Sky1 S1E7 - Peru (November 5, 2010)

The seven wonders of the world.

Christ the Redeemer.

The challenged Mahal.

The Great Pyramids.

Truly man's greatest achievements.

But there's one man who sees them differently.

If that was on my road, the council would be on it to go get that down.

It's a death trap.

Cow Pilking John.

Is Is this for the hunting or is she just a bit forward?

I don't know the politically correct term.

Moron,

I think.

He is a round, empty-headed, chimp-like mank moron.

Buffoon, idiot.

And he's a friend.

He's a typical little Englisher and he doesn't like going out of his comfort zone.

I just think it'd be amazing.

to send him around the world.

What we'd like to see is him experience other cultures, other peoples, and see if in any way we can change his outlook on the world.

I want him to hate it.

I want him to hate every minute of it for my own amusement.

Nothing is funnier than Carl in a corner being poked by a stick.

I am that stick and now I have the might of Sky behind me.

Shit!

Shit!

This is one of the funniest, most expensive, practical jokes I've ever done and it's going to be great.

Just let me go!

Jesus Christ!

First discovered by Western eyes in about 1911,

Machu Picchu in Peru.

Truly one of the seven wonders.

You must be very familiar with that.

Breathtaking.

I'm not I haven't heard of that.

Never heard of it.

Good view.

Good view, important.

Um bit out of the way.

It's accessible accessible by an 11-hour trek through the mountains.

That's not accessible, is it?

That's true.

That wouldn't cut the mustard on location, location, location, would it?

You can't live like that, can you?

You can't.

I mean, people moan at me, delivery drivers moan at me, just because I'm on a second floor.

So if you're up there, they're going to have a right whinge on by the time they get to you.

You don't seen that phase by the fact you've got to do an 11-hour trek?

I like a walk.

I'll probably see loads of better things on the way than I do when I get there.

Uh, camping.

Yeah, camping's alright, you know, I mean, it's quite relaxing.

You're out in the open air, quite like the idea of that.

The only thing that's annoying with camping

is uh

toilet situation.

Here, India hole in the ground.

It is better.

It can't possibly be better.

Why not?

In China, where I thought they're advanced, it still had a hole in the ground.

That's my main panic that I've had about this trip.

How am I going to do it in the woods?

I'll load this.

A little

camping chair.

It's got a little hole in it.

So it doesn't rip anymore, just put staples round it.

I don't know if that's a good idea or not, because I haven't had any bear art on it yet.

But it's only a quid.

Pop that up.

Sit there like that.

I can put my toilet roll in the drinks holder once I've used it a bit.

Looks alright, doesn't it?

I mean, it's the last one, isn't it?

It should be the easiest one because, in my head, I'm going, it's over now.

So, no matter how bad it gets, I think that will keep me going.

Not happy with this.

Seriously, not happy with this.

It's funny how the director's gotten a different one.

I'm not getting on this.

Why is it landing on water?

There's enough land here.

Chop some of the trees down.

There's shitloads of land.

Make another runway.

Why are we landing on this?

Thought we were just going to smachu Picchu.

I've got to go on a plane.

And apparently, there's smoke here.

Look, they've got the engine open look.

Is it easily sorted?

Fix it.

No.

You can't fix it.

Don't worry,

it's okay.

Bit of banging.

We get on it, met the captain, he's called George, which isn't a name that pilots normally have.

When you hear them on the speaker thing, it's normally the surnames they use and stuff, and it's sort of the posh sounding.

I've never heard, all right, George,

that's that isn't a pilot's name.

That's he doing

every time I looked over, he seemed to have his hand on something, and there's fellow next to him sort of grabbing it, going, don't do that, and he's sort of looking like what?

I think that's why they have doors on planes, so you can't see the captain.

It's nothing to do with security, it's just so you can't see the dev who's driving it.

because it puts you on edge, doesn't it?

And then I looked again, he's got butties out,

sat there having his lunch.

It's only an hour flight, have it before we go or when we get there.

So it's just little things like that that niggle me.

So, are we landing down there?

Rocking hell.

Boy,

you

Hello mate, Steve here.

I hope you had a good flight and everything and just wanted to let you know about a very slight change of plan.

Ricky and I were having a chat and we sort of agreed that it seemed a bit mad for you to go straight to Machu Picchu.

So we thought you could just sort of make your way there through the jungle.

You know what I mean?

Just follow the Amazon.

I think it's only about a thousand kilometers south to get to the wonder.

Obviously, you know, we wouldn't leave you stranded.

We've arranged for a local jungle guide called Will to look after you needs to sort you out with the place to stay and everything.

Again, as always, very jealous of you, my friend.

Hope you enjoy it.

Bye.

It just annoys me because they always say to me, oh, you always come across pissed off and all that, and people would love to do what you're doing.

But they wouldn't, because I'm constantly on edge.

They haven't slept for about 30-odd hours.

So.

You ever been to the jungle before?

No, but why would I?

Why would I go to the jungle?

I've never watched Tarzan.

I thought I'd like to go there on holiday.

He never looks great.

It's the last one.

I know, but that's what worries me.

It's the last one.

That's part of the problem, though, innit?

Because Ricky and Steve are going, let's go out on a bang.

These are getting on me tits already.

Won't you make it the Amazon?

Is this it?

I don't want to see all of it, so get that out of your head.

I mean, it's no different to the Thames, is it?

Is it a nice place where we're staying, Will?

It's jungle.

We're staying in the jungle.

It's getting to the end of the day.

I've got to go in the jungle.

I've got to try and sleep in the jungle.

Be careful, have to watch where you're walking.

We have many species of dangerous things.

Like scorpions, tarantulas, spiders,

ants.

Fucking hell.

Wanna go home.

now?

We are very lucky to find a light at the moment to find a place where we

obviously we are lucky

over there.

What you find more?

I'm not.

Yes,

can't be bothered.

What is this about?

How do you know where you're going now?

There's no path or anything.

You're just chopping away.

This is the place place where we stay.

You'll be resting tonight in here.

This is a good place, isn't it?

Yeah.

What do you make of the camp tonight?

It's not a campsite.

What are you on about?

Campsite.

This isn't a campsite.

I've been to campsites.

They have toilets, showers, maybe a little arcade

fella on a, you know, on the front gate, checking you've got a pass to come in.

To them at home, watching it, they're going, don't know what all the fuss is about.

We've seen this time and time again.

I am knackered, and I don't know how to get that across to them at home that I'm pissed off.

We filmed a little bit so far.

I know, but I tell you what, I'll tell you what we could do.

Like Attenborough does, he's got it right.

He does a little thing at the start going, Here I am in the Amazon.

You never see him again.

It's all voiceover.

I bet he lands.

I bet they go, keep that fucking plane engine running.

Here I am in the Amazon.

Then he fucks off, back off, back off home, and then he's sat in a studio, and there I was with a frog.

Where?

We never see him anymore.

He's never there with a frog in his hand.

It's always like a big close-up.

You don't know where he is.

He's at home.

I'm sat in a toilet that I've made

that I know I'll be sat here later having a shit

thinking what am I doing?

What am I doing?

I don't understand what they're thinking.

I mean I thought Ricky and Steve were sending me some Achu Picchu so why am I in the middle of the Amazon now?

How was last night then?

I can't stay again.

I can't, I can't.

Ah, fucking shit.

I can't stay here again.

I've got to move on.

And I can't do the tent again.

So I might as well forget this.

At like one o'clock in the morning, two o'clock in the morning, I'm pissing into an Ebion bottle.

This wasn't the plan.

This wasn't the plan.

Nothing makes sense in here.

That's the other thing.

Nothing makes sense.

Now, that's how much water I had last night.

That there's a little bit left in the bottom there.

There you go.

So, how have I managed to piss that much?

It doesn't add up.

I've got a piss more than I've drank.

And look at the colour of it.

That isn't healthy.

I'm not a doctor, but I've never pissed like that before.

I know I'm not that old yet, but I reckon this is the lowest point of my life.

These are alright these.

I mean I'd eat a rodent

and there's nothing else but it's hard to sort of sit over there and tuck down, you know, tuck into a rat when I know I've got beans and sausage here.

It just seems a bit

gaffed, doesn't it?

I don't normally cook at home.

The deal is, she does the cooking, I wash up.

I haven't got a dishwasher now.

Can't really do anything.

Just have a wander about.

Basically, I'm just showing you a tree now, there's nothing there.

Don't be thinking that green thing's anything

anything?

No, that's just a bit of mould.

You know, do we actually need these creatures for the world to go on?

Alright, that one there I'm talking about, the one with its head down.

Right, there you go, it's walking over there, having a little wrestle with another other one.

Just started a fight, so that's that's a bit of a hooligan, That one.

Everywhere you look, there's stuff whizzing around your ears all the time, or

crawling up your arm, or I'm just going to get bitten a lot.

Little stick insects I've just found on a tree.

I need always something on the arm.

Look at that little fly sat there as well.

Imagine it.

Imagine me and a sick insect walking about.

You'd be forever going, Is that what's his name?

And you'd have to walk all the way up to the twig.

You know, it's just a bloody twig again.

It doesn't work.

She looks nice.

I'm going over there.

Alright, love.

Oh, it's just a stick.

It's hard.

It's a hard life to be a stick insect.

What's that tree all about?

Trees, dangerous trees.

I was worrying about scorpions and spiders and shit.

Fucking tree with knives coming out of it.

I feel like I've seen the jungle now.

You know, I've had a route around, I've seen all the insects and that, so I might as well just have another look at the Amazon.

You know, everyone seems to make a fuss about it, saying, Oh, you know, the Amazon's nice and everything.

What what I saw of it the other day, I wasn't that impressed.

But Will wants me to go out again, so I might as well because there's nothing else to do.

There it is.

Will that come over?

Huh?

Did it a manger?

Did there's no mangera?

I had no idea they had dolphins swimming about.

Do you like dolphins, Carl?

Um,

yeah, they're alright.

It sort of gets on my nerves how people say they're really intelligent, because I've never seen any of them do anything that's blown me away.

I don't know, maybe it's just the way they get raved about so much by people saying they're intelligent.

That's what annoys me.

Because everyone's always calling me a div.

So the fact that they're going, yeah, Carl's an idiot, but they're going, yeah, dolphins are bright.

That's all I mean.

There we go.

You know what I'm saying?

Woo!

Be careful.

Shit.

Whoa,

it's the weights.

I'm just going to use ginger crinkle crunch

The taste is even better here.

Come on.

What?

I want to show you something.

Come on here.

What?

Come on.

Is that well?

I have something to show you.

I think you never see that.

Do you see this kid?

Fucking hell.

I think he wants to eat something.

Did you say it's poisonous or it's not?

No, it's not poisonous.

There's baju, but it's not poisonous.

It's not poisonous.

So these are the ones that wrap round you.

Yeah.

And then you sort of breathe in.

What's that?

I'm going to stand over here a minute because.

Why?

You are in the jungle.

I know I am.

I wish I wasn't.

This is ridiculous, this.

Nothing's normal, is it?

I had two minutes over there, sat by a fire having a biscuit and a cup of coffee.

And all this is going on.

I shook it a bit of biscuit.

Well, what?

I think you eat biscuit.

You eat biscuits?

How do you know?

Have you ever tried feeding one of them?

No, they eat that.

They eat it on frosting then.

Listen to me.

Watch this.

Watch this.

What?

Biscuit.

Okay.

Can you get a light on it?

They had this over here.

The waste of a biscuit, really.

The noises do me heading.

There's different insects going off all the time.

I mean, they say most of the jungle

is nocturnal.

But I'm not surprised.

It all has to be awake through the night.

There's no chance of getting any sleep here, even if you're not a nocturnal animal.

Let's face it with this racket, I'm not going to get any sleep, am I?

Alright, mate, how's it going?

Good.

Well, you're heading upstream.

We've arranged for you to visit

a little village.

The locals there are expecting you.

And you should know to be extra polite because they used to be cannibals.

That's true.

Alright, mate.

See you later.

Come on.

Got a holiday.

Alright.

Is he having a laugh?

What does he mean they used to be cannibals?

I mean,

what are they doing now then?

What happens if it's just

I'm like a rare delicacy that triggers something off?

We haven't let a white man for years.

Before you know it, they're all given it all this.

Hey, hey, hey, around a fire, me sat in a pot.

Well, what am I gonna do?

You're worrying too much.

Worrying too much.

Just go and stay with some cannibals, make you feel look, you know, feel at home.

Okay.

I haven't got a problem.

If I got hungry, I'd quite happily eat

human.

There's no different, they say it tastes like pork anyway.

But say if they took the lid off and it was just a foot

and they sort of said, have a bit, I'd almost be a bit like, well, I want to know a bit about the person first.

In the same way that we do with chickens, everything's got to be, is it organic?

Where's this been brought up?

What field has it been on?

What's it been eating?

I'd be a bit like that.

I'd want an organic foot.

I'd want to know the history of it.

Did he have athlete's foot?

How often he changed his sock?

Just a a little bit of something that goes, yeah, this is a nice foot, it's worth eating.

Alright, didn't wave back, so that's they don't know what that means, or they hate me already.

I don't know.

Nothing, nothing again.

I'm not doing it again, it's embarrassing.

It's like asking someone's name three times and not hearing them.

Are they smiling even?

This is proper, innit?

This is like proper tribe.

Have they seen me?

What a knobhead I look.

What a way for them to see me.

This

are they up there?

Oh, they're all watching as well.

Stairs here.

You think they would have sorted this out for me if they knew was coming?

Do I want the bags yet?

Alright.

Okay.

He's glad to see the back of us, isn't he?

See you then.

Kim, I can't get out of here quick enough.

He knows more than I do, obviously.

Look at him.

Not hanging about, no waving.

Raymond!

Raymond!

Anyone watching at home, he does do tours.

Hello.

How you doing?

Yeah.

How you doing?

How do you say hello again?

Hello.

Chief?

Around?

Presidente.

Presidente.

Presidente.

This is going to be our bad.

See, I don't like that.

I don't like the big

all the attention.

That's one of the reasons I got married.

All that photo everyone's looking at me.

You know where to look.

Women there, we're now on stuff.

It's like, what's going on?

What's he saying, Aldo?

What?

What's that?

Hang on.

Hang on a minute.

Why am I coming?

Where are you coming?

I'm coming here.

Ricky and Steve, my friends,

asked me to stay here on the way to Machu Picchu.

I've just been explaining to

Feller here that I'm on my way to Machu Picchu.

Need somewhere to sleep

on my way.

I'm going to be staying here in a tent.

Right, let's all

get on with it.

We've all got stuff to do.

There's a woman with an axe.

Right,

and she's she's not

wearing the stuff.

It's like she didn't want to join in.

He's mad, isn't it?

No matter where you live, there's a nutter.

Whether it's on a council estate in Manchester, London, in the jungle, there's always one who doesn't want to join in.

Swinging an axe about.

Looks like he's going to chuck it down.

No one else seems to be showing.

And I don't understand why.

This is brilliant.

I mean this child of this is...

they believe in nature and stuff don't they that you use what god gives you i mean i don't know i've just made that up they haven't said anything like that but i imagine that's what they do

Is it alive?

The way it's just left there.

It's not looking good for it, is it?

I don't live here, but I'm guessing things aren't looking good for it.

But I don't want to say don't do that, it's cruel because they'll go, okay, we'll go back to our old times then.

Get in the pot.

So if it's me or that, I'll let them have that.

Don't you the head?

You'd love that, wouldn't you?

You'd love to eat that.

I saw you cutting it off.

You cut it off, you eat it.

But can you let them know that I don't feel like I should take the food from them?

Everybody wants you to eat them.

But you're not telling them what I'm saying.

I need this.

Is the one time I need you to explain.

I don't think I should eat it.

I shouldn't take food off them.

I'm not actually a meat eater.

I don't eat meat.

Vegetarian.

What are they doing for pudding?

What's happening?

What's happening, Aldo?

I don't think I'd see that today.

You know, a fella getting poisoned off a frog, a bit weird, all right.

And they believe that if they stick it on you, it gives you extra energy to go off and hunt, stuff like that.

But it's all about up there, isn't it?

You know, I mentioned my aunty Nora with the amount of drugs she's on.

If she was here, she'd be up for that.

She'd go on, add that.

What are you mixing there?

Toad and a bit of spit.

Oh, I want to try that.

If it hasn't been tested on animals, it's been tested on me, Auntie Nora.

Oh, so what they just burnt in with a stick,

and now they're putting the

toad sweat and man spit on it.

Does that hurt?

Ah, ah.

Has that hurt?

Make you feel dizzy.

Why do you want that?

Why do you want to feel dizzy?

I'm going to be sick in a minute.

No, I'm okay now.

I'm full of life.

I'm great.

Can you let him know I'm full of energy?

Tell him now.

I have that.

I'm not having it done.

Come on, let's go hunting.

See what's happening here.

Keep walking.

Keep walking.

Is this for the hunting or is she just a bit forward?

And the women came over, put a bit of makeup on me, made me look like

a Jaguar.

That's the idea.

Why are you bothering the show with it?

Hang on.

Young Johnny, picking his arrows.

This

for the championship.

That's what I do in my head to sort of build it up like it's important.

This for a hundred thousand pounds and he's got it.

Anyway, they had a go, they were good.

I had a go, I was shite.

I must have had about nine or ten goes.

But people were starting to leave.

I can't do it,

I can't do it.

Looks like they're going hunting.

I thought they would have said to me, you ought to just come.

Even if they didn't want me there.

I know I wasn't that great this morning with

the arrows.

They didn't even sort of sneak off and say, look, we're going to leave him behind because he's useless.

Let's just go one at a time.

Let's not make a big deal out of our hunt.

The whole village came out again to see him off.

And that's another thing as well about tribes that I read before I come here.

They only count up to three

because they don't need a higher number.

I read that.

Honestly, if you like this, you'll love it.

You're the red, right?

These are all yours.

Because they live in a world where they don't deal with mass.

It's all like...

Go on, chicken leg.

Yeah.

How many do you want?

I'll have two.

He sees he's not got it, has he?

So

now watch.

Right, so I win.

Wee!

Are you been out hunting?

Yeah.

How many chickens have you got?

Got three.

What is that all we've got?

No.

Harry got two.

Oh, so we've got three and two.

Oh, great.

They don't need to go higher than that.

Which is why they probably don't understand Connect 4.

Come on, someone else have a go.

This fella looks serious.

He's got a sort of an intelligent kid's haircut.

Oh,

I haven't heard from you.

I hope you're not just been mucking around.

This is a job.

Let's get you out of the jungle.

You're going to catch a flight now to Cusco.

And you're going to do the Inca Trail.

Come on, mate.

Let's get on with it.

Alright, boy.

See you later.

Yo, come down the kit.

Carl.

Eh?

I think they want you to pay for all the

Can you get Aldo to tell these that I haven't got any money?

Because he's a bit awkward this.

He doesn't translate anything.

You have to give them back.

Alright, I'll give them them back.

But it's not because I don't want them.

It's because I just haven't got any money.

See, I don't have any money, they don't give me any money.

I thought they wouldn't take him off me.

Seems like a bad ending now.

It's all gone a a bit downhill now.

I haven't got any money.

Basically, I've got to get on a plane and get over to a place called Cusco,

start the walk up to Machu Picchu, which is fine by me because we're getting closer and closer.

Let's just, you know, let's get on with it.

Just waiting for a plane.

Weird that, innit?

People at home will be going, but you're in a bus stop.

Not.

The airport.

Where is the runway?

Just over there, I think.

That's that field.

It's not an airport, then, is it?

There's a bloke who's built a hut and got his lawnmower out.

Is it safe?

It just seems a bit mad that they've got planes when they haven't got runways.

Like people on bullseye when they used to win boats when they live in a block of flats.

I wasn't even aware of this.

That needs like 30% less oxygen.

I've never heard of that.

So that's going to wear me out, isn't it?

They don't tell you that, do they?

Come and see the wonder and suffocate to death.

I mean, I know the wonder is meant to take my breath away.

More like this.

They've got oxygen over there.

They've got what?

You can buy oxygen in the reception.

Is it like do they have like a little cupboard like the fridge that they have where they charge you ridiculous amounts for a bottle of water?

Up there, they'll have a cupboard full of oxygen, and they know if you're in there going,

you're not going to be going how much?

You're going to pay how much what price do you put on a bottle of air if you need it?

I bet they've got a rights scam going on here.

All right, do you like the jungle?

Yeah, just about.

Just uh

just left there yesterday, just in Costco.

Oh,

Sky one want to talk about series two.

Yeah, well, I'm not doing I'm not doing any more of this, so you can tell him now.

They don't even have to wait for me to get home, just say he's not interested.

He's been around the world now, he's seen it all, he's done everything.

Knock it on the head.

I've been through a load of shit here.

Tell them now, call them now, and tell them that we're not doing series two.

Nip that in the bud.

So you've got my heart going more now.

I'll see you later.

Apparently it's a tradition that if you're going on a long walk, like I'm about to do that I'm not in the mood for,

it's good to see this doctor

who blesses your body, checks out that you're well,

and gets you ready for the trek ahead.

So I meet this bloke, a local fella called Richard.

Tiny, he's thinking he's miles away.

Turns out he's about four or four, so he seemed further away than he actually was.

Richard, yeah, yeah, Carl.

Carl, Carl, yeah, Carl.

How are you feeling?

Um,

sick, yeah, uh

shits.

Yeah.

Headache.

Hey.

You got out like in this bag of shite.

Bits of grass, plastic things.

You know, when you have a bowl at home and you go, I might need that, and you have like you chuck things in it, screws, bits of cotton, string, belly button fluff, whatever.

It's like he'd been round and gone and emptied all the shit bowls around the country and stuck it in a bag.

He got out a guinea pig at one point.

Does he bite?

Yeah, he does.

But when you've seen a doctor

who's using string and old air buds and stuff, you kind of think, well, the guinea pig's probably got more of an idea of what's wrong with me than this fella has.

So I just went along with it.

I wanted a second opinion from him.

You know what I mean?

From the guinea pig.

I don't quite understand what's happening here.

Yeah.

This is dry.

Anything problem for your guinea pig?

He said all the badness that was in me

was transferred to the guinea pig.

So somewhere, you know, there's a guinea pig walking around with major shits.

Is it this way?

Keep going.

Alright, you ready?

We have to bring all this stuff.

Jesus, it's like going out with my mum.

She stops at every shop.

Enjoying the what car?

Well.

Because I'm not well, am I?

Not well.

It's too hot.

That bit of toffee you gave me is worn out.

You got any more?

I'm not in the mood for this.

Just tell us which way it is.

There's no way anyone will be watching this going, that looks pleasant.

Healthy,

fancy going there.

Definitely not.

How can I enjoy it after this?

Or is it meant to work that way?

That you know

you're just happy to be there.

God almighty.

It's in loads of people do this.

I haven't seen anyone.

How much better is it?

How much better is Manchu Picchu compared to that?

Don't you think it's amazing that they made these kind of buildings and it's just going to get better?

I think you're talking shit because

I'm not looking for house here.

This isn't a property programme, is it?

I'm not going to go just like this,

but just something with a bit,

you know, a bit more outside space.

What am I doing it for?

If it's exactly like this, let's stop here.

Doesn't make sense though, because these things are living in look like bungalows.

But what's the point if you've got to keep doing this?

You might as well have a house with stairs.

Bit more pleasant

for fuck's sake.

I don't get it.

Why don't they just want to rest?

They've been walking up there with all these bags, out of breath, and now they're wasting breath, just making a racket.

I mean, that doesn't even sound nice to me.

That's not relaxing.

They're all doing their own thing here.

I mean, I've had a cassette of pure moods, like panpipe stuff

used to sort of make a bit of a romantic evening didn't sound like that and there certainly wasn't a rat involved

God for that

I'm gonna keep walking

all right enjoy your dinner

Welcome to Machu Picchu.

Thank you very much.

Nice job.

Yes.

You're having a laugh, aren't you?

See you.

Are we done a full circle?

For some questions.

there isn't one

there isn't one

I just feel I felt that view earlier that I saw was better than this one

you sure you're looking at the right thing that bit of grass and rock over there

I'm not going any further

Because it's more of what we've already seen and I'm not killing myself

I've done everything that Ricky and Seville want me to to do.

We need to do it anyway, Carl.

We can't.

Well go then.

You're standing here, the sun's going down.

Get over there.

I am not going.

I'll tell you now.

I'm not going anymore.

Alright, then where do I find you?

Well I'm I'm

I'm kind of at the wonder.

Kind of at the wonder or are you at the wonder I mean?

I'm at the wonder

but

I've only just got here, so I've been walking about eight hours, right?

Now,

I'm at a point where I can see the wonder, the cameraman can see the wonder.

But Richard, who's in charge, is worrying, going, Sky, I want to see the wonder.

Have you got a problem if we just see it from here, have a look, and go?

I am not sure I'm happy about this, Carl.

I want to see the wonders of the world in HD.

That's what concerns me the most.

Yes.

I've got you this gig with Ricky on Sky One.

It's a major television thing.

They're putting all their money like this.

This is make or break for them.

But I've been walking for eight hours and the view from here is magnificent.

Are you just saying that now?

Are you being honest with me?

I think it looks magnificent.

Carl, I have never heard you use the word magnificent in my life, so I'm suspicious.

If you feel that the viewers of Sky are not going to be deprived, then I trust you.

But no, you're not going to let them down, you're not going to let me and Ricky down, and you're certainly not going to lie.

No,

don't bother telling Ricky or anything, I'll speak to him when I get back.

Alright, all right, see ya.

Let's see it, Brighton.

There you go then.

See?

Easy.

We'll just do a David Attenborough job on it when I get home, still load a voiceover.

Job done.

70 miles from Costco is one of the old ancient cities of the world.

A maze of old rock

sort of huts, you know, sort of rock huts, boulders, walls, lots of rock-related old stuff.

You know, get lost in the maze.

That's an easy thing to do.

I mean, look at that old fellow down there, and he needs a step ladder to get out of the place.

god knows what she's playing at

and that's good isn't it wonder of the world protecting some strings why not

i mean i'm struggling here if i'm honest with you i don't know how to sell it to you

do you like llamas