Ep 89: Anne-Marie

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Speaker 1 How do you like your podcasts? Scrambled, fried, poached, or off-menu?

Speaker 1 It's the Off-Menu Podcast with Ed Gamble and James Acaster. Hello, James.
Hello, Ed.

Speaker 1 How are you doing, buddy? Oh, much better after that lovely intro. It was very good.
You're playing around with the theme of eggs because you've always got to think, haven't you?

Speaker 1 You've got to think for a different intro. And for this one, I think you were like, oh, what food intro could I do?

Speaker 1 And then you looked at the screen here, where is me, you, and Benito, and we all have our different names. And you always just put as your name, egg, don't you? You always put that.

Speaker 1 And it says egg in the bottom left-hand corner of your screen there yeah and you just looked at that and you went that's what i'm riffing on that's what i think happened am i right turns out i will now riff on the one word that i can see in front of me egg that's how blunted my comic uh sense has become over the course of this global pandemic uh which we're still in if you're listening to this in the future and we're out of it thank Thank the Lord.

Speaker 1 But that's why this episode is recorded on Zoom, of course, James. Yes, a lovely Zoom episode.

Speaker 1 And we're going to ask a guest over Zoom, their favorite ever starter main course, dessert, side dish, and drink. And this week's guest is

Speaker 1 Marie. Anne-Marie, brilliant musician.
She's got a new single out, James, with KSI and Digital Farm Animals called Don't Play. Oh, very exciting.
Very exciting. I love a new single.
And she's also

Speaker 1 a judge. She's also a judge.
I forgot the word for judge there.

Speaker 1 James, could you change your name to Judge so I remember it? Yes, I will. Sorry, I'll change it on the screen here so you can riff on it.

Speaker 1 She's a judge on The Voice, of course, the show where they sit in chairs and spin round if they like it.

Speaker 1 Here's the thing, Ed, that maybe I haven't told you about me, or maybe I have, and I've forgotten. You're on the series of The Voice.
Yes, that's right.

Speaker 1 No, I like to watch The Voice Blind auditions on YouTube. It makes me emotional.
James, you have told me that before because I know all of those things about you.

Speaker 1 Because you're a very sensitive little boy. Yes.
And you do all of those things and then it worries you that you do them.

Speaker 1 So you feel like you need to tell other people that you do them so they can go, don't worry, man, you're not crazy.

Speaker 1 I'm not too worried. Yeah, you should be, you fucking weirdo.
Oh, man, oh, no.

Speaker 1 Maybe I'll get a chance to pitch my new food-based twist on the voice to Anne-Marie called the smell.

Speaker 1 where the judges are in their normal positions and then someone brings out a hot dish of food they've just cooked.

Speaker 1 And if the judges like the the smell they spin around and they can see what the food is ed that sounds like a great idea thank you very much i would love that show unfortunately if anne-marie says a secret ingredient which we all now say she will be removed from the restaurant james and the secret ingredient this week is ribena toothkind it's ribena toothkind apparently according to the great benito Dynamo brought it up in his episode and we said we should put that on the list and now it's on the list.

Speaker 1 So this is actually

Speaker 1 a Dynamo secret ingredient. So, I don't like Ribena full stop.
Nah, not really into it. Don't care for it, but Ribena Toothkind, especially, can get out of town.

Speaker 1 Yes, so if Anne Marie says Ribena Toothkind, I can't think why she would. Uh, we will kick her out of the restaurant.

Speaker 1 Sorry, sorry, Anne-Marie, but she's arriving now, so we better go and prepare the restaurant. Uh, here is the off-menu menu of Anne Marie.

Speaker 1 Welcome. And oh,

Speaker 1 are you saying bye to Benito, James? You've never done that before. Well, I just think it's rude.
We always just let him sliver off into the night before a podcast recorded.

Speaker 1 I thought I'd say goodbye to him. Well, I was welcoming our guests, but I know that this is going to have to be in the beginning of the podcast now because

Speaker 1 this is the worst start we've ever had. I just thought you might, I mean, maybe, you know, not blame me for that.

Speaker 1 And why didn't you say goodbye to Benito as well before we started the podcast i just think this is supposed to be a dream restaurant imagine if you went to a restaurant and uh the waiter at the door stopped saying welcome to you so you could say goodbye to the chef who was sort of slinking back into the kitchen yeah then fair enough and i'd say goodbye to the chef also as the i'd feel what a nice restaurant what a nice everyone's nice to each other

Speaker 1 big one big happy family but what i wouldn't like if i was a guest is if i arrived and there were two people greeting me at the door and one of them started saying hello and the other one said oh see you later chef and the other one was like what you're saying goodbye to the the chef for?

Speaker 1 And I'll be like, What the hell? This isn't this is not good. Let's stop bickering because now we do have to welcome our guests.
Welcome, Anne-Marie, to the dream restaurant. Hello,

Speaker 1 welcome, Anne-Marie, to the dream restaurant. We've been expecting you for some time.
Now, obviously, uh, we're in the midst of a global pandemic, so none of us are eating out very much.

Speaker 1 Um, but in normal times, are you eating out a lot? Do you go to a lot of restaurants?

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 14 I've tried to cook more this time because

Speaker 14 eating out means you have to be around strangers uh-huh so I stay home yeah they're strangers are a bit weird what are the things that scare you the most about strangers um they say stuff that you're not prepared for like you know when you're with your friends you kind of know what they're like so you know what's you kind of can work out what will come out their mouth but with strangers it's a bit scary of that and their eyeballs are quite scary

Speaker 1 uh-huh what what how would you describe strangers eyeballs quite rounded yeah and stary but surely when you so your friends the first time you met them they were strangers right

Speaker 1 so yeah did their eyeballs then change

Speaker 14 Yeah, they became a bit smaller. Yeah.

Speaker 14 Not in size, but in width or height.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 14 Yeah, less intense.

Speaker 1 That got easier. And they started asking you questions that you were ready for and that you were.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm interested in this eyes thing. Do you think it's because you're famous? So people are like, oh my god, it's Anne-Marie.
And their eyes go all wide. Or do you think it's like a scientific thing?

Speaker 1 Yeah, before you were famous, did you notice that strangers had big round eyes?

Speaker 14 To be honest, yeah, I've always been very hyper-aware of every single thing.

Speaker 14 And nowadays, if I i were to go out i do wear a big hat and glasses and a mask and a coat and then my friends say that makes you more people want to look at you more yeah so i i don't know what to do i've got pink hair as well what how big is this hat

Speaker 14 very big hat so i get it i'm gonna get my hat go and get the hat

Speaker 1 Oh, I'll reveal the most terrifying cushion I have ever seen in my life. Yeah.
I did not know that. Anne-Marie was sitting in front of her sofa, so we didn't see this cushion as she's just moved.

Speaker 1 And the cushion has

Speaker 1 a human face printed onto it that looks like kind of how actually

Speaker 1 kind of the opposite of how you've described strangers because it's like got no eyes whatsoever. This cushion.
Oh, now, okay. Oh, now you've moved it.
It's a baby. It's a photo of a real baby.

Speaker 14 All right, these are my hats.

Speaker 1 Okay, here's the hats.

Speaker 1 Big fluffy black hat. Big fluffy hat.
Big fluffy green hat. The same one in green.

Speaker 1 The same one in pink leopard. Fluffy leopard pink hat.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I would say in order of, in ascending order of conspicuousness, like there's no way you'd wear that pink leopard one out and go, oh, I'm trying to stop people looking at me.

Speaker 1 Especially as you're covering pink hair with a pink hat with leopard spots on it. You've upped your game there, if anything.

Speaker 14 That's my nephew.

Speaker 1 It's a nephew on the cushion. Oh, yeah, we probably should have asked.
It was the way the cushion was arranged when you got up that

Speaker 1 made your nephew look like an inhuman monster but now I'm seeing him he's actually very smart.

Speaker 1 Very cute.

Speaker 1 Here's a question for you. Were you so enamoured with your nephew that you got your nephew's face printed onto a cushion or was that given to you and you had no choice?

Speaker 14 That was a gift from my sister

Speaker 14 so his mum.

Speaker 1 Yes. Did she give those to everyone? I think maybe.

Speaker 14 She's a new mum. She hasn't got time to think about presents.
So she just got everyone a cushion with his face on it.

Speaker 1 How do you feel about it?

Speaker 14 I feel fine, yeah. I like it, but I do forget about it.
And then I do zooms and it scares the shit out of people.

Speaker 1 We always start here with still or sparkling water, Anne-Marie. As every meal starts.

Speaker 14 I go still.

Speaker 14 Because sparkling tastes very sour.

Speaker 1 Oh. Have we had that reason before? I don't think we've ever had the sour reason before.
I was expecting a bubble's reason. I thought you were going to say it's a strange water.

Speaker 1 And when you see it, the bubbles are very wide. And

Speaker 1 they stare at you and they get smaller as you get to know them

Speaker 1 that's true though that's that's what it's about no it's just the taste of it it's very sour don't you think do you like any sour flavors or

Speaker 1 no

Speaker 1 sweet all the way sweet yeah i mean i've never heard anyone say that sparkling water tastes sour do you not think it does No you think about it now.

Speaker 14 If you think about tasting it now,

Speaker 14 does it taste sour? Tastes fizzy to me. That's not a flavour.

Speaker 1 No, that's true.

Speaker 1 It's not a flavour at all. Yeah, absolutely.
That's why I get thrown out of all those professional champagne tastings. Because it's

Speaker 1 bringing fizzy through. I'm getting a lot of fizzy on the palate.
I can't imagine it tasting sour, to be honest, but I'm imagining it now.

Speaker 1 And I can imagine it tasting sour, but I do have to replace the actual taste of it with the sour. I just have to imagine it wrong.

Speaker 14 Yes. Right, so that's not right then.

Speaker 1 No, I'm not doing that.

Speaker 1 What you got in all those those multicoloured drawers behind you?

Speaker 14 Oh, loads of different things really. I bought them because I started drawing art and I've and I wanted to put my different coloured pens in there.

Speaker 14 And then it became my flat was too small and I just used them now to put rubbish in. Not actual rubbish, but like

Speaker 14 bits and bobs. So

Speaker 14 the top has got all now all nail stuff. The bot the red one has ar face masks, like actual face masks, not like that those ones, like actual

Speaker 1 relaxing ones. Yeah, relaxing ones, not pandemic ones, yeah.

Speaker 14 Those three are pretty much pens. And then I've got some COVID rapid tests

Speaker 14 in that one.

Speaker 1 Lovely.

Speaker 14 And then some makeup, I think.

Speaker 1 Everything you need, really. Now, if you have to move in a hurry, you can just take that and know you'll probably be alright.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 What art were you drawing?

Speaker 14 Well, at the beginning of the lockdown, when it all started, I'd started writing down quotes that made me feel better because not that that's art really I just I realized that I get so influenced by words that I see so I started drawing quotes writing quotes yeah and then it became a thing and then on the zoom calls that I was doing with all my friends where we were doing quizzes and bingo and all of that stuff the prize became my artwork and then i then i had to do it and it was quite stressful.

Speaker 14 But then it became a thing, and now I do it all the time. So I draw all the time.

Speaker 1 I would very much like to see some of your quotes that you've drawn.

Speaker 14 I can show you.

Speaker 1 Alone with the baby again. The baby's in a better position now.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Nobody asked for your opinion. Now, that is not the kind of quote.
I'll be honest. I'll just imagine it.
Yeah, Anne-Marie, I was not expecting that.

Speaker 1 I was expecting some sort of uplifting, feel-good quote, maybe, because everyone's struggling a bit. But you've gone with nobody asked for your opinion

Speaker 1 with a lovely drawing of a daisy in there is that right yeah yeah that's taken me by surprise i like it a lot more than what i was expecting it to be thank you yeah i thought it's gonna be shoot for the moon even if you're missed you'll end up among the stars or something because it says no nobody asks for your opinion shut your face no i'm into that i'd i'd totally hang one of those maybe just uh could i commission a uh a fuck off your eyes are too wide what yes

Speaker 1 uh i'm trying to think what i would like

Speaker 1 i mean i guess i'd i'd like like something that's very anti-cheese board or something.

Speaker 1 James doesn't like cheese.

Speaker 14 You don't like cheese at all?

Speaker 1 I like cheese, but I don't like it in place of a dessert. I think that's insane.

Speaker 14 Yeah, that is weird.

Speaker 1 It's like drinking a glass of sour water at the start of a meal. Doesn't make sense.

Speaker 1 Exactly.

Speaker 1 This is what James does. He dips his toe in early doors, like in the water course, just to check to see if the guest is going to pick.

Speaker 1 cheese board for dessert and now he can relax you see now he's completely relaxed now he knows that you're not going to do that yeah i'm not going to do that maybe we'll start with dessert Maybe

Speaker 1 we're not doing any bad. I know you've always wanted to do that.

Speaker 1 We're going to stick to this world is topsy-turvy enough.

Speaker 1 We'll still do all the courses, but we can just start with dessert now and work our way backwards.

Speaker 1 We can't. James, the world is a mess.
We need to stick to some things. And

Speaker 1 start with the starter.

Speaker 1 Nobody asked for your opinion.

Speaker 1 Right. Well, fuck off.
Your eyes are too wide. What?

Speaker 1 Pop it absorb bread.

Speaker 1 Pop it absorb bread. Anne-Marie.
Pop Popadobs it or bread.

Speaker 14 Just figured out what you've said. Okay.

Speaker 14 Where? In a meal?

Speaker 1 Sure. Bread.

Speaker 1 I love the amount of time you took to work out the context. You're like, well, if it's in a meal, I'm going to have bread.

Speaker 1 What were the other contexts that popped up in your mind there, Anne-Marie, where you might have picked poppadoms? In a swimming pool?

Speaker 1 I think.

Speaker 14 I think I would have popped ons in a meal, but bread just generally, because I could eat a loaf of bread a day. Oh, yeah? I've had this, basically I got told that bread gives you cellulite, right?

Speaker 14 And it really made me sad. So I had to pull back on the bread.
And then I had a meeting with a personal trainer the other day, and I was like, does bread give you cellulite? And she was like, no.

Speaker 14 So now I eat loads of bread.

Speaker 1 I don't know many personal trainers that would give the green light on that.

Speaker 1 I'm not sure the personal trainer gave the green light on eat loads of bread i think the personal trader just said bread doesn't give you cellulite and you've now taken that as gospel and you're running with it and fair enough yeah what sort of bread are we talking if you if you have it in this dream meal what's your dream bread like a bagel a really soft chewy bagel that you get on brick lane uh-huh now james i don't know if i'm speaking out of place here i'm not sure we've had a bagel as the bread choice ever we've not had a bagel as the bread choice yet yeah first that's brilliant

Speaker 1 a bagel is a is a wonderful choice specifically from brick lane which one on Brick Lane, though? Because there's two warring shops on Brick Lane, aren't there?

Speaker 14 I know, I know. I don't know the name, but it's the one on the right.

Speaker 1 It depends what way you're facing, surely.

Speaker 1 If you're looking at them, the one on the right. Yeah.
Yeah. Always going with the one on the right is fine.
But then

Speaker 1 when you come out of one, the other one's down on the right.

Speaker 1 I also remember the bagel shops on Brick Lane like I remember Anton Deck. They're always in the same position.
Are you having anything on the bagel or just like or just the bagel?

Speaker 1 You're going to tear it apart and pick it up?

Speaker 14 The bagel is topped with Philadelphia. No butter, just Philadelphia.
That's my dream meal. No,

Speaker 1 actually, just is that it? Is this the end of this?

Speaker 14 Philadelphia bagel.

Speaker 1 Well, this is the quickest episode we've ever had.

Speaker 1 Someone's ended their dream meal at a Philadelphia bagel in the bread course. Now, I don't want to jump ahead here because I might be about to get this wrong.

Speaker 1 But before we started this episode, we were chatting to your PR PR who said that you would choose the Philadelphia sandwich. Now, is

Speaker 1 this the Philadelphia sandwich or is the Philadelphia sandwich something else? Like a cheesesteak sandwich? Because I'm now thinking, is the Philadelphia sandwich

Speaker 1 sandwich from Philadelphia? They have

Speaker 1 PR said Philadelphia sandwich. Did you think it was a sandwich from Philadelphia? Because I immediately assumed it was a cream cheese sandwich.

Speaker 1 Oh yeah, I thought it would be like a Philly cheesesteak sandwich or something.

Speaker 14 No.

Speaker 1 no, just actual cream cheese and bread.

Speaker 1 Already, before we've even got to the main meal, you have proved that your PR knows you better than anyone. Yeah.
The opposite of a stranger. Yes.

Speaker 1 How much, I mean, I've never met anyone so enamored with Philadelphia before. I mean, look, it's fine.
It's there. How much cream cheese are you eating?

Speaker 14 In two bagels, I could eat the whole tub.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 14 But I grew up on Philadelphia sandwiches. My mum and dad actually went to the doctors because they were worried that that was the only thing I was eating.

Speaker 14 I'd have cheese sandwich at lunchtime, come home, have two cheese sandwiches for dinner. I wouldn't eat any vegetables, no fruit, just cheese sandwiches.

Speaker 14 And they went to the doctor and he was like, well, is she growing okay? Is she healthy? And they were like, yeah. And he went, well, don't worry about it then.

Speaker 1 That doctor sounds very similar to your personal trainer.

Speaker 1 Is it just the same person that you've hired to make you feel good about the choices you want to make?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Also, it sounds like, you know, he's probably all day long dealing with people with actual illnesses and diseases and stuff like that.

Speaker 1 And then parents come in and go, she's eating Philadelphia cheese sandwiches all the time. It's like, get out of my office.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You can't convince your own child to eat something other than cheese sandwiches. That is not my problem.
When did you move on to other foods?

Speaker 1 Because you're obviously not eating three Philadelphia sandwiches a day now. now.
So when, do you remember the moment in your life where you thought, oh, you know what?

Speaker 1 I'm going to try something different.

Speaker 14 It's happened gradually, actually. Like I tried a tomato about five years ago and I just started eating onions.
They're a bit weird still, but I think I like them. It's happened over time.

Speaker 14 Then about three years ago, I watched What the Health?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 14 And I stopped eating meat. But the problem was I didn't eat vegetables either.
So then after that, I had had to force myself to eat vegetables and now I like them.

Speaker 1 What's your favourite vegetable?

Speaker 14 Aubergine, but closely followed by the courgette and butternut squash.

Speaker 1 Nice, you've got all the colours. I mean, I love the three of those as well.

Speaker 1 But I'd also say I was very surprised to hear those as your top three because, like, someone who's never had vegetables before didn't like them.

Speaker 1 And then you've got quite an acquired taste as your top, well, these are your top two. They're courgettes and aubergines.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 There's some people who love vegetables who steer clear of those don't like them think they're slimy whatever but you you've you've like gone all in yeah yeah it's like someone who's never heard music before starting with jazz yeah

Speaker 1 yeah

Speaker 14 i mean i only ate broccoli before i feel like broccoli and peas and all that are so boring and overused that i just wanted to have other stuff as my main thing.

Speaker 14 You know?

Speaker 1 So we're going for a Philadelphia bagel sandwich as your pop-adoms or bread choice. Yeah.
It's a good, heavy start to the meal as well. It is heavy.

Speaker 1 You are lining your stomach for the rest of the meal. And I respect that.

Speaker 1 I kind of like really stuck on the fact that you were so obsessed with Philadelphia cheese sandwiches because like I don't think I had cream cheese for a long time.

Speaker 1 I'm probably like you with vegetables actually,

Speaker 1 when it comes to cream cheese. Like it was a long time until I had cream cheese.
No one's given me cream cheese as a kid.

Speaker 1 In fact, it feels mad to me to imagine that that even popped up in your life as a child. Someone's like Jews in Philadelphia.

Speaker 14 I know, I don't know where it come from. I also,

Speaker 14 I feel like my whole life, I've had this eating

Speaker 14 thing because I have a phobia of vomit. I have a phobia of being sick, right? So I've never wanted to try anything.

Speaker 14 And I think that's why the vegetarian life works for me as well, because I feel like I won't get ill.

Speaker 1 My girlfriend is the same as you, Anne-Marie. She's also afraid of vomit.
I believe it's emetophobia, isn't it? I think is

Speaker 1 the name for it, which is, I find it very interesting that you like cream cheese because weirdly, her emetophobia is

Speaker 1 also tied to a fear of things like yogurt and cream cheese because of the texture of it. Wow.
And I've just realized, as I've said that, I'm worried I've just put you off cream cheese. I don't double.

Speaker 1 No, no.

Speaker 1 You can't put me off.

Speaker 14 Yeah, I've like when I was about 11 or 10, I went to Blackpool with my family for a karate competition.

Speaker 1 That's the puke capital of the UK.

Speaker 1 What were you thinking?

Speaker 14 Well, the day before the competition, we went on the fairground and we were on the waltzer.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 14 Which is the spinny round he won. Oh, no.
And

Speaker 14 not me i was fine a girl in my cup was like coughing and i was like don't worry she's just coughing she's just coughing

Speaker 14 and then she put her hand over her mouth and i was like what is going on and then i just saw something come out the side of her mouth

Speaker 14 and i was i stood up and i was like stop the ride please stop the ride she's gonna be sick and the guy was obviously like we don't care people are sick all the time and my brain this is how mad it is.

Speaker 14 My brain saw the ride stop. So my brain told me that it had stopped, right?

Speaker 14 And I stepped off it. Oh, man.
And it was still going full pelt. And I just like, yeah, come off of it.
But I was fine. I just walked off.
Oh, God.

Speaker 14 And my dad, mum and dad were just like watching this whole thing happen.

Speaker 1 Did you use your karate skills when you jumped off? Was that what I was doing? I must have. Yeah.
So you just like land perfectly. Do some karate moves, get off of the waltzes.

Speaker 14 So yeah, I'm so terrified of it that I think that that

Speaker 14 subconsciously made me not experiment with food until the past three years.

Speaker 1 So, that's why. I get that meat thing as well.
So, there's less chance of making a mistake and eating something that's old or something that's got some problems with it. Yeah, I totally get that.

Speaker 1 Smart. I mean, it's not going to stop me.

Speaker 1 I love vomit.

Speaker 1 Ed does love it. Second dinner, he calls it.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 We come to your starter. Yeah.
The proper meal starts now, although you've already had your favourite thing, so it seems a shame. Yeah, it's all downhill from me.
No.

Speaker 14 I think I would go for some sort of quinoa butternut squash salad with French dressing and some sort of

Speaker 14 healthy stuff.

Speaker 1 I can't remember the word for it. Is this really what you'd go for, Anne-Marie? Because even the way you said healthy stuff there made me feel like you don't want this at all.

Speaker 14 No, because I've become obsessed. Whenever I do something, which is why I have like 18 plants in my living room.
Yes. Because I'm obsessed now.

Speaker 14 And I started drawing and now I'm surrounded by my drawing. I now I'm like, I can only eat healthy things because why would I do it? So I actually am obsessed with quinoa and butternut squash so much.

Speaker 14 that I bought five butternut squashes and five packs of quinoa and I'm going to to make my lunch for the rest of the week.

Speaker 1 You're doing meal prep. That is so impressive in a pandemic as well.

Speaker 1 People are not using this time to look after themselves, and you're meal prepping butternut squash and quinoa like you've got a bodybuilding competition coming up.

Speaker 1 It's amazing. Yeah.

Speaker 14 So I actually love... I love quinoa so much.
I probably would throw in some jackfruit somewhere, like maybe some jackfruit wings with barbecue sauce that could go with it.

Speaker 1 That's all going in the starter with the quinoa and the button squash salad. You just got to chuck some wings on top of it.
Yeah. What is it? So I don't think anyone has chosen quinoa so far.

Speaker 1 Maybe they have. But what is it that you love about quinoa so much? Because a lot of people might be listening to this going, How, how can someone have quinoa as one of their choices?

Speaker 14 I just, I love it. It's like rice, but less ricey.

Speaker 1 There you go.

Speaker 1 If anyone from the quinoa marketing board is listening, we've just found your new slogan.

Speaker 1 I think James has found what he wants painted as well. If you could paint quinoa like rice, but less ricey.
Yo.

Speaker 1 Oh, I would love that as a quote. I would put that on my wall.

Speaker 14 And also, it fascinated me. This is disgusting.
But the first time I ate quinoa and I went to the toilet, it was still fully quinoa.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 And that made you think, I'm going to prep this for the week.

Speaker 14 It just fascinated me. It's the first thing I'd seen.

Speaker 1 How hadn't. No, no, no, I don't think that.

Speaker 1 I can't see that happening.

Speaker 1 It comes out the same as it goes in. I've never known anything.
It does. It does.

Speaker 1 Are you chewing? Are you just swallowing things like a big python?

Speaker 1 I couldn't believe that there was a whole butternut of squash in there as well.

Speaker 1 I mean, what? You looked back in the bowl and it was just like someone had emptied a bowl of quinoa in there. That's all it looked like.

Speaker 14 No, I'd eaten other things that day, obviously, so it was still normal. And then there was just quinoa there as well.

Speaker 14 I've never told anyone this.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 I think what I'm interested in is that leap then from you seeing that the first time and then going, God, I think I like quinoa even more now. Yeah.
I know. Oh, this is great.
What a weird.

Speaker 1 You feel like great. I'm going to have some more quinoa.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Does it appeal to you? Because do you think, oh, this means that if I'm ever sick from quinoa, it will just come out the same and it won't make me feel, it won't look like a horrible big pile of sick.

Speaker 1 It'll just look like a lovely bowl of quinoa when it comes out my mouth.

Speaker 14 Well, get this.

Speaker 14 I went to a hypnotherapist about my phobia and I said to her, because when I feel sick,

Speaker 14 I have to do this thing where I'm like, please go down and come out the other end. Like, please, I'd rather poo myself in public than be sick anywhere.

Speaker 14 And so I,

Speaker 14 another quote for you.

Speaker 14 I'd push it down like this in my brain. I'd make myself do that instead of throw up.

Speaker 14 And I went to the hypnotherapist and I was like, is that actually real? Can I actually do that? Is that possible for me to my brain be that powerful?

Speaker 14 to push it down instead of come out and she was like yeah

Speaker 1 yeah i'd call that a waste of jedi powers, is what I'd call that. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Don't say you're on the you're on the voice, you're sitting in the chair.

Speaker 1 Would you rather, bearing in mind you're face and the audience in that chair, you would rather shit yourself in front of all of them

Speaker 1 than puke. What, what, I, yes, you would rather do that.
You think that they would go home with more respect for you?

Speaker 14 Definitely not, but I would be happier.

Speaker 1 Imagine if Tom Jones was sick, though, just as he'd pressed the button to spin the chair around. It'd be like the waltzers all over again.
Oh, my God. He's happy like the Waltzers.

Speaker 1 I can't even think about it. If Tom Jones was sick, would you respect him a little bit less?

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 14 I would just

Speaker 14 be out of the building. Like, when it's on TV, like, say, if like casualties on or something, and someone's sick, I run out of my house.
Like, that's ridiculous.

Speaker 1 What if Tom Jones pressed the button to spin round and then it malfunctioned and then it just kept on spinning round and round and round?

Speaker 1 And Tom and Tom Jones was there screaming and being like, No, help me. And then he starts being sick while it's spinning.

Speaker 1 He's a lot like the guy on the waltzes with his hand on his mouth and he's looking at you every time every time it comes round. He's looking at you with big, stranger eyes.

Speaker 1 His eyes are getting bigger and bigger and bigger. He's asking you to help him.

Speaker 1 He's reaching out to you, helping you.

Speaker 1 I think I've found something that is unusual.

Speaker 14 Sometimes I have nightmares.

Speaker 14 They're quite regular. Someone comes up to me and says, where's the toilet? I need to be sick.

Speaker 14 And I say, it's over there. And then I run away and they think I'm showing them to the toilet.

Speaker 1 And then they're running after me.

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Speaker 1 What are you going for for the main course? Bear in mind, you've had a bagel and a big bowl of quinoa so far.

Speaker 14 The main course is

Speaker 14 another weird vegetable that

Speaker 14 people may not like is

Speaker 14 I forgot it.

Speaker 1 This is great.

Speaker 1 Guess the weird vegetable. Now, don't tell us the name of it.
Just try and describe it to us. Try and describe it to us as well so we can guess it.

Speaker 14 It's green and long.

Speaker 1 Okay, so it's either. I mean, you said courgette earlier.
You've already said you love a courgette.

Speaker 14 Yes, not a courgette.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 1 Cucumber?

Speaker 14 Not a cucumber.

Speaker 1 A cucumber does not a main course make.

Speaker 1 Green bean? No. A marrow?

Speaker 14 What's that?

Speaker 1 A marrow is like a massive courgette.

Speaker 1 You'd love it. I can't think of any other green and long vegetables.
Asparagus.

Speaker 14 Oh. No, but I do love asparagus.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I love asparagus.

Speaker 14 It's a little bit smaller than asparagus.

Speaker 1 Monge two?

Speaker 14 No, not that small.

Speaker 1 Yeah, rudder beans. not that small smaller than asparagus but bigger than a mange two

Speaker 1 what am i i'm lean i'm long smaller than an asparagus i am it's um it's a red it's like not very popular i don't think like not used a lot okra yes yes ok

Speaker 1 it's okra oh lovely great choice as well Absolutely. I'd tell you what gave it away was saying it's not very popular.

Speaker 1 Some people don't like it because you're you're right, because people don't like it because they think it's slimy. But

Speaker 1 how are you having your okra? How are you preparing it?

Speaker 14 I'm having okra in the fattest curry ever. I'm just going to put okra in there.
I'm going to put the white version of broccoli, cauliflower in there.

Speaker 1 Sorry, I can't remember the name.

Speaker 1 Played that game with yourself for a second,

Speaker 1 the white version of broccoli. Yeah,

Speaker 14 red peppers, yellow yellow peppers, just every vegetable, really. But okra is the main one.
Chickpeas. I don't really like lentils.
They're not going in.

Speaker 14 But yeah, mainly okra curry.

Speaker 1 Is there a place that you go to for okra curry that you want it to be from? Or do you cook your own okra curry? I'll cook my own.

Speaker 14 But people do do good okra curries, but it's very rare. You rarely get an okra option.
on a on a menu when you're eating out. So it's more of a home thing.

Speaker 1 You love it as well, right, james yeah i love it really love it and i have had it cooked loads of different ways and every time it's delicious and my favorite way probably is at gymcarna where they just they do the crispy okra where it's just like really crispy slices of it and you can just i can eat that forever it's very difficult to stop eating that especially when like you get a bowl for the table and you're like oh i've got to be considerate share this with everybody but i just want to i just want to put it away i don't want anyone else to get anywhere near this I feel that about Padron peppers yes I should have put that in my starters because

Speaker 14 they are my favorite one of my favorite things ever and they're a dish that people share and it really annoys me

Speaker 1 and it's it's hard to stop eating them you're just like that yeah but here's the I think the one good thing that's going to come out of this pandemic is I think I think it's the death of sharing.

Speaker 1 I think people are going to have to be way more careful now.

Speaker 1 So we might finally get back into restaurants at some point this year but i think there's going to be a new culture of order your own and stick to your own and i love it yeah i like that sorry you can't have any of my padron peppers do you not remember the pandemic now hold on a second go on now we're in this situation where i-marie said padron peppers which is what i'd say and you said padron peppers you said padron yeah that was yeah Now what is going on?

Speaker 1 I think I occasionally say Padron. I occasionally say Padron.

Speaker 1 But I've never heard anyone say Padron. Oh, well,

Speaker 1 maybe I'm just marching to the beat of my own drum. What what can I say? Padron, Padron.
Padron. I'm thinking of it in Spanish.
Padron, Padron, Padron. Padron.

Speaker 1 I'm happy with Padron. Padron.

Speaker 14 Padron. It's like when people say, for example, I say Primark, my mum says Primark.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but your mum's just completely wrong in that scenario, right?

Speaker 14 Maybe, but it's like we all said Ikea. We all said Ikea before the advert came on and said ikea.

Speaker 1 We were all like, what?

Speaker 14 So maybe my mum is right.

Speaker 1 It's pre-mark. That's how I talk about the world before Mark Owen.
Yeah. Before Mark Take Owen.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Before Tape That came hit the scene. How spicy is the curry, Anne-Marie?

Speaker 14 Oh, this is where I lose respect.

Speaker 14 If I didn't already by talking about the poo and quinoa,

Speaker 14 I have it plain.

Speaker 1 Plain.

Speaker 1 Like

Speaker 14 no spice at all. And the reason why I said plain is because that Landos have that chart, don't they? Yeah.

Speaker 14 And I choose plain on that.

Speaker 1 Wow. Wow.
Which plain option do you go for? The mango or the lime? No, there is a plain as in no mango.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, even below that.
Yeah, like just chicken. Oh my god.

Speaker 1 Because the plain, because the mango and lime, I think it is, is it? Or the and the lemon and herb both have a little bit of chili in them. Yeah.
They're mild. They're too much.

Speaker 1 So you get the nat basically like the Nandino one, right, for the kids. Yeah.

Speaker 14 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Amarie, do you mind if I just have a little quick meeting with Ed?

Speaker 1 Of course.

Speaker 1 What's up, James? Are we allowed to kick out a guest if

Speaker 1 if they don't say the secret ingredient, but if they say something which we deem to be irredeemable? for example, having plain at Nando's. I don't think so.

Speaker 1 I think we uh we have to accept that people like all different things.

Speaker 1 And if Anne-Marie wants a plain chicken at Nando, she can have a plain chicken at Nando's. Don't see what the point of going in Nando's is if you just have a plain chicken muscle.

Speaker 1 We've already talked to her about her poo for quite a long time, and I'll be honest, I think we asked her so many questions about that, she was starting to get a bit uncomfortable and wanted to move the conversation along.

Speaker 1 I think we just have to accept that some people like plain chicken. I like a plain chicken, I like a roast chicken.

Speaker 1 You wouldn't go to Nando's in order it, though? No, but everyone's different. Okay, well, let's return and see if

Speaker 1 we can back up why she does it, but

Speaker 1 I'm not feeling very good about this.

Speaker 1 Sorry about that, Anne-Marie. We just had to have a quick chat about it.
Nothing to do with you.

Speaker 1 So plain chicken at Nando's. That's interesting.
How do your friends react when you do that?

Speaker 14 They don't like me very much.

Speaker 14 They're embarrassed. They are embarrassing me.
Listen, I am really trying. I actually

Speaker 14 have a hot sauce in my house.

Speaker 1 That's a good first step.

Speaker 14 That I have sometimes with Philadelphia bagels.

Speaker 1 Is that how you have to introduce every new food into your diet? You have to introduce it through the old faithful first. Yeah.

Speaker 14 My dad likes spice and my sister does a little bit, but it was never really a thing in my house until I started, you know, making friends as I got older. And they were just like, what?

Speaker 14 They just couldn't believe that I didn't like spice.

Speaker 14 I am trying and

Speaker 14 I think I could do it. It's just I have a really sensitive tongue.
Like, I can tell when there's really minute

Speaker 14 things in a meal because my tongue is, I guess it's because I was brought up on the cream cheese. As soon as anything else touches it, it's like extreme.

Speaker 1 Because some people might think that that diet meant that your taste buds buds would get dulled over time. But actually, for you,

Speaker 1 it's the anything that isn't Philadelphia cream cheese. It's a blank canvas because you basically you've just been sustaining yourself with Philadelphia.
So no other flavours have touched it.

Speaker 1 So now even the slightest dot of spice, even if it's cut with Philadelphia. Yeah.

Speaker 14 And plus,

Speaker 14 I think Nando's would be okay with me eating plain. Otherwise, they wouldn't put it on the menu, you know.

Speaker 14 But in the end, if I actually think about this, because I don't eat chicken, when I go to Nando's,

Speaker 14 all I really eat are the sides. So I have olives, coleslaw, peri chips, peri chips.

Speaker 14 That's got a little bit of spice in it.

Speaker 1 That's pretty adventurous. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And the corner of the cob.

Speaker 14 So I have the sides.

Speaker 1 They do a lovely butternut squash wrap, though. You could have the butternut squash wrap.

Speaker 14 Are you joking me?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think they do a butternut squash

Speaker 1 vegan thing, don't they? They do. And you love butternut squash.
Don't they do a big quinoa salad?

Speaker 1 Yeah, they do a big quinoa salad, Anne-Barie.

Speaker 14 Are you joking me?

Speaker 1 No. No.

Speaker 14 I'm going to make a promise, right? This today.

Speaker 14 Next time I go to Nando's,

Speaker 14 I'm going to get the medium spice.

Speaker 1 Wow. That's a big jump as well.
If you're going past lemon and herb and the mango,

Speaker 1 straight to medium, are we sure? I'm not sure I want to take responsibility for what's going to happen here.

Speaker 14 I've never had a stingy bum hole in spice.

Speaker 1 What I like about that sentence is that you considered each word quite carefully and still landed on the worst one each time.

Speaker 1 Okay, which way are we going with this sentence?

Speaker 14 I've never understood it because everyone says, obviously, oh, God, watch in the toilet the next day.

Speaker 14 I never knew what that meant. Yeah.
So maybe I'll experience that for the first time.

Speaker 1 That'll be nice. Something to look forward to, isn't it?

Speaker 14 I'll let you know.

Speaker 1 It's going to be quite the jump from the cool, creamy Philadelphia bumhole. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 14 It sounds so extreme when you say bum hole, but when I say it, it feels fine.

Speaker 1 So come on to your side dish.

Speaker 14 No, I'm just going to go for garlic bread.

Speaker 1 Bread's back.

Speaker 14 Bread's back.

Speaker 1 Just like the personal trainer ordered. Here we go.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Second to your regime. I like it.
You know, she's giving you a very strict diet.

Speaker 14 Garlic is one of my favourite things in the whole world. I use it so much when I'm cooking that I no longer smell it.

Speaker 14 And

Speaker 14 this was when we were allowed to be out. Me and my friend went shopping.
She always cusses me out for smelling like garlic.

Speaker 1 I said your friend might be a vampire.

Speaker 14 So we were out shopping. She keeps saying to me, God, you smell of garlic.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 she sounds like she hates you.

Speaker 14 And she has

Speaker 14 she has perfume with her all the time. And we're in a shop and she walks past me and coughs.
Obviously, this was way before COVID.

Speaker 14 She coughs. And I was like, what just happened there? She actually sprayed her perfume on me

Speaker 14 and coughed at the same time hoping I wouldn't hear it spray out.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 14 Just because she was embarrassed that I smelt of garlic.

Speaker 1 She didn't want to be hanging out with a garlic lady. No.

Speaker 14 So garlic bread is like, yeah, it's a dream, really. It's a dream combination.
And with a curry, oh, yeah, can't go wrong.

Speaker 1 So obviously, garlic bread can come in many forms. It's sort of a baguette garlic bread.
You can have like a flatbread pizza style garlic bread.

Speaker 1 Those those are the two i can think of so not not that many actually

Speaker 14 it's spaghette baguette garlic bread already pre-done though i just get those ones that come in a pack of two and uh just shove it in the freezer for whenever i need it two slices yeah two two baguettes i like the big

Speaker 1 like proper baguette garlic bread that's like sliced but not down all the way and that's sweaty and you can tear it open and it's like it's like got too much moisture in it like it's really juicy garlic bread that you can still tear apart that's the best that sounds like it would have been cooked in a microwave instead of the oven no no no no in the oven i

Speaker 1 actually your the one you said makes me think more of a microwave than ones that are sliced already no i think you're talking about the same garlic breads here we're talking about the same you're talking you're talking at crossbreads we're talking about the same thing you're talking about the same bread i think it's a good call to buy them from the shop because i've tried to make them before because my mum makes a good garlic bread like with a proper baguette and slices it and puts the right amount of garlic butter in which is you know not too little but not too much because i tried to make one last week and if i'm putting garlic butter in i'm going to town I'm putting loads in and then wrap it in foil.

Speaker 1 I put it in the oven. It came out.
It's like I dipped the baguette in melted garlic butter. It was soggy.
There was no crispy elements. It was just, it was too much.

Speaker 1 And I speak as someone who, as he was putting the garlic butter in, was popping little bits of raw garlic butter in his mouth. Oh, oh.
Oh, your friend would hate Ed. Yes.

Speaker 1 Ed. Because I can tell you from experience, Ed stinks.

Speaker 14 Can we also talk about the way you said baguette?

Speaker 1 Oh, have I done it again?

Speaker 14 I mean, I say baguette and you say baguette.

Speaker 1 Baguette. Interesting.

Speaker 1 Pedron

Speaker 1 difference. But, yeah, baguette, baguette.

Speaker 14 What do I say? Yeah, what do you say? Baguette.

Speaker 1 I think I say baguette. You say long bread.
Long bread, yeah, yeah. I say long bread.

Speaker 1 Oh, that sound. We talk about the film a lot, but Ratatouille, when she squeezes the bread and it makes that crunching sound.

Speaker 1 She's just like, that's how you tell a good loaf of bread is how it sounds.

Speaker 1 James loves Ratatouille. He loves the sound of the bread in Ratatouille.
Sometimes I see him and he's listening to music on his headphones, or I think it's music.

Speaker 1 And then I listen to it through one of the headphones, and it's just that sound over and over again. He's just listening.
It's just the bread noise from Ratatouille, which he squeezes the bread.

Speaker 1 Show him how good the bread should sound.

Speaker 1 I heard that you recently, you recently, your single, your new single charted at number two in the charts. Congratulations, that's very impressive.
Thank you. I've got news for you.

Speaker 1 Number one was the sound of that bread.

Speaker 1 So it's drink time now, Anne-Marie. What are you going for for your drink and your dream meal?

Speaker 14 It's out of two. I couldn't really decide.

Speaker 14 One is a blue WKD

Speaker 14 and the other one is a Malibu and Coke.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Amazing.

Speaker 1 You've taken us from an Indian restaurant to Italy and then all the way to a club in Magalouf. And

Speaker 1 I love it. Blue WKD.

Speaker 1 Look, let's talk about the blue WKD first.

Speaker 1 I'm not sure I've had one. What? I've never had one.
What? Now, weirdly, I think I've had... Did they do one with Iron Brew once? I think I've had the orange one.

Speaker 1 I've had the orange one, but I've never had the blue one, mainly because it's blue.

Speaker 14 It's quite... Yes, very blue.

Speaker 1 If you don't mind me asking, Anne-Marie,

Speaker 1 how old are you?

Speaker 14 29.

Speaker 1 Okay, so I'm 36. It's mad you're 36, isn't it? Yeah.
What I'm saying is, I remember blue WKDs hitting the scene. I was a teenager, I think,

Speaker 1 and I was warned about them because you know, there'd been a hooch epidemic before them, yeah, where like hooch had been, you know, teenagers had been necking them too fast and getting their stomachs pumped and all sorts.

Speaker 1 And then these blue WKDs came in, and it was like, you know, just the new face on an old danger. You know, everyone was like, oh no, they're basically doing it again to us.

Speaker 1 They're making alcohol delicious and we're going to get our stomachs pumped. And I was a good little boy.
I was very scared of these drinks and I never had them.

Speaker 1 And by the time I was very late to drinking and like, I didn't really get into drinking until my late 20s. So like, by then, I wasn't going to be ordering a blue WKD.
You know, that would be mad.

Speaker 1 So I didn't do it. Because

Speaker 1 that's not entry-level stuff when you're that age, you know? So like, I've just missed the whole boat, I think. I was too scared and then too old.

Speaker 1 I think that's exactly the sort of thing that you would order now. because you love sweet stuff.
You love like brightly coloured stuff. I think blue WKD, which I can't say, I keep saying blue.

Speaker 1 Cubble UKD. I don't know what's wrong with you.

Speaker 1 What is it you guys call it? A blue couple of your KD?

Speaker 14 Please try it. If you like bright coloured stuff and sweet stuff, WKD is perfect for you.

Speaker 1 Just try it. How would you describe it to me? Because I've never had it before.

Speaker 14 I think it's like bubblegum flavour.

Speaker 14 I don't really like the taste of alcohol, which is why WKD and Malibu.

Speaker 14 So it's just delicious. It tastes like a fruit drink.

Speaker 1 I never got on board with the WKD thing.

Speaker 1 We were more of a Smirnoff ice crew. Loved a Smirnoff ice.
We used to drink turbo shandies, a half pint of lager topped up with Smirnoff ice, which was

Speaker 1 absolutely perfect. How old were you? Oh, I was probably between the ages of about 16 and 19.
were probably, uh, we were probably turbo shandying all over the place.

Speaker 1 How many blue WKDs could you drink on a night out? That's what I'm always fascinated by because

Speaker 1 I'd say I drink way less now than I used to. I couldn't put away more than two beers now or one Smurnoff ice.
I just couldn't do it.

Speaker 1 If you're on a night out, are you starting with blue WKD and continuing with that throughout the evening, or is it for a certain point in the night?

Speaker 14 Well, I'm a lightweight, so it doesn't take much for me to feel that way.

Speaker 14 I'd say I'd start with a WKD. Probably I'll just have like a little one because you know they come big.
So I'll just have like a little one.

Speaker 14 Then I'd go out and then me and my friends would do tequila rose shots.

Speaker 1 Oh. Have you ever had that? No, no.

Speaker 14 Tequila Rose.

Speaker 14 The best thing you'll ever put in your mouth.

Speaker 1 So hold on. And yeah, it's been beaten by.

Speaker 1 At the moment I feel like this is that like you're talking to your two grandads because you keep saying things like tequila rose, have you had that? We go, no, what's this? Fan, God's sake.

Speaker 14 Well, first of all, it doesn't taste of tequila. It's like a cream, like a pink cream that just literally tastes of strawberry, but it has tequila in it.

Speaker 14 And me and my friends have a song that goes with when we when we have these shots. Yes.
And it goes, tequila rose, tequila rose,

Speaker 14 in your mouth and up your nose and in your eyeball

Speaker 1 falls apart slightly at the end there

Speaker 1 really starts strong and I guess when you were first singing the tequila rose song every so did someone hear you singing that in the club and they were like I think she's got something sign her up

Speaker 14 that was yeah that was it well it started just as tequila rose in your mouth and then it went up someone's nose and we added the nose part and then it went in someone's eye and we added the eye bit at the end.

Speaker 1 you want to ward off strangers any strangers wanting to get involved and in your eyes all this goddamn strangers

Speaker 14 yeah it's delicious but the reason why i didn't say it for my choice is because it's a shot you don't you don't just sip it after tequila rose

Speaker 1 i could have a jaeger meister jaeger bomb could have that getting more serious now um you know how catchy that song is actually that song is so catchy i know that every time you say tequila rose now now i'd literally

Speaker 1 just go straight into it i've only heard it once

Speaker 1 yeah

Speaker 1 um after the jaeger bombs i'd probably then go on to malibu and coke so your night out is blue wickeds tequila rose tequila rose uh and then uh

Speaker 1 and then jaeger bomb and then you'll have your malibu and coke at the end of the night yeah i mean the fact that this started by you saying you were a lightweight and then listing all of those things is i'm a bit of a a lightweight you see i've just had blue wkd tequila rose jaegermeister and then just move on to malibu and coax the rest

Speaker 14 oh by this time i'm smashed and a liability so it hardly ever gets to that point i just have the wkd and have a great time but if it gets to that point that's the stages i go in here's an extra food question that i can't believe we've never asked a guest before Are you eating something when you're really hammered when you get back or on the way home?

Speaker 1 And if so, what's your choice?

Speaker 14 probably pizza yeah i think yeah

Speaker 14 pizza with i'm a sauce girl so i i eat everything with sauce

Speaker 14 everything

Speaker 14 so because i have this thing where like dry food in my mouth i've never really been comfortable with it so this is another weird thing about me ever since i was young i'd eat my sandwich and drink at the same time so everything's like in my mouth at the same time

Speaker 14 um and then i got to a point where i was like Why am I lifting my sandwich up and lifting my drink up after?

Speaker 14 So I ended up just dipping my sandwiches in my drink and eating them, and then it just like became a thing of everything I eat. I dip in my drink.

Speaker 1 Did you ever find it was a bit of a problem? You get bits of Philadelphia and you blew WKD. Yeah, I actually was like, was your bagel blue?

Speaker 14 I've actually never tried that. I'm going to try it.
A Philly bagel dipped in WKD. I reckon that would be so good because it's squizzy in it.

Speaker 1 Oh god, yeah.

Speaker 14 That's my thing. I can't eat foods without liquid of some sort.
So sauces, barbecue sauce, aioli is one of my favourites. Ranch sauce, French dressing, Caesar sauce.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 14 yeah.

Speaker 1 You're the opposite of Paul Rudd. Did you know this? That the actor Paul Rudd doesn't like any sauce.
He will only eat dry food. What?

Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly our reaction. I mean, we found this out from Ashling B, but he refuses to come on the podcast probably because he knows we'd absolutely, to use your phrase earlier, cuss him out for it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we would cuss him. Why?

Speaker 14 But that's a it's a like I would say, why? Yeah, has he got a fear of it, like mixing or something?

Speaker 1 He would probably ask you why you dip all your food in your

Speaker 1 that's like an eating competition technique. You know, when you see people at like hot dog eating competitions, they dip, they dip their hot dogs into their water.

Speaker 14 Yeah, oh, see, I thought mine came from like cereal and having like the cereal and the milk. And then I was like, well, people dip their biscuits in their cup of tea.

Speaker 14 Then it just became like a normal thing that you do with everything.

Speaker 1 The bagel.

Speaker 14 I don't think I'd dip a hot dog in water as well. Water's just,

Speaker 14 it doesn't give you any extra flavour to your meal. It's just like soggy food.
So I tend to go for a cup of tea or orange juice or Coke, you know, something with a bit of flavor.

Speaker 1 Not sure if that's

Speaker 1 if that's Moa Palin.

Speaker 2 We get it.

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Speaker 1 We come now to the dessert, the big closer.

Speaker 14 I would say something like sticky toffee pudding, but it's so boring that I didn't want to say that. So I chose a knobbly bobbly

Speaker 14 and

Speaker 14 one of those wish things, you know, what are they called?

Speaker 1 Fortune cookies.

Speaker 14 Fortune cookies. And I literally, for some reason, I don't know why.
There is one on my floor right there. I don't know why it's there.

Speaker 1 Well, obviously, you've got to open it on the podcast. We've got to go with the fortune is

Speaker 1 okay.

Speaker 1 What would the fortune be?

Speaker 1 You will try a medium spice

Speaker 1 at Nando's.

Speaker 14 Oh, this is crap. Let's face it, after 2020, the only way is up.
Hello, 2021.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 That doesn't sound very wise. It's not much of a fortune prediction.
It's just the year after 2020 is 2021. We all know that.

Speaker 1 Cookie to tell us that. Thank you.

Speaker 1 Even the people writing the fortunes and fortune cookies have started trying now. Well, let's face it.

Speaker 1 It shouldn't start with let's face it. No fortune cookies

Speaker 1 to start with the phrase let's let's face it.

Speaker 1 So do you actually like the the taste of fortune cookies then? Yeah.

Speaker 14 I'd have about five of those just to make sure I get a fortune that actually connects with me.

Speaker 14 And then, yeah, the nobbly bobbly is the queen of ice lollies.

Speaker 1 The queen of ice lollies. Take us through a knobbly bobbly because I've not had one.
I've not had a knobbly bobbly in years.

Speaker 14 I think knobbly bobbly starts with like...

Speaker 14 I don't know what way it is, whether it's the chocolate or the strawberry.

Speaker 14 I'm just going to say it's chocolate in the middle, then strawberry, and then on the outside, just all of those hundreds of thousand things

Speaker 14 all the way down. Because people always say, Oh, a fab's better, but it's not because the best bit of the fab is the top bit, and that's what a knobbly bobbly is the whole way.

Speaker 1 Sure, when you say people say a fab's better, how often would you say you have this conversation?

Speaker 14 Well, I guess whenever I

Speaker 14 say, whenever I'm at an an ice cream van and I say, I'm having a knobbly bobbly,

Speaker 14 and they're like, why don't you get a fab? And then we have that conversation.

Speaker 1 Your friends say that to you, not the ice cream man.

Speaker 14 No, he doesn't say that. He don't care.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I could honestly say, if someone said to me, what dessert do you think Anne-Marie's going to pick? Even in a million years, I never would have guessed a knobbly bobbly and a fortune cookie.

Speaker 1 It was actually mad

Speaker 1 I didn't realise how mad it was until you put it like that.

Speaker 1 I have a nobly bobbly and a fortune, could you please?

Speaker 1 You can. It's the dream restaurant.
I'm gonna read your order back to you now, Anne-Marie.

Speaker 1 Okay. See how you feel about it.
Here we go. Still water is what you wanted.
Popped on bread. You would like a Philadelphia bagel sandwich from the right-hand shop on Brick Lane and on the right.

Speaker 1 Starter, you want quinoa butnut squash salad with French dressing and healthy stuff, maybe jackfruit wings with barbecue sauce.

Speaker 1 Main course, oka curry with cauliflower, aka the white broccoli with red peppers, yellow peppers and chickpeas. No spice, zero spice.

Speaker 1 Drink, blue WKD slash Malibu and Coke slash tequila rose. Tequila Rose.

Speaker 1 Dessert, a knobbly bobbly with a fortune cookie.

Speaker 14 Oh, that sounds delicious.

Speaker 1 It's a great menu, but it's like you've just written down as many different ingredients as possible on different bits of paper, then thrown them in the air and pick them up randomly. Yes.

Speaker 1 Do you know what? It's one of the most important menus for, like, I mean, you know, this is why we have these discussions because context is important.

Speaker 1 And if I showed anyone this menu on its own, they would go, that person's mad.

Speaker 1 But if they knew all about you and your different phobias and all that sort of stuff, then the menu makes sense. It makes sense.
Yeah, it was fantastic.

Speaker 1 Thank you very much, Aborie, for coming to the Dream Restaurant. Thank you.
Thank you.

Speaker 1 Well, there we go. Hello, Benito.
Oh, there we go. Sorry, welcome, Benito back.

Speaker 1 There was the off-medu menu of Anne-Marie. Thank you very much for coming in to the Dream Restaurant, Anne-Marie, and for picking such a weird menu.
We will now plug your single, Don't Play. Yeah,

Speaker 1 I think you've earned it. Such a wacky old menu.
I could only imagine what your music would sound like. Wacky too, i guess the musical equivalent of a knobbly bobbly and a fortune cookie

Speaker 1 yes anne-marie uh has released a new single called don't play with ksi and digital farm animals uh who i believe she calls knobbly bobbly and the fortune cookie yes um so go and check that out uh

Speaker 1 stream it i don't know what you kids are doing stream it buy it um me and james will probably get it on vinyl yeah and go and check that out and the voice of course uh the legendary talent show which Anne-Marie is a judge on is on Saturdays I TV 8 30 straight after the masked singer or if you're me it's on YouTube and you watch it and cry yes Anne-Marie did not say Ribina Tooth kind but it would have been out of place it wouldn't have been out of place

Speaker 1 blue WKD is the sort of alcoholic Ribena Tooth kind I'd say yeah I mean she's dipping most of her foods in drinks anyway so most likely if we did let her eat that meal who knows what drinks would be brought up to the table, and maybe

Speaker 1 one slip through our fingers there. She even mentioned a secret ingredient which one of our past guests was kicked out for.

Speaker 1 Hundreds and thousands came up, which now just sends a chill of excitement down my spine. Every time someone says hundreds of thousands, I'm like, yes, should we kick them out anyway?

Speaker 1 Kick them out, and they'll land on Jade because she's already

Speaker 1 just lying in front of the restaurant all the time from when we kicked her out.

Speaker 1 So go and check all those Anne-Marie things out.

Speaker 1 Oh, James, we should plug our live stream.

Speaker 1 We had to move it by a couple of weeks, but it means a lot more people now know about it and a lot more people can make it because I've got a lot of messages from people saying, We couldn't make it before, and now I can.

Speaker 1 And now it's my birthday, and it's going to be a great night. So, watch Off Menu, the Redemption Dinner Party.

Speaker 1 We're having previous guests back who made awful choices and giving them a chance to make up for their past mistakes. Go on our website, offmenupodcast.co.uk, or go on dice.fm and buy some tickets.

Speaker 1 It's on the 7th of Feb, James, on a Sunday, isn't it? I'm very excited. As big old redemption dinner party on a Sunday, let's see if these people can redeem themselves or if they even want to.

Speaker 1 Maybe some of them will be stubborn and stick to their original choices and we can tear them apart all over again. Yes.
Oh, actually, sorry, James. I've just looked over in the

Speaker 1 free food corner. We've been very lucky boys recently, haven't we? Oh, thank you so much to the people who have sent us some cook-at-home kits.
Yes,

Speaker 1 Best of both worlds, right? B-O-B-W, mate.

Speaker 1 We've had some wonderful pork buns from Flesh and Buns, which is a great restaurant that comes up a lot in Catherine Bohart's episode.

Speaker 1 And now I'm doing mine tonight, James. I believe you've done yours already.
I loved it. So I did it yesterday.
So easy to do. I just, I mean, I know this sounds like I'm advertising it, but like...

Speaker 1 It's just genuinely from the heart. Cook it so easy.
Just so tasty, man.

Speaker 1 I was sitting there eating and feeling like oh, this is a proper treat been a long time since a proper treat We're not we're not getting treats all the time these days at home, you know, you get a takeaway or you cook your own meal takeaways a treat mate takeaway is a treat.

Speaker 1 Come on. Yeah, takeaways a treat cooking your own meals a treat.
They both got good things there. But this is like, oh, I'm getting restaurant quality food in my home.

Speaker 1 Because I've just made it and it's not there. Takeaway sometimes.
Some of the stuff is lost in the transit, you know? And you go, oh, this has been on the back of a bike.

Speaker 1 Making this, I was like, I feel like I'm in a restaurant, but the restaurant is my house, which I wish every restaurant was. Well, more and more restaurants are doing it.

Speaker 1 We've also been sent some amazing dumplings from My Neighbours the Dumplings, which is a dumpling restaurant in Dolston, I believe, which came up on Josie Long's episode. So

Speaker 1 these are all off-menu certified bangers. So go and check out My Neighbours the Dumplings.
They're doing some great cocktails and stuff as well. Do go and have a look at that.

Speaker 1 And thank you so much for sending us those guys let's say goodbye for now and we'll see you next week on the off menu podcast bye

Speaker 15 Hello, I'm Lou Sanders and if you've enjoyed this podcast you might like my podcast, Cuddle Club.

Speaker 1 It's about cuddling, yes.

Speaker 15 But really it's just a way into relationships and asking cheeky questions like who was your mum's favourite and when were you lost unfaithful.

Speaker 15 Previous guests include Alan Davies, Ashley B, Catherine Myan, Rich Dosman, Ed Gamble, Nish Kumar and other legends. Get it on ACAS, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, wherever you get your all podcasts.

Speaker 15 And remember to CC everybody in. CC stands for cuddle club.

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