C3 Ep. 69: Siege at Summer Court Castle (A Faerie Tale Ending)

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Welcome to the campaign after the campaign.

This is not another DD podcast.

welcome back to bohumi everybody

yeah

i want to roll the off mic that's on

murph loved it off mic so he needed to bring it on like

it

absolutely crushed in the studio he just had like the cutest most joyful response when we needed to make sure the audience got to see the soft gentleman it tickled merv so much you just giggled i've never heard you giggle like that when we're doing

a giant

nothing nothing annoys me more than jokes during the audio tests because in five seconds we will be on mic trying to entertain people and in that moment we need to make sure the audio levels are good there's no better way to make sure the levels are good with them by getting you pissed off that is true it gets a really good diverse range of audio well you know what we can hang a little bit loose today because, guess what?

It's episode 69.

Really?

Yeah, good old-fashioned suck and suck.

I'm going to try to get laid.

So, what?

Is that out of nowhere?

Maybe.

I mean, my whole character thing is like, oh, I'm like addicted to love, and now I'm discovering I don't even need it.

Right, but maybe you'll, yeah, just decide you need a 60-year-old.

It would be so good if you dropped the non-detection just so that

the link could watch it.

wow right just to get in like a tinder radius or something

all right we actually probably should have gotten this out during the audio test

let's um i am your dungeon master brian murphy joined by jake howitz cupped up and i sucked

what the hell was that

good god so good

oh my god

all right yeah if you're intimidated by that i hate to find out what your rhyme is.

Emily Axford.

Don't you dare say cuffed up.

You can.

Don't you dare say it.

She cannot.

Cuffed up and I saw it.

Oh, my God.

Calliope.

Calliope, Petracup.

Calliope.

You guys do that.

Yeah, Petra Cup.

I was going to say binded or something.

Yeah, the more times we can say cup in the name, the funnier it is.

And then we've got Cupwell Tanner.

Oh, you cucked me off at the pass with that one.

God damn it.

Cupped up, ready to fuck.

Yeah.

Getting little kisses from a fish.

Remember, you started this.

I did not.

You said it was episode 69.

You invited this energy.

You all have fun.

Seconded.

You're not allowed to have any fun.

We'll take it too far.

Don't give us an inch.

Yeah, you're right.

Should have yelled at you all.

All right.

Let's go ahead ahead and do a little recap.

So last time, you passed out in the Shadowfell Sea, only to be awoken in a vampire's lair.

The Baron, Archibald Stunch, revealed that he had fished you out of the water as he prepared to make a meal of you.

But just as he went to bite Saul, Albin and Mob Goblin burst through a wall and made the save, allowing you enough time to beat up a few vampires and escape onto the airship.

Albin caught you up on everything that had happened and you were horrified to learn that you had been in captivity for two days.

You then went down to Mob Goblin to ask her if she could alter some cuffs you stole from the vampires into something you could use against the Fate Bringers.

As she studied the item, you caught up on headlines from around the Fae Wild and learned that Jovere was spreading propaganda about Syrah.

Callie's sister was being portrayed as a harbinger of the apocalypse sent by Oberon to destroy the Fae.

Kind of actually cool though.

Kind of actually rad.

Eventually, the airship reached the rift to the Fae Wild, and Mob goblin took you to garash's castle in the sky there garash reassured you that sire wouldn't be killed and joe until jove was crowned high queen he also theorized that marigold was more likely to be charmed than killed outright in order to rescue them you'll need allies so garash gave you a rundown of possibilities they include bare lane and the automatons charbin and the empire and a force of sealy knights who had holed themselves up in the summer court castle currently being besieged by Jovere's forces.

They, unlike a majority of the Seeley court, had not declared for Jove when Cyrilla died.

But before anything else, Garash urged you to visit the Beastlands to request the full might of the serpents.

You traveled there via Flower, where you found the Serpent Queen raging through the sky.

After reassuring her that you'd get her daughter back, she came back with a proposition.

If you were to unleash the full power of Honeysuckle and Licorice, you would need to bind your lives to them.

Saul bonded to Licorice, Calder bonded to Honeysuckle, and Callie bonded to the missing marigold.

Once bonded, the serpent queen looked on you as her children and told you to go get your sister back.

And that's where we are now.

All right.

Okay, so you are on this endless plane of stars speaking to the serpent queen, and then

the night turns to day, and you are back in the Fae Wild, flying through the clouds atop your serpents.

Saul, you are on Licorice, this enormous silver serpent, slolloming quickly through the sky like a snake through water.

Calder, you are atop honeysuckle who doesn't fly in the traditional sense, but seems to warp gravity to jump through the sky.

He's essentially doing like a video game seismic double jump every time he moves.

So just jumping up, and you feel like pockets of air kind of exploding out as he rides.

That's so cool.

The forbidden frog technique, the double jump.

This is awesome.

Yes.

Yeah, so Calder, you're kind of like you're on a mechanical bull or something, getting bucked around as Honeysuckle like jumps up through the sky, much less graceful than Licorice, to say the least.

And in fact, Callie, as you are like falling, because the sky suddenly released,

you feel Honeysuckle takes you in with a gravitational pull and you are flung onto the back of his enormous bronze scales.

So he's got like a gravitational pull around him.

Seems like he has some skill that allows him to do that.

And Ligorish swoops down out of the clouds,

seems to have something similar to Saul's step of the wind, and flies down.

You feel him go even faster than he was going, darts down, and catches Kenna as you all make your way to Garash's castle.

Can I hold Foster up in the air and be like, have you ever been this high in the sky before?

No, you haven't, have you?

Shaking his head, feeling the wind in his feathers.

Yeah, you see making himself really big, holding his wings out, and his eyes are glowing red.

And you feel power radiating from Foster.

We've got a roller coaster kid on our heads.

And I think you'll feel better if you keep your eyes open.

Yeah, no.

They're tearing up.

They're tearing up.

I think I'll just, I prefer being on the ground to be perfectly frank.

You've got to have some goggles in that backpack.

Oh.

True, too true.

Been too long since I was down at the Bides.

He starts fishing through them, puts on these giant goggles that make her eyes enormous.

She looks around in wonder.

Do I look cool?

Yeah, you do.

You look adorable.

She definitely doesn't look cool, but she does look adorable.

As you guys pull up to the cloudy gates of Garasha's castle, you see Albin lying just in the courtyard.

His clothing is just burnt by Starfire, and he looks all fucked up.

And he just looks up.

I was dead.

What?

I was dead.

I felt like Starfire just pulled pulled me apart.

Really?

Wow.

Yes.

She disintegrated you.

Yes, I think so.

I think I died.

Are you alright?

I don't know.

Okay, I'm going to lay on.

I've been going to town on that bug bite, buddy.

Yeah, you see a giant mosquito bite on its neck?

It's pulsating.

Maybe it was just like a starfire disinfectant.

Maybe.

Yes, I don't know.

The bug bite's still there, though.

Does it look bad?

You see it?

It looks like an alien-style chest burster just moving in his neck.

Oh, God, it's implanted eggs in you for sure.

I'm going to put my hand on this clearly like a mosquito egg sack and Castleon hands.

This is absolutely disgusting, but you see through his like translucent flared skin there, a mosquito the size of like a small dog is

about to burst out.

You see it shrivels up and goes down and then the giant bite on his neck flattens and he looks normal.

And you see his skin kind of turns to its normal color and he stops sweating and he goes, oh, thank you.

Thank you.

I think we just potentially nipped an invasive species in the box.

Yeah, you see Albin kind of gets a grip on his surroundings and then looks up.

Holy shit, those things are incredible.

Yeah, I feel like they've been powered up by the bond we have with them.

They look incredible, don't they?

Yes, as you say that, you see magical birds, the ones that were like kind of flocking to Garasha's castle up here, begin flying around the serpents and flying around you guys as you kind of like land in this courtyard.

And Callie, you see a fiery phoenix kind of flies by, gives you a long look, and then

turns to steam as if to kind of give you a sign.

Oh, I thought that bird was trying to hit on you for a second, but I think they're going to go send a message to Syrah.

Yeah, I think so too.

Oh, that's a huge relief.

Um, how do you two feel?

Like riding these beasts that you're connected with?

You both look so natural.

Do you feel like do you feel different inside?

It feels great.

I mean, I've seen you two ride on the serpents, and I was, you know, always a little jealous.

And it's

everything I hoped it would be.

That's great.

It feels incredible.

I feel powerful.

And

more than that, I feel ready.

to go and get Syrah to get Marigold back.

Yeah.

Can you do what they can do?

Is it that kind of bond?

Calder, can you jump fly?

Calder jumps off of Honeysuckle.

Let's see.

Calder quickly disappears through the clouds.

No!

No, I can't!

Featherfall!

I said Featherfall!

He's not like that!

He knows how to Misty Step.

He needs to learn.

He's still gonna fall tens of thousands of feet.

The spell will probably wear off before he hits the ground.

Guaranteed death.

However, Honeysuckle uses one of his new skills, which is a reaction, which is gravitational pull.

Honeysuckle can pull or fling an ally 80 feet towards or away from him as a reaction.

This movement does not provoke opportunity attacks.

So you see he

pulls back Calder with his gravitational pull onto Honeysuckle's back.

The answer to your question is no.

Let me pass out.

I've got papers.

If you want to pass Licorice down to Saul,

M, you can look at Honeysuckle here.

And Jake, I will share Honeysuckle in the chat.

Oh my gosh.

Oh, my God.

Oh, I can infuse Key into Licorice to let him do stuff.

Hell yeah.

Yeah, so let me go ahead.

I'll give you guys a rundown.

So Licorice has a little bit more power, does bigger attacks, but a little bit less AC, has 21 AC, 397 hit points, has a bite, a slam attack, and a tail attack, and can do star fire breath, which potentially does 16 D10 fire damage.

Has two bonus actions.

Step of the Wind.

Saul can spend two key points to give Licorice Step of the Wind to do the disengage or dash as a bonus action.

So Licorice is fast as fuck.

You can also do a rapid recharge.

Saul can spend three key points to attempt to re-roll Licorice's breath weapon die.

After this ability recharges it, can't be used again until after a long rest.

So usually recharges on a five or six.

Saul could potentially re-roll that and get like two breath weapons in a row

honeysuckle on the other hand has a lot more armor class and hp ac 24 hp 444 yeah

has uh like licorice a bite slam and tail attack and does an earthquake attack can potentially do 15 d8 of bludgeoning damage uh basically burrows into the earth and causes a terrible earthquake and then has a reaction gravitational pull honeysuckle can pull or fling an ally 80 feet towards or away from him as a reaction.

Uh, we already talked about that, and then twin action surge.

When Calder uses action surge, honeysuckle also gets an action.

These

are incredible.

Should the two of you fight right now to sort of like playtest this?

Right, yeah, we should probably just like spar a little bit.

Please don't.

No more serpent violence for now.

Please.

Wait, yeah, Albin, when you died, did you see anything?

Yes, fire.

Just fire.

Okay.

Fire and then darkness.

The empire.

I don't know.

Do you feel like you've been blessed by the serpent queen as well?

No, I feel like I'm not.

I feel like I got my ass kicked.

Yeah, I feel like I absolutely got my ass kicked.

It felt like a mosquito was going to be born out of my neck.

Yeah, yeah, sort of like getting hit on two different fronts.

There was nothing good about that.

I know you all had a majestic time, and mine was just bad.

Right, that was really zero out of ten.

What do you need to get back to a place that you're happy with?

I...

This will take me weeks to overcome.

Long after this adventure finishes, I will be thinking of the egg sack that was in my neck.

You won't be thinking of how Kelly saved you.

I mean, ultimately, you've had a good day.

See, he drops to his knees and begins throwing up mosquito eggs the size of chicken eggs.

Oh no, they're still there.

Oh, my God.

I lay on hand.

Give me a second.

Oh, my God.

Other more.

Adder more.

You have to kill me.

You have to kill me.

Alvin, I'm sorry for how gross this is.

Saul starts eating the eggs.

Wow.

No.

Alvin starts throwing up more and just more mosquito eggs.

Wait, this is so symbiotic that you're friends with.

You guys see as you try to help Alvin out,

Karash comes out of the castle and addresses you.

Or first looks up at the serpents and goes, well done.

And you were only gone three days.

What?

Three days?

How does this keep on happening?

You have to stop.

I'm fucking with you, Marama.

You were gone like an hour.

I didn't even know that you wanted to have a sense of humor, let alone have.

I'm a little fun.

I guess, yeah.

He's laughing.

I guess we just haven't been on that level yet.

Really?

So I just didn't even know to expect it from you.

It was funny, though.

I liked it.

Yes.

I just thought I would do a little time travel planes hopping.

It was fun.

Yeah.

Get a little velocity.

I enjoyed it.

Yeah.

That was nice.

Well, yes, that being said, I have wasted some of your time here, and we don't have a lot of it.

All right, We should have a chat.

Okay.

Okay, yeah.

He ushers you guys into the hall, begins walking and talking with you.

I mean, you see, Ma Goblin has some of her tech set up.

Looks like she's had people help her move her lab into parts of it into the castle here.

And Garash goes, I suspect we only have a couple days.

Jovir's trying to shore up allies and squash rebellion before she makes her move to consolidate the crowns.

Who has she been successful in shoring up?

What's the word on the street?

Who's been shored?

You guys know from what Garash had said last time that she basically has all of the Unsealy court as she had before and 80% of the Seely Court.

Right.

A ton of them just as soon as there was chaos just wanted structure and someone to take care of them

and fled to the Unsealy court.

I wasn't sure if that was like a new development.

Not a new development, just the Seely and Unsealy courts are essentially united under jovier right besides some pockets of rebellion yeah and garash goes ma goblin can get out messages to any of your old friends on the material plane if you have anybody that you can think of that would be willing to lend a hand but the factions here will need your direct attention i can get you about halfway across the world in a day.

That means I can get you to the summer court with the trapped green knights or to the autumn court with the automatons and charbon.

Can you conceal honeysuckle and the grish?

Looks out the window at these absolutely enormous serpents?

No.

Okay.

Okay.

Now, do we bring them as a show of power or do we leave them here?

We can park them nearby.

We can bring them almost all the way and valet them somewhere.

Well, it depends on where you go.

If you go to the Green Knights, there is a war about to happen there.

A large-scale battle with thousands of troops.

Okay, so they would actually really benefit from the war.

So you would need them.

Yeah.

With Charbin and Berlin, you might want to do the leave them in the parking lot deal.

Right.

Go in and then call them if something goes wrong.

Put some leaves over them.

There's definitely no just walking into the castle besiegement situation.

There are too many people to sword and shield your way through.

Gotcha.

Okay.

I'm definitely curious about what's going on in the autumn court, but I think we have to focus on the green knights holding on the castle.

They need our help.

Yeah.

Yes, I would say that situation is a bit more dire.

There are definitely lives at risk there.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Is there anyone that either of you want to contact?

On the material plane?

Yeah.

Yeah, there's a lot of people.

We should write a bunch of letters, right?

Uh-huh.

Do you want to be in charge of writing?

And we'll just like stand over your shoulders and we can dictate?

Uh, sure.

Yeah.

Go right ahead.

Um, I'll be the secretary.

Great.

Okay, so we've got General Broadsbeard.

Slow down.

Hold on.

Okay.

That wasn't.

G, no, sorry.

She's so anxious about you.

What?

And

he's writing general.

G-E-N.

J-Don.

Okay.

J-A.

Wait.

Calder crosses it out.

Messed me up.

Kenna takes the paper and begins writing to General Bronzebeard.

All right.

Well, we should probably contact Igneous and Elzar, as well as the, you know, all the Void Elves if we can get to them.

Yeah, so you can just send out a call for help to essentially like Princess Shiverblight of the Living Wood, as well as the Void Elves, aka the Crick Elves, Mima, Elzor, and the Deep Elves.

What about Ursa?

Ursia and the Elves of Suner.

You see, Ma Goblin begins sending out distress signals and a message from you guys.

Can I ask you something, Garash?

Yes.

It's kind of like naive and sentimental, but I feel like if a lot of the Seeley court knew what Jovia did, they wouldn't be on board with her.

Yes, and that's why I think it's important.

If you were to save Summer Court Castle, you might win over even more people.

It's about more than just

the folks that are holed up in there, it's a symbol.

Okay.

Is there anything else we need to do here?

Or should we just go to the.

I mean, if there's an active siege going, then I feel a bit of a fire under my ass.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm going to fire off a letter to my brothers in the Ice Knife, and then I'm ready to go.

Right on.

Okay.

Yeah, so you guys have Mob Goblin, you have the Sea Elves of Suner, you have the Dwarves of Iron Deep, you have the giants of the Ice Knife, and you have the Dragons and the Elves and the Denizens of the Living Wood.

And Mob Goblin sends out distress signals to all of them.

Great.

I send a thank you note to Wave Mother A Coralil.

Okay.

For holding, for holding the noise.

I'm seeing this so right.

What do you say, Saul?

Thank you so much for all of your tremendous efforts.

Your loyal companion, Sol Bufo.

Wow.

Wow.

Sealed with a kiss.

Seal it with a kiss.

I try to seal it with a kiss, but I just get the paper really wet because my mouth is so big.

Ma Goblin just goes, ill.

Wow.

Just if you've got, like, some wax or something.

Yeah, it's probably just going to, like, scan this, so you're just going to jam up.

Yeah, yeah.

It was sexy, but okay.

You licked the hell out of that envelope.

Yeah.

Yeah, so you guys send out your messages, and Garash goes up to you guys and goes, whenever you're ready to make your move, I will see that your trip is swift.

Okay.

All right.

Yeah.

Um ma, before we go, will you um we look in on Albin?

I think he might be turning into a mosquito.

Oh, uh, you see, Albin is uh over in the corner.

You see, uh, uh, he's a little beat up.

You see his fingers like bleeding a little bit through some cut that he got while being eaten by the serpent queen.

And you see, he's just like sucking it absentmindedly, but starts to seem like he's really getting into it.

Oh my god.

I think he's becoming a swarm keeper ranger.

Okay.

I don't fully want to know what happened there, but I don't know why he...

You all should not take him places.

He belongs inside.

You know that he's a bad guy.

He is indoor camping.

I know, but he's so funny when he gets taken outdoors.

Camping's not his thing.

I understand that now.

Oh, and I'll say that Grosh and Ma Goblin resupply you guys.

We'll give Kenna 10 potions.

Oh, nice.

Thank you.

We'll use those, I'm sure.

Ma, how's the uh how's the lasso coming along?

Well, it's it's only been a few hours, but I believe by tomorrow, if you're going down to the autumn court as your sort of second mission, I think I'll have something for you.

All right,

really fast.

I'm really impressed with your productivity.

I don't try to enshrine productivity too much, but you are doing it right.

Yeah, you see, she's watching some kind of sporting event while she also is sending out all these distress signals, while with the other hand, she's trying to manipulate some kind of arcane device to replicate the shackles.

Wow, she's watching a Bloodborne Steve run.

Unreal.

Yeah, the one where he's just wearing a pot on his head.

Is there anything else that either of you need to do?

I don't think so.

I'm ready to go.

Yeah.

Yeah.

All right.

Let's sweet.

Keep moving.

Yeah.

You guys go back out into the castle courtyard, mount your serpents, and you see Garash raises his hands above his head.

Good luck.

We'll see you tomorrow.

Hopefully.

Definitely.

Definitely.

Yes, of course.

What am I saying?

Sorry, another joke.

Cloud giant here.

Was it really?

Hey, you know what?

You got your head in the clouds, bud.

I can't hear you over all this wind.

You see, did you guys hear that?

You're making the wind.

What?

No, I don't think so.

You see,

as you guys mount your serpents, Garash raises his hands above his head.

As he does, you feel the wind begin to pick up.

His eyes turn white as the air seems to tornado around him like he's the eye of the storm.

With a great burst of magic, he throws his hands towards you and you feel a godly gust of wind propel the serpents into the air as you fly with high speed through the fae sky.

And you guys are traveling, you know, halfway across the world here, but it's only going to take you about a day, but you do have time.

So you are aboard these serpents.

How do you guys want to split yourselves up?

Obviously, Calder's on honeysuckle and Saul is on licorice.

But is there anything you guys want to do to prepare as you fly towards Summer Court Castle?

Oh, I'm just getting ready.

I'm just, I'm gonna cast a spell, but I just don't want to say what it is till we like just start.

Okay, okay, all right.

So, you

prepare a trap triggered by bad guys.

Well, it's not a trap, it's just something fun.

Great, okay.

Okay, so we know the castle is being besieged.

Are we just showing in Uh, guns blazing?

See, Kenna looks down at the serpents.

I don't know any other way to show up with these guys.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, I guess if there's a little time, maybe I'll try to get in a quick swag sesh, do some meditating.

Okay, yeah, you can try to regain your spores because you don't have them right now.

Yeah.

I'll do wisdom save.

Sure.

You guys have time for essentially a long rest atop these serpents.

The serpents will guide you.

If anything bad happens, you assume that they would alert you.

Oh, that's not going to do it.

That's just a 12.

You do not feel like

you've overextended yourself.

You opened up like a portal to the beast lands and then bonded with a godly serpent.

I think you're a little tapped out.

I'm out of spores.

Kenna, you're grabbing me really tight, by the way.

You're falling off the serpent.

You are

asleep, my friend.

That's how you tell you.

Tell me what to do.

Kenna keeps you alive, then lays you down to rest.

Can I gather up Foster Foster in my arms and say, like, Foster, can you feel Ollie?

You see, Foster looks up, like he's almost sniffing the wind or trying to sense him, and then

puts his head down, sad.

Oh.

You don't get the sense that Ollie has died or anything, but you get the sense that Ollie is with Syrah and they are trapped right now, far away.

I'm going to try to make myself like cozy and cuddly to give him the comfort that he's been giving me.

Yeah, you cuddle into Foster and he cuddles back to you, and you guys comfort each other.

I make myself as small as I can so that he can hold me.

Kelly!

Kelly, let's go!

Yeah, I cast reduce on myself so that he can hold me.

Did she fall?

Kelly!

Peter!

Bunnysuckle!

She blew away!

It feels really good.

I think she blew away.

You see, yeah.

Foster gets bigger, especially with the power of the serpents here that he's kind of connected to,

extends his wings out and hugs them around tiny Callie.

As you guys think she's dying, Honeysuckle uses his ability and this giant bird and Callie are pulled over to Honeysuckle on the other side.

From this aerial view, I also am going to like try to just survey if we see in the distance marigold.

Oh, Marigold?

Yeah.

Oh, like if she's in the battle?

She's out prowling.

Yeah, okay, okay.

Yeah, go ahead and we'll say that you guys are starting to get close.

We'll say that you spend the whole day flying, licking your wounds from the vampire fights and

uh the little encounter that you had today, um, but you are covering thousands of miles in that time, uh, and you begin to get close to where the water meets the land, where uh, it becomes the summer court.

The sun has set, uh, and it is turning to night.

Uh, but everybody, go ahead and give me perception checks.

That's a three on the dice.

Okay.

He comes an eight.

15.

Okay.

I'm too tiny.

22.

Okay.

Yeah, I'll say you guys have stuff in your adventuring pack, so you don't get close enough to see anything with the naked eye, but you're able to use your binoculars.

You don't see any dragons in the sky, but as you get near Summer Court, you begin to see hundreds of torches and bonfires outside of the Seeley Castle gates.

And I'll say, you pass around like the binoculars that you have.

Kenna has some, starts passing them around, and you guys are looking.

You see, the summer keep is an enormous, beautiful fairy tale castle.

Tall marble spires that seem to glitter in the torchlight, giant stained glass windows with the symbol of the Seeley Court, an enormous orange sun with flames that look to actually move.

There are green banners and and flags, but they are far outnumbered by the black and blue banners of the invading army.

In front of the castle gates, there are thousands of winter court troops.

They have war tents set up.

It looks like they've probably been here since the summit, so a couple days.

There are legions of infantry, artillery, siege equipment, knights on horseback, and griffins.

They have not attacked yet, but the forces in the castle are trapped and probably trapped by magical means because you would assume that there'd be a wizard or somebody who could like teleport them out.

They seem to have set up a perimeter to trap them in here magically and otherwise.

The keep itself is being, based on Garash's intel, is being defended by true green knights, ones that, you know, did not betray Cyrilla.

They're in the castle proper.

There are disconnected watchtowers near the shore that have the banners up of the winter court.

And as you guys approach, there's really no way for you guys to do this stealthily.

You begin to hear screams from the army as you guys approach with these like giant beasts.

You see signal fires go up.

You hear war horns.

Everybody, go ahead and roll initiative.

Okay.

Oh, boy.

All right.

Everybody go after the siege equipment.

God damn it.

That's a gnat one.

Wow.

19 for Coliopid.

18.

It becomes a three, so pretty good.

Okay, so as you guys approach here, you're flying in on two gigantic serpents.

These war horns are going up.

There are legions of enemies.

They are going to, basically, as soon as they see attackers coming in from the air, they're going to make a play to try to take the castle to defend themselves.

Here's how this is going to work.

I'm going to be using a combination of 5e combat and something inspired by Matt Colville's rules for warfare.

So check out Kingdoms and Warfare by Matt Colville.

I can assure you his system is much more fleshed out than what I'm doing here.

Since there are so many enemies, we're going to be referring to them by legion.

Each legion gets a number of attacks equal to their power.

They also get two reactions per turn.

Engaging them in melee range provokes opportunity attacks, as does fleeing without disengaging, just like regular.

There are four legions of infantry up front storming the castle.

These are the guys on foot using battering rams and using ladders to climb the castle walls.

They have a power of eight and do 10 damage every time they hit.

So four legions.

Each one gets eight attacks.

They have a plus to hit and then they do 10 damage every time they hit.

Behind them are two legions of cavalry.

Typically, cavalry would just be people on horseback, but I'm also counting like essentially elites.

These are like the knights with magic items and who might have crossbows or things to shoot up at the serpents, which the infantry do not have.

They have a power of six because there are less of them, but they hit harder and do 15 damage on every hit.

Then behind them are four legions of archers.

They can attack anyone on the battlefield, but have less AC than everybody else.

They have a power level of eight, just like the infantry, and there are, again, four legions of them.

Behind them are two legions of combined infantry and siege equipment.

So catapults, ballistas, and soldiers to defend them.

They have the worst attack bonus, but do the most damage.

So it's harder for them to hit, easier for them to miss uh they have a power level of six uh and there's two of them so two legions of six every time you do 20 damage to a legion they lose a power rating which means less attacks and one point closer to them dying once they get lower than half their original power they will do courage checks each hit that are basically concentration checks so they're converse half the damage of an attack if they fail the legion breaks and is effectively out of the battle they fled or are too wounded or they surrender then for the the green knights who are defending the castle, you see that as your serpents begin approaching the shore and the war horns start going up, the commanders from the different legions start sending their knights at the castle walls.

But you do see green knights come up to defend it.

The castle wall has an AC of 20 and HP of 800.

At the end of every round, they will try to rally to boost the wall's HP.

They will do a flat roll.

The DC is the amount of legions that is coming after them.

So if you can absorb some attacks for them, or if you can kill some legions, that will make the DC easier for them.

If they pass, the wall gains back half its life.

If they pass by greater than four, they take out a unit of infantry from the enemy and gain back half their life.

If they fail by more than four, they get a quarter of their life back.

And if they fail by more than that, they do not rally.

If you guys

use any kind of ability like a bardic inspiration or something that would normally aid somebody like a help action, that will add one to their role.

so like if if kenna were down there just spamming help actions that would effectively roleplay wise be her up on the walls kicking dudes off of ladders and stuff and adding to that wow okay acting first at initiative 20 are the legions of archers for the winter court so you see as you guys approach these war horns go off these signal fires go up you see infantrymen begin charging towards the castle gates two of the four legions are going to shoot up at the castle wall, just try to take out green knights on the wall up there.

And then one is going to go after each serpent as they approach.

Quick, Saul, put your cloak of displacement on Licorice.

It's too small.

I don't have time to alter it.

It barely fits over one scale and starts to break.

It's like putting a vest on a dog.

It hates it.

Okay, so we'll do the eight attacks on Licorice first.

No.

Hate that.

Four hits.

Four hits.

That is 40 damage to Licorice.

You see

start peppering into Licorice's scales, but Licorice is no little avatar anymore.

Hisses throughout the air, just this roar that begins to bring starfire to his mouth as he begins to charge up.

And Saul, you feel this inner fury.

That's right.

Use it.

Can I use my reaction to reduce that damage?

Basically, grab one of those arrows.

I will say you are linked to Licorice.

I will allow you to do that.

You almost sense it as it's getting near one of Licorice's exposed scales.

Uh, they would do 10 damage, and I believe you could just take that out completely, right?

Let me roll it.

I have to roll 1d10 plus 18.

Oh, well, then you got it.

Okay, cool.

Yeah, that's yeah, that math works out.

I'll say you see this one little area that it looks like the archers were all targeting.

They're all basically shooting from the same area.

So, you see this volley of arrows come up.

Three of them hit this one area between his scales, and you reach out and grab the fourth one, preventing 10 damage there.

So just 30 damage total.

Can I toss it back?

No way.

I toss it anyway.

Come on now.

You toss it down.

There is a minimum.

You have to do 20 damage or it does nothing.

So you toss it down.

You see it like meekly falls out.

Oh, there it goes.

Nice saw.

That's one less arrow to worry about.

Then, volley of arrows towards honeysuckle.

Honeysuckle's harder to hit.

A honeysuckle is AC 24.

That's right.

I see a one and a three already.

That is just three hits for 30 damage.

Okay, honeysuckle's down.

Just kidding, everybody.

You see the way, yeah, honeysuckle, the way he jumps through the air with his reverse gravity, it does seem like he begins to fall as he gets hit by a couple arrows, and it is concerning for a moment.

But as you begin to drop, you feel feel his scales harden, and you see the other five arrows just break off, like successfully hit, but explode as soon as they hit him.

And the fiery arrows just turn to smoke and go away.

Wow, good joke, Calder.

I didn't know Garash came along.

Okay, so then the other two legions are going to keep their eyes on the prize, and the archers shoot at the castle walls.

Castle walls are AC20, so they just have to get an eight to do damage to the green knights on top of it.

10 hits, so 100 damage to the castle.

What?

Yeah, that's why they have so much HP and why they can rally.

So, this is, it's already looking intense.

You see, um, yeah, volleys of arrows, and you see green knights falling off the edge of the walls here

as the archers back up the infantry that are trying to ram down the castle gates.

Uh, Calliope, that is your turn at Initiative 19.

Okay, so what I want to do is, like, as we're getting close, I actually want to jump off of Honeysuckle and onto a catapult or a ballista and I want to attack that.

Okay, hell yeah.

You dive off.

You hear as Honeysuckle rides over these people and his gravitational pull is like kind of wrecking the land under him.

You feel like a shake and like minor tremors wherever he goes.

You hear people screaming and infantrymen and soldiers yelling, the beast, the beast.

As I'm falling, the spell I cast takes effect.

It's one of my new magical secrets that I get as a bard.

It's called Fount of Moonlight.

Oh, it's cool.

Cool light wreaths your body for the duration, emitting bright light in a 20-foot radius and dim light for an additional 20 feet.

Until the spell ends, you have resistance to radiant damage, and your melee attacks deal an extra 2d6 radiant damage on a hit.

So I want the image of this to be like I erupt into light and then plummet like a comet onto there.

Oh,

my god.

Yeah.

I'll take my binoculars back out and watch.

That's why I want, I didn't want to, I didn't want to cast it before because I wanted to erupt into flames.

Callie, you are like a shooting star with your lance just lit up as you jump down and you hear screams, the gods, the gods hate us

as this giant honeysuckle flies by with you jumping down.

They are going to get attacks on you.

They're not going to do their siege equipment damage.

These are just the soldiers that are surrounding it So they get a reaction as soon as you approach as a legion, so they're gonna try to hit you

Two hits for 20 damage.

Okay, um, I make my concentration checks

So you land down and as you do all of these dudes are screaming, but there are so many of them that some of them have like literally Take like rocks from the catapult and start chucking them at you.

This is like an ugly fight guys start grabbing at you trying to punch you or tackle you you get tackled by a dude and other guys start wrestling you down trying to punch you in the head i'm just gonna say to all of them i'm not here for you and i'm just gonna start attacking the catapults and ballistas hell yeah go ahead and make your attacks uh this legion has an ac of 18

that is a 22 a 32 and a 31 yeah

you hit all three times so yeah i'll say you land down like a fucking comet on top of this catapult you bust a boulder that was in there getting ready to shoot.

Uh, it flings off harmlessly as you jump off and start fighting all these guys.

Uh, go ahead and do your damage.

Um, I'm doing two divine smites, and I've got all my extra radiant damage, and I'm doing one bardic.

Jesus Christ, yeah, baby, yeah.

You see, as you guys are riding on these serpents, there is just this explosion of radiant energy down where the catapults are.

Callie, are you a god?

If you are, you have to tell us.

104 damage, and because I rolled a nine on my bardic, my AC becomes 28.

Oh my god.

They had six power and you did a hundred something damage.

So you take five points away from them.

They're down to one.

I'm going to say there's no way they can pass this courage check.

They're going to roll it to six.

Yeah, okay.

So you see this one siege legion.

Their catapults explode as Calliope erupts with radiant energy, begins killing a bunch of dudes.

You see a bunch of them that are near the water here begin running away and jumping into the water.

This legion is toast.

Yeah, rethink your life.

Tell your friends.

Tell your friends.

Okay, and that will bring down the DC for the Green Knights at the end of the round.

Now only 11 legions going after them.

After Calliope's absolutely insane turn, you do see that there is another legion of

siege equipment next to you, and you see a bunch of those soldiers start running over towards you.

I want to like almost taking the barrel of a gun and putting it to my face.

I want to take the like catapult and angle it at me and say, just fucking try.

Saul, that is your turn.

You are a top licorice here.

Okay, I see this go down.

I'm like, holy shit.

Okay.

Tough to follow, but let's do this, buddy.

So I'm going to turn to Kenna and say, Kenna, where do you need to go?

Where do you think you you can help?

I could go down to the castle walls and just start freaking kicking ladders and caving a dude's heads with my hammer.

Okay, great.

I'm gonna drop you off after we do this.

So first I want to do a flyby on the legions of archers and just blast them with starfire.

Sick.

Okay, so Licorice is going to unleash his breath weapon.

Yeah, you see fresh arrows in between Licorice's scales.

You will ride him down.

You guys dip down and the archers begin to scream as you get closer and they get ready to knock another row of arrows.

I will roll saves for them.

You can go after

one legion with this.

Okay.

And go ahead and roll 16d10.

Fail.

So yeah, you guys see Starfire explodes from Licorice as he rains fire down onto this legion of archers that just shot at him.

That is going to be 92 damage.

Fuck yes.

Okay.

You more than half this legion of archers.

They are down to three power.

There are more archers in their legion than there are in the siege.

So now on future attacks, they will have to do courage checks to see if they disband or not.

For now, that legion still has three attacks.

Okay, so once I do that, can I take an attack?

You can then take an attack.

If you're going to jump down, though, they get opportunity attacks on you.

Can I just like stick out my leg as we go by and just try and kick them?

No.

Okay.

Stunning kick.

A drive-by kicking.

You did, they only get three attacks now because they're down to three power.

I think, yes.

I'm going to, I'm going to take my scarf off.

I'm going to tie it around Kenna.

I'm going to say,

Acreana's waiting.

I got to keep you safe.

And then I'm going to do a little giddy up slap on Licorice.

and send him on towards the castle wall.

Hell yes.

Gonna use the key points to do step of the wind on that.

Disengage it.

Okay, so yeah, so Licorice is able to disengage and Saul, you stay with these archers who are trying to shoot out at Licorice, and you just start fucking wailing on them as Kenna rides off.

Before she can protest, you've already jumped off.

Yeah.

Let's rethink this, guys, right?

This is a bad idea.

We can all agree this is a bad idea.

Beastrider, the beast rider.

They pull out swords.

Some of them do.

Others are scared.

We're talking about like dozens of dudes here.

So there are going to be three opportunity attacks just as you get within range.

21 to hit on one.

That is the highest.

21 does hit now because I gave off my scarf.

That is 10 damage to you, Saul.

Okay.

So I'll say again, this is like a really dirty fight.

So you jump down, you kick over a bunch of archers, but another guy like tackles you and tries to like cave your head in with a rock.

I like

grab the rock and like kick it at another person.

So I'm just being like, this is clearly not working for you.

You see, they look around at their thousands of allies.

We'll

see.

Well, for sure, we'll see.

Somebody punches me in the head.

The heavens have spoken.

Yeah, you see, licorice flies away.

You are straight up in the middle of the battle.

At least Callie's on the outside.

You are completely surrounded by thousands of enemies.

Here we go.

I'm going to do two attacks and then a flurry of blows.

Great.

So just roll them all at once.

14, 18, 31, and 26.

14 does not hit, but the other ones do.

Okay, I'll use a key point to add a D4.

Okay.

17.

That hits.

Nice archers.

Yeah.

All four hits.

Yeah.

Okay.

Actually, give me these.

Normally, I have you guys like add up your damage for your total damage.

Give me individual ones because these guys might flee.

Okay.

Yeah, they have to do courage checks, which are like concentration checks.

Okay.

So yeah, Saul, you get up, you're having this like fight in the mud, and you just kick this guy, basically kill one dude instantly, and then run over and just start fighting with a bunch of other units here.

Yeah, I just like inflate my throat sack huge and start screaming as I'm just wailing on guys.

Beast Rider!

Beast Rider!

I like the sound of that!

19 damage?

Okay, they'll accourage check.

That's a natural seven.

They failed.

So this legion breaks.

You can do this damage to the next legion.

There are three more legions of archers.

Okay.

But the first legion of archers breaks.

So one legion of archers down, one legion of siege down uh so you see the archers see you like just kick the shit out of a few dudes just to go and just like twist someone's head off with a roundhouse kick and a bunch of guys just drop their bows and just run

just doing the black widow like leg strangled everybody yes

jesus christ i was doing it so fast

it's so fun he just pops someone's head that frog is so good against archers arrows never get to him i'm gonna do all the rest of the damage Yep.

At 28 damage.

Okay, so you do another unit of power damage to one of the archer legions.

So that one is now at seven, and then you got two more at full at eight.

Gotcha.

After Saul's turn, that is the infantry legions.

They are at the front lines, are trying to get in through the castle.

They don't have any way of attacking you guys.

So that is going to be four legions of eight.

That is going to be straight up 32 attacks on the castle wall.

Oh no.

Is it cool if I take some temp HP from messing up those legions?

Yes, once you take out a legion, you can do temp HP.

Beautiful.

Okay, now I'm going to roll my attacks for the infantry legions on the castle wall.

Yeah, you see them throwing up ladders.

You see using battering rams to try to get through the archway.

Green knights are fighting them, trying to keep them off.

19 hits.

190 damage to the castle wall.

Okay, this is going to be an infrastructure project.

Yes.

so this represents not only the actual structure, but this is for them to essentially break the lines here and get in and infiltrate.

They can breach the doors.

They can breach the doors.

Okay, so the infantry legions go.

After that, Calder, you are up with honeysuckle.

Right.

You suddenly hear screeching in the air and see two wiverns fly out air support for the winter court here and begin trying to...

Are are you guys on our side?

Just letting out terrible shrieks.

They have like man faces on, but are otherwise wiverns.

They seem undecided.

So that's a maybe.

Listen to my pitch.

They're both just going to go at honeysuckle here.

They begin stabbing down into honeysuckle with poison stingers.

21 to hit misses.

These things are like literally flies to honeysuckle who brushes them off, claws into Honeysuckle's scales, but they are just hard as a rock.

Second one, the Stingers.

You see, the Stinger sparks against the bronze scales, does not manage to hurt him.

Yeah, these are like the mosquitoes we saw in the Beastlands.

Yeah.

And then you see, as that Wyvern fails to get in on Honeysuckle, this other one is going to screech and go at you, Calder.

Whoa, what did I do?

Just screaming, face in eternal agony, takes one attack with his claws, Nat one, misses big time,

but then takes a stinger attack.

Stinger is what I don't want.

Yes, this venomous stinger like leaking this horrible ooze.

That is only a Nat 6 misses big time.

So these guys are just fucking clowns.

Okay, can I spray it with Deet as a reaction?

Star Trek grabbing its eyes.

And then after the Wiverns, that is Kenneth's turn.

You guys can see from afar especially you call it pull up your binoculars to kind of look at the battlefield you see that uh kenna and licorice have joined the front lines of the green knights you hear cheers go up as the serpent joins them at first they're like the beast don't know the beast the beast the beast the beast the beast the beast as soon as the green knights realize that uh you guys have come to support them they start rallying and look excited.

Kenna jumps down and is going to join them.

She will give them a plus one to their roles at the end of the round as she starts fighting dudes up on the castle walls and pushing ladders off.

Go get them, sis.

After that, that is the cavalry legions.

There are two.

Both have six power, so they get six attacks.

So one will go after...

Let's say the castle wall and the other one will go after Licorice, who is like hovering over the castle wall right now.

So we'll handle the castle wall first.

Okay, of six attacks, that is two hits, 30 more damage to the castle wall.

They shoot crossbows up, and more of the elite start climbing the ladders and getting in there on the front lines.

Kenna is trying to fight them off and help rally the green knights.

Then the other six are going to take shots up at Licorice.

Licorice is harder to hit than the castle wall by one AC.

Good.

Three hits, 45 damage to Licorice.

Licorice shrieks in fury as crossbow bolts uh pierce his scales after the cavalry legions.

That is the siege legions.

One of them is gone, and the other one is

very scared of Cali right now.

I'll say that there's still there's still a commander there like yelling out for them to shoot the catapults.

So they'll go half send infantrymen at Cali and half shoot catapults at the walls here.

Nice.

Okay, so they're gonna shoot three catapults at the walls.

One hit of the three, another 25 damage to the castle wall.

Can I use my reaction because I'm right there and rebuke the violent?

You absolutely can.

So they make a save, right?

Yeah, they make a wisdom saving throw or they take radiant damage equal to what they just dealt.

Okay, fail.

And with that amount of damage, takes a power point away.

So you see, after the catapult flings a flaming boulder towards the castle wall, a radiant explosion comes from it you see a bunch of the soldiers around it blow back from the radiant damage and the catapult is no more I don't know if you're religious but seems like the gods are angry with you

I would totally flee if I were you guys I would totally flee meteor woman meteor woman it's meteor witch to you

Yeah, they are so scared.

The gods hate them, apparently.

Okay,

they are.

Okay, so they're down to five, so they only have two more attacks.

But some soldiers are going to run up and take cracks at you with their swords.

My AC is 28.

Yeah, no, they don't do it.

Hey, Merc, just a reminder her AC is 28.

Yeah, you easily parry the few soldiers that manage to make it over to you.

I think I'm going so fast, I do have a little like a comet tail.

Hell yes.

The medium witch!

After the Siege Legions, Calder, that is your turn.

You're a top honeysuckle.

And you've got two Wiverns snapping at you.

And then obviously you've got this whole nuts battle down below.

I thought briefly about seeing if Callie needed to be pulled back onto Honeysuckle, but

I think she's good.

I've got a new nickname.

It's Meteor Witch.

I salute Meteor Witch, and I keep on riding.

Then I'm going to ride Honeysuckle right into this uh cavalry and uh check out the uh the earthquake uh ability.

Oh, yes, okay.

So, Calder, you ride past the siege equipment, you ride past the archers, and you see these like elite knights.

Some of them are glowing with like you know, swords with runes on them and stuff.

They've got crossbows out, they're commanding the other infantry units of where to go and everything.

And Honeysuckle just dives down into the earth as he spikes down.

He just swallows like 30 dudes who are in the way.

There is an erupting, like seismic earthquake around him as he shifts the earth beneath everyone.

Go ahead and roll 15d8 bludgeoning damage, and I will roll a save for this cavalry legion as everyone on the battlefield screams.

That is a fail.

Amazing.

Then they take 73 damage.

Okay.

Wow.

Okay.

So you have a cavalry unit.

Now they will have to.

It's a half calf now.

The half-calves

will need to roll courage checks now to see if they break on the next hit.

You guys do have to take attacks, though, as they approach.

There is an opportunity attack that triggers as soon as you get close to them because there's so many of them.

So they're going to attack Honeysuckle.

Two hits, 30 damage to Honeysuckle.

Okay.

Honeysuckle just shrugs it off.

These guys look horrified.

A bunch of their swords like break on his scales.

So now the cavalry is at half calf.

There is still another full legion of six.

But Calder, you may take the rest of your turn.

That is just Honeysuckle who used up his action.

Sweet.

So as Honeysuckle like burrows into the ground and comes out, I want him to like buck me off.

And I want to flip through the air and call my bonded weapon right as I land.

You know what?

I'll say it now.

I'm going to action surge, so I'll just take six attacks if these guys are.

Oh my god.

And Honeysuckle gets to take it.

Yeah.

And Honeysuckle will get to take his three attacks.

This is insane.

So yeah.

Honeysuckle dives down, burrows under the ground, causes a terrible earthquake, destroys a bunch of this cavalry, hops back out.

Calder jumps into the night sky.

You see, he holds his hand up.

Snow begins falling out of the sky almost in slow motion, flakes around you as a sword of ice appears in your hand, and you launch down and just start omni-slashing motherfuckers.

I like to imagine this sword is glowing just a little bit from Callie's light across the battlefield.

Yeah, you got some moonlight.

Okay, that is a 30, a 29, a 14.

Okay, 14 does not hit.

Others do.

Another 29, a 25, and a 27.

Give me the first round of damage because this cavalry unit might break before you do the other damage.

Gotcha.

That's 18 damage.

18 damage from one attack.

Okay, so they will roll a courage check.

Have to get a 10.

They get an 11, so they do pass.

So they stick around.

Go ahead and give me your second attack.

15 damage.

15 damage.

Roll another courage check.

They pass, but you take out another unit of power.

They are down to two.

Give me the damage for the next two attacks.

14 damage.

Nat three, this line breaks.

The Aesthetic

half calf is a no calf.

Caffeine free, baby.

This cavalry unit runs away.

What's the point of you?

And you still have two more attacks of damage.

You can do those to the fresh Legion if you want.

So you and Honeysuckle turn and just attack the other knights.

Great.

That is 31 damage with my last two attacks.

Okay, sick.

Okay, so you take out another unit.

So the cavalry here only has five attacks.

Now, honeysuckle.

Now honeysuckle gets to go because you action search.

So honeysuckle bursts out of the earth.

And go ahead and you can re-roll to see if you recharge your earthquake.

Five or six on the D6.

Come on, come on, come on.

Come on, baby.

Omnom, indeed.

That's a five.

Yeah!

You don't have to use it now, but you can.

You see, Starfire emerges around Honeysuckle, and he looks like he has the power to do it again if he would like.

I mean, why not?

We came in guns blazing.

Hell yes.

I want this Wyverns to fly away on fear.

Yeah, go ahead and roll me that 15d8 again.

As soon as he dives up for air for a second,

dives back down.

And there is an enormous earthquake.

They will do a save.

This Legion legitimately rolls a Nat 1.

Yes.

Fuck yeah.

That's 70.

70 damage.

Jesus.

Okay.

They are down to two.

The next time they get hit, high chance that they end up fleeing.

Okay, so barely any cavalry left.

Seismic Earthquake.

starts to break the line.

You see a bunch of the knights are separated from the other ones.

The like landscape is shifting.

shifting so there are like natural walls that are coming up that are sort of blocking you guys um and just making it tougher for the enemies out here hell yeah and one last thing i'll do is use the helm of ultras with my reaction uh command an ally to melee attack okay

i think i'll command the meteor witch oh helly

yeah him up

you fuck yes yeah i'll say you have since you're attached to Honeysuckle and he's this, you know, great monster now, he is able to like echo out a great

that channels the power of the helm to Calliope across the battlefield.

It's a 19 on the die.

Definitely hits.

You attack more of the soldiers that are near these catapults.

I'm gonna do another fourth level smite.

Sounds like a shower to me.

My god.

Put your eclipse glasses on, everybody.

58 damage.

Whoa.

Okay.

Okay, you take out another

two

power from this legion.

So, Callie, you cut down a bunch of dudes that are trying to load up another catapult.

You see, the commander is just pointing at you for them to go after you next time and to stop going after the wall.

Why don't you read the future's in the stars?

And I think it's over for you.

Yeah, they look up and they just see honeysuckle and licorice overhead.

Just screams of terror everywhere.

There's a chance for you to make a new alliance.

If anybody was coming into this context list, you guys would look like the bad guy.

He just rode in on giant monsters and just started killing everyone.

You can't read your fate in the stars, for they have fallen.

Okay, after Calder's turn, that is the Green Knight's turn.

Try to rally.

There we go.

The wall is at 455 HP.

They could potentially get some back.

They're almost almost at half HP, so you know, another round of the damage they've been taking, and it might go down.

So hopefully they can rally.

You guys get a plus one to this because Kenna is helping them out.

It's only a DC9, so an eight or higher, and they can rally and get some HP back for the wall.

And if this goes badly, they could potentially not get any HP and the wall could come down next round.

So let's go ahead and roll this.

We want an eight or higher.

It's Murph rolling too.

Yeah, we're sure we want Murph to roll it.

Oh, shout out.

Shout out to the two crews.

The green knights do not rally.

The wall stays at the same HP.

We gave them a reason to rally.

You definitely fight.

They're definitely fighting thousands and thousands of dudes there.

Kenna, what did you tell them?

Definitely fighting people.

You see, yeah, a bunch of green knights are rushing to the top of the castle wall, firing like volleys of arrows down.

There's like halflings and Eladron, gnomes, and goblins in their green plate, swinging these like magically enchanted swords and stuff.

A lot of them are paladins and fighters, trying to fight off these guys that are trying to climb up onto the walls, but the enemy is gaining ground

at the top of the round.

That is the Legions of Archers.

So there is one one that is just up there with Saul.

They're definitely just going to train swords on Saul.

So seven attacks onto Saul.

Eesh.

Five hits.

Oh, boy.

50 damage.

Okay.

All right.

Doesn't feel very good.

Then the other 16 are going to shoot volleys of arrows at the castle wall.

12 hits, 120 damage to the castle wall.

Yeah, you see a bunch of the green knights that were up there fighting get shot with arrows and fall back as more of the infantrymen get up on ladders.

You see the battering ram begins to take out the castle door.

Castle door like breaks down, but there are a bunch of knights waiting and they start just fighting with swords and fists and shields right there in the middle of the battlefield.

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after the archer legions calliope that is your turn okay can i take it hit by hit because i want to get to soul yes definitely

Another fucking 19 on the dump.

That definitely hits.

These dudes are screaming.

They're so terrified of you.

Sound like wyverns.

49 damage.

All right.

So the check is half of that.

So 24 they need it.

I'll say only in a net 20.

And they don't.

They get a 17, which is pretty good.

So they try to rally, but you see a bunch of them just like erupt into fire as they get near your starfire lance.

And they start running off another legion down.

The siege equipment has been abandoned.

Yes.

And you see that there are some catapults here and stuff that you could feasibly use, but honestly, the meteor witch might be stronger than

might be stronger than the catapults i want to now run okay and get back to back with saul hell yes okay here is what um oh wait yes archers are next yeah yeah archers are the next thing so you run into the mix as you get near though they are going to get opportunity attacks uh my ac is 27 because of my defensive jesus christ okay so they have to get uh 15 so seven attacks as you run into this legion of archers trying to get to Saul.

Yeah, you see, they've pulled out short swords and they're fighting Saul next to lines of other archers and will take attacks as you get closer.

Those swords are too short.

Still two hits.

Okay, yeah.

I'm going to let them go through.

Just 20 damage.

I'm going to use my reaction as part of my fount of moonlight

and they have to make a constitution save or be blinded.

Alright, so they've got a plus zero to constitution.

These are just archers here.

So what are they trying to hit?

18.

That is a 10.

That's right.

Yeah.

So, now can I use my other two attacks?

Yeah, so now you have your other two attacks.

Because they have the blinded condition, you get advantage.

Fuck yeah.

Yeah, so these guys grab their faces as there's this flash of starfire in them.

Okay, 23 for the first, but I miss with the second one, I think, because it is 18.

18 hits.

Yeah.

Archers, they have AC of 16.

So two hits.

All right.

I'm doing two third-level smites.

Hell yes.

This is a really special moment.

I do 69 damage.

On our 69th episode, the heavens have spoken.

You break down.

Happy anniversary, everybody.

You get this Legion down to four of its original eight.

They will start doing courage checks now when they get hit.

Yeah, you've done this burst of star fire that makes them grab at their face, and you start cutting through a bunch of them.

And as you do 69 damage, you you see the little flower pops up on the battlefield on one of the dead bodies and goes, Nice.

I give it a thumbs up.

It gives you the middle finger.

Oh, yeah, dude.

All right, fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Bye-bye.

See you later.

Bye.

Pops back into the ground.

After Calliope's turn, Saul, that's your turn.

All right.

Yeah, you are around these

four power archers in this one legion.

Saul's looking a little hurt, but I think that all of the blood that he has shed and all the blood that he has caused people to shed has just caked him.

So he looks like just a red frog with bright, shining white teeth.

What the fuck?

What is this guy?

I'm a horror movie.

Oh my god.

Behold, the meteor witch, the seismic sorcerer.

How do I know?

Because I'm the weatherman, and I predict your doom.

Oh, fuck, it's a meteorologist.

The weatherman comes.

And I am going to throw caution to the wind and do four more attacks.

Hell yes.

Yeah, you just get in there bloody and beatened up and just start pounding on dudes.

Yeah, I think that all of the blood that my spores are drinking is like causing me to like glow red almost.

Jesus Christ.

Yeah, salt's turning like bioluminescence.

Yeah.

And you see, licorice is like getting the bloodlust up in the air.

We need it, right?

I finally know how to hit

22 hits.

24 hits.

20 hits.

And then just a 13.

Misses.

37 damage.

Okay, you take out another one.

And we'll say they'll do...

So you did 20 damage.

That's sort of the threshold.

That takes out another power.

And then against the remaining 17 damage, they'll do a courage check to see if this legion breaks.

Nice.

All right, they get the archers get plus zero to this.

So they need to get a 10 or higher because it's concentration rules.

13.

So they pass.

Silvery barbs.

Silvery barbs.

All right.

16.

Damn.

Would have felt nice.

Damn.

Yeah.

The dice tell their story, and the dice also sometimes just say, go fuck your story.

Sometimes the dice say nah.

Yeah, you have this super brave moment.

You kick a bunch of people's asses, and for no reason, these minions keep trying to kill you.

Poor John F.

I can still drink a little bit of their blood and get some temp HP there.

Definitely, yeah.

Yeah,

you took out some of the units within the Legion here.

Cool.

Okay.

After Saul's turn, that is the infantry legions.

They're just up on the wall.

They're just trying to get in.

32 goddamn attacks on the wall.

Wait, does Licorice go when Saul goes to?

Oh, Licorice goes.

Yeah.

What are we forgetting for you?

What are we doing?

Oh, my God.

Yeah, what would you like to do with Licorice?

So Licorice flies, and Licorice flies fast as fuck.

So Licorice can get anywhere on the battlefield we like.

I'm just gonna have him bear down on the legions trying to climb the wall and siege it.

Sweet.

So, I feel like Licorice like swoops down, it parts all of the green knights on either side, sticks his massive head like straight down, and just blasts Starfire.

Okay, so if you want to do the starfire, you did it last turn, so you gotta see if it recharges.

So, roll me a five or a six on a d6.

Okay, come on,

five.

Oh, wow, you guys are getting lucky for you.

Yes, starfire emerges as like a ball in Licorice's mouth.

You hear a bunch of the enemy knights scream as he fires down like in front of the archway that the enemy combatants have just broken down.

Wow.

Back off.

95 damage.

Wow, dude.

Oh, my God.

Okay,

that is going to take out half.

of a legion.

So the next time they get hit, they will start doing courage checks.

You've just taken out four attacks.

So yeah, I'll say you kind of clear the path in front of the archway that's just been broken down where guys are about to rush into the castle.

And now you see green knights begin to run out of the castle and begin starting to take like an offensive position, fighting some of the infantrymen up here as they rally.

I'm back to back with Saul and I'm just like, you are so fucking gop with the ground.

Really?

Yes.

I mean, I think I'm just doing what you're doing, right?

No.

I've just got to get such a good connection.

I just, I don't know.

I'm thrilled.

Again, I just think of him as my tongue, as an extension of me.

That ruins it, doesn't it?

I'm gonna

rewind and pretend I never heard that.

You see, as Saul keeps talking, Foster just starts flapping so loud next to him that you can't hear him.

Thank you.

Thank you.

I mouse to him.

After Saul's turn, that is the infantry legion's turn.

Infantry doesn't have ranged attacks, and Licorice is able to do it range, so they can't go after Licorice.

They're just gonna keep rushing at the castle walls.

Honestly, kudos.

That's kind of brave.

Kudos.

Yeah.

They're definitely kind of brave

in their own way.

28 attacks on the castle wall coming.

15 more hits, 150 damage to the castle wall.

So you do see more run in past Licorice, who is just like down perched over the gate.

And they are engaging with the green knights that are out on the front lines now.

Castle is now at 185 HP.

Basically, once the castle goes down, then the number of knights lost on the green knight side

goes up in multiples of 10.

It's like, it'll become a massacre at that point.

After the infantry legions...

That is Kenneth's turn.

Kenna's up on the wall, helping the knights.

Cavalry legions are next.

There are only two

units left in this legion.

So they are going to make two attacks and they are right there with Calder.

So they will make two attacks on Calder.

Oh, God, you should run away at this point.

We're kind of winning.

Points up at the half-destroyed wall.

But not here.

Not here.

True, too true.

But we're more about, you know, the war than the battle.

All right.

We're even the fight.

It's not the, you know, the war to the battle, the battle to the fight.

I feel like we're saying the same thing.

Yeah, one of them stabs you in the ribs.

15 damage and misses with the other attack.

We were talking.

Fuck you.

Fuck you and your snake.

After the cavalry legions, that is the siege legions.

We're dead.

Goodbye.

Yeah.

Then that is

Calder's turn.

Calder, you've got

one kind of scared cavalry legion, a half calf, if you will.

All right, cool.

Then that guy that just stabbed me in the ribs, I'm just going to like turn, step off honeysuckle, and land on the ground with a hard thud right in front of him.

Break their spirit, and I'll take three attacks.

Hell yeah.

That I hope, I hope that does it.

That's a nat 20.

I'm gonna

just give me give me that damage because you very well might kill this guy and scare the other one.

22 damage.

That for sure takes them down to one, and they will do a courage check to see if the remaining knights stay.

Need a six or higher.

And that is a nat one.

They failed.

So the one who just stabbed you with a sword in the ribs, you straight up cut his head off, and then the other knights just like pull up their horses and just begin trotting in the other direction.

I give them like a tootaloo wave, and

I missed his step back onto Honeysuckle.

Hell yes.

And you still have two more attacks, and a honeysuckle has all of his attacks.

So who would you like to go after now?

I'm going to go after that infantry that's doing all the damage to the wall.

Okay, so you do see the infantry were starting to get cocky.

There were like war horns going up and they were cheering as they were starting to take the castle.

They're treating this like a fucking tailgate.

Teach them some respect, Calder.

I put my finger in one of the war horns and I say, come on.

Come on.

What?

Come on.

Do you want a beer?

What?

Have a little class.

I thought we were partying, are we not?

People are dying.

Find out what kind of beer it is.

We're taking this castle.

Just say, I mean, just see if they're hot dogs.

It's do see one guy who's grilling hot dogs.

Hot dogs.

A garlic grilled cheese.

I'm going to kill you to give me a hot dog.

Yeah, give me a hot dog.

Calter takes a hot dog, but really what actually happens is, yeah, you see, these green knights have engaged the infantry on the front line because the castle doors have been like broken through, like these great gates.

But Licorice has backed up the green knights and breathed a bunch down onto them.

But then the bad guys have rallied.

and sent lines of infantrymen at the green knights, sort of pushing them back.

But then honeysuckle bursts out of the ground on the other side of these infantrymen who all start to scream about the beast as him and calder emerge right on uh should i roll and see if i get the earthquake back uh yeah go ahead and uh five or six you get an earthquake

that's a five patient

the heavens have spoken

he says and this time she kind of believes it uh do you want to go after a fresh legion or the one that's at four oh uh let's go after the one that's at four she's trying to decimate somebody.

All right, great.

They will go ahead and roll a check.

And I'll say, if they fail this, once you hit a certain threshold, they're just going to break.

They're just going to leave.

Okay, they fail.

It is pretty much impossible for these individual legions to save against the serpents.

And that is 75 damage.

Okay,

you fully destroy...

Three more points of power, and there's only one left in this infantry.

Literally no way for them to succeed on a courage check.

So this one is going to break.

You fully come out of the ground.

Huge seismic shift just straight up shifts the battlefield so that one of the legions of soldiers just falls off a fucking cliff into the ocean.

Oh my god.

Tailgate's over.

Can I grab a horn before they leave?

Hell yeah.

No, no, no.

You do the great honeysuckle call.

You hear cheers from the green knights up on the wall.

We're a helm honeysuckle.

Oh, and I have two more attacks, but is anybody there anymore?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

There's three more legions still.

All right, cool.

That is.

Oh, wow.

What a way to end it.

That's a two and a one on my dive.

Yeah, you spend too much time blowing the horn, get a little too cocky.

That's fair.

The horn makes you cocky.

Yeah, it makes you do stupid things.

It certainly does.

Okay.

Drink a beer through the wall.

I shout from afar.

Yeah.

I solemnly do that.

After Calder's turn, that is the end of the round, and that means the Green Knights are going to try to rally.

The DC is going to be a little bit easier this time.

The amount of legions they have going after them.

Only six legions left.

You guys have halved this army.

Crazy.

Okay, they can still roll bad, though, because Kenna gets them plus one.

So they need to get a five or higher.

They can still roll catastrophically bad.

And here's the deal.

They're at 185.

So So even if they succeed, they'll get back half their life, which is only like 90 HP.

Okay, it doesn't give them full of their total.

They just rally with what they have left.

Okay.

I mean, we can always roll bad.

Yeah, we always roll so bad and just nothing happens.

That is a nine, which is good in this case.

Okay, okay, okay.

So they do manage to pass and they get back half their life, which in this case is 93 life.

We'll take it.

We'll take it.

Okay, so they're up to 278, which is a lot better than 185.

And now that you guys are all getting closer to the wall, and as the green knights rally,

you see that up on the front lines here, now that the gate has broken down and the two serpents are on either side of the enemy line, you see that there is one halfling knight in a full green plate.

He has not unlike Calder's old helm, he has like a helm with like stag horns on it.

And he is fighting like a whirlwind, like throwing invaders off of this cliff that Honeysuckle has just created and just rallying his troops.

Looks like he was the one that led the charge once the gates went down.

And you hear a bunch of knights behind him yelling, the young stag!

The young stag!

I love this guy already.

I tried to catch his eye.

See if he's seen all the cool shit we're doing.

The lady that's glowing.

Yeah, I think he can see her.

I wonder if he's still going, Stan.

He looks up and he gives you guys a like cool guy nod.

Fuck.

Oh, shit.

I tried to do a cool guy nod back.

Go ahead and give me a performance check with advantage.

That's a 29.

Whoa.

Okay.

I out-cool Guyan.

You give an even cooler cool guy nod back.

And you see he shifts to do like an oh shit nod.

We're in, Saul.

We're in.

Nice.

What are we in?

In the good graces socially.

Okay.

After the Green Knights rally, that is back to the archers.

Okay, so there is one Legion of Archers with just three power left.

You guys are all up in the mix there.

So they're going to attack you guys with disadvantage.

They still have the condition from being hit by Callie's flash of light here.

Nice.

And I'll say there's just one attack on Saul and two attacks on Callie.

All right.

So with disadvantage, with on Saul big time, with disadvantage, with on Callie, big time.

Nothing from that Legion of Archers.

The other 16 attacks are going to keep volleying arrows at the castle walls trying to break through.

Grid it.

11 hits, 110 damage.

The wall is now at 168.

Okay.

Yeah, you see a bunch of flaming arrows go up.

Another volley.

Even though you guys are doing a ton of damage to them, they are doing a ton of damage to this castle.

And again, even if you win this battle, if the castle falls, that is a symbol of the Seeley Court that will be lost, and they might not be able to rally more allies to their cause.

After the archers, Calliope, that is your turn.

Okay, I'm going to take my first attack trying to get rid of

these archers.

Great.

Yes, there's just three power left in this one legion.

So they will do courage checks for every bit of damage.

25 hits.

Go ahead and do your damage.

Nice.

I'm going to do a third level smite.

Shit.

41 damage.

Wow.

Okay.

So DC 20 courage check.

Fail.

Not one.

They literally piss and shit themselves and run and jump into the ocean.

Now can I run to do my next two attacks on the people attacking the wall?

Yes.

So there are archers that are attacking the wall and there are three infantry legions that are.

The archers just went though, right?

The archers just went.

Yes.

So I want to go for the infantry.

That is smart.

Yeah, so you run up into the mix next to the young stag and all of these green knights that are shouting and rallying.

A 27 to hit and a 17 to hit.

17 does not hit.

I will use my luck blade.

Okay, nice.

Yeah, so you're using luck blade as offhand.

18 to hit.

18 hits.

Yes, okay, okay.

There we go.

I have a six level spell, and I'm going to use it to do a max smite, which is still technically only the full spell.

Oh, and I have a fifth level spell.

Okay, so two four level smites smites using a fifth and a sixth level.

Sweet.

79 damage.

Okay.

You take out three power,

and this infantry unit is down to five.

Okay.

So only five attacks from them next round.

Okay.

Oh, wait.

I think I have been forgetting to do some opportunity attacks as you guys approach.

Callie, as you run up to this infantry unit and engage them, they are going to get opportunity attacks.

Okay,

what was your AC at the start of the turn?

At the the start of the turn, it was 27, and then now it's 24.

Okay, so 27 is what they're trying to hit, which is going to be really hard for them to hit.

One hit on the eight attacks that they took, because it would have been all of them at the beginning of the round, for just 10 damage.

Okay, I will use my reaction again to give them the blinded condition.

Jesus.

Okay.

Another burst of starfire.

Do they do a roll?

Good God.

You have to learn your lesson.

How dare you touch her?

They fail.

Yeah.

The meteor witch.

Look not into the eyes of the meteor witch.

Would you stare at the sun?

After Calliope's turn, that is Saul's turn.

Okay, so there's two legions of archers left.

Yep, and three legions of infantry.

Okay, I'm just gonna polish off these archers best I can and then move towards the infantry.

So as you get near the archers, they get opportunity attacks on you.

Of the eight, five hits, 50 damage.

i'm all right okay

hell yeah

just this bloody mess but just gets more and more angry and turns more bioluminescent and animal like i can't even tell where he's bleeding from anymore it's just all blood

the weather man

feels like

there's gonna be horror stories like folklore based on you guys after this fight can you hear it can you hear the storm coming

He's predicting a bloodbath.

Go ahead and make your attacks.

All right, cool.

17, 20, 27, 26.

All four hit.

Hell yeah.

44 damage.

Okay, you take another two units of power away from this legion.

They are down to six.

Okay.

And now Licorice may act.

You can actually roll.

Guys, you have not gone a turn without using their breath weapons, which is fucking crazy.

Yeah, dude.

I know.

And Saul even has a mechanic where he could potentially recharge it.

He gets a re-roll once a day

if he succeeds.

All right.

Let's keep the streak alive.

Let's do it.

Fuck, four.

Okay, do you want to do the key recharge or do you want to okay?

I'll do the key recharge.

Okay, so Saul is going to spend, what is it, three key points to attempt to re-roll Lakersha's roll.

So you see, Saul, you begin to meditate and try to connect.

You see, as Saul is bloodied on the battlefield and is reaching almost this like barbarian trance where he's able to fight better as he reaches this primal self.

You see, Licorice begins to look like this great hunter.

Just like eyes begin to like narrow.

And it's not even anger.

It's just this like primordial rage.

Yeah.

I feel our hearts beating as one.

And I pour some blood into my mouth.

Oh, dude, now you're freaking me out, too.

That's a three.

Okay.

Okay.

Are wasted, but Licorice can still

do a ton of damage.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I do want to point out that the sheets Murph printed these on are stained red.

Yeah.

Yeah, they are.

That's true.

Our magenta cartridge is fucked.

Yeah.

It's thematic.

I love it.

Yeah.

Yeah, I think Licorice is just going to slither down the wall and start chomping all of these infantry down here.

Right on.

Okay, make rolls for the attacks.

I've got the damage for you.

So there's a bite, a slam, and a tail as Licorice just jumps down down and just starts attacking the front line of the enemies right

oh uh i was like oh a seven plus 17 to hit uh 24 for the bite okay so super hits uh he does 26 damage on the bite so you see uh just swallows a bunch of the infantry takes out another unit of power 31 for the slam okay 31 for the slam is no fucking joke takes out another unit and then is going to need to do a dc15 courage check they get a plus two to this so you need a 13 or higher uh and they do pass so they stick around and then um still has a tail swipe okay let's swipe it

22.

22 for sure hits uh you see tail goes up and uh hits like a row of dudes that were climbing up ladders to get onto the wall just uh knocks them off uh that does uh just 12 damage uh but they do have to just roll a flat 10 courage check to try to save uh and they pass so they stick around um after licorice does this i look up at the heavens towards the celestial snake mother and say are you proud of me mother

the scariest thing for a guy covered in blood to yell

you see the stars in the sky turn red

blood red sky tonight okay i was just as

scary before but wow what the actual fuck i do think that the heavens have an opinion about this battle red start morning soldiers take warning all right uh So that is the infantry legion's turn.

The one legion with three has no choice but to go after Licorice now because Licorice is up in the mix here.

Oh, actually, Licorice would have taken some opportunity attacks as well as he engaged with melee.

Two hits on Licorice for 20 damage.

Okay.

So a couple of them stab in before getting struck down.

And then these infantry legions are going to go.

This one Legion only has three attacks.

They are going after Licorice.

Three hits, unfortunately.

Just 30 damage.

They do 10 damage on each hit.

But he is tanking for the castle.

So that's three less attacks on the castle.

Now they get 16 attacks on the castle.

But previously, they were doing like 32.

So you got to hope if all of them hit, they can almost take down the castle walls.

So just got to hope for a couple misses here.

Yeah, real bad.

Okay.

90 damage.

Oh, my God.

Off of nine hits.

So the wall is now at 78.

So you see they are

rushing up there, but you see that more green knights are pouring out of the gates, sort of flanking them on the other side.

After the infantry legions, Kenna's up, but she's just helping the green knights.

Cavalry's dead.

Siege is dead.

Calder, that's your turn.

Come on, five or six.

Ooh, that's a four.

That's okay.

Okay.

Okay.

That's fine.

We can still do this.

We're doing this the old-fashioned way.

All right, so I'm up here with the infantry, right?

Okay.

Do you want to go after a fresh one or the one with three power left?

Let's go after the one with three power.

Great.

Okay.

So three attacks on you as they approach or three attacks on honeysuckle.

They need to get a 14 or higher to hit him because he's got 24 AC.

One hit, 10 damage.

Okay.

A bunch of them scream.

Some of them drop their weapons and stuff as Honeysuckle bounces overhead, but a few of them start to look brave and jump on, like literally like jump on honeysuckle's back and start trying to stab between the scales.

That was a huge mistake.

We serve the meteor witch and the weatherman.

So I'll let honeysuckle take all of his attacks.

That's the bite, the slam, and the tail on these guys.

Honestly, Licorice, even without the breath weapon, was still really powerful.

Oh, yeah.

For the bite.

That is a 32.

Okay, 32 hits.

I've pre-rolled their damage.

20 damage on the bite.

They're at less than half, so they have to do a courage check.

Natural seven, they fail.

So this infantry unit is broken.

Honeysuckle can take attacks now on a fresh one.

So as he bites down, you literally just see him burrow down into the ground on top of a squadron of guys, and those guys are just gone.

And there's just a hole where they were.

Wow.

I mean, I'd go home.

Did the weatherman predict this as well?

All right, so then he's got two more attacks on a fresh legion.

Yep.

We'll roll for the slam.

That is a 30 for the slam.

That hits.

That's 18 damage.

So it doesn't quite do the 20, but a little bit more damage will take out another point from this guy.

Okay, then how about we swing that big tail 27.

Okay, and the tail does 18 damage, so that's 36.

So you guys successfully take out another unit of power from this infantry line as Honeysuckle sweeps his tail around and takes out like a dozen dudes dudes with one tail swipe.

I keep on trying to blow the horn, but he's vibrating so much and fucking around that I can't bring it to my lips.

You're gonna chip a tooth.

Shit.

Colder bites the horn really well.

You don't have time for a dental appointment.

God, I hope there's a dentist in this casket.

You do see one guy fighting with

dental tools,

throwing like little hooks at people and stuff and cleaning up.

Actually, this might work.

You stay alive.

He smiles a big bright white smile and gives you a thumbs up.

Holy shit.

I'm going to jump off and fight.

I'm going to go shoulder to shoulder with him and take my three attacks.

Do you have any availability later on today?

That's an 18, a 20, and a

17.

17 doesn't other two hit.

That is 29 damage.

Okay, you take out another unit of power.

They are down to six.

And can I use one more charge from this helm?

Would you consider Honeysuckle an ally that I could command to use a melee?

I would.

Yes, definitely.

I would, yeah.

Okay, cool.

Then I just whisper to Honeysuckle, if you don't mind,

what you did was awesome.

Do you want to fuck him up again?

Yeah, I'll say he can take a bite attack with this, which is a really powerful one.

Yes.

That is a 28 to hit with his bite.

Yes, super hit hits, once again, just burrows where like 10 dudes were, and they are just gone when honeysuckle comes back up uh so takes out another unit of power they are down to five i ask the dentist uh can you do that to my teeth

uh smiles again and gives you a thumbs up

he's so friendly you don't speak his teeth are glued together i have so straight up i have been forgetting to attack with the two wiverns so i'll say

two wiverns shriek and just start just appear and start stabbing at calder and the dentist oh my god i pull my body in front of the dentist.

Okay.

So I'll just,

do they get two attacks?

I'm going to give them four because they missed last round.

So they just start stabbing into, they screech at Calder with their human face, and Calder jumps in front of the dentist to take a bunch of hits.

Stand back.

So each one's going to get two bites and two stinger attacks to make up for missing last time.

One hits with both bites.

So 18 damage total.

Okay.

They're not as strong as

a dragon or something like that.

Then takes two attacks with the stinger and hits once for 10 damage.

And then I need a DC-15 Constitution saving throw calder as it attempts to poison you.

I rolled the Nat 1, but I'll use Indomitable and roll.

Standing next to the dentist gives me strength and courage.

That's a 22.

That passes.

You just take half.

So you'd already taken 10 from the Stinger.

You take 7 poison damage.

And then the other one is going to take 2 bite attacks with its weird human face and misses twice, and then it's going to take two attacks with its stinger and hits once.

That is 11 damage and give me another constitution saving throw.

Oh my god.

Another one, but I have one more Indomitable.

Nice.

Oh, God.

And that's 25.

That aura.

The aura on this dentist.

You know, they say dental health is mental health.

That's so true.

They do say that.

They do.

The guy just goes, I do say that.

You do talk.

smile.

You do talk.

Sorry.

It's just, I don't talk on the battlefield.

That makes sense.

Yeah, not as much.

I respect it.

Usually I just do dentist stuff, but I'm having to, you know, shove my dental tools in people's eyes and stuff just because, you know, it's got to come down to that.

This is,

it's been a rough few weeks for us.

It's an ugly battle for sure.

Yeah, it's been an ugly battle.

It's been a tough few days.

A few days for sure.

Do you do veneers?

I do.

Yeah, you see, he smiles.

These are actually veneers, believe it or not.

You can do them tastefully, actually.

They're so natural.

Yeah, they're so natural.

You don't have to go big.

Yeah.

You don't have to do the big chiplets.

Yeah, you don't have to make them so square.

Nevertheless, you do them real natural.

He has a huge chip in his tooth.

You don't say.

I'll get you in.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We can get a couple of veneers in there.

Wow.

I'd love one, too.

Great.

You do radio damage with those.

So you do still take half the poison damage called or you take 13.

Okay.

Did a little bit more damage that time.

Okay.

I'm going to bonus action

second win.

Nice.

Okay.

Okay.

At the end of the round, the Green Knights are going to rally.

Pretty hard for them to fail this at this point.

There are only four guys coming at them.

Or not four guys.

Four Legion, still hundreds of enemies.

So they can still roll a...

They get a plus one of this, so they can still roll a one or a two, and it would be bad.

Other than that, they'll get half their life back, which is only 78, so they'll only get like 40 life.

All right.

No joke, that one.

No joke that one.

I knew if you picked those up, I was like, I fucking hate that, guys, and it's gonna do this.

Oh, fuck God.

Why is he allowed to roll these?

Yeah.

You see that.

Hey, could the guys stop telling their story for a second?

Yeah.

Calder,

as you are stabbed by the stinger.

You see

that an enemy Formorian with his club swings down and hits the dentist,

breaking his ribs and throwing him up against the castle walls.

What?

And you see he slumps onto the ground dead.

What?

No.

No, I go to his side.

Like,

what was

your name again with the chip tooth?

No,

I'll tell you my name over breakfast as I'm biting into a burrito with my beautiful new veneers.

Please.

I need.

I need.

What's your name?

What's your name, son?

I'm Sir Calder.

I'm Sir Calder.

Gilde.

Calder.

Calder Gilday.

Can I give you something, Calder?

Gilday,

out.

Just before I go, you're not.

One last job, please.

You're not going anywhere.

Just can I give you something?

Yeah, just gonna give you a seat.

Damn it, I don't have much time.

Tell me then.

Tell me then, you bastard.

He pulls you in close.

He reaches in.

He yanks out one of his beautiful veneers.

He reaches up.

He uses his dental tools.

This is just going to hurt for a moment.

It's going to hurt for a lifetime.

He pulls out your chipped tooth and then inserts painlessly a beautiful veneer where your chipped tooth once was.

And then he goes, another job.

Well done.

And you see the light leaves his eyes and he becomes drenched in tears.

I'm going to leave you a posthumous five-star review.

And I turn to the Femorian, and I say with a perfect smile, you're going to regret that.

You hear cheers and rallying going up amongst the Green Knights.

But at the top of the round, that is the Archer Legions.

Oh, so they are.

They were done for.

They are not done for.

There's two of them left.

So, Saul, you are tanking for the wall here.

Bring it.

The Archers are going to take six attacks on Saul.

Oh, boy.

Four hits, 40 damage.

Saul.

Saul falls for a second,

uses a key point,

kips back up, and says, there's still an hour left till the weather report.

These guys scream as they stab Saul in ways that should be fatal wounds.

And Saul, you fall back.

You feel yourself losing consciousness for a moment.

And then you feel this like fungal,

not parasite, but like symbiote inside of you kicks you back up.

I feel like a starfire pulse in my heart.

And you pop back up.

The other eight are going to continue firing onto the green knights and the wall.

Why do my teeth ache?

I don't understand.

Five hits.

Oh, that's a lot.

50 damage.

The wall is at 28.

Jesus.

Oh, no.

That is Callie's turn.

Okay.

I'm just going to go after the infantry.

Yeah, you got it.

Another 19 on the dice!

22 and 22 again.

All three hits.

Give me the damage for the first one.

See if you take out a unit of power.

And if you do, they'll have to start doing saves or this legion will be broken.

37 damage.

You fully take out another point of power.

They're down to four.

Next hit, they'll have to do

like a concentration check, but a courage check to see if they run away at this point.

Second level smite.

Great.

Burst of starfire comes from Callie's Lance.

As you're throwing like six dudes at a time with every swing.

That is 31 damage.

Okay, so they get plus two to this roll.

They have to get 13 or higher, or else they flee.

10, they fail.

Okay.

This

legion is broken.

The last half of that legion breaks off and begins retreating.

One more legion of infantry left.

They still got eight power left.

I have one attack left.

Great.

All I have left is a second level smite, but I will use my Bardic on this.

Hell yeah.

Okay.

So Callie is going all out, just pouring sweat.

You are exhausted from overuse of magic.

You see coming off of her almost like,

you know, smoke from a flame.

You see smoke from star fire emitting from her.

45 damage.

I rolled it.

Takes out another two

power from this infantry.

And I got another nine, so my AC is up to 28.

Hell yes.

Star is burning bright.

Okay.

After Callie's turn, that's Saul and Licorice's turn.

All right.

He's got two legions of archers, one with six power, one with eight, one infantry legion with six power.

Okay.

And two whiffers.

All right.

They're fine.

But they attack individuals.

They don't attack.

They're not going to be able to do damage to the wall in a proper way.

Yeah.

All right.

Yeah, Saul's teeth feel sad for some reason.

He doesn't know why.

And you see his eyes kind of gleam with the starlight.

They're kind of like turning into snake eyes a little bit.

Oh my god.

Yeah, and he's just going to launch into these archers to try to take them out.

Sick.

Go ahead and give me your attacks.

You can give them to me all at once because these guys still have more than half their legion.

Okay.

20, 15, 25,

17.

All of them hit except for the 15, which if you just embig, if you want to embig in your fist, it auto-hits because they just have 16 AC.

So even a one on the D4 doesn't running low on key, but I got to do it.

You want to do it?

Okay, sweet.

You embiggen your fist.

You're running low on your magical power.

Same thing as Cali.

You are like a fucking meteor of magical energy that's like smoke is coming out from you as there's just this hole of carnage around you.

Yeah, I think that I'm like creating my own mist around me.

Yeah.

Try to shoot arrows through these clouds.

55 damage.

Sick.

All right.

Take down another two units of power.

They are down to four.

They will need to start doing courage checks now.

And I'll say you did some overkill.

So there was 12 damage extra beyond it.

So they'll do a flat roll.

They got to get a 10 or higher or else this legion breaks.

Okay.

14.

They pass.

This legion sticks together.

That was the same dice that got in that one.

No, I can't do my.

I've already used my silvery bar.

Okay, great.

After Saul's turn, that's Licris' turn.

Okay, yeah, yeah, Licorice is gonna see if he gets his Starfire breath back.

Great,

fuck, that's a one.

That's okay.

He's still so strong.

I don't have enough key left to recharge it.

Yeah, Licorice at this point is just in the mix, just a writhing, enormous snake that is just like biting at people and snapping at them and throwing people off the wall.

Okay, Licorice, just keep freaking out.

Uh, okay, so I'll give you the attacks.

Nat 20, yay!

Oh, that's big.

Chomp, chomp.

Come on.

I have pre-rolled damage.

The bite is going to be with a crit is 46 damage.

So takes out another two of the infantry.

That brings them down to half of their power.

Each hit now will be potential to break them.

Yeah, okay.

I think when Licorice opens his mouth inside, you just see like an abyss with like a single point of light deep, deep within.

Oh, my good God.

Dudes are just screaming all over the battlefield.

That's going to be a 22 to hit.

Okay, 22 hits with the slam.

That is 18 damage from Licorice.

They will try to do they need a 8 or higher on this to succeed.

They pass, so they stick around.

All right.

Oh, you like that?

Oh, that one's too damn good.

This was the one that gave us a one, and it keeps giving you 14.

Got it, okay.

Steal it.

So one more attack, tail attack.

Yeah.

I want you to picture Saul like superimposed over Licorice, like just kind of like clinching his fist and he says, all right, Licorice, now finish with a peregrine pounce.

And Licorice just freaks out and starts wiggling.

That's the tail attack.

Another nap 20!

Whoa!

That's a peregrine.

Okay, peregrine pounce, wiggling.

Okay, on the tail attack, wow, that is, okay, 41 damage.

So you take out another two points of power,

and they will have to roll roll on 41.

Wow, they have to get a 20.

They have to get an 18 or higher for this Legion not to break.

16 they go.

Nice.

So you see a bunch of the green knights rally around the dentist

as he dies, as he passes.

They begin shouting.

You see this dude, the young stag.

People are like waving banners and stuff around him, like the flag, this like symbol of the green knights, the sun on this green banner.

and the young stag is sending back a bunch of the enemy troops and then licorice snaps down and takes out like four lines of guys and the green knights at this point are straight up like pursuing enemies on the battlefield they are now in like an offensive position yes after that

it is whippers

oh okay sure

so yeah

They just like do not get the hint and just swoop in.

Why are you still here?

Swoop in on Calder again.

He shows up so late.

Buzz off.

I'm grieving.

Hits Calder with a bite for

nine damage.

Oh, that's just rude.

And then takes a tail attack, misses.

The other one takes a bite attack and misses.

And then a tail attack and hits.

11 damage.

Give me a con saving throw, Calder.

You just get lost.

That's another 25.

Okay, 25 passes.

You just take half of the poison damage, so you take 15 damage.

Another 15.

Shoot.

Wyvern, what are you?

Wyvern, are you here?

Yeah, good point.

Okay, so that's Kenneth's turn.

Then the cavalry legions are gone.

Siege Legions are gone.

Calder, that is your turn.

All that's left is a legion and a half of archers and a honeysuckle axe on your turn.

Okay, you've got to finish them off, Calder.

Calder stares at the lifeless body of the dentist.

He says,

What's the point of this perfect new veneer?

If I'll never smile again.

He stands up,

and I coldly, joylessly go to avenge my dentist.

A 19, a 20,

and a 21.

Okay, all three are going to hit the archers.

This is a legion that is down to four attacks, but as you engage them, they pull out short swords and are going to get four attacks of opportunity as you approach.

Wow.

Three hits, actually.

30 damage.

I'm actually, the wife runs, even though I was

making light of it, did fuck me up a lot.

I'm pretty hurt.

Yeah.

So a bunch of these archers are just trying to take you out with them.

They're still a force trying to rally.

And there are commanders that are so afraid of Jovir that they're commanding their troops to continue the fight.

Okay.

Well, I've got vengeance on my mind.

I'm not going anywhere.

That is 47 damage.

Okay.

You take out another two points of power.

So they will just do a flat.

They got to get a 10 or higher to pass a courage check.

15, they pass.

So they stick around.

Okay.

There's just two of them, though.

Let's see if Honeysuckle gets that breath weapon.

Yeah.

Four.

Doesn't

so close.

But it's still pretty damn strong.

Yeah.

On the bite, that is a 20.

20 hits.

I've, again, I pre-rolled this damage.

23 damage from Honeysuckle takes out another

point of power.

They have to roll

and they fail their courage to

so this legion breaks.

There is one legion left

of eight power.

Honeysuckle yells a galactic

as he tears through the landscape here.

Calder, make your attacks on the remaining archers.

All right, I bring the horn to my lips one more time, but very, very carefully not to chip my brand new veneer.

That is a 32 on the slam.

Yep, that hits.

That is 17 damage.

Begins to take away another unit of power.

And for the tail, that is 28.

23 damage.

So between the two attacks, they take out two more points of power.

That is down to six.

And I'll use my final charge to blow that horn very carefully and ask the ask the meteor witch to make an attack.

Okay.

26 to hit.

Okay, Callie, you hit.

If you can get this infantry down, you'd have to do 40 damage.

They could flee.

Okay.

Come on.

I've got a second level smite.

I only did 28.

Okay.

You take down another unit of power then.

That is time for the Green Knights to rally.

Now, here's the thing.

They've been rolling so bad that this mechanic has not come into play.

They start taking out legions once they win by four or more.

So they could actually damage and say, they could actually save the wall here themselves by taking out these remaining legions.

I'm taking the shit dice away from you.

Okay, somebody else can roll for me if they would like.

But at this point, there are only two legions left.

They get a plus one to this roll.

So they literally cannot fail it.

Even with a nat one, they get a two.

But if they get a

six or higher, they can take out a legion.

Ooh, okay.

Okay.

Who's gonna do it?

Does anyone want to roll it?

And if they get a 10 or higher, they'll take out two legions and the battle will be over.

Eight.

Eight.

Okay.

That succeeds by more than four.

Yes.

So they take out.

Okay.

So this is going to get really close.

They get back half their life, which is 14 life.

Which brings them to...

42 life.

Okay.

They succeed enough that the young stag and his squadron get up next to the archers and fully take them out, overwhelm them so that unit of archers is gone all that is left is the five power infantry

and the green knights are all shouting and rallying uh top of the order archers are gone calliope that is you yes yeah i'm gonna attack the infantry right on

31 29 and 20.

all three hit okay yeah i'm down to first level smite okay yeah callie is just a smoking ball of nearly extinguished starfire.

I still do get to add two d6 of Radiant to each of those.

Yeah.

89 damage.

89?

Well, because it was 2d6 per hit plus the

plus 4 extra d8.

They are down to...

And then another d10 for my bardic, which I rolled a 10 on.

You got it.

Yeah.

Callie, you just...

tap into something.

You go into essentially a

paladin trance.

And when you come out of it, there is this explosion of energy that throws back nearly this whole legion.

And they need to get a Nat 20 to succeed on this courage check.

And they do not, but they get an 18, but that's not going to work.

So you break this final infantry legion.

And you see the armies of the Winter Court begin to fully retreat.

Oh,

yes.

Including the Wyverns, who at this point just screech and begin flying off.

I hug the walls.

You're standing.

Cheers go up around the castle.

You see, the green knights are embracing each other, and a few of them all run up and just give you guys hugs.

They don't know who you are, particularly, or who the serpents are, but they're just in this euphoria of they've just won this battle that seemed completely unwinnable.

I accept a hug from a stranger and then pass out in their arms.

I'm down to one first-level spell.

Wow.

Oh, my good God.

Yeah, you see, Kenna jumps down.

She jumps off one of the ladders.

You see, a bunch of the green knights have like lifted her over their shoulder and are cheering with her.

We did it.

We did it, guys.

We did it.

We did it.

How was it?

The green beast to prevail.

How was it up there?

Kind of fun, I'm not going to lie.

I did look at the hellgate.

Yeah, it's pretty sweet.

You look cool.

Will someone catch me?

Oh, whoa, I got you.

You gotta feed Callie a hot dog.

Thank you.

The only thing that can rejuvenate my spirit.

You see, the serpents settle on like nearby spires, and you guys come together, and you see a bunch of just like post-fight camaraderie.

Some of the knights are like chasing off fleeing knights and like laughing and literally tooting horns at them and stuff like that.

And you see they unfurl more banners of the summer court onto their castle.

Right on, yeah.

And there's all this revelry and everything.

And then

you

see they all start getting like a little serious and start like getting in line as you see that this one green knight with the stag horns on the side of his helm walks through a crowd.

And you hear a bunch of people just whispering, the young stag, the young stag, the young stag.

You see the knight walks over, walks up to you guys, and removes his helm.

You see a fierce halfling warrior with a square jaw, black hair, and a black mustache.

And he drops to a knee before you guys, and he goes, I do not know who you are, but if you are enemies of Jovia, then we are allies.

We are definitely enemies of Jovia.

Fierce enemies.

You see, he stands.

Big time enemies.

Stands up, offers you a hand, and goes, I am Robert, the young stag.

Clippy Petricore, Knight of the Serpent.

Calder Kilde.

Also, Knight of the Serpent.

That was perfect.

Salbufo, likewise, similarly, Knight of the Serpent.

Knight of the Serpent and the young stag.

Not bad, not bad.

Got a ring.

As he says that, you see another halfling man that looks similar to Robert, but older.

Gray mustache and gray hair.

His green armor is looking a little tight.

He pushes through the crowd

to join the young stag.

Oh, Bobby, there you are.

What?

He looks up at you guys.

If he's the young stag, then I guess I'm dear old dad.

How you guys doing?

The name's Balnor.

Oh!

You see,

this timeline's going to be a little bit more.

Bobby cries and he doesn't know why.

This timeline's Balnor, who got to grow up in the Fay Wild and lived this whole different life than the timeline he was pulled from in campaign one, reaches out to greet you, and that's where we'll end our session.

Oh,

I climb over everyone to take his hand.

Yeah,

all right on, everybody.

Taking the wow, yeah, I literally was like, went back, listened to episodes, was going on the NADPOD wiki and everything.

I was like, does the timeline work?

Does the timeline work?

Yes, Balnor could be the age he was in campaign one.

In campaign three as a different version of him.

Oh, it's incredible.

Even more of a damned.

It absolutely is buttoned up.

Sweet.

We'll talk more about this on the short rest.

We have patreon.com/slash nadpod.

That's any DDPOD.

Don't sing yet.

Does anyone don't do it?

Does anyone have anything they'd like to plug?

I mean, it feels crazy plug something right now, so I'll just do it as quickly because I get it.

I'm reading a really good book called Master of Din.

All right, check it out.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Caldwell, you got anything?

Yeah, I have one more thing.

Yeah, our friend Zach Broussard wrote a book, a like comedy horror book called Scary Stories to Make You Scared of Stories.

He and his friend.

That's really funny.

Yeah, they wrote it under the pin name The Boo Boys.

And the illustration on the front is a vampire pointing a gun at you.

That is very Zach Broussard.

He's very funny.

Awesome.

So yeah, you can check it out.

It's on Amazon.

I think you can get like a digital version or like a physical copy.

Perfect for Halloween.

Super funny stuff.

So please check that out.

Yes, check out Friend of the Show, Zach Broussard's book, Very Funny, Very Funny Guy.

Yeah.

In the meantime, you can follow us on social media that may or may not use at SageFirstMe, at Calde's Caldwell, AddieXfords Emily, and at Tracortis Jake.

And you can tweet about the show using hashtag NADPOD.

That's N-E-D-P-O-D.

We are, we are,

youth of the nation.

We are, we are, the youth of the nation.

It's the end of our episode, which means it's time to shout out our benevolent Council of Elders.

Let's get right to it.

Brad D, Jeffrey S, Lord of the Fjord.

Happy birthday, Murph.

Later, McSkater, Matt M.

Cutter W, Jeff C, Daniel G, Danielle, the dastardly dame, beard man Dan, Danny P, Carpe, Liam, Bryant, Victor T, aka Balnor's Boy, Hoyt's friend, Justin I, Danny Danster, TJM, Tre Le the Cray,

Christopher B, Damiel R.

Jordan L.

Cyborg version of Josh the Kobald.

Tar Gott, Stevie Wags, Hellish Rebuker, Ph.D.

Princess Yar,

Jory S.

Rachel from Animorphs.

Watch out, Rachel!

Jack L.

Nicholas C.

Star of Every Film Ever Made in Bohumia.

Samuel B.

Mike H.

Elka Smeltzer Plus.

Great Value, Jimma.

Tyler F.

Fighting Favorites, The Favorite Things Podcast.

Nee Badger.

Panama James.

Adrian.

Carborough Chapel Hill FPV.

Rex Thaniel, The White.

Cece Lulu.

Old Cobb's Duncle Older Byrne.

Hercules Praoto, Zerabbot Folk Detective.

Timmy R, Rayco, Calder Cum's Cold.

Shout out to the Cold Come Companions.

Frosty Facial Taylor B, the vengeful one-winged angel Cass, strong Grinch Steven, scientifically sees with ease, C.

Mike K, Lady Taco, your girl got knocked up.

A, congrats!

Nick W.

William W.

Big Bad Beardo the Mad Eric McD, Anana Rama!

Percival Frederikstein von Mussel, Kleselski der Rolo III, Jay Dragonborn, Guardian of the Vibe, Honoring the Cock.

Phoenix, Bin A.

Dave H, Dustin S.

Danny F, Hawkeye Pierce, Book Farce Assistant, Izzy F.

DPC is Awesome.

Hashtag honor the cock.

Shone, the Shady Tree Mechanic of Zebel Dar.

Summer Rose, aka Grantaire.

Kat C, Misa of House in Zunza.

Ariel, the occasional mermaid.

Selena N, aka Velasiraptor B, Perky Always

Pat L Maxwell J Lauren H, Serve 16 Annie the Fay Wild Therapist Skillful Ferret Connor S Salil BioQuirt 7 Amber Dextrous Bean Rat Was Innocent Trub Hop Dropper Jack H, King of the Mole People under Iron Deep, dressed in blue and fighting his way through a bracket-style tournament.

Lindsey W Valen Paj the bitch and bunny bard Carlin C Noah the Bullywalk Boy hashtag all

the cock

James G everything bago the Eladrin who just wants to hang out with his pet badger stripey daddy master dandy hon

Eric B, Marcos, Learns the Balance Druid Frida M, Tracy P, the Crick Elf Librarian Maggie S.

See you in Chicago, Saw you in Chicago.

Thanks for coming, Maggie.

Holly the green, laughing hyena.

Ha ha, finally caught up to Duck Team.

Akash T, Cal, just Cal.

Aaron B.

Russell H.

A monk named Dilgo.

Yes, the whole thing.

Yes, every time.

I'd never leave it out.

Don't even worry about it.

Cody C, Lorelei the succubi, and Kira the succulent snack.

McKinna S.

Your friendly neighborhood yaunt and uncle, Andrew and Sid.

John Adams, the write-in candidate for 2024.

Meg, the mail carrier manager of Bahumia.

James F.

Austin S.

Wayfarer now has to do something about the trolls.

To get rid of them, turn to page 42.

To keep him around, turn to page 69.

Shane C.

Barpo Good Barrel Bard Barian.

Welshlander.

Garrett G., aka

big curd, Havy the Half-Orc, Renee, the monster captain, Box Clifton, Olivia the Enchanting Bard, and Jared the soap opera cleric, who are playing Stick It to the Man, down with the monarchy, Winter Slade, Fico, Garrett the Artificer, Damon J, Anthony, the raddest of dudes, Josh H.

The fairies say, whoop that trick, yeet!

Haha!

Candrip Dumbledore, the bare onesie-wearing barbarian.

Lexi H.

Nodrog, the pacifist barbarian.

Gino T, Gian Luca, Tristan, the talentless honk.

Leon Kumori, legendary hero of Bohumia from a future campaign.

Shenanigans O'Connor.

Joshua S.

Alexander.

Lins W.

Angela Pamela the Forever Vindicated.

Pavu Eskenor, the Goliath Paladin providing service with a smile.

Tim M,

a cat napping in a sunbeam, listening to a podcast.

MLG Cheeto, C Jam Hampton, Shelby, Kenna's now first favorite sprite girl, manifesting return to Twank and Hot Boys in Summer 3.

AD's Winter Ski Lodge Edition.

Oof, I'm manifesting that too.

Jackson R.

Snailus, who's infecting Worcester for within.

Official Ned Flanders, Papa Scades.

Mima Scades.

Oh, it's V.

This isn't the last you've seen of me.

Tee hee!

Megan Nash, Anthony B.

Savannah H.

Balnor's best friend, Steve.

Stephanie of House in Zunza.

Benjamin A.

Gimli the Corgi, Papa and Foster's canine friend.

Mikel A.

Josh Hole, pilot of the Nightmare Verse Flight.

Please land us safely, I beg of you.

Farroki, the two crew, Blue Through, Jinnery, Ethan B.

Maple, the shy bookworm, Ashasaurus, Seth E.

Billy Batson, an emoji of what looks to be a bowl of ramen, but it's hard to tell because it's very small.

Michael L.S.

II.

Jacob, the purveyor of shenanigans, Nova Cry, Carl B., Plumber of the Realm.

Thank you for your service, Carl.

Parcel, Dex Riddlewell.

Hannah A, Ra,

Ace Dregs, High Lord of Critzburg.

Darius D, Troy's Mom.

Vin Diagram, GKC, T He Tee He

Cadmilius, the Consumed.

Bard of Holding.

Clinton P.

Spooky Cam the Undead Frog Man.

Boo.

Dean, Jake W.

Hi, Mom.

Tuesday Cross, the Choose Your Own adventure writer, not the porn star, Steve L., Alex G, Zibitabacceri, Nicole, Katerina C, Jacqueline P,

and Potato Punk.

Whew, that is all of our elders.

Thank you so, so much for your dedication and support.

If you would like to join this illustrious council, you can do so by going to patreon.com slash nadpod.

That's going to be it for us today.

We'll see you back here next week.

Bye-bye.

That was a head gum podcast.

And we're back live during a flex alert.

Oh, we're pre-cooling before 4 p.m., folks.

And that's the end of the third.

Time to set it back to 78 from 4 to 9 p.m.

What a performance by Team California.

The power is ours.