Local Hour: Stu Heights

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Speaker 6 This is the Dan Labatar Show with the Stu Gats Podcast.

Speaker 6 So I don't know if you're aware, but today is a big news day.

Speaker 6 This is a big news day because we had to respond here. We had to respond on the Dan Labatard show with Stu Gotts.

Speaker 5 Hello.

Speaker 6 Because on the New Heights podcast.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 6 Do I have the name right?

Speaker 19 Is that how they say it? I think so, yeah. That's the right inflection.

Speaker 20 New Heights.

Speaker 5 On the New Heights.

Speaker 4 Maybe they've been saying it wrong.

Speaker 6 On the New Heights podcast. Yes.
They have Taylor Swift on today. Tay Taylor.
That's a pretty good get. And so in turn, we had to respond as well.

Speaker 6 And that response comes in the form of one, Stu Gots home.

Speaker 5 Hello. Hello, Stugats.

Speaker 22 We got the guy whose name is on the show.

Speaker 5 Hello, Stugats.

Speaker 6 Good morning. Good to see you.

Speaker 21 It's a big get by you, Zaslow.

Speaker 6 That's what the producers call.

Speaker 5 That's a good pull.

Speaker 5 He felt like it today.

Speaker 5 I did.

Speaker 19 I came here.

Speaker 21 I woke up this morning and I said,

Speaker 21 I'm going to come in, do a show.

Speaker 21 And here I am.

Speaker 6 How do you feel? How are you doing? It's good to see you.

Speaker 21 I feel great. I do.

Speaker 21 It's good to see you. Thank you for allowing me on your program.

Speaker 19 I appreciate it.

Speaker 5 My program.

Speaker 21 Your hair looks fantastic.

Speaker 21 I was having a very interesting conversation with you right before we turned on the mics here.

Speaker 21 Yeah, we were talking about your kids at Zazzlo.

Speaker 6 Well, like, because I mean, Stu Gots and I haven't seen each other in a while. And so he does the whole, hey, you know, how are the obligatory? How are the kids?

Speaker 21 It was not obligatory. I was, I was asking you, I was asking you sincerely, how's the family doing?

Speaker 19 Turned into Poppy.

Speaker 5 How's the family? How's the family?

Speaker 21 But Zaszlo, I believe one of his kids has arrived at an age where the kid wants nothing to do with Zaszlo, nothing to do with the parents, doesn't want to be home.

Speaker 21 And if the kid doesn't get his way, he'll just take the keys of the car and drive away.

Speaker 6 So that happened last night for the first time in the Zaszlo mansion.

Speaker 23 You need to slap this kid upside the head.

Speaker 5 I mean, he's just running around doing whatever the hell he wants.

Speaker 23 Like, you claim that he stepped to you and you won that battle.

Speaker 24 Well, it's true.

Speaker 23 Yeah, it's true.

Speaker 25 He bought tickets to go to a UFC fight across state lines.

Speaker 23 He's just up and leaving the house when he doesn't like you. Like, what is going on in this Zaslow family manner?

Speaker 6 So, Stugat says to me, you know, are you in a place where he, you know, he doesn't want anything to do with you? And I said, you know, us. I said, yeah, pretty much.
But last night we had a blow-up.

Speaker 6 Like, last night was a first, all right?

Speaker 6 And that was him just up and leaving. Up and leaving in a huff.

Speaker 18 No subject? Is that too much information if we get the subject?

Speaker 6 Well, no.

Speaker 6 So what happened? So my older son is 16. All right.
He drives, got his own car, okay? And.

Speaker 21 It's your car, though. I mean.

Speaker 6 Well, I mean, I paid for it, but like, when it's your car household, he has his own car. Yes, technically, yes, I pay for it.
It's under my name. It's my car.

Speaker 20 It's a three-car household.

Speaker 23 but we have a three it's a three-car household he has his own car you call and you report that stolen like call the cops say someone stole a car from my send your kid to jail exactly right yeah and matter of fact i can track it i'm gonna tell you exactly where this car i don't know who it is one of the youths from around the block probably one of them youths same last name as me too

Speaker 18 the two the tuquat

Speaker 6 so so we he got home yesterday and he's in it he's in that teenage mood you know the mood where you know what i'm talking about i know the the mood.

Speaker 6 Where he just doesn't want to be around anyone and just sits in a dark room by himself, doom scrolling, all right? Just staring at the phone and just being

Speaker 6 just being miserable. Wow.

Speaker 16 It doesn't get much better around 40, kid.

Speaker 6 And so, and all my wife and I want to do, we just want to like, we just want to talk and be around you. And, and I don't know what to say.

Speaker 21 He's done talking. He's done talking to you.
He's done being around you.

Speaker 5 Right. He's done with all of it.

Speaker 6 And so then finally, one of us shouted at him. If this is what you're going to be like, then we don't want you here.
Okay. And so, of course, what's that?

Speaker 5 Oh, you don't want me here?

Speaker 4 I'm leaving.

Speaker 6 And like, that's exactly what happened.

Speaker 5 He got you, right? Yeah, right, right.

Speaker 4 He showed us.

Speaker 6 He took us. He's like, where are you going?

Speaker 5 He goes, well, you don't want me. I'm leaving.

Speaker 6 And he up and left. And so we had this.
And then my wife is like, she's all hysterical now. And

Speaker 6 Jonathan,

Speaker 6 what should we do?

Speaker 5 She talks like you.

Speaker 26 Did you tell?

Speaker 17 It's odd.

Speaker 6 Did you tell White Tamara?

Speaker 18 He's probably just driving around the block a few times. Where is he going to?

Speaker 26 As somebody who had,

Speaker 28 you're bringing me back right now to the, I'm fighting with my parents. I'm just leaving.
Don't have anywhere to go.

Speaker 16 He went to a fast food restaurant.

Speaker 25 Yeah, that's exactly where I went to, but it's the only place where you're allowed to go. I like the idea of like the Zaslow Manor.
Everyone has this. Mansion.
I'm sorry. Zaszlo Mansion.

Speaker 25 everyone has the exact same cadence.

Speaker 27 They all talk like Zach.

Speaker 30 Guess what?

Speaker 29 We're going to go to our in-laws.

Speaker 21 I'd leave that house too. I mean,

Speaker 6 you're a thousand percent right because about five minutes later, you know, we have the apps where you could check where they're going.

Speaker 21 Little Life360?

Speaker 6 Exactly.

Speaker 5 That's what we have. Great app, okay?

Speaker 6 And we check the app like five, ten minutes later, and we can clearly see he's in the drive-thru. A tough gorge.

Speaker 21 I knew it. Smoking pot, giving moss.

Speaker 32 Kids haven't changed.

Speaker 6 Right. If it was anything like me, you know, we're parked at the local fast food place and we're lighting up a bowl, okay?

Speaker 4 Well, that's what he's doing too, Zach.

Speaker 6 I don't think that that's what he was doing.

Speaker 27 Once again, it doesn't get much better at 40.

Speaker 6 But my wife's just like, what are we doing?

Speaker 5 I don't know.

Speaker 6 I don't have the handbook of how to deal with this.

Speaker 6 She kept asking me for answers. I don't have the answers.

Speaker 21 You're the head of the household. You're supposed to have the answers, man.
She looks to you to have the answers. Have an answer.

Speaker 5 Pick up an answer. Right.

Speaker 18 It's pretty obvious that when you've got the Life 360, you can pretty much monitor him. There's so much less to worry about.

Speaker 6 And if you let him think he's living.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 6 What were our parents doing? Because you're 100% right about that. Like when I left in a Huff or like Chris just said, he left in a huff.

Speaker 6 Although Chris's age, you probably had a cell phone. I didn't have a cell phone at that time.

Speaker 5 There was no like tracking people though, I don't believe. Right, right.

Speaker 6 But like when I left in Huff and certainly, Stu Gotz, when you left your house.

Speaker 21 No cell phones.

Speaker 6 No cell phone, definitely no internet, no apps, no Life 360, none of that bullshit. Like, how did our parents not freak out?

Speaker 18 In our age, and I believe Stu can confirm this with me, people in the streets knew you were a runaway because I took all my clothes and put it in one blanket and then put it on the end of a stick.

Speaker 5 People didn't actually do it.

Speaker 20 I didn't put that over my head.

Speaker 19 That was just me.

Speaker 5 I did it. No, that was just me.
That's how people knew you were a runaway.

Speaker 18 It's almost like hitchhiking without having to put your thumb up. Hey, I need a place to stay.

Speaker 6 I dreamed of doing that so many times as a kid.

Speaker 21 What an odd dream.

Speaker 21 Seriously.

Speaker 18 You got to have a strong stick.

Speaker 1 Just how, like, what stick do you use?

Speaker 6 Oh, you got to get a good branch.

Speaker 18 You got to go to the yard. You got to start.
Well, in my family, you got to start thinking about which one of these will my dad have used to whack me on the ass. I'm going to take that one away.

Speaker 18 Yeah, it's a whole nother topic.

Speaker 30 We can talk about it after.

Speaker 5 How long was your picking on off air?

Speaker 33 Well,

Speaker 6 I fell asleep.

Speaker 6 You were really worried.

Speaker 6 See, that's another thing. Chase that.

Speaker 20 Text them.

Speaker 18 Can you bring me back a Taco Bell Contrapsip, please?

Speaker 6 I'll get back to answering Billy's question there, but that's another thing.

Speaker 6 I don't understand the parents, probably our parents when we were young, how they stay up in the living room and they wait for you to get home.

Speaker 5 Right.

Speaker 5 I always fall asleep.

Speaker 21 My dad would tell me back in the old days with no cell phones, there was a parenting network. Like my parents knew where I was at all times.
I'm telling you.

Speaker 21 Like they had a network of parents and someone was in charge of tracking where all the kids were. So they knew, or at least they claimed that they knew.

Speaker 18 So I like the idea of Zaz sitting there waiting for his son, like having the arguments in his head and then just kind of falling asleep.

Speaker 5 And as soon as he hears something, he's like, oh, you'll never do this again. Pops up arguing.

Speaker 6 No, no, I don't fall asleep trying to wait up in the living room. I'm not even attempting to.
I go to bed.

Speaker 28 Like under a blanket.

Speaker 5 Yeah, like comfortable. So definitely.
Comfortably in bed.

Speaker 6 But I keep the ringer on my phone. I keep it on.
Okay, if he needs me.

Speaker 29 What about the text, though?

Speaker 6 I keep that on, too. Yeah.
Yeah. I keep.
Well, no, I keep it on for you. You could set on the app, you know, certain people.

Speaker 21 You could have the sound off. The sounds on for those people.
Yes.

Speaker 5 You're not getting the alerts for the hockey channel.

Speaker 6 No, no, no. That would keep me up all night.
So back to Billy's very important question.

Speaker 6 I woke up randomly at like three in the morning and I rolled over and I checked my phone to make sure my son came home. You know, so

Speaker 5 he came home around one.

Speaker 32 When did he leave?

Speaker 5 Maybe like nine? Wow. Wow.
Jesus.

Speaker 18 We're going to have to check his cell phone activity. Where was he exactly for those several hours?

Speaker 24 Do you have an alarm?

Speaker 5 Do I have an alarm? Yes.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 6 My phone has an alarm.

Speaker 5 It's like your house.

Speaker 6 Oh, oh, yes, of course.

Speaker 34 So like I upset him.

Speaker 24 Was the alarm on off?

Speaker 23 Because like I would turn it on, so when he gets home, set it off.

Speaker 35 Or like how handy are you?

Speaker 21 Then the cops come and take him to prison.

Speaker 5 Yeah, how handy are you?

Speaker 6 Well, I'm Jewish, so the answer to that is self-explanatory.

Speaker 36 But

Speaker 6 he has like the security features on his phone. You turn it off when you're coming home.

Speaker 23 I think what you do next time, do you feel like this is going to be something we go through again? I feel like he's going to up the answer.

Speaker 5 This is not what I said. That's what's happening again.

Speaker 23 This is what I think you do. Go to the Home Depot or the Lowe's or one of those, and you buy a new lock.

Speaker 23 And the next time this brat decides I'm going to go home and I'm going to show my parents, you literally change the lock on the door. And then see how long before he realizes, like, oh,

Speaker 23 I'm not welcome in this house anymore. Then he takes the rails, the trains.
He gets on a train and goes off somewhere else.

Speaker 23 With his bindle. You know that Dennis the Menace, the movie? Have you seen the movie Dennis the Menace? Yeah, sure.
Christopher Lloyd, where he was someone who was, you know, riding the rails.

Speaker 10 Looking under that bridge.

Speaker 23 That really took the dream that Izzy had of being a stowaway on a train away from me real quick. I was like, you know what?

Speaker 23 I do not want to just be hopping on random trains and running away because there's Christopher Lloyd's of the world out there doing that.

Speaker 1 That is a good movie to discourage running away.

Speaker 6 Yeah. Do you think Dennis Menace holds up these days?

Speaker 19 I haven't seen it in a while. Probably not.

Speaker 28 Walter Mathows?

Speaker 21 He doesn't.

Speaker 28 I believe he was the grumpy guy, right?

Speaker 14 You know there's a difference between

Speaker 5 mansion and a manor?

Speaker 5 Yeah, man.

Speaker 37 I didn't know what the difference was.

Speaker 6 A mansion has opulence.

Speaker 23 Yeah, a manor has multiple mansions on it.

Speaker 31 Yeah, it's like the main house.

Speaker 23 You want a manor, not a mansion.

Speaker 21 You do want a manor.

Speaker 5 Already been through this.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 6 I'm a mansion kind of guy.

Speaker 38 Standalone home.

Speaker 14 It's a mansion, but a standalone mansion home.

Speaker 5 That's for rich.

Speaker 19 I want my opulence, dog.

Speaker 16 But you have opulence with a manor, too.

Speaker 41 You also have more land.

Speaker 6 All right, I'm not going to, you know, I'm not going to litigate this with you.

Speaker 21 I'm more impressed if I'm pulling up to a manor than I am if I'm pulling up to a manor. As you should be.

Speaker 30 It's a compound.

Speaker 23 Have you talked to this kid again since last night? Like when you woke up, did you see him?

Speaker 6 No, he's a teenager. There's no way he was awake when I left the house.

Speaker 26 I don't know. It's cool.

Speaker 6 No, no, they're in private school.

Speaker 19 They haven't started yet. Question.

Speaker 34 You said that you were less

Speaker 18 upset than White Tamara, but yet you were the one on the couch. Was she comfortably sleeping in the middle of the morning?

Speaker 5 No, yeah, I wasn't on the couch.

Speaker 4 We both went to sleep.

Speaker 6 We like, we, we neither of you care. We don't stay up like that.
Well, why do I need to stay up? Why do I need to stay up and stare? Like I said, I got features on my phone, man.

Speaker 18 When your son comes home and nobody's waiting for him, he's like, They never gave a shit about me to begin with, right?

Speaker 6 Well, we already told him, you know, if this is your attitude, we don't want you here.

Speaker 5 Like, we already established who said get out, like, here or your wife?

Speaker 6 Uh, my wife, wow, yeah,

Speaker 6 but then she was the most upset when he finally did leave.

Speaker 21 But Izzy is right when your kid runs away and then comes home, right? You have to be, someone needs to be standing at the door waiting for the kid. It's intimidating.
You need to do it.

Speaker 21 I mean, you used to do that.

Speaker 18 Like, no, sitcom music in the background. Just like, oh, okay, now, now we know it's the time to discuss this and then settle our situation.
And then we both go to bed calmly.

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Speaker 24 The libertard.

Speaker 21 I had Rachel and Emma both home, and I was in a fight with Rachel. And I said, if you roll your eyes one more time, there's going to be a problem.

Speaker 5 A big problem.

Speaker 21 And she said, really?

Speaker 17 what are you going to do stugats oh god damn i mean that's where i didn't have an answer this is the dan lebatar show with the stugats

Speaker 21 i was a good parent saslo my kids never ran away you were

Speaker 21 yeah Well, I mean, I'm not parenting anymore.

Speaker 5 They're adults. I mean, I'm done.

Speaker 19 It's over.

Speaker 5 Yeah, it's over.

Speaker 19 I did it.

Speaker 23 I think, and you're probably not going to like this answer.

Speaker 23 You got to give up on this kid. This kid's a lost cause and just focus on the other ones.
Move on. Yeah, we don't have the same issue with number two.

Speaker 6 Just drive into like a farm and open the door and say kids free.

Speaker 23 No, no, it is what it is. He's 16, you said.
I mean,

Speaker 23 he'll be around for two more years.

Speaker 15 Stop talking to him.

Speaker 24 Exactly right. Yeah.

Speaker 5 I mean, you just, okay, we did what we can.

Speaker 23 Sorry, lost cause. We're going to focus on your brother now.
We love him more than you. Finished product.

Speaker 16 He's like, bam, out of bio.

Speaker 25 You know what he is. Right.

Speaker 6 So, how do I handle it when I get home today?

Speaker 28 Start calling him a Drees.

Speaker 23 I mean, you're assuming that when you get home, the lock's not going to be changed. It sounds like this kid runs the household, honestly.
He does whatever he wants.

Speaker 18 I think when you get home, you basically just start questioning every time he does something. He goes to the freezer for an uncrustable.

Speaker 6 Just like, hey, hey, if you're not living here, those aren't yours.

Speaker 18 If he goes to like fine and go wash his hands, they're like, what are you talking about?

Speaker 5 People who don't have houses don't have running water.

Speaker 19 That's my water.

Speaker 18 He just started doing that over and over again. He's like, fine, Dad, I get it.

Speaker 6 So you want me to ride him? Like, I'm gonna keep this going.

Speaker 23 Yes, it seems like it'll probably make things worse, but you got to. We've already given up on him.

Speaker 31 Make him pay rent.

Speaker 21 I'm with Billy. Ignore him, move on.

Speaker 28 Buy something really cool for your other son. Just show him that this is what happens when you behave.

Speaker 23 Oh, take your other son to the UFC fight he wanted to go to.

Speaker 6 Well, I did take my other son to SummerSlam last week and take the older one.

Speaker 5 That's the younger one.

Speaker 21 That's because the older one didn't want to go, though.

Speaker 19 Yeah, that's fair.

Speaker 4 The older one's not really interested.

Speaker 5 He didn't want to go with you.

Speaker 18 You know what you should do? Say in the Zaslow mansion, no more Arab fighters.

Speaker 6 You know what Stu Gots did?

Speaker 18 Put it on the door in front so everybody knows when they come in.

Speaker 5 We're starting a whole Arab war.

Speaker 28 There is to the audience just joining us. There is context.
Yes.

Speaker 29 His son loves the Arab fighters.

Speaker 5 Yeah, his son's an apostle.

Speaker 6 So Stu Gotz did suggest before as well, have you thought about grounding him?

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 6 And then I said, like, I don't know, maybe this is like a new generation type of thing. I told him, like, we've never been a grounding family.

Speaker 4 Like, I don't think we've ever actually grounded him.

Speaker 18 There's your problem. Well, it's very obvious.

Speaker 6 I mean, well, Stugats,

Speaker 5 did you ground your daughter?

Speaker 21 I was grounded. I never grounded my daughters.
So, again, we were good parents. We had no reason to grounded.

Speaker 6 I don't know why you keep saying we were good parents.

Speaker 21 I mean, my kids aren't taking the keys and leaving a conversation and coming back at 1 a.m. Not happening.

Speaker 6 But you never grounded them.

Speaker 16 Never grounded them. Don't you have one child on the other side of the planet right now?

Speaker 21 Australia. She's back.
She was at Bondi Beach, studying for a weekend. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Studying for a weekend? It wasn't a week.

Speaker 21 I'm sorry, semester.

Speaker 21 Thank you. She actually studied for what, you know, for a weekend, for two days.
The rest of the time, she partying.

Speaker 19 Ah, yeah.

Speaker 48 Several months. Gotcha.
Gotcha.

Speaker 21 A partying, not studying.

Speaker 18 Stugats' parental strategy is out of sight, out of mind. Send him away.

Speaker 6 Like, Chris, were you ever grounded growing up?

Speaker 28 I remember my mom being very mad at me a lot, but I don't remember actually.

Speaker 5 Very mad at me a lot. But never grounded.

Speaker 1 I can remember, I can picture my mom being upset with me, but there was never like, you're grounded for two weeks.

Speaker 6 Oh, yeah, I'm not asking, like, did you ever, like, were you never in short?

Speaker 5 I never, that's what I mean.

Speaker 28 Like, I don't, no, to answer your question, no, I can't remember getting specifically grounded.

Speaker 18 I can't picture Greg Cody being a hard ass.

Speaker 48 Oh, no, my mom was the hard ass.

Speaker 21 Are we still grounding kids? Is that right now for me?

Speaker 28 It's the tablet.

Speaker 37 If you do something,

Speaker 28 you have no, you can just go in your room and you can color.

Speaker 18 I think I already established with me it was a stick or belt to the ass.

Speaker 28 Coloring is a punishment these days.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you actually just like make them do things with other human beings.

Speaker 35 You can't. And that's the punishment.

Speaker 28 No electronics. You need to be a normal.

Speaker 1 You have to go outside and play with other kids.

Speaker 28 I'm serious, though. That is the big punishment these days.

Speaker 35 If I say you're going to lose your tablet, she will do whatever I say.

Speaker 18 I think we're talking about a different age group here, though.

Speaker 6 This is what I'm dealing with.

Speaker 21 Yeah, but he's 16 and Zazzlo's not going to take his phone or his computer.

Speaker 21 The kid doesn't care if he does.

Speaker 5 Quite a lot.

Speaker 6 Oh, well, that's a great example because one of the things that we did last night was because

Speaker 6 we didn't love his attitude, my wife turned off the features on his phone.

Speaker 6 She can control that because of the family sharing or whatever. And okay, that obviously expedited the whole him, I'm leaving situation.

Speaker 6 And then what happened was he left, and I got to check the Light360 because I want to see where he is. But guess what? It's off because she turned off the features.

Speaker 6 So then I got to tell my wife, you got to turn the features back on so I can keep track of him.

Speaker 31 You can't just turn on the one individual feature.

Speaker 6 Look, you're asking me questions I don't have all the answers to. I'm just telling you what I know.

Speaker 18 Can you text your son and ask him what particular particular feature got him so heated that he didn't have anymore that he was willing to move away from his parents?

Speaker 24 Why don't we get him on? Let's go.

Speaker 23 Instead of you doing this, just bring your kid on and we'll do like a family therapy here.

Speaker 6 I think it's the Snapchat. That's the thing that the teenagers are like in love with these days.

Speaker 23 What happened with Snapchat?

Speaker 34 Still cooking.

Speaker 27 Yeah, younger people still like it.

Speaker 23 But did it like go out of style and then come back with younger people?

Speaker 23 I feel like Snapchat started and we like moved away from it, but it's still a thing with younger people.

Speaker 6 I think that's how the teenagers text. I don't think they use the actual texting on the phone.
I think they all text. They message the Snapchat.

Speaker 5 That's how they say nudes.

Speaker 23 Like, if someone cares so much what you're thinking that you need to send it in like disappearing Snapchat, no one gives a shit about your high school drama, losers.

Speaker 6 Get a life. I don't know, man.

Speaker 6 Anyway, that's what I got going on. Good to see you, Stugats.

Speaker 21 Good to see you, Zazzlo. I'm glad the family stuff's going well.

Speaker 28 Well, it didn't help you at all.

Speaker 23 You still don't have a strategy for what you got to do.

Speaker 5 I'll have an update tomorrow.

Speaker 6 Like, I'm here all day.

Speaker 23 But what are you going to do? You know what you're going to do?

Speaker 6 No, I have some time.

Speaker 6 I just surveyed the room. You guys were not much help, and I got to figure out what to do now.

Speaker 21 You got to figure it out on your own, man. I mean.
Do you think your kid is expecting some sort of conversation when you get home today?

Speaker 6 Well, I think he's probably praying there's not.

Speaker 21 Right, but he thinks there probably is, right?

Speaker 5 I don't know.

Speaker 6 Because he's going to avoid you the entire day.

Speaker 5 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 6 Like, I'm going to get home, and he's going to be in the exact same position he was in yesterday afternoon when we got mad at him. That's for sure.

Speaker 5 Right.

Speaker 21 Either that or he'll be smoking pot in an alley somewhere.

Speaker 4 I mean, what's today?

Speaker 23 He just, he's home? Like he's just home all day?

Speaker 6 Yeah, he's not working.

Speaker 19 Until Zaslow gets home.

Speaker 5 Is he listening to this?

Speaker 6 No, no.

Speaker 6 Okay, so that's another thing. Like, you think that he'd be listening? No, these, my kids don't care.
They don't care that I'm on the radio or podcast or Peacock.

Speaker 21 The younger one cares?

Speaker 5 No, not really.

Speaker 6 They don't think it's a big deal.

Speaker 18 It's not a big deal to them because you've done it your whole life, right? You've been on the radio. You've been on TV.

Speaker 26 It's so not impressive to me. It's not a dad's job.

Speaker 6 Yeah, it's so not. Oh, they like it when we're sitting ringside at SummerSlam, but otherwise, it's not a benefit to them, right?

Speaker 5 Right.

Speaker 6 It's not impressive to them.

Speaker 37 Yeah, Stu, do your daughters, it doesn't really matter to them that you were on ESPN on the air because it's all they know.

Speaker 21 It's all they know. At the time, the first

Speaker 21 few times we were at ESPN, it was a big deal to them because it was such a big deal to me.

Speaker 21 But after that, after a couple of weeks, it was just, it became, became normal to them, you know? So, not impressed. It's hard to impress your kids, man.

Speaker 5 God, kids, they humble you.

Speaker 26 They kind of suck.

Speaker 18 So, Taylor Swift was really on that podcast, huh?

Speaker 25 Well, I think she's going to be on tonight, or it's tomorrow.

Speaker 6 Wednesday, I thought it said.

Speaker 16 Tomorrow.

Speaker 27 Jason's got a new coat.

Speaker 39 No, and I'm not talking about a jacket.

Speaker 6 So, we countered, though, I think, in a very big way. Like, it's quite possible that Kelsey brothers, like, this Dan Lebanzo show and Stu Gotts, they're climbing too far up the chart.

Speaker 34 They've been looking at the charts.

Speaker 28 They're like, we need something.

Speaker 5 Call Taylor in.

Speaker 6 And we called in the reserves and we brought in Stu Gotz.

Speaker 28 They brought in a lefty hitter.

Speaker 49 We're bringing in our lefty panel.

Speaker 30 Stu, you're friendly with Travis a little bit.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 50 Is this going to be his last season?

Speaker 21 Feels that way, no? He's not going to tell me.

Speaker 30 I mean, I'm just going to act like he would, though.

Speaker 40 Yeah, I'm asking you as someone that knows him better than anyone else in the room.

Speaker 21 I don't think it's going to be his last season. I don't.

Speaker 28 This is where you'd be like, I talked to him last week. He's not sure.

Speaker 21 You know, I talked to him in Tahoe.

Speaker 5 Yeah, you're taking. You pose for a photo.

Speaker 21 Yeah, but you know how Tahoe goes, Mike. Like, you'll say anything.
You're in a good mood. The weather's beautiful.
You're about to play golf.

Speaker 21 I got the sense he was going to play five more years when I talked to him.

Speaker 27 I know how it goes for you.

Speaker 21 But then I also realize we're in Tahoe and people just say stuff.

Speaker 5 Yeah, it's all just chit-chat.

Speaker 21 Yeah, so five more years.

Speaker 6 I don't expect a whole lot out of him this year, if we're being serious for a moment. Like, I subscribe to the theory of once you start thinking about the retiring, I feel like you.
You've retired?

Speaker 6 Yeah, I feel like you're like, that's probably the time. Like, remember, this was a conversation at the end of the Super Bowl last year.
This was a real thing that he might retire.

Speaker 6 He decided, no, I'm still going to play. And it's also coming off, obviously, like his least productive year, I think, since his rookie season.

Speaker 6 I think once you start thinking that way, I think you're kind of dumb.

Speaker 39 He has big-time Hollywood aspirations, too, taking a ton of meetings around town.

Speaker 46 Everyone knows it.

Speaker 19 He was good in Happy Gilmore.

Speaker 21 He was very good.

Speaker 4 I liked him.

Speaker 45 I got to tell you, the window for me to watch this movie is probably closed. There are too many people saying that it's really, really bad.

Speaker 21 Not worth it. He was good, though.
I want to see the camera.

Speaker 6 What do you mean, not worth it? Like, he doesn't have an hour and a half in his life. It's not worth the hour and a half.

Speaker 39 I genuinely, like, if I'm going to spend an hour and a half of my life on a movie, I want it to be like one that's not bad. I started watching that Jurassic Park, the new one.

Speaker 4 I liked it.

Speaker 6 It's good, right?

Speaker 27 I fell asleep twice.

Speaker 5 Same, you know.

Speaker 18 Stu, when you were in Tahoe talking to Travis Kelsey, are you sure it wasn't Jonas Valentunis?

Speaker 21 It could have been.

Speaker 28 This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Man, these days are getting way too short.
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Speaker 49 Folks, fuel your game day with the unbeatable crunch of Hampton Farms, the official peanut of bowl season. Perfect for sharing with friends, tailgating outside the stadium, or cheering from the couch.

Speaker 49 Grab a bag from the produce aisle of your local grocery store and savor the game one peanut at a time. Let's get nutty.

Speaker 24 Don Lebatard.

Speaker 51 Mike Ryan's in there, and he's the one with a baby. He's the one who's got to like worry about what the future is.
And Mike Ryan bet on DraftKings because Mike Ryan bet on us.

Speaker 51 This is the bet you're afraid of doubling down on.

Speaker 48 Putting up a billboard in Edmonton.

Speaker 44 Stugats.

Speaker 48 I care more about Matthew Kachuck than I do my daughter.

Speaker 17 This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats.

Speaker 45 Well, if you had your alerts on the hockey chats as

Speaker 33 while your son ran away from home, we're buzzing a little bit.

Speaker 45 Matthew Kachuck is playing the long con.

Speaker 6 So I saw this, Stew Gotts. I saw this yesterday.
I don't know if you did. Matthew Kachuk plays the Panthers.

Speaker 6 Panthers back-to-back standing up champs.

Speaker 33 I don't know if you know that.

Speaker 6 And Matthew Kachuck is, he had hernia

Speaker 6 and torn adductor.

Speaker 6 Those are very serious injuries. Played through it like a champ.
Yeah. That's a winner right there.

Speaker 20 Adductor or adductor.

Speaker 6 Whatever I said is what it is.

Speaker 18 You're a doctor.

Speaker 21 I'm sorry. Say it again, though.
I didn't hear it.

Speaker 37 He tore that during the fight.

Speaker 6 Torn adductor.

Speaker 5 Adductor.

Speaker 11 We all knew that he got injured at the Four Nations. What we didn't know is that he tore his adductor.

Speaker 15 That was for you, Zed. That was.

Speaker 27 Adductor.

Speaker 27 That he tore it in the fight.

Speaker 11 He dropped gloves in the first few seconds of that game against Canada in Montreal.

Speaker 30 And then he played through

Speaker 16 peaks and valleys when it came to his playoff performance, but had a good Stanley Cup, especially as that series got more.

Speaker 6 It felt like he got healthier throughout the playoffs. Like, he obviously started, remember the first postseason game against Tampa, he had the two goals, like, oh my God, Chucky, I love you so much.

Speaker 6 And then he was pretty quiet for like two rounds. But then Eastern finals and especially at Stanley Cup final, he was awesome again.

Speaker 27 He tore that adductor off the bone.

Speaker 31 It's something that's reportedly going to need surgery.

Speaker 14 He's playing the long con right now because he still has not gotten the surgery.

Speaker 6 Right. So he spoke with ESPN's Greg Waschinski yesterday where he's still undecided, Stugatz, what he's going to do if he's going to have the surgery.

Speaker 6 If he has the surgery, it's going to cost him between two and three months. So like if he had the surgery now,

Speaker 6 let's say three months, we're talking being out till maybe the beginning of December. I mean, that's a con.

Speaker 21 Yeah, but that's it. Well, it's a long con because he's going to be out for the entire regular season, just play towards the end of the regular season, into the postseason.

Speaker 21 Do the Panthers really need him during the regular season?

Speaker 27 Well, I mean, they showed that they could play well without him towards the tail end of the season.

Speaker 14 After the Four Nations, we didn't see him again to the playoffs, but here's why it's a long con.

Speaker 16 You hold out from the surgery because of that recovery time.

Speaker 40 Even though the NHL is going to eventually do away with a long-term IRA.

Speaker 6 Pay attention here, Sue Guys. This is what's very important.

Speaker 31 They're going to do away with a long-term IR.

Speaker 16 That doesn't take into effect this season.

Speaker 29 So Florida is going to manipulate the rules in their favor.

Speaker 16 Have them have surgery as close to the start of the season as you can, and you get to extend that recovery time, and you get to make evaluations on your roster.

Speaker 50 It's because of this that you haven't traded someone like Evan Rodriguez because if Matthew Kachuck is on this active roster, the Florida Panthers are over the salary cap.

Speaker 6 By like three some odd million dollars, which in hockey is actually a lot.

Speaker 14 So the question would be like, well, if you're going to end up trading Evan Rodriguez, why not trade him, you know, at the start of the season if you still need to make this move with Matthew Kachuck?

Speaker 33 Here's why you don't do that move.

Speaker 16 Here's why it benefits the Florida Panthers for Matthew Kachuck to put this surgery off.

Speaker 33 Someone else can get hurt.

Speaker 16 It's hockey, very physical sport, as we know.

Speaker 31 And you also have essentially three and a half months of data points that you can take into account and see, is it going to be Evan Rodriguez?

Speaker 14 Is it going to be somebody else

Speaker 33 whose form is not up to snuff here?

Speaker 16 We can evaluate the season as it goes on.

Speaker 33 So Florida's doing the smart thing here.

Speaker 16 And Matthew Kachuk, even though it seems counterintuitive, is wise in putting off this surgery as long as possible so Florida has the most flexibility.

Speaker 18 And before people start calling it the Kachuk rule after next year and saying, oh, the Panthers, those assholes, they did it. Can you tell them who did it against us the last few years?

Speaker 6 Kucharov, Stone.

Speaker 29 Yeah, the Vegas.

Speaker 33 Yeah, Vegas did it a ton.

Speaker 27 Look, Florida,

Speaker 27 it's fair.

Speaker 16 I complained about those teams

Speaker 6 using fair is the thing that's within the rules.

Speaker 5 It's fair.

Speaker 42 I didn't like it.

Speaker 16 We went into a Stanley Cup against a very loaded Vegas Golden Knight team.

Speaker 31 We were not using the long-term IR.

Speaker 32 They were. They were loaded.

Speaker 25 They were super deep because they used this.

Speaker 40 Tampa, we all know what happened there when they eliminated Florida.

Speaker 6 We all know what what happened last couple years, took that ass.

Speaker 16 Florida got to say we won a Stanley Cup without using this rule last year. I mean, two years ago.

Speaker 42 Last year, they used it, and we're going to remain consistent over here.

Speaker 27 I don't like it when teams abuse this loophole, but it's going to be a loophole, and Florida's already gone through that threshold.

Speaker 25 So they're going to abuse it as long as they can now.

Speaker 18 If you ain't cheating, you ain't trying.

Speaker 21 You don't like it when it's done to you, but if you're doing it, you're fine.

Speaker 5 I'm not fine.

Speaker 40 I'm going to be consistent.

Speaker 5 I'm with you, by the way.

Speaker 42 I don't like it.

Speaker 16 And if other teams want to criticize, they can criticize Florida. I think the dirty stuff is a little played out, but they can criticize Florida for abusing long-term IR.

Speaker 27 They can criticize Aaron Ekblad for the performance-enhancing drugs.

Speaker 41 Those things are fair game.

Speaker 16 And Florida did kind of, for the first time, in my opinion, really leaned into the black hat that the rest of the league, their fans and the media, put on them years ago where I thought it was unfair before.

Speaker 15 Now it's justified.

Speaker 6 So you think that the reason that he hasn't had the surgery, because the first thing that comes to mind for me is

Speaker 6 the season ended. You won the Stanley Cup in the middle of June.
That was two months ago. Why haven't we had the surgery yet? Like, I'd like you to be healthy and ready for the start of the season.

Speaker 21 He played golf in Lake Tahoe, too. Normally, those are things fans get mad at.

Speaker 5 Right. Like, you're delaying surgery to play golf.

Speaker 21 Get ready for next season.

Speaker 6 Like, that was a Shaq move all the time. Remember, Shaq,

Speaker 6 he had the surgery on his big toe. Like, the day before training camp.

Speaker 5 So I was like, well, the whole summer, you know?

Speaker 6 So that's the first thing that came to mind for me is I wish you would have done it already.

Speaker 6 You'd be almost completely recovered, but you're saying you think this is actually a coordinated effort with the team.

Speaker 16 Yes, Florida has capable wingers that come in.

Speaker 31 Look, Matthew Kachuk, despite his gritty reputation, and that's well learned, defensively, he's not like the rest of the forwards on the Florida Panthers.

Speaker 46 He's one of the slowest players in the league.

Speaker 11 So if you put in an offensive-minded winger like Boquist or Senseikiewicz, they're going to produce.

Speaker 32 They've proven whether it's on line two, whether it's on line three, they're going to go in there.

Speaker 16 If If they get the ice time, they put up points because they're surrounded by good players.

Speaker 16 Normally, it would sound counterintuitive to start a season without one of your best players in Matthew Kachuck.

Speaker 6 Without the guy who changed the entire trajectory of your franchisees.

Speaker 16 It benefits them for this point in their franchise timeline for him to get this surgery later so they can keep this core together for even if it's just a few more months.

Speaker 21 How do you envision that going down, that conversation? Are the Panthers telling Matthew Kachuck, hey, delay it. Hey, we can't get you a doctor till mid-August?

Speaker 16 This was plotted out the second second he got hurt.

Speaker 6 Well, but like, what if Kachuck said to them, yeah, like, I hear what you're saying, but I really like playing hockey.

Speaker 5 Right.

Speaker 16 He's within his rights to do that, but I think he's a team player.

Speaker 30 He's changed the franchise.

Speaker 36 This is all coordinated with Kachuck, his reps, and Florida won.

Speaker 8 And look, it was very important to Matthew Kachuck for us to re-sign the guys that we did.

Speaker 32 That math does not math.

Speaker 16 If Matthew Ka-Chuck is on the roster day one, you're going to have to say goodbye. You're going to have to kick some guys out of the group chat.

Speaker 25 And this is a tight group of guys, and they don't seem ready to kick anybody out of the group chat right now.

Speaker 18 Do you know who this was not coordinated with?

Speaker 5 Probably.

Speaker 18 The folks at EA Sports.

Speaker 22 Their cover athletes going to be out all year long.

Speaker 5 Ooh, probably not.

Speaker 27 They're already cursed with a cover athlete.

Speaker 6 So the part that, I don't want to say this part bothers me because,

Speaker 6 like, that team's not going to be able to do anything to bother me with the joy they've given me these last few years.

Speaker 6 But I don't, so there is something to be said for, hey, it's most important to have him healthy for the playoffs.

Speaker 6 And maybe if he misses the first two, maybe three months of the season, he'll not only be healthy, but he will be somewhat rested, you know, by the time the playoffs roll around.

Speaker 6 And that's obviously what's most important because we're trying to win a Stanley Cup. And all of that makes sense.

Speaker 6 But I also don't want to become the team that only cares about the destination because the journey to me is extremely enjoyable still. Like, I don't want to

Speaker 6 be the playoffs. I want the whole season to matter.

Speaker 21 But the journey is hard, Zazzlo, and they've done done it two years in a row and they played more hockey games than they were.

Speaker 5 Well, we can essentially say three.

Speaker 22 They've been there three years.

Speaker 21 And they've been there three years in a row. So why not take some shortcuts when you can? And this is a shortcut.
And good for Kachuck. The Panthers will be fine without him during the regular season.

Speaker 21 And even if they aren't, if they go in as a four-seed or a five-seed like they did this year, they're still going to be the favorites probably as long as Kachuk is healthy to win the cop.

Speaker 16 They weren't the favorites entering last season because they got hurt.

Speaker 29 Matthew Kachuk was out and people were doubting.

Speaker 16 I think by the time Puck Drop started on the first playoff game, Carolina was a favorite out east.

Speaker 37 I don't know if they're the favorite right now.

Speaker 39 We can check the odds on DraftKings, but...

Speaker 6 I don't think they are. I think they're second.

Speaker 41 You have to keep in mind, they play in a very difficult division.

Speaker 16 This is one of the toughest divisions

Speaker 16 in hockey, if not the most difficult division in hockey.

Speaker 11 It's very within the realm of possibility that without Matthew Kachuk, they don't finish top three in a division in which teams get a massive boatload of points compared to some of the other divisions.

Speaker 16 It's why Carolina baked into their team plans is we have a much much weaker division. If we just improve on this core, we have a path to the Eastern Conference Finals.

Speaker 10 And then they get tricked into thinking they're a lot better than they actually are.

Speaker 39 Florida can have a tougher path, but luckily, this franchise has shown you in back-to-back years, they can do it with home ice, and they can do it without ever having home ice.

Speaker 18 My biggest question on the team is: how long do we get this version of Bob? Because when that starts to slide, then I don't know what it looks like.

Speaker 6 I mean, there's no real reason to believe that it's dropping off yet.

Speaker 21 You know, why would you think that?

Speaker 21 It does take a while.

Speaker 5 How old is he?

Speaker 6 He's 37, I think.

Speaker 45 I guess what you hang your hat on is this postseason run was the best version of Bob throughout their two previous.

Speaker 6 He started a little slow, and then after the start, it was unbelievable.

Speaker 5 It's kind of nuts.

Speaker 48 Bob's part in this whole run here.

Speaker 14 Florida made the playoffs that first year as an eighth seed when they made it to the Stanley Cup final only to eventually lose to Vegas.

Speaker 35 He was benched. Yep.

Speaker 6 Alex Lyon. He was not the starter at the beginning of the postseason.

Speaker 29 Alex Lyon got

Speaker 5 a day two days ago.

Speaker 31 Got Florida into the playoffs, and Bob had to reclaim his job

Speaker 46 during that postseason.

Speaker 6 Well, they went down three games to, or I think they were down 2-1 at the time, and then they went to Bubarovsky.

Speaker 4 And of course, they came back and they beat Bob.

Speaker 15 It's kind of nuts considering where we are here. He's certainly a Hall of Famer, and he's going to have his jersey retired by this franchise.

Speaker 31 They make that initial run.

Speaker 16 They get proof of concept because they benched him.

Speaker 6 Jeremy's also here today. Hello, Jeremy.
Hey, Zaz. Jeremy, you were out yesterday.

Speaker 6 Did you hear anything that you were not into yesterday, you had a problem with that you want to get your thoughts in on?

Speaker 1 Yeah, some things that I had an issue with, but other things that I thought were really great. So I do have a top five topics from yesterday to respond to.

Speaker 5 So OLI,

Speaker 1 we sounded really, really old.

Speaker 1 Posting to Facebook?

Speaker 5 Well, I mean, that's...

Speaker 21 What's wrong with that?

Speaker 27 It was a Greg Cody Monday.

Speaker 5 Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 Facebook's too young for Greg Cody, but just, you know, Facebook's not the place for those first day of school photos anymore.

Speaker 15 Just call it Facebook.

Speaker 1 Asking Greg if he would date Chris.

Speaker 4 We acted like... That was not the question.

Speaker 18 It was more, is he your tie?

Speaker 1 Hey, actually, I'm not criticizing it. I'm saying it's actually a pretty normal question.
In fact, the President of the United States has said he would date his daughter if it wasn't his daughter.

Speaker 5 So moving on, another question.

Speaker 5 What was the conversation you guys had about deli meat?

Speaker 1 Ah, boar's head. Really, really great discussion.
You got to go up to the deli counter, ask for thinly sliced.

Speaker 1 That gets exactly where you guys want it to be between like that shredded deli meat and way too thick from just buying the pre-packaged one. Number five, criticisms of Greg.

Speaker 1 10 minutes apart, you guys got mad at Greg for not lying about a story with Tim Bowens and making up details, and then 10 minutes later got mad at him for making up a story with details about umpiring.

Speaker 1 Be consistent, guys. Come on, if you're going to criticize Greg, do the things that actually should be criticized.

Speaker 11 Fallacy and falsehoods.

Speaker 48 Number four.

Speaker 42 That's why we got mad at Greg.

Speaker 40 He didn't give us anything on the Tim Bowens story.

Speaker 15 He was so annoying yesterday.

Speaker 34 Number four.

Speaker 1 The audience's favorite topics.

Speaker 1 Really glad we talked about WWE and TV rights again. Fair.
Really glad we did that one.

Speaker 34 Number three, Ethan.

Speaker 5 That was mad.

Speaker 6 I cannot believe you.

Speaker 44 Jeremy, on that one? You're right.

Speaker 1 I can't believe you guys fell for the ruse of him caring about his dog. All he wanted was to be on this show.

Speaker 42 You know how I know that?

Speaker 1 I've been him before.

Speaker 17 Number two.

Speaker 33 He probably tore the ACL himself.

Speaker 16 I actually had that hypothetical question

Speaker 34 before the show today.

Speaker 23 I asked the room while you were out. I said, if Ethan knew he was going to speak so much on air, do you think he would have injured his dog sooner? 100%.

Speaker 1 100%. Number two, you guys didn't know there were dildos at CVS?

Speaker 25 No, cool.

Speaker 18 Nobody knows. He's got them toes.

Speaker 5 Yeah, man. You knew?

Speaker 5 Nice. Oh, my God, he knows.
Who doesn't?

Speaker 1 Number one, Juju's best idea.

Speaker 1 You guys totally blew past this one in the post-game show. The idea of giving...

Speaker 1 winners of a championship not just the big gaudy championship ring that they could leave in their home on display but but essentially a wedding band that's engraved with the team name and the year in which they win you could even engrave it maybe with the gem that's that's the color of the team i thought that was an unbelievable idea and you guys just blew right past it like the ronaldo wedding salute to juju we could just have that one toned down

Speaker 18 jesus i'm so glad we went to this

Speaker 35 that is a wedding ring

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