Hour 1: Hawk's Lying Uncle

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Speaker 1 This is the Don Levatar Show with the Stoogats Podcast.

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Speaker 1 the bulls

Speaker 1 nah no i thought it was ray no ray was all my dogs in the house Right? He might have used Game Time. That was Baja Men.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was definitely the Baja Men. I mean,

Speaker 1 the Baja men are the exact opposite of all my dogs in the house. The Baja men were concerned about who let all the dogs out of their house.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Can I ask you something about houses really quick just because you mentioned it and I feel like we're not going to get back to it.

Speaker 1 You just said that like when you had a cat sitter at your house and your cat would scurry about and go sneak the food that the cat sitter thought, oh, that's just one of those house noises.

Speaker 1 And we all just kind of like moved on.

Speaker 1 That's like one of the weirdest things we do as like a society right is like we just like there's noises in your house you're like that's just a house noise and it's really just because like I don't want to deal with whatever that noise is So as long as I don't know what it is and it doesn't sound like it's too serious That's just a house noise.

Speaker 1 And we're not gonna address that. It's creaking like it's the it's the changing temperature like I think this explains it right.
It's like the change in temperature.

Speaker 1 It's wood and whatever expanding and contracting and so you just you want me to go find where it is contracted and heat up that portion of that house?

Speaker 1 No, I'm just saying like I feel like there's so much going on that there's this certain level of sound that you like just allow to occur. You're like, I don't really need to know.

Speaker 1 I was going to let you off the hook, Billy, but

Speaker 1 we need to know what your Uber rating is because you seem like you. He's grown up in nice houses.
He's grown up in such nice houses that they don't have creeks.

Speaker 1 Meanwhile, no, it's just there's always one temperature down here, so wood doesn't get colder or hotter. And everything's like concrete, too.

Speaker 1 As much as I love your value, the value you bring to the show with these interesting non-sequiturs, I imagine that this is not a bit. This is you all the time.

Speaker 1 And so when you're riding in Ubers, you probably annoy the hell out of your driver because you're like, hey. Well, okay.
I don't like the way you're setting this up at all.

Speaker 1 I was thinking today just walking in. What was his strategy today? Don't take it.
I was walking in today just thinking because I saw someone doing something.

Speaker 1 I'm like, that person's kind of weird, right? And then I thought, well, like, to that person, they're normal, right? And like, I'm weird. So, like, I'm positive.
No, it wasn't you. Are you sure?

Speaker 1 Look me in my eyes and promise me. No, it wasn't you.
No, no, it wasn't you. So it was someone that was like running down the street, like going for a jog, doing something.

Speaker 1 And I was like, that's kind of weird behavior that this person has. And I feel.
I wasn't talking was weird. No, no, no.

Speaker 1 It was a particular...

Speaker 1 We don't need to get bogged down by this.

Speaker 1 So. The point is, I saw and I was like, that person's weird.
But to that person, what they were doing is totally normal. And I feel like that's the case for everyone, right?

Speaker 1 Like, weird people don't know they're weird. They just think that to them, because of their circumstances, what they're doing is completely justifiable and not weird whatsoever.
It's possible.

Speaker 1 I feel like sometimes I know if I'm doing something weird and I know it's weird, but you haven't told us what they were doing. You said they were running down the street.
Like if they were.

Speaker 1 I don't want to say what it was because maybe the person works here.

Speaker 1 It was me, wasn't it? It wasn't you, though.

Speaker 1 Now you got to.

Speaker 1 Anyways,

Speaker 1 my rating is a 4.91. Woo! Yeah, I'm not proud of it.
That's good. It was a five for the longest time.
But here's the thing. I don't use Uber all that much.

Speaker 1 I only pretty much use it when I'm out of town. Like if I'm in town, I drive.
That's everywhere. That's a good thing, thing, though.
Because the more times you use it, the higher the number goes. No.

Speaker 1 Yes. The justification that it would be lower because you're basically exposed to more drivers who might understand what you do is weird versus what they think around you.
No, but can I tell you why?

Speaker 1 So a few means that, like, no, it means one bad score really throws it off. If I get a three, then it throws off my five average.
I was at a five forever.

Speaker 1 Then I looked at it and was like 4.8 something. I was like, what? What happened here? Nothing.
If you get a three,

Speaker 1 that five ride. Do you track it back to that one ride? I did.
You know what you did. No, I know what happened.
I didn't do anything, in my opinion. This is what happened.
I was in Washington, D.C.

Speaker 1 I was going around. We were checking out the monuments, whatever, right? Because of where we were,

Speaker 1 we got an Uber, and then the person couldn't find where we were. I guess there was like closures or whatever.
So the person had to do like multiple loops around.

Speaker 1 Then it was raining, so we were standing behind this column. Then they couldn't find us, and it became this whole thing.

Speaker 1 And I was like, I'm sorry that I'm in an inconvenient spot like but I'm a tourist I don't know where I'm supposed to be so then I went back and I found that I got like a three on that ride and I was very upset because I gave the person a five even though they kept us waiting in the rain for a very long time now I have a strategy on uber because I know that I can be weird as you have described me.

Speaker 1 You said I'm weird.

Speaker 1 You have weird non-sequiturs, which I appreciate. Well, this is what I'll do.
I'll never hit the option to not talk to me.

Speaker 1 Right? But what I do is I play the game, and it's weird in the sense that, like, so I'm the one that's being driven around, but I am catering to the driver the majority of the time.

Speaker 1 Like, I try to get the vibe of the driver based on the music that they're playing, based on if they're starting a conversation with me, based on if they're talking on the phone.

Speaker 1 Like, I try to see what kind of experience the driver wants to have, and then I try to provide that experience for the driver just for this rating that doesn't matter.

Speaker 1 Because, again, I pretty much only use it like when I'm on vacation.

Speaker 1 So, if it's been a quiet ride because we haven't spoken much, right? What I'll do is I always end on a positive note. So when I know we're like three or four blocks away.
He's like, thank you.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, no, no. When I know we're like three or four blocks away, the information that I have taken in while I've been in the seat, I figure out what is like the simplest like softball,

Speaker 1 small talk conversation that I can start with this person that I know will go favorable for them. And I show interest in what I've experienced them doing.

Speaker 1 So like one time when we were I don't know we were like in Chicago or whatever right we're driving around it's pretty quiet most of the time and it was a Tesla that I got picked up in right and I have not been in a Tesla before especially not an Uber right so then I start talking like oh you know you like this Tesla cuz I know Tesla drivers love talking about Teslas right so like I waited a little bit I'm like oh like how do you how do you like this Tesla

Speaker 1 I've never been like oh I love it I'm like yeah it's kind of cool in here he's like it's like how do you how do you charge you have a charger at home you go no I go here I do this I'm like how long does it take so I just start talking to him about his tesla because i know that's what the tesla driver really wants to talk about gave you a one star for that no way the guy loved it how do i charge it

Speaker 1 no i chargers

Speaker 1 guys no some people have home chargers some people have to go to charging stations and when you go to the charging station you have to wait an extended amount of time this guy in case you were wondering which you're not this guy didn't have a home charger because he lived in an apartment so he'd have to go somewhere and i was like well how many miles do you get when you charge it how often do you charge it i just get into what i think they want to talk about.

Speaker 1 I start observing them and then I ask them questions on the way out. One time when we were in Austin.
You're a dot non-boy. That's good enough.

Speaker 1 You're in the dot nine boy crew, which is good. You don't want to be a bad boy.
I want to get it up, though. No, I got a fiver.
Here's the thing: once you're not a fiver, you can never be a fiver.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Do we have the list before? Because I want to know where he places.
And did we get one from Amin and anybody else? I do. I have them.
I have Dom.

Speaker 1 You were the only two I'm unsure of you two. You were 4.9, Dom.
And you were. 478.
478.

Speaker 1 I was a 492.

Speaker 1 Mike, 475. Let's go.
Jess, 5.0. Yeah.
Roy, 497. There we go.
Charlie, 487.

Speaker 1 All right, so now I have two updates for us. Okay.
Tony's a 4.9 flat, which is a little surprising. That is,

Speaker 1 I'm embarrassed. Yeah.
For the 4.9 club. And then Amine.

Speaker 1 I texted Amine as I scroll through my text now. This is

Speaker 1 not great on air. So let me ask you something.

Speaker 1 The lower numbers, I'm assuming it's always someone else's fault, right?

Speaker 1 No one's took responsibility. Everyone's always like, ah, my friends.
We found out yesterday that Lucy had a dot. What did Lucy have?

Speaker 1 She had a really good one, but she had 496. She had two charges of $250 for throwing up in the Uber that.
She's thrown up into the city. That she remembered.

Speaker 1 They couldn't have been on her account. There's no chance.

Speaker 1 That has to have been like a group of friends that someone else got. There's no way that you've thrown up in a car and you have it that high twice.
That's crazy.

Speaker 1 So Amin, he taught it to me. I said, what's your Uber rating? He said, 4.86, but that's with the black tax.
So I am probably a 491, all else being. That's valid.

Speaker 1 I'll take it. I didn't want to go into that, but I can tell when I get into Uber if this guy likes black people or not.

Speaker 1 Almost immediately. I can too sometimes, and I'm not even black.
You're not even.

Speaker 1 And then how do you start that conversation?

Speaker 1 Now that we're here, finally. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's the first thing I thought of when you said, I try to end it favorably for them. I'm like, you slot a little racism racism in the way out, don't you?

Speaker 1 A little bit. You just open the windows.
To get that Umber ready. You crack the door.
It's one of my icebergs, Obama, huh?

Speaker 1 And then I see which way they go, and then I know which way to finish with it. I appreciate you speaking English.

Speaker 1 So someone who is not getting a good rating, at least not from John Morant, is Taylor Jenkins. I want to get into this conversation.

Speaker 1 He got fired from the Grizzly, who were in third place and had a really good record. They're considered a Western conference contender.

Speaker 1 It was kind of a shocking, probably would have been the most shocking thing.

Speaker 1 The vote on the tush push has been tabled. Ah,

Speaker 1 boo.

Speaker 1 Back to you. So, this probably would have been the most shocking thing in the NBA season if it wasn't for the fact that Luca got traded.

Speaker 1 But, like, having Taylor Jenkins, a winning coach on a team that seems to be heading in the right direction, and a respected X and O's coach be fired by his team just before the playoffs, I think, 15 games out of the playoffs while they're playing well in third place blew my mind.

Speaker 1 I think some reporting has come out since.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so the background on this is

Speaker 3 they cleared half of their assistant coaches this offseason and the new offense ran fewer ball screens.

Speaker 3 And John Morant in this system was not happy with his fewest touches, fewest points, fewer shot attempts per game in several years.

Speaker 3 He's also a considerably worse player than he was three years ago, shooting the ball significantly worse. And it creates a really interesting situation.
You have a good coach.

Speaker 3 You have John Morant, who, regardless of how absurd the NBA suspension and over the top was for his

Speaker 3 off-the-court stuff a couple years ago, he is still an unstable superstar because he doesn't play and he's not a consistent scorer because he can't shoot the basketball.

Speaker 3 He hasn't been consistent in the postseason.

Speaker 1 You guys, is it right in the NBA superstar culture to let that guy in that city change that coach?

Speaker 1 Yeah, the reporting is that he's out because Jai didn't like the changes to the

Speaker 3 not explicitly said, but the implication is that he wasn't happy with his role in the new offense.

Speaker 1 They're trying to figure out the reasons why. That's not the reason why Ja's not Ja, man.
You got to let that bird free, man.

Speaker 1 You got to let him.

Speaker 1 You got to give him a weekend. That's Dennis Rod.
You got to give him a weekend in South Beach, man.

Speaker 1 I wanted to ask Steve Williams that about Tiger. Like, you got to let them do what they do, man.

Speaker 1 Steve Williams looked us straight in the eye and said, Tiger had no off-field distractions. That's great.
I didn't want to say it.

Speaker 1 That's why I wanted to give grace to Neek, man, because

Speaker 1 if we're going to take accountability, which Steve went on record, he is not for. He is not for workplace accountability.
I'm like, okay, we're just breezing over everything at this point.

Speaker 1 The idea of the superstar in the NBA having enough power to fire a coach is not new.

Speaker 1 It doesn't bother me that Taylor Jenkins got run because the superstar wanted him out.

Speaker 1 I don't know that banking on that superstar and I think this is what you're alluding to Charlie is that John Morant is not a reliable superstar and he's not the level of superstar that you want to give this power to but he's the guy in that city and it just speaks to me about being a head coach in basketball or being anyone in the basketball organization.

Speaker 1 I ran into this argument oftentimes when people want to be critical of teams that were constructed around LeBron and say, well, don't blame the GM because LeBron's actually the GM.

Speaker 1 Maybe he is, but your job as the GM is to convince LeBron.

Speaker 1 You know, like you would have thought that at one point your job is to build a roster, but now your job has gotten a little harder when there's someone in your organization who has as much power and influence as a superstar player.

Speaker 1 Your job now becomes to sell LeBron, convince LeBron it was his idea, or figure out a way. And I feel the same way about this offense with Taylor Jenkins.

Speaker 1 And so, like, if Taylor gets fired because Jai's not happy, maybe you wish Jai would have handled this differently. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But ultimately, as a head coach, when they're your head coach of an NBA team and you guys have a superstar, I'm not saying you have to kowtow to the superstar, but you have to take into account that whatever you're doing, the first person and maybe the only person whose buy-in you have to get off the top is the superstar.

Speaker 1 And it doesn't matter how good your idea is. Like, I don't give a shit how innovative your offense is.
If you ain't convinced him that it's innovative and it's going to help you out, then you lost.

Speaker 1 It's this, it's age-old problem in sports where you think the title puts you in charge or you think the talent sometimes puts you in charge.

Speaker 1 When I was playing receiver in the league and I had other receivers and they were like, man, you're so happy being the fourth. I'm like, I'm not happy being the fourth receiver, bro.

Speaker 1 I know what I make.

Speaker 1 Like, this is the most I can be looking at the contracts. And you arguing

Speaker 1 for touches as an undrafted free agent on special teams, that ain't how this works, my boy. You got to follow the money trail.

Speaker 1 So even looking at Coach Jenkins and what you make a year versus what Job makes a year, it is not more important for what your strategy is.

Speaker 1 It only fits in that way of how it pertains to the main investment, which is Job Morant. And also, you might not have even done anything from your perspective, the warrant being fired or whatever.

Speaker 1 But from an organizational standpoint, we've invested this into Job Morant.

Speaker 1 Even if it is like, hey, maybe this doesn't work out. Maybe he'll never be the same player.
We got to remove some of the factors to see if that's the case.

Speaker 1 And I'm okay with moving away $3 to $5 million a year to save the $50 million a year that I'm giving this player. And

Speaker 1 the NBA superstar is the NFL quarterback. And that

Speaker 1 you can't win without one. And even if Ja is not the perfect one, he's the closest thing you got to it.
And there are lots of teams that are looking for somebody like that.

Speaker 1 So you thinking that you can, and I'm not suggesting that Taylor Jenkins is like, man, I don't need to convince Ja. I'll figure this out.

Speaker 1 But ultimately, whether he's doing that consciously or not, not having him believe in his plan is essentially doing that.

Speaker 1 And the point that you made about being the number four receiver, and they say you show up to practice happy, even though you're not getting no balls, I can't afford not to be.

Speaker 1 I cannot. Yeah, I'm in no position to come in here and try to wave it around and tell people what I am and am not going to do.
Although I'm not returning no punts. I don't care what you say.

Speaker 1 Me neither.

Speaker 1 I'm on record saying I'm not returning. I've told head coaches, hey, no, you go back there, return it.
Yeah, I don't know

Speaker 1 what happens with the Grizzlies going forward. I don't think that they were like a real, like legitimate title contender, top of the league, even though they were third place.

Speaker 1 No one was really considering what Ja and that team was going to do relative to the real top dogs, I think, in the West.

Speaker 1 But the future of that organization, I think, is still dependent on Ja Morant, no matter what, and finding some sort of way to build something, to hire someone and build something that he believes in and he's going to buy into is their only way of going forward, even if Taylor Jenkins is the smartest new coach on the scene.

Speaker 3 Isn't that the toughest spot for an NBA team to be in, though?

Speaker 3 Where you don't want to trade someone that talented because if you trade him somewhere, it's like he could be a 38-5 guy on a random team.

Speaker 3 But if you keep him and he's entitled to thinking he's in charge of the organization, you might just be a first-round buy every single year for a higher seed.

Speaker 1 It's tough.

Speaker 1 That's like having a quarterback who's like the 13th best quarterback. You're like, ah, he's good enough to start, but am I going to win anything? Tua? Tua? Yes, actually.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the alternatives at that position are tough, and it's impossible to find the perfect quarterback for your situation, but you wouldn't move on from Tua.

Speaker 1 And I think Jai is probably a higher version than Tua, but that's not the perfect.

Speaker 3 Do you think he has a better arm than him?

Speaker 1 Ja Moran? Yeah.

Speaker 3 Straight up, if they started at the goal line.

Speaker 1 That's so disrespectful.

Speaker 3 Do you think he could throw a football further?

Speaker 1 Absolutely not. I do.
There's no way. How tall is Jai, 6'3? Yeah.

Speaker 1 He's bendy. Bro, elastic arm.

Speaker 1 He can whip it.

Speaker 1 He doesn't look like one of those dudes who's just good at every sport. He is an incredible athlete, but there's no way he can throw it farther than Tua.
There's no way.

Speaker 1 I mean, I think farther, it's like we see the long ball drivers guys. Like, they're not better golfers than real golfers.
Bro, there's no way.

Speaker 1 We just got done talking about how you get disrespected every time someone even remotely insinuates

Speaker 1 that they could outdo you at something that you did speaking for money

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Speaker 1 Don Lebatard. Photography's not as hard as it's made out to be.
And now with computers, I mean, you can make anything look like anything, dude. It's almost cheating.
It's not fair.

Speaker 1 If you push a button and it takes a thousand pictures, you're going to find a good one in the bash. There were a lot of photographers there

Speaker 1 taking thousands of pictures. One got that photograph.

Speaker 1 Okay, good rhetoric. Stugats.
Haven't you ever passed by photographers?

Speaker 1 I guarantee you, when that shot was taken, we didn't just hear.

Speaker 1 That's not what you heard. If you were by that camera,

Speaker 1 in my ear with that.

Speaker 1 He does a good camera.

Speaker 1 This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats.

Speaker 1 Speaking of which, Taylor out there talking crazy. He was talking nuts.
Get the goofy goofy ass out of here, Taylor. Oh, you ain't faster than nothing now, me, or Hawking this thing.

Speaker 1 I have an update from ChatGPT. And now, Hawk, I know this is a sordid history between you and Chat GPT.

Speaker 1 Come on. But John Morant, according to ChatGPT, can reportedly throw a football about 70 yards.
What? Wow.

Speaker 1 There have been clips of him launching deep passes during warm-ups and off-season workouts, showing off his impressive arm strength. Wow.
Do they have him mixed up with Ant Edwards? Did Chat GPT?

Speaker 1 It definitely knows that John Morant is a basketball player.

Speaker 1 All right. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think that plays right into what I was saying. It's like, I would not say that John Morant is a better quarterback.
Like, obviously, these long ball driver guys are not better golfers.

Speaker 1 But if you ask him to do this very simple thing,

Speaker 1 he's a taller guy.

Speaker 1 whippy athleticism, big hands. Like, yeah, I feel like Jock will launch that thing.
Now, is he going to be more accurate? Is he going to be a better decision maker? Of course not.

Speaker 1 Well, definitely not a better decision maker.

Speaker 1 He's not not quite known for that. But I also don't think he can throw it further.
I asked ChatGPT for proof,

Speaker 1 and it was prepared for that question. Wow.
While specific measurements of John Morant's football throwing distance aren't publicly documented,

Speaker 1 his athletic prowess suggests he possesses significant arm strength.

Speaker 1 For instance, during a game against the Knicks on February 28th, Morant attempted a full court shot, throwing the basketball approximately 94 feet. This action resulted in a technical foul.

Speaker 1 What are we doing, GPT? It's 31 yards.

Speaker 1 What the hell are we doing? And now you're spreading this folklore. Yeah, I'm sorry.
That people are taking it. It's harder to throw a basketball.
Yeah, it is hard to throw a basketball.

Speaker 1 Are we kidding right now? You think he's the first athlete 6-3? No. That doesn't mean you can throw a football 70 yards.
I think he can do crazy windmills.

Speaker 1 I appreciate the chat DPT support, but I'm not sure that I really

Speaker 1 documented he could throw a football far. Show it to me.

Speaker 1 Well, we don't really have that video per se. But remember that game against the Knicks? Shut up, chat GPT.
You sound like my Uncle Rick.

Speaker 1 Oh, you got an uncle named on something. He just makes stuff up, man.
Like, he literally just, yeah, he could do this back in my day. Like, Rick, you're lying, bro.

Speaker 1 Uncle Rick probably hates the internet. Rick was getting them lies off.
Forever. Uncle Rick has been getting them lies off

Speaker 1 until the early 2000s when people have phones with the internet. Apparently, the archives I've had to go into to prove Uncle Rick wrong because he thinks I don't have access to newspapers

Speaker 1 that still doesn't stop Uncle Rick though

Speaker 1 apparently we have a photo of the guy that says he could beat you guys in a race if you guys want to throw up that photo of Taylor. He ran track

Speaker 1 Why are you laughing man?

Speaker 1 What he's he's running for North Carolina That doesn't mean anything to you as a Maryland turp, but me who grew up wanting to play for North Carolina, he has a baton, so so he's on some team of sort.

Speaker 1 Yeah. On some relay.
That, that's a, I mean, that's probably, that's a 400 guy. That's an 800 guy.
You might beat me in a 400 or 800 riding on Taylor in the one. You think you can ride him in the one?

Speaker 1 Headband's wild, yeah. Yeah, the headband is crazy.
Sir, especially because he has like a buzz cut. Yeah, yeah.
Let's be serious about this guy. Let's break this down.

Speaker 1 Especially since he wasn't in like the headband era. Like, how old is Taylor?

Speaker 1 That's a wild look. Yeah.
Like, the headband era was like 2001. You know, there's no way that this was then.

Speaker 1 What you also know, and for the listening audience, Taylor has good arm definition, which like suggests that maybe he's a pretty good athlete. I respect that he's an above-average ad.

Speaker 1 So racially ambiguous. That can.

Speaker 1 So racially ambiguous.

Speaker 1 I'm even more confused now.

Speaker 1 I would also think Italian. Say

Speaker 1 that's like a Greek last name. This is like a Nike ad to sell the headbands.
Like, let's just put someone right dab in the middle. This is a Mike Torico situation.
I see some Mbappe.

Speaker 1 Lil Bops got some Bobs too.

Speaker 1 The top is baggy, man, which suggests to me that the equipment manager didn't respect him, which means he was a slow guy on the team.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry, Taylor. Like, I know when, as a rookie, as a third-round rookie, my jersey never looked worse.
I don't know what's happening right now. This is the lightest I've ever seen his complexion.

Speaker 1 And he's outside running the outdoor track. But it's also the blackest he's ever looked.
Yeah, it's. How in the world do you got an indoor season complexion on the outdoor season track?

Speaker 1 Fuentes is so pissed right now. Fuentes, why he pissed me? He doesn't like Wentz.
Well, he's not racially ambiguous.

Speaker 1 The guy in the green back there that he's beating very clearly tells me this was like a B team. Yeah, I don't even know what...

Speaker 1 That guy's just wearing a jersey that says Jason. Does it say Babson? Just say Wednesday.
UNC race Babson.

Speaker 1 Taylor, this is not helping you, man. I hope that they looked this up.
I hope you didn't look this up. Somebody go mouse blue.
He for sure sent this to them.

Speaker 1 I hope you didn't send this to them thinking that this was going to scare me. That George Mason?

Speaker 1 Or a guy named Mason. I don't think George Mason would be the George on top.
It would be. That's an astute observation.

Speaker 1 It looks like Mason.

Speaker 1 Maybe there's a G. Maybe there's a G on the far side that we can't see.
I've never been more confident in my life that I would ride on this kid. Yeah.
Get out of here. I don't know.

Speaker 1 You probably paid to run, too. Are you a scholarship athlete? Did they call you up? Did they send you a letter or you showed up and knocked on the door? I was like, hey, excuse me.

Speaker 1 I hate to discriminate against me. As a former walk-on, I don't want to discriminate against the walk-ons.
However, some of us do have talent. Right.
But, however, this does point to this.

Speaker 1 It is not Taylor so much. It is the guy beside him.

Speaker 1 Because in a 400, his legs shouldn't be back that far. That looks like a distance runner.
Yeah, that's right. That's a distance runner's demeanor

Speaker 1 and body style. Like that guy.
This feels like a 4x1 or like a 4x8. This might be a 4x8 eight

Speaker 1 this is slow this is a slow race my guy got them glasses on that guy the glasses is the thing and those are expecs for sure how bad your vision gotta be that you can't stay between the lines like we not asking you to catch nothing bro how bad your vision gotta be that you that you gotta wear glasses to run straight

Speaker 1 Goodness, Taylor. Yeah.
Who are you running against?

Speaker 1 I like my chances against Taylor in the 100. I I did run a 100 last year.
Nice. This is a look-it-me-louie situation because it was the same thing.
I'm like, I want to see what this is about.

Speaker 1 I did tweak my hamstring.

Speaker 1 I absolutely did. It put me out.
I have not run since. It was in July.
Good for you. But I did run an 11-6.
Damn. That's solid at 39 years old.
That's more than solid. Thank you.

Speaker 1 That is very impressive at 39 years old. Taylor, you don't stand a chizz.

Speaker 1 While we're catching up on the athletic ability of people around here, we have video also of Tony playing some league basketball.

Speaker 1 This is Tony shooting a three, bang, making a three. Apparently, this is a highlight reel, so it's all going to be good plays.
There's some in the corner.

Speaker 1 Why are we showing this on a day he's not in here? We're just

Speaker 1 like to see. I want to see what's going on.
Hold on, hold on, hold on. Little additional.
Little give a go. Hold on.
Again, Tony, whatever. Look at the people he's playing against.

Speaker 1 There's a dude on a court with a pink satin do-rag. It's a single track with a satin do-rag on.

Speaker 1 Get out of here. He got a stroke, though.
He does. That also looks like a very much younger Tony.

Speaker 1 I mean, he's a catch-and-shoot player. That's fine.
That's the same point in a one-on-one situation.

Speaker 1 Can you create? He's tall. Can you create? Can you stop me from getting to the cup? If you ain't 7'6, like, he got to be like...
He was the tallest player on that court.

Speaker 1 And you know where he was at? Corner. They relegated the biggest player to the...

Speaker 1 They saw him play. It was like, hey, you know what? Stand over there.
Me and Satan do rag going to run a two-man game. And if they help off of it, then you got to open shot.
Stand over there.

Speaker 3 So, you guys, Hawk and Fox, ran the exact same 40 time at the combine.

Speaker 1 Wow. How about that?

Speaker 3 4.34, guys.

Speaker 1 That's crazy.

Speaker 3 Who's winning a race right now?

Speaker 1 That's real speed. Oh, Hawk is running a race.
Not today. You know, I mean, my back situation,

Speaker 1 I have not run since July. I can't tell you who's going to win.
I'll tell you who will lose, and his name is Taylor.

Speaker 1 If we were to run a race,

Speaker 1 that manila folder. I like Taylor, bro.
Taylor's been athlete. I like him.
Let's throw up that photo again because. All right.

Speaker 1 I mean, we could deduce. Is that guy in first place? Is that guy in first place? He's cut.

Speaker 1 Or is that an official at the very battle? Hold on. I can guarantee you that Jason is not in second place.
So if you're telling me that Taylor's in first place, that means Jason is in second place.

Speaker 1 He's all the way on the most inner lane, right? Taylor's on the most inside lane. Uh-huh.
And Jason, so this is, this is 7-8 territory. We're looking at Taylor got seven place.

Speaker 1 Unless he's being lapped.

Speaker 1 I'm telling you, he'll be getting like second place in like Heat 3. And that's fine.
Yeah. But he was also on the football team.
So he's a two-sport athlete

Speaker 1 at North Carolina.

Speaker 1 And he was... Yes, which is factual.
It's factual. That's factual.
So it's not like he was putting everything into track. The tough thing is, you said he's a two-sports.
Sport athlete at Carolina.

Speaker 1 Three days after I ran into Julius Peppers in Colorado. You want to talk about a two-sport athlete?

Speaker 1 How dare you put Taylor in the same conversation

Speaker 1 as

Speaker 1 Ronald Curry?

Speaker 1 Three. Julius Pepper's bad.

Speaker 1 I feel like Julius Peppers and like Miles Garrett, like guys like that, it's a different category of human. Yeah.
Like you were talking about phylums earlier?

Speaker 1 That's a phylum that Taylor don't need to get nowhere near. Are we counting Michael Jordan as a Tarheel two-sport athlete? What other sport did he play? Baseball, but not for the school.

Speaker 1 No, that doesn't. No.

Speaker 1 He didn't play for their baseball team, right? I don't think so. Maybe he did.
No, we're not giving him the two-sport.

Speaker 1 He has everything.

Speaker 1 So Taylor's a better two-sport athlete than Michael Jordan. In North Carolina history, for sure.
He's not. He is not.
The ceiling is the roof. He's certainly more accomplished.

Speaker 3 Maybe Marion Jones. Didn't she do track and basketball at UNC?

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's a good one. And off the metal sandout.
Taylor. Incredible athlete.
But you're still on the Mount Rushmore. Yeah.
You know what Taylor does around here, one of his most important jobs?

Speaker 1 Boldest take. I was just thinking about the boldest take.
Can we get it? I've heard Dan give the listeners a lot of hell about how bad this stuff is. I actually really like it.

Speaker 1 I think the last few weeks they brought it strong. The Boost Mobile Boldest Take from the weekend is presented by Boost Mobile, the newest 5G network in the country.

Speaker 1 So let's see what they got this week.

Speaker 5 We should not be making not dishwasher safe products anymore. I'll hang up and listen.

Speaker 6 Hey, this is Richard. I just got out of a lunch with my sister-in-law.
bold take you get one basic modification to your meal after that you're an

Speaker 6 you say hey no pickle or no onion add tomato whatever the heck you get one anything after one you're a piece

Speaker 5 my boldest take from the weekend is that the tootsie roll song is way more popular than the tootsie roll candy Pro bolone cheese is the superior all-purpose sandwich cheese.

Speaker 5 Put it on a cheeseburger, cold turkey sandwich. It goes with any kind of sandwich.
Hey, this is Jeremy from Auburn. I'm just going to do Bobby from King of the Hill Limited Fake.

Speaker 1 Dan!

Speaker 5 Yeah, this is Jahan from Oklahoma, and I'm just going to say, quit calling it a luncheon. It's just a lunch.
Get over yourself. Deep dish pizza is closer to lasagna than it is to real pizza.

Speaker 5 To William from Winter Park, and this is my limited fake Mickey Mouse.

Speaker 1 Oh, boy.

Speaker 1 Hey there, it's Bobby from Arizona.

Speaker 7 I was looking at some very early pre-draft rankings of players, and I was wondering how in the hell Rutgers had two players that are expected to be picked in the top five in the NBA draft, yet somehow they managed to have a 15-17 record this year in the Big Ten.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's not the only one asking that question. It's a damn good question.
I am done with lunching. Like, why do we call it a a luncheon? Yeah, I don't know.
It's just lunch.

Speaker 1 I mean, there has to be some reason.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It has to be some reason why it is.
It's going to be lunch in. Like dying in.
It's a French word or something. Is that what it is? L'Arenchon.
L'Arenchon. L'Arenchéon.

Speaker 1 That is one of the easiest ways to get a laugh in the history of the world. His daughter French accent.
Oh, it's great.

Speaker 1 I don't mean it as a judgment. It's perfect.
I've never not laughed when someone honed on the end of the phrase. Well, I mean, Keenan Thompson literally made a career out of it, you know, as Pierre S.

Speaker 1 Cargo. We don't speak of that.
We don't speak that name. Sorry.

Speaker 1 I'm bringing up game one shit. My bad.

Speaker 1 We can't learn from it. Didn't you turn on Keenan because of yesterday? No, I love Keenan.
I'm just joking. We never talked about it.
Keenan and Cal, such a good show.

Speaker 1 I didn't even get into that. I was like letting him push where he wanted to go.
I wanted to list my favorite Keenan sketches. I wanted to do impersonations,

Speaker 1 but I didn't want to disrespect him. Call him up.
Get him back on.

Speaker 1 Get him back on.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think he seemed like the. No, he's not coming on.
He's like that standard there. After Mike

Speaker 1 disrespected Gerd, the way that he did to end the interview. In the interview, you said something negative about Gerd.
No, I was like, you know, just, I wanted to say Gerd. It was funny.

Speaker 1 And I thought, let me try to make it lighter. I'm like, did you ever think you'd go from, you know, being a teenager on all that to doing media hits about GERD?

Speaker 1 That also implies that you failed at life, too. No, I want to.

Speaker 1 No, I mentioned it like as, like, wow, you've been in entertainment for so long. Like, that, that'll tell you, like, you're hitting 40, right?

Speaker 1 I will not stand for the Mike disrespect because,

Speaker 1 I mean, not disrespect. I was standing for my disrespect.

Speaker 1 I will not sit for the Mike criticism because, as we established, I couldn't get the ball up to court. And Mike was not expecting to have to get the ball.
He was trying. So that's all me.

Speaker 1 We've accepted accountability for that a number of times.

Speaker 1 But lasagna, deep disc pizza, accurate take, right? Like lasagna, deep disc pizza is delicious, but it's weird calling it pizza because it is much closer to lasagna than it is.

Speaker 1 But it has all the fixings. Yes, agreed.

Speaker 1 Yeah, still, I mean, that's like lots of different foods have the same components, but it doesn't, if you put them together differently, they become a different.

Speaker 1 You're talking about like a wrap and salad? Yeah. Like, you don't call a salad wrap a salad wrap, you call it a wrap.

Speaker 1 Salad sandwich.

Speaker 1 They do call them caesar wrap so

Speaker 1 yeah

Speaker 1 caesar is a caesar wrap a salad

Speaker 1 no makes you think no caesar wraps a caesar wrap

Speaker 1 uh what is caesar's connection to that salad have we has anybody figured that out i assume it's the like the dressing they probably invented or originated the dressing also like how did caesar get the haircut

Speaker 1 get a fresh caesar yeah there's a lot of salad going on those are the biggest influences in the history of the Empire. Feel like dressing in here.
I feel like we had a nice lead in this third quarter.

Speaker 1 We're still up. No.
We're still up.

Speaker 1 No, we're cutting down to single digits. We're moving the ball around.
We're killing the clock.

Speaker 1 We took a little last shot. Wait till y'all see this fourth quarter.
No.

Speaker 1 The Caesar salad, a beloved dish, originated in Tijuana, Mexico at Caesar Cardini's restaurant in 1924. Yep.
So it has nothing to do with Julius Caesar. Nah.

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Speaker 1 So, whatever your game day looks like, remember Miller time is always a good time. Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories.
Go to millerlight.com/slash Dan to find delivery options near you.

Speaker 1 Or you can pick up Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time.

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Anytime someone says Cuervo, I show up.

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Cuervo.