Overtime - Episode #376 (Originally aired 2/5/16)

Charlie Sheen is an icon of decadence.

I lit the fuse and my life turns into everything it wasn't supposed to be.

He's going the distance.

He was the highest paid TV star of all time.

When it started to change, it was quick.

He kept saying, no, no, no, I'm in the hospital now, but next week I'll be ready for the show.

Now, Charlie's sober.

He's gonna tell you the truth.

How do I present this with any class?

I think we're past that, Charlie.

We're past that, yeah.

Somebody call action.

Aka Charlie Sheen, only on Netflix, September 10th.

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be.

Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Night Series, Real Time with Bill Maher.

Okay, here we are.

I'm sorry, I was just a little overclamped at seeing two icons together.

I am so knocked out to be able to meet her.

She is such a hero to me.

It's a pleasure to meet you.

You've been awesome for all of us.

Thank you.

Start making out, you two.

So bad.

So bad.

Boy, you want to watch?

I said to myself, it's a beautiful moment.

Let's ruin it.

P.J.

O'Rourke, why are there so few mainstream conservative comedians?

Oh, it's so true.

You're the only one who can make that shit funny.

It seemed funny to us.

There are a lot of mainstream

conservative comedians.

It's just not on purpose.

Right.

And

Ted Cruz.

You mess me up.

You just don't have the material to work with.

I'm sorry.

There is no Sarah Palin

for you guys on the left.

No.

You know, I mean, you can try to make an equivalency with Nancy Pelosi.

It just doesn't work.

You may not like Nancy Pelosi, but she's bright.

It's more that we lack the Tina Fey than we lack the.

But no, I say that, I think we have proven over and over again to be hilarious, and just watch Ted Cruz in action.

I don't really see how you could be much funnier than that.

Okay.

Gloria, is the Equal Rights Amendment still worth fighting for?

Oh, I forgot all about that.

What year were they trying to pass that?

It's coming coming back.

78.

Yeah, it's coming back if there's a big populist movement for it because I think that we've realized, looking at, say, the Walmart suit, which was a huge, the biggest sex discrimination suit ever, that we lost it because we couldn't prove state of mind, you know, hello, you know, not because there wasn't discrimination.

If we had the Equal Rights Amendment, we would have won it.

You know, it would be nice to have women in the Constitution, sort of.

Right.

Amen.

Armstrong Williams where does the Ben Carson campaign go from here I saw a headline today it said it was circling the drain

I'm just saying I just saw that don't believe everything you read I know but he did fire people today he needed to okay and and cuts out sometimes we need to fire and cuts out yes of course you understand that well that that's part of that's part of corporate discipline corporate you've got to cut the infrastructure especially when you leave Iowa you don't need those people anymore you just got to cut them them.

That's what happened.

And what about the fact that he went home to get new clothes?

Clean clothes, clean clothes.

Bill, Bill, Bill, again, let's be fair, and I think the ladies can relate to this.

Don't take it personally, by the way.

When you've been on the road.

Well, men don't need clean clothes.

Yes, of course.

That's the point.

When you've been on the road for 18 days,

sometimes you need to change things.

But

Bill, I'm telling you, ladies can relate to them.

Yes, of course.

18 days.

But he has no one in the campaign who can go get them for him.

He fired them all.

No, no.

He had to go home himself.

It has been on his, it was on his schedule for a month.

Come on, really?

Yes, it was on his schedule.

It's like laundry day.

The man wanted to go home.

Okay, but come on.

I know, but why don't you just say he wanted to sleep in his own bed?

I totally understand that.

That's one in the second.

This sounds like, you know, is America ready for a president?

He's not hurting.

You know what the problem is?

He's not a politician.

He just says exactly what it is.

I'm I'm going home I need a change of clothes somebody else Ted Cruz would have said it differently Dr.

Carlson's just athletic that's who he is but he let home to change clothes he doesn't have a no more no less it's not a flunky who could go get his clothes no no no he's got to peck them out himself he wanted to go home he wanted to he wanted to go home

leave the clothes out of him

rightliness and so on not about fashion with him he wanted to go home

Yeah.

Go to go home.

All right.

I thought it might be funny, but it wasn't criticizing.

We've all been there.

Is criticism of Hillary's vote for the Iraq War still fair game?

Well, of course.

He's in a campaign.

What kind of question is that?

Yeah, but he's a huge vote.

But wait a minute.

Obama was big enough to say that if he had been in the Senate at the time and got the same false information about weapons of mass destruction, he didn't know how he would have voted.

Really?

I mean, I thought it was very gentlemanly and great of Obama to say that.

I remember him making a very forceful speech.

No, those are the things.

It looks so prescient today about how dumb it would be to get involved in Iraq.

He wasn't in the Senate at the time.

It was before he was in the Senate.

Yeah, he was in Chicago in a street rally.

I mean, when you read it today.

He said that if he had known the same thing that Hillary knew, he might have voted differently.

I thought that was great of him to say that.

Okay.

So somebody else asked, is the country ready for a female president?

That seems kind of on the nose.

Yes.

And also,

I know that Hillary's campaign beats this to the

beating a dead horse, but let's just think about

who we are as a country if America follows up the election of its first black president with the election of its first female president.

I mean, that moment for us as Americans, I mean, we will forget about Donald Trump having ever run.

And it would be a little bit more.

But is it a reason to vote for someone just to do that?

No, I'm not saying that it is, but I do think

that

we're not voting.

She's not a second cycle.

This election cycle.

Or she should vote for them because they're black.

We're not voting for Sarah Palin, excuse me.

We're voting for a woman who represents the majority of women.

And men of the world are.

Of course we're not voting.

But, you know,

what percentage of black voters did Obama get?

Over 90.

Democrats always get that.

That's because he's a Democrat.

Well, it is the money.

They don't do it.

They don't get over 90.

But But I don't think Hillary is getting over 90% of women.

It just doesn't work the same way.

My daughters are not going to be able to do it.

Do you want to know why?

They're sort of interested in Bernie Sanders.

They were sort of interested in Rand Paul.

But

as to whether a candidate was

which gender or of what sexual persuasion, it just doesn't seem to write significant.

But there is a deep reason, I think, with women often, which is that most of us are raised by women, whether we are women or men.

I mean, there there are many more raised.

We were raised by women.

Wait, wait, that's my point.

There are a lot of...

No, no, no, that's my point.

Because we are raised by women, even though there are a lot more great fathers now than there used to be, but because we're mostly raised by women, we associate female authority with childhood emotionality, irrationality, you know, so on.

50 years ago.

We see, no, no, it's still, look at all those studies.

We see men's authority later, and it seems more rational and appropriate to the outside world.

So, I really don't think we will be able.

Wait a minute, we will be able to.

Something new for me.

Yeah, good.

Keep talking.

No,

no, because we will really only be able to recognize human talent in all of its forms when men are raising children as much as women are, and women are in the public world as much as men are.

And then we will be able to.

What do you think of the fact that recent studies have shown that when men, when husbands participate a lot in the child rearing, like, you know, very young, especially changing diapers, their testosterone levels drop?

Yes, OT.

Their alcohol intake and doses, I'm here to tell you.

There is the fight-or-flight testosterone, which women also have testosterone, incidentally.

There's also the oxytocin, which is the tendon befriend hormone, and that goes up in both men and women when we hold children, when we're with each other and empathize with each other.

This is not a bad thing.

I mean, testosterone poisoning is not what we want.

Testosterone.

Wait, wait, wait.

Let me speak up for testosterone.

We need testosterone.

It's testosterone on Sunday.

We do want some testosterone.

Testosterone does a lot in the male body to regulate everything else.

You need testosterone.

Yes, and women need testosterone too.

I'm just saying.

Okay.

They don't need it like that.

But

we need it in balance.

We don't need

crazed warriors going off on a test.

But there's a a happy medium, and when a man changes a diaper,

it could threaten his health.

That's all I'm saying.

True.

So true.

It's just true.

It's not bullshit.

It's not bullshit.

Oh, it's child shit.

Keep talking to us real.

It's just the truth.

And by the way,

80 countries in the world have elected a woman leader.

Not us.

Isn't it amazing?

Yeah.

I mean America should, whether this is the year or not, America should feel embarrassed about this.

Yes.

80 countries, I mean we're often late on a lot of stuff.

We were the last country to get rid of slavery, one of the last major countries.

But do we have to do that?

And we went to war over that one, yeah.

Right.

Do we have to have Golden Mayer?

Golden Mayer.

It's always scared me.

I would love to have Golden Mayer.

Well, she certainly looks good this year, doesn't she?

No, she never looked good.

Well,

precisely, but

the show is called real time.

Alex, do you think that the DNC's decision to add more debates to the primary schedule will have a positive impact for either candidate?

100%.

I mean, last night was a great example of that.

I just think you have two substantive people talking about substantive issues.

That's good for the country, that's good for the party, that's good for people.

It's being turned on to the Democratic process.

I'm sorry, but apologize to my Republican friends, but it does look like just a whole different species.

Yeah.

I mean, they had this substantive discussion among two adults who never went out of the bounds of decorum, talking about what progressivism is.

They're just on a different level of the evolutionary scale

than the feces throw on something that's hard to come to.

What's this?

I mean,

you can't, the circus is on the Republican.

Yeah, it's so much more fun.

It is more fun.

Of course.

Why do you think the Raiders are so much fun?

Please.

Can I, as a New Yorker, no longer a New Yorker, can I say a word about Trump as a New Yorker?

Please.

He is not a successful businessman.

Well, I thought you were.

Yeah, that's true.

That is quite true.

There was a guy at the Times who did a story about what his real net worth is, but you said he's not a successful business.

Because he is not a successful businessman.

Really?

No, he is a successful con man.

He is a con man.

That's a squad of businesses.

That's a squad that he business in America.

That is wrong.

You are wrong.

If he had taken the $200 million he inherited from his father, he was born on third bases.

That's true.

Absolutely.

You know, if he had taken the same amount of money and invested it, he would have made more money than he has now.

He went bankrupt or even bank.

He is a...

Yes, it's true.

First of all, we don't know that because we'll never know how much money he has because he's a giant, bombastic rider.

I'm just saying that everyone on him

said that he is not a successful businessman.

He has invested his New York Times reporter.

He sued me.

Well,

he's probably going to sue you.

Anyway, he lost.

He lost when you knew it.

There are many things you can question, Douglas.

He's not a successful business.

You cannot say something.

No, he told him.

He just leases his name and puts it on Bill.

I actually thought you were getting ready to endorse him when you said, can I say something about Trump?

Oh, please.

I am a shame.

Gloria, I'm very rich.

I'm very rich.

I'm very successful.

I'm very smart.

I'm smart.

I'm watching.

I'm successful.

So I saw him yesterday, and there's something that I've been talking about.

I'm a shame to come from the same city that he is in.

He is such a.

Well, you come from Toledo, Ohio.

It's okay.

You come from Toledo, Ohio.

No, you come from Toledolo.

Well, I do.

We both do.

Yeah, I know.

What does it say about the people that support Trump?

I think they're looking for

somebody.

The primary thing they say is he's a successful businessman and therefore he can run the country, which is why I think we need to know he is only a con man, not a successful businessman.

Okay, but I would say he's both.

Saw him, saw Donald Trump at an event in New Hampshire yesterday.

Oh.

And that hair thing, you know, that looks like

a animal.

It's a Cinnabon.

In person?

Yes.

It's just a comb over.

It's a Cinnabon.

I think it's a weed.

Sad.

It may be a weed.

I think it's a weed.

But

it's just a comb over.

All right.

I'm glad we settled that.

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.

Thank you.

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