Ep 287: Santiago Lastra

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Welcome to the Off-Menu podcast, taking the egg of conversation, wrapping it in the sausage meat of friendship, rolling it in the breadcrumbs of humor and baking it in the oven of the internet or frying it in actually in the oil of the internet, Scotch egg.

That's Scotch Ed Gamble.

My name is James Egg Caster.

James James.

And together we own a dream restaurant.

James Egg Caster.

Egg.

James Egg Caster.

And every single week we invite in a guest and we ask them their favourite ever starter make or dessert side dish and drink, not in that order.

And this week, our guest is Santiago Lustra.

Santiago Lustra is an amazing chef, James.

Yes.

One of our favorite chefs, it would be fair to say.

We've been talking about him on the podcast for a long time.

We have.

Since the early days.

I'm sure we'll talk to him about the meals that we've had that

he's made us, both in his restaurant and once in his home.

Yes.

He has Cole, which is one of the best restaurants in London.

Fine dining tasting menu Mexican restaurants in London.

But he has now opened Fonda, which is a more casual affair.

And we are very excited to try it.

Yeah.

And we're very excited to speak to Santiago about his dream menu.

We love having chefs on.

We love having chefs on.

You always get a little, you know, it's interesting to hear what the, you know, it's like, who cuts the barber's hair?

Yeah, that's a good idea for a podcast.

Write that down, Benito.

Good idea for a new edition.

Get barbers on and ask them who cuts their hair.

Who cuts their hair?

Well, Benito.

Other barber's barber.

I don't know.

That's true.

Yeah, so there's a good idea for the podcast.

We get a barber in.

We say who cuts your hair.

We get that barber in.

Yes.

Eventually, we're going to find a barber who who cuts his own hair.

Because who watches the watchman?

Listen, I know that we're messing around, but I'd do that.

If you want to make the barber podcast,

and it can be a limited series, I don't, you know, we'll see how long.

Yeah.

Because I say we record all of them before we release any of them.

Yes.

So we keep going until we get to the barber who cuts their own hair.

Yeah.

And then we release all of them as a series.

Yeah.

And it's one thing.

And it's who cuts the barber's hair.

Yeah.

And it's.

It's a quick podcast.

So for you, Benito, benito in the edit yeah there's not a lot that you'll have to cut oh brilliant he's agreed to it santiago lastra is a wonderful chef but if he says a secret ingredient an ingredient which we deem to be unacceptable we will kick him out of the dream restaurant we will and this week the secret ingredient is dairy leaf dairy leaf cheese cheese slices other danny dyer danny dyer yes if you listen to the danny dyer episode you'll know that he talked about eating a whole pack of dairy league cheese slices sat on his sofa with a fan blowing the little wrappers everywhere and look i'd do do it yep but it's a good secret ingredient yeah this is something that we can do now is we can just pluck secret ingredients from other guests episodes and do that as well so you know because look is it the format point we regret the most in the podcast sure

but actually Ed probably regrets more the fact he has to come up with a little intro every single episode and yeah come up with a different meal and well I've definitely repeated some haven't I I must have done lasagna about eight times now and if you can find all those episodes

tweet Benito and he will send you a side chopping board

hopefully Santiago will not say Dairy Lee cheese I'd be surprised but sometimes chefs come in and they're like yeah I don't have time to cook properly at home I don't have time to do the fancy stuff so when I get back I'm just going to have a pack of Dairy Lee cheese slices this is true shift and that's my dream yeah so it might come up it might come up if he says cheese slices we'll push him for the brand yes if it's dairy lee he's out i'd be look he's been in the uk for a while now but you he is a Mexican chef.

He was brought up in Mexico.

I'd be surprised if Dairy Lee has reached its long udders over to Mexico.

This is the thing about this podcast is that we can find out.

Yeah.

We can find out how culture spreads around the world and how different cultures embrace other.

Good title for different cultures.

Good title for another podcast.

Do they have Dairy Lee in Mexico?

A great question.

A great question.

That's like no such thing as a fish.

It's going to be top of the charts.

Do they have Dairy Lee in Mexico?

Yeah.

yeah and second will be who got the barber's hair yeah i guess old off menu will be in third place

this is the off menu menu of santiago lastra

welcome santiago to the dream restaurant thank you so much it's a big

welcome santiago lastra to the dream restaurant but expecting you for some time thank you thank you it's a big honor to be here that's what we like to hear.

That's not enough people tell us it's an honor.

No, not at all.

That might be a first, actually, for the podcast.

We'll have to go back and listen to all of them.

But

Leto just dropped his pen on the floor.

Leto, we've just been told it's an honor to be on the podcast and you've dropped you're dropping your pen.

You got too excited.

Yeah.

Get too excited.

I'm so excited to hear that it's an honor to be here.

Let's doubt now for this pad.

Why don't we double check at the end whether you still think

listening at the end?

It's an honor for us to have you on the podcast.

We've spoke about you numerous times on the podcast, about how much we love your food.

The skatewing tacos have been shouted out more than once.

And the lovely meal that we had at your house, which was like, you just moved to London at that point?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was in London for about a year and a half or something like that until we found this place when we were doing some research.

to find out what will be the food of a restaurant and invite a few people when we believe that we're ready.

When we're ready yeah and i remember you guys were uh one of the first ones to try the crazy experiments and uh yeah so then that's why i think that it's an honor because it's just like it's one of those things that you don't really know when you have like a vision of something that doesn't exist and and you kind of like you don't know how to do it you know you don't know how to really make that happen but we are you're thriving to create it and the people that you meet along the way that support you at the beginning and at the end all the time, it's just like, it just really feels great how it comes back into being here, you know?

Yes.

Which is great.

I mean, it happened, from my perspective, happened quite quickly from going from the house and then you did a pop-up and then Cole opened.

And now you've got a new place opening called Fonda.

It's not been that long that this is all.

No, it's about like five years.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's a lot to happen in five years.

Yeah, yeah, I think so.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's been quick, you know?

Like, we also have like, you know, like COVID in the the middle.

So it's been, yeah, it's just so crazy.

But yeah, it's good.

Yeah, most restaurants in five years open and close forever.

So like to open and then open another one and do all that, you know, when there's a pandemic kicking off as well is pretty nuts.

Yeah.

Is there a secret?

Because they're going to be ever chefs listening to this wanting some tips of how to keep their restaurants thriving in the modern day.

And this guy has opened two restaurants in five years in London during COVID.

Yeah, I think the secret is to be able to have an open mind in a way.

And I have the support of my business partners as well.

And we all believe that you have to kind of be flexible and adapt, you know.

I think like something that COVID like really, really teach us all is that you have to adapt.

And that is what we did from day one.

It's just like, okay, well, how can we do this better?

How can we do this in the less complicated way, but we're still trying to

be successful?

And London is such a competitive city.

And you have to adapt to the market as well, just to adapt to the guests, adapt to whatever is happening, the produce,

the media, everything.

And I think we are part of a generation that it needs to have that.

It's not about, okay, well, things used to be that way and like people have like a specific way of doing things and it's going to work forever.

It's more like, okay, well, well, it worked yesterday, it might not work tomorrow.

So it's about adapting and having this mentality of

change and evolving, you know,

work.

I think you did fill a massive gap in the market though, as well, certainly within the UK.

Like, sure, Mexican cuisine exists in the UK, but not particularly.

You know, there's not like, I think there's an idea of what Mexican food is in the UK, and it's not necessarily what Mexican food actually is.

Is that fair?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, like, it's, it's, it's one of those things that there was a few concepts that the Americans came out with and they kind of take over the world with them.

And one of them, I guess, was...

I don't know, chicken wings.

And then you have burgers.

And then you have, you know, like this kind of fast food from pizza to different things to burritos, you know.

And, you know, even the pizza is like, originally from Italy, you get, you get, you know, like dominoes and pizza hot and all these things.

And then at the end of the day Mexican food like Tex-Mex food was one of those hundreds of concepts that they came up with and it's food from Texas like Texas used to be Mexico a long time ago but then they come out with their own cuisine and there is amazing text-mex food yeah in Texas

amazing Californian food in California but it's a is a cuisine of its own and i believe what the missed message is that um that's not really Mexican food

and that is Mexican food is made from scratch you know you can't get cans and just put them all in a burrito and wrap it I mean you can make an amazing burrito but it needs everything to be made by hand on the day and that's something that I guess is lacking around the world and and there's a few people that are starting to do it properly and it's just a cuisine on its own and it's a story to be told you know in a way and we want to be part of that kind of movement so coal the the original restaurant is like more of a fine dining experience right but then this new this new restaurant fonda is that more of a sort of casual a casual space yes yeah yeah yeah so then uh the idea is that we still uh work with a really high quality really high quality ingredients the main the same suppliers that we work with uh coal we use them in fonda uh but it's not a tasty menu restaurant uh with where coal is a is a fine dining experience so now we're doing around 17 courses.

So then you sit down at either you for lunch or dinner, you will have 17 dishes that every dish will tell a story.

And we're using 100% ingredients from the UK.

Well, almost just the chili and the corn we bring from Mexico, but everything else is from Britain.

And where in Fonda, it's more of an a la carte menu and it's inspired in regional Mexican cooking, but you will have dishes like a quesadilla or like a

gringa or

like fish tacos and stuff like that that are made like are dishes that already exist, but they are the take our take on those dishes.

Sprinkle some amazing ingredients from and seasonal ingredients from Britain, but also we will use like olive oil and stuff like that.

I mean, like in a way, like fonda is the food that I will make in my house here in London, you know, basically.

We always start with still a sparkling water, Santiago.

Do you have a preference?

Amazing.

Yeah, so I actually was thinking about it.

I used to be a really sparkling water person when I go to restaurants.

But then I think now I'm getting old now.

So I'm going to be a little bit more of a, yeah.

You don't look old at all, Santiago.

You look very old.

I'm going to do a combination.

So that's what I do normally now.

Oh, do you?

Yeah, so there is

an interesting thing.

Always pushing the embedding.

There is a very interesting thing about sparkling water that the gas that is in the water has

it gives you the feeling of some sort of acidity.

So the fact that the sparkling water is slightly more sour will give you a little bit more pleasure, let's say, you know?

Okay.

Plus the bubbles, obviously.

So what I will do is to have still water

with a little bit of sparkling water, like half a half, and a dash of sea bottom juice that is this sour berry juice from England that I really like.

You'll be surprised to hear that's the first time that's come up.

What did you say?

What is it?

It's called Seabookthorn juice.

That this is berry.

Yeah, it's a berry that is the color of your shirt, actually.

Orange for the listener.

Sea buckthorn.

As soon as he walked in, I thought, he's wearing a sea buckthorn t-shirt.

Seabuckthorn boy coming in.

Yeah, exactly.

And it's the equivalent of having a thousand orange juices.

So it has a lot of vitamin C.

It's insane.

And And it's really good.

It grows here all over the coast in the UK.

Very good.

So you've got a drop of that.

Yeah.

And still water in first.

And then the

people wanting to make this at home.

Yeah.

Is it still water in first and then you're putting in the spot?

Yeah, exactly.

And then instead of the sea buckthorn juice, you can put a little bit of like a squeeze of lime juice or like a salt.

2,000 oranges.

Yeah.

Yes, exactly.

That's what I juice a thousand oranges, put one drop of it in, one drop it.

Yeah.

You're done.

Sea buckthorn, I'd say, is one of those ingredients that I've seen on like fancy menus.

Yeah.

It's not really made the transfer into the mainstream.

Exactly.

Not as like there's some shops in Somerset that they sell Seabuckthorn jam or like Seabuckthorn.

So yeah, so it's definitely gonna get...

its moment in some point i believe but uh probably this will help sea buckthorn to become a thing i mean like at the end of the day it's um it's really healthy and it's really delicious but it's really sour But at the same time, I mean, who has lime juice on its own?

Lime juice is very sour.

No one will have lime juice on its own, but they just squeeze a little bit.

So that's why a dash.

The fact that you know that some shops in Somerset sell it.

I think everyone, like normal, like if someone comes to visit them at their house and is like, where can I get, you know, whatever food it is, whatever drink it is, they might know where locally it is.

Because you're a chef.

Yeah.

If someone says to you, where can I get that?

You know where in the whole country because it's your job to know where to get stuff and where to get the best version of it and the best so what so when we brought it up you're like yeah there's some shops in summers yeah exactly in summerset which is nowhere near where i live

that sell this stuff and i know where to get cbuk for jam and juice and everything yeah exactly i mean at the end of the day yeah it's the job the job is to know because you have to do a lot of these recommendations all the time.

So it's like, oh, where can I get this?

You're like, but at the same time, you can always get it online.

So you can buy Seabooktorn just online and get it delivered.

Like you can get it from Amazon or something.

On the dark web.

Yeah, on the dark web.

No, the orange web.

That's lovely stuff.

I much prefer you saying there's some shops in Somerset rather than just going online.

Yeah, I mean, like,

Amazon.

It's one of those things.

But then, then you can just make it a whole trip.

You know, just ask ChatGBT, like, where can I get sea buckthorn in a shop in somerset yeah and plan my trip and then you just all based around the yeah exactly yeah i'll tell you what's just if chat gpt knows where to get sea buckthorn we are in trouble

it is advancing too fast ai is taking over it's taking over your job quickly man if it knows where to get the best sea buck fawn it is it is already overtaking most human beings we are

i'm sure i'm sure he does yeah he does know yeah so that's crazy

man yeah but we use it i use it i use it quite a lot actually well not a lot, but like I use it.

I used to like ask things about my job, you know, like cooking and stuff.

Like if you want a recipe,

before you used to like, like watch like 50 YouTube videos that you don't know which one is the good one, you know, where now you can just ask, whatever, I'm going to make a custard sauce, but I only have cream and eggs.

How can I do it?

And then it will tell you.

a recipe and then you can say oh well i i want a recipe that is lighter or i want to put mescal on it you know and it will tell you you.

And then you can.

Does it work though?

It works.

And then you can adjust it.

And then you can ask as well.

I mean, I have an Aaron Dishef as well.

So don't worry, Dan.

You're not going to lose your job.

It's good to have the tool of asking things that you normally will Google, basically.

And

it helps, you know, like also if

you think that something is impossible or possible, you can ask as well.

Is that possible?

And it's like, oh, well, that's not possible.

Maybe next time.

GPT is like your Remy the Rat.

You can put it under your chef's hat, put your hat on top of it, and then as you're working, just be like, How do I make the best custom?

And then it moves your hands for you.

I mean, not there yet.

Not there yet.

Not there yet.

One day.

No, just like a references.

References.

Also, for us, it's quite difficult for the team to research about, well, things in Spanish, you know, because a lot of information of Mexican cooking mexican food is available in spanish like not a lot in english so then like that you can ask something and it will it will just search in every language so it doesn't search only in english where that is something that you will normally struggle or if you want to buy a spoon you know like i want to buy spoon so you know like you're gonna buy like a beautiful spoon yeah yeah then if you if you type it's really interesting because if you type i mean it's gonna be very boring But anyways, the thing is that if you feel the big judge of the

old pen dropping boy will edit this out people, they can always take this up.

But anyways, the thing is that if you want to buy like a beautiful small spoon, it's more difficult in English.

You have to search like in Japanese or in like, or in Dutch.

Like Dutch are really good at cutlery.

So if you if you search for cutlery in Dutch, you will have more options or in French.

you'll have a different options in english you will have like a bigger cutlery

I've had this explained my whole life.

This, I had no idea that if you want a nice spoon, you can't search in English.

It explains everything, all our spoons are shit.

That just be with all due respect

your cutlery joy is a travesty.

It is, it makes me ashamed to know you.

No offense to English spoons.

You know, I love English spoons.

Pop dumps or bread, pop loves or bread, Santiago.

Last trip, pop nubs or bread.

I always say bread.

Yeah, in Mexico, obviously, we have tortillas.

So they are a bread made with corn.

Yeah, so that's something that I love.

But something that you could probably get a little bit more of like a dish.

I like, it's going to sound really niche.

I don't want to be too niche in this conversation.

No, no, no.

Niche away, please.

Yeah, so there is this Georgian bread that is called hachipure.

It's amazing.

So

it looks like a boat.

that is a bread a bake in a shape of a boat and in the corners you have a stuffed crust crust of this uh like amazing fresh cheese that is like a mozzarella but a little bit more like stringy and acid with more acidity and then in the middle of this boat you have a egg jolt more cheese and clarified butter and then what you do is to take the crust without like breaking the boat and then kind of dip it into the egg jolt and uh if this is my last meal I was thinking to pimp that up with sea urchins.

Wow.

Yeah.

So that's that's what I was thinking.

I never try it, but I think, I mean, if you just can't just drink whatever you want.

I've been in Georgia a few times.

I used to live in different places in Eastern Europe and making research.

And that was one of the things that you're really like, oh my God.

Like, if you haven't had a hachipuri, I recommend you because it's like life-changing.

I've had it a couple of times.

Yeah.

There's some good Georgian restaurants in London, actually, like in North London.

And it is just.

Because, you know, you look at it and you go, why have I been eating just plain bread?

Yeah, exactly.

Get an egg in it.

Pop some cheese in it for god's sake yeah and butter yeah and butter and sea urchins and sea urchins that's your addition yeah

that's you tipping them up see what i love about this already santiago is quite often when we have like you know proper high-end chefs on or food critics you know people of your standing they'll often go like i just want simple just something simple you know

but i like that you've come in here and you've gone I'm putting sea urchins on.

I like that you're not a liar.

All those other people are liars.

I'm like, oh, if you love them so much, why aren't you making that all the time?

Yeah, no, but that's the problem.

That's the thing that I was thinking because I eat quite a lot of Japanese food all the time.

And I was thinking, like, well, should I just have sushi or like, I don't know, like a misu soup or like tacos or something?

But then fried chicken.

You can you can have that all the time.

So if it's your last meal, well, this isn't your last one.

This is your dream meal.

All right,

this was my last meal.

It's the same thing.

If your dream, if your dream meal is your last meal, then that's fine.

Yeah.

If you want to die, then it is.

we can make it happen.

Like, can't we do that?

Yeah, sure.

How do you want to die?

Yeah.

Okay, that's fine.

How do you want to die?

Eating.

No.

No, it's fine.

Okay, well, we don't die then.

It's fine.

Well, I feel better now.

Alright, maybe.

Yeah, okay.

I still think it's a good way to approach it of going like, yeah, just really good.

Your dream meal, I think, needs to be some sort of your last meal because otherwise it's just so hard to think what's the dream meal.

Yeah.

so then if you're like, okay, well, that's the ultimate, yeah, the ultimate meal, because then you're never, you'll never top it afterwards, yeah, exactly, exactly.

That's it, yeah.

And uh, yeah, what's the point of living after you've had this meal?

Yeah, exactly.

There isn't one, yeah,

what um

is it similar this this bread to i i had something when i was in i think washington dc uh that was like this but it was called like pied or something p-i-e-d it was it was

yeah the turkey pita maybe no what pita bread no not pear bread no p-i-t-e is pita bread but it is turkish at p-a-b-e but it had the similar thing in it it was like but it's like more like flat maybe maybe similar no it was like a boat man i like a boat no i'm gonna search like a boat i'm gonna search food in my photos in the middle was it like canoe shapes yes so maybe that's the one yes i think it was like a canoe um

Hold on a sec.

Fast food, food.

Wow, if you search food in my photos, it comes up with a load of stuff that is there you go that's what i had yeah that's peach yeah that that's similar but then you will have like an egg jolk in the middle right and then instead of having the cheese like so much cheese yeah it's less cheese so you don't really see it and the egg jolk is floating in clarified butter but it's similar it's similar i guess there's good you know i think it's just there's different types but that's what's exciting about world cuisine sometimes is that there's countries that are near each other or that you can see how things have been taken to other countries and changed and there's like yeah so that must be yeah it's a curvy yeah yeah but that's maybe they took it over

cheese and butter down there well oh looks

talk us through the addition of the sea urchin as well that's your idea right yeah

why do you want to add the sea urchin i was just think i just love surchin yeah and uh it's one of those things that like i think the sea urchin had this like uh egg jolt kind of texture uh that it melts in your mouth but it also had this intense sea flavor.

And there's this, like sometimes when you think about food, you have references as you have reference.

So sometimes you have these, I don't know, these like flat breads with anchovies, you know, that's really like traditional around here.

So then you have

this bread with an intense fish flavor.

So what I was thinking is to, why not to add more creaminess to the creaminess?

and

this like incredible like sea flavor to make it more luxurious, you know, even, you know.

But you know what's going to happen now is the people who listen to this, that sounds delicious.

They're going to go to your restaurants and be like, where's that amazing

Georgian sea urchin bread that we heard about?

Is it on the menu?

You're right.

It's not in the menu, no.

But I mean, maybe upon request.

I could do it at home.

Probably.

Well, you need to sort some sewer.

You do a special night at Fonda.

Yeah.

Where you cook this entire dream menu.

Yeah.

Oh, that would be sick for a small, that will be sick a small selective dining audience yeah that will be only people who can keep hold of their pens are allowed

like when like when we so just for the listener we have mentioned this before so you you were renting a house in was it in ealing uh east acton east acton and you were doing like research and development for all the dishes for coal yeah and what you did was is you ripped out the whole kitchen and put a professional kitchen in it yeah And you didn't tell the landlord.

Yes.

Just like when I ripped out my living room and put a comedy club in there.

Yeah.

So I didn't have a kitchen.

I moved here and I had like a couple of years.

Well, like one year and a half of

like just putting the concept together and traveling around the UK just to find, just understand a little bit more of the ingredients, the nature,

meeting people and then going to restaurants, etc.

And then after that,

I met my business partners and they were like, okay, well, we need to try the food.

And I was like, well, I don't have the food yet.

The food is going to happen, but I need to do some research.

While we were finding this location, because here in London, it takes forever to get a site.

I was like, okay, well, I need to move somewhere where I can have like this kitchen.

And that's what we did.

So then I moved, I moved, my brother and I, we moved to that place.

And then downstairs, yeah, we transformed this this like kitchen living room and dining room into one kitchen yeah so we put like some professional fridges there and some tabletops and the kitchen of the house became the pot wash area so that was only for making like washing the dishes and then in the backyard we put the we set a tent with like a wooden floor and and there was the the dining room so it was like a whole thing at the end of the day it was our you know just like a pimped it's like the same as the hachipura you know you put searching on it yes it's like it's cooking at home, but with some professional kit.

Yeah.

Because at the end of the day, you need to get immersed.

When you are creating something, you need to be there.

So I remember I had this chalkboard downstairs, just waking up and just writing ideas and maybe blending something at three in the morning.

So it was like, it was like this immersion process because at the beginning, nothing really tastes good.

You know, it took, we were doing like 14, 16 dishes a week.

Wow.

And it's just, it was just not good until, I mean, I guess it happens similar with the jokes, no, like sometimes, yep, no, like they probably are not good at the beginning, but then you have to like train yourself to be able to, you know, like uh pull out a joke, let's say, you know, and uh, and that is kind of what happened in that place, yeah, just this training, and then after that, we just started doing these dinners.

And uh, and I remember my peer company was like, What, like, you're gonna bring like a bunch of like high-profile people and journalists to

stack me to these kind of jokes

and two idiots who literally couldn't believe their luck.

And

they will, and but like, thankfully, everyone said yes, and everyone was really like, it was really unusual, you know, because it wasn't like, okay, well, we're gonna go to this pre-opening or of a restaurant in Mayfair, you know, it was more like, okay, well, you guys gonna get your way into that location in this random house, and then we'll see what happened.

With no, it was like Ikea furniture outside and some things that we bought in Facebook market, you know, like to have like this, like a couch and, you know, like whatever cheap glasses we had.

Like it wasn't like anything fancy, but the idea was the important thing.

It felt pretty fancy to us, I'll be honest.

It was quite early in the life of this podcast as well, I think, wasn't it?

It was.

We weren't, and

we actually don't get invited to loads of like stuff like that very vaguely anyway, even now.

Like, you should.

I said something on Instagram.

There's something you do.

It's true email normally.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, but they know you're going to post about it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You know,

you got to scratch their back.

You got to play the game.

That's why I only say yes to ones that I know I'm going to like anyway.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

No, but it's good stuff.

Yeah, but it's, I think it's very important to be part of a wider community, like not only inviting food, like people that are like restaurateurs or chefs or journalists, also to get to connect with other people because at the end of the day, the restaurant is not going to have only chefs eating there.

You know, like it's not, I mean, like,

it's amazing when someone from the industry comes because we get excited because

we are part of the same industry, but at the end of the day, you have like guests that are from all different backgrounds, you know.

So, and then also it's just great to meet cool people like you guys, you know?

So, yes, yes, it is

your dream starter, Santiago.

So, the dream starter is a combination.

So we have one that is just like a like a very simple agua chile.

So aguachile means water and chili.

And and it's this is this like a seafood like traditionally is this seafood like bucket of like it's like a big bucket or as like a like a water glass, but like big jog of seafood with cucumber juice and chili and lime juice and different things.

So then I will I will say I would love to have it with, with uh i mean it's gonna sound really strange but well not strange but a bit niche but anyways it's a pink snail so we have in mexico we have this amazing snail that is the conk so you know this like big snails sea snail so inside the flesh is pink and it's uh and the texture is like having like the creamiest melon you know that you can imagine so then that and a little bit of onion and uh maybe avocado and um and then that will be kind kind of my aguachile.

So this is something fresh.

You have to have something fresh.

And then that's just on the side.

Okay.

And then

the main starter will be this lobster tacos.

So in Baja, in Baja California, it's one of the best experiences I ever had.

So there is a place called Puerto Nuevo that is around 40 minutes south of Tijuana in Baja California.

So what they do there is they go and fish the lobsters and they cut them in half and then they have this big walk, like massive walk, where they put pork fat on them, on the wok and they cook it in the open fire on the beach.

And then they open the lobsters and they cook them from the shell side first.

And then when they are like almost perfectly cooked, they flip them over.

and then the the middle of the of the lobster gets like gets like crispy and super golden but still super juicy so they give you a whole lobster like that with some flour tortillas that they do with with wheat flour and pork fat that they roll in there in the beach as well and they cook them there with some rice and some beans and salsa the idea is that they give you a plate you take the lobster you scoop it out whole like the whole half of the lobster and you make like your own kind of wrap and you put rice on it beans and then the salsa on top and you eat it and it just you cry basically yeah it's just tears you know like tears of joy i could see ed out.

So, my peripheral vision there, I was looking at you, but every time you would get like to another detail, Ed's body would just move as one, like,

like he was like, oh no.

He nearly cried at the description.

Man, oh, man.

No, it's really.

I was there.

I was there with you.

Yeah.

At the campfire.

But he's just a lobster.

I was completely, you know, I was a lobster.

I was you.

I was someone else.

I was the sea.

No, but this is a real experience, you know, and it's something that sometimes I'll be like, oh, I wish I was there.

And it gives you hope, you know, it's just, it's just a great, great thing.

And, you know, like, you can do it anywhere else.

But, I mean, I think in this dream meal, you can travel to different places.

Yeah.

So, so then if you go there to have the starter, then we go somewhere else.

Yeah.

Yeah, of course.

Ed, can you guess what I want to ask about?

The main thing I'd like to ask about out of all of the things Santiago just said.

Oh, I don't know.

Sorry,

I was so transfixed.

The conch.

You want to know about the pink snail?

Yes.

The creamy melon snail.

Yes, because

how long has that been, have people been eating that?

Because I would guess...

The big snail that lives in the sea for ages was getting away with not being eaten.

I imagine for a while he was like at the bottom of the sea, a massive snail, safe in his shell, going, no one knows I taste like a creamy melon.

No one has any idea I taste like a creamy melon.

But you think the snail knows instinctively that it tastes like a creamy melon maybe in between snails they know yeah

i taste like a creamy melon and no one knows it

and i look gross no one's gonna scoop me out of it no it's it's a very traditional thing to eat in the caribbean right there's people that um you know like in these different islands that what they do is to just like just find these snails and just scoop them out and eat them in the like they they actually you spend some time there like they um they take you in in the boat and they found the snails they open them up and then they make you the like a ceviche in the boat wow it's amazing but in mexico it's not so traditional but it's it's been

now this there's places where you can eat that you can you can fish them for for like a little bit of time you know like like three four months a year and then you have to stop so they reproduce and then you can use them again i mean like you can use clams as well for that or shrimps you know like you can just put whatever you want in there you you know you'll have a hundred percent conk i

yeah i have the snail i have this nail yeah nothing but the snail i mean we're off to a flying start that's absolutely delicious uh i want to try all of that and i'm glad that you've immediately hacked it and had a side dish for your starter as well i think you might be the first person to use the phrase for my main starter yes

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Your dream main course.

Is there a main main here and a side main?

It is

also, I think this is also an experience.

One of my favorite things to do is to cook like whole animals, like a roast whole animal.

And one of my favorites is the

lamb.

So you have these lambs that you cook in the cross, like a Patagonian style.

And you make a bonfire.

You open the lamb.

So it's like nice and tight in the cross.

And then you just salt it.

Like you put loads of salt in it, you rub it for like about two, three hours and then just leave it.

And then after that, you made a bonfire and then you basically stick the cross close to the bonfire so the lamb starts cooking really slowly, first from the inside.

and then you flip it to make the skin crispy.

And while you're cooking it, you make a mix of like chopped garlic, water, lime juice, and maybe some herbs like thyme or rosemary and then you can put it like in a literally like a plastic bottle or like a just like a squeeze bottle or whatever and then just kind of squeeze the spray it with that while you're cooking it so it takes around three hours to cook three and a half hours something like that so while you're having your starters and you know like having some sparkling still water and having a laugh or something you're cooking that and then when it's ready what you do is to pull the meat out of the lamb and then I was laughing because Ed just slumped forward like

they're just like I literally thought Ed's entire microphone was gonna go down his throat and into his tummy like he just oh like it was too much for him as soon as you might pull in the lamb he's like you pull the lamb he's like oh

what he's like you know when the lamb is ready yeah you press the skin so when when it's already crispy you press it and you feel you hear the crackling but also all the juices are like dripping down like yeah and uh

so then when you when you pull it out then you can literally just squeeze the piece of meat there will be like lots of lots of juice you know so it's amazing anyways that's that's like the main thing and then you can have like some fresh tortillas to make your own tacos of lamb yeah uh in in mexico normal you will have like a piece of wood like a chopping board you know and then with like a big cleaver and then you i will put the lamb and then just pull the meat out and then just chop it with a cleaver, like

and then have like different sides that you can decide, you know, because I don't know who am I with.

Are we together having whoever you want to you?

It's your dream, really.

It's your dream slash last meal.

Yeah,

you're about to die, remember?

We're not going to be offended if we're not there.

No, it just depends, you know, because some people

the best meal I'd ever had, and he's just hearing about it.

So it depends, you know, who but you can you can have mashed potatoes or you can just do like tacos with it, or you can have it like as a banker's with like some roasted braised purple cabbage and mashed potatoes and like a like a lamb sauce, or you could have like a more Mexican thing, just like tacos of lamb.

So yeah, so that's the main course.

Incredible.

Have you ever buried a lamb?

What?

Have you ever like

dug a pit

a fire in there and then let it go out a bit and put some damp hay on there and then put the lamb in there and bury it and then cooked it that way?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's barbacoa.

So that's a different thing.

Yeah, so then for that one, you have to break down the lamb first.

So you just separate

by different parts.

And then there's two different styles in Mexico, birria and barbacoa.

So with the birria, you have to do like a chili paste, like with different chilies and like maybe tomato, garlic, onion you blend that into like paste like a marinate and then you marinate the lamb with it and then you normally in Mexico we'll wrap it with agave leaves so like burnt agave leaves it looks like um like a lore vera but like really big and then you wrap wrap the lamb with that and then underneath you put a pot and like and like a steaming tray so then all the juices from the lamb and the and the and the agave drip into the water underneath so it becomes a broth so you will normally have that and then you cook that with stones you put wood then stones then with the wood the fire consumes then the stones are really hot so it can keep the heat and then you you you close that down with like leaves and soil and then so then it becomes like a sort of pressure cooker and that and it cooks for a long time and then you have that in the morning so you you have breakfast uh you just like normally in the fields so you just open that up take the lamb out and then you have people doing tortillas in there in the side and then you just have that as a as a breakfast with the broth in the scythe, you know?

Yeah, of the juices, you know.

So that's barbacoa.

So that's how you do it, Paul.

Yeah, that's beer.

Yeah, exactly.

There's a lot of steps in that that I think a friend of ours didn't do.

Yeah, really.

Yeah, and that might be why his land came out raw.

Yeah.

Like as raw as when him and his best friend did it in the soft touches garden.

Yeah, in soft touches garden.

Yeah.

I was let me know.

I can I can go next time and just do it.

Yeah, sure.

Well, I think, yeah,

we'll let him know because he needs

No, it's good.

Like, if anyone does like one of those things, I like to go.

It's good to do it.

You normally don't have a big whole lab

and a lot of people.

So it's good to do it.

It's not a lot of gardens.

Yeah, exactly.

It's just not something that you do every day.

Like in Mexico, the restaurants will have a backyard underground oven, some restaurants, and they will do the lamb there.

But we don't have that here.

We can't dig holes in Marlebon.

Unfortunately.

but i also like the sound of this jesus lamb yeah i like that one i just i just think this easier yeah and also i like the roasted flavor of the skin like the the caramelization that you don't get when the lamb is cooked under the ground you don't get that because it's steamed i mean it's still really delicious but you don't get this roasted flavor i'd rather the roasted flavor so also but when you're describing it and and you know obviously i've just got my friend here next to me like flopping his body all over the place and drawing all over the shop and it's the whole thing.

But like when you were saying about you had it there for a long time and you can go up and then you just pull the meat and you test it and stuff.

The bit in the Jesus crucifixion story that has never really made sense to me is that

the

Roman centurion goes over to him at the end just to check that he's he's dead.

He sticks a spear in his side and does that.

And it sounds like quite a similar thing.

I'm like, they're like, right, I think he's done now.

And he goes over and just puts a spear in him.

Yeah.

And he's like yeah yeah yeah that's he's done that's all the juices coming down

yeah i'm not sure about that

as a kid i was always like i don't get why they're doing that surely they know yeah but the lamb is dead

or not why is the centurion going santiago makes a good point the lamb is dead already before you put on you're not checking to see if it's dead or not yeah exactly yeah you're checking if he's cooked or not you know Like if he's cooked to perfection or not.

No, I thought he was just getting a lamb.

Please never do this.

Because you are going to get a live lamb, put it on a crucifix.

yeah exactly you can't do that yes it's going to be check if it's dead or not before saving a draw

it takes about 10 minutes for the wool to burn to get a dead first that's important hard to get a yeah but i wasn't i think i wasn't as specific about that yeah yeah the lamb was dead and had a good debt before he was marinated with the salt yeah yeah when you did i wasn't as specific about that do you bet two other criminal lambs either side yeah two criminals that's very important

It depends how many guests comes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But I mean, like, I think one lamb is enough for like 12 people.

12, 15 people.

Disciples.

The Last Supper.

It is the Last Supper.

It is our Last Supper.

Yeah, there we go.

We need more people.

This is great.

Your dream side dish.

We've obviously had some side dishes, dishes, but if you were going to allow those as part of the main course, you'd have to mash the potatoes as part of the main course.

We'll let you have a different side dish.

It was like a really good, really well-made guacamole.

So in the south of Mexico, and in different places, actually, in Mexico, you have this

avocado that is...

You know what avocado means, by the way?

Can we guess?

Have a guess.

Is it something rude?

Rude.

Are we walking around going, oh, avocado is certainly dishes?

Something rude.

What do you think of that?

Avocado.

It means like goblin jizz or something.

Interesting.

So goblin jizz is Ed's guess.

We should make a point.

I don't think there's any need for me to guess after that.

No, what about like what you think avocado looks like?

Well, I guess, I mean, now he's made me think it's rude.

So testicle?

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

It was rude.

It's not rude.

Not as rude as goblin jizz, you absolute maniac.

But testicles are not rude.

Yes, testicles are medical.

It depends where they are depends where they are yeah true we're popping these in our mouths on the body and geographically

we're popping these testicles in our mouth santiago

that's right yeah that's right we're covering them in lime juice and uh yeah and gobbling them up no it's uh it does mean that so avocado

um in spanish is aguacate that comes from the word avoc uh aguacatu and means testicles because you know i don't know why but anyways well they do i guess if you put two of them next to each other you could look like a couple of big old sonyas absolutely yeah

anyways uh apart from the definition of the one if yours do look like that go to a doctor yes do go to a doctor yeah and uh that was sending the package yeah

every time it's important also like if you ever if you're ever checking yourself yeah you know if they're ripe or not yeah

so when we go around the supermarket and people squeeze the avocados it's like they're checking themselves oh they're checking no they're checking, they're checking, yeah.

They're just checking, checking someone else, someone else, checking someone else, yeah, yeah,

anyways.

Um, I think we went to a different direction with this, but and it's uh guacamole.

So, the

guacamole means

no, not yet, no, it's a

mole means blend, yeah, right.

So, avocado, a guacatu, so then it's is mole, it's it's blend avocado, basically.

So, that's what guacamole means.

So there is an amazing avocado from different parts of Mexico that is the criollo avocado that you can eat the skin.

Oh, wow.

And the skin tastes like licorice.

So it's like incredible.

So then I will do a guacamole with that kind of avocado.

And guacamole normally has the avocado.

If you have this avocado, you can eat the skin.

You can chop the skin.

and then mix it with some chopped onions and lime juice and then leave that for a little bit and and then add it to the to the avocado and then some chopped coriander and chopped serrano chilies and that's it

with maybe some chopped tomato as well yeah so then that's it like our guacamole doesn't have any olive oil or any mayonnaise or anything like i don't know like some people are those some of the biggest what what are the what's the worst mistake you've ever seen what's the worst thing mayonnaise people adding mayonnaise

yeah you had mayonnaise no no

i don't do it but like i'm aware that we constantly get it wrong in this country.

And I can only imagine how you feel when you see the kind of potted guacamole that's in like

cream fridge or something like that.

No dairy, no.

Yeah, exactly.

It's really simple and really good.

So then that would be

the side dish.

Just like a really beautiful guacamole.

Add that to a bit of the lamb as well.

Yeah, exactly.

Exactly.

It needs to come together, you know?

Yeah.

We don't need to invite 12 people to this.

I reckon I could do three quarters of that.

Yeah, yeah.

Ed's got this covered.

Easily do it.

And there's no like tortillas or anything with the yeah, yeah, some tortillas

with the lamb.

Of course.

But you also have some of the hachipura left, so you can also put lamb in there.

And yeah, just for the brave, just some lamb.

I'm brave.

I've got a massive set of avocados in there.

Well, congratulations, man.

Can you remember the first time like you had like, so a dish like guacamole, like you must have had your whole life But like can you remember like having it for the first time and it being like wow This is like I think it's just something that you just grow up with you know Yeah, you don't think about it so much but when you start thinking about it is when you don't have it I've been living out of Mexico for now 14 years and I remember the first two three years it was like man I need avocado you know like it is something that you just really miss and I think 14 years ago like it wasn't as easy to get avocados from like in somewhere else.

Now you can get avocados from like portugal and spain and that they they grow there like naturally but yeah it was uh like when you miss it is when you're like oh and then you go back to mexico you're like yes you have it yeah so it's one of those things but it just in a way it kind of keeps it special it's hard to get really good avocados here in uh in the uk at the moment actually in coal we do a courgette guacamole so we just sliced courgett and we cook them and mix them with hemp seeds to give like creaminess and some fermented gooseberry juice and chilies and and we do this uh like guacamole like avocado free guacamole that is amazing and is that because you can't get the right salad yeah exactly yeah so the thing is that when you reference up something is so good you don't want to do something that is not good enough because then it's just like oh why am i doing this so then that's why that's one of the reasons why we don't use ingredients from mexico in coal because it's just not gonna be as good so then we'd rather to find something else that could be its own thing.

Maybe it's not the same, but it's similar and it's good in its own unique way.

Your dream drink.

Mezcal.

Of course.

Yeah, no, I mean, like, I was thinking something a little bit different, but I think it's the flavor, but also it's just the fact that it just makes you be really open-minded.

I think something about Mezcal that like not a lot of people know is the way that it makes you feel.

Like, how drinks make you feel?

I mean, like, obviously, like, drunk, maybe.

You drink too much, but in which James's stomach is going crazy right now.

And it has

been for the last 10 minutes.

James's stomach, and I'm the one who's freaking out about the menu over here.

And James's stomach is going insane.

My stomach sounds like a haunted well.

It's absolutely

insane.

Just like,

sorry for for the interruption, Santi.

That is a couple of times.

No problem.

I'm trying to get it to shut up.

Maybe your stomach wants to get involved.

Yeah.

Oh, it absolutely does.

That's what I hear.

So

I'm excited.

An extra little microphone.

Yeah, yeah.

So what does the stomach feel?

Oh, that's very interesting.

So this is the way that makes you feel, you know, like which, or think about how drinks make you feel.

I think that is something that we normally don't think about too much.

And Mezcal makes you feel like joy and also it gives you a boost of energy and it also allows you to be more open in your like conversation and stuff like that so that's how normally have mezcal like we have mezcal with food as well it's not a digestive it's it's a it's a drink that you have with your food that we have with your lamb and it will allow you to just like keep you know having a great time and uh and feel great and also if you survive this meal you don't get a hangover the next day you know so I can I can have like a lot of mescal and then the next day, as soon as you drink water, it's important before you go to sleep, just a little water and then the next day you're fine.

It's a miraculous drink because it's made from natural ingredients.

Yeah, but

I hear this about a lot of drinks.

I hear this about natural wine.

I hear this about the, oh, you don't get hangover.

It's not true.

But do you drink water before you go to bed?

I always drink water before I go to bed.

The problem is, I don't think I've ever had a night where I've drunk one type of alcohol.

Yeah.

It's the problem.

Yeah, it's all about one type.

Yeah, we're nice now.

Yeah, it's all about lovely, old-fashioned.

Yeah, it's all about one type, but then the right type made with natural things that don't have chemicals.

So Mescal, it's

the one.

But anyway, it's also, it tastes delicious and it's great.

Because let me tell you, when we came for that meal at your house, we definitely had a hangover the next day.

Yes.

James left early.

He tried to leave me.

Yeah, the mascot in the mascot made me feel feel scared and confused.

I had to get out of there.

I was like, what the fuck am I doing in the stranger's kitchen?

This is fucking nuts.

He fed us ants when we arrived.

I'm getting out of here right now.

Ed went to the toilet.

And while Ed was in the toilet, I was like, I'm going now.

I'm immediately leaving.

Because that's the one guy I know.

Yeah.

He's left me.

He's in the toilet.

I'm fucked.

I came out and I caught you getting into an Uber.

He caught me getting into the Uber.

I was like, bye, Ed.

You're like, what are you doing?

And leave me here with Professor Green.

Yeah, that's true.

That's true.

But that night, we had some crazy, like, coffee mescal.

Yeah.

Yeah, that was good.

That was the thing.

Like, Mescal can be also infused with different things and it will give you whatever you want.

You know, like a great experience, you know, there's so many different types.

There's one that is called the Pechuga Mescal that means breast.

And

this whole menu is all over the place.

I'm going to say right now, you're pervert, mate.

Everything you're ordering, this means testicle, this means means breast i want it all no

i'm just saying what it means yeah yeah no but i i have a point i have a point yes we'll google these afterwards and if it if it doesn't mean these things yeah you're in big trouble you're in big trouble man

what does call mean

what's fonder mean

wait so it means because we are using um a turkey breast yeah

so what you do is to make the mescal and put this uh turkey breast into the mescal the mescal has normally two distillations so you take the plant cook it for like

the plant has in the middle some sort of pineapple so it looks like a pineapple the core so then sometimes you have to wait for that plant to be 12 14 or sometimes like 30 years old for you to be able to take it and use it so it has enough sugars developed.

And what we do is to take out the leaves of the plant and then these pineapples, they get cooked for seven days and then you crush them and you fill them with water and then it has this natural fermentation like it becomes like a myth

and then after that it gets destilly distillate twice so then pechuga means that you will add something else to get extra flavor and then you distillate the third time so traditionally you use turkey breast with fruits So you put maybe some mandarins, maybe some sugar cane,

other like local fruits and a turkey breast.

And

you make a distillation and then you get the liquid.

It doesn't taste like chicken, but it has the oils of the turkey breast.

And

it's really, really rich.

And then what they do with this coffee mescal, what they do is instead of the turkey breast, they use coffee.

So they put the coffee, you know, for the distillation.

And you can also infuse it with coffee as well.

So yeah, it's funny because you go to these places and they have always a turkey running around.

and

it's like friends of the family, everything, you know, but they wait for Christmas or for a wedding to basically use that turkey for making that special mescal for the celebration.

And is that the mescal you want on your dream menu?

Pechuga.

Yeah,

let's do it.

Let's do it.

Let's do a pechuga.

You don't want the coal mescal because you do your own masking.

Yeah, I mean, like, yes, of course.

I mean, we'll have a lot of different ones.

Okay.

I have a feeling that throughout your meal, there'll be mescals.

cells.

I think we'll have like, yeah, maybe later as well for the after party.

So we need to have an after party with a meal, though.

Yeah, yeah, of course.

Nice.

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your dream dessert it will be cheesecake so it's a little bit of like a nostalgia kind of thing because

I used to sell cheesecake when I was like 15 years old.

No, less.

I think it was like 14 or 13 years old, 14.

And I came up with this like recipe of cheesecake, like really traditional.

I think someone told me like, oh, you know what?

Like you can make cheesecake like this.

I was like, oh, right.

And I just did it at home.

And then I used to sell it.

And then it became like this family recipe.

And then my mom used to sell it as well, like in school, like she's a teacher.

And then I will sell it to the teachers and stuff like that.

And if I sell 10 slices, I could go out on the Friday, you know?

So then I was like counting the slices that I could sell.

And then my brother got the recipe and started selling to restaurants.

Like after I left my hometown, he kind of like put his own, like when he, I was 14, my brother, he was 11 and he learned the recipe.

Wow.

And then when he was 15, he...

He's more of a businessman.

So he will go to like, I mean, he was 14 years old, but he will go to restaurants to sell the cheesecake.

So it was like famous there in my hometown.

And then when we left, my mom made the cheesecake herself.

And then now we are doing this cheesecake actually in Fonda.

We're going to have the

Santiago's cheesecake in the menu.

And it's just like one of those things, like with desserts, I'm not really a dessert person as much.

And I could ask for like something really strange, but or just like a piece of watermelon.

I really like watermelon.

But I think, you know, like it's nice to like remember good.

the good old days you know the cheesecake you know so yeah um i'd love to know what your sales pitch was when you were selling the slices of cheesecake to the teachers

when you were 13.

I don't remember.

I think it was like more like word of mouth.

I gave some cheesecake to try to the teachers and to the students, like a drug dealer.

Let's just call it a little free section.

Yeah, you don't have to pay for that.

Yeah, exactly.

Lovely cheesecake.

And then

I come crawling back, shivery.

Your brother watches.

I need some more cheesecake, man.

Yeah, exactly.

I mean, like, it wasn't supposed to be a business.

Yeah.

It's like one of those things that I wasn't like, oh my God, I got to like make money.

It was more like, I just want to share it.

Like, I made it.

I bring it to my school and I share it.

But then suddenly people were like, oh, you don't have a little bit more of that cheesecake.

And I'm like, yeah, sure.

I can make some more.

So I will come like the next day with cheesecake.

And then suddenly people will be like, oh,

I want to buy some.

for my wife, you know, like the teacher.

And I was like, oh, the teacher.

Yeah.

Okay.

I'm going to buy something from my wife.

Yeah.

So my kind of like ventured in Mexico was like, your little businessman.

Yeah, everyone's just got the teachers are kids.

Yeah.

So then like that, then suddenly I was like, okay, well, maybe I'm going to sell by the slice.

Yeah.

You know, so you make more money with it, like if you sell it by the slice.

I think the slice was, was like, maybe like ADP, the slice or something like that, that, which it was.

That's cool.

That's good.

That was good.

And then suddenly then people got a bit obsessed with the cheesecake.

So then I will bring like quite, I will make quite a lot of cheesecake, which it was good.

Yeah.

So it's one of those things that I think there's like when I was a kid as well, I will bring even like homemade like.

agua fresca like or chata or or or like sharing things that you make with your friends or with people that you know it's something that i remember enjoying a lot since I was like eight years old or something, you know, but then suddenly you can actually cook something.

Yeah.

And then if you actually can make money with it, it's like the dream.

I was like making my cheesecakes and I'm like, yes, you know, like I'm just living the dream, you know?

Like.

Was it a baked cheesecake?

Yeah, it's a baked.

It's a baked cheesecake.

And it has this like a cookie, like very traditional cookie base that is a bit similar as the DJ Steve's cookies that you have here.

And they're just blended as a powder with butter, with like melted butter, and then you make the crust.

And they have condensed milk, evaporated milk, and fresh cheese, like Philadelphia cheese, and a little bit of vanilla and eggs.

You blend that and put it in the middle, bake it.

And then we use blackberry jam on top.

And that's it.

It doesn't really have anything else, but it's just, yeah, it's just iconic.

Imagine like your mom just being like, my kids have started a cheesecake business.

My kids started wearing a Rolex.

Where's all this money coming from?

Make it into their phones horizontally,

walking around,

yelling at people.

That's incredible.

That sounds delicious.

And you know what?

I'll throw in a slice of watermelon for you.

Nice as well.

I think.

Nice.

I'll send that over at the end of the day.

For the after party.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like watermelon after party.

Watermelon theme after party.

You got the fact about watermelons.

Do they mean something rude at Perth?

I just love it.

Just love watermelon.

I think it's just the fact that like my dad, my family's dad,

they're from Spain.

And I remember going to Spain and I used to live there.

I lived there for four years.

And they do these parties in the streets.

where big truck will come with watermelons.

I was like, what the?

And it's just, it's free watermelon for everyone.

Wow.

In the little town.

And they just like big truck, like huge watermelons.

It's hot, like, like today.

It's a hot day.

And then they put like a big table.

They cut the watermelons in big slices.

And then you just eat it.

Like, you just like literally just like bite into it.

And like, it's just incredible.

So I love watermelons.

What are you doing with the peps?

There's some people that have problems with the watermelon

seats.

Yeah.

Like phobia kind of thing as well.

So I think I I just sorry about those people.

I'm just necklacing.

You like, yeah, the seeds.

Yeah, they're going down.

Yeah,

I think my grandmother used to say that a watermelon will grow in your stomach if you eat one of those.

Great.

Love watermelon.

Yeah.

I don't even have to eat it.

It grows in my stomach because it's already there.

That's where it was going anyway.

And I used to think that the pregnant ladies ate watermelons.

So I was like, oh my God.

So I thought that

that was like people that had that,

you know, like victims of the watermelon seats.

Yes, Benito has a question about the cheesecake.

Now, he doesn't involve himself in the edit.

So he's going to ask it, and I'm going to have to repeat it to you.

Even though you can hear him when he says it.

But he thinks people will want to know.

Okay.

Ask away and hold on to your pen, little man.

What is the ratio of biscuit base to cheesecake?

Benito says people will want to know how much biscuit to cheesecake we're talking here.

Not a lot of biscuit.

I mean, like, I think the ratio will be around probably 80% cheesecake and 20%.

But it's coming up the sides as well.

Yeah, like, yeah, exactly.

On the sides and on the bottom, you know?

Yeah.

So, in total, we'll be around 20%

biscuit and then 80%

cheesecake.

Happy Benito?

Yeah, yeah.

We know that by people, you mean you guys.

You're the one who asked it, and there's absolutely no one was ever going to tweet the podcast saying what are the ratios.

Which ratios

you guys like?

I'm happy with anything, to be honest.

Yeah, I'd say...

Take it as it comes.

I'd say I don't.

If the base is too thick,

upon looking at it, I'll be like, oh, that's a bit...

But then

if it's delicious, if the base is like, they've really put a lot of effort into making it taste really nice.

Right.

Great.

I'll tell you what I don't want.

I don't want it to be so thick that when you're putting a fork through it, you get to the biscuit and you're pushing and then you hear the clink of the fork on the plate because it goes through.

Oh,

I don't want want

interesting.

No, that doesn't happen.

I want a bit of, I like the crumbs.

Yeah, a little bit, but it's a little bit crispier in the itch, but not crazy.

Yeah, the one in front that doesn't have the one in the scythe.

Okay.

So it's just the bottom.

I think

I can wait for you to try it.

Yeah, absolutely.

Delicious.

Well, I'm going to read your menu back to you now, see how you feel about it.

This is going to be what I would describe as a festival of mispronunciation.

Well, if I have to mispronounce this because if I get them all right, Ed's going to be flipped into space by his own bonus.

If I'm able to pronounce all of this,

it's so delicious that he's not going to be able to hack it.

So I owe it to the listener to not be able to pronounce this.

Otherwise, I think this podcast is getting censored.

We won't be able to release it.

Water, you would like 50-50.

Still and sparkling with a dash of sea buckthorn juice.

Poggons of bread, you would like catch a purri with sea urchins.

Starter, lobster tacos, and aguachile with pink snail, the conch.

Main course.

I mean, I can't believe we've had all avocados means testicles.

This is breast mescale.

And you didn't say anything about the pink snail.

What are we talking about?

Main course, you would like the bonfired lamb with mash and purple cabbage, side

and tortillas.

And tortillas.

So people miss tacos and salsa.

And salsa.

Salsa.

And salsa.

Don't forget those.

Yes.

Because I think I'd go tortilla.

Yeah, you will have the lamb tacos on one side, and then you also have for the people that don't want tacos, you will have the mash.

I don't want cabbage.

Don't invite those people.

I want mash as well.

Yeah, he wants some.

You go and eat your mash in the corner, man.

We're having tacos.

I'll have tacos too, can't you?

Yeah, both.

You can have both.

Yeah, you can have both.

Why are you saying no?

What the fuck?

You're going to turn around.

He's going to put mash in a tortilla.

I know what he's going to do.

Yeah, you can't put the mash in a torteaux.

I won't do it.

I won't do that.

Okay.

Can't stop you once I'm in.

Side dish, you would like beautiful guacamole with tortillas.

Drink, mezcal, and that's throughout the whole meal.

And dessert, you would like your very own cheesecake and then afterwards a slice of watermelon at the after party.

And more mezcal.

And more mezcal.

And more mezcal, obviously.

Yeah.

That's never stopping.

That's flowing constantly.

Every single type that you could wish for of mezcal.

That's great.

I think the only thing is the guacamole will have totopos or tostadas, like crispy tortillas, basically.

Not soft.

soft.

Yeah, yeah,

yeah, exactly.

Yeah, I mean, imagine, but yeah, that sounds uh, sounds lovely, sounds very good.

Yeah, um, sounds absolutely delicious.

Thank you for your food descriptions as well.

There's going to be a few people re-listening to those, mainly Ed.

Yes,

do them again now.

I'm glad you like it.

Fantastic.

So, pop along to Fonda, go to Cole.

Absolutely.

You're going to have an amazing time.

Santiago, thank you so much for coming to the Dream Restaurant.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

Thanks, man.

Thank you so much to Santiago for coming in.

What a menu.

What a man.

Wow.

Delicious.

I'm glad that we video these episodes now because it will have your reactions.

Yes.

And Benito could do a supercut of you just like, oh,

I think I just

completely like glazed over.

I was there.

I was in the dishes.

You were.

You felt like you were.

by that fire on the beach.

I was the lobster.

I was the lamb.

I was eating myself.

Wow.

That's a good song, Lyric, man.

I was the lobster, I was the lamb.

I was eating myself, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's that's beautiful.

Thanks, man.

Thank you to Santiago, and thank you for not saying Dairy Lee cheese slices as well.

Although, as soon as we heard,

to be fair, as soon as he said the water course, I was like, Yeah, they're not coming up.

We're not having Dairy Lead cheese slices on this.

No one's doing sea buckthorn juice in a half and half water, and then the starter being a pack of Dairy Lee cheese slices.

Yeah, there was never any danger of it.

But that means we can tell you all to go to Fondo, it has just opened.

and also, if you haven't been to Cole, the tasting menu restaurant, you should go there as well.

Both delicious, both delicious, coal, good for a, I guess, a special occasion, yeah,

if you've got room for 17 courses,

which you will, by the way, yeah, because they're all delicious, and you won't want to keep eating them, yeah, go to Cole, uh, and then Fonda for a more casual affair, absolutely, but still, I mean, that cheesecake, man, that sounds good, everyone knows that's as good as in my belly.

Yes, the thing is, when we do good menus like that, I do think I've got to go home and have something like that yeah that's the that's the problem i ain't gonna be able to do any of that you sure you could do like a version of it a version of what i don't know is there another is there a smaller animal you can put in a crucifix and like just put in your oven yeah maybe like i don't know like a i could do a snail probably i could do a snail aguachile but it would be from sort of snails that are outside in the garden yeah yeah that might be nice

no no no it would not be nice i might do a slow roast lamb and put it in tacos.

There you go.

You can do that.

That sounds delicious, Ed.

Thank you.

And thank you.

We will see you next week on the Off Menu podcast.

We're very welcome.

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Hello, I'm Carrie Add.

I'm Sarah.

And we we are the Weirdos Book Club podcast.

We are doing a very special live show as part of the London Podcast Festival.

The date is Thursday, 11th of September, the time is 7pm, and our special guest is the brilliant Alan Davies.

Tickets from kingsplace.co.uk.

Single ladies is coming to London.

True on Saturday, the 13th of September.

At the London Podcast Festival.

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