Ep. 103 – Post premier production emergency

You got the VPN, the encrypted messenger, the private browser?

But if your mobile carrier is selling your data, those apps are just window dressing.

Meet Cape, the mobile carrier that never collects your name, address, or data.

Because what they don't store, they can't sell.

Premium service, nationwide coverage, CAPE is just $99 a month.

Your first month is just $30.

And with code CAPE33Off, you'll save 33% on your first six months.

Go to Cape.co, lock down your network, not just your apps.

Ready to elevate your wardrobe?

Check out Bohm, where fashion meets fun.

From trendy dresses and chic tops to versatile denim and cozy sweaters, Bohm has it all.

With great quality, affordable prices and freshly picked new arrivals every week, you'll always find something new and exciting.

Plus, our accessories collection will add the perfect finishing touch to any outfit.

Whether you're dressing up for a special occasion or keeping it casual, Bohm has the perfect pieces to match your style.

Head over to Bohm.com today and start your style journey with Bohm.

Your perfect outfit is just a click away.

Good evening, everyone, or afternoon, I should say.

A day early, too, because I'm just going to upload this now so I don't have to deal with it tomorrow.

Are you going to put the video up on YouTube?

If I can get the card out of the camera in time.

And

it's a ticking time bomb.

Well, yeah, I mean, I gotta go catch a flight.

Nick and I both have flights this evening out of town.

So this is something a little bit like this is like behind the scenes.

The audience can tell we're not wearing our traditional Armani suits.

I don't know if it's behind the scenes or not.

Well, we're on the scenes.

There's not many scenes anymore.

It's mostly behind.

Yes.

We're behind.

Yeah.

Look, folks, a couple of things.

Right off the top, welcome to the Adam Friedland Show.

We're going one

camera angle.

Yeah, for this episode, we're going to be going one camera angle.

One camera angle until

we need to hire a bunch of people.

Yeah.

We are talking to a bunch of people right now that we're about to hire.

We're talking to one guy we got that fixes one problem.

There's one other guy that we got.

But

there's no way this show is going to happen.

It can't just be the two of us.

Listen, folks, you've been our friends for some time.

If you know a guy,

if anyone knows a guy that knows how to make a TV show,

send him our way.

Okay, think about this.

Please, not somebody that starts a story with, I was in a brain hospital for six months.

Yeah, I was in a brain hospital, and I've been waiting for this moment for the last couple of years of my life.

Not one of those guys.

Not one of those guys.

Preferably.

He's a very nice guy.

Yes, he was.

But you know what we need is a guy that

hates us and thinks the show he doesn't like it.

We needed somebody that's just good at their job.

Yeah, like

an old guy that doesn't laugh at a single thing we say.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like an old Hollywood.

Look, folks.

Someone that, when he gets pissed at us, will have us molested.

The rumors are true.

The Adam Friedland show is a disaster.

No, it's not.

Shut up.

But look, like every disaster, the tornado comes through, destroys the town, kills many, you know, impoverished, white, trash people.

Yeah.

It ruins their day.

Because all they have.

This show is a lot like a double-wide trailer, basically.

It's a thing for

just trash people.

I think you're painting it a little bit more dire.

But I'll tell you, you know what happens?

I think.

You know what happens after the tornado?

Yeah.

Fucking Wonderland.

Yeah, Alice in Wonderland.

Is it called?

You're in Wonderland now.

Yeah, you go to Alice in Wonderland.

Yeah.

So let's just see how far the rabbits pussy goes.

Let's take that fucking pill, dude.

Yeah.

No, folks, we are.

Look, there was a, and this is, I'll be sincere.

There was a decision that had to be made.

We could continue kicking the can down the road forever.

But I said, and this is 100% my fault, I said, let's just show them the set.

It doesn't matter that

it doesn't matter that we have nothing prepared.

Yes.

But my, this is what I did not know.

I thought you bring a guy in here, he tells you where to put lights, the lights go up, and that's it.

That's static.

And that's not how it works.

That's not how it works.

There's a million people that are all experts at lighting, and they all have a different idea of how they want it to be.

Right.

And I'm too autistic to be around that.

No.

We have to keep

away from the technical people.

You have to keep away from them.

We really have to, like, it has to be like a separation of church and state.

We have to have a strong wall, a divide.

Yeah.

Because, like, Nick, you've, I mean, some, I don't want to brag about my friend.

I want to be like a Jewish mother, but Nick, in the last

three months, has been become quite an expert on how to construct and frame shots, on color correction.

He's taught himself how to edit.

He's taught himself.

We had to.

Look, our editor quit the night before.

Yes, because he was.

Because somebody spread a rumor that he has AIDS.

Our editor's ex-girlfriend was spreading a rumor that he had.

That was insane, dude.

He came over here like, I thought he was about to be like, I found I have liver cancer.

I thought our friend was dying.

It was a fake excuse.

The look on his face, dude.

I was about to cry.

Can we agree that

it was a fake excuse?

Yeah, that's bullshit.

It doesn't make any sense.

No, no, no.

It's a 38-year-old man saying that someone's spreading a middle school rumor about him.

He's coming back on board.

I talked to him.

Oh, okay.

He just needed to take a week or two off.

And for the last week or two, Nick has had to decide to teach himself how to use it.

There was no one else to do it.

Editing Starboard because we had no one else.

The episode had to go up on Halloween.

Yeah.

It wouldn't make any sense if it weren't on Halloween.

And an important part of this show is that it makes sense.

You know what I mean?

That's what they tune in for.

Yeah, they tune in for a show that makes sense.

So, look,

I made the wrong call.

I thought it was just that one fat guy from Patreon that came by that didn't like the set.

Turns out it's everybody.

No.

It seems that no one who watches this show has any idea what the Dick Havitt show is.

No.

None of them have ever heard of it.

The reference was lost on pretty much everyone.

Yeah.

And no one was like, wow.

Yeah.

Wow.

It's also too.

They approximated.

The only reason.

They got the same fucking time-life lobby chairs that Dick Havitt had.

We got four chairs from 1975, vintage chairs,

and Nick matched the leather,

only to find out that Dick Cabot used cheap reproductions.

Knockoff chairs, yeah.

We got nicer chairs than Cabot had on his set.

I didn't realize that until I had to find these chairs.

Until we spent $16,000.

Yeah.

Shout out to D-Rose Mod on eBay for, well, selling us the chairs.

Yeah.

I don't know, but whatever.

Free advertising for him, I guess.

Also, shout out to Co-op Fabrication,

who are our friends who built the sets.

This beautiful set that you probably won't ever see framed correctly.

And

they do an incredible job.

Anyway, so yeah, so no, we're at the point now where

we're hiring staff and we're interviewing people.

It should have happened months ago.

It should have happened months ago.

I knew it would happen.

I said to myself, no, I'll be able to do it.

I'll be able to go on the road every weekend and make a TV show.

And what happened is I got obsessive about lighting stuff.

And camera stuff.

And then didn't

forgot to write any jokes.

Okay, so here's the thing.

So here's the plan, folks.

Updating our audience, because the number one thing that we pride ourselves on is transparency.

Is that correct?

Trans issues, yeah.

Trans issues, transparency.

Trans people should be able to adopt.

Trans people should be able to vote.

That's what my number one issue is transparency.

That was good.

Oh, thanks.

Anyway, so

yeah, no, we do have guests lined up.

The talk show is going forward.

Do you get to name a joke?

They made a joke on paper.

Real quick, real quick.

Wait, if you get to adopt,

if you adopt children, are you allowed to rename them like a dog or a cat?

Yeah.

So I could adopt two black kids and name them Moesha and Corey in the house?

Could I do that?

Is that against the law?

No, technically,

if gay people are allowed to adopt

straight kids,

I should be allowed to adopt Moisha and Corey in the house.

Yeah, no, I'm going to adopt a black guy and name him.

And then when he's in trouble, I use his full name.

Like, no, I'm like, hey, Corey, but when he's in trouble, I'm like, Corey in the house.

Go to your room.

I'm going to adopt a black son and name him Smart Guy.

Yeah.

Smart Guy Freeland.

That's cool.

Yeah, Taj.

Taj Taj.

Did you want to clarify the thing I said about the show being canceled?

Yeah, we have to clarify this.

Nick made a joke on the Patreon yesterday that we were recreating.

We're putting the show on hold for four months.

That's not happening.

It was clearly, obviously.

That's not on Nick.

That's on you guys for being fucking retarded.

I'm glad you're saying it's not on me.

I said that to you on text yesterday.

I felt I was hurt.

Listen.

That's clearly on you guys for being retarded.

Also, purported fans of comedy when Nick is clearly making a joke.

But, yes, we can't see.

I can't light this and camera.

Fuck around with me and find out.

I will cancel this show and remake my book.

We're balls deep in this process.

Here's the thing: we are

to find guys that we're balls deep in this process, but in like a booyah sense.

Yes.

You know, we're like the audience is a white woman.

We're a black man, and we said we're going to have sex with you, which is what the

testicles are.

And I see her show.

and we put our balls in her ass yeah and she's like penises in her vagina she's like okay but where's the talk show and then we go boo yeah

glen gary glenn ross shot for shot remake all right oh the shows we have we're we have

basically what's happening is we need to find someone else to do the lights and the cameras but the show is going for it don't worry guys more than that we need a producer We need a producer.

We're going to talk to Dave today.

I already got, and then I'd like the only thing I need to be handling is putting a room together for Mars.

And then we have writers that are coming in as well, that Nick is in.

I got my killers, dude.

Yeah.

The League of Extraordinarily Canceled Gentlemen.

The the thing is, is that

we wanted to stop working with the Sweater Brothers after the allegations came out, but we've decided that we're going to move forward with them and we're just going to credit them under a gnome de guerre.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Did they say what they want their names to be in the credits?

The Izod, brother.

Footsteps in the dark.

Now I'm annoyed.

I've got these X because we have to run and catch these flights.

I got this XLR cable, the right angle one.

Why did you get that one?

I don't know, but it makes me feel like a

Popeye.

Oh, no.

Hold it like a gun, like you're going to shoot yourself in the mouth.

Yeah, that's badass.

Dude, that's cool, man.

Do you think anybody does this?

Do people do this as the sideways gun?

The sideways gun anymore?

To kill themselves?

Yeah.

Well, I mean, I guess you kind of have to.

Yeah, no.

No, honestly, this is...

The cool thing about this show, I think, and this process, and I hope this is, I mean, it's cool for me.

I hope it's been cool for the audience.

But the cool thing is to see two men, right,

who were on the lowest ever.

We're just young guys figuring it out.

We're literally 43

two young guys figuring stuff out yeah two bright-eyed young dreamers no to see two just getting our money taken from us but being fleeced by nyu students here's it here's the thing come to help us out and they don't they they're even they disappear

yeah um

you what but narratively speaking what you see is you see the two guys who are on the lowest effort

and slash quite successful comedy podcast whose friend became

whose friend left to do crowd work

and then we and now we are and then we made a public

a public proclamation that we were making a full-fledged television show that's the other thing that's annoying about this look I didn't realize that is narratively I think that is very interesting sure but I didn't realize it was going to take two and a half to three months to get this to get the set built alone.

I thought it would take.

Danny told me a week and a half.

Danny was on Ketemy.

Danny is on Ketemy.

Danny also was like, hey, are you going to pay me?

And he had been sending invoices to an email address.

He's like, I've been emailing NickMullenAdam FriedlandShow at gmail.com.

The first guy we hired to build the set.

Don't register that email and try to get money out of Danny, by the way.

No, the first guy

that we hired to do the set,

we were asking for designs and a quote for weeks.

And I would call him and we'd have conversations, and I'd talk to him the next day, and I'd be like, so yeah, anyway, we were talking last night, and he was like, what do you mean we were talking?

And he was like, sorry, dude, I was on too much cake.

Well, the thing is,

I didn't think the joke, the joke,

building this set is a joke.

And the joke was going on Jim and Sam and saying that you're going to create a talk show like no one's ever seen before.

Yes.

And then you rebuild

quite possibly

the most nondescript set

from the longest-running talk show.

Yeah, something goes on in the era.

It's a quick...

In whatever iteration for 40 years.

It was a quick visual joke.

It was not supposed to take too long.

And we thought that the joke would be a razzle-dazzle.

No, no, no.

We thought we were a piece of

it.

So what's happening in your mind is everybody who's watching, they're building their own set in their head and they're imagining like a they think there's going to be like a basketball hoop back there.

Yeah, yeah.

They think there's going to be like the skyline of Hong Kong and a basketball hoop.

Yeah.

Ska posters.

But I'll tell you what, I like this.

This is way better.

I love this set.

This is a great set.

I don't give a fuck what anyone says.

I think this is gorgeous.

We should post photos from just the iPhone back there because you guys really don't understand this sense of it.

It is really beautiful.

It's really nice.

Yeah, I mean, like, and honestly, I think just narratively speaking,

seeing us go through this process and then seeing us, you know, trip up and then seeing us learn important lessons, I think for an audience, I think that that's something to be appreciated.

But,

yeah, we are moving forward.

Nick was just making a joke on but this, I think this is very instructive for our audience because I think that this is they they really care about

About how you know, about how this process has has gone.

Look, we'll have a talk show.

Did you just get a text in the picture as a naked woman?

No, it's actually Kurt Metzger and his.

What is it?

Like his iCloud image is him as a mermaid.

Oh, it's him?

Yeah.

From here on your Apple Watch, it looked like a nude woman.

Yeah.

Okay, perfect.

I keep all my contacts of women as just their breasts.

Yeah.

So I remember all the breasts of my master.

Kurt's getting the guy.

Kurt's getting the fellas, dude.

Dude, Kurt's getting the guys together.

This is a sling blade.

I'm calling the band up.

Yeah, we're getting the band back together.

Oh, fuck it.

I'm calling the band, dude.

Yeah.

We're getting professional TV writers.

We're getting producers now.

I guarantee you, I promise you, I will corral myself just in that world and not overstep my bounds and try to make Glenn Gary Glenn Ross, even though that is what I want.

No, Nick, what we have to do is if we're here on this set,

we have to make this real.

We will.

We will make it real.

And then

once this is done,

once this is like we have a weekly talk show,

we have a guest, we need a guest booker.

We need a talent booker that has the calendar filled.

We got three weeks' lead time with guests.

We can construct

an interview for you.

There's a roadmap.

It's not you just asking the same question about Kanye and giggling regardless of who's on.

Well, I just want to know what people think about what Kanye is doing.

No more of that, dude.

But I should know if I'm saying that.

We're going to figure out how to, we're going to turn you into Mike Wallace, one way or the other.

It's going to happen.

Jewish Mike Wallace.

Yeah.

Mike Wallitz.

Mike Wallitz.

Mike Wallowitz.

Yeah.

No, Wallitz, where you put your money.

Yeah.

Oh, okay.

Mike Wallitz.

That's the pun.

That was slow.

Yeah.

That's the stuff I need to be doing, dude.

I need to be in a room with other racist men

and one Indian lady.

Yeah.

Just so beautiful.

Yeah.

Gorgeous.

Princess Jasmine.

We can't stop looking at her.

And we kept calling her Princess Jasmine until she sueses.

She's like up from India.

Until she sues Agrava.

Funny Moms International.

Why my LLC?

Because I'm hiring people under your company.

Okay, cool.

For

liability.

Yes.

Liability.

As long as I'll let you control the camera.

Then I handle the

money side.

I handle the money side, and you'll take care of all the liability stuff.

I figured since you were a lawyer, you'd prefer that i'm not a i never went to law school yeah anyway but that's the thing look i got two more weekends i'm in san francisco at copbs this weekend you can go get tickets and then i will thank you to everyone who came out to law school i will be at the goobies next weekend and after i'm done with the road i don't need to drink anymore you know because i'm only i'm only i'm only off the wagon i swear you're losing them i thought we were making a good play

i thought this was a good appeal to the audience the people that care about us yeah no i I mean it.

Look, I need to.

Look, there's just no way to do stand-up if you're not drunk.

I've tried for a decade.

It's just not.

It's not the same.

It's bizarre.

Honestly, it feels terrible.

It's fucking bizarre.

If you don't have a drink or two, it feels terrible.

It doesn't feel terrible.

It feels unnatural.

Everyone else is drunk.

Yeah, everyone else is drunk.

You're trying to talk to a drunk person.

And if you're not drunk also, what are you going to...

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

I mean that.

And that's not something, look, no fucking sponsor can tell you otherwise.

You know what I mean?

No sponsor.

Not yet.

I got an eye on it, though.

You got it.

You got it.

Stop.

Stop watching.

Yeah.

What's that?

What do you think?

I thought the Racine thing that we did,

everyone thought it was...

If we're doing a peek behind the curtain, everyone thought that was real sweat.

I thought that was like real...

Movie magic that we did there.

It was movie magic.

Yeah.

And I really had to climb on that ladder.

Yeah, it was pretty cool.

I had to pull my pants down and climb up that ladder.

Right.

We had to have a safety meeting, folks.

On set safety meeting.

We got to start doing those safety meetings.

Yeah.

I want to leave the safety meetings with the crew.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's my responsibility.

Hosted safety meetings.

Adam Safety first Friedland.

Yeah.

The Dean of Safety.

Yeah.

Dean is such a little, like, weenie middle name.

Dean.

Oh, I think I'm a.

My son's going to be a little worm, man.

How would they know?

I guess the name made the man.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It was so funny.

Another peek behind the curtain.

We had a massive celebrity come to the studio on Sunday.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I'm not going to say anything beyond that.

No, no, no, no.

But from the get-go, they walked in to see the mess.

And him and his personal videographer just started cleaning our studio for us.

Well, everybody that does that comes in here and cleans.

Yeah, no, more than that, we need a girl.

We do.

We need a girl.

And we got to stop.

There's just every time a girl walks in the studio, she starts.

The mice keep chewing on things in here, too.

We have mice.

We have a mice problem in the studio.

Listen, folks,

this is kind of fun.

Yeah, I think.

It's a lot of fun, dude.

And honestly, it is fun.

We get pissed all the time.

It's like, look,

it's at the very least, it's got to be fun for at least us.

If it's not fun, it's not worth it.

You're right, exactly.

That's the only thing you got to worry about in life.

Having fun, and you know, if you can take care of your family, great.

And if you can't, you know, they can figure their own shit out.

Yeah.

Have fun and find a way to assassinate a government official.

Yeah.

Yeah.

There's three two things you should be worried about.

We should do more like, because now that we're on YouTube, we should do more like you guys, you can do anything you want as long as you have a

self-help stuff?

Yeah.

All you got to do is put your fucking dumbass mind to it, and then you can do whatever you want.

What's today?

The 9th?

Yeah.

No, no, no.

Today's the 8th.

The 8th.

So today's episode is brought to you by

Super Speciosa.

Tomorrow is the 9th.

Yeah, okay.

Super Spatios.

That's how it works.

Super Speciosa.

Super OGX.

Super Speciosa is

Kratom.

It is Kratom, in fact.

It's Kratom from Southeast Asia.

It's shit that makes you feel it makes you feel right, dude.

And maybe I'll pick some of that up to assist me with

production.

What's that?

To help you with production.

Yeah, to help me wean off the fucking.

You know what?

I tell you, what's nice about

starting drinking again in your 30s is

oh, so the website doesn't work anymore.

Super speciosa.com.

I really can't.

The hangovers are a fucking nightmare, dude.

I'll have two beers, and I'm like, just you were always a lightweight, though.

But I didn't get bad hangovers.

Yeah, you were a younger man.

Yeah.

That's just something that comes with age.

But you would always have like three beers and be like, I fucking love you.

Dude, okay.

No, honestly, it's literally, it was even before that.

I have like, I'll have three sips of beer and then it just fixes my personality.

It's just literally, whatever the fuck is wrong with me is just when Brandon Wordeaux was in town, he was like, he's been afraid of you for 10 years.

And you had a beer.

And he was like, he's so sweet.

He's just such a nice guy.

All right, here we go.

Superspeciosa.com.

Pure Kratom, engineered by nature, made by nature, perfected

by them.

3,4,5 star reviews.

That's pretty fucking good.

That's weird to have that, I guess.

Why super?

Because they do things right.

Since 2016, they've been perfecting certifiably reliable ways to bring you kratom as it was intended.

Unaltered, untouched, uncompromised.

They have top sellers, green,

mae young da kratom powder, red

maeung da kratom powder.

Signature reserve.

Thai just kind of sounds like deaf Chinese.

Yeah.

Meng da da da da da da.

No, no, this is Indonesian.

That's the same.

Yeah.

Family of languages.

It's Muslim Thai.

Indonesiac.

Indonesiac.

Indonesiac.

White, Mayong Da, Kratom Capitals.

Listen, guys.

They have these.

The green, the red, and the white,

they do different things.

The red shit makes it

easy, does it.

The green is crystal clear focused.

It makes you fucking like

you're on

like that pill from Limitless.

Have you seen that movie?

It's a movie about, I think, just Adderall, basically.

But it's like, yeah, a pill that he used.

It's a movie about Adderall.

It's a movie about where

he finds a pill where he can use 100% of his brain.

Bradley Cooper.

Isn't that just a line from fucking Defending Your Life?

What is that?

In Defending Your Life, fucking Riptor's like, you want to know what percentage of your brain fucking person uses?

3%.

And then he goes, you know, or he says, I use 47%.

There's some fucking line.

Do you like that movie?

I love that movie, dude.

I love Albert Brooks.

I love Albert Brooks.

Yeah, he's great.

Yeah, he is really good.

Genuine artist.

Real heart, that guy has.

Yeah, he looks a lot like Phil.

He does.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Shout out to my friend Phil.

Congratulations on Phil.

Phil just gets more and more handsome every year.

Yeah, Phil is really handsome.

I mean, it's shocking now.

Yeah, he looks great.

Yeah, because they tell you as a man, they're like, oh, yeah, men age gracefully.

And then we like, I just look like fucking shit now, and I feel like shit.

And

it's just going to get worse and worse.

You look fine.

I feel like I'm body dysmorphia no I mean I just feel that's half of the thing that's holding us back in this project is your editing and looking at your face and being like I want a fucking shoebox well it doesn't look funny and it don't look I don't look like I'm having a good time what's

you're you're incredibly handsome no but it doesn't I don't one of the funniest people in America I don't look like I'm having a good time all right and that's what uh and I'm not so you know that's part of it but

yeah Phil just because that guy you know he was real goofball Yeah, he was a little bit ten years ago.

Goof type Jew.

Real

ugly duckling.

Yeah, no, he looks fantastic.

He's gotten really into the story about me is about one of the other ducks that's like not particularly attractive, sort of just like a faggot.

No, no, you were like.

And he gets older, and then nothing happens.

He just gets shittier.

He deserves a drinking.

This mediocre duck that you're doing.

Do you remember that guy we saw yesterday?

Huh?

The middle-aged guy we saw yesterday on the street?

No.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Why do we both start playing?

I don't know, dude.

That's just Like his body told an entire story.

That's the best.

Oh, by the way, super super speciosa.com products.

As Kratom gains more popularity, more vendors are providing Kratom products of varying quality.

Find out about good manufacturing pri practices and the

and at superspeciosa.com, Adam's sneezing.

Sorry, it's dusty.

And we have mouse.

It's dusty again.

Yeah, there's mouse shit all over the place.

Anyway, so

guys, go to superspeciosa.com, put in the promo code.

What is it?

Come town, Cometown20, or T-A-F-S.

And get perked up on plants.

You deserve the highest quality products and service.

They strive to give you that at every step.

Find out more at superspeciosa.com.

Super speciosa.

This shit is objectively good for you.

What are we talking about?

Look at how long this, like...

The disclaimer is.

The disclaimer is at the bottom.

Yeah, we'll leave that.

These statements and products have been presented on this website.

These These statements and products presented on this website have not been evaluated by the FDA.

The products mentioned on this website are not intended to diagnose

cure diseases from kratom.

No, no, no.

Just crossing my legs.

Now, this one's like...

Oh, you're trying to copy me.

I can't move.

Yeah, you can't live that life, dude.

You can't sit gay.

Why the fuck does your body do that?

What the fuck is pins and needles?

Why does that happen?

Pins and needles?

Yeah.

That's what you get for sitting gay, you fucking asshole.

That's what your leg's doing.

God punishing you for being.

Sit normal, you fucking freak.

Just being stabbed in your nerve root for fucking...

It sucks.

Pins and needles suck.

Yeah, it's the worst.

Do you ever get it?

Do you know what I used to do all the time?

Is I would sit on the toilet too long, staring at my phone, and

my legs would go so asleep

that I'd get up and just fall f face forward

with my pants down.

Yeah.

I like to take a 90-10.

I can't even do that.

And I'm like, 90%

chill, 10% action.

I'm going to make a TV show.

Yeah.

And then after that, learn how to go to the bathroom.

What are you talking about?

Oh, that guy we saw yesterday.

The guy we saw, but I saw a good thing earlier today, just the homeless guy who had one of these.

You guys are familiar with the vape pen, but he was smoking.

He put his entire mouth.

And you see that, and you're like, well, I guess that's why that guy's homeless.

Because he can't figure out basic things.

He opens doors with his mouth.

He can't figure out

basic.

Yeah, that's so funny.

That would be very funny.

God bless that guy.

To try to open a doorknob with your mouth.

Don't enter the food bag, New York, Bernie Sanders, whatever.

Yeah, whatever, dude.

Oh, yeah.

It's Super Tuesday today, Election Day.

What are your predictions?

I don't know.

Are you voting?

I'm not voting.

I got to support.

You can't have that Jew from Suffolk County become the governor.

Lee Zedlin.

We can't have

that crazy man.

I got to support Ho Chill.

I'm not voting.

No.

Well, our predictions for Election Day, this is coming out tomorrow or maybe today,

but I'm predicting a blue wave.

Democrats sweep the board.

In fact, advance.

Your

leaking.

Where?

I don't know.

Normally I wouldn't say anything, but you have just like fluid leaking out of your nose.

I just sneeze all over it.

Can I get a Kleenex?

No.

I mean, I would get what you want, but we don't have Kleenexes.

Yeah, we don't.

I steal toilet paper from the bathroom of our building.

Anyway.

Don't say that.

Don't be on record saying that.

I

on Minecraft.

Oh, okay.

That's a cool one to do.

You're in court on trial, and they're like, did you rape this young woman?

You're like, yeah, in Minecraft.

In Minecraft.

And the juror's like, innocent.

Innocent.

Yeah.

This guy's cool, innocent.

This guy's based innocent.

Innocent.

Yeah, in Minecraft.

In Minecraft.

Yeah.

What is Minecraft?

It's like blocks.

There's a book Hitler wrote about

his problems.

What did he say?

In the book Minecraft.

Minecraft that Hitler wrote?

Yeah.

Minecraft.

Yeah, Minecraft.

That's very good.

Hey, thanks.

You just fucking.

I know.

That's why you got to be in that writer's room.

Sweater Brothers current bedskirt.

I can't do these lights anymore, dude.

I can't do the fucking lights anymore.

I'm not.

I'm just, I'm a broadcast.

He takes it so seriously, guys.

Broadcaster.

I can't help myself, dude.

You know me.

I'm a fixer.

Honestly, out of all the feedback we got after the first episode with Shane, when Nick read the things about the lights, he ordered a pop bomb.

I think Ed did a good job, dude.

Yeah, Ed did a great job.

Oh, the color correct?

Yeah, coloring it and crafting a, you know, kind of.

I completely agree.

Well, I mean, what we did, we gave him still, he took stills from Dick Habitt and tried to match that.

Yeah.

And if you look at Dick Habitt, it looks kind of like a clown's asshole.

It does.

It does look very good.

Yeah, it's very, it's like s just smudgy and blown out.

Yeah.

But what we see of the Dick Habit show is from

it reposts on YouTube.

So that

so we're going to do something different.

We're going to go stylized.

Yeah, we're going to go super stylized.

Yeah, we're going to do something.

We're going to have to make the Adam Friedland show look like the Adam Friedland show.

Yeah.

Yeah, fuck have it.

So in 20 years.

25 years.

Yeah.

25 years.

When we put out the first official episode.

We're long dead.

There's somebody that's like, we're going to remake the Adam Friedland show.

Yeah.

But this time it's going to be good instead of a piece of shit.

No, don't get down on yourself.

I'm not down on yourself.

It's just, you know, everything has a shelf life.

I've made it.

It has shelf life.

We put out three episodes.

Two episodes.

No, no, but I mean, comedy and judge.

That's how comedy works.

Yeah, of course.

Nothing is funny.

We all know that.

It's fucking like Mark Twain is the only guy who's ever done anything that's still funny a hundred years later.

That's true.

It is still funny.

Yeah.

And it's only because he fucking just

words.

Yeah, exactly.

He knew the

classic bit.

Yeah.

Calling a guy named Jim.

Yeah, the Pandora's box of punchlines.

You just, all throughout history, you open that word and ghosts come out and...

Like the, yeah, like Ghostbusters.

Well, like the Pandora's Box and...

Yeah, like...

Is it Pandora's Box and Raiders of the Lost Ark?

Or it's the Ark of the Covenant?

Is that the same thing as Pandora's Box?

There's too many boxes that shit comes out of.

That's right.

You got Xbox.

You got Pandora's Box.

Yeah.

You got a

Barrel of Monkeys.

Yeah, that's right.

That game.

Yeah.

The children's children's game.

Yeah.

How did that game even work?

I think you had to link the monkeys' arms into a long chain.

But then, how is that a game?

I don't know.

That's not a game.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Sometimes you can get away with just packaging.

That's what we're trying to do with the Adam Friedland show.

Yeah, we're trying to make the packaging.

We're trying to make banana grams.

We're trying to do Razzmatazz.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Razzle Dazzle.

Yeah.

So what the hell is this black Adam thing?

Are we suing them

for copyright infringement?

It hurts.

Yeah.

But I'm just focused on the show right now.

I don't want to get tied up in the litigation.

Yeah.

I mean, I have a case.

Yeah.

I talked to Gloria Allred.

Yeah.

Yeah.

She's a lawyer for women.

Gloria Allright.

Gloria Allright.

Gloria.

Okay.

It's a black lady lawyer named Gloria Okay.

Okay.

Gloria, okay.

Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Is she still around with Gloria Allred?

Yeah.

I don't know.

What does she do again?

She was a lawyer for like women.

What's going on with China?

Yeah, good question.

Yeah.

What do you think?

I don't know.

But

these kind of like these little dead spots.

You know what I've been thinking?

We'll be able to edit it out.

I mean, I don't want to rely on editing.

Yeah.

But we've got to figure out a way.

You got a stack of cards.

You got a stack of cards sitting there, and everything you say off the card, don't read any of these.

But anything you say off the card is like whoever you're talking to.

Yeah.

They're like...

That's a good question.

Which one?

Condoms.

Do you like them or do you love them?

No, that's a dumb joke question.

I don't know.

Were you buggered by the Tories at primary school?

No, don't read these questions.

I'm a journalist.

People are going to figure out who we had on based on.

Princess Diana on the show.

Yeah.

How about Princess Guyana?

And she's like, she's like, where are the bananas?

Where is Guyana?

Where are the coconuts and the bananas?

Is it in South America

or Africa?

Does anyone have a coconut bra I could borrow?

Yeah.

It's me, Princess Guyana.

Guyana.

Yeah.

Does anyone have a bongo and perhaps some coconut bra I could put on?

And it's a man wearing a

baloo from the jungle book.

It's balou.

princess guyana wait here's my question about china nick yeah

what's the like are they fucking over there yeah of course they seem very busy and obviously they have a lot of people but like they fucked too much they had to make a they had to make laws saying you're you've you've fucked too much you've made too many chinese people to get pussy like what what's

what do you mean how do you go get like a out to market is it do they have arranged marriages or no you go to the wet market and get wet You get wet.

Yeah, you get some bat soup.

Yeah.

You take a bitch out for a little bat soup.

Yeah, you smoke some PCP and you hit the fucking shopper's food window.

Do they have do they

have controlled substances there?

I don't know.

Apparently, the way they drink, my friend lived there, the way they drink is like they just sit at a table until everyone's blackout.

That's how that's just a bar.

You're just describing a bar.

I guess so.

Remember that guy Pingju?

Pongju?

The fat Chinese guy?

that.

Yeah.

Tornado guy?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He ruled.

Yeah.

Why'd they why'd they stop why di they stop him from doing his thing?

I'm sure he fucking like d gave a thumbs up to an American flag and they put him in prison or something.

He's with the w he's a with the Uyghurs?

Uh I don't know if he's with the Uyghurs.

What's going on with the Uyghurs?

Do you know?

Is it still just a funny word they say?

I heard what's going on, but I don't want to say that.

We got the internet.

We got to cut the interviews parts where it's just you saying words that you think are funny and like snickering.

Like, we can't do any more of that with guests.

Yeah.

You know, it's got to be.

You have to be serious.

You do have to be serious.

You can have fun, but we do have to be serious.

Yes.

You can't have fucking,

you know,

who's a guest?

Who do you want on the show?

Dream interview.

I'll get it.

We'll make it happen.

Or

I'll hire somebody that can hire somebody that can make it happen.

Rihanna.

Yeah.

Rihanna.

You want Rihanna.

Yeah.

And then you can't sit here with Rihanna and be like, why is there an H in your name?

What is H doing?

I think that's a pretty good question.

Is it Rihanna?

Like the way Hank Hill would say it?

That's good.

You don't think she'd like that?

And then you do that coffee maker laugh.

You sound like a dying fucking Kurig.

No.

You're like, fuck, I hope this thing's under warranty.

You don't think that'd be a good question for Rihanna, though?

It would be pretty good.

No, no questions like that.

Why the H?

You gotta, you gotta.

I've always wondered that.

This is what I mean.

We need to hire somebody that can ask you real questions

and not just H and giggling.

It can't be

an unanswerable question.

Because the question can't be a setup for you to make.

It can't be a joke.

For you to then say,

how could she possibly answer that question?

What is the H in there for?

It's her name.

You know what I mean?

Well, maybe it stands for something like

hoe.

No,

no,

I'm not bringing Rihanna on the show for you to call her a whore.

I'm not gonna do that.

You're not doing that, but she's written in her songs she talks about

that.

That could be an interview question.

In your songs, you talk, okay.

And you're already starting to do it because I know where you're gonna go.

You're gonna say, What is a rude boy?

No, you're gonna

say,

In your song,

you have a lyric that says, Come on, rude boy, boy.

Can you get it up?

Come on, rude boy, boy.

Are you big enough?

And

how big is enough?

Yeah.

Well, it's a huge jump from like basic functioning penis to your dick has to be huge.

Yeah.

Because that's where the inquiry starts.

Can you get it up?

Can you get it up?

You can.

Sure.

Is your dick huge?

Well, hold on now.

Hold on.

Exactly.

There's space in between.

It's always bothered me when I've heard that song.

Can you get it up?

Of course.

Yeah.

Are you big enough?

What is enough?

To have sex.

To have sex.

Technically, guys with micro-penises could have sex.

No, there was some reality show that I saw one time about guys with micro-penis.

What did they say?

And there was one guy, dude.

It was like one of the saddest things I've ever seen.

I don't even know why he let them film this.

Like, who's agreeing to go on that show?

But this guy is married.

He's got a wife.

And he's like, and I just hope we can finally have sex.

Because I guess they never fucked.

Because, yeah, sometimes your dick can be so small and you can be so fat that they have something and they it's so rude of them to even pretend this is a disease but they call it hidden penis syndrome

which

like

at least give it a Greek name you know what I mean you can't call it hidden

hidden penis syndrome

but just name it after that guy's last name yeah no it just looks like fucking Jefferson syndrome yeah no it should just it looks like somebody dropped a marble on over-proofed pizza dough It's just a fucking, like, a belly button.

He's got like another.

It's just like an indie button.

Hello?

Anybody home?

It's like down the hole.

You know, yeah.

Wow.

So it's like in his body.

It's just in his body somewhere.

And then it just peeks out maybe with a little motor.

Yeah, it's like a little

groundhog.

Yeah.

Wow.

It's Puxatani Phil.

Yeah, it tells you how much more spring we're going to have.

It comes out and just bites.

And then it just takes a little nibble.

You've seen that video, right?

It's very cute.

Puxatani Phil biting the mayor's ear.

No.

The mayor of

Puxatani PA.

Yeah,

he's got the groundhog to his ear, and he's listening to it.

And this fucking thing, it's like it lives in a cage

and it doesn't know it has a job.

And it's a

name as a prisoner.

It's a slave.

It's just this big rat that fucking wants to go eat cheese in a hole.

And they fucking, they're just holding it like a big catered sandwich to the mayor's ear.

How does the thing know if it sees its shadow?

Yeah, something like that.

And it just, the mayor's listening to it, and it just bites him, like, it gets him.

And it's like, it gets it, it gets him for a second, and it pulls it away, but you can see that the fucking this little guy.

And then they just pull it away and put it back.

But what were we talking about?

Oh, yeah, the hidden penis syndrome.

Yeah.

And so, yeah, this guy has to go get

surgery.

Do you remember one time we were laughing?

I forgot where we were, but

like that micropenis is a medical designation.

So like like literally you have to go to

like a doctor yeah yeah yeah

a doctor tells you that you have a small

yeah it's very funny like going into an office yeah has his degree behind him and he's like sir you have a small

I went to I went to eight years of college just plastic guts on the table yeah yeah this is fucking the yeah diagram of the heart inside of the man's stomach yeah yeah anyway so this guy has a hidden penis injury and he goes in for surgery.

And he's like, yeah, so they're going to

expose my penis.

They're going to cut away all the fat around my penis to bring my penis out so I can

put it in my wife.

And

you know what?

Where are the balls?

What?

Where are the balls?

They're in there somewhere.

They're in the hole.

They're kind of doing their own thing.

The balls are

minding their own them,

yeah.

They're kind of, they're like,

the balls are like, they're off somewhere else.

Somebody comes by and they're like, where's the dick?

They're like, I don't know, no dick.

I don't know.

I've never, I don't know, no dick.

I don't know nobody.

And yes, and

yeah, what?

Oh, yeah.

So this guy goes into surgery.

Yeah.

And it just like fades to black and it comes out and they're like, well, his heart wasn't in good enough shape to do the surgery.

So they just wake him up and they tell you,

no chance, your dick's hidden from you.

Yes, of course.

Yeah, that's so sad.

And then a director somewhere was like, get this, dude.

Get this.

Get him crying.

And go to switch to camera B.

Yeah.

Let's get camera penis.

Let's get camera penis.

Let's do a split screen and we'll show his penis tucked away forever as this man cries on fucking

on TLC.

It's psychotic.

Oh, that's heartbreaking.

Yeah.

That is heartbreaking.

Yeah.

Oh, that poor guy.

Yeah.

But he still had a wife.

I know.

She was a

favorite.

That's my favorite thing I do now at this point because it's like,

I'll probably die alone, honestly.

I get worse and worse at, you know, at this point, I'm just, you know, I'm watching my friends disappear.

All your friends are dying.

But then I'll just project that onto like

just everything else.

Like being obsessed with that Yeti cooler subreddit.

I'm like, oh, these guys are fucking.

And then you read the post and it's like, me and my wife went camping this week.

And I'm like, yeah, he's not happy, dude.

He's fucking...

This guy's a freak.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

He's probably a really well-adjusted guy.

He's really into his water bottle.

Yeah, my cat's just throwing up on my pants.

I'm eating fucking just expired pretzels.

Fucking loser.

Yeah, right.

Laughing about it with my other friend who's,

you know in a similar yeah that guy has a wife that's true yeah

yeah yeah

and look at us we have this you're in a relationship you live with your girlfriend you guys you guys have a great time together you go out and do stuff all the time she likes activities uh

she wanted to go in the moon path she did that was funny that was that was funny that that dumb bitch tried to fucking tried to do some twee shit with i'm there we're all hanging out Tried to do France with the shit.

She's like, let's go.

Yeah, right, exactly.

And then what am I supposed to do?

There's like a mad.

You're just standing on the stream waiting for you guys.

Waiting for you guys to finish.

You know that I don't want to go.

Right.

Yeah.

I mean, you saved my ass, too.

Ooh, look at that.

The moon bounce.

The moon bounce.

Yeah, what if we go picked fucking blueberries afterwards, too?

Yeah, let's go to an apple or two.

Yeah.

And then I'll do, and then I'll do what?

I'll just hang out with the goats.

Yeah, yeah.

Just, yeah, you're at the petting zoo.

They're telling you you're scaring the children.

Today's episode of the Adam Freeland Show is also brought to you by Ridge Wallet.

Ridge Wallet.

Ridge Wallet.

I use it myself.

Look, now we're on camera.

I can show you.

You guys, here's Ridge Wallet.

Here's a little cross promo.

Best wallet I've ever had.

Adam's got the backpack somewhere in here.

We both do.

No, I didn't bring my backpack today.

The Ridge Wallet.

This thing's going to be.

So if you guys

are members of Patreon, of the Patreon, patreon.com/slash T-A-F-S,

you saw our tour documentary and you saw prominently featured, Nick and I both have the commuter backpack from Bridge.

It's fantastic, honestly.

The zipper is really cool.

Have you ever seen how it works?

No, it's like covered so that if it's raining,

your laptop won't get wet.

There's like a way, but it's not like a flap.

So it's waterproof.

But yeah, it's like this locking system that's like not like on your fly.

Well, I have to have that on my fly also because of my

water.

Because I pee all the time.

You pee.

Yeah.

And the pee comes out.

Yeah, yeah.

The dead stream is so strong.

Well, because of my hidden penis syndrome.

Hidden penis.

It's actually, it's pee from months ago that builds up in my crab.

They don't talk about how men with

HP

have incredibly powerful streams.

Yeah.

Yeah, I've got HP.

Yeah, I got HP.

Yeah, I did the 5K for HP last week.

I've been suffering from HP for my entire time.

How many of you just sign up for the New York Marathon?

And so you're out here running for raising money for HP.

What's that, Harry Potter?

And then the hidden penis.

HPS.

Yeah, my brother-in-law's got HPS.

Think of this cool item on Ridge, which is a key case.

So it's like you spend your whole life with these damn keys on rings, right?

They have this thing that's like they all fold into the case.

Yeah, that's pretty cool.

I remember the talking to them.

Yeah, yeah, I see the website.

Gesturing.

That seems like something Nick would get into.

Oh, they got watches now, also.

Let me see.

I'm looking at it.

Is it a simplified watch to simplify your life?

I don't know.

They look pretty nice.

And they got the air tag.

Air tag cash strap.

Oh, cool.

So you can put an air tag on the wallet pretty easily.

Wow,

they've really leveled up.

They've really stepped up their game, and we've been with them since the beginning when it was just

a wallet.

They got a pen now.

It started off as a GoFundMe or something, right?

Now they got commercials on taps, and they got commercials on the motherfucking station.

What the fuck is this?

The packable backpack?

Let me see.

I don't know.

I want that, dude.

I'm going to send back the one I have in the game.

Why?

Because they got

a lot of people.

They're always innovating.

They are really always innovating.

So whether it's wallets, backpacks, key cases, what else do they have?

Air tags.

They got knives.

Knives, watches.

They find a way to simplify all of your basic items that you carry with you every day.

You don't think twice about, but they find a way to make it more efficient.

And if there's anything Nick and I like, as you can tell, from spending a hundred and probably

something

a thousand dollars and counting, it is efficiency.

We live efficiency.

What?

Your hand shaking?

Yeah.

You have tremors?

Yeah.

I've been sleeping.

Why not?

Just stressed out.

Come on, bro.

Yeah.

You're going to have a nice weekend this weekend.

Yeah, hopefully.

This one seems fine, I think.

What's that?

This hand's fine.

Oh, your masturbating hand.

That's your gun.

I think so.

I don't know.

That's your left hand.

You don't need that.

Who gives a fuck about the left hand, bro?

It doesn't matter at all.

Guys,

they got all these fucking things they have phone cases the backpack is fucking fantastic i use it all the time i've brought it take it through uh airport security all the time

as a traveling man anyway these pens also look really nice too

Yes, they're good.

Anyways, go to ridgewall.com, use promo code COMETOWN or ComeTOWN20.

You want fucking, no drinking this weekend in San Francisco.

All right.

It's up to you.

It's going to ruin the show.

Come out, but keep in mind, I won't be drunk.

Where are you at?

Cobbs?

Cobbs, yeah.

Yeah.

It's a good club?

Yeah.

I can't, I can't.

I can't do it.

I got to stop.

Yeah.

But you're in the show.

You got to figure your shit out, dude.

I thought it would be fine.

It started off with like, oh, I have a glass of wine with dinner.

And then now it's just,

it's, I can't.

Now you want a beer.

Well, now I want, yeah, just beers everywhere.

Because now you're in, yeah.

Because you love beer.

Because, yeah.

You're a fucking beer head.

You're a beer head.

I don't know, I don't know.

Listen, on one level, the world sucks.

Who fucking cares?

On another level, you know what my fear was for like 10 years?

And you got to do what's right for you.

The time I spent sober, I was always like, Well, I could always start drinking again, you know, like shit sucks.

Well, your plan was to start at 30.

Yeah, it was like, well, if shit sucks, I can always start drinking again, but then I always had this fear that, like, that won't be the answer, you know what I mean?

I don't think that's answered.

And I did it, and it's not the answer.

I do not think that's the answer.

Yeah, it's not.

And then it's like, well, there's nothing else to do now.

I guess I gotta.

You know what?

Honestly, I.

I mean, I was with you last night.

You had two beers?

I had three, yeah.

Three beers.

Yeah.

I mean, like, that's not.

It's not.

I'm not going crazy.

You're not going crazy off of it, but it's not good for you because it doesn't make you feel good, especially the next day.

I need to feel bad.

Going to the gym.

I need a schedule.

I need to take care of myself.

And we need some because that's all you do.

We need camera ops and lights.

I've never regretted going.

Trips and camera offs.

Yes.

I've never regretted going to the gym.

Because you are.

To be honest with you, and I'll say this again about our buddy Nick.

You are taking on too much.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And you love it too.

It's fun, dude.

It's a lot of fun.

But then you get to the end of it and it's like,

you know, I mean.

I got boogers dude.

Just

wipe it.

But wipe it on your sleeve.

Come on, let's finish the episode.

Just wipe it on your sleeve.

You know you do this all the time.

You know you sneeze.

You know you're a sneezer.

Let's just get through this.

All right.

And we're back.

And we're back.

I like being honest, dude.

It's more fun.

I like being honest, too.

It's more fun to be honest.

What do they think we are?

I don't know.

Do they think we're some sort of like flim flam men?

What does that mean?

Like

cry?

I have no idea.

I don't know if you want to blow my nose, dude.

You just did on your sleeve.

I didn't blow it.

I wiped my nose, but now I have boogers still in my nose.

No, you're fine.

Stop, stop.

All right, fine.

Sorry.

We're going to do more sincere sobriety chat.

Yeah,

everybody's favorite thing.

I don't know.

Maybe this is a good example for kids, you know?

Yeah, for all the kids that listen to the show.

Yeah, they're mad kids listening to the show.

Yeah.

Like, kids in between, like.

I gotta stop this shit, too.

This shit, this is the fucking thing.

Yeah, it makes you annoying.

Just the fact that we're all just like pretending that this is better than cigarettes.

No, and also a cigarette is nice.

Oh, yeah, that's that's yeah, right.

Chinese perfume, that's probably better for your fucking body.

Yeah, yeah.

Inhaling

unknown chemicals

from the literal enemy.

The Chinese do this?

Yeah, of course.

I'm pretty sure.

I thought it was like a family of chill cowie kind of stones.

The Chinese make everything, dude.

Yeah, they do.

This one, like, is like a, like, Apple made it.

Like,

the metal case and stuff.

Yeah.

Also, it's just so wasteful.

You blast through this and you're just throwing in the trash.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

So, what else?

This is why we need, you know, those cue cards.

You c we can do, like, interview stuff.

No.

All right.

Um, anyways, so, yeah, we'll talk about the election.

Are you gonna vote for real today?

Um, yeah, I got a Pennsylvania fake ID so I could vote for for Fed you wop.

Oh, nice.

Yeah.

How's he doing?

I don't know.

He's probably gonna win, right?

Um

I think regular folks don't like Doctor Oz.

Like folks that would vote Republican.

Why?

'Cause he's a bitch, dude.

Yeah, he is.

Yeah.

He's not cool.

He's not.

Yeah.

He's just someone that has a TV career, but not because he's cool.

Right?

What do you think?

There's no reason to run out the clock on this.

We're at 54 minutes.

Guys, thanks for joining us.

You're done?

Yeah, whatever.

I mean, what, to just repeat things we said about Dr.

Oz for another five minutes for no reason?

When did we talk about Dr.

Oz?

A couple weeks ago.

We talked about the when Shane was here.

We talked about it.

We talked about Shane, yeah.

Shane said he was a bitch, too.

Guys, stay tuned.

We're going to get the producer.

We'll get another editor.

We'll figure this out.

I'll stop fucking with these lights.

I'll get sleep.

I'll put my room together.

You need to get sleeping.

With my guys.

And then, yes, the Adam Freeland show will happen.

We're good.

One way or another.

Guys, don't worry.

That's what we're saying.

Don't worry.

Hey, don't worry.

Don't worry.

We're going to worry for you, but you don't worry.

You don't.

We're incredibly worried.

Don't worry about a thing.

All right.

See you next week, guys.

It's time to head back to school and forward to your future with Carrington College.

For over 55 years, we've helped train the next generation of healthcare professionals.

Apply now to get hands-on training from teachers with real-world experience.

In as few as nine months, you could start making a difference in healthcare.

Classes start soon in Pleasant Hill, San Leandro, and San Jose.

Visit Carrington.edu to see what's next for you.

Visit carrington.edu/slash SCI for information on program outcomes.