My Testicles & Peyote

All right, shall we?

Sure.

Oh, wait, what episode we got?

Probably the best one ever.

You're the host, so get your mind in the game.

I could probably do a little preamble.

Yeah,

get ready for the worst episode.

Oh, yeah.

This is episode nine.

Episode nine.

Episode nine.

The least exciting of all the apps so far.

If you were going to look at the titles of every app and choose one last,

this is it.

Something like that?

Yeah, something like that.

And this this is the last two of the year, right?

Yeah.

Season one.

Yeah, but we're going to reveal two big secrets in this episode, so really pay attention, you guys.

Yes.

Oh, gotcha.

I shouldn't say that's the end.

It's the end of the SNL season.

It's of the SNL season.

I understood.

Oh.

The best of the worst.

Welcome to another Lonely Island Seth Meyers podcast.

Hey, everybody.

It is episode nine of the Lonely Island and Seth Meyers podcast.

And I think we all agree if there's one to skip,

it's this episode.

We are not.

You guys are not.

I mean, my hands are clean.

Well, am I being too hard on it right out of the gate?

No, no, no, you're not.

We're going to talk about two different digital shorts.

I think it's very, very fair.

We're just talking about content-wise, what we're talking about is skippable.

Yeah.

Yeah, we might be interested in talking about it.

Yeah.

Right.

It remains to be seen.

It might be the best episode of the podcast.

Yeah, yeah.

That's true.

Possible.

But we are going talk about two different digital shorts that i am guessing even if you're a hardcore lonely island fan you have not heard anyone talk about these since they aired correct they are in competition for the bottom they are in competition for the bottom and one of them has a real a-lister involved yeah so i want to start with that element of first of all we're rolling into the end of your first season on the show.

I do still think one of the things that's happening, not just for you guys, but the show in general, is there's an excitement building.

And one of the things that's really exciting is we have a series of really big-time hosts to close out the year.

And one of those hosts is Tom Hanks.

Now, I had at this point not worked with Tom Hanks.

This is the first time he'd been on the show since I had been on board.

You guys had obviously not worked with Tom Hanks.

And yet, not only do you know this guy from all his movies, both serious and funny, you know him to be kind of an all-time SNL host.

Definitely.

Yes.

And he's since proven that he has not aged out of that.

I mean, he probably has been in one of the biggest sketches of the last 10 years with David Pumpkins.

Definitely.

Absolutely.

So you feel like when Hanks is there, the digital shorts are in ascendancy.

I do remember he showed up down to do a digital short.

Yes.

Bless his heart.

He had kids who were at the age where they were hip to it.

Is it fair to say that we let down all our heroes on the show?

as you built this up seth my stomach was just dropping out for every part of this of just like what a disappointment we made well because we've covered steve martin yep that's right we let down steve martin and now we're here and i remember you know another one of the best snl hosts of all time is alec baldwin and this is pre-trump so it was still surprising even to have him on the show and it was like oh my god we're here for an Alec Baldwin episode and we didn't even get anything on the air in my recollection.

You mean more rare, not surprising?

Yes.

For us, it was more like, holy shit.

Yeah.

Yes.

And I just mean nowadays, it wouldn't be so surprising because he became a regular.

Agreed.

I think no matter how long you're at SNL, there are the two kinds of hosts you're excited for.

There's the one who you're there for their first SNL, and then it's a little bit weightier when you're there for their seventh, eighth, ninth.

They know the difference

because one of the things,

it's such a sugar high to host SNL.

That's true.

That sometimes, in a wonderful way, a host will have a dud episode, but they'll still be super psyched at the party because they don't know.

And it's not their fault.

They put their heart into it.

It's very rarely the host blew it.

Yeah, we get it.

We fucked up.

Do you want to say the title of the short?

Just to like really put a nail in the coffin?

Well, I like the fact that everybody's listening.

The massive fans of this podcast by episode 9 are like, wait, what is it?

How come I can't remember?

Well, they saw the title, but they have no clue what it is.

The hit digital short short sexy song.

Right.

Oh, that's better.

We were smart enough not to name it its title.

That's smarter.

On YouTube, it's called My Testicles.

Yeah.

My Testicles.

I thought it was going to be Please Don't Cut My Testicles.

Please Don't Cut My Testicles.

Yeah.

Did you guys watch it before we just started?

I did.

I did watch it.

I watched it recently independently of this podcast.

What?

I don't know why.

My memory, though, is so embarrassed that when I just watched it, if I could just jump to my experience,

it got lots of laughs laughs and I felt immense relief watching from most.

It played fine.

It played fine.

It played fine.

That's what I mean.

It played better than some things, better than the one we're going to talk about next.

I just hate the main joke so much.

It had tainted the whole thing.

There's lots of little color in there

of making fun of like Euro, English as a second language, you know, Swedish, Danish, where they make songs to cross over to the American market and they're saying kind of odd things.

I would also argue that the bookends are delightful.

Yes.

Forte Keenan and Parnell.

That's true.

Look great.

Yes.

I was so grateful at the end when he said he didn't like it.

I was right there with him.

At least we shit on it.

Yes.

We knew it wasn't good.

And that's a classic SNL move: bailing yourself out when you know your thing's not actually good enough by calling it out before anyone else can.

It's more than it's Tom Hanks, though.

Like just watching him have to do it.

It's such a drag.

Much like Steve Martin and Surf Meeting.

Yeah.

Tom Hanks, 110%.

Again, when you watch a host, especially one of great talents, not take their foot off the talent gas while they're speeding through a piece of turd.

A piece of turd.

It's fair.

If we hadn't already done the one with Natalie, I would have said, shame on him.

You know what I mean?

Like we had only to that point, before the Natalie one, only proven that we could make it work with us specifically doing it.

Yeah.

But then she came in and wanted to do a song and it ended up working really well.

So then it's like, he's not wrong to be like, well, shit, do that for me.

And us being like, oh my God, Tom Higgs is in our office.

Well, to be fair, it is also a direct parody, though, of a real song that we heard and were mimicking that no one knows.

I can't even remember.

Isn't it the, what is it, Wright Said Fred song, though?

No, no.

It's a song.

It's like an is it Israeli?

I think that's right.

Yeah, but what was it called?

I do remember it existing.

That our buddy sent to us.

It has a similar cadence.

I feel like there's that drum moment in this song, like,

which almost sounded exactly like

I'm too sexy.

Yeah, that's true.

And they're dressed like Wright Said Fred, too.

Like, we're taking obviously from all sorts of Euro pop stuff.

Of course, of course.

So I want to ask a question.

I feel like sometimes I'm looking at the script and it wasn't the script because it starts with New York City 1991, Forte, Keenan, Parnell, beautifully costumed to look like 1991 New Yorkers talking about new songs.

New Yorkers.

Was that like vanilla ice?

Forte is just literally vanilla ice.

You know, like the casual New Yorker in the 90s.

And I do feel like Keenan definitely is dressed like some Bay Area rapper that you guys liked, right?

I'd have to look at it again.

Yeah, hold on.

But was it always going to have that framing device?

Did you know that that was important?

I think so.

I think so.

Okay.

Oh, well, he's dressed like Dwayne Wayne.

He's even got Dwayne Wayne glasses from a different world.

Oh, right.

That's what it was.

So I guess that's like Atlanta, right?

Yeah, I guess so.

So they talk about there's this hot new song, Parnell holds up a boombox.

Always forget, Parnell, stronger arms than you think he's gonna have.

Also, forgot how big that boom box is.

We asked for the biggest boombox they could find and they delivered.

Yeah,

you guys ever heard that song by CNC Music Factory, Everybody Dance Now?

Yeah, that's pretty good.

Have you heard that Wright Said Fred song, I'm Too Sexy?

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's pretty good, too.

Sure, fellas, but have you heard the new song by Ariel and Ephraim?

No, who are they?

Check this out:

Morning in the kitchen.

You're frying and tank.

I'm squeezing some oranges.

The room is getting hot.

Over at the counter, I shake the salt.

You take out a knife.

Please don't cut my testicles.

Please don't cut my testicles.

Please don't cut my testicles.

Don't cut my testicles.

It's a nice day.

Relax.

Right at that moment when it transitions into the video and those drums that you were just singing, Seth, come in and you see it's on this infinite white psych and everyone's in leather and Polar's there and Maya's there and it's got a vibe and you realize, oh my God, it's Tom Hanks in there.

Expectations just go through the roof.

Even I found myself in this rewatch like, okay, whoa, whoa.

Like I'm in the presence of greatness.

I might be witnessing a classic unfolding.

Yes.

And I think that helps you because the audience feels that way.

I will say it's very fun to watch you and Hanks share the screen, Andy, because I remember, especially because you're wearing a bald cap, you look more like you do now than you did then.

You actually, whoa.

I just mean that your hair, Andy still has a wonderful head of hair.

Thank you for clarifying that.

But you looked young all the time because of your explosive head of hair for that first year.

Yeah, your ragamuffin style.

And now you kind of look like a co-star of Tom Hanks's.

Akiva, I think the audience is just like you.

They're like, we're watching a classic.

The song is so short, they don't have time to realize they're not.

Okay, well, that's good.

That's the first compliment you've given.

The one thing I'll say outside of the bookends that I really liked is that we get out so fast.

I was so relieved when it ended where I was like, oh, well, at least it's just that.

Like it just signals to everyone, we knew we weren't sitting on something that we thought was great.

It's weirdly two verses, and I was very surprised it was over.

But then I thought, knowing you guys like I know you, I knew that that was not an act of laziness.

That was an act of shame.

Hatred.

Hatred and shame.

You know what else?

Other little things?

Let's talk about little things we like.

Okay, great.

I liked how I pronounced often.

Yeah.

Often.

Often.

I love that.

I did like that.

I do.

I worry often.

I like that.

I love Parnell very plainly explaining that I guess some really like horrific things had happened to their testicles.

I like that too.

And obviously I loved him saying, I got to go hit the skins with a tenderoni.

Tenderoni.

Yeah, out of 5,000.

I wish

that I had had that info about the testicle trauma earlier.

Yeah.

I was like, somehow I wish someone could have just told me that so I would have understood.

But then you wouldn't have liked that line so much, though.

If in the preamble he goes, oh, like Ariel Nephraim, have you heard that?

And they're like, no, who's that?

And they're like, oh, there's these two guys that make great dance music, but apparently they had horrible things happen to their testicles.

Check it out.

But I'm sure they didn't talk about it in a song.

Why would they?

Would that have helped?

No, it wouldn't have.

I think it's better that it landed where it landed.

there's no right way to have done it i think no no hit the skins with a tenderoni can you guys just for those because i barely understood it well hit the skins is have sex yeah yeah it just means to knock boots yeah no but what era of hip-hop is using that early 90s like grandpuba said it a lot okay gotcha and then tenderoni i mean it was popularized by bobby brown skins was everywhere though like it's in boys in the hood right where he's like you're gonna give me the skins or what like when he's on the phone yeah and his mom's still on the other line And Tenderoni got shortened to Roni a lot.

Yeah, there's a Bobby Brown song just called that.

And what about Audi?

Do we know the first usage of Audi 5000 or who?

We'd have to Google that.

I will say the most fun thing, of course, is feeding that through the Parnell robot.

Yes.

Well, we knew that.

Yeah.

That's just what it was like in 91.

Everyone talked like that.

I also appreciated that we didn't care that there were cars and people in the background that showed it was clearly now.

We could have just turned the camera towards a wall and it could have been 1991, but we didn't.

I actually do non-sarcastically like that because it lets you know that we're just having fun and went out with some costumes.

The stakes were decidedly not high.

Right.

We may have looked at each other and been like, yeah, it's fine.

So the shortness of the song, does that mean that you guys knew there were fundamental problems in the writing of it?

When do you know we got to get in and out of this because it's not sustainable?

I think in the writing phase.

Gotcha.

We always are cutting things short.

We've talked about it before.

That's like kind of a staple of our things is trying to cut things as short as they can be.

Yeah.

And the dumber the joke, the faster you tell it, I think.

Yeah.

Just in general.

I should note another thing I like about it is as a young man, especially in that sort of Robert Palmer video thing, I like that icy, cold, European look of the women in the sketch.

Yes.

Like, I like the severe haircuts on Maya and Polar.

Fred has a nice moment.

Didn't Fred's character have a name?

Did he?

I feel like it was like little Johnny or something.

Oh, yeah, Little Frankie.

Little Frankie.

Why did he have a name?

Because he's, oh, because he's tiny, because we keep shrinking him and putting him in different spots in the video.

Oh, my God.

But I also thought it was like while we were shooting, maybe Amy and Maya were calling him that.

I might be wrong.

And then, Yarma, you appear in this one as well.

It's nice to see me, young Gur.

Yeah.

I basically look the same, right?

Well, it's funny when you think back to there were a few times at SNL sketches, I had my shirt off and I was so nervous about it.

Yeah.

And then the key is you just get like 20 years older and you look back and you're like, fuck yeah.

What I would give.

What I wouldn't give.

So Kevin pulled from Urban Dictionary about Audi 5000, but I have a question right off the bat.

It spells it Audi, like O-U-T-I-E.

Yeah.

Oh, I would never have spelled it like that.

Isn't it Audi, like the car?

That's what I, yeah, I assumed it was the car, too.

Because isn't that the whole thing?

Because it means to leave, to be gone.

And so I thought that that's the car.

Whoever invented the thing, it was like saying, and I'm Mercedes-Benz, and like, I'm out of here.

No, I believe it's like, I'm out.

It's an extension of I'm out.

But then why the 5,000?

I'm out is I'm out, but it should be Audi 5,000.

And I guess you could spell like the word out, like O-U-T-E-I-E, like this thing is.

Like, it's giving it to Ice Cube saying, so at 10 p.m., I was Audi 5,000, meaning I'm out.

It left.

Maybe it's that sort of cockney near rhyme where it is based on Audi 5,000, but you say Audi.

Okay, but now he's got it for Audi 5000 spelled the right way.

There's a car that is the Audi 5000.

Of course.

Oh, well, then it's definitely that.

Yes.

The answer is people would always say, and I'm out.

And then at one point, someone said, I'm Audi 5000 because of the car.

Exactly.

Yes.

So I would spell it like the car.

It's wordplay.

And it's very cool for us to talk about it.

I would say I'm Honda Accord.

No, you'd always be like, I'm Audi belly button.

Oh, right.

Right.

Because that's how you want to spell it.

I've tried and failed once in stand-up to say that if I could meet meet one person living or dead, it would be the first person who said, no shit, Sherlock.

I mean, it seems like you're just saying you'd like to meet Watson.

The IBM computer.

That's right.

The chess-playing IBM computer.

You guys are a pretty, I don't know, kind audience to me.

And it was heartbreaking how like I once tried to stand up it and all of you were like, huh?

Just dead silence.

Well, was there more to it?

Like, you didn't even like the premise.

I do like the premise.

I just had the next line for it.

We have more of a writer's room mentality.

We were more pitching around.

It was punching.

Exactly.

Writer's room mentality.

You should understand that.

You know, I think in general, too, like looking through this run list for Hanks, and again, I mean, you guys know I have always referred to our era as an golden era.

Right.

But this was not, this probably doesn't crack Hanks's top seven.

I mean, he's hosted, what, like 12 times or something?

Yeah.

And he said some real barn burners.

And we did not, in general, come through for him.

You're just looking down the rundown and seeing nothing memorable.

I'm just kind of looking down the rundown, and it's sort of an absence of.

But is it possible if the whole rest of the show was fucking fire and this sketch was in it, that it actually would have taken it out of the top seven anyway?

This digital short.

Would have just taken it out.

I don't think it could have elevated it.

I think in general, we just didn't have it this week.

Ooh, I see in cut after dress digital short, lobster claw and handlebar.

Like

haunting.

It haunts the rest rest of the season.

It's the phantom of the season.

By the way, did any of you ever see The Phantom of the Opera on Broadway?

No.

Regrettably, no.

I never did either.

And my wife, who loves it, got tickets.

It's last week.

And she said, do you want to go?

And I said, no, I don't need to go.

And so she took her family because they were all in town.

And they, as a family, had seen it a bunch of times.

So they went.

And then she was talking to me afterwards.

And I realized she was talking to me with the assumption that I had seen it.

And I said, I've never seen it.

And she was so mad that I hadn't mentioned that when I said, I'm not going to go.

I'm with her, I think.

I would leap at the opportunity this week to see it after 30 years, knowing it's the last chance.

I thought you were going to say she couldn't believe you had mentioned that when you said, I do.

And you guys were at my wedding and she made me get married wearing that half a mask.

Yeah, and you just went with it, not even knowing what it was.

You saw some freak shit.

I was very excited.

When we were kids and that show started, we lived in the Bay Area.

We were nowhere near Broadway.

We never went to shows.

We had very few even albums in the house, and they bought that soundtrack and it was on all the time.

So I know every song the way that I think people listen to Hamilton now who I've never seen Hamilton and it's kind of the easy way to get a taste.

We had Les Miz, but we went and saw it as a family.

Got it.

It so surprised me knowing your mom and how sarcastic she is, Keith, that's very shocking to me.

She might have been listening to it ironically because it is a goofy ass musical.

They just wanted to take down Weber, you know?

It's like real Cynthia.

Yeah, that's the dope stuff.

That's the part that I've always had a problem with.

And I have nothing but respect for Phantom and the work they did.

Yeah.

Very synthy.

But it was of the time when it came out.

Yeah, but it was this week when I got invited.

Did they update it with all like new drums and stuff?

I don't know.

I'd be mad if they did.

Yeah.

Yeah, you don't want new drums.

Yoram, do you remember Tennis Partners that you wrote with Forte?

I watched it again because I thought I was going to be asked this question and barely, but I think it was one of those very late night forte writing sessions where you're like, he's doing the circling a paragraph over and over again.

One of those.

Yep.

And you're just like, God,

please end this.

But it came together.

So the 10-to-1er.

Have we talked about 10 to 1 as a premise yet here on the podcast?

Not sure.

Just do a brief one.

We don't know.

10 to 1 is the last sketch of the night.

So it's 10 to 1 in the morning.

And the perfect use of 10 to 1 is a piece of very unique writing that is not going to be a laugh a minute, but for a certain kind of SNL purist who stays till the end every week and admires and appreciates the slightly out there choices, it is a reward to them.

I feel like that's when it's used the best.

You never see, for example, a game show or a talk show sketch at 10 to 1.

Ideally, those sort of serve a role earlier.

And this forte really was the king of 10 to 1 for a great many years on the show.

The absolute king.

McKay and Farrell were the previous kings of that, I would say.

Yeah.

And 10 to 1, it's called tennis partners.

And I'm just going to blast through the very simple premise of this sketch, which is Will and Tom used to be tennis partners, and Tom had an accident, and now he only has one arm.

Richard, I have some rather bad news to tell you about our tennis partnership.

Richard, I'm sorry to say I think we're going to have to call it quits.

Well, that's what he's saying.

Listen, we've had so so many great years together, and I just think we're moving in different directions, tennis-wise.

Oh, is this because of the accident?

Oh, uh, did you have some sort of an accident?

Well, yeah, actually, pretty benchmark.

Actually, I came out of it minus one arm.

Oh, Richard wasn't aware of that real sorry to hear that.

Well, I'm kind of surprised you didn't notice.

Are you sure this has nothing to do with the loss of my dominant planning arm?

No, nothing to do with the arm, just indifference of tennis philosophies.

Really?

Differences.

And Will has a new tennis partner because he doesn't want to play with a one-armed player.

And it's Parnell who has three arms.

And then Tom raises the stakes because his new tennis partner is Bill, who has seven arms.

And that I've just described to you is a perfect 10-to-1 practice.

And they're talking like this the whole time.

Ah, I see.

Yeah.

Sounds good.

Yeah.

It's also short, too.

It feels like a 10-to-1 that was also cut down a little bit for time, too.

Yeah, there's a lot of big cuts.

This is a real forte two-line exchange.

Seven-arm Toby Slaven, I thought you retired.

Retired?

Hardly.

I was lured away by a very lucrative offer from Alaskan Fishing Cantery, who believed, and rightly so, that I could do the job of three and a half men.

Ten years later, I'm back in tennis.

I just so appreciated that the math is right, that he has seven arms so he can do the work of three and a half men.

They rightly assumed he could do the work.

Rightly so, yeah.

Rightly so is the best part for me.

This is a real wonderful forte flourish.

Parnell, his new partner, is giving Hanks, his old partner, shit for only having one arm.

And Parnell says, we'll be waiting for that day.

It'll be the same day.

You grow a new dominant playing arm.

And then Will says, at bay, Skip, at bay.

It's good.

It's really good.

There is something interesting about a forte sketch, and this happened a couple times when writing with him, where when you would go to a rewrite with a normal sketch, you could be there for a while because anyone can pitch on it.

And oftentimes, if you went in with a forte sketch, people would kind of look around and be like, huh?

And there would not be much of a punch-up because the logic was so forte, it was very difficult to find your way in.

So rewrite tables on Thursday, and I greatly enjoyed my Thursdays.

And as head writer, I would sit at the head of the table and you'd have about seven other writers at the table.

And then Forte would come in for, say, 45 minutes to an hour, and you'd pitch jokes on it.

And the nice thing with Forte was knowing that exactly what you just said, you are.

So you'd only maybe give it 10 minutes.

You'd pitch a few things.

He would sort of dutifully write them down.

You would know that they would go right in the garbage and that was fine with everybody.

Immediately in the garbage.

He would nod like very appreciatively, though.

He was always kind about it.

Yeah, of course.

And whoever was on Forte's piece had hours and hours to go.

It wasn't like he was done working on it.

There was no value value to him in the sort of collective writing process.

I have a quick thing I want to talk about in relation to nothing.

Great.

This is in relation to a, I don't want to say drunk, but let's just say jovial FaceTime I got from Andy and Seth together.

And it was a rare time where they're together in the same room drinking a little whiskey together.

And it was delightful.

It was just delightful.

Andy and I had not seen each other for a long time and we went out for dinner and then he came back over to my apartment and we drank bourbon and we got we got old man wasted we got a little tripped out we started cold face timing bros

and what a treat to get a cold face time and just turn it on and two guys in one square together

yeah

we then i have still photos because then we made you watch some stuff where we were facetiming and then you were watching stuff on your computer and i was taking screenshots of your face while you're watching things that's the sort of of thing you do when you're drunk.

All right, now we move on.

This is very exciting.

This is a return from a former cast member, a cast member who would straight up tell you to face they did not have the best time as a cast member on the show.

And I think this was a very triumphant return.

It was for me a really cool week to get to work with Julie Louis Dreyfus.

All right.

Yes, that was awesome.

Is an all-timer.

Yes.

And it was also a really cool week because

she was

very good at telling us how much nicer the vibe was.

And she was very funny talking about the things she was embarrassed about when she was there.

Like she came from a very theater background, and there was sort of half theater.

If you remember, she was there at a crazy time when you also had like the Billy Crystals of the world.

It wasn't even the Lorne time, it was the Dick Ebersoll time.

It was.

It was the Eversoll years.

So, despite all her massive successes, I should note, I think she's hosting for The New Adventures of Old Christine.

This is pre-Veep.

This is 2006.

And she comes in, and it was was so much fun to have her there.

She was the best.

She really was.

And it was a great episode, despite the fact that, again, it wasn't that memorable a digital short.

No, well, we've already covered this short a little bit because it was the one we did after Lazy Sunday.

We didn't shoot one that week.

Yeah, so there's no, Julie's not in it, and it is Peyote, which is sort of the follow-up to Lettuce that wisely didn't air as the follow-up to Lettuce.

So even though it does not make an impact here, the positive impact was the instinct not to make it the second digital short because now we put some air between it.

Now it sort of feels like a 10 to 1er, even though it's not.

No, it did.

Oh, you're right.

It is a 10 to 1er.

It was the final sketch of the night, which is a perfect place to put it.

And so it does not have the burden of being an early digital short.

And for those who enjoy the journey of digital shorts, Peyote is good time.

Yeah.

So Peyote comes from Samberg.

Do you guys sit down and say, is there another move in Lettuce to do a second Lettuce-y sketch?

I feel like it was also Forte's idea, wasn't it?

Yes, lettuce had worked out, and we went back to Forte, like, let's do it again.

What else you got, buddy?

And obviously, lettuce was the switcheroo, it was very depressed and very sad, and they're chewing on lettuce.

I think in this day and age, people wouldn't even do something that touches suicide, which is probably correct, but this was another time.

So, Andy stand against a brick building.

I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna jump.

Forte talking through a bullhorn.

You don't want to do this.

None of these people, I just want to see the freak jump, Sir, come on.

You know that's not true.

You don't understand.

Oh, come on, come on.

Whatever it is, we can talk about it.

I love her, man.

She broke my heart.

No one person is worth taking your life.

She was.

Just relax.

I'm done relaxing.

No, don't do it.

No otherwise.

And it intensifies, gets very dramatic, and then we cut to a wide, and they're right next to each other.

Classic cut to a wide.

Cut to wide.

Fun editing joke, that one.

Porte's on his knees.

Yeah.

Andy's feet are on the ground.

Yeah.

And we get a cameo of one of the best reoccurring characters we ever did.

Yorma as man on the street walking by.

Pedestrian Yorma.

Oh, I was very good at walking by.

That's how you know it's in the same series as Lettuce.

I got a compliment from Chester about my walking by.

And both of them, he was like, you really look like Joelle Santana when you walk by.

I was really proud of that.

Interesting.

Genuinely.

Not who I would have picked.

No.

But I love it.

Only Chester would say that.

Does the audience respond happily when they see the reveal?

Yeah, it gets a nice little laugh.

Honestly, Peyote gets a bigger laugh, which wasn't in the original script.

I think we added it when we were editing, and that was the only thing when we re-watched it that made me chuckle.

Of the drugs, it's pretty decent.

It's very unlikely to have an ad campaign.

Yeah.

I feel like Peyote doesn't feel like they're going to add market cap.

It's a simple premise done well, but amounts to very little.

Locale.

Very locale.

Perfect for the very end of the thing when most people are asleep.

Yeah, how long does it?

It's like a minute 10 or something, right?

I'm going to guess that's true.

Honestly, that's probably the main reason why it aired last, because it wasn't helping change a set.

Right.

Your sausage mcmuffin with egg didn't change.

Your receipt did.

The sausage mcmuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just $5.

Only at McDonald's for a limited time.

Prices and participation may vary.

Mike and Alyssa are always trying to outdo each other.

When Alyssa got a small water bottle, Mike showed up with a four-liter jug.

When Mike started gardening, Alyssa started beekeeping.

Oh, come on.

They called a truce for their holiday and used Expedia Trip Planner to collaborate on all the details of their trip.

Once there, Mike still did more laps around the pool.

Whatever.

You were made to outdo your holidays.

We were made to help organize the competition.

Expedia, made to travel.

I think one of the nice things about the success of the digital shorts is, again, I'm extrapolating out based on nothing, why a lot of people got behind them, is you guys were never eating up a huge chunk of the show.

If somebody's writing a recurring piece that's seven minutes every other week, that's really taken away time from other people.

But you guys were capped out at like 2.20.

Sometimes you'd come in at 1.15.

Nobody could be upset.

Also, it never took away from anyone's live piece because there always had to be a pre-tape piece in the spot we were in.

Yeah.

50 seconds.

Jeff just went and looked.

50 seconds.

That's that.

What was the number that we had to hit, though, to be able to change a set?

It was 145 or 150.

135 or 150.

I thought it was 150.

So if you made it something underneath that, Lauren would kind of like, thanks a lot.

Really doesn't help me.

Yeah.

He was like, it really helps me if you can make it 150 or longer.

But I think when he saw Peyote, he was like, no, 45 is about the right price.

He's like, that's okay.

That's fine.

He's like, just play it twice in a row.

Just play it twice in a row.

Like the hit.

People forget that's what makes Laurence a really good producer.

Remember, he would always be like, twice in a row?

Can we hop into Seth's Corner for a second?

Yes, please.

Seth's Corner, you're all invited.

Seth's Corner, it's happening right now.

Take it with it.

Okay, so I wrote a sketch called MySpace, and it was Andy.

Do you remember that you were the professor or the teacher in this sketch?

No.

Okay.

It was a Learning Annex, MySpace in You seminar.

You were a young man.

Oh, vague.

Yep, yep, yep, yep.

Yep.

You were teaching everybody how you could set up a MySpace page so you can communicate with more than 6 million young people currently in the MySpace community.

Let's get started.

This is a slightly older group than I'm expecting.

And it's in Julia, and then the rest of us are clearly pedophiles.

Jesus.

Well, I admit I'm not here to start my own MySpace page.

My daughter is spending all of her time on it, so I thought I should see what all this hullabaloo was about.

Okay, and the rest of you?

What she said?

Yeah,

landlady that said.

Fair enough.

Now the first step in creating your MySpace page is to fill out your profile, things like your name, sex, and age.

With the age thing, could my child put a different age than his actual age?

Yeah, I guess they could.

And MySpace doesn't have a way to police that?

Not really.

So if my son was

45, he could say he was 15.

Your son is 45?

I said if he was 45.

It's hypothetical.

It's a real good sketch.

It's fairly dark.

That is fairly dark.

And accurate.

And it aired.

It aired.

Here's my favorite memory of it.

In dress, do you remember who was in it that asked to get taken out of it?

No.

Somebody was in it playing a pedophile, got a giant laugh, and then between dress and air, thought better of it.

And that was musical guest Paul Simon.

He's like, that didn't feel like the right laugh for me.

He was great.

I was like, who are you going to say that would be okay with you saying that?

And I was like, oh, yeah, Paul Simon.

Yeah, yeah.

He wants everyone to know he pulled himself.

Yeah.

Again, I think one of the fond memories I have on it, and this is pre Odin Kirk breaking bad.

This is in my mind now, just Mr.

Show Odenkirk.

So somebody I really looked up to.

And Bill knew him.

And Bill came to my office and said, Odin Kirk asked who wrote that sketch.

Oh, that's wonderful.

That's nice.

Comedy, cool dude.

I mean, again, I feel like ultimately, did Paul Simon make the right choice?

I feel like he's pretty well regarded even today.

So ultimately, I think he did okay.

This was one of the first ones where I got asked to direct something for the show that wasn't one of our sketches because I did some parts of the monologue I didn't write that was like going out in the streets with Julia Louis Dreyfus.

And I remember having a great time and feeling kind of proud that I had contributed to the adult part of the show rather than just our little kid corner.

Yeah.

There's a sketch called Alien Encounter in this show.

And obviously, it's unfortunate that now there's, you know, obviously a historically great alien abduction sketch that Kate McKinnon did, but there was a sketch where Julia was in a TV movie where they were reenacting the alien abduction of Sandy Patterson, and the sketch just becomes a lot of wig walking in as the real Sandy Patterson.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Can we cut?

Can we just cut for a second?

Cut, cut.

I'm sorry.

I'm shocked.

What's the problem?

Oh, I really don't want to be a pain or anything, but that didn't really sound like an alien.

It was more sort of like a bunch of ghosts.

Well, that's what it sounded like.

That's what I heard.

I'm sorry.

I should have introduced you to earlier.

Michelle, this is the real Sandy Patterson.

That's what happened.

Those are the sounds I heard when they came for me.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean anything.

I just...

They were in my house.

All right, Sandy.

Michelle, let's just stick to the script, okay?

Oh, of course.

I'm really sorry.

It was horrible.

They were from space.

Of course, make it happen to you.

Of course.

It was a good show.

I'm reading Shaggy Dog.

Also, guest writing that week, John Glazer.

Oh, yeah, that was a good time.

And we wrote it with him, and it was super fun.

It's because we had for years, starting at this time, somebody was pranking our office and putting posters for things that we did not care about in our office.

And we would show up the new week of work, and there'd be, say, a poster for Disney's The Shaggy Dog starring Tim Allen.

And then the next week we'd show up, and there was like, was it Alan Iverson or something else, some or like Reggie Miller, some other like sports poster up.

Is that how we got the Breakfast and Tiffany's poster as well?

Yes, every week we'd show up and there'd be a new poster that just kind of was meaningless to us.

And no one ever took the credit for this prank, for this long-running prank, but it did result in a shaggy dog sketch because we were staring at, if you recall, the poster also had, it had a dog, the shaggy dog, and then his eyes were Tim Allen's eyes.

So it was super creepy looking, weird Disney poster.

But this sketch, I have no recollection.

Yeah, it's Samberg and Glazer are the first two names, then Shaffer Taconi.

So it was us and John Glazer.

Anyway, it's a bad, bad sketch.

How did this even get to dress?

Well, then they start pitching other ideas.

Yeah.

On the plus side, I bet this got us to take the poster down in our office.

We didn't want to look at it anymore.

Because it was so embarrassing to have it up there after we wrote this.

You're like, well, we can't remember this now.

For the next five years, just the biggest movie, television, and music stars came through that office and would look at our collection of posters and go, huh?

this is where the magic happens?

They'd be coming into the guys who had made Dignabots.

It was everyone from Lady Gaga to Rihanna came in and saw that.

He does say something about you guys.

You appreciated the prank so much that you wouldn't take them down, even though you had that power every single turn.

Our office was like the shittiest dorm room that you've ever saw.

It was like the dorm room that I expected to have in college and didn't until SNL.

The guys that made Mother Lover love breakfast at Tiffany's.

These guys are really interesting.

And Reggie Miller.

Yeah.

All right.

So, gentlemen, we are now closing in on the end of your first season on the show.

You are then about to embark to Vancouver to shoot hot rod.

You've been balancing writing digital shorts with working on a script.

It's a very exciting time.

And I don't know if you guys, when it turns to spring in New York City, even now, I feel the way I felt when an SNL season is coming to a close, even though I'm not on that schedule anymore.

It just felt so nice to know, especially if it had been a good season.

It was so nice that it was a little bit lighter, a little bit later, and it just felt like the reward of getting through a long season.

And I felt that very much this year, that we had done a very nice job.

Testicles aside.

Yes,

there it is.

And I don't know if you guys heard me earlier, but lobster claw and handlebar did get cut again this week.

Yeah.

Oh, good.

Interesting.

Yeah.

The phantom of this opera for the rest of the season.

Throwing it back at you.

Oh, my God.

There's one more episode of SNL, correct?

Yeah, we have one more to go.

And we'll be back with that episode episode next week.

We'll see you next week, everybody, for episode 10 of the Lonely Island and Seth Meyers podcast.

Bye, gentlemen.

Bye-bye.

Bye.