbolt imagery in ancient Norse art and literature was evidence of an ancient advanced weapon that could be recreated and wielded by the Nazis.

A modern Mjolner that was capable of unleashing the power of the gods.

It was lightning.

Yeah.

That's what they were drawing.

Yeah.

Was the lightning itself.

Well, yeah, but it was an impressive natural formation that they couldn't understand.

We also use that as evidence that the ancient Aryans had electricity for everyone else.

Lightning does come from the sky.

It is electricity.

It's like, how can you be so evil and so annoying?

Because that's, again, it's a feature.

Now, the Anan Erba's first president, Hermann Wirth, Wirth, fell out of favor with Himmler in 1937 when Hermann dared to make the suggestion that ancient Nordic civilizations were matriarchies ruled by priestesses.

Oh, man, I could feel the ten.

Ooh, that room.

What did you say?

This was a grave affront because in Himmler's world, women were, in the words of one author, little more than compliant baby factories.

That's what women were supposed to be.

Yeah, if that.

If they could have made women just the uteruses, they would have been very happy to.

Yeah.

And when these so-called dangerous ideas made their way to Hitler, Hitler publicly denounced the president of the Annenerbe.

I was just about to do that.

Yeah.

Luckily for Hermann, though, he'd already done enough to prevent a trip to the camps, and he was instead busted down to a ceremonial position.

But as it was with Dachau, Hermann's replacement, a man named Walter Wust, was far more dangerous.

See, prior to joining the Nazi Party, Wust was a professor who had become accustomed to teaching classes to handfuls of bored students who were barely paying attention to what he was saying.

But with the Nazis, Wust found an incredibly motivated audience.

So he jumped at the opportunity to mold the minds of thousands of men in Himmler's SS, men who would then force those ideas upon the rest of Germany.

It's really been a thing with men, huh?

This idea of you just go where anybody will sing your praises no matter what it is that you do.

There's something about that, the idea of like Nazism,

the constant motif that constantly comes up is the mediocrity of the people involved, how when the Nazis came up, they created a world in which they were venerated.

In the previous world, they were considered an idiot.

Well, if you are considered mediocre, then what you do is you change the definition of mediocre.

Well, that's what the Nazis did because on the whole, they were entirely mediocre, as we can see.

Like, you can even just kind of come trying to come up with some fancy version of their past.

You could tell that they were just some, they're just a normal group of people.

They're just people.

And it's just very,

obviously it's a feature, but it just comes up a lot.

Now, by 1937, the Anunerba had 38 full-time researchers, but not all of them were what you'd call respectable.

Guys like Carl Maria Villigut were still knocking around the building.

Call me by my full name, Maria.

Call me Maria.

Carl Maria Veistor Villigat.

That's my name.

That's my name.

Carl Maria Veistor Villigat.

He also became the MC from Camera.

So, Walter Voost, as the newly minted president, got to work replacing crackpots like Karl with scholars who were actually respected in their fields.

This was a much worse thing than having kooks involved.

Yes.

But the catch that these very ambitious scholars had to deal with was that they had to be comfortable with bending or breaking the truth to fit the Nazi way of looking at the world.

Tragically, this view was becoming quite a bit more popular by the late 1930s.

See, Hitler's reign since the night night of the long knives had been rocky to say the least.

But just like another modern leader I could name, Hitler always managed to pull himself out of a popularity slump with a big gesture.

Whenever Hitler's popularity began flagging because of the chaos the Nazis caused or because the economy was in the shitter, which it constantly was, Hitler always managed to produce a big foreign policy victory, something that made the average German feel good about themselves.

But it was something he constructed.

It wasn't something he actually like did, right?

No, No, there were things he did.

There was very much things he did.

But yeah, but there was, I mean, usually all he had to do was violate something from the Versailles Treaty.

That's kind of what I mean in terms of like he just constructs it in terms of it being like, oh, look at that.

We're going to, we're going to fuck them.

We're going to make a huge army no matter what the fuck they say.

Exactly.

And regular people would be like, well, yeah, well, why wouldn't, why shouldn't we have an army?

And even people in other countries would be like, yeah, yeah, we went too far with the Treaty of Versailles.

Why shouldn't Germany have an army?

Like, everybody's got an army.

Why shouldn't Germany have one?

And he used it wrong.

because their memory is fucking short.

Well, when Hitler did something like that, you know, like, for example, like he expanded the military, even though the Versailles Treaty prohibited the Germans from having a force larger than 100,000 men.

When Hitler did something like that, even the Germans who didn't really like him would say the same shit that I've heard people say today again and again.

They say, Phil, like, I don't really like him, or like, this is things that he says, but he's getting stuff done.

So, like, just stop being so fucking hysterical.

It's like you got like Hitler derangement syndrome or something.

Well, it's the belittling of the of the thing.

I get it.

You know, we're in a very different set of circumstances than Germany was at the time.

But, you know, again, what we just said, it just, we should really be super on the ball about it getting even remotely close.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And when you just see the same, like when you have like two or three things, coincidence.

Like 20 or 30 things.

That's a comparison.

And we're pointedly pointing them out just to show you that again, it's not that the current administration is Nazis.

No.

They want to be Nazis.

And that's an entirely something different.

There's a different thing that we're dealing with.

Even just one fucking thing needs to be stopped.

Sure.

And it's, well, it's just, it's sort of the thing that we talk about with cults, like how over and over again, you know, cult leaders somehow like instinctively know how to form a cult, how to how to control people.

There's just something about it.

And that's sort of what's happening again.

They get the gears of a cult.

They understand when to slow down, speed up, slow down, speed up.

But They're just seeing, you know, people notice how humans respond to things.

And if you're of a certain mind, then things will go in a certain way.

And this is how, this is what we're looking at now.

It's like, it's like minds doing the same thing.

Yeah, they're not Nazi Germany, but they are the worst.

Yeah.

Correct.

Now, under Walter Wust leadership, the Anunnerba doubled in size in just two years.

They moved into a massive mansion in Berlin and increased the amount of staff and researchers dedicated to alternate histories and Nazi religion to just over a hundred.

As far as who paid for all this, Himmler set up a foundation using taxpayer money.

But the Anen Erbe also depended on donors, supposedly respectable corporations who wanted to stay on the Nazis' good side, just like today's corporations make donations to the current administration to curry favors.

Or fire people in order to get their president to say hello, like, you know, to acknowledge them, which we've never dealt with before.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Or, you know, do what people in the administration say to do in order to get deals, you know, pushed through.

Yeah.

But back in Nazi Germany, like these were big companies that gave money to the Anunnerba, companies that still exist today.

For example, tens of thousands of Reichsmarks were donated to Anunnerba Research by BMW.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

They made a bunch of the cars, too.

Yeah.

One of the saddest.

And a lot of, I believe, didn't BMW also make like a ton of engines for the planes or was that Mercedes-Benz?

I don't remember, but one of the two.

God knows.

It is just sad to watch Himmler just driving those just beautiful Mercedes-Benz.

He's just driving around, just like, and you're like,

ooh, it's a good whip.

Siemens, right?

Didn't they get involved with the Nazis too?

Probably.

A lot of semen in there.

Yeah.

Well, the point of all this is that German society was accepting Heinrich Himmler's Anenerbe as a respected establishment.

Therefore, its ideas and theories were beginning to inform how Germans began to act.

For example, Himmler published an article where he openly called upon the German race to preserve their heritage through violence, because that preservation was so incredibly important, you had to kill for it.

And the people of Germany, after years of consuming Anenerba propaganda in the media, they were inclined to listen.

In this article, Himmler fully acknowledged that his black uniformed SS officers were causing fear and anxiety in every corner of Germany.

But Himmler maintained that the SS was necessary.

They were, were, quote, a merciless sword of justice that would guarantee the survival of future Germanic generations.

They also were told amongst themselves, so the SS would be frightening in the front, but the SS would, the way he would lead them, is to be like, when you go out, your frame of mind is you're helping.

Yeah.

When you arrive, you help.

SS help people.

We're helping the German people.

We're helping people.

We're reminding people.

What makes you a good Aryan is by doing these things.

You know, they continually compare Jews to snakes.

Why did they name them after something a snake says?

And that's why we still got one Jew.

It's always good to have one.

No, dance.

Boom, pow, pow, pow, no, dance.

Yeah, he did want to kill him, but now

every time he makes me chuckle, I know.

He got six more days.

You keep this going, and you'll beat the talent in front of the showers.

But concerning the survival of the German people, Liebensraum was not the only Lieben Himmler was obsessed with.

There was also the infamous Leibensborn program, the so-called Fount of Life.

Fount!

Founded in 1935 and inspired by the American eugenics movement, this secret group had the goal of greatly increasing the number of children who met Himmler's exacting standards for racially pure and healthy Aryan boys and girls.

You sure said not the labia's born?

No, man.

They gotta trim them back to get the proper blonde curls.

Unfortunately, yeah.

They trim the lips because the curls actually form when the head's first out of the for what the foyer of the vagina, the mud room of the vagina.

Hey, how you doing?

Welcome to the Roast Beef Curtain Club.

That's where I'm dancing at, the Roast Beef Club.

Amongst other duties, Labensborn provided unmarried German women who became pregnant with assistance by moving them into maternity homes run by the SS.

These women were, let's say, encouraged to give up their children to racially pure Aryan parents, often SS officers, who would raise their children instead.

In this same spirit, the SS also ran orphanages that would foster Aryan children out to quote-unquote worthy families.

But these children were often not orphans.

Many times, these kids have been kidnapped from their biological families and quote-unquote re-educated before being given over to an SS couple.

And what, their parents would get sent to the camps because they hid somebody or something?

Either because they hid someone or they might have been communist, they might have been leftists, they might have been just killed.

They might have just not looked correct.

Literally, they were a shame on their own child and they just didn't want him there anymore.

This happened a lot in Poland.

It happened a ton in Poland.

A lot of blondes in Poland.

Yeah.

How do they feel about redheads?

Fine.

Yeah.

Totally.

It It depends on where you're from.

Yeah.

It depends on where you're born.

Actually, a lot of it is more about the shape of your skull than it is about the color of your hair.

It's a lot of that.

The exact.

Well, that's how you decide who's perfectly Aryan.

Yeah.

That's when you get into the real, the nuts and bolts of who was an SS officer.

Yeah.

Lebensborn, however, did not just concern itself with births.

They were also the only people in Germany who could legally perform abortions.

They performed forced abortions on those who were deemed unworthy of the Aryan race, while all other abortions in Nazi Germany were strictly illegal.

But on the more proactive side of the program, women who gave birth to the most Aryan children were given awards by the state.

And in 1936, Himmler announced that every SS man would be given a special Nazi brooch to present to their wife after they gave birth.

Wow, women be broaching.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Women love a fucking brooch.

When I want to fucking get my my dick sucked, I know I come home from the brooch store.

Brooches?

Yeah, yeah, dude.

I love hanging out with my brooch.

This attitude, however, got far more serious in October of 1939.

Same as mine.

This is, of course, just before the Nazis invaded Poland.

And this inspired Himmler to issue an order that all SS men had to conceive children before going into battle.

But the strangest part of the Lebensborn story, and I'm only saying this to avoid a flood of did-you-know emails, is that one member of the legendary pop group, ABBA, was a Lebensborn child born to a Norwegian mother who had been impregnated by one of Himmler's loyal SS men.

So we got that out of the way, right?

And honestly, it's why, you know, ABBA's pretty good.

ABBA's incredible.

I'm actually a very big ABBA fan.

I love ABBA.

Ed, guess which one's the daughter of the Nazis?

Is it the lady up top?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's that lady with the mustache.

They make them different in Stockholm.

Now, one of the things that's essential to keep in mind is that almost every single thing that the Nazis were doing here, from Leibensborn to the Annenerbe, it was all about either preparing the German people for war or making sure that there were plenty of people willing to fight and die in war.

As such, at the same time that Himmler was managing Annenerbe expeditions all over the world, he was also taking orders from Hitler to prepare his men in the SS for the inevitability of total war with the Western powers.

Because at this point, Hitler's still, there's still a lot of people in the Wehrmacht, the regular German army, who are like, no, like, no war.

We can't win.

We can't do it.

We just did this.

Yeah, we just did it.

Well, it's, yeah, there's still a bunch of treaties, and there's still like a bunch of tripwires.

Like, you invade this person, then you got both France and Britain on your ass.

We can't beat them both at the same time.

And it's just, there's a lot of guys.

But Himmler is one of the guys that's like, yes, yes, war, war.

Let's do it.

Let's do it.

Let's go.

I'll do anything.

And he knows knows it's going to take a lot of bodies.

Yeah.

By March of 1938, Hitler was pressing for the invasion and annexation of Austria.

And Himmler, never wanted to let an opportunity for a new outfit pass him by.

He got to work designing special gray SS uniforms to mark the occasion.

Hey, you know, different seasons.

You got to.

You got to try it.

You got to change it up.

Is there any reason for it?

No, he just liked it.

He just thought, like, oh my God, it's going to be so cool.

I want a new uniform.

We got to just be matching here with these black uniforms.

Everybody's seen us us in Z so many times.

Let's get some gray ones.

LRH understood this implicitly, and he understood this, which is the idea of you can make a loser feel amazing by putting him in an amazing uniform.

Yeah.

And you can make them.

And so what he did is like, these are all, again, they seem.

Everybody talks about this.

It seems very shallow and dumb, right?

It seems very like, but no, it's all a part of the plan.

When you give them a new uniform, it's a new ritual.

It's a new re-up.

It's a new commitment.

Every single time you give him a new piece of merch.

And meth.

Yes, literally.

Every single time you give him a new piece, it's a new.

All right, I kind of, I still like this.

Yeah.

Yeah, I like this.

Okay, yeah, new uniform.

Cool.

Yeah.

Okay.

New boot goofing.

But uniforms were not the only thing that Himmler had done to pave the way for Germany to invade and annex Austria, which of course was number one on Hitler's to-do list in the coming conquest of Europe.

First you take Austria, then you get Czechoslovakia, and then we'll talk about Poland.

See, during the early 1930s, Austria was ruled by a chancellor with the incredibly ridiculous name of Engelbert Dollfuss.

And I really don't know if I can come up with a better roast other than he very much looks like a guy named Engelbert Dollfuss.

Oh,

my God.

Oh, my God.

It's simple Jack.

Is I'm even.

Oh, my God.

It's fucking...

Definitely looks easy to conquer.

He looks like the character.

That's I Am Sam.

Yeah, you just give him a box of yo-yos and you're in.

Oh my god.

Mickey Rooney from the Milky Life.

He looks like a man named Ingle Bird Dolphus.

Whatever you're picturing, that's what he is.

I wish you could see this picture because this is the voice.

You like my cat.

I got a new hat.

I dropped it on some feathers.

Dad, that's some gum on it.

He literally has a feather in his cat because he only eats macaroni.

Oh, God, I need no sticky stuff on my head.

No, he has a feather on it.

It's like my hand's a bird.

God, he looks like tiny sloth.

Oh, my name's Engelberg.

You could call me by my, what my friends call me Engelberg.

No wonder.

Hitler didn't want to be Austrian.

No, Hitler wanted to be German more than anything.

That's probably why he wanted to take over Austria first because that was his hometown.

Yeah, it was where it was where he was from.

Well, Himler, well, Hitler What do you happens when Taylor Swift takes over Kansas City?

Oh, yeah.

Well, Hitler was born on the border of Austria and Germany on the Austrian side.

His father was a border agent.

So Hitler had always seen himself as racially German, even though he was Austrian, you know.

But he also, like, he never could shake the Austrian thing either.

Like, that would, you know, they always said they called him a jumped-up corporal.

Like, really, what they would say, he was a jumped-up Austrian corporal.

What's he doing here in Germany?

So, Hitler very much had the motivation to take Austria because if he took Austria, then he's not Austrian anymore.

He's German because Austria is now a part of Germany.

I find it interesting all these people like wake up and they're like, I'm not Aryan, but I feel Aryan.

Like, it's this idea of like, but I should be though, right?

Well, that's what I mean.

It's all about what feels right.

And that's what this entire episode is about.

That's the theme of this episode.

It's like, whatever feels right.

That's what the truth is.

And that's what we're going to run with no matter what happens.

Truth groovy.

Now, Engelbert Dollfuss was doing some real weird shit in Austria's leader.

He'd been inspired by Italian fascism to form a kind of Catholic corporatist movement where the Catholic Church had control over both the government and Austria's businesses.

This alliance, Dollfuss believed, between the Catholic Church and Austria, could be used to resist the Nazis, because he did actually, in fact, hate the Nazis.

But little did Dollfuss know that Heinrich Himmler was making plans to take him down without taking down Austria as a whole.

See, it's long been debated how much the Austrian people really wanted to be a part of Germany, because we've all seen the newsreels of Hitler rolling into Austria through throngs of adoring crowds.

You have women throwing flowers, people are crying.

But this was actually a Nazi tactic.

It's a sort of pufferfish move, where they would use intimidation, threats, and propaganda to give the impression that far more people supported the Nazi party than they really did, which made the people who didn't support them feel like resistance was hopeless, which it wasn't.

And it isn't.

And again, it was much easier to do that stuff without the internet.

The internet shows you, right?

Because, like, you know, how many times we, you know, I don't want to keep bringing it up, but now we have the internet that can actually show you the truth of what someone's saying.

And it's just hard because now it's about whack-a-mole, right?

It's all about constantly fighting it with misinformation.

But we at least know you can see the truth on the internet if you'd like to.

Yeah, you can see how many people showed up to the birthday parade.

Yes, if you'd like to.

But even though the annexation of Austria was ultimately accomplished without warfare, it was not done bloodlessly.

See, regardless of how many average Austrians wanted Nazi rule, Austria did have a sizable Nazi population.

Through the SS, Heinrich Himmler had been supplying weapons and dynamite to the Austrian Nazis so they could engage in a campaign of terror by blowing up railways, power stations, and government buildings.

And that's not to mention the straight-up murder of Austrians who supported Chancellor Engelbert Dollfuss.

But while Engelbert Dollfuss was feeling reasonably secure, yeah, I got a good new seat.

I got a new dock on my door, but the problem is I keep it getting a locket.

Because sometimes I lock it from the inside and then I kick it out.

Don't

climb out the window.

Don't do the nuts about that, though.

Look at this fucking man.

Look at this fucking moron.

It looks like someone's holding ice cream in front of him.

Why are you just giving that to me?

Why are you holding it?

Why are you not eating it?

You give it to me.

Give it to me.

Give it to me.

Engelbert Dollfuss didn't know about a concept that has in the years since been referred to as working towards the Führer.

And this is a very important concept with the Nazis, a very fascinating concept.

So as I said in the last episode, it really can't be stressed enough how incredibly lazy Hitler actually was.

And I'm not just talking about lazy intellectually, like he didn't want to read briefings, he'd rather just read his newspapers all day.

Hitler slept till noon almost every day.

That's the life.

Yeah.

Motherfucker slept through D-Day.

It's boring.

Because

nobody wanted to wake him up to tell him, hey, the Allies have invaded France.

We need to get our shit together.

And that was something that he should have known.

Well, it's because the office culture was toxic.

Yes.

I never knew that Hitler slept through D-Day.

He did.

He He was up in the Berghoff and his, he was on vacation at his retreat.

And, you know, D-Day, the Allies landed on the beaches of Normandy, and Hitler was here.

And they're like, well, we can't wake him up.

Don't wake him up because he's going to be.

He's going to super corrupt.

He'll be really grubby.

He's going to be really mad if you wake him up.

And then when he woke up, he went like, they told him and he went like,

it's fine.

And then walked away.

Didn't they know we were coming?

No, absolutely not.

That was that.

We won all that.

That's actually, I love the story of that.

It's for another podcast, a military history podcast, but it's actually very interesting because we got him good.

We got him good.

They had no idea.

It was a complete and total surprise.

It was one of the greatest.

There's a reason why there's millions of books and TV shows and movies made about it.

It moves the whole time.

Yeah, it really is.

But the thing is about Hitler's laziness is that it greatly informed how the Nazi Party worked.

Since Hitler was so lazy, Nazis often took matters matters into their own hands and did things that they thought Hitler would want done, working towards the Führer, as it were.

And it's very likely that the Austrian Nazis were working towards the Führer in the years prior to the invasion.

In July of 1934, a relatively small group of Austrian Nazis, like seven or eight guys, they stormed the Austin Chancellery and shot Engelbert Dollfuss to death during an attempted coup.

You guys here to take me to the park?

Hey, what you guys doing?

You guys took all eggs?

You know what I'm saying?

They stole it.

Goo!

Goo-goo-goo-goo-k-goo!

Who says there's chocolate in this tube?

Yeah, wrap your lips around it.

You just stuck on it?

Well, the coup, of course, failed.

But after Dollfuss was killed, Hitler ordered the Nazi leaders to accelerate the German war machine to full production because Hitler could feel that the time for war was approaching.

That was 1934.

By 1935, Hitler expanded expanded the size of the German army to half a million men in the aforementioned defiance of the Treaty of Versailles, which in theory should have been stopped by the other great powers of Europe.

But since they were still traumatized by World War I, Britain and France merely grumbled, and they did not act.

They also did not act when Germany moved troops to the French border, again in violation of the Treaty of Versailles.

Now, Hitler would have absolutely backed down, and he would have been humiliated if France would have moved just one unit in opposition.

The Nazi troops were actually under orders from Hitler himself to retreat if this happened.

But again, France did not act.

Like, seriously, they didn't take him seriously.

Well, no, they didn't.

It's not that they didn't take them seriously.

It's that they didn't want to do anything that could bring them even an inch closer to returning to the war.

And that was what it was all about, is that they did not want in any world to return to the trenches and what they had just gone through.

Everyone remembered it and everyone hated it.

Similarly, the governments of Europe again huffed and puffed when Hitler annexed Austria, but nothing meaningful was done to stop him.

In fact, England all but facilitated Germany's subsequent annexation of Czechoslovakia in September of 1938 with the Munich Agreement and Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain's now infamous proclamation of peace for all time.

When he got out, you know, him at the fucking airport holding up the piece of paper like he just averted everything.

Yeah, because he gave Hitler a lot.

He basically said, we won't do anything.

Yeah.

Maybe he's talking about peace as in piece of paper.

Peace have I done.

It took two hours of my time to receive this worthless piece of paper.

What all this added up to was that Hitler was starting to see that nobody was going to stop him.

He could rearm Germany.

He could amass troops on Germany's borders.

He could annex countries.

He could do anything he wanted to the German people.

And the rest of the world would do little more than give him a stern tut-tut.

This is, of course, very good news for Heinrich Himmler, who was waiting in the wings with the rest of the SS for the inevitable invasion of Poland, where Leibniz Raum would finally be put into practice.

And to ensure that Eastern Europe was well and truly cleared of all so-called undesirables, Heinrich Himmler would deploy perhaps the most evil group of men to ever walk this earth.

They called them the Einsatzgruppen, and it's with their incredibly harrowing story that we'll continue our series next week.

Man, it's crazy that they took over Austria and Czechoslovakia and no one cared.

But when they went into Poland, everyone's like, all right, this is too much.

Well,

there's military reasons.

Yeah.

Well, yeah, well.

Well, they know, but Austria and Czechoslovakia are probably like, what?

No one gives a fuck about us.

Well, I mean, with Austria, like there was, like I said, like, you know, they said, like, okay, fine, we'll do it.

Because Austria thought, like, okay, we're going to be a part of Germany.

But what Austria didn't realize was that what the real motivation for

annexing Austria was, and for annexing Czechoslovakia, resources.

Because the German economy is in the shitter.

They don't have the resources.

They need the, you know, they need food from Austria.

They need Czechoslovakia's factories.

Like, they need these things.

So they say, like, yeah, yeah, you're going to be a part of Germany.

And then once, you know, Austria is in, you know, in Germany and part of Germany for, you know, like really just within a a few months, they're like,

oh no shit.

We're not a part of this at all.

We are

subjects to these Nazis.

Like we're, we're here.

We're a fucking feedback.

We're not a part of this at all.

Fuck me.

This is a really bad idea.

Did they turn a lot of them into soldiers too?

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

And they killed a lot of them too.

Yeah.

Just know that whenever a Nazi offers you a job, it's not going to be stable.

But it paid your advice.

Unless you're a horse.

Unless they're a horse.

Yeah, you better get bigger.

Truly, because if you look at a lot of administrations, right, it was recently for no reason I was reading about Pol Pot just to laugh.

And

that was only five years.

And this was only a certain period of time.

So just know these guys burn out.

They do burn out.

Just remember that little Nazis out there.

Your job isn't safe with the Nazis because they're going to fire you too.

And then when they come for you, they're going to be just as mean to you as all the other people you were mean to as well.

The thousand-year Reich lasted 12 years.

Yep.

And we're still talking about it.

And the last few years were quite awful.

It's not like the last couple, like, it's not like 1943 to 1945 were fine.

Good.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They weren't like fun times to be in, I don't know, Dresden.

Oh, yeah.

Same thing when you go to Cambodia.

It's because for some reason these guys don't want to let go.

And to me, that's my, that's the reason why I go to BetterHelp because

it teaches me how to let go.

You got to get your pod, get, get your help there.

Now, if you know a Nazi, send them our code for LastPod50 at BetterHelp.

Patreon.com slash LastPodcast on the left.

Pay to watch us talk.

Pay to watch us flop.

And love it.

And you see

last stream on the left live every Tuesday at 6 p.m.

PSD.

That's right.

And thank you very much to Caroline Hidalgo for her help in story editing on this one and helping me to put together this massive amount of information into something that is legible.

And you can also interact with us live on the chat during the stream every Tuesday.

If you are a Patreon supporter, you can also follow us at LP on the left for TikTok and Instagram and all that stuff to see fun clips from the show and to see where we're going to be playing next year to see all of our dates.

Eddie, let them know what's happening.

Tomorrow we're in Oakland.

Fuck yeah.

So come fucking party, Oakland.

We are ready for your goddamn ass.

I love sweet, sweet Oakland.

Come on out, mother.

Yeah, man.

Bring me some goddamn food too, you piece of shit.

All right, then November 29th, we're going to be in Akron, Ohio.

December 12th and 13th, Portland, Oregon.

January 31st, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

February 28th, Austin, Texas.

March 13th, Indianapolis, Indiana.

And April 25th, Cincinnati, Ohio.

I can't wait for all you nasty natties to come out and see me.

May 29th, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

June 27th, Grand Rapids, Michigan.

July 17th, Tulsa, Oklahoma.

And July 18th, Oklahoma City.

And also, I got to say, Henry and I are doing the Crime Wave cruise in a couple weeks.

And I added shows in Florida before and after.

So on

November 2nd, I'm gonna be in Miami.

And on

November 8th, I'm gonna be in Orlando doing the Disney show again, Dead Men Tell Some Tales.

So go find tickets to that.

And that's a great show.com.

Except I want their being able to be Walt Disney.

So you won't be the same.

You won't be Disney this time.

Unless I fucking make you record a bunch.

We'll see.

We shall see.

Go on YouTube, LPN TV, some places underneath.

Ford Report, The Dogs of Space, all those shows.

Can I please

let me go sleep?

Yes, it's time to go to bed.

You go to the camp!

Hail Satan, goodbye, friend.

Hell yogi.

Man, hell,

hell Waterloo, I guess.

No, no, no.

We're not with them.

I'll give you a go in.

Hail Sophie Schul.

The Sophie Schul and the White Rose.

Sophie Schul and the White Rose.

Who are they?

Amazing punk band that are out of Bristol, Connecticut.

We might talk about them here in a couple episodes.

The resistance movement within Germany was a teenage girl beheaded by Heinrich Kemmler.

Oh, see, now I'm not going to have anything to hail next episode.

Oh, yeah.

Well, that'll probably be episode six.

Hail Kamazi, Washington.

Yeah, you're great.

Yeah.

Love Kamazi.

Hey, everybody, it's Babs.

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