Giving Grace To The Weenies: Friday, August 2nd, 2024

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Hey, Zach!

Are you smiling at my gorgeous canyon view?

No, Donald.

I'm smiling because I've got something I want to tell the whole world.

Well, do it.

Shout it out.

T-Mobile's got home internet.

Minutes!

Whoa, I love that echo.

T-Mobile's got home internet!

How much is that?

Look at that, Zach.

We got the neighbor's attention.

Just 35 bucks a month.

And you love a great deal, Denise.

Plus, they've got a five-year price guarantee.

That's five whole trips around the sun.

I'm switching!

It's crazy!

Yes, T-Mobile home internet for the neighborhood.

McDonald's, you still haven't returned my weed whacker.

Carl, don't you embarrass me like this, please?

What's everyone yelling about?

T-Mobile's got home internet!

McDonald's got my weed whacker!

Yes, Yes, T-Mobile's got home internet.

Just $35 a month with autopay and any voice line, and it's guaranteed for five years.

Beautiful yodeling, Carl.

Taxes of these apply.

T-Mobile.com slash ISP for details and exclusions.

Good morning, millennials, and welcome back to the toast from NYC at the Toast HQ.

Yeah, if you're watching on YouTube, we're back.

We're back.

Back in the New York groove.

We just harmonized.

Yeah, because we were singing like different parts of the song

together.

Created a beautiful blend.

Speaking of beautiful blends, we are kind of coming off of a high of an absolute sleigh of the house down.

Boots on the Upper West Side at the Beacon Theater.

Yeah, that's right.

Our live shows, our residency couldn't be going better.

Last night was one of the better nights of my life.

It was so amazing to be back at the beacon.

The toasters were on fire.

Fuego.

Fuego, we were on fire.

Somebody called 9-1-1.

Toasty fire burning on the dance floor.

Whoa.

It was really amazing, really, really fun.

Yeah.

Great crowd, great energy, great show.

So we're coming off the high of that.

We have another show tonight, which is really exciting.

It is.

It's like kind of sad.

It's our last show at the beacon.

I've been like annoying about it.

Like we're New Yorkers.

Like there is significance to playing the Beacon Theater multiple times.

I've been like milking it, like talking, oh, I can't tonight have a show at the beacon.

Like I'm so annoying.

Kill me.

I'm going to miss that.

I will miss that too, but then we can talk about shows of Beacon's Past.

No, not only that, that's kind of why we added that last show in Atlantic City.

Because, like, we're playing at the casino at the Borgata.

That's also like a New York kind of institute.

Well, New Jersey, excuse me, Institute.

Tri-state area.

Yeah, it's like a well-known facility, and we're going kind of from one well-known facility to the next.

August 17th, our tickets just went on sale.

Borgata Casino.

Yeah, that's right.

Borgata Casino.

August 17th, tickets available at the toastpodcast.com slash.

So if you saw some of the fun last night that was had on the Graham at the show and you're itching to catch a gizno, we added one more show.

This is actually now the last show of the summer.

No plans for more shows at the moment, or really who knows.

Yeah.

But if you want to see the Gizno, come to Atlantic City, make a weekend of it.

It's going to be a really, really girlish, swirly, rad time.

I don't want a fear-monger, but I think a lot of people like assume we have more plans for this show.

Like maybe one day we don't currently have anything.

It's a good idea, and obviously, like an obvious idea, but you know, life happens.

We are together all summer, so the Gizno made complete sense.

We'll see what happens in the future, but we have zero plans.

Like, this is truly the last show on the docket.

So, we did release a couple floor seats for tonight's beacon show.

There's, I posted on my Instagram, I'm not sure if there's any left.

Friends and family didn't come after all.

No, literally.

I had to release 20 of our friends and family tickets, even though we did use all of our friends and family tickets last night, so we have a lot of friends and family.

I saw a lot of familiar faces in the audience.

Yeah, because we have a lot of friends in a lot of family.

Yeah, and so we need 100 tickets set aside per show.

Yeah, so tonight wasn't, you know, that that wasn't the case.

So few tickets left for tonight at the beacon.

And then Atlantic City, there are seats left.

So I'm excited.

I don't really know what I'm wearing.

That's always like a bit of an anxiety-inducing scenario.

For tonight.

Yeah.

I'm excited about my fit for tonight.

I literally needed to get a haircut for it.

Oh my God.

Another exciting feature of today's episode is that I have a haircut.

It's just, you know, a refresh.

Nothing drastic.

But

dead ends.

How much did you cut, you think?

Oh, I didn't count.

But the thing is, we kept the length as much as we could, just take off the dead.

But if the dead had been up up to here, I would have taken up up to here, added layers, phrase framing pieces.

So now I'm like back to myself, which mostly makes it more exciting for when I do my daily hair because now I can like fudge a great blowout better.

Yeah, well, you look great.

You look healthy.

You look bouncy.

You look good.

Thank you.

I was very excited about this.

Haircut got my eyebrows done.

So if I'm a little red, just she's giving new woman.

You don't see it.

No.

I didn't want to put makeup over the redness because I want the skin to breathe.

Isn't it crazy to be like back in the city?

It is.

Yeah.

I loved being back in my apartment.

It's been literally five weeks since I've set foot in there, and I love my house.

I really did such a nice job, patting myself on the back.

But my God, I forgot how like demonic the city gets in the summer.

It's really hot, first of all.

Thank God the air conditioning.

The air conditioning in this studio has just, it's kind of, she's on her own journey.

She works.

I relate to her.

Some days she wants to work and some days she doesn't.

She's intermittently working.

I'm really thankful to the Lord.

Today she showed up.

She showed up for work today.

It is so crazy hot outside.

Thick.

In the Hamptons, it's about 10 degrees cooler and you feel those 10 degrees.

Like there's a breeze because you're near the ocean.

You're going to be high water on both sides.

Oh my goodness, so hot, but it's great to be back in the studio.

I will never take this studio for granted ever again.

I'm hopeful that all the technology works today.

I don't want to jinx it, but sort of being on our own out in the Hamptons when it comes to technology, I'm feeling grateful.

I'm feeling excited.

And we clown on this studio a lot.

I don't think so.

No, like, so I always have my issues here.

The air conditioning doesn't work.

There's sirens outside.

The jackhammers.

But it takes, you have to lose something to know, to appreciate it.

Yeah.

And that's what's happening here.

I love this studio.

I'm never moving.

No, it's exciting to like be proper podcasts.

Like, I feel very professional today.

Me too.

And it feels good to have my hands.

We're usually in our Hampton setup holding our microphones.

Breaking our wrist.

It limits our ability to be animated.

And I think that's one of the greatest things about us.

Yeah.

No, and we're also going to get carpal tunnel from holding those heavy things.

But no, not today.

We are hands-free.

Look at us.

Free.

They're just hands.

They're just

hands.

So thankfully,

there's actually really good stories today.

There's a lot.

And sometimes when we do live shows, especially like two during the week, and we've just been together for so long, sometimes it feels like we're running out of things to talk about.

Not today.

The world is spinning.

Fresh.

Love Kunza Fresh.

Kunza Fresh.

Kumza Fresh.

New stories, old stories, Olympic updates.

It's all in there.

So it's going to be a great Friday episode to wrap up the week.

Put a bow on it, head into Gizno night two.

You slept at my apartment last night.

I did.

Tell everyone your thoughts.

Be honest, I didn't prepare for guests.

Like, I haven't been in my apartment in a month.

Usually, if I knew you were coming to town, I would would have like gotten a special duvet like i would have made it nice so we just kind of like steamrolled into my apartment it was like perfect the thing about me is like these days if no one's crying and waking me up in the middle of the night or throughout the night or at 5 a.m or i could literally didn't have to set an alarm usually every day one thing about me is like I don't wake up before my kids.

And maybe if I did, like my mornings would be easier, but like I love sleep.

So to wake up on my own and not to like someone yelling

was, that's literally haven't happened in two and a half years.

So, we went to bed at like 11 and you woke up when?

I woke up at 9 and I went.

I got into bed at 11:30.

It took me a while to fall asleep, and that's like not your house, like, but sometimes, I mean, after an adrenaline high, it's hard to come down.

It actually is very hard to go to sleep after a show, mostly because I'm like chugging caffeine before the show to make sure I feel good.

And it is buzzing, it is like a buzz, yeah.

So, it took a while.

Everyone's texting you about how great you were, right?

It took a while to wind down, but the bed was totally comfortable, and I slept peacefully.

But not only would it not have taken much, but it was a perfect lovely situation.

The fact that I can deliver you back to your family with 10 hours of sleep, like I did my job.

I felt, I feel so good.

Like when I woke up super early and you hadn't like texted or anything, I was like, she's still sleeping.

And I was like, okay, W anti over here.

Yeah, no, it was really nice.

We're not like Charlie's waking up in the night every night now.

Like we're back to that

regression or whatever they want to call it.

So it was nice to just sleep through the night like a baby.

Except they don't sleep through the night.

So whoever fucking said that.

What'd you say?

Except like when they say you slept like a baby.

How old does said baby?

Sleep like really bad.

Yeah.

It's kind of like their thing.

You're right.

Totally.

So I feel like we should dive into it because.

We've got a lot to do today.

We've got a lot to do today.

And like we've dillied, we've dallied.

What more can be said?

Like yesterday, there was no crazy day to tell you guys about.

We got in the car, drove to the city with Romeo and toe and just kind of...

Smashed it like there's like not to be like we killed it.

We looked amazing.

No, we've been back to back and you've kind of seen like every stage of the journey.

It was toast drive beacon, pre-show.

It's literally toast, drive, beacon, toast, beacon, drive.

That's what it's going to be.

Bus, club, another bus.

I've been really putting you to work when it comes to making content, like around the giznos and all the viral trends.

And now at a glance, if you want to just take a step back and like, tell me, like, tell me how, how is it going for you?

Like, you feel tortured?

No, I don't feel tortured in this moment.

You know, like, when I'm ready for content and when I'm not.

Like, when you guys are, like, when, when were you making me do something?

Like I'm literally like wet hair, no makeup.

Yeah.

And I mean like it's time to make a that speaks to our authenticity, Jax.

Like I know, but I do know that's where you draw the line.

Yeah, like get me at my feet.

Eyebrows.

Yeah.

Great.

Let's do it.

That's always fun.

Doing them before Gizno is so fun when we're glammed.

Totally.

But like when I'm on the couch, like rotting, you're like, hey, do this.

Well, you've been doing great, Smithy.

Like really.

Especially because some of the TikTok content like calls for like a rotting vibe, which is fine.

Because then you like transition or whatever.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But when it's like a high-performance TikTok and I'm not feeling my best, that's when I'm like, can I wait?

Like, can't it just fucking wait?

Not the high-performance.

Because TikTok.

Because we're always like in glass, wearing hair and makeup and in an outfit.

So like, I'll be there in an hour.

Can it wait?

No.

Totally.

I want to say one more thing about the Gizno, and then I promise I'll stop talking about it.

But so many of my friends, like most of my high school friends, came last night.

And the funny thing, like everybody who comes to the show, who I know personally, the thing they remark on is how dressed up everybody gets and how it's so nice to see.

because they're like, you know, we live like everyone's always wearing sweatpants.

It's very much like merch energy, which is great.

And I thought maybe that was going to be the vibe of when people showed up because we said wear whatever you want.

Like look fab, but also feel free to wear merch and like leggings.

Yeah, it's your night out.

You want to be cozy.

But the fact that everybody opts, like when we do the mean green, everybody comes in like seriously, dress better than us.

And I'm like, I literally bought a dress this morning that one of the girls was wearing last night.

She told me where it was from.

The bardo one.

Yes, like the main green.

I thought it might be good for like yeah, I thought it maybe I would be good for Atlantic City show.

Does it come in other colors?

Maybe yes, it does.

It does.

Blue, black, pink, and white.

We should match.

Okay, okay.

We got all three.

No, you're stealing my idea.

Okay, cool.

No, no, we're so cute.

Yeah, no, it's like.

Okay, ideal stolen.

Ideal Stolen.

It's fine.

It's fine.

Why can't we match?

No, we can't.

It's so cute.

Yeah, no, it's so cute.

Mind it.

Plus, we want it to match and be showgirls anyway.

Oh, so will we wear these dresses from heretofore?

Oh, no, we want it to be showgirls for Atlantic City.

Yeah, it's true, actually.

It's true.

Okay, I'll allow it.

I'll allow it.

All is that to say, it makes me feel so good.

It's like so sweet that everybody gets so dressed up.

It's a point of pride, and it really, it shows like, I feel very

honored.

Honored.

Yeah.

Like it's so lovely.

And it's so funny that like the thing everybody remarks on to me like literally one of my friends from high school was there and she was like, I cannot believe how dressed up everybody got.

Like everybody looked so nice.

No, even when we were at the WAPAC, the people who work at the venue and who run the venue were like, it's so incredible to see everyone like looking so amazing.

They're so like incredibly like dressed and behave like so lovely towards everyone.

And it's a really wonderful reflection on us.

It's true.

So we just want to say thank you.

Totally.

And I think like when people walking around the city, like who live on the upper west side, like walk past the beacon and they see thousands of like beautiful women in like gorgeous summery gowns, they're like, what kind of convention is being held here this evening?

That's great PR for us.

Because that is like cool, girlish wally's night out.

Like I'll check that out just out of curiosity.

Right.

I would like to be fabulous and beautiful.

Yeah.

Where do I sign up?

Right.

And you sign up at the toastpodcast.com.

You do.

That's where it starts.

Yeah.

It's kind of a slippery slope after that.

We can't be held responsible for what happens next.

It's a gateway.

It's a gateway.

So I just wanted to say that.

Now I'm officially done recapping Dizno.

Hopefully we'll see you guys tonight and at Atlantic City on August 17th.

And that's my promo for the day.

Yeah, no, I mean, of course, we have to talk about Jizo.

Like, that was the big thing.

Kind of like the moment.

Yeah, we did Nobody's Perfect last night.

We did one of my favorites.

We've gotten into this really good group where every night, we're trying not to repeat, but every night we want to choose a song to like sing and have like a real come to Jesus moment with the audience.

Because we all just like love to sing and dance.

I know, and that's like what we're hitting together for.

That's like what happened at Camp Toast.

We were like, had all these activity plans.

And then we all just ended up at the bonfire singing at the top of our lungs.

We're just dancing.

So we just, yeah, we scheduled it.

Yeah, and it happened very like organically.

The first night, Jackie went off and sang the climb, and the whole room started singing.

And like, literally, I was on the verge of tears.

Yeah, so we were like, Let's recreate that.

And every night we choose something new.

Last night, we did, we kind of veered from our usual genre, and we went a little nostalgic.

We went for Nobody's Perfect by Hannah Montana.

It's kind of cross-genre, like, you can't put surprise song in a box.

No, and we have a song for tonight, and it's not what you're expecting.

You never guess it.

I feel like I saw some guesses for last night.

People thought we were gonna do August by Taylor Swift.

We had a discussion.

There was a meeting on the books about it.

Ultimately, we decided the song is too slow.

It's not like a pussy popper.

Yeah.

So the thing is, you could really never guess some of these surprise songs in tonight.

I don't think people will expect, but I'm so excited.

It's Loki one of my favorite songs.

It's Loki one of your favorite songs.

It's not a song you would automatically associate with toastiness, but every toaster knows every single word and they're like probably going to start crying.

Like it's so good.

So I'm really excited.

So you'll have to tune it on Monday to see what we chose.

Yeah.

So without further ado,

let's get into it.

There's a lot to discuss.

Without further ado, did it do.

Here are the fast five stories that you need to know.

I also don't want to bite the hand that feeds me, but I'm a little chilly.

Like,

I'm not going to say it because then the air conditioning will stop working.

But like, I might need to wrap myself up in a blanket.

Not to complain.

And also, the stories are on my phone today.

So if I'm looking at my phone, like, I'm not being rude towards turt.

Like, it's story tings.

We left our iPads at home.

Wait, I have to share one more thing.

Sorry.

Before the,

we'll do it again in a second.

So I'm wearing this really cute necklace.

I don't know if you see.

Yeah, C.

And then it's a C for coachers.

And I posted it on my Instagram because it's Alice and Lou.

And I wanted to be like, look, everyone, like, I got that cool new necklace that sold out.

And like, you didn't.

You didn't slobs.

It was a gift for my friend Alicia, but still, like, you're slobs, and I'm not.

And

everyone was DMing me.

What's the C for?

Like, everybody thinks my name is turdy.

It's really crazy.

They're like, you should actually have gotten a T.

That's really crazy.

Maybe I'll ask Alison just for another charm and like a T.

I can, I can, like, swap between.

C T?

How funny is that?

From Connecticut.

Literally.

That is really crazy.

And I can't thank you enough.

You know, this is my dream, like, actually coming true.

You're so welcome.

I nicknamed it.

It's my dream to have free creative reign on my nickname.

Yes, it's my dream.

Like, my name is so embedded in people's minds, they forgot my original name, my government name.

Like, thank you.

You know what's so funny is my Instagram bio was still founder and CEO of Turdy Lou Global.

Obsessed.

Obsessed.

But that's literally what you are.

Like, I, I, you can't change it.

TLG.

Like, I work hard for TLG.

I'm so glad you brought up Instagram bios.

I like kind of hate mine.

And I feel like, like, I can try and be creative, whatever, but nobody is like funnier or more creative than the toasters.

Like, can you guys sound off in the comments?

Right now, my girl with no job one is the name's Turdy, Turdy Lou, Lou, which is, I like, actually.

It's not terrible.

Okay.

And then Claude with No Job, like, I need to change its FaceTune fan page, which when I was like FaceTuning out of control, like, it was funny.

I don't really FaceTune that much anymore.

Okay.

So Claude with No Job.

That might be an idea.

I mean, the options are like endless of things that we say.

I would like really love some help in the comments.

Like, people are always thinking of things I can't think of.

Do you know what I mean?

Yeah.

Even last night at Gizno, we do this segment, which you guys are probably familiar with.

It's called like title this episode, where we like just talk about the episode at a glance because we're out of time.

Right.

Like if we recorded the whole beacon night.

If this were like an episode of the toast, what should we call it?

So people like will shout out their suggestions from the audience and like they fucking crushed it and it's nothing I would have ever thought of.

A thousand percent.

So that's a fun.

That's a fun time.

So sign up for the comments.

What should I make my new Instagram bio?

Thanks.

And I feel like I've asked people that before.

Yeah, but times are changing.

Do it again.

Sorry, because I ruined it.

So now without further ado, do to do, here are the fast five stories that you need to know.

And the fast five stories that you need to know are brought to you by McDonald's.

As the toasters know, we are wholeheartedly obsessed with the McDonald's.

We respect everything that they put out and we're grateful to them for their work in this industry.

One of their, you know, top-selling, kind of most cult-following items on the menu is the quarter pounder with cheese.

It's a burger so iconic, it's simply known as the QPC.

And there's so much to love about the QPC.

It has melty cheese, crispy pickles, onions, a toasty

bun, ketchup, mustard, like what else do you need?

So I have an important question for you, Jack.

So I have to put you on the spot again, but you're going to McDonald's.

In an ideal world, like where?

When?

What time of day?

Where are you eating it?

What are you wearing?

Like, tell me everything.

When in the afternoon, that's when I need my pick-me-up.

Like during nap time?

A little later than that, like four o'clock, like when we're on the way home from somewhere.

Need a pick-me-up.

What?

French fries?

Guy Coke.

Maybe a McFurry.

Maybe a McFurry.

Who knows?

Can't hold me down.

I mean, if I'm a betting woman, I'm going to say, yeah, a McFurry.

Why?

Because I want it.

Because, look at her, she works hard.

Because I need it.

And where?

In my car.

Yeah.

That's where.

Where all the best things are eaten.

So a quarter pound of cheese is really never a bad moment to devour, whether it's late night after, you know, a couple of cocktails, whether it's like Jack's four o'clock, kids are asleep in the back of the car, and you just need a moment for mommy, you know?

So it's.

Children set the tables.

Your mother needs a moment to hurt.

Your mother needs to jump McDonald's down her throat.

It's that saucy, drippy, oozing with flavor vibe that truly makes the QPC a burger that napkins were made for.

It's the burger worthy of a nickname.

Order the QPC today.

Wait before cooking four ounces.

Fresh beef available at most restaurants in contiguous U.S., not available in Alaska, Hawaii, and U.S.

territories.

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Today's episode is brought to you as well by Splenda Stevia.

So you know Splenda, everybody knows it, everybody loves it, the little yellow packets of sweetener that have just wormed their way into our hearts.

Well, they've created something brand new over at Splenda and it's Splenda Stevia.

So just so you know, it's made by Splenda, you know, iconic yellow brand, but it doesn't have the original Splenda in it.

Splenda Stevia is an all-new sweetener.

It's plant-based and they use U.S.

grown stevia.

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grown stevia that they grow on their own farm in Florida.

Having a U.S.

farm also means lower carbon emissions and greater sustainable practices.

Splenda Stevia comes in packets, pouches, and liquid sweeteners.

This is kind of Splendostevia, a blend of like turd and jacks, because for me, like I'm so Splenda loyal, like I'm at a diner when they give me that, I'm always going yellow.

Like it's just sort of, I was raised on Splenda, I really was.

Who remembers the Diet Coke with Splenda Days?

Like those were the days.

And Jackie, you know, she researches everything and she's like, listen, turd, I think Stevia is the move.

And I said, I respect you, but I'm not changing.

Thankfully, Splenda.

They say for sure, you know how much you hate changing.

They came out with Splenda Stevia, which is literally a hybrid of Jackson Claude.

So visit splenda.com/slash the toast.

Use our code, which is the toast,

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Use our code the toast for a free sample of Splenda Stevia.

Yeah, that's right.

We're just kind of giving away free things on our show.

Thank you, Splenda.

Splenda.com/slash the toast.

Use code the toast for a free sample of Splenda Stevia.

So you could try before you buy.

Thank you, Turt.

You're welcome.

Our first story, Olympics news, major gymnastics news.

Okay, like had the best day of my life yesterday.

Only downside was like I was so busy being a businesswoman, I missed all of the Olympics.

The Olympics individual all-around is kind of the best part of the entire Olympics.

The team gymnastics is just as good.

I don't think it's necessarily worse or better.

I don't know.

This, I feel like.

No, it's huge.

It's huge.

We missed it.

However, Simone and Suni did not miss.

No.

So Simone Viles took gold in the individual all-around, and Sunny Lee took bronze with Rebecca from Brazil sandwiching

as silver.

She showed up.

I think we all knew like Simone was going to do what Simone was going to do, especially after she made it very clear during the team function that she was like here to stay.

But anything can happen.

Oh, so true.

But I think watching the

team competition, it was very clear.

Like Simone is very much like in a league of her own.

And even during the team one, she did like her easier tricks.

Like she didn't do the ones that she's had named after her, the kind of historic ones, the ones she's been first to do.

And she still was like kind of like

a lot better than like everybody else's square.

And for the individual, we knew she was pulling out like her big

fancy tricks.

So it's not surprising, but there is more Simone drama.

Okay, I talked about this briefly, but she responded to it.

Did you see?

What?

So her husband, they had like a big party after I think the team won.

There was like a bunch of people and medals and American flag in the back.

They looked like they were at a bar.

And it was a picture of Simone and her husband, and her husband was

wearing her medal.

And somebody had made a TikTok drama channel, like

remarking on it.

And Simone commented.

And honestly, it was such a good response.

Let me find it.

I saw it this morning.

I was like, okay, pop off.

Like, that I love, I love when people do that.

Oh, okay.

I feel like sometimes it's the opposite where it's like, you've just given this hater a platform, like Christian McCaffrey, we were just saying.

Yes.

But maybe it was just like the way she

said the comment she left, like, I left it.

Okay.

But give me 45 minutes to find it.

Okay, take your time.

But I also wanted to mention that that she beat Rebecca by about just over a point.

So it wasn't miles ahead.

The equivalent of like a fall.

Yeah, yeah, I guess.

Even though like she was on her tail.

And Simone did say that she's never had someone like so, so much on her toes.

Yeah.

And that she's relieved that it's over.

Okay, ready?

Mm-hmm.

They make it so hard to find.

Yeah.

Like just this one comment I'm looking for, but I found it, okay?

Okay.

no, I didn't.

I'm sure it's also been written up, like, similarly.

That's what I'm looking for.

Okay,

like they make it too fab, they like make such a meal.

Just show me the comment, yeah, just screenshot, just screenshot.

Like, I'm not even in it anymore.

I just know.

Okay, hold on, I'll help you look.

No, I'm gonna find it.

Like, on maybe the girl deleted it.

Just, oh my god, they're so annoying.

No, even if she deleted it, I'm going to Google images.

What's a comment?

No, I'm not having success.

Okay, found it.

Simone, the crazy thing is, I put my medal on every single one of my family members and took pictures.

So don't ever make assumptions.

Like, y'all are so fucking miserable.

Leave us alone.

Like, I loved that last line.

Like, people really sometimes need to be told straight to their face, like, fuck all the way off, bitch.

No, and that's what we say about context.

Like, even when you were saying it yesterday, we were like, oh, that's a little weird, but maybe, like, does everyone put their medal on their husband?

Like, what's no, everyone puts their medal on every single person.

And to pick out the one and be like, he's making it about himself when, no, everybody does that.

No, of course.

I mean, if I literally knew someone even remotely, like through marriage, like someone's third cousin, and I was at a function with them, I'd be like, can I try it on?

Yeah, no, it's like when a friend gets engaged, I'm like, can I try on your ring?

If I ever was in the home of somebody who like won an Oscar, I would like to take it.

Yeah, and take a picture with it.

Yeah, of course.

Like, leave the man alone.

Like, I'm really over.

I'm over it.

Yeah.

Well, I'm glad that she spoke up for herself, and I actually don't think it will have that effect of like making something bigger because also like this Jonathan Owens narrative is so big already.

Like that's actually the only narrative that I feel like

is pervasive enough that Simone probably feels a lot.

And it's so personal.

Like unlike the lazy one, because that was not something I had seen, but like Jonathan is really, like, that's really the subplot.

Like her husband thinks he's the main character.

No, and also like I could see that being the one that like really.

gets her gets to her the most because that's like so intimate and so personal like you want to protect your husband and like people are being mean to him because you are this famous person and like that's got to feel like awful yeah so i totally i don't clown on her for responding and i actually think the response was amazing and we needed that context like i'm glad to have that information like there's a million pictures of like her dad and her mom like where are the comments there right but those aren't you know going on drama channels correct so sunny lee took third she said she did not think she would meddle so she was over the moon i'm so excited to watch back but just gymnastics and that's it for gymnastics right i think which is so sad that's so sad like the best

just started.

No, I know.

And it's like, okay, so what are we still like watching?

I mean, everything else, but like

swimming, I feel like swimming never ends.

Swimming never ends.

And a lot of them are like elimination-based, right?

So I think men's basketball is still in.

Like tennis.

When you're still in, you're in.

Yeah.

But I don't know, that feels kind of early.

It's only been a week.

Yeah, but it's only like a two-week program, the Olympics, you know?

Yeah.

And I'm actually glad for the girls that won, obviously they won, but now that like the hard work is

done, they can like chill in Paris, go to, there's so many celebrities.

yeah,

it's so true, they're all of legal drinking age.

Well, Simone already was, but yeah, yeah, except for the youngest one, right?

She's 16, yeah, so maybe not her, maybe not, but you know, but no, that must be like a really fun time, like post-win, still one week left, yeah, you're so famous, yeah, like seriously, I feel like those girls are about to have like one of the best weeks of their lives, and they deserve it 100%

Mazeltov.

Mazeltov.

Are you ready for our next story?

Some crazy, great,

and sad news at the same time.

Cardi B reveals that she's pregnant.

She's expecting her third baby after filing for divorce from Offset.

So, Cardi B is going to be a mom again.

Yay for her.

She revealed that she's pregnant and she said, With every ending comes a new beginning.

I'm so grateful to have shared this season with you.

You have brought me more love, more life, and most of all, renewed my power.

Reminding me that I can have it all.

You've reminded me that I have to choose between life, love, and my, that I never have to choose between life, love, and my passion.

I love you so much and cannot wait for you to witness what you helped me accomplish, what you push me to do.

So her pregnancy announcement comes one day after she filed for divorce from her husband offset after six years of marriage.

Yesterday was like a crazy day in terms of Cardi B and announcing things.

Right.

And the announcements felt like they would be contradictory.

Right.

Typically, you know, you don't...

It's not.

Announce a pregnancy and a divorce in the same day.

Right.

This is like a couple I personally no longer care about.

They've like kind of fatigued me with the, will they, won't they?

This is like the third time I think that they've announced that they're getting divorced.

But she filed.

No,

maybe they are.

It's not that I don't believe them.

It's like, I actually don't care anymore.

And there was a time where I was actually really invested in these two because I thought they were a perfect match.

And I thought, like, the way they just came together in this beautiful way and then, like, had a baby, and the baby's name was cultured, and everybody was obsessed with the baby.

Like, it was a story I was heavily invested in.

They have fatigued me to the point where, like, I actually do not care anymore.

Well, now they'll have, well,

this would be their third child together.

And I guess,

what's two children with your partner that you're not with, or three?

And I'm sure she loves having kids and is excited to be a mom for the third time.

Yeah, no, I think that she's like, that's so crazy that, like, in the middle of their pregnancy, that's always big news.

I mean, if that happened to someone in your personal life, but even celebrities, and I can only think of one other time where like someone was pregnant or two times actually and like split up in the middle of their pregnancy, right?

Even though I'm surprised it doesn't happen more because I think a lot of people have a baby because they think it's a fix, right?

That's like a common thing.

It's like a bunch of people.

They didn't even have the baby yet.

Right.

Well, so that's why it's too broken to even.

Yeah.

What is her other baby's name?

I know Culture was the first one with a K.

Wave set.

Got it.

And he is two and a half.

And Culture is six now.

Oh my God.

I've been following this saga for a long time.

I remember when she was born.

They've been married for six years.

Like, that's kind of a long time.

No, it is.

And I've always really thought of them, even though they've had like crazy drama.

And I don't really keep up with it anymore.

But I've really always thought of them as like an institution.

Like, and I thought that they would work it out.

The filing, I don't know if that means they're actually going to go through with it, but

it's just really crazy to announce, to be pregnant, to announce your pregnancy and file for divorce at the same time.

Like what a, what a hectic day.

For sure, but that's so Cardi B.

You cannot put her in a box.

No.

Don't even try.

Yeah.

She said it wasn't due to cheating rumors.

It rather has been a long time coming.

I don't know.

I'm not buying it this time.

I don't think that's it.

It feels like now that if I'm going to get invested, which I like feel myself getting invested again, I don't feel.

Now is the time.

I don't think it's their time for divorce.

You don't think that they should get divorced or that they will?

I don't know enough about their marriage.

I don't know if they should or they shouldn't, but I don't think they will go through with it this time.

I agree.

Although her being pregnant is like, it's different.

You know, every other time they've announced it, she hasn't been pregnant.

So that's like a little crazy, but no, I don't think this is it.

Okay.

I don't.

Call me crazy.

Well, Mazotove to her.

Yep.

She seems is very happy, and that's exciting news.

It is exciting news.

That's just like, that's pretty cardy, though.

That's pretty cardy.

Pretty cardy.

Are you ready for our next story?

I am.

Britney Spears' biopic, The Woman in Me, will be turned into a movie directed by John M.

Chu.

So this is like legit movie memoir news.

Britney Spears' memoir, The Woman in Me, is being turned into a biopic.

You know what?

We read this for the Redheads.

I wonder what we did for Hollywood Treatment.

Oh, oh, wait, so a biopic, like, so, okay.

It's going to be a movie based on her book.

Okay, I saw this story, and I don't know why, I just like assumed documentary.

No, I'm done.

No, this is going to be like a...

a proper

who plays Britney?

Addison.

Addison.

Addison.

I saw a list today of like 10 actresses.

It was like People Magazine, 10 actresses who could, who would be like good for it.

And there was a name that I actually thought was interesting.

Sabrina Carpenter.

Obsessed.

And a lot of people forget she got her start in this industry acting on the Disney Channel.

She's so much more than a pop star.

Yeah.

And of course she can be.

Slaver a singer.

That's a very good call.

It is a good call.

I would really like that, but I just hope Addison is throwing everything she has at this.

Me too.

But I, do you think she is?

I don't know.

I feel like she loves like the time off.

I think she loves not working.

I think she like pops up every couple of weeks to do a brand deal just to continue funding her lifestyle.

Do you think that she would want this part and like want to be?

I feel like she's already, there's a lot of Britney comparisons between the two of them.

Do you think she would like want to be associated with Britney for the rest of her career?

I don't think the comparisons bother her in the slightest.

I think it's like the best thing you could say to her.

And she just made an announcement.

She's like kind of one of the new faces of Pepsi, which is in another Britney-coded sponsorship.

No, it needs to be Addison.

Like this could be Addison's Oscar moment, which I've always known was coming.

And there's so many fun facts about the movie and its cast and crew crew thus far.

Obviously, John Chu is the name on everybody's lips because he did Wikidata.

And he did Crazy Rich Asians.

Oh.

Mark Platt, who's Ben Platt's dad of Legally Blonde and La La Land, will produce it.

Wait, who's Ben Platt going to play?

Like, obviously, Nepo baby, even though he, like, I feel like he'll never work with his dad, even though I believe his dad produced the Deer Van Hanson movie, which was a piece of shit.

If they were to cast him, although I think given given his scenario,

given his scenario, like with the New York reporter who who asked him about nepotism.

But if we were to cast him, who are characters mentioned in the book?

Like

her family, the husband.

She has a brother.

Okay, what does he look like?

Probably not like Ben Platt.

Yeah.

Nobody around Britney Spears even remotely looks like Ben Platt.

No, there's no place for him.

And also, his dad did Legally Blonde and La La Land.

Ben Platt wasn't near either of those.

Like, I think his dad can work without throwing Ben in the mix.

I think his dad can too.

I think Ben probably wants him.

You think?

I mean, this is huge.

And as a gay man, Brittany's like everything.

I do think he's going to try and warm his way in there.

Okay.

Even though he's not wormed in there.

There's really not a place for him.

Yeah.

There's no role that comes to mind.

Apparently, so Universal Pictures has won the rights after a fierce months-long auction.

I feel like we haven't had a serious move.

Like, yes, we get lifetime versions of people's biopics, which I have to remind myself is biopic, allegedly.

No, no.

I think we say biopic and it's biopic.

No, I think it's biopic.

Oh, so it's not a real word.

So we can call it biopic.

But the pronunciation kind of goes out the window with fake words.

Like an abbreviated word.

Okay.

It's slang.

It's a

biographical picture.

Biopic.

Okay.

Biopic.

I don't remember.

I don't remember.

Whatever.

Anyways, I can't remember the last time we got a biopic about someone who's like either alive or really young, like this.

Yeah, like the biopics that recently that come to mind are, of course, like John Elton.

Yeah, the Elton John one, Bohemian Rhapsody.

Elton John is like, he always says he's retired, but he's not.

And Freddie Mercury is obviously dead.

So yeah, I agree.

It's kind of crazy to have a biopic of somebody who's still very much like alive and kicking in a real way.

And the story is ongoing.

It's unfolding as we speak.

I feel like Elton John, like, you know, his story.

It's over.

There it is.

Yes.

But also.

Not much is going to change.

I think, and I'm glad to report this story because I think just based on my very sort of amateur calculations, like I feel as though Brittany Spears is in a place or she'll get to a place really quickly where she needs money.

And this is the type of deal that really sets you up financially.

So I'm happy for that because I don't know how she continues to live the extremely extravagant lifestyle with like the jets and the homes and the trips without really ever working.

She did the book

and then she did that song.

Yeah, but these are the big things that you like, you could always tap into in your career and like.

This is like a backup plan.

So that's why I think maybe people don't do it so young.

Yeah.

Because anybody like who has a biopic is like super successful.

But Brittany's at like, she had this kind of fucocked.

but this will allow her to take years off and then maybe back to Vegas in a better healthier way.

Do you see they say Celine Dion's going back to Vegas?

She's like very close to signing a deal with Resorts World, which is one of the new resorts.

Um which is kind of crazy if she's coming back to Vegas period and if it's not gonna be at like the place that she was at for so many years Caesars that's really crazy.

Is it?

Yeah, I think so Coombs afresh.

No, of course and like whoever comes to the table with the most money, Celine's a businesswoman, not a charity.

Like she's not gonna be doing shows because of like the vibes.

Right.

But it's just crazy that they would let her go.

Yeah.

When these resorts have unlimited money.

Yeah.

Well, maybe they're trying something new.

Yeah.

No, and this is great for resorts world.

It's hard to be a new girl on the strip.

This is great for me.

Yeah.

We're going.

For sure.

For sure.

Make like a week, a festival.

Thousand percent.

Yeah.

Vegas fest.

Right, well, early fest.

Jizno Vegas.

Literally.

Literally.

Anyways, I'm excited about this.

The book was good.

We read it for the Redheads, which I totally forgot.

So if you want to recap of the book and like our thoughts, but doing the Redheads episode on this book, like made me actually hate it.

Not hate, but like took it down a few points.

Like there were things about it that I didn't notice that the girls pointed out.

And I was like, oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Other main characters from the book besides Brittany, her family, maybe Jamie Lynn could play herself.

Her parents.

Her parents.

Justin Timberlake, right?

Yeah.

Like the boyfriends and the Kevin Fedder line.

Who do we think for Justin Timberlake?

Like who's a young hot thing actor?

Joshua Bassett.

Joshua Bassett.

And Sabrina Carpenter.

It's not a D-com Jackie.

No, by the way, I didn't even say it because of her.

Okay.

It's because he has the hair.

Curly hair.

And he's a singer and he's that age.

but he's not believable.

He's not like physically looks like him, he's not physically big enough.

Like, Justin Timberlake was like this tall,

broad

Joshua Bassett.

And I think this is like kind of the question on everybody's lips when he was like at the helm of that saga, is like a little boy.

Stand on a stool.

I don't think I've ever made a better call.

No, I think it's actually really bad.

I'm thinking like Harry Styles, Jacob Lordy.

Yeah, like Justin Timberlake was really tall.

Like, he was that bitch for a minute.

Let's get a height check.

Yeah, okay.

I also just want to know now.

Justin timberlake height 6'1 okay how joshua bassett has to be 5'8 yeah he's not 6'1

basset height

it's like not even here right that's how short he is 5'11.

no way according to capital fm.com well obviously they are joshua bassett mole yeah it's propaganda it's propaganda wait here it says six foot you guys there's literally no way he was the same height as olivia rodrigo and they were on that show i think he's shorter

Oh, wait, Claude, he looks tall-ish.

I don't know how tall these other people are.

He's not a good cast.

I don't agree.

I don't like that

example.

We need to think of somebody else that we can agree upon before we go.

Claudia, he's literally Justin Timmerlake.

Yeah, no, that's a good picture.

That picture just, he looks like Justin Timmerlake, but I don't like it.

I'm cracking up.

But the Serena Carpenter call is exceptional.

Better than Addison?

Better than Addison.

How could you say such a thing?

And why?

Even though, like, accent-wise and I think so much of like Britney's upbringing was like that sweet, like that's really why America fell in love with her, that like very sweet southern young girl.

That literally is how Addison talks because she's from Louisiana, where Britney is from here.

She looks like Brittany.

So Sabrina would have to do like some, you know, months of dialect class and like coaching.

And prosthetics and the makeup department's working harder, whereas with Addison, like she could go without making her.

Oh, natural.

Yeah, for sure.

No, it's interesting.

It's very interesting.

It's exciting to think about.

And because they have such legit people at the helm, like it's going to be amazing.

Oh, yeah.

No, I feel good.

Like, honestly, if they make a biopic of my life, like, give me John Chu and Mark Platt.

Like, you kind of enjoyed it.

Ask for more.

Maybe a little Pasik and Paul sprinkled on top.

Yeah, like a little James Cameron never heard.

But I'm really pleased with where this ended up.

And it's like very swirly.

Like, James Cameron, it would be so serious.

Yeah.

Ron Howard, like,

John Chu, swirly.

Ben Platt, swirly.

No, it's good.

It's good.

I think, like,

and I hope the deal, and I'm sure it is, I'm sure she had the best people doing it.

I hope the deal is like

substantial in terms of like back end.

If the movie makes a billion dollars, like she needs it, she needs it and she deserves it.

Yeah.

Are you ready for our next story, our fourth story?

I don't think that you are.

I don't know.

I could be.

Okay.

So should I just make you ready?

Yeah, because we have one more story.

They have Queenie Weenie.

Like, we have like time.

Okay.

It's never enough time.

Megan Markle and Prince Harry are sitting down for a rare joint interview on CBS Sunday morning, their first interview since their Oprah Winfrey special in 2021.

They spoke with Jane Pauley for CBS Sunday morning to talk about online bullying.

So Megan Markle and Prince Harry are continuing their campaign for online safety.

The Duke and Duchess of Sussex sat down with Jane Pauley for a new interview that will air on Sunday, August 4th, Megan's birthday.

That's sweet.

In a preview clip released by the network, Megan spoke about her desire to protect their two children.

I saw the clip, and I think there's like no hoop law being made for this interview.

Like remember when the Oprah one came out?

Like seriously I was on a VPN in the middle of the Caribbean like trying to get access.

But that's because like that was a tell-all.

No, that was like gossipy.

This is like they're you know doing like their charity stuff.

Like that's great.

Who cares?

You know, not to be rude.

Like and I just want to say endorse the message.

And I think what they were saying is like what happens to the kids on the internet is even worse than you could possibly imagine.

Like these kids are killing themselves like left, right, and center.

And I endorse the message, but like from I'm like a annoying yenti gossip, like like board.

When I first saw they were doing a sit-down special, I was like, oh, wow, okay, like we're catching up.

Here we go.

Here we fucking.

And I was like, let's go.

Yeah.

Yes, it's part of their like Archwell Foundation.

It's philanthropic.

It's an important message.

Something that we talk about all the time.

I don't really know who with a platform would be against this.

Right.

Who they're familiar with.

Well, it's people who have vested interests in like big tech.

True.

So like they're up against this big giant and like they're not going to win.

Yeah, but like they're friends with Jeff Bezos.

Right.

Like he could help.

He could fix it in two seconds.

Right.

Or he could like make a couple calls to the person who could fix it.

Right.

So yeah, like no arguments from me.

You know, no.

It's not giving like I'm tuning in at eight o'clock on the dot with popcorn and you're not allowed to go to the bathroom until it's over.

Yeah.

And that was the energy I brought to the Oprah interview.

Right.

But also I don't know that like they're saying anything like new to the conversation in general.

But you know, here we are having a conversation about the dangers of online bullying and that's kind of their impact.

Yeah.

And I hope, you know, it goes further with some takeaways.

She looked great.

You turned on the local news.

Well, you turned on the Olympics in my room.

Yes.

And then it went to the local news.

And they, I,

what is more fucking depressing than the local news?

Well, no, they were talking about this new initiative called like wait till eight.

And it's a group, like thousands, tens of thousands of parents who have joined it that are campaigning for parents and children to wait till their children are in eighth grade to give them a smartphone.

Oh my God, I thought you were going to say wait till they're eight years old to give them a smartphone.

I'm like, that's insane.

You have to wait.

No, till eighth grade.

I think that's a good one.

And And it's part of this movement that we were just talking about, about that author, Jonathan,

about like the, you know, about the like dangers of.

Yeah, so I think like this is a part of that.

And I think that's all towards the good.

No, it's definitely a movement that's starting with the wealthy moms of this country and it's becoming like huge.

And I really think it's something that all moms can engage with.

No, of course, of course.

But I think it started with them.

Like they really like took to social media to get this initiative off the ground.

And now it's having like national movement.

And I so endorse it.

I think it's fabulous.

Yeah.

No, I i agree i i would love to debate a mother who doesn't know give it to them sooner no and let me tell you something about those wealthy moms when they put their mind to something they they start a committee yeah it's over for you like they're getting done that pta for sure but it's just it's also just moms like moms get things done of course no i'm not saying like wealthy moms no but i'm just saying wealthy moms have like the

resources

yes they have the resources to like seriously like spend money get messages out there if they don't have jobs like do this full-time powerful husband yes i'm not saying if you are not a wealthy mom you can't make change change, please.

No, I know that's not what you're saying.

Okay.

I'm just saying, like, you give a task to unemployed, wealthy women with kids, and the task revolves around their kids.

Yeah.

It's going to be fun.

No, and you get them fired up about something.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Are you ready for our next story?

No.

It's our fifth and final.

Or the fifth and final day of the week.

Brought to you by Peloton.

Yeah.

Okay, so our new house in the Hamptons actually has a Peloton tread, and I'm really excited about it.

So it's your run, your way, all on your terms this summer with with Peloton.

You can define what it means to be a runner.

So I've, you know, kind of been on a running journey.

Everybody's talking about it.

And let me tell you on, I use the Peloton app because my gym at home doesn't have a Peloton tread, but when I'm on a Peloton tread, I also, it's so brilliant.

I love, that's really how I started getting into running at first, like before I started running with a coach.

They have so many fabulous classes, like introductory that are half walking.

Like, cause I was like, is everybody just running for 30 minutes?

It's like, no, we're like running for one minute and then walking for three.

And so I found those introductory classes with amazing music amazing vibes to be so so helpful and now I'm like so many months into the journey I can go for a run outside like it really set me up for success um

Summer is for you and how you choose to move.

The best time to show up as you are.

So you can work in workouts for your life on the go.

From their pop runs to their walk and talks, you can define what it means to be a runner.

They have such a great range of classes.

Makes it really accessible and not intimidating when you start.

So whether you've got five minutes or 45, Peloton has workouts that you can work in from guided runs, walks, hikes to Pilates, strength classes for the gym.

I love a lot of their arm workouts too.

Having the app downloaded on my phone also have a Peloton bike in my gym at home.

So I have like started to do that.

Love the Taylor Swift classes.

So if you want to make the most of your sunny days, you can bring your workouts with a range of outdoor content on the app.

So you don't have to be stuck in the gym when it's gorgeous out.

They've got guided runs.

So call yourself a runner with Peloton at onepeloton.com slash running.

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Our fifth and final story: a little hair news.

I'm in a nut, this is my fam.

And I'll die living just as free as my hair.

Literally, me when I don't iron my hair.

News celebrity hair care line Blake Lively announces her new hair care line called Blake Brown Beauty.

And here's the major key to her hair secret.

Yeah.

It won't include conditioner.

So Blake Lively announced she is launching her own

hair care line, Blake Brown Beauty, on August 4th in a new Instagram post.

And she told Vogue the surprising secret behind her incredible hair is what will set her brand apart.

Not only did she reveal that she doesn't use conditioner, she said that no one in Hollywood does either.

Really?

Yeah, she said, I don't know anyone who uses conditioner in my industry.

She explained that her shiny, bouncy hair was achievable to anyone by simply switching up their products and that her line will include a special regimen of shampoos and hair masks.

She said, it's not that people in the entertainment industry are gifted with better hair.

We're using a different hair system that the process promoted

that

than the process that is promoted to the mass market.

Instead of following up shampoo with traditional conditioner Users of her hair care line will wash then apply a hair mask swapping the hydrating system for a strengthening duo on the next shower.

Okay, like I was seriously about to clown so hard, but why do I feel like

converted?

I can't believe people aren't using shampoo.

Conditioner.

Conditioner.

And is she saying, it sounds like what she's saying, like she's taking down big shampoo.

Like, you're right.

Why do I keep saying that?

No, but no, but the big shampoo industry.

Like, why?

Who made the rules that you go shampoo condition?

You know, like, yeah.

So, like, it's just sort of something we do but why and also like now they do double shampoo.

Yeah, they do I like dry bar.

I yeah, I got double shampoo today.

She asked you want to and I was like, yes, I like a little more extra clean

scratching totally best part of a haircut.

Um, so I wonder if it's it's like a two shampoo regimen.

And what's the point of double shampoo?

Just extra clean as an aside.

Extra clean.

Did it not work the first time?

Well, no, I think a lot of people, when they get their hair professionally done, they are not going to wash it for a while.

So let's get it like hella clean.

Okay, yeah, that will be me.

Yeah.

Well, like, even when this well it's gonna last you the rest of the summer yeah seven days minimum okay so i have conflicting thoughts because really at first and i saw this and i was like okay she has a betty booze i don't know how well that does her canned her non-alcoholic like turned alcoholic they actually ended up coming out with alcohol they were first like just mixers chasers or something you could drink yeah i don't know like how popular it was and i was like does she need another company but i did like this story because that dress that she wore to the uh launch event with the mushroom purse like seriously, one of her best looks of all time.

And I was just clowning on her for what she wore to Wolverine.

So I need to give credit where credit is due.

Like, seriously, she's never looked better.

It's her best look ever.

No, and also, like, Blake Lively, hair.

Yeah.

You know, it's like she's an iconic head of hair.

If I had to pick five people in Hollywood with the most amazing hair, clearly, very naturally, too, but also because she's been in the industry for a while, that's very hard on your hair, but she maintains like an amazing head of hair.

She's had four children.

Your hair falls out.

Still, her hair is amazing.

I would take hair tips from her.

No, it's so.

This is a no-brainer.

No-brainer.

And I kind of wish she did this first because I think she actually, and I remember we made it a story.

I like having a flashback to talking about it in these exact chairs.

When she announced Betty Buzz or whatever, this line of like mixers, she got like a little bit of flack because she's sober.

So it's like, why are you getting into this if you don't have like a well?

I think that's the point because it was like non-alcoholic drinks.

You could use it as a mixer, but you could also just enjoy the party with it.

It felt random for sure.

Yeah.

I think hair care, and we were talking about this when Beyonce was announcing her hair stuff.

I don't know.

Did that ever come out?

Yes.

There really hasn't been a big celebrity hair brand yet.

They've totally taken over makeup.

Like, you seriously want to start a makeup company if you're not a celebrity, good luck.

Nobody's really done hair

like a Kylie Cosmetics, like a Rare Beauty, like a, you know, all those companies.

And I think she could be the one to do it.

But I did say that about Beyonce.

Yeah, I think that she can be the one to do it.

It'll just actually depend at this point on like the team she has and

what like I feel like for Rare Beauty like what I don't know what company like Selena worked with.

Sephora like is one of the owners.

They crushed it.

Yeah well they really leaned heavily into social media so I saw like it's about marketing and it's about product it's about distribution.

It's like it's really about marketing.

It's like on the back end because yeah, I'll buy makeup for many of these people.

Blake can only take it so far.

Right.

Yeah.

But she's a really good starting point.

Also she said that her first acting job like really damaged her hair and she had a hairstylist who told her like that this process of shampoo and hair mask could save her hair and that's what she's she's been doing ever since.

Okay, no, I'm seriously becoming like so into this idea.

Fuck conditioner.

Fuck conditioner.

I've not had problems with it, but I would try this method.

I love the way it makes my hair feel.

But like I logistically, hair masks are a little tough.

Like do you get out of the shower with it and then get back in?

Where do you rinse it out?

Do you, or no, the thing is, I think you like...

When you're washing your hair, you quickly just go wet it, put the mask in, and then like go do some chores and then fully shower.

No, but you do shampoo first in this process.

That's what, that's why I never do hair masks that often because it's laborious.

It is laborious.

And it requires planning when I'm like, I just got to catch a shower.

So to do this for every shower, like I just want to know what the process is.

So there was a brief period where I was really into the Olaplex hair mask and the way I did it, but I'm a bath girl.

It's like I take a bath, I wash my hair in the bath, I put the hair mask in, I tie it up, and then I like read in the tub, have a nice, luxurious tub for however long I want, and then I rinse it out.

So the tub girls stay winning.

I literally don't even take showers.

Like I only take baths.

Yeah, I'm looking.

It's on Target right now.

So I want to see if there's like directions.

Also,

the products look really nice.

I also, I saw a lot of pictures from her launch event and she like very much went the route like inviting, you know, social media influencers.

And I'm sorry, like if you want to start a brand, especially in like the celebrity space and you think you're too good to like partner with influencers, like sorry, Selena Gomez, Haley Bieber, they are out here taking pictures with the likes of me.

Like that's what you have to do.

Like it's a cutthroat TikTok eat TikToker world and you got to play that game.

And if you think you're too good for it, like your brand will suffer.

It will.

Yeah.

Sorry, I don't make the rules.

That's just how the world works.

No, it looks really nice.

And I didn't realize, like, it's available now.

I love it.

I love it.

I love that.

I'm going to have a link to launch and a link to buy because I'm going to forget by the time it comes out.

No, and it's like, it's great.

Let's talk about it.

But then six months go by and I don't get a product.

I'm like, I'm bored.

Yeah.

You forget.

Like, we're, you know, short attention spans.

Yeah.

So I think this is like great business sense.

It makes sense.

A great business acumen.

And we're constantly respecting fellow women in business.

Yeah.

So

those are the fast five.

Thank you so much for your time.

And before we wrap up, it's time for Queenie and Weenie of the Week, our weekly segment that brings joy to seriously millions,

where we both nominate someone for the queenie of the week and the weenie of the week.

Who was acting queenie like this week?

Who was acting weenie like this week?

Would you like to,

which one should we do first today?

First, you always start with good news.

Okay.

My queen is the obvious queen of the week.

I mean, of course, like the Olympians, you know, Alona Mar, Simone Bows, yes, yes, yes.

But like in pop culture,

Ballerina Farm, the way that she handled everything, like she crushed it.

You guys know how we feel.

Absolute queenie behavior.

So happy for her.

I saw she was like making like an outdoor cook fest with like her friend.

Yeah, I was just like loving back to her stories.

Like she's back to ballerina.

And I'm just so glad she's come through this.

I think stronger and better than ever with probably way more followers.

Yeah.

By the way, that's a great one.

I mean, it's just the opposite of it.

It was almost mine, but mine's a little bit different because I've been on this personal journey and my queenie of the week is actually going to be a man, which I don't know if I've ever done.

And it's jonathan owens you guys know nobody holds on to things more than me but i've had a renaissance and i actually i think he is a good man

and i'm gonna start like defending him and i need everybody to stop clowning on him and i think the way he's acted in tokyo p-jom energy like did you see he went to the louvre like because he's in paris and he took a picture in front of all this famous artwork and then he photoshopped his wife into all the famous artworks and posted it on instagram like saw the bet the goat at like obsessed i'm sorry he is a p-jom i really think he is and i think he's deeply misunderstood so he is my queenie of the the week.

I love that.

And connected to that, my weenie of the week, which I think is like, you know,

a lot of people's weenie of the week is.

I know.

There's a couple like obvious weenies of the week who like took a major L this week, but it, I don't know why.

It just like, I don't even want to like give them, yeah, but like, it's already having a hard week.

No, like, I'm thinking that, like, the author of the original ballerina farm article, who then had to like backtrack and is like literally, I can't imagine how she must feel.

Like, she's a contender for me, too, but ultimately, Michaela Skinner took the

two of them can share the crown of

a piece for the author, a piece from Michaela.

Yeah, when you act weenie, like, like the weeniness comes back for you.

Like, I'm sorry, what we are seeing with both of them is like a boomerang of weeniness, you know?

It's a seven-day title, like, it'll be over before you know it, and there's always hope in the future that you could become a queenie.

Like, I could imagine a week where Jonathan Owens was the weenie when he said what he said.

1,000%.

We are constantly giving grace to our weenies.

Yeah, it's

temporary.

Yeah.

So don't get down if you find yourself the weenie of someone's week.

You can always bounce back.

A thousand percent.

So thank you for everything, you know?

Yeah, thank you for everything as well.

I'll see you in two minutes.

Love you guys so much.

So excited to see you all tonight at the Beacon Theater for everyone who's coming.

And at our next and final show.

Final Gizno.

Atlantic City.

We're going out with a bang.

We are.

We have a couple of big things in store.

We do.

Atlantic City, like, it's different than anywhere else we've ever performed.

And we're going to give that energy to Atlantic City.

No, sorry.

I totally forgot.

We have like a kind of like something major.

Yeah, I'm very excited.

We're gonna be matching apparently showgirls.

Oh, yeah, surprises, songs, dancing.

It's gonna be so much fun.

So, if you wanna plan like one last girly weekend for the summer, this is it.

Plus, Atlantic City is so lit.

Like, everything.

We're just one small part of that.

It is

on sale now.

So, the toastpodcast.com slash tour.

We're got a casino.

I'll see you August 17th.

Jax, I'll see you in 30 seconds.

Thank you so much for listening to the Toast.

The Millennium Morning Show, where we deliver the fast fast stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So, if you're watching this on YouTube, please forget to subscribe and give us a video a thumbs up.

We're also available, podcast and we're podcasting me found out.

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Love ya.

Bye.