C3 Ep. 72: The High Queen (A Faerie Tale Ending)

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This is a head gum podcast.

Welcome to the campaign after the campaign.

This is not another DD podcast.

Welcome back to Bahumia everybody.

Happy hoglides everyone.

It's the season three finale

or the campaign three finale.

I believe you mean hogla days.

The hogla days.

Did I not say hogla days?

You said happy holidays.

I've heard hoglays.

I said hogla days.

Did I not hit the hog hard enough?

That's the thing.

You want me to hit the hog harder and hogla days?

Yeah, there it is.

That's it.

There it is.

I'm in the spirit of the house.

Happy hoggla days, everybody.

Lather up your polls, hit the hog.

Hi, I'm the hogglades over here, please.

I'm your dungeon master Brian Murphy, joined by Jake Hurwitz.

Making the monarchy frown by breaking the hell out of the crown.

Called her kill day.

Oh, yeah.

Jake, it's been a pleasure recording this show for you.

It's unfortunate you won't be returning for campaign four and whatnot, but we've had an awesome run.

What the hell?

And you're not going to be able to do it.

Is it because I didn't do a hog-based rhyme?

I briefly thought about it.

Unfortunately.

Oh, shit.

That's what we have to do.

I was looking for that.

Yeah.

You do not get a hog liday bonus, unfortunately, either.

I do want the bonus.

And then, of course, we've got Emily Axford.

Okay, I was going to do a different one, but now I'm going to do a hog one.

Ready to snog a hoggly day hog.

Eliab, that trickery.

Perfect.

And this is why we're keeping Emily around.

Really?

Very quick.

I've got an alt.

Can I take it?

Can I take mine again?

Yeah, we could try.

We could try.

Okay.

Okay.

All right.

Fuck Fuck Calder Kill Day.

We're playing as

Hogwan

Shore Hog.

Actually,

I have a different idea.

Jesus.

Do you need a third?

Jesus Lord.

What the hell was that?

Yeah.

What?

I think I have five questions.

Go ahead.

I'll take

it.

First off, why did you throw your character under the bus?

Secondly, why are you hard one short?

Why did you bring hard one into it?

Because

Hog one,

it was easier to do it.

Easier to do.

Yeah.

And then it was hard to set.

Third, I guess, when you said, can I take this again?

Why didn't you wait like 10 more seconds before you fully thought of it?

We edit the show.

Yeah, we definitely edit the show.

That's fair.

That's only three questions.

You have two more.

I have one.

I have one.

And what was the choice to start with your character's name?

That's not what we ever do.

Yeah.

I'm glad you asked, actually.

Yeah.

I thought it would be kind of interesting

to flip the whole script in the last episode.

And I guess I wanted to make the moment about me.

If that makes sense.

A question from me as well.

Did you consider Hog One Squealfoot, maybe?

Just as

a good name.

Wow.

Just as if you wanted to make a good one and see.

See, fifth question.

How quickly can Caldwell replace Jake?

Very quickly.

Not super fast because he needs to play his own character.

No, I'm ready.

I can double up.

He can do it.

I've I've been training.

I've been hitting the weights.

And with that, let's go ahead and throw it to Caldo Tanner.

Born in a dome, not a bog.

This guy loves his eggnog.

And also, happy hog.

Ladaise to all my friends.

It's Saul Buffo.

Wow.

He's just had friends and frogs.

Oh, yeah.

I'm missing the frog with the hog rhyme.

I feel like

Jake, relax.

Everything beyond the first rhyme.

You're extra crap.

You're in the hog house right now.

I danny.

That's the worst thing anyone did.

You cannot talk to Caldo that way.

All right.

The man has two children.

I think they still have paternity leave.

Yeah.

Come on.

Wow, and I just have one, right?

Paternity leave, Jake.

Here, what's wrong with this conversation?

God damn, dude.

All right.

Anyway.

So what is this?

Hot Boy Summer?

What are we doing?

All right.

Let's go ahead and give Caldwell a little reminder.

Let's go ahead and do a little recap.

Yeah.

So last time you battled the Fate Bringer Mages and Charbin with the Automaton's allegiance up for grabs.

Callie used invisibility to successfully aim the Archebus and restrain a mage early on, but the Fatebringers had some tricks of their own, systematically trapping each of you in a maze spell.

Saul was transported to a swamp where an Automoladron version of Queen Jovere urged him to join forces with her to prepare for the danger to come.

She turned his attention to the sky where an astral war was raging, one that will eventually reach the shores of Bahumia.

Calder was brought to the frigid north where he saw a future of death and devastation for his people, but Jovir showed a victorious timeline with her leading a combined force of material, plain, and feywild forces.

Callie was brought to a flaming forest and warned that it was the Feywild's future if she wouldn't join Jovir.

When Callie refused, Jovir revealed that Callie was not in an illusion, but the Beastlands where Oberon had been killed by a charmed marigold.

She watched in horror as the ancient tree burned.

Using stunning strikes, the Archebus, and plain old concentration breaking, you are able to save each other from the maze spells.

During the fight, Kenna retrieved Bear Lane, who tackled Trash Can the Automaton.

Focusing on the mages, you were able to incapacitate the Fatebringers and turn the tides of battle against Charbin.

Once he saw that the fight couldn't be won, he promptly switched sides and killed the prone Fatebringers.

When you weren't buying his alliance and continued to beat him up, Charbin begged to join your side and enthusiastically offered to drink piss.

Saul was able to stop Bearlane from attacking trash can, and she eventually understood that the automatons did not yet have autonomy.

With the battle won, the automatons pledged themselves to you, seeing you as the clearest path to securing a Fae crown, their final command.

You loaded up your ships, hopped on your serpents, and headed back to Garash's floating castle, where the Green Knights and Mob Goblin were preparing for war.

Cyra is set to die, and Jovier is ready to consolidate the powers of the Crowns tomorrow.

And that's where we are now.

Okay.

So, you know that Jovier plans on doing her ritual to make herself high queen and kill Syra at the next dawn.

It is night right now, late into the night, so you can presume you'll sleep a little bit into the day and then spend the whole day traveling tomorrow to get to Jovier's domain in time before the sun rises.

All right, so we can have a bit of a lay-in.

Yes, you guys have a little bit of a lay-in.

Is there anything you guys want to do that night?

You see that your allies from the material plane have not arrived yet, but a lot of your Fae Wild allies are here.

You see Garach is just kind of looking out over the night sky off the edge of this cloud.

You see that Balnor, Albin, and some of the members of the Green Knights and Mob Goblin have kind of gathered around a little bonfire up here.

Oh, that's nice.

Bonfire in the clouds.

Yeah.

What do you burn?

You see

Garage turns around and goes, wood?

Oh, really?

It's got magic fire.

I mean, I think they brought their own wood.

You brought your own wood.

That knighthood is productive.

They've got...

You see, Garage points to all of the airships that are docked up there.

Yes, there's barrels.

There are various materials that can fly.

Do you have anything on you that

is it made of clouds?

We don't bring our own wood anywhere.

Kenna, why do we not bring our own wood?

We have some wood.

Yeah, yeah.

You see, Kenna also goes, I've got a few pieces of woods to like build a tent or something.

Yeah.

Oh, okay.

Is it?

I mean,

you caught me woodland.

Just because we're in the cloud castle doesn't mean everything here has to be made of clouds.

Okay, I'm learning.

I'm listening.

I'm learning.

Yeah, you see, Mogoblin goes, this gun is not made of clouds and just pulls out like a Gatling gun that shoots off.

Oh, be careful where you point that.

Sorry.

This wood thing feels feels like the weirdest thing anybody said today.

I'm serious.

I don't know why we're stuck on it.

It seems pretty normal to me because we can walk on it.

We're wearing our normal clothes.

We're not wearing like cloud clothes.

Yeah, we're not wearing like cloud underwear, right?

No one else is wearing cloud underwear.

What?

You see, Garage goes, well, of course, I'm wearing cloud underwear.

I would love some cloud underwear.

Well, I'll get you cloud underwear.

I'm not going into the battle without it now.

Garage summons a cloud.

You need cloud cups cups actually.

With a little wisp of wind makes you all cloud cups and cloud underneath.

Oh my god, my genitals have never been so cradled.

Wow, I'm literally on cloud nine.

Saul leaps 100 feet in the air.

Yeah, you see, Balnor walks over.

He goes, you guys got, you guys pass out.

You got fresh tidy whiteys over here?

What?

Balnor goes, all right, and kicks you in the crotch.

I didn't even feel it.

Wow.

It bounced right off.

Balnor puts on a pair of fresh cloud tidy tidy whiteys, real dad tidy whities.

Balnor, I'm curious, like, what are the Green Knights talking about over there?

Because I feel like you guys have gone into battle together so many times.

I'm curious what pre-battle energy is like with the Green Knights.

Yeah, well, I think Bobby's kind of speaking to the crew over there

oftentimes will say, you know, if we've got any family we might need taken care of or kind of what our goals for the future are so that so that our fellow members of the Knighthood might might take on our cause yeah sort of a last wishes type thing sort of like a articulating of the north star yeah i think that's uh that's exactly what you're saying

wow i never thought about like

who would carry on my wishes i'll carry on your wishes really yeah what do you feel that you have unfinished that i can promise to quest for if the worst is to happen well i don't know i mean seeing the fae wild and all all the other places in Bohumia, I feel like I want to just keep traveling, keep meeting people, keep experiencing new things.

I mean, I feel like I've just left the dome, really, and there's so much more to see.

Then let's make sure nothing happens to you.

We can carry your lifeless body everywhere we go.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

You know what?

Can someone whip us up a travel coffin?

That's it.

Beautiful thing.

Frogs, we dehydrate really well.

Oh, you could just shove me in a

Yeah, you see Kenna, tears in her eyes, salute to, goes, I will carry your frog coffin everywhere, bazooka.

And what about for you, Kenna?

B.

Yeah, do you have something that if something...

No, you know what?

Look me in the eye.

Nothing's going to happen to you.

Nothing's going to happen to me.

Nothing's going to happen to you.

I go before you do.

Well, don't.

Not necessarily.

A squire has a fire under her ass to protect her dight.

Yeah, but a squire.

Yeah, I'm sorry I said the A word.

but I'm not that sorry.

It's okay.

Balnor didn't hear.

Yay, language, everybody.

Yeah, Balnor kind of gestures over to the fire, kind of takes you guys over to like the edge.

You see Albin standing there too, gives you guys a little nod, and you see Robert the young stag stands up and addresses everyone and goes, The Green Knights will not lose tomorrow.

Because we cannot be killed.

We are the wild itself.

Destroying one will only inspire others the seed of courage spread on the wind ready to bloom in a new generation if i should die tomorrow take my mantle regroup grow fight again

yeah

the nights i'll go like hell yeah man yeah you see like a bunch of people were just like you know look after my dogs

That's really important, actually.

I'm glad that you're getting that squared away.

This one green knight standing next to you, sweating, goes like it is right.

I didn't get shown up by that, did I?

We will absolutely turn the back porch light off.

Yeah, thank you.

Yeah, somebody's got to look after the dogs, and I think I left the back porch light on.

Yeah, I've got a dog sitter, but if I die, you know, they're not, no one's gonna relieve them.

We'll throw away the curdled milk so your refrigerator doesn't smell bad.

That's important.

Oh, yeah.

I appreciate that.

Appreciate that.

Well, I guess I want to know, Callie, Collar, what are your wishes for the future?

What can I carry on for you?

If worse comes to worse,

I think you've already made that promise.

I think that you two have already tied your lives to Licorice and Honeysuckle.

So that's it.

I mean, I guess if something happens to me, save my sister.

Okay, that's easy enough.

Yeah.

Well, it's extremely difficult, but I will do it for you.

That would be...

Those are those are the things that are

most important right now and you colder.

I

feel like

all I've ever wanted is to ride into battle for something that mattered this much next to two people I love.

So

there's no purpose for me beyond this.

But if

somebody could look after my dad's meat shed,

I will be returning there if I get out of this battle for sure.

Oh, yeah, for sure.

I'll live in the meat shed, Mr.

Kill Day.

Thank you, Jenna.

I think, in general, too, if we are successful and I don't make it and there's talking about what the Fey Wild could be, I just, I really believe that this being a place of change that can humble people.

And

that's not a bad thing.

That's what it's always been.

And there's places that aren't like that.

So I think keeping it like that might be a value to the entire multiverse.

We'll keep it wild for you.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Um and Alvin uh calder wanted to know what your wish is for the future.

Oh,

well, that's um that's really kind of you, Calder, especially after the way you've acted this past entire time I've known you.

I gotta take a leak, everybody.

Welcome with you.

Yeah, um,

you see, um, Albin kind of looks off and and does look kind of serious and goes, Well, um,

I don't know if I'd ever have the means to do it but

i think it'd be interesting to try to found another school or magic university

i mean glade home's gone now that was sort of the foremost one and launch pad

was

another

appendage on the long arm of mothership and you know most of those adventures will ended up being total lies including the bathroom of whispers which just felt so real.

So it felt so real.

Well, the bathroom was real.

Yes, that was real.

But it was like rejecting Pepper's ghosts through the film.

The food

was actors.

Yes, so.

Actors coming in.

I think so.

That seems illegal.

Well, I think it was a...

I don't think there were actors in there watching us.

I think that there was like a something playing, so it looked like there were banshees in there.

Yeah.

Sort of, have you ever been on the haunted mansion of Disneyland?

Yeah.

It was like, you'd go in there like once a week and there would be like a new quest that get whispered to you and you'd think like wow I'm the only one that's getting these quests but like no it's just a pre-recorded video then there'd be other people at the quest there too yeah it's just how did you find out we were like how did you other boy wizard and owl pal who are you guys and there would just be other people

so olbi's academy will have like an actual haunted bathroom right wow albie's academy interesting yeah i don't know that it would have any kind of haunted bathroom necessarily i promise you i make this solid Okay, you don't need to make

it.

You don't need to name it after me.

An authentically haunted bathroom.

Haunted bathroom.

One in which the ghosts are totally.

This is perfect.

From the Rolodex to the haunted bathroom.

You've evolved so much.

Yes.

Oh, that's true.

Okay.

You know what?

I'm on board for haunted bathroom.

We put a haunted bathroom in there.

I will concede that.

But no.

I mean, in all seriousness,

you know, it ended up being a lot of projections and stuff, but there were a lot of things that were that were very real.

Um, and he looks at you, Saul, and he goes, uh, friendship, the friendship we made with the, you know, fellow students, those were those were good times, and I would like for other kids like us to have somewhere to go.

Yeah.

I mean, speaking of the wild, your friendship was the seed that grew all of this, Alpin.

Like, without you, I would have been totally lost.

So,

whatever you decide, I'll be there with you.

If you need someone to teach the dumber kids who aren't good at magic how to punch,

I'm happy to do that.

How about the less flexible kids who are the more flexible kids?

Wow,

you're already speaking like an educator.

You see, he uh pulls you in close and he goes, Saul, there will always be a place for dumb kids that don't know how to do magic.

And he gets you, he gives you a huge hug,

and also, and also smart kids who are bad at literally everything else.

That's it.

That's it.

And you see, Kenna

goes...

I guess, like...

So here's the thing about the journey to knighthood.

And I guess you guys probably know it.

Is like...

All this time I've like wanted to be a knight.

But I'm kind of afraid of what comes after this because like are we

I don't know.

Maybe this is dumb.

No, this is stupid.

I don't care.

No, it's okay.

I was just, okay, I was just wondering if, wait, I'm not your squire, if you think we'll all, if we'll be friends.

Kenna, my dream is that you and I fight side by side ass knights, and Calder is our squire.

Oh my god, that is my dream too.

Wait a second.

I want to redo my dream.

That's perfect, Miss Petragor.

Can I be like the little drummer boy?

Don't lean into it.

Saul, I thought you were teaching the dumb kids.

What happened?

Yeah, well, like for one semester, and I'm off.

Okay, you'll be like an adjunct for

ample amount of sabbaticals

to adventure with us.

Yeah, and you see,

Balnor goes, yeah, I'm probably, I think I'll probably hang it up after this.

I'm getting up there in years and, you know, I don't want to slow Bobby down.

Maybe I'll become, you know, a trainer or something train the new recruits.

You really should.

That's a good use of your time.

Oh, thanks.

Yeah.

Alby's Academy could really use you.

Oh, right.

Maybe you could scare kids in the bathroom or something.

No, God, then we're going to get an authentically haunted.

Stop already going to jail.

Sorry.

The hell kind of school you're trying to run here.

It wasn't my idea.

It's Alvin's school.

You see,

Balnor looks at Alvin really intensely and goes, I don't want any part of your school.

And Albin goes, I don't know what they're talking about.

I literally don't know what they're talking about.

I frantically mouth go with it to Albin so I don't

lose shit.

Albin's is mouthing, no, no.

Yeah, is there, I guess, is there anything else you guys want to do that night?

I want to take my displacer scarf.

And I want to shred it and unravel it.

And then I want to use the threads to patch up everyone's jumpsuits.

Whoa.

Okay, so kind of spread the magic around.

Yeah, if that's possible.

Interesting.

Hell yes.

Very interesting.

Okay, why don't we do this?

Saul, go ahead and give me a...

We'll do it as if it's like one of your key attacks or something.

Maybe like a wisdom saving throw.

This is just like your proficiency plus your wisdom, essentially, to kind of try to spread the magic out as you patch your scarf.

You like kind of quilt it onto everybody's cloaks here as you guys get ready for battle.

Would you let me give a bardic?

I would since practicing a craft.

Hell yeah.

Is it D?

My mom used to knit.

Really?

Have you tried this stitch?

Whoa.

It's completely magical.

Just a floating needle that goes through and does flips on its own.

Because of my new monk ability, Diamond Soul, my wisdom is a plus tin.

Oh, yeah, everybody is leveled up.

That's awesome.

Yeah.

You see a little diamond thimble appears on my thumb.

I got a one on my bardic.

That is a 19.

19.

Okay.

So you take your time and you go around and you patch it on like the crew.

You patch it on like Kenna,

Callie.

Oh, I think for Kenna.

For Kenna, I think I make a little handkerchief that she can give to Acriana after battle.

Oh.

That's what knights do, right?

Yeah.

Yeah, I guess that theoretically could.

Oh my god.

You see, she gets so nervous.

We might usually give it before battle.

Oh.

So, like, remember.

But I'll give it after.

But this is actually really bad.

Wait, okay.

I have a last wish.

Okay.

Okay.

Yeah.

All right.

If I die and I die like a dub way, like I just get knocked off the serpent and my corpse like falls to the water.

Wow.

Okay.

Make it not that.

Say that I was 1v1ig Jo Vir.

Okay.

And then you give her this handkerchief.

Right.

Okay.

And I'm going to go.

And you say she lived like a knight.

She died like a knight.

Think about her and say cool stuff to the air.

Yeah, I'll do for you what I did for Hard One, and I'll like write a whole ballad.

Perfect.

Okay.

Very much appreciated.

Wait, that wasn't true?

Giant fucker stuff?

I bought that.

I think it was the giant layer.

You see, Balnor leans in.

You guys go, you guys talking about the giant layer?

We've heard that song recently made it out to us.

We're

making the rounds on the radio.

Oh, top 40.

Yeah, that's great.

That's great.

We're spreading the word.

No way.

You should be getting residuals for that.

So, yeah, Saul, you take the time, you patch up everybody's cloaks and stuff and add the displacer scarf.

And here's how I will say that will work.

Saul, as a free action on your turn, you can apply the magic to anyone for the round who has a patch.

So you can be like, if Callie's really getting beat up, you can be like, okay, I'm going to apply it to Callie

in this round.

Or

to Caldwell.

You're going to have a fully flown response for this.

Thanks.

On your feet, you come up with this.

That's really good.

Okay, damn.

Full disclosure, Caldwell did text me about this, but then I forgot about it.

So I am both a good and a bad DM because I did think of it on my feet because I didn't think of it outside.

Subconsciously, in your dream, you are thinking about it.

Well, that's kind of perfect.

Caldwell's a good player.

You're a good DM.

There you go.

There you go.

And that's why I'm getting Jake's spot.

Can't wait.

But I'm the one that noticed.

Is there anything else you guys want to do before you get your long rest before the battle tomorrow?

Yeah, so I think I'm going to look down at

my mum's winter crest on my sword.

Yeah.

And I'm like thinking of this oath that I made to redeem her and how that's kind of null now.

And part of me is like, okay, well.

She can't be redeemed.

She could be avenged.

And that's like an exciting idea for like a second.

But then I'm like, no,

I just faced off with Jovir, and I feel like I've had a year's worth of anger in one

interaction.

And I think that's not the place I want to live.

So I'm like looking around and I'm seeing these serpents and I'm seeing Calder and Saul and myself and the way that we've kind of like braided our lives with these serpents and

even with each other.

And I don't know if the serpent queen is still alive, but I want to like

reiterate my devotion to her

and

her children.

So I'm going to become an oath of devotion paladin.

Whoa.

Sick oath.

Yeah, it's not really that different, but it just seemed fun like now that redeeming my mother is off the table.

Because you're kind of like reaching out to the serpent queen and you kind of don't know of her fate, go ahead and give me you can do essentially like as if you're casting a spell attack.

You can do like charisma or wisdom plus your proficiency.

19.

You

make that decision to become a paladin of devotion.

You are devoted to this cause of the wild, even if you get nothing in return.

I'm reaching out to that serpent queen and I'm like, I don't know if you can hear this, but I'm thinking about what might animate my sword and

I feel that hate and revenge make me feel so myopic and I don't want a conquest.

I want a North Star.

As you say that,

you look down at your sword, you look down at your luck blade,

and

you see that...

Normally when you do a smite or something, there's like this big burst of star fire.

And you look at it at first and you're like, oh no, have I lost my power?

Or is the Serpent Queen queen dead?

Because it it looks very much the same, but then you notice like a very

subtle glow.

It looks like it's coming off the moon, like it's just reflecting moonlight.

And you see the moon hanging high in the sky.

And then you see there is a star that is glittering just a bit.

brighter than the others and it seems like other ones around them start to dim and you can just see

a

far-off constellation of a serpent.

And you see your

sword alights, and you get this inherent feeling that the serpent queen is alive.

Oh, yeah.

You just can't get to her right now, but she is out there, and she is watching over you.

Okay.

That's very good.

I kiss my sword.

We kiss your sword.

Kelly, did you just kiss your sword?

Yeah, with tongue, Calder.

What of it?

Calder starts licking his sword like a popsicle.

Do you see anyone have bandages?

I know.

So we're all just licking our swords.

You see, Balnor goes, what are you doing over there, bud?

Albin told me I should lick the sword before battle.

Albin told you, God, that guy's a freak.

Yeah, you should hear what he says about you behind your back.

Haunted bathrooms.

He's talking shit about me.

You see, Balnor's been drinking.

Really?

Yeah, he says you're built like a soup cat.

Really?

You see, Balnor gets all indignant and walks over.

You see, Albin is just having a nice conversation with someone.

Balnor goes over and pushes him, and you just see they start to get into a tussle.

And you see a bunch of green knights and mob goblins start to get into it.

See, Ma Goblin goes in to defend Albin.

You see, the young stag runs in.

They all just start wrestling each other.

Okay, save it for tomorrow.

Save it for tomorrow.

That was fun.

Calder, is there anything you'd like to do before you go to bed?

I feel like,

you know, my people have been saved.

I feel really good going into this battle, but um, is there anybody that doesn't have a magic weapon?

Um, because I can use I can cast magic weapon and give somebody like a plus one sword.

Oh, yeah, my weapon is magic, but what about Kenna?

Yeah, oh wow, Kenna, you know, if we are thinking about it,

I think that may be Colder.

Do you want to just officially knight Kenna?

Whoa, because I've got a spell we can make it real official-like.

But is she waiting to be knighted by General Bronzebeard?

Well, is there anything between squire and knight?

Hey, hey, Green Knights.

What's the intermediary rank between squire and knight?

We want to give our girl a promotion, but we don't want to take away.

It'd probably be a squite, I would say.

A squite.

A squite.

A squite.

Let's do a squite.

It'd be sort of, you know, if you're...

Think about it like an Eagle Scout project.

It's like you're almost there.

You gotta just do the one last thing.

Yeah, okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Alright, should we squite thee?

Yeah, let's squat thee.

Are you talking?

We talking about a squite promotion right now, Kenna.

We've been talking, and we think that you're ready to be a squite, right?

And you don't have to kneel to be squited, you just have to kind of squat a little lower.

Yeah,

I could squat to squite.

Yeah,

you see, tears are coming down her cheeks.

I

dreamed of the day that I would become a knight, but I didn't think I would necessarily be acknowledged for my squireliness to become a squite.

It's rare.

Wait, it's rare.

She's squatting.

Spider-Man.

It's rare.

Yeah, she's squatting.

Not quite a knight.

You are now a squite.

And I'm feeling insquired by you.

I'll call Shard up.

I rinse it off from being licked.

And I use the broadside.

I'll just do one shoulder,

a half knight.

And

I squite thee.

And I'll play a bit of ambient music to Cass'Coming of age.

Whoa!

So for the next 24 hours, whenever she makes an ability check, she can roll a default and add it.

Whoa, sick.

It's just ability checks.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

I'm going to say

this isn't even that magical.

It's just Kenna is legitimately so inspired by becoming a squite.

I promise you won't be disappointed in this.

I'll be the finest squite that ever squited.

It feels right to have a squite.

Yeah,

it feels right to be a squite.

And you all are a good squite.

It's a good night to be a squite.

I love my squite.

A squite has never had finer nights.

She jumps in and gives you guys a big hug.

All right.

All right.

Well, as we're all getting ready for bed,

I'm going to ask everyone to do one last kind of dream embrace with me to try and reach out to swag yeah that'd be great right on yeah you guys all get in a little circle you guys hold hands and uh saul go ahead and give me a wisdom saving through okay

oh yeah that's going to be a 26.

sick there we go uh saul you had i believe two out of the three spores filled in the vial so you fill another one and that would typically be enough for a divination

and as you go into your meditation, you feel like you are doing it correctly.

You feel connected.

You feel this elevated sense of self and your connection to the universe.

But much like Kali when she just tried to reach out to the serpent queen, you don't feel quite like you can get to him right now.

There is this sort of far offness and you realize that swag

His domain is kind of the Beastlands.

Like that's where you go to him.

You get the sense that he is out there.

And in fact, you unfocus your eyes and just take in the sky around you.

And you see all these stars.

And you don't see the like classic galactic swag who like can move around and everything.

But kind of like Callie with the Serpent Queen, you see these far-off stars glittering a little bit brighter that seem to form swag.

Would you like to ask him a question, or would you like to say anything?

I think I'd just say thanks.

I think that I've learned enough to know that knowing the future isn't always helpful, and that I've got everyone here I need to make that future come to pass.

So maybe the only question I ask is:

can we sleep here tonight?

Stars glitter in a way that there almost looks like a little nod.

But to your point before about having everything you need

to

make the future the way you'd like to see it, as you say that, you see the spores in your vial

glitter and take on, it almost becomes like a strange potion.

Like it looks like you have a little galaxy.

in your vial.

Whoa.

And

you don't get the sense that this is something that you should open now, but it's something that you should open in the future.

Okay.

Emergencies only.

Got it.

Wow.

Turndown service is impressive here.

I'll say what I said before.

Thank you for everything.

It was nice getting to know you, and it's nice continuing to know you.

And I'll see you again one day.

You feel a warmth coming from the vial.

I'll have a lot of questions about how to teach children because I'm not good at it.

I don't think you're allowed to call them dumb, number one.

You see the glittering stars not.

All the best teachers break the rules.

Comforted by that fact,

I think I make a little bed on a lily pad

and sleep under the stars.

Invite all my friends to join me.

I'm not taking this cloud cup off.

Tell you what.

It's too damn comfortable.

Yeah, I'm key to these cloud head days.

I'm not changing tomorrow.

I'm taking my cloud cup off, but to use it as a pillow.

Wow.

Yeah.

An absolutely perfect pillow.

Fluff up my cup.

Jesus.

Fluff up my cup.

You guys fluff your cups and go to bed.

And

the next day,

you guys sleep in a little bit to get your long rest.

And also, yeah, let's not set an alarm.

No one's going to be able to get it.

We all have to greet because we're going to be nervous enough or we'll wake up.

Yeah, we'll wake up at a normal time.

I'm sure we'll hear some commotion for sure.

Yeah, you guys wake up and you see that you needed the morning anyway for the airships and stuff to be loaded up.

You see that there are a few dozens of them.

You see green knights, mob goblin, automatons, fire elementals.

As everybody's loading up, getting ready to go, you see honeysuckle and licorice are there on the edge of this cloud.

You see Ma Goblin approaches you guys and holds out like small earpieces and goes,

I'm outfitting all the commanders of the different legions with communication devices.

So, land, air, or sea, whatever front, you should be able to hear each other.

Wow, whoa.

Thank you, Ma.

You are really, really talented.

She gives you a little wink and then goes and walks over and begins outfitting Robert the Young Stag and Garash as well.

And I think as you guys look out, you might see how far you've come.

You are commanders of this army.

You see all these seasoned knights and everybody loading up airships.

And there was a time not too long ago when you were D-Class knights that were wondering if you'd ever get to ride on an airship.

Fuck.

Wow.

That's so cool.

I know I'm cold all the time, but I have the chills.

We've come a long way from sky days, huh?

Yeah, we really have.

I still have that gift card.

Really?

Don't.

Has it expired?

Has it expired?

I have to believe it hasn't hasn't because I need to have something to fight for.

You know what?

You're right.

That's your North Star.

Let's say this.

If any of us die, the other ones have to use the gift card.

Yeah.

Within a month.

Within a month.

Right.

The other ones all go to TGI Sky Days and use the gift card.

Right.

And they have to get absolutely plastered remembering them.

And we have to lie and say it's someone's birthday.

Even though we have a gift card.

And we have to order every single appetizer.

Yeah, even the bad ones.

Yeah, how do you guys want to?

So you guys have, obviously, four of you that are in like your main party.

You see Balnor and the other allies get on airships and whatnot.

You see Albin comes over,

gives Sol a big hug, gives Callie a hug, brushes past Calder.

Oh my God, what if I die?

Albin gives you a cold, limp handshake.

That's more like it.

And then gets onto an airship with a mob goblin.

And how would you guys like to set yourselves up on honeysuckle and licorice?

You've got this great silver serpent and this great bronze serpent.

So there's like a coronation/slash execution happening.

Yeah, yeah.

Execution.

Which is honestly like messy messaging.

Yeah.

The optics are questionable.

She's trying to do it all.

Yeah.

Well, it's kind of, I think it's kind of like spill the blood of our enemies, see the might of the Empire.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, I get it.

I get it.

Someone say, Empire!

Jarvin comes over with a frothy muff.

He goes, Shall we have a drink before we leave?

Really committed.

Jarvin, were we gonna send you in to uh oh no, we will be sending you to your death if we sent you, right?

Never mind.

Keep that cup away from me.

It's the only cup I don't want to be near.

And then takes a sip of piss and then walks away.

And

so near the bridge.

I thought it was frothy.

He's leaning in.

I thought he'd forget about the bitch.

Is that a new thing that he does?

I think he, but he's so frothy.

I'm like, are you peeing from a ladder?

I think if he's drinking piss, he's just pissing piss, and that's why it's so frothy.

Does he show you that?

No, I mean, like, sorry, are you pissing from a ladder?

Like, is that how you're getting it so frothy?

Yeah.

It's like a head of Guinness on that thing.

Sharbin just shakes his head and goes, that's my secret.

You know what?

I'm going to let you eat that.

I am, actually.

We've all got our North Stars.

He looks somberly.

Gets onto a ship and takes off.

How do you guys want to spread out on honeysuckle and licorice?

You see, Foster is there as well.

Oh, yes, Foster.

Yeah, I'm going to scoop Foster under my arm.

And then I think whichever one seems like it has space for me, that...

Both of them are huge.

Yeah.

Which one will give you the best chance to get close to Marigold, do you think?

Licorice is the fastest.

Then I think I'm going to go on Licorice.

I feel like the sooner we can maybe hopefully appeal to Marigold.

I mean, look, maybe this will mean that we just go in there and we get shot out of the sky and it was a bad idea, but it almost feels like if we have a chance to tug at that string and bring it to our side, that seems like a priority to me.

Any other thoughts on that?

No, I think having you super fast, super mobile.

Yeah.

Seems like the best bet.

Would you feel comfortable with that, Saul?

Like making a beeline for Marigold?

I think we beeline and then use what Honeysuckle does best, have him burrow and do the surprise attack, maybe.

You're right.

I'd love that.

Get ahead, and then he burrows underneath, try to get like a little bit of surprise on him, right?

Such a good idea.

Yeah, let's do that.

Om nom nom.

Yeah, little om nom nom.

That's really good.

Yeah, because then we're then because I was thinking we should be separate, and that's a perfect way to do it.

Great, sweet, yeah.

Yeah, you see, um, Kenna hops on back of Honeysuckle with Calder, Callie hops on back of Licorice with Saul, and you all take off as Garash summons a mighty wind and lets out a mighty gust of air.

You are propelled west towards the winter courts.

All right.

I guess we'll know if Garash dies because our cups will vanish.

Oh my god.

Is that true?

Just perish the thought.

Protect him at all costs.

I whispered to everyone in the head piece.

We should probably keep him alive because he's like controlling the wind and making it so we get there on time.

But also the younger.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, a lot of reasons.

That too.

That too.

You guys fly over the landscape, the domain of summer and spring.

You are low enough in the air that you can see your ground and sea troops below.

You are following along the southern coast of the continent.

So you see boats of Charbin's forces, these fire elementals, along with boats of automatons.

Some of them have transformed into vessels themselves so that they can carry the smaller ones.

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.

Oh my goodness, that's cute.

They're just chugging along down there, still like blowing on the wind, so they're going as fast as the airships.

As you reach the center of the continent, where you begin to get into Jovir's domain, you find yourself in a similar location to the Iron Deep Mountains on the Materio Plain.

But here in the Fey Wild, the continent is bisected in the middle, and water divides the two kingdoms.

You can still see the peaks of mountains, but they look like rocky islands sticking out of the water.

In order to secure her domain over the years, Jovir has literally cracked the land and separated it from the summerside.

And on the sea here, you meet up with some friends.

You see a force of merfolk join your numbers in the ocean with the glorious wave mother Acorala leading them.

She is this giant proto-old guppy floating on top of the water.

Come to me, my allies.

You see, she summons more waves, and on them, you see more allies.

You see, Laszlo the dragon turtle shows up

with stone commander Basalt von Schale on his back.

Behind Laszlo are rolling boulders that glide along the surface of the water.

These appear to be clusters of earth elementals.

Sick.

You see, basalt gives you a nod and kind of points their finger up at you guys.

You also see, riding a bunch of jumbo shrimp, are a squad of crustacean knights.

Holy shit.

The Brian Sploojes.

God's what I wouldn't give to be part of that story.

You see, you do see Sir Brian Splooge among them, but you see that there is one lone shrimp knight, taller and more gallant than the rest, pulls

the steers

on the jungle shrimp that he's riding and removes his helm.

You see long blonde hair and a handsome squidward face.

He's almost.

Calder struggles for a camp corner.

I have to get this.

It's big day.

He's almost unrecognizable until you hear him shout out over the water.

Ready to help.

Oh, my son.

Help.

Hey, Mom and Dad.

We've never heard you say that before.

You'll dive down.

I gotta kiss his cheek.

You are a miracle.

He quite literally is.

He's like a week old.

He looks fully like a 27-year-old man.

Just handsome Squidward.

With

old Guppy did not have long blonde hair.

He has luxurious Prince Charming blonde hair with a perfect middle part.

I'm so damn proud of you.

You've grown so much.

You guys fly down to greet Gunk.

You see Sir Brian Splooch is down there with a bunch of other Crustacean knights and goes, yes, we are the Knights of the Prawn Table.

We've had countless adventures of legend on the sea.

So Gunk the Gallant is perhaps the greatest of us all, but we each have a story.

Pitch for campaign four.

We play Knights of the Prawn Table.

Please, Kevin Wayne.

Yes, please.

Yes, perhaps.

Perhaps those stories for end of the time.

Keep it shrimple, you know?

Yeah, you see a bunch of like mollusk and crustacean knights.

You see, like a giant lobster dude is there.

Wow.

Where have you been in the last few days?

Want to show you mom and dad?

I pinch his cheeks.

Ow.

I kiss him on the mouth.

They say it happens so fast, but he feels crazy.

I know.

I fret over him.

I worry over every ring that he has.

Well, if anything happens in battle, I've lived a long and fruitful life.

No.

So mature.

Anyone's making it out of here to you, Gunk?

Yes, I hope so.

If anything happens to you, I am burning this world to the ground.

I just hope we finish this fight before I die of old age.

Sorry, when is that going to happen?

Like calculation-wise?

You see, I will not outlive you.

If you look like you're 27, jumbo shrimp forward.

The lines of the prawn table are short, but we burn with a fiery passion.

Yeah, not this one.

Okay, well, all of you are bound to protect him.

But of course,

we are all bound by our spirit of adventure and the many adventures we have had together.

Many adventures.

And we're going to learn about them in campaign four.

I'm sure you don't know what that means.

I have no idea what you're speaking of.

A thousand-episode campaign.

Yeah, you see,

Gunk joins the other knights of the prawn table as they ride off, joining a Coralil in battle.

God, you think your love can only be so big and then it grows even larger.

I know.

It's crazy seeing your own heart ripped out of your skin walking around with a beautiful blonde hair and a middle puff.

He's got swags hair.

Isn't that weird?

Do we have to destroy the crown?

Like, can't we just give the crown to Gunk?

Go be with Gunk.

You see,

Akoralil holds her staff up and goes, I sense more allies on the water.

You see, she holds her staff up.

Oh yeah, I wipe the tears out of my eyes.

I slap myself across the face really hard to shake my feelings.

You see, she brings a huge wave and on it comes more ships.

You see Ursa and the elves of Suner.

We've been calling you.

Yeah, I know.

That's why I'm here.

Amazing vibes.

Just at the right time.

Yeah, the vibes are up right now.

I think they might dip down, but I'm hoping they come back up at the end.

Me too.

Me too.

That's always the coach.

It's a roller coaster.

It wouldn't be a ride if there weren't ups and downs.

But you see dwarves of Iron Deep in metal submarines and sailboats.

Yes.

You see on the deck of one, Jaina Bronzebeard proudly wearing her armor with a cloak flapping in the wind.

Squite, Kenna.

Look.

Jaina, Jaina.

We lost your squire.

We traded her for a squite.

Kenna stands proudly, and you see Jaina Bronzebeard.

She squats proudly.

Yeah, she's sorry.

She squats proudly.

You see, Jane of Bronzebeard goes, A squite!

That's quite interesting.

I suppose that would mean she's up for knighthood.

I will have to track her progress in the battle to come.

And you see, yeah, she like puts her finger on her chin and she kind of smiles and gives you guys like a friendly nod and looks up at Kenna.

You see, Kenna freezes up and just stares forward, and she goes, Oh my god, how's my arbor look?

Does my arbor look look good?

You look great.

You look good.

Don't squint on us now.

Absolutely gleaming.

And a little bit later, as you travel, you see some giant long ships join the fray.

And on them, you see Frost Giant Rangers of the Ice Knife.

You hear a voice call out to the sky.

Giants have arrived to save the small folk again.

Smalder, Kilde, Kryliope, Petrasaur, and Small Buffar.

What is up, fools?

Honeysuckle, honeysuckle, shit on that boat.

Drop a deuce on that boat.

This is a giant long ship.

You think this thing hasn't seen mammoth shit before?

I salute my brother.

He gives you a like knowing nod and a salute that kind of turns to he's he looks very much like he was like joking out of being scared a little bit.

You see, he takes on like a grim look as soon as he looks away from you guys as he just wades into the water with all of the other giants about to go to war.

Wow.

And as you guys make your way across the sea, day gives way to night and you see glittering stars.

And amongst the glittering stars, eventually you see glittering yellow reflective eyes flying at you as tiny shapes on the horizon get bigger and bigger and bigger until you are beset by dragons.

Multicolored dragons of the living wood with elven rangers on their back, red dragons, blue, green, black, and of course, a white dragon.

You see, Princess Shiverblight rides up next to you guys.

I heard there was some chick here calling herself the queen.

Yeah, yeah, you're gonna need to eat her.

Yeah, I fucking think I will.

I'm feeling a little peckish.

She's trying to do a usurp.

Yeah.

Remember when I 1v1ed the king?

Yeah.

I might have to do that again.

I think you should.

I think you should.

Yeah.

That's who knighted me.

I forgot.

I mean, technically, Calder,

you're kind of like knighted by the serpent Serpent Queen now if you want to switch.

You never forget your first.

Maybe she just squaded you.

Oh.

You might be right about that, squite.

You see, yeah, Princess Shiverblight flies up next to Honeysuckle, gives you a nod.

Solder?

Is that...

Is that me?

Yes.

Of course that's you.

That's your name.

I clumsily salute, drop my sword.

Salute with all your fingers.

You don't salute.

You kneel now because I'm the high queen.

So, yeah.

Right.

I fall down to both my knees.

Yeah.

That's better.

Very good.

You gave me the squite.

Yeah.

Okay, everybody keep going west.

Everyone keep going west.

I always blow it.

You see Big Bev

and Elzor and Igneous ride up next to you guys.

And Big Bev goes, I see you still know how to handle the dragon's ego, huh?

Yeah, kind of.

I'm kind of looking at what she's become.

How is the living one doing?

Oh, it's fine.

We just don't listen to her.

Great.

Yeah, she's just got like a a cool castle.

So it's just kind of, it's like we don't have a queen.

It's pretty freaking sweet.

That's great.

She keeps the High King Duratar's younger brothers kind of at bay.

Yeah.

Kind of fighting each other.

Oh, that's awesome.

Yeah, it's been pretty nice.

That's great.

I'm glad to hear that.

Thank you for coming here to fight.

Well, we owe you a favor, but not only that, I'm kind of selfishly hoping to get these teeth on a whole Sawyer there.

And you see, he clamps his teeth together.

I'm going to need you to eat, Black.

Oh, yeah, I will for sure do that.

Everyone, just, yeah, feel free to eat whoever you want.

Had some appetizers, was able to find the old folks who betrayed us way back when, was able to hunt a bunch of them down.

Wow, you had a gunky venture.

Sawyer got away.

I was going to say, I feel like I see spectacles in your tooth right there.

Yeah, I like to keep them there to remember.

And you see, yeah, Mima is on Big Bev's back, gives you guys a little nod and a wave.

You see, Elzor and Igneus are there.

Elzor, hey guys, I got you you something, Saul.

Whoa, right.

Pulls out, you are going to get them hats.

You see Elzor and Igneous pull out visors and throw them to you guys.

Oh,

this is great.

I did get you hats.

I got you these deck wizard hats from Suner.

Whoa!

Yeah, they're like hats from like your underwater cousins in Suner.

You see Elzor comes over, gives you guys a hug on Dragonback.

Igneous, this deep dragon that has its own like Cyclops-looking visor,

takes the hats, puts them on, and you see Elzor swings their chains around.

They've got like chains that they attack with as they join the other dragons.

It looks like Igneous and Elzor are leading Shroom Rot's old contingency of the deep elves who live outside the caves.

There are a bunch of deep dragons and wormlings with them.

You see the dragons are flying in packs with adult dragons leading the way scattered amongst the airships.

You see that it looks like Big Bev is kind of leading the way, but is pretending like Shiverblight is leading the way to satiate her ego.

Like she'll be riding in a certain way, and Big Bab will be like, Yeah, maybe even like this, though.

The biggest figurehead I've ever seen.

So, you guys now have this giant caravan of all of your allies in the sea,

in the air, strong.

Yeah.

And as you get closer to the shores of the Winter Court, you suddenly see a flash

goes up in the night sky.

It looks like a great rift, like the northern lights, but it glows red.

A shooting streak of crimson in the sky that then spreads out, revealing a projection to the entire planet.

As you look up, you can see Queen Jovere.

She is in her fearsome elder Fae form.

This twisted crown, long hair of thorns, claw-like fingers, giant frame,

and she addresses the realm.

People and beasts of the Fey Wild

Extraplanar interlopers seek to destroy us

Elementals and giants Invaders from the material plane automatons

But I

can protect you

Together We are stronger

You see the image zooms out

and you can now see Castle Winter this fortress of crooked spires and tall walls with cruel mounted weapons.

Dozens of airships and wiverns dot the sky, thousands of knights on the ground.

You see

floating orbs in the air circling around her,

in which you see images of crowds of bloodthirsty people shouting and chanting for Jovir.

These are, it looks like like a two-way projection, projecting out to the common folk and letting them attend the coronation without being on the battlefield.

You see her ground troops are down by the rocky shores where the water hits the land.

Giant Femorians, Eladron Knights with arcane bows.

They're protecting the fortress below.

In the air high above are Dracoliches and Wiverns.

And in between them...

Atop of a mountain is a place called the Altar of Stars.

This is where Queen Jovere makes her decrees.

Callie, you have seen this before.

Tall spires and plinths around her alight with power, runes of astral imagery, like moons and suns and stars.

She is flanked by two Femorian priests in dark robes, and she projects out to the realm.

We will bring justice to all of the outsiders.

But first,

the one who sparked this

chaos.

She gestures down to a lower part of the mountain, halfway between Jovir and the fortress.

There is a giant cavemouth that opens up to a circular platform, and in the middle of the platform is a pit.

Callie, you have seen this pit before.

Those sentenced to die are struck by an executioner, then dropped into a pit the length of this enormous mountain, their bodies lost to the fae dark underneath, likely consumed by some monster.

you see

the projection lowers from jovier and goes down to the platform sir

is bound and brought out by winter court knights you see behind her is an executioner this enormous femorian with muscles that jut out unnaturally from his frame just muscles on muscles He wields a giant hammer and has a fearsome mask.

A circle of knights and a fellow Femorian block the cavernous exit.

And Jovier continues.

Syra Igni,

you tried to divide us,

to lead the people of this realm astray,

but we are united in justice.

You killed my sister.

You brought chaos and ruin to the Seeley court.

What do you have to say to the charges against you, Queen Slayer?

You see, Syra,

her hair extinguished, just flat and red.

She's bound.

She looks like she's been up for several days.

Mechanically, it looks like she has like five levels of exhaustion.

Just

nothing there.

She looks up with glazed eyes, and just with

all of the rebellion she can summon, you see a little spark.

You see her hair goes up for a moment, like a bonfire.

And she just goes you

you did this

her hair flops back down and she almost passes out just from that little summoning of energy you see jovier continues liar

the people saw you and your foul beast rain fire down on my sister

but i have brought your beast to heal You will die by its flame.

You see fire shoots up from the pit,

like some great beast is waiting inside.

And we will unite the Fey Wild anew!

A baptism in the blood of our enemies!

You hear cheers of the crowd, and you see the executioner hit Syrah with the butt of his hammer to shove her forward.

And as this happens,

You see the first little bit of sun begins to peek over the horizon.

Jovier lifts her hands up and removes her crown.

You see, it floats above her head.

One of her Femorian attendants brings over another crown, the one that Syrah had used to steal the power of the Seeley crown, but it looks like it's been decorated like ceremonially, like it has like flowers and stuff wrapped around it, like something more like Cyrilla would wear.

And then you see the unseely crown, this thorny crown with shadows whipping around it, and the new Seeley crown, the wreath of flowers that looks like it sucks up little bits of sunlight and creates something like fireflies around it.

Jovere holds her hands up with the two crowns.

She seems to be whispering some kind of incantation and performing a ritual to bring them together.

It almost looks like she's trying to pull them together telekinetically, and naturally the crowns want to separate.

You see that she is straining to pull them together as their magics reject each other.

But eventually it looks like she's starting to overpower them and they begin inching towards each other.

And as they do, you see the sun and the moon in the sky begin rapidly rising and falling.

You see the waves in the ocean begin to get wild.

You see, Okorla, whoa,

has to use all of her power just to keep it choppy and uneven, just to keep it a normal, terrible storm that would normally destroy ships.

Oh my god.

You hear Jovir yells out, The sun sets on our our enemies, and a new dawn rises for the Fey Wild.

You see Jovir straining, looks down from her ritual to the executioner.

Kill her.

The executioner prepares his hammer.

Garach lets out a mighty gust that sends the whole army forward.

Everybody go ahead and roll initiative.

I really want a good initiative.

Saul, let's actually go directly for that.

I would actually like an A20 this time.

Ah, that's a 17.

19.

13, but you're the one driving.

Here's how this combat is going to work.

You guys are trying to save Marigold, you're trying to save Syrah, you're trying to stop Jovir, but there are also thousands of enemy forces, and your allies are going to have to fight them, or else this is unwinnable.

You'll just be taken over by, attacked by a million Wyverns, and guys will just be shooting ballistas at you and shit.

Just completely not winnable.

There will be one initiative for aerial battle and one for ground troops.

On initiative 15, there will be a contest for aerial warfare and on initiative 5 there will be a contest for ground warfare.

You and the enemy will both roll a d6.

If you win the enemy lines weaken.

If you lose your lines weaken.

The enemies add plus one to their rolls and you add plus zero since they're defending and you're naturally at a disadvantage.

But every time you win a contest their bonus goes down by one.

If it gets to minus two they flee.

The same is true when your allies lose as well.

If your allies get wiped out or flee, like I said, it means that new bad guys will enter the initiative and get involved in the Jovier fight, which is bad news.

Queen Jovier has a bunch of bullshit to pump up her guys, but don't worry because you guys can command your NPC allies to offset this.

Your NPCs have hero points that they can expend during the contests.

You may use each of these heroic actions once, and then they recharge each round on a five or a six.

So, kind of like a dragon's breath.

I will hand out to you guys

what the heroes can do oh so many papes okay oh we've got air heroes and ground heroes in the air you've got mob goblin recharge five and six ma and albin provide magitech cover fire to ground or air troops you can add one to the next roll dragons uh recharge five and six elzor and igneous restrain a line of wiverns with swooping chain hook attacks freeing up big bev and shiver blight to provide air cover for ground troops adding plus two to their next roll.

Garash, recharge five or six.

Garash sends a scattering wind that resets the battlefield.

You may force the enemy to re-roll their die and re-roll yours if you so choose.

Then we've got ground heroes, knights, giants, and automatons.

Oh my, recharge five and six.

The young stag and Gregor rally the ground troops, add plus two to the roll.

So this is kind of like Albin and Ma Goblins, but only for the ground troops.

Gotcha.

They can't support the air.

A Coralil and the Sea Elves.

A Coralil empowers Gunk to smite the ocean, sending a scattering wave onto the shores.

Force the enemy to re-roll their contested die in a ground contest and re-roll yours if you so choose.

We're spamming Gunk.

This is the sea/slash ground version of Garash's ability.

And then finally, perhaps the best ability, Jaina Bronze Beard, recharge 5-6, superior military mind.

Jaina scans the battlefield and plans a counter-attack.

You may swap rolls with the enemy.

As long as you have the hero points to to do it, you can declare as many hero actions as you like before the dice is rolled, but only one after.

So you basically only get one reaction per contest.

So it's basically like contested D6s like Warhammer, and then we have these ways to sort of reroll it.

You fuck with it, yeah.

So she has more straightforward stuff.

Like she has legendary actions that's like she can just give everyone plus one for the round.

But you guys have these utility things that can come in handy.

I would advise you not to be super stingy with them because she has an advantage if it's just flat rolls.

But if you use all of them, there is the possibility that when the next round comes along, you'll roll a one, two, and a three and have no abilities, you know.

Yeah, yeah.

Um, so air heroes will re-roll their abilities to see if they recharge on the air initiative.

Ground heroes will re-roll on the ground initiative.

Awesome.

If you are able to get the enemy to flee, you can start on the ground or air initiative having allies do full attacks.

So Shiver Blight could just like come in and do a breath weapon on on jovir cool or you can have like bare lane attacker or something like that So you can start or you can have like meme oh cast like mass healing word or something like that like you can start calling in allies as like Final Fantasy summons essentially right the opposite happens if your guys flee on each ground and air initiative new minions enter the battlefield so like a d4 of wyverns or something bad that kind of shit and then the rest of it is nor normal sort of combat stuff we are going to use our dragon riding rules that we did with the uh high king which is that while you guys are in place riding your dragons if you are fighting another dragon or another serpent in this case

um you get a three quarters cover so you get plus five to ac and dex while you're in place

certain abilities and stuff might knock you out of the saddle which would give you half cover and at risk of falling off

as we get into initiative, you guys see that the projection ceases in the sky above you because you guys begin approaching Castle Winter very quickly.

You see this mountain.

Jove is atop the mountain, so she's sort of at the midpoint of the battlefield.

You'd need to be able to fly or be on a serpent to get to her.

Above her are Wyverns and Draco Liches, these like skeletal dragons and all of like the flying minions.

And then on the ground, like down in the shore, is the actual castle that has like mangonells and ballistas and all that kind of stuff and minions down there and that is who a coralil and the green knights and whatnot are going to be fighting and gregor and the automatons and whatnot and whenever we get like close enough and we're like about to go into battle i'm uh planning my meteor witch fountain for

and i'm also going to for the first time use

Sacred Weapon.

Whoa.

That's my channel divinity.

So for a minute, my weapon adds a plus five to attack roll.

Yes, if you guys want to do anything, I'll say that Garash does this one last gust with like the last bit of his power.

You guys have essentially a round that is like a dash action of you guys getting there.

Like, you guys see the battlefield is coming into focus.

Callie blesses her weapon.

Does anyone else have anything they'd like to cast on themselves or anything?

Can I cast Hunter's Mark on Jovier?

Fuck yeah, you can.

Yeah, you see.

As you come into view, you see Jovier.

Anything, Saul?

No, I just do a couple push-ups to get a pump going.

You see...

Oh, shit, your pecs are popping.

You see Mob Goblin, the airship, rides up next to you, and Albin shouts out, Saul, do you want a little pick-me-up?

I thought you'd never ask.

He's going to go ahead and cast haste on you.

Yes!

Woo!

Let's fucking go.

Yeah.

Damn, you're doing a lot of push-ups now.

Yeah, you see.

Saul, super fast.

Oh, and I'll activate the patch on Callie to give her the disadvantage on the displacer.

displacer patch.

Okay, okay.

Okay, cool.

So she's got the displacer patch right now.

Nice.

As you guys fly forward at hundreds of miles an hour, wind whipping around you as Garash does this mighty push at initiative 20.

Jovere is making the first of three DC-20 Arcana checks to combine the crown.

She has to use a full action to do it.

You see, she has two Femorian supplicants who are helping her.

You see, they are literally giving her their life force.

They are doubled over with pain as streams of moonlight connect them to their queen.

In the moonlight, you can see quartz of their blood moving from them to Jovir.

You see the sky shakes and trembles as the two crowns move towards each other.

You see the moon and sun begin to move towards each other in the sky.

It's very fucking cataclysmic.

She's going to make a roll with advantage.

The Femorians are helping her.

People are cheering for this.

That is a 29.

You see, she successfully gets one-third of the ritual done, gets them closer.

Okay.

All right, off to a bad start.

After her turn, Saul, that is your turn.

Licorice acts on your turn.

All right, I see this ritual going down.

I was built to interrupt shit.

Yeah!

I'm going to fly Licorice down, just a quicksilver bolt headed right for one of these Formorians.

I'll send Licorice towards one and myself towards the other.

Okay.

I have an ability that lets me get HP when I defeat someone.

So if I see this blood going towards Jovir, and I'm just going to put my mouth in front of it and start gulping it down.

Go ahead.

Okay.

Go ahead and give me...

I'll say a contested.

You can do your wisdom and she'll use her arcana.

Okay.

As you jump in and drink this blood that is being used in this ritual.

We're drinking blood.

We're drinking piss.

I guess functionally I want to like kill this Formorian to interrupt the ritual.

But yeah, I'll do the

slight...

I'll give you Bane or Bless based on if you let it loose.

Okay.

Here we go.

She rolled a natural 20.

Oh, that's cool.

Yeah.

Congratulations.

33.

Oh, my God.

You start to drink this blood that is being used in this insane god ritual, and you immediately start feeling yourself like fade from existence.

You just

disappearing.

It's bad blood.

I thought we had like a really specific mission and now you're just drinking things.

You have Bane for the turn, so you subtract a D4 from the attacks that you make here.

You also have haste.

I do have haste.

Saul, go ahead and give me an insight check as you drink this blood.

Yeah, you see it's flowing up to Jove

as she's trying to combine these crowns.

You don't get the sense.

I will say that.

Actually, give me your insight check.

Okay, insight check.

Ah, that's a 12.

Okay.

You don't get much from the blood other than you know that this is what they're doing to help Jove.

So stopping them will stop the help actions on Jovir and will stop them from protecting her.

You do get the sense, though, that...

These crowns aren't something that you could just go up and grab.

Like you feel like an anti-magic field around them.

There is you being like a level 13 monk who has like perfect control of your body

are still feeling yourself like like almost like thrown back.

There is like a wind here from like a magical rejection.

Wow.

I haven't tasted much blood in my life, but this tastes worse.

So go ahead, make your attacks on the femorian and take away

three from the rolls.

Okay.

As you feel queasy from drinking these guys' poison blood.

It's like Setchuan peppers.

We ate so much freaking cursed stuff for this.

Just eating bones and shit.

Yeah.

Yeah, we just went down to the pit and just ate whatever was in there.

It's real earthy.

Damn.

31.

Okay.

Minus three.

And then 25 minus three.

No sweat.

Hit him.

Okay.

Hit him both times.

That's 28 points of damage.

Cool.

Still looks pretty healthy.

You see more blood pours into the moonlight and goes up.

Don't drink that one.

Yes.

Squeeze me.

Squeeze the blood out.

Oh, no, they like it.

Do you want to do Flurry of Blows or Stunning Strikes or anything?

I'll Flurry of Blows.

Oh, and I'm hasted so I can attack again.

Oh, fuck.

Yeah, you can.

Yeah, you can.

All right, so I believe it's just one extra attack.

Yeah, yeah.

I'll do my extra attack and flurry of blows.

So it's going to be three more attacks.

Yeah, you see, Saul's just a flurry of just like speed bags their face.

Gagging the whole time.

25 minus three.

Hits?

26 minus three.

Hits.

27 minus three.

Damn, dude.

The bane is gone.

You've passed it.

You like pack up a gross blood loopy.

Just too many fingernails in this.

There shouldn't be fingernails in your blood, man.

Mr.

Bufo, why did you drink the blood?

That's, you know what?

When you're a full knight, you'll understand.

All right, yeah.

Ah, that's 37 points of damage.

Sick.

Okay, yeah.

You are beating the shit of this for Morian.

You have him like mounted and you're just pounding into him, but he's just smiling and has this glazed look in his eyes as he holds his arms up to give more blood to Jovir.

Frickin' cold.

But you see, Jovere looks down and she goes, Don't die too fast.

Stop enjoying this.

After Saul's turn, Saul, is there anything else you want to do?

You have Licorice.

Can Licorice act, please?

Yes.

Breathe fire.

Yeah, I'll just breathe fire on this.

On Jove.

I mean, you can get all of them with Licorice.

So sick, yeah.

So, yeah.

So Callie is on the back of Licorice.

Licorice whips around and angles it in a way that it'll hit everyone.

Saul, you jump back, get back onto Licorice so that you're not hit by this.

Callie, can you help me?

Just rub the starlight sacks underneath your neck.

I got you, Licorice.

Okay, Licorice has a very high DC.

They fail.

Yes.

Okay, roll 16d10, my friend.

Do you want to help me with that?

Yeah.

Okay.

One, two,

three.

Oh, my God.

86 damage.

Wow.

Make that

fire damage.

Licorice.

fully fries the one that that Saul was just fighting.

So Saul, you see there's nothing left but like a steaming pile of flesh as the moonlight just begins sucking up the remains.

Oh, it caramelized the blood.

That femorian.

Don't drink that no matter how appetizing it looks.

That femorian can no longer help Jovere at all.

Yeah.

Here is something you see, though.

You see, the other femorian gets lit up by this star fire.

But you see, as the star fire goes to hit Jovere, there's this wall that goes up, and then you see a shockwave that goes through the moonlight connecting her to the other Femorian.

And then he's hit with the Starfighter again, and that Femorian dies.

So Jovir takes zero damage, but both of her supplicants are fucking dead.

Okay.

Okay.

We killed your blood boys.

You will be my blood boy.

It looks at you, Saul.

Ah!

The nickname actually works.

You win.

You can't handle this spicy blood.

Yeah, you can.

You still have more movement and stuff with licorice.

I'm going to give him a pat.

Serpents don't have butts, but I'm going to pat the thing that approximates a butt on a snake

and give him a little key.

Tell him to use step of the wind to get Callie down to her sister and then come back up to give me a little AC coverage.

Sick.

Okay, so flies down with Callie.

Saul, you're up top on this altar of stars.

It's just you and Jovere.

Jovir looks down at you, insignificant little pant,

as she continues concentrating on the two crowns, literally moving the sun and moon closer to each other.

And you see overhead just thousands of wyverns that looks really hard to do it is it'd be annoying if someone tickled you right yes you go to tickle her uh you see licorice comes back up uh sans callie you're able to hop back on licorice and get your cover for now

callie

you are brought down by licorice on to the platform drop me off right in between the executioners yeah so you get down there and you're kind of like even as fast as we we were, were we fast enough?

All this dude had to do was essentially use like a prepared reaction to shove Syra.

So you get close to the platform and you see something strange.

You see chaos.

You see the knights that escorted Syrah out here, a bunch of them are fighting each other and the Femorian executioner is grappled with a large knight.

You see that Syrah is teetering over the edge while another knight holds her with a thorn whip.

You see Ollie, her duck, is trying to pull her back frantically.

But Cyra is out on her feet and falling forward.

Um, okay, can I go to her?

You...

Licorice has his turn, but it is not your turn right now.

Okay, but I have a reaction, right?

Yes.

Featherfall.

Can I cast Featherfall so that she's lighter and easier to thorn whip back?

Yes, so you cast Featherfall.

It stops Cyra's forward momentum.

And the knight knight holding the thorn whip jerks her back from the edge, and you see the knight's helm falls off, revealing Tris 2.

Tris!

I thought you turned your back on Cyra.

You see Syrah is there, like almost unconscious, leaning over the pit.

What the fuck did you say?

I mean, it's so good to see you, Tris.

Yeah, it's so good to see you.

I didn't say anything, but I didn't talk shit about Cyra at all.

And it's true, that's true.

You just told me I was your second best friend.

Yeah.

Triss 2 is holding onto Syrah here.

You see, Zunark is also undercover, is wrestling with the executioner near the edge.

And he looks up and he goes, We were hoping you'd get here before the execution, but we were the contingency plan.

We've got people on the inside.

This is a glorious contingency plan going undercover.

You've done it marvelously.

You see, he's being overpowered and shoved towards the hole.

I'm going to help you.

I'm going to help you.

You see here, two Femorians down here.

One is the Executioner that is currently grappling Zunark.

There is one Femorian that is heading for Trist 2 to like push Cyra in.

And you see that the other Winter Court knights are being fought by other undercover members of the court with no crowns who seem to have infiltrated.

Okay.

But you get there and you see Syrah is leaning over the edge.

She looks like weary and almost like she's looking at you in like a dream or something.

Syrah, it's okay.

Just relax.

We're going to figure it all out.

Marigold is down there and she's not in her right self right now, but we're going to get her right.

Marigold.

Yeah.

She's so close.

You see

the fire licking up.

I want you to be prepared to remind her who she really is.

As Callie comforts Syrah, that is Calder's turn.

Okay.

I guess I'm going to direct Honeysuckle towards

this execution platform.

Okay, if Honeysuckle takes a dash action, then you guys can get to the platform.

Okay, then I'll have Honeysuckle dash.

I want to like have him clip the like the outcropping of rocks.

Oh, just as all the boulders explode, I want to jump off of him

right next to Zunark and turn to Trist 2 and say, Is something happening with you and this guy?

You see, Trist 2 goes like, What?

No.

I mean, we're friends, yeah?

Calter nods and smiles and then realizes he's not sure what she meant by that.

I'm friends with both of you.

Whoa.

Right.

Whoa.

That stings.

Why?

Zunarga's wrestling this guy next to you.

You see, Honeysuckle is actually fucking perfect for this assignment because you guys fly in and there is this giant cavern, right?

So you see that the guys from the court with no crowns crowns are doing a good job fighting the few knights that are escorting Syrah, but there are more people running in from the cavern from like you can assume there's like walkways and stuff inside the mountain so like the cavalry is starting to fucking rush in and honeysuckle can fucking close this down.

He can destroy this like part of the mountain.

Amazing.

I'll say if you want to seal the cavern shut and make it so no more people can come and hit the femorian that was like rushing down to go after triss to kind of push them both in you can hit both of them

oh nice

okay yeah i'm gonna do that and then i'm gonna say this ends here and then like shoot a glance at triss to see if that landed that was yeah go ahead and give me a um performance check with advantage with advantage yeah

God fucking damage oh my god oh no can we say that I gave him a bardic inspiration before this is actually a really bad guy yeah you don't want to use that.

I'll say,

use your luck blade.

Yeah.

Kenna actually is pretty soon in the initiative, so she hasn't used this in a while.

She has a thing that lets you re-roll a saving throw.

She will use that.

That's not a saving throw.

Yeah, it's not a saving throw, but I'm going to let her use it.

Now that she's a squite,

she's going to use it to let you re-roll.

Oh, my God.

That's incredible.

I have minus one, and I rolled a seven and an eight.

Okay.

Let's see what I can get.

Okay, she's going to let you re-roll.

Getting lucky to squite.

It's a a 17.

Okay.

Okay, okay.

We needed the turns into a 16.

Okay, it turns into a 16.

You see, Trist 2, struggling to hang on to Syra as she's like hanging over the edge,

looks over and goes, This ends here.

Did you like write that?

I just thought of it off the cuff.

That's like

the smartest thing I've ever heard.

You're so quick-witted.

Oh my god.

Yeah.

i i

this ends here it really does it really just it has to end here right it just kind of ends here it so perfectly just kind of sums up this situation that we're in it's effective yeah

um can i use my action to um make them kiss each other

you see tris too

starts like leaning towards Calder.

Just like drifting into the space near her.

You see she leans into you, but loosens her grip on the thorn whip and Cyrus starts to fall forward.

Whoa, shit.

Fuck.

You see, my friend.

The sword goes back into the hilt for a second.

Oh, yeah.

But we have to end it first.

But go ahead and roll your damage.

And I'll let you know if the cave collapses.

And I'll let you know what happens to the Femorian.

Incredible.

Honeysuckle does 69 damage.

Yay!

Sometimes.

Nothing sexier than random numbers.

Hey, Randy's right in the name.

You see,

as a bunch of other Femorians and knights are rushing down the cavern, you see Honeysuckle just bores through the entrance and collapses the whole thing, knocks it down.

You see the last Femorian that was running out, that was going to take an attack on Trist 2, is hit with like a giant rock and briefly buried in the debris, but then smashes out.

And goes out and continues to run out.

So you've got two problems here.

You've got one Femorian that is hurt, was just hurt by a honeysuckle, that is charging towards Trist 2.

And then you've got this one wrestling with Zunark.

Zunark looks up and goes, Protect Syrah.

You're right.

Thank you.

Giving me permission to do something I was going to do anyway.

What are we in competition of?

I don't understand.

Hey, we're not in competition anymore.

I run up to the Femorian and I say, I don't think so.

Or not today.

This ends now.

Or this ends here.

The Femorian starts to get past you.

I stab him in the shoulder.

27 to 21 and a 14.

The 14 actually hits.

These are just giant dudes that...

This dude's just shirtless

running at you.

Oh, my God.

Awesome.

Then that is

44 damage.

Okay.

Lois is on death's door, but still alive.

Then I'm going to action surge.

Okay, right on.

This ends now.

This ends now.

It's like every time you say it, it sounds smarter.

32, 15, and a 26.

All three hit.

42 damage.

Yeah.

Calder finished this femoria.

Yeah.

Wow.

I pull the retracted hilt like right up to the back of his neck, and then I call Shard so the ice just explodes through his throat.

And I say,

this ended now.

Oh my God, it's like the past tense.

You just adapt it on the fly.

Saul looks away from Jovere and says, holy shit, he's closing.

Sees you narcissists wrestling.

They're both morons.

Calder, you see, this Fimorian was so like locked into like barreling over Tris 2 and Syrah into the pit that you stab into him.

The momentum of his body continues and his muscles just stop working and his head falls off as he takes his momentum into the pit and just falls off and explodes into the fire.

God, that really ended.

What the fuck?

That was wild.

That dude was fucked up.

Nomorian, no Morian.

Okay, um, after

Calder,

that is Aerial Warfare.

Boo, baby.

Oh, actually, you know what?

Jovere's got to take some legendary actions.

Sure.

So she's going to use one legendary action to pump up one of her

legions by two.

She's going to pump up her aerial legion.

So they now add a plus three.

You look up into the sky and Saul, you are up there on top of Licorice.

You see the Wiverns, the sun and the moonlight is hitting them, creating these shadows.

But then you see the shadows like detach from them and animate as like their own monsters as their numbers are bolstered.

So for this D6, she's going to be adding a plus three is there anything you guys want to do hero points or otherwise um for air yeah do we want to do mob goblin yeah yeah yeah we'll get plus one do mob goblin to get plus one and we've got things to do we've got a reaction you got a reaction in case you need to okay so here's how this works you see as big bev and shiver blight and all of the dragons go in to attack the wiverns and all the shadows start attacking them mob goblin starts trying to mow them down with these laser gatling guns with the airship.

Let's roll D6s.

You get plus one.

I got plus three.

Oh boy.

That's a six.

Yeah.

Let's go.

Okay, so seven total.

Let's see what I roll.

Three.

So we got a six and you got a seven.

Woo!

Yes.

Yeah.

Amazing.

Wow.

Okay.

Wow.

We didn't even have to use Garage.

You guys don't have to do any kind of re-roll shenanigans or anything.

You see, at first, the dragons are beset by these Wiverns.

As they go to attack the first round of them, these shadows go down and start biting their necks.

But you see, Albin and Ma have these devices that dispel magic and stuff, and they just cut through the shadows like butter.

Just start scattering them on the wind.

Jovier's plus two was only for this roll, so that goes away.

The bad guys now go from defending, which is a plus one, to contested, which is a plus zero.

So now they are losing.

They're at plus zero.

Yes.

After aerial warfare that is kenna's turn kenna is with calder yeah i'm gonna try something here ah

magic weapon she is going to run forward and try to tackle the executioner into the pit

wait this is an ability check so she gets to add a d4 to it wow okay she has skill she has athletics plus eight so she actually has better roles than these this guy okay

yeah you can roll the d4 for her okay kenna what are you adding?

Because taking a squite stance.

She gets down in like a football stance.

Just a one, just a stand.

Just a one.

Okay.

That's helpful, though.

Okay, so she's adding.

I will roll for the Femorian first.

Okay.

Femorian gets a 16.

She's trying to beat a 16.

So this will break the grapple on Zunark and knock the guy back to the lip of the edge.

Sick.

She successfully breaks the grapple with Zunark.

There we go.

Squite's might

is worthy of fright.

Super tight.

You see, she literally like gets this guy in like a single leg takedown, like picks him up and starts fireman carrying this fucking giant towards the pit.

And is going to make one more athletics check to try to shove him down.

You see Zunark, who's been wrestling for a while, goes, Jesus Christ, where'd you get this kid?

I rolled a one again.

Okay, one again.

That's fine.

Dirty 20

for the executioner.

And now Kenna has to roll.

She has plus nine to this.

So 11 or higher gets it come on actually cali you want to roll it yeah oh

well if i do her

11.

wait exactly

yeah uh you see yeah

she perfectly just has enough strength to bring him in the edge and almost throw herself off.

You see a giant fire comes up from the serpent within the pit that just completely roasts the Femorian that she tosses in.

and she leans back.

You see, a bunch of her hair is burnt off.

Whoa, that was

really close.

That was

crazy.

That was very close.

Quite close, yeah.

But she manages to get rid of that femorian, that executioner.

Yeah.

After Kenna's turn, that is Calliope's turn.

Okay, so there's no more Femorians here, right?

There are no more Femorians.

I'm going to get Syrah up to safety.

Callie, as you grab the thorn whip, you pull Syrah in.

You see, there is this moment of peace in this insane battle.

The cavern has been collapsed behind you guys.

Zunark is free from having been grappled.

Court with no crowns, knights who have survived, who have infiltrated, finish killing the other knights that are down here.

And honeysuckle has collapsed the cave, so no one else can get up here.

You see war raging in the air.

But in this moment, you see, as you catch Syra and you pull her in, Syrah looks up at you and goes, Clype, you're here.

Yes, yes, I've been trying to get here for as long as you've been gone.

Nobody.

Nobody's ever here.

I'm here now.

I'm here forever.

She looks comforted, but looks in a daze.

I'm gonna cradle her, and it's like, kind of like as the younger sister, it almost feels like a milestone to be able to act like the older sister.

Yeah.

So I want to like almost cradle her and bring her to Tris and say, Tris, can you cast greater restoration on her?

Go ahead and give me a

luck check.

We'll say on an 11 or higher, she has it.

It's a 9, but I'm going to use my luck blade point

to re-roll this one.

Okay.

That's a three.

Oh, hold on.

Okay, okay.

Absolutely brutal.

Okay.

You see Tris 2 goes, sorry, I don't have that.

That's okay.

I can do cure wounds.

I'll just get her and get her feeling better.

Yeah.

Okay.

First, before I go, I want to look down.

Does it seem as though what's happening with Marigold is like a magical charm?

Does it seem like something I could dispel?

Callie,

you're holding Syrah.

You hand her over to Tristu, who gets ready to start healing her up.

You go to

look

into the pit and

Marigold flies out.

You are knocked back by the serpentine scales.

It's just a wall of powerful scales appears.

And

on

a higher initiative, but had hid their initiative until you had gone.

You see...

Oh my god!

On her fucking back!

Stolen fucking valor.

You see

flying out of the pit is Marigold, this enormous gold dragon whose scales glimmer like sparkling stars in the moon and sunlight.

She swims out into the open air.

I'm going to the second I see him, I'm going to face step right behind him.

Okay.

Like riding behind him, going around his waist.

You see, she goes to swim out into the open air.

You see, her eyes are glazed.

There's no sentience there.

But just as you suspected, there is a rider on her back.

An elven ranger in fine green armor with piercing green eyes.

Callie, I'm going to say he's just going to act on your initiative.

So you guys are going to act on the same initiative.

So you

face step.

I face step like romantically with my arms around his waist.

And I'm just like, this doesn't belong to you.

So you face step on his back.

He is prepared.

You see, as soon as you arrive there, he flips back and faces you face to face, riding on it backwards.

And he goes, Calliope.

You should keep your eyes on the road.

You seem pretty new at driving this thing.

Don't worry, she's very well behaved.

She takes our guidance.

No, she's manipulated.

You've charmed her.

Don't think that it has anything to do with your training, it has to do with your bewitching.

Calliope, I don't have the power to charm anyone.

Not like that, but

I kind of.

I attack him.

Go ahead and

make your attack on him.

And I am like, I'm glowing with moonlight.

So I like really want to focus on that because I know that she's trying to use moonlight.

So I'm trying to use it myself.

You see,

as you go to do a smite and use moonlight, you do see it's like flickering, almost like using too much electricity or something.

There's like moonlight being pulled away from her.

19 on the first attack.

19 would hit.

He's going to use a reaction to parry.

You see he very quickly gets a dagger up that blocks it.

You recognize this as the one that cut your hair.

Oh, you must be fast friends by now.

I hit him again.

24.

24 does hit.

Yes, okay.

So yeah, so you swing around and you go to hit him and you see that he has been outfitted in like this pristine green armor.

Like he's gotten an upgrade even since he has joined the green knights.

I'm going to do a Bardic Flourish as well as a fourth level Smite.

Just so fucking pissed off.

Calder, you just hear the clanging of steel as they fly up into the air.

That's going to end bad.

Was that fucking Glenn?

Yeah.

So you just see Glenn.

Kenny yells, yeah.

Ah, shit.

Oh my god, I rolled so poorly.

I rolled four ones.

That is horrendous.

I guess you don't want to hurt me, Calliope.

No, it's that I've been so excited for this moment that now I'm nervous that it won't live up to all the times I've dreamed of doing this.

Oh, you dream of me, Calliope.

Of course I do.

You don't dream of me?

Oh, I do.

I thought so.

32 damage.

Oh, can I use my helm, uh, a reaction to command an ally to take an attack?

Yes, you can.

She would have to use her reaction.

Okay, so

you do want to do that?

Okay.

Nice.

So you'll get an extra two more attacks.

Jesus.

Really?

Yeah, but you'll have no reaction for the round.

Okay.

Okay.

The way I do it is just by yelling, Galli, this guy sucks, right?

Absolutely.

31 to hit.

Okay, hits.

Go ahead and do your last attack as well.

Yeah.

And 27 to hit.

Two more hits.

Okay.

Yeah.

Doing two more smites.

89 damage.

Damn.

Thank you, Golda.

Okay.

Wow.

Glenn looks supremely fucked up.

Yeah.

Good.

But after you stab into him, he pushes off of you and does a back roll and steps back.

Pulls out his bow and gets ready to take an attack on you.

The first thing he's going to do is use a bonus action.

Pull out a supreme healing potion.

And he's going to

roll.

Gets back 43 HP.

Oh, God.

He looks heartened and strengthened by having just done that.

And he's going to take three lightning quick arrow shots at you from across the table.

Let me know the first time one hits.

And also, I've got Soul's Blessing.

Yeah, the Displacer Patch.

Oh, you do.

Okay, yeah.

So disadvantage.

Disadvantage on the first attack.

What is your AC?

My AC right now, I only got a one on my Bardick, so it's a 20.

Okay.

21 with disadvantage?

Yeah, that hits.

Okay.

You see, as this

arrow flies forward, it suddenly has like tendrilly shadows around it as it strikes into you and you feel

something eating at your mind, like some kind of poison or something.

Go ahead and give me a wisdom-saving throw.

Okay.

Oh, that's really good.

23.

That passes.

So you take 14 damage from the arrow, then you take 11 psychic damage from the effect, but the effect doesn't fully take place.

This was a shadow arrow, and it would have made it so you can only see five feet in front of you.

So for a moment,

for a moment, this hits you, and the entire world goes out of focus, except for your feet in front of you.

Well, this is very poetic because of my fount of moonlight spell.

Anyone who hits me has to make a constitution-saving throw, and if it's failed, then it has the blinded condition oh shit my next turn okay tit for tad so really beautiful stuff

passes uh so hits you but you are able to block the effect you hit him back with the magic but he's able to block the effect flips back you see calliope we make each other better who would have thought a little crick elf could be here a little eladron And what are you here?

You're just another pawn.

Just another pawn?

I'm riding a great serpent in the High Queen's army.

You are riding a great serpent who has like training wheels on.

Congratulations, your mommy charmed the fancy beast and now you're riding it.

That's so impressive.

Talk to me when you've actually mastered the beast yourself.

Called her whistles.

True, perhaps I didn't tame the serpent myself,

but I did tame the beastlands.

There's you.

Isn't that just as good?

How did that feel good for you?

What was your gripe against that?

A little elf from a backwater village to kill an archfey?

Oh my god, do you think you're an underdog in this story?

Of

course.

Your little underdog who just went to the beastlands who weren't bothering you at all and killed someone big so you could feel bigger?

He points at you and he goes, Yes, Calliope,

that is a rivalry.

We make each other better.

Stronger with everyone we defeat.

Rivalry?

That's your purpose in this world?

You took away my purpose.

I wanted to be the P-Paw.

This is my revenge.

This is my purpose.

Yes.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, you chose revenge.

I almost did that too.

So I get it.

It's very enticing.

Well,

thank God you didn't choose revenge.

He's going to take two more shots at you.

26 to hit on the second one.

Hits.

29 to hit on the third one.

Can't enchant any more arrows,

but does do 19 damage and then 22 damage.

Oh my god.

Okay, let me see if I keep my concentration.

Oh, yes, I do.

Nope, that's an at one.

I dropped my spell.

Yikes.

Oh, fuck.

That's awesome.

So,

hits you in the shoulder.

Well,

you're gonna you're finding out now, Murph.

I took the tough feet when we leveled up

so

good for you

happy to have all those extra

you have this grit and strength that you didn't have before uh and now in this moment you kind of grit your teeth as the third arrow hits you in like what would have in the past been like a fatal hit i rip the arrow out of my chest and i just say the clipe you faced off before was weaker.

I'm banking on it.

Trisp, just promise me we won't end up like that.

Well, like, what?

I can't see anything.

You can't hear that.

You see, Glenn is then going to

run

around

the serpent and get on, like, her underside.

Looks like he has spider climb or something like that set.

So he is literally, like, hanging upside down on the serpent.

Fuck.

Then that is Marigold's turn.

Clipe.

You watch helplessly

as Marigold flies up.

What a good distraction he's made.

I forgot to even try to dispel her charm.

God.

Damn it, I never learned.

I always just worm my way into your thoughts, don't I?

You do.

Even now, I feel like I'd still hook up with you.

We simply have to hand it to him.

Saul,

you are on top of licorice.

You suddenly see Marigold

comes between you guys and Jovere, this enormous gold serpent that dwarfs Licorice.

And she's got these glazed eyes as she unleashes fire breath on you and Licorice.

Go ahead and give me dexterity-saving throws.

In addition to all of the stuff you have, you have plus five.

Callie, did you kick Glenn off?

Um, no.

I did exactly what I set out not to do, which is I sought revenge rather than devotion to marigold.

So sometimes it benefits you to learn to listen to yourself.

I turn to Jovier and say, once my friends figure out their romantic lives and get them untangled, you are toast.

I don't know what's going on.

You're going through some stuff.

Okay, dexterity save?

Yeah.

24.

Just saves.

Oh, boy.

Go ahead and roll for licorice.

Okay.

That's an 11.

I'm going to use my first legendary resistance.

Okay.

So still takes half.

So licorice is going to take 40, though, as Marigold rains fire down on Licorice.

Marigold, that's your sibling.

Licorice hisses.

Licorice hisses and gets ready to fight.

That's okay.

You guys can fight each other.

Jove is going to take a legendary action and

shoot a

moonbolt at Licorice.

Whoa.

What?

Trying to kill your damn serpents, guys.

26 to hit Licorice?

Yes, that hits.

Okay, 24 damage.

Quit blasting my worm.

She's then going to add two to the ground troops down here.

So they have plus three.

As we go all the way down to ground warfare.

Ground town.

Oh shit.

At initiative five, you see a Coralil summons a mighty wave that crashes the ships of the caravan into the shores as warriors come pouring out.

Gregor and the Frost Giants clear the way with swinging club and axe attacks, knocking back enemy knights.

Jaina Bronzebeard and the dwarves run alongside Bear Lane and the Automatons as they charge onto the battlefield.

Above them are low-flying airships of Green Knights.

Cannon fire rains down on the castle while troops begin feather falling out, engaging the false green knights, Leonor and his troops on a higher ledge of the battle.

You see the two troops of green knights go at it.

For ground heroes, we've got knights, giants, and automatons.

Oh, my, that's adding plus two to the ground troops.

Uh, you have a Coralil and the Sea Elves that will let you scatter and make them re-roll the die.

And you have Jane of Bronzebeard that will potentially, as like a reaction, let you swap dice with the enemy.

I think, yeah, we probably just want to use knights, giants, and automatons and then

see what happens.

Okay, so plus two verse plus three.

You see, as the young stag and Balnor and their troops engage with the false green knights, cries go up for Queen Cyrilla.

A Coralil sends like scattering waves that bring the troops so high onto the shore that they're actually behind some of the knights that were like anticipating them.

Are the knights like surfing onto the shore?

They're essentially like flying up there.

Yeah, gun.

Well done.

Gung.

Look at the other shrimp knights beach, get onto the shore with their shrimps and begin swinging down.

Go ahead and roll.

Let's roll competing D6s.

Okay.

Yeah, I'll roll it this time.

Okay.

What could go rolling?

Some beer got a five of eight.

Okay, okay.

That's a six.

Woo!

Okay, oh no, now we're tied.

Yes, we're tied.

Oh, okay, okay.

So, we can make that, let's make them re-roll.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

If you use the re-roll, there is a great chance you'll win, but she could roll a five.

You she could roll a six.

That's the only danger is if she rolls a six.

Yeah, but it's gunk that's going to force her to re-roll.

I feel like we have to have to.

We have to bet on gunk.

Okay, we have to bet on gunk.

You guys want her to re-roll it?

Right, fourth son.

Okay, so you guys have a total of an eight.

She adds plus three to this.

I'm putting five ties it.

Yeah.

A six beats it.

You see Acoral and the sea elves, Ursia and the other Octo Magi power like plant life in the ocean.

You see like rich like coral reef and stuff under the water like comes a light.

And you see Gunk dips his sword in the water, holds it up.

It is shining bright.

And he goes, Ready to smite

smites into the water and makes her re-roll as it scatters the lines of enemies.

Let's say if they scatter into a worse or better position.

Get gunk.

Yes!

Get gunked!

Always bet on gunk!

Always bet on gunk.

Okay, so you guys used two hero points on that one.

We'll have to roll to see if you can get anything back.

But you see, smites the water, causes this huge wave that wipes out a bunch of knights on the shore, making a clear line for the giants and dwarves to get through.

That's my boy.

The shore is now contested.

They are no longer in a superior defensive position, so they will now get plus zero to their rolls.

Hell yeah.

After ground warfare, that is back to the top of the order.

That is Queen Jove's turn.

Queen Jove is now rolling checks flat.

She does not have her Formorian supplicants anymore, but she has very high Arcana.

She manages to successfully continue the ritual.

You see that with one more push of magic, she is going to be able to combine these crowns.

You see the sun and the moon in the sky begin to.

It's like a half eclipse right now.

They begin to like come together.

Don't do that.

It's fine.

I can control it.

I can control it.

Clearly, that's a bad idea.

It doesn't feel fine.

After Queen Jovere's turn, Saul, that is your turn.

Okay.

Very funny to watch this like grand eldritch wizard casting this ritual.

and I'm just I'm just gonna punch her in the belly button.

Sure, yeah.

Yeah, let's go for it.

Are you doing anything?

So Licorice is engaged right now with Marigold.

Right.

So let me know how you're using movement, if you're jumping off.

If Licorice is engaging Marigold, can I point out Glenn to Licorice?

Licorice, this man has hurt mommy very much.

Wait, I thought this was between you and I.

Yeah, you know what i thought let's dance forever the bards will sing of our coupling i thought about it you said we brought out the best in each other and for a moment i was a bit seduced by that but no you actually bring out the worst in me and then you get off of that That's how this has always worked.

No, no, Calliope.

Let's be rational here.

I can't.

Let's be rational.

You should be devoted to you.

This is a war.

And you've dragged me down

into a place of vengeance and hatred.

And that's what I came here not to do.

We make each other better, Calliope.

We make each other stronger.

You remember that scared girl who came to me in the living wood?

Yeah, and it was I.

I was a schemer and a dreamer living there.

And look where we are now.

We're battling for the fate of the Fey Wild.

Isn't that fantastic?

Everything that you see now before you is in spite of you.

I had to run away from you to get everything I have now.

Licorice, fucking kill him.

Oh, wait.

No, no, no, no.

This is not.

No, no, no, no, no.

Glenn Glenn was straight up not expecting this.

He doesn't have enough H.

He might be able to defend himself enough.

Go ahead, and if you'd like to make attacks on Glenn.

You don't have to if you don't want to.

No, it's so funny.

You can.

Okay.

I don't want it either.

Here's what I'm going to say for Glenn.

Glenn is using some shenanigans to hang upside down.

Right.

I'm going to say that's going to not give him the extra plus five AC, but it'll give him plus two.

Okay.

So he's got a 21 AC right now.

Oh my God.

And I will tell you, he has.

I'm not going to tell you how much life he has.

He has his hand on another potion.

I like how much you didn't expect this and are so delighted.

You're not going to be able to do that.

No, no, no.

This is not.

Calliope, we are endgame.

No.

You and I.

Here's the thing: this isn't about me taking you out.

This is about you being gone so I can do the thing I actually came here to do.

Because you are just a poison and you always have been.

I am a sweet poison.

That's what I'm saying.

Yes, even you, you just called yourself a sweet

poison.

Licorice, you look hungry.

It's over.

It's over, man.

Licorice, can I tell you?

Can I tell you, licorice?

He's delicious.

Yeah, this guy wants some sweet poison.

Jesus Christ.

Okay, first off, see if he re-rolls his breath.

Okay, yeah, I was going to say.

I'm rolling step.

That's a sick.

Okay, here's the deal, though.

If you do the breath, you will hit marigold.

But you might have to do...

So, full transparency.

The way you're going to get Marigold out of this is you do have to burn her legendary resistances to some extent.

If you try to get rid of the charm with like a dispel magic or something, she's going to resist that.

So you do have to do something to her.

I think you got to let the siblings fight.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You do see licorice.

Yeah.

Isn't fully calculating.

This is just like,

just two cats rolling around going after each other.

Knock some sense into your sibling.

Do it.

Okay.

Do it.

He rolls a deck save.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

No constitution.

Oh.

Is he good at that?

Is he good at that, Merrill?

He physically, he needs to roll a natural 20.

Okay, I'll roll this right in front of

Emily.

Jesus Christ.

That's a full.

Oh, actually, dragon riding shenanigans.

Okay.

Is he riding though right now?

He is riding.

So he has quarter cover.

So he's like half off.

He's only going to take half damage if his mount saves.

Okay.

So Marigold is going to roll a con saving throw.

She's got pretty good con.

She might just pass it on her own.

Uh, she passes.

So she's gonna take half.

And he'll take half damage as well.

And he will take half damage as well, but that straight up might be enough to kill a lot.

Still so much damage.

Yep, licorice.

You see him?

He's hiding behind the horn right there.

Just rides up on him.

What?

No.

Toast that guy.

Okay.

64 from my rolls.

I got a 34.

Oh my god.

So that's 98.

98.

Holy shit.

Licorice, finish Glenn.

This is a battle to top serpents, a final act of love and hate and revenge.

No, you were just always a distraction.

You were never worth my time.

I feed you to my mounts.

You see,

Glenn has, for the first time ever, has no response, no honeyed words.

Licorice breathes his star-fire breath onto Marigold and onto Glenn.

All that is left is his perfect pristine armor steaming and smoldered.

Glenn is fucking dead.

Just killed by her.

Oh, wow.

No, pretty poetic.

Yeah, that is the serpent that he stole.

Yeah.

Callie, Saul, you watch as the serpent, the first serpent that Glenn manipulated, that he trapped with a magical device, ends up being his undoing.

The grown-up Licorice destroys Glenn Fear Gladewyn, aka Sawyer.

All your playthings are coming back to haunt you.

Yeah, you see Glenn's smoldering corpse falls off the back of Marigold,

and you see Roasted Glenn falls down.

You see Big Bev

swoops down, chomps him, and keeps flying.

Glenn is gone.

Saul, you may take the rest of your turn.

Has Licorice used his movement?

Licorice has not used his movement.

All right.

So I guess I will, yeah, I'll just have Licorice do a flyby on Jove.

If you do that, he will take an opportunity attack from Marigold.

I'm going to use Step of the Wind to

disengage.

You have Licorice break away from Marigold and begin flying in like a torpedo towards Queen Jove.

At the last moment, as I'm approaching, I unfortunately get an idea from Glenn.

God damn him.

And I use my monk ability to run on the underside of the snake, and I'm going to punch her low.

Oh, hell yeah.

So this is going to be with haste, which I'm still hasted, I think.

Yep.

I like, oh my god, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Unless Albin goes down.

So if the air battle goes bad, he might lose concentration.

That makes sense.

Yeah.

But right now, you guys are tied up in the air battle.

Plus zero, plus zero.

Yeah, I still feel him.

I still feel my heart beating really fast.

Yeah.

I think about a real spooky toilet, and it makes my heart beat really fast.

Yeah, you think back, I think there's a banshee in the urinals, frog pal.

We gotta investigate.

A poison urinal cake.

There's two actors smoking a cigarette.

Oh shit, we're on.

Yeah, in a different room.

They're just traveling through the vents.

We keep talking about hitting up happy hour after work.

What do you think that means?

I don't know.

I'm going to pee while we're here.

Is that okay?

Sure.

Okay, so that's a 13, a 17, a 15, a dirty 20, and a natural 20.

Wow.

Okay.

Only the dirty 20 and the natural 20 hit.

Okay.

She has 19 AC.

Okay, let me try and re-roll one of these.

Oh, yeah.

You want to do a D4?

Yeah, I'll do a D4 on the

D5.

And big in your fist.

You see that?

Yeah.

She is the size of a giant and seems to be kind of like growing as this ritual goes on.

So you're just in her midsection, just trying to get her to break concentration.

What are you doing down there?

I'm just hammering your lats.

That's all I know how to do.

Ah, okay.

Oh, four.

Hell yeah.

21 hits.

Okay, so that's three hits.

Three hits.

Nice.

Beautiful.

41 points of damage.

Nice.

She is like fully concentrating, fully kind of prone, like holding her hands up.

And you go, you punch her in the ribs three times and you feel all this like magical resistance.

You throw the same exact punch in the same exact place three times in the row.

Just oh, oh, oh.

And you finally feel it start to crack, and you see she starts to grimace

as she takes this damage.

Please stop this.

I'm absolutely not going to do that.

After Saul's turn, Jovir is very pissed off at you.

She is going to spend two legendary actions.

You see shadowy tendrils start to appear out of a void in a circle around you and licorice.

This is circle of death.

Go ahead and give me constitution saving throws.

You and licorice.

Okay.

I wish I had counter spell.

Because of my diamond soul ability, my constitution is now plus eight.

Woo!

You do have a diamond soul.

You see, I have diamond abs and a diamond soul.

We've never talked about it.

You wear so much diamond jewelry.

You're always glittering.

It's gaudy.

You shut up.

I got this in sooner and we just never talked about it.

We never talked about it, but you are blinged out.

I love the studs on the studs.

Yeah, you got new piercings to add more studs.

Would you roll your goddamn constitution save me through?

22 versus Saul.

Saul passes.

Shout out to the two crew.

No.

No.

Do you want Licorice to use another legendary?

Yes.

Okay.

Okay, so you and Licorice both take half, which is going to be 19 damage.

Oh, okay.

Both you guys take 19 damage.

Okay.

After.

That's really good.

Where does that shout out?

God damn it.

After the legendary action, that goes back down to Calder.

Okay.

You see, Trist 2 looks up and goes, I can watch after Cyra.

Okay.

She should probably think that I'm the one who saved her.

Totally.

And I'll tell her that story till I die.

I'm going to go see if I can help Cyra's sister and get this serpent in the fight.

Trist 2 nods.

You see Zunark looks at Honeysuckle a little bit intimidated and goes, I think I might do my fighting down there and points to the fight on the ground and starts getting ready to like hurl boulders down onto the castle.

Okay.

My man.

You do you.

Gives you a predator handshake and then begins helping out the ground troops down there.

All right.

I'm going to direct honeysuckle towards the fight, stare longingly at Trist 2 on my way out

and come up in and join the sibling fight.

Sweet.

Sibling serpent.

The three serpents tangle in the air.

It is a renaissance painting.

At least one I'd like to see.

Yeah, and Callie is on marigold now.

Wow.

Dare I say it?

Sexually charged?

This is like a prophecy.

There is like a collection of starfire around you guys, like kind of pulling away from the crazy weather stuff that's happening right now.

It's a serpent cyclone.

Yeah.

Yeah, I whisper into the headpiece, I forgot to tell you guys,

the serpent queen, I think she's still alive and she's watching this.

So this moment, this moment matters.

this is their recital yes exactly that's what i was trying to say is that this is a recital everyone bring the best get your diamonds out yeah let's dance i'm gonna see if honeysuckle gets his um earthquake back uh earthquake back nice that's a five damn he does

yeah let's let's shake some ground right by jovier yeah okay

i was hoping that you would say that okay so awesome you fly around there's this brief moment of like clashing with marigold and joining licorice, but then Honeysuckle burrows into the altar of stars.

And you see, Jovir looks concerned as this happens.

And this starts to actually rattle and like affect her concentration on the ritual.

It's a DC 23 dexterity save.

She fails.

Yes.

Yes.

And is going to, she'll burn a legendary resistance to take half and not have to half is still going to be pretty decent go prone or anything.

Yeah.

We are rocking out that 74 damage whoa

okay and i did cast hunter's mark on her before we arrived so i'm gonna take my three attacks

as honeysuckle dives into the ground and shakes the earth uh and cracks it all around her she takes all this damage and then you burst out with honeysuckle like hanging out of his maw and do a flyby swinging in on jovir oh thank christ they're finally here drive-by icing uh that's an 18 a 19 a 27.

18 does not hit.

The other ones do.

Okay.

And I'm going to use the helm of Ultras to add to D12.

Okay.

Yes.

So that is going to get rid of the second charge on it because you used it once when Callie was fighting Glenn.

That's right.

In what he thought was a duel.

We're going to bested by the machinations he set into action.

53 damage.

Nice.

Yeah.

Jovir is still looking inhuman and like godlike, but you are doing damage.

The guys that were protecting her have been killed.

So, Calder, as you slash into her, at first you're like, God, she's got skin as hard as diamonds.

She's got skin as hard as

Saul.

Yeah, as Saul's absolute.

But she says duck tea, by the way, because I ran out of money.

Yeah.

That's the unfinished.

Yes.

But like you're taking a pick to a rock, you are chipping away and you see you're starting to break at the skin and you see she starts bleeding.

Saul, check it out.

More blood.

She is going to bolster her air troops.

Use her last legendary action to give them plus two.

After Calder's turn, that is Marigold's turn.

Marigold is going to roll to see if she gets her breath weapon back.

Let's see if I can get some of the magic D6s that you guys have gotten.

Nah.

One.

Jesus Christ.

There we go.

Yeah, Aztora and the dice said

we don't for Thirst to Peace.

She's just going to take, she's going to take three cracks at Licorice.

so you see it's super disturbing does like a tail attack and a claw attack and tries to bite at his neck 25 to hit with the tail attacks okay uh goes for a claw attack way more than that on a claw attack slashes against him bites him gets a 31 to hit on the bite uh so does 54 damage total to licorice uh just claws into him licorice shrieks uh she hits him with his tail just like bullying her little brother, essentially, and then bites at Licorice's neck and is like hanging onto his neck.

And Licorice, you see, is like wide-eyed and looking kind of scared.

Be nice.

After Marigold's turn, that is Aerial Warfare.

First things first, let's roll to see if Mob Goblin gets any of their stuff back.

That's a sick.

God damn it.

Why is all my stuff not recharging?

All of your stuff recharges.

The dice devil has come.

666.

If it makes you feel any better on damage i've rolled more ones than i ever yes yes yes yes okay that equalizes it okay it does so she has a plus two now not a plus three because they're adding plus zero it is contested you look up in the air and it is just a mess of wiverns and dragons fighting each other d6 plus two versus d6 plus zero unless you guys want to do anything let's do mob goblin and then we'll potentially do garage if you want yeah yeah let's do dragons too because then we can add two to the ground for their next point.

Oh, to the ground.

Yeah.

So we will do that as well.

Okay.

So yes, the way that works is you guys are going to spend one hero point.

So Mob Goblin, once again, is going to provide Magitech cover.

Starts firing into the shadowy Wyverns that Jove has animated.

Then you are going to use the dragons for their hero point.

Elzor and Igneous, you see, swings out a chain like a lasso over their head, catches a wivern, and then pulls a line of them together.

So they're crashing into each other.

And this frees up Big Bev and Shiver Blight.

They dive bomb down onto the enemy ground troops, and they're going to add plus two to the ground troops' next roll.

So they start breathing acid breath and cold breath down there.

So you guys have plus one to this roll, and then your ground troops have been supported.

Okay.

Jake, I think it's your turn.

Yeah, you want to roll a d6?

Yes, I would love to.

I will roll mine.

Okay.

That's a five, seven total.

Oh, I only got a three.

But we can

garage.

Okay.

Let's do it.

Force the anime to re-roll.

And then do you want to re-roll your own die or do you want to keep the three?

I think I have to roll because I have to get higher than a three if we're going to be in this, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We roll sixes here, Jake.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay.

I will roll for Jove right now.

Come on, come on, come on, come on.

Okay.

Two.

I got another three.

That's okay.

Okay.

But now we're tied.

You guys tie.

Okay.

Battle stays contested.

Nice.

Battle stays contested.

I'll take it.

I'll take it.

You guys have lost three

air hero points.

So you're going to need to roll to recharge every air hero thing that you have.

But the dragons are providing air cover for the ground heroes.

So you might have big wins on the ground here, which might mean key NPCs might come into play.

It's all about the ground game.

You see, Jovir

snarls.

She's at initiative 15 out of

legendary actions.

Okay.

After Aerial Warfare, that is Kenna's turn.

Kenna looks to see if any of you guys are hurting.

I'm okay.

I am quite a lot, but I'm also so much stronger, so I'm actually feeling good.

Okay, but I know that I'm a squite now, but I still don't think I'm going to do that much damage.

You guys like it.

Yeah.

Attack Jovier.

Okay.

You see, Kenna,

yeah, she's on the back of

honeysuckle, right?

Okay.

Yeah.

So she's right up there in the mix.

She's going to take two attacks on Jove.

Everyone should do it at least once.

Misses twice.

Flanks off.

Okay.

A squite.

You know what?

You're right.

Satanite.

You're right.

We'll wait for Jaina for you to become a knight.

You don't think she saw that, do you?

Nope, she didn't.

She didn't.

I was standing in the way.

She did.

She just saw you take a swing.

And that's all that.

Yeah, you didn't squite hit.

She'll give bonus action, help action to, let's see, Calder does a lot of damage and stuff.

She'll give give help to Calder?

Okay.

That is Calliope's turn.

Calliope, you are a top marigold who is like bucking wildly and has licorice's like throat in her mouth.

I know, I know.

Can I try to tap into sort of like the starry constellation that we've devoted ourselves to?

And I want to like wriggle up to where I think that her

little ears are.

And I want to like hum a sweet little lullaby.

Okay.

You feel even as you're hanging on to her and even as she's charmed she's like bucking around and attacking licorice

she's not trying to get rid of you like she didn't attack you yeah so it is this strange thing of like she's charmed but your bond is like a a little bit deeper than that and it doesn't seem like she's gonna go after you okay i'm just gonna lean into her ear and just say your mom sent me these are your brothers and she wanted you to be reunited with your family and Cyra's down there and we're all here and we're going to be on the other side of whatever's happened to you.

What spell would you like to cast with that?

Cast a spell magic.

Okay, Callie, this is a dominate monster spell.

So it is an eighth level spell.

It is a DC18 to break.

I will let you roll either...

Your

spell casting thing or her wisdom saving throw.

What's her wisdom?

Plus 10.

My spell attack is 10, so we'll just go.

So the same?

Eight on the die exactly.

So that's eight.

So that's it.

That's it.

Exactly.

Whoa.

Legendary resistance burned off.

She's only got two left.

Okay, okay.

Okay, so making progress.

While you're speaking, as long as you're speaking, her eyes go clear-eyed and she lets up on licorice, but then her eyes go glazed again and she begins attacking.

But you do see that you are getting getting through to her.

Okay, and then I'm going to look at Sol, and I'm going to give him a bodic inspiration.

Okay, hell yeah.

That is ground warfare.

So, this is now you guys have advantage in this one, and you have some hero points to use if anything goes wrong.

True, we already have a plus two.

You guys did use a Coralil, and you used ground troops, the rallying.

Oh, right.

Let's find out if anyone recharges.

See, so let's start with Young Stag and Gregor.

That's a one.

That's a one.

Does not recharge.

Let's see, a Coralil.

Does a coralil recharge?

I'll roll it.

That's a five.

Five recharges.

Yes.

Okay.

So a Coralil is in play, and Jane of Bronzebeard is still in play.

And you guys have plus two

because the dragons from the aerial combat have swooped down and provided ground cover.

They add plus zero to this.

You guys add plus two.

Jake, you're up.

Me.

Okay.

Yeah.

All right.

Two.

That's a four.

Four.

So six.

He doesn't even need to do anything.

They go from contested to compromised.

They now have a negative one.

As you see,

the green knights fully like take out the false green knights.

Like the young stag battles Leonor in a one-on-one fight and defeats him.

Glenn style kicks him off the edge of the cliff.

Can't wait to hear songs about that one.

You see him and Balnor rally the rest of the troops and keep they're like breaking down the gates to Castle Winter as they continue to fight.

The automatons are up there.

You see Trash Can and Bear Lane are back to back, just swinging and destroying the tiny Eladron.

It's so beautiful.

What's Charbin doing?

Charbin is at the back, commanding his fire elementals to attack.

He's sitting down.

Yes, well, I have to plan, don't I?

He's taking a phone call about sponsorship.

Yes, what do you think about like peace energy drinks?

I forgot to use my free action to assign the displacer patch.

I'm going to give that to Calder this time.

Ken, okay thank you thanks dude after you apply the displacer scarf to calder calder phases in and out of existence jovier

is going to try to finish the ritual and see if she can combine the crowns

she gets a 21 which is enough to finish the ritual could i cast silvery barbs you could okay

i would like to do that all right you cast silvery barbs yeah

uh i'll they're diamond barbs

I'll roll this in front of the table.

She needs to get a seven or higher on this.

If she doesn't get a seven or higher, you guys are going to get to go ham on her for another round while she still tries to finish this ritual.

Seven or higher on this roll, rolling it in front of the table.

That's a 14.

That's a 14.

Okay.

Okay.

It was a good try, though.

It really was.

It was.

You see, Queen Jove is telekinetically pulling the crowns together as they get closer and closer.

When they finally are barely touching, she moves her hands to the outside of them and with one last push shoves them together.

Calder, Saul, Licorice, Honeysuckle, as you guys are all in there, there is a seismic blast of power that blows you guys all back, blows the plinths off the altar of the stars.

In the sky, as this happens, you see the sun literally collides with the moon and explodes, sending meteors showering through the sky.

I'm supposed to be the meteor witch.

The weather begins to rapidly change now that the fucking moon has exploded.

You feel the entire earth shift.

But then Jovir takes the new joined crown, the sealy and unseely crown, this flowery crown of thorns with shadowy tendrils that look like sunspots and puts it on her head.

As she does, there is this blinding explosion of light as Jove takes a new form.

You see, she levitates and glows with power.

The front of her robe is now pure sunfire.

The back is of dull moonlight.

She now has two faces, that of a primordial summer eladron.

And behind it on the moonlight side, a greater winter eladron.

Both sides speak at the same time.

My people, you have nothing to fear.

I command the stars themselves.

As the sky turns to havoc, you see she pulls at the heavens and literally brings other stars and moons closer to the earth.

The chaos of the weather around you stops and she begins to control weather patterns.

You see, suns and moons, almost like when you guys were in the beast lands and saw like the magical different phases of the moons.

it's like that she's able to just shift it from day to night and perfectly control the weather here wow she has taken on a powerful new form

and as she finishes uh she had to use an action to do that so that is the end of her turn something okay that's good at least yeah after her turn that is saul's turn okay wow The gossip rags are going to love this.

Yeah, you see the other dragons in the air look around.

You see Princess Shiverblight goes, um, what the fuck is going on?

I'm taking notes for the Peregrine Post.

You'll be reading all about it in the Peregrine Post, which is hypothetically an awesome new gossip brag, assuming everyone fights their best.

But you can subscribe now to get our first edition.

Two faces, kind of a fashion faux pas, I think.

Yeah.

Okay.

Saw that as your draft.

Okay.

Well, let's get licorice to go ahead and try and drain that last legendary resistance.

Okay.

Roll to see if you get the breath back.

Yeah.

Fuck.

That's a four.

Okay.

You guys are finally not rolling perfect on your D6.

But I'll go ahead and use my bonus action for Licorice to try and recharge it.

Oh, sick.

Yeah.

Go ahead and use your key.

Do a re-roll.

It's three key.

Hell yeah.

Not a key.

Fuck.

Shout out to the two crew.

Okay.

Okay.

Yeah, I think then in that case, me and Licorice are just going to tag Team Jovira.

She's got two faces.

There's two of us.

I think we're going to start launching our attacks right at her face and then at the last minute shift and just like punch the shit out of her ears.

Sick,

yeah.

You just go to hit her in the middle, licorice on one side, you jump off and attack on the other side.

All right, I'll make all my attacks at once.

Um, I'm gonna go ahead and flurry a blows as well.

That's 31, uh, 25, another 31, 18, and 19.

18 does not hit, the rest do.

Okay,

yeah, use a bardic on that 18.

Oh, sick.

Okay, hits no matter what.

Her AC is 19.

Oh, awesome.

Yeah, she's still just an arch Fae in a robe, but she doesn't have super high AC.

Despite 25 hits,

I'm still just an archfey.

Despite all my ray.

Despite all my rays.

I'm still just

an

archfey.

So it's going to be five hits plus my extra poison die.

Oh, yeah, you're still hasty.

I'm still hasty.

I'm like reliving all of the stories that Albin and I had.

I feel like that's like what the haste is doing is it's just like really invigorating me thinking about all of our adventures.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think about the time that we entered the Room of Snakes.

Yeah.

And it was just like clearly that like the administrators had like run out of ideas and we just came into a big room of snakes.

Yeah.

I think Saul, as you attack and you strike Jovere and you see how far you all have come and you look up and you see this airship with Mob Goblin and Albin is lobbing lightning bolts off the side of the ship and attacking Wyverns and stuff.

You think back to your time at Launch Pad and like those challenges were illusions to a certain extent, but you guys didn't know that.

Like, you were brave and you grew up there.

You became heroes eventually.

So...

Yeah, as I, like, launch into Jove, I scream, we decide what's real!

54 points of damage.

Wow.

Yes, dude.

Jove has just taken on this new form as a god, the first ever, like, sealy and unseely queen.

So commanding literally the planet.

But Saul, she reacts to you striking her.

You are going toe-to-toe with a literal god right now.

Bam, bam, bam.

Yeah, you're still corporeal.

Yep.

And Licorice may make attacks as well.

All right.

Three attacks.

Bite, tail, and

25 to hit for bite.

Hits.

Oh, 23 to hit for slam.

Hits.

30 to hit for tail.

Hits.

59 points of damage.

Wow.

Woo!

Okay.

After your turn, though, she has unlocked new power.

She is going to cast her one and only ninth level spell.

She is going to cast a spell called Meteor Swarm.

It is going to bring down blazing orbs of fire, plummet to the ground at four different points you can see within range.

Each creature in a 40-foot radius sphere centered on each point you choose must make a dexterity saving throw.

The sphere spreads around corners.

A creature takes 20d6 fire damage and 20d6 bludgeoning damage on a failed save or half as much on a successful one.

So you see she has brought in new moons as she just like commands the cosmos now.

But the original moon that fucking exploded, she just brings it down to the earth with telekinetic energy.

And you see asteroids just begin blowing up the battlefield.

Everybody's got to do saves here.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

And it is dexterity saves.

So the people that are on serpents

can add the plus five.

Okay.

And that includes, I'm going to say, Callie, you getting up there and like whispering in her ear, she is allowing you to ride her, even though she's still like mounted now.

Yeah, you're still mounted.

If I'm mounted and my mount makes a deck save to take only half damage, it takes takes no damage instead.

Because of my mounted combatant.

Okay, so if Marigold saves, she takes no damage.

Okay.

Marigold actually fails the roll.

Oh.

But is going to use a legendary resistance.

Oh, sick.

So this is going to be an insane amount of damage.

But while mounted, if your dragon or serpent takes half damage, you are now saving from half damage.

Oh, great.

So you will either take half damage or quarter damage.

Okay.

But since I'm mounted on her, mounted combatant means she takes no damage.

Oh, she used the legendary.

Oh, wow.

Okay, but she used a legendary resistance, so she takes zero damage.

Hell yeah.

I rolled a nat one.

Would you like to use Indomitable on Honeysuckle?

Yeah, you guys are connected.

That's 17.

17 fails.

I'll use a legendary.

Okay.

And then what did Licorice get on his deck save?

Licorice got a 26.

Okay, that passes.

Yeah.

So everyone is trying to save from half.

What did you guys get now?

26 as well.

Shout out to the two crew.

Okay.

26.

Callie passes.

Okay.

So Callie, you take quarter damage.

Okay.

So half damage of this is 65 damage.

Oh my lord.

Wow.

That's a lot.

Calliope, you take 32 damage.

Okay.

Saul, you take none because it was a deck save.

Yep.

So you're all good.

You just jump off licorice for a moment as the meteor hits the fucking earth.

As a piece of the moon crashes into your serpent.

Hey, that shouldn't happen.

Yeah, hey.

It's not supposed to be down here.

That is now Calder's turn.

Okay.

Okay.

So how many legendary resistances have

Marigold gone through?

Marigold has one left.

Okay.

Go for it.

Let me see if I get the earthquake back.

Yes.

That's a six.

Oh, okay.

Okay.

When you're doing it not on land, I'll say it's these like seismic waves that are punching into her.

Shout out to the two who she fails.

I saw that too, and I was like, this is the best possible outcome.

So here's the deal.

That's what's up.

She's out of legendary resistances, but she's still charmed.

If that makes sense.

Yeah, she's only one over, but out of legendary resistances, but go ahead and do your damage.

She does have to take damage, unfortunately.

So she'll take half of whatever you do.

No, she won't, because if she's saved, I'm mounted combatant.

Got it.

Oh, wow.

She does not take any damage then.

Don't do any damage.

Fucking perfect.

That is honeysuckle.

I whisper in her ear, it's me.

It's because I love you so much that you've not taken any of this damage.

You

feel

the tension in her neck starts to kind of soften.

Because I feel your connection to Syrah and I have a connection to Syrah too.

You follow her gaze and as she sees Syrah, her eyes start to get clear.

After Honeysuckle's turn, Calder, you may still act.

Nice.

Okay.

I'm going to steer Honeysuckle away and just say, hey, leave your sister alone.

I think she's a lot stronger stronger than you.

If you do that, though, she is going to get an opportunity attack.

Then I'll just have, I'll use Honeysuckle's reaction and have him fling me 80 feet towards Jovier.

Sick!

That's awesome.

Hell yeah.

Honeysuckle uses his manipulation of gravity and throws Calder off towards Queen Jovier.

I'm just going to shoot out like a needle with my sword in front of me and hope that I pierce her like a dart.

21, 17, 19.

17 doesn't hit, other two do.

Fuck it.

I'm going to use the last charge from the helm and get two more d12s.

Okay, last charge.

Body pulsating with energy, but instead of being empowered by Ultras, you look down and see your brother Gregor.

You see your brother Gowan.

You see the other frost giants starting to take Castle Winter, and that inspires you.

It inspires me to do 66 damage

for the ice knife.

Fuck yeah.

You swing your mother's sword, Shard.

You stab three times into Jovir.

She reacts, but keeps at it.

She is powered up since she has completed this ritual.

She now can use one legendary action to add two to both of her troops.

So you see she reaches her hand up and you see she literally like moves the sun to create shadows over her ground troops and then turns back to her moonside to animate the shadows.

And she does the same thing in the air as more shadowy Wiverns and Draco Liches appear.

She's going to add plus two to both of those.

That is Marigold's turn.

Marigold's just going to try to get her breath weapon back.

Fails.

Honeysuckle right there.

We got Licorice.

She's going to keep getting beat up licorice.

Oh, no.

Why?

You're going to regret this, Marigold.

At the end of this, you're going to

really hate that you did this.

She does manage to hit three times.

Okay, I know you're having big feelings right now, but don't take him out on your brother.

48 damage to licorice.

Okay.

After Marigold's turn, that is Aerial Warfare, baby.

Okay,

you've got Mob Goblin is used up right now.

Dragons are used up.

Garage is used up.

Yeah, they're all used up right now.

Should we each roll a d6?

Yeah, let's each roll a d6.

I'll roll for Garash.

I got a five.

Okay, Garach is back.

Garash is in play.

Garash is in play.

I got a one.

The dragons are not.

Dragons are not in play.

I've got a six.

Mob Goblin is in play.

Dope.

Good for you you guys.

All right.

Right now it is plus zero versus plus two.

What would you guys like to add to your guy?

Okay, well, your guys.

Yeah, let's do the mob goblin.

Mob goblin for sure.

Mob goblin is plus one.

Look at that plus one.

And then you'll see if you need to use a reaction, if you need to use garage.

Okay.

Two over here.

That's a four.

We got a four as well.

So let's just stay contested.

Four.

You guys want to just stay contested?

Let's stay contested.

Yeah, okay.

That's fine.

If the ground heroes end up taking the castle, those NPCs can get into play.

And as long as the the air fight stays even, no more bad guys enter the battlefield, if that makes sense.

You just don't get new allies.

Okay, cool.

Cool.

Yeah, yeah.

So that stays deadlocked.

Okay.

That is Kenna's turn.

Kenna is going to bonus action, give a help action to Saul.

Hey.

And then...

Wait, does Calden need a heal?

Oh, yeah.

I think I'm far away from her now because I

got flung to joke.

Oh, wait, is she near me?

She is near.

Yeah.

Okay.

I will take it if she's offering.

Yeah.

She'll She'll do a full action to do a potion.

4d4 plus 4, so 20 HP.

Oh, that's huge.

Thank you, Kenna.

Big assist.

You're welcome.

After Kenna's turn, that's Callie's turn.

All right.

All right.

So then I'm just going to cast Dispel Magic.

Calliope, go ahead, and you've got to beat an 18.

10, 20.

Nice.

Calliope, what do you do as you cast dispel magic to free Marigold from this dominate monster monster spell.

I'm just really gently sort of petting her, and I'm pointing out everyone on the battlefield that she has a relationship with, and I'm like whispering about them.

And I'm saying, now that's Syra.

I know you love Syrah.

You and her are bonded at the hip.

And that's Trish.

She's friends with Syrah.

So she's going to be around a lot, but she's kind of annoying.

You'll be able to take refuge from her.

And that's Licorice.

And he makes lightning.

And he's your brother.

And then that's honeysuckle.

And he can make the earth move and he's also your brother and that's colder and sore and they're bonded to your brothers and I'm Clyope and I'm bonded to you.

Clyope,

you feel this flash of recognition from her.

It all comes together at once.

You flashback to you comforting Licorice after you saved him from Glenn.

Then you see a flashback of Mirigold's first memory of hatching and seeing Syrah.

She understands the connection now of her and her brothers, of you and Syrah and her.

You see, she looks down at Syrah on the platform and prepares to go to her.

No,

right now,

we need to keep Syrah safe, and the way to do that is to go after her.

And I point to Jovir.

You feel that the serpent understands that, then turns and looks at Jovere, and you see smoke starts coming out of her nostrils.

And here is

Marigold's stat sheet.

Let's go.

All right.

She's got serpent inspiration.

When Calliope gives out bardic inspiration or uses a flourish, Marigold gives her inspiration.

Whoa!

Awesome.

She also has Draconic Smite.

If she can do this as a reaction on her turn, if Marigold is making a melee attack, she may use her reaction to imbue her claws with one of Callie's divine smites.

So if you want to add a smite to one of her claws, you can do that.

That's awesome.

After Callie's turn, that is Ground Warfare, baby.

They have

a negative one, but a plus two boost from Jove.

So they've got plus one right now, and you guys are plus zero.

Yeah, but let's see if we can recharge Knights, Giants, and Ottomatons.

Come on, trash can.

Beep, beep, beep, beep.

How are they?

I can't believe how good you guys are rolling on these hero points.

Wow.

Free yourself from the wicked ways of your mother.

Wow.

Have a destiny all your own.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, you see the automatons charge forward.

They add plus two to the roll on the ground.

Okay.

So I'm going to go ahead and roll a D6.

Plus one to this.

You guys get plus two to your.

Yeah.

Four, plus one, five over here.

What do you get?

Damn, I got a five also.

Five total?

Yeah, five total.

I rolled a three.

Wait, but we can swap.

Maybe we use Jaina Bronze Pig.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, yes, yes, we swap and we win, right?

Okay, yeah.

If you want to swap, okay, so you look down

and you see that as the ground troops are starting to break down the gates of Castle Winter, giants and dwarves and knights are starting to run in,

but you hear Jaina on the comms telling them to fall back.

And you watch from above as they essentially lure a bunch of guys to charge out of the wall and then are able to like pincer attack them and just surround them on all sides and attack.

The lines of the ground are now broken.

They are at minus two and are at danger.

They will flee next round if they lose.

Yes.

So they are broken.

Huge.

After the ground battle, that is Queen Jove's turn.

you see queen jove is going to use an ability called solar rift she

pulls down a bit of literal like sun from the sky out of like a shadowy tendril that she manifests out of thin air flipping from her moonlight side to her sunlight side i'm gonna need a constitution saving throw from calder honeysuckle Licorice, and Saul.

Okay.

Okay.

So Honeysuckle crit.

Six.

Okay.

So Honeysuckle passes.

So we'll take half.

And then Calder got a 28.

Ooh.

Also passes.

Okay.

Okay.

Licorice got a natural one.

Okay.

Do you have any more legendary resistances?

I have one left.

Yes, use it.

Use it.

Use it.

Use it.

Saul got a dirty 20.

Okay.

Saul fails.

Licorice takes half.

Licorice takes 43.

You take 86.

You good?

Saul sees Licorice get hit by this sunlight and goes to comfort him, but doesn't notice the beam coming for him.

And he takes all 86 points of damage and he falls.

But

I've got three key points left.

Okay.

Wow.

Somewhere on the battlefield, I feel Igneous and Elzor, and I remember that connection to Shroom Rot, and the spores build up in me, and

I exhale this black, foggy mist of algae, and I'm back up.

Yeah.

You see Saul

disappears for a moment as you just see he is hit with sunfire.

Saul.

But when the dust settles, you see in smoldering clothing is your frog pal barely clinging to life.

You just hardened him into a diamond.

Yeah.

I just fixed these clothes.

And then Calder and Honeysuckle take 43 damage.

43 apiece.

Okay.

That is Saul's turn.

Okay.

So you're at one HP.

I sure am.

How much HP is what's licorice at?

Licorice is at 104 HP.

Okay.

Yeah.

Not good.

No, we're not doing great.

I feel like we might

take a lap.

Licorice, like a bunch of licorice's scales are like cracked and broken, and you can feel like this great beast, like the breathing is becoming more labored marigold is quite healthy right now if you guys wanted to like run and rendezvous with me more or something

hang in there pal let me at least see if uh licorice gets the breath weapon back yeah yeah

oh that's the natural one okay yeah licorice is getting close to toast okay i will say licorice makes death saving throws like anyone else yeah it's not an automatic death if he if he gets to zero i can't just turn tail and run so i think what we're gonna to do, we're going to give it our all, and then I'll use two more key points to disengage and retreat a little bit.

Sick.

Oh, man.

You're so down.

Like, he's so low, though.

It's going to be so bad if he gets hit.

These are my last two key points.

Oh, yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

I have to do it though.

You got to do it.

I'm going to do my attacks.

Saul's been fighting Jovere since the beginning, just trying to knock out this Arch Faye.

Just a frog is so long ago.

25, 31, 22.

All hit.

Nice.

Okay, that's three hits.

39 points of damage.

Nice.

Yes, dude.

Okay, she's starting to look within the realm of mortal right now.

You see,

blood is dripping down from her face.

Insolent fools.

I command the sun and the moon.

Okay, Callie, unfortunately, she is a fashion icon and she's goaded as hell right now.

I just feel like I was on stars and whatnot, and now she comes along and she does it better.

I know, honestly.

It's super derivative.

Thank you, Calder, but she's really making it work.

She's co-opting the look, but she's making it shine, and that is what the article in the Peregrine Post is going to say.

Unfortunately, I'm getting ideas from her.

But they're your ideas.

Go ahead and make your attacks with Licorice.

Yes.

Three attacks for Licorice.

Come on, big boy.

Bite 28.

Nat one on the slam, but that's still an 18.

Okay, and then a 24 on the tail.

18 misses.

Other ones hit.

Okay.

21 plus 20, so 41.

41.

41 points of damage.

Yeah.

Nice.

Yeah.

Licorice bites into her, and then I whistle, and then like we just slither backwards in the air.

Yeah, okay.

So you use your last two key points.

You see Saul still steaming on Licorice's back, flies back and launches back into the air as you disengage.

As that happens, can Kenna jump from Marigold to Licorice?

Oh, good idea.

Okay, yeah, you pick pick up Kenna with Licorice, and Kenna rides off with you guys.

Great call.

I'm naked except for my giant necklace, which is covering my junk.

Well, you also have your cloud cuff.

Oh, yeah, that's true.

Just a diamond necklace and a cloud cuff.

After Saul's turn, she's going to use two legendary actions to cast a spell.

She's going to cast a spell called Maddening Darkness.

You see, she reaches her hand up and literally just extinguishes one of the suns and creates complete darkness in a sphere around her.

Honeysuckle and Calder are currently in that sphere.

And next up in the initiative is Calder's turn.

So Calder, you are in complete darkness with Honeysuckle here.

The battlefield is silent.

You no longer hear anything going on outside.

It probably feels at first like you've been banished or maybe even killed.

Like, did she cast some death spell on you and send you to a void?

Because you don't even really see honeysuckle, but you feel him a little bit there with your connection to him.

Okay.

And after a moment of silence, you begin to hear dissonant whispers getting louder and louder, and you feel someone prying into your mind like psychic voices are asking you questions, and against your will, you're answering them.

Like they're digging up memories and bringing things forward.

Go ahead and give me a wisdom-saving throw and give me one for honeysuckle as well.

Man, is this real or is this just another haunted bathroom?

Call the ro-fee.

If you made a haunted bathroom, you have to invite us.

It's a dirty 20.

Dirty 20 fails.

I'm going to use Indomitable at my last Indomitable.

See if I can get out of it.

Not going to do it.

Okay.

It's only 17.

39 psychic damage to start your turn.

Okay.

And

roll it for honeysuckle as well.

You got a 22.

Okay.

You both fail.

Again, you feel, especially as you fail, you have to like clutch your head.

You feel this like ringing in your ears and you drop to your knees and you feel someone rifling through your mind and you feel like...

memories of your childhood coming to the forefront.

You feel all of this embarrassment and exclusion and just all of these feelings coming back that you've recently grappled with, but now you feel this very old reaction to them.

And you hear Jovere's voice go,

Ah,

a little brother.

I can relate.

I am the youngest as well.

I can't relate to you at all.

You killed your sister.

Yes, yes.

The perfect fairy queen.

Everything handed to her.

Such was her right for being spit out a few years before me.

Loved purely for existing.

Yeah, yeah, my brothers were born big, and I wasn't.

And I grappled with that for a long time.

But I grew up.

It doesn't sound like you ever did.

Oh,

I grew up.

I was a touch sentimental once.

When I first clawed my way to a crown, crown, I thought I could use my new power to protect my sweet sister.

But we needed protecting from her.

She made the face soft.

The future

was ruinous with her at the helm.

The future was ruinous because you ruined it.

You only see what you want to see.

As you say that, there is a palpable doubt in the air.

But then she goes,

Fine.

You can't relate to me.

There are two kinds of little brothers, sidekicks and usurpers, and I suspect you are the former.

Let us cut to the chase.

Your brother has been wounded.

You see...

In the darkness, swirling translucent figures, almost like ghosts locked in battle.

And you recognize the landscape.

This is the ground battle down here.

And your troops are winning, but you see that Gregor has been wounded and dropped.

He is at the gates of Castle Winter and was struck by a ballista bolt head-on as he crashed the gates.

You see, he is bleeding out against the wall.

And Jovier goes,

I can save him.

You needn't join my side.

You just keep your sword at your side while you're in here.

Kalyan Saul will never know.

You feel her presence disappear, and you are again alone in the darkness.

I feel like I I listen to my breath

echoing

and then I start to feel Honeysuckle's breath and his breath breathing with me makes me feel stronger

and

and I pick up my sword

You completely cannot see in here so you don't know that you can hit her but Honeysuckle's earthquake is area of effect, so he wouldn't need to see so see if you can re-roll that.

She forgot that I have another brother.

That's a six, baby.

Oh my God.

So, yeah, you guys have been rolling fucking incredible on these D6s.

Okay, so you're in this darkness here.

Go ahead and roll your damage for your earthquake as you have honeysuckle burrow into the ground.

If you do enough damage, she might lose her concentration and then you would be out of this weird void and then you'll be able to attack as well.

Come on.

Honeysuckle.

Om Nom.

Om Nom Nom

Nom Nom, baby.

That's 76 damage.

Jesus

Nom Nom indeed.

Okay, okay.

My bro is hungry.

It's got to be impossible, right?

Okay.

Oh, I guess she halves it.

Okay, she can show she halves it.

So if she rolls a nat 20 or a 19, she will pass.

Okay.

I'm going to roll in front of the table here.

Okay.

That is a 10.

That's a 10.

Get numb.

All right.

Honeysuckle burrows into the ground.

You don't need to see anything because you feel the reverberations all around you.

And slowly, slowly, there are cracks in the facade around you as the shadows break away.

Jove is hit for 72 damage.

Takes a staggering amount of damage.

As you see a bunch of like the plinths blow off the side of the altar of stars here.

And Callie, you're up here.

Saul, you're still up here on Licorice and Marigold.

And you guys see Calder appears out of the darkness here.

That's right.

Yeah.

That's right.

You forgot that Calder's from the north, where the nights are the longest.

He's not afraid of the dark.

That's right.

And Calder, you may now take your attacks.

Oh, all right.

Let's see what I get.

17, dirty, 20, and a 22.

Last two hit, 17 does not hit.

So as soon as you appear, Jovir throws up her claws and blocks and holds onto you.

Should have taken the deal.

Why?

You didn't see yourself losing?

31.

And you slash into her twice and do 31 damage, she is starting to look extremely fucked up.

You see, with each hit now, the blood is flowing.

She is no longer looking completely invincible.

Hell yeah.

After Calder's turn, Queen Jovier is going to see if she gets a legendary action no matter what, but she's going to see if she can get back her Solar Rift, the thing that she did a ton of damage with before.

And she does.

That is a five.

She is going to...

How far were we able to get away?

On Licorice, his fly speed is 80 feet.

Okay.

Unfortunately.

He's really far.

Yes, that is pretty far.

That's pretty far.

That's too far, dude.

The range on this is 150 feet.

So I'm going to need constitution-saving throws from you and Licorice.

Okay.

And actually, Kenna needs to do one as well because she's there with Licorice.

Oh, right.

Oh, fuck.

Kenna rolls pretty good, but fails because Jovere's save is so high right now.

Put on your snow goggles, Kenna.

14 for me.

Okay.

And a 23 for Licorice.

Okay.

Licorice, unfortunately, just fails.

Oh,

my God.

Saul, it kind of didn't matter if you failed or you passed because you're at 1 HP.

Right.

The rest of you see Jove reaches out a finger and causes one of the suns to brighten, emitting a solar flare that shoots a beam down at Licorice and Saul.

There is an explosion.

As Licorice whips through the air, Kenna, Saul, and Licorice take 71 damage.

Kenna is knocked out.

Saul is knocked out.

What does that put Licorice at?

That puts...

That's 31 HP.

Okay.

So Licorice stays up, but is writhing and screeching through the air, steaming, having just been set aflame.

Go ahead and give me a dexterity-saving throw for Licorice.

If he can hit a DC-20, he can hang on to you and Kenna without thrashing you off in the aftershock, essentially.

Okay.

Another fucking three.

God damn it.

That's a 10.

Okay.

Callie and Calder, you see in the distance, explosion, and then two falling bodies out of off of Licorice.

Okay, so since we're closer to Licorice than Jovir is, can I cast Featherfall

on both Saul and Kenna?

Yes, you can.

Okay, so what that will do, that's not going to have them land perfectly safely, but it will stop them from taking a death-saving fail as they hit the water.

They're not going to fall for max damage now.

I think I point at them, and

like a magician, Foster comes out of my sleeve.

Yeah.

Yeah, you see Foster flies out, shoots out some magic.

Saul, you feel like a favorable wind go under you as you think you're about to plummet to your death.

And Callie, you watch as Kenna and Saul begin falling slower but still very quickly and then out of sight into the raging waters below

okay um can I get on the head on the headset yeah okay and say ground ground do you read me we've got like a big emergency we need someone who could heal I'm I'm thinking Ursa

Coralil gunk okay Ursa have you got have you got eyes on gunk

yeah he's right here he's doing incredible he must be so proud so good can you he just keeps smashing into the water making big waves go up and yelling ready to smite oh my god okay well i need him to heal saw and kenna they've plummeted from the sky into some water oh yeah i'm sure you might you who are tuned into the water might have felt the impact i did feel two unconscious bodies hit the water yeah

unconscious though they're not they haven't failed any death saves though that's good yeah that is really good but we just really want to get ahead all right let me reach out let me patch you in psychically to Gong.

Oh, really?

I was going to message you.

I was hoping that just you.

Ready to save.

Gunk.

Yeah.

One of your daddies is fallen.

Patty?

Yes.

Ready to save.

Ready to lay hands.

Ready to be palleted out of the water.

You're ready to lead.

You're ready to lead, my son.

You gunk hands.

The knights of the prawn table take off into the water in search.

In search of their daddy.

That is marigold's turn so Callie may act on that initiative okay nice we're just gonna go after jovia okay

go ahead and make your attacks she is completely visible now that honeysuckle has broken her concentration uh this sphere is gone And I'm mounted so I can attack with advantage.

Hell yeah.

Okay.

So this is yet your first time really getting to spend a full turn with the bonded Marigold.

So you feel Starfire shoots up through her and goes up through your sword.

Okay, let's do this, girly.

That is a 34, a 31, and a 35.

Jesus.

Because I've got my magic weapon going.

Okay, yeah, you just do a fly-by on Marigold.

Go ahead, and do you want to apply any kind of smites or anything?

Yeah, I'm going to do two highest level by using upcasting, and then I've got a third.

Okay, great.

Okay, that is 120,000.

Jesus Christ.

Oh my God.

Callie, As you slash into her, you see she has two forms of herself, right?

She's got this one that is like a summer eladron and one that is a winter eladron.

They're like these two separated sides and she's switching faces as she's casting different spells, like the sun spells or the moon spells.

She switches back between the two of them.

As you slash into her, you see her form begins to become like incorporeal and starts to warp and change and the two sides are becoming combined.

This This is such a mind fuck to be fighting a winter and summer allegory.

Yeah.

Syrah.

No focus.

And then I'm going to let Marigold attack.

Okay.

And I'm going to give her.

I have a second level smite I can give her.

Okay.

Yeah.

You use Marigold's ability to use her reaction to fill her claws with the power of your smites.

She takes two claw attacks and bites in.

Yeah, I think I like breathe on her claws.

Ooh.

Meteor witch has worm storm

does 23 or 30 or 26 hits.

Yeah, all three hits.

That is 80 damage.

She marries.

Okay, you are tearing her apart.

She is starting to look very mortal.

She's getting desperate, pulling at the heavens, trying to destroy the Fey Wild so that she can kill you right now.

As she looks very mortal, I think I look at her and I'm like, this is your true face.

She looks scared.

After Calliope and Marigold's turn, that would typically be aerial warfare.

But we don't have to waste a ton of time on that.

You guys are low on health.

Jovier's low on health.

Neither side is going to go from deadlocked to winning in time.

The air battle is tied.

Those allies aren't going to be able to get to Saul to save him.

But you guys...

could use the dragon hero point to give ground support for the ground battle because that's ultimately what's important yeah so yeah yeah we need the ground to get to soul and kenner so yeah so you need to win the next ground battle uh so go ahead and roll a d6 to see if you can get the dragons back

come on come on come on

that's a far okay

oh man i love playing with d6s there's so many less numbers to play so many there's so many pretty good numbers on a d6

probably

so air battles pretty much tied but they're able to get enough of an advantage that they can lose some of the dragons.

You see Shiver Blight and Big Bev come down and provide air cover.

Your ground battle roll will now add plus two.

Next in the initiative is Kenna, who has disappeared.

We don't know what's happening to her.

We will go to the ground battle.

If you win this, that will allow your NPCs to come into play so Gunk can go look for Saul and Kenna.

Did we use a Corlo last time?

No.

Didn't.

A Corlo is not.

Yeah.

Ooh, speaking of a Corlo, can Saul, as he's falling, be like, Wave, mommy, if I ever meant anything to you, if there was ever a chance.

Okay, it's up to me to roll now, right?

So that's a one.

The Knights and Giants and Automatons do not recharge.

Do not recharge.

Okay.

And did we use Jane of Bronze Beard?

Do we need to see if that recharges?

We have to recharge that.

We have to recharge that.

So you have to see if you get a five or a six.

All right, I'm going to.

There we go.

Let's get Jane a dice.

Oh, that's a one.

Okay.

All right.

All right.

So we're going to roll D6s.

You got a plus two.

They've got a minus two so they need to roll

quite good uh the ground troops are losing here your guys are storming the castle taking over castle winter here

what did you get i rolled a five i got a so that's seven total uh two over here which is a zero

yes they fully like a corralo brings a great wave that like collapses the castle like the ground the ground battle is over you hear cries going up of victory on that initiative, on that ground initiative, you can have a ground ally help.

So,

a Coralil

will command Gunk, or we'll just suggest a Gunk.

Gunk is a paladin, so

Akoralil is going to release the Gunk stats.

Acoralil is going to do a perception check with Advantage to try to find you guys in the wall.

Okay.

Natural tools.

Yes!

Oh my God.

She knows her lover's voice.

Okay.

So what do you think Saul is thinking in

this moment as he I'll say like you feel yourself falling, but you look over to the land, you see that you guys are winning the fight, you see in the air that Albin and the dragons and everybody are starting to take over the Wyverns.

What is Saul thinking in these last moments?

I think Saul is

terrified at first, but then as he looks around and sees the shape of the battlefield, he kind of smiles and knows that even without him, he's done everything he can and everyone has this well in hand.

This might be the end of Saul, but it's not the end of Duck Team.

It's not the end of the world.

So

he closes his eyes and a small smile hits his face as he lands in the water.

Saul, you hit the water.

Everything goes black.

A moment later, you feel

fishy hands

under you.

You feel someone casting a healing spell on you.

We're going to cast

mask your wounds on you and Kenna.

Yes!

You pop up with 14 HP.

You look up

and you see this beautiful giant woman.

Hair of seaweed, giant fish face, giant fish bottom.

She is holding you up over the water as you're prone lying there.

You see, Gunk is holding up Kenna.

Kenna has just come to

like backs off from Gunk.

Oh, sorry, Gunk.

I forgot you.

You grew up.

A Coralo looks at you, Saul, and goes, oh, thank God.

You're all right.

No, don't thank God.

Thank you.

Acorlo brings you in for a kiss.

I kiss her with all the tongue I have.

Holy shit.

A Coralo, this giant primordial giant, and Saul start making out on the battlefield.

My goodness.

We thought he could pull Crown.

Turns out, Crown pulled him.

Yes!

Seriously!

So, Saul stabilizes.

Okay,

he's still.

He more than stabilizes, brother.

Stabilized babelized.

He's elevated.

Freaking babelized.

At the top of the round.

My God.

Queen Jovere is so desperate.

She's going to cast Firestorm, reaches her hand out and has another one of the suns just fucking explodes and you just see...

Stop doing that.

Star fire shoots out.

You are freaking...

Control it.

Control it.

Like, you were complaining about a god in outer space creating trouble.

You're ruining outer space.

I can defeat him.

You'll be lost without me.

All of these celestial bodies are just rubble to you now.

So, I need deck saving throws from all of the serpents

and all of their riders, but not Kenna or Salt, who are currently in the water.

Oh, yeah.

24 for Honeysuckle.

That's a nine.

Okay.

Marigold got a 13 only.

Okay.

Everyone who got lower than a 24 takes 38 damage.

Licorice had 31 hit points.

Licorice is shot out of the sky by a fireball of like a broken off piece of a star and spirals into the water below.

There is a seismic crash as licorice explodes into the water.

I'm also down.

Calder drops.

Saul, that is your turn.

You're down in the water.

You kind of can't realistically get to anybody.

Maybe you can get to licorice.

How far away is licorice?

I can run on water.

Oh.

Okay, give me a, I'll say, 30 feet away plus a D100.

Okay.

That's 89.

He is 80.

So he is 90 feet away from you in the water.

With a dash action and my ability to move on water, I can go 110 feet.

Yay!

Okay.

I grab a potion from Kenna and I deliver it into the mouth of Licorice with a bonus action.

Okay.

Yeah.

Saul, you rush along the water.

You get down from Akoral's arms.

Akoralil lets you know, I feel him on the water.

He's right in the direction where the giant serpent exploded into the water.

Thank you, babe.

I love your mind.

Yes.

Maybe we'll do it again sometime.

Just so you know, that was sex for me.

Awesome.

Oh.

Damn, Saul's had sex twice on this trip.

Saul's had weird water sex twice.

Yeah, you guys did a weird water dance as you kissed.

Yeah, yeah.

Saul's mouth is full of eggs.

Yeah.

You rush along the surface of the water.

You see, Licorice has just hit the water, has taken a death-saving fail because he couldn't get Featherfall.

And it's just labored breathing and beginning to sink.

As you go over, you put your hands on him.

You're not strong enough to keep him up.

He's sinking, sinking.

You rush along his scales, rush along his scales.

He's barely breathing, but you find his mouth.

You put a potion in.

He gets 4d4 plus force or just barely springs back to life.

Just...

Hang in there.

It all started with you.

You're the egg that this all began with.

You can't die.

Not here, not now.

Just sort of lets out a little hiss.

You see bubbles come out of his mouth.

Barely able to move, but gets you on top of his scales, so you're mounted again, and then surfaces on the water and just begins gliding towards like the ground battle slash towards where your friends are and where his sister and brother are.

Okay, is my earpiece still working?

Didn't get too much water in it?

Earpiece is still working.

Great.

I touch my earpiece.

It goes a little too far into my ear.

Static in my ear.

Oh, what is that?

This is Saul.

Ken and I aren't okay.

Oh, thank God.

Yeah, we're back in the fight.

What do we need?

What can I do?

Oh, um, Saul,

can you check on my brother?

Can you see Gregor down there?

Gregor, Gregor.

Um, can I scan?

Can I do a perception check?

Yeah, go ahead and I'll say you're on licorice.

Licorice has enough movement to get to the land.

Go ahead and give me a perception check with advantage.

Licorice perception is plus 16, so I'll use that.

That's okay.

Jesus Christ.

Okay, so what is that total?

That.

That's going to be a 25.

Jesus, okay, yeah.

So, licorice, I'll say you guys swoop down, you pick up Kenna.

Uh, Gunk tosses Kenna to you.

Happy now,

good luck, dad.

Thank you, my son.

Kenna joins you on the back of Licorice.

You guys fly over to uh, now there's like rallying cries and stuff going up, uh, and you do see that there are a few soldiers.

It looks like Gowan and Gregor got separated during the fight, otherwise, Gowan would be trying to help Gregor, but there are sort of lesser like knights and squires trying to help out Gregor, who is bleeding out.

I'm going to say he's had two death saves.

Oh, man.

So if he fails and rolls a one, or he rolls a one twice, he's dead, but otherwise he can be saved.

Okay.

One pass, one fail.

Gregor is still bleeding.

Silver Lily heading out to Twin Dingus.

Silver Lily heading to Twin Dingus.

What?

You guys are Twin Dingus.

We're Silver Lily.

It's that simple.

What is that?

Gregor's Twin Dingus.

We went over the code.

Sorry, I forgot.

Silver.

Okay, okay, silver serpent.

Okay, actually, that makes sense.

Did I not tell everyone the code?

I'm sorry.

It's like mid-battle.

My brain is.

It's a new thing.

We're throwing it at the edge.

I know.

We didn't talk about it during the battle, but we did.

I handed out the packet.

Okay, we're going.

I was just shrouded in darkness.

As you guys are saying that, Kenna's going to jump down, feed Gregor a potion.

Oh, you see, he kicks up, and the ballista bolt that was in him, as the skin around the wound begins to heal, it just shoots out.

Oh, fuck!

Oh,

it hurts in like my fucking nards, dude.

That sounded hilarious.

That's really good.

Hold on, let me do a quick nard check.

I bop him.

You bop him.

He goes back down.

He starts making death saves.

No.

Okay.

Yes.

So Saul and Kenna have saved Gregor down here.

They are down in the ground battle that is currently being won.

You see, the enemy is fleeing.

Okay.

After Saul's turn, Queen Jolvier is going to take a

legendary action and attack Calder with advantage.

Disadvantage.

Disadvantage, why?

He's got the displacer scarf.

Yeah.

He does have the displacer scarf, so this will be flat because he's prone and out.

Yeah, okay.

So we'll roll flat.

21 still gonna hit.

I don't get the three-quarter cover from the serpent if I'm not.

Let's do this.

Go ahead and roll a deck-saving throw for Honeysuckle to keep you on his back while you fall unconscious.

DC20.

17.

23.

23 passes.

Okay.

Yes.

You do get some cover, and that stops her from hitting you.

Honeysuckle takes the hit for you.

As well as the Displacer patch.

Yes.

Yeah.

Between the Displacer patch and honeysuckle, your friends protect you from possibly her being able to kill you in a couple rounds of initiative.

After that, that is your turn, Calder.

Go ahead and give me a death-saving throw.

It's an 11.

11 11 passes.

Okay, okay.

You start to stabilize.

You feel honeysuckle underneath you, still fighting.

You can still fight

for Calder's turn.

That is marigold.

Isn't it Honeysuckle's turn?

Oh, can Honeysuckle?

Oh, yeah, does Honeysuckle get to go?

And then Honeysuckle still gets to act.

Yeah.

All right.

Let's see if this Earthquake comes back.

Four.

No.

But we're going to bite, Slam, and Tail.

Okay.

Why not?

Bite, Slam, and Tail.

My favorite menu option at Red Lobster.

That's a nat 20 on the bite.

Nat 20, 34, 24.

All three hit.

74 damage.

Honeysuckle, finish Queen Jovier.

Oh, my God.

So, Calder, you are knocked out, but you have enough of a connection to Honeysuckle that as he makes the final attack on Queen Jove,

you begin to come to hazy-eyed.

I'll say you're at one HP.

Oh, awesome.

All right, I guess I imagine honeysuckle's like almost like an earthquake-shattering call.

Yeah.

Rumbles and wakes me up.

And I want to stand up shakily and call to the other serpents and to Callie and Saul so we can all chomp on this crown together.

I'll take a bite of a crown too.

Yeah.

Let's do it.

Okay.

Calder also wants to actually eat the crown.

Yeah, I'm going to take one bite.

I'm going to take one bite.

You guys are going to take a bite?

Okay.

All six of us are going to take a bite.

All right.

You see honeysuckle does a like vicious bite that like breaks Jovier's body.

You see her floating and just looking dead-eyed, reaching up and trying to use her power, but she's not strong enough.

You see it begins to drain her as she's trying to cast high-level spells.

She's withering away, withering away.

All three serpents fly up into the sky.

They whip around to face the crown.

You see a ball of lightning forms in Licorice's mouth.

One of gravitational waves forms in honeysuckles, and star fire forms in marigold.

They dive bomb down to the crown and release their magic in a three-pronged attack.

As the breath weapons converge, you see at the point of impact, there is a seismic explosion.

Ripples of power shoot out into the sky as the entire planet trembles.

The sky and the seas are chaos after Jove has warped the gravity of the planet and it gets even more unstable

as the all-powerful crown loses its bearer, loses its form.

You see, the moment this wild raw power hits the atmosphere and it stops being attuned to someone, it sends another shockwave of power around the battlefield, at first blowing you all back, but after a moment pulling you all in.

You see the other combatants on the ground and the ones in the air begin floating, many of them in random directions but the more magical beings are being drawn to this power you see the serpents the young stags unark jaina trash can the primordial giants some of like the dragons you even see sira with triss 2 desperately clinging to her is being like pulled towards it but she's still mostly out and she just looks up at you Callie and goes like my god Callie what's happening just hang on it will be okay I say not knowing

where the crown was there is now a black hole of energy with sun fire whipping around the outside of it you look up in the sky and see Meteors falling.

The temperature rises and drops wildly.

The landscape of the Fae is radically changing.

If not for the primordial giant lords and their mastery over the elements you'd already be dead this is apocalyptic you see Garach is trying to keep the wind from blowing everybody together but also there's kind of no gravity so people are just floating away the only thing keeping you guys here is raw magic and the fact that the crown and the power is essentially kind of

judging you.

It's almost like sentient and it's pulling you and then rejecting other people.

So you see other people just kind of like flying off.

Some of the, you know, primordial giants and stuff, like Akorilla, like, looks at it, kind of tempted.

There's a few people that look like they might go in and try to grab it.

You see the young stag looks at the power, looks like a dying star in the middle of the battlefield and goes, This is it.

This is what we need to bring your queen back, right?

Well, I thought...

I thought we could use it to resurrect Cyrilla, but...

She would not want to save her life at the expense of the Fae.

This needs to be used to stabilize the realm.

Okay, can we all do it together?

If we

spread it out, maybe it can't corrupt us.

I don't know.

Yeah, all this raw magic floating here, absolutely immense.

And Garash goes, We can definitely all help as best we can.

We need a powerful spell.

We need a wish, and we need someone to cast it.

I don't.

I don't have a spells thought for that.

No, I don't know that spell.

I'm sorry.

What about you?

I don't know how the raw magic will work, but the crown only amplified what was already there.

If there's anyone here with knowledge of Arcana and a strong constitution, they may be our only hope.

Calder, that's you.

Okay.

Yeah,

I've got a strong...

I've got a strong constitution, but...

Calder, hey, look at me, look at me.

This is what you were meant for.

You can do this.

I nod and my eyes go big and water as I look at Sol and Callie.

You've got this.

Is this going to be a check?

Can I give him guidance?

It is going to be a check.

Okay.

Yeah, I'll give Calder guidance.

And I'll give him an inspiration.

So, Calder,

by taking this on, you are essentially trying to take this raw magic and channel it.

This is not something that can be done lightly, and this is something that could kill you if you fail your constitution saving throw here.

After you make your constitution saving throw you will then make an arcana check to see if you can cast a spell that is much higher than you are typically prepared to do.

Okay.

This is all Calder ever actually wanted was for people to trust him.

to put their fate in his hands.

So it is time for him to step up.

And he steps forward.

Calder, you reach forward.

You see the tendrils whip around you.

They reach out and begin climbing up your wrist and then suddenly yank you into the strange swirl here.

You guys see Calder starts to be absorbed by this like black hole in the middle.

And as it absorbs you, Calder, you feel an overwhelming sense of power.

You get the rush from the feeling that you'd normally get by casting a spell, but it just keeps coming and coming and coming, overflowing, overwhelming you.

Go ahead and give me a constitution saving throw.

Oh man, thank God I'm wearing a cloud cup.

Oh yeah, it's a 26.

26.

Okay.

You guys watch from the outside as Calder doubles over, but then rears back and alights with flame and energy.

Calder, this is unstable, but you feel that you have enough control to cast one

ninth level spell, one wish.

The only problem is, this is elemental magic, born of the sun and the moon.

And since moonlight is a reflection of the sun, the energies aren't all that different.

It's fire, Calder.

You need to conjure a spark in order to light this spell.

I need Calder to go ahead and give me a DC-20 Arcana check.

So every time Calder has tried to conjure fire before, he's just been thinking: flame, heat, fire, be there, be warm.

And

now he's thinking he's from the frigid north, he's from the ice knife, and maybe he just has to think about the coldest nights that he's ever huddled up with his brothers

because that was when they got warm by the fire.

So he thinks about being

cold.

Okay.

So far that's a 10.

Okay.

Okay.

Alright, so you have a D4 and then bardic.

And a D10.

Alright, I'll use my bardic first.

Okay.

That's a 10, baby.

Okay.

Thank you, Callie.

Okay, so you guys may make a wish.

What do we wish for?

Callie, you're the one that's always had a wish for the Fey Wild.

Yeah.

I mean, the Fey Fey Wild's really changed over the past couple minutes, so I feel like the wish I would have would be to put it back the way it was

before Jove did what she did.

This is a crazy idea, and feel free to shoot it down, but what if we let Foster make the wish?

He speaks for the wild, Foster.

What would you wish?

Hops down and then

looks at

the serpents and sort of gestures out to

all of the humanoids.

Foster doesn't speak this in any language, but you just understand what he'd like.

He'd like to see

the spirit of the beastlands revived,

but for humanoids to be able to thrive here,

for there to be

a

world

where

the wild and society could coexist.

Yeah, I think that's what I was always getting at.

So, yeah.

Unpredictably beautiful.

Also, it'd be nice to put all the meteors back into the sky.

Calder clicks his fingers and makes a tiny flame like a lighter in his hand.

Ow, fuck that time.

Careful, we're gonna start calling you Zippo.

As he retracts his hand, you see that the fire explodes out into millions of magical particles.

They look like glowing wisps.

There is a never-ending cascade of them floating around you here.

But you see others float up to the sky and begin to link together, creating a protective barrier between the planet and the astronomical havoc that is happening beyond.

And you see, as the barrier stabilizes, there is a calm that washes over the land here.

The ocean stops moving, the mountains stop collapsing, and everyone remains floating mid-air instead of like flying off in all directions.

You look all around you, and with this emanating magic, you enter a sort of hive mind

and can see the entire planet.

You see that it has been wrecked by this battle, not just this fight, but the fights before it.

Towns were raided.

Most of the autumn court was abandoned.

The summer court was under siege.

And even before that, the power of the crowns had divided the continents into different forever seasons that have been warped now a few times over.

This planet has been in desperate need of saving for a while now.

You see the magical particles begin glowing and fusing into the serpent's scales.

They glow with ancient power.

We're going to go down the line.

Calder, how does honeysuckle heal the Fae with his power?

I guess just like a plow needs to go through a field to turn it over and bring new soil.

Yeah.

A honeysuckle will

do a nice om-nom nom, but like near the surface of everything.

Yeah.

So honeysuckle goes around.

creates fresh soil

where life can grow again.

Saul, how does Licorice heal the Feywild with his power?

I think that

Licorice flies up into the sky and you see the moonlight glinting off of his scales.

And then he dives down into the ocean and swims up a tributary and becomes all the rivers.

And you see them glinting with this silver light as they're purified and this renewed magical purity and chaos uh just is delivered throughout the fey wild beautiful yeah you see all the rivers are restored all this water you see where jovier had in the past broken the continent the land grows back up and new beautiful streams and lakes appear and a corrillo looks impressed

you like that yeah i like it i like it a lot actually

maybe like another maybe we can go check him out tonight maybe we'll check out like a lake or whatever.

Oh, hang on, my lake.

You ever been to a swamp before?

I know.

You're mostly like an ocean gal.

It's been a minute.

I wouldn't mind.

Callie, how does Marigold feel the Fae with her power?

Um, I think Marigold is just gonna do a nice controlled burn of the things that no longer serve the Fae.

So I think she's gonna go around, and the things that need to be cleared away for new things to grow

is what she's gonna just gently burn away and let those fertile ashes become something great yeah so marigold goes around and i'll say maybe we reverse the order a little bit so marigold goes first and kind of burns away all the things that need to be burned away and then honeysuckle goes through and brings up the new soil and then licorice waters it and you guys see lush landscapes below you

giant trees spring out of the ground as quick as the serpents fly over them creating forests and rivers and lakes and mountains mountains.

It looks like a combination of the Fae Wild and the Beastlands.

You see giant beasts start rearing their heads.

Saul kicks a basilisk.

Yeah.

You want to give me a constitution to say they're real quick.

It's a 16.

Okay, you pass.

Oh, okay.

Saul knocks out the basilisk.

But you guys see that cities as well and towns that had been razed by raiders in the past few months suddenly become incorporated into the natural landscape.

You see, like beautiful tree cities, and you also see new settlements and towns.

And you guys look around after having taken this strange, magical trip around the Fey Wild atop the serpents.

The planet looks safe now, but you look up into the sky and see that it is blank.

There is this barrier of magic that is protecting the planet from the night skies.

You've got this beautiful landscape, but no sky.

I look at the serpents.

Another skyless night.

Thought I'd seen all those I would.

It might be time for you three to return to your mom.

Oh, wait a minute.

I pull out the vial.

Um, can I inspect it?

Is it changed?

Does it look different?

It looks like a little galaxy in a vial.

Oh.

I think Swag gave this to me.

in our vision, but I think...

I think now's the time to open it.

Okay.

Pop that top.

Let's see what's in there.

I'm gonna

hold it out pretty far.

Okay.

Yeah, not sure what's gonna happen.

And I uncork it.

You uncork it, and you see stars begin pouring out, and

the serpents look like they're ready to go on a trip.

Wow, wow.

There's

a lot of space out there and a lot of threats.

And we need you to be on the lookout.

Can you do that for us?

You see,

Licorice turns to you, Saul, gives you a little nod.

See Honeysuckle.

Rom,

nuzzles into Calder.

Marigold wraps around Syrah and Calliope.

I think that's fine.

I'll let them.

They've had the whole story together.

She can just be able to see

as you try to leave to just give her a moment with Syrah, grabs you and pulls you in next to Syrah and

wraps you both around

and you see Foster hops on top of the serpent and goes

see Ollie joins him

say essentially one last ride okay yeah let's see them off let's do it I think I think before it all ends I I do just want to say a special goodbye though to Licorice because that's who I started everything with.

Yeah.

So I think I just want to like

hug him around his neck and just say thank you for

starting me on this really unexpected journey.

Licorice

wraps around you

and three of you take off.

Kenna on the back of Honeysuckle as well and Cyrus there on the back of Marigold.

You guys leap up into the sky and crash through the barrier and you see you are covered in protective magic that lets you travel beyond the planet.

Out here you see asteroids and dead stars and chaos from Juvir's careless magic, but as Saul's vial leaks into the atmosphere, you see the sky of the Beastlands takes over and you see this giant galactic swag.

And using his monk abilities, begins to move at light speed, shuffling the sky, placing stars and moons and planets back in their proper place.

Now that's knitting.

You see galactic swag gives you a wink, Saul.

You guys see the planet of Bahumia below you, the Fey Wild Material Plain and Shadowfell all glowing and swirling with green and blue and black energy.

And beyond it, you see this endless sea of stars.

And now an eerie calm sets in as everything settles.

And as it does, you see a constellation takes shape, that of the Serpent Queen.

And you see, the Serpent Queen looks out at all of you and goes,

Thank you for bringing them home.

We wouldn't be here without them.

Honestly, they

brought themselves home.

You've got quite spirited children.

Yeah.

Rom, rom, rom.

You see,

the serpent queen looks proudly at all of her children.

The prophecy has unfolded.

Perhaps not in the way we originally thought.

But the wild lives on.

Come, my children.

It is time to go.

You see,

Marigold, Honeysuckle, and Lacrish

glow with starfire.

Give you guys all little head bumps.

You see, Syrah is completely exhausted, but has come to enough and is crying as she sees Marigold start to become incorporeal, but she was alone before, and

now she has her sister again.

So you see she pets Marigold with one hand and holds Callie's hand with the other.

She's gonna be forever in the sky whenever you want to look at her, and I'm not going anywhere.

Sarah just goes, shut up, you poetic idiot.

And just brings you in and gives you a hug and cries.

I hug, wrestle her.

Yeah, you guys start wrestling.

And you see they disappear briefly and then incorporate into the night sky behind the Serpent Queen.

As they disappear, I cast Featherfall so that we fall from outer space.

Yeah, okay.

So you guys, as you guys begin to fall back,

you hear the Serpent Queen goes,

And one last thing.

Obron was aware of the risk of becoming involved in mortal affairs.

He has asked me to honor his debts.

And Callie,

you guys are in the void of space here.

There's no air, but you suddenly feel a soft wind

and smell the scent of spearmint and tea leaves.

And you see your mother, Oleana, a living constellation, appears before you.

Syrah, that's her.

Do you smell it?

Syrah nods.

You see your mother runs over and gives you guys a hug and she feels she feels real.

She goes, my girls,

I didn't think I'd ever see you again.

Yeah, I didn't think I'd see you either.

But this is gonna be goodbye, right?

Yeah, you see.

Do you feel at peace?

As you ask that, you look into your mother's eyes, and usually she'd have this kind of, especially in the last

you know, decade of her life or so, she always had kind of a far-off look, like she was thinking of of somewhere else.

She was seeing future, so she could never truly live in the moment.

But as you ask that, you see she is present right now for the first time.

And she goes,

I don't know.

I finally don't know.

Yes.

Yes,

I think so.

And she nods excitedly.

I have...

No idea what will happen next.

I have no idea.

And I'm so excited.

She hugs you both in tight

and touches both your shoulders and goes.

I spent my life searching

for the right ending.

I have seen death.

I've seen all the paths to withering.

But now I get to watch you bloom.

Thank you, Calliope.

Thank you, Sarah.

I'll miss you a lot.

I'll miss you, my dear.

Alright, well, Syrah, I guess it's time to get blooming.

You see, Sarah goes, yeah, I guess it's time to get blooming.

Oh, Syrah, just let it out.

Your lip is trembling.

Fucking fine.

I love it.

She just starts crying.

She goes, I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

Brings you both in.

And your mother goes, Goodbye, my loves.

I hope we can see each other again someday.

Do you think we might?

Does the universe work like that?

You see,

she looks around at all of the endless stars,

and

your mother shakes her head and goes,

I

can't be sure anymore, but I think so.

Okay.

Well, we'll give you a good show until then.

She smiles, and you see Swag, the Serpent Queen, and Onlyana walk off into the stars, and you all begin floating back to Bahomia under the watchful gaze of the Serpent Queen reunited with her children.

No matter what you've heard,

you're everything I dreamed you'd be.

A miracle to me.

They don't get to tell you what you're worth.

Darling,

you're native to the night.

So take these wings I gave you and take

flight.

Don't ever be ashamed of your claws, your bite, your strength.

They don't care to tell you who you

are.

Honey,

don't ever change a thing.

Your fire breath, your many heads, your poison serpent sting

just because

they're afraid doesn't mean that you have strayed.

They don't even get to have it say.

I

can

not

give you their love,

But I can make you strong and brave And I can make you tough

Their swords and arrows cannot pierce the height of one so proud, so fierce

They don't get to tell you who you

are

They tell you you're a prophecy

But you're a possibility

They don't get

to tell you what to be.

And let them write their histories,

clinging to their legacies.

You and me, we know just what we're worth.

And with that, we will cut to

one year later.

Ooh, whoa.

Saul.

What have you been doing one year after the adventure?

Wow.

Well, I think for the past year,

I've probably just been, you know, traveling around with Duck Team as much as we're allowed to, seeing places we didn't get to see.

I think I probably

have been helping Albin out by essentially going across the world and looking for talented youths that maybe don't have a chance or grew up in a place like the water park without um parents or yeah opportunity and i recruit them and i i take them to albies academy yeah

so we catch up with saul who is the adjunct professor of martial arts at albies academy in esri it is a publicly funded school that offers education and housing to the youth around behumia and saul you stand in front of a classroom of excited students many of whom you recognize as the little animal pals from the water park.

Oh, what do you think you're teaching them today?

I think I...

They're all excitedly talking in the classroom, and then I backflip in through the door.

Cool teacher.

And land on the desk and say, listen up.

You may not be the most magically talented, but there's magic in all of us.

There is a magic you can harness, but to harness it, you can't use your strength.

You have to use your mind.

you have to find the inner focus.

And that is why today we're going to be making potholders.

You see, all of the kids look really confused, then really excited, then really confused again, and then really excited.

And they all start freaking out about getting to make potholders.

There's a portrait of Albin up in the room.

Albin's up there.

You see, he looks like surprised that you took the picture, and it's just a really bad picture of him.

I have the same thought.

Yeah, he looks confused.

Yeah.

He moved when they took it, and they hung it up anyway.

But yeah, Albin's been teaching other classes and you've been teaching this one.

You see, as you finish up the class, you see the students file out.

But as they do, you see a dwarven knight from Iron Deep enters.

You see she wears a tabard with a hammer on it over her plate mail.

So Buffo.

It's about time I tracked you down.

Sir Ironborn.

Yeah,

it is me.

You see, she removes her helm, but I'm actually going by Sir Kenna Crooked now.

And yes.

And yes, I am a knight.

And yes, I do have a girlfriend now.

Cheer for her class.

You see the kids cheer.

They're all holding pictures.

Is it holding so it's really muffled?

They take notes.

This is how you do it, huh?

This was my first student.

You see, they all look really excited to grow up to be Kenna.

Yeah, you see, Kenna looks really strong.

Has been training hard this past year and looks like a strong warrior.

What brings you here?

It's been some word for Bosbodia that some cultists are trying to bring in some roke gods and putting together a team.

I slap my hand on her pauldron and say, say the word.

They really don't need me around here.

There's like a lot of other teachers that are way more qualified.

Yeah.

She looks around at you forcing all these kids to make potholders.

And she goes like, all right, we can teleport to the next place.

my girlfriend is a wizard she gave me a spell scroll because she's my girlfriend that's cool as hell yeah you see uh kenna brings you in then opens up a scroll and you

disappear as you hear albin go Saul, Saul, wait.

Are you?

You need to tell us if you're going to be absent.

Put on a movie.

God damn it.

It's all right, everyone.

We're watching.

I don't know.

Babe.

We're going to watch Babe 2.

Pig in the city.

All the kids freak out.

They're so excited.

It's so tragic.

The kids are going to be crying.

Oh, shit.

And then we cut to Calder.

What are you doing one year after the adventure?

Okay.

So I think Calder left his hometown with a chip on his shoulder, but now

he's coming back having nothing to prove.

And he moved into Boris Frigg's lake house.

Oh, so sick.

And he's been slowly but surely fixing it back up, using his hands um ice skating on the lake in the morning yeah coach gordon bombay style at the end of mighty ducks so you are out um

on the deck of boris friggs lake house uh you're out here with your brothers you're sharing a beer they all kind of toast to you it's been a year now things are

less weird with Gowan now.

You see Gregor has kind of come into his own as the Ranger general and Gowan's, you know, taking a bit of an ego check and is learning to take orders and whatnot.

So, you guys are all hanging out and just kind of messing around with each other.

And Gregor goes, You still talking to that, uh, that girl, Tris 2?

Or, hey, don't call her that girl.

That's that's my girlfriend.

Well, she doesn't call herself my girlfriend, but that's what I call her

to you guys and not in front of her.

Because she doesn't like labels, asshole.

Gregor just goes, you know, I know you don't want to take my advice or anything, but maybe

I don't know if she's the one, is all I'm saying.

Like, I don't know if she's the one.

Dude, now you sound like her.

Come on.

As you guys are talking about your situationship with Trist too.

Your long-distance situationship between the two, because she lives in the Fay Wild.

But I live right near the gate.

Yeah, no, you do live right near the gate.

Every once in a while, she comes and visits and just brings so much drama to the ice night.

She's actually very popular because the Fey Wild has such a higher capacity for drama than the real plan.

Yeah, yeah, she brings the iced tea.

Yeah.

So you guys are enjoying this night.

And then

you suddenly see two figures appear out on the ice.

Calder!

Hey, Calder.

We got rogue gods.

Calder.

Yeah.

Yep.

Hey, come up here.

I put a team together.

Okay, all right.

You see?

Yep.

They walk the long way.

This isn't perfectly exact.

Sorry.

My girlfriend.

I was going to shovel down there.

Did you say girlfriend?

Yeah, yeah.

Sorry, I know.

Bring it in.

Yep.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, I guess we've all got girlfriends now, huh?

Damn, do we all have girlfriends?

Yeah, we all might have girlfriends.

Kenna comes in, gives you guys a hug, and she looks up at you, Calder, and goes, sorry to disturb you, but we're we're putting a team together.

There's rumors that cultists are trying to summon one of the rogue gods.

And we're wondering if you were interested in getting the old team back together.

Wow, yeah, yeah.

I just have to check with my girlfriend.

You know what?

No.

No.

She wouldn't check with me.

Are you and your girlfriend totally monogamous?

Or is it like a monogamish thing?

We're just, yeah, we're monogamous, but, you know, whatever you were to.

I'm going to come with you guys for sure.

You see, your brothers cheers you, kind of mess up your hair, send you along, and you guys

teleport away.

No parties while I'm gone.

You see, Gregor is already taking the door off to make it a beer pong table.

No, I just fixed that.

And then we are going to cut to the Fae Wild, where things look...

quite different than they did a year ago.

This has been a time of rebuilding.

There is a new Fae Republic.

Some of our old friends have become representatives, including Coralil, Basalt, Garash, Zunark, the Young Stag.

The Automatons were able to collect the shattered pieces of the old crown and gained their autonomy and are traveling with Bare Lane.

The new leaders have worked to continue what You and the Serpent started: sustainable cities that incorporate nature while also protecting humanoids from the beasts that inhabit the forests.

And Syra Igni has sort of redirected her anger into a passion and is now a traveling ambassador that works on deals between beasts and humanoids after all of her experience with marigold.

But today she is visiting her sister, Calliope.

And Calliope, what are you doing?

So obviously, I think I've spent the past year, I've stayed in the Fae Wild, and I think that, you know, one of my priorities has been like creating a new relationship with Syrah, you know, outside of the sibling dynamics that um mother put on us but actually I think that what Calliope's done is she's started a traveling theater troupe

that traverses the Fae Wild with a caravan of wagons

telling stories of the material plane and the three unexpected heroes Colder Kilde, Sol Bufo

and Maeve Haypenny.

Wow.

Maeve Haypenny being the Eladron that tragically died in the battle.

Oh my god.

Wow.

With Joe Fear.

Okay.

So I think I'm like backstage.

I'm like whipping everyone up, ready for a show.

I'm like pointing at someone being like, okay, your soul.

Your soul tonight.

All right.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah.

Is this good enough?

It's just the voice right?

Yeah.

The voice is right, but there's like a general air of like, you want to be cute, but you're cursed with being hot.

All right.

Ah.

yes, that's it.

Yeah.

And you, you're colder, so the way I've written it, you have kind of like an on-again and off-again thing with Princess Shibberblight.

All right, yeah.

Okay, so I

am like sleeping with this dragon.

It's complicated because you've like pledged yourself to her, but now like personal and the professional

and mudsy.

It's hot and cold.

We can't.

Yeah, we can't ever be together, even though we want to be so bad.

Yeah, yeah.

I understand.

Yeah, you see, this tall Eladron man in like a bad theater troop beard nods and takes the note.

And you see Syrah visits you backstage.

You see she kind of crosses her arms and looks around and goes, it's a bit pedestrian, but you know, it's good for what it is.

You're going broad.

I like that.

I get that.

You know, I'm just trying to appeal to as many people as possible.

The way we think of it is like a fun service.

Yeah, broad.

You do politics, I do entertainment.

Okay?

Okay.

Both are not that different.

I know my limitations and I belong on the stage, not the political stage.

Anyways, this is what, your 17th time seeing it?

Yeah.

And I'm still waiting for myself to pop up.

Where's Maeve Haypenny's sister?

Maeve Haypenney was an only child, and that was part of her tragedy.

Okay, yeah.

She's really beautiful, but also really hot, and no one notices the former, and she's an only child.

She's really beautiful, but also really hot yeah despite being beautiful she's also hot exactly all right yeah so you hear the piano starts on the opening song and you hear there once was a beautiful eladron but she was cursed with being hot

i've written two characters that are cursed with being hot well no i'm cute but hot you want to be cute i want to be cute but i'm hot right

uh you rush out on the stage You do the show.

I don't play myself.

You don't play yourself.

You just play it.

No, another Eladron named Summer the Autumn Eladron plays Maeve.

There she is.

Cool.

Is that you?

You don't know.

Okay, so Callie disappears for an unknown amount of time.

goes and plays Maeve Haypainting, maybe, or maybe Summer the Autumn Eladron.

We don't know.

Saul, Calder, and Kenna appear, and you watch this show.

Oh my God, there's an imperfect soul clone.

What a skate from mothership!

Stand back, everyone!

What's going on between that guy and the dragon?

There's a...

There's such a lot.

Like, most of the show is the relationship between Princess Shiverbite and Calder Gilday.

Yeah, this is, this is libelous.

What if my, what if, what if Tris saw this?

She might not even care.

You see, Calder, yeah, turns away from this kind of poorly made costumed dragon and goes, I can't sleep with you, even though I want to so badly.

And I think about it literally all of the time.

Is this a first draft?

I'm

mouthing along with every word.

Eventually,

the show ends with, of course, Princess Shiver Blight and Calder getting together.

They share a passionate kiss on stage over Mayfinni's dead body.

As Saul, as the fake Saul cries hotly, not cutely.

Yeah, you see the crowd gives it a standing ovation.

I say always to.

And Syrah stands up and cheers along with you.

And Callie, as you come out to do your bows, you see Calder and Saul and Kenna in the crowd.

And I'm mouthing, what was that?

Callie, is that my mouth back?

Calder nods.

I gesture backstage.

Yeah.

You guys all go backstage.

I come backstage and I have so many flowers, so many armfuls of flowers.

Wow.

But it's clear that I just made them.

I wanted you guys to think I'm killing them.

I'm wearing a Maeve Haypenny t-shirt.

I bought this up front.

Is that really what you think it is?

It says Maverick, like Maverick, but spelled like Maeve.

Insane.

Yeah, you see Kenna goes up and goes, we're putting the team.

What are you doing here?

Did you just come to see the show?

Sorry, if only it were that simple.

Oh, okay.

Which are really hard to get tickets, actually.

Also, Kenna, I'm sorry you're not on the show, but you just want of an age.

I could give you a sex scene.

And everyone in the show needed to have like.

Sure, yeah, no, there was a lot of that.

So I just kind of wrote you out to not have to deal with it.

Right, of course.

That makes a lot of sense.

That's really erotic.

I just want you to know that I do have a girlfriend, though.

So just so everyone knows.

Yeah.

Just so everyone knows.

Anyway, I'm putting a team together.

You're putting a team together?

Yeah.

That sounds pretty official.

Yeah, you might say, I'm on knightly business.

I bend the knee.

Shit, was I supposed to do that?

How can I help you?

Well, General Broadsbeard's dispatched me to put together a team of knights, aka my peers, to travel to Osmodia and find out about cultists that are trying to bring in rogue gods.

Hmm.

I don't hate the idea of adding a scene in Osmodia to my play.

How's your understudy these days?

Honestly, everyone's really good.

Oh, that's good.

Gray Wilde is just lousy with good performers.

That's how you felt about the calder?

Yeah.

You see, there's an Eladron nearby that is watching Calliope and overhearing that you might leave and look so excited.

I give her a thumbs up.

Oh, oh my god, I'm gonna miss you so much.

Yes.

I'm gonna miss you so much.

Yeah, don't rush back.

She hates me and I love it.

Saul giggles hotly.

And you guys see Foster was in the show playing himself, bottles out.

Foster, what do you think about just taking on another job?

A little adventure just to fill the creative cup.

Whirl!

Hops up onto your shoulder.

All right, Kenna.

Looks like we're in.

Let's go.

You guys ready for

Wedbor Adventure?

You see, she takes all your hands, makes a little circle, and pulls out her last teleport scroll.

I lean over to Calder and I say, by the way, Princess Shiverblight has come and seen the play, and she loves it.

Oh my god, am I in a love triangle?

Duck team disappears into the wind, off

on their next adventure.

And that's where we'll end our campaign.

Oh my gosh.

Woo!

What a nice wow ending for all of our old friends.

Small though he was, the way that he loved was enormous.

Stature be damned, he was two times the man that a giant

was.

Met him down in Iron Deep, a sailor of sky and sheet.

Navigated expertly her every last giant lead.

Never before had a lover performed like this Tor Death Force.

Titans and ogres rendered mediocre by this tall dwarf.

Small folk, big fun,

sure afoot, hard one,

giant

leather

like

no other.

Think of quad calls so

hard, his

eyes be lies

a huge surprise.

So she waits by windowside, dreaming of his return.

Never to be satisfied, inside her his memory burns.

Small folk take he, this tall dwarf has placed with enormity.

A small folk she met, but a titan she wept for when heart won land.

It's the end of our show and the end of our campaign, which means it's time to give an extremely special shout out to all of our elders.

Thank you so much.

This would not be possible without you.

Brad D, Jeffrey S., Lord of the Fjord, Later McSkater, Matt M, Cutter W, Jeff C, Daniel G, Danielle the Dastardly Dame, Carpe Liam, Bryant, the DM Consort, Victor T, aka Balnor's Boy, Hoyt's friend, Justin I, Danny Danster, TJM, Tre Lee the Cray, Christopher B.

Damiel R.

Jordan L, Cyborg version of Josh the Kobald, Tar Gott, Stevie Waggs, Hellish Rebuker, Ph.D.,

Princess Yar, Jory S, Rachel from Animorphs, Ah, watch out!

Jack L, Nicholas C, star of every film ever made in Bohumia, Mike H., Elka Smeltzer Plus, Great Value Jimma, Tyler F, Hurradrian, Carborough Chapel Hill FPV,

Rex Thaniel, The White, Cece Lulu, Old Cobb's Duncle, Older Burn, Hercules Poirot, Zerabit Folk Detective, Timmy R.

Rico, Calder Comes Cold, Shoutout to the Cold Com companions, Frosty Facial.

Taylor B, Maybe the real treasure was the friends we made along the way.

Maybe, Taylor B.

Cass Strong Grinch, Steven, Jack Tiger, Amork Ol C,

Mike K, Nick W.

William W.

Big Bad Beardo the Mad, Eric McD, Ananarama,

Percival Frederickson von Mussel, Klasowski Derolo III, Jay Dragonborn, Guardian of the Vibe, honoring the cock,

Ambrosia Honeysuckle, Ben A.

Dave H, Dustin S.

Danny F, Hawkeye Pierce, Book Vars Assistant, Izzy F, Big Bad John, DPC is awesome, hashtag honor the cock, Shoan, the shade tree mechanic of Zobal Dar, Summer Rose, aka Grantaire, Cat C, Misa of House in Zunza, Ariel, the occasional mermaid, Selena N, aka Felaciraptor, B.

Perky always,

Pat L, Maxwell J.

Lauren H.

Serve16, Annie, the Faywild Therapist, Connor S.

Salil, BioQuirt 7, Amber Dextrous, Bean Rat Was Innocent, Drub Hobdropper, Jack Hubert, King of the Mole People under Iron Deep, dressed in blue and fighting his way through a bracket-style tournament, Valen, Paj, the bitch and bunny board.

Carlin C.

Noah the Bullywog Boy, hashtag honor the cock,

James G, Everything Bago the Eladron who just wants to hang out with his pet badger Stripey Daddy Master Dandy Reverend Chatterbones Han

Eric B Marcos Learns the Balanced Druid Frida M.

Pagos Self-Proclaimed Fae King now with real musical improv action.

Hiya!

Maggie Holly the green laughing hyena finally caught up to duck team akash T, Cal, just Cal.

Aaron B.

Russell H, a monk named Dilgo.

Yes, the whole thing, yes, every time.

Cody C, Lorelei the succubi, and Kira the succulent snack.

McKinna S.

Your friendly neighborhood yaunt and yunkle, Andrew and Sid.

John Adams, didn't win the vote, but won your heart.

Meg, the male carrier of Bahumia.

James F, Austin S.

Wayfarer now has to do something with the trolls.

To get rid of them, turn to page 42.

To keep them, turn to page 69.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Shane C.

Barbo, Good Barrel, Bard Barian, Welshlander, Garrett G aka 1 big curd, Renee, the monster captain, Box Clifton, Olivia the Enchanting Bard, and Jared the soap opera cleric, who are playing sticker to the man down with the monarchy.

Winter Slade, Fico, Garrett the Artificer, Damon J, Anthony the raddest of dudes, Jay!

The fairies have amended all their ways and are volunteering at their local petting zoo.

Wow, you love to see it.

Cantrip Dumbledore, the bare onesie-wearing barbarian, Lexi H., Roger L., Nodrog, the pacifist barbarian, Gino T, Jan Luca, Tristan the talentless hunk, Shananigan Joel Connor, Mios the Great, Joshua S.

Alexander, Linz W.

Johnny Dude K,

Pavu Eskenor, the Goliath Paladin providing service with a smile, Tim M.,

a cat napping in a sunbeam, listening to a podcast.

MLG Cheeto,

Shel B., Kenna's first favorite sprite girl.

Thanks to the two crew for a gorgeous campaign three.

Now Kenna, go get your girl.

Amen.

Jackson R.

Snailus, who's infecting Worcester for within.

Captain Morgan, Pirate Wizard.

Papa Scades.

Mima Scades.

Megan N.

Anthony B.

Savannah H.

Balnor's best friend.

Steve.

Stephanie of House in Zunsa.

Benjamin A.

Gimli the Corgi, Papa and Foster's canine friend.

Mikel A.

Josh Hole, pilot of the Nightmare Verse Flight.

Froky, The two crew, Blue Through, Jennery, Ethan the Mailman, Maple the Shy Bookworm, Ashasaurus, Seth E., Billy Batson, Tori the tungsten dragoose, Michael L.S.

II,

Jacob the Purveyor of Shenanigans, Carl B., Plumber of the Realm, Dex Riddlewell, Hannah A.

Ra,

Ace Dreggs, High Lord of Critzburg, Darius Davis, the guy from That One Thing.

Troy's Mom, Vin Diagram.

GKC, Teegy, Teegy.

Cadmilius, the Consumed.

Bard of Holding.

Clinton P.

Grinchful Cam, the Grinch Frogman.

Dean, Jake W.

Hi Mom.

Tuesday Cross, the choose your own adventure writer, not the porn star.

Steve L.

Alex G.

Zibidabachery.

Nicole, Katarina C.

And Lady Jacqueline P.

of Castle Whitestone.

Ah, thank you all so, so much, elders.

It's been a wonderful campaign, and you have made it so.

Thanks so, so much.

We'll see you here again real soon.

It's been a pleasure.

Goodbye.

That was a headgum podcast.