C02 - Ep. 47 - Finale in Faunaloch - Lying Through Your SHEATH

migraine is 15 or more headache days a month, each lasting four hours or more.

Botox, onobotulinum toxin A, prevents headaches in adults with chronic migraine before they start.

It's not for those with 14 or fewer headache days a month.

It prevents on average eight to nine headache days a month versus six to seven for placebo.

Prescription Botox is injected by your doctor.

Effects of Botox may spread hours to weeks after injection, causing serious symptoms.

Alert your doctor right away, as difficulty swallowing, speaking, breathing, eye problems, or muscle weakness can be signs of a life-threatening condition.

Patients with these conditions before injection are at highest risk.

Side effects may include allergic reactions, neck, and injection side pain, fatigue, and headache.

Allergic reactions can include rash, welts, asthma symptoms, and dizziness.

Don't receive Botox if there's a skin infection.

Tell your doctor your medical history, muscle or nerve conditions, including ALS Lou Gehrig's disease, myasthenia gravis, or Lambert Eaton syndrome, and medications, including botulinum toxins, as these may increase the risk of serious side effects.

Why wait?

Ask your doctor, visit BotoxchronicMigraine.com, or call 1-800-44-BOTOX to learn more.

Attention, all small biz owners.

At the UPS store, you can count on us to handle your packages with care.

With our certified packing experts, your packages are properly packed and protected.

And with our pack and ship guarantee, when we pack it and ship it, we guarantee it.

Because your items arrive safe or you'll be reimbursed.

Visit the ups store.com slash guarantee for full details.

Most locations are independently owned.

Product services, pricing, and hours of operation may vary.

See Center for Details.

The UPS store.

Be unstoppable.

Come into your local store today.

At blinds.com, it's not just about window treatments, it's about you, your style, your space, your way.

Whether you DIY or want the pros to handle it all, you'll have the confidence of knowing it's done right.

From free expert design help to our 100% satisfaction guarantee, everything we do is made to fit your life and your windows.

Because at blinds.com, the only thing we treat better than windows is you.

Visit blinds.com now for up to 50% off with minimum purchase plus a professional measure at no cost.

Rules and restrictions apply.

Salutations all you savagers.

Climb on into the stinky dragon, knock back our latest latte.

Nod the brightest bulb.

It's a mixture of spikes place roast coffee, a claw full of cinnamonced meat, a sprinkling of dark chocolate spirits, one mouthful of this mauling mug, and you'll...

Previously, our adventurers took a talkative train ride with Tempur all the way to the fringes of Faunalok.

After dealing with dragon-leafed lightning leaves, avoiding annoying aromas, and decimating some Deflins, the party pussy-footed their way to Sheath headquarters.

Carble a cup of coffee and let's continue this crungent chronicle.

That's what happened.

I think he turned into a werewolf.

Yeah.

Because of his drink.

I think something happened to the bartender.

Wait, what?

I hope Duncan's okay.

I don't know what happened.

That's a weird throw to us.

We'll find out what's going on with him, hopefully.

We're already solving one mystery.

Stories upon stories upon stories.

Stories all the way down.

Can we get a mystery about you, Gus, the person as well, to layer on it?

Let me clear some mystery in case you're wondering.

My name is Gustavo Sorola.

I'm the dungeon master of this party.

That is my name.

And I'm going to hit our four players with an arrow.

This week's role-playing warm-up question is: if you had to make a craving throw to resist something, what would be the most difficult for your character?

Oh, I got this.

Oh, you do.

Oh,

I like that energy, that confidence.

Hey, it's Blenn Gibson, and I play Chip Paney level nine tea fling roll.

Yay!

And oh, if I had to take a craving throw, it'd bid me cheese.

Oh, I love them cheese curds.

Back at Yanford, they'd called me Chippopotamus because I just go to the all-you-can-eat buffet.

Just

cheese cards, cheese cards.

Didn't know where that was going.

I was like, do hippopotamuses like cheese?

It's because he mauled several students to death.

He trampled them.

One of their cheese curds.

I love how it squeaks on your teeth.

He's also more graceful in water than you'd expect.

Oh, yeah.

Very fast.

hippos are scary yeah yeah

i don't think they are they are they're terrible they're terrifying they're horrifying that's what they're one of the most dangerous animals in the world yeah yeah people who think that hippos aren't terrifying are the ones that get killed by don't they kill like more humans than like lightning strikes and sharks and like yeah combined that wouldn't surprise me yeah chippopotamus i'm almost positive that got debunked 500 people a year

Hey, you know what, John?

I bet you could take a hippo.

Say I could take a hippo.

I couldn't take most animals that size.

I'll go next.

I'll get it over with.

Oh.

Oh, well,

from one extreme to another.

It's having a rough arc.

Okay.

My name is Barbara Dunkelman, and I play Elga von Bras.

Barbara Dunkel!

And she's a half-elf vampire barbarian.

And I'm just going to answer this very quickly because my answer is very nuts and about the Elga had to make a craving throw before blood.

Okay, next person.

I don't think that's any other.

How about here?

Well, that's spice.

Whose?

Oh.

Out of you guys?

Just pick the buffet.

Yeah, in general.

80 persons.

You're at the mall.

You've got the whole food court.

Oh, nice.

Nice.

I like that.

You know,

I look at all these pop stars who are probably very wealthy and eat really well.

Probably have very pure, tasty blood, you know.

Maybe.

What are you thinking?

Beyonce.

I bet she tastes delicious.

Is there a difference between the blood of a meat eater versus like someone with a plant-based diet?

It's gotta be.

It's gotta be.

Probably.

Don't they feed like those certain cows certain food to get the certain.

I'm curious if

a vampire would prefer

someone who, no, someone who ate other animals

because there's more like

blood.

I know there's not more blood.

More blood.

More like

more iron.

Iron and like what?

I don't know.

I don't know, guys.

Very obvious.

If you're drinking blood for life force, then

one could argue that someone who eats meat has consumed more life force.

You want a big old southern boy who eats at Bucky's because you want

like pigs.

Like pigs make good meat.

Also, the 10th version of Beyonce is Beyond Se, and she's a ghost.

Oh, I like that.

Beyond Seance.

Bonjour.

Bonjour.

Speaking of ghosts, my name is John Reisinger, and I play Matiqu Confis.

And I busted up laughing, listening to Kristen make fun of Matid in the episode previously.

Sorry, I had to point that out.

It was hilarious.

Cravings that I would have a hard time resisting.

I actually

am able to resist most things.

I've quite the control over my body.

It's what I pride myself on.

However, there is one little thing that I

think I cannot say

no to.

And that is

a macaron.

Oh my gosh, my master.

You cannot eat just one.

If however there many are in front of me, they are gone after I'm done.

Do you know the difference between a macaroon and a macaron?

Yeah.

They're two different things.

One of them is the president of France, right?

I mean,

I've actually made both.

Yeah.

What's the difference?

One's harder than the other.

A macron is like the little cookie thing.

Yes, macron.

That's like kind of has like that soft cookie with the feeling.

Macaroon is like a more dense, usually like coconut flaked top.

Which one's kind of little?

They look like krabby patties.

They look like

macarones.

Macron.

Yeah.

Macron.

Yeah.

I still don't know the difference, but I like them both.

Yeah.

That's a good answer.

Oh.

I also like that.

And ladyfingers.

Oh, ladyfield.

Real ladyfingers.

Yeah.

That's a grotesque version.

I also like ladyfingers.

That's just John.

John likes ladyfingers a lot.

Didn't make coffee?

So good.

I want to point out something real quick.

We were filming something the other day, and we had to do like temp Mateed voice.

None of us could do.

So now two voices in total.

You guys can't do them.

So whatever my next accent, the best I could do was lose the H.

LO.

You know,

it sounds like a little Oliver twist or something.

Barney, Barney, wake up.

We're talking about creating candy.

I could not resist.

Yeah.

A good, the best candy in the world.

Uh-huh.

Where there's originals, hard candy.

That's in line.

But that's not all.

The second best candy in the world.

But wait, there's more.

Nico wafers.

Nico wafers.

Barney loves him so much he can't even bother to read the wrapper.

It just like tears right through them.

No, no, it's very apparent.

No.

You're googling candies you've never seen before.

Raising my hand, I object.

I ate those all the time as I was a kid.

My grandmother would always buy them for me.

What are they?

What are they?

They're like little

candy wafers.

I just, that's how I pronounce them when I was a little kid.

They're very chunky.

Yeah, they're terrible.

So crappy.

Well, some are terrible more than others.

They're awful.

So I don't think Barney introduced himself.

I think Barney was so excited about this, he just went straight into it.

Werner's original.

Those look terrible, Chris.

Yeah.

Look, I had them when I was a baby.

I didn't know that your grandma was torturing you.

You were a baby?

When I was a kid, I ate them.

My grandmother would always buy them for me.

Feed your baby's neckowafers.

Or do it's America.

500 babies die a year to neckowafers being said.

Barney, Barney.

And I'm a human cleric.

And

I'm being judged upon my candies.

That's not true, Barney.

That's okay.

You're not being judged.

You're being bullied.

Exactly.

Lina.

Lina, how old they are.

The Warlord's Original are so old they weren't being invented when I was born.

It's old.

Is that a salt burn?

Yeah.

They were made.

I don't know when they were actually made, but I think Warler's original has been around for

decades, right?

They were introduced in 1969.

Seems like they should be older than that.

I feel like, right?

Because all of our grandparents had them.

Neko wafers.

1912.

Wow.

I don't like, you know, I'm going to buy some.

And I'm going to bring them out.

I'll try it.

I just don't think that that's like a big hump, like a brag, because the things that are old are not always yum.

That's very true.

Usually not, I would say.

I feel like candy's only gotten better.

Yeah.

Apparently in the UK, they have Werthers chocolate.

Oh.

So maybe that's the Werthers new.

Maybe there's Warthers Original and Werthers New.

Did you know the first candy was used by the ancient Egyptians for cult purposes?

In ancient times, Egyptians, Arabs, and Chinese made candies with fruits and nuts that caramelized with honey.

The two oldest candy types are licorice and ginger.

Welcome to Tales of the Candy Dragon.

Micah found an alternate source saying Werther's originals are from 1909.

That sounds more accurate.

From the little town of Werther, Germany.

Oh, I made them.

Gustav Nebel.

Gusto, Germany.

Oh, are we playing DD?

I don't know.

We should start.

I think we're all just hungry.

You done chopping down on that donut there, Gus?

Almost.

Oh, my eyes.

You're choking.

Is it okay?

Those are from yesterday.

Are they?

Yeah, they're fine.

Dale donuts.

Oh yeah, Dale donuts.

I'm so hungry.

Alright.

You all make your way, sneaking and trying your best to avoid the locals, and eventually you come upon an isolated copse of shady trees where you find a lonely stump covered in lichen.

Sadate looks around for a moment, then furtively steps forward.

She brushes off some moss from the trunk and you see it.

The sigil of sheath hidden in the grain of the bark.

Sadante reaches out into the air and grabs something just above the stump.

Then she lowers her arm into the stump and you all hear the soft sheathing of a blade.

The stump twists and lowers into the ground revealing a spiral staircase beneath the earth.

Quickly now, everyone inside.

Okay, there I come.

You all make your way down the staircase into humid darkness until you finally reach the floor of a vague room veiled in shadow.

The stump and staircase twist back into place above you, thus extinguishing the last bit of light from the room.

A voice echoes in the chamber.

I wondered when you all would find your way down here.

I was beginning to think you were getting cold feet.

You hear the striking of a match and a small flickering flame illuminates the face of a plump mustachioed man wearing a blue coat with a high collar.

Welcome, detectives.

I'm Director Carl Waza of She.

How long have you been waiting in the darkness for?

How many matches did you go through?

Nope, not yet.

It's like a surprise party when the wrong person keeps coming in.

It's a UPS guy.

Dang it.

It opens up and it's just full of smoke.

Matches all over the floor.

I did say it was like it was veiled in mist and it was hard to see.

It was veiled in shadow.

Weezer raises the match and an overhead lamp dimly lights the room around you.

In the center of the room is a long table with six chairs.

There don't appear to be any windows or doors.

I'm afraid before we proceed any further, I need to be certain you are who you appear to be.

I'm Barney.

Everyone take a seat.

Weezer Weezer pulls out a small brass ring and places it on his finger.

He waves both hands up and down as if weighing scales.

A 15-foot dome of light shines down on you all.

Everyone make a charisma saving throw.

Zone of truth.

It's gotta be zone of truth.

Charisma saving throw?

Yeah.

Nine.

Could you want a rollo on this to prove that you're right?

14.

You can choose to fail it if you want.

17.

You can voluntarily fail.

I'll roll the 19.

I'll see what happens.

Okay, so we got, what was yours, John?

17.

I don't think I've done a Christmas savings row with Mateed yet.

Really not?

I feel like I asked for one a couple episodes ago.

Yeah.

Everyone's saved except for Barney.

Okay.

So, Barney or Chris, Barney cannot speak a deliberate lie.

Okay.

Make him do the ritual again.

So, are they aware that

who passed and who failed?

You don't know that.

So, Weezer begins walking around the room, looking at each of you.

Then, dramatically, he turns and says, we will start with you and points to sadate of course director what is your full name sadate tempur what is your occupation agent of sheath what is your favorite color purple thank you agent tempur who would like to go next I feel like those are very easy questions to know until yeah.

Alright then, let's move on to you.

Oh, hello!

What is your full phone name?

I mean, for as long as I could remember, it was Elga von Braath, but now I think it might be something else.

Hmm, fascinating.

Calliope.

Okay.

Elga slash Calliope.

He looks to Barney and like kind of does the like nodding talking thing like

Why do I hear a fart whenever I hear Farney?

Alright, Elga.

Don't want to know my favorite color?

What is your age?

That's a great question.

What is my age?

I don't know.

I've lost count.

304.

304.

Hmm.

And finally,

have you ever committed a crime?

Uh, I mean, probably accidentally, but not with malicious intent.

Duly noted.

Barbara looks actually nervous to the answer to that.

It's like when you look in your rearview mirror and there's a cop behind you and you're like,

I'm not doing anything wrong.

Or when you go through like border security when you're traveling and you're like, sweating, it's pleasure.

I hate it.

One time I was going into the, I was at Heathrow in the London airport in the immigration, the passport check, and they had like a little carved out section.

It was almost like a little jail in the line.

And there were like people sitting in there and then like an officer came in and started yelling at them, asking them why they were lying and why they were trying to come into the

England.

And I was like,

I was like, shouldn't they be in a room?

Why am I standing next to this?

Anyway, um, Weezer turns to Mate.

Tell me, what is your full name?

Uh, my full name is uh Ellen Mirren.

I see.

And what is your species?

Uh, I am a uh auroch.

I don't like this.

Barney's f eyes are wide.

Oh my goodness.

He thinks it's real.

Have you ever lied to anyone in this room?

Uh, never.

Helen Miran?

Ugh, confirmed Helen Miran, D and D player.

I've never seen an auroch who could fly.

That song from Dumbo.

Weezer moves down the line to Chip.

And you, sir, what is your full name?

Chip Haney.

And what is your

occupation?

Assassin, retired, now grieving husband.

Professionally?

That's a very sad occupation.

I'm getting some skins on.

Do you get the benefits of that?

Grieving widower?

Great, Grieving...

Yeah, yeah.

Thanks for the correction, Weezer.

Very, very cool.

Last question.

What is the first thing I ever said to you?

Oh, no.

Blaine doesn't know this.

Probably stop in the name of the law or something.

No.

That's very close.

Weren't we, like, in jail?

Very close indeed.

Was it?

Nobody move.

I'm Chief Inspector Weezer, and you're all under arrest.

We're gonna come back to that, because I got a lot of questions for you, Weezer, but move on to Barney.

He sees he's itching to answer your questions.

And you, what's your name?

Barnabas Barney.

And your age?

Trying to say.

Concentrating some hard

93.

Somewhere in that.

I guess I'd probably have not 304 if you are 193.

I think Barney also might not know.

Yeah.

the ripe i old young age

of 98

that doesn't seem right but okay

final question

barnabas farney are you currently alive

i don't know i don't know if anybody's ever answered it that way it's the truth is he t- is he lying time will tell what why didn't everyone else get that question Everyone got different quality.

Why am I talking like you?

Everyone got different questions.

Regardless, that'll do for now.

But before we go any further, I must have your word.

Everyone's word that any intel shared here does not leave here.

Lives depend on this.

Do I have your word?

You have a word from me.

Word?

How many words?

All of them?

Well, one from each of you, of course.

Yes.

I'll give you two words.

Knuckle sandwich.

The Weezer takes off his ring, and the dome of light dissipates, and he snaps his fingers.

The four walls surrounding you fall to the ground, revealing an underground facility glowing with crystal screens, a translucent map, a wall of equipment, and desks filled with people clicking away on typewriters.

This is Sheath HQ.

We have much to discuss, but first, allow me to introduce you to our tinkerer.

Siren, would you please join us?

Near the wall of equipment, you see a bronze boiler whistle with steam and suddenly sprout legs and arms.

It stands up and stomps its way over to you all.

Oh, what race is that?

Oh, what was

siren?

It was like a big steampunky machine.

Tinker.

It's like a, it looked like a bronze boiler, then it had like steam come out, then it sprouted legs and arms.

What's so funny?

Sorry, I wrote down Tinkler.

I was like, oh, Tinker.

Detectives, this is Siren.

Siren, I'd like you to make a...

Welcome back, Agent Mate.

Weezer looks quizzically at Siren, who has no face and just slats covering a central firebox and a chimney stack where a head would be.

Elga's doing that thing where her mouth is wide open and she's looking back from Mateed to Carl to Mateed to Carl.

Hell and Miriam, now I gotta give you a knuckle sandwich.

Did you know, Carol?

How many people knew about my wife except for me?

I didn't.

Thank you.

I believe you.

I didn't.

I didn't know anything.

You believe you don't know anything, yeah.

I know many things.

Curious.

Matid, was it

agent of she?

Correct.

Mate, Clafisu, Eric Cochrane Ghostmonk, threat level 9.

Recruited in 11:30 GM by the late director Lorenzo Walton.

Among many reconnaissance assignments, Mate was sent on a mission to locate a vampire that had gone rogue outside of Vania.

Wait,

level 9 out of what?

Like 10 or 100?

It's out of 8.

Oh.

Classified.

Wait, presumed dead.

Does that mean you died?

Barney.

You've seen Mate walk through walls, right?

Weezer would look at Barney and then look back at the rest of the party and say, oh, anyway.

Siren here is our tinkerer and can provide upgrades or additions to pieces of your equipment.

I feel like we need to sort some information out of it because

we don't even know what is going on.

Mati, do you remember any of this?

Do you remember being an agent and being on the hunt for a vampire gone rogue?

Uh, you know, it's it's uh it's very easy to remember the end of my uh

real life.

Uh I I have memories of plenty of parts of that area, but uh I've forgotten a lot of it, and so this sounds familiar.

What's my threat level?

Also nine, probably.

Chip Haney, threat level pending.

Oh, having said that, it's off the charts.

Could you you're gonna arm us?

Could you arm us with more knowledge?

Yeah, what's the vampire that Medin was going after, huh?

A briefing will follow, a tour of the armory.

Siren begins escorting you all to the northern wall where all the equipment is, or the equipment bay is, and begins pulling out various pieces of metal and various add-ons.

He looks, I guess, he'll look at you first, Barney.

Hi, please allow me to augment your armor.

Can you add pants?

I would love pants.

It's awfully chilly in here without

what does Barney have on under his plate armor?

I imagine it's like a shirtless white like kind of what are those shirts called a tank top a tank top

Chris used to like cut up white tees he'd take the collars and the sleeves off and he just looks like a little like like a little like like like like a guy maybe a servant are you wearing one under your shirt right now it's not cut up but yeah I mean it is pretty it looks like it's coffee stained yeah no it's just I don't like paint in them and stuff they're just like undershirts and they're really yeah so probably one of those like a cut up white rag shirt or maybe a tank top that's also all dirty and like suspenders and stuff like that.

Suspenders, yeah.

Oh my god, Barney's covered in tattoos

that only cover up, that only hold up my boxers.

Yeah, yeah, funny with the white tank top.

Yeah, with like real loose pants, you're constantly having to pull up, but your boxers stay up just fine.

Siren pulls out various tools, and you see it very quickly welding on and augmenting your plate armor before handing it back to you.

Upgrade complete.

Metagame-wise, you have Benedusk plate armor.

I liked liked when he was the voice of the dragon and Hobbit.

If you want to go ahead and you can, once you find it, you can read what that is.

Armor plate, very rare, requires attunement by a cleric that must deal 10 radiant damage upon the armor.

Armor class 18.

This translucent armor is now fitted with brass rings that glow like sunsets.

Offers AC18, normal for plate armor, but the wearer gains the following additional features.

Two chargers per long rest.

Aura of necrosistance.

All allies within five feet of you gain resistance to necrotic damage.

Blessing of Benedusk.

As an action, you can expend a charge to cast the bless spell on three creatures of your choice other than you within 30 feet.

Whenever a target makes an attack roll or a saving throw before the spell ends, the target can roll a d4 and add the number roll to the attack roll or saving throw.

Radiance of radiance.

Radiance of radiance.

Radiance of radiance.

As an action, you can expend a charge emit a burst of sun and moon beams in a 30-foot radius.

All enemies, targets in the area must make a constitution saving throw using my spellcasting DC.

On a failure, the target takes 1d8 radiant damage and is blinded until start of our next turn.

So, the radiance wand was already there.

Okay, so yeah, the rest of it's like uh upgrades, yeah.

So, other spells, and I can do it twice.

Ernie's AC is 20.

That is so cool.

That is so high.

It's the advantage of being able to wear heavy armor, but the downside is he gets disadvantaged on like stealth checks and some dexterity checks.

Siren then turns over and looks at Mateed, you know, reaches out its arms.

Arms?

Appendages.

That's the word.

Sure.

Instout.

Payline's collar, please.

I pull Gigi out of my hood and hand him the kitty and pull the collar off.

Okay.

Siren takes the collar, pops out like a little miniature sewing machine, and begins furiously working on it and then hands you back the collar.

Collar, collar, upgrade complete.

Collar, collar.

I mean the cat gets the bonus?

Yeah, Gigi's got it.

Where is wearing it?

That's cool.

You want to know what it does?

Yes, please.

This bronze collar is padded on the inside and tailored to fit the neck of Gigi.

It is encrusted with a tiny dangling sending stone that relays a message to target.

Tell Gigi your desired recipient and then speak a message of up to 25 words.

Yijiji will typically travel at their normal movement speed to search out the recipient, but the message can only be stored in the collar for one hour.

When Gigi arrives, they will immediately open their mouth and deliver your message, replicating the sound of your voice.

Gigi speaks only to a creature matching the description you gave.

If they don't reach their destination before the hour is up, the message is lost, and Gigi makes their way back to you.

Oh, so it's a bit more of a complicated sending stone.

It's not one you could just do to anybody anywhere in the world.

It's like a little pigeon.

Yeah.

Yeah, carrier bird.

But he is a ghost, so he can get to a lot of places.

It's like Cartistaya, but actually good.

Does that make sense?

Whoa.

Whoa.

Does that mean Gigi could also go to the Astrial Plane, maybe?

I don't know if Gigi has that ability.

He would have to be like a plane walker.

Could you send him there?

I could banish him there, yeah.

Yeah, to potentially deliver a message.

She's someone there.

Interesting.

She came back.

She came back.

She was only there for what?

Five minutes?

She's coming back.

I wonder what she thought, because didn't the castle fall down?

Yeah.

What I was thinking was like, boo-boo.

She would have come back in the same spot and would have just fallen.

Siren turns to Chip.

Crossbow and penny frost diagram, please.

Oh, okay.

Here you go.

I'll throw it to him.

All right.

Siren turns around and begins hammering at it and, you know, pulling the strings taut and hands it back to you, Chip.

Crossbow of coolness complete.

Oh, thank you.

Lucy, crossbow coolness, a cold and calculated combination of your hand crossbow and the fang frost dagger on loan from Elkovon Brath.

This wintry weapon can be used as a melee or as a ranged attack weapon and has a plus two to attacks and damage, three charges per long rest.

It has polar protection.

You have resistance to cold damage while you hold this weapon.

Neat.

Ranged rhyme.

Upon firing a crossbow bolt at an enemy, hit or miss, as a bonus action, you can expand a charge to cause the bolt to explode with icy shards.

Each creature within 10 feet of the target must make a DC-15 dexterity saving throw or take 4d6 cold damage.

Awesome.

And bitter cold bayonet.

As an action, you can use the Fang Frost Dagger as a bitter cold bayonet.

On a hit, you can expend a charge, no action, and the target must make a DC-15 constitution saving throw or become frozen.

C, petrified, until the start of your next turn.

frozen that's cool that's very cool i think it's funny that the guy with fire resistance now has ice attacks and cold resistance there oh i'm resistant to all of the elements or two of them

are you resistant to a nice normal temperate day in los angeles of 70 degrees right in between that's my weakness that's my kryptonite if you ever run into a magmavilinch you're uh you're all sad

you know what that does what you know the worst thing the worst pain ever is if you're out in the snow and your hands get really, really cold and then you put them in hot water.

Don't do that.

Just like needles.

Yeah, like as a kid, when I didn't know any better.

Some people think that if they get like frostbite or something like that, they should just put their hands under hot water.

Don't do that.

Yeah.

Oh, IRL.

I lost the feeling in my hands because I used to work in a freezer during summers and then I just was dealing with frozen foods and milk.

They already had resistance to ice.

Yeah.

Also, if you burn your hands, don't run under freezing cold water either.

Both are bad.

Extremes are bad.

Extremes are bad.

Extremely bad.

Siren turns to you, Elga, looks you over, scans you.

One moment.

Then Siren turns around and from the armory pulls out a pickaxe off the wall.

Another axe.

Lays it down on an anvil, and then like an automatically, like a little face shield comes over his, over Siren's non-existent face.

You don't know why Siren has that.

For dramatic effect.

Siren begins hammering at this hot axe, then plunges it into some cold water and then hands it to you.

Bonjour pickaxe.

Complete.

Wow.

And does it give you anything in exchange?

Negative.

Sweet.

How many axes do we have making?

We used to do a lot of little videos where we would test D and D in real life.

We need to do one now.

Just Barbara holding every axe that she has.

I have four.

Four axes.

Axe of Gainy, Axe of Scariff, Bone to Pickaxe, and...

Battle Axe.

Battle Axe.

Also, a good memory of my particular...

I couldn't even probably tell you that.

You want to go and read the bone to pickaxe to everyone?

Bone to pickaxe.

I have three charges on it, which is great.

Forged from metallic dragonic bones.

this polished pickaxe has a plus two bonus to attack and damage rolls made with this magic weapon.

It has three different abilities.

It has deft digging.

While wielding this pickaxe, you have advantage on skill checks relating to digging or mining.

Not sure what those would be.

Fun.

We have the pick me instead.

When a nearby ally is the target of an attack, you could see and within range of your movement speed.

You can expend it, charge, and use your reaction to swap places with the ally.

the movement is instantaneous and does not provoke attacks of opportunity so if one of you guys are suffering about to get attacked i could swap places with you oh you know me and then settling scores when you hit a creature with a melee weapon attack you could expand one charge to attempt to damage another creature with the same attack choose another creature within five feet of the original target and within your reach if the original attack roll would hit the second creature it takes the same damage dealt by the original attack dope I guess in simple terms, it means what?

Like if I'm attacking one creature.

And there's another one within five feet of it, you basically double that

chain attack.

Yeah, exactly.

Excellent.

Like a sweeping attack kind of thing.

Two questions.

Yeah, kinda, but it's more like automatic.

Yeah, okay, cool.

John, you have the floor?

Yeah, I have two questions.

One was, Elka can hold two axes in attack, right?

I thought you had an ability that allowed you to do that.

I don't know if she took that.

I don't think I do, yeah.

My damage, what I do basically, is dependent if I'm holding it with two hands or one hand.

And then my other question is, did you mean to give the one of us who looks like a little kid an item for Minecraft?

A screeper!

No, no, that's Barney.

Why?

He's all just looking slowly towards me.

Weezer walks up and joins you all at the equipment bee.

Sadate has been updating me on the situation, and I believe it's time we brought you four into the fold.

Come with me to my office, you two siren.

Weezer moves toward the equipment wall, and you see him reach for a silver sheath in the center of the wall.

He rotates it clockwise, and the wall splits in two, revealing an office with a cluttered desk, rolling chairs, and a table with a green crystal screen glowing softly.

Oh, now that we got our upgrades, we get to level up.

So, I'm gonna assume you're gonna level 10, 11.

Chip Haney, threat level two.

Yes!

I hit the machine!

He's broke!

Weezer walks past you into the office and motions for you all to follow him.

Elga follows.

I do as well.

Me too.

I whisper to Gigi and I say, Go tell Chip that I am a higher threat level than him.

And then I send Gigi off.

I am a higher threat level than him.

I can do that.

Yeah, Gigi walks up to you, Chip, and his mouth opens, and like a disembodied Mate voice says, I am a higher threat than a kid.

I'm in a skin, you cat.

I used my telekinetic thing to tell Chip something.

Uh-huh.

Telekinesis isn't a communication tool.

You know, I have to rhyme it, though.

Telepathic.

Yep.

Hey there, Chip.

I think you're really strong.

Oh, God.

You're my buddy all along.

Get out of my way.

Chip, I'm talking to you at normal time.

What's the next line?

Oh, that was it.

It was just,

I can do nothing.

All right.

I'll go ahead um

i hope you like this little song because

when uh

i i don't want to make it overly long okay that's right not that bad you're getting faster at that oh

anyway anyway i'll go walk ahead everyone uh else follows i assume yeah yeah so chip yeah you were asking about carol yeah I want to know about my wife.

He really asks about that.

Listen, you know, we've known each each other for a long time.

I think probably long enough for me to have communicated that I was on a search for my wife, Carol.

Chances are you knew about this and you didn't tell me, and now she's passed away.

So, what the heck?

Well, the first thing you should know is that Carol was drafted into Sheath with me as her handler.

That doesn't help.

You're making it worse for yourself.

The problem is that she was undercover and communication was very sparse.

She was tasked tasked with finding out what Eddie knew and what he was up to.

But as I said, any communiques between us were few and far between.

Did you were you aware of the belt?

Unfortunately, no.

Do you have a belt?

Well, of course.

How else would I hold up my parts?

The spenders.

All right.

And points to Barney.

Demonstrates.

I just realized Chip and Carol are very Mr.

and Mrs.

Smith situation.

Yeah.

So, I mean, when did that happen?

Was this before or after the parade that you tasked her with this?

This would have been before the parade.

Okay.

I was merely her handler at the time.

That was when Lorenzo was still the director of Sheath.

And then were you aware that she was visited at our house by Eddie and stuff?

Did she was she able to report that?

Or did she like like when did she lose contact?

When was the last time you spoke to Carol?

The last time I spoke with her was at your house.

Wait, was this when I was sleeping?

Was this the

best?

Well, you did see someone in a blue jacket with a high collar, and you assumed it was Eddie.

But but wasn't he

accompanied?

Wait, so were you undercover?

It was a separate time.

Okay.

Yeah, I think there were two different things you're remembering here.

There's people coming to my house, so I was just, what was it, goofing off?

Yeah, there was one, I think you were sleeping when Eddie came and threatened Carol.

Yeah.

And there was another one when he was outside.

Yes.

And I think that was like the dream, the dream you had.

This makes sense that you keep failing on perception checks.

She saw someone in a blue collar.

Didn't even know.

Carol, can you get the door?

I'm in the bathroom.

Hey, Sticky Dragon, your favorite Bortalian private here to talk to you about your most important mission yet, your finances.

That's right, we've all had those headaches you get while trying to make progress with your finances, whether it's overdraft fees, missed pay bids, or wishing you had more ways to save.

Today's sponsor, Chive, understands that every dollar counts.

When you set up direct deposit through ChII, you get access to fee-free features like free overdraft coverage, getting paid up to two days early with direct deposit, and more.

Learn more at chime.com slash dragon.

Chime is banking done right.

You can open a checking account with no monthly fees and no maintenance fees, and with qualifying direct deposits, you're eligible for free overdraft up to $200 on debit card purchases and cash withdrawals.

To date, Chime has spotted members over $30 billion.

That's That's right, $30 billion with a B.

And look, I wish I had started using QIIME sooner.

Chime has tools for daily balance updates and real-time transaction alerts to help you shape your spending habits and get on top of your financial goals.

Plus, the convenience of having access to 47,000 fee-free ATMs nationwide and 24-7 customer support really comes in handy.

Work on your financial goals through Chime Today.

Open an account in two minutes at chime.com/slash dragon.

That's chime.com slash dragon.

Chime feels like progress.

Chime is a financial technology company, not a bank.

Banking services and debit card provided by the Bankwork Bank NA or Stripe Bank NA, members of FDIC, slot me eligibility requirements, and overdraft limits apply.

Timing depends on submission payment file.

These apply at Out of Network ATMs, bank ranking, and number of ATMs according to U.S.

News and World Report 2023.

Chime checking account required.

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance.

Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game?

Well, with the name Your Price tool from Progressive, you can find options that fit your budget and potentially lower your bills.

Try it at progressive.com.

Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates.

Price and coverage match limited by state law.

Not available in all states.

Can you get Lenore out of the bathroom?

So the Wolfman was the head of Sheath.

Correct.

And someone killed her.

Yes, a little over a week ago, the Wolfman was murdered.

And when that happened, I became the director of Sheath.

And you four were at the top of the list of suspects.

But now do you know who did it?

Do you know it was Carol?

Well, the prevailing theory is, yes, that Carol murdered the Wolfman, but the details and evidence are still in the wind.

Did you know who we were before meeting us at the jail?

No, I did not.

You had no idea who any of us were?

Well, I was aware that Carol was married.

I mean, you seem to know Mate.

No, I'm afraid that was news to me.

Siren knows Mate.

Siren.

And Siren's a automaton that could have been around for a while.

Oh, it might do any wages.

I feel like I might have

missed some back pain.

Before I answer that, I want to answer something else that you said right before that.

To be clear, Siren is a steam golem.

They weren't built by anyone here in Shaith.

Siren simply has always been here.

So whatever they are talking about regarding Mateid was before my time.

You think it's too much of an ass?

Could we get Brent Spiner to do the voice for Siren?

I feel like getting data in there would be great.

Is he on cameo?

Just send him a transcript.

15 cameo requests, individual lines.

God, that's funny.

Well, what about okay, well, where does the Wolfman's daughter fall into this?

I know you're gonna be like, ah, classified information.

No more hooey baloooey.

We need to know all the facts because we gotta help with this investigation.

I'm just yelling this entire episode.

I mean,

and I'm sorry, I don't mean to be too aggro, but like, this is like

picking at Chip a lot because there's so many people that knew about what was going on with his wife, and now she's dead.

And I feel like Chip would blame those people.

Arnie's like, profanity, watch again.

I'm sorry, but I feel like

honey catches more bees than

says the man who was screaming like two episodes ago trying to kill Dracula.

How many bees does honey catch?

I'm not sure what the ratio is.

But Macia went missing weeks

Yeah, that's true.

Wait, who's missing?

You don't have a good track record so far.

And once again, where's my back pain?

Isn't that always the way of secret organizations?

When everything goes right, you don't know that anything happened at all.

I've seen burn after reading, I know.

Oh, do you know that Benicio is in the vampire?

Yes, we're aware of that situation, and she is back in friendly hands.

Do you know who put her there?

There is still information to be debriefed from Sadate's intel.

So, you were tasked with keep uh or someone was tasked with uh looking up on Eddie.

What made Eddie a suspect before all of this?

We learned of Eddie six months ago when he arrived in Fonalok.

He looked much different back then, large as a giant to be sure, but much more normal.

Back then, Fonalotians were welcoming of all strangers, even humanoids.

Eddie posed as a Mormon zealot and quickly gained the trust of the community.

He knew the right things to say.

That was our first red flag.

We didn't know who he was or where he had come from, but somehow he knew things.

Alright, I think Eddie's been dividing his soul into horror

and has gotten uglier.

Do you by any chance know the alchemist, Robert Esteban?

Yes, of course.

We're going to need to work with him in order to bring things to a successful conclusion.

Is he an agent of sheath, where does he fall into the hierarchy?

He is not an agent, but we do contract work with him occasionally.

Have you properly vetted him?

Because it sounds like you've been infiltrated on numerous occasions.

I wouldn't say numerous.

Have you ever met his son Henry?

Yes, I know him, but before we get too off-topic here, there's more to Eddie's story you should know.

Okay.

After some time, the Fanolotian community was celebrating a ritual called Afinitour, led by the archdruid Nesetera, or as many know her, Nessi.

The ritual ceremony centers on communing with nature at the sacred shores of Loch Cestnes.

During the ceremony, the four lotians immersed themselves in Loch Cestis, seeking visions and guidance from the Great Maw.

Some were granted visions, while others were returned to Maw, seen as a great honor.

However, Eddie is an entirely different story.

He waded into the loch, but something happened to him.

Some say he was punished by the Great Moor, Others say it was an allergic reaction.

Whatever caused it, Eddie lost his skin and was changed into the disfigured creature you say to die.

So let me get this straight.

During this ritual, some people would have visions of the Ma, and others would return to the Ma as if to say they died in the lake.

Yes, they were reclaimed by the Maul.

That's you're so casual about a bunch of people drowning themselves in a lock.

As I said, it's considered an honor.

I'm not one to judge the cultural traditions of others.

I'll look at my party.

Am I crazy?

Are their bodies left behind?

I'll show you a movie called Midsummer.

It'll take

you to explain the old thing.

I hate Ariaster.

Both body and spirit are reclaimed by the Maw.

Okay.

Okay.

Are they...

Is the Ma

a creature living in the lake?

The Ma is and the Paw are like the two deities.

Yeah, but I'm like, is there like a physi- Is there a physical manifestation of the Maw?

No, of course not.

It's a deity.

Okay.

Okay.

But back to Eddie.

That day was the last time we saw him.

All efforts were made to track him down, but he

was just gone.

That is until three weeks ago, we heard whispers of someone in parish that matched his description.

Wayne needed someone who had ties to that area of Grotith.

Okay.

So this ritual went wrong.

He lost his skin, got all weird, and then fled.

Correct.

Wait, so where is Sheath's stance on Ma and Pa?

Sheath is independent of any religious affiliation.

Okay, sure.

But like, you guys know of, you know, all the different cultures and all the different lands.

So, like, generally speaking, which is the more, like, I don't know, peaceful religion?

Most Grotethians tend to gravitate more towards the more,

while most Abrylians lean toward the poor.

Right.

But that is brushing with broad strokes.

There are exceptions, of course.

And whenever Eddie disrupted this ceremony, did it impact any of the other people in the lake?

Not that we're aware of.

Just him.

Yes.

Furthermore, we now know what Eddie was after.

He's been trying to uncover an ancient sacred.

That's what led him to work with Hugo, who has been around Roteth longer than most.

That secret is kept hidden beneath Lock Cessness.

It could prove catastrophic if Hugo discovers it.

It's only a matter of time before Hugo reveals his plans in Fonolok and seeks to infiltrate the lock.

I understand you have a way of contacting the alchemist.

Yeah, Cartiste, I am.

What?

We need him to come in and concoct an elixir for us.

Something that will help us protect the secret from Hugo.

Okay.

Can you tell us what's locked under what ancient secret is locked under Loxesnes?

That, I'm afraid, is on a purely natano basis.

Well, we clearly need to know.

What we need is to stop Hugo.

Well, you need us to help you, so.

Yes, to stop Hugo.

Yeah, and we need to know in order to want to stop you.

What I guess, what would...

If Hugo uncovered the secret, what would that do?

Would it give him power or does, you know.

To put it mildly, it would be a disaster.

The world would be upended, and the fear that I have as director of Sheath is that if I divulge intel to people like yourselves, then you could become compromised by Hugo.

Are you aware that the alchemist's wife was in a relationship with your former director?

And does that impact anyone's ability to do their job?

Because that seems like a conflict of interests.

Aren't they a triangle?

I mean, it would be, it would be if

thinking about it from my perspective, if

the

alchemist knew that his wife was with the director, he might not be that happy towards Sheath.

Yeah, but wasn't it a full triangle?

He was also with the director, because they have a son or a daughter together.

Oh my god, you're right.

Yes, we know that now.

It was a full triangle, equilateral.

I don't understand triangles.

At first, it did complicate things, but the former director gave me assurances that assuaged my concerns.

Yeah, I'm sure you don't need to flag that to HR or nothing.

Yeah, I'm sure it's all good.

I'm sure it's all good.

Don't worry.

I'm also in charge of HR now.

Great.

All right.

One more thing.

So you can bring your concerns directly to me.

Director Weezer.

I have one more question for you.

Is there anyone else that's an agent of sheath?

You gotta tell me, because if another one of you guys comes out of the woodwork, I'm gonna stab him.

I pull out Gigi and I talk talk to Gigi and I say, go tell Chip, I am an agent of sheath.

Gigi walks up to you, opens its mouth, and you hear Matith's voice, I am an agent of sheath.

Barney raises his hand.

Let me answer his question first.

For security purposes, we can't divulge all agents' names for fear of them becoming compromised.

Mr.

Farney, you have a question?

Barney looks around, really scared.

Am I an agent of sheath?

Well, no.

God, no.

Perhaps you might be one of our best agents if you were.

So, this elixir that we have to get the alchemist to make, is that for Hugo to drink, or what is it for?

My understanding is that it will be something that could protect you.

Go for us.

Indeed.

Okay.

I do have one question.

Remind me, which vampire was I going after?

Was I going after Ugo?

That I don't know.

That was before my time.

Siren, who was I going after?

Your target was Hugo Bonbrath.

I wasn't the only one.

Okay, your dad killed me.

He did?

Yeah.

I thought the little belt killed you.

No.

Wait, didn't the belt...

You were wearing a belt, though.

No.

No?

Yeah.

Sorry.

I thought stupid.

I thought McKeed had a vision of the same belt around them.

No, I got bit.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh.

I recall a belt being in the past as well.

I recall it being Berenstein Bears.

Oh my god.

Shazam?

I'm afraid time is of the essence.

We need you to write the alchemist a letter using your Carter State Aya.

The letter needs to convince him to come to Funalock immediately.

A meet at the Arning Amphitheater.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, all right.

He also needs to send the recipe of his anti-sestness elixir.

Sheath Intel indicates he's been working on it for some time.

I have a question.

Are you 100% sure you can trust Alchemist?

I really agree.

I don't think you can.

Your concerns are noted, but he's the best asset we have in the coming fight and we need him.

What about us?

Well, we need you too.

Well, who do you need more?

Well, if I had to choose

the alchemist.

Okay, so we need to just write to him, Chip, if you want to take out your pen.

You got it.

I pull out like like a...

I go to one of the desk jockeys and I borrow a quill and I say, can I partis?

Yeah, they just look at you.

That's a yes.

Make me a perception check, Chip.

That is a

eight.

Listen, you gotta stop asking me for perception checks.

I'm gonna fail him every time.

Okay, like Weezer said, you need to write a letter convincing the alchemist to come to Fauniloc, meet at the Awning Amphitheater, and bring the rest, or send the recipe for his anti-Sessanus elixir.

Anti-what?

Sessanus?

Like lock sessanus.

Thank you.

So, Chip, are you going to write the letter?

Yeah, sure.

Why not?

What the heck?

All right, what are you going to write?

Actually, no.

All right, who's going to write it?

I slide it over to Mate.

Here you go, wordsmith.

Mate, make me a perception check.

Oh, okay.

It's all part of my master.

There you go.

That's a 14.

As Chip is sliding the Cartester Aya over to you, you see like a glint of light bounce off of his cold badge.

And you look at it and you realize that it's different.

The letters on his cold badge have changed from C-O-L-D to S-H-E-A-T-H.

Oh, okay.

So he's now a sheath agent?

Apparently.

S-H-H-E-A-T-H.

I do nothing.

You don't tell me this?

What do you write on the letter?

I was half paying attention to your instructions because I knew Blaine had to take care of it.

You said you want him to come here, but also to send his recipe for the anti-liloganism elixir.

Says, yeah.

Exactly.

Nothing else?

No, that's it.

Yeah,

we need that recipe for the elixir so we can get the ingredients ready for him.

Just ask him if he's an agent of sheath.

Just

with P.S., are you agent of sheath?

Please, yes, sir.

What's the limit on the Cartesia?

Cartesia, or yonder letters are pairs of parchment that allow two creatures to communicate long distances via the written word.

Any writing implement may be used to write a short letter of 25 words or less.

Okay.

Right there.

I don't want to use the quilt.

I want to go one of the typewriters.

You said there's a quick word.

Yeah, there are typewriters here.

I'm going to go do that and prove that I'm listening to you guys.

Yeah.

There you go.

I'm going to cat it for you on my hands.

Okay.

I'm not starting yet.

I'm not starting.

I'm the one typing.

I'm the one typing.

I'm going to throw this heavy metal dice over.

this is Matit Compisu, the Eric Cochrane ghost monk.

Eric Cochrane's one word.

I think we only have one use of this, by the way.

We have like two.

You have eight.

All right.

How many have I done?

Eight.

Eight?

Okay.

Nine.

Bonjour.

This is Mati Confisiu, the Eric Cochrane Ghost Monk.

I was right then.

You said I was wrong.

I did it.

Yeah.

All right.

Anyway, we're going to.

How are you?

I'm fine.

Oh, my God.

Gigi is too.

How many am I at?

Why might I count that 17?

17.

I got plenty.

You have seven words left.

That's plenty.

Come to Sheath.

20.

Uh, anti-sestness.

What?

Elixir.

Elixir.

Elixir?

Was anti-sestines hyphenated?

Yes.

Okay.

Does that count as one word then?

Send anti-sestness elixir recipe.

24.

And then I have Gigi

get a little ink on his pop and do a pot print on it.

Oh, cute.

25.

Do pictures count?

Emojis?

How many emojis can I use?

We'll say each emoji counts as one.

Did Elga come over?

It doesn't include it, but scribbles on the bottom.

I am also a bad.

You start scribbling, but the paper just won't take.

Like,

it won't write on there.

All right, make me a

persuasion check, Mateed.

That's a 17.

That's a 17.

Okay, yeah, you fire off.

How am I doing a persuasion check with this?

Oh, because I'm sending him a message asking for it.

Okay.

Yeah.

It makes sense.

How persuasive was my typing?

It's pretty good.

17?

Pretty good.

Your inquiry about how he's doing is much appreciated.

No one ever takes the time to ask.

What's the most persuasive margins?

What about Tito?

One inch.

One inch?

Okay.

Did you use Comic Sans?

Yeah, yeah.

It's a typewriter.

After a moment, you get a response.

I'm not entirely sure what's happening, but I appreciate the urgency and gravity of the situation.

I can be in Final Lock in an hour.

And then there's a list at the end of it.

See?

Nailed it.

I nailed it.

Iron Ore, Dragonleaf Tree Root, Lockwood, Archone Flowers, and Wolf Spain.

One more time.

Iron Ore?

Iron Ore,

leaf tree root.

Loch quid.

Like L-O-C-H-Q-U-I-D.

It's liquid from Loch Cestnes.

Arcone flowers.

Like arcane flowers, but with an O instead of Nay.

Fancy.

And Wolf's Bean.

And a spoonful of sugar to help the medicine go down.

Isn't Wolf's Bane the stuff that the Wolfman was picking up?

I am Wolf's Bane right here.

It's a plant.

Back in the first couple episodes, I put Wolf's Bean in a book and pressed it.

Wolf's Bean.

Wolf's Bane.

And a Wolf's Bean burrito.

And pressed it to save it.

You did.

Yeah.

Nice.

There's no time to waste.

I'm sending you all back into the village of Fonalok to collect the ingredients we need for the Elixir.

The only ingredient that isn't local is ironically the one we already have, thanks to Barnabas Farney.

Well, look at here.

That's Agent Barnabas Farn.

It's in my alms box.

Do we still have those badges, the cold badges, that are switched now?

Yes, you think about that, and you look at it, and you realize that now it no longer says C-O-L-D, it says S-H-E-A-T-H.

Look, our magic badge has changed just to say sheath.

Isn't that a bad idea?

It's like, hey, look, secret agent man.

Well, perhaps you should cover it up.

Why are you wearing it like that?

Well, I don't even think I should be wearing it to begin with.

What if we get captured?

Well, how else are you going to identify yourself to another sheath agent?

Isn't there like a secret handshake?

Yeah, you know, you know, in dagger, we've got a secret

little chant.

Well, do you want to make a secret handshake?

We could make one right now.

Well, I mean, does are you gonna communicate it to every other agent of Sheath?

No, it could be our handshake.

How is it a secret if everyone knows it?

It's just because the agents of Sheath know it.

No, no, no.

We need to develop a handshake for every agent.

Gus has figured out how to yes, Andy right now and still make you laugh.

That's cool.

Chief Inspector Wizard, I apologize for my friendship.

I think it just hasn't had his breakfast this morning.

Would you like a day old donut there's a day already?

He's a little hangry.

I may help myself

not to perpetuate any stereotypes.

I was going to say.

I'm hungry.

I am too.

We're old men who eat early.

So, do you present the Wolf's bean, Barney?

I mean, yeah?

Good answer.

You mean yeah, or yeah?

Yeah, I mean, I already thought I did.

Oh, no, I'm just like, I'm clarifying.

So, you pull it out of your office.

You had it.

Yeah, I found it.

You are using your pickaxe to get Minecraft materials.

Sorry, I just realized that as I thought about the ingredients.

Wow, that was really good.

Were you doing like Minecraft music?

Tracks.

Siren reaches out one of their appendages to you, Barney.

Careful, it's poisonous.

Man, you remembered.

I was hoping you had forgotten that.

All right, yeah, how do you hand it over then?

Or you just let Siren grab it?

Well,

are we giving them all until we collect them?

Or are we giving them as we get them?

I mean, we'll get them.

We'll bring it here eventually.

It wouldn't be the worst to just have it there for safekeeping at HQ.

That way we don't lose it out in the field.

I mean, I've had it this entire.

I know, but you know,

stuff.

I'll keep it for now because I don't.

I'm not.

Are you certain?

You can hand it over to Siren for safekeeping in case anything happens.

Just give it to

him.

Like what?

You get robbed.

Yes.

Old men like you are targets on the train.

That's true.

Alright, can I give Siren some of it?

Because I had a how much of it is needed?

Can I keep some?

Okay.

Can I give like half of it?

Yeah.

I know.

You can't let go of anything.

You're just like an absolute hoarder.

I'm suspicious of like

just like giving away stuff.

Yeah, like a hoarder.

Yes.

He didn't help his case with that.

Yes.

You just hate my apartment.

Yeah, something you've never used has just been in your sheet.

I knew I had it immediately.

To maximize all time, I would recommend that you all split up into teams of two.

Each team will find and secure one ingredient from the recipe.

I will send Sadate and Siren as one team, and two more of my agents as another.

That leaves you four to split into pairs.

Okay.

So bring your father to work day.

I grab chip

and we fly off.

I guess this would be a good father-daughter bonding moment.

I would be honored.

Okay.

Why do you whisper that?

Also, do you want to call me Calliope or Elga?

I don't really.

What do you want?

Well, I mean, I've gone by Elga for this long, so okay.

I'll be Elga.

You may call me Ellen.

Alright, so we...

Which I just think you're saying Ellen.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We have Elga and Barney, and then Chicken Ratid.

What ingredient does each pair want to go for?

We want to get the iron bar.

Iron ore?

There's iron ore, lochwood, dragon leaf, tree root, arcane, arcone flowers.

I think I kept saying dragon leaf.

It should be dragon leaf.

Dragon leaf.

What you want to get?

Dragon leaf, tree root?

So they seem like more like floral type things, plants.

I was going to say iron ore.

That should probably go to Elga because they might have to mine for it.

Get it.

Use that axe.

So if Elga and Barney are going for the iron ore, then Chipmunk have to choose between Dragonleaf, Tree Root, Lockwood, or Arcone Flowers.

You want Lockwood?

Let's go Lockwood.

Hoping they go for that one.

Good.

That does sound fun.

More dangerous.

I'm down for it.

I want to spend.

We're just getting some iron.

I'm secretly trying to get Chip killed so he's a ghost with me.

Go, buddy.

Yeah.

I welcome death.

I missed my way.

Siren turns around, opens up a couple of drawers, and rummages around for a second, then spins around, hand open, outstretched in front of you all high five I know that's what I was thinking in Siren's hands are four rings that you high five out and they clatter down onto the floor

all right see you later and then Chim awkwardly gets on his knees

I call heart

are they different in some way the rings these rings are ring of fauna form oh so what does that do

to animals oh do we look like the nest you can change your appearance to appear like a local funal lotion

funalion okay um

yeah so there's there's four of them what do they look like oh i'm glad you asked yay give yourself an inspiration though thank you um for asking a question i'm just kidding it's a bronze ring that's inscribed with a rune it's not necessarily in a language you understand but it looks kind of like from your perspective or the languages you know it looks like uh an m and a w joined together with uh like an a like a tongue shape, like an A between them.

Like a maw?

Kinda, yeah.

It's just you pronounce it moi.

You?

Moi.

What do you mean you?

Moi?

You.

What do fun elotions look like?

Metagame-wise, you can choose an appearance of one of the different fauna fams.

There's like six different ones.

That's cool.

So the ring will allow you to disguise your physical appearance as well as your clothing, your armor, your weapons, and everything.

And it takes an action for you to activate it, and an action if you want to dismiss it.

If you don't dismiss it, it lasts for an hour.

There are uh k-miners, which are like dog-like moles that live in dens and are proficient at digging.

Dephilins, which are ethereal cats that live in tree roots and they're proficient at defense.

Didn't we fight?

Although we came across those, you did.

Erstructs, which are bipedal, bear-like beasts that live in caves and are proficient at building.

Veniquins, which are elemental horses that live in fields and they're proficient at therapy.

We need one of those.

Aeromers, which are squirrel-like lemurs that live in treetops and they're proficient at reconnaissance.

That's the other one we can catch.

And Refibs, which are saurian quadrupeds with protruding bones that live near the lake, and they're proficient at medicine.

Uh-oh.

Maybe the refibs are good for the lochwid.

Yeah, but they don't sound as fun as a big ol' bear guy.

I figured you were going to go with Beniquin because you're a horse girl.

I was actually thinking Ethereal, the Defluen, so that way you could have me and Gigi.

Meow.

We gotta go to the water, though.

I mean, you do you.

Okay, so Elga picks up her ring, at least.

Same.

As you all are picking them up, Weezer says, Remember, each team has one hour to get their ingredient.

Then everyone meets back at the Awning Amphitheater due west.

Any questions?

Can we race?

If you turn into one thing, can you turn it and you don't like it?

Can you change into the other one?

Yes, the ring has two charges.

Okay.

Where are we meeting when we find our ingredients?

The Awning Amphitheater.

Where's the amphitheater?

You can't miss it.

It's due west from here once you're on the surface level again.

Is it amphitheater?

Because is it on the water front?

Yes.

It's amphitheater because it can be either in the water or on the land.

It is due west.

Okay.

Just hold the ring high above your head, say form of, and then the form you want.

Okay.

I put my ring towards a chip so we can touch rings while we do it.

Wonder

friends activate.

Ghost buddies.

Form of refib.

Or form of

form of form of devilins.

form of K-Miner, and form of Urstra.

With our powers combined, we are Sheath.

Captain Plan.

No!

At that point, a spiral staircase lowers from the ceiling, and you all make your way back upstairs to the surface.

Judging by the increased mugginess and shadows on the forest floor, it would appear to be early afternoon.

Didate and Siren transform into aromers and head into the trees along with other sheath agents.

Just to see who's gonna go first, one of each of you from the pair roll a d20 just to determine it.

16.

And we are a seven.

Okay, so we're going to go with Chipmunk first.

All the actions are happening at the same time, so we'll kind of cut back and forth.

I'm going to set a timer.

If things drag, we can keep going.

We make sure we keep going.

Okay?

We have 10 minutes each or until you accomplish it or whatever.

Cool.

We only need five.

You all were going for the Lockwood, correct?

Yes.

So you head over, you know, to Loch Sephness, which is incredibly easy to find.

And as you're approaching the shore of the lake, you see a refib wandering around.

Bonjour, bedren.

Oh, you're a refib, right?

Yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You startle her, and she looks up.

Oh, oh, hello there.

You must have snuck up on me.

Yes, I must have.

How are you doing today?

Good.

My name's Cobb.

What's your name?

Dob.

Dob, my brother's name is Dobb.

It's a beautiful name.

Yeah,

very, very common name.

Yes.

What are you all up to?

Just viewing the lake, you know.

Just kind of palling around.

Palling around.

Yeah.

Make a...

Both of you make a perception check.

17.

Ooh, 19.

Look at you.

Yeah, it didn't matter.

You should have been a cat this whole time.

Yeah, yeah.

Cobb says, I don't think I've seen you two here before.

Are you all new in town?

No.

Yeah, we're just from the other side of the lock.

The other side of the lock?

Uh-huh.

What's over there?

Oh, it's.

It's a phrase, you know, it's not actually literally the other side of the lock.

You know, it's like on the other side of town.

Yeah.

Make a deception check, chip.

Okay.

19.

Yeah.

Okay.

I just didn't realize there's anything over there.

I guess you must have your own cabin or something.

Yeah, you should come visit sometime.

Yeah, really?

Give me specific directions.

I'd love to.

Well, you look through the lock, get it across that lock, that's where we are.

Oh, okay.

You're just gonna have to come visit us sometime.

You notice as you're talking and you know, pointing and giving directions that Cobb seems to be carrying a crate, and there's another crate behind her on the ground.

What's in the crate?

What's in the box?

What's in the crate?

This, I'm sitting up to the corner cops just north of here.

I've got my uh ancestral remembrance tea.

Oh, yeah, yeah, I sell it there at the market.

How much?

How much?

Uh, well, depends.

What do you

have for trade?

Gold from the outside world, you know, but also some wares.

How much, you know, maybe we can bargain.

We'd love to support local business, you know, us being

from the lock.

Blaine just looked at me with the brightest eyes possible.

Don't have much use for gold.

Yeah, me neither.

That's why I'm trying to get rid of it.

Am I right?

I have a gemstone.

Say, where are your piercings?

That's a very good question.

I remember back.

I go, where are my piercings?

What happened?

Oh, no, no.

Dob, where'd your piercings go?

What about yours?

I didn't get your name.

Bob!

My name is Bob.

I remember back to the Deflins that we fought.

I did a slight of hand, a high five question on that one.

We fought those two Deflins.

Do I recall piercings on them?

Neither of us are Deflins.

I'm a Deflin.

Oh, you're a Deflin.

I'm a cat.

Make a wisdom check.

Okay.

God.

Oh, my God.

There's one.

I remember them too.

I'm going to do an inspiration die on that.

Okay.

Thank God.

17.

17.

You remember that one of the.

That's Bob yelling 17.

One of the defilons did have piercing.

Where was it?

The one that you saw had it on the ear.

Okay.

I spin around as if to be like, you know, like patent myself down.

And then in that moment,

your ear right now?

No,

I'll use.

okay.

I have a I have a disguise kit.

Can I like briefly just kind of like tap my body and then as I turn around, like slip like something under my ear?

Make a slide hand check.

Okay, all right, great.

That would be.

You gotta be high on this.

That's okay.

I got it.

No, I'm saying you are a rogue.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I'll be all right.

19.

Oh, okay.

You definitely, as a defilin, put a clip-on earring on.

Okay, and I turn around and say, oh, there it is.

Oh, I guess I didn't see it.

Yeah, you know.

Where's yours?

I don't wear one.

Stop talking.

I don't.

You're making it worse.

You're really just like, you found that hole and you're just digging in.

You're like, your head popped up for a second and then just immediately went right back down into it.

John also just articulated my feelings on most stinky dragons.

Stop talking, you're making it worse.

You don't know anything.

Just making conversation.

Conversation.

So, Dob, I guess you lost it.

Do you need help?

Here, let me look down.

I'll help you look.

And Cobb begins looking around on the ground.

And as she does so, she kind of loses grip on the crate of ancestral remembrance tea that she has.

And it drops to the ground.

And the crate cracks open, and the tea spills everywhere, including on you guys.

Both of you make dexterity saving throws.

Oh, it's like tea tea.

Yeah, that was for some reason.

My brain went like tea leaves.

So what's the save I'm doing?

Dexterity saving throws.

Oh, I'm that's an 18.

You say that, and you're gonna fail it.

22.

Yeah, the glass shards and liquid fly everywhere.

Both of you successfully make your saving throw.

So, you only take one point of damage from like the glass that hits you.

Oh, my mom, I'm so sorry.

Please, I need to do something to make this up to you.

Here, let me see what I have.

I'll give you something.

Okay, okay, Dob.

That's no worries.

Dob, Cobb, Cobb, your friend is Dob.

Yeah, sorry, I was

bonked on the head.

He's also into the lot.

Can I throw him?

Is your friend okay, Dob?

He's at a rough day.

He asked me about my piercings, which is just bizarre.

You asked me about my piercing.

Okay, all the other deathlins have been making fun of him lately, and he's going through a rough time.

And I thought bringing him down to the lock would be a nice little day to get him out, you know.

And so he's just a little off today.

Oh, you know how it goes.

Here, I'll tell you what.

If it's okay with you two, I'll give you a couple bottles of my ancestral remembrance tea.

Here, one each.

Oh, cool.

Yeah.

I'm so, again, so sorry.

That's okay.

Thank you so much.

What a gracious gift.

Ancestral remembrance.

I guess we'll have to figure out what this does later because I think asking right now would be a bad idea.

Yeah, yeah.

It's like

toilet.

Metagame-wise, it's a potion of guidance.

Oh,

we know that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm going to add that to my inventory then.

Okay, well, I have to hurry.

I have to get to the corner, Cobbs.

You two, stay safe out there.

May the mob be with you.

Oh, yes.

And with you.

See you later, Cob.

Yeah, Cobb begins marching off, carrying the crate to the north.

I turned the chip.

They go, nailed it.

Yeah, yeah, guys.

So good at this.

We should be agents of the regime.

Don't forget that I'm already one.

Oh, yeah, you're right.

Let's go get this liquid.

Potentially one of the oldest.

Maybe.

I found a chief.

You don't know.

Neither do you.

I don't.

You don't know.

Do you know?

Someone tell me.

All right.

Yeah.

You walk up and the lock is huge.

It's massive, lapping up against the shore there.

I'm going to take a pause there.

We'll switch to the other group at that point.

Paul?

We'll switch back over to Barney and Elga.

Do you all have a team name?

Team

Family Matters.

I call Urkel.

Did I do that?

You all walk to the outskirts of town and come upon the framed entrance of a mine in the side of a hill.

And we're doggies?

I'm a doggie, you're a bear.

I'm a bear.

Standing outside of the mine.

Standing outside of the mine is an elderly, decrepit K-miner with a pierced nose named Edgardo.

Why did I say it?

With a pierced nose.

He looks up at you and he kind of perks up.

Oh,

hello.

Hello there.

If we could guess your name, can I get it to the mine?

Is it Edgardo?

How did you know that?

What?

Witchcraft.

You could cut that if you want.

No, that stays in.

That's comedy gold.

Well, of course, you know, it's on my name tag right here.

Whoa.

Ed Gardo.

Yes.

Is that like Ed, but you're a guard of the mind, so it's Ed Gardo.

I never thought of it that way.

That's my name.

You are

Robert.

No, but close.

This is gonna go on forever.

Um,

Robaldo.

You got it!

Oh, Robaldo, good to meet you.

We're friends now.

Great talk show.

Oh, yes.

Would you care for a seat, Robaldo?

A seat?

Yeah, right next to me.

He pats the chair next to where he's sitting.

Okay.

We're just looking to get some iron.

Just, you know.

Oh, you came to the right place.

Cool.

Do you see?

This mine has all kinds of ores and minerals.

In fact, my grandson's down there right now.

He's a miner.

I'm waiting for him to get off working first shift.

You're making miners work?

Child labor.

Staring at Barbara.

That's pretty good.

Yeah, of course.

Where else do you expect miners to work, but in the mine?

Their small hands can get in there.

You're so cheaper.

As you're talking, a violet tremor begins shaking the ground.

Uh-oh.

Both of you make dexterity saving throws.

Do I get advantage on this?

Yeah, you would.

Okay.

18.

Oh, man.

Six.

That's worth advantage.

Robaldo, you manage to stay on your feet.

However, Elga, you fall to the ground.

The mine collapses with rocks falling into it.

Oh, no.

Charlie, you two.

You have to help me.

We have to save my grandson.

Now, Garth.

What was that?

That was my dog.

Mole voice.

Yes, we must save him and also get the iron we are looking for in the process.

Yes,

I'm sure the tremor freed it from the walls of the mine.

Could Elga get up and go to try to start clearing, I'm guessing, like fallen rocks and whatnot?

Good guarda says, wait, wait, before you do that, let us pray to the great Maw to give you the luck and the strength to successfully free the miners.

One of you, please recite your favorite proverb.

Oh, so many.

Favorite proverb?

Yes, of course.

Let's bow your heads.

This is, of course, from the divine breath, the wisdom from the maman tradition.

Another one with witches.

Can I do like a history check to see if I know any of this?

If not, I can just totally make a religion check.

15.

I like how you said that with such.

I was in customer.

It's not bad.

That's a good role.

I guess we don't have any modifiers, yeah.

Yeah, I'm going to send you one.

I was really hoping to hear Chris just.

I prefer to

be.

Behind the curtain, he's not gonna get the entire thing.

He's gonna have to improvise a little bit.

Okay, okay.

It's mad lips.

As the great bomb breathes, so do we live.

And in its exhale, we return to the

lake.

Edgardo's eyes open.

He looks up at you.

That's not how I remember it.

As it exhales, we return to the pale.

Blue light.

Why does she choose pale?

Just curious.

I don't know.

It's the new King James version.

As we do live,

as the Great Mob breathes, so do we live.

And in its sale, we return to the

death.

Well, my friend the air is just very shaken by the tremors.

Understood, understood.

He's just very nervous.

Of course, as the great mob breathes, so do we live.

And in its exhale, we return to the cosmic gorge.

Clearly.

Yes, that's what I was trying to to think of.

Yes, yes, apparently.

May the mall bless us and give us the strength to free those trapped.

Ama.

Ama!

Ama.

That's good.

That's good.

Alright, so Elga, you said you were going to go and try to start like sifting through the rubble.

Yeah, like clearing it out of the, I guess, opening.

Yeah, why don't you go ahead and make me a strength check?

Why not?

Net 20 and a 25.

Nice.

And as this dog miner thing that I am, do I have any abilities to like dig also well it's not that it transforms you into these um creatures it's more like a disguise so you you don't really have anything like it doesn't give you abilities right exactly you know it's very illusionary so like for example if it gave you an appendage that you don't actually have and someone went to like touch it they would just pass through the the things that we're proficient at in as these forms we aren't actually proficient at like in reality correct the those

those creatures have those proficiencies but you do not gotcha so what are you how are you going to approach it?

Barney, Elga said she was going to go up and start moving some of the rubble.

She got a 25 on that strength check.

Yeah, it's rock, not metal.

Correct.

Then I would just, I think I'd use my walker and like whack at it like a pickaxe, double-sided pickaxe thing.

Sure.

Make a strength check as well.

Rock and stone.

Oh, 30-20.

Nice.

Yeah, you both begin very quickly pulling out rocks and smashing them to bits and sifting it away.

Edgardo tries tries to help a little bit, but

he's pretty old.

He's kind of feeble, but he does his best to help out.

After a little bit of time, you all are able to clear enough way so that you can see some miners who are injured and trapped.

Could I reach them by any chance?

Yeah, you're able to.

You're kind of small.

You can scamper in there.

I want to pull him out.

Okay, yeah.

Make another strength check.

Dirty, 20.

Okay, yeah.

You grab on and you're able to lead some of the miners out, including Charlie.

Oh, thank Ma for you all.

We thought we were trapped in there for sure.

It's a good thing we prayed.

Oh, yes, indeed.

Oh, speaking of which, let's all recite another line

from

the divine breath.

Please, you saved us.

You lead us in prayer.

They all bow their heads.

Okay.

Feels like this town is just perpetually at church camp.

Yeah.

Can I also do a religion check?

Yeah, make a religion check.

Okay.

13.

Okay, I'll send you part of one.

Okay, we bow our heads to feed

on

our souls

is to nourish the soul.

In sacrifice, we find the essence of

ma.

They look at each other quizzically.

Maybe they got hit on the head a little harder than they realized when they were down below.

And Edgardo says, Oh, don't worry,

they're just a little exhausted.

Maman!

What?

What?

Amen, but maman.

Oh,

and then Edgardo continues.

To feed the great maw is to nourish the soul.

In sacrifice, we find the essence of devotion.

Yes, that is what I said.

Yes, yes, of course.

It sounds like maybe the trauma of almost losing your grandson made you hear different things.

Oh, wow.

Wow.

Okay, I just helped you out.

El goes into trauma, Blakey.

To feed the soul, what was that?

To feed, to feed the ma.

The great maw.

The great ma is to nourish the soul.

In sacrifice, we find the essence of devotion.

That's like that lake ritual where they just threw a bunch of bodies in the lake.

Midsummer.

As you finish up your prayer, Elga, you spot various pieces of ore amongst the debris and the rubble.

Could I pick it up?

Yeah.

We got the ore.

Or did we?

Could we pick some up?

Yeah.

You just did what you said a few episodes ago.

It was hard to do.

Laughing voice.

Could we take it back with us?

Yeah.

Where are y'all going again?

The amphitheater in town.

Due west.

All right.

Yeah, you all grab some more and make your way to the amphitheater.

We'll cut back to Chipmunk over there.

Yeah, so you two are standing at the edge of the lock.

Well,

guess you gotta get some lockwood.

I take a piece of rope and I wrap it around Chip and I throw him into the lake.

I am a cat.

I'm a cat, but Defling.

Air!

Air!

I'm fishing for the first time.

All right, yeah, so you tie the rope around Chip and toss him into the lock.

Yep.

Chip, make me a constitution saving throw.

Okay.

At 20.

22.

He was mad for the water.

Yeah, you get tossed into the lock with, and then I guess, Mateed, you pull him out.

Yeah.

Open your mouth.

I also have empty bottles from like the jar of the baboon and all that stuff.

You've also forgotten the last five minutes.

Your memory's just blank.

Who am I?

How long ago was our interaction?

I don't want to forget that.

It would be a little

the last five minutes is like your conversation with Cobb here at the

at the shore.

After you're back later.

Okay.

I don't know how I ended up in the water, but I guess, hey, I guess this is Lockwood.

So I start bottling it up.

Perfect.

And I reel him in.

Okay.

And make me a strength check just to pull Chip in.

That's a nine.

You don't have any.

Maybe because Chip's all wet,

there's a current that's pulling him out.

It's really hard.

And Chip,

with all the lock would you've bottled up, you begin slowly sinking into the lock.

Okay.

I start.

Maybe a constitution check to see if you're able to hold your breath, okay?

The plan is working.

Just to check the current breath.

Six.

Oh, 20's gone.

You're very quickly running out of breath.

You feel your strength being sapped from your muscles.

Not his muscles.

I make another pull.

Alright, make another poll.

Make another strength check.

Yeah, this is totally gonna be fine.

Rolled a one.

Make me another constitution check.

Is this a save or check?

Did you know that this is how you would die?

Would you roll?

What?

Ah!

You feel me?

You'll be with Carol soon.

The world closing down, blackness taking over your vision,

your vision only coming down to small points in front of your eyes.

I yell out, Chip, stop playing around and get over here.

I feel in peace.

No, no.

I'm fine.

Can I do another check?

You have, Chip, you have a vision of murky liquids swirling all around you.

Carol, I'm coming.

And you see silhouettes above you.

Angels?

Oh, it's like when I died.

Mateed, make another strength check.

And definitely no belt.

15.

Okay, maybe you weren't able to get a good grip on the rope or something, but finally you're able to grasp it well and you pull Chip out of the water onto the ground, and Chip is not breathing.

Here comes

yuck, mouth to mouth.

I saw Blaine take a very violent sip of his water, and then he's like, Yep, um, I do the

uh like chest compressions.

Oh, okay, uh, yeah, you uh, give Chip a couple of chest compressions, uh, make a medicine check.

I rolled a one

there, goes that rib.

It's five.

Uh, Chip spits out a bunch of water and pops it up

and you hear like a rib snap.

Oh, no.

Chip, you are back in the land of the living.

Indeed, I think I belly flopped into that lock.

I don't remember.

I go close to him.

I go, I saved you.

I owe you a wookie life debt.

Yes, you do, in fact.

Now, let me tell you about this friend named Cobb.

Tell me more.

What is my name in this situation?

Cobb is this mean referee fib who threw you into the lake

all right so you've got your lock width okay do my memories come back i love when a planet goes together but will they though uh oh i don't want to forget cobb what a lovely exchange all right so do you all head back to the amphitheater as well yeah to the east no

yeah we go we we want to go to the other side of the lock to see where we live oh right yeah yeah you eventually go around the entire world you'll get there um as you're walking to the amphitheater

your memories do start to come back, Chip.

Okay, after a while.

After gathering your respective ingredients, you all make haste through the sultry shrubbery until you each come upon what is clearly the awning amphitheater.

Shaded stadium seating carved from logs encircle an elephantine stump dressed in flowers.

Standing atop the stump stage is the alchemist with his back to you, looking at the sun-setting shores of the lock.

But you see no sign of the other sheath agents.

Vibe check!

Yeah, vibe check.

Vibe check!

Should we talk to him first?

Vibe check!

Jesus!

Make your vibe checks.

All that sugar's hitting everyone.

What is it, perception?

Insight.

They don't let you tell the story.

Oh, no, I've got a long block of green here.

That's fine.

Vibe check.

11.

23.

Something seems off.

The little hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and you hear a very slow clap.

Oh, no.

And high up in the shaded western stands, you see a dark figure rise from a seat in the very back.

Oh, how I love the theater.

The drama, the suspense, the twists!

And the figure steps forward into the light.

You see the pale man with blonde, curly hair wearing a top hat, black suit, and red ascot.

But he isn't alone.

Ah, the what is an outing without family?

Right, father?

And to the north, you see a young girl with piercing blue eyes emerge from shady leaves.

She curtsies her silk, black, and blue dress, then yanks on a translucent chain, and an elvish woman in navy cloak falls to the ground, bound in see-through shackles and gagged with a red ascot.

A third voice calls from the south.

Personally, I come for the comedy,

but I stay for the tragedy.

You turn to see a green-eyed, skinless figure take to the stage and quickly kick the alchemist to his knees.

Eddie grips the man's neck with a clawed hand, his jagged smile never fading.

Now, everyone, take a seat and let's enjoy the grand finale!

Oh man.

I yell at Evaina.

I'm gonna send you to another realm permanently.

Wait, do they?

Are we still doggies?

A mole.

Am I a mole?

After all that, Chris, like, are we still doggies?

Find out what that means in the next episode of Tales of the Stinky Dragon.

Did you know you can directly support the show by becoming a patron at patreon.com slash stinky dragon?

Patrons like at JoeMan20xt,

at Natalie Feston, at Suze, at Patrick Movie, and at Ethan Saletti.

For as little as $5 a month, these patrons directly support the show and get ad-free episodes, access to our patron-only Discord server, bonus content like Second Win and Behind the Screen, and coming soon in July, Sea Squad, a superhero DD miniseries.

Not a patron yet?

Here's a taste of what you're missing.

Gus, why don't you introduce yourself?

Oh my god, you found me.

Hi.

You're Madeline, right?

I'm Aeneas.

You probably don't know me.

Aeneas?

Is that like actually a real name?

Yeah.

You can call me Dorcas.

Everyone calls me Dorkus.

Wow, that's really not that much better.

Well, kids make fun of Aeneas.

And not Dorkius?

Well, they gave me the name Dorcius, and I don't think it was with good intentions.

Well, are you also like waiting for this bus?

Yeah.

I kind of wish they would get here.

Yeah, if you could just like, I guess, stay like five feet away from me or something.

Like, I don't want people to think that we're friends.

We're like, we know each other.

I get it.

I get it.

That's why I'm in the bush.

Dorkius, or Gus.

It's okay.

You can call Gus Dorkius as well.

Again, that's patreon.com slash stinky dragon.

We can't thank you enough for your support that lets us make this show.

This week's error question was submitted by Chaz Surfboard on Discord.

Here's some NPCs in this episode that were submitted by or named after patrons.

Siren the Steam Golem, named for technically Siren.

Edgardo the caved in K-miner named by Navidude.

Charlie the Kid K-miner named after Sticky Charles.

And Cobb the Recompensing Refib, named after Cobbo.

Also, want to thank some friends who provided voiceover for characters in this episode, like The Alchemist, voiced by Blizz, at Blizz Bear, Eddie, voiced by Andrew Rosas, at Mr.

Andrew Rosas, Evaina von Brath is voiced by Kristen Nelson at Kristenalin, Hugo von Brath voiced by Trevor Collins at underscore Trevor C, Siddati Tempor voiced by Patty Reisinger, and Weezer voiced by Micah Reisinger at Micah Reisinger.

This episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon was produced by Ben Ernst, written, edited, and composed by Micah Reisinger.

Head over to patreon.com/slash stinky dragon for all things stinky.

Tune in next time for another thrilling episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon.

PSA to all young'ins listening.

But we've got to reclassify this podcast as educational.

Hope you

get on that right now.

Take that in PR.

That literally is cert coming out of my mouth.

And PR.

Public funded.

We can't compete with that.

We're not even funded.

Elite basketball returns to the Elite Caribbean destination.

It's the 2025 Battle for Atlantis men's tournament happening November 26th to 28th.

Don't miss hometown team St.

Mary's, along with Colorado State, Vanderbilt, Virginia Tech, Western Kentucky, South Florida, VCU, and Wichita State, playing 12 games over three days.

It's basketball at its best, plus everything Atlantis has to offer.

Aqua Venture Water Park, White Sand Beaches, World Class Dining, and more.

Get your tickets and accommodations at battleforatlantis.com.

Witness the mountain majesty and rich creative culture of Colorado's heartland and Fort Collins.

The perfect place for your last-minute summer getaway.

Hike or bike around Horsetooth Reservoir and explore beautiful scenery on more than 280 miles of trails.

Finishing with a pint at one of Fort Collins' many local breweries.

Listen to live music at venues like the iconic Mishawaka Amphitheater and all summer with free outdoor concerts happening weekly.

Start your adventure and plan your visit now at visitfortcollins.com.