Hour 2: Jessica's Weekend Observations (feat. Kenan Thompson)

Speaker 1 Folks, losing at fantasy football has consequences.

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Speaker 18 This is the Don Levatar Show with the Stew Gots Podcast.

Speaker 2 This episode of the Dan Labatar Show with Stew Gots is presented by Smirnoff.

Speaker 1 We do game days. Please drink responsibly.

Speaker 17 The Smirnoff Company, New York, New York.

Speaker 19 So that was great.

Speaker 4 That was good. Killed it.

Speaker 17 What an interview, guys.

Speaker 20 I don't think we're trailing.

Speaker 21 I think we're all right.

Speaker 17 Nah,

Speaker 22 it's funny when you mess up, respectfully.

Speaker 24 I'm in the jet camp.

Speaker 4 Well,

Speaker 19 we didn't have home court.

Speaker 25 Ultimately, the goal is to come back back 1-1.

Speaker 6 So we're trailing right now.

Speaker 27 The game's not over.

Speaker 24 Oh, you're giving up on the game.

Speaker 22 I think the best part of the game is still ahead of us.

Speaker 29 Yeah.

Speaker 30 It's not over. You think it was so bad that we can't come back?

Speaker 32 Series hasn't even started yet.

Speaker 33 No, I think we're in good shape.

Speaker 33 It wasn't a great play to hit the button in the middle of his answer and also to play a sound bite that kind of felt like he needed to be quiet.

Speaker 35 I don't think it was the button pressing. I think it was Dominique asking Steve if he was a better golfer than anyone currently on the PGA tour, which just befuddled him.

Speaker 37 That was interesting.

Speaker 33 He didn't know. And even about the rugby stay, there was a lot of moments where Steve was kind of like, what are we doing here? But I liked it, though, because it was a good setup.

Speaker 33 When the button happened, though, that was the moment where I was going to be able to do that.

Speaker 19 That's really

Speaker 6 good. Now he feels disrespected.

Speaker 40 Here's a phone because it was all kind of bad.

Speaker 1 It's never good when I'm the one that shines in interviews.

Speaker 41 You were great, man.

Speaker 17 That's just what no one is.

Speaker 28 I'm talking about carrying

Speaker 17 God in that interview.

Speaker 20 Way to be accountable, Chris.

Speaker 17 You were great.

Speaker 17 I mean, you did it.

Speaker 6 I did get him to say that he would whoop Phil Mickelson's ass. That was a good one.
And

Speaker 30 I got a bucket, and then I proceeded to turn the ball over for the rest of the quarter.

Speaker 33 We were leaning on you to take all the shots, so you're going to miss a couple, right?

Speaker 33 It was which sound bite hit? I don't think we're talking enough about like

Speaker 19 in the middle of an answer.

Speaker 43 And he was like a little long in the answer, which is like a good answer.

Speaker 33 But it felt there was a moment where he you could see him thinking, Was that purposely done?

Speaker 33 Are they like telling me to get off the stage because I'm speaking too long?

Speaker 6 Hand up accountability.

Speaker 30 I blew it. I blew the interview.

Speaker 22 I have an idea how we can get back out ahead,

Speaker 22 which is by doing weekend observations.

Speaker 6 Yeah, do it. Well done.

Speaker 15 It is time for a story. Jessica's game notes.

Speaker 19 No one in the media will tell you what happened better than my girl, Jess.

Speaker 22 Weekend Observations is presented by Miller Light.

Speaker 45 Dom!

Speaker 22 It's one of the busiest times on the sports calendar, and we're one of the biggest podcasts in sports. But inexplicably, our hosts left us.

Speaker 22 One went on an indefinite hiatus, and one took his elegant swan on a work trip to LA.

Speaker 22 But you know what they say? The show must go on. And this segment is still sponsored.
So, just like that, make no mistake about it, Dominique, you, and Charlie Kravitz are back.

Speaker 22 Charlie Kravitz, the vanilla snack.

Speaker 15 Snack attack.

Speaker 22 For only the second time in men's NCAA tournament history, four one seeds are in the final four. For context, the last time that happened, Stugat still came to work every day.

Speaker 22 The L in Lebetard stands for Los Angeles for the exclusive Sedano sit-down.

Speaker 22 Jeff Conine inducted into the Marlins Hall of Fame, Mr. Marlin.

Speaker 22 Put it on the poll. Can you be called Mr.
Marlin if you played more seasons not on the Marlins than on the Marlins?

Speaker 22 Anytime there's a stoppage in play, Stan Van Gundy has to let you know how disgusted he is by it. Nobody, and I mean nobody, hates to see a review coming like Stan Van Gundy.
SVG.

Speaker 22 Yankees, with nine home runs in one game. The Bronx Bombers.
WFAN taking calls all day about people wanting to talk bat size. That's what New York Sports Radio is all about.

Speaker 22 The Yankees paying an MIT physicist instead of Juan Soto. Chess, not checkers.

Speaker 22 Also, Aaron Judge, do it in the playoffs. BYU.
The rare team to score 88 points in a college basketball game, only to lose by 25. Alabama, live by the three.
Alabama die by the three.

Speaker 22 Paige Beckers bucket getter. Dominique, do you know what the B in Beckers stands for?

Speaker 47 I don't.

Speaker 22 Bucket getter.

Speaker 33 You just told me. Yeah.
You did know, actually.

Speaker 48 I did. You don't listen.

Speaker 22 Pete Crowe Armstrong, Cannon, PCA.

Speaker 22 November 8th, Frank Reich, Bill Belichick. Go ahead and circle it.

Speaker 22 I got the Stanford job.

Speaker 29 This was breaking news like an hour ago.

Speaker 21 Oh, wow.

Speaker 22 Texas Tech, choked. If I was a Texas Tech fan, I would never recover from that loss.
You know what the W and Walter Clayton Jr. stands for?

Speaker 4 Winner.

Speaker 47 Oh.

Speaker 22 You know what the C and Walter Clayton Jr. stands for?

Speaker 43 Championship?

Speaker 41 Closer.

Speaker 22 You know what the J and Walter Clayton Jr. stands for?

Speaker 22 No. Just give him the ball and get the bleep out of the way.
Alex Ovechkin, still doing it.

Speaker 17 Dance and make him dance.

Speaker 48 Death.

Speaker 22 Taxes. And Don Staley in a final four.

Speaker 22 You tell Don Staley where the final four is, and she'll make sure she's there.

Speaker 22 The Jets GM announced that he believes Justin Fields will be the starter. Buddy, that's what the $30 million guaranteed already told us.

Speaker 22 Justin Verlander, San Francisco giant. Hmm.

Speaker 22 Miami Marlins, Feisty.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 33 Mr. Marla.

Speaker 22 Congratulations to the guy who really went out on a limb and picked all four one seats to make the final four.

Speaker 22 Dan Lebetard in Los Angeles asking comedians what's the worst part of the life.

Speaker 22 Dan, the worst part of the life is listening to you interview comedians.

Speaker 17 What happened there?

Speaker 22 Taylor.

Speaker 22 Bill Belichick's girlfriend Jordan trolled the Atlanta Falcons with an Instagram post on 328.

Speaker 22 When Bill Belichick won that Super Bowl against the Falcons, Jordan was 15 and Stugat still came to work every day.

Speaker 22 Big Ten with zero titles since 2000. Hey, Big Ten, do it in the NCAA tournament.

Speaker 22 Haley Van Lith, the first player in history to take three different teams to the Elite Eight. You know what they say?

Speaker 22 I don't. If you have three Elite Eights, you don't have one.

Speaker 22 Auburn's Denver Jones. Clutch.

Speaker 22 In honor of Denver Jones, top five athletes and celebrities named after a U.S. city.

Speaker 21 OLI,

Speaker 22 Houston Nutt,

Speaker 22 Aaliyah Boston,

Speaker 22 Austin Rivers,

Speaker 22 Memphis DePai,

Speaker 22 Cal Raleigh,

Speaker 22 Grover Cleveland,

Speaker 22 John Stockton,

Speaker 22 Number Five, Orlando Pace,

Speaker 22 Number Four, Dallas Clark.

Speaker 22 Number three, Joaquin Phoenix.

Speaker 22 Number two, Ron Washington.

Speaker 22 Number one, Tiffany Pollard.

Speaker 22 New York.

Speaker 38 Here come the blues.

Speaker 22 UCLA beating LSU to make the program's first Final Four. You know what they say.

Speaker 22 First time for everything.

Speaker 22 I'm not sure a coach has ever handled leaving a school worse than Kevin Willard leaving Maryland

Speaker 22 terps headline Steelers are considering Aaron Rodgers I hate them my personal hell would be watching Aaron Rodgers play for the Steelers speaking of hell Art Ryles Dominique those are the weekend observations

Speaker 40 quickest

Speaker 12 Quickest weekend observations we've had here in quite some time. That was really good.

Speaker 24 Thank you.

Speaker 17 I mean, we're back even too.

Speaker 22 Tuvac has really been taking his time lately.

Speaker 12 That was a run that made us feel good about ourselves headed into game two.

Speaker 24 Why are you giving up on game one?

Speaker 46 The whole day?

Speaker 17 No, we still got it. We are fighting back.

Speaker 32 We lost it with questions in the follow-ups to Lucy. We got two goals.

Speaker 19 We believed it wasn't our day.

Speaker 30 Everyone believes we're still in it.

Speaker 19 You don't want to be.

Speaker 30 Hey, we're the penalty box button.

Speaker 43 We don't want anybody in here who is only willing to.

Speaker 38 I'd like to see you find that button.

Speaker 1 I'll see if my microphone can bump into it we do have a big guest finishing the show here that we could we could have a nice little comeback here we're good to i'm great at interviews guys

Speaker 23 agreed i got your back bro i appreciate it sure it is when you're like go ahead chris ask him what you want to ask him yes well and like the variations of that that was great what you got chris you like try to sound cool with it so it seems natural chris what you got over there oh was that that's what i was doing i was trying to sound cool I wasn't trying to sound cool.

Speaker 30 I just knew before the interview, you were like, hey, if you need me,

Speaker 31 we're breaking down film right now.

Speaker 38 There's just certain things in your game that I don't like right now.

Speaker 50 We got to work that out.

Speaker 51 There's private comms. You're not comfortable with the private comms because your microphone will hit them.

Speaker 40 And that way, Chris can just go as opposed to, go ahead, Chris, what you got.

Speaker 1 Or even a head nod to me.

Speaker 8 You next.

Speaker 24 I gave you a head nod.

Speaker 43 And you, so there was one time he was trying to get your, like, whirling back and forth.

Speaker 1 That was when you wanted the ball back. I was next, and you're like, it was me.

Speaker 29 But then he'll do this.

Speaker 17 Yeah. And then he'll do this.

Speaker 22 It's like a traffic cop.

Speaker 5 I will, I

Speaker 30 hand up.

Speaker 4 I'm blew it. I'm blew it.
I appreciate the coaching.

Speaker 4 We'll get better.

Speaker 30 I appreciate that Jess came in and scored a flurry of buckets to get us back in the game, Michael.

Speaker 11 Don't forget, Pablo confused everybody.

Speaker 32 It's also Pablo's fault.

Speaker 29 Also, Taylor deserves credit for weekend observations because this is a place now where we lift each other up, right?

Speaker 24 You know what?

Speaker 30 I cannot wait until the show awards how many different ways you guys find a way to clown me for doing terrible interviews.

Speaker 6 It's got to be fun.

Speaker 30 I'm looking forward to it.

Speaker 49 Look, man, you're 0 for 2, but you have a pretty big star joining us a little bit later in the show.

Speaker 12 And that's a great opportunity to get some positive mojo going as we try to steal game two on the road.

Speaker 33 I'm going to go Carlton though in this because I had a big fan of our last guest.

Speaker 27 So I'm just going to go off the wing here and just.

Speaker 27 Oh, not like in a good way.

Speaker 33 I'm talking about at the end of the game in the fresh prince where Carlton steals the ball off a wheel and just heaves it at the hoop.

Speaker 33 So I'm just telling you right now, I have no strategy going into this.

Speaker 43 I'm just, I'm going to say open-ended things.

Speaker 17 I love it.

Speaker 21 I love it.

Speaker 33 It's going to be hard to kind of follow and track.

Speaker 30 You're leading it now.

Speaker 4 We just determine it.

Speaker 15 I got a list of questions that I'm actually interested in with our final guest.

Speaker 30 No one said who it is. Is that, are we keeping it secret on purpose?

Speaker 50 I don't understand why we're doing that.

Speaker 9 It's Keenan Thompson.

Speaker 6 You kept doing it.

Speaker 30 You started.

Speaker 6 It's all like, I'll be right back.

Speaker 25 Chris also said we have a pretty good guest coming.

Speaker 32 I mean, not to

Speaker 9 nitpick, but you did cut him off there.

Speaker 12 I thought he was getting to the T's, but then he couldn't get to the T's.

Speaker 23 But I like the idea of Hawk running it.

Speaker 38 We got to run the offense through something.

Speaker 11 Yeah, I think we should definitely run offense through Hawk.

Speaker 39 I refuse. I have a question.

Speaker 33 This is me refusing to go in on punt return in the preseason game.

Speaker 27 I did not prepare to return punts.

Speaker 44 And sorry, coach.

Speaker 33 I respectfully decline.

Speaker 36 I'll see you next game.

Speaker 30 Did you play high school sports, Mike?

Speaker 50 No, not really.

Speaker 52 Like, I played spring football one time, and I wrestled briefly, but I don't know.

Speaker 22 Did they have a real ball when you played?

Speaker 25 It wasn't like Tony's

Speaker 49 workout for FIU football.

Speaker 40 We played some real springball.

Speaker 1 If you're not sure if you played high school sports, you probably could play.

Speaker 5 No, it's not.

Speaker 6 It's not a kind of type of thing.

Speaker 17 PE doesn't count.

Speaker 38 I think I explained the context of it.

Speaker 52 I went through spring, played the spring game, realized that the sport hurt.

Speaker 17 It's not like I lettered in it, so I don't feel like I'm not going to.

Speaker 49 I feel like if I say yes, it's stolen valor.

Speaker 22 That's why you should have said no.

Speaker 45 Obviously,

Speaker 6 maybe, though, for a few weeks.

Speaker 40 No, I wrestled for

Speaker 17 the idea of playing high school school.

Speaker 50 Oh, well, like if you want to get into when my mom died, so I stopped doing that.

Speaker 17 Oh, there we go.

Speaker 38 And then, you know, the football.

Speaker 48 It's not a simple no.

Speaker 45 Great to.

Speaker 33 No, would have put us where we needed to drive Michael in that one.

Speaker 51 But look at all the great content that we got out of it again.

Speaker 6 It's much like the interview with Steve Williams.

Speaker 33 We got a lot of great content out of it, so you can't look at it through just, you know, the lens of was the interview great or no.

Speaker 25 What's unfortunate is I brought my A-game.

Speaker 6 Yeah. I had a game one

Speaker 26 winning effort today.

Speaker 21 Just being accountable.

Speaker 30 So it was unfair of me to ask if you played high school sports because I knew the answer by how you've been conducting yourself amongst this team.

Speaker 15 Now, it's like, yeah, that guy, not a team sport guy.

Speaker 26 That's not why.

Speaker 25 That's not why I don't consider myself a high school athlete.

Speaker 40 It's my lack of athleticism.

Speaker 17 And effectiveness when I took the field.

Speaker 19 No, there's a lot of high school athletes are not athletes.

Speaker 51 I also didn't like my coaches.

Speaker 5 Call wrestling and team sports.

Speaker 22 Who likes their high school coaches?

Speaker 32 I liked all the other high school coaches.

Speaker 12 Man, I wish I would have played baseball.

Speaker 50 Padrones seemed so fun.

Speaker 47 Yeah.

Speaker 50 I wasn't getting on that team, though.

Speaker 33 Tough.

Speaker 12 No, they were just juice to the gills.

Speaker 33 Jeez, that's when baseball was fun.

Speaker 15 We got a baseball story.

Speaker 5 Baseball was baseball.

Speaker 30 We got a baseball story that's about... Well, it's not quite cheating yet.
They might turn it into cheating real soon.

Speaker 23 It feels like cheating, Dom.

Speaker 30 The torpedo bats?

Speaker 11 It feels like cheating.

Speaker 24 How does it feel like cheating?

Speaker 31 There's more bat.

Speaker 31 And they'll argue.

Speaker 25 They'll be like, well, it's actually the same amount of bat.

Speaker 6 I'm like, no, there's a shift in the weight.

Speaker 14 The part of the bat that was smaller is now bigger. That's where most of the balls hit the bat.

Speaker 40 That feels like cheating.

Speaker 30 It's a bowling pill now. To be clear,

Speaker 30 the Yankees are using a different type of bat called a torpedo bat. That moves.
Great name. Yeah.

Speaker 30 That moves, because it looks like a torpedo, that moves some of the weight and mass of the bat into a place where the ball more often hits and it's allowed them to hit, what's the number, it's like 12 home runs and

Speaker 30 nine innings or something like that?

Speaker 6 Close.

Speaker 30 It's just a ridiculous, it's clear that it's a result of them, of the bats and it's not because they just all of a sudden became great baseball players.

Speaker 9 I read a story and apparently an MIT scientist is behind all this and we really needed to go MIT for the solution to be bigger bat.

Speaker 30 It's not a bigger bat, Mike.

Speaker 14 It still falls within the rules of the what's maybe the formula that they followed maybe they still would stay within the rules it's kind of like the tush push this is baseball's tush push that's actually a great comp paw you you had a pretty good game one effort thank you thank you he was great all right what's happening

Speaker 34 hey friends jeremy here the nba on prime is back tomorrow with another great emirates nba cup doubleheader the night starts with pascal siakam and the indiana pacers meeting donovan mitchell and the cleveland cavaliers a matchup that if tyrese halliburton was healthy, probably would have been a potential Easter Conference Finals preview.

Speaker 34 Instead, you got Donovan Mitchell, who's averaging about 30 a game, and the Pacers who are struggling, but those games on prime are always intense.

Speaker 2 And then it's down to Texas as Nikola Jokic and the Denver Nuggets, as Big Honey plays some of the best basketball of his career, which is certainly saying something.

Speaker 34 Get their first look at Kevin Durant and the new look Houston Rockets.

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Speaker 34 Just sign up for a 30-day free trial to get started today.

Speaker 6 Pacers, Cavs, Nuggets, and Rockets.

Speaker 34 Coverage starts tomorrow at 6.30 p.m. Eastern, only on Prime.
Restrictions apply. See amazon.com slash Amazon Prime for details.

Speaker 14 Real quick, want to talk to you about how GameTime is the official ticketing partner of the Dan Lebetard show.

Speaker 16 Grateful that GameTime has been on with us as long as they have because I use this product all the time. I travel for football.
If I'm in a new city, I like to see what concerts are in town.

Speaker 16 One of the very first things I check is my favorite app for the secondary ticket market, the GameTime app.

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Speaker 1 This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Man, these days are getting way too short.
It's dark at like 5 p.m. I'm instantly ready for bed.
And look, this time of year, it can be tough.

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Speaker 50 Don Lebatard.

Speaker 30 I took my son to the barbershop, get a haircut, and my man gave out some limp dap.

Speaker 18 oh no damn damn damn stugats i disowned them i threw him right under the bus i was like whose kid is that out here dishing out limp dap this is the dun levatar show with the stugats

Speaker 30 We got our guests here, guys, so we can stop talking about baseball because who who wants to do that?

Speaker 30 Keenan Thompson is here to join us. Thank you, sir.

Speaker 47 What's good with y'all? Good morning.

Speaker 30 Chilling, chilling, chilling. We're having a good time.
I wanted to start with you with Morgan Wallen.

Speaker 16 I saw him walk off the set.

Speaker 30 Who did he call the N-word and why didn't you punch him?

Speaker 5 Jeez.

Speaker 47 Hilarious.

Speaker 47 What happens when Dan ain't on the show?

Speaker 27 This is just anything goes.

Speaker 30 So I'll be clear with you, Keaton. I had an interview earlier where I interviewed Steve Williams, Tigers former caddy, and I did an awful thing.

Speaker 30 I asked him poor questions, and then I moved my microphone while he was answering a question, and I hit this button.

Speaker 30 While he was answering a question, it was a complete mistake. So

Speaker 30 I'm reeling right now, Keenan.

Speaker 21 I'm reeling.

Speaker 30 And I'm like, you know what? I got a big star coming up at Keenan Thompson. I'm about to have a hell of an interview.
I'm going to start it off with a spicy question.

Speaker 47 That's right. That's mad spicy.
That to answer your question, I don't know.

Speaker 47 You know, it's how he's feeling, I guess. You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't even realize, I don't know if he realized what he was doing.

Speaker 30 Well, I'm Keenan's here because he's teamed up with Phantom Pharmaceuticals to raise awareness about GERD. We appreciate you, Keenan.
What's your connection?

Speaker 47 You know, you know what GERD is?

Speaker 30 Yeah, I know what it is. It's an intestinal, right? Go ahead.

Speaker 47 It's a, yeah, it's a gastro it stands for gastroesophageal

Speaker 47 reflux disease reflux disease yeah reflux disease good job everybody that's that's the work

Speaker 47 um but no i personally like was suffering with acid reflux and uh was prescribed for quesna and i've overcome it now so I just wanted to spread the word about that in case anybody else might be having similar symptoms and they don't know necessarily how to approach it, you know, if the over-the-counters aren't working for you.

Speaker 47 So talk to your doctor and they might prescribe you Voquesno.

Speaker 33 What are the symptoms?

Speaker 36 How did you know that you were dealing with it?

Speaker 47 You know, the typicals, like burping up acid late at night, you know, sleepless nights, stomach discomforts, stuff like that, just an acidy feeling in the throat.

Speaker 47 And yeah, it was starting to, you know, affect my work and stuff like that.

Speaker 47 Because if I'm not rested, you know, that's just more stress on top of stress or I, you know, would blow my voice out a lot easier.

Speaker 47 And, you know, that's just not helpful because I don't know if people really know, but before SNL comes on, I sing the warm-up song.

Speaker 47 You know, we warm up the audience or whatever, but I sing like a full song out and I do that twice a night and then have to do the show.

Speaker 47 So sometimes, yeah, you can hear it, you know, you can hear that my voice is like a little hoarse or raspy or crackling.

Speaker 47 And a lot of that was probably due to like, you know, an acid reflux situation happening. But

Speaker 30 I'm sorry, is it always the same song? And what song is it?

Speaker 47 It has been the same song for a while. We've switched it up a couple times, but we keep coming back to this song.
It's Give Me Some Loving.

Speaker 47 You know that song? I don't know.

Speaker 45 Who is that?

Speaker 47 Ever be here dang. Doo doo doo.
Spencer Davis group. I watch that.

Speaker 30 Hearing you sing that reminded me of a question that we had from earlier in the show. And I would like your ruling on this.
So we have a situation at this show when someone says something braggy.

Speaker 30 We have a sounder that we play that

Speaker 48 here's one

Speaker 30 okay, and so that's around.

Speaker 30 We use that when someone says something braggy, and then they introduce this for no particular reason, but because they wanted to differentiate between certain types of braggers.

Speaker 5 And I want to know: is this okay or nah?

Speaker 46 Look at me, be royal.

Speaker 39 That face, I feel like, tells me.

Speaker 15 Did you hear it? He put gravel in that voice, right?

Speaker 43 He put gravel in it, and then the name. Thumbs up, thumbs down from Keenan Thompson.

Speaker 47 Yeah. That is what it is.
You know what I'm saying? You can't act like there ain't no Leroy's out there.

Speaker 45 You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 47 You can kill Leroy's in the world. But it definitely made me laugh.

Speaker 33 I feel like

Speaker 36 we're trying to put rules around it.

Speaker 47 Cultures that brag, that's kind of interesting. I don't think you need it.
I think you're fine with the first one or whatever. Or one or the other.

Speaker 47 Yeah, I don't think you need to differentiate the two.

Speaker 33 Yeah, it's been the general consensus.

Speaker 47 That's hilarious.

Speaker 22 What's the number one food that will send you to Tummy Ache City with your GERD?

Speaker 47 Yeah, back in those days,

Speaker 47 it definitely was like, you know, late night pizzas and stuff, like spicier marinaras or spicier kind of foods.

Speaker 47 On top of like sodas, like, yeah, when I was in my bad, you you know, health, you know, diet-making choices, decision-making error or whatever,

Speaker 47 yeah, I was drinking a lot of sodas, you know, eating late. Uh, and yeah, a lot of like tomato saucy kind of like high-acidy kind of foods, basically, for me.

Speaker 47 So, yeah, those are all triggers that were not necessarily great without any sort of health or protection.

Speaker 1 What are the nights at SNL with the best spread? Is it after the main show? Is it the writing nights? What's the spread looking like around SNL?

Speaker 47 Oh, the spread is fantastic every every single day man snl it's just oh it's it's a it's first class all the way first class all the way man um talk to me slow about it

Speaker 47 there's a lot of snacks out there you know um

Speaker 47 there's snacks near the table read

Speaker 47 you know there's meal breaks when we have rehearsal and stuff like that there's a whole commissary so you know you just gotta make better choices basically that's that was my kind of journey just make better choices of all the um guests that you guys have had who has been the most fun and for you to work with?

Speaker 47 That's tough, you know, because like there's so many of them that are so great, you know what I mean. Like, any old cast member that comes back to do the show is always fantastic.

Speaker 47 Tom Hanks is always incredibly delightful, like Meryl Streep was surprisingly, like, insanely cool with everybody.

Speaker 47 Um, Dave Chappelle has a good time, like you know, Chris Rock has a good time, like anybody that comes.

Speaker 45 Look at me, Leroy,

Speaker 33 you You earned that one, yeah.

Speaker 47 Yeah, it's starting. That one's starting to run me wrong, so maybe go back to it

Speaker 47 because that's not my name.

Speaker 36 Exactly, that's the point.

Speaker 36 My cousin's name, but still,

Speaker 42 no, your cousin.

Speaker 30 I thought your cousin was G-Roy.

Speaker 33 Yes, G-Roy and Leroy are twins, man.

Speaker 47 It is. Are you serious? I'm serious.

Speaker 36 Yeah,

Speaker 15 still got your stride.

Speaker 33 This is what we're I'm talking about, Keenan.

Speaker 47 They just

Speaker 33 playing a bunch of people.

Speaker 47 Shout out to the G-Roy and Leroy, man. That's living life.

Speaker 33 Yes, I mean,

Speaker 33 this is what the culture of black people in America is.

Speaker 30 Nah, tell them the rest, though. Tell them how...

Speaker 45 That's standing on business.

Speaker 47 That's standing on business.

Speaker 47 I'm G-Roy.

Speaker 19 The G, bro.

Speaker 30 Tell them how everybody else in your family's name starts with an A.

Speaker 33 I don't think that that's weird. Okay, so Keenan, I have...

Speaker 6 Do you have siblings, Keenan?

Speaker 33 A bunch of siblings, and they all start with the letter A. And my parents start with A's, and all of our kids start with A's.

Speaker 33 And then some of their kids also all start with A's, and they think our family is strange for that.

Speaker 47 No, I just think y'all are dedicated. That's all.

Speaker 47 Y'all dedicated to the A. I'm dedicated to the A and being from Atlanta, so I feel you.

Speaker 44 Yeah, we both

Speaker 6 two up, two down, piece up, two down. Is that what it is?

Speaker 17 Oh, you're from Ohio, man.

Speaker 47 A-tailed hole, man.

Speaker 36 My bad. I'm still learning.

Speaker 46 Two up, two down. That's all right, though.

Speaker 45 All right, I got a question.

Speaker 37 Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 33 It's like a football call.

Speaker 44 All right, you are the longest-running cast member in SNL history.

Speaker 33 Such a legendary story.

Speaker 30 I've been trying to hold him back, Keenan. He was so excited.
I was.

Speaker 46 I'm going to interview you.

Speaker 17 I'm so excited.

Speaker 20 I'm going to just tell you.

Speaker 43 Big Keenan fan.

Speaker 44 He raised me in this comedy. All that.

Speaker 27 You don't know how many nights he just.

Speaker 30 So how do you feel about you? Got a chance to speak to this guy that you really respect and admire, and you just said, and he's from Atlanta, and you just said to him, two down, two up, two up.

Speaker 27 Hey, man, I ain't from there.

Speaker 37 I feel like we should all understand that, you know,

Speaker 27 you try to fit in, you try to just, you try to find that commonality.

Speaker 6 But ushers, yeah, was it pretty in a skin?

Speaker 27 You know what I'm saying? You just, I'm just trying to get past that.

Speaker 19 My bad, my bad.

Speaker 17 Apologies.

Speaker 5 Peace is just

Speaker 47 all right. So

Speaker 46 two up, two down.

Speaker 37 My question, Keenan.

Speaker 44 What is your favorite sketch that you've done?

Speaker 31 This is SNL or all that.

Speaker 33 Like, what is the favorite, your favorite sketch of all time that you've been a part of?

Speaker 47 Man, that's tough.

Speaker 17 Black Jeopardy?

Speaker 47 That's tough. Yeah, that I'm really bad at favorites.
Okay, I'm gonna go disclaim that right now.

Speaker 40 Which the least favorite

Speaker 47 Least favorite is any one of them that got cut because that does not feel good. Yeah

Speaker 47 But there's a lot of good ones man that like it's it's hard to like put what's up with that over Black Jeopardy over scared straight over super dude over principle pimpel You know what I mean?

Speaker 47 It's just like I have you know affinities for all of them. You know what I mean? Because, you know, you're putting yourself out there.
You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 47 And like, you want people to receive it well. So if it goes well, it's like, I'm going to leave it there.
I don't necessarily need to pick favorites.

Speaker 30 So many clients.

Speaker 33 Were there any sketches that you that got cut that you're like, yo, to this day, that should have been in the show?

Speaker 47 I mean, I had one, but we definitely got our get back. And it actually went into the show.
So that was good. It was this sketch called Active Jack, where it was like a

Speaker 47 PBS kind of show in the 70s about a guy that was like getting kids excited about working out. And it was like a long theme song basically.

Speaker 47 And I think the first time was Bruno Mars. So he was like, come on, kids, let's get active.
And he sing a song about doing push-ups or whatever.

Speaker 47 And then it was like the 50-year anniversary of that show. So they were doing like a reboot or something.
So then it was me as the active jack dude singing a song.

Speaker 47 A lot more tired and less enthusiastic.

Speaker 47 But it got cut. And then years later, Kevin Hart came and made it on the show.
so i got that

Speaker 33 that's dope that's dope my favorite sketch i think got cut was the other cavaliers it's a sports show so the other other cavaliers was the the the sketch around all the other guys around lebron when he was on that 2018 run i'm talking like that might be my favorite sketch of all time and i think online it did something crazy like 100 million views so People also agree that that sketch was hilarious and mad that it didn't make the show.

Speaker 47 It is. Like I'm laughing right now.

Speaker 4 Yeah, that was great.

Speaker 1 I think Dan has a question.

Speaker 43 What is the worst part of the life?

Speaker 47 Of what life, of my life?

Speaker 1 That is. That's just another thing we've been playing because Dan asked a terrible question to a NASCAR driver last week, and that was the question.
So we've been playing it for all our guests.

Speaker 47 GERD?

Speaker 47 Life of being a famous person or the life of having GERD?

Speaker 33 I think they all apply.

Speaker 47 Yeah, they all apply. The worst part, I don't, you know, I don't know.
Like, it's, it's hard to say.

Speaker 47 Like, that makes you feel sad because then, you know, you're actually pinpointing what the worst part of it is.

Speaker 47 But yeah, I don't know. I don't, I'm thankful for it all, honestly, because, you know, if it's, you know, something difficult, then it's a lesson.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 47 And if it's something great, then it's a blessing. So like, I don't know.
I'm just taking it all in stride as it comes. I'm just happy to be alive, man, because so many people aren't.

Speaker 47 Like, if you read the news, it's almost like every single day we're losing a legend, you know? So that's real. I'm just glad to be here, dog.

Speaker 33 That's real.

Speaker 36 But you don't look any older than you did when you were in all that, which is a blessing.

Speaker 33 And

Speaker 33 that's pretty crazy. Have you ever had a celebrity?

Speaker 5 See, we back.

Speaker 36 We back.

Speaker 43 Me and my dog, we back.

Speaker 33 Have you ever had a celebrity upset at how you played them on SNL?

Speaker 33 Confront you. Yeah.

Speaker 47 Not necessarily confront me because they can't find me. They can't see me out here like that.

Speaker 45 Okay, that's smart.

Speaker 46 That's smart.

Speaker 47 But I've definitely heard from people. You know, Steve Harvey called me in the beginning and he was like, hey, slow that down.

Speaker 33 Slow that down.

Speaker 37 It's such an old black man way to say, relax, little young man.

Speaker 47 I think Star Jones was mad about it back in the day, you know.

Speaker 47 And I understand it, you know, because when I was younger, I was definitely a little more dismissive of how people might.

Speaker 47 take my impressions of them just thinking that you know i'm just a kid i'm just doing impressions whatever it's no big deal um but I've grown to understand what would upset people about being impersonated.

Speaker 47 So I try to do it in a much more

Speaker 47 positive version, even if I am poking fun at them.

Speaker 22 Were any French people upset with Pierre S. Cargot back in the day?

Speaker 47 I don't think so. I think they just loved it because it was so silly.
You know what I mean? It's just a guy in his bathtub speaking fake French. That's all.

Speaker 33 There's definitely a couple of characters from all that that you could not bring back in this day and age.

Speaker 47 I think we all just there's a few of them yeah i'm sure there's you know several things that haven't aged well you know what i mean but yeah in in the moment it's it is what it is like part of the game i don't personally go out in in malice you know i i usually go out in fun basically so in that fun i feel like if we step on a toe it's more so accidental than anything yeah that's comedy i also love your kendrick perkins impersonation.

Speaker 39 I think that is the best in all of sports comedy.

Speaker 33 And it actually baffles me that that's not Kendrick every time I hear it first before I see it on the screen.

Speaker 47 Thank you. Shout out to Kendrick, man.
He's such a good dude. And yeah, he's been very supportive of the impression, you know, the whole time.

Speaker 47 So it's just fun to have those people that have those audible things. So when I start doing it, you know, people know who it is right away.
It was just a lot of fun.

Speaker 30 I think the athletes and people in sports media aren't like Steve Harvey level celebrities.

Speaker 6 So we excited.

Speaker 30 Stephen A, I feel like is excited when he get when someone impersonate him. Kendrick, I'm sure, is also excited because it's like, oh, y'all, it's always funny.

Speaker 24 It's like, oh, shit, they actually do be watching this too.

Speaker 17 Yeah, because we are hating.

Speaker 24 I'm like, damn, Kendrick got an impersonation person now.

Speaker 28 Damn.

Speaker 15 I got to get my. But you have my bad.

Speaker 30 Keating can probably help us with this. When you're figuring out impersonations,

Speaker 30 I assume you're looking for something distinct. But I feel like I'm looking at you, Hulk, like, I don't know.

Speaker 36 I think you've got enough there.

Speaker 30 No, it's not that you've got enough, but Kendrick Perkins obviously has very distinct

Speaker 15 matters of speaking.

Speaker 30 I was on with him a couple weeks ago, and he was doing exactly. It took everything in me, Keenan, not to laugh because my man was talking about what his grandmama told him.

Speaker 43 And I was like, man, you know, now you're doing an impersonation of a man doing an impersonation.

Speaker 47 100%.

Speaker 47 And I mean, it's a mixed bag of both of those things. Like

Speaker 47 what I feel like I can do, like vocal-wise.

Speaker 47 wise and then also what's the immediate register for the audience to know who I'm doing and and when and and why basically could I add so is there when you were going figuring out Kendrick Perkins as a character

Speaker 47 I guess I was wondering how do you even determine that this is something that you want to caricature because it wasn't as if it was like so he's so in the news that you're like we got to do something about this when do you notice whether you're just watching sports center or did someone or seem just watching ESPN or did someone mention it to to you how did it come to be yeah no I mean I've been on Kendrick Perkins for years you know what I'm saying but it just takes a while for him to get onto the radar of everybody else so like by the time I do it people know who I'm doing like I remember I did Steve Harvey on SNL when he still had hair and the audience didn't really know who he was yet like that and he wasn't just like you know

Speaker 47 In the house, you know, he just wasn't in the living room necessarily on a daily basis like he is on Family Feud.

Speaker 47 So once he got on Family Feud and everybody knew knew who he was and everybody could see what kind of a big character that he naturally is, you know, like

Speaker 47 I was, I was able to do it. You know, it's just kind of like that perfect storm of awareness basically.

Speaker 30 I'm going to work on my Hawk impersonation.

Speaker 4 No, I already did it. I did it earlier.

Speaker 45 Two up. And where's Dan?

Speaker 47 Do you know where Dan is?

Speaker 30 No one knows where Dan is, man. Dan running around here.

Speaker 47 to come here.

Speaker 30 Yeah, he in LA running around doing foolishness. Stu gotten not here either.
We're not even sure if Stu is still alive. We ain't seen Stu in forever.

Speaker 30 It's chaos out here, bro.

Speaker 26 Keenan, I have a question.

Speaker 12 What would you have said?

Speaker 25 Like,

Speaker 9 you're blessed to have this really long career in entertainment, but if I pulled you aside on the set of all that, and I said, you know, 25 years from now, you're going to be doing interview hits on behalf of GERD.

Speaker 33 How do you think that worked out for you?

Speaker 47 Yeah, I mean, I would first ask you, why are you standing?

Speaker 47 Why do you feel like you need to be the one to stand up?

Speaker 47 But yeah, no, I mean, I'm out here speaking on GERD to try to help others.

Speaker 47 So, you know, I would definitely be fine with that if my younger self would be like, oh, you're out on talk shows in the future talking about GERD. It's like, why?

Speaker 47 It's like, well, you actually had it and overcame it and you wanted to share your thoughts on that with other people that might be suffering as well and not know. I'll be like, oh, okay, that's cool.

Speaker 43 Incredible, incredible dismount.

Speaker 46 A way to crossover off the backboard.

Speaker 5 The pros do.

Speaker 22 That's why he's one of the greats.

Speaker 46 Thank you so much, Keenan.

Speaker 36 Give it up. Keenan Thompson.

Speaker 22 One of my favorites of all time.

Speaker 30 We appreciate it. Thank you so much, Keenan, for coming in and making at least one of my interviews go well.
Thank you, sir.

Speaker 47 Hey, man.

Speaker 47 I hope that the rest of them do, but you never know. Yeah, they've got

Speaker 33 two up, two down, Keenan.

Speaker 47 Two up, two down, always.

Speaker 36 My boy.

Speaker 47 All right. Represent.

Speaker 30 Oh, man. That was so much fun.

Speaker 19 I knew it would be. You were great, man.
Thank you.

Speaker 6 I was excited, bro.

Speaker 30 This is like when

Speaker 30 Jason Tatum thinks he's going to be the MVP, but Jalen Brown, like, nah, bro.

Speaker 30 I had came in here all hype was like, yeah, I'm going to cook today. But really, just rode the back of the 40 under 40, 50 under 40, all the lists of Andrew Hawkins.

Speaker 33 I don't know a lot, right? But I know what I know. So there's no prep.

Speaker 33 When Keenan Thompson comes on, I don't don't know about everyone knows listens i don't know everything and if i don't know i have no problem telling you that but when keenan comes in oh i am a phd level at keenan thompson that was sketches textbook on how not to start an interview yeah it was pretty bad but i also i also closed i i closed the post oh the morgan wild

Speaker 19 you got it was a bad

Speaker 17 i thought that was really funny yeah i thought so too i don't know it's funny but it's just a little jarring when it's the first words he hears i try to be too comfortable at the end too like i just wanted to say gerd like it's you know, it is something that's a funny word.

Speaker 32 I understand it's an affliction.

Speaker 12 He went serious with it and then called me out for standing.

Speaker 19 Number one.

Speaker 17 Which he was right about, by the way.

Speaker 6 Why are you?

Speaker 26 You're definitely standing.

Speaker 50 Hand up. That's on me.

Speaker 22 We might get aggregated now since he, you know, you asked him about it, getting aggregating all the trades. Maybe they're going to pick up on his answer.

Speaker 16 Yeah, it was a pretty smart question.

Speaker 50 I mean, the N-word thing, like,

Speaker 11 yeah, very of the moment right now

Speaker 1 walked off the saw it at the game what happened there then we would might have been aggregated but then it became very clear that no one should listen to that we're trying to get our newsy clip and it's just like well thanks thanks dominique

Speaker 49 also he was next to like uh a very loud ac vent or he was on an airplane that's a pretty boss move to do an interview from an airplane yeah or the ac vent

Speaker 33 i said two up two down listen we all we don't come out every every shot you shoot isn't going to go in do we find out the do we find out the score now or in the post-game?

Speaker 50 Well, we gave up an empty net golden air or something.

Speaker 45 Wow.

Speaker 6 Oh, we're playing hockey now.

Speaker 17 Oh, we definitely lost.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I thought we were playing hockey the whole time.

Speaker 38 We were down by themes and everything. Yeah, we were down by two, and now we gave up the empty net.

Speaker 22 I thought we were playing baseball.

Speaker 33 I think a big issue with how we're scoring this is because we're not even on the same stage.

Speaker 28 That was our issue the entire time.

Speaker 19 I don't think the interview went bad, though.

Speaker 33 I thought that was a good interview.

Speaker 1 No, like by comparison, we bounced back to the earlier interviews.

Speaker 12 Yes, that was one of the good ones, ones, I guess.

Speaker 16 All right.

Speaker 33 It also may just be me being excited to talk to King Tony.

Speaker 32 I thought it was great. I was excited.

Speaker 30 Obviously, I'll prepare better for interviews in the future. I apologize.
Hand up.

Speaker 30 I'm going to go serious right now in order to make Mike uncomfortable because no matter what, the best part was when he ducked on Mike and Mike was standing up, trying to smile like he felt good, but it was uncomfortable.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 38 I had my regrets there.

Speaker 26 I was just trying to, you know, it was a funny question.

Speaker 19 About Gerd.

Speaker 44 It was.

Speaker 33 But also, he had Gerd, so he was kind of like

Speaker 33 he played it down the middle.

Speaker 33 But when you like, in retrospect, after he started to answer you, I'm like, oh, okay, I can see where he's going.

Speaker 12 He wanted to ask you to get double-edged sword to be afflicted with something so fun to say.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 48 Well,

Speaker 30 we got show awards coming up. We'll determine the final verdict on how things went today.

Speaker 48 And Chris, how are we doing?

Speaker 4 Find out next?

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