Ep 70: Andi Oliver

James, huge news from the world of off-menu and indeed the world of the world.

Yes.

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The show will be on Monday, the 16th of March.

It's going to be a tasting menu, a returning guest coming back, receiving the menu of another previous guest.

Those shows have been a lot of fun.

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Who will we pull out of our little magic bag?

You'll have to come along on the 16th of March to find out.

If I'm correct in thinking, presale tickets go on pre-sale on the 10th of September.

Pre-sale tickets are 10th of September at 10 a.m.

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So if you miss out on the pre-sale, don't forget general sale is only two days later.

The day in between is for reflecting.

Get your tickets from royalalberthall.com Hall.com or offmenupodcast.co.uk.

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Welcome to the off-menu podcast, warming the kernels of chat and popping them into the corn of good times.

It's a food podcast.

I'm Ed Gamble.

Hello, James.

Hello, James Acaster here.

Ed, I think you got there in the end there.

Oh, we got there in the end.

The thing is, I thought, yes,

the kernels of conversation.

And then I hadn't thought about the second half and what you would actually say.

Yes.

Well, really, you know, you've embarrassed yourself because everyone knows that kernels come from mustard.

Hmm?

Colonel mustard.

So, explain what the podcast is, James.

We have a guest on and we're going to ask them their favourite ever, starter, main course, dessert, side dish and drink.

And this week's guest is

Andy Oliver.

And Oliver.

Andy Oliver, she's a chef.

She's a brilliant broadcaster.

She was a musician in her early career.

She's done loads of amazing stuff.

So we're very excited to welcome her on top of it.

Love having a chef on.

Love having a chef on.

Love having a chef on indeed.

I'm sure she's got some great dishes up her sleeve.

But unfortunately, if Andy Oliver says a secret ingredient, which we will now say, if she says that, she's out on her ear, mate.

Bye, Andy.

Oh, boy.

And this week's secret ingredient is tinned salmon.

Salmon.

Tin salmon.

No, thank you.

I once did a laboring job for two weeks, the only time I've done any physical work in my life.

Going to say that was news to me.

Yes, two weeks with a man called Paul.

And he would, every day for lunch, if it was raining, we'd have to sit in his van and eat lunch and he would eat a tin of salmon with a teaspoon.

Oh boy, Paul, that doesn't smell it doesn't

it doesn't smell good, it clearly doesn't taste nice, it's not good food.

So Andy Oliver's every day, mate.

He had a dodgy ticker and he was told eat lots of fish, uh, but I don't think they meant out the tin in a van.

No, um, so if she says tin salmon, she's gone.

But for now, let's listen to the off-menu menu of Andy Oliver.

Oliver.

Welcome, Andy Oliver, to the Dream Restaurant.

Hello, lovely.

Welcome, Andy Oliver, to the Dream Restaurant.

We've been expecting you for some time.

So that's very high-tech around here, isn't it?

Yes.

That was very impressive.

It's like that dude who used to do hip-hop on Radio One, whose name I can't remember.

Westwood, Tim Westwood.

Yeah, Yeah, that was very Tim Westwood.

Yeah, I am the Tim Westwood of genies, and everyone's always said that.

Let's play down the Westwood chat.

Oh, something happened.

Let's dial down the Westwood chat.

It's very much.

I'm not on social media anymore, so I don't know what's going on.

I am not

the Tim Westwood of genies.

You're not...

No, you really don't want to be, trust me.

How are you, boys?

Yeah, good, thank you.

How are you?

Thank you.

I'm kind of great, actually.

I've been very busy throughout this.

You know, through the whole lockdown scenario, everybody's like, Oh, I'm a bit bored.

I'm like, Are you?

Because I haven't stopped.

I'm literally exhausted.

I've been recording from home, making weird internet cooking shows with my daughter, having a very funny time, forcing her.

Actually, when I say making, I mean forcing her to make an internet TV

cooking show with me called What's for Dinner Mummy,

which I made her say.

I make her say it every time.

She gets really irritated.

I go she tries to start I go no no no what are you gonna call it she goes what's for dinner mummy makes me laugh and not I mean all I can do is keep myself amused you know what I mean I mean that is very funny

I don't have kids but I kind of want to have kids now just to make them do that just to torture them that is what they're for yeah no nobody rig in and complain about that because it's just true so leave it

no complaints it's about torturing your kids and what sort of things have been for dinner and what's for dinner, mummy?

Oh,

what was the first thing?

We did an Escovich fish, which is quite interesting.

Escovich is quite interesting, actually, because at the moment,

I'm sort of researching old heritage Caribbean recipes.

And it is quite interesting because the Caribbean is one of those places where so many different

colonials have been through and left their kind of DNA and all the food.

So there's food from Portugal, India, there's Chinese, there's, you know, african there's uh english there's italian there's spanish there's french everything running through and escabic is one of those things that's kind of got a bit of portuguese it's got a bit of african it's like it's a in in portugal they call it escabes and it's a basically a sort of fried fish with a sort of pickle so and in the caribbean you sort of make a seasoned flour you make it really crisp and then you do a scotch bonnet pickle but i do a like roasted scotch bonnet pickle on the top and it's really delicious and we do a little turmeric golden broth with it it's very pretty so and are you making that in your kitchen and your daughter's making that in a different kitchen no no no she was here with us for like four weeks

love lucky girl she was here with us for four weeks but she lives opposite us so then we made her her house into our so we made it one house so she could go home basically and escape

across the road but she she lives across the road um and then her flat moves moved out so we made it into one house so she could go home so me and her started going over there so we had two flats basically as well and when when you're not filming what's for dinner mummy do you make her do that for the other meals as well what's for breakfast mummy

no but i might start that's a really good idea i like it have you considered during lockdown maybe building from your roof to your daughter's roof a bridge that goes over the

road and and you can walk through it like a service yeah the services when the services are listed

i hate it when they do that by the way yeah when when you get all excited about there's a Marks and Spencer's at the services, and it turns out you've got to walk across the bridge.

It's on the other side of the road.

I think that's bang out of order.

I'm really sorry.

They need to warn you of that before you pull in.

Yeah, they need to say there is a Marks and Spencer's, but you have to cross this really weird, creepy bridge to get to it.

I think they should tell you that before it happens.

Seriously.

Mentioning no names, Fleet.

Fleet, it's Fleet.

That's exactly where it happens.

Boom.

Boom.

Boom to Fleet.

The weird, creepy bridge.

We always start with still sparkling water on this podcast.

Still.

There you go.

That was easy.

Stop messing around.

Well, I like sparkling water, but only on certain occasions.

I'm not even sure what those occasions are.

But with dinner, I like a nice glass of, not too cold.

I'm very weird about...

things that are too over-refrigerated.

I like things, I like things with a little, a slight chill on them, but I don't want it ice, you know, it's England.

Or is it, can my dream restaurant be anywhere I like?

Joe, what it can.

Okay, so maybe I'll have it a little colder then

because I think I'll have the restaurant.

Can I situate my restaurant to start off?

Yeah, for sure.

So I'm going to situate the restaurant on Pigeon Beach, which is in Antigua, which is where my family come from.

And it's where my cousin used to have a beach bar before one of the hurricanes got rid of that, sadly.

But she used to have this really fabulous fabulous beach bar and just ice-cold beer, brilliant barbecue.

So that's where we're starting off, gentlemen.

We're starting off on

Pigeon Point, it's called actually.

I'd love to go to Pigeon Point.

It's nice, it's nice.

Got a little jetty.

Why is it called Pigeon Point?

Is it because there's loads of pigeons there?

Like weird, like

accusatory pigeons pointing at you.

No,

there are no pigeons.

I've got no idea.

I don't think I've ever seen any pigeons in Antigua.

I don't know if we've got any.

Who knows?

Some weird English person probably called it that when they went there.

There's Nelson's Dockyard, there's English Harbour, and there's Pigeon Point.

So it feels a bit more than that.

Oh, so it was just

one person who'd been to Trafalgar Square then went over to Antigua.

Like, what am I going to call all this stuff?

This is called National Gallery Way.

Here we are on Big Lion Street.

So lovely.

We've got chilled, still water.

Pigeon Point Beach.

Also, should I have said still or sparkling water mummy?

No,

because that is a bit creepy.

Because you're not my mummy.

I mean, I'm not your mummy.

I know it sounds a bit creepy, Andy, and you've just said it sounds a bit creepy, but do bear in mind, I know James, and for every course from now on,

he will be saying one.

I will try not to, but it might be a slip of the tongue.

It might be a slip of the tongue, and you might not be able to help it.

Okay, fine.

Luckily, we're not in the same room, so I can avoid you being too weird.

No, luckily, we're not passing each other on a creepy service station on a creepy.

And you go, What's a dinner?

What water would you like, mummy?

But I think we can all agree the worst time to hear what's for dinner, mummy, from a stranger is on a creepy service station bridge.

Popped up, bread, mummy, popped up, bread.

Oh, I've got

ah poppa doms

pop a doms i think i like an i like a nice

because the problem with bread is that it's too delicious and you can eat too much before the dinner and then next thing you know you too full so poppadoms are great because you can you can have at them and they don't uh ruin the rest of your meal i love a pop-a-dom who doesn't want a nice snap yeah you know what i mean crack snap snap crackle pop whatever um i love i love a i love a poppa dom i like the ones with uh little caraway seeds in them and stuff

yummy scrummy yes please we'll have that and

and that means then i'm gonna have a little uh a little fresh mango chow which is like a caribbean version of a chutney like little pickle like mango with a little chili and a little fresh coriander with some lime on it I guess you don't also, if you're sitting on a beach in the Caribbean, the last thing you want is loads of bread, right?

You never feel like

it's not.

I don't know.

there's this, uh, they make this stuff.

There's a bread in the Caribbean called cocoa bread that I actually that it's just the most delicious bread, but it's hot just out of the oven.

Cocoa bread with just slathered in loads of butter.

I mean, you know, frankly, any hot bread slathered in loads of butter is generally a good thing in one's life, right?

Hot cocoa bread, just come out of the oven.

And there's another one that they make in Antigua, it's like a sweet bread that they plait.

Looks a bit like a hullah, you know, that Jewish hullah bread, uh, looks a bit like that, and it's slightly sweet like that.

It's what they call an enriched dough,

and uh, any of that hot and buttered is a great thing, but you literally, once you've eaten that, it's going to swell up inside, and there's no room for the other fabulous things.

So, we're going to stick with the poppadongs.

Well, also, if you're on that's what happens with pigeons, right?

You can't, if you feed them bread and then give them sparkling water, then they puff up and explode.

I thought you were going to say, if you eat too many pigeons, you can't eat the rest of your dinner, which is also true.

That's a problem, yeah, also true.

But then, and they're very, I don't like pigeon.

I have a question about cocoa bread, yeah, Ed, can you guess what my question is going to be about cocoa bread?

Is it chocolate?

Is it chocolate?

Is it a chocolate-based question, James?

Yes.

Yes.

No, it's not.

It hasn't got.

I think it's got coconut oil in it and maybe a little coconut milk.

Sorry to disappoint.

It's coconut rather than...

It's coconut rather than...

Yes, there's no A.

It's just cocoa, C-O-C-O.

Yeah.

You look very disappointed.

Yeah, you really just

have heartbroken.

Right, I was just thinking about how much, you know, just like the curse of the sweet-toothed fella such as myself is that we often get lured in by people saying coconut.

Cocoa, and it's not actually.

We haven't got to the end of the word yet then.

What were you imagining, James?

Are you imagining like a naan bread with cocoa popped in the middle?

Well, the word snap, crackle, and pop was used at one point.

It was to describe pop-adoms, but

it triggered you.

I was thinking, and maybe it's a bread where like the whole bread is like chocolate bread.

Or maybe it's a bread where there's pockets of like melted, molten chocolate within the bread.

Pano chocolate bit.

Yeah, something like that.

My mum used to make panel chocolates when we were kids.

And it was like her own version of it where they were just, it was so, there was so much butter in there.

But also the more that she made them.

the more chocolate went in there as well till it was like mainly chocolate really rather than pastry chocolate with a little bit of wheat or sort of floating around.

I'm not a massive chocolate individual.

Oh no.

No I'm not really that into it.

I'm not that into it.

I'm not that into it.

James always worries when people start talking about

them not enjoying sweet things because he loves sweet things so much and hates anyone who doesn't enjoy sweet things.

I can feel the antagonism beginning just as I said it.

The energy in the whole call changed slightly.

Okay, so I do like chocolate if it's been in the fridge for a start.

I completely agree with you.

All chocolate must be kept in the fridge.

You know, Kit Kat, bounty, snickers, whatever you are, get it in the fridge.

Don't give me warm chocolate because we will fall out.

Do you know what I mean?

Do you want some of this?

What?

Your soggy Kit Kat?

No, thanks.

Why would I want your sweaty Kit Kat?

No, get it in the fridge.

Get it in the fridge.

Out like a normal, proper person, for God's sake.

Sure.

Ever the freezer?

Yeah, sure.

We had some green and black almond chocolate that had been in the freezer the other day.

My daughter and I enjoyed a a couple of uh squares each.

I'm always in absolute awe of people who can do that, who can have a couple of squares and then wrap the packet up and put it back in the refrigerator.

Can I say it's a free square?

I would go for the whole bar.

It's the only thing I'm like that about.

I have no restraint in any other area of my life at all, whatsoever, ever, about anything.

I imagine it's quite easy for your daughter just to have a couple of squares because every time she asks you for a square, you make her.

Say, can I have some chocolate, mommy yeah

just the two squares

that'll do

my mum reminded me of something the other day that when I was younger and I was living with her obviously we were both like we both really like our food and stuff but we decided we should sort of start trying to eat less sweet things but she bought these mini lemon and white chocolate muffins from the supermarket that I like a mini thing yeah they were so delicious but we'd go through like a pack each

So, to stop us eating them, she came up with a great idea of putting them in the freezer because then when you want one, you just get one out, you defrost it, and then you eat it, and then you can't keep eating the whole packet because they're in the freezer.

And then, one night, we discovered they taste even better.

Really good frozen.

I was going to say, that sounds excellent, by the way.

So, we just sit in front of the TV ignoring rock-solid frozen muffins.

It's like a sort of ice cream muffin.

Yeah, it's perfect.

So nice.

Like a lolly and a cake all at once hello it's mum and i would say

i would say can we get the muffins from the freezer mummy

just you know what what's for dinner mummy was not creepy until i started talking to you too it was

you've ruined what's for dinner mummy for me you turned it into some like horrible creepy games

we do tend to do that for most of our guests

ruin something nice in their life and then send them on their way thank you so much i'm so glad I joined you.

I love the fact, Ed, in that story, that there was clearly a point where you got a muffin out to defrost it and you couldn't wait.

You couldn't wait until it defrosted.

And you wait in front of not knowing what it would taste like.

Thinking it would taste worse, but you did it anyway because you were so gay to eat it.

Yeah, I mean, that sums me up.

See, I'm so impatient with food and I get so hungry.

It's a wonder I hadn't tried that with chicken.

Oh, gosh.

Straight into a raw chicken breast.

I hate chicken breasts.

Oh, yeah?

Chicken breasts.

It's work of the devil.

It's just gross, isn't it?

It's dry, it's rubbish.

It's not, and your brothers are looking at me like we eat chicken breasts all the time.

No, I mean, I do, I do, but only if I'm like, I want like a light lunch or something.

It's there's no joy.

Chicken thighs, chicken thighs, chicken thighs.

If you're going to eat, it should be fun.

Thighs are the way to go.

You can take the bone out, get it on a griddle, take you a few minutes, it's cooked.

It's delicious.

I just think chicken breasts are like, they're too, there's too much of it for a start.

Why is it so big?

Yeah.

They're like giant things and they're all like cardboardy.

i mean even when i have them fancy it's still not my favorite thing i have it fancy and i think that's very well cooked and that's delicious and i'll you know hang down my adjudication so to speak uh but i'm in my head i'm thinking wish it was a thigh

where would you put wings in this league table you've got oh quite high up

quite high up

quite high up a wing is great because it's mainly fat

so it goes crispy and that's the thing it's the fat to meat ratio you see because fat

is where the flavour is carried.

So the less fat there is, the more chance there is for flavour.

So a wing, there's so much flavour potential all the time.

I make orange and ginger sticky chicken wings that are really great.

So I've got a little spice rub.

cook them in you know get them in the oven cook them quite slowly people cook wings too fast so they should they should not be sinewy they should be falling off the bone in my humble opinion well not very humble at all in my in my opinion.

Cook them slowly, let them be falling off the bone, and then at the end, I make an orange and ginger spice syrup.

And then you pour that over and then whack it back in the oven, and they go all sticky and gingery and really quite delicious.

So, yeah, wings are high, high up.

So, the more fat, the more flavour.

The better.

We were going to have it tattooed on our bums.

Fat is where the flavour is.

Fat is where the flavor is.

My favourite bit of the chicken is the

coincidentally, the arse.

Yes.

Yes.

That's my mother.

It's always a fight for the arse in our house.

How would you offer the chicken's ass to your mother?

Would you say...

Well, you have to be quick to offer it to her because

she's pretty hot off the blocks with the chicken arse.

What's the starter, mummy?

Oh, God.

Starter is going to be my favourite way to have an oyster.

So a raw oyster with the shallot vinegar, the you know, normal shallot vinegar, a little bit of Tabasco and then a bit of champagne poured into it.

Oh, it's and then you have it like a shot, a shot of that.

And I swear to you, it's one of the best.

It makes you tingle, it makes your toes tingle.

It's such a delicious, fabulous, invigorating, fantastic mouthful of joy.

I'd never heard of that before.

It's the most decadent sounding thing ever.

It's absolutely brilliant.

the first time i ever had it was the first time i ever had an oyster and i thought all oysters tasted like that until i had one without it and i was like that's revolting i was in uh i was in paris i was it's when i was in a band i started out when i was young i was in a i was in a group i was a singer and um we oh hello sam riches don't message me now i'm talking um and i was uh i was in this the record you know the record company always take you out for dinner after the gig or whatever we went to this uh restaurant in paris called la coupole it's this very famous beautiful fancy restaurant in the middle of Paris and they had these waiters flying around with these giant trays with that just looked amazing like with the underwear with a big cloche and I was like oh my god like what would you like and I was like one whatever that is I want that and they went it's oysters I was like oh shit because I'd never had an oyster because I was 17 and just just down from Suffolk like and I thought no I'm gonna do it and one of the guys from the record company did that to the oyster put the Tabasco champagne and the shallot vinegar in it and gave it to me and I was like oh my god I'm never eating anything else ever again as long as I live.

Is this a natural thing that people do or is it just that one guy from the record company?

Do you know what?

I don't know but I do it all the time.

Have you ever seen anyone else do it?

No.

I've seen them do it with Tabasco or with the shallot, but not all three at the same time.

Honestly, all three at the same time.

It's a game changer, people.

It's a game changer.

Would you promise both with both of you promise me to do it?

Do it.

Please do it.

There's There's no way I'm not doing that.

As soon as you said it, I thought to myself, I'm doing that.

Yeah.

There's no way I wasn't going to do that.

I've just ordered all the ingredients online while we were talking.

Yeah, yeah.

I mean, I'm definitely curious,

as I saw that Ed was, as to the origins of it, because, like, if it is just that guy, I want to know more about that guy.

That guy.

Because it's this radio exec guy who I also,

because of how decadent he is, I'm imagining him putting all this together, but also like holding a gun or something in in his hand.

Yeah, or like, just like being,

he's got like a pet tiger who's bigger or something like that.

This guy, he was, he was very French.

Jacuzzi and a Rolls-Royce.

Yeah.

Jacuzzi and a Rolls-Royce.

Wow.

That just all sounds so tacky and awful.

Yeah, yeah.

No, he wasn't awful.

He was just French.

There's a Twitter account.

that tweets quotes from this podcast out of context.

And

I think he wasn't awful, he he was just French is going to be in there straight away.

Oh yeah.

I mean but the person who runs that account will get around to that quote once they've finished up typing.

She's always hot as the blocks with a chicken ars.

So

once that's been sent out into the world, the phenomenal yeah the priorities

straight it's the hot as a block with a chicken test.

What was your band called?

Rip Rig and Panic.

Me and Nana Cherry were the singers and my brother was the bass player and we had the best time ever.

I mean, you know, we were teenagers.

There's nothing like touring all over the world with your mates, getting drunk, singing songs.

You're on the young ones as well, weren't you?

I am on the young ones.

I'm so young on the young ones that I look like a hamster.

My cheese.

I saw it the other day.

I'm literally 17 years old.

I'm like, oh!

Little squeaky hamster girl jumping around.

I was like, oh my god, bless our heart.

That oyster and champagne is the kind of thing that, you know I can't I can't really decide which character of the young ones might eat that just casually but like I can imagine one of the young ones just eating that

you know you know you know when he did the weird one that nobody can ever remember the name the kind of American guy with the black hair yeah Mike Mike

he would have it wouldn't he the others would be too scared it's the sort of thing Rick would say

the everyday

people that people are eating he'd be like they're down there eating your oysters and champagne yeah

What's the main course, mummy?

Right.

I think we're going to go with.

I'm...

Just before

Christmas, I went to Morocco with Fred Syriac, who is, you know, Fred from First Aids, lovely French Fred.

He does a show called Remarkable Places to Eat.

And different chefs and cooks take him to their favorite places to eat.

And I took him to Marrakech and we went to a restaurant called Al Fasia

which is in the middle there's two of them actually in the middle of Marrakech and we went we actually got to go into the kitchen which to me was absolute heaven it's run by Moroccan women which is quite unusual because a lot you know women don't really have their own businesses as such in Morocco very often but these two sisters their dad set them up

they grew up in hotels he set them up this is a very long story to tell you about my main course but anyway, he set them up in their own restaurant.

They've had it for about 35 years.

It's one of the most popular restaurants in Morocco.

And they make a lamb, a slow-cooked lamb dish.

It takes 24 hours to make.

And it is one of the most incredible things I've ever eaten in my life.

And it's one of those things you tell people about, and they go, Yeah, yeah, how great could it possibly be?

And then they eat it, and then the tears come to their eyes because it's so delicious.

And the ladies in the kitchen showed me how to make it.

So they poach it in sort of saffron and turmeric and ginger and onions and garlic and all sorts of other delicious spices for about eight, nine hours until it's really, really tender.

Then they take it out and they lay all these lamb shoulders on a big tray.

And then the magical bit is they, well, the other magical bit is then they bathe it in a mixture of melted butter and olive oil and then they put it in the oven and the outside goes really really really crispy and the inside is this succulent, mouth-watering, delicious,

just heavenly, heavenly thing, honestly.

You can cut it with a spoon.

It's just incredible.

So I think we'll be having that.

Oh, yeah.

And now you've said that, I don't know why anyone's ever picked anything different to that.

It's the bet, honestly.

It's absolutely.

And they've got perfect.

I went to the spice market with her as well, which was a revelation.

And I've been to the spice market before, but in Morocco, but I've been on my own.

I'd never been with a Moroccan person.

And she took me deep into the spice market.

And, you know, here, when you have a restaurant, you order your spices, and when they run out, you order the next lot.

There, they go and get their spices ground fresh every morning.

So they go to the market in the morning and they pick what they need for the day.

And then he grinds them through this machine and gives you bags of stuff.

And when I told her that people have but you know, tubs of cardamom or turmeric that have been there or cubin in the back of their cupboard for like a couple of years, she was like, Oh my god,

what is the matter with you, disgusting people?

I was like, I've really, I'd like to apologise on behalf of all of England.

I'm really, really sorry.

Andy, I know you're worried that that was quite a long story, but that will never be the longest story about a slow-cooked lamb we've had on this podcast.

There was a previous episode with Joe Thomas where he told a 25-minute story about how they tried to bury a lamb and cook it, and it didn't work.

So I don't need to worry about that.

I've done that with a whole salmon before, and it did work.

It was lovely.

But that's another stuff.

She buried it,

yeah.

She wrapped it in cling film and newspaper in Sweden, stuffed it with loads of dill.

In fact, Nana's mother stuffed it with loads of dill and spring onions and gorgeous and juniper, wrapped it in cling film, wrapped it in newspaper, wrapped it again, buried it in the garden.

We went back the next day, and it was absolutely amazing.

Had that lady who buried the salmon seen the TV show Willie's Perfect Chocolate Christmas?

No, I don't.

Why does he do that?

Does Willie do that on that?

I know him.

You know Willie?

Yeah.

Andy this is this is huge for the podcast

this is absolutely incredible I'm so glad I brought up the Joe Thomas episode and and you know what just now when I said Sam Richards don't text me now because I'm busy she's the woman who made

Willie's perfect chocolate

she's the producer of that program

what this is

this is perfect

Because that was me in my head going, I'm going to ask if someone saw Willie's Perfect Chocolate Christmas.

That's really going to throw Andy.

And you were like, oh, no, she didn't see that.

But the producer just messaged me.

And I know Willie.

And I know Willie.

He's lovely.

His chocolate.

That's some really good chocolate he makes.

Right.

Did he bury something in that?

I don't remember that.

What did he bury?

He buried a lamb, apparently.

How many Joe Thomas?

He buried a lamb in Willie's Perfect Chocolate Christmas.

Will you only hang out with Willie if he's been in the fridge?

No, because I'm not liable to try to snap him and eat a bit off.

So many questions right now.

Yeah.

What is Willie like and how did you meet him?

Do you know what?

I actually, the first time I tried to meet him, I tried to meet him in Thailand because somebody said I was going to Thailand on my own.

They said, my mate, Will's there, you have to go and say hi to him.

And I got there and he'd already left.

And I was like, oh, that's a shame.

So I missed him.

And then when I came back to England, Sam, about two years later, was making this TV show, Willie's.

What's the whole series?

What was it called?

There was a whole series.

Well, I can't remember, Willie's something.

And

said, oh, you must come and meet Will because you guys are going to get on like a house on fire.

Was I in one?

I might, I can't remember whether we were in it or whether I just met him down there.

But so I met him down at his farm place with all his millions of children and his lovely wife.

And then occasionally I would see him in the Portobello Road.

Right.

Before the Portobello Road got really crap and boring.

And what kind of a guy is he?

What's his vibe?

He's lovely.

Quite posh, very nice.

He's good.

He's funny.

He's really into what he does.

He's really like, you know, he's one of...

Because to do that, obviously, to suddenly start doing a sort of making a Peruvian chocolate business, you've got to be fairly obsessive.

So he's fairly obsessive about it, because he has to be.

But he makes a really brilliant thing.

And I love it when people are like that, when they're just one thing is their life.

And that's what they're, you know, sort of their main focus is children and the chocolate.

I think that's going to solve so many, so many mysteries and questions on the podcast.

You should get him on.

Yeah, we should.

Do you want me to do that?

We should absolutely get in Willie's contact details

after this episode, and we're going to try and get him on.

You should get him on.

We need to have Willie on.

What do you think Willie would think if we told him that once upon a time

one of the cast members from the In-Betweeners

and his friend's dad, who he had befriended at that point, copied everything that Willie did and buried a lamb and took like a whole weekend over it

only for it to not work.

How do you think Willie would feel?

I think he would feel sad for them.

I feel sad for them because that's a lot of effort, isn't it?

That's a lot of effort.

And there's nothing like I may, you know, there's nothing worse than a kitchen disappointment.

And I'm sure that, you know, a dugout hole with a whole lamb in it is even worse than, you know, your duck going a bit wrong.

Yeah, it's even, I think it's even worse than a kitchen disaster because they dug up the garden, Soft Touch's Garden.

Yeah, they dug up Soft Touch's Garden.

Who is Soft Touch?

Yeah, Soft Touch is one of the local mums who was

because she let them use their garden.

Oh, she let you do anything you like.

So should they call her Soft Touch?

That's really mean.

That's really mean.

They could have just called her kind ladies.

Yeah, yeah.

She really is.

Soft Touch.

It's like, oh, God, what a a wally she is.

Being nice to everybody,

letting them do stuff.

And that does sound very sad.

She also might have just thought that she'd get some nice lamb at the end of it.

I mean, I personally would be really upset if someone had buried a whole lamb in my garden and then it didn't work.

I can't really get over the fact that you know Willie.

No Willie.

And that during the episode, Eastern Willie's Perfect Chocolate Christmas sent you a message.

Sent you a message.

She's

asking me when my pop-up is going to be.

I'll tell you later, babe.

Do you know when the pop-up's going to be?

Yes, it's in when is it?

It's on the 20th of August.

Me and Fred, who I've just are doing a pop-up together.

Oh, amazing.

Yeah, we're doing

car because I've got a thing called Wadadley Kitchen, which is Caribbean barbecue, which I love doing.

I'm just really into it.

And Fred came down and he loved it.

So he said, let's do it.

Let's put them together.

So we're doing Andy's Wadadley Kitchen.

Meets Fred Siri X.

It's called One Love.

And Fred, he sent me his number.

When he said said his number, and it came up on my phone as Fred Dredd, right?

He's really into Jamaica, Fred.

I'm not Jamaican.

I have to keep telling him this.

I'm like, you do know there's more than one, you do know there's more than one island, right, Fred?

And he goes, he goes, no, no, there's one.

Jamaica, me love it, beloved.

That's how he talks to me all the time.

That's how he talks to me all the time.

I mean,

they must edit those bits out of first dates.

Well, yes, I don't think he speaks to everybody like that.

He speaks to me like that.

And then he also dances, which is terrible.

I've told him on television that he mustn't dance.

It's just awful.

He's lovely, but he's a terrible dancer.

Is it too late to change the name of the pop-up to me love it?

Me love it.

I think it's the tagline.

It's

me love it.

Fred Dread.

It's

Also, I have to ask, you're doing a pop-up with a French gentleman.

Are the oysters going to be on the menu?

No, not really.

No, because it's just too much.

That's what you call a longting.

Do you know what I mean?

It's not really the mood of

the event.

We're more a kind of casual dining area.

It's kind of Caribbean barbecue.

There's some saucy song on there

with fig and a little, we've made a little gherkin roast.

And dad's Fred's chips.

Now, this is really making me laugh.

He keeps keeps going on about his dad's chips, and he's just really loves his dad.

His dad is a glorious man, and he keeps going, they're so special.

And I'm like, Why are they so special, Fred?

And he goes, Well, he takes the potato, he peels them, he cuts them, and then he fries them.

I'm like, I like, so chips, then, yeah,

and he's like, But they're amazing because they're a bit bendy and they're not too crispy.

I'm like, Yeah, chips,

just chips, babe, honestly.

He's one of the loveliest people in the world.

He just makes me laugh so much.

I now feel like we have to get you back on, but with this whole ensemble of

the chicken ass, obviously.

I'm not sure your daughter would want to come on this podcast because I did House of Games, the Richard Osmond show with Mikita.

Oh, did you?

And she was very enthusiastic at the beginning of the day.

She was so excited, and she obviously watched the show and she couldn't wait.

And you could see she was being a bit competitive.

And then,

yeah, just a bit in no uncertain terms.

In the first episode, I absolutely thrashed everyone and she completely lost her head.

I destroyed your daughter.

Did you stop speaking to you?

She really lost it.

I think she lost a bit of enthusiasm for it after that because I really got into her head and I absolutely annihilated her.

Oh my god, that's the worst thing ever.

She hates losing anything.

I was on that House of Games as well, and I was really rubbish at it.

Comedians are really good at it.

What is that?

I think it's rigged.

It's because

the puzzles are just the way that comedians think anyway.

So it's unfair.

Yeah.

So all the puzzles are geared towards the way comedians' minds work because we're always thinking about jokes and like wordplay and stuff like that.

So it's all based around that.

It's not actual, you know, general knowledge or things.

Like when I did it, there was a round where we had to just name where things were on in the uk i

i i was so bad at it yeah i was bad at that one too i was awful at stuff that required actual knowledge and then when it was just like smashed two words together i was running rings around a lot of them the only the only one i got of that was keisha lauren kelly

What is for your side dish, mummy?

Right.

Now, I'm put for my side dish, I'm putting one of my dishes on because it's my favourite side dish at the moment, right?

So, it's barbecued.

I love sweet corn in all its forms.

I like it pureed.

I like sweet corn pudding.

Sweet corn pudding is a close second, actually, which is like a southern American kind of sweet corn custard thing that they make with soul food that's really delicious.

So, that's definitely a close second.

But I think we're going to have my Wadagli corn.

So, it's you, you, you, you, you poach it in uh stock with lots of lovely herbs, and then we put it on the barbecue and really char it.

And then we make a mix of coconut milk,

butter,

lime and chili and sort of reduce that down.

You pour that over the corn and then you put toasted coconut and shallots and a little salt on the top and it's just absolutely fucking gorgeous.

It's like yummy, it's got a really good texture and then it's a little bit sort of buttery and silky at the same time and that with that lovely falling apart spoonable lamb i think is a really fantastic situation do you not agree yes well absolutely agree i also think that i'd i'd like to open a restaurant called spoonable lamb yeah

spoonable lamb spoonable lamb where you go down the spoonable yeah

when did you start cooking this side dish and how has it evolved over the years i actually i only invented it last last year.

I invented, I've been barbecuing corn for years, obviously, but I was like, we need to up this corn's game a little bit and I just started thinking about what we could pour over it and I just had a moment of blinding inspiration and it just worked.

I think the shallots were added halfway through because we had toasted coconut on and I thought it was slightly granular and then when you add those, I love those crispy, you know, you can actually just buy tubs of crispy shallots and crispy garlic.

Yeah, yeah, I love it.

And you can't make them like that, taste like that at home, no matter what you do, you can't make them taste like that in a restaurant.

They're obviously injected with some sort of wizardry.

And so I just happened to have some of those and I sprinkled them on as well.

And, you know, Robert's your mother's brother.

It was perfect.

I just bought a big bag of like deep-fried onions, basically.

Yeah, a huge sack of them.

So good.

Yeah, man.

Where else?

You can't do that yourself.

And I'll be honest, the other night I just got the bag out of the cupboard and just poured some into my mouth.

Do you know where they're all so good?

In a cheese toasty?

Put them in a toasty.

I bet.

I'll try putting them in the freezer, but I'll probably enjoy that more.

Yeah.

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What's for your drink, mummy?

Well, we are

funny, mummy, it's enormous.

It's creepy every time.

Oh, yeah, no, it certainly gets creepier every time as well.

Every time, because he's getting more into it the more he says it, isn't it?

I'm getting more used to it.

That time, I didn't even even think about it.

Just said it.

Right, so we're on pigeon point, we're in Antigua.

Antigua, in my opinion, makes the best rum in the world.

It's an amber-coloured rum.

So, uh, and you know, Caribbean people are very particular about the kind of rum that we like.

You know, I say we, obviously, I'm from Suffolk, but you know, I'm saying tell that to Fred.

I do keep trying to explain to him that I'm not actually a dread as well.

He's like, I'm like, you're more of a dread than I am, Fred.

All right.

So there are two types of Antiguan rum.

One is called Cavalier and the other one is called English Harbour.

So either Cavalier or English Harbour, they're both, they're amber, they're very honeyed, slightly apricotty kind of delicious rums.

So I would have either of those

with a very nice slice of lime, not too big a slice of lime.

I only like one ice cube in my drinks right I actually ask because otherwise it's too much and then it melts and the drink goes all watery do you understand completely scraps like don't be what also don't try trick me by putting 43 ice cubes and then a half an inch of rum I'm not stupid so run

a slice of lime two one perhaps two ice cubes and ginger ale not beer ginger ale is my favourite beverage alcoholic beverage actually one well i say i say my favourite one of my favourite alcoholic beverages.

James, do you like rum?

Because I'm assuming that you like rum because it's the closest you can get to like a spirit and a pudding in one.

Sure.

I like good rum.

It's one of the drinks where one night I got way too drunk.

One night I invented a drink on New Year's Eve.

Oh, yeah.

And, well, I say I invented a drink on New Year's Eve.

I put loads of rum and Dr.

Pepper together.

Oh,

that sounds like it might be quite nice.

So spiced rum and Dr.

Pepper, I call them spicy peppers.

It was all I was drinking all night and I've never been so sick.

And it was like, and it was very, very embarrassing because it was my first New Year's Eve with my girlfriend at the time.

And I drank all the

spicy peppers at my friend's house.

And then we went to her friend's house to actually see in the New Year's.

He was sick.

And that's where, yeah, that's I

suddenly went from feeling completely fine to feeling the worst I've ever felt.

Sick in the toilet, sick in his doorstep on the way out.

Oh, God.

As well.

So, like, don't.

Oh, mate.

So, back to the.

Was it a new relationship?

No, actually, not that.

It was like halfway through a one-year relationship.

So, that was the beginning of the end.

Absolutely, absolutely.

It was your first and last New Year's together, right?

It was, yeah, yeah, our only New Year's together.

Thank you very much.

Now, is Dr.

Pepper's root beer?

No.

It's a bit like root beer, isn't it?

Do you know what else you can do with it?

Can I tell you something you can do with it that's really, really good?

Is you can braise onions in root beer or Dr.

Pepper and it's absolutely and butter.

So if you slice them really, really, really thinly and sweat them off caramelize and really, really taint it with loads and loads of butter and then add root beer gradually and then in the end you get the most incredible onions in the world.

Whack them on some lamb chops, boys.

Also, that's that's a probably a safer option on New Year's if you just take a bottle of onions around with you.

Sure, but then I'd have to commit myself to walking around eating onions at every party.

Not a foolproof suggestion.

I'm just saying, especially when it gets to the New Year's kiss.

Yeah, you might be a bit gross, you might be a bit gross, onion-y boy, but he's don't worry, he's Benjamin Dr.

Pepper, he's a proper apple.

Yeah,

he's walking around calling himself Dr.

Onion.

Honestly, do do that to your onions and you'll be really happy that you did.

No, I will do that.

I'm going to try.

There's a lot of things I'm going to try off the back of this episode.

I'm doing that corn on the barbecue next week.

I've decided.

Do the corn on the barbecue.

This guy loves barbecues.

Oh, lovely.

Do you?

You've got to come down to my barbecue then?

Happily.

I've got five barbecues because they gave me loads.

They gave me loads of barbecues.

This Weber barbecues gave me loads of barbecues because they're lovely and because they wanted me to use them at their thing.

It's fabulous.

They're like really fancy.

Honestly, I've never been this fancy in my life.

It's really, it's like a whole new phase of living.

I'm 57 and

I'm really impressed with myself at this

point.

It's the first time I've ever been really impressed with myself because I've got five barbecues.

Well, I mean, that's impressive.

It is, isn't it?

It's objectively impressive.

If you are going to invite Ed round, though, don't do it when Makita's over because

she hates him.

She'll stab him with a barbecue fork, won't you?

Yeah, yeah.

She'll be pressing his face into the grill while you shout Tisha and Kelly at the top of your voice.

Tisha Ray Kelly, you bastard!

You comedy bastard!

Take that!

You comedy bastard!

Take that, you comedy bastard!

Have an unfair advantage on House of Games.

Annihilate my daughter i'll see i'll show you

can't believe you fell for this trick nobody's got five barbecues you fucking idiot

he gave mad he actually believed we had five of them

i bought uh i bought a barbecue at the beginning of lockdown and bought a big ceramic barbecue called a camado joe

and we'd been barbecuing a lot i'd say uh peak was like four or five times a week

and i thought i'm so cool i'm barbecuing all the time.

How great.

And then my fiancé took a picture of me standing at the barbecue drinking a beer while I was cooking meat.

And it's the saddest, most loneliest picture I've ever seen.

It's sad that you realize you've become that guy.

Yeah, it just represents sort of sad modern man.

Madden man staring into a fire.

With a sausage.

Yeah.

What do you barbecue, Ed?

Talk to me about yourself.

All sorts of things.

It's quite a good barbecue because you can set it up for like indirect cooking as well.

So I did some, I smoked smoked some lamb ribs on there.

I think that was my

triumph.

And next week I'm going to do, I'm going to smoke beef feather blade for like

seven or eight hours.

Yeah.

You're really, you're fancy.

You're quite fancy yourself then, Matey.

Well, in my head, I'm fancy and then I'll mess it up.

I'm also on Monday.

This shows you how busy I am, Andy.

I've set aside Monday to make pickles.

That's the kind of shit I do.

You're my new best friend.

You're my new best friend.

Can I call you up and talk to you about weird shit like

that?

Anytime you want, I don't have a lock on.

Nobody in my family will talk to me about these things anymore.

They're just like, Andy, shut up.

Nobody cares.

I'm like, look what I've done to the cherries.

They're like, we don't care.

I pickled cherries last night.

Nobody would talk to me.

Oh, nice.

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As we come to the end of the episode.

Yeah.

What's a pudding, mummy?

That's the creepiest one.

Normally I say dessert, but I thought it'd be creepier to say pudding.

You're right it is

now this dessert doesn't really make sense with the rest of the meal or where we are but i'm gonna say it because it's my favorite

suet puddings to me are the work of the gods it's it's uh it's ambrosia from god you know it's the one of the best things in the world so i'm gonna say uh spotted dick and custard because I

you know you never get it anymore.

When do you ever get spotty dick anymore?

Nobody makes spotty dick.

I'm gonna make I made one in lockdown, actually,

because I was just lying around bored one day, obviously, when I wasn't making What's With Dinner Mummy.

And

so I made Spotty Dick and I brought it back.

I'm bringing back Spotty Dick and Custard.

Spotted Dick and Custard, the best thing at school was school.

Everybody always goes, eh, school puddings.

I'm like, I love school puddings.

There's the best day part of my day at school was school pudding.

Spotty Dick, all jam roly-poly, of course.

And also, I don't even mind if the custard is tinned.

I like tinned custard.

I think tinned custard is perfect consistency.

All that fancy stuff's a bit thin, isn't it?

Yeah, I know you are.

I want proper custard.

And do you remember that you used to be able to get those lovely tins of pudding, Spotty Dick or Jam, not jam ready pudding, treacle pudding, those hinds.

They seem to, they don't sell them anymore because I like them when I'm hungover.

And I have been hunting for them at the odd hungover day.

And they seem to have, it's all gone fancy.

And it's all in the face.

I don't want it out of the chilled display counter.

I want it in a tin next to the Frey Bentos, thank you very much, where a pudding's meant to reside.

And I think I just wanted, if Heinz, if you're listening, stop mucking around and get them back out.

I also used to love school dinner puddings.

Yeah.

And James knows that I used to eat a lot of school dinners, even though I also used to take a packed lunch.

I used to eat that in morning break and then have school lunch for lunch.

God.

What we also used to do at the end of school lunch is

there was at the end of the salad bit at the school lunch, there was a big bowl of Dairy Lee triangles that you could, if you wanted a cold lunch, you get the salad and Dairy Lee triangles.

When the dinner ladies weren't looking, we used to get as many Dairy Lee triangles as we could and put them in our pockets and then leave lunch and go and challenge ourselves to see how many we could fit in our mouths.

Oh my,

what a greedy child.

It's gross, right?

Yeah, yeah, really gross.

You know,

it's

gross.

It's undeniably gross.

Undeniably gross.

When Wikita was,

do you remember the kids at school when you went on a school trip that never had enough packed lunch?

And that used to always really worry me because I just, you know, I'd like to feed people.

So whenever Makita went on a school trip, she'd take enough food for three children.

She'd like, because I would like,

literally, I'd make her a lunch and then I'd give her a couple of extras just so that if there were any hungry kids on the coach, she could share it out.

She'd be like, Mum, why have I got 59 egg mayonnaise sandwiches i'm like some of the other kids might need a sandwich share it out share it out that's really nice of you but if i was your son i would have eaten that before i got to the bus

awful child awful greedy child kids are weird with food i remember i'd never forget this i'd lived with someone at university and he went to school with a boy who every lunchtime used to put all baked beans right in his pocket

what he used to put baked beans in his pocket before he left and then just eat the beans for the rest of the day out his pocket oh Oh, God.

The first time I ever heard about Spotted Dick was in the John Goodman film King Ralph.

Oh yeah.

What?

That was the first time you heard about Spotted Dick.

Yeah, so I didn't know about it as a dessert.

My school

didn't do that.

Chocolate pudding.

Yeah, I don't think we even had school dinners at my school.

And so like, I just had never heard of it before.

And I was watching the movie King Ralph.

And he sits there and he says, what's the dessert?

And they say, Spotted Dick.

And then he gets confused because obviously it sounds American food

yeah

and but me as a child I was on the same page as him so I wasn't like that's that's a funny joke I was like what

and it was it was not it was not funny like that sounds horrible what are rich people eating they're being dominating us all rich eating our dicks now

it's a pudding of kings though it's a brilliant thing but a good spotted dick should be light, but also rich and a bit, you know, the fruit should be plump.

Oh, it's just the best spotted.

I'm not sure if I was on a beach in the Caribbean, I'd want to eat spotted dick first and then go in for a spot.

No, I know, I know, I know it's not geographically correct as a pudding, but I like it too much to forego it in this particular scenario.

If I actually was on the beach, I probably wouldn't want to eat it, but as it's sort of my mythology and my world that we're creating, which I like, by the way,

then we're having it, and that's that.

Would you...

If you were at Pigeon Point and you were having spotted ticket and custard, would you whack a pineapple ring on there?

No,

because that would be gross.

I really like pineapple rings and custard.

I really love pineapple rings.

I like tinned peaches and

evaporated milk.

Some things are good out of a tin.

Sweet corn is one of them.

Peaches are another.

I really want some pineapple and custard now.

Well, you can have it.

You're a grown-up now.

You could go to the shop and you can have it, James.

These are the instincts we actually need to stop James indulging in because out of anyone I know, the person who's realised that they're an adult and they can buy whatever they want is James.

It's James.

He's like just literally going, I'm an adult now, but he still has the same taste as he did when he was a child.

So he just buys loads of sweets the whole time.

It's the dream.

You know how it's so sad you hear so many kids who that they say, when I'm a grown-up, I'm going to spend all my money on this.

And then we all grow up and we don't do it.

Not me.

When I was a kid, I really wanted a room that was all mattress, all over the floors, and all over there was a bed.

And then I realized as an adult that I was actually describing a banded cell.

I was like, it'd be really great if the whole room was just a big bed and everything you could bounce off the sides.

And then I was like, oh my God, that's actually just a bad cell.

Yeah, and then

when you go to bed, you get these pajamas that all tie up around the back.

You know, snug.

All

snug as a bug in a rug.

Yeah.

Then the menu.

I'm going to read your order back to you now and see how you feel about it.

I think you feel pretty good about it.

You seem pretty confident.

You would like still chilled water to start.

This all takes place in pigeon point, remember?

Yes.

You would like poppadoms with the caraway seeds in it, did you say?

Yes, I like the caraway seeds in it, yep.

And what dip did you say?

I'm going to make a we're going to have a mango chow on the side, which is like a little mango Caribbean pickled thing.

Starter, raw oyster with shallot vinegar, Tabasco and champagne made by a record exec from Paris.

No,

he doesn't have to be there.

Ticket to Pigeon Point and Marshall.

Remember, he's not a bad guy, he's just French.

Yeah.

There he is.

Main course, spoonable lamb

from Marrakesh.

Yep.

Side dish.

Your own home-cooked barbecue corn with toasted coconut and crispy shallots.

Yeah.

Drink, Cavalier or English harbour amber rum with a slice of lime, one or two ice cubes at a push and some ginger ale.

Yeah.

Dessert, spotted dick and tinned custard.

I mean that does come out of nowhere at the end.

You're absolutely right.

I know.

I feel like it should be like a coconut pannicotta with a sort of little mango syrup, but I'd be lying.

Yeah,

you've got to live your truth.

I'm living my truth.

I'm living my truth.

But yeah, tinned custard and spotted dick.

I'm very happy with this.

That is a very, very good menu.

It's been such a pleasure.

So many revelations throughout this episode.

We're trying to form our sort of own Marvel universe, and

Willie's been in some post-credit sequences, and I'm so glad he's finally entering the universe properly.

I can't believe this has happened.

Thank you so much, Andy.

That was awesome.

You're so welcome.

You're so welcome, Andrew.

There we have it.

Andy Oliver, what a wonderful episode.

What a wonderful menu.

And great chat.

Thank you, Mummy.

A joy.

Thank you so much, Mummy.

What a great menu.

And thank you so much for not mentioning tinned salmon.

Yes, thank you.

I mean, there was no chance she was going to mention tinned salmon.

Although she did talk about some things being better in tins.

Tinned custard.

So I was worried when we were floating around there.

I was like, uh-oh, because she said corn, she said custard, she said puddings.

A lot of them are better in tins, but not salmon.

She agrees with us, not salmon.

Thank you, Andy Oliver.

If you want to go to her pop-up, it's starting on the 20th of August.

It's called Andy Oliver's With Daddy Kitchen.

It's at the Crooked Billet in Clapton.

Hit up Google for more deets.

Me love it.

Yeah.

And Andy's definitely going to be there as well.

I will be there.

If you want to see me in real life, I'm going to be there for sure, chatting pickles with Andy.

So do wave if you see me, but don't come near me.

There's a pandemic.

And also, I don't like you.

Yep.

Remember that.

Never forget.

So, remember, merch as well.

Get some merch.

Off manypodcast.co.uk.

We're very proud of it.

It is available to purchase.

Also, on that website.

Also, on that website, there's loads of restaurants.

Every restaurant that gets mentioned on the podcast is listed on the website.

You can go on there and there's little handy links if you want to check any of those restaurants out once we're out of this goddamn mess.

Nice to finally have a restaurant to add to the Morocco section of the restaurants because that was looking a little bare.

For all our Moroccan listeners, you know where to go and get lamb you can eat with a spoon.

I'm going to travel there.

Whenever that is possible again, I am traveling to there.

I'm going to Marrakesh.

I'm getting some spoonable lamb.

Oh,

all I want to do is spoon lamb into my mouth now.

Check out the socials as well at Off Menu Official, Instagram and Twitter.

Also, Ed and I have music podcasts.

Lifeless with Ed Gamble.

Perfect Sounds with James Acaster.

Leave a five-star review for this podcast if you're an Apple podcaster.

And that's about it, really.

Give us a like.

Don't know what that means.

And tweet Willie and tell him we want him on this pod.

Tweet Willie from Willie's Perfect Chocolate Christmas.

Don't just tweet the word Willie because

that will not come across well.

No, but anyone who you think might be Willie.

Doesn't matter if you can't remember the surname.

Just tweet them and tell them they should come on the podcast.

Well,

Willie Nelson, I would love on this podcast.

I wouldn't turn down Willie Nelson, Will Smith, Big Willie Star, I suppose.

Big Willie style, Big Willie's Perfect Chocolate Christmas.

Maybe Big Willie Star was about Willie's Perfect Chocolate Christmas,

and we never knew.

Yeah, Just the Two of Us is about Joe Thomas and the dad cooking the lap.

Yeah, that's what it is.

Yeah, that's almost a whole verse about soft touch in it.

Yeah.

Thank you very much for listening to the podcast.

As always, we will see you again next week.

Bye.

Could pick up that fork

Hello there listeners.

Can we recommend you a new podcast?

It's been going for three years, but it'll be new if you listen to it now.

My name's Stevie.

My name's Dessa.

And we host the Nobody Panic podcast, which is all about how to be a functioning adult without consistently screaming and or crying all the time.

Although crying is okay, crying is good.

Listen to our episode on how to cry at work.

It's all kinds of different how-tos from how to be creative to how to concentrate to how to begin a small talk.

Thank you, Stevie.

We bring our experience, which is sort of minor, and then we get experts in to really give the advice.

We release podcasts every Tuesday, it's on Apple Podcasts, ACAS, Spotify, basically wherever you get your podcasts, we're there.

We're there.

We're ready to impart not our advice necessarily, but the advice of others to help you get through your day and your life.

Are we selling it yet?

I'd like to say that we're much better in the podcast than we are on this advert.

Please do come over and check what we're like on the real thing.

Oh, yeah.

You'll be pleasantly surprised.

Oh, hello, it's Amy Gladhill here.

Hello, I'm Harriet Kemsley.

Single ladies, it's coming to London.

Well, we're already in London, I suppose, in a way.

But we're doing a live show, aren't we?

It's true on Saturday, the 13th of September at 7pm at King's Place.

So we've got your Saturday night sorted.

We've done all the organising for you.

Come along, have some drinks, alcoholic or non-alcoholic, both are available.

And you can get your tickets from plursive.co.uk.

Or just head to the link in our Instagram bio and just clickety click click.

London, we're coming.