D&D Court: Cars PCs, Overly Engaged Players, and Razzing Rights

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This is a Hidgum podcast.

Welcome to Dungeon Court, everybody.

Dung.

Dung-dung.

We are your Supreme Court Justices Murphy, Axford, Tanner, and of course, the lowly bailiff, Jake Hurwitz.

Dung dung.

That's dung dung.

He's in the dung, folks.

Yeah.

He's down there.

He's rolling it up.

He's making a beautiful little ball.

Why do they make the balls?

To eat?

What are they?

I mean, why do we make balls?

We have so many sports with balls.

I think that every organism, every species is drawn.

Are they playing dung football?

Oh, man.

I would love to watch them dung ball.

That's going to be the best.

Take it away, Jay.

We're just going to gloss over the fact that it was one lowly.

You guys are talking about dung ball.

Well, we changed it up and they're like clarity to poop and stuff.

Exactly.

Yeah, okay, great.

So it's actually a lot meaner than usual.

Yeah, you're neck deep.

Hear ye, hear ye.

Crit is now in session.

The honorable supreme crit justices Axford, Murphy, and Tanner are, of course, presiding.

And our first case comes from Jeff P.

Jeff writes, Dear Your Honors and the handsome man, not a dung beetle, Jake.

Whoa, how did they know, psychic?

Incredible.

What are the lotto numbers, my friend?

I've been doing a lot of psyops online, comparing Jake to a dung beetle.

Shout out to New Haven.

I'm also from the area.

Hell yeah.

This actually happened in an apartment in New Haven, a hometown case.

Whoa.

Whoa, setting the scene.

I'm there.

I'm having pizza.

Wow.

Right?

New Haven pizza?

Isn't New Haven known for pizza?

Is it?

It sure is.

What sort of pizza?

What's their signature?

Good.

It's the pizza capital of the world.

A pizza.

What do you mean?

What do you mean?

Pizza capital of the world.

People, I feel like I've heard New Haven has good pizza.

Pizza is famous for pizza caps.

People are going to go nuts if you say shit like that.

You can't just say it's the pizza capital of the world.

I think it is.

We're going to be attacked.

Come out.

I can't be hearing about this for the first time.

I have heard of New Haven Pizza.

I've not heard it's the pizza capital of not just America, but the world.

It's so close to New York.

Yeah, it's better than New York.

It's better than New York.

Okay, let's hear what happened in this New Haven apartment while the pizza was

above Peppy's, no doubt.

I tried to DM a game for my friends, and it was one guy's first time playing, and he really wanted to be Lightning McQueen.

I tried to tell him that he can't be a literal car and offered to homebrew a Warforge shifter that could work like a transformer, but he refused and kept yelling, Kachow.

He refused?

What is Ka Chow?

That's his catchphrase.

That's Lightning McQueen's catchphrase.

Past my time.

Past my time.

Yeah.

Okay.

So, yeah, he refused and he kept yelling, Ka Chow.

I eventually gave in and let him be Lightning McQueen.

The day came to play, and I I started.

Well, this is where the mistake was.

There it is.

I actually have done enough DD chord that I actually think I pinpointed the exact moment.

We do have precedence for the DM is responsible to rein in their players to a certain extent.

Okay, let's see.

Let's see what sort of consequences you got.

Let's see how you fucked up.

The day came to play, and I started the session at the bottom of a well, and everyone needed to climb a 15-foot ladder to get out.

That's kind of a fun, interesting place to start.

Kind of boring idea.

You all are obsessed with the I actually couldn't even finish the movie.

I didn't know.

I think the born identity, doesn't it start with him in the ocean?

Yeah.

I mean, if you're looking for like the closest comparison, I guess it's like the third Batman movie.

Because he gets thrown in a well in that movie, doesn't he?

And he has to climb out.

I don't know if I've seen that one.

Okay, so it's more like born, yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

The day came to play, and I started the session at the bottom of this well.

Everyone needed to climb a 15-foot ladder to get out.

And obviously, a car cannot climb a ladder.

So I narrated him being stuck and slowly rusting away.

Oh,

okay, so you tried to kill him.

I guess that really killed the mood because no one wanted to play after that.

Yeah, and the group quickly dissolved, and they have never asked me to DM or play with them again.

Was I wrong for killing off Lightning McQueen as soon as the session started?

You may have the best pizza in the world, but you don't have the best judgment in the world.

It's definitely not the DD capital in the world.

I've never been to New Haven, but I'll cede the title to you: The best of pizza in the world.

Let me give you a pizza, my mind.

Yeah.

Nice.

Yeah, I do think you should have right away if someone's just insisting on being a character from another property.

That has nothing to do with it.

I guess, look, if someone was like really not creative and they're like, I need to be Aragorn, if it's just a home game, at a certain point, I would just be like, sure, you're Aragorn.

Great.

Let's play.

You're Aragorn and you're going to Neverwinter.

Awesome.

Sick.

But Lightning McQueen, you allowed this at your table.

What What do you do?

And then when they couldn't do anything, they got mad.

You kind of had to know this was going to happen.

Yeah, this seems like kind of like you started with what should have been the third session reaction to the fact that everyone was annoyed to be playing with Lightning McQueen.

Yeah.

But I guess it goes, it proves something that the players disbanded, but also did not try to help Lightning McQueen.

I don't know.

Well, they probably did.

They probably just couldn't, as level one characters or whatever, lift a car out.

I guess it's, well, I mean, you got to think like, so I hate to get into like the physics of it because we shouldn't because it's DD, but like if they had strong ropes, they could Lightning McQueen could grasp them in his teeth because he's got mechanical teeth,

and then he could use his tires to like pull himself up.

I think that if you've got Lightning McQueen could get out of a way, I was going to ask you, like, if you've watched all the cars' properties, like he never climbs anything.

Well, I think it's mostly a ramp-based society, yeah.

Okay, I mean, you can just floor it straight up the side of the well, maybe.

Yeah, doesn't he ride up a wall like he's

a here or there well the well's probably not big enough for him to get up enough speed to like drive around the circle of the wall right okay so that's how he usually ascends i think that he could definitely could chow his way up the wall like if he had enough time to build up speed i'm just saying as someone who knows nothing about cars other than the absolute awesome cars ride radiator springs at disneyland i think lightning mcqueen could get out of a freaking well i guess i think that like if all of the players were trying to work together to get lightning mcqueen out of the well just as a DM, you would be like, all right, fine, I'm going to let him out of the well.

You guys are creative and engaged.

They gave up pretty quick.

Yeah.

Or they didn't give up.

Maybe their whole session was just trying to get Lightning McQueen out.

It was clear the DM was intent on killing Lightning McQueen.

They're just like, we actually don't want to play anymore.

I think you answered yourself.

You said, no one wants to play with me again.

I think that you know that, you know, maybe it didn't work out.

And I think if you want to DM for them again, you're going to have to work for it.

I think, yeah, because if you look into your heart, you planned this session to kill Lightning McQueen and not to give your players a great time.

Yeah.

Which I think in the past, we might have given the advice to make the game to kill Lightning McQueen.

But we've softened.

We've softened.

Well, no, I actually think we would have given that advice when it's like, my friend's been playing Lightning McQueen and everyone's hit.

Yeah, yeah, you're right.

And then we're like, here's killing Lightning McQueen, you know, like 20 sessions in after Lightning McQueen's been super annoying.

First off, just don't let Lightning McQueen in your game.

Yeah.

you had to draw the line.

If someone was like, I want to play a car, I would just be like, that's great.

You, by all means, go find another DM and they'll run a cars campaign for you.

That's all.

Go play for Zimotor Sport.

If you agree to let that person play that character, you do have to like run the game, right?

Caldwell, what would Lightning McQueen be as a

class?

What would his class be?

Subclass.

That's a great question.

I feel like, you know, doing a homebrew Warforge seems fun, but maybe even the closer thing would be like

a Minotaur.

Like, you could skin it from a Minotaur, I think, because of the speed there.

And then does he, like, is he a magical guy or is he a melee guy?

I think he's like a rogue, but like, he's kind of a sweet talker, I would say.

Woo!

Because he's definitely like a persuader.

He's a bit of a mastermind.

Yeah, maybe a mastermind rogue.

And he's laying on the charm.

He's got a great speech.

Wow.

So then is he not a bard?

He could, you know what?

He's a bard, but I feel like I think Rogue has the speed is what I'm getting at.

He's got to have the speed and maneuverability, especially after Doc Hudson teaches teaches them how to go around those tight turns.

Of course, in Radiator Springs.

Okay, and with that, so I think we are setting the precedent that at some point the DM does have to rein in their insane players and not let people come to their house at a certain point.

Hey, we're going to rule against a submitter.

We're going to have to rule against a submitter.

We're breaking.

Yeah.

Not so soft anymore.

Not so soft, are we?

Not so soft anymore.

So I do, I like the idea of having Lightning McQueen in your campaign, but like as a big DM prize, like imagine how funny it would be if like you're hunting for something, you've been like given a quest to like hunt down this mythical beast, and it turns out to just be a race car, and you've just got to find out how to kill a race car.

Yeah, I do feel like you need to do a lot of cars research now, yeah, because you have weirdly, as much as we don't like this Lightning McQueen player, yeah, that you did agree to do this, so I now I do think you have to build like a full cars world, so you got to go cars one, cars two, cars three, cars, planes, and rescue.

Uh, you're gonna do cars, Fire Force, I believe, is one of them.

That's the one where,

yeah, that's the one where Dane Cook plays the main character.

So, you're gonna want to check out all those as well.

Really?

Okay, yeah.

Another alternative punishment could be that you have to go to Italy with a shirt that says New Haven is a pizza capital of the world.

They'll agree.

They will agree.

Yeah.

Might be interesting.

Might be interesting.

So ordered.

Our next case comes from Thrawn.

Greetings, oh, wise Justices and Electable.

The Grand Admiral himself?

Shut up, dude.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Is that a Star Wars reference?

Yeah.

Oh, Jay can talk about obits all he wants, but as soon as I talk about...

I actually couldn't without you jumping down my throat.

Greetings to the O Wise Justices and the Electable Bailiff.

Not sure what that means.

I am running a homebrew campaign where the very first thing the party noticed in session zero was that their memories had been wiped.

A la born.

Oh my god.

Why does this keep going up?

It's getting a real bourne vibe.

The more you dislike born, the more I don't dislike born.

It's just like the least nostalgic time is like that area of just like these A-list actors in movies as streaming started to come out.

And it's just like we all started to find our little niches that we liked and everything.

So to just be like, man, the top movie of 2005 or whatever.

Why can't you celebrate the end of monoculture with us?

It was Jason Bourne.

He was Jason Bourne.

Bourne has to be in the Nadpod Shitiverse, actually.

Yeah, I think you can try and fight it, but Jason Bourne is on the plane.

Fuck Jason.

Jason's on the

borne having to take down all of the nadpod shitiverse characters.

Wow.

All the memories had been wiped.

For the last seven months, they've been in the campaign with retrieving their memories as their top priority.

They just discovered that they have actually been living inside of a time loop, much like Groundhog Day, except everything is controlled by a wizard who is using it to achieve immortality.

Oh, sick.

This is a lot for you to be juggling.

Everything went off without a hitch and exactly according to plan, which is good because I swiftly realized how many ways this concept could be spoiled for my plans.

However, now that they have figured out the mystery, my players are finding holes in my time traveling logic.

I would say 98% of their questions have a very good, firm explanation that I worked out.

However, there are at least a couple of points where I have had to say, I don't know, man.

He's a time traveler wizard.

It's time magic.

Don't think too hard.

Yeah.

Well, that's the problem with time magic is like if you want to introduce it as a DM, you have to introduce it in a way that players can interact with it.

Yeah.

The problem with the time, I think a time loop version of it means that everything has already happened.

So like the per you essentially you can't change the future, right?

that would be like a time loop yeah you're trying to break the cycle of the time right but i think that like you can't right yeah like all of that stuff has already happened so that type of time travel is way harder yeah than the guy goes back in time yeah creates a new thing because then yeah doesn't know what's gonna happen necessarily yeah just go from there and when time travel is the thing that you as a player are trying to solve then you are gonna be asking a ton of annoying questions about it yeah right like it's built into it but go on jake what what ends up going wrong i feel fairly proud of myself for being able to keep a time travel campaign on track for seven months while keeping it a secret from my table.

Yeah, seriously, you should.

But at what point can I just use its magic as an explanation without it being a cop-out?

Hmm.

I wonder if you can like incorporate that into the plot a little bit, like where these holes are like holes in like the reality that this lich has created.

Oh, I love that.

All the holes they bring up, you say, yeah, you're right.

That is a weak spot.

Right.

That's kind of cool because then it's like a human imperfection.

This

didn't get everything perfect.

I mean, that's a fun review.

If they are, if you are just reflecting on this campaign that's already done, which it sounds like that might be it, like you're great.

You're good.

It sounds like it was fun.

Yeah.

If you are still running this, I do think a later reveal could be that it's not a loop, that there is like a new timeline being created.

And thus, these little inconsistencies that they're picking up are ways the world can change.

Yeah.

That opens up like new possibilities.

Branches that they couldn't prune.

Yeah.

Unfortunately, we do have to punish you because you fucked up a little bit.

I mean, honestly, you like were juggling to incredibly difficult high-concept things in addition to DMing.

Yeah.

I remember there was like kudos.

Yeah.

My problem with that type of time travel where it's just all of the stuff has already happened is that the whole story ends up being kind of pointless because you're just like, everyone is just doing the thing that they have to do.

Like there was that show that was really good, but after after a certain point, I lost interest in it.

Did you guys watch that show, Dark?

I think it was called?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I watched all of it.

Yeah.

So you watch Dark and you're just like, oh, this is hopeless.

So fun.

Like the main character, spoiler alert, it's like, he's the bad guy from the future.

He's just like, okay, so he becomes that.

And that's,

yeah, that's that.

I think it could work, though, for a D ⁇ D campaign because the time loop things that work well are when the characters are changing within it.

So it does feel like it could work for a D ⁇ D campaign, but it does, the second the time loop becomes the problem, then your players are going to try to solve it.

And so you're going to start getting asked annoying questions.

Yeah, that's true.

Yeah, you can't just fully trap them in there without a way out or without allowing to them explore their way.

IMO, perfect time travel is future trunks from Dragon Ball Z.

Comes back to the timeline.

He helps, but he also fucks a bunch of stuff up.

The time is not a loop.

This timeline is completely different than his own.

And then he goes back to his own timeline later, but he ends up helping save the current timeline.

When he arrives, are Bulma and Vegeta together at the

Si, Mom and Dad?

I'm trying to say that.

No, he tries to not affect it.

So he's like,

That's what it is.

Okay.

That was actually a big spoiler.

Sorry.

Everyone knows that Trunks is bigger than Dark.

Yeah.

Did you know that, Jake?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, it was almost if level, as far as spoilers go.

Yeah.

Not quite.

I remember being pretty surprised by it.

I didn't realize that there was like a Back to the Future thing going on with Trunks and the DBZ saga.

That's very funny.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So Back to the Future.

Honestly, probably a clearer example of in Back to the Future.

That one I think you can change it.

Yeah.

I think like the way you do it is like you, like you have this event that you reference a bunch, and then like that's the fun reveals that the players actually get to go to that event and like actually affect how the world changes.

And then like they get to go to the present and see like what they've changed.

It's awkward enough time.

I do love though the thing that Carlwell suggested, which kind of gives you an out of the loop, which is like when they start to ask and there's inconsistencies, you could be like, that might be a weak spot.

You should go to that moment, that place,

and see.

And then when they go there, you're like, oh, something's kind of fucked up.

And then they can, there's like a glitch and then they can kind of like go somewhere else via.

Because even, isn't Back to the Future also kind of both?

types of time travel where like he invents rock and roll.

Yeah.

So like there is a time loop.

Like he like someone goes back in time and invents the thing that they, you know, whatever.

Yeah.

Uh, so it had always been there or whatever, but then also, like, he can change the past or the future depending on what he does.

Yeah, so that just shows how sloppy all of this shit is.

Like, the number one time travel thing is pretty inconsistent with its rules.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Embrace the holes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think you can embrace the holes without like dismissing the arguments.

Like if people are asking, you don't have to be like, I don't know, we're not going to, we're not going to discuss it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Learn to love the hole.

I would, I would argue that you should usually not do the like loop, everything has already happened, start a branching timeline.

That being said, if it worked, if 98% of it,

if 98% of it, that's crazy.

You're good.

Yeah.

So I think we'll rule in favor of you that it wasn't essentially, it's just tough.

It's not really pitting two people against each other.

It's just you asked if it was okay, and I think it was.

Yeah.

I think you're good.

Sounds like if it worked for seven months and you know, like the jig is up.

Let them out of the loop.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Tell them to watch.

So we'll punish your player slightly, not with a real punishment.

We'll have them watch Back to the Future and see that you can change stuff.

But there's also.

But the Back to the Future car is now Lightning McQueen.

There you go.

Oh, that's right.

Yeah.

That's actually, that's so good.

That's so fun.

That's really good.

Wow, wear two, Professor.

Is it Owen Wilson?

Yeah, that's awesome.

So cool.

Oh, that's why people like it so much.

Yeah.

I mean, when he says the Kachow, it's just like it's got that classic Owen Wilson.

Kachow.

Kachow.

Kachow.

It's really good.

It's Awesome.

Can you imagine how sick must it be to get that kind of role where you're just like sitting in a VO booth and you just make the hugest movies ever?

Just get that cars money.

You just get that freaking cars money, dude.

The cars check in your mailbox.

Yeah, build a VO booth in my basement.

Put it in my pool house.

I'm never going to have to leave my property.

Yeah.

I'm lightning the queen of Kachow.

More like Kaching.

Hello.

Okay, so Kachortered.

Our next case comes from Weary Wayfarer.

To the honorable Crit Court, I run an IRL pirate campaign with a bunch of random strangers I recruited online when I moved to a new city.

Oh, cool.

Whoa.

Yeah, that is really brave.

Hell yeah.

There is an engaged couple in my group who are a problem.

I heard engaged and I thought engrossed in the story, but now I understand.

They're engrossed in each other.

Maybe, maybe both.

Maybe both.

Emily and I are engaged in the story, but married.

They are constantly doing PDA at the table.

Oh, no.

And not just a quick cheek kiss or theater kid hand squeeze.

They are biting each other's shoulders, getting up and flopping onto the other.

And they want to romance each other in game.

Okay.

And also almost exclusively talk to only each other in game, unless I force a scene where one has to interact with another player.

Rude.

My other players and myself are weirded out, but the issue is we use their maps for the campaign.

The couple gifted the maps to me.

And I feel like that critical part of our game keeps me from calling them out.

Justices and bailiff joke.

Am I in the wrong for accepting this gift in the first place or for not being firm and telling them to knock it off?

Or is it on them for not understanding that DD time isn't date night?

I think it's definitely on them, but I don't know that they're going to realize it.

So I do wonder if you just sent them a text and said,

Would you guys interact with the other characters a little more?

Because I think that sort of the collaborative aspect of it, like usually in DD, you're a party, and I want to make sure that we have that party feel.

May I light up and be like, hey, we're all really lonely and sad.

Yeah, you guys are so special and engaged, and we do see that your love is actually so awesome.

Your love is so true.

I do think M has a great point here, which is to keep the focus on that.

You can definitely tell people people to tone down the PDA and stuff.

As like, I don't know, if I'm new in town and I just made a bunch of friends and I'm like hosting people and like a couple is kind of being like kissy and stuff, I don't know that I would necessarily have the guts to be like, hey, knock it off.

I don't want to see that.

Cool, kids.

Yeah, I would just be like, say, get a room.

Yeah.

Get a room on this map that you provided us.

Yeah.

So I think keeping the focus on, I think if you say this one thing that is very DD focused, which is like hey just like something i noticed you guys kind of interact more with each other just make sure you know like as a table we're all playing together and that might even make the pda happen less because they'll be less locked in on each other their characters are flirting with each other less these people are gonna burn out yeah

this love is gonna burn out if you're like if you're going this hard and like even when you're just playing d and d together you're like have to romance each other like you just have a personality outside of your relationship.

I wonder how long they've been together.

But the fact that they're engaged, I'm like, are these people in like a three-year relationship and they're still just like, I can't not grab you while we're playing DD?

Are they a problem or are they goals?

Yeah.

I think that they're going too hard.

They're going too hard.

I'm telling them, you're going to burn out.

Right.

If you make your relationship your everything, you'll have nothing.

What do we think about just like trying to like call attention to it more?

And everyone does kind of like a sitcom woo woo woo and they clap.

Oh, but you could get someone with a really good two fingers in the mouth whistle.

Yeah.

This is

such a bad thing.

Can any of you guys do that?

I can't.

I can't.

No.

No, but I need to watch a YouTube video.

Yeah.

I can turn my face into a wolf though.

Really?

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's audio, so you can't see it, but I did transform into a wolf.

Yeah, your lips really did look very cartoony.

Yeah, I'm bleeding from the gums now.

That's my teeth retract.

M's trying to do the finger whistle.

Terrible for audio.

I thought that was great.

My ears are killing me.

That was so loud.

For sure, none of us can do it.

Yeah, if any of us could do it, it would be Caldwell and he can't.

I did it at a frequency that only bats could hear.

You hurt my dog ears when you did that.

Yeah.

I do worry that the hooting and hollering could have adverse effects because this does sound theater kid to me because they're like biting each other and stuff.

So there is like, I'm getting raw lol so red

here, kind of like just want to eat you.

Like, eat you, you know?

Very

a little bit of chomp going on.

Yeah,

chomp, yeah.

Right.

So, like, yeah, maybe ignoring it, if that's the case.

They already are ignoring it.

Yeah.

I think that your only chance is to reach out and be like, hey, I love that you guys feel comfortable like playing with each other, but I do really want this to feel like a party.

So I was wondering if you would sort of take some of that energy and spread it around the table.

And I think you can.

What if you just do a different seating arrangement?

No, because you can't have a seating arrangement.

No, it's IRL.

It's IRL.

It's IRL.

But you can't do a seating arrangement at, you know what?

That's also an effect of this is that because it is, I forgot that this is a bunch of people that they met in a new town.

So they probably also don't know the other people as much.

Yeah.

What if, here's a crazy thought.

What if there's...

What if you guys did?

No, it's impossible.

I was going to say, maybe you guys have a night where you don't play D ⁇ D so that you could try and get them to sit down.

Oh, no, they're going to, they're going to

actually

hump on your ass.

I do think, first off, you'd be in your right to call it the PDA.

If you don't want to, though, I would be uh feel too awkward about it, so I might not, uh, which is why I would have a hard time giving you that advice.

I do think, though, you can, as the DM, say, like Emily said, um, try to get people to interact more outside of the people that they already know.

And then, in addition to that, I do think you could be like just a vague message that's like, hey, guys, as I DM, if there could be like less like texting or looking at your phone or like little interactions or things like that.

I mean, that always feels tough to send out.

I wouldn't do it.

I would focus on like asking them to engage with other people.

Like it's a favor to everyone else.

But also, you know what you could do is have a mission that splits everyone up into little groups, but have them roll for it at the table.

And just like again, they all get split up into pairs and just hope that the dice favor you.

Yeah.

Just hope that the dice.

So then they will think that you didn't split us up.

The dice split us up.

Oh, okay.

Or you could just do it behind the screen and have plausible deniability and be like, I'm going to roll to see which party ends up where.

I think the dice would be on your side.

It's just like, you know, like.

And if you have to fudge it just right into Dice Christ's confession,

we'll heal you.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We'll absolve you.

Yeah.

You make a donation.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It does, it does feel bad because like these people are really really goals.

It's Lightning Queen and Sally Carrera.

I don't think they're goals.

That's what I'm saying.

Is like, I feel like when there's that much PDA, there's like a secret instability or something.

But maybe I'm like.

The biting and stuff.

I'm just getting a particular type of couple.

Much like Lightning and Sally, they're just going fast.

Yeah.

That's why I'm like, you guys have been together for three months and you got engaged at four months.

That's a good idea.

Honestly,

Murph and I got engaged pretty quickly, so I can't really talk.

I think it was a year.

I've never like fully, I've never fully romanced you at a as a PC to a PC yeah I don't think so yeah no love is a highway guys yeah

so yeah so I think we're gonna obviously rule in favor of you and I understand this is a tough position to be in you moved to like a new city and then you're hosting all these people

it is tough you do need to tread carefully because you you know you want to meet new people you want friends so it's easy for us usually to just be like fuck these people get new friends but i get that they're hard to come by yeah you're trying to get new friends yeah we're actively trying and they're building maps so we do have to you do have to give them some credit there's also a chance that as time goes on because i think like everyone here is strangers like these this couple is clearly like they're just um turning in on each other because like they're the only people that are at the table.

So I think like as everyone gets to be more friendly with each other, if you do this idea of splitting them up, I think that like everyone will warm up to each other and maybe this will be less of a house.

Yeah, initiate scenes.

Everyone's going to be biting everyone's shoulders this morning.

Yeah.

And if nothing else, like like you and the rest of the people that aren't the shoulder-biting, flopping couple are going to be bonded over how uncomfortable it is to be around this couple.

So you might end up having deeper friendships.

Yeah.

So good luck to you.

We do have to punish the couple.

We have to punish this couple.

Right.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah.

Easiest thing is just that they have to break up.

Right.

Yeah.

Do they have to have a cars-themed divorce party?

Whoa.

Does that make sense?

Or a cars-themed wedding.

How about a cars-themed wedding?

Uh-huh.

They can be together.

Cars-themed wedding.

She has to drive down the aisle.

Their officiant has to do an Owen Wilson voice the whole time.

Yeah.

Okay.

Or if we get Larry the Cable Guy.

Ooh.

No, because this has to be a punishment for like.

Larry the Cable Guy rocks.

But the extended family might like that.

That's true.

I'm saying.

Dude, if fucking Toe Mater was there.

I've been ordained online.

A lot of jokes.

Having some random person try to do an Owen Wilson impression for your entire wedding would really really alienate the extended family.

Yeah, that makes sense.

Okay.

So you have to hire Larry the Cape.

Oh, and then there's tie-in with wedding crashers, and you have to explain the confusing wedding crashers slash Lightning McQueen theming of your wedding.

Oh, as part of the vow.

Yeah, as part of the vow.

No, but also the invitation that you send out will be a picture of Lightning McQueen in bed with a random woman.

Knowing that he met at a wedding.

Wedding racers.

Yeah, wedding racing crashers.

Or they could be wedding crashers, but car crash in print.

Yeah, and then, yeah.

And then maybe there's like a tag that's like, we're racing down the aisle.

Yeah, Kachow.

Like the Queen, he runs into various weddings,

ruins them.

And then

that's kind of like the inciting incident of the movie of the Wedding Crashers reboot.

Yes, he crashes into weddings.

He like bowls down walls as a car and destroys weddings.

So like, is he like a wedding assassin?

Is he sent by like jealous exes?

Is that kind of what's going on here?

I think he's just such a wild man that he crashes into weddings.

One of the wild things about this show is that, like, properties I knew nothing about, I end up developing fake lore about, and then I forget that it's not the real lore.

I, I, my only knowledge,

if you watch cars, my only knowledge of cars is from Radiator Springs, and I have ridden that ride.

I mean, I think they give you like a pretty good summary of the lore, though.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We met Tomator, we know all about him.

You know all about Tomator.

Yes, okay.

Uh, with that, let's wrap that one up.

Okay, okay so ka-chowdered so ka chowdered

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Jonathan F.

Wow.

Writes, admirable justices and noticeable bailiff.

Thanks.

There it is.

I am here to plead not guilty for dividing my party against Jonathan.

This is interesting.

Have we had a plea issued before?

This is the hot spice we've been needing.

Okay, okay.

My party is made up of all co-workers.

One player.

has become the default main character of our campaign because of the exciting and emotionally rich energy he brings to his character.

Okay.

But I think he is now resented by the rest of the party.

It came to a head when he, a wild magic sorcerer, rolled a wish spell on the wild magic table.

As he didn't understand that level of power, I asked him how he felt in that moment.

When the power surged, he gave an emotional refrain that tied to his backstory, and I increased his charisma and altered the fight in his favor.

He was ecstatic.

My other players, not so much.

The next day at work, another player told me he didn't like how I favorite the sorcerer.

The other players aren't talking to me or the sorcerer, even at work.

It's actually starting to affect our productivity in the whole place.

Apparently, they find his passion annoying and just want more puzzles.

Justices, I ask for your mercy and your counsel on how to proceed.

Whoa.

This is a tough one.

Is this what my bank deposits are haven't been going through?

I think that beyond this, there's also like a clash of play style.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This sounds like this one, the sorcerer, is sort of coming from like the actual play community and is like playing a more role play-heavy thing.

And that's kind of what you want to play, maybe.

And then these other people are just wanting to do encounters and stuff.

Yeah.

I think this is a really tough one because if someone is, if you're admitting that someone is the main character,

then you might not be going out of your way to include the other players, which isn't good.

But at the same time, not talking to someone.

Mm-hmm.

I'm trying to say that.

They did pretty directly say that they didn't like how the one character was being favored.

One person said that.

The other people aren't talking to the DM.

Well, it seems like they're not talking at the table either.

Yeah.

Oh, that's true.

Yeah.

They're all being quiet cousins.

These freaking turds are.

Yeah.

I do think you could be doing a little more as the DM to like try and highlight those people.

It's hard bringing people out of their shells like that.

You know, you got to ask questions.

I feel like maybe, and it's tough because it does seem like they enjoy the encounter aspect of it, maybe not the like the role-playing part.

But I guess you got to like find the sort of role play that they like because it does seem like this sorcerer really likes the kind of dramatic speech where they're like talking about their convictions and what they believe.

Yeah.

But like, I don't know, my favorite role play scenes are when like everyone's trying to figure out like how you're going to sleep in a bed together.

Yeah,

yeah, just the bed Tetris.

It's

I feel like a lot of DD, like there's a lot of different

play styles and different things that like draw everyone to the table.

And I feel like you're always just trying to have it be like a potluck of all that.

And maybe right now it's not feeling right.

I definitely understand.

DMing is kind of like hosting, right?

It's like, okay, I see you're happy.

Now what can I do to make you happy?

Okay, you seem happy.

Now what can I do to make you happy?

And I mean, they said what they wanted, which is fair too.

They said, we want more puzzles.

But it is, it's strange that people are like mad in real life.

I almost understand.

The one person that's like, I kind of don't like that this is, even though it seems like kind of, I don't know, mean or something to be like, I don't like that that person got a wish spell or how like they're the main character or something like that.

By the way, the person rolled it, so it is random.

Yeah, exactly.

It's random for sure.

Yeah, but it does sound like, I mean, even this, the submitter is admitting that this person is kind of the main character.

Yeah, which is, it's a, it is a problem, and it does kind of tell you something, even though I do think it's wild to get mad at your friends about DD IRL when it comes to something like this, where it's not like an actual interpersonal argument.

The generous read would be like they're looking for something in DND.

They're looking for like an escape or something.

Yeah,

or something.

I don't know.

I'm just trying to go back to like familiar dynamics of like being overlooked or something like that.

But I will say the fact that like two or three people, everyone else at the table comes out of these sessions being like, I didn't like this.

That's not good.

I think what you got to do is you got to work with this player a little more to bring the other players in.

Maybe like confide in them because clearly they've got that spark.

they want to perform and they want to like ham it up a little bit but be like hey like i think it'd be really cool if like you and this person did a scene or if like you kind of like teamed up with them on this or kind of like try and give them like opportunities to uh work with the other players honestly if you're the dm's pet what you should really be doing is doing like um almost like sous chefing for the dm right like let me ask this character a question so that the dm then knows about their backstory so i have a lot of money tied up in your company and like if the productivity goes down then I'm fucked.

Okay.

Yeah.

I've put a lot of money.

I'm worried about that productivity.

I do think as the DM, you are responsible to like, if you see people not in, if, if there are people that are at the table that do want to engage in parts of the games and you're not

appealing to that side of it, you are kind of setting yourself up for failure to a certain extent.

Or maybe, you know, expectations were not set correctly.

Maybe this table just needs to break up.

Maybe you need a more roleplay-focused table.

I was thinking that it's so interesting that it feels like they're not talking to you, but everyone's still showing up for sessions.

Merck, if you break up the table, you're in a tank Q4, man.

Yeah, that's true.

If

you all are still friends and stuff, my advice to you would just be to put more puzzles and stuff in.

If one person is the main character, there might just be somebody who's a better actor, or they might just be more outgoing.

Or, I mean, ungenerous read.

Oh, maybe this player is actually annoying.

Yeah.

And the DM could, like, and

the thing is, it was so easy to picture it in a way that it would be annoying.

Right?

Yeah.

So there's the possibility that they're just the most engaged and they are the best storyteller and the best actor.

And there is another world where the submitter and this player are doing this big thing,

essentially like, I don't know, like writing emotional checks that they can't cash.

Like there's like, these moments don't need to be as big or they're always going big or, you know,

I can very clearly see.

Yeah.

I can see a scene where like this person is monologuing and everyone's just going to like check in their exactly.

It's just like I am the anime protagonist and the DM is writing me my own personal manga and everyone else is just sitting there.

You gotta make that shit My Hero Academia.

You gotta balance it.

You gotta make Deco's the main character, obviously, but we're hearing a lot about everyone else.

Oravity's up in the mix.

We're hearing about Froppy non-stop.

Don't worry about it.

Okay, so I think we should sentence you to watch My Hero Academia.

Yes, you need to get in the back of a Lightning McQueen Uber and watch all of.

Oh, wow.

They all have Lightning McQueen Ubers.

They could.

There's one.

It's so rare.

If they did the self-driving car.

That's so dangerous.

That's Lightning Billy.

Self-driving Lightning McQueens with own Westville.

Such a liability for that.

I think it's a good thing.

And just take a crash.

You're joking.

Of course.

You're incidentally crashing.

I wish I wasn't joking.

I know what my wish spell would be.

Yeah, you do have to ride a Lightning McQueen Uber into a wedding, I think, is your punishment.

Okay.

I think there's a...

Here's the thing.

I actually don't feel

this one is really hard to come down on because I do think that the players seem to be overreacting.

You know, like getting mad and like not being able to do your job because you're pissed about DD is pretty strange.

Yeah, yeah.

But on the other hand, I do think if you're sort of the fault comes with the initial acknowledgement that you've made somebody the main character.

Yeah, I don't think that this wish, it sounds like this was just a cool moment, but maybe it was the straw that broke the camel's back.

You've already made this person the main character.

Your player's punishment doesn't fit the crime, but that doesn't mean a crime wasn't committed.

Yeah, I think we're being a little hard in the DM here, but at the same time, you do have to ride a Lightning Queen Uber through a wedding.

And you know what?

A lot of times I will take a car over here because my wife needs our car.

So I'll just like, I will take an Uber to record when I'm DMing.

And that's a little extra time I use to think and prep.

And you could be doing that in the Lightning Queen Uber on your way to crash into some great.

Can I tell you, as also coming from a one-car household,

when I have to take an Uber and I get to just watch something on my iPad in the back, that's fun.

Here's a great time, a great surprise round, Caldwell.

You're about to get an Uber.

You're about to get an Uber to come record NADP.

Right.

Okay.

Okay.

You see that your Uber driver is Owen.

It just says Owen.

And there's a picture.

It's super pixelated, but you could have sworn it's a certain blonde actor that

you're familiar with.

You're already running a little bit late.

Lightning McQueen car pulls up.

No driver.

No driver.

But the voice with an Owen Wilson voice says,

Ka-Chow.

Hey, bud.

I'm here to take you on your way.

Sponsored by Disney Plus.

You get in the car.

I snap a profile selfie,

send it to everyone I know, both as a brag and as insurance.

Someone tell me if I'm not supposed to do this.

That's so funny though, to send it to send it to different group texts with a different some group texts.

You're like, LOL, look at this.

And then other ones, you're like, can you believe

the lottery I won today?

Yeah, some people it's lol look at this.

Some people it's like, holy shit, Lightning McQueen.

And then a third group is like, if I die, here's where I am.

Yeah.

So you do, you do get in.

I get in.

But he sends up a responsible amount of text.

Yeah.

And like, I think I get in, and then I get a little nervous when Lightning McQueen's like, huh, there's like three weddings near here.

Just the idea of Caldwell in the back of a car, just hands so sweaty, clutching the armrest as Lightning McQueen zips him through the city, just barrels towards a bar and wedding.

God damn it.

All right, let's move on.

So chowdered.

Okay, our next case comes from Abigail L.

Thus I lay this case in your capable hands.

Wow.

My players and I have all agreed you should decide who has razzing rights.

Whoa.

Whoa, so this is kind of more like civil court because we're dispensing razzing rights.

We do not take this lightningly.

Yeah.

To the members of the highest court in the land and their little rinky-toed bailiff, Jordan.

I'll rate you, toad

i bring you the case of the misplaced corpse my party had captured a hostile noble that our rogue decided to send ahead of us as a meat shield while we explored a castle okay

so predictably upon entering his first room alone with the rest of us coward behind like lily-livered bailiffs our meat shield was slain by a flying sword.

Alas.

Upon clearing the room, One PC asked to roll perception to find something to hide the evidence of our crimes.

Nat 20.

The DM ruled that we found an invisibility cloak, which we quickly used to wrap the body.

Whoa, okay.

Immediately, our greedy party realized that an invisibility cloak was a magical item unworthy of our short-lived companion.

Sure.

We wanted to reclaim it for ourselves.

The DM asked for another perception check.

Naturally, we rolled a Nat 1.

It was ruled that the invisible body was so well hidden that we could not find it, and we continued on our quest without our undeserved spirits.

And seen.

And seen.

Yeah, dude.

Yeah.

Justices, there is no defendant on the stand as we all accepted this ruling.

And I later DM'd the one shot where the slain noble stalked the party as an invisible revenant.

But

I still wonder, can you immediately misplace a dead body that you just hid in a room, cloaked in a knot?

I mean, I think you absolutely can.

That's just a really funny dunk.

I mean, like, a nat 20 to a natural one.

The dice supports it for sure.

Yeah.

I guess like if you're getting into like the technical aspects of it, like with invisibility, you can still smell things.

Like you would still smell, you know, the piss and shit from this fresh corpse.

Yeah, true.

I mean, you can definitely make that argument, but also this makes me laugh.

Oh, yeah.

No, no, no.

Here's the deal.

Yeah.

This is, man, this is an actual, this is a very tough one.

No, you're right.

If, if, if they doubled down and they said, okay, we're going to try to sniff it out, then I'd be like, okay.

But then if they're like, but then you tried to sniff it it out, you already did your perception check.

You got a one.

Well, but if you, if you put in time, you can do more than one perception check.

Yeah.

See, I guess so.

Maybe this is just the type of D and D we play where I'm like, okay,

you've done like just a perfect bit in this room.

Like the room is clear.

You've like

S-ranked this room with your bit.

You have to move on.

Yes, that's my feeling too.

It's just like...

Perfect.

Yeah, I guess it depends on what kind of room, right?

Yeah.

Because there is a world

where if you are in a giant dungeon and there's like some huge cavernous room,

you could, you know, fail enough to not remember where you put it or something like that, or think you put it somewhere, or it fell to a different area and it's like harder to find.

Or it could have fell down a trap door or something like that.

Like you are in a dungeon,

right?

So like something, a ghast could have came and stole it.

A chasm.

Something, you know, there's like monsters and stuff about.

So yeah, so it does kind of feel like the most satisfying thing though is to stick with that and then later the they trip over something and they didn't see what they tripped over and it was

although it would be really hard like the nat one again It's gonna happen five percent of the time is there a five percent chance that you would hide something in a room and then not be able to find it Probably not.

I think I'm just like on board with this call and it makes

like religiously it works nat 20 and a nat one It feels it feels too good bookends Yeah, but like I mean if you guys like had been like oh can we do a perception chapter and smell it if you guys like cast any magic can i cast fairy fire because you know there's there are things steps you could have taken to try to more actively so if you did just wholly get shut down i guess that's technically not fair right at the end of the day i don't think the dm deserves to even get razzed for this decision whether it was oh that's interesting yeah i also yeah because it's about razzing rights

it's about razzing rights and they kind of dunked on them and also it's not just the it's not just a 5% chance because it's the chance of going from a NAT 20 to a NAT 1.

Yeah.

Right?

That's interesting.

If we're talking about Razing, there's no way the DM gets Razzed for this.

The players have to get Razzed for this.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, because they got greedy.

Okay.

They got greedy.

They got something really good to hide their thing.

And then they were like, actually, we want the thing.

And then they got greedy.

And then the dice were like, you were greedy.

Yeah.

The goof was given.

The goof was rescinded.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And this is all kind of in the same like voice, right?

It's all in the same flavor of game.

It's like, you guys are being silly.

You guys are sending the noble ahead to be like a meat shield.

And then, you know, in Monty Python, holy grail, like something like this would happen.

They would like lose something because it was invisible.

Yeah.

The only button on this joke is that you do see like a naked mole man like pick up the cloak and run away with it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I what I want is like you guys do the whole dungeon and then on your way out, someone gets like a nat one to avoid a trap and then like they trip over something and then they like uh kick a little bit of the invisible cloak off of the dead body i do think yeah it's without knowing how what the room is like it's like if it's any kind of small room with not a lot of stuff in it it would be impossible to not find it eventually by just being like i know we hid it in a corner there's fucking four corners of the room we'll just go kick at where we think it might be

but if it's if it's huge and there's a bunch of stuff around and it's covered in something they destroyed stuff stuff happened with the fight they buried it under some stuff.

Like, I don't know.

People can.

Yeah.

If you're in the famed Cumberland Caverns in Tennessee, then, like, yeah, there's a lot of places to get.

Whoa, what kind of animals they got in there?

Bats.

What kind of pizza they got there?

You know,

wine fish.

The hot chicken is so wet.

I think Justice Axford.

brings up a great point in that we're not establishing any kind of like law here or like a true ruling.

This is a civil case about who should get razzed.

I think the spirit of all of this was very goofy and funny, and your DM picked the funniest thing, and I do think they have some grounds to do that.

Yeah.

I think they get the Razzing rights.

So I think the DM has the Razzing right.

So I think, I mean, like, a DM is always going to get Razzed.

Just by definition, that's going to happen.

But I feel like...

Maximum, you get Razzed for one session and then it's dropped.

I think, much like this bit, it's dropped.

The DM got you here.

The DM just got you here.

Yeah, you got Gaz.

Yeah.

You got it.

You're going to make a bell rung.

In another campaign, this might not have worked, but I think

it sounds like from the way y'all are playing, this is this is fair game.

So, unfortunately, we are gonna send Lightning McQueen through your wedding, yeah.

So, you, you, uh,

unfortunately, you're gonna get rest.

Your DM is allowed to rest.

Have been awarded

to the DM.

Wow, congratulations.

Congratulations, congratulations to the DM.

Congrats, congratulations, congrats, congratulations,

okay.

One more case.

This one comes from Siren Sing Songs.

To the honorable judges and Joseph.

Close.

I present the case of stealth turned performance.

If that sounds like a nonsensical case, it is because I believe my players have made a nonsensical choice.

Okay, I'm going to say

my gut reaction is in real life: if I got caught in the middle of a stealth, I'd try to turn it into a performance.

So I'm not a powerful.

Yeah, I'm thinking specifically of Wayne's World 2, where they're dressed as the village people and they're all around spying on the bad guys, and then they get caught on stage and they play YMCA and they have to perform.

Exactly.

There is some Wayne's World precedent.

Yeah,

keep in mind the Wayne's World 2 precedent, but go on.

Continue.

Okay.

I was DMing a campaign for my three players, a bard, a warlock, and an artificer.

The party was attempting to sneak into a prison for a prison break.

And upon failing their group stealth check, I narrated that a few guards turned their heads and began heading their way.

After hearing this, the bard of the party asked if she could roll a performance check instead of stealth and begin an impromptu dance routine with her background as a performer.

The other party members asked to help.

I asked, are you sure?

To which they all said yes and rolled performance.

I mean, go to God.

Yeah.

Judges, they rolled a 23 group performance check, and I narrated that on such a high roll, multiple guards recognized them and apprehended them.

All was well, and it wound up being a good way to get them into the prison for the prison break operation they were trying to complete.

But my party still razzes me.

Oh, it's another case about razzing.

But my party still razzes me to this day.

I razz them in return for choosing to draw attention to themselves when they were trying to be sneaky.

But they claim it was such a high role, they should have, quote, blended in with street traffic and avoided the guards altogether.

This sort of takes me to an old ruling where it's like, yeah, if you jump off a cliff and doing a 25 athletics check or something like that, that just means you do two sweet flips before you splatter on the ground.

You know what I mean?

Like you succeeding on that check to not be noticed, you would have to do a dance routine.

Had you said, okay, we've been noticed.

I want to do a deception check to blend in with the crowd or something like that.

I think you have more of an argument there.

Yeah, if I'm the DM, I'm like, I'm open to that

pivot from stealth to performance.

However, this one doesn't have justification behind it.

If I'm kind of like, you got to give me a reason why the guards aren't going to be like, why are you here to begin with why are you doing this show here we're going to perform at the prison and in which case i'm more open-minded right and then in which case it's deception too yeah yeah

the role is deception for sure you know i think in a perfect world they roll really high in performance it sounds like the situation is They were in like a town square or something, but also trying to get into like a prison nearby or something like that.

Because they said they would blend in with the other townsfolk was like their word.

With street traffic, yeah.

Yeah.

So blend in with street traffic.

So there is a world where you could have been like, Okay, you're doing this great performance.

You've started to gather a crowd, do a deception check to show that you're not just doing this like super near the prison and you're already wanted criminals.

You know what I mean?

I think you guys are right, though, because like now that I know that it's like they're blending in within street traffic, then they might be street performers.

So that makes more sense.

However, I do think that there is an element of deception.

Yes.

Definitely.

It's almost maybe a two-roll situation.

Like one One roll to gather the crowd, one roll to get away.

Yeah.

You know what I'm going to say here?

I'm going to say

no one deserves to be razzed here.

Whoa.

I'm going to say that.

This was everyone learning together.

This is everyone learning together.

Razzing rights rescinded.

Razzing rights revoked.

You all need to be really fucking serious about this.

Because I'll say...

Getting caught and then being like, I'm going to roll a deception or a performance check to me actually totally tracks.

I know the submitter was like, thought that that was nuts.

Especially on the side.

I'm not sure if you're in the flow of foot traffic.

Yeah.

Of course, you're going to just be like, what, me?

Oh, I was just poking my head around, you know?

Like, of course, you're going to lie in that situation or whatever.

That's like totally normal.

Yeah, if you're doing like a Showtime dance, you like grab onto the bars and then flip off of them, but then you also peek through the bars.

So I think this wasn't an absurd, it's a little bit absurd to be like, I'm trying to hide, so I'm going to dance.

I think the players could have done a better job of being like, I'm trying to make it seem like I belong here, or I'm trying to draw draw a crowd to create some distance between me and the guards.

Cause maybe you could have even narrated that.

Like, you do see people start gathering around you.

The guards obviously notice you, but you see, it's taking a little bit of time for them to get to you, roll another stealth check as you disappear amongst the crowd.

You know what I mean?

There's like kind of a way you could have played ball with them a little bit.

That being said, that would have been you really going above and beyond.

They didn't give you a ton to work with here.

They just said they started dancing after they got caught.

So you're also within your right to just be like, cool, you dance as you get taken to jail.

So I think, you know, I think you had a pretty down-the-middle reaction to that.

And I think that they panicked and had a panic roll.

So

I think no one should get Razzl.

I think this is pretty down the middle.

Yeah.

No Razzles.

Wow.

Your main Razlus.

We're on your side, but you're not allowed to make fun of your players.

Okay.

Yeah, dude.

Okay.

Now, with that, shall we step into church for this week's confession?

Please

drive Lightning McQueen down the aisle.

Seven to the church where there is a marriage that

Lightning McQueen is crashing.

Okay, this one comes from Bex.

To the most holy and exalted clergy of our Lord Dice Christ, I come before you with not a confession, but to ask for your blessing.

What?

I started playing D ⁇ D with my siblings many years ago.

And now we are all adults with jobs and busy lives.

So we rarely play all together.

I find that after listening to NADPO and other shows, I'm inspired and really miss playing.

So, I am looking into joining an online game.

This, Your Honors, is where I ask for your blessing.

I have never played with anyone but my siblings, and I am really nervous to roleplay and just overall play differently than how I'm used to.

I ask, O Holy Ones, to bless me in the name of Dice Christ so that I may have courage and maybe a crit on finding a new group to adventure with.

What about if this person plays plays as Lightning McQueen?

Whoa, perfect.

That is icebreaker.

Yeah, it's got to work once, right?

If it didn't work the last time, we'll do.

We're doing for it to work.

You need to double down on it, though.

We give you our blessings.

This is very sweet.

I think, you know, if you're inspired by stuff like NADPO and like other actual plays and stuff, I would honestly look within those communities and see if there are other people who want to play that listen to actual plays and stuff.

And you might be more likely to run into people that, I don't know, want to play a game more like you.

With this vibe.

I also think that there's like kind of, I feel like, I just feel like there's not a wrong way to role play if you're having fun.

Yeah.

I don't, I really think if you're, if, like, that sounds very trite, but I really think that if you're having a good time, then you can't really misstep.

God, put that quote on a bench.

The only way you can misstep is if you're like biting someone's shoulder who's the one who's

like, or if you're like a sorcerer, if you're a wild magic sorcerer and you're doing it a little too

much, you have to be having fun with the table, not just one other person at the table.

So I think if your heart is open to it, you don't have to be like, you don't have to be like, oh, my good actor.

You don't have to be like, is my character good?

None of those questions.

Find it on its feet.

Yeah.

And also like being like a,

if you're more of like a crunchy player or something like that, you can find tables like that.

Yeah.

So

I think just try to find, and also be willing to don't feel like you need to stick with the first table that you meet, especially when you're like playing online.

Like feel free.

If

it's not the vibe, bounce on out of there and you'll find a new table.

You know what the best part about this is?

What's that?

After you play, you can text your siblings and talk to them all about it and then give you advice on how to play your character.

Oh, yeah.

Or maybe they'll want to play.

Maybe it'll reignite it.

It's true.

I would honestly float it and be like, maybe we get a Zoom game going once a month or something like that.

Yeah, that might be fun.

Maybe next time we're all at the beach house.

Yeah.

Hell yeah.

That sounds really fun.

Yeah.

So, I mean, at the very least, start doing it just to make your siblings jealous.

Yeah.

Don't reignite that game.

That's your real purpose here.

So go with the blessing.

Yeah, go with our blessings.

When they hear about your lightning queen rogue, they're gonna be like, oh, yeah, so jealous.

And with that, we're gonna go ahead and wrap this one up.

Thank you.

Thank you all so much for listening.

We have more insanity over on our Patreon, patreon.com slash nadpod.

That's any DDPOD, don't sing yet.

This week we're doing, we've been mixing it up.

Every other DD court, instead of doing more DD court, we do just kind of a random mixed bag type thing for the short rest tier.

This week, we watched cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue, which is a 1990 cartoon special sponsored by the government for like the just say no to drugs

campaign.

I won't say anything else.

Yeah, and we won't, we're not going to tell you.

Let's just say there's a lot of cartoon freaking heavy hitters.

It's star-studded.

It's so freaking star-studded.

Packed cast.

It's very funny, very fun to watch.

I have a very funny episode that we've actually already recorded.

So we won't spoil it for you.

We can confidently say it's awesome.

Yeah, we can confidently say that it rocks.

We've got some stuff to plug.

We've got Dimension 20 live show coming up.

See Starstruck in Las Vegas on November 1st at MGM.

You can get tickets.

Just search Dimension 20 Live.

And I'll shout out Jeff S for the Magic the Gathering cards.

The Secret Layer drop cards were so cool.

And I'll have to check out Final Fantasy 16.

I saw that there's a Play-Doh Secret Layer set coming out soon, which seems very good.

I think they like sculpted all of the art out of Play-Doh.

Secret Layer is so cool.

I'll plug, you know, this is crazy.

I'll plug Animonoguchi.

They're a band.

Yeah, it's hella at a time.

They have a new album that came out, and it's a little more, it's less chiptune and more pop-punk.

And it really just hit the spot for me.

And they're touring now.

So if you go, if they're coming to you, go see them live because they rock.

Awesome.

Right on.

And I'll plug my sub stack.

It's substack.com at J Kurtwitz.

Sweet.

And you can follow us on social media there, Riemann at use, at Seat First Me, at Caldis Caldwell, at Extras Emily, and at JKurtz Jake.

And you can talk about the show online using hashtag NADPOT.

That's NADDPOD.

We are, we are.

Youth of a nation.

We are, we are.

Youth of a nation.

Dungeon, dungeon.

Dungeon, dungeon, dungeon, gin.

Dungeon, dungeon,

Well, well, well, it's time to thank our benevolent council of elders, and they are Brad D, Jeffrey S., Lord of the Fjord, later McSkater, Matt M, Cutter W, Jeff C, Daniel G.

Danielle, the dastardly dame, Carpe Liam, Victor T.

Baldor's Boy, Boyd's Friend, Justin I, Danny, Danster, TJM, Trey Lee, The Cray, Christopher B, Damiel, Say My Whole Name, Rohi, You Got It Jordan L, Cyborg Version of Josh the Cobalt, Targat, Stevie Waggs, Hellish Rebuker, The NBDM, PHD, Princess Yar, Jory S, Jack L, Nicholas C, Star of Every Film Ever Made in Bohumia, Mike H.

Alka Smeltzer Plus, Great Value Gemma, Tyler F, Carborough, Chapel Hill, FPV, Cece Lulu, Bald Byrne, Heracule Poirot, The Rabbit Folk Detective, Timmy R, Jake's Jerk Jelly, Hashtag CCC, Cass, Skateboard, Cass, Stephen, Sans, Scintillating Songs, C.

Nick W.

Nico, the underpaid English teacher, aren't they all?

William W.

Big Bad Beardo the Mad, Eric McD, Anorama, Percival, Frederickstein, von Mussel, Klowowski, D.

Rolo, the third, Jay Dragonborn, Guardian of the Vibe, honoring the cock, impressive, Dongle, Ben A.

Dave H., Dustin S.

Not That Nick, Danny F, Hawkeye, Pierce, Bookfar's Assistant, Izzy F, Big Bad John, DPC, he's awesome, Sean, the shape-free mechanic of Zelbildar, Summer RG, Mark, the Dark Lord's Taint, Kat C, Misa of House and Zunza, Ariel, the occasional mermaid, Selena N, aka the lazy raptor, B Perky Always, Bonky, Fiasco, Pat L, Lauren H, Serve 16, Annie the Baywild Therapist, Pierogi, Frenzy, Salil, BioCourt, 7, Amber, Dexterous, Bean Rat Was Innocent, Trub, Hop Dropper, Jack H, King of the Mole People under Iron Deep, dressed in blue and fighting his way through a bracket-style tournament, Balin, Paj, the bitchin' bony bard, Druidic Peyton, Carlin C, Omri M, Noah, the bullywug boy, hashtag honor the cock, James G, everything bago, the Ladron who just wants to hang out with his pet badger, Stripey, Han, Eric B, Marcos, PhD, Eventually, Learns the Balance, Druid, Frida M, Maggie, Holly, the green laughing hyena, Grim Waller, executive chef of Bohumia, Aaron B.

Russell H, a monk named Dilgo, yes, the whole thing, yes, every time.

Cody C, Lorelei, the succubi, and Kira, the succulent snack, Cow Go Truckin', your friendly neighborhood, Yant and Yunkle, Andrew and Sid, soon-to-be education specialist, John Adams, James F, Wayfarer now has to do something with the trolls, get rid of them, turn to page 42, keep them, turn to page 69, Oreo, Barpo, Good Barrel Bard, Barian.

Garrett G, one big curd.

Charlie Brown's best friend.

Renee, the monster captain.

Olivia, the enchanting bard, and Jared, the soap opera cleric are now preparing to debut their song, Jesse's Grill, at Spudfuckers.

Blue Ash, Fico, Garrett, the Artificer, Anthony, the rattest of dudes.

Jay, K guard, Fancy Matt.

The fairies have returned to debauchery and now must go to the carnal corner.

Cantrip, Dumbledore, the Bear Onesie wearing barbarian.

Lexi H, MJ, the BFG, Roger L., Nodrog, the Pass-A-Fist, Barbarian, John Luca, Leon K, Legendary Hero of Bohumia from a Future Campaign, Shenanigans, O'Connor, Meos the Great, Joshua S.

Alexander, Lynz W, Sky the Wise, aka the Lone Dungeon Master, the Spud Fucker himself, Johnny Dude K, the Mischief of NatPods, Familiars, Pabu Eskinor, the Goliath Paladin, providing service with a smile, Kit and their cat, Jake Well Murphaly, Tim M, Dragon Knight 86, Tiles Lamar, TR, MLG, Cheeto, Shell B, Kenna's first favorite sprite girl.

Going into the zone is Barry 6 for Riva Mas Vegas.

Let's do some kubla cane and get nasty.

All right.

Jet S, Snailis who's infecting Worcestershire for within.

Death to tyrants, Mimas Guides, Megan N., Genevieve of the Sea, Anthony B, Balnor's best friend, Steve, Stephanie of House in Zunza, Benjamin Benjamin A., Gimli the Corgi, Pawpaw and Foster's canine friend, Nicol A.

SSS tier quick water enjoyer, Josh H., pilot of the Nightmareverse flight, the two crew, Blue Through, Kelsey A., Ethan the Mailman, Maple the Shy Bookworm, Nick A.

J., Ashosaurus, Seth the Stroker, Bearer of All Hog-related Burdens, Billy Batson, Tori the tungsten, Dragoose, Accidental sharer of recipes, Michael L.

S.

II, Carl B., Plumber of the Realm, Ace Dregs, High Lord of Critzburg, Vin Diagram, Catamilius, the Consumed, Clinton P, Cam, the Vampire, Frogman, Dean, Jake W., High Mom, Tuesday Cross, only here for the surf and murph, natpod fan and bar mitzvah man, it's Dave O.

Steve L., Tyler McM, Alex G, Zibby DeBacheri, Kaylee, Katarina C, Misty the Crispy, Giddy, really hates flame skulls, Greg W.

There's so many of us now, but hey, you're doing great, and we love you.

Baruch Thunderhelm, fifth generation Minotaur, working as an abandoned labyrinth tour guide.

Chupak Aubrey, Bony is dead, The Waterworth, your four-legged Greg companion.

Nick, Amy, Aegis K, Ignition Class, Pedalstorm, not a DJ, but will still take the gig, DJ Dramamine.

Ulrek von Zarevich, my favorite patron, makes me say penis on my show.

Show chef Julie B., Jens Rules Kinda, Caitlin H, Buttwax, Pramilla Pivble Pabble, featuring Plumbo, Thomas C., and of course, dark lotus creations.

Thank you, everybody.

That was a hit gum podcast.