Hour 2: TAYLOR, DEFEND YOURSELF!!! (feat. Anthony Williams a.k.a. Jason 'The Jet' Mason)

Speaker 2 All right, Smirnoff, official vodka of the NFL, world's number one vodka. Chris Cody, you're with me here.

Speaker 4 Smirnoff!

Speaker 2 Wow, you're on the money with Smirnoff. Spinoff.
I'm gonna ask you, Chris, what's your favorite game day food? Smirnoff. Not your favorite game day drink.
What's your favorite game day food?

Speaker 6 Smirnoff.

Speaker 2 All right, here's the deal: game day is everything. The noise, the rituals, the passion, the dip, the wings, the dip again.
Spirit off.

Speaker 2 Smirnoff off belongs in that mix because if you're tailgating or hosting or just sitting there checking your fantasy lineup every 30 seconds, you need Smirnoff! Otherwise, it's not a real game day.

Speaker 2 They've been doing it since 1864, which is, I don't even want to do the math. It's a long time.
It's like when Greg Cody was born. They're award-winning.

Speaker 2 They make cocktails super easy and they're all about bringing fans together. So yeah, we do game days.
That's their thing. And if you're over 21, you should too.

Speaker 8 Why, Chris? Smearing off.

Speaker 2 Grab a bottle of Smearinoff at your local retailer and head to Smearinoff.com to find recipes of delicious cocktails perfect for game day. Smearing off.
Please drink responsibly. Smearing off.

Speaker 2 Number 21, vodka distilled from grain, 40% alcohol by volume, the Smearinoff Company. New York, New York.
Please do not share with anyone under legal drinking age. Smearing off.

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Speaker 15 This is the Don Levatar Show with the Stu Gats Podcast.

Speaker 18 It's time for A Dance the Spring!

Speaker 21 And it's brought to you by our friends at DraftKings.

Speaker 22 DraftKings, the crown is yours.

Speaker 2 Jess, what do we got?

Speaker 23 I'm taking the UConn Huskies in the final four against UCLA minus eight and a half. I think UConn's offense is too much, too multifaceted for UCLA to handle.
I think they win that game easily.

Speaker 18 Again, it's the first spring.

Speaker 6 Philly brings us home.

Speaker 2 I'm going to head to the ice

Speaker 25 where the Panthers are taking on the Toronto Maple Leafs in Toronto. Now, Toronto's coming in winning two straight.
The Panthers are coming in losing two straight.

Speaker 25 Teams have played against each other twice this year. Panthers have beat the Maple Leafs both times that they faced each other.
But again, one is coming in hot, one is coming in cold.

Speaker 25 Is this the game where the Maple Leafs take down the defending Stanley Cup champion, Florida Panthers? Maybe.

Speaker 26 I don't know, but I'm going to take the Panthers plus one and a half because one and a half goals is a lot in hockey.

Speaker 25 So I'm not saying the Panthers are going to win or lose but i think they're going to cover against

Speaker 13 spring

Speaker 29 thank you for doing that guys we also have i i believe that we're closing in on an interview with jason mason the runner who was behind our beloved taylor in that race we also have my guy jason goff who's a podcast host at the ringer he joined me last night in going out with charlie and charlie's high school friend so So I'm going to bring Jason in at some point to tell all the embarrassing stories from Charlie's high school experience.

Speaker 29 But I guess Jason could probably come in too for this topic. Jason's a big basketball guy, works for the Bulls pre- and post-game show, I believe.

Speaker 12 Yeah, him and Kendall Gill.

Speaker 17 Yep.

Speaker 29 But this topic, Amin got beef with our coverage or our opinions on John Morant from yesterday, right?

Speaker 12 Yeah, man, you guys really dropped the ball. You're talking about why Taylor Jenkins was fired this late in the season.

Speaker 12 By the way, I don't think we have a definitive answer for that because it's kind of ridiculous. I don't know if you guys, I can't remember if you guys mentioned this.

Speaker 12 His entire staff had gotten fired prior to this season, which in the NBA is the ultimate. We said that.
Get your black ass up out of here, right?

Speaker 12 Even though his name is Jenkins, he's white.

Speaker 12 But number two, you guys talk about the offense. You can't piss off the best player.

Speaker 11 It wasn't his offense.

Speaker 12 It wasn't his offense. The offense was devised by, get this, the two new assistants, one of whom is now the head coach and the other one is fired.
And I'm just like, wait a second, hold on.

Speaker 12 You're going to take my staff away from me. You're going to hire somebody else that I didn't have a say in.

Speaker 12 Then you're going to tell these somebody else's to devise the offense, even though our offense was okay last year, right?

Speaker 12 And then when the star player doesn't like it, you're going to use that as an excuse to get rid of me.

Speaker 12 This is, ladies and gentlemen, not like Taylor Jenkins misstepping or whatever. This is classic textbook.
We're getting you up out of here.

Speaker 29 So who wanted him up out of there? You're saying, oh,

Speaker 12 the whiz kid Wall Street front office that thinks that, hey, man, let me give this head coaching job to this man from Finland who's never been in an NBA capacity in any form or fashion prior to this season when we brought him here from his illustrious record of winning the Euro Cup and the Basketball Champions League and every other league over there that's not really one of the heralded ones that come.

Speaker 12 Let me put it this way: this guy isn't David Black. And

Speaker 12 I'm not trying to knock him. He might be the best coach of all time one day.
I don't know. I don't know because his resume is super thin.
He's not David Black. David Black came here.

Speaker 12 This dude won Euro leagues. This dude coached like the biggest clubs in Europe.
Like national team coaching. He had a real resume.
Unfortunately, he didn't have an NBA resume.

Speaker 12 And so the NBA guys didn't really respect him. And he didn't do himself any favors either.
in this case

Speaker 12 Tomas Isolo is his name

Speaker 12 he comes from as I said from coaching in Germany in France some okay clubs at okay levels but not the highest levels of European basketball not domestic and not the continental championship of the Euro league

Speaker 12 And this is the guy who's going to be the head coach of your NBA franchise now.

Speaker 12 That to me is the galaxy brain of like front offices where like, I know the best coach. He's not even here.
Like, oh, oh, you guys are listening to that?

Speaker 12 Like, oh, I know this indie band that only plays for five people. That's what they're doing.

Speaker 29 Can you make it make sense, though? Like, I get, I think the harder, if you can't, that's fine.

Speaker 7 But the harder, the easier thing to do is like, this doesn't make any sense.

Speaker 29 This is crazy. They're just trying to be way ahead of anybody.

Speaker 29 If I was challenging you to make a positive argument for this decision, because I think we all were, even if you say that we had it wrong, we all agreed that it was shocking and it didn't quite give him the best chance.

Speaker 29 How could someone convince themselves that this is going to be good?

Speaker 12 I would say the only reason I can think of, and it's a pretty dastardly one from a basketball standpoint, is, oh shit, if we let him rock with this, what if he goes on a huge playoff run?

Speaker 12 Then we got to keep him. I really want my indie pick from Finland.
You get rid of him now. My argument was you knew he wasn't your guy the moment you fired his entire staff and gave him

Speaker 12 his assistant coaches. Why didn't you just fire him then?

Speaker 33 Why give him the, oh, well, we owe it to him.

Speaker 12 Why you don't owe him to him nine more games in a playoff run then? So to me, it's just, again, this is just the ridiculousness of NBA front offices that far too often skate.

Speaker 12 We're really good at blaming coaches. We're really good as a culture.
It's all the coaches. I can't believe that.
We never bring up the front offices' role in all this.

Speaker 12 and you of all people dominique mr tanking is bad like i would think that you would be mr call out all these front offices out here instead of picking on poor taylor jenkins man i didn't pick on poor taylor jenkins you called him a bum and you told him get the hell up out of here i didn't call him a bum and tell him get the hell up out of here

Speaker 29 i did he's a bum you call him no i think that i was i was embodying the voice of the team where it's like you bum get up out of here I don't think Taylor Jenkins is a bum.

Speaker 29 I'm not qualified to evaluate Taylor Jenkins as an NBA coach, but I do think that understanding that

Speaker 29 part of your responsibility is creating buy-in. And I think that's become more of a job for coaches than it has been in the past where we've moved.

Speaker 29 And I think this speaks to some of the things that you were saying earlier about how you talk to players now is kind of different.

Speaker 29 Like, yeah, the way that you have to manage the team now is different than it was in the past. And just saying like, John Morand is being petulant is not going to be a defense.

Speaker 29 And I don't know where you got that voice from. I know you like to do imitations, but you don't hear that bass?

Speaker 3 You don't hear that melanin?

Speaker 37 I think he was just throwing shade, just trying to come at you.

Speaker 27 I'm secure.

Speaker 29 Look at me.

Speaker 3 Got a haircut yesterday. Well, it's easy to be secure around to me.

Speaker 37 It's easy. All right.

Speaker 38 He's a sniper.

Speaker 4 He's a talented.

Speaker 38 He's a talented sniper at that. You know, he's got the whole affect of

Speaker 38 basketball insider, genius, knowledgeable man, but he can also be cool in the streets. Hey, Jason.
He's got that, you know, two-pronged attack.

Speaker 12 Jason, how's the flock doing?

Speaker 35 You need to, so

Speaker 38 this is why you don't make friends in this industry. Because they let you down at some point by being themselves truly, and they do it upon meeting.

Speaker 38 Like, the first time I actually interacted with Amin,

Speaker 26 he really cut me deep.

Speaker 38 You know, fresh off of flight, I was wearing a suit. I was taught to dress up when you get on airplanes, you know, first generation born here.
My foreigner parents instilled that in me.

Speaker 37 And I do that to this day. You get off a flight, you should look good.

Speaker 38 Had to go to a meeting where Amin was there.

Speaker 12 You could call it a meeting.

Speaker 41 It was a meetup.

Speaker 12 We were at Tap 42 at Aventura Mall.

Speaker 18 Hey, I don't know where I'm at.

Speaker 42 I don't know where I'm at. It's a city that I don't frequent.

Speaker 14 You know, I got a mixer.

Speaker 12 It's one of those mixers they do. Like, oh, it's a mixer.

Speaker 14 And I'm like, all right, cool.

Speaker 23 They have a great chopped salad there.

Speaker 43 I wish I'd have known, Jess. You know, I'd have worn my chopped salad suit.

Speaker 35 But instead, I pull up and he called me a shady youth pastor because I look like a young man who was a role model, you know, instead of these dregs of society running around in t-shirts and shorts and you know, cutoffs.

Speaker 35 You know, like I had to show up. You look great today.

Speaker 45 Hey, first, thank you. You look great.
I appreciate it.

Speaker 12 I've never said he doesn't look great. He's always very well dressed.
I'm just saying, on that day.

Speaker 26 He was overdressed a little bit.

Speaker 12 He looked like he might have been back.

Speaker 27 That's why

Speaker 12 the night off.

Speaker 17 He looked like he said, close the door.

Speaker 17 Close the door.

Speaker 49 We're not leaving until the congregation raises raises $40,000.

Speaker 19 40 Rex.

Speaker 12 40 Rex. They said he found Jesus down in Miami.
I'm top bitch.

Speaker 51 That's why I must go.

Speaker 52 That's where most people find Jesus, is down on South Beach, right?

Speaker 3 The morning after.

Speaker 27 You were looking for him. I don't know if you found him.

Speaker 43 That's why these coaches don't get no respect now.

Speaker 38 It's because they're not dressing like the gentlemen that they used to have to dress like.

Speaker 14 Now he's out here in basketball clothes and stuff. Exactly.

Speaker 38 The likes of me and El Hassan, you know, shooting down their dreams.

Speaker 37 Now, that's the problem, too, when you draft,

Speaker 38 you draft a talent that you know is going to be wildly impactful in your city and change your basketball culture.

Speaker 38 You just have to hope that he's mature enough to get you through some of the bad coaches as well, right?

Speaker 45 Or some of the bad front office management.

Speaker 38 Like, I'm glad you mentioned that thing about front offices because there are too many NBA front offices running around that aren't up to par. And all we do is cycle through coaches that are good.

Speaker 37 coaches.

Speaker 38 Like, how long did we know Kenny Atkinson was a decent coach before Brooklyn had to let him go?

Speaker 40 And now he's doing what he's doing in in Cleveland with talent and people who buy in?

Speaker 12 Like, that, that he was a good coach in Brooklyn, and the knock on him was like, yeah, but those guys don't like you.

Speaker 37 Karis Lavert is really not, you know, Spencer didn't want you on your side.

Speaker 12 So you're out, and then it's like, all right, that was it, buddy. Go ahead.
Like, and that. Phenomenon is even bigger when it comes to black coaches.

Speaker 12 Don't be a black coach and get fired.

Speaker 8 Like, that might be it. Yeah, JB.

Speaker 39 Head on back to the bottom.

Speaker 1 So JB is like

Speaker 12 the exception to the rule.

Speaker 38 Wes Entel Jr.

Speaker 33 Where's Wes?

Speaker 12 Wes is a good example, right?

Speaker 33 Wes is the rule.

Speaker 12 Stephen Silas.

Speaker 12 So, as long as I've worked in the NBA, Stephen Silas has been in the NBA. Everyone's always like, this guy, all these players that I know were played with, you know, where he was an assistant.

Speaker 12 That guy's great. He's going to be a great head coach.

Speaker 38 I always stopped it for him when Billy got the Bulls job.

Speaker 12 So, Stephen Silas gets the job in Houston. Finally, all right, got Harden, you got Westbrook.
You're going to take us to this next era, post-Mike Dantoni. He's like, cool.

Speaker 12 And then, like, Harden's like, I want to get traded.

Speaker 8 And then Westbrook, like, I want to get traded too.

Speaker 12 And so essentially, he's given a bunch of babies. Kids, yeah.
Kids, basically, who don't know anything. Not that they're not talented, but they're just not a team that's ready to win.

Speaker 12 And he gets fired. And I'm like,

Speaker 12 does Stephen Silas get a fair shake? And then once he's out, does he get a shake anywhere else? That's it.

Speaker 38 How does that translate to the NFL, though?

Speaker 37 Because guys like Sean McDermott.

Speaker 12 Don't give him a chance over there.

Speaker 4 You give him a chance.

Speaker 27 Talk about coaches, period.

Speaker 52 That black coaches, you know, you're not coaching an NFL team.

Speaker 40 But guys like Sean McDermott who pop up, or remember, who was it back in the day?

Speaker 36 Like the black coach was Sherman Lewis, I believe it was.

Speaker 27 Like, man, he's a great offensive coordinator, but boy, he ain't never gonna get a head coaching job.

Speaker 38 Like the guys who stick in the NFL every once in a while, like, where this guy comes from, you give him a quarterback, next thing you know, they're there for half a decade.

Speaker 29 We'll get back to that in a second, but we have uh-oh, a guest.

Speaker 17 No,

Speaker 17 we got got him.

Speaker 41 We got him. We got Anthony Williams, a.k.a.
Jason, the Jet Mason, in the building.

Speaker 44 The man who cooked that bum Taylor.

Speaker 56 What's up, Jason Mason?

Speaker 57 How you guys doing?

Speaker 48 I mean, his name is Anthony.

Speaker 9 I think you're Anthony.

Speaker 31 I'm sorry, Anthony. I didn't mean no disrespect.

Speaker 58 I thought Jason Mason was a cool nickname.

Speaker 45 That's dope.

Speaker 28 He was flying around the track.

Speaker 31 Taylor, I will have you know, Jason.

Speaker 32 So welcome to the show.

Speaker 29 Thank you so much.

Speaker 29 Appreciate it. Taylor been popping trash, talking about how he cooked you and he could cook me and cook everybody on the track.

Speaker 29 I was wondering, sir, if you have any rebuttal to what Taylor was saying.

Speaker 4 You were a hell of Taylor.

Speaker 57 So my buddy actually sent it to me. Did some research.
So for Taylor, our team actually won that race.

Speaker 57 Taylor ran a great leg. I'll give him his credit.

Speaker 57 I'm not a 400 runner. I was a hurdler in college and high school, state champion, All-American.

Speaker 13 Resume.

Speaker 19 I'm a hurdler.

Speaker 57 I'm not a 400 specialist, but we did win that race as a team. So we got that.

Speaker 29 You let young Calvin Sampson pull away from you. It sounds like what you're saying to me.

Speaker 29 He increased the gap.

Speaker 19 I'll tell you what I heard.

Speaker 57 I remember he had some wheels on him.

Speaker 59 I'll give him that.

Speaker 60 All right, let's see more shade. Taylor, get up here.

Speaker 13 Yeah, we got him.

Speaker 14 He had some wheels on him.

Speaker 46 It's Shade.

Speaker 61 A-10 champ. Salute to you, Anthony.

Speaker 57 Appreciate you. Appreciate you.

Speaker 61 I believe we got the baton at the same time, and I handed it off before you, but

Speaker 61 that's neither here nor there.

Speaker 57 That's fair. That's fair.

Speaker 59 I looked you up.

Speaker 57 You were an athlete. I give you credit, man.
I give credit where it's due, man.

Speaker 14 Yes, again, you trade respect.

Speaker 12 Taylor Anthony.

Speaker 57 But hey, but like I said, 4x4 is not my thing.

Speaker 24 I'm a hurler.

Speaker 12 Taylor Anthony's saying, like, this was a hobby for him. The thing that he was actually great at, state champ.

Speaker 12 He was putting up numbers and banners. Stand champ, conference champ.
All right, so what banners were you putting up?

Speaker 61 I didn't, I quit after my first year.

Speaker 46 I will say, I will say this.

Speaker 25 Everyone's being very respectful to each other, but Anthony, I will tell you that Taylor had his numbers out there on the computer and he was circling his comparisons to yours.

Speaker 25 And he was saying that he was faster than you in high school.

Speaker 14 No.

Speaker 57 That's so.

Speaker 57 Like I said, I'm a hurdler. Hurling is my specialty, man.

Speaker 43 You know what I can tell, though?

Speaker 12 Are we judging Nellie by his country album? No, we're not doing that.

Speaker 3 I am.

Speaker 29 I can tell a dog when I meet one.

Speaker 3 And Taylor, you're not a dog.

Speaker 8 I'm listening to my man Anthony.

Speaker 48 No, no, no.

Speaker 6 Wait, Taylor, start barking.

Speaker 28 Hold on.

Speaker 48 Get that garbage off the screen.

Speaker 12 It is.

Speaker 62 I hear.

Speaker 29 I hear it in his voice.

Speaker 7 I see it in his posture.

Speaker 29 That is a calm, confident man. Taylor, you turning red back there.
You got beads of sweat on your head.

Speaker 31 You stuttering and stammering.

Speaker 46 Well, I quit. I quit.

Speaker 33 And the panoramic roof is providing atmosphere as well.

Speaker 19 I can see all that.

Speaker 19 That man.

Speaker 63 The roof wasn't the race, by the way.

Speaker 62 I'm not just being honest with you.

Speaker 64 You can put your hands up against the TV screen and feel the heat.

Speaker 41 I saw Taylor pull up today on a scooter, and my dog got a roof that you can see through.

Speaker 12 It wasn't even electric, either.

Speaker 6 It was manual.

Speaker 14 That dude was

Speaker 56 crazy.

Speaker 50 Taylor, defend yourself. God damn it.

Speaker 34 Taylor was scooting like Punky Brewster in the work while my dog Anthony got a convertible 20-voice seven.

Speaker 4 That man is in a spaceship.

Speaker 14 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 48 Anthony showed up on my show in a spaceship banner

Speaker 64 with Redwoods behind him. Where you at, Anthony?

Speaker 48 You in a national park.

Speaker 14 This is classic.

Speaker 59 I'm at work, man.

Speaker 57 I'm on my lunch break.

Speaker 19 Get old.

Speaker 24 Oh, he's handling light work on his break.

Speaker 47 On his lunch break, I'm going to come out here and get a little snack.

Speaker 56 and my snack's going to be named Taylor.

Speaker 34 Easy.

Speaker 18 Oh,

Speaker 48 hey, I don't want to hear nothing.

Speaker 8 No, no, no, no, no, no,

Speaker 17 no, get out of here, scoot.

Speaker 17 This is called

Speaker 65 TB talk, where I've been saying to Dominique, let's go.

Speaker 61 And all he keeps doing is talk, talk, talk.

Speaker 14 I got my running shoes on.

Speaker 19 The reverse card.

Speaker 17 I'm ready.

Speaker 6 I like the reverse card.

Speaker 61 I showed Chris Cody where we could do this race, and Dominique shows up today. He goes,

Speaker 14 I think I might be hurt.

Speaker 18 I think I might be hurt.

Speaker 48 That is everything that I've said so far is true.

Speaker 41 I did not fake an injury.

Speaker 29 What I did today, I walked in and I looked at you and I sized you up and you ain't had no engine.

Speaker 9 And I got more confidence.

Speaker 23 Wait, let me see your cakes.

Speaker 20 Tell you what.

Speaker 56 What?

Speaker 39 I think it's fine.

Speaker 48 No engine.

Speaker 31 There's no burst in there. There's no power in that.

Speaker 6 Can we see Anthony's?

Speaker 48 Nope.

Speaker 42 Anthony don't need to show you.

Speaker 56 He wants to be in the show.

Speaker 17 Yeah.

Speaker 58 Look at that man.

Speaker 29 So where are you, Anthony, if you don't mind me asking?

Speaker 32 What part of the world?

Speaker 57 So I'm in South Carolina. So after Mason has joined the military, this year's Army.

Speaker 24 Victoria's circle.

Speaker 20 Yo, he is winning on every level.

Speaker 46 Taylor, you're the Shannon man.

Speaker 20 I saved two babies last week.

Speaker 12 Meanwhile, Taylor over here eating lunch before it gets laid out for everybody.

Speaker 14 Yo,

Speaker 66 yo.

Speaker 24 What do you do?

Speaker 12 That's what he does, man. They go feast like the middle.

Speaker 42 They bring out their lunch.

Speaker 58 That's the type of dude he is.

Speaker 29 Just so you know, Anthony, is that Taylor's the type of dude that they set out to lunch and we don't go on break to get lunch and Tail out there just squirreling away little sandwiches so we can get some

Speaker 3 and he's out of here, Scoot Scoot.

Speaker 29 I appreciate it, man. So you said you joined the military, you're still in the military now?

Speaker 57 Um, no, so I'm a veteran, fresh veteran. Uh, last day officially was March 7th.

Speaker 37 So congratulations on the great private.

Speaker 18 Thank you for your service.

Speaker 14 Yeah, man, thank you.

Speaker 57 It's a pleasure to serve. Thank you.

Speaker 16 Thank you.

Speaker 14 What branch?

Speaker 19 Army. Oh,

Speaker 18 yes.

Speaker 31 My dad did 20 in the Army, man.

Speaker 35 My dad did 20.

Speaker 27 This is the greatest black role model that was ever done on this show.

Speaker 14 Ever.

Speaker 3 Tiveramines. Ever.

Speaker 6 Like I said.

Speaker 14 Ever.

Speaker 14 Oh, man.

Speaker 29 Well, thank you so much for joining us. Any parting words you want to have for Taylor or anyone?

Speaker 19 No, it's all love.

Speaker 57 If you guys, Shameless Plug, there's a track meet for my best friend who passed away, Devin Brewer Invitational. So I'll drop you guys a link or something if you want to submit.

Speaker 57 For sure. We have a scholarship foundation.
So, yeah, like I said, all love. Taylor, hey, blessings to you, man.

Speaker 22 He's gone already.

Speaker 14 My. Man, I love this guy.

Speaker 18 So we fired Taylor.

Speaker 51 When they kill you with kindness. That's the thing.

Speaker 54 I was this whole time.

Speaker 31 This is the worst kind of enemy.

Speaker 8 You know, they're like, hey, man, I wish you and your family nothing but the best.

Speaker 38 And hopefully your children can look in your eyes and see a winner when they think about me.

Speaker 5 You know what I mean?

Speaker 29 We'll put that in the show notes. It will definitely make a contribution.
We appreciate everything that you've done for us. Thank you so much for joining our show.

Speaker 29 The final question, though, is: what's your Uber rating?

Speaker 66 Ooh,

Speaker 32 I mean, I'm a 4-9 guy. Are you in the

Speaker 45 only way Taylor's going to get a win?

Speaker 17 Are you a dot-nine boy?

Speaker 29 Are you a dot-nine boy or no?

Speaker 57 I prefer to drive my soap places, so I'm not really a little boy.

Speaker 41 USA,

Speaker 34 USA, USA, Javante

Speaker 8 Thank you.

Speaker 14 Thank you for joining me.

Speaker 27 Appreciate you. Thank you for having me.
I looked up your middle name.

Speaker 29 That's how I know you fast. Yeah.

Speaker 52 Any brother named Javante that way.

Speaker 16 Yeah, that's...

Speaker 4 Oh, man.

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Speaker 21 You're like, why didn't I do that sooner? It's the same thing with therapy. Reaching out can feel weird at first, but once you do it, it helps.

Speaker 68 BetterHelp makes it easy.

Speaker 21 They've got over 30,000 licensed therapists and have helped more than 5 million people. They've been at it for more than 12 years, guys.
They've got a 4.9 rating from more than 1.7 million reviews.

Speaker 21 This month, don't wait to reach out. Whether you're checking in on a friend or reaching out to a therapist for yourself, BetterHelp makes it easier to take that first step.

Speaker 21 And our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com slash DLB. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash DLB.

Speaker 26 Don Lebatard.

Speaker 29 I took my son to the barbershop, get a haircut, and my man gave out some limp dap.

Speaker 22 Oh no.

Speaker 22 Damn, damn, damn.

Speaker 29 Stugats. I disowned him.

Speaker 3 I threw him right under the bus.

Speaker 29 I was like, whose kid is that out here dishing out limp dap?

Speaker 26 This is the Dan Labatar show with the Stugats.

Speaker 39 I don't know how I feel about you volunteering my bread, though.

Speaker 14 That was crazy.

Speaker 64 You think we're all going to make donations?

Speaker 34 Oh, no, no, no.

Speaker 50 I meant I.

Speaker 19 I meant I.

Speaker 19 You said we. You got the right.

Speaker 34 We, brother. We're not going to.

Speaker 23 On behalf of Dan Labatar, Netalark Media will be donating three.

Speaker 34 No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 41 I don't care for you. My feeling is we're a team.
ECOSCO MAC.

Speaker 29 I was planning to make the contribution, but I said it's we.

Speaker 46 Like we. I didn't make it.

Speaker 27 I have gotten by many a GoFundMe.

Speaker 29 I would have thought the wrong way to do that was say, I will make a donation. Like, I intentionally said

Speaker 29 if I say, I'm going to make a donation, then it puts everyone in an awkward situation to also have to say I.

Speaker 20 So I meant

Speaker 29 I should have said I on behalf of Amin and Jason and everyone else am going to make a donation.

Speaker 36 Yeah, to do that, yeah, make it big, too.

Speaker 14 I mean, whoa, whoa,

Speaker 64 chill, chill, chill. I said, I'm gonna put something on it.

Speaker 56 I said, I'm gonna put something,

Speaker 14 put something on it.

Speaker 60 Oh, five dollars.

Speaker 45 I'm not trying to send

Speaker 58 you, I'm not trying to send all the kids to school.

Speaker 13 When you said it, you golfing, I got immediately like, hey, bro, I got a two, two-month-old, and an eight-year-old.

Speaker 4 I got my own charities, I gotta take care of it.

Speaker 14 Me too.

Speaker 12 Cowboys basketball, man.

Speaker 46 That costs a lot of money, huh?

Speaker 8 Oh, my God.

Speaker 8 You can still hear all this.

Speaker 8 He was on the Zoom the whole time.

Speaker 6 Oh, yeah. I saw him.

Speaker 14 I saw.

Speaker 6 I can see him. That's fine.
I mean, he's laughing. We can say nothing.

Speaker 20 That's Taylor.

Speaker 53 Should we check on Taylor? That was rough.

Speaker 47 That was rough for him.

Speaker 14 Give him a snack.

Speaker 29 Taylor did his best. He tried to redirect it to me.
That was a smart move.

Speaker 27 That was a good move.

Speaker 29 But what he don't know is...

Speaker 5 He's actually wanting to get food right now.

Speaker 12 I knew it.

Speaker 56 I told y'all.

Speaker 41 Caught him in the kitchen.

Speaker 42 Got him in the kitchen.

Speaker 17 This setup, though,

Speaker 38 this is a majestic setup, by the the way.

Speaker 36 I got to be honest with you.

Speaker 52 I've been around a lot of things and a lot of entities.

Speaker 38 You guys got the food. You got the machine that was making April Fool's Day.

Speaker 43 That was nonsense.

Speaker 65 Our water machine yesterday, I tried to get it.

Speaker 22 It's just like, hey, here's, you know, pineapple butter water.

Speaker 3 I'm like, what?

Speaker 6 April Fool's Day.

Speaker 23 Wait, our bevy is making April Fool's Day.

Speaker 17 Yeah, I see.

Speaker 41 It pissed me off because it's water.

Speaker 14 Like, I need it to live.

Speaker 49 Don't you joke around.

Speaker 20 Like, it's like if the trees was like, hey, no no oxygen today, April fools.

Speaker 23 There's lead in here.

Speaker 14 Hold on.

Speaker 12 How many of us think too soon, Jeff?

Speaker 12 How many of us truly believe if the machine told Chris we have butter water?

Speaker 40 Pineapple butter.

Speaker 22 I don't know how I got that.

Speaker 23 You came up with that so quickly. I got caught up in the air.

Speaker 64 I said pineapple, and then I realized that's a normal water flavor.

Speaker 3 So I got to go somewhere.

Speaker 55 So I went to pineapple butter.

Speaker 12 It's not that the flavor is unimaginable. It's that you would over say, no.

Speaker 39 You'd be like, butter water?

Speaker 6 I'll take it for a walk.

Speaker 38 But also like, you don't know what kind of day I'm having, Machine. Yeah.

Speaker 42 You know what I mean?

Speaker 35 Like, ain't not time for your quirkiness. You know what I mean?

Speaker 5 I just got off a bad meeting.

Speaker 23 No one's ever like, I wish that my water machine told me jokes.

Speaker 12 Hold on, y'all want to hear the worst April Fools I've ever fallen for in my life, and it happened yesterday.

Speaker 12 And this is the scariest part. I think I got the oldest kid among anyone in here.
Yeah.

Speaker 21 Was it Tiger Woods saying he's playing the Masters?

Speaker 12 No, this is way worse, bro this is way worse my kid hands me this sheet and it's a jumble it's like dad can you help me with this i can't i can't get any of the words and so i look at it and i'm usually good at the the jumble whatever and i'm like oh there you go just like one of them is like multiplying or whatever just look for an ing and you got it like yeah i can't seem to find it then i'm like yeah just look for the ing it's right there

Speaker 19 can you show me where it is I said, well, it's somewhere in there.

Speaker 12 And I'm looking and I'm like, I'm like trying to buy myself time.

Speaker 51 I pretended I knew where it was.

Speaker 12 And then my kid was like, it's not on the sheet because this is an April Fool's day.

Speaker 12 And I was just like, oh, oh, no.

Speaker 12 I've been had.

Speaker 12 And I was, I was, I was, I was crushed. And I went downstairs.
I was like, I can't believe it. I can't believe it.
But guess what? And my kid messed up and said, what? And I said, chicken button.

Speaker 47 Got him back.

Speaker 16 Got him back.

Speaker 20 See, I was. Now I have the upper hand again.

Speaker 38 A little harder than that.

Speaker 36 I'm not your dad.

Speaker 39 Like, immediately.

Speaker 17 You know, raise the stakes.

Speaker 24 You know what I mean?

Speaker 34 Look at him right in the eye.

Speaker 19 April Fool's.

Speaker 8 Then you got hit with a slow one.

Speaker 51 Hit him with a slow one.

Speaker 36 Gotcha.

Speaker 37 Go ask mommy about the secret we've been keeping from you.

Speaker 21 I'm just like picturing the meeting at the Bevy headquarters.

Speaker 22 And they're like, hey guys, I got an idea.

Speaker 12 On April Fool's Day, we hit them with a joke.

Speaker 40 And they're like, that's good.

Speaker 2 That's a good meeting, everyone.

Speaker 31 What if?

Speaker 12 What if the Bevy went sentient on us?

Speaker 12 I have feelings too. I also can tell jokes.
Say, what is a butter pecan pineapple butter pop water?

Speaker 40 Actually, I'm thinking we should start a market now for pineapple butter water.

Speaker 61 I try it.

Speaker 47 No,

Speaker 56 take it.

Speaker 35 Take it outside.

Speaker 23 What if it played an April Fool's joke on Dan and was like, here's your orange water?

Speaker 60 And Dan was like, no!

Speaker 14 That's right, Dan.

Speaker 14 He's allergic to everything.

Speaker 12 Orange steak, garlic,

Speaker 23 pecan water.

Speaker 29 I mean, he believes he is.

Speaker 27 He gets blood in the alley.

Speaker 31 Dan's an unusual character, but we love Dan.

Speaker 1 You would have loved the GERD interview.

Speaker 70 We've We've asked so many questions about gastrointestinal distress.

Speaker 12 Hey, Mike Ryan tried to ask Keenan Thompson about GERD.

Speaker 17 Why? No,

Speaker 29 in Mike's defense, it was my fault.

Speaker 14 Why are you standing down? Why are you hand up?

Speaker 29 I created the circumstances that put Mike in a bad situation.

Speaker 8 I'm not going to leave you.

Speaker 33 You're going to late in the shot clock. Yeah,

Speaker 58 I couldn't get it up to court. And so I passed it to Mike to get it up to court.

Speaker 23 No, but Mike was also looking for a pass. And if you didn't pass it, he was just going to steal it.

Speaker 45 That's fine. But I mean,

Speaker 3 I know.

Speaker 6 He's like, I'm getting in here with a question. So

Speaker 38 I landed during the Steve Williams interview.

Speaker 52 Woof.

Speaker 63 And boy.

Speaker 17 That was

Speaker 35 exceptional.

Speaker 14 Steve, how many golfers could you beat on you? That was the greatest question of the

Speaker 20 question of the year.

Speaker 23 What about with your fists?

Speaker 35 On any platform.

Speaker 42 News, political talk, weather channel, like anybody that's been interviewed.

Speaker 43 My man just told a ripcord, like, by the way, who ass could you whip on the tour?

Speaker 53 God, this is my favorite part. It is a tiger.

Speaker 62 This man.

Speaker 45 Please say tiger.

Speaker 12 This man is a graduate of the University of Maryland, a fine institution, Harvard Business School.

Speaker 12 He was president of like the Players Association and all the negotiating CBAs in two different sports, by the way, which

Speaker 12 unheard of. Like everything on paper, Dominique is like, wow, this is a Renaissance man.
Put him on a mic horn. He turns into regular football.

Speaker 17 Hey, Chris.

Speaker 60 Chris, this is your time.

Speaker 53 Chris, you have a question for the guest?

Speaker 5 Oh, yeah, I did hear.

Speaker 9 I did. Chris, what you got?

Speaker 53 Chris, it's your time to talk, right?

Speaker 27 So, as a former producer, in that moment, I was like, oh, he don't know what a talkback button is.

Speaker 43 Like, your talkback button is right here.

Speaker 20 I had been using it all show.

Speaker 17 That's the worst thing.

Speaker 20 You've been using it all show. Let me ask what kind of the setup here.

Speaker 38 Do they turn your mics on and off for you?

Speaker 31 No, I can press this on and off.

Speaker 36 Because

Speaker 20 I have produced for talent who's like, who would look at the mic

Speaker 12 come into the segment and just look at it and be like, yeah, the mic going to have to turn itself on, huh?

Speaker 14 I'm like, come on, dog.

Speaker 45 Help me out here.

Speaker 31 It's the worst part is that I knew all of these things.

Speaker 29 I have hosted this show many a time quite well.

Speaker 27 And the show was going great up until then.

Speaker 41 I fell apart.

Speaker 27 That was great.

Speaker 43 No excuses. That was great.

Speaker 35 That was fun, bad.

Speaker 9 So, John Vanta, do you do brackets?

Speaker 12 John Vanta, do you do brackets?

Speaker 38 What's the worst question that you've asked on this platform?

Speaker 12 At this show or in general?

Speaker 62 Just keep it here.

Speaker 37 At this show,

Speaker 29 I know you must have got one in your mind, James.

Speaker 34 Oh, you mean

Speaker 58 if you're asking the question.

Speaker 38 Listen, I have a ton of awful questions that I have asked guests, and you just sit there and you're like, ooh, this is.

Speaker 31 Right, no, I want to know what yours are.

Speaker 17 Why are we buying?

Speaker 31 I'm buying time for a main or anything.

Speaker 14 I want to buy time.

Speaker 55 While we buy time, here's one question that Dan asked a NASCAR driver: What is the worst part of the life?

Speaker 31 Now we wait for the rest of it. You wait for the rest of it?

Speaker 8 That's it.

Speaker 69 What is the worst part of the life?

Speaker 23 Wait, now we have to play the entire thing with the reply from the person that Dan was interviewing.

Speaker 38 Yeah, because if you're an interviewee.

Speaker 69 What is the worst part of the life?

Speaker 61 Four seconds of silence.

Speaker 1 The worst part of the life of what?

Speaker 8 It was brutal.

Speaker 38 That's tough.

Speaker 30 That's tough.

Speaker 29 I mean, what's yours?

Speaker 38 I asked Kenny Satterfield one time, what was he going to do after basketball while he was still in college?

Speaker 52 And it wasn't like...

Speaker 64 It's not that bad. No, but it is, though.

Speaker 6 It is. No, it is.

Speaker 35 Because when you're talking to a college athlete and they're thinking, yo, pro somewhere, you know, keep it shaking and moving.

Speaker 27 And I was like, yeah, Kenny,

Speaker 27 Barber College, like, what are we thinking here?

Speaker 3 What are we doing here?

Speaker 3 You're right.

Speaker 20 No, no, no.

Speaker 63 We're usually right when we ask

Speaker 40 those kinds of awful questions.

Speaker 53 Like, he was right.

Speaker 43 He wanted to know who Steven is.

Speaker 42 Steven Williams wanted to say who he beat up before.

Speaker 29 I need no defense.

Speaker 27 I accept that I blew it.

Speaker 29 Like, I don't need no defense.

Speaker 23 To be fair, it was the first interview on the first day with someone from a sport that is not in our wheelhouse. I'm shooting your bail.
That would have maybe also not gone well, even if Dan was here.

Speaker 23 That maybe perhaps needed, I don't know, Stugatz to be present for because he is the golf guy that has been absent for a month and a half.

Speaker 48 No bail needed.

Speaker 46 I'm going to do that.

Speaker 29 but as we know, accountability plays.

Speaker 30 I'm going to do my bid.

Speaker 9 I deserve all the ridicule.

Speaker 58 What I'm not going to do is pretend like I cooked that interview. I smoked that interview.

Speaker 49 The interview was not cooked.

Speaker 58 It was smoked.

Speaker 9 Every other segment, however, I will not lie to you.

Speaker 58 Been cooking segment after segment. Bucket.

Speaker 17 We're back up now. Bucket.

Speaker 30 Bucket.

Speaker 58 Just so you know, distribute it.

Speaker 49 Give me a new teammate. That's all right.

Speaker 58 I get you to ball where you like it, just like Magic Johnson. It don't matter.

Speaker 9 I've been balling ever since then.

Speaker 58 However, what I'm not going to do is pretend like those interviews were good because they were atrocious or pretend like it's okay that I point to some other reason why I sucked.

Speaker 29 It's a man on a screen.

Speaker 58 All I had to do was ask some questions. I blew it.

Speaker 12 I want to go back to the, Chris, what you got right here? Which is, which is...

Speaker 12 A little improvement over my favorite interview thing in anywhere, sports, media, entertainment, whatever, is whenever the TNT guys are interviewing the player of the game after the game, where they all, this is Shaq here.

Speaker 12 I'm like, big fella, we know, like, you don't have to announce each other. Like, I love the idea of like Shaq asking a question, just going right to the question.

Speaker 12 The guy's like, oh, I'm sorry, who's talking to me?

Speaker 60 This Ernie?

Speaker 23 If we're going to MMQB the caddy interview, I think we need to give Chris Cody a pat on the back for his question about if he caddies elsewhere other than on the golf course.

Speaker 14 It was a great question.

Speaker 29 Can I tell you one thing that just popped into my mind? There's so many terrible portions of that interview.

Speaker 29 We haven't even talked about the time when I mistakenly pressed the loser game show host button while my man is in the middle of talking.

Speaker 31 Are you hit the prices wrong on him?

Speaker 12 Hit the prices wrong.

Speaker 12 And then like everybody laughed and he explained, my bad, I made a mistake, whatever. And the guy goes back.

Speaker 12 Like you guys had moved on and he goes back to that question.

Speaker 14 He hit multiple buttons after that too.

Speaker 55 My favorite part of that interview.

Speaker 70 The worst part was Tiger, he said that Tiger had no distractions, and that's why he was the greatest of all time. And none of us, none of us had the fortitude to push back on that.

Speaker 70 Not one distraction, Tiger.

Speaker 47 Not one Perkins.

Speaker 12 Shonies, wasn't it? Shones?

Speaker 6 Perkins.

Speaker 20 It was Perkins.

Speaker 8 It was Perkins.

Speaker 41 I mean, Perkins, Shonys, Pennigans.

Speaker 3 I mean,

Speaker 38 shout out to the Pennigans. Get you a Monte Cristo.

Speaker 23 Get you right there. I heard Denny's is in trouble.
It's just like one of the next big chains that's going to...

Speaker 27 I've never eaten at Denny's.

Speaker 7 What? I don't like

Speaker 39 Denny's.

Speaker 49 It's not that I don't like it.

Speaker 23 Dennis around Chicago because I have never been easy.

Speaker 37 If they are, they're on the outskirts, like the Chicagoland area.

Speaker 22 Boons over Miami.

Speaker 52 That's a sandwich.

Speaker 8 Okay, there you go. All right, cool.
Thanks, Chris.

Speaker 52 I'm not a

Speaker 22 lot of people are nodding along.

Speaker 12 Our food correspondent, Chris Cody.

Speaker 8 I like it. I like it.

Speaker 29 You know, I do a lot of jokes that are not for everybody.

Speaker 14 He's going to defend me.

Speaker 35 I'm a fan of Chris Cody and have been.

Speaker 8 Don't be surprised about it.

Speaker 5 No, no.

Speaker 5 No, so

Speaker 27 no, I wasn't doing that, Chris.

Speaker 50 I saw Chris.

Speaker 5 You'll never believe this.

Speaker 56 Didn't think I was going to like him.

Speaker 30 I was pretty sure that guy was in company.

Speaker 19 Probably

Speaker 58 thought he didn't know what he's talking about.

Speaker 63 I came to a revelation.

Speaker 18 Well, you know what? I'm a big fan of Cody Cow.

Speaker 43 He's a warm, inviting big, gentle teddy bear.

Speaker 35 You know what I mean?

Speaker 6 Look at him.

Speaker 60 That's a good man.

Speaker 43 He's got backward letters on the hat, so you know he's down with the culture.

Speaker 39 There it is.

Speaker 59 You get a red.

Speaker 29 Do you know what hat that is. You might take back your culture.

Speaker 40 Hockey culture. There you go.

Speaker 14 Panthers.

Speaker 43 Shout out to the hockey.

Speaker 14 You know, Blackhawks do that.

Speaker 58 Shout out to the hockey.

Speaker 43 I think Chris Cody should be my Miami tour guide this season.

Speaker 16 Oh.

Speaker 39 Chris? You down?

Speaker 64 Because last night.

Speaker 19 Oh, last night.

Speaker 14 Jason Browers.

Speaker 41 These two dudes. I got to get, oh, I will clear the floor for this.

Speaker 31 Because this is really why I wanted Jason to come.

Speaker 43 And Amin, I would love for Amin, but Amin, you know, Amin's not a too cool for school kind of vibe for me.

Speaker 53 Like, Like, we used to be cool.

Speaker 35 I used to come on my little NBA radio show on Sirius XM back in the day.

Speaker 43 You know, that's how we first linked up when I got to Atlanta.

Speaker 54 And ever since then, the, I don't even say friendship, but the attachment has grown apart.

Speaker 37 And he's thrown nothing but barbs at my body.

Speaker 47 My career has blown up.

Speaker 37 But that doesn't mean I can take these barbs any better.

Speaker 43 You know what I mean? I'm still insecure in the middle of it.

Speaker 29 You guys can sort this out in the break. I need you to get to these stories from last night because them stories was cooking.

Speaker 3 I went to...

Speaker 20 I like to Rick Ross's ex-wife.

Speaker 17 Oh, that's right.

Speaker 41 That's what started the night.

Speaker 41 You didn't even mention that.

Speaker 19 Yeah, that kicked off the night.

Speaker 6 Yeah,

Speaker 59 immediately.

Speaker 56 So she invited us out to karaoke.

Speaker 29 She sat next to us, and as she was leaving, she invited us to do, to go do karaoke because apparently she was hosting a karaoke night.

Speaker 45 I forgot.

Speaker 3 It was on her Instagram. She showed us an interview.

Speaker 53 Somewhere called Overtown.

Speaker 47 Oh, yeah, Overtown Subscribers.

Speaker 36 Shout out to Tito. I don't want no smoke.

Speaker 48 No, we didn't want no smoke.

Speaker 8 We didn't want involved in any of this, but that's what kicked off the night.

Speaker 12 Send Charlie to Liberty City.

Speaker 2 Did you go?

Speaker 51 No, we didn't go there.

Speaker 14 No, no.

Speaker 31 But we had our teachers sit next to us who, you know, when teachers get out of town,

Speaker 62 you know how the vibes get.

Speaker 27 You know what I mean? The teachers' little conviction.

Speaker 46 Bring next to us.

Speaker 29 I got...

Speaker 30 Accosted by my favorite people, the old black man.

Speaker 45 Oh,

Speaker 8 old black men.

Speaker 29 Everywhere we go, they like, hey, babe, brother, thank you.

Speaker 42 Keep doing what you're doing.

Speaker 39 I like what you're doing, brother.

Speaker 14 Did they hit you with this?

Speaker 12 Keep representing us out there. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 36 Oh, yeah it's implied what is implied oh the unnatural pressure of being black in front of old black men like you think you think the white people put pressure on you an old black man look at you like hey now i know you're not slipping up the way you you know the mothers are slipping up like i don't even know what i was doing sir i'm getting a soda right now whenever they tell me that the first thing my brain goes to is like the dumbest things i've done for this show oh yeah damn i hope they didn't see that

Speaker 23 you're gonna get your sellout award at the end of black meetings you're just like damn i've disappointed so many old black men today.

Speaker 20 On a daily basis, my dad.

Speaker 3 You know what I mean?

Speaker 20 Wow.

Speaker 12 I once lost the grid of death punishment where I had to do a whole show handcuffed. So

Speaker 12 I showed up dressed like Martin Luther King with his

Speaker 27 numbers.

Speaker 12 The numbers. And I did the whole show like that.

Speaker 17 And then we would put you on a flyer.

Speaker 3 See it all coming up.

Speaker 18 Yeah,

Speaker 29 we introduced Charlie to Martin Luther King Day Club Flyers.

Speaker 6 He was unaware of that.

Speaker 29 And I was like, yeah, you got it.

Speaker 12 Do you know about this?

Speaker 55 Yeah, I do, but tell Billy.

Speaker 27 The cultural exchange is happening, right?

Speaker 12 So like when there's like a, you know, Martin Luther King Day is a holiday. So on Sunday, there's a big party at a club or a day party at a brunch or whatever.

Speaker 12 They'll do the flyer, but on the flyer, it'll be a picture of Martin Luther King, typically in modern garb.

Speaker 4 So with a do-rag.

Speaker 51 Durag on, have a change.

Speaker 29 They'll give him a grill or something like that.

Speaker 32 And then they'll put like

Speaker 3 shaking asses asses next to him.

Speaker 14 A car over there.

Speaker 35 Like he's called him community performance.

Speaker 8 There we go.

Speaker 39 Shaking ass.

Speaker 45 I mean, that's what it is.

Speaker 14 That emotion.

Speaker 4 Like a reflection.

Speaker 14 Like a hologram.

Speaker 47 A hologram.

Speaker 45 You just got to twist it.

Speaker 14 So this is the same Puritan who earlier in the show.

Speaker 6 Puritan. Yes.
How about Puritan?

Speaker 9 When did I present myself as a Puritan?

Speaker 12 When I said Slumpbuster, you grabbed your pearls.

Speaker 35 I go, oh, my God.

Speaker 6 That's not the show we do.

Speaker 8 Shaking ass comes out the next hour, though.

Speaker 63 No doubt.

Speaker 63 Shout out to the MOKSTA.

Speaker 51 We needed one more black guy here.

Speaker 29 I'm forcing us to do this. So, Charlie, Charlie, please stop me if I ever say anything that would get you and your friends in trouble.
But we met his friend last night who's a lawyer, and his name is.

Speaker 1 He's a great guy. Oh, yeah, he's a great guy.
Yeah, no, no.

Speaker 47 So, what did he do?

Speaker 5 It's a great start. It's not, he didn't do anything.

Speaker 8 That's set up.

Speaker 20 Right, it's a great start, right?

Speaker 29 No,

Speaker 29 there was a lot of stories last night. Some of them can make it to the air and some of them can't.
But his friend's name is Buddy Barn Warmer.

Speaker 14 Warper.

Speaker 12 Buddy Barden Warper.

Speaker 39 Barton Warper. Barton Warper.

Speaker 37 He's a created player on Tuesday.

Speaker 29 I think the prom story. I think we can get Clarence for the prom story.

Speaker 29 I think we can get Clarence for the squatter story.

Speaker 66 Ooh, squatter starter.

Speaker 49 What are two lines? They're two squatter stories.

Speaker 29 All right, if we leave names out, can we tell a squatter story?

Speaker 58 Sure.

Speaker 29 Okay, so Buddy was the, in the summer, buddy, they all went to the same school together,

Speaker 29 a private school, all-boys school school in D.C. So Buddy was the janitor during the summer.
He would make some money. He's a stand-up guy.
Stand-up guy. Buddy also was a military man.

Speaker 14 Thank you. Thank you for your service.

Speaker 30 Before he became a lawyer.

Speaker 29 But in the summer, he would make money by cleaning the school. And they had a teammate.
on their football team who got the nickname the mad squatter.

Speaker 6 That's right.

Speaker 4 Okay.

Speaker 29 Because this young man would would go into the section of the school that he knew Buddy was responsible for cleaning and he would squat.

Speaker 40 Come on, shit on the floor.

Speaker 27 Do his business.

Speaker 12 In the middle of the thing?

Speaker 59 Yep.

Speaker 4 Locker room floor.

Speaker 20 Just shit on the floor.

Speaker 27 Just a nervous individual.

Speaker 2 Now I get why you were like, he's a good guy.

Speaker 46 Yeah.

Speaker 49 And Buddy, he would do it routinely, like it was a regular thing, intentionally laughing at it.

Speaker 27 And then Buddy just clean it up.

Speaker 12 Just going about his business.

Speaker 27 Clean it up.

Speaker 26 It's crazy.

Speaker 27 It's the soul of a good white man.

Speaker 8 Because I'm going to tell you right now. Buddy's wife.

Speaker 56 I would have called the police.

Speaker 49 And the squatter was not.

Speaker 45 The squatter was not.

Speaker 29 Buddy played college football also. And

Speaker 29 we happen to have a similar,

Speaker 29 or we have a connection to a strength coach. And Buddy told a story of his strength coach, whom I also know.

Speaker 29 He said, the strength coach

Speaker 3 got really hype on on test day.

Speaker 29 I don't know if you guys know test day. Everyone does the daily test.
Get your max. You try to get your max number on the squat on Benchmark.

Speaker 11 That's what I thought it was, too.

Speaker 45 So on test day,

Speaker 29 the strength coach is trying to get everybody hyped. So he proceeds to rip his shirt open,

Speaker 29 get under the squat rack,

Speaker 29 do four squats.

Speaker 70 With the Texas belt buckle.

Speaker 45 Yes, with the Texas belt buckle.

Speaker 29 Get under a 450-pound squat rack.

Speaker 41 Do four,

Speaker 20 rack it, scream at everyone, take it back off the rack immediately, do five more, then collapse to the ground convulsing.

Speaker 41 This is how we kicking off the test day. This is the energy that he wants it, buddy.

Speaker 49 Seizures.

Speaker 49 Harvard football.

Speaker 5 Ivy League school guys.

Speaker 17 Ivy League school.

Speaker 47 This wasn't even the school.

Speaker 20 This is a strip coach in the Ivy League school.

Speaker 17 He's like, hey,

Speaker 39 I got to do it.

Speaker 35 You're preparing accountants for life

Speaker 27 by dying in front of them on a squat rack.

Speaker 37 Shout out to strength coaches out there.

Speaker 29 Strength coaches are wild dudes. The last story that I've gotten approval to tell is the prom story.
Oh, Lord.

Speaker 70 I took his prom date, so he married mine.

Speaker 36 And not only married, but gave her a beautiful family.

Speaker 29 The idea that I have in my mind is Buddy was mad that Charlie took his prom date.

Speaker 38 I didn't even realize he was mad.

Speaker 31 And then Buddy was like, you know what? You took my prom date.

Speaker 33 I'm going to marry your prom date and i'm gonna be a great husband and a great father to the children i'm gonna dedicate my life to avenging the prom date stealing bastard you are and i think one of his kids named is charlie to be honest yeah

Speaker 62 yeah yeah i wish yeah

Speaker 10 now is a good time to remember where tequila's story truly began in 1795 quervo invented tequila quervo what are you doing here Quervo.

Speaker 11 Anytime someone says Cuervo, I show up.

Speaker 10 Well, I do know that to be true, but even during ad reads, like, Cuervo. I think you could lay out, especially for one of our great partners.

Speaker 12 Sweet, delicious Cuervo.

Speaker 10 Since then, Cuervo has stayed true to its roots. The same family, the same land, the same passion.
Cuervo. So, enjoy the tequila that started it all.
Cuervo. Cuervo.
The tequila that invented tequila.

Speaker 14 Brooksimo, Cuervo.com, please drink responsibly. Cuervo.

Speaker 10 Folks, the leaves are turning. The weather's getting a little chillier.
That means the football games are more important.

Speaker 3 That means football time should be Miller time.

Speaker 10 Game day hits different with a Miller light in your hand. From jaw-dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, my fantasy season's over already, but you know what makes that better? Miller time!

Speaker 10 It's the beer that's been there for every moment. 50 years of great taste, simple ingredients, and that iconic golden color you can spot from across the room.
And here's the kicker.

Speaker 10 It's just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. The original light beer since 1975 and still hitting different five decades later.

Speaker 10 So, whatever your game day looks like, remember Miller time is always a good time. Miller Light Grape Taste, 96 calories.
Go to MillerLite.com/slash stan to find delivery options near you.

Speaker 10 Or you can pick up Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller Time.
Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.