Chapter 43: Adventure

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Speaker 4 Previously, on Midnight Burger, Los Angeles wasn't on fire, and Joe didn't have to record previously on in a hotel room in Oxnard.

Speaker 4 But I digress.

Speaker 6 Get ready, get set, get out.

Speaker 5 It's the Midnight Burger speed run, y'all.

Speaker 4 Yes, we were all having a hot time in the old town tonight last time as the gang crisscrossed around Cryptesia, trying to free all of the refugees.

Speaker 5 Planets to go? 997.

Speaker 5 Refugees left to save? 102.

Speaker 4 They went to this planet. Heads up?

Speaker 7 Edible arrangements?

Speaker 5 This is a fucking robbery.

Speaker 6 That planet.

Speaker 8 But your shit is the weakest.

Speaker 4 That other planet.

Speaker 5 I'm gonna fight you, I billy rogue.

Speaker 4 All kinds of crazy things went down.

Speaker 9 Shouldn't you be killing me right now?

Speaker 4 Stand aside.

Speaker 5 Why won't he kill you? I don't know.

Speaker 4 And then, right toward the end, the mystery men showed up with some sort of evil whiz-bang thing-amabobber.

Speaker 5 What the fuck is that thing? Seb?

Speaker 4 Effie, what happened to them?

Speaker 10 The Mucklewanes have gone dark.

Speaker 4 What are you doing? And the diner had a very sudden change in itinerary.

Speaker 6 We're going to their homeworld.

Speaker 4 God damn it. Our heroes now have about half a day to figure a way out of this one.
But where to start?

Speaker 7 Tita.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 10 Can you bring the Vistec into the diner?

Speaker 10 Yeah, why?

Speaker 10 I'm going to find the Muckle Wains. Oh.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 7 Why not?

Speaker 4 Grab your flashlights and your burlap sacks, everyone. We're going on a muckle hunt.

Speaker 4 Let's start the shift.

Speaker 7 The chief problem with the South American continent when it comes to the work we seek to do is this:

Speaker 7 erasure.

Speaker 7 First, there is the erasure of the jungle historical structures even if they were made of stone and not the timber that's plentiful there can be swallowed whole by the jungle inside of 10 years that's a blink of an eye to an archaeologist second the erasure of plunder The continent was raided for plunder so many times during the colonial era that important relics have been scattered across the globe now.

Speaker 7 You can find them in Arabia, you can find them in Malaysia. I found an Incan idol in the hands of a Russian fur trader one time.

Speaker 7 So, when we cross the equator looking to do the work we intend to do, we must understand that we are looking for sand castles at high tide.

Speaker 7 With every day that goes by, we lose a little more of the story of that entire continent.

Speaker 7 All right, that's all for today.

Speaker 7 Tomorrow we start on Pachakutek. It's going to be a considerable amount to memorize, so I suggest you empty your heads out before class tomorrow.
Mr. Davidson, you should have no problem with that.

Speaker 7 See you tomorrow, everyone.

Speaker 10 Looks like I found her.

Speaker 5 This is amazing, Labuza.

Speaker 12 I can't believe you pulled this off.

Speaker 10 Is Lafe's monitor working? Can you see what I'm seeing?

Speaker 12 Yeah, it's only black and white. It's kind of like watching an old movie, but I can see what you're seeing.
The black and white is kind of appropriate, actually.

Speaker 12 It looks like you're somewhere in Earth's past. Judging by the clothes, it's looking like the 1940s.

Speaker 10 This is a university?

Speaker 12 Yeah.

Speaker 14 Hey, Ava, look at this.

Speaker 12 Can you recognize where she is? Let me see.

Speaker 15 Oh, that's fucking Harvard. See the symbol on that guy's blazer?

Speaker 12 It's pretty old, though.

Speaker 15 You're right. It's probably the 40s.

Speaker 5 What was that like?

Speaker 15 The 40s?

Speaker 12 We were at war with the Nazis for most of it.

Speaker 12 Not sure if that's where you are right now.

Speaker 16 This is definitely during wartime. That class should be full of dudes, but there's only a few of them.
They've probably been called up. In the 40s, you could only defer the draft.

Speaker 16 If you were studying a science, she's talking about Pachakutek. He was an Incan Emperor.
That's not a science class.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 10 What is all this about?

Speaker 10 This isn't what I was expecting.

Speaker 15 Labuza, the Muckawains have gone through a long process of figuring out what the hell they are. It all started one day when Gloria accidentally knocked over the radio.

Speaker 15 They seem to retreat into these various fantasy worlds. I think it may have been a way of protecting themselves.
Then later on, they figured out how to do it on command.

Speaker 15 That may be what's going on right now. Protecting themselves from whatever the benefactor is trying to do to them.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 10 If they're trying to protect themselves, I shouldn't try and snap them out of it then.

Speaker 12 No, Labuza, I would play along for now. We still need to find Zebulon.

Speaker 10 Okay, looks like she's heading to her office.

Speaker 12 Try and get an appointment.

Speaker 15 See if she recognizes you.

Speaker 5 Here I go.

Speaker 5 Oh.

Speaker 10 I don't think she's going to recognize me.

Speaker 12 Is that your reflection?

Speaker 10 I I guess so.

Speaker 10 I'm human.

Speaker 15 And a very snappy dresser, looks like.

Speaker 10 This is this is weird.

Speaker 15 How does it feel?

Speaker 10 What's the point of a sweater this short?

Speaker 7 No idea.

Speaker 10 And these shoes are very painful. Is this standard?

Speaker 12 Yeah, the history of women's footwear on Earth is a painful history.

Speaker 16 Speaking of that, Labuza, I don't think Harvard was admitting women this early. They started in the 40s, but it took a while for them to issue their first PhD to a woman, so

Speaker 16 whatever we're looking at, it's gonna be evocative of the 40s, but there's gonna be some inaccuracies, looks like.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 10 I'm going to try and track down Effie.

Speaker 9 Labuza, how are you feeling?

Speaker 5 I'm feeling okay.

Speaker 10 This body isn't mine, but I don't feel too disoriented.

Speaker 9 Your biosigns are still in a nominal range. I need to get a sense of your brain function.

Speaker 9 When you're talking to me, do you have to speak out loud there as well?

Speaker 21 Yes.

Speaker 10 It looks like when I speak to you, I also have to speak out loud.

Speaker 9 Noted.

Speaker 9 I think that might be better for your brain function to have two tasks overlap.

Speaker 9 Right now, you're seeing things visually like a human would.

Speaker 5 Yes.

Speaker 9 Interesting.

Speaker 9 You have an underdeveloped ocular center.

Speaker 9 I'm surprised you can see color.

Speaker 10 That may explain why you're getting a grayscale image on your end. Yes.

Speaker 9 It's fascinating, actually.

Speaker 9 This little stunt of yours is telling me a lot about your brain that I didn't previously know.

Speaker 10 It's not a stunt, Kazi.

Speaker 5 Of course.

Speaker 5 That's not what I meant.

Speaker 10 Leif, how is the Vistec?

Speaker 22 You're all good.

Speaker 23 We've got about a dozen nodes to spare right now. Looks like whatever you're doing isn't tasking it too much.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 10 Make sure you're rotating tasks through all the nodes to keep the heat down. Got it.

Speaker 23 This thing is a beast, by the way.

Speaker 23 Really nice work.

Speaker 10 Thank you.

Speaker 7 Just because I keep firing my assistants doesn't mean you get to just walk in. Office hours are tomorrow.

Speaker 10 Yes, I know.

Speaker 5 I.

Speaker 7 Uh. Who are you? Oh,

Speaker 5 I'm.

Speaker 5 Uh-oh.

Speaker 16 Spontaneous alias time.

Speaker 23 Drumroll, please.

Speaker 7 Alexis Higgins?

Speaker 12 Nice. Bravo, Alexis.

Speaker 7 What can I help you with, Ms. Higgins?

Speaker 5 I, um. You're her new assistant.

Speaker 10 I'm your new assistant.

Speaker 7 You are? Yes. You look a bit young to be an assistant.
Shouldn't you be in school yourself?

Speaker 5 Uh, um,

Speaker 15 I you graduated early.

Speaker 10 I graduated early.

Speaker 15 Because of how smart you are.

Speaker 10 Because of how smart you are. Because of how smart I am.

Speaker 5 Oh, really?

Speaker 7 And all that intelligence of yours landed you an assistant's job.

Speaker 12 Smart women should stick together.

Speaker 10 Smart women, such as us, should stick together.

Speaker 7 Smart women, such as we should stick together. Not an English major, then.

Speaker 10 No. Physics.

Speaker 22 Physics.

Speaker 7 I see.

Speaker 7 Come in.

Speaker 7 I wasn't sent your resume.

Speaker 10 What would you like to know? How many words per minute?

Speaker 16 Go with 60.

Speaker 10 60.

Speaker 5 All right. Hey, can she hear me if I just talk to her?

Speaker 25 Yes.

Speaker 16 What does this lady do? She's an archaeologist.

Speaker 13 Bullshit, she is, Libby.

Speaker 18 Ask her why she's got a sawed-off shotgun and a holster on her chair. She does?

Speaker 5 Is that a uh

Speaker 10 firearm hanging on your chair? That's correct. Why does an archaeologist need a gun?

Speaker 7 You'll find that I go out in the field more than your average professor.

Speaker 10 And the gun is for snakes.

Speaker 10 Those are some pretty large snakes.

Speaker 7 Some of them are quite large. Yes.

Speaker 6 Excuse me, Dr.

Speaker 24 Drake.

Speaker 7 Chairman Chapman, how can you distract me today? Wait a minute.

Speaker 4 My office has just received this package addressed to you.

Speaker 5 Oh, my God. Give it here, please.

Speaker 4 That's me. The package has arrived from Ecuador.

Speaker 7 Give it here, please.

Speaker 18 What is Casper doing in there?

Speaker 24 Doctor, I recall us having a lengthy conversation about ceasing this work you're doing in Ecuador.

Speaker 14 You're wearing a bow tie.

Speaker 7 I can't stop the mail from coming in. Chairman, meet my new assistant.

Speaker 10 Her name is Alexis Higgins. Ms.

Speaker 9 Higgins.

Speaker 24 Hello, Miss Higgins. I'm Chairman David Chapman, a title I seem to have to repeat when I'm in this office.

Speaker 7 That package is still not in my hand.

Speaker 24 I haven't approved a new assistant for you yet.

Speaker 7 I have no control over the mail, nor my assistants, Mr. Chairman, though, if wishing made it so.

Speaker 24 Miss Higgins, will you excuse us, please? Dr. Drake and I must have a conversation.

Speaker 7 No, no.

Speaker 5 No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 7 Mr. Chairman, I need you to give me that package.
It's urgent.

Speaker 24 If you ceased your work in Ecuador, why would you be getting urgent packages?

Speaker 5 Oh!

Speaker 5 Nice! You!

Speaker 5 You just threw a knife at me!

Speaker 7 I threw a knife at the wall, Mr. Chairman.
If I had thrown a knife at you, you'd be running down the hallway right now, screaming, oh my god, there's a knife in me.

Speaker 5 Take your blasted package.

Speaker 4 Tenure won't protect you from everything, doctor.

Speaker 4 Ice cold.

Speaker 4 You suck, and you're wearing a bow tie.

Speaker 22 What just happened?

Speaker 7 They've been looking for a reason to get rid of me for some time now. I'm doing them a favor.
Give me the package, please.

Speaker 10 That's a very large knife.

Speaker 7 It's called a bowie knife. It's very useful.

Speaker 7 Oh my god.

Speaker 14 Labuza, get closer to that map.

Speaker 10 What is that a map of?

Speaker 17 Gloria, what does that say?

Speaker 12 Real Audiencia de Quito.

Speaker 12 Royal Audience of Quito.

Speaker 14 Okay, that's what Ecuador was called before it was called Ecuador.

Speaker 10 Is that Ecuador?

Speaker 7 Very good, Miss Higgins. There's a letter in here.
Read this to me, please.

Speaker 10 It says it's from a Jose Zatino.

Speaker 10 Dear Nell, this is either the greatest forgery I've ever seen, or this is it.

Speaker 10 I think you were right about the ruined city.

Speaker 7 Keep going.

Speaker 10 If this map has made its way to you before I have, then I probably didn't make it. You'll have to find it on your own.
I'm sorry.

Speaker 7 Good luck, Doc.

Speaker 5 God bless you, Jose.

Speaker 10 Who is Jose?

Speaker 7 He's a partner of mine, or

Speaker 7 according to that note, was a partner of mine.

Speaker 7 You think he's dead? Let's not be pessimists, Ms. Higgins.

Speaker 10 What is the map to?

Speaker 7 I often tell my students to never look for treasure maps. They're a childhood fantasy.

Speaker 26 So, what is that?

Speaker 7 It's a treasure map.

Speaker 7 What is that?

Speaker 7 That's the fire alarm. Just ignore it.
Sit back down, Miss Higgins.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 10 Did you just lock the door?

Speaker 7 Miss Higgins, why are you lying to me?

Speaker 5 What?

Speaker 7 You don't have a degree in physics.

Speaker 10 I don't?

Speaker 7 No.

Speaker 7 If you had a degree in physics, you would have been snapped up by the Department of Defense. They're employing every physicist in the country right now.

Speaker 7 A war effort tends to hoover up all the scientists.

Speaker 5 Uh-oh. Oh.
Tell her.

Speaker 12 Tell her you didn't finish school.

Speaker 10 I dropped out. Why?

Speaker 12 Why? You decided it wasn't for you.

Speaker 10 I decided to try something else out.

Speaker 7 It wasn't for me. I see.
And so you've come here.

Speaker 10 What's wrong with here?

Speaker 7 Don't answer my questions with questions, Miss Higgins.

Speaker 8 Hang on.

Speaker 16 Tell her you wanted a life of adventure.

Speaker 10 I wanted a life of adventure.

Speaker 7 A life of adventure.

Speaker 7 And you think you'll find that as my assistant?

Speaker 10 I've been here five minutes, and you've already thrown a knife at someone and been delivered a treasure map from a man who may be dead.

Speaker 11 What do you think?

Speaker 10 Not to answer your question with a question.

Speaker 7 Most people who want a life of adventure don't know what that entails.

Speaker 10 I think I may surprise you.

Speaker 7 The fire alarm that's going off? It's going to stop any second now because nothing's on fire.

Speaker 7 How did you know that? Because nothing is ever on fire. We just have drills from time to time.

Speaker 10 Safety first, I guess?

Speaker 7 The problem with that is we just had a fire drill yesterday.

Speaker 7 So why did the fire alarm go off, Ms. Higgins?

Speaker 10 Because someone wants you to vacate the building.

Speaker 5 Why?

Speaker 10 So they can steal the map. That's right.

Speaker 7 The thing about a life of adventure? Very hard to stop once you've made the decision. Last chance to go back to the secretary pool.

Speaker 10 What do we do?

Speaker 7 I need you to go hide behind that metal cabinet.

Speaker 15 Hide behind the cabinet, Labuza.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 12 She's loading the gun.

Speaker 25 What the hell is going on at this school?

Speaker 13 FYI, Labuza.

Speaker 15 This is not a standard Harvard experience.

Speaker 16 Okay, Labuza, here's the deal. Zebulon liked to talk about this magazine he loved to read.
It was called Adventure. Adventure magazine.

Speaker 16 It was filled with stories of pirates and treasure hunters and cowboys and all that stuff. I think that's where you are.
I think that's where they've put themselves.

Speaker 16 I guess you're gonna have to go on an adventure.

Speaker 5 Don't move until I tell you to.

Speaker 2 Madame Blake?

Speaker 7 Who was that? Got a good idea. Let's go.
We're going out the window. The window? You first.
Let's move, Miss Higgins.

Speaker 5 Oh, God.

Speaker 7 We're heading for the parking lot. The gunshots are going to bring more of them.

Speaker 5 More of whom?

Speaker 7 You've got on the wrong shoes for this, Miss Higgins.

Speaker 10 I apologize for not dressing for a gunfight.

Speaker 7 Try and act casually. We don't want to attract attention.

Speaker 10 You have a gun in your hand.

Speaker 7 Running people attract attention. Walking people are invisible.

Speaker 7 Do you know how to drive?

Speaker 10 No! Of course.

Speaker 7 Get in the passenger seat.

Speaker 5 Shells, gun. Reload it.
How?

Speaker 18 Libby, look for a button by the trigger guard. There you go.

Speaker 13 Press it.

Speaker 7 Now we'll crack it open.

Speaker 12 Good.

Speaker 18 Got the shells.

Speaker 7 They're going to be hot. Ow.

Speaker 5 Ow. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

Speaker 13 Pop some new shells in and close it up.

Speaker 5 Good. You're ready to go.
Here.

Speaker 7 Thank you.

Speaker 7 In the mid-16th century, the Spanish were at war with the Incan Empire. As you can imagine, it wasn't going well for the Incans.

Speaker 7 The last man to make a stand against the Spanish was a man named Ruminyawi. He burned Quito to the ground so the Spanish couldn't claim it.

Speaker 7 And as the legend goes, he hid the gold of the Incan Empire somewhere in the jungle. When the Spanish finally caught him, they tortured him until death.
He never gave up the locations of the gold.

Speaker 10 That's what the map leads to?

Speaker 7 Well, they're chasing us, aren't they? Who's chasing us? Hang on. Here they come up behind us.
Roll down my window.

Speaker 7 Now, dug down.

Speaker 6 Oh, God. All garage, wannabe!

Speaker 7 That should be the last of them, but reload anyway. Where are we going? I hope your passport's in order, Ms.
Higgins. We're headed for the jungle.

Speaker 10 You were right about needing different shoes.

Speaker 9 Ha!

Speaker 7 At least.

Speaker 9 Everyone aboard the ship, there's plenty of room for all of you. Find a room and get comfortable.
Once you're all aboard, the ship will orbit until we return.

Speaker 27 You're not coming with us?

Speaker 9 I'm afraid we can't, Fiona.

Speaker 9 We promised we would take these people to a safe place where they could start over, and we've brought them to a place more dangerous than the one they were in before.

Speaker 9 In the end,

Speaker 9 Malu's death is our fault. The least we can do is make sure her family is safe.

Speaker 27 What can I do?

Speaker 9 There are some injured and disabled among the refugees. Make sure they get into a comfortable bed and then find a place for yourself.

Speaker 27 Okay.

Speaker 9 I have to get back to Labuza. What if? What if we don't come back?

Speaker 9 The ship has several automations that Tita has programmed into it.

Speaker 9 You won't be able to do anything complicated, but if you don't hear from us in, let's say, three days, you'll need to get as far away from this place as you can.

Speaker 9 I suggest you find a place on the outer rim of this galaxy, or if you are feeling adventurous, try and make it to a nearby system.

Speaker 9 The nearest galaxy to this one is Amalgamus Pax. I believe Earthlings call it the Leo triplet.

Speaker 28 Then what?

Speaker 9 Then I'm afraid it's up to you.

Speaker 9 I apologize, Fiona.

Speaker 9 You would have been safer had no one taken you from your planet.

Speaker 27 Believe it or not, I think I prefer this.

Speaker 4 I would as well.

Speaker 7 Anybody out there?

Speaker 16 Yeah, hey, I'm here. We're going to start taking turns sitting with you.
The diner is about to take off, and there's a lot going on.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 17 You're on a plane now?

Speaker 10 I appear to be.

Speaker 10 How much time has passed for you?

Speaker 16 A few minutes.

Speaker 10 For me, too.

Speaker 10 We seem to have skipped forward in time.

Speaker 16 Right, just like a story would.

Speaker 10 This is a terrifying way to travel.

Speaker 5 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 16 I hate planes.

Speaker 26 It feels like the whole thing's about to come apart.

Speaker 16 If it's any condolence, that wouldn't be a good ending to the story. So that's not going to happen.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 17 Now, the engine failing, and then the two of you having to put on parachutes, and then jump out, and then make your way through the jungle on foot, that could totally happen.

Speaker 16 That's a great story. Great.

Speaker 10 Adventure Magazine.

Speaker 16 Adventure Magazine.

Speaker 14 I know it all feels pretty ridiculous, but that's not how we'd like to do things around here.

Speaker 10 It makes sense. You earthlings love your stories.

Speaker 16 How were you able to do this again?

Speaker 10 I could hear a peculiar frequency in the radio. It was dense, like it was multilayered.

Speaker 10 I thought if I could repurpose the Vistec to process the signal and then reconnect with it, I could get access access to the Mucklewains.

Speaker 10 I wasn't expecting this.

Speaker 10 I hope it works.

Speaker 16 If it helps, there's a lot more to worry about right now, so don't put pressure on yourself.

Speaker 10 Is everyone freaking out?

Speaker 14 Uh, maybe a little.

Speaker 16 The refugees are all aboard your ship now.

Speaker 10 I can't believe I dragged all of you into this, too.

Speaker 17 Would you stop it with that?

Speaker 16 You didn't make the diner show up, it just shows up. I know.

Speaker 10 Give me something to do.

Speaker 22 What do you mean?

Speaker 10 I feel like I'm just a passenger. Whatever the Mucklewains are going through, how can I help them?

Speaker 16 Keep a lookout for messages.

Speaker 10 What kind of messages?

Speaker 16 One time when they were in a state like this, they seemed to be sending us coded messages.

Speaker 10 Have you noticed anything so far?

Speaker 16 Well, Effie appears to be carrying around a bowie knife.

Speaker 5 And

Speaker 16 another name for a bowie knife is an Arkansas toothpick.

Speaker 7 I see.

Speaker 16 So that could mean jack shit, or it could mean that Effie is saying to us, Hey there, I'm right here. There's no way to know yet.

Speaker 10 I'll keep a lookout.

Speaker 7 Bad news, Ms. Higgins.
The engine is failing on the plane, and we won't be able to make it to Bogota. Put on that parachute.
We're gonna have to ditch this plane.

Speaker 10 God damn it, Casper.

Speaker 5 Sorry.

Speaker 5 Hey,

Speaker 5 it's me.

Speaker 5 Uh this is

Speaker 6 this is uh

Speaker 6 stupid message to send

Speaker 6 I am currently in Cryptesia, believe it or not. Uh and even though this message travels at the speed of light, it will take I'm guessing 2.4 million years to reach the nearest comms node.

Speaker 6 So what am I doing?

Speaker 6 I'm sending this because it may be the last time I send a message to someone.

Speaker 6 I'm in a pretty sticky wicket right now.

Speaker 6 I've been wondering lately when my luck was going to run out, and I may have come right up to the edge of it.

Speaker 6 I needed to send a message to somebody.

Speaker 6 So I'm sending it to you, Berts.

Speaker 6 If somehow you do hear it, it may be kind of a burden to hear.

Speaker 5 Sorry about that.

Speaker 5 A couple of things.

Speaker 6 You should stop investigating Bilius. If you don't, the Teds are going to make you their prisoner.
I know you think you can get out of it, but how about you just don't, okay? Just

Speaker 6 don't.

Speaker 6 There may be one less leaf out there to pull you out of a jam, so

Speaker 6 could you do me a favor and just skip it?

Speaker 5 Oh, hey, also.

Speaker 6 I went about 150 years out from your current situation, and you were the chairman of the new coalition.

Speaker 6 You beat the Teds in a war.

Speaker 6 Also, you made a home on Sigius for the last Earthlings left in the galaxy.

Speaker 6 I mean, that was in another universe, but still,

Speaker 6 it was you.

Speaker 6 And it was really cool.

Speaker 6 I never did anything that cool.

Speaker 6 I have a sneaking suspicion that you and Verge have stayed in touch.

Speaker 6 I'm sure my name's never come up.

Speaker 6 If you see them,

Speaker 6 can you tell them I'm sorry?

Speaker 4 Also, if you still got that Julia Roberts costume, could you check in on my mom sometime?

Speaker 6 I'd appreciate it.

Speaker 6 I don't know how I'm getting out of this one, Berts.

Speaker 6 Having someone to send this message to has made that a little easier.

Speaker 6 Goodbye.

Speaker 29 What's that about?

Speaker 6 David, um,

Speaker 6 just

Speaker 6 unfinished business.

Speaker 6 Never seems to be finished.

Speaker 29 You think it's good for morale for you to be sending out your last will and testament to whoever that was?

Speaker 4 Come here.

Speaker 6 Here, take these.

Speaker 4 What is this?

Speaker 6 Slug fabricator for your gun. Also, this is a plasma exciter.
Use this about once a day, depending on how often you use the gun.

Speaker 6 Also, if you're using it a lot, please ask yourself what you're doing with your life.

Speaker 29 I don't need...

Speaker 6 any of this. Get on the ship, David.

Speaker 29 No. David.
You're going to throw me over your shoulder and make me me get on the ship?

Speaker 4 David,

Speaker 6 I don't know what's wrong with Casper right now. He should be telling you all of this.

Speaker 6 But, since he's not, I guess it's my job. Get on the ship.
No. You don't have anything to gain by being here.

Speaker 5 There's nothing to prove.

Speaker 6 It's not going to be a fun adventure.

Speaker 29 Okay, why am I still waiting around for one of y'all to treat me like I'm not 12?

Speaker 6 I remember this part, okay?

Speaker 6 You treat everything like a game because, hey, you're not on Earth anymore. It's a dream come true.
Nothing can go wrong now. All the bad shit happens on Earth.

Speaker 6 It's just fun and games out here, right?

Speaker 29 That's not how I feel.

Speaker 6 Look, there was this period of time after Pirate Lafe and before Diner Lafe, there was this...

Speaker 6 Scared out of his fucking mind, Laf.

Speaker 6 I was on the run constantly.

Speaker 6 Always looking over my shoulder, riding the fringes. I had a hideout on an ice giant in the worst fucking system in the triad.

Speaker 6 Every weird noise was someone coming to get me. I was literally an insane person.

Speaker 4 It was a lot of dread and a lot of doom.

Speaker 6 I haven't felt that way in a really long time. I feel that way right now.

Speaker 29 Get on the ship, David. No.

Speaker 29 Fuck.

Speaker 29 Laif, I was a teenage runaway. You think I don't know these feelings you're talking about?

Speaker 6 I think you're just a wee bit higher, David. Leif,

Speaker 29 do you want to know why you felt all that dread and doom back then?

Speaker 6 Because you are alone.

Speaker 29 If my choices are safe and alone or in danger with other people, I think I know which one I'm going to pick.

Speaker 29 I'm not getting on the ship.

Speaker 6 You remind me of him.

Speaker 29 Gross. No, I don't.

Speaker 6 No, No, you do.

Speaker 6 I know it doesn't make sense, but

Speaker 6 I guarantee you that when you ran away,

Speaker 6 he wasn't worried about serial killers or drugs or anything.

Speaker 6 He was just worried about you being alone.

Speaker 6 And here you are

Speaker 6 saying this to me.

Speaker 6 You remind me of him.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 5 Cooler, though. Absolutely.
Thank you. Leaf.

Speaker 21 Two-minute science meeting.

Speaker 30 Come down here.

Speaker 29 Can I come?

Speaker 11 You are pretty stupid, David, but sure.

Speaker 5 Okay, go.

Speaker 21 What is up with these guys' weapons? What do you mean? They randomize someone's place in space, time, and dimension.

Speaker 15 Yeah.

Speaker 21 Which is essentially killing them.

Speaker 6 There's a non-zero chance of someone surviving, but yeah. Why? Why what?

Speaker 21 Why not just use a laser gun or whatever?

Speaker 5 I don't know.

Speaker 4 They're pretty effective weapons.

Speaker 5 Actually, Actually,

Speaker 5 are they? Okay. Uh

Speaker 5 well

Speaker 6 they take a long time to charge. Right.

Speaker 4 And they leave the user vulnerable while they do.

Speaker 5 Right.

Speaker 21 Why all the space-time dimension business? You don't actually need it.

Speaker 11 Tita.

Speaker 29 What? Two-minute science meeting.

Speaker 21 Two-minute what? Come here.

Speaker 7 What is it?

Speaker 21 What is a really big gun?

Speaker 11 What do you mean?

Speaker 21 Something really big and lunky.

Speaker 11 Um, a Kimber derp is pretty big.

Speaker 21 What's that like?

Speaker 11 It's for shooting down aircraft. You take one shot and you have to change out the whole battery.

Speaker 6 Oh, I made me one.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 21 And then what's something small?

Speaker 5 Something small.

Speaker 11 The snarky bark double zero. Yep, short range.
You can hide it in your pocket.

Speaker 21 If you are trying to shoot people, would you use a Kimber derp?

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 21 Why?

Speaker 6 Because that's not what it's built for.

Speaker 21 See what I'm saying?

Speaker 4 Their weapons weren't meant to be used against us.

Speaker 9 I don't think so.

Speaker 11 Well, then, what the fuck are they meant for?

Speaker 28 I don't know.

Speaker 15 Guys, we don't have time to take a break right now.

Speaker 32 We're having a two-minute science meeting.

Speaker 11 Anything useful?

Speaker 6 Yeah, but I don't know what to make of it just yet.

Speaker 31 Okay, on that note, I have a thing.

Speaker 6 Watch this.

Speaker 31 I'm going to count to 20. Why? One, two,

Speaker 4 three,

Speaker 4 four.

Speaker 11 What's happening right now?

Speaker 5 No idea.

Speaker 29 Are we supposed to count?

Speaker 11 Back to the weapon thing. If their weapons weren't meant for us, what's the ideal target for a weapon that randomizes your position in space-time?

Speaker 5 I don't know.

Speaker 31 1920.

Speaker 21 Hey, right? There's no time dilation in the deep freeze.

Speaker 11 There was time dilation in the deep freeze?

Speaker 31 Used to be. Time used to move faster in there.
It doesn't anymore.

Speaker 7 Huh.

Speaker 21 I didn't even notice.

Speaker 31 Neither did I. We were too busy.

Speaker 6 What's going on? Now that you mentioned that, has anyone noticed that the diner sounds different when it travels?

Speaker 5 No. Ooh, I have.

Speaker 6 It's subtle, but I'm hearing it more and more.

Speaker 29 There's like a

Speaker 6 noise and a whispery thing going on.

Speaker 29 I think I hear music sometimes. Huh.

Speaker 31 Okay, two-minute science meeting over. I need you to put a pin in all of this.
Ava, David, you're with me. Okay.
Casper.

Speaker 23 What's up?

Speaker 31 I need you to come with me. Ava, I need you to stay with Labuza.

Speaker 8 Okay.

Speaker 9 Hi, Labuza.

Speaker 21 Where are you right now?

Speaker 10 Walking through the jungle.

Speaker 5 Ooh.

Speaker 21 Sounds like Bug City. Watch out for centipedes.

Speaker 10 What's a centipede?

Speaker 21 The thing that's probably in your boot right now. Great.

Speaker 10 Speaking of my location,

Speaker 10 where am I right now?

Speaker 21 What do you mean?

Speaker 10 This connection with the Vistec has completely taken over my senses. I can't feel where my actual body is.

Speaker 21 Ah, you are lying on the table of my booth.

Speaker 9 That's a weird place to put me.

Speaker 21 No, no, that's where all the good mojo is. You are lying on my table, and Mr.
Monolith is right here next to you. Say hello, Vistag.

Speaker 10 So I'm supposed to be looking for clues.

Speaker 7 Yes.

Speaker 10 Casper wants me to tell you that Effie's knife that she's carrying is called an Arkansas toothpick.

Speaker 22 Is that a clue?

Speaker 21 Oh, that's amateur hour, if you ask me. We need numbers.
Get her to recite some numbers for you. We need to give her a chance to give you a numeric code.

Speaker 10 Okay, can I get out of the jungle first?

Speaker 31 Okay, I need to talk to both of you. Why? The diner's going to leave in a few minutes.
We don't have a lot of time. A lot of time for what? You and your dad were about to get into an argument.

Speaker 31 We were? Yes, because the safest place for you to be right now is on board that ship. But you're not going to get on it, are you?

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 31 And this is what you were going to argue about.

Speaker 6 Gloria, I wasn't.

Speaker 29 Well, we can skip it because I'm staying with the diner.

Speaker 31 And your dad would, of course, say, you're heading into certain doom.

Speaker 6 Don't be ridiculous.

Speaker 31 Get on that ship.

Speaker 4 I'm not trying to do that.

Speaker 5 I would, of course, say no again.

Speaker 31 And the two of you would go round and round like that for however long. Well, that's true.

Speaker 5 Gloria, listen.

Speaker 31 The thing is, David, he's not arguing with you at all right now.

Speaker 6 Look at him.

Speaker 31 This is the quietest I've ever seen him. It's been a long few weeks, David, and it's been treacherous.

Speaker 22 And he's hardly freaked out at you at all.

Speaker 31 I'm kind of impressed, actually. So this is me cutting to the chase.
David, you're not getting on the ship. Fine.

Speaker 31 Can you please acknowledge how hard Casper is working to be literally the exact opposite of himself right now?

Speaker 21 Okay, we're leaving in a few minutes.

Speaker 29 Thanks.

Speaker 4 I honestly don't know if it's any safer on the ship.

Speaker 4 Welcome to Midnight Burger.

Speaker 7 Here you are, Ms. Higgins.
What is that? It's whiskey.

Speaker 10 Could I just get a glass of water?

Speaker 7 I'd advise against drinking water here. Then why did we even stop here? To make the next leg of our journey, we're going to need a riverboat.

Speaker 7 And due to the fact that we are currently being chased, I can't go through the usual channels. I've heard there's a man here with a boat, so we've stopped here.

Speaker 10 And now that you've taken me deep into the jungle, are you going to tell me who's trying to kill us?

Speaker 7 The Society of Bethanies.

Speaker 5 The what?

Speaker 7 The Society of Elizabeth Inise Duchamp. Elizabeth, shortened to Beth, Beth Anise, Bethany's.
do you follow me?

Speaker 10 What do they want?

Speaker 7 The short answer is gold.

Speaker 7 The long answer is, a series of easily manipulatable autocrats in strategic nations around the world.

Speaker 7 Elizabeth Aynaise Duchamp is one of the wealthiest women in Europe and she is the leader of a secret society that attempts to manipulate global events.

Speaker 10 If they're so rich, why do they need the gold?

Speaker 7 Money can be traced. Gold cannot.
Their current project is a particular madman who happens to have an army marching across Europe right now. Let's not mention his name.

Speaker 7 An army runs on money. They want to make sure he doesn't run out of it.

Speaker 10 Seems like a rather complicated plan just to get their hands on some gold.

Speaker 7 If the legends are true, it's a sizable amount of gold, Ms. Higgins.
Enough to transform a nation.

Speaker 15 Come on, Effie, give me something.

Speaker 15 Make her give you something quantifiable. Maybe the location of the gold?

Speaker 10 Maybe we should have a look at the map and commit the location to memory. In case we lose the map or it's taken from us, that's not bad.

Speaker 7 Get the map out. I'll get us another round.

Speaker 10 I didn't drink my first one. Nice.

Speaker 15 Okay, Labuza, hang tight. We need to have a pretty important meeting in the real world.
I'll be right back.

Speaker 31 Okay, everyone, we're on our way.

Speaker 31 I have no idea what we're headed toward right now.

Speaker 31 These mystery men have been trying to kill us for weeks now. And right when they could have, they didn't.

Speaker 31 And now we're headed to their home world.

Speaker 31 I don't know what that means. Let's take some comfort in the fact that we got almost all of the refugees to safety.

Speaker 31 And with a little luck, maybe they'll manage to get out of this goddamn system and find the home they were looking for.

Speaker 5 We have 12 hours to prepare, but

Speaker 31 but prepare for what

Speaker 31 we have no idea what awaits us the next time we touch down. If we could get some sense of the benefactor's plan, that would be something, but right now we're flying blind.

Speaker 31 I hate it, but there's not much we can do about it.

Speaker 7 Is anyone there?

Speaker 31 Yeah, Labuza, is everything okay?

Speaker 10 I think you may want to watch the screen. Something interesting is about to happen.

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Speaker 2 Rules and restrictions apply.

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Speaker 7 The location we're looking for is right here. Now, as you can see, this map has no reference points except for this city right here.
This is an ancient Incan city.

Speaker 7 The first explorers from Spain discovered this city. They said it was a thriving city full of commerce and trade.
It was the hub of the entire region.

Speaker 7 The problem with this discovery is that when the Spanish finally managed to get back here 100 years later, the city was gone.

Speaker 10 It disappeared?

Speaker 7 It did not. Everyone assumed that the early explorers had been mistaken somehow and that the city didn't really exist.
The problem with explorers is that they aren't archaeologists.

Speaker 7 These were explorers on a new continent. What did these explorers bring with them?

Speaker 5 Uh

Speaker 26 supplies?

Speaker 10 Diseases?

Speaker 5 That's right.

Speaker 7 The explorers didn't come to conquer yet. That would come later.
But even though they didn't come to conquer, they brought with them the most effective weapon in their arsenal.

Speaker 7 Diseases that the Incans had no defense against. The explorers show up with diseases, then they leave.
Then a hundred years goes by. What happens in that 100 years, Ms.
Higgins?

Speaker 10 They all die.

Speaker 5 That's correct.

Speaker 7 Over a hundred years, the population is decimated by disease, and the jungle takes back the city. It effectively vanishes.

Speaker 10 But you know where the city is.

Speaker 7 In fact, I do.

Speaker 15 Ask her for the coordinates.

Speaker 5 What are the coordinates?

Speaker 10 It's here.

Speaker 7 2.35711 south, 1.31719 west.

Speaker 7 The locals call it Suplan Okulto.

Speaker 5 Wait,

Speaker 15 Labuza, get her to repeat that.

Speaker 10 Did you say that again?

Speaker 5 Suplan Okulto. What is it?

Speaker 12 That's not the name of a place.

Speaker 12 That means his hidden plan.

Speaker 14 His hidden plan.

Speaker 16 What are they saying to us?

Speaker 14 Oh, shit.

Speaker 13 Who do we know that has a plan?

Speaker 14 Oh, shit.

Speaker 25 The benefactor. Oh, shit.
Leif, what?

Speaker 14 It's a hackback.

Speaker 14 What is that?

Speaker 19 When you try to hack someone's system, you also make yourself vulnerable because your system is connected to theirs now, right?

Speaker 19 The Mystery Men showed up with some kind of device that shut down the Muckle Wayne's. But now, look, Effie's on a mission to a place in the jungle called his hidden plan.

Speaker 19 This whole adventure isn't them trying to protect themselves.

Speaker 25 They're trying to hack into his systems.

Speaker 11 They know how to do that?

Speaker 14 The Muckawains don't know how to do anything.

Speaker 19 Everything they do is expressed symbolically.

Speaker 19 So while we're seeing some treasure hunting adventure, what's really happening is a hack into the benefactor's systems.

Speaker 19 Labooza, I'm almost positive that if you can get to that spot in the jungle, we can somehow know the benefactor's plan for us. That would be amazing.

Speaker 16 Well, this little adventure just became a lot more important, didn't it?

Speaker 12 Labuza, you've got to get to that spot in the jungle.

Speaker 7 the hell are you doing at my bar?

Speaker 31 I thought I smelled books.

Speaker 10 Oh my god.

Speaker 19 Gloria, is that you?

Speaker 5 No way.

Speaker 7 Boom boom, long time no see.

Speaker 31 I thought you retired from the treasure hunting business.

Speaker 7 Do you have a wooden leg? Miss Higgins, this is Boom Boom, an old colleague of mine. We were

Speaker 7 in the foreign Service together.

Speaker 31 That's one way of putting in.

Speaker 11 That's how I got this. Wooden leg confirms.

Speaker 31 Suriname, 1922.

Speaker 31 Never get into a fight with the man who keeps alligators.

Speaker 7 Your leg was eaten.

Speaker 6 That's right.

Speaker 31 I don't like to hurt animals, but god damn it if I didn't make that little fucker into a pair of boots with the matching valise.

Speaker 7 We did eat well that night.

Speaker 10 I'm sorry about your leg.

Speaker 32 Boom boom.

Speaker 31 Don't you worry about a thing. My leg may be made of wood, but the rest of my body is cast iron.
See there?

Speaker 5 Go ahead.

Speaker 6 Touch it.

Speaker 31 That's my bicep. See what I mean?

Speaker 33 Like I've got a coconut up my sleeve.

Speaker 7 Won an arm wrestling competition at Guadalajara.

Speaker 5 Mel.

Speaker 31 It's good to see you again, partner. Though I reckon if I'm seeing you again, you don't have time to chat.

Speaker 7 BB,

Speaker 7 I hear there's a riverboat captain who likes to make himself known around your place.

Speaker 5 I need to go with someone I haven't worked with before, so I'm just a bit wary.

Speaker 31 I've got one for sure, but I don't know that he's the type you want to be associated with.

Speaker 7 Well, we're pressed for time, so I'm afraid I can't be particular.

Speaker 31 If you say so, Booksha.

Speaker 7 Where can I find him?

Speaker 31 I'll fetch him for you.

Speaker 31 Stay right here.

Speaker 6 Looping! Give me that bucket of water!

Speaker 13 Okay, everybody, start calling me Boom Boom.

Speaker 14 Strangely, the wooden leg works for you. Right?

Speaker 19 Anybody wondering where Zebulon is?

Speaker 5 Suggie!

Speaker 5 Hey!

Speaker 5 Morning has broken!

Speaker 31 Rise and shine, Suggie!

Speaker 12 There he is!

Speaker 16 Oh my god.

Speaker 5 Boom Boom, I'd like to take this time to remind you that there are many ways to wake a man up in the morning.

Speaker 5 Maybe, but there's only one way to wake him up in the afternoon which it is how am i supposed to know that my watch has been broken since an unfortunate incident in paraguay you got a customer saggy i'm making you coffee much obliged and if you wouldn't mind just a bit of rum in it and also hold the coffee you've got to be kidding me morning ladies

Speaker 7 afternoon At as well.

Speaker 5 How can I be of assistance? You can't. You're in need of a river boat.

Speaker 7 You're in need of a shower.

Speaker 5 On the contrary, I bathed mere moments ago in a delightful spray of mop water.

Speaker 5 Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Aloysius J.
McGillicaddy. Most folks call me soggy.

Speaker 7 Are you called soggy because your boat is always sinking?

Speaker 5 Again, on the contrary, I am called soggy because I am quite often woken up by a bucket of water. But now that you mention it, my boat has sank many times.
Do either of you have a light?

Speaker 10 Your cigarette is soaking wet.

Speaker 5 Ah, so it is.

Speaker 29 Let's wait for that to dry, shall we?

Speaker 5 Boom, boom.

Speaker 10 Are you serious?

Speaker 5 Hey,

Speaker 31 I've got what I've got.

Speaker 7 Is there a problem? Mr. McGillicuddy, you have, in the span of about 20 seconds, informed me that you are a drunk whose boat is always sinking.
Why in the world would I entrust you with my safety?

Speaker 5 Well,

Speaker 5 life

Speaker 5 is interesting here on these rivers. I found that people tend to engage me in

Speaker 5 various business arrangements due to the fact that I have the only boat for hire for about 300 miles in either direction.

Speaker 5 So, people are free to shop around, but there's only one thing for sale on the shelf, isn't there?

Speaker 5 That's economics, is what that is, young lady.

Speaker 7 I'd rather swim.

Speaker 5 The piranha would prefer that as well.

Speaker 7 We'll decline your services at this time, Mr. McGillichetty.

Speaker 5 Now, ladies, please understand, I realize my appearance may be a bit shoddy, but it's not as though we've sat down at the Ritz together, have we?

Speaker 5 I'm sure you wish me to be a more sober man, but as Yates once said, the worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk, they are sober.

Speaker 7 You've read Yates?

Speaker 5 Did a stint in a Bolivian prison. I was allowed one book.

Speaker 7 And you picked Yates?

Speaker 5 I was not allowed to choose which book.

Speaker 7 Thank you for your time, Mr. McGillicuddy.

Speaker 5 Very well.

Speaker 5 As it happens, I have an empty diary for today, so when you change your mind, I'll be right over there.

Speaker 7 Good to know.

Speaker 12 Okay, Labuza, this is going to be a challenge, but you've got to convince Effie to hire him, okay?

Speaker 10 It sounds like we may have to hire him. What else are we going to do?

Speaker 7 I haven't figured that out yet, but I do know that getting on that man's boat is a death sentence.

Speaker 10 More of a death sentence than being caught by the

Speaker 7 who were they again? The Society of bethanese i'd rather take my chances with them than with whatever that man's excuse for a boat is

Speaker 7 who is this now oh come on fucking nazis seriously

Speaker 6 so sorry to disturb gentlemen please continue with your debauchery oh my god what what no

Speaker 6 are you fucking kidding me my My name is Commandant Blunt of the Third Reich.

Speaker 6 I wish to know the whereabouts of one

Speaker 6 Dr. Eleanor Drake,

Speaker 6 known to her friends as Nell.

Speaker 6 Or the more familiar Buckshot.

Speaker 5 Oh my God. I can't fucking believe this.

Speaker 5 We're Nazi game.

Speaker 6 Frau Drake, I presume.

Speaker 7 Can I help you?

Speaker 16 This is the most Hogan's heroes-ass shit I've ever seen in my life.

Speaker 6 May I sit?

Speaker 7 I'd rather you not.

Speaker 6 It is a pleasure to meet you, Frau Doctor.

Speaker 6 I have heard many tales of your adventures around the globe.

Speaker 7 People tend to exaggerate.

Speaker 6 As a doctor, und woman of logic,

Speaker 6 I would hope that on this day,

Speaker 6 logic would prevail.

Speaker 7 Hard to hear about logic from a man wearing black leather in the jungle.

Speaker 6 I'm sure you understand that the third right has many associates throughout the globe just as you may

Speaker 6 and when those associates find themselves in a particular predicament we wish to assist them in their endeavors

Speaker 6 you

Speaker 6 are in possession of a map a map which is the rightful property of our associate.

Speaker 6 We only ask that you return this map, and our business here can be complete.

Speaker 7 For a nation in such a hurry to conquer the world, you'd think you'd be better at cutting to the chase.

Speaker 6 And perhaps you should not waste my time.

Speaker 7 Miss Higgins.

Speaker 12 Oh my god, Labuza. I realize that life dressed like a Nazi is the funniest thing that has ever happened in history, but you really can't laugh right now?

Speaker 6 Forgive me. I do not understand what is funny.

Speaker 7 I wouldn't expect a German to understand what's funny.

Speaker 5 Oh,

Speaker 5 I see.

Speaker 6 Yes, you Americans always walking around saying, ha ha, look at me. I am so humorous.

Speaker 6 We shall see who is laughing when our tanks parade sugar.

Speaker 16 Betsy Laif is mad. Shut up.

Speaker 5 It sounds as though someone did not have his muesli this morning.

Speaker 6 Cease your laughter.

Speaker 6 You realize I am only having this conversation because I am attempting to make civil.

Speaker 7 Really? Well, I'm only having this conversation so that Boom Boom has time to load her.50 caliber.

Speaker 5 Pardon?

Speaker 33 Let's make some sauerkraut

Speaker 7 Out the back Miss Higgins.

Speaker 5 I've got a crate full of bullets and a hankering for big Netsy.

Speaker 5 Oh my

Speaker 7 We need to get away from the river. We'll have to go into the jungle.
And what do we do?

Speaker 5 Lovely day for a sojourn on the river, ladies. Get on the boat.

Speaker 7 I think we need to get on the boat. It's safer back in the bar.

Speaker 5 Dr.

Speaker 7 Drake, I need to get you to that hidden city, and I need it to be with him. Please,

Speaker 5 damn it all.

Speaker 7 Let's go!

Speaker 5 All aboard.

Speaker 11 You were supposed to be on the ship.

Speaker 27 I know.

Speaker 27 I've been hiding by the dumpster.

Speaker 27 You've fought in a bunch of wars.

Speaker 11 Some of them were wars.

Speaker 7 I mean, some of them were just disagreements.

Speaker 27 How do you know when to fight?

Speaker 11 What do you mean?

Speaker 27 Well, it's called a fight-or-flight response. How do you know when it's fight or flight?

Speaker 11 I don't really do the flight part.

Speaker 27 Didn't the three of you escape some other place, though? You were in some other galaxy and then you came here?

Speaker 11 You're confusing running away with a tactical retreat.

Speaker 9 I couldn't get on the ship.

Speaker 27 I had to know who did this to me.

Speaker 15 I had to know why.

Speaker 7 That desire may get you killed.

Speaker 28 I know.

Speaker 27 Anyway, that's what I'm doing here.

Speaker 27 Not that you asked.

Speaker 5 You're right.

Speaker 11 I didn't ask, but I get it.

Speaker 11 I'd rather live ten seconds looking my fear right in the eye than spend a lifetime running from it.

Speaker 5 It's brave.

Speaker 27 Right now, it just feels stupid.

Speaker 11 I mean, stupid too, but

Speaker 11 brave and stupid are often a matching set.

Speaker 9 Tita, we need to speak.

Speaker 5 Sure.

Speaker 11 We have a stowaway.

Speaker 7 We do?

Speaker 9 Fiona.

Speaker 18 Hi.

Speaker 9 What's this about, Fiona?

Speaker 11 She has decided to face her fears.

Speaker 9 I see.

Speaker 9 You should have consulted with me about this, Fiona.

Speaker 27 I think sometimes you have to do something ill-advised. What good would advice do?

Speaker 9 Very well. You're in it now.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 27 Do I get a tattoo or something?

Speaker 9 You don't.

Speaker 9 Tita, I need to speak with you. Yeah.
I need you to think back over the past few weeks.

Speaker 11 So many fond memories.

Speaker 9 In all of your skirmishes with our assailants, do you recall a time in which one of them was pointing their weapon at you, trying to kill you specifically?

Speaker 11 They took a lot of shots at us.

Speaker 9 At you, specifically.

Speaker 11 Honestly, I wasn't paying that much attention to what they wanted.

Speaker 9 Why? We haven't had time to speak. During one of the away missions, one of them declined to kill me.
As if they were being ordered not to.

Speaker 11 Ordered by who?

Speaker 9 I'm unsure.

Speaker 11 Could be they have different plans for us than they do the Earthlings?

Speaker 9 What would be the tactical advantage of not killing us? We're more dangerous than the earthlings.

Speaker 11 Remember when Ava first busted us out of prison? Remember what those two guards said? What they called us?

Speaker 9 The descendants.

Speaker 11 I don't like this at all.

Speaker 9 We need to refrain from making any assumptions until we have more evidence.

Speaker 11 In a few hours, we're going to get a shit ton of evidence.

Speaker 9 The more information we can have before we land on their home world, the better.

Speaker 9 Labuza may be onto something downstairs. Do you have anything else? I was talking to Leaf and Ava earlier.

Speaker 11 They had a theory, and I think I have to agree.

Speaker 9 What is it?

Speaker 11 Their weapons suck.

Speaker 9 Their weapons are incredibly powerful.

Speaker 11 Not in one-to-one combat. If it's an overwhelming force, sure, they're powerful, but they're slow to fire and they're vulnerable when they are firing.

Speaker 11 The kind of technology these guys have, they could make something way more effective than what they're using.

Speaker 9 And how do you account for that?

Speaker 11 Only theory I have.

Speaker 11 Their weapons are built for a different kind of target.

Speaker 9 What kind of target?

Speaker 11 I've been thinking about that all day.

Speaker 11 The only reason I would make a weapon like that-a weapon that doesn't kill you but instead flings you across the multiverse-I'd only use that on something I didn't know how to kill.

Speaker 9 They're scared of something.

Speaker 11 Something that isn't us.

Speaker 9 Well, what the hell is it? I don't know.

Speaker 11 I'd love to not find out.

Speaker 27 Well,

Speaker 9 that's not the most helpful information, but any information will do.

Speaker 26 Hazy?

Speaker 9 Yes, Fiona.

Speaker 27 You said you needed information.

Speaker 27 Is there any way that some information might be

Speaker 8 inside me?

Speaker 9 I was already able to get some information from you, Fiona.

Speaker 27 I was just thinking, you said I was born in some sort of birthing chamber and then had memories implanted in me. Even though I was young, do you think maybe there are some memories in there?

Speaker 8 Somewhere?

Speaker 9 The human brain can't create long-term memories until roughly its third year.

Speaker 9 Which means for memories to be implanted in you,

Speaker 9 you would need a brain capable of retaining long-term memories. so.

Speaker 9 I suppose it's possible that you may have very faint memories of that process taking place.

Speaker 5 Well...

Speaker 27 Wanna come and get them?

Speaker 9 I don't know if that's wise, Fiona.

Speaker 27 You already put nanobites in my bloodstream. Couldn't you just use those?

Speaker 9 I would need to add more, and it would be very invasive.

Speaker 27 That's okay.

Speaker 9 It's not okay, Fiona. It would be very dangerous.

Speaker 10 Kazi,

Speaker 27 if I'm being honest, I'd like to rip every single thing out of my body right now and completely start over anyway. So

Speaker 8 go nuts.

Speaker 5 All right.

Speaker 9 Let's begin.

Speaker 5 Very good.

Speaker 5 Very good.

Speaker 5 Keep your hands on the wheel, or at least within a grabbing distance of the wheel, and you'll be doing just fine.

Speaker 10 But I don't know where I'm going.

Speaker 5 Don't worry. The key to navigating a river is the following:

Speaker 5 if you see a tree ahead,

Speaker 5 turn.

Speaker 7 Which way?

Speaker 5 Toward the way without the trees.

Speaker 5 Alright.

Speaker 5 Call out if you hit anything.

Speaker 5 My cigarettes have thoroughly dried out. Can I offer you one?

Speaker 7 Please.

Speaker 5 Rum?

Speaker 7 As well. Thank you.

Speaker 5 I'm realizing now

Speaker 5 that I've heard of you.

Speaker 7 You sobered up then?

Speaker 5 Not at all, no.

Speaker 7 Buckshot

Speaker 5 Drake.

Speaker 7 I spent five years telling people not to call me that, and eventually I had to surrender.

Speaker 5 That sort of thing tends to happen when you carry a shotgun around.

Speaker 7 Well, I'm not going to carry a ukulele around.

Speaker 5 Yes.

Speaker 5 Honolulu Drake does not command the same type of attention.

Speaker 7 It does not.

Speaker 5 So

Speaker 5 what's all the hubbub then, Doctor?

Speaker 5 I've known you only a few hours and you've already ruined my favorite bar.

Speaker 7 I'm on an expedition.

Speaker 5 Oh, really?

Speaker 5 This isn't how you vacation?

Speaker 7 I'm an archaeologist.

Speaker 4 I see.

Speaker 5 Well, let me put a few things together here.

Speaker 5 An archaeologist being chased by Nazis and the like,

Speaker 5 heading downriver to an undisclosed location.

Speaker 5 One can only assume there's a sizable pot of gold at the end of that rainbow.

Speaker 5 Do you have any idea how many folks like you have come down here looking for that lost Incan treasure?

Speaker 5 Well,

Speaker 7 I hear gold is popular.

Speaker 5 More so than staying alive, it would seem.

Speaker 7 Mr. McGillicuddy, are you concerned for my safety?

Speaker 5 We've been through so much together. I'd hate to lose you now.

Speaker 5 It's a rather dangerous road to travel, is all I'm saying.

Speaker 7 Good for me I'm traveling by boat, Ben.

Speaker 5 I've carried my share of treasure hunters up and down this river. May I ask you the question that always seems to flummox them?

Speaker 5 Oh,

Speaker 7 please do.

Speaker 5 Then what?

Speaker 28 Then what?

Speaker 5 Once they're sauced enough, they tell me their plan and how long it's taken them to put it together. They have it on good authority that the gold is here.

Speaker 5 They have a map leading to the gold there, etc.

Speaker 5 And after I hear them tell their little tale, that's when I lay it on them.

Speaker 5 Then what?

Speaker 5 It's at that moment they realize that they've been so focused on finding the treasure of a lifetime, they have no idea what they're going to do once they have it.

Speaker 5 They think for a long while and then finally come up

Speaker 5 something completely embarrassing, like

Speaker 5 buy a house.

Speaker 5 Why does money always fall into the hands of those incapable of doing anything interesting with it?

Speaker 7 And what would you do?

Speaker 5 Money corrupts the soul, Doctor. That's why I've seen fit to never have any.

Speaker 5 Though, if you do hit the jackpot, I wouldn't mind a new boat.

Speaker 7 I'll consider it.

Speaker 5 But in truth,

Speaker 5 what will you do with it all?

Speaker 7 Nothing special.

Speaker 7 Perhaps I'll have you take me up and down these rivers, and I'll go village by village, handing it out one piece at a time.

Speaker 5 Oh.

Speaker 5 Going for folk hero status, then.

Speaker 5 Pico Spill, John Henry, and now Buckshot Drake.

Speaker 7 Why not?

Speaker 5 Well, as folk heroes go,

Speaker 5 you're not so bad.

Speaker 5 Hey, Labooza.

Speaker 26 Hi, David.

Speaker 5 Quick question.

Speaker 5 Is, um,

Speaker 6 is there a vibe?

Speaker 15 I'm sorry.

Speaker 12 Thank you for saying something.

Speaker 16 They're flirting with each other.

Speaker 5 They are? They are? Oh, yes.

Speaker 10 I'm with David.

Speaker 7 What's the status of your hull? Are we going to be a breakfast buffet for the Caymans by the morning?

Speaker 5 Our current waterline seems to be holding. I think we'll have a safe night's sleep.

Speaker 17 Go in, Zebulon.

Speaker 12 This feels like a private moment, but I can't look away.

Speaker 5 If you like,

Speaker 5 you can come down and inspect the hull yourself.

Speaker 5 Might help you sleep soundly tonight to see it for yourself.

Speaker 7 Pour me another drink, Mr. McGillicotti.

Speaker 5 Yes, ma'am.

Speaker 13 And cue the saxophone.

Speaker 7 Lead the way.

Speaker 7 Bring the bottle.

Speaker 4 I always do.

Speaker 5 Oh my god.

Speaker 14 So much game.

Speaker 12 This, of course, raises the question: are all their personas fucking?

Speaker 15 Oh, sure.

Speaker 16 Frank and Dr.

Speaker 14 Barbara? Absolutely. 100%.

Speaker 5 I thought we all knew that.

Speaker 9 I'll need you to keep your eyes closed through this entire process, Fiona.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 9 I'm going to try and access early visual memory so the less stimulus to your optic centers, the better.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 9 I'm going to inject more nanites now.

Speaker 27 Okay, can I just say, I know I was acting very brave earlier, but I did think I would be unconscious for this.

Speaker 5 Ow! Ow, wow, wow. Okay.

Speaker 9 I apologize. During certain procedures on the brain, the subject needs to stay awake so that I can monitor monitor their speech.

Speaker 11 You'll be fine, Fiona. She had to do the same thing to me a couple of times.
I don't know what it is about shrapnel, it just loves to get lodged in my brain. That didn't kill you?

Speaker 11 A Laharian only dies when they are sick of living.

Speaker 9 Especially this one.

Speaker 27 Why, especially Tita? I'm sorry, should I not be talking right now?

Speaker 9 No, the talking helps. I need to look out for slurred speech and jumbled words.
Okay.

Speaker 27 What's so special about Tita?

Speaker 9 Tita, Labuza, and myself are all the children of a very mysterious man who conquered a large part of the Andromeda galaxy a very long time ago.

Speaker 9 He had lots and lots of children whom he left with several genetic advantages. We're the last three.

Speaker 27 What happened to the others?

Speaker 11 Killed mostly. Some disappeared, but we think they're dead too.

Speaker 9 We became an inconvenient presence for the powers that be.

Speaker 9 But I was used to being an inconvenient presence, so I knew how to survive. Labuza survived because she could always anticipate their moves.
And Tita lived for obvious reasons.

Speaker 11 My charm.

Speaker 11 She's talking about my charm.

Speaker 27 What happened to your father?

Speaker 9 Toward the end, he could see that he couldn't win against a changing galaxy.

Speaker 11 So he climbed into a ship and he flew it into a star.

Speaker 27 Wow.

Speaker 27 Was he a

Speaker 8 good dad?

Speaker 9 None of us knew him. He had always moved on by the time we were grown.

Speaker 7 But how many cats were in the newspaper?

Speaker 9 Say that again, Fiona.

Speaker 5 But

Speaker 7 how many cats were in the newspaper?

Speaker 9 Okay.

Speaker 9 I think we've reached your speech center, Fiona. Can you say your name for me?

Speaker 27 Paul Giamatti.

Speaker 9 Excellent. We can begin.

Speaker 5 There's

Speaker 8 only like 12 fries in a happy meal.

Speaker 9 Fiona, for the next few minutes, we're not going to be able to understand you, but you'll understand us.

Speaker 5 All right?

Speaker 8 Like a

Speaker 27 parliamentary system?

Speaker 21 This is funny.

Speaker 27 You should do this at parties.

Speaker 9 I'm going to attempt to mine early visual memories. The nanites are connected to me, so I should be able to see the memories myself.

Speaker 27 I don't travel a lot, but when when I do, I think about Shakira.

Speaker 9 Tita, try to keep her talking while I'm doing this.

Speaker 5 No problem.

Speaker 11 Hey, Fiona, what's your favorite color?

Speaker 27 11.

Speaker 11 And what's your favorite number?

Speaker 7 Twinkies.

Speaker 8 Ah, and what's your favorite snack?

Speaker 7 The

Speaker 27 Bronze Age.

Speaker 11 What's six plus five?

Speaker 27 Phili la Buffon de Fue a la farmacia.

Speaker 5 Oh.

Speaker 27 The pogo stick was invented in 1919 by German inventor Max Pollig and German engineer Ernst Goettl, who combined their names pogo for the device.

Speaker 27 However, modern spring-based pogo sticks were developed and popularized in America by George Hansberg in the 1920s.

Speaker 27 According to legend, Hansberg was inspired by seeing children in Burma using stilts with rubber springs.

Speaker 11 Yeah, uh, that is a good one.

Speaker 5 I've got it.

Speaker 9 There you are, Fiona.

Speaker 9 Just a child in a lab.

Speaker 9 It looks like they had to keep you conscious the same way I am now.

Speaker 9 You look no older than

Speaker 9 three years of age. She remembers that far back? Luckily for us, it was a traumatic memory.

Speaker 9 The human brain may suppress traumatic memories, but it never

Speaker 9 ever lets go of them.

Speaker 9 She's surrounded by technicians. They're human as well.

Speaker 9 I don't recognize the technology they're using.

Speaker 5 They're...

Speaker 9 there's some sort of symbol on the wall. If the technicians would just move.

Speaker 9 All right, I see it.

Speaker 10 What is it?

Speaker 11 Kazi?

Speaker 5 I see.

Speaker 9 Fiona, time is of the essence. I'm going to have to pull you out of this very quickly.

Speaker 27 Late night with Conan O'Brien. Kazi?

Speaker 11 What did you see?

Speaker 9 I need to speak with Labusa.

Speaker 7 Morning, Miss Higgins.

Speaker 6 Morning.

Speaker 21 Sleep well?

Speaker 10 Yes. Um.

Speaker 10 Did you sleep in his quarters last night?

Speaker 7 I did.

Speaker 10 I thought you said he disgusted you.

Speaker 7 Oh, he does.

Speaker 22 But

Speaker 7 he was there. I was there.
We were on the river. Seemed only natural.
Don't be a prude, Ms. Higgins.
It's only the disgusting ones who have learned a thing or two.

Speaker 12 Vindication at last.

Speaker 5 I'm no expert, Doctor, but that does not look like an ancient city to me.

Speaker 10 It just looks like the jungle.

Speaker 7 It's there, trust me. The jungle can claim a corpse in two weeks, a vehicle in a month.
This jungle has had hundreds of years to make this city disappear.

Speaker 7 As the legend goes, there's a hidden vault beneath the city. Shouldn't be far from here.

Speaker 5 I've shut off the motor, haven't I?

Speaker 7 Yes.

Speaker 5 Then what is that sound?

Speaker 5 Good morning, gentlemen. I realize there's precious few places to dock on this river, but that's no need for gunplay.
Who are they?

Speaker 7 The same people who have been chasing us this whole time. The Society of Bethanies.

Speaker 21 Bonjor vu, Madame Drake.

Speaker 17 Oh, hell yeah.

Speaker 12 Jesus Christ, Ava.

Speaker 14 She's got a writing crop, of course.

Speaker 7 Elizabeth Anaise Duchamp, lovely to finally meet you.

Speaker 25 Oh, dear baby Jesus, thank you so much for making me the evil French lady.

Speaker 21 What a time it has been to chase you across the globe, Madame Drake. But the time has come to surrender.

Speaker 7 Do we run? I count one, two, three, four, five long guns, Ms. Higgins.
We wouldn't make it ten yards.

Speaker 21 Please allow me to express me remersement.

Speaker 21 This petite aventure has been in truth l'emousion d'un vie.

Speaker 17 Lady, what the hell are you saying?

Speaker 25 Who cares? It sounds fabulous.

Speaker 7 You know, Miss Duchamp, you've made a big mistake backing the Third Reich. When you get in bed with fascists, you're just a frog who thinks they're a scorpion.

Speaker 14 What? Uh,

Speaker 22 what is this?

Speaker 21 Can you say

Speaker 21 scorpion?

Speaker 30 Le Grenouit?

Speaker 12 No map there.

Speaker 21 Madame,

Speaker 21 you will give the map to my men, or

Speaker 21 we will be given La Tash Malarus of killing you and leaving your body in the river. La jou etomenet, mademoiselle.
The time has come to surrender to me.

Speaker 7 I'm not giving you the map.

Speaker 30 Then you shall die.

Speaker 5 Let's hold the phone here, ladies.

Speaker 5 Things are running awful hot here on the river.

Speaker 5 Now, I realize you are both very passionate about finding this little pile of treasure off in the jungle, but I found that the true treasure is a life well-lived and a long one at that.

Speaker 5 So, allow me to be the adult in the room. The map is right here in the bag.
Allow me to fetch it for you. Mr.

Speaker 7 McGillicuddy, if you reach into that paragraph.

Speaker 5 Do we we have a deal, Doc?

Speaker 29 What? I mentioned before.

Speaker 5 Do you find your gold? Do you buy me a boat?

Speaker 5 Certainly. Good.
I'll be needing one.

Speaker 25 Oh, shit. That's not a map.

Speaker 5 Here we have it.

Speaker 21 Mon Dieu.

Speaker 5 One treasure map.

Speaker 21 Oh, monsieur, that is a steak of TNT.

Speaker 5 Is it?

Speaker 5 My goodness. You know, I'm not good until I've had my morning rum.
What an embarrassing mistake. I'll just set this down by these gas cans.
No, monsieur! Glorioski.

Speaker 7 Into the drink, ladies. Jump, Miss Higgins.
Oh, God.

Speaker 8 Oh, sacrete bleu.

Speaker 5 I'm thinking when you buy me a new boat, I'll go a step up.

Speaker 5 Really treat myself.

Speaker 5 Maybe a cruiser this time. Up my prices, make a killing.

Speaker 5 Then again,

Speaker 5 who needs the extra hullabaloo that comes along with success?

Speaker 10 How much deeper do we need to go?

Speaker 7 We found it.

Speaker 10 What is all this?

Speaker 7 I'm afraid it's a puzzle.

Speaker 10 There must be a hundred symbols on this wall.

Speaker 5 What's it all mean?

Speaker 7 Nothing.

Speaker 5 Nothing?

Speaker 5 Seems a lot of trouble for nothing.

Speaker 7 Together they mean nothing. Every symbol appears to be a panel that we depress.
We need to choose the right symbol.

Speaker 5 And if we don't?

Speaker 7 I'm not completely sure, but it

Speaker 7 will be something along the lines of poison darts, trapdoors, maybe a den of poisonous snakes dropping down on our heads.

Speaker 5 Well, that's hardly a friendly doorbell. I'm getting the sense that the owner of this vault doesn't want us here at all.

Speaker 7 That's a shrewd assessment, Soggy.

Speaker 5 Hear that?

Speaker 5 She called me Soggy.

Speaker 5 I believe we'll be married in spring.

Speaker 10 I'm so happy for

Speaker 7 None of these symbols make any sense. I've never seen any of them before.

Speaker 5 Damn it.

Speaker 9 Labuza, can you hear me?

Speaker 10 Yes, what is it?

Speaker 9 What are you looking at right now?

Speaker 10 It's a wall of symbols. We need to press the right one to get access to the vault.

Speaker 9 I see.

Speaker 9 Labuza, I need you to look for the mark of the visitor.

Speaker 5 Why?

Speaker 9 Please just do it, Labuza.

Speaker 10 All right.

Speaker 14 Kazi, what's the mark of the visitor?

Speaker 5 Wait.

Speaker 5 It's...

Speaker 10 it's here.

Speaker 3 Can you see it?

Speaker 9 I see it.

Speaker 9 Kazi, what's going on? Press it, Labuza.

Speaker 4 Are you sure?

Speaker 9 Sadly, I am.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 16 Kazi, what the hell is the mark of the visitor?

Speaker 9 It's the sigil of our father.

Speaker 7 She's done

Speaker 7 Nice work, Miss Higgins.

Speaker 7 Here it comes.

Speaker 5 Hello.

Speaker 7 Hello there, darling. Effie.

Speaker 5 Labooza, you look exhausted. Yes.

Speaker 10 I'm not sure how much longer I can stay here.

Speaker 7 It's not a place for the timid, dear.

Speaker 10 Effie, what happened?

Speaker 7 We got what we came for.

Speaker 10 You know his plan?

Speaker 7 I'm afraid we do, yes.

Speaker 10 It's not good news.

Speaker 7 It is not, dear.

Speaker 5 After all that.

Speaker 7 Yes, it's not what we hoped for, but we're now armed with knowledge, which is a better weapon than none at all.

Speaker 10 What happens now?

Speaker 7 Now, you are going to ski-daddle back to the diner and move yourselves in that contraption of yours. There's much to discuss, but before all that, Zebulon and I are going to have a moment.

Speaker 7 You tell Gloria and the rest that we'll be right

Speaker 10 Are we going to be okay?

Speaker 7 I believe we will.

Speaker 7 So let's start with that.

Speaker 5 All right.

Speaker 10 You have a lovely home.

Speaker 5 It'll do.

Speaker 7 It was very brave of you to come along on this whole fantasy of ours, dear. You're quite intrepid for one so young.

Speaker 10 I'm very old, Effie.

Speaker 7 Only on the outside, dear. Now you go on.

Speaker 5 Here we are, dear.

Speaker 7 Thank you, husband.

Speaker 7 Quite a storm we're headed into, dear.

Speaker 5 Indeed.

Speaker 7 Then

Speaker 7 what is that smile about?

Speaker 7 Oh,

Speaker 5 you know how it is.

Speaker 5 In the storm, in the calm,

Speaker 5 with you there

Speaker 5 it's always an adventure.

Speaker 7 'Tis that.

Speaker 7 Casting yourself as a drunken river rat.

Speaker 5 I'd never Not to point fingers, dear, but there you were in the bowels of my ship. Out of wedlock?

Speaker 7 I heard no complaints from you.

Speaker 5 No, those were not complaints you heard.

Speaker 5 Bit of music, please.

Speaker 5 Last night I lay a leaping of the

Speaker 5 ball.

Speaker 5 Well

Speaker 4 all of that sucks.

Speaker 7 It is not a bouquet of flowers, Life, that much is certain.

Speaker 21 At least we know something now.

Speaker 4 What does that get us? Seriously, before the Muckle Wayne's adventure, we were heading into a know-win situation. Now we're heading into a no-win situation.

Speaker 27 There's really nothing we can do?

Speaker 5 Hope springs eternal, Fiona.

Speaker 4 Oh, goddammit, Zebulon.

Speaker 10 I still can't believe this is happening.

Speaker 11 Believe it.

Speaker 9 It's happening. There are still several unknowns.
Personally, I'm looking forward to some clarity.

Speaker 4 Well, if Kazi's looking forward to it, then I fucking quit.

Speaker 21 You can't quit now, Shmoopy. Nobody else will hire you.

Speaker 4 I'm sure there's a dimension-hopping unemployment office out there somewhere.

Speaker 6 Maybe we all should have ditched. Sent an empty diner to the heart of darkness.

Speaker 10 Mallow's family is there.

Speaker 7 We can't leave them.

Speaker 4 God damn, this guy absolutely fucked us.

Speaker 6 It's like he knows the diner better than we do. I feel like I'm back in the triad, completely trapped.
It's ridiculous. This place should feel like the freest place in the universe.
And look at us.

Speaker 6 We're a flying jail right now.

Speaker 5 Food's better, though.

Speaker 29 No matching outfits.

Speaker 5 And escape attempts would most assuredly fail.

Speaker 4 I do truly hate sometimes our ability to make fun jokes in the face of total motherfucking doom.

Speaker 9 Everybody, shut up for a second.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 31 We have a few hours left.

Speaker 31 I am going to have several questions, and then I'm going to have a plan.

Speaker 31 When you hear this plan,

Speaker 31 you are going to say,

Speaker 31 I'm out of my mind,

Speaker 31 and then we're going to do it anyway.

Speaker 31 Enchiladas are done.

Speaker 31 Everybody ready to get started?

Speaker 5 Looking for you.

Speaker 7 We open at six.

Speaker 4 Midnight Burger is brought to you in part by our Monte Cristo level and above supporters. Wilson, Billy, Burtbert, Bethany, 2nd Bethany, 3rd Bethany, Society of Bethany's, Lady Bethany, aka Mrs.

Speaker 4 Turkey Spit, Mr. Squizzle, Sizizzle, Wizzle-Fizzle, the horrendous secret co-conspirator behind the long-ongoing Bethany War.

Speaker 4 The non-binary Bethanies take the apple from the Marsh Hag because why would they poison us twice? Alexandre Laroque has brought La Guillotine to assist the Bethanies in their survival war.

Speaker 4 Vive la Révolution. Dances with the Bethanies, or Bethany's with burritos, if you prefer.
Corvina, the only real Bethany.

Speaker 4 Local marsh hag ominously wishes a happy new year to Bethany's and non-Bethany's of all gender varieties. Gathering of Bethany's drink from the water hole.
Introducing Recy Pontiff as the 23rd Dr.

Speaker 4 Bethany. This episode boldly beckons a bigger batch of brilliant by names brewing a bubbling Bethany stew to broaden the best finale rue.
Banjo Bethany has lost much in the war.

Speaker 4 They only wish for peace and to see their family again. Oh, Bethany, where art thou? Anomalous Bethany.
My hot wife Bethany calls this show Space Burger all the time.

Speaker 4 Green Mountain Hermit wants that NB Bethany stew recipe. Three geese in a trench coat all named Bethany definitely not causing mischief in the ongoing Bethany War.

Speaker 4 Big Bag bussing out the Bethany Bentiga, a non-binary thylacine named Bethany. Byro the motherfucking dragon with his horde of Bethany's.

Speaker 4 Red Nell hiding in a crowd of Bethanies to avoid capture by Wilbur Winklewright, wristwatch wrangler of West Worcestershire.

Speaker 4 JS, Daniel Enright, Enderglitch78, Artist Dragonborn, a pleasant pheasant plucker.

Speaker 4 Shaloma, Bill Zangana Lester, Joaquin Jimenez, Muffins, Space Wives, Chad Hatter, Captain Jack Harkness, Once Peter the Robot, Elise Myers, Oreo, Oreo, no wait, pineapple, actually, never mind, Oreo, Jargon HD, tell your cat I said,

Speaker 4 Latasha Lynn Michels Johnson, Cuddy Kraken, Life's a Load Studio, Sue Miller, The Game, Disco Techno House, Alex Light, Sahil, Varyan, Somenity, Tim, LL Cool Mint Jams, The Other Original Caitlin, Kendaddy, Andrea, Honorifica Bilitutinus Tatibus, Hazel, Humbly Marks, mainly with Wifty, Werifestria, Chris Hightree, Millie Was Taken, Dead to Me86, Hannes, Lucas Isn't a Loser, He's a Wiener, Ben Camp, Louise Bavnani, Shan Man Man Man, Anne Rum Burton, My 84 Chevy, Kinran, Wabajack, Daniel, Chance Rygaard, Just Books and Coffee, Dr.

Speaker 4 Bootiologist, The Glutes Doctor, Tobias Ewing, Thank you for pressing too. Your Anglophone Emotional Support Canadian request will be processed in the order in which it was received.

Speaker 4 Queen Surly Jess, R.I.P. Lance McLean, You Would Have Have Loved Midnight Burger.
Adam Tokelove, Dr.

Speaker 4 Bitchcraft, Sassy Cat the Space Vixen, Claire Rock, Jeka, Greybeard, Colin Loves Roxy, the Size 2 Fish You've Been Looking For.

Speaker 4 Iokai, Natasha Without Boris, Stephanie Bridges, Lafayette Lasagna Lovers 1, The Main Immortal, Chiel Neal, Sin City Scuba Steve, Polly Wog, Jinx the Judgmental but Well-Meaning Cat, Michaela White, Elena Pickle, Wilbur Winklebright, Wristwatch Wrangler of West Worcestershire, on the trail of the dastardly Red Nell, Professor Thaddeus Snookums, Retorted, Von Grimm, Nico DeGallo goes great on Midnight Burgers, a drum major and a trapeze artist walk into Connie's bar, Cody Monster, Keith Collins, Riley Jane dances on her tippy toes, South Wayne, Sierra Smith, Lambo Swanson of the Swanson Otters, Hazley J, Rest in Peace, Mikey, Fossildiver84, Casey Judson, Solomon Price, Megan Hazen, Daylon Foles, Jade Blade, Chucklin Charlie's Chicken Shack, Doc Sweet Ph.D., Cody Chisholm, Ruth McCormick, Lord Than and and Lady Sarah, Any Crafts, Anywhere, Mr.

Speaker 4 Grin, Glenn Petrofsky, True Trans Traveler, Leaf's Orb, The One That Got Away.

Speaker 4 This moment of silence, so Joe can catch his breath, is brought to you by Rick Tyler, Elizabeth Hammond, Funch Brunklund, Steam Vision, Conductor of the Interdimensional Time-Spanning Hype Train, Dave Harold, Wise Cube, Dirty Diaper, Fussbutt, and the Piggy Runt, Bromine, Pronounced Bro, Mine, Cat Cat, Mother of Pearl, El Chingon, Seal Face, Rigor Mortise, Elmo, Megan's Things, Things Meghan Makes, Shiny Fields, Magically Maggie, Trebex, Reject, Prophet of the Mucklewains God, Matthew with two T's, The First T is Silent, Finley and I will join you for dinner someday.

Speaker 4 Darth Ox, Aaron Arnold, Bailey Burr, Amanda Tracy, Mama Mander says, Happy First Birthday, B-Raz, Valen Real, the Tooth Fairy, They Paints, Undead Akira, Broom Goddess, Portagos Pex, Unselling Wizard, Ryan, Thomas's Ten Tenebris, Tan Staffel Tippers, Treading Treacherously Tantamount to telling totalitarian trope termination tales.

Speaker 4 Ladies, for your pleasure, Chuck, Naked, The Lovely Lara Lovely, Jeremy the Ruler, Alex Church, Ahsoa, Goat G, Jacob Mitchell, Zeke in the Box, Stevie Crowhill, How to Get Jack from John, Joshua Soder, Gabba Ghoul, Scrubs Andy, Scratchy Kitty, Just Some Guy from Adelaide named Ryan, Remy, The Panda Crew, Melody Prime, Beardo the Wizard, Whiskered, Beth Ann Sans Beth, Randy Spears, Marissa the Ghost, Local snowplows in your area are dying to meet you, Rutherford B.

Speaker 4 Chesterfield and his dapper companion Winchester, Wolfgang the Incredulous, Andrea Rose, Cheshire Corgi, Ole Kelsey, No Shoes, Share Bear17890, Zuldia, Little Man from County Down, Sasha, Beth and Allen Van Gillis, Langston North, Sly Fox, Brought to You by Communism, Timothy Aotis, Chance Wants You to Know He Cares, Wolfstark, Adrian Vance, Elliott, Hobbes DeCoe, Alexis Walker, Roy of Yin, Mooby the Golden Calf, Kirion, Giovanni Salinas, Rocky G, Perry the Pirate, Aaron Elizabeth, Kay Narconyx, Daydream, Angela Sanchez, Bubba 485, aka Schemelbach the Christmas Whale, Kaiju Somolier, Space Rooster Randy Roosts in Ava's booth, Stella Corvus, My Love of Verge is Undying, Candyman Fight, Sketch Wolf, Jessica Engeli, Kevin Dottri, Adam Wolf, Martin Deers, Entropy Eigenbasis, Robert Savat, Drink Spiller, Matt B., Richard Ryan Moschel, Theodore and his son Henzo, D.

Speaker 4 Flower, Kella Tiarina, Fall of the Berlin Wallaby, Parmesan Goose, Jen Rhodes, Kevin Lutra, Lauren Mayer, Jake the Cook, Alan Berglund, Dylan Winslow, V.

Speaker 4 Greenlee, Courtney Morris, Ryan Abbey, I hope something good happens to you today. Yes, you.

Speaker 4 Wasabi Lube Moonshine, Wasabi Lube's Mom, Turtle Boy, Arwen the Freer, Fridge Pickle, Jacqueline Snyder, Ron Hayden, Dan Gentry, Vincent Yu, Steven Duro, WhisperDan, Mad Maddox, John Peters, you know, the farmer, Barkley on the Holodeck, Dapper Dad, ADHD Brulee, SCP-049, O Magis, Michael Laurie, Raven the Dreamer, TK, Turtle King, Dominique Perry, Space-Based Lasers, Caption B, and Lady G with their swabs, The Clockwork Vixen, Verge Fangirl, and Designated Midnight Server, Ozneth the Author, Mr.

Speaker 4 Steamwave, My Friend the Rhino says be nice.

Speaker 4 Jupiter Defense Squad, Timmy Tim Tim, aka 2 Inches Proud, Elizabeth T, Gus, Kyler Wren, Coco Yumi, Huggamuffin, Bigfoot of Doom, D.L., Annie Atkins, Crandyman, Garot, Nick Gomez, Coldblood, The Say of Ra, aka Bleepo Abernathy, Our Cats Said to Tell You, Meow, Brian, Ed, and Kev, Del Casa Bro, Lord Denham, Jay Schmoe, Benjamin Ortiz, Mr.

Speaker 4 Frog President, Pop Rock, Quicksand, Call Me My Love Again, Abanasso, Mr.

Speaker 4 Rage, Ada, Spooky Spader Storytime, Andy, I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit, upon a slitted sheet I sit, Lazarus, the McJimmies from your local dimension, Xavier Killingsworth, Reformed Colonel Reb, Ghoster Alagamo, Aaron Starr, Claude DeClaus, Chis Alfredge, the Bullheaded Professor, Chris Janda, Ed Boy, Ryan Finelli, Jonathan Kay,

Speaker 4 Another Monster, Petabyte Avatar, Tugwin the Mighty, Project Octopus, Ken, David Royal, Captain Hambone, King Felix Blaze of the Third Street Saints, Scotty Oates, Iced Heart on Fire, Dan's Grounded Again, Damn, baby, that ass tastes like straight soup, Spico, Nic Tac-Toe 2.0, Simply Tony, Gabriel Castellon, Jamie the Goblin of Chaos, Whom, What,

Speaker 4 Why,

Speaker 5 where?

Speaker 4 A Dubious Raptor, God is Love, Love is King, Cash Green, Sir Party Animal, Huloy Jackal, Cat with a K, Miss Shan Fizzle, Stomp Be Hot Box in the Phoenix with June and Steve, Lucifer Hezekiah, Lachi Wawa Brava, Cece Carousel, Korth the Destroyer, Honest Puck, Casper's Mom's a Milf, Scout and Foxglove says the floor is lava, Craig Armstrong, Dulcet DeLeche, Zachary Langruer, Get Out of My Booth, Bug, Sad Angry Crab Man, Chuck McFinley, Hazel Hayes, Velocity Girl42, Little Dragon and a Cauldron of Bats, Ben Carlisle, Larry Fisherman, Anna Kearney, Ashley Strange Lilia, The Four Schnauzers of the Apocalypse, Starblaze Burnbright, Imzuki Yoki, Jean-Luc Gabot, Lonely Isle, Chris Hinkle, Pikeman Stover, Sernoculus the Space Knight, Scrizzles, Flap, Giddy Giddy Giddy, The Firekeeper, Peace Reaper, The End is Nigh, Jeremiah the Cancelled, Poet Without a Name, Brian Collins, Spike and Faye, Johnny Allen West, The Sketch of Otaku Gang, Wolf, Drake Elias, Fermi's Paradoxans, Speckled Unicorn, Jedi Rides Again, Tevin Longblade's Short Sword, Impatiently Waiting for the TARDIS, Forget Normal, A Damn!

Speaker 4 David Chapman, C.J.

Speaker 4 Johnson, Saggy Bottoms 83, A Dragon Sitting on Its Horde of Dice, Wendell Whitaker, Smivey, Globed Roulette, Andrew Fuller, Danon Deb, The Soup Witch, Fetascini Alfredo, Amalgamous Packs, Pebbles, Heathen King, Effie Rawlings, Nick Borough, Midnight Plumber, Mr.

Speaker 4 Cherry Loves Baby Bach Joy, Happy Anniversary, International House of Yearning, Cynical Warlock, Wayne Heiser, Ellie the Cosmic Janitor, Slev of Bahamut, Umbra Mesaram, Cam and Micah, Omi Gracie, Cal Artin the Tired, A Ted Named Todd, Fred and George, Sam the Celestial, Ava Maddox Jr., Cassie Williams, Yeet My Boy, 46 Toolshed 2, The Image Collector, Blended Music, Lizzie R., Definitely Not Kevin, Poosh Lynchin, Sitting Squirrel, Patricia E.

Speaker 4 Melt wishes everyone a less traumatic than expected 2025.

Speaker 4 Red the Gray, I needed someone to make the TARDIS reference, Couch Potato Alex, Gregory the God of Chaos Sitting Down to Tea with the Other Beings of Chaos, Never Child, Athanasios Nasir Shou Kot, Kiboko, Lil Kev, Kozamine, Jonathan Burton, Mr.

Speaker 4 Man and Lady, Joey B., Ali Malik, DJK, DJK, Mix Mixed Terran Van Edinger, Sandalwood Mountain, Whimsical Fuckery.

Speaker 4 From your point of observation, Warranty Lady both has and has not had a successful bottom surgery. Thanks, Schrödinger.

Speaker 4 Patricia the Time Lord, Mango Connoisseur, Owen Sucito, A Gently Sucked On Chili Dog, Glory Cole, Janelle Miaonet's Cat Butler, The Gentleman, Rest in Peace, Dear O'Sheen, Alex Berry, Eden DePoussay, Andrew Oakden, I Only Listen for the Names at the End, Avalon, Asymmetrical Exile, Magpie Cat says everything's a bag of holding if you know how to pack.

Speaker 4 Eliza Travels the the Universe, Mike Anzavino, Lindsey Bowen, The Goddamn Podcast Lawyer, Alex Spence, Galaxy Britches, Angry Ron, Durka Dub, Gloria's ex-girlfriend, Kelly Clickspring, The Wild Thistle, I Hate Samores, James Harlow, NecroPants Salesman of the Year, The Cosmos Cruising Cadillac, I'm Not Joe's Dad, Jasmine James, Dr.

Speaker 4 Caber Ant, Me as a Baby, Michael Odom, Zero, Anatha, Zandria, Jennifer Calkins, Guacamolio, Midday Burger, Don Parks, Throat Goat666, Princess Leia, Fish in a Bag, Andy Loves Clouds, Dustin's Goose, Prime Freak, Walter Piakarsky, Droid Pirate Findly, and his Ruben-esque Parrot, Stuck in a Pit of Skittles, Drunken Coyote, The Impersonator Known as, Tony Piakarsky, Adrian R., Phoenix, Kimberderp, Mr.

Speaker 4 Tims, Dead Weight, The Harbinger Pulsar, Cremulous is just happy to be here, Kinetic Fox, The Twisted Twigster, Six Seasons in a Movie, Faye Queen, Chase Noseworthy, Core, Oopschnart, the Probability Demolition Expert, Mason Jeffrey Showtime Hester, C.R.

Speaker 4 Iptid, For My Mother, Homer, Are We Doing Crimes? Two Vegetarians and a Toxic Relationship with Burger. CCTX Girl6823 Waiting on the Diner.
Melissa Winskill, Nicole Studioso. Sign my shovel.

Speaker 4 A talking dog named Bronk. Just a potato.
Indigo Escargo. Love My Captain.
Joe Malma. Castriff.
Ames Affection for Internet Protection. Retro MG.
Snarky Bark00. The Cowboy.
Gainesville Fear Garden.

Speaker 4 Abby Kramer. We have No Lana Bananas Today.
Utred and Rose's Viking Void Vittles. Not Sure What I'm Doing.
River Brown.

Speaker 4 Senior Deuce, Scullacy, Warped Writer, Tim Nacy, Ruben Klamso, Scrambled Eggs, Morgan Brockman, Sylvie, Charlotte Tobiah, Glennis Thompson, Dustin Watson, Betty White 813, Good Grief People, I Need to Breathe, Starscribe, Lucian Thunderstruck,

Speaker 4 Oh, Mamama, Drought Breaker, Glorbnar 7, Dooser likes no thinky, just Dewey, the other Adele. I named my cat Laif, and it made him an evil genius.
Chef Galval, Leah Hall, Sarah May, Mr.

Speaker 4 Arnie Arbuckle Sr., Sierra Not from Arkansas, Z-Go, Ebenezer Boob, Caleb Tubayala, Jason Woods, Arnie Arbuckle Esquire, Jake Cascade, Digital Floof Lost in Time, Potion Maestro, The Milkman, Nebula Nell, Regulators, Mount Up, Mad Yogi Eileen, Mr.

Speaker 4 Meepod, Palace, Ethan Cobb, Big Moe, Brian O'Neill, Edward Pena, I am Annie, I live forever in every moment I've existed. I swear to every star in the cosmos, I never forgot it was a gift.

Speaker 4 The Stone Fox, Solivia, Kyle from Detroit, Juiciton, Marauder Mitch and Pandergast, Papitos, Boomhauer, Ninja Grimm Reaper, Reaper, Miles Nelson, prove to me that orange cats aren't gods, Britwards, Ashley Soros, Momo's Mama, Tony Tony Tony, Ivy Paisley, Toast, Sue Watts, Fickle Phil, Myrtle, Caitlin, Leader of the Unicorn Revolution, Mr.

Speaker 4 Triggvy, Printing with Cats, Riley, Khaleesi Del Mar, Dixie Dinah, Amanda Noscarella, Jose Zetino, Sonny Stagg, a representative of the Pill Owls, KBS 1017, Silas Vex, Sarah Jack Sparrow Space Pony, Revibe, Debbie E, Emma, HBD, AJ and Aaliyah Owalewa, Mommy and Daddy Love You, Dusty Ventures, Ronnie Porter, Eagle Rock Lobster, Mary, Like the Virgin, Rosetta, The Phoenix Bird has brought Gabby Painter a kaleidoscope of mystic art.

Speaker 4 Wandering Wenjo, painted Oni, Q Dell, Pharrell, Betty Hayes and the B-Team, Emily with Two E's, Drousy Rousey, Spaceman Nathan, Ramsey's Niblick III, Kerplunk, Kerplunk, Whoops, Where's My Thribble?

Speaker 4 Mad Goat, Jackie Wavelet, Issa the Straga, D. Greitzler, A Gremlin with the Munchies, My Time Has Come.

Speaker 4 Michelle Scaracchio, Genuine Jacob, Andy's Brain is Weird, Space Rooster Randy Doing Crimes, Leopard Donut, Mellow Nuggets, Keychain Crap, Matt Matt Sharkman, Steelo, Arcadia, Bumbling Lily Bee, Scipio Duda, Buffy's Daughter, Emeric, Bufar D's Nuts, Panda, Curtis Lelig, Tristan Stoles, Shadow Rapture, Leaf's Bastard Son Brizzo, Hank the Wonder Llama, Russell, Zephyrus Wind, Just a Regular Fox, Jeremy Ibsen, What the Hell, Cineplex, and all the black people in North Carolina.

Speaker 4 Just Rachel, Danger Girl, Atlas Bear, Torresmash, The Podcast for Nerdy Jews, Axel, Patty the Ginger, Ava's Cigarette Ash, Tim Lynch, Boisenberry, aka The Boys, A, Zeus, Anaphylaxis, Jack's Nightmare, Scav with Comtax, Kennan's Girlfriend Brooke, The Subaquatic Goblin Says, Joe, you've done it again, The Kells, on December 2024, Catalina finally became an engineer, Jenny on the Blockchain, Angry Leaf's Lasersaw, Magnus Aerochill, Amy Perry, Christopher Kai, Skexies, Randy's Amigo, Gremlock, Katie Mermaid and the Delinquent Duo, Norman, Nicole, WitchyCat13 Loves IPAs, White Mountain Chicken Nuggets, Max Danger, Security Chief Shatzi, The Anxious Peach, Team Michelle and Billy, Naeonix Reno, Robert Frankenberry, High Life, Elden's Father, Mr.

Speaker 4 Smarty Pants, Honeybee, Nordlebash, Jordan, Rwin X Pelasco, Ryan Rosinski, Average Height, Medium Rage, Audio Monkey, Joe, Team Hefeweisen, Monica and Mason K, Tony Wants to Be Laife, Rowan, Lady of the Black and Herald of the Stars, Ryan Burnett, The Most Glitter-tastic, Joyful Goth in the Triad, The Timid Ghost 23, Xivia's Mom, Dr.

Speaker 4 Dr.

Speaker 4 B, Zoprez and the Bumble Army, Growing Into My Farm Boots, The Geneva Accords, Brothers of the Cosign, Uncivil Gnomes, The Rat Queen Evelyn, Great Lunch Conversation, Your Humdinger Moonbringer, Letty Lou, Tibby.

Speaker 7 He was a shifty one, that Nick Howard.

Speaker 4 Kinger was here. Bobby Ray Winland Jr., Bebop Be Dabba Doo Wop, Warped Echoes, Lord Robert O'Tartis, He's Bigger on the Inside.

Speaker 4 Jeremiah Franco, Isaiah Coleman, Celestial Warlock, Gabby Hayes, My Wigglebuts, Gothic Rainbow, So We Made It, Micah Collins, Cody McClure, Eternal Champion, Jingalos, Eris, Goddess of Discord, Hasmatilda, Ditzy Bay, Just Your Average Reese, Kyle Church, I Am a Lafe on the Wind, Static Ego, Some Farting Fart Wizard, Lolly, Evan M.

Speaker 4 Dobson, Going to Be Lit, I Am Shaggy, Captain Emerald L, Wayne Hall, Danny Mars, Omega Nye, Frank and a Field, Sally Cell Seas Shells by the Seashore, Colorado Southpaw, Fuzzle McBumpernitz, Nelix Tiny Wolf, Christina Sennett, The Red Planet, Shane Robertson, Definitely Not an Android, Seriously, I'm not.

Speaker 4 The Wandering Welshman, Whatever Tabby, Carolyn Harper, Nikolai Tolkachev, Capo the Sartorius, Z3DT, Shy Sparrows, BLTN, Scott Gygax, Glenn Morris, Crushable Hale53, Tequila Mockingbird, Damarin, known to the Otters as Slippery Slope, Locksmith Andy, Iso Pale, Rose Alt, Hopeful Ghost, Neith the Milkman, Mags the Conqueror, Wes and Heather have made it, Girl Scouts with a K and a Z, Eric, Katie Kate, get your colonoscopy, it's the Grand Chalky's birthday, Victor Cassados, Smiggs, Emily Shmemily, Work for Melvis, Bohogo, Bye-bye for Jojo, Pogo, that's a no-go, bro.

Speaker 4 I am Lure of Planet Omicron Percy I8. Kneel before your supreme ruler.

Speaker 4 Taibo, Mystixy, Baby Baiton Lee, Karen Gallagher, Kyle Perino, Amber King, Sid the Sloth on a Bike, Priya Gandhi, Wandering Mermaid, understands the assignment. Lil Stevie Pie, return to Cinder.

Speaker 4 Two Polar Cat is back and has Molotov cocktails for everyone. Did someone say fangs out? Carl, the teller of dad jokes, at least six gyms.

Speaker 4 Skylab's multidimensional, multiphasic, intergalactic quantum cyberverse.

Speaker 4 Verde Soul, Galen Miller, Tess, Geriatric Young'un, Mystic Hippie, Unforkable, Supercalifragilistic XP Alex Nickel, Daniel Nitz, Mavis Bacons, Kelly W., Holly Hooten, Pyro's Calling, Joe Suasian, Too Many Jans, Cat Jot, Pamela Rose Eltiera, Then Stina Says, Countess of Carbon, Slappy the Squirrel's Ted Slapping Rampage, Luminous Elk, Rodian Caution, Love is for the Nierds, Taz Hernandez, It's Just Tyson Now, Joe is the Writer's Room, Awkward Heretic, Devin7777, Troy Aker, Mandy Kane, Estelle, Kim Sell, Silly Goose, Honk Honk, Ghost Saber Wolf, Sleepy Mystic, Sarah Joy, Taters, Precious, Teddy of the Wasteland, Daniel Gregory, Dr.

Speaker 4 Glass, Sweets, Char Noble 1610, Mere Tender Creatures, Amanda Short, Chut Brimble, Deidre, Mike Whiskey and Your Friend Frosty, Baba De Bibby Ba Boop Boo, Ben Bar, Beastly Deaths, Ven the Unlikely, Cognito Hazard Expunge, Ted Wasanasen, Virestria, Spoomples, Fernwood Gal, Twinkle Tots, Shocking Developments Nearby, Phantoms Moms, Callison, Horn Swagglin Daniel Arthur, Mike Laclusi, Dex, It's a It's a Fucking Dog Rapture, Abigail Lahou, King Humble, We'd Better Ask Dave, Wind Chimes for Safety, Cameron Winterborne Welsh, Fireball XL5, Whatever's Clever, Alexica Habaniera, Cone Stranger, One Batty Bat,

Speaker 4 Matt N, Julia Kringlin, Frelp, M.

Speaker 4 Lin, Feedba Fish, JRR on SFP, Lahari, Rekka Ayumu, Teds Loves Catherine, J Spark, Eevee Girl, Lucid Harbor, Little Lily Leopard Paws, Diet Night, Mars Royalty, Take 20 Damage, Maisie's Bandstand, Kimbob, Battle Pope and Bugaboo, Snorts McGorts, Fresh Squeezed, Patrick Holt, Atlas B, Hold It Now, Hold it Now, Hold it Now, Hold it Now Hit It!

Speaker 4 It's the Police, Open Up! We just got a noise complaint about too many people hitting it.

Speaker 4 Bradley Ashby, Peter, Megan Okeo, William Dyer, Vicky Abear, Brad Munier, Jane, Hannah Dale, Phantom Zone, Stebby Cacti, Crystal Delightful, Gruntled, Killshot Betty and her steel-eyed bow, Jackie Lowie, The Little Pigeon, Quentin Elizabeth Jones, Crazed Bear, Evinola.

Speaker 4 Fun fact: Raccoons don't hibernate. Dr.
Lattice Trash Angel is going to keep this up year-round. Noble Barrel.
Yes, my brain is weird. Thank you.
Bippity-boppity boom.

Speaker 6 Megan the Meg Young.

Speaker 4 Baby Bears Love the Diner.

Speaker 4 Corey Morose, Russell Bunny, Jane G, Max Savage, Apprehensive Craig, Tim Araneta, Bacon, Nicole Studioso, Rambo, Chaos Squatcher, Stephanie Sturgis, Kirsten, Hurry Up and Wait, Sarah Farmer and Her Prismatic Chickens, Criddle, Heidelberty, Tom Webster, Rashmi Vinkatesh, McClump, Rad Dolls, Salazar the Dome Age, The Bard with the Tuba, Hayward's Finest Garen Elizondo, Terrified Toddler, Sir Shetzalat Strikes Again, Damn Animal, Ashton James, Elspeth, Skyland, ALR, Sidewalk Jam, Sarah Maguire, Tonka 2005, Cruz and B.

Speaker 4 Anthony, Time In Simon Normalmark, Tybalt I, Stephen Schmidt, Xavier Romo, Tess Bart, Alley Frog, Trey the Turquoise Tortoise, Talon Lawson, Freya Titmittens, Corey the Frogologist, The Fontucky Wrangler, Jessica Shelton, Scram Brulee, The Singing Loon, Zuzana, Celeste Yost, I'm So Antigone Fun, Infinity Times Infinity, Noah and Katie, Joe R., Justin at the Tree Cave, The Amburgler, Boodles, Reaper, Osvaldo Simeoni, Siobhan Delilah Rose, Ashley Chapel Peoples, Ryan Ortega, Zehoni Veda, Barbarian Bloodbath, The Defenestration of Teds, Corrine Sabrantha, Beatrice Bodacious, Kyle of Light, Rubius Fuzzlebutt, K-Mack, The Something Something Detective Agency, Hayabuddha, Eli the Electrician, TNB Lemmy, Charmay, The Wondrous Methazophon, Perstafanon, Hashtag Nissan Acura, Finnegan Robert, Flat Doug, Trinket Coralee, Deary Darling, Bookshift Managed, Ambient Drifting Man 80, Chris Hancock, Nicole 23, Gracefully Impaired, Tired Pirate Muffin, Jay Snooston, Laura, Roman Ronin, John Pruitt, Camel Pope, Inschuldigen, Cryptesia, Rebecca Trossel, Mitzi Liu, Kelsey Home, Casper's Number One Fan, Amanda Marie Cath Rain, Damien The Goddamn Time Lawyer, Deli Cruise.

Speaker 4 It's okay now, Joe Fisher, Matt Mosby, Saint Fu, Harry Fishnuts, Joshua Cody, Extranaweeb, Ghost Blade Heidelon, Starlight, Berserking Off, David Piorini, Techno Ranger Rick, Joe's Wheeze Laugh.

Speaker 4 Mossy would come up with a cool name, but sadly, she's just Mossy.

Speaker 4 Lacockne Lacockney Francaise, Virgo Aries Infinity, Vest Buds Danny and M, Ashley, A Bug Named Nat, Potato Nation, Cece Ryder, Hunter B, Rudra, Rusty Accord, Death the Kid, Big Whiskey, Magic Pony, Robert Oliveri, Dan Bowman, Paul A.

Speaker 4 Johnson, Killer Odd, Dandy Bay, The Green Street Major. Dr.
Punt Gusher Esquire gets to stay up till midnight sometimes, cause it's called Midnight Burger for a reason.

Speaker 4 Creator67, Bajolanth, Life's One True Love, Mermaid of the Dark Seas, Cosmic Shrugged, Incorrigible Ross, Deborah Wales, SCRB Mark11, Courtney Depona, Reidel the Beetle, John Dew, Maggie's Yarm, Stew, Anthonomy, Megan Mighty, Purple Saline, Miss Chris still making sandwiches, Three Legs Are Perfectly Good, Drew and LA, Captain Blepp, Eevee Power, Your Favorite Kenny, Terry, PJ Says What?

Speaker 4 Danielle L, Shiny Melon Fear Now, Blargo, Blargo, Blargo, Tonight at 11, Doom!

Speaker 4 Ilate Raul, Hicks Bezi Mates, Disco Funkslinger, Zealous Pragma, Tuba Rick, Princess Donut The Queen Anne Chonk, It's Just Blake.

Speaker 4 Alice Malis asks, how many chains could two chains chain if two chains could chain chains?

Speaker 4 Sir Cat Dad, Kelly Jane Danky, Aaron the Optimist, Thomas Stolen, aka Casper from Another Universe, Lucrezia, Andrew Barner, Tamara Oliver, The Real Dirt Fairy, Marissa, Broccoini, Ava, No, Not That, Ava, The One within

Speaker 4 Grimm, Zacky Nat, Underwater Corvid, Spizzarinctum, Michael Christian, Ransom, Marun Maisalil, Late Indeed Again, Theron Pyralis, Om Vega, Aaron Mitchell, Lady Keonu Myson, Fiona Malisey, Onyx Rose, Jackie Wavelet, J.R.

Speaker 4 the Hiker Bear, Velocicate, Al Cave, Krusty McBeardface, Tracy, Maloran, Brian Barletta, Sweet Michelle, Kara, Call Me Zen, Calibri, Mel Momberg, Rogue, Laura Geisler, India Holbert, the esteemed throat goad Fred Fredberger, What the Chuck, Sono Nasuno, Ben and Jessica, Nea DeRusso, Peachy Zatowichi, Justine Burbank, Inky the Kraken, Azula the Brave, and their ever-faithful squire Grabthar, Dalek Steve, Dancing Dog Dreams, and existentially, Exhausted Bean.

Speaker 7 Holy shit, my Kindle just quit on me.

Speaker 5 Oh,

Speaker 4 thanks, Jeff.

Speaker 21 I said accidentally weird.

Speaker 4 I said accidentally, accidentally.

Speaker 4 She unloads two shells. I spelled two T-O.
What kind of idiot?

Speaker 5 She unloads two shells.

Speaker 31 We don't have time to take a break right now.

Speaker 32 We're having a two-minute science meeting.

Speaker 5 I approve that reading.

Speaker 4 This reading approved by Julie Starr.

Speaker 7 The Society of Bethanies.

Speaker 10 What? Sorry.

Speaker 5 A what?

Speaker 5 What? What?

Speaker 6 I just look up and it's all...

Speaker 5 I'm sorry.

Speaker 4 I can't can't tell who those middle fingers are for.

Speaker 5 Everyone's on the screen.

Speaker 4 It looks like you're flipping off Tom, which, wow. I mean,

Speaker 4 Boom Boom makes her way across the bar. She has a wooden leg.

Speaker 5 Morning, ladies.

Speaker 5 So I guess it's a trip.

Speaker 4 That's amazing. I think, could we go with Blunt?

Speaker 5 Sure.

Speaker 5 My name is Commandant Blunt of Zurich.

Speaker 7 I'm on an exposition. Expedition.
Expedition.

Speaker 5 Hold on.

Speaker 4 Technically, we're all on an expedition.

Speaker 5 Yeah, we are. We are right now.

Speaker 21 Please allow me to express me.

Speaker 30 Fuck you.

Speaker 5 She's done it.

Speaker 7 Nice work, Ms. Huggins.

Speaker 5 Shit.

Speaker 5 Higgins.

Speaker 5 What did I say?

Speaker 7 No men situation.

Speaker 4 A no-man situation.

Speaker 5 I'm out.

Speaker 5 I call it it now. Hope springs a kernel, Fiona.

Speaker 5 And how do you get out of this crystal? Can you mention it right now? No.

Speaker 4 Hope springs a colonel. What does that mean?

Speaker 5 Don't worry about it.

Speaker 5 Well,

Speaker 6 where you have hope,

Speaker 24 the future is like a seed,

Speaker 5 waiting,

Speaker 5 waiting in the ground. No, and hope is nourishing.

Speaker 5 I'm surprised.

Speaker 5 Hope the seed can become life.

Speaker 22 It's all staticy.

Speaker 5 How do I mute other people?

Speaker 7 It's a treasure map.

Speaker 7 Do you not want me to do it that way?

Speaker 4 I don't know. I mean, I feel like maybe there's a stronger choice.

Speaker 5 Pretty strong.

Speaker 21 Sounds like a challenge to me.

Speaker 5 You got it. Let's go.

Speaker 21 Add the pipple.

Speaker 10 So, what is that?

Speaker 7 It's a treasure map.

Speaker 6 And they leave the user.

Speaker 5 Okay. Oh, sorry.

Speaker 5 I was going to hear you. I was going to hear you.

Speaker 4 Everyone, say all of your lines at once.

Speaker 7 It's a treasure wrap.

Speaker 5 No way. I'm sorry.

Speaker 9 The Fable and Folly Network, where fiction producers flourish.

Speaker 4 Packages by Expedia.

Speaker 4 You were made to occasionally take the hard route to the top of the Eiffel Tower.

Speaker 4 We were made to easily bundle your trip. Expedia.
Made to travel. Flight inclusive packages are at all protected.