Hour 1: Best Limited Fake (feat. Jessica Smetana)

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Speaker 11 This is the Dan Labatar Show with the Stu Gats Podcast.

Speaker 12 I don't know how much Jessica, how often she hears I've missed your voice, but hearing her at the end of Dismissal sneak in there with some genuine rage about Halloween not being spooky enough brought me great joy and brought a challenger to what appears to be Billy's category now of dismissal because of how Billy owned the dismissal.

Speaker 12 Jessica, did you hear any of that?

Speaker 13 I was listening to it, and my question is, was I okay?

Speaker 12 You were angry. You were angry at the time.
It was Miami traffic. It was understandable because it wasn't also spooky hostility.

Speaker 3 Well, the answer is no, you lived in Miami.

Speaker 13 It doesn't seem like I was doing well last fall.

Speaker 12 Yeah, and the Billy, though, dismissal category,

Speaker 12 did you remember that kind of hostility? Because Billy doesn't seem, as it regards Europe, like he's doing very well.

Speaker 4 Jess, was that after the Northern Illinois game? It might have been Northern Illinois week.

Speaker 13 Yeah, but but I don't think that would have had anything to do with it. I think it was more so because Miami's not spooky.

Speaker 13 Actually, yeah, now that I think about it, oh, Willow just kicked my computer. Did you see that? That was so cute.

Speaker 13 Oh, my God. She's just stretching out on the bed.

Speaker 13 No, I just think it's because Miami wasn't spooky and it sucked. And I guess after four years, I just, you know, really all hit me.

Speaker 12 Is the Miami football team spooky this weekend to you as a Notre Dame fan?

Speaker 13 Spooky? No. I think they're really good, though.
I think they have a real shot at winning their opening game.

Speaker 13 So I would say, as I did on the Kane's Insight Hurricade show yesterday, why didn't you just call it like Hurricane? Like, why did you make it Hurricade?

Speaker 13 I think it's going to be a good game. Okay.
Yeah, I will not do that, actually.

Speaker 13 I'm good. I did love Billy's Dismissal of Europe.
That was top tier. I think that's what I would vote for, other than myself, of course.

Speaker 3 Do you hate Europe as well? Wow.

Speaker 6 Well, my great-grandparents certainly did.

Speaker 15 Well,

Speaker 3 I'm just confused why everyone's bringing up dead relatives today, honestly.

Speaker 4 It was disarming.

Speaker 4 I used to have a best friend, and he was John Partridge. He didn't die.

Speaker 6 He just moved away.

Speaker 7 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 13 I had a best friend die too, Dan.

Speaker 12 Chris doesn't have a best friend.

Speaker 6 I don't even have one. That's a benefit of not having a best friend.

Speaker 3 Would you rather have a best friend who died or never had a best friend at all?

Speaker 4 My mom was a drug addict.

Speaker 13 Great question, Shakespeare.

Speaker 13 My best friend is like my mom because I don't really have a mom.

Speaker 12 Jessica, do you have a game we can play? Can we lighten it up around here a little bit? Do you have anything that can lighten up the proceedings a touch?

Speaker 13 Yes, I do. I actually have a, I'm bringing back an old classic, Dan.
It's called Brit or Knit.

Speaker 12 Did this rise to the level of classic?

Speaker 6 It's a classic. I don't feel like

Speaker 6 I'm longing for this.

Speaker 12 I don't feel like,

Speaker 13 please bring back Brit or Knit. And I thought of the perfect reason for it.
And we're going to talk more soccer because man, you lost to a League Two team in the League Cup.

Speaker 13 And the name of the team they lost to is very silly. So I said, let's bring back Britt or Nit.
I'm going to give you a few names. Dan, you're going to tell me Britt.

Speaker 13 Yes, that is an English soccer team or Knit. That is not an English soccer team.

Speaker 12 Okay, look, Mike likes this game.

Speaker 6 Dan's going to be so bad at this.

Speaker 13 I figured he would. Okay, let's start with this one.
Dan, Britt or Nit, Grimsby Town.

Speaker 12 No, that's not. Are you? Well, are you...
Yeah, I'm going to say that that's too creative to not be a team.

Speaker 4 So I'm going to say yes.

Speaker 13 Britt. That is correct.
Grimsby Town is the team that beat Man United yesterday.

Speaker 12 All right, but I'm guessing, though, I'm obviously not going to know any of these.

Speaker 13 Okay, let's go on to the next one. Shepherd's Bush.

Speaker 12 No, that's not a team.

Speaker 13 Knit. You're right.
That is a tube stop.

Speaker 6 Can you play the game right, please?

Speaker 15 Okay, I'm sorry.

Speaker 12 Well, I'm playing the game. All right.

Speaker 6 Brit or knit. The rules are simple.
All right. Classic.
All right, my bad.

Speaker 13 You're right. Actually, you lose on that one because you didn't say knit.
Okay, we'll move on to number three.

Speaker 13 Accrington Stanley, Brit or Knit?

Speaker 6 Uh, Knit.

Speaker 12 That sounds more like a law firm.

Speaker 13 It is, in fact, an English soccer team. You are incorrect.
That is Brit.

Speaker 13 Cock Foster's Football Club, Dan.

Speaker 6 Britt or Knit?

Speaker 6 She's at Foster's.

Speaker 12 I am going to say Brit.

Speaker 13 That is incorrect. Cock Foster is one of the most famous British tube stops because it's Cock Foster's.
Right.

Speaker 6 People laugh at it.

Speaker 4 The Foster. It's the Foster, right?

Speaker 13 Okay, we can move on from Brit or Nit, Dan. It doesn't seem like you're doing very well at it.

Speaker 12 We don't need to move on.

Speaker 15 Move on. Mike is enjoying.

Speaker 6 Okay, I'll get it.

Speaker 12 Mike's enjoying me just sinking into not knowing why it is that we're playing this game. Bosters.

Speaker 13 It's just funny, funny, silly names. Okay, I'll give you one more.

Speaker 13 Britt or Nit, Tooting Broadway.

Speaker 12 Look at the smile on Chris Cody's face.

Speaker 5 I'm just like, is he gonna say Brit or Nit? He's not.

Speaker 6 He's just gonna say no.

Speaker 6 All right, Brit. False.

Speaker 13 Incorrect. Also a tube stop.
So it is Brit, but not in the spirit of the game.

Speaker 12 Okay.

Speaker 4 You are really bad at that, Dave.

Speaker 12 Yeah, you knew I would be. And that's the...

Speaker 12 Jeremy, what's wrong? Are you okay?

Speaker 6 This is amazing.

Speaker 10 How are you so incapable of saying the right word?

Speaker 13 There's two words.

Speaker 6 Yeah, it's hard to do.

Speaker 4 Well produced, Chris. You found that well done.

Speaker 12 So a classic is what this game has been. When did we play this game before?

Speaker 13 I believe it was during the coronation of the King of England that we played Brit or Knit with the members of the coronation party that were going to attend the coronation.

Speaker 4 It's a classic.

Speaker 12 Did we ever play?

Speaker 13 Like the Duke of Bricklebrackle, I believe, was one of them. That was a knit.

Speaker 6 That's not a real place.

Speaker 6 Get out of here.

Speaker 12 Mel Kuyper Jr., turn that music off.

Speaker 12 Mel Kuyper Jr., let's put this picture up again. Mel Kuyper Jr.

Speaker 12 has said this morning on GetUp, while looking very much like the devil, that the Ohio State, Texas game, quote, 48 years I've been covering college football.

Speaker 12 Never remember a game as anticipated as this one.

Speaker 10 Can we just add in real quick to how the AP really screwed this thing up? I mean,

Speaker 10 you got to go number one versus number two. Penn State sneaks in at number two, so it's one versus three.
Jess, I mean, come on, the AP.

Speaker 5 Get you act together.

Speaker 13 Can I just say that hyperbole is an epidemic right now? There is just, I am excited to watch this game. I am excited to see Arch Manning.
Do not get me wrong. This is an important game.

Speaker 13 Texas preseason number one as an underdog on the road to start the season. It's very exciting.
I think both teams will be very good this year.

Speaker 13 However, we can't just say, this is the most highly anticipated football game. Blah, blah, blah.
Like we say that about everything and we just need to end the hyperbole.

Speaker 13 You don't need to try to sell people on Ohio State, Texas. People will watch it.
We know it's a big game.

Speaker 12 I just think that this is the myopia of Kuiper. He gets to see a Manning and so he gets to make an analysis against a champion and start seeing how valuable.

Speaker 12 He gets to start the examination of the thing that he loves to do most because we don't actually know what Arch Manning is, and he's dying to find out.

Speaker 12 That's why he's doing that, because in that respect, we can agree, right?

Speaker 12 This has never happened before, where a guy who's been waiting for two years that we've been talking about, talking about, talking about,

Speaker 12 who descends from royalty is going against the defending champion.

Speaker 13 100% in terms of like being able to see an attraction, this is as hyped a debut as we could possibly see even though he played some last year but to jess's point there were like three alabama lsu games that happened fairly recently that were all much bigger and called games of the century right i think the manning name we are all obviously very excited to see but i think if you want to even talk about another game on the same day where you're seeing a potential future first round talent playing against another potential for future first-round talent just at quarterback you have LSU and Clemson.

Speaker 13 So like there's just a lot of really good games this weekend. And I don't, I think it is a big game.
I'm not saying Mel Kuyper is wrong, but I think the Manning name is doing a lot there.

Speaker 13 But there's just, there's a lot of great games, and there always are a lot of great games.

Speaker 13 That's why it's college, like, College Football is great because there's such a high volume of games happening. I mean, we're going to see Bryce Underwood start this weekend.

Speaker 13 We're going to see Bill Belichick coach his first college game this weekend. Like, I'm honestly, I don't want to spoil my top five list that I have.

Speaker 13 I am a little bit more excited for that than I think even the Notre Dame game.

Speaker 15 Like, wow.

Speaker 13 Bill Belichick in his cutoff shirt will just tickle me.

Speaker 4 Okay. I'm excited to get to that top five because we were having a discussion.
And I might surprise you.

Speaker 4 As big a homer as I am for the University of Miami, I would concede that I think Clemson is an LSU as a bigger game.

Speaker 4 They got the Fowler-Herbie assignment because of the two quarterbacks, because of the fact that they've recently won national titles where Miami is still trying to scrap their way into that conversation.

Speaker 13 Yeah, that's going to be an exciting one and also one where like the loser is going to feel really bad because Clemson last season, you know, they snuck their way into the playoff via the ACC route, even though they lost to two SEC teams and couldn't couldn't beat South Carolina or Georgia last year.

Speaker 13 So they're going to feel bad if they can't beat LSU, especially because LSU's defense has been an issue and Clemson feels really good about Kay Klubnik starting another season and having improved a lot the last two seasons.

Speaker 13 But LSU hasn't won a season opener with Brian Kelly. So I don't know if he's going to pound on the table again if they lose.
I don't know how he's going to top that if they lose.

Speaker 13 But I think both teams would feel bad if they lost. And also neither would be that impacted because it's a non-conference game.

Speaker 13 But I think like, yeah,

Speaker 13 feelings would be hurt. Things would be, would be bad.

Speaker 12 It doesn't seem like that, though, the way that you described it is

Speaker 12 there are no real consequences.

Speaker 6 There are.

Speaker 13 There are, especially because, like I said, I think for Brian Kelly, like Dabbo has a lot of job security. It doesn't matter.

Speaker 13 But Brian Kelly, I think, you know, he won the SEC West a couple of years ago, and he has had tons of talent on his offenses, but he needs to put it together on the other side of the ball.

Speaker 13 And so I think that,

Speaker 13 yeah, I think LSU fans would certainly be upset if they lost to Clemson on Saturday.

Speaker 12 We'll get to your top five in a second. We'll get to the week one games in a second, but I want to go back to Hawaii and Stanford.

Speaker 12 And

Speaker 12 again, I will say, I assume that Andrew Luck will be good at that job, but they lost to Hawaii in the first game and lost with a kicker who learned how to kick on YouTube.

Speaker 12 Anything else from that game that you found interesting? Anything else from the games being played other than Avery Johnson's father fighting his other son that you found interesting? My gimmick.

Speaker 13 I have two things I want to talk about from last weekend. First thing,

Speaker 13 we found out this week, Kansas State and Iowa State, the

Speaker 13 Farmageddon game. Everyone's like, ooh, Farmageddon, that makes me really excited to watch Farmageddon.
Wow, we love that. Cool rivalry.

Speaker 13 Maybe you don't know a lot about Kansas State or Iowa State, but you're like, it's called Farmageddon. Apparently, the schools told the SPN do not use the name Farm Again.

Speaker 13 Like Rhys Davis said on his podcast the other day, he's like, yeah, they asked us not to say Farm Ageden, which is kind of BS because why? Like, are you...

Speaker 13 Do you think it's like offensive? Like, are you embarrassed about the farm part?

Speaker 6 Farms are cool.

Speaker 13 I don't know why that would be a no-no. So that's questionable, but also.

Speaker 12 Put it on the poll at Lebatard Show. Are farms cool? Because I don't think it's offensive.
Like, what's the problem? Why would you be offended by Farm Agedden?

Speaker 6 What is this, a cracker barrel?

Speaker 13 Yeah, I don't

Speaker 13 I think it's really strange. And they're also, both teams are in the same conference, but yet the game is not scheduled in conference play in 2027.
So that's weird.

Speaker 13 Like, why are they trying to cancel this series? Because they've been playing this series for over 100 years.

Speaker 6 It's what's one of the things that's not outstanding rivalries.

Speaker 12 There's no theory from anybody on why it is. Like, no, when Rhys Davis is saying this, why would they object to the term Pharmageddon? It's funny and clever.
Are we looking down on farms?

Speaker 4 I think they're looking down on Armageddon. I just love how dialed Jess is because she's listening to Reese David Podcast.

Speaker 13 College Game Day podcast, I think it's like Reese and Pete Thamel, but I don't, damn, I don't know. I really don't know.

Speaker 13 I saw like some random fan posted this Farmageddon graphic from last year where it was like both mascots on a tractor and then crashing into each other and exploding.

Speaker 13 And they were like, maybe they want to dial back on like the, you know, violent farm imagery. But that doesn't seem like that, that can't be it, right?

Speaker 12 I don't know. I'd love to know.
We got to get Pablo to find out. What was the other game, the Hawaii-Sanford game, had something in it that you found interesting?

Speaker 13 Yeah, the Stanford game had a fifth-year Stanford player transferred from Yale, have a big tackle for loss in the first half against Hawaii, tackled their quarterback, put Hawaii,

Speaker 13 you know, a little bit out of the end zone, I guess a little bit out of the red zone. So it was a big play.
It was a big play.

Speaker 13 And the Stanford player was like, I'm going to celebrate this by doing a TikTok dance. And he proceeded to do the TikTok dance for probably several seconds longer than is allowed.

Speaker 13 And also was very sensual in doing this TikTok dance, which is imitating a fifth-grade Indonesian boy dancing on a boat, Dan, which I know you knew, but I figured I would say anyways.

Speaker 12 I wish we could show people it. Like,

Speaker 12 describe...

Speaker 6 Chris Cody actually. Yeah, Chris Cody.

Speaker 13 Go ahead, Chris. Chris, you got it.

Speaker 4 And look, and this is not.

Speaker 13 But make it sexy. Make it sexy.

Speaker 12 That's how his dad dances. Wait a minute.
What was that? was that?

Speaker 15 Oh, boy.

Speaker 6 You got to make it sexy. Yeah, she did tell you to.

Speaker 12 And you immediately did.

Speaker 6 Well, because the dance was sexy.

Speaker 13 He made it sexy. And he got penalized.
And then Hawaii scored on the next play.

Speaker 6 So

Speaker 6 I think

Speaker 6 the difference.

Speaker 13 Yeah, it was a, I mean, it was a three-point game. Hawaii's kicker who, you know, learned how to kick on YouTube videos.

Speaker 13 He's from Japan and learned how to speak English playing football in Ohio came in and kicked the game winner. So I think Stanford's,

Speaker 13 going into the season, I think their wins total was like three and a half. And like, it's tough to find four games on their schedule, especially now that they lost to Hawaii.

Speaker 13 And I believe their total is going to have gone down to like two and a half, Mike. You can check me on that on the sports on DraftKings.

Speaker 13 But man, it's not looking good for Stanford. This is going to be a tough year for GM Andrew Luck, I think.

Speaker 12 When Mel Kuyper says that Ohio State, Texas is the most anticipated game in a half a century, I want to ask the group here, what do you guys believe to be the single most most interesting thing from the weekend?

Speaker 12 Or if we were trying to do five things from the college football weekend that's upcoming that you have an interest in, the top of the list is one player, not a team. Lee Corso.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 12 Okay, so it's Lee Corso over Arch Manning.

Speaker 3 Willie Simmons' debut.

Speaker 7 Yeah, Lee Corso.

Speaker 13 I'm excited for the USF Boise State game tonight.

Speaker 6 It's a great game.

Speaker 14 It's a drive at 5.30, and it's in Tampa.

Speaker 13 Tampa, and USF's only a five and a half point underdog, which feels a little low considering Boise State was in the playoffs last year. It was trapped.

Speaker 13 They lost Ashton Genty. And then after that, USF has to play Miami and Florida in the next two weeks.
So they've got a really tough non-conference schedule.

Speaker 10 I'm looking forward to seeing what this mess at Ohio Stadium is all about. I've never been there before.
I want to see if it's all cracked up to be.

Speaker 7 Really?

Speaker 12 You're going to go judge it? You're going to be the judge? You're going to be the judge of whether it's to be up to be. I'm going to judge.
You're going to judge whether it's cracked up to be.

Speaker 10 You know, they're going to top that I, whatever the hell that means. You know, but I'm going to be there.
I'm going to tell you if it's all it's cracked up to be.

Speaker 12 You sound like you're going in like a cynic. You don't think it's all it's cracked up to be.

Speaker 6 Maybe I am.

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Speaker 5 Don Lebatard.

Speaker 12 You were that kind of sad this morning taking the barrage of anger from Stugatz because you hadn't booked him enough interviews.

Speaker 12 The only reason I keep bringing this up is because you not are throwing a big party on Thursday. You're doing it, and I want people to support what you're doing because Stugatz has not made this easy.

Speaker 5 Stugats.

Speaker 7 Well, you know,

Speaker 6 well, yeah, you know.

Speaker 11 This is the Don Lebatar show with the Stugats.

Speaker 12 Since we're speaking of the fan experience, Jess, we were playing earlier this week on your own podcast, Echoes, which you do with Mike Golick. And again,

Speaker 12 I will tell people again that if you want,

Speaker 12 if you want like die-hard coverage of the things that you want that is really informed, you're not going to get a lot better Notre Dame coverage than you are with whatever Jessica and the Golicks are making.

Speaker 12 But Ian Book was on your podcast.

Speaker 12 And Ian Book, Mike Ryan thinks, you tell me whether we have this accurate, because Mike Ryan says you were trying to talk Ian Book off the position that Hard Rock Stadium is indeed a difficult place to play.

Speaker 12 So, you tell us what's really happening here. Are you trying to talk him off the position? Because Mike thought you were thinking of him while this was happening.

Speaker 18 And then it was so loud, couldn't hear anything. And then I remember like actually having a pretty good drive when I went in there.

Speaker 18 I threw a whole shot to Equinemius, started to drive down the field, thinking we'd maybe get three points or something before half, and then threw a pick six. Welcome to the turnover chain.

Speaker 18 So that was my experience, but

Speaker 18 it was hostile. And I I remember for the

Speaker 18 until we went down to Georgia, it was the loudest place. Honestly, it might be louder than Georgia.
I was like, top two loudest places I've ever played in my career.

Speaker 13 Louder than Michigan?

Speaker 14 Yeah.

Speaker 18 Yeah. Louder than Michigan.

Speaker 4 Blacksburg?

Speaker 18 Yeah.

Speaker 14 Yeah.

Speaker 13 This is a really good follow-up question because off the top of my head, I remembered two other college football stadiums that Ian played on on the road.

Speaker 13 And I was like, hey, I should follow up and ask him, are you sure? Do you remember the Michigan game that Notre Dame lost by a lot of points?

Speaker 13 Or do you remember the Virginia Tech game where everyone's like, this is going to be the toughest road environment you ever played in?

Speaker 13 I thought I was asking good follow-up questions there, but I guess not. I guess I'm a dumb idiot.

Speaker 15 Whatever.

Speaker 4 I mean, you said it. There was probably

Speaker 4 two follow-ups, too many. I mean, you said it was even louder than an athlete.

Speaker 6 She's just listing loud things. Yeah.

Speaker 13 Yeah, I mean, loud places that that specific person played in.

Speaker 13 But I think, Mike, like, I understand that you're very sensitive about people shitting on Hard Rock, and that you have to keep bringing up a game from eight years ago to prove that it's a loud stadium.

Speaker 13 And that's like, that's fine. If you can use this as bulletin board material, go right ahead.
It doesn't matter to me if that is the loudest stadium Ian Book played in. Oh, you're fairly famous.

Speaker 6 I actually, a different story.

Speaker 13 My face is like the same as Gojo's face throughout this entire clip.

Speaker 13 Whatever. I don't care.
If you want to do facial analysis of me, that's fine. I need to do that.

Speaker 12 In her defense,

Speaker 12 Ian Book was saying something that begged follow-ups because it's not something a lot of people say or believe. Like, that's, it's certainly not the, it's not the reputation that hard rock.

Speaker 4 It's the reputation of that 2017 game.

Speaker 13 Why would I want him to say Michigan's louder? Like, I don't. That's actually.

Speaker 6 Because it's not Miami. We already established you hate Miami.
It's all right. It's all right.
I hate Michigan. Louder than a jet engine.

Speaker 6 Louder than when Jenny. I would never live in Michigan.
Louder than when John Cena returned at the Royal Rumble.

Speaker 3 No, Jess, I totally agree.

Speaker 13 I like Miami more than Michigan. I'll give you that.

Speaker 3 I totally agree with you, though, Jess. Like, it's pathetic.
Who would hang their hat on the 2017 season as if that's something that's still relevant right now?

Speaker 3 I cannot understand what type of programme.

Speaker 12 Zazzlow has a problem with the shirt you're wearing. Zazzlo came in.
With my shirt?

Speaker 12 Yeah, Zazlo came in here.

Speaker 12 Zazzlow came in here whispered.

Speaker 1 But the 2017 national championships

Speaker 12 came in here today and whispered under his breath punk move.

Speaker 6 Balls.

Speaker 10 Balls, Jeremy. We were just talking about this a couple weeks ago, making fun of Auburn, who's claiming national championships from the early 20th century.

Speaker 10 I mean, I know we all know that 1910 Auburn team was a wagon, all right? But they're claiming.

Speaker 13 They actually, I did a deep dive into the Zazzo. You could check it out on my TikTok.
I went into the four national championships that Auburn claimed.

Speaker 13 1910 specifically, I believe that was the year in which they were six and one and lost to Texas on the road.

Speaker 13 And then the 1914 title, they claimed they had a tie against Georgia Tech, who was in the SEC at the time and both years there were teams in the Willow just kicked my computer because she's so cute there were teams that had better records than Auburn that were selected as national champions by like the computers or whatever I'm glad you did a deep dive there because I I remember that 1910 team differently Jess so that's a good job out of you right there but I'll also say this to you Jeremy as someone who I went to school at UCF I went to UCF.

Speaker 10 All right. I did.
I started.

Speaker 6 So you went to Santa Fe.

Speaker 13 Okay. You went to UCF.
I didn't know what to do.

Speaker 6 Angel, I thought you went to.

Speaker 10 Okay. There's a lot of misinformation being thrown out here, and I can settle this real quick.
I started my collegiate career at UCF. I was there for a couple years.
I transferred to UF. End of story.

Speaker 10 Graduated. But you were for UN and UF.

Speaker 11 When you got to Santa Fe.

Speaker 10 Never. If you had a gun to my head and said, Saszlo, take me to Santa Fe Community College right now or I pull the trigger, I'd be dead.
I have no idea where it is. I think you'd be lying.

Speaker 4 How about how about Blacksburg?

Speaker 6 How about Michigan?

Speaker 10 I didn't go to these schools.

Speaker 3 What's wrong with you? Dan, while you were gone, Auburn woke up one day and just claimed like 14 national championships across different people.

Speaker 7 Yeah, they learned from the best.

Speaker 13 Oh, can I tell you about the other two? So they also claimed 1958, which was the year that LSU won the national championship.

Speaker 13 And LSU and Auburn were in the same conference, but they didn't play against each other. And LSU was undefeated and beat Clemson in the Sugar Bowl.
And they were voted number one.

Speaker 13 This is the AP and Coaches Poll era. So they won the national championship.
And Auburn's claiming that actually,

Speaker 13 that one's ours too. That one I don't really understand quite as well.
I think that there was some

Speaker 13 modern computer that ranked that as them as number one that year, so they're just gonna retroactively claim it, which whatever, fine.

Speaker 13 But actually, I think the 2004 one is pretty interesting, Dan, which you, I'm sure, remember because this was like during our lifetimes. Um, Auburn is similar to UCF, Jeremy.

Speaker 13 They weren't chosen by the BCS to play in the championship game. That was Oklahoma and USC.
And so they are just like, well, we went undefeated in all our games.

Speaker 13 So we are just going to claim the national championship because we didn't get a chance to play for the title. So I kind of, that one, I could, I could get behind a little bit.

Speaker 13 You know what the shirt is? But then it validates Jeremy, so maybe not.

Speaker 3 The only 2017 undefeated champion.

Speaker 10 So what?

Speaker 3 I mean, the only undefeated team in the country.

Speaker 10 It's so lame. We're a national championship.

Speaker 11 You're a champion.

Speaker 10 When you didn't win. Miami Hurricanes then, 2000 national champion.
There you go. I gave it to him.

Speaker 13 But Zazzlo, the national championship is like a made-up thing. That's why

Speaker 13 I'm doing this.

Speaker 13 Six titles.

Speaker 13 Historically in college football, no one played for a national championship until like very modern history. And then everyone voted on it for a really long time.

Speaker 13 Like you would just, if you were Greg Cody, you'd just be like, I'm voting for Miami. And that's how people won the national championship.
This modern era of national championship.

Speaker 13 obsession is very unique to the very long over 130 year history of the sport.

Speaker 13 You know what I would like to just say that that is why I try to focus on things like pharmageddon and Hawaii and making fun of Stanford and their stupid tree when I can because they don't get enough attention because everyone's just like, oh, Texas and Ohio State, blah, blah, blah.

Speaker 13 You know what?

Speaker 10 I'm giving the Kanes the O2 Fiesta Bowl too. That Terry Porter was sus as hell.

Speaker 3 Oh, nice that you had something going on this century in the last 20 years. It was played.
You just don't agree with the result.

Speaker 7 That's different.

Speaker 14 Sus.

Speaker 6 You lost the game. Well, I didn't know.

Speaker 4 You know who did lose a game? We went to Santa Fe.

Speaker 7 UCF.

Speaker 3 Crazy that they're hanging on to 2017 with

Speaker 4 the best TV in their own state.

Speaker 12 We're going to get to Best Limited Fake in a second. And I was hoping to get Jessica's reaction to Greg Cody's insane anger, but we have to get to her top five because we don't have much time left.

Speaker 12 So, let's do this. What is the top five about?

Speaker 13 The top five is top five teams I'm excited to watch that aren't projected to make the playoffs. How about that? Wow, synergy.

Speaker 12 You guys, I asked you most interesting thing from the weekend, and you gave me a bunch of answers that weren't Belichick or Arch Manning or anything involving the games on Saturday, even.

Speaker 13 We said the games starting with tonight, Dan.

Speaker 6 First Frost tonight, Dan.

Speaker 10 UCF, Jacksonville State. You don't want to see First Frost 2.0, the second First Frost?

Speaker 6 Is it a Simmons?

Speaker 6 Scott Frost is back.

Speaker 4 I got a strong 20 on Alabama FSU.

Speaker 1 Number five, Jess.

Speaker 13 I mean, I think Alabama may be a sleeper this year. Number five, Nebraska.

Speaker 13 So they're playing this weekend at Arrowhead Stadium, which is, okay, is like Dylan Royola tried to get a game at Arrowhead Stadium. Like, this is taking it too far.
I actually looked into it.

Speaker 13 This is Cincinnati's home game that they scheduled at Arrowhead. So that is not why they're playing there.

Speaker 13 They snapped their seven-year streak of losing seasons last year. Dana Holgerson is the offensive coordinator.
Their defense was really, really good in 2024, but they lost a ton of players.

Speaker 13 So TBD, how good they really are. But I do think I'm intrigued by Dylan Rayola as a talent and to see if he gets any better

Speaker 13 and, you know, maybe can pull off an upset or two this year in the Big Ten.

Speaker 15 Number four.

Speaker 13 Number four, South Carolina. Now,

Speaker 13 some people do consider them a playoff sleeper.

Speaker 13 I think that their schedule is very difficult, but I do love Lenora Sellers on their quarterback, and I do love Dylan Stewart, who is an edge rusher on their defense.

Speaker 13 They did lose a good amount of solid defenders last year to the draft, but also not the best offensive line, Dan. But Lenora Sellers is very fun to watch.

Speaker 13 He's one of the most exciting quarterbacks, I think, who's flying a little bit under the radar going into the season.

Speaker 13 Finished the season really strong last year after being hurt for a few games. So I'm excited to watch South Carolina.

Speaker 12 Number three:

Speaker 13 Texas Tech.

Speaker 12 So much money they've spent.

Speaker 13 They've spent a lot of money. We'll see if it works.
I mean, it's the Big 12. The margin between the top six teams is pretty small.
So maybe it will. Maybe there'll be a playoff team after all.

Speaker 13 But either way, I'm excited to see how it all comes together.

Speaker 12 Number two,

Speaker 13 Vanderbilt.

Speaker 14 Really?

Speaker 13 The Doors.

Speaker 13 Dan Diego Pavia is back for another season. He had to do some like little court action to get back on the field for this year.
And they've got a really great tight end.

Speaker 13 And I just, I love Clark Lee, their head coach. He's a phenomenal coach.
And so will they be bowl eligible for the second season in a row?

Speaker 13 I don't know, but I would love to see them make a splash in the SEC and maybe have a couple more upsets this year. At the very least, beat He Freeze again.

Speaker 12 And finally, number one,

Speaker 6 North Carolina. Yeah.

Speaker 12 Yeah. What happened, Chris? You forgot?

Speaker 4 He was looking for the splash.

Speaker 13 I mean, Dan, here is like the generous case for North Carolina. They play some of the worst ACC teams this year.
They play Stanford, Wake, Cal.

Speaker 13 No, I love Cal. No disrespect to Cal.
I'm part of the Calgarhythm family.

Speaker 13 But their ACC schedule is not that difficult. I don't know if they're going to beat TCU.
But then they go on to play like Richmond and Charlotte for their next two games.

Speaker 13 So I think it could be a fun season for old Billy B.

Speaker 12 On Monday, I will tell you that's Labor Day. Mike, why are you and Billy laughing the way that you're?

Speaker 6 Chris is just splashing. There it is.

Speaker 15 There it is.

Speaker 6 There it is. Chris was screaming for 20 seconds.
Where is it?

Speaker 12 Jessica, we will talk to you on Monday as part of our Labor Day offerings after Miami, Notre Dame. Good talking to you.
Good seeing you. Nice hearing your voice again.

Speaker 13 Please leave my face up back there. My makeup looks really good in that.
Thank you.

Speaker 12 Yes, you are welcome.

Speaker 15 I did it myself.

Speaker 12 A programming note. On Monday, Labor Day, we will give you some limited offerings, even though we're off of Miami, Notre Dame in the college football weekend.

Speaker 12 And I'm here throughout the football season on Fridays.

Speaker 12 Every Friday throughout the football season, I will be here all the Fridays. I'm going all the Fridays as many as I'm going to be.
That includes tomorrow. That would include, that begins tomorrow.

Speaker 4 Dan, it's not just college football that we got to recap. Someone at the MLS offices thought it would be a really smart idea to have the Leagues Cup final at the exact same time as Miami, Notre Dame.

Speaker 6 Wow.

Speaker 2 This show is sponsored by BetterHelp.

Speaker 3 Man, these days are getting way too short.

Speaker 2 It's dark at like 5 p.m. I'm instantly ready for bed.
And look, this time of year, it can be tough. People get busy, seasons change.

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Speaker 4 folks the leaves are turning the weather's getting a little chillier that means the football games are more important that means football time should be Miller time.

Speaker 4 Game day hits different with a Miller light in your hand. From jaw-dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, my fantasy season's over already, but you know what makes that better? Miller time!

Speaker 4 It's the beer that's been there for every moment. 50 years of great taste, simple ingredients, and that iconic golden color you can spot from across the room.
And here's the kicker.

Speaker 4 It's just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. The original light beer since 1975 and still hitting different five decades later.

Speaker 4 So whatever your game day looks like, remember Miller time is always a good time. Miller Light grape tastes 96 calories.
Go to MillerLite.com slash stan to find delivery options near you.

Speaker 4 Or you can pick up Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time.
Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

Speaker 9 Holidays? Fun. Holidays as a dad?

Speaker 6 Tough.

Speaker 9 Travel, gifts, matching pajamas. Don't get me started on matching pajamas.
It's hot in Miami. My wife says, why don't you want to do this with us? My daughter's crying.

Speaker 5 Anyways, school parties, hosting a family.

Speaker 9 Next thing I know, I basically put Christmas on my credit card and have no idea what I spent where.

Speaker 9 If you want to keep your finances under control this holiday season, you need to be using Monarch, rated Wall Street Journal's best budgeting app at 25.

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Speaker 9 Monarch showed me how fast the holiday budget was disappearing: flights, gifts, late-night online shopping, and helped me pump the brakes before the bill hit.

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Speaker 9 Don't let financial opportunity slip through the cracks. Use code DAN at monarchmoney.com in your browser for half off your first year.

Speaker 9 That's 50% off your first year at monarchmoney.com with code DAN. And don't give me those matching pajamas.
I swear.

Speaker 5 Don Lebatard. Sports.
Stugats.

Speaker 15 More sports.

Speaker 11 This is the Don Lebatar show with the Stugats.

Speaker 12 Limited fake is one of the SUI categories. How much do we have here, Chris? Is this a big category or a small category?

Speaker 19 This is about 10 minutes.

Speaker 1 I like it. This is a strong one.

Speaker 12 10 minutes of limited fakes.

Speaker 19 And now the SUI nominees for best limited fake.

Speaker 19 Roy Bellamy, limited fake Flanagan's voice.

Speaker 15 Flanagans.

Speaker 12 That's good. Roy, you're really good at that.

Speaker 15 Roy, thanks. Roy.
Flanagans.

Speaker 19 Tony Kalatiud, limited fake Nikola Iokic, carrying the nuggets on his shoulders.

Speaker 15 Tomal Murray's

Speaker 15 Darren Gordon, God make a shot. Michael Gordon Jr.'s shoulder.
Double my shoulders.

Speaker 15 No, God was broke!

Speaker 15 Burns Malone!

Speaker 19 Amin L. Hassan and Chris Cody, limited fake Patrick Mahomes.

Speaker 15 Juju,

Speaker 15 I'm trying to do my Mahomes or Mason.

Speaker 15 Not quite. Come on, Mason.
Yeah, it's a little crimit the broad. Crimit the Bragg.

Speaker 20 If I've been smoking a couple of cigarettes, we'd be friends, Juju.

Speaker 15 Yeah.

Speaker 19 Mike Ryan, limited fake medieval accent.

Speaker 6 The contest of last Eve was most enthralling.

Speaker 15 Yeah, they'd be. a good thing.
The Knights of New York did battle against their foes with great vigor. That is much more annoying than

Speaker 11 their castle walls were laid besieged by the most fearsome force from the world.

Speaker 15 I'd rather have this than my wife.

Speaker 15 Yeah, I feel like.

Speaker 19 Greg Cody, limited fake John Fasenda.

Speaker 12 The frozen tundra.

Speaker 15 Not helpful.

Speaker 6 So, let's play for the people.

Speaker 2 My John Fasenda voice.

Speaker 15 The frozen tundra.

Speaker 12 Less less helpful.

Speaker 19 Mike Ryan, limited fake Jonathan Zaslow.

Speaker 5 Oh, god, honestly player.

Speaker 15 You talk? Hello, Fammer.

Speaker 15 You might be hit. It's your boy.
Coming around. It's your boy.
Pat Riley. It's your boy.
Don't talk bad about Pat Riley. I'll take your NF50.

Speaker 15 Who made that shot until he's 66? Hello, who?

Speaker 19 Amin Elhassen, limited fake Jack Nicholson.

Speaker 21 Every single act I do goes like this, and I'm Jack Nicholson, and I don't actually have to do anything else but do this thing right here.

Speaker 21 And I do my eyebrows, and then I die, and a rat comes around, and all of a sudden we win an Oscar.

Speaker 19 Hank Azaria, limited fake Jack Nicholson.

Speaker 22 Would you want him to go all Jack Nicholson on you and sit there with his sunglasses up, not giving a shit? I mean, what's the guy supposed to do, goddammit?

Speaker 19 Andrew Hawkins, limited fake Michael Irvin.

Speaker 15 You're gonna let him come in your house and tell you your beat that you made in six minutes isn't good enough. We can't stand for it.
Stand up for yourself, Jeremy. We're losing recipes.

Speaker 19 Jason Benetti, limited fake Jim Rome.

Speaker 23 White smoke, 445.

Speaker 23 Possible black smoke. Later on, Jim Lampley is here Friday.

Speaker 22 Welcome to the jungle.

Speaker 23 This is the premiere radio network.

Speaker 19 Chris Cody, limited fake Mike Breen's bang.

Speaker 15 He's got a good bang. Bang!

Speaker 15 Bang!

Speaker 15 Here you go.

Speaker 5 Got it back now.

Speaker 20 The pain has to be a part of it.

Speaker 15 Bang!

Speaker 19 Amino Hesson, limited fake Stephen A. Smith.

Speaker 20 Now here's the thing that Lebatt. I know that the scoreboard already says I've won this thing.

Speaker 20 But if you mean to tell me I'm afraid of Andrew Hawkins, I will put my reputation on the line and I will say this.

Speaker 20 Winner take off of this last.

Speaker 19 Greg Cody limited fake Joe Biden as the werewolf of Scranton.

Speaker 15 I'm the werewolf of Scranton.

Speaker 19 Andrew Hawkins and Amin L. Hesson, limited fake Cameron and Mace.

Speaker 9 And that's crazy.

Speaker 6 You wait.

Speaker 4 The moderator lobs it up for something.

Speaker 6 That's crazy.

Speaker 15 First time hosting a show.

Speaker 20 He's not Molly Karam.

Speaker 20 He's Folly Karen.

Speaker 15 Come on, yo. What is he doing? That's crazy.

Speaker 20 He's Molly not Karen.

Speaker 6 You mad.

Speaker 15 Bill O'Reilly. He looking like a fat Bill O'Reilly.
Let's try this. He's the mean L.

Speaker 20 Sassin.

Speaker 9 I'm a mean assassin.

Speaker 15 Yo, Dan, he's the man. He's a mean old bastard.

Speaker 19 Chris Cody, limited fake Danny DeVito as the penguin.

Speaker 1 I love when the penguin goes to like the holiday party.

Speaker 23 He's just like, eh.

Speaker 15 Ooh, good impression.

Speaker 3 Nobody thinks it's weird that he looks like that.

Speaker 15 It's just like.

Speaker 15 Yeah, he runs for mayor. Awful movie.

Speaker 12 In terms of things not holding up,

Speaker 7 I remember, okay.

Speaker 4 I mean, Rudy Giuliani looked the way that he did.

Speaker 19 Amin El Hessen, limited fake John Taffer.

Speaker 20 You're using your bare hands. What are you doing, you cross-contaminating anyway?

Speaker 15 You sick son of a kill somebody.

Speaker 19 Mike Ryan, limited fake RFK Jr.

Speaker 15 That's who's killing us, by the way.

Speaker 12 I do want to get to your

Speaker 15 thank you.

Speaker 15 It's a little

Speaker 15 polio.

Speaker 15 I love polio.

Speaker 6 This I'm here for.

Speaker 19 Amino Hesson, limited fake Don Kang.

Speaker 20 I'm often confused with the one and only Don King. We are very different individuals, I promise you that.
He says only in America, I say strictly in the United States.

Speaker 20 And I'm here to promulgate the indefatigable, pugilistic showdown between

Speaker 20 the dastardly, delicious Draymond Green.

Speaker 15 Yes. And the rudely rudimentary Rudy Gobert.
All right.

Speaker 20 It's a showdown in Minnesota.

Speaker 19 Jonathan Zaszlo, limited fake Al Pacino in Carlito's way.

Speaker 10 You think you're big time?

Speaker 15 Are you going to die?

Speaker 15 Big time.

Speaker 19 Amin El Hessen, limited fake Tom Hardy.

Speaker 20 See, uh, Kev, me and the arrogance,

Speaker 15 we've got a problem, ain't it?

Speaker 19 Billy Gill and Mike Ryan, limited fake David Beckham.

Speaker 15 No, no.

Speaker 13 Daddy talk like this and say push.

Speaker 12 Yes, he did, Billy. It was strange.

Speaker 4 His voice touched him quite much.

Speaker 19 you tell the truth mike ryan limited fake tom brokal terrible news

Speaker 15 confused with walter cronkine

Speaker 15 i'm from the greatest generation

Speaker 19 diana russini limited fake diana russini's mom mom just can't

Speaker 24 breaking news breaking news

Speaker 24 what happened what happened should i tell your father are you on the fan

Speaker 24 Are you on the fan right now? Did Mike Greenberg call you yet? Are you ever going to go back to ESPN?

Speaker 24 people think it's so weird you're a writer now all those years on tv all those years and now you write who reads that

Speaker 24 why did he take a job at the atlantic mom i work at the athletic what

Speaker 15 are you on youtube

Speaker 24 daddy daddy says you're doing a live show on the draft where is it channel seven you know those those girls on eyewitness news they look good they're mothers they look good though amino hesson limited fake pirate chat GPT recap of Heat Game.

Speaker 20 Our Matey, gather around for a tale of the Heat Clippers showdown. The Miami Heat sailed into the battle against the Los Angeles Clippers, bringing fire on the court.

Speaker 20 The clash be fierce, with both sides giving it their all.

Speaker 20 The Heat fired cannons from beyond the ark, but the Clippers weren't about to be left in Davy Jones' locker.

Speaker 15 Really a good pirate.

Speaker 20 The game was tight, with both teams exchanging blows like a mighty storm at sea. In the end, t'was the heat who came out victorious, outlasting the Clippers with cut shots and solid defense.

Speaker 15 Bang!

Speaker 19 Billy Gill, limited fake Shaggy.

Speaker 15 Mr. Lover, Lover.

Speaker 19 Chris Cody and Mike Ryan, limited fake Dan, big timing Dominique.

Speaker 5 I say, what up, Dan?

Speaker 2 You didn't even turn your neck.

Speaker 9 You just, you shot me with the Chuck Me the Deuces.

Speaker 15 Everyone rolled. Damn.
Who do you think you are?

Speaker 12 I just didn't know it was you. I just thought somebody was shouting my name.

Speaker 5 Oh, another day, driving to work.

Speaker 2 Someone's shouting my name.

Speaker 6 Hey, what's up?

Speaker 15 How's it going?

Speaker 7 I'm an ally.

Speaker 7 He's a big time writer, just like me.

Speaker 5 I'm an ally, but but

Speaker 15 that's what you do. Is that kind of thing?

Speaker 6 No, that's what I do.

Speaker 18 That's you, Dan.

Speaker 15 I'm an

Speaker 15 I'm an ally. Wait, do I have the button?

Speaker 15 I'm an ally.

Speaker 19 Greg Cody, limited fake alien from Scranton.

Speaker 19 I am an alien from Scranton.

Speaker 25 I'm an alien.

Speaker 15 Alienate.

Speaker 25 There are aliens all over the United States.

Speaker 25 I wanted to make clear that I'm an alien from Scranton.

Speaker 19 Amino Hesson, limited fake Barack Obama.

Speaker 15 Let me be clear.

Speaker 20 When I heard the news that Stephen A. Smith decided he should run for office, I said that's a great American.
Now, some folks across the aisle don't like that. They want Skibalis to be the nominee.

Speaker 20 but uh i told my family sasha shelp

Speaker 19 charlie kravitz limited fake dan lebetard put me next to you at your darkest moment mr uber driver

Speaker 19 no dominique it's a cartel and bobcraft not getting anyone to hire boob billichex that's some gangster

Speaker 15 these gladiator games They're feeding the church of football, the cathedral.

Speaker 19 Dan Lebatard, limited fake Nikola Jokic.

Speaker 12 I just want horse.

Speaker 19 Tim Kirchin, limited fake Ed Helms in the hangover.

Speaker 15 Look at me. I married a hooker.

Speaker 25 I got no front teeth.

Speaker 19 Greg Cody and Chris Cody, limited fake Joe Biden.

Speaker 25 Sitting around the kitchen table in Scranton.

Speaker 25 My dad said, Joey, someday you could be vice president.

Speaker 15 Not bad.

Speaker 15 Try without the mask.

Speaker 15 Come on.

Speaker 15 Give it a whirl.

Speaker 15 table and scranton all he's got is scranton that's all he's got

Speaker 20 it is all he's got it you're so right there

Speaker 15 that's

Speaker 15 we got it

Speaker 15 do i go anywhere else

Speaker 19 mike ryan and chris cody limited fake chorus of adam sandlers i i do believe that yes we will do that we would uh we will do that yes i hate that movie so much much.

Speaker 20 He does an amazing job.

Speaker 15 That's really good. Oh, do you hate that impression? Oh, my God.
It's also really good. So bad.

Speaker 12 A chorus of Adam Sandler.

Speaker 15 Impression is so bad.

Speaker 15 Hey, hoo-hoo.

Speaker 15 What?

Speaker 19 Stop looking at me, Swan.

Speaker 15 Conditioner is better.

Speaker 15 I leave the hair silky and smooth.

Speaker 19 Unknown listeners, limited fake Steve from Sex and the City.

Speaker 14 Liranda?

Speaker 15 Yeah!

Speaker 15 Steve!

Speaker 15 Give it to Steve!

Speaker 15 I'm an ally!

Speaker 4 Folks, the leaves are turning. The weather's getting a little chillier.
That means the football games are more important.

Speaker 5 That means football time should be Miller time.

Speaker 4 Game day hits different with a Miller light in your hand. From jaw-dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, my fantasy season's over already, but you know what makes that better? Miller time!

Speaker 4 It's the beer that's been there for every moment. 50 years of great taste, simple ingredients, and that iconic golden color you can spot from across the room.

Speaker 4 And here's the kicker: it's just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. The original light beer since 1975 and still hitting different five decades later.

Speaker 4 So whatever your game day looks like, remember Miller time is always a good time. Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories.
Go to millerlight.com/slash stan to find delivery options near you.

Speaker 4 Or you can pick up Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time.
Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

Speaker 17 What does Zinn give you? Not just smoke-free nicotine satisfaction, but real freedom. Freedom to do what you love and choose your rewards.

Speaker 17 With Zinn Rewards, you can redeem points for premium tech, outdoor gear, and gift cards to your favorite retailers. Find your Zen and keep finding rewards that fit your lifestyle.

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Speaker 17 Warning. This product contains nicotine.
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