The Amelia Project and Midnight Burger Present: Somnium

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Speaker 1 Hello, everyone, and welcome to the Amelia Project and Midnight Burger crossover episode. We are so excited to be crossing over with one of our favorite shows, the Amelia Project.

Speaker 1 Now, I think we know our listeners pretty well, and I'm pretty sure that the Venn diagram of people who listen to Midnight Burger and the people who listen to the Amelia Project is a circle.

Speaker 6 But,

Speaker 1 just in case there are a few of you out there who have no idea what I'm talking about when I say Amelia Project, this is for you.

Speaker 1 The Amelia Project is a fantastic show about a secret society in London that people come to when they want to fake their death and start a brand new life wherever they want.

Speaker 1 We had a great time making this episode with the Amelia Project team, and I have to say, it was pretty surprising how well these two worlds blend together. So, let's get started.

Speaker 1 Once upon a time

Speaker 1 in Piccadilly Circus.

Speaker 9 Excuse me.

Speaker 1 Hi, would you mind taking a picture of my family?

Speaker 11 Oh, I would be happy to.

Speaker 12 Here you go.

Speaker 13 Excellent. Hello there, young man.
This is little Henry.

Speaker 11 He has a marvelously developed cranium.

Speaker 10 Thank you.

Speaker 11 All together now.

Speaker 14 Say cheese.

Speaker 15 Thank you.

Speaker 13 Does it look all right?

Speaker 12 It's wonderful, thank you. It's our first first time in London.

Speaker 15 Lovely.

Speaker 12 Do you live here?

Speaker 14 At times.

Speaker 12 I didn't think anyone who lived here came to this part of town. It's such a tourist trap.

Speaker 11 I do not often find myself here, but today

Speaker 17 something in the air.

Speaker 10 All right, well, thank you again.

Speaker 14 Have a wonderful day.

Speaker 6 Something in the air.

Speaker 6 Something in the air

Speaker 10 Hello?

Speaker 18 What? Who is it?

Speaker 16 Kozlovsky.

Speaker 6 On the telephone?

Speaker 15 Yes.

Speaker 16 What are you talking about? Speakerphone, please.

Speaker 16 Can you say that again?

Speaker 8 Perhaps you should turn on your television.

Speaker 10 Television?

Speaker 16 Okay, what channel?

Speaker 8 Oh, I believe any of them will do.

Speaker 19 What in the world are you talking about?

Speaker 8 It was the strangest thing.

Speaker 8 I awoke this morning and felt compelled to come to Piccadilly's circus.

Speaker 8 Something in the air, I said to myself, lo and behold.

Speaker 16 What on earth is it?

Speaker 22 Is this some sort of pop-up shop, some sort of promotion for some sort of wretched product? Oh, no, I do not believe so.

Speaker 22 Keep watching.

Speaker 8 I am sure they will play the CCTV footage at any moment.

Speaker 16 It's in the middle of the street.

Speaker 25 You simply felt there was something in the air.

Speaker 8 There is a feeling one gets when a disturbance in the weather approaches. It was not unlike that.

Speaker 16 Here's the CCTV.

Speaker 3 What the?

Speaker 19 Well, tweeze my brows and call me delight.

Speaker 16 It appeared out of nowhere.

Speaker 26 Impossible.

Speaker 8 I strongly suggest that the two of you join me as soon as you can. It has become a very interesting day at Piccadilly Circus.

Speaker 16 Is there anyone inside?

Speaker 8 Logic would dictate.

Speaker 16 How can you possibly invoke logic?

Speaker 8 The authorities will approach at any moment. I suggest you make your way.

Speaker 10 Why are we coming there?

Speaker 16 Kozlowski, I don't like this. I think you should come back to the office.
I agree.

Speaker 4 I've no idea what's just occurred, but it certainly doesn't concern us.

Speaker 8 My friends, an American diner has just magically materialized in the middle of Piccadilly Circus.

Speaker 8 Who else on the planet could this concern other than us?

Speaker 1 The Amelia Project and Midnight Burger present Somnium, written by Joe Fisher, Oystein Ulsberg Brager, and Philip Thorne.

Speaker 6 Subtle.

Speaker 28 Really subtle. Where is this? London? Yeah.

Speaker 8 It's not often we sat down in our location so awkwardly, is it, dear?

Speaker 29 I can't recall any time we've sat down right in the middle of the row. That's just plain bad manners.

Speaker 30 It's okay.

Speaker 12 It's not like the traffic in London can get any worse.

Speaker 7 What the hell was that?

Speaker 12 We're in the middle of the road.

Speaker 10 London, right? Yeah.

Speaker 3 This is

Speaker 12 conspicuous. Nothing we can do about it now.

Speaker 1 You know, now that I think about it, how come this doesn't happen more often?

Speaker 3 We never appear in the middle of the road like this.

Speaker 1 How come we don't show up in really awkward places more often?

Speaker 3 Ooh.

Speaker 1 Do you think we've ever killed a wicked witch?

Speaker 12 Technically, we just did that. Are we going to be surrounded by a bunch of billies with bobby clubs now?

Speaker 1 I think it's bobbies with billy clubs.

Speaker 31 Oh, I think we'll get the armed response team for this one.

Speaker 1 Wouldn't it be funny if we just got a ticket?

Speaker 12 Listen, you lot. No parking your cafe in the middle of Piccadilly.

Speaker 30 Move along, then.

Speaker 29 No chance of us doing any sightseeing today, is there?

Speaker 8 I'm afraid we're standing out like wings on a Holstein, dear.

Speaker 31 Why would the diner set us down here?

Speaker 12 Why would you?

Speaker 33 Why would I? Yeah.

Speaker 12 Let's assume it's not random.

Speaker 10 Okay.

Speaker 33 Okay, I'm the diner.

Speaker 1 You're the diner.

Speaker 31 I set myself down in a very busy and noisy area of a major city. I make a big mess.

Speaker 3 People freak out.

Speaker 34 Police, probably on their way.

Speaker 29 You're trying to get someone's attention.

Speaker 10 Right.

Speaker 8 But the attention of whom?

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 31 Popping up in a location like this, it's like shooting a flare.

Speaker 12 Kind of hard to keep calm and carry on past this one. I guess we just wait and see.

Speaker 8 I'm thinking we won't need to wait long, Gloria.

Speaker 1 Is someone parking in our parking lot?

Speaker 31 I mean, it's free parking in the middle of the city. Someone's going to go for it.

Speaker 35 It's a cab.

Speaker 3 What do they call a cab in London?

Speaker 12 They call it a cab.

Speaker 8 Seems to be a woman and her butler and a

Speaker 8 very tall man.

Speaker 10 Thank you, my good man.

Speaker 12 Okay,

Speaker 12 that didn't take long.

Speaker 33 Here we go.

Speaker 12 Hello there! Welcome to Midnight Burger.

Speaker 3 Afternoon.

Speaker 12 What can we get you today?

Speaker 15 I'm sorry.

Speaker 16 You just appeared in the middle of Piccadilly Circus. And you're just going to take our order?

Speaker 12 Probably the best place to start, right?

Speaker 10 Fascinating.

Speaker 3 Hot cocoa, please.

Speaker 14 What?

Speaker 6 Hot.

Speaker 3 Cocoa.

Speaker 12 Do we even have any? I can do that. How about everyone else?

Speaker 16 A cup of tea?

Speaker 11 Do you have curly fries?

Speaker 12 No.

Speaker 12 Shame.

Speaker 14 A black coffee, then.

Speaker 12 Are you guys the Secret Service? Um, we are not. The Avengers? The British ones.

Speaker 12 Do you have a sword, Kane?

Speaker 36 I do not.

Speaker 3 Will someone begin talking, please?

Speaker 31 I can sense your confusion.

Speaker 10 Oh, can you? It's called a diner.

Speaker 31 You don't really have them here. It's a roadside restaurant.

Speaker 16 I don't think that's anywhere close to the source of our confusion.

Speaker 37 Oh, for heaven's sake, will someone please explain the pure madness that is unfolding in Piccadilly Circus today?

Speaker 3 Midnight Burger.

Speaker 12 It's a time-traveling dimension-spanning diner. We show up somewhere new every day.

Speaker 11 That's preposterous. Yes.

Speaker 25 Where were you yesterday?

Speaker 12 Some planet.

Speaker 35 Who was the officiant?

Speaker 12 Was it your mechanic? Our radio.

Speaker 10 I beg your pardon.

Speaker 8 Afternoon, all. I'm Zebulon Muckawane here with my wife, Effie.
Hi, y'all. It was a lovely service yesterday, was it not, dear?

Speaker 29 It was indeed.

Speaker 29 There was a bit of a language barrier, seeing as how they were from another realm entirely, but there was a universality to our intentions that I think really kept the butts in the seats.

Speaker 8 Most definitely.

Speaker 16 Who's that talking through your radio?

Speaker 12 Effie and Zebulon Mucklewain. Y'all, I can't give you hot chocolate, a tea, and a coffee while you're standing up.
This isn't a cocktail party. Have a seat.

Speaker 11 This booth here looks lovely.

Speaker 16 I think I actually do need to sit down.

Speaker 10 Great.

Speaker 4 Well, you do realize that regardless of the truth truth of your story, the authorities will arrive any moment.

Speaker 12 Yeah, it never goes well for them when they do that.

Speaker 16 So, why do you decide to show up in the middle of a street in broad daylight?

Speaker 12 We didn't.

Speaker 16 Who did?

Speaker 12 We can't really control where we go. There are times when I feel like we can control it a little, and there are times when this place seems to have an agenda of its own.

Speaker 12 But generally speaking, we're not in charge.

Speaker 11 What agenda do you think it may have in the middle of London?

Speaker 12 I'm Gloria, by the way.

Speaker 11 Forgive me, Pietr Kozlovsky.

Speaker 35 Alvina.

Speaker 4 That is a very important point.

Speaker 17 What is your agenda?

Speaker 12 I don't know, but it does seem like anytime someone walks through that door, they do it for a reason. Leif, what was your theory?

Speaker 31 Well, I was just saying, for the diner to make a big mess like this, maybe it's trying to get someone's attention.

Speaker 12 Did we get your attention, guys?

Speaker 10 Um,

Speaker 10 yeah.

Speaker 10 Okay,

Speaker 12 well, welcome to Midnight Burger. I'm Gloria.
Oh, over there is Ava. She's a theoretical physicist.
That's Lave. He makes things.
You met Effie and Zabulon, and that's Casper.

Speaker 3 Hi.

Speaker 6 He's old. Mr.

Speaker 38 How old?

Speaker 1 173 years. Give or take?

Speaker 1 They don't believe him.

Speaker 13 Oh, yes, we do.

Speaker 14 We do. Then why are you laughing?

Speaker 10 Old.

Speaker 12 So, what do we think?

Speaker 12 Why was the diner trying to get your attention?

Speaker 10 Um.

Speaker 11 I believe I have a few ideas.

Speaker 34 I believe I.

Speaker 22 I believe my colleagues and I would like a moment to confer.

Speaker 10 Oh, okay, sure.

Speaker 12 I'm making caldo de albondigas. Who wants some?

Speaker 18 Making what?

Speaker 39 Meatball soup.

Speaker 19 Well,

Speaker 18 that sounds lovely.

Speaker 16 I believe we'll just have our beverages, thank you. Sure.

Speaker 12 Just yell at Casper if you need something.

Speaker 16 Thank you.

Speaker 16 So,

Speaker 16 what is your theory, Kozlovsky?

Speaker 40 Yes.

Speaker 4 You said it had to concern us, but so far I don't see how.

Speaker 11 The details are not clear yet, but I believe that if we tell them who we are and what we do, it might become clear.

Speaker 16 Tell them about the Emilia project?

Speaker 16 Absolutely no way.

Speaker 13 Why not?

Speaker 16 Because what we do is a secret to anyone apart from those who require our services.

Speaker 4 Perhaps they do require our services.

Speaker 41 Why would they?

Speaker 16 They have a.

Speaker 30 What was it?

Speaker 16 Universe-travelling

Speaker 16 time-shifting, greasy spoon. It's a diner.
I know. My point is.
They seem to be able to go anywhere at any point. They don't need to fake their deaths and start a new life.

Speaker 16 They can just go beam me up, Scotty, and they're out of here.

Speaker 11 Perhaps this is the very predicament they need to escape.

Speaker 11 Perhaps they are prisoners of a magic restaurant that will never allow them to settle down, never allow them to build friendships, start a family, pursue a career.

Speaker 42 Maybe they want help rescuing those two trapped in the radio.

Speaker 16 What, are you agreeing now? We just put all our cards on the table.

Speaker 4 I think an unorthodox situation might call for an unorthodox approach.

Speaker 18 Besides, if they're about to zap out of here to some entirely different planet, I don't see how them knowing about the Amelia project could really hurt us.

Speaker 16 We don't know that story is true.

Speaker 11 Avina, have you heard of Occam's razor?

Speaker 16 Was it so sharp he cut himself on it?

Speaker 40 Let us put it to a vote.

Speaker 16 You're two, I'm one.

Speaker 19 We should still vote. Why?

Speaker 44 I like the excitement.

Speaker 16 I wish Amelia was here to just cut through this nonsense.

Speaker 35 Show of hands.

Speaker 18 No, wait.

Speaker 26 Let's do ballots.

Speaker 36 I think I have some gum paper in my pocket.

Speaker 1 Okay, what do we think of these weirdos?

Speaker 12 Are they weird or are they just Europeans?

Speaker 31 We magically appeared in the middle of the city and they just walked in the front door.

Speaker 3 They're definitely weird.

Speaker 12 Also, they seem freaked out, but not too freaked out. Like, they've seen some really weird shit.

Speaker 1 They're certainly not the worst people to walk through the door. They seem fine.

Speaker 34 Kind of begs the question.

Speaker 5 Who was the worst person to walk through the door? Jane.

Speaker 41 Jane. Jane.
Jane.

Speaker 33 Definitely. Sadly, I agree.

Speaker 29 They're here for a reason, I'm thinking.

Speaker 8 I agree, dear. Let's not rule out a little divine providence.

Speaker 12 What's the reason, reason though?

Speaker 1 Why would some lady, her butler, and a seven-foot-tall what is he, Swedish?

Speaker 12 I think he's French.

Speaker 1 Whatever he is.

Speaker 35 Why would they be here?

Speaker 29 Y'all, have we forgotten that there is one problem in particular we have been trying to work out for weeks now that we have yet to stick a fork in?

Speaker 14 Oh, right.

Speaker 11 Our passenger.

Speaker 12 She has been here for a while now.

Speaker 31 Not sure how they can help with that.

Speaker 31 Unless there's some kind of secret society that disappears people and provides them with new lives, no matter how ridiculous their request may be.

Speaker 12 Yeah, that's unlikely.

Speaker 35 I have conferred with my colleagues, and we have decided, cards on the table, we are the Amelia Project.

Speaker 35 A secret society that disappears people and provides them with new lives no matter how ridiculous their request may be.

Speaker 10 Huh. Huh.
Huh. Well now.

Speaker 29 Once again, I am humbly staying silent when divine providence makes itself known.

Speaker 3 I can hear you, though.

Speaker 12 Well, it's a good thing you're here then.

Speaker 12 You have a customer.

Speaker 12 Let's get you some puppy jackets.

Speaker 34 This

Speaker 34 is not a deep freeze.

Speaker 12 No,

Speaker 12 it's not.

Speaker 12 Take all the time you need.

Speaker 12 Where are we?

Speaker 10 Another world.

Speaker 12 Yes, it's funny, we never named it. We just call it the deep freeze.

Speaker 14 How far does it go?

Speaker 12 Ava, did we ever. It's about three times the size of Jupiter.

Speaker 14 My goodness.

Speaker 11 Have you traveled through it extensively?

Speaker 12 No, we pretty much stay in this area. Calculating the curvature of a celestial body using the sun is pretty easy.
Even Leaf can do it.

Speaker 11 I must see more.

Speaker 12 Her camp is this way. Follow me.

Speaker 3 Hey there.

Speaker 1 How are we doing?

Speaker 1 I'm Casper.

Speaker 16 Auvina.

Speaker 1 Where are you from?

Speaker 9 Samson.

Speaker 10 Cool, cool. Is that a

Speaker 10 big city or a town or it's a microscopic island off of Briar?

Speaker 1 Which is a big

Speaker 16 island? Which is an island off of Tresco, which again is an island off of St. Mary.

Speaker 16 Which is an island off the coast of Cornwall.

Speaker 15 Cornwall!

Speaker 25 We made land.

Speaker 1 I have heard of that. So you're from

Speaker 1 offshore?

Speaker 16 I'm from a place that is pretty much as remote as anywhere you can get in Britain. Me and my mum used to joke it was like living on another planet.

Speaker 1 I'm from Ohio, originally. Then, uh, California, a lot.
Sacramento. All up and down the I-5 corridor.
Barstow for a while, sadly.

Speaker 10 But now, I'm

Speaker 13 actually on another planet.

Speaker 16 And.

Speaker 10 Yeah.

Speaker 15 You know what's funny?

Speaker 1 Anytime someone sets foot on another planet for the first time, that's the first thing they say. I'm on another planet.

Speaker 23 It's very simple.

Speaker 16 How is this possible?

Speaker 1 And then they follow up with, how is this possible?

Speaker 13 I'm serious.

Speaker 1 The door to our deep freeze leads to another planet.

Speaker 10 Yes, I caught that.

Speaker 1 Okay, then you know as much as I do.

Speaker 10 You

Speaker 16 go about your day knowing there's a gateway to another planet in your deep freeze.

Speaker 33 How do you get anything done?

Speaker 15 Well,

Speaker 33 let me ask you this.

Speaker 1 As you go about your daily life in your world, how much do you know about how it works?

Speaker 1 The streetlights turn on when the sun goes down. How do they know? You assume it's some sort of process involving computers and electricity being rerouted on some sort of timer, but you assume that.

Speaker 3 You actually have no idea how it works.

Speaker 1 How do the trains run without crashing into each other? You assume there's a system there, you don't know what it is.

Speaker 1 If memory serves, you have a complicated barrier on the Thames to keep it from flooding the city. It's this massive thing.
How does it work?

Speaker 3 You probably have no idea.

Speaker 1 We spend all day in a world we know practically nothing about.

Speaker 1 Our world is just a little fancier.

Speaker 16 Well, I'm sure if I took an afternoon off, I could figure out how the Thames barrier works.

Speaker 1 And I'm sure if we took the time, we could figure out how the deep freeze works. We've just always got something else going on.

Speaker 16 Things like what?

Speaker 1 Things like three people walking in the front door calling themselves the Amelia Project.

Speaker 1 Come on. You can't enjoy it if you're too busy being astounded by it.

Speaker 3 Come meet the wolves.

Speaker 9 Wolves?

Speaker 1 No, no, they're great.

Speaker 5 It's fine. Come on.

Speaker 12 The laws of planetary motion. Number one, planets orbit the Sun in an elliptical orbit.
Number two, a planet moves faster when it's closer to the Sun.

Speaker 12 Number three,

Speaker 12 planets that are further away from the sun have longer orbital periods.

Speaker 3 Why are you saying this to me?

Speaker 12 Those are the laws of planetary motion. Created by who?

Speaker 25 Johannes Kepler, I believe.

Speaker 34 Great.

Speaker 12 Yes.

Speaker 12 He was one of the big ones. Kepler had an idea.
He wanted people to get their heads out of the sand and start looking up.

Speaker 12 He wanted his ideas about heliocentricity and the solar system to be presented to all types of people, people who aren't necessarily astronomers.

Speaker 12 How do you do that?

Speaker 12 How do you get people to look up?

Speaker 6 Pointing?

Speaker 12 You tell them a story.

Speaker 12 He wrote a fairy tale called Somnium, a story about a young boy and his mother. The boy's mother was a witch, and she summoned a demon that took her and her son through a magical portal to the moon.

Speaker 12 While they were there, they visited a city city on the moon and observed the solar system spinning the way Kepler theorized it would. It was a simple story, no big deal.
But here's the problem.

Speaker 12 People hate to read

Speaker 12 and they love to gossip. Some people didn't get the memo that Kepler was writing a fictional story.
Suddenly, throughout Europe, People were saying, hey, did you hear about Kepler?

Speaker 12 His mom's a witch and they went to the moon using demon powers.

Speaker 4 People actually believed that story was real?

Speaker 12 Well, it was 1608. Everybody had their heads up their asses.
When the news reached the wrong people in Germany, Kepler's mother was arrested for witchcraft.

Speaker 23 Where are you taking me with this story?

Speaker 12 Kepler schlepped his ass across Europe and spent five years defending his mother. That's five years he could have spent studying the universe, and he spent it arguing with the German witchnarks.

Speaker 12 So there we are in Germany. Right time, right place.

Speaker 12 I convinced everyone to break her out of witch jail.

Speaker 18 You performed a jailbreak? Yes.

Speaker 10 In Germany?

Speaker 12 Yes.

Speaker 35 In the 17th century.

Speaker 10 Correct.

Speaker 22 Who is waiting for us at the end of this walk?

Speaker 12 Katerina Kepler. Mother of one of the greatest scientists in history

Speaker 12 and alleged witch.

Speaker 21 Why have you kept her in this place?

Speaker 26 Why not the warmth of the cafe?

Speaker 12 She likes it here.

Speaker 12 She says it reminds her of home.

Speaker 42 Well, Germany in the 17th century.

Speaker 22 I can see the resemblance.

Speaker 35 Do you make a habit of abducting people from the space-time continuum?

Speaker 12 Actually, no. This is rare for us.

Speaker 12 See, it turns out... When a magical disappearing diner breaks you out of prison, that has a tendency to support the allegations that you're a witch.

Speaker 18 Who would have thought?

Speaker 12 Long story short, we saved her, but made her a fugitive from her own time.

Speaker 12 So,

Speaker 12 she's looking for a new life, and according to you three,

Speaker 12 that's what you're all about.

Speaker 20 And according to you, you're in a new place and time every day.

Speaker 23 Certainly, she could have stepped off anywhere.

Speaker 12 She's

Speaker 12 particular.

Speaker 10 Particular about what?

Speaker 12 She just keeps saying.

Speaker 30 not right.

Speaker 10 Hardly helpful.

Speaker 12 So if you three are who you say you are, and you're so good at finding people a new life no matter how ridiculous the request,

Speaker 41 find her one.

Speaker 12 Her camp is up ahead.

Speaker 27 I make no promises, but I shall meet with her.

Speaker 12 Good luck.

Speaker 9 Are there any um precautions I should take in this place?

Speaker 36 Do I need to keep a lookout for the white witch?

Speaker 12 No, you're safe. And we've already made all of the Narnia jokes.

Speaker 13 Maybe a bit slow going.

Speaker 22 My German is quite rusty.

Speaker 12 She's picked up English remarkably fast. You'll be fine.

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Speaker 3 Gutenhabend, Frau Kepler.

Speaker 20 Darfich mit inen am Feuersitzen.

Speaker 46 Please do not waste my time fumbling through my language.

Speaker 3 Very well.

Speaker 46 You may see it.

Speaker 46 Sit.

Speaker 3 I am only now realizing that you are surrounded by wolves.

Speaker 46 You have never seen a wolf.

Speaker 13 I've seen them.

Speaker 11 They are just dogs.

Speaker 13 Frau Kepler, if they were just dogs, we would call them dogs.

Speaker 3 We call them something else because they are, in fact, wild animals and not dogs. Oh, goodness me.

Speaker 46 That one is Jan Cook.

Speaker 46 The Spaniard.

Speaker 46 She has given them very strange names.

Speaker 6 It's looking at me.

Speaker 3 I want you to pet him.

Speaker 46 Don't be a bastard.

Speaker 10 Very well.

Speaker 28 Hello, Jungkook.

Speaker 47 So, who are you?

Speaker 47 Why have you come?

Speaker 3 Yes.

Speaker 10 Frau Kepler.

Speaker 25 I represent an organization known as the Amelia Project.

Speaker 46 And you have come here. Why?

Speaker 23 We've been told you're on the search for a new life and have been a bit vexed in finding one.

Speaker 46 I'm particular.

Speaker 46 What does this have to do with you?

Speaker 25 My colleagues and I we specialize in new lives.

Speaker 20 Our clients will ask us for a new life, and we will move heaven and earth to provide it.

Speaker 27 We also specialize in faking deaths, but your strange friends here seem to have taken care of that part for you.

Speaker 22 Whisking you away to the heavens in a.

Speaker 34 well, not quite a golden chariot, but a.

Speaker 13 well, a restaurant.

Speaker 41 A new life.

Speaker 17 Yes.

Speaker 46 They are only given one life.

Speaker 24 An interesting thought.

Speaker 36 One life.

Speaker 38 I myself feel as though I've had a thousand.

Speaker 1 Do you not feel the same?

Speaker 12 I was a young girl. Then a bride.

Speaker 46 Then a mother. Grandmother.

Speaker 40 Precisely.

Speaker 43 Our sigil is the Phoenix, always rising anew from the ashes.

Speaker 47 Lucerus Eihorn was his name.

Speaker 19 The vote of Liamberg.

Speaker 46 He swore to the people of the city that he would drive out all sorcerers.

Speaker 46 I was not the only one.

Speaker 46 There were fifteen of of us.

Speaker 46 Fifteen women.

Speaker 46 Eight of us were executed in the town square.

Speaker 46 The people laughed.

Speaker 46 Not your life for them.

Speaker 6 Why for me?

Speaker 23 Well, we'll come to call this feeling the guilt of the survivor.

Speaker 22 After the initial relief of one's life being spared, a feeling settles about you.

Speaker 36 Why me?

Speaker 22 Why was I spared and not the others?

Speaker 46 Can you tell me why?

Speaker 26 I cannot.

Speaker 27 Though it may have had something to do with having one of the most brilliant men in Europe on your defense team.

Speaker 22 And I am sure he was that brilliant man due in no small part to his mother.

Speaker 46 You know of my son.

Speaker 46 They all seem to know of my son.

Speaker 22 Anyone with even a passing understanding of the sky above their heads knows your son.

Speaker 23 Though perhaps not this particular sky we are currently under.

Speaker 46 It is a beautiful place, yes.

Speaker 46 Reminds me of Wuttenberg.

Speaker 47 Oh, the cold.

Speaker 46 So in my home,

Speaker 46 the wolves were not so kind.

Speaker 22 Your new friends have told me that you've seen many different worlds since you left your own.

Speaker 22 Many places to start over, to rise from the ashes, as it were.

Speaker 3 They've all been lacking?

Speaker 19 They have.

Speaker 43 I propose that your displeasure with all these new worlds is due to your guilt.

Speaker 35 Your guilt in surviving that harrowing experience when others did not.

Speaker 47 I have been alive

Speaker 46 for 75 years.

Speaker 46 No small feat.

Speaker 46 But I refused to confess, and my son refused to give up.

Speaker 3 So,

Speaker 3 I live.

Speaker 46 If I am to be reborn, as you say,

Speaker 46 it must be perfect.

Speaker 46 It must be the final time.

Speaker 46 So, it must be perfect.

Speaker 4 I would also argue that insisting on perfection is an excellent way to prevent one from making a decision.

Speaker 46 It is my life.

Speaker 46 I will make whatever demands of it I wish.

Speaker 19 Very well.

Speaker 10 Very well.

Speaker 23 I agree that this place is beautiful.

Speaker 22 I am unsettled by this place.

Speaker 25 I have seen a great many things, but this, I am out of my element.

Speaker 8 element.

Speaker 25 And I do so love being in my element.

Speaker 35 Lovely planet, but I sincerely doubt they have anything here remotely like Les Du Margot.

Speaker 23 So, in an effort to move this along, I will offer you a deal.

Speaker 46 What is this deal?

Speaker 20 Picture in your mind the perfect place.

Speaker 43 The place that will be the site of your rebirth.

Speaker 43 Picture this place.

Speaker 43 Then you will describe it to me.

Speaker 7 And then, no matter what it takes,

Speaker 40 I will find it.

Speaker 10 Even if I have to build this place by hand, brick by brick, I will find it for you.

Speaker 47 Any place at all?

Speaker 22 Any place you so desire.

Speaker 3 How will you do this?

Speaker 38 I have no idea, but it shall be done.

Speaker 22 All you need to do is tell me of the place.

Speaker 46 Ha!

Speaker 6 Excellent.

Speaker 26 Um, everyone, everyone, stop lurking back there. We've work to do.

Speaker 3 Everyone, gather round the fire.

Speaker 12 Does she know where she wants to go?

Speaker 3 Apparently.

Speaker 1 She's about to tell us. This is fun.
This is like a game show.

Speaker 10 This is a lot of wolves.

Speaker 16 Is this okay?

Speaker 10 They're great.

Speaker 31 Think of them as Disney wolves, not fantasy novel wolves.

Speaker 16 Did they just kill a deer?

Speaker 3 Except for that part.

Speaker 31 Except for the deer killing part.

Speaker 1 I can't believe we're finally getting some movement on this. She's been in our inbox way too long.

Speaker 12 I will, Katerina. I'm standing all the way back here.

Speaker 15 What's that about?

Speaker 12 Katerina's not so hot on our magical radio.

Speaker 11 They claim to be followers of Jesus, but they are fueled by the evil magic.

Speaker 8 We have been nothing but kind to that woman. We've tried every record in our collection.
I even found some umpapa music to remind her of home.

Speaker 42 Poker music originated in Bohemia and not until the 19th century.

Speaker 3 You're trying to remind her of her home by playing music from another country and also from her relative future.

Speaker 34 So, unless you have any Hans-Leo Hustler in your collection, I have very quickly become comfortable with speaking to them like they are people.

Speaker 12 Happens fast, doesn't it?

Speaker 10 Where was I? The bargain.

Speaker 17 Ah, yes.

Speaker 35 The bargain is this:

Speaker 18 Frau Kepler will name her ideal destination, her new life, and it will then fall to us to find her that place, no matter how impossible the request.

Speaker 16 No matter how impossible. Correct.
That leaves a lot of room for faith.

Speaker 40 Indeed, it does.

Speaker 3 But she would have gone on like this forever. The deadlock needed to be broken.
We shall break it by doing the impossible as we normally do.

Speaker 10 So, now that we're all gathered, Frau Kepler, where will your new life begin?

Speaker 46 Lovania.

Speaker 34 Levania?

Speaker 10 Anyone? Shit.

Speaker 3 She's laughing.

Speaker 31 Why is she laughing?

Speaker 12 Here's a description of Lovania.

Speaker 12 The city of Lovania is a marvel of beauty and harmony. It is built on a hillside, and its streets are lined with trees and flowers.

Speaker 12 The buildings are made of white marble, and they are all decorated with intricate carvings.

Speaker 12 The city is also home to many beautiful gardens which are filled with exotic plants and animals.

Speaker 44 That hardly seems a challenge.

Speaker 1 You just described every affluent suburb in America she basically wants to go to Westchester.

Speaker 12 Yes.

Speaker 10 Two problems. One,

Speaker 12 Lavania is on the moon.

Speaker 30 Ah.

Speaker 12 Two.

Speaker 12 Lavania is fictional.

Speaker 10 Uh-huh.

Speaker 12 It's from her son's book, The One That Got Her Thrown in Witch Jail. In the book, the boy's mother conjures a demon, and the demon takes them up to a magical city on the moon called Lavania.

Speaker 44 So she's just fucking with us now.

Speaker 43 Indeed, she is.

Speaker 3 But a deal is a deal.

Speaker 43 Indeed, it is.

Speaker 46 I will wait here patiently while you find for me Lavania.

Speaker 12 Okay, I guess this is going to take a while. I'll get some food started.
I hope everybody likes venison.

Speaker 16 How much time do we have? The London police are going to surround this place any minute now.

Speaker 12 We've actually got all the time in the world because of the gravitational

Speaker 44 gravitational time dilation.

Speaker 31 Time moves a lot slower down here than it does out there.

Speaker 16 How much slower?

Speaker 12 Weeks down here is a few minutes up there.

Speaker 10 Wow.

Speaker 11 Which would imply that the gravity here is far greater. And yet, I feel nothing.

Speaker 17 I know. Weird, right?

Speaker 12 So, we've got time.

Speaker 12 Anyone feel like breaking down a deer with me?

Speaker 11 I would be delighted.

Speaker 42 Great.

Speaker 12 Get over here, big guy. Laif, Ava, Casper, you want to brainstorm some imaginary city on the moon solutions?

Speaker 9 Okay.

Speaker 12 How about some music?

Speaker 8 An excellent idea, Gloria.

Speaker 8 In keeping with our lunar theme, here's the Benson Orchestra of Chicago with Moon of My Dreams.

Speaker 35 Of course, it would be the moon.

Speaker 12 You did kind of set yourself up for failure. You basically asked her to make it impossible.
I had to break the deadlock.

Speaker 39 I get it.

Speaker 4 You'd think that someone who's enjoyed what she has would welcome a fresh start.

Speaker 23 But she seems quite resistant, so.

Speaker 5 The moon.

Speaker 5 I've got some ideas.

Speaker 12 You're surprisingly quick breaking down that deer.

Speaker 3 Thank you.

Speaker 11 It has been quite a long time since I have broken down an animal, but there are so many similarities across the natural world.

Speaker 6 Oh,

Speaker 12 that's

Speaker 15 weird.

Speaker 41 Thank you.

Speaker 16 How can you call anything weird while you're in this place?

Speaker 12 I know what you mean. So, you really just

Speaker 12 show up wherever. Pretty much.

Speaker 16 What's your favorite place you've been?

Speaker 6 Oh,

Speaker 12 it's hard to to pick.

Speaker 12 There was this really great guy on a derelict spaceship one time.

Speaker 12 I guess that's the thing.

Speaker 16 It's the people.

Speaker 12 Not the places for me. The places are beautiful, but the people

Speaker 12 are from light years away and they might as well be from my old neighborhood.

Speaker 12 Universe after universe of people just trying to get through the day and maybe needing some help to do it.

Speaker 16 If it's all so amazing, why hasn't she found a place to be?

Speaker 12 Well, you're not getting old right now.

Speaker 16 What do you mean?

Speaker 12 It's a shifting point of no entropy or something. When you're here, time doesn't pass.

Speaker 12 According to Ava, when Kepler finally got his mom freed from prison, she died soon after returning home. As soon as she picks a place, she won't be there for long.

Speaker 12 She's picking a place to die.

Speaker 12 That's a hard spot to find.

Speaker 16 You don't age?

Speaker 12 No. So how old are you? None of us have been here that long.
I'm not from the 1800s or something.

Speaker 12 But Casper?

Speaker 12 Casper's been here a long time.

Speaker 16 Are you all looking for a place to be?

Speaker 6 We were.

Speaker 12 We found it.

Speaker 1 There's a city on the moon.

Speaker 10 Oh yeah.

Speaker 3 I mean, there was in my timeline.

Speaker 31 I'm assuming there's one in this one.

Speaker 25 Certainly it would have been seen by now.

Speaker 32 It's on the dark side of the moon.

Speaker 1 Oh, so we can't see it because it's always dark there.

Speaker 22 Casper, no, we've seen the dark side of the moon.

Speaker 1 We haven't seen the dark side of the moon.

Speaker 5 It's always dark there.

Speaker 3 It's not.

Speaker 12 Is he doing his dark side of the moon thing again?

Speaker 15 Yes.

Speaker 12 I love it.

Speaker 1 It's called the dark side of the moon.

Speaker 4 I've seen pictures of the dark side of the moon.

Speaker 1 Well, they must be pretty dark pictures. It's cloaked.

Speaker 31 Hiding things from Earth is pretty easy.

Speaker 1 Yeah, easy because it's in complete darkness all the time.

Speaker 17 Casper!

Speaker 12 No, keep going. He literally can't get it.

Speaker 35 What is there to get?

Speaker 1 It's the dark side of the moon.

Speaker 44 It's always dark there.

Speaker 6 No, it's not.

Speaker 3 Yes, it is.

Speaker 41 It's like giving a calculator to a gibbon.

Speaker 10 I'm moving on.

Speaker 31 There's a city on the dark side of the moon.

Speaker 32 More like a small town.

Speaker 3 What goes on there?

Speaker 31 It started as a relay station for something called Earth Portal, but, you know, the people who worked there had to live somewhere. And then someone decides to open a general store, then a bar.

Speaker 34 It's not a bad place.

Speaker 35 And she could live there. Theoretically.

Speaker 1 She's not going to be depressed living in all that darkness.

Speaker 31 Do I literally have to show you a picture?

Speaker 41 No, don't ruin it.

Speaker 12 His stupidity is too beautiful.

Speaker 42 What are you talking about? If you can get her to agree that this is as close to

Speaker 3 what is it? Lavania.

Speaker 31 As close to Lavania as we can get, then we just need to find a way to get her to the moon.

Speaker 13 Oh, is that all?

Speaker 3 I mean, it's right there.

Speaker 26 It's 400,000 kilometers away.

Speaker 31 And we've never been closer to finding this lady a home. Let's do this.

Speaker 44 Sell it to her.

Speaker 23 Sell her the moon.

Speaker 1 Everybody's got to live somewhere.

Speaker 20 Alvina. What?

Speaker 1 A word? Who's the one in charge here? I'm getting mixed signals.

Speaker 25 It would depend entirely on the person being asked.

Speaker 34 What is it?

Speaker 4 We must arrange a trip to the far side of the moon.

Speaker 1 Where it's dark?

Speaker 35 Where it is dark.

Speaker 6 The moon. The moon.

Speaker 16 Oh, so we're building a rocket ship now.

Speaker 22 Well, ideally, we would simply use someone else's.

Speaker 9 Simply.

Speaker 4 Who do we have in French Guiana?

Speaker 16 Uh, I don't know. I can make some calls.
Excellent. I'm guessing my mobile service isn't great here on another planet.

Speaker 31 If you stand by the door, it should be fine.

Speaker 16 What does French Guyana have to do with anything?

Speaker 33 It's where the ESA launches from.

Speaker 16 And what are we about to do? Duct tape her to a rocket?

Speaker 10 Not a bad idea.

Speaker 12 The visual is certainly funny.

Speaker 26 We need a list of options, however ridiculous.

Speaker 16 Okay, I guess I'm calling French Guyana.

Speaker 33 I'll go with you.

Speaker 32 I've got some questions.

Speaker 37 What is the name of this alleged city?

Speaker 31 Honestly, everybody just calls it Moon City.

Speaker 37 They had the opportunity to name a city on on the moon and decided on Moon City.

Speaker 1 London literally means place of the beaver.

Speaker 22 That is not historically supported.

Speaker 31 Call it whatever you want.

Speaker 17 She's not going to know.

Speaker 12 This is good.

Speaker 12 This is progress. We just need to sell her on Moon City now.
Very well.

Speaker 4 Frau Kepler, we have considered your request.

Speaker 46 It is not a request,

Speaker 46 it is a demand.

Speaker 22 We have addressed your demands.

Speaker 46 Continue.

Speaker 23 You have requested.

Speaker 27 You have requested something quite beautiful, in all honesty.

Speaker 43 You have requested that you be whisked away to a magical city on the moon.

Speaker 22 This was an idea created by your son, a great man.

Speaker 22 He imagined that his mother would weave magic and take them both up into the stars.

Speaker 22 This is not an unusual fantasy.

Speaker 22 Surely there is a time for all of us in our lives when we see our mothers as magical beings. With a wave of a wooden spoon, there is dinner.

Speaker 43 With a wrapping of fabric and a kiss, a wound is healed. With an embrace, all darkness is dispelled.

Speaker 36 For a time, as a child, everyone's mother is a witch, a sorceress, a commander of Eldritch forces.

Speaker 21 And then, as we reach adulthood, the feeling fades.

Speaker 22 We begin to see our mothers as human, valuable,

Speaker 43 as flawed as we all are.

Speaker 13 Though somehow, your son, well into adulthood, was able to imagine his mother as a magical being.

Speaker 22 You wish to honor his vision, as any mother would.

Speaker 46 Then you understand.

Speaker 27 I do.

Speaker 22 As it happens, your son was not writing fiction.

Speaker 22 As I have just learned, there is a city on the moon.

Speaker 22 It is not called Lavania, but there on the side of the moon hidden from our world is a city

Speaker 4 people live there happily and should you agree that this city though it is not the fictional city of your son's imaginings will suffice

Speaker 22 we will send you there where you can begin a new life

Speaker 40 how would you do it

Speaker 12 We're working on that right now.

Speaker 1 It's not magic, but if anyone can get you there, it's this group of weirdos.

Speaker 12 You can just live on the moon? Last I checked, it

Speaker 12 It would be great if you could go to the moon with a brand new body.

Speaker 17 Challenge accepted, madam.

Speaker 12 I know.

Speaker 14 I love it.

Speaker 11 While the others set their efforts toward fashioning you a chariot to the stars, I shall be given the glorious task of transforming you into a lunar being.

Speaker 11 We shall strengthen your bones, we shall enliven your muscle mass and your eyes. We shall make them photochromic to protect them from the harsh light.

Speaker 11 You shall become a creature of the stars.

Speaker 14 And all I require is the the blood of the Spanish prince.

Speaker 30 And the eyes of thirteen albino chihuahuas.

Speaker 19 Do you mind?

Speaker 1 Sorry.

Speaker 16 So, there are no direct launches at all?

Speaker 16 Not for the next three years.

Speaker 16 Great.

Speaker 16 Yeah, I'll call you back.

Speaker 1 What's the deal?

Speaker 16 No launches from French Guiana in the next three years. The ESA is part of the Artemis moon mission.

Speaker 16 They're contributing to the power systems for the manned rocket and are handling the space station that's going to orbit the moon. But they're not going to land.

Speaker 13 That's better, actually.

Speaker 34 How?

Speaker 31 A manned mission isn't going to go to the far side of the moon,

Speaker 31 but a space station will.

Speaker 44 What?

Speaker 16 You're just going to drop her from the space station?

Speaker 32 When's the first launch? Six weeks.

Speaker 15 Okay.

Speaker 9 Okay,

Speaker 9 so...

Speaker 31 You'd need a stasis chamber that can work like a soft lander.

Speaker 44 I can arrange for pickup after she's dropped off.

Speaker 16 You can just deliver her to the moon like she's an Amazon package?

Speaker 15 That depends.

Speaker 14 How's your tech guy?

Speaker 10 He's.

Speaker 10 alright.

Speaker 16 Probably better with explosives than stasis chambers.

Speaker 32 Get him on the phone.

Speaker 31 I've got a very long grocery list for him.

Speaker 10 Okay.

Speaker 10 Hmm.

Speaker 16 Ah, Bonjor Nosavatore.

Speaker 10 I've got...

Speaker 19 a bit of a big ask.

Speaker 35 Ask him to get Luke involved.

Speaker 6 Oh, yes, hell.

Speaker 10 Great idea. Hell?

Speaker 15 Don't worry about it.

Speaker 16 We'll fix the status chamber. It might be shaped like a skull and have glowing eyes, but it will work.

Speaker 3 Rules!

Speaker 14 So,

Speaker 46 you will put me into a cocoon.

Speaker 3 Yes?

Speaker 47 I will transform into a butterfly.

Speaker 24 There on the moon.

Speaker 43 That is what we propose.

Speaker 46 But this is not Lavania.

Speaker 22 It is not.

Speaker 46 I want to ask the talking box.

Speaker 29 I believe she means us, dear. I gathered.

Speaker 3 This is interesting.

Speaker 46 What does your god say about the soul of the fugitive?

Speaker 47 About one who searches for home?

Speaker 8 The Bible says quite a great deal about searching for a home. Much of the beginnings of our faith are stories of the fugitive, stories of the lost.

Speaker 29 So much so that I'd struggle to pick one.

Speaker 8 But I suppose Ruth comes to mind.

Speaker 8 Ruth Ruth was a Moabite woman who married an Israelite. When there was a great famine, Ruth and her mother-in-law Naomi both lost their husbands and were bereft.

Speaker 8 They left the land that was their home and wandered.

Speaker 8 And they found themselves in Bethlehem. The people of Bethlehem took them in as if they were their own and found a safe place in those rolling fields of barley.

Speaker 8 Ruth remarried and gave birth to Obed, and Obed was the grandfather of King David himself.

Speaker 29 It is the fugitive that gives birth to kings, Catherine. Oftentimes, it is the refugee that is the seed of a great land, for only they can truly know the value of having a land to call their own.

Speaker 46 I will not be giving birth to kings or creating kingdoms.

Speaker 29 Well, to hear others tell it, you already did that.

Speaker 29 A great many people have a great many wonderful things to say about that son of yours. Most look up at the stars and see a great mystery, and it seems as though your son looked up and said, No,

Speaker 29 no, it can all make sense. I'll make sense of it.
I'll start at one side of the sky, work my way across, and that will be my life. Makes sense to me for you to rise up into that sky.

Speaker 29 It's a kingdom that he made for you.

Speaker 37 He was

Speaker 40 a good boy.

Speaker 10 Very well.

Speaker 37 I will go.

Speaker 3 Oh shit.

Speaker 9 Amazing. Excellent.

Speaker 18 Alvina?

Speaker 17 Next steps?

Speaker 9 Well, it's simple.

Speaker 16 All we have to do now is escape this alien planet, escape this magical diner that will be surrounded by the police any second, then put Katarina through some very complicated surgeries, have Luke and Salvatore build some sort of stasis chamber, and sneak it on board a rocket bound for the moon's orbit.

Speaker 16 And we have to do all of that in six weeks.

Speaker 23 Simple enough?

Speaker 3 Sure.

Speaker 26 Frau Kepler, gather your things.

Speaker 38 It is time to leave the woods.

Speaker 46 I have no things.

Speaker 46 I only have myself.

Speaker 22 For a journey such as this, that is all that one needs.

Speaker 24 Why is it that the London police are never inept when you need them to be?

Speaker 12 Do you have a plan to get out of here?

Speaker 16 I called upstairs, she's about to pick us up.

Speaker 11 Upstairs?

Speaker 16 That's what we call the boss. Huh.

Speaker 33 And how is she picking you up?

Speaker 16 Apparently, in a helicopter.

Speaker 10 She's on her way. She can fly a helicopter?

Speaker 13 I had no idea. Yeah, I didn't know that either.

Speaker 1 A flying machine? Spends weeks on another planet. She's amazed by a damn helicopter.

Speaker 12 Laif, when are we getting a helicopter?

Speaker 5 I hate helicopters.

Speaker 44 Let's get a hovercraft.

Speaker 12 Not the same.

Speaker 11 And they are always dwelling within the radio.

Speaker 12 Pretty much. I mean, sometimes they have a day out, sometimes they're robots.

Speaker 3 Fascinating.

Speaker 29 I don't like it when the big one looks at us.

Speaker 8 Yeah, I am uncomfortable.

Speaker 46 I will be glad to leave this place behind.

Speaker 47 Too many unknown things here.

Speaker 1 I think your recent experiences with witch trials has made you too paranoid, Katarina.

Speaker 31 And you are too trusting.

Speaker 1 I'm too trusting. You're the one who just agreed to get carved up by Vigo the Carpathian over there.

Speaker 37 I imagine we'll leave you in quite a mess once we've gone.

Speaker 10 Don't worry about us.

Speaker 44 We always let in the customers, but we've also gotten really good at keeping people out.

Speaker 37 Including the entire City of London police force?

Speaker 28 Oh, yes. You.

Speaker 28 You're like my son. Me?

Speaker 28 Sure, in a way. You will guard his legacy.

Speaker 28 After I am gone. Yes.

Speaker 12 I promise. There's no room to land.
You have to climb the ladder.

Speaker 28 It's incredible how it can stay still in the air like that.

Speaker 39 I didn't know you knew how to fly a helicopter. I don't! Now hurry up before gravity finds out.
I'll go first, Katerina, then you follow me.

Speaker 11 Then I will follow behind and make sure you do not fall.

Speaker 28 This has been quite an odd experience.

Speaker 1 You've handled it very well.

Speaker 28 Shall we meet again, do you think? We will.

Speaker 12 We already have.

Speaker 12 We are right now.

Speaker 6 Right.

Speaker 28 Best of luck to you all.

Speaker 38 Midnight Burger.

Speaker 12 Good luck to you, Amelia Project.

Speaker 12 What a strange world we live in!

Speaker 17 Said Alice to the Queen of Hearts.

Speaker 31 Oh, like Amelia Earhart.

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 26 Because she disappeared.

Speaker 12 Yes.

Speaker 5 Now I get it.

Speaker 1 This special crossover episode of Midnight Burger and the Amelia Project featured Anna Maria Everett as Katarina, Shelley Darrington as the woman in Piccadilly, Hemi Yiroham as Kozlowski, Alan Bergen as the interviewer, Julia C.

Speaker 1 Thorne as Alvina, Julia Morazawa as Amelia, Susie Suarez as Gloria, Tom Moorman as Laif, Joe Fisher as Casper, Finley Stevenson as Ava, Julie Cowden Starbird as Effie, and Neil Starbird as Zebulon.

Speaker 1 Production assistants by Marty Parsival, music by Frederick Baden, graphic design by Andres Peterson, and co-produced by Imploding Fictions and Business Goose Media.

Speaker 10 And don't forget...

Speaker 8 And if time and tide roil you too harshly, or diurnal courses leave you with no safe havens, just remember, we're out there, somewhere, looking for you.

Speaker 29 We open at 6.

Speaker 1 Oh, and by the way, it was also brought to you by our Monte Cristo Level and Above supporters. Let's hit it.

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Speaker 1 I hope something good happens to you today.

Speaker 5 Yes, you.

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Speaker 1 Hit it!

Speaker 1 Casey Howe, Bradley Ashby, Ang Ree, Spruce Box, Peter, Megan Okeo, William Dyer, Vicki Abel, Julian Barber, Brad Munier, Jane, Manglerfish, Hannah Dale, Phantom Zone, Stabby Cacti, Crystal Delightful, Gruntled, Kill Shot Betty and her Steel-Eyed Bow, Turtles All the Way Way Down, Jackie Lowey, Quentin Elizabeth Jones, Croat Nation, Ravenheart, Crazed Bear, Ivimola, Dr.

Speaker 1 Lattice Trash Angel, Andy Croft, Petting Dogs, Russell Bunny, The Combat Wombat, Jane G, Max Savage, Jason Rode, The Love Pod Podcast, Tim Arenetta, Black Squirrel, Bacon, Nicole Studioso, Rambo, Chaos Squatcher, Jimmy Snims, Lord Than and Lady Sarah, Stephanie Sturgis, Smelga Snorowitz, Kirsten, Hurry Up and Wait, Sarah Farmer and Her Octopod, Criddle, Arrow of Truth, Heidelberdy, Tom Webster, Rashmi Vinkatesh, Salazar the Dome Age, Terrified Toddler, Ashton James, Elspeth, Charlie DeLambert, ALR, Christian Davis, Sarah Maguire, Tonka 2005, Cruisin' B.

Speaker 37 Anthony, J.

Speaker 1 Way Mythical, Tybalt I, Steven Schmidt, Xavier Romo, Tess Bart, Talon Lawson, Freya Titmittens, Kira the Mermaid, Rubies, Jessica Shelton, Scrim Brulee, The Singing Loon, Zusanna, Celeste Yos, Stepan, Infinity Times Infinity, Noah and Katie, Sarah Murphy, Justin at the Tree Cave, The Amburgler, Boodles, Reaper, Ted Simeoni, Siobhan Delilah Rose, Ashley Chapel Peoples, Ryan Ortega, Cole, Hot Plate of Biscuits and Gravy, Zehoni Veda, Sean Wright, Adelaide Dark, Corinne Sabrantha, Beatrice Bodacius, Kyle of Light, Rubius Fuzzlebutt, K-Mack, The Something Something Detective Agency, Hayabuddha, Eli the Electrician, Sonny D.

Speaker 1 Anomaly, Charmay, The Wondrous Wondrous Methasophon, Liz LaserEyes, Hashtag Nissan Acura, Finnegan Robert, Samira, Flat Dug, Past Prologue, Trinket Coralie, Deary Darling, Banshee Ranch, Bookschiff Managed, Ambient Drifting Man 80, Chris Hancock, Nicole23, Victor in Cincinnati, Jack Lane, Tired Pirate Muffin, Jay Snoosten, Nesbel, Caravan Shaker, Laura, Roman Ronin, Josh Bruitt, Camel Pope, Sammy Baldwin, Posh Baby Rentals Florida, Cryptessia the Donut Bride, Rebecca Trossell, Good God There Were So Many Names, Mitzi Lou, Kelsey Home, Casper's Number One Fan, Amanda Marie Catherine, Damien The Goddamn Time Lawyer, Lola, Deli Cruise, Nan McVicker, Matt Mosby, Harry Fishnuts, Little Ball of Odd, Joshua Cody, Astronaweeb, Saren Far Beyond the Stars, Starlight, Berserking Off, David Piorini, Techno Ranger Rick, Mossy, La Cockney Francaise, Virgo Aries Infinity, Best Buds Danny and M, Ashley, A Bug Named Nat, Phantom Turtle, Potato Nation, CC Ryder, Hunter B, Rudra, Rusty Accord, Death the Kid, Big Whiskey, Magic Pony, Robert Oliveri, Dan Bowman, G.

Speaker 1 Longhorn, Paul A. Johnson, Dandy Bay, The Green Street Major, Podge Art, Dr.

Speaker 1 Puntgusher, Esquire, Creator67, Curtis Charles Sr., Amy Pollard, Genuine Jacob, Moldy Bred Millie, Cosmic Shrugged, Incorrigible Ross, Hess CRB Mark 11, Courtney DePona, LeapFlame, Eliza Smith, John Dew, Maggie's Yarm, Stu, Rick Hausdorff, Nth Anomaly, Meghan Mighty, Quilandis, Wandering Aquarius, Schnoogans, Purple Saline, Miss Chris Still Making Sandwiches, Three Legs Are Perfectly Good, Kingpin, Anomalous Vandal, Antigone Brickman, Captain Blepp, Eevee Power, Kurt Bartnick, Your Favorite Kenny, Chelsea G, Terry, PJ Says Hi, Daniel L, Blargo, Blargo, Blargo, Hicks Besymates, Disco Funkslinger, Zealous Pragma, Tuba Rick, It's Just Blake, Alice Malice, Sir Cat Dad, Theo Alex Dean, Kelly Jane Danky, Aaron the Optimist, Weirdly Nordic Leviathan, aka He Who Was Stolen, Lucrezia, Andrew Barner, Tamara Oliver, The Real Dirt Fairy, Marissa, Edgy Steve, Brock Awini, Zacky Nat, Underwater Corvid, Spizzeringtom, Michael Christian, Vincent Ian, Tarvok Stormbringer, Marun Mai Salil, Late Indeed Again, Theron Pyralis, Dances with Burritos, Aaron Mitchell, Fiona Malasy, Onyx Rose, Jackie Wavelet, J.R.

Speaker 1 the Hiker Bear, Velocicate, Al Cave, Krusty McBeardface, Tracy, Maloran, Sweet Michelle, Cara, HBZen 1805, Calibri, Mel Momberg, Rogue, Menlor, The Dread Pirate Fred Fredberger, Sono Nasuno, Ben and Jessica, Rachel Rachelson, Nea DeRusso, Peachy Zatowichi, Justine Burbank, Ruth McCormick, Dalek Steve, Dancing Dog Dreams, and existentially, Exhausted Beat.

Speaker 1 Her right to the wall.

Speaker 12 The Fable and Folly Network, where fiction producers flourish.