Ep 193: Arlo Parks

James, huge news from the world of off-menu and indeed the world of the world.

Yes.

Ever heard of the Royal Albert Hall?

I have.

We've done live shows there.

And guess what?

We're doing more live shows there next year.

Sure, a lot of them are sold out already.

But we thought, hey, throw these guys a bone.

Let's put on one final Royal Albert Hall show in that run.

The show will be on Monday, the 16th of March.

It's going to be a tasting menu, a returning guest coming back, receiving the menu of another previous guest.

Those shows have been a lot of fun.

We cannot wait to do them live.

Who will we pull out of our little magic bag?

You'll have to come along on the 16th of March to find out.

If I'm correct in thinking, presale tickets go on pre-sale on the 10th of September.

Pre-sale tickets are 10th of September at 10 a.m.

And then the general sale is 12th of September at 10 a.m.

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The day in between is for reflecting.

Get your tickets from royalalberthall.com Hall.com or offmenupodcast.co.uk.

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Welcome to the Off Menu Podcast, Shaking the Bottle of the Internet, opening the lid of friendship, and spraying the fizzy foam of humor all over the faces of our listeners.

My name is James A.

Cassidy as a gamble.

We own a dream restaurant and every week we invite a guest in and ask them their favourite ever start and main course dessert, side dish and drink, not in that order.

And this week our guest is

Arlo Parks.

Arlo Parks, a wonderful musician, James.

One of the most exciting musicians in the UK right now.

Nay the world.

Is that how people talk?

Yes, nay the world.

But very, very excited.

I mean, Arlo's last album won the Mercury Music Prize.

And her new album, My Soft Machine, is out this week.

Very excited to get to talk to Arlo about that.

Very excited to hear the album as well.

Big rival, though, James, to your album, My Soft Serve Machine, which came out last week.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's from the heart, that album.

And if people want to listen to it, I really would appreciate it because

a lot of ballads on there.

Yes, yeah.

About the serve.

Yeah.

Very excited to hear Arlo's new album.

She's absolutely brilliant.

But of course, James, there there will be a secret ingredient.

Yes.

And if Arlo picks it,

she's out of here.

As always, hey, then's the rules.

And this week, the ingredient which we have deemed to be unacceptable is

cola.

Cola.

Why is that, James?

Now, listen.

Sometimes we choose an ingredient that we don't like to eat or that one of the listeners doesn't like to eat.

Sometimes we just choose something that is associated with the guest.

And Arlo has a song called Cola.

Yes.

So we're like, right, let's go for it.

But we're a little bit apprehensive because we are a bit worried because that gets chosen as a dream drink a lot.

Yes.

And also,

why did Arlo have a song about it?

Yes, probably because she loves cola.

She loves cola, right?

Surely.

And you know, I'm going to back up the decision here because I like diet Coca-Cola.

I like Pepsi Max.

Yeah.

But cola suggests to me like supermarket own brand cola, which I do not like.

Yeah, okay.

Okay.

Well, I do not like it.

I think

if Arlo says Diet Coke or something, that doesn't count.

No, because that's a brand.

Yeah.

I think she says Coca-Cola.

We've got to...

Yeah.

But can't we then go where from?

And if she says Morrison's own,

this is how we're interpreting it.

I'm interpreting it as just any full fat cola.

Okay, I don't like it.

You don't like that?

No.

I guess if it happens, we can debate it with Arlo.

Yes.

And see how Arlo feels.

And obviously, she knows what that song's about.

She can say, no, I I was talking about this.

So if you're doing it because of the song, then it's got to be that.

Yeah.

All right.

Okay.

Well, we'll cross that bridge if we come to it.

Hopefully we won't cross that bridge.

Yeah.

And just for the record, for the listener, I would never put Diet Coke as the secret ingredient.

No, man.

You love it.

I love it.

I love Coke Zero.

I love Pepsi Max.

I love Diet Pepsi.

James is hungover today.

Oh, man.

Because we're recording this on a Sunday, which is very rare for us.

It's on Sunday.

I'm hungover.

Yeah.

Without further ado, this is the off-menu menu of Arlo Parks!

Welcome, Arlo, to the Dream Restaurant.

Thank you.

Hello.

Welcome, Arlo Parks, to the Dream Restaurant.

We've been expecting you for some time.

Here we are.

Ah, here we are.

I like that intro.

Genie, I'm a genie.

I know, I like that.

My genie comes out of a lamp and I can get you any food you want.

This is the first time.

Well, no, this is the last couple of records.

We've actually had the lamp in the studio as well.

Oh, level with you.

I didn't even notice it until you

just pointed it out.

Was it in another one?

Yeah, it was in the other day when we were recording.

Didn't notice it?

No.

I had no idea.

But then I'm used to lamps because I'm a genie, so I wouldn't notice it as much.

Not that big a deal to me.

Ah, yes.

No, that does make sense.

But yeah, you like it.

You like the lamp?

It's quite an Aladdin vibe.

Yeah, I was going to say.

But I feel like that's where genies live, right?

Yeah, definitely.

I mean, that's where you live, right?

Yeah, I live in Aladdin.

Yeah, yeah.

And I've asked for the Aladdin style lamp.

But what other lamps do you imagine genies are living in then?

Because surely that's bedside.

Huh?

Bedside?

Bedside.

Bedside lamp?

Is that a thing?

A bedside lamp.

Yeah, no, I know.

No, no.

Come, Carlos.

You've never heard of a bedside lamp.

I know you've moved to LA.

I've been in LA, but they do have lumps.

They do have lumps in LA.

That would be a big breaking news story if it turned out you didn't know what a bedside lamp was.

Yeah, no, I can confirm that I do.

Yeah, I do.

Yes.

How many uh don't normally ask this.

How many lamps you got in your house do you reckon?

I feel like I've got yeah about eight.

I would say eight lamps.

That's a good amount.

Yeah.

Spread throughout the house or all just in all in one in one concentration.

Yes.

I would say I'm trying to think now if I asked someone how many lamps they've got in their house, how many they would have to say for me to think that's too many lamps, even if I haven't seen their house.

I think if they said anything 20 and above, actually maybe even 15.

I was going to say 15 lamps is quite a vast quantity of lamps in one house.

I'm trying to think how many lamps I've got now.

I think I've got...

It might be 15.

You haven't got 15 lamps.

I might have 15 lamps.

How do you know?

I'll pick the house.

Yeah,

you didn't go in the lamp room.

Oh, yeah.

I didn't go in the lamp room, to be fair for you.

Let's not talk about lamps.

Let's talk about Arla's new album.

Your new album.

comes out this Friday.

Yeah.

It's very exciting.

What can people expect?

I feel like it's, I don't know, I wanted to surprise people a bit with this record.

I feel like it, it just kind of expands the world of what I've already built.

And I just wanted to show people the music that I grew up with, the music that they may not know that I like,

and get more involved in the production myself and just make something new.

Yeah.

Well, it must be because your life's changed a lot since the last album.

Like your career's changed a lot and you're living in a completely different part of the world and stuff.

And does that inform everything and make you approach it differently?

Definitely.

I mean, I feel like you're always kind of soaking up what's around you, like geographically, and also having toured so so much and having made new friends and just having like learned a lot about myself and just seeing the world a bit more.

I definitely think that bleeds into the music.

There's always a danger with comedians that when you end up touring a lot and doing all of that sort of stuff, the next show you write is all about service stations.

Yes.

Is that also a danger as a musician?

Like if you're constantly on the road.

I think so.

I've definitely heard some records where I'm like, you haven't really been anywhere but service stations in like the depths of Germany.

It definitely has that vibe sometimes.

Yeah, some musicians can really pull that off from like the road,

the road, and you're like, Oh, yeah, it's so very romantic.

The idea of just being on the road, and then other people is like, Yeah, I think it's just talked about having a steak bait from Greg's

not as enticing.

What is your favorite food to have on the road?

On the road, I don't know.

I feel like I'm I feel like I try and stay quite healthy on the road, but like I like to say it like the road, yeah.

I don't know what they usually have it depends where you are.

I feel like sometimes when you tour in certain places the there's like a specific staple like in Germany there's just like brat bursts and they'll just have like a little cage of brat bursts just spinning around and it's it's always quite an ominous and ominous thing to see a little cage a little yeah it's in like a tiny little cage and they're just spinning yeah if you've been on the road you'll know what I'm talking about sorry I've clearly I've been on a different road I've never seen the cage of bratver

yeah that sounds like the nightclub situation there's a cage cage of brat versus in the middle, just like spinning around going for it.

Yeah, exciting, actually.

Yeah,

I know I'm gonna see the brat versus cage.

Um, I mean, when we started doing standard,

when did you start touring?

Like, how long long ago?

Because, like, honestly,

about 15 years ago, just after the pandemic is the first time I was probably touring.

I've been doing music for five years, but I didn't really, really tour until I was still at school before the pandemic.

what

yeah so it's only been only been a few years for me but i did like 125 shows last year so i was like really yeah i was on the road did you have like uh is a favorite place to talk you sound like you've gone to a bunch of different countries japan was really nice oh yeah i love japan i'm going back this year i'm doing japan and also i'm doing seoul so yeah that part of the world i'd never been to before and i did this little kind of like travel show with mtv as well where i got to experience like all the japanese spas and get food cooked by this like 84 year old Buddhist monk who like only cooks for like the president.

It was insane.

Yeah, I had a great time.

Wow.

You were in school a few years ago.

I leveled up.

It was like, yeah, life changed fast.

Do you consider yourself a foodie?

Are you like big on food?

Yeah, I would say so.

I feel like I spend a lot of my time cooking when I am at home.

I'm just very like particular with what I wake up and I know exactly what I want to eat that whole day.

Yeah.

Or for the the whole day for the whole day you've got it mapped out immediately yeah today was it too collectively right yeah yeah yeah i was feeling it yeah you were feeling it too was in the air maybe it's because we're going to meet arlo arlo knows what she wants the whole day yeah so i was there like i just know i know what i want immediately yeah and it was because i was vibing on whatever i was plugged into the arlo parks main thing main thing yeah yeah and also the big sushi cage they have there oh yes it's very tempting isn't it the sushi cages rolling around

it's all just coming apart as it rolls as it rolls around.

It goes so fast.

It's just

rice

falling through the bars.

What's your Itsu order?

I always have just the avocado baby rolls.

Because

I can't have fish.

I'm allergic.

So sushi is a strange choice, but that specific thing is the only thing that I can have and do have from Itsu.

Avocado baby rolls seems like a very demeaning thing to call some something.

Are you a baby?

Avocado baby rolls.

Avocado baby rolls.

I don't know.

If if someone started calling me avocado baby rolls,

I'd quite like it.

I think that's the nice, affectionate.

Yeah, that's your drag name.

Yeah.

Weirdly, I was thinking about if a drag queen called me it.

Oh, right.

If I was friends with a drag queen, and she was like, hey, avocado baby rolls, I'll be really happy with it

every day.

Every day.

Yeah, I sat front row of a drag show when I was in Vegas, and they don't say things like avocado baby rolls.

They'd say some horrible stuff to you, mate.

Didn't you get destroyed at that show?

Or did you see someone else get destroyed?

No, I got destroyed.

You got destroyed, yeah, yeah.

It was amazing, though.

It was like noon, and everyone was hammered.

Hammered, it was noon, yeah.

It was a brunch, it was a drag brunch.

And a woman fell over, she was so drunk, and all her rings came off.

She hit the floor so hard, all her jewelry flew off.

Fantastic.

It was like Sonic the Hedgehog.

Mare laugh from Benito there.

Frank enough,

we always start with still or sparkling water.

Sparkling, yeah, Of course.

Yeah, yeah.

Of course.

Why is it so?

Of course.

I don't know.

I feel like I just like the little the little tingle it gives me.

To be honest, but half of my life though, I hated sparkling water.

And then I just woke up one day and it was...

it was only that.

Well, this is a part of you waking up and deciding exactly what you want to have.

Exactly.

I'm suddenly sparkling.

Yeah.

Someone programmes you in the night.

Honestly, that's what it feels like sometimes.

It's like so specific.

I always know exactly what I want.

So we've had singers on before and we've asked them about, I think sparkling water is quite a popular choice for singers as well.

Really?

And but then we always have to ask, obviously, you don't drink on on stage, right?

Because then you're burning.

Yeah, that's honestly one of my biggest fears.

Like sometimes I like feel it coming and I'm like, okay, you've got to, you've got to be ready for this, especially during a high note.

Because imagine that combination would be...

Yeah.

Wouldn't it be just burp?

I guess.

I feel like it would be.

I feel like it would match the tone somehow, maybe.

Imagine if it sounded so amazing that people were like, have you heard what Arlo's doing now?

The game missing item recreate every single time.

Every single time, you're just downing bottles of Pepsi Max at the same time.

There we go.

You want anything in the water?

You want some ice?

You want some uh fruit?

What's this new character?

Huh?

I like that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What was going on there?

I was waggling my fingers for the listener.

Yeah, but you also sort of went, you want you wanted to think of the water?

Yeah, like a gangster.

Yeah, yeah, I like that.

I know, I was gonna say, yeah, yeah.

I would say no ice, but I'd have a bit of lime.

A little bit of lime.

A wedge of slice?

What do you want?

A wedge.

A wedge, a wedge.

Yeah.

I don't like this guy.

No, you don't like him.

No, no, no, no.

He's upstairs as well, good.

Yeah.

Just ask people about what they want with their water.

Yeah, that's it.

He won't be here for any other courses.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

I won't bring him back.

But every episode we do now.

Yeah, okay, yeah.

Is it there just to ask people what they want in the water gangster?

Yeah, the water gangster.

So a slice.

Yes.

Rather than a wedge.

You're not, you don't want to.

You want to say a wedge?

No, I did say.

Yeah, I said a wedge.

Yeah, I said a wedge.

Sorry, I said water gangster.

So you can are you picking the wedge out and are you uh picking the wedge out or give it a little squeeze

i guess i guess i am

quite a good character from a different place yeah

so you would dip your you would dip it in and give it a little squeeze squeeze it i don't think i would i wouldn't dip it in i would just give it a squeeze from above no

my hands in it so

if it's bobbing about in the water the wedge of lime but you don't want it bobbing about in the water you want to be giving it separately yeah and then squeeze it in squeeze squeeze it in and and then that's it if you do get given a water and there's a wedge of lime bobbing about in it do you consider um fishing it out with your fingers and squeezing it in no no we never do it that's not that's not for me no not getting my hands in there is it is that you just fishing around in it but you've got four feet five fingers in there yeah

not my whole hand

i'd say

thumb and forefinger try to get try to get a lime that's bobbing about no if it was trapped under a bit of ice you've got to rescue it no i'm not a fan of ice either i don't have ice in anything so So, no ice chip.

It's a con, is it?

Yeah, I've said this on the podcast for a long time: that ice is a con.

Taking up real estate in the

uh in the glass, and it means you get less less of the actual drinks.

That's true.

I agree, it is a con.

Well, this is Ed's thing about Yorkshire puddings, yeah.

They take up your real estate as well.

Yorkshire puddings, they're the ice of the uh roast dinner.

The ice, I've always said that, I love.

He has always said that, actually.

The ice of the roast dinner is not even a joke.

I like that.

Publishing, poplobs or bed, Arlo Parks.

Publubs or bread.

Bread.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Any particular type?

For catcher.

I saw Jonathan Ross interviewing someone the other day, Prue Leaf, and asked her what her favourite type of bread was, and she said for catcher.

And he said, No, you just swear at me.

And it still makes me laugh now.

It's a dad joke.

Yeah.

But it was funny.

It made me laugh.

That was funny stuff.

No, you used that kind of language on the show.

Yeah.

It was funny.

For catcher's your favourite.

Yeah.

How do you want it?

You want it warm?

You want it with butter?

You want it.

Warm with like a bit of rosemary on top and like some, yeah, some salt and like black pepper.

You need that salt, the the big crystals

yeah i love it anything with huge crystals of salt to be honest i agree do you know what i can't get over that you were in school a few years ago because you seem more mature than me you're having rosemary on bread oh

that's the sign is it that's the sign of maturity

yeah well especially rosemary man i i bit i bit into a rosemary once when i was a kid well not on purpose i i swear to god

it was in there whatever my mum had made and i bit into it and and it made me very upset.

I didn't like how it made my mouth feel.

And I'm still not over it now.

Whenever there's rosemary on stuff, I've got to navigate around it.

James's mum is a terrible cook.

She's a very good cooker.

My mum makes wonderful food.

It was Angel Delight she'd made.

Stuck a big bit of rosemary in it.

Disgusting.

That's the dark truth.

My mum will get very, my mum is just heavy up.

I know what I was going to say.

She's listening.

She's listening.

She knows he's trolling her.

Yeah.

But she'll rise to it.

And I'm the one who gets the text.

She doesn't get the

So I'll get a lot of texts about how angry she is at Ed for spreading rumours about her so sorry he's a very naughty boy

who's the best chef you know the best if they're inviting you over and you're like the best chef I know

I'm trying to think of the best chef I know without offending anyone

there are a lot of people in my life who who claim to be right you know the best chef and you know my mum is a really good cook though yeah I think that's always the safest thing to go with right that is the safest thing you won't offend anyone and I was trying to think of like all the dinner parties i went i went through and i was like definitely have told all of my friends that they are the best chef i know so i need to i need to keep it together but yeah if it's your mum nervously go i listened to you on that podcast i thought i was the best chef you say your mum

said your mum

what's your mum's speciality what do you look forward to that your mum cooks oh what do i look forward to she does like a really nice spanish omelette that has yeah it's just like chopped onions tomato and she also does great fajita like great Mexican food as well.

Yeah, I know.

She'll definitely listen to this and be very pleased.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hello, Mama Parks.

Mama Parks, yeah, she'll have that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Little shout-out.

Popsicles, sprinklers, a cool breeze.

Talk about refreshing.

You know what else is refreshing this summer?

I'll brand new phone with Verizon.

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This is a deal for everyone, whether you're a new or existing customer.

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It's that time of year again, back to school season.

And Instacart knows that the only thing harder than getting back into the swing of things is getting all the back to school supplies, snacks, and essentials you need.

So here's your reminder to make your life a little easier this season.

Shop favorites from Staples, Best Buy, and Costco, all delivered through Instacart so that you can get some time back and do whatever it is that you need to get your life back on track.

Instacart, we're here.

What's your dream starter if we get into the meal proper?

Okay, I would say very simple, but I love like a tomato and burrata salad with a bit of basil.

Again, black pepper, olive oil, just keep it simple.

Is there a place where you've had that's like the best place the way you've been to and they make the best version of that there's a restaurant in la called sparanza that is really really good italian food and i love that and all the past is homemade i just love italian food it's just so like comforting yeah this feels really warm yeah i love it i've got i i think i like it what what but then i went well to say

here's my problem italian food in general or mate italian food what i like it one of the main foods i like

it is i do like it but like i've never like it's never my go-to.

What?

This is the reaction I always get.

So I always get this reaction.

Everyone's always like, who is this guy?

How does he talk to me about it?

Look, I love pasta.

I love Toritzo broccoli pasta.

So broccoli is the go-to.

That was very specific.

Yes.

Oh, he made it every day of lockdown.

Yes.

So, like, you know.

How dare you say you don't know if you like Italian food or not after doing The Wedge of Lime Guy?

My Wedge of Lime guy wasn't Italian.

Yes, he was.

He was.

Well, he had all the Italian rhythms.

He was London Gangster.

Yours was

you.

That was your focus.

You want Italian rhythm?

What do you want?

Some lime with that.

And you were like.

It was just the hand.

It was the fingers that were very unexpected.

Yeah, you did Italian hand.

Oh, I didn't know I did that.

I probably issue an apology.

Yeah.

That was my bad.

Well, here's the thing.

Everyone always, when I say this about Italian food, everyone's like, what the hell is the matter with you?

Correct.

I like it, but like, I've never gone nuts for it.

It's never my first choice.

And I went to Rome recently and I was like, here we go.

I'm going to finally get it.

I didn't get it.

You didn't get it.

I got the desserts.

I love the desserts from Trevi Fountain, near Trevi Fountain.

Not in the Trevi Fountain.

No, just you stood in the middle of the Trevi Fountain.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, this is a place nearby with really good desserts.

But what about like, you know, antipasty, all the cold meats,

none of that.

I don't think it gets to me.

What's your go-to then?

I'll probably go for Thai over that or Indian or Chinese or

Japanese.

A lot of European cuisines.

Like Italian?

No, no, no.

France and stuff.

I mean,

Sri Lankan, I'll go for France.

I'll always put Burata, which I think if you did a spreadsheet of all the best starter options.

I do love Burata, actually.

That would win out, surely.

Burata is delicious.

Torizo, broccoli pasta, and Burata.

Yeah, yeah.

Torizo broccoli pasta was invented by a man from Bristol.

Gloucester.

Gloucester, sorry.

Looked ahead there to see, because I don't know where Tom Kerry is from.

It's from Gloucester.

But yeah, but I mean, Burrata is delicious.

And I love a caprazy salad, is that Italian?

Yes.

Yes.

As you well know.

Yeah, I love it.

Burata is, that's a great choice because some people come and say mozzarella and tomato salad, which is fine.

But the burrata, it's a step up.

You've leveled up.

Did you used to like mozzarella more?

And then one day you woke up and you went, I prefer burrow.

Yes.

Yeah.

That's probably exactly what happened.

That is probably exactly what happened.

Again.

Eyes opened.

I'm a burrata person.

I like that.

First thought of the day.

Probably.

To be honest, probably.

Are you going with because sometimes you order a burata salad and they've already cut the burata up or like

drizzled it over and you're like, oh, I wanted the experience.

The experience of cutting it open and it just, yeah, blows out.

Definitely.

It's part of it.

I like to be in control, you know?

I love the burrow.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's a big part of it.

Where do you draw the line of the control, though?

Because you don't want to cook the whole meal.

No, but I want to be able to configure it how I want.

Yeah.

Like with the lime, I'll do the squeeze.

You'll do the squeeze.

So in the dream restaurant for your dream meal, are you going to be overseeing things in the kitchen as well?

No, no, no, no.

You don't want to be a supervisor?

I'm just there in the kitchen stood over them.

No, no, no.

You want the first bit done for you, but then...

The first bit done for me, and then the rest of it I can handle.

Is this why you're taking on more production duties with your albums now just to have that little you're sort of like squeezing the lime honestly yes yeah i want to be the one to to squeeze the lime

i was trying to extend that into an analogy about making an album but i've got absolutely no idea i did not have the vocabulary to do that you would make squeeze the lime yeah into a into a note

production choice

I don't need to squeeze the lime on this song.

Yeah.

Although we have no idea what you're talking about.

Well, let me squeeze the lime.

With the burata, I love cutting into the burata, delicately just releasing all the good stuff inside.

Do you ever imagine you're like a surgeon?

No, I can't say that I've thought about opening a body

when I eat burata.

Yes, because I've seen Edinburgh shout, we're losing him.

That's pretty disconcerting.

I bring one of those vacuum things.

Yeah, those little vacuum things.

He knows all the terms.

That's why it tends to be a surgeon.

I had loads of vacuum things on my face.

Yes, I had a facial for the first time.

What?

I had a facial.

I did it.

Went for it.

Really relaxing.

Loads of little vacuum things on my face I could feel and I had my eyes closed.

Yeah, and then you went out and got drunk.

Yeah, I got hammered after that.

Completely waste of time.

Biggest waste of money ever.

I was going to say, that is a waste of time.

Yeah, went and got a facial, really nice.

She was like, so you look after yourself.

I was like, yeah, yeah.

And then went to my friend's birthday party and got hammered.

And

then thought, oh, this is absolutely reversing all the good I've done this afternoon.

Why did they put vacuums on?

Have Have you ever had a facial the way they put vacuums on your face?

Not vacuums on my face.

I thought they were sucking my face.

I didn't see any of it.

I had my eyes closed.

Oh.

It could have been anything.

I feel like I fell asleep.

I've only had a facial once when I fell asleep.

It was really relaxing.

There were no vacuums involved.

Hydrofacial.

Oh, what's that?

I think it was just like they fill your face with water.

Oh, they fill it with water.

Yeah,

I think that's what it is.

I don't think that's what it was.

Oh, no.

I think that's what it was.

I don't think it was very...

I'd imagine they blast water at it, right?

Do they like blast water?

I don't think they must.

I think they were vacuums.

Are you sure?

Where did this happen?

They're like,

you're stumping ground.

Putney Bridge.

Yeah, yeah.

Under the bridge.

That's what I was thinking.

Just a load of lads went right.

Close your eyes.

It's going to feel like a vacuum.

They'll just start sucking on your face.

I look ten years younger.

It went well, I think.

Dream bank course.

So I went down the Mexican food route for that because I love Mexican food.

So I went for like some slow-cooked Carnitas tacos with guacamole, black beans, coriander,

and like pigo de gallo.

Yeah, I love Mexican food.

I spend a lot of time in Mexico.

Oh, do you?

Oh, okay.

Yeah, I do.

Has that always been a thing, or is it recent you see?

Just these past just these past few years.

I think it being so close to LA as well and like having a lot of friends who've like gone out there to make music to Mexico City.

But I went there with my friends in January.

It was really nice.

What did you get up to?

Honestly, just sitting on the beach, drinking margaritas, eating tacos, doing absolutely nothing.

Great.

And the guacamole, I'm told, so I've never been, hello, is the best.

That is like amazing.

It's like a completely different.

It's amazing.

It is.

I mean, they squeeze the lime into that.

Yes.

I like the lime theme.

Would you want to do that?

Would you want to squeeze the lime into the guacamole?

No,

I think I would allow them to do that.

Yeah.

Lose control of the lime.

Yeah.

If you're like, yeah, going to Mexico and being like, I'm like, excuse me.

Guys, I know you do this all the time, but I'll be scared.

I've got this.

I'm a lime squeezer.

No one knows it.

So would you want these tacos for your dream meal from Mexico or have you got a favourite place?

Because LA has very good Mexican food.

LA does.

They really do.

My favorite place probably in LA is this place called Guisardos.

I don't know if you guys have been been there.

Yes.

Yes, we have.

We've been there together.

Oh, then yes.

Yes.

Oh, is that where you took me and they refused to give us a certain one?

They refused to give me the spicy one?

Yes.

Why?

Oh, because I'm white as hell.

Oh,

one look at me and one, you don't want that.

No, look, you don't.

Okay, thank you.

Let me tell you, they did not disguise that reason at all.

They told him to his face.

I know.

To his white, white face.

We can handle our spice now.

Oh, yeah.

You and me.

We can go back to that place and tell them.

Yeah.

Give us the hottest one.

The hottest one.

Yeah, we could do do it now james and i filmed a video the other day where they made us eat the hottest uh tortilla chip in the world okay and it it did not go well what was it like it was the pain genuine pain yeah what'd they put in it like ghost yeah it's like ghost pepper

carolina reaper and it was blue so did we eat the whole thing yeah stupid we didn't ask and what is on this how hot is it We was like, yep, whole thing in one.

And then afterwards, googled it and we're like, oh, it's like half a million scovilles and there's all these different things on it and people have had heart attacks and and all sorts of shit after eating it like really horrific that must have destroyed your innards yeah yeah for a good day i mean james walked somewhere after that and i got a cab and it was that was a pretty hairy cab ride home and we're going every speed you're on the inner

i'm about to destroy my uber writing yeah

i can stop it at mcdonald's oh no

texting ed Ed from the throne,

telling him, I'm not leaving here until it's all out of my Ed.

I'm terrified.

You find out who you are when you eat something that spicy, though.

It's true.

I went so quiet and just, and James, the most aggressive I've ever seen him, he was like a

cornered hound.

I was screaming.

It was physically painful.

It felt like I was being stabbed in the tongue over and over again.

Like properly,

only when I had the milk in my mouth was like, oh, it stops for a second and as soon as you swallow the milk you're back to being attacked and it's like that for 10 minutes before it even starts to subside i was screaming i was kicking walls i was shouting at the crew yeah what's the spiciest thing you've ever eaten and what did it teach you about yourself i feel like it was probably my my grandma's soup because she just has this pepper soup and my grandma lives in nigeria and like the approach to spice is is quite intense there and i remember being like oh i can't really handle my spice so like don't make it spicy and she made this soup which was basically just water yeah and chilies and I had to like you know I had like most of it because I was like she made this delicious soup for me and it's honestly it was like the most unbearable my tongue was numb for like at least five days yeah see that completely when your grandma's made it as well you've got to eat it you've got to eat it did you say to her like yeah this is too much i can't

i was honestly my eyes were just watering she knew and she thought i think she thought it was because i loved it so much

I was like,

it's great.

She's crying.

She loves lunch.

These tacos.

So the Carnitas is pork, right?

Yes.

Really good stuff.

Guisados is like...

So just to describe it to people, it's more like a sort of, it feels like more of a cafe situation.

Yeah, it is.

They've got a couple in LA, but they make the tortillas fresh every morning.

And it's just like a nice little, like hole-in-the-wall spot.

My favorite one's the one in Echo Park.

And I go there, as I said i know what i have want to have every morning and mostly for lunch it'll be gasados at the studio i'm like known for it like ask anyone i work with they're like what does she have almost every day and it is a tacos will gestados so is that good if you're recording music i mean i guess you need to think especially if you're recording vocals actually you need to think about what you're eating for lunch i feel like i'm quite loose i'm quite loose with my lunch i'm just like this is what i want and that's just going to have to affect how i sound on this song

that's a fun challenge for people

I like that.

Taco take.

Yeah, yeah.

That was lovely.

This is definitely post-taco.

Your dream side dish.

My dream side dish.

Okay, I went for this one.

I went for like some Mexican street corn.

I think they call it like elote corn or something.

And it's just like they've got cheese on there.

They've got like coriander and they've got cremefresca and butter and it's just like a nice little side and they're quite spicy as well sometimes but i can i can handle little spicy bit of corn and it's that on the cob on the cob yeah never off

really is that never off it's eventually off though right yes unless you're cherry down the whole cob

it begins on yeah always but then you see to that yeah but i see to that yes um what's your call on the cob eating technique are you going round or across across across

are you going left to right and then rotating

or you're just going round round round and then you move oh to the to the and then you move round round round and then move round round round like a gradual spinning top yeah yes but uh side to side side to side

that's how but that's how they do it in cartoons right yes

well that is true that is how they do really big in cartoons even corner the cob actually

never really realized it before but it's just one of the things that happens i'd say more in cartoons than in real life.

There's a lot of people calling the cob.

I'm so glad someone's picked this because this is one of my favourite side dishes as well.

Yeah.

Because especially if it's been properly grilled, so there's like the little charred bits on it and then the creme fresco, like you said, and the little bit of cheese.

Yes.

And lime.

Yes.

And lime.

Squeeze your own lime as well.

Lime.

All the way through there.

You may as well just bring you a bag of limes at the beginning of this meal.

Yeah.

When I went to Disney World, I went to,

I've probably been there for quite a few days at this point, at least five days.

Five days.

Eating just Disney food.

Oh, that's too much.

Correct reaction, Arlo.

Thank you.

Very, very long time to be in Disney World, surviving off that food as well.

Yeah, but I was in goddamn Rome for eight days.

Boring.

At least you're in Disney World.

Couldn't get away fast enough.

They didn't do any shows in the Trevi Fountain.

Yeah, there's no, yeah, there's no...

No parade?

No parade.

Yeah, Mickey Mouse wasn't waving from the Trevi Fountain.

I would have loved that.

Big shame.

But when I went to Animal Kingdom in Disney, five days in, whatever, and got the corn on the cop there, the Harambe from the Harambe fruit market.

Harambe fruit market.

That's what it's called.

Named after that.

I think it was the gorilla.

It put up before the gorilla.

I was going to say.

I know the gorilla was a big deal.

What's the store?

Is the store called Cobs Out for Harambe?

Yeah,

it's not about the gorilla.

They're very clear about that.

There's no one in a big Harambe outfit waving.

That's why I'm going to take photos of other women.

Getting their little kids to

Yeah.

Like, look, I love that gorilla as much as the next person.

Like,

it weren't there.

Nothing to do with it.

I think the Disney people were like, well, it was already called it before that.

We're not going to change it.

Yeah.

You know, but they know everyone thinks about that gorilla when they go and get the corn on the cob.

But my point is, is that the corn on the cob was much needed because I had days of just eating junk.

So having some vegetables was very nice.

And it was very good corn on the cob.

And and everyone recommends it for a reason thank you very much that was a thank you thank you for that story that's a story I feel like the elote that Arlo is talking about is probably of a higher quality than the Disney World Corn on the Cob from Harambe's fruit market

I'm the only one who can speak on that

Benito you had the Harambe fruit market call on the Cob?

Benito's had it.

He loves it.

Yeah.

He loves it.

Benito's vegetarian and he loves Disney.

Yeah, yeah.

So he went, I mean, Benito would gladly spend a month in Disney.

Really?

Two weeks is crazy as well.

I did one day.

Yeah.

That was way too much for me.

In Florida?

No, in the one in just outside of LA.

I did not enjoy that.

How long is one day though?

Because I went with my wife and she likes Disney.

From the beginning of the day, like from when the gates open to when the gates close.

Yeah, that's a long day.

It was a long day eating that food.

All those turkey legs everywhere.

It's a really traumatic experience for me.

you see I love the turkey leg at Disney oh no it's so artificially moist I love it you just bite into it and it's just like a pint

a pint of salty just turkey water

delicious so just one massive corn on the cop yes have you ever had corn ribs before we move on I have I actually made them yeah into she made them

it was really hard to cut them yeah it was so hard almost chopped my hand off because I because I put it in and I was just banging it on the thing that's what it was is that what we're supposed to do I don't know I just put it stuck it in and was just banging it around my kitchen were you just like using the impact of banging it down to try and chop it in half so the knife could have just come out yeah yeah

i don't think you're supposed to do it like that okay

i watched a tutorial and that's what the guy was doing

yeah did that guy also had a very stress yeah i was gonna say he maybe it did have one hand

yes yeah that's the that's the hardest one yotam otalenghi came on the podcast and he was saying cutting corn long is the hardest and then i got some texts from some friends after the episode, all saying that they'd try to cut corn long and it and it brought back

memories.

Listen to the pod.

Man, my stories are not great today.

Even I don't like them.

Normally, Benito gets annoyed at me because all my stories are boring, but even I'm getting

your friends not being able to cut corn long is, I'd say, a real nadir.

Your dream drink, Arlo Parks.

My dream drink.

I feel like I would just go for like fresh orange juice.

Yeah.

That's it.

Now, have you had one from the machine that looks like a contraption?

What?

Our brains are now just work the same because I was like, James is going to bring up the machine.

Because the contraption is...

It's pretty cool.

Have you seen those machines?

It's like...

What, the one where it's...

Yeah, they were the one.

The one where it's got the orange like cup things.

Like Wallace and Grommet machine.

Yes.

Yeah.

I used to be terrified of that.

What?

Wallace and Grommet.

Yeah.

Why?

The one where it's like the baker who like is a murderer.

Do you know which one I'm talking about?

The film?

I've been trying to remember the baker who's a murderer.

There was a baker murderer.

I have like a very specific list of films that traumatised me and it was the one about the baker murderer.

Wallace and Grommet.

Yeah, that one really.

So was it the baker specifically that upset you, not Wallace and Grommet themselves?

The heroes of the piece?

Yeah, I just associate them all now with fear and terror.

So you would still be scared if Wallace and Grommet walked in here now, you'd be scared.

I wouldn't, yeah, I wouldn't be happy.

So you wouldn't be like, oh, good, it's the good guys, you know?

fuck off I know yeah

yeah you'd be very scared of that

what would scare you more Wallace and Grommet like as they are when they film them like little plastic models or them the size that they should be in real life human size definitely human size

definitely scarier it is very much scarier yes and and he's a wanker because he likes cheese doesn't he Wallace yes he's just always eating cheese all the time which makes him a knob head no it doesn't there's a lot of cheese on our lives menu doesn't There is a lot of cheese.

I'm a real cheese boy so and James.

Can you not have cheese?

I can have it, yeah, sure.

But

I'm not having it for dessert.

Put it that way, Arlo.

Whenever someone uses a cheese board for dessert, I go through the roof.

Really?

Yeah, yeah, I go through the roof, man.

If I met Wallace and got it, I'd beat up Wallace.

I'd beat him up.

Well, what do you reckon?

Do you reckon James could take Wallace or Wallace would absolutely destroy him?

Being honest.

He would destroy you.

He wouldn't destroy it.

He's a dork.

He waves a tank tank top and talks to his dog.

If he's got a little like feral vibe to him, I feel like he'd bite you or something.

This is because you're scared of him, though.

That is true.

I am

someone who has like a deep-rooted fear of wanting to vomit.

I am really scared.

That and the woman from Chicken Rums.

Same animation.

The pie lady.

The woman who...

Yeah, she was the chopping one.

Yeah, that was scary.

So it's something about Aardman animations that scares you.

It is.

You ever watch Creature Comforts?

No.

Or Flushed Away?

That one's alright.

With the singing toads or something?

I haven't seen it.

Yeah, Flushed Away.

A rat gets flushed on toilet.

Yeah, that's the film.

Yeah.

Sean the Sheep's Farm again?

No, I can't say I've seen that one.

Could you ever watch it, do you think?

Maybe.

If I said to you, we're going to watch Sean the Sheep's Farm again after this.

Do you think you'd be able to watch it?

I think so.

Don't know if I'd want to, but I could.

You could.

Theoretically.

Well, you can see there's a chance you would get scared.

Yes.

Because they might have a character in it who's similar to one of those.

The baker who kills people and the farmer's wife.

Arla's got quite a lot on her.

So

I feel like Arla's got quite a lot on.

So I think she probably couldn't call up her next interview and say, I'm going to be late.

I'm watching Chaun the Sheep's Farm again and see if I'm scared.

To see if I'm scared is the best part of that.

It's a good experiment.

Yeah, you've had a lot of cheese on your menu so far, and I respect it because we've had cheese for the starter, obviously.

Was there cheese on the taco?

No.

No, but there is cheese on the

corn.

Lovely.

No cheese in the orange juice, though.

No.

We're going pure.

We're going pure oj orange juice yes are there other types i'm gonna ask you to rank the juices now well all of them no

never look never seen someone look so devastated at the suggestion of a question no oh my god let's do top five or top top five juices top five or even top three if that's easier okay you've got orange that's orange you've got orange number one the and i would say you know that's the original juice Peach?

Peach.

Peach?

Where are you getting peach juice?

I don't think I've ever had a peach juice.

Peach juice is really nice.

I bet it is.

I love peaches, man.

Peach juice.

And then just apple juice.

Easy.

Apple and ginger, specifically.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm not into the vegetable juices.

No.

Tomato juice is at the end of that very long list.

Really?

Very bottom.

Not even in a Bloody Mary.

No, I can't understand it.

Because it's a bit like cold soup, right?

Yes.

Yes, exactly why.

It's a bit cold soupy.

I love that.

You love cold soup.

Well, I i love tomato juice i love bloody marys i like imagining it as cold soup i love gazpacho

for example i love gazpacho actually i hate all of those things yeah yeah they all like the bottom of the arlo parks rankings for juice what would you do if you turned on the tv and uh it was wallace in a new film and he was eating gaspacho

good question i'd hide

what about that what if you like woke up in the night and there's a figure at the end of your bedding makeup

and then you realize it's wallace he's eating gaspacho Gaspatcho.

And he goes, More Gaspatcho, Super Paulo?

Are you?

Would you

run out of the room?

I would never sleep again.

I would never sleep again.

I can see why you'd be scared of it.

You went to you went there recently, didn't you?

Went to Ardmann to Ardmann Animations, yeah, to film something at Aardman.

Very nice people.

They've um, I said, How do you write your films?

And they said, We create whatever we think Arlo Parks might be scared of.

Yeah, that's how that works.

That would make sense.

Yeah, on the

big red cross.

Yeah, I

Great Benito was quite rightly and in quite an angry tone

that he wants to watch.

But I think, yeah, the question Great Benito wants to ask is, does the orange juice have bits in it?

But I'm guessing if it's fresh.

Yeah, because it's fresh.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Stupid question, Benito.

Yeah.

It has to have bits in it.

And we already know that Arlo's not going to...

dip in and take all the bits out herself with her hands.

No.

That's insane.

That would be an insane thing thing to do.

So hold on.

We've talked all the way through this podcast about you squeezing the lime.

Are you squeezing the orange?

Are you making would you want to do that?

No, I think.

Have you ever tried to make your own orange?

I have, and it takes ages.

It takes so many oranges to make one glass.

So I usually, yeah.

Yeah.

Also, if you live in LA and in California,

is it to do with the weather as well?

If you're sipping a fresh orange juice in LA, that must taste better than sipping a fresh orange juice in England.

Definitely.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

It's got to be in the sun.

So your dream restaurant scenario, we haven't even talked about where you are.

Where it is.

I feel like either it would be in like a vineyard in the south of France and you just like have a cool breeze, the sun's shining, you've just got this view of nature, or it would be by the sea, like a little like coastal, coastal moment.

I think that would be really nice.

Sounds very peaceful.

Yeah.

I mean, if you're in a vineyard and then they said, what do you want to drink?

And I said, orange, fresh orange juice, please.

Yeah, absolutely.

That's very me, though.

I'm just like, I'm sorry.

I just, this is what I want and this is what we're having.

I mean,

they'd be upset.

All the grapes would be shaking on the vine.

Yeah.

I'll have orange wine, though.

I'm into orange wine, a little natural wine.

If I was in a vineyard, I would.

I would.

Would you stop the grapes yourself?

Would you stomp them?

No.

No, it's the same question as would you dip your...

If Arlo's not dipping her fingers in to get a bit of lime, she's not stomping the grapes.

Well, listen, last time I checked, we do a podcast where we ask the same question 50 times.

So

I don't know what you want from me.

It's worked so far.

I'd stomp the grapes.

You would?

Yeah, but I wouldn't then drink it.

No way.

I was going to say.

But I'd stomp it for someone else.

But I think there's an extra process after people stomp the grapes.

They're just stomping and just pouring into it.

I think it's just straight into the...

into the bottle.

Straight into the bottle, is it?

Yeah, yeah.

They drag the bottle through it.

Yeah.

They just hack it through it.

And then that's it.

That picks up.

There you go.

This is is stopped by James Akas.

Some people are drinking that.

Yeah, yeah, there's some weird pigment out there.

Popsicles, sprinklers, a cool breeze.

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Dream dessert.

My dream dessert, I went with just pumpkin pie with vanilla ice cream.

Pumpkin pie, I know it's something that people, I mean American people mainly have at Thanksgiving, but I have it all year long.

From House of Pies.

From House of Pies?

There's this place called House of Pies where you can get pies till like 3 a.m that's after a night out i have a little bit of pie and it actually

is a hack yeah it's so good yeah that's what we're missing in this country yeah like good late night food

house of pies at 3am i don't have pancakes they've got like milkshakes you know whatever you want and they've got like it's weird they've got like breakfast stuff as well so at 2 a.m you can just get some scrambled eggs in i don't i don't even like going out that much i'd set my alarm for 2 a.m wake up and go and get a pie yeah i've got a house of pie do they do cherry pie yeah they do like they have like 55 different pies also

like i'll do i'll schedule a delivery for when i know i'm going to get home and there's a pie at my doorstep great that's that's that's brilliant that's a satisfying feeling yeah it is do you ever i've been in a situation and this is probably one of the most tense things in the world

when i'm like in a in a car home yeah

and it's smooth sailing.

So I go and deliver.

Yeah, okay, this is gonna get there same time as me great as soon as soon as i've paid for it and it's locked in traffic jam and then i'm like oh

oh no oh my mother of god like i don't know if i'm gonna get my deliveroo now the guy's gonna ring me being like where are you

why don't you just leave out and say leave at door oh no i can't do it because i i live in a i live in a bit there's like a they have to buzz to get through to another james lives in a gated community ah yes

can't leave it at the gate

why not Because then some

like urchins will steal it.

Some urchins.

Straight away.

Immediately.

Oh, that'll be a good idea.

You have no idea.

My area.

Also, swipe it.

It's just the worst.

You never had that?

You've never been...

They're leaving it on your doorstep for you.

Yeah.

And no one's nicking them?

No.

No urchins waiting for you?

No urchins.

That's a good life.

That's a good life.

Yeah, yeah.

Especially for the pie place.

I mean,

we've told this on the podcast before, and it's another story that doesn't go anywhere.

But, like, you know, when we were in New York, Ed and I, we walked ages to go to this pie place, and then it was shut.

But, like, all we could think about was how much we wanted some of that sweet American pie.

Not like the film.

We weren't doing that.

I was going to say,

that's what I was thinking.

We weren't doing that with the pie.

Protting across New York.

He couldn't wait to get to that sweet American pie.

I thought it was a cultural tradition there.

i got chucked out the shop pretty quickly

get out of here that film man

what a film we had to talk about that with brett goldstein recently he asked he asked us what the uh most brett goldstein does a film podcast so we did a mashup for comic relief with with uh the food podcast he asked us uh

what's what what's the most arousing meal meal in a film is and i said

what he fucks the pun

i might have said it yeah Yeah.

I think it was mad because I was 13 years old and watching

a sex film.

But it wasn't pie, though.

Even when

you weren't 13, going, oh,

that's sex.

As far as I know with that, I don't have a clue.

I probably know what to do with a pie more than a person.

James grew up in Kettering, so the only apple pie he could lay his hand on was McDonald's one, and he really burnt himself.

Boiling hot.

The kingdom come.

My money's just getting better now.

Pumpkin pie, though.

Great.

You can't get it here, I don't think, really.

Not really.

Yeah, not of the right kind of quality level.

You ever get the tinned, the mix, the pumpkin pie, like in a tin?

You ever use that mix?

You look disgusted, actually.

Sorry, I bought it up.

Sorry, a very expressive face.

As soon as you see something, I'm like, does that give you away ever if you're not?

A lot, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I really struggle to like keep it in.

In a good way and in a bad way.

Like when I like love food, I always do like a little like

little

yeah and then when I don't I'm like

got your songs about food you written I feel like I've mentioned food quite a lot actually in my songs yeah I just like like sensory writing I'll write about food and smells and flowers and stuff yeah trying to think what the best song about food is and now all I can think of is the song American Pie yeah because we mentioned it earlier and that's about very different subject matter than the film actually fast food rockers fast food rockers yeah what's What's that?

I don't even know what that is.

What's that song called?

Look it up.

I'm mainly imagining if

the song American Pie was the same tune and stuff that was about the subject matter from the film American Pie.

It would be

how well the song would have done if it was just

fucking a pie.

Fast food song.

What's that?

Yeah.

McDonald's, McDonald's, can take a fried chicken and a pizza.

What is that?

Oh, sorry.

I forgot.

You were at school probably when it came out.

Yeah, yeah.

Like that.

I mean, to be fair, that's my well.

We really showed our

oh classic of which genre fast food fast food rock yeah this is this is this is the most embarrassing

we've ever thing we've ever done on this podcast um is that we've got to now explain to you how i feel this is the oldest i've ever felt

when we were in school and and i we didn't have phones or anything and uh we would walk around singing um uh pizza hurt uh pizza hurt good ducky fire chicken hit a pizza

you would sing that why

I don't know.

It had little actions with it.

Yeah.

And it was just all the fast food chains that there were at the time.

Obviously, now there's a lot more.

It would go on for ages, that song.

But it was such a popular song that a dance troupe, like a pop music, European pop music combo, did a version of it.

that was like sounded like it should be in eurovision oh but using face is giving you away again i'm very confused using those lyrics and the lyrics are just a pizza hut, a pizza hut, Kentucky Fied Chicken and a Pizza Hut.

Yeah, so you would go, a pizza hut was you would draw a hut, like a little house with your hands.

A pizza hut, a pizza hut.

Kentucky fied chicken is the flap them up like little chicken wings

and a pizza hut.

And then McDonald's, you would do like the archers of McDonald's.

McDonald's, McDonald's, and then Kentucky Fied Chicken and a Pizza Hut.

And it was as that.

Over and over again.

Over and over again.

And that is the whole song.

That was what?

That was fun.

That was what we did for fun back then.

Yeah.

Yeah.

In our day.

Right.

That was how we had fun.

We sang that.

I prefer it.

I preferred that.

Hate to be sad.

Those were the good old days where you had to use your imagination to have fun.

Yeah, rather than all this vaping and nudes.

Yeah,

that was about all we ever did.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Was that.

So I don't know if you're doing any covers on your next tour, but you should consider doing the

first food tour.

It'll be a very, very brief cover.

Arlo, can I ask you a favour?

Okay.

Can you not tell anyone about us

after this podcast?

Don't tell anyone who wasn't here about what we're like.

James is worried because James is about to release an album and he's worried that it's going to get out in the music industry about what a sad loser he is.

Yeah, I've got to be cool.

They've all got to think I'm cool in the music industry.

Yeah.

And this is not going to help me.

Right.

I'm going to read your menu back to you now, see how you feel about it.

Okay.

You would like sparkling water with a wedge of lime that you you will squeeze into it yourself.

No ice.

Pop on the bed.

You want warm for ketchup with roast meat, salt and black pepper.

Starter, tomato and burrata salad with basil, olive oil, salt and pepper from Speranza in LA.

Main course, slow-cooked Canitas tacos with guacamole, black beans and picadagallo.

Oh, and when was that again the main the tacos from?

Guisados.

Gazados.

Yeah.

Side dish.

The Mexican street corn.

Elotes, as it says?

It says here?

Yeah.

Drink.

Fresh orange juice.

May or may not be made in the contraption dessert a pumpkin pie with vanilla ice cream from house of pies ed are you micing up your stomach i was micing up my stomach just to show how much i in i enjoyed that menu with respect because i'm hungry and then every time you mention you i also am hungry and i also think your voice saw it wrongly and i'm i'm scared that he can hear it well i i tried to mic it up but of course as soon as the mic got on it it was like no way i don't perform don't perform for you can't get ed in the studio that that is that is a fantastic menu thank you you've transported me to California and Mexico as well.

I think it's perfect stuff.

Yes, delicious.

And apologies for our input.

Just generally, just generally.

Can't apologise enough.

Yeah, it's your dream meal.

We don't need to be there at the dream meal.

Yeah, just so you know, you don't have to part with this shit.

We're not

in the vineyard.

You can't hear us in the vineyard.

Well, Bonito's downloading Pharmageddon now.

What?

And we're going to watch it.

We're all going to watch it together.

Ed fell for that.

I can't believe I actually tricked him.

I'm very hungry.

I've lost my mind today.

That's how boring I've been on the podcast this episode.

It's like, can't be a joke.

Benito's actually downloading Shore the Sheep's Farm again.

Arlo, thank you so much for coming to the Dream Restaurant.

Thanks for having me.

Thank you, Arlo.

Sorry.

Well, there we are, James.

Delicious.

Great menu from Arlo Parks there.

Very tasty, very simple menu.

That's what that's, I mean,

those are the ones that transport you the most sometimes transportative you were in la weren't you you were in sunny la i was in la but i was in la and i wasn't really annoyed that i was in la yeah like i normally am yeah yeah yeah just go oh god

how are these people not wearing shorts i'm gonna have to wear shorts and i look like a complete moron like that it's your main concern yeah that's a big concern is that no one else is wearing shorts and you're wearing shorts it's warm outside but they're never outside they're always in their car or in an air-conditioned office whereas i like to have a little stroll around so i have to wear my little shorts and then I'll you know nip into some high-flying entertainment office yeah and I look like I'm on a tour yeah because it's freezing isn't it I mean their air con as well it should be pointed out is freezing yes it's like a walk-in freezer yeah yeah it's not like oh okay that's a bit nicer than outside it is like oh it's it's freezing and if I dress for hot outside I come in here yeah and now I'm freezing and part of the whole

The whole thing in LA is you've got to like be all brush and overly confident about what you do because otherwise they don't think you're any good at all.

And it's very difficult to be brush and overconfident when you're the only person in an office wearing shorts, your dick's all shriveled up because of the air conditioning.

It is hard to be confident in your dick short.

Do you see that shrimp dick UK comedian coming?

And Gamble.

Stupid little fucking knees and dick.

Love it.

Love that voice.

Yes.

Love that voice.

Love the voice every time.

Yeah.

It's a real.

But would you consider going into the meeting and speaking in that voice?

Yeah.

Yeah.

That would make me more confident actually yeah that'd be much better yeah what's up hey guys i've flown all the way from london i got a shrimp dick make a show out of it out of it now imagine if i'd asked you good name for a sitcom that huh good name for a sitcom yeah what shrimp dick shrimp dick from london yeah

thank you also to arlo for not saying Cola.

Didn't say cola, which would have been.

It was a soft drink, though.

We went with

orange, je d'orange.

yeah so no but no booze no if i may yes oh you may mercy you always may mercy

um

so yeah i mean yeah i don't know is that it's the first time we've had fresh orange juice as the as no i don't think so we've definitely had fresh orange juice before i think

well it's very i mean you know yeah because we've probably asked about the contraption before yeah of course we've definitely asked about the contraption before Richard D.

Grant shows that, because he wanted to be squeezed until there was pipsqueak.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So of course he wanted to.

Oh, we should remember to ask when anybody yeah picks fresh orange juice do you want to be squeezed until your pips squeak yeah we should have asked her that but she definitely doesn't because that would be like being in a wallace and grommet machine wouldn't it yeah that would be terrifying absolutely terrifying for her terrified of it but i'll tell you what kind of machine she's not scared of a soft machine a soft machine maybe that's what she's talking about oh god yeah how do we miss that she's talking about the orange juice machine yeah maybe because all the wallace and grommet stuff is obviously made of plasticine yeah so they're all the machines in one of the grommet are soft machines yeah so maybe it's about her fear of the contractions in one grommet or her love of orange juice oh this is either way we didn't ask the question even though we didn't ask it's too late now yeah my soft machine is coming out on transgressive records on friday 26th of may go get it and arlo's gone on tour in september dublin london europe Go and get tickets.

Thank you very much for listening.

We will see you again next week.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

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Hello, I'm Carrie Add.

I'm Sarah.

And we are the Weirdos Book Club podcast.

We are doing a very special live show as part of the London Podcast Festival.

The date is Thursday, 11th of September.

The time is 7pm.

And our special guest is the brilliant Alan Davies.

Tickets from kingsplace.co.uk.

Single ladies is coming to London.

True on Saturday, the 13th of September.

At the London Podcast Festival.

The rumours are true.

Saturday, the 13th of September, at King's Place.

Oh, that sounds like a date to me, Harriet.