Gaylor Kaylor: Wednesday, July 24th, 2024

Good morning, millennials.

And welcome.

Welcome to the morning toasts.

Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome.

Welcome, welcome.

Having my headphones on and like hearing my own voice is, yeah, there is ultra.

Oh, that's really something.

Something

negative.

Ooh, okay.

Like, that was really mean.

That register, that register, I could just, yeah.

I think that's painful.

Okay, who else hears that sound?

An immediate first thought, the grudge.

I saw that movie when I was a kid, and I seriously was never the same.

So when I said something negative, I would say the grudge is something negative.

But I don't think that's what you were referring to.

Let's be real with myself.

I wasn't referring to the grudge per se, but I was referring to the register, which I think is universally a negative register.

Okay, register.

Okay, university registrar.

I am the registrar.

Let's talk about the word registrar and how nobody knew it until they went to college.

And still, we don't know it.

We just know it's the office called the registrar.

And it's so ugly, that word, registrar agreed i don't i don't like it yeah i feel like every you know every day around these parts not within us but just in the world like there's a referendum on certain words like they're canceled they're done manhole

exactly

history

His hurst is, I would say.

I think it's time for registrar.

Do your thing.

Do your thing.

Wow, today's episode immediately went on a tangent I wasn't expecting.

That's what you can expect at the toast.

Expect the unexpected.

Get ready to

get comfortable getting uncomfortable.

Are you uncomfortable?

No.

But that's what we do here.

We question things.

We make people uncomfortable.

Is it?

A thousand percent.

We are constantly questioning things.

Never stop asking why.

I feel like we make people very comfortable.

No, I don't think so.

Comfortable being themselves.

No, we have them look inward.

We are constantly

finding comfort in the discomfort.

Okay.

A thousand percent.

I've been very comfortable, though.

Maybe I need to get uncomfortable.

Maybe you do.

Maybe I will.

Maybe she will.

Actually, I'm pretty uncomfortable.

My tissue is always hurting on this couch.

It's actually so true.

Like in a physical sense, we are definitely always uncomfortable here.

Always rearranging our legs, our butts.

If you watch on the YouTube, like you could see that we're not.

Here I go.

We're not comfortable.

We're

body checking.

Body checking, posture checking,

physical discomfort checking constantly.

That's so true.

Like I said, get comfortable being uncomfortable.

But I hope wherever you are, dear listener, that you're comfortable and you're having a wonderful Wednesday

as you usher yourself into the latter half of the week.

It's an extremely gloomy Wednesday where we are, giving very much, you know, summer chilly,

summer showers.

It's giving, you know, that scene and something's got to give when they come in from the rain.

And she's wearing the cardigan and then her and Jack goes and have sex and needs to cut the cardigan off.

Sure.

You know that scene.

So Jackson and I had an amazing day yesterday.

It included a little bit of grand larceny.

Grand larceny.

Because we stole Wi-Fi.

We still Wi-Fi.

I'm just kind of sick, like I said yesterday, sick of this studio, particularly the Wi-Fi in this house being like the lowest Wi-Fi you could pay for.

Not to shade the landlord, but like seriously, like loosen the purse strings.

I mean, it's clear that he doesn't run a digital business because if he did, then he would know what it's like to have shitty Wi-Fi, but he doesn't.

He doesn't.

So I just kind of, we took matters into our own hands.

Jax and I drove to the local library.

One, because it's always a great place to, you know, hang, love the local library.

But two, if anyone's going to have, you know, Wi-Fi they're giving out for free, it's going to be the local library.

Then Then we showed up and it really wasn't up to, for lack of a better word, speed.

And we had to take matters into our own hands yet again.

What did we do?

Actually, Jackie was the one who did it.

She was just like fucking around.

She unplugged some shit.

We brought our own Ethernet cord.

Yeah, we don't mess around.

And Jack's just sort of like...

broke one of the library computers, plugged our shit in.

Unplugged the Ethernet from the library desktop.

I plugged it in to Claudia's laptop and then we plugged it back into the computer.

Yeah, but like when we unplugged it from the library computer, it like had this like big blue memo on it.

Please contact library staff no narc no i mean no because we did that i know but i thought for sure like with that error message you would send like a little notification to the tech department at the library and somebody would show up being like what's wrong with this computer and then seeing me like siphoning internet well there's nothing wrong like it never doesn't there's no sign that says like don't unplug the ethernets and use for your own computer i feel like it's an unwritten rule i feel like they would applaud to industrious women i would think so and what i do like about this library which we saw the cons in the sense that they didn't have the greatest Wi-Fi and we had to get the Ethernet, is that it's more of an old school library.

I was saying to you how it looks like it hadn't been updated like since the 90s in a positive way.

It's more like slow-living library.

I think a lot of libraries today are

a little too modern.

They're a little too modern for my liking.

I understand in a lot of different ways.

I don't visit as many libraries.

And this library like reminded me of a library from our childhood.

So all is to say, like, I don't think there was an alert message sent to the IT department.

Like, I don't think that they're on that level in a positive way.

That's good.

And we put everything back the way we found it.

But if you noticed, yesterday's episode was up a little bit faster, especially on the YouTube.

Yeah, it's because of a little thing we like to call grand larceny.

It's because of the library and it's not grand larceny because our taxpayers pay for the libraries.

And you could say, well, Jackson Club, you're renting.

You're not paying taxes for this library.

And we could say, yes, well, our rent covers our landlord's taxes and he's paying the taxes that go to the library.

No, and we actually pay utilities.

So like we do.

Yeah, maintenance.

Like, no, he's using it to pay his tax bill.

And that's the next next circle of life.

I am a New York state resident.

So I just.

You're paying for, but like you're I pay state taxes.

Yes.

I, does it go to one big pool or is it county specific?

I am not even going to try and understand what the hell they do in that office.

I just don't believe that like your New York City taxes are going to pay for like a local country library.

Well, I think they're paying for the New York public library.

Who's who's to know?

Who's to know?

It's one big pot.

Who knows where?

Who knows?

All that to say, I think we're going to have to have a library again today if the Wi-Fi keeps acting up.

Twist my arm.

Yeah, a library is nice.

I feel like every now and then we have like a referendum, if you will, on libraries.

And it's nice.

And it was busy too.

You always think a library is just this like thing nobody goes to.

Yeah.

Let me tell you, it was popping.

And not just like now through you, I realize libraries are great places for kids.

And we saw a bunch of kids,

a lot of strollers, but it's all, you know, people of all demographics rolling through for whatever reason.

Yeah.

It was nice.

Kind of a melting pot, if you will, of the community.

No, a library is a great resource.

I've, you know, talked ad nauseum about my appreciation for libraries.

But also when watching lessons in chemistry, I think Elizabeth Zopp places a lot of emphasis on libraries, too.

They're used like as reference centers for Mad, who's trying to find information about her dad.

But also when Elizabeth is trying to give that woman tips for following her dreams and becoming a doctor, she's like, start at the local library, like pick up a book.

No, nobody is doing more for the PR of libraries.

than books themselves.

There's always, and the movie Matilda, of course, we know she took herself to library every day, but there's always some like, you know, genius kid from a broken home spending his afternoons at the library and whatever book you're reading.

And you know what?

It's nice.

It is nice.

And I feel like now because of the internet, people think like, you don't need a library.

Oh, I can read a book on my phone.

I can Google anything.

No.

Yeah.

It's not the same.

No, it's not.

And I follow some librarians on TikTok and like the job of a librarian is super interesting to me because you would think it's like a job you don't really need a special skill set or education for, but it's actually complete opposite.

You think you just like tell people where the bathroom is.

You think you just fell out of a coconut tree and became a librarian?

No, no, no.

No.

It requires a great breadth of knowledge.

Yeah.

A Dewey Decimal system.

A Dewey Decimal.

You know, who's the number one fan of the Dewey Decimal System?

Dana Holtzberg.

Oh, well, I guess she's tied for first with Sheldon Cooper.

Young Sheldon Cooper.

I mean, she is Sheldon Cooper.

Correct.

And then I read that book by Sally Hepworth, The Good Sister, where The Good Sister was a librarian.

She took her job extremely seriously and she really explained like why, you know, librarians do what they do and why they're such integral parts of the community.

So also to say, when people ask like, what kind of job would you want to have if you weren't doing this?

I never really know what to say.

I always joke and say I'd be a vet, but just for rip, I used to say Theo.

Now I feel like maybe add to the list a job I might want to do.

Librarian.

Yeah, I also feel like maybe the break room, it's on and poppin' in the break room.

Because whenever I think of jobs, I would want, I need to know what like the office culture is like.

And I feel like that's something I've really, we miss out on.

A thousand percent.

And one of the very few cons of like what we do is community culture is at a zero.

Well, that's true.

It's only summer.

Like, it's just different.

And we don't have just like coworkers that are gabbid.

Totally.

Office drama.

And that we talk about the other coworkers with.

And I feel that.

100%.

We have a different kind of office culture and it's wonderful.

But we don't have like a break room per se.

I think a physical space for like a teacher's lounge, if you will, a break room.

I think that that is where like true memories are made.

And we don't have that.

And that's definitely sad.

But I think the break room in a library.

What I was going to say is I think amazing snacks are always coming into the library.

I I feel like people like.

You think so?

I don't know why.

I feel like it's a place like, don't eat here.

Oh, that's actually so true.

There was a sign by the computers.

It said no beverages.

I was eating a banana, so I was fine.

Yeah, but I just feel like it's not like they're giving away snacks.

You can't like expect a pastry or anything.

I don't know why it's just very bare-bones.

There would be like a box of donuts like every day.

No, then your hands would be sticky and you're touching the materials.

I think it's the opposite.

They're not encouraged.

Like, of course, don't starve, but we're not going to encourage food consumption.

So then maybe the life of a librarian isn't the life for me.

Perhaps.

Like I think a job where like there are sweet treats abound, just like all the time, maybe it's like a teacher that I feel like parents bring in for birthdays, where there are like boxes of donuts just regularly being dropped off in the break room.

That's a job that I would love to have.

Teacher.

Teacher.

You could always run over to the cafeteria.

Yeah.

Chat up a lunch lady, maybe get a little something.

Yeah.

Well, actually, did you see that Theo Von had like a three-hour episode he came out with with the lunch lady?

He like, him and his team like surveyed the nation.

They wanted to interview like a classic lunch lady.

And they found like, I don't know where they found this woman.

Her name was Melissa.

She had so much character.

And he did like a really in-depth interview about being a lunch lady.

And what that entails.

And he had, they had found someone with like so much experience and who had worked her way up.

She's kind of like, I think she was like the overseer of catering at this point.

For one school?

For one school, she actually just moved schools.

So she's familiar with the district like in general.

But yeah, for one school.

It was hilarious.

First of all, she was cracking herself up.

Like, and she had had this really sort of like smoker's coffee laugh.

And she was just howling.

Me and Ben listened to it on a long car ride like a couple of weeks ago.

We were cracking up, laughing so hard.

And you know what?

I actually learned a lot.

I want to listen to this.

That's so, that's such a good concept.

I know.

Me and Ben were saying like the idea of not only scouring the nation and finding like a really classic lunch lady, but then giving them the platform and giving like the respect.

And like, it's a serious job.

Like she's responsible for like hundreds of kids.

And there are a lot of kids from low-income households she was talking about who come in early for breakfast.

Like a lot of these kids, all the meals that they get are from this one particular lady.

And he talks about, you know, do you have favorites?

It was really, it was hysterical.

It was also extremely interesting.

I need to listen.

It was amazing.

And then she also talked about how, you know.

lunch has changed in the public school system over the years.

Now it's much more health conscious than it was at the time.

What are they serving these days?

Well, it's always, there's always a pizza day.

And there's always, you know, the more things change, the more they stay the same.

Pizza Day is always like the most popular day.

But with hot breakfast, they go like pancakes.

They go legit.

She was like saying, that's healthy.

Oh, no, but I mean in terms of like well-rounded, like they have all the categories, like fruit, protein, bread, like really food pyramid energy.

Okay.

And they used to have just slop.

Got it.

It was really fascinating.

I didn't listen to the whole thing, but I would listen to like a full-blown hour and a half of this lady talking.

She was so funny.

Oh my God.

And how she just sort of fell into the lunch lady lifestyle.

Yeah.

She had said she had gotten pregnant.

You know, the guy was not a good guy.

So she just sort of, you know, pulled herself up by her bootstraps, went to the local school looking for work.

Boom, lunch lady.

A queen was born.

That's an amazing story.

Yeah, it really was.

Wow.

Okay.

Like, I don't want to do this podcast.

I want to go listen to that one.

How can we top that?

You guys better stay here, by the way.

Yeah, no, not me, like, promoting the hell out of this podcast.

Like, sit down and listen and then go over to Theobon.

Yeah, just like me.

Okay.

If I have to be here, so do you.

I will keep you here until four.

Yeah.

The bell doesn't dismiss you.

I dismiss you.

Also, not true.

Romeo has joined us in the studio today.

Hello, my love muffin angel hey ro don't you on these cords oh my god claude that's a problem remember like you said when you when someone steps on it you know we just we got to monitor this the studio is in flux we only have like four or five more episodes here we just it's a make-it-work moment as it always is in life today we've got a great show because we're back together it's hump day a beautiful day we're back together after a night's sleep apart and how was that how was that night's sleep it was better than usual what was your sleep score oh great question i think i had a good sleep score i I slept good.

I slept long.

I slept hard.

I slept better than I've been sleeping.

89.

That's not great.

That's like weird.

Why isn't yours like 99?

I guess because I woke up, like, I didn't get that much sleep.

I went to bed at 11 and I woke up at 7.45.

Okay.

That's like eight and a half hours.

That's a shit ton of sleep.

No, yeah, that's pretty solid.

What'd you get?

My sleep score is in 80.

I've got the rhythm, they said.

No, your sleep score is a 90.

Oh, my sleep score was a 90.

Wow.

But your readiness is an 80.

Yeah.

My sleep store is an that's pretty good for me.

Like great for me, honestly.

Yeah.

So it's also Wednesday, which means we have dear toasters.

I have read the submissions.

We have a crazy update, like really crazy.

And then

the swirlies are having a hard time this summer.

I'll say that.

It's not just us.

It's not just us.

The mold is sort of nationwide and it's not on your side.

No.

Okay, so let's get into it.

Sure.

Help the swirlies.

Sure, sure, sure.

Without further ado about a better podcast than ours, here are the fast five stories that you need to know.

And the fast five stories that you need to know, bear with me.

Just got a lot of balls in the air, are brought to you, oh, by Splash Refresher.

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It's not something I really can do.

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So thank you, Splash Refresher, for sponsoring today's episode.

Today's episode is also brought to you by BetterHelp.

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Comparison is the thief of joy.

And it's easy to envy other people's lives, especially through the lens of social media.

So important to always remember what you see in someone's life is really not always what's going on.

And comparing, like I think it was a great Teddy Teddy Roosevelt who once said, is the thief of joy.

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I also, you just reminded me, well, this ad just reminded me that one of our deer toasters today is a sourdough conundrum.

So who are you going to call?

It's Jackie.

Yeah, for sure.

How could you have, I mean, we'll find out.

Yeah.

Our first story, Celine Dionne is set to perform at the Olympics opening ceremony, and rumors are swirling that she is going to be paid a lot of money.

So TMZ reported that Celine Dionne will perform on Friday at the opening ceremony for the 2024 Olympics in Paris, and organizers have opened the vault for her.

The icon touched down in Paris on Monday, and sources with direct knowledge tell TMZ she is getting ready to take the stage on Friday.

TMZ sources say she will be paid handsomely, $2 million.

By the way, that's just for one song.

In addition to her fee, the Olympics are footing the bill for travel, and they're told between her jets, her family, boats, and other expenses, they're paying a ton of money, a ridiculous amount.

However, page six reported this morning that the rumors that she's going to be paid $2 million are false and that she will actually actually not receive a fee for the performance.

Okay, to me, like the interesting part of the story is not that, like, how much she's getting paid.

It's the fact that Celine Dion is like coming out of, not retirement, but she's not performed live in many, many years.

I did see her documentary.

If you saw it on Prime Video, you know why she's been dealing with like this crazy neurological disorder.

And to me, that's more interesting.

It's always so funny how like all these

the countries when they're hosting like they pull out all the stops for their opening ceremonies.

It's a way of like, it's like a dick measuring contest for everyone.

And I don't know like why they chose Celine because she's not French.

She's Canadian, French Canadian, but still.

So it's not like she's like, I think it's still a big dick move in a positive way.

Like we got Celine.

Right.

She's not even born here.

Even though like is French Canadian

allegiance, but it's also like Canada's part of the Commonwealth.

So are they British?

Yeah, they're kind of giving like untethered energy.

I'm not 100% sure in the history and I'm not going to pretend to know.

But I think it's like, you know, we got Annie, we got Celine.

You would think that the hosting country would use this as an opportunity to like, you know, show their most famous person.

Who's the most famous like French person?

Is Andrea Bocelli French or is he Italian?

That would have been a good one.

Most famous French person.

I mean, I have to Google this because most famous French singer.

They should have that person who won Eurovision.

Voila, voila.

Yeah, that's a good one.

Edith Piaf, rip, though.

Okay.

So rip.

That's not what I was was thinking.

Like, um,

do any of these anti-I feel like when it comes to like producing big-time singers, France is not like, I feel like they do more acting.

Famous French pop singers.

Edith Piaff, again.

Just kind of getting Edith, you know.

So we're going to stay with, oh, David Gueta.

Honestly, for the vibe of what an Olympic opening ceremony usually is, that would kind of be amazing.

And then he could then bring out, he has so many of like the biggest hits in the world with like Bibi Rexa, like all of his girlies, Sia.

Yeah.

Or he could just play them.

They don't need to bring everyone.

I have to imagine, actually, David Guetta will be involved.

I think so too.

But that's really crazy that they don't have that much

by the way of like pop artists.

Right.

Contributions to the music.

He's a French DJ.

He's French.

And don't get me wrong, like French music is a genre.

And I'm not referring to French music.

I'm talking about the biggest hits, like the Beyoncés, the Taylor Swifts.

Yeah, of France.

Right.

And French music.

Yeah, like music in French.

Oh, I like that song.

It's also very.

That's France, right?

I feel like it might be Italian.

I think, perhaps.

Lovey and Rose, you know, comes to mind.

Well, I had also, speaking of Lovie and Rose, like the most recent, the baddest to do it most recently in a positive way.

Yeah.

Lady Gaga.

And I saw rumors that people think she's performing at the Olympics open ceremony.

I don't know when Olympic ceremonies just became like the Super Bowl, like who's coming out, because usually it's like about the athletes.

And I do feel like it should be about pride and, you know, patriotism patriotism and the athletes themselves and it's nice to have a person like national pride you mean yeah yeah and I also don't recall like it's like every country walks out right well I feel like in the last few years

it's been the opening ceremonies haven't been as pussy popping pussy popping because in the countries like don't go for such no popping of the puss and it's been like kind of political because it was like China and they were just like trying to like show their dick like they show like their vibe like this is what we do over there they have other things that they're trying to show and then it was like Sochi, Russia, energy.

So, yeah, I guess it depends also on the geopolitical landscape.

But one of the most iconic Olympics in my lifetime, or maybe it was just the age that I really was able to participate, was the London Olympics.

Spice Girls came out.

That was major.

Huge.

What did we do in Salt Lake City?

What did we do in Salt Lake City?

Because that was the last time America hosted, right?

I think so.

Let's see.

Opening ceremony.

Like, who was the big performer?

Took place at the Rice Eccles Olympic Stadium.

That's good.

It was produced by Don Mitcher.

The production team included Kenny Ortega as the artistic director, Mark Waters as the musical director.

Oh, so it was obviously amazing.

And it was nominated for an Emmy for Outstanding Variety.

Okay, I'm loving what I'm seeing so far.

Oh, my God.

Kenny Ortega is seriously like his, by the way, here we go.

Wait, here's, we need to add to the list, like, of people always ask, like, who are your dream guests?

And we have, like, obviously, like, Taylor or Kim.

We need

like an

a sit-down.

I completely agree.

Because, did you know Kenny Ortega also did, like, dirty dancing?

Like, he's not just like a Disney

Kenny Ortega.

He needs to be on our list of like people we really need to talk to.

Yeah.

Here's who performed.

The opening ceremonies included Leanne Rhimes singing Light the Fire Within, which was the Olympics, official Olympics song from the 2002 Olympics.

Then Michael Kamen and Brian May did an orchestral piece.

Okay.

Then Gold was sung.

By Shana Marie Shea.

By Linda Edder.

Okay, sounds like a flop so far.

Continue.

Yeah, John Williams composed a five-minute work for orchestra and chorus, Call of the Champions.

The Utah Symphony and featured the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and the Madeline Choir School.

Sounds chilling.

Dimitri Shoshkovoch's Symphony Number Five.

Igor Stravinsky's The Firebud Suite.

So I do want to say, though, I feel like when the Olympics were in America, the vibes vibes of the opening ceremony was very much like we're showing off American pride.

It wasn't like pop, it wasn't a paradise.

It was a spectacle.

And I think it's definitely the bar has been raised, you know, when it was in Rio.

I know, because, you know, Rio Carnival, like it's such, like, their culture is so

colorful and like

loud.

And I think that it really raised the bar forever.

And I remember that one.

But I think when we hosted, I don't want to clown on America because we can do better than that.

I don't think that was the vibe of it, it was more,

you know, pared down.

That's the perfect perfect way of saying it.

I agree with that.

And so the big name was Leanne Rhymes.

Who is truly

America's sweetheart?

She's not the, but she's one maybe at one point in time, yes.

Yeah.

Before Brendi Glanville

sort of showed us who she was.

Yeah.

Kind of overshadowed.

Yeah.

All is that to say, love this moment for Celine Dionne.

I have been looking forward, like every day when we're like, you know, sitting on the couch being like, what should we watch?

I'm like, wait, is it Olympic ceremony?

Like, I am so looking forward to this.

It's friday i know i am so looking forward i'm so glad that it's not on the night of gizno because one thing about gizno every single gizno that we've had has been on like a major national event it's i actually have been thinking when i when i was thinking of my week this week i'm like okay i have gizno and i have the olympic ceremonies please don't tell me they're on the same night right but it's classic us for them to be on the same night because we are constantly at the cornerstone of all things popular yeah or

there's like a lot of big things that happen because we also were throwing the espies in there however if not for Gizno, like we wouldn't care that the Esbes were on.

Yeah, but it's like you can't miss something you never had.

Yeah.

Type of energy.

I'm so looking forward to the Olympics.

I'm so looking forward to the opening ceremonies.

I was looking forward before I knew Celine was performing, but the fact that they got like one of my favorites who also hasn't been heard from vocally in many years,

it's amazing.

One song, what song is it going to be?

Is it going to be in French?

She does sing in a multitude of languages.

Not to be like, you know, xenophobic or whatever.

Please sing in English for me.

Like, I just like English.

I could do a little bit of both.

No, like, I know it's France.

Like, that's so great for you guys, but like, please.

She's going to sing French.

You think?

At least a word of it.

Yeah.

Oh, maybe she'll do one of her most popular songs in French.

That would be fun.

I feel like she'll do a verse in French.

Yeah.

I don't know any of her non-English songs.

Once again, me being toxically English or whatever.

Maybe she'll even sing the national anthem.

Oh, that would be pretty.

What is the French national anthem?

It's not one I know.

No, it's not one I know either.

I think it goes like this.

Corporio P.

That's Italian.

Sin

sagice.

That's what I think it is.

Okay, we'll find out on Friday.

Wait, we didn't record backup audio.

Are we worried?

Oh my god, that's classic us.

I'll just start now.

Yeah.

Because if we got comfortable, if we record backup audio, then our original audio will work.

It's just how karma works.

Okay, thank you.

Speaking of karma, are you ready for our next story?

Is it my boyfriend?

No, it's your girlfriend.

Okay.

It's about Taylor.

Well, I didn't mean it like this, but and Carly Kloss.

Oh my God, she's being toxic.

I didn't mean it like that.

And also, I don't even think that they used to date girlfriends.

You don't believe in the gay lore lore.

No, the Kore, what do they call it?

Well, it's gay lore and Kaylore.

Like Taylor Gay and Taylor and Carly.

Okay, I don't believe in Kaylore lore, but Carly Kloss is making a rare comment about Taylor Swift after attending the Arist Tour.

So she did a big interview with Yahoo Life.

Wait, Carly attended the Arist Tour?

Yeah, remember in LA and she was like, oh, like a while ago.

Yeah.

And she was in a seat.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like a

interview with Yahoo Life, and she was asked to pick a favorite.

That's weird.

Yeah.

And she was asked to pick a favorite song off of Tortured Poets Department album.

Also a weird question, given everything.

And she said, no, either the interviewer was trying to start stuff or the interviewer seriously knows nothing.

Yeah.

She said, I'd say the whole album.

I mean, her music is classic.

Okay, tell me you've not listened to the album without telling me.

And then as for her favorite of all of Taylor's songs, Carly said, she's got so many hits.

I definitely love Shake It Off.

Ooh, okay, well, let's keep in mind, Carly Kloss is a mother, and Shake It Off is like a big popular song with the kids.

Yeah, she's probably watching these things.

Right.

She's probably like have to listen to that song a thousand times being like, oh, this girl used to be my friend.

She's your girlfriend.

They could seriously never make me believe there's not bad blood between these two.

I'm sorry.

No, there is because as I was reading this article and they were rattling off all the things that they used to do together, one thing that I had completely forgotten about slash maybe even never knew, is that they did a Vogue cover together.

Oh, yeah.

That's like the pinnacle of it all in Montecito.

And it was like this beach-themed shoot.

And

the subheader, it's like Taylor and Carly, unstoppable, inseparable, adorable.

Well, Vogue, they've been separated.

You know, you don't go from like that to then never being together ever again.

And there's not bad blood.

You just don't.

And every girl knows that.

And there was a time where like Taylor stopped doing like the BFF things publicly because she got a lot of flack for it.

But she's very much like in her bestie era like gg blake lively kelly taylor like even though she didn't do the squad thing anymore she still has been doing her best friends

and like blake lively has been around since the carly days hyme have been around

so it's carly one of these things is not like the other and it's carly and i think every now and then they try because taylor Carly also went to reputation and there was a, they were, there was a braggis.

There was like a big fight.

They weren't weren't talking.

Then she went to reputation tour, and everybody was like, what?

Then they never spoke again.

And then a lot of music came out.

Right where you left me is so Carly Claus coated, especially because, as far as I know, that's the only one of Taylor's friends who married a Jew.

And there's a line in there about, you know,

smashed glass under the cloth, like literally about a Jewish wedding.

Oh my god.

Let me find the lyric because I'm botching it.

What?

Yeah.

Okay, right where you can.

And Carly had a small wedding, right?

Like Taylor wouldn't have been there.

I mean, if they were friends, she would have been there.

But I feel like it was one of those like two people and a witness sort of thing.

When I felt the moment stop, glass shattered on the white cloth.

Everybody moved on.

I

stayed there.

Glass shattered on the white cloth.

I need to see all the lyrics.

And of course, it could be like, yeah, you broke a cup on a tablecloth.

It could be.

Friends break up, friends get married.

Oh, okay.

Carly.

But it's about a marriage.

Strangers get born.

Strangers get buried.

Sure, whatever.

Trends change.

It's funny how like one lyric can mean something and the rest.

I'm like, discard.

Trends change.

Rumors fly through new skies.

But I'm right where you left me.

Matches burn after the other.

Pages turn and stick to each other.

Wages earned and lessons learned.

Wages.

That's a weird word to use.

Well, I think it also has to do with Carly being close with Scooter.

Yeah.

But I am right where you left me.

Help him sell the restaurant.

Still sitting in a corner I haunt.

Cross-legged in the dim light.

They say, what a sad sight.

It's where you could hear a hairpin drop right when I felt the moment stop.

Glass shattered on the white cloth.

That would have been when she got married.

Everybody moved on.

I stayed there.

Dust collected on my pinned-up hair.

They expected me to find somewhere, some perspective, but I sat and stared.

So that's tough because who, what kind of friend feels that way about a friend getting married?

Right.

That it's giving Gaylord Gaylord.

Right, right, right, right.

But she said, friends move on, friends get married.

And I really don't think.

And do people like to date people who look exactly like them?

They are twins.

And especially in that era of Taylor's life.

Yeah, she looked so much like her.

Do people like that?

I don't know.

Maybe it's like a sort of like

selfish, like, egotistical thing.

But Taylor's not like that.

No, no, but I think everyone has different like types and tastes.

And is there a type that like wants to date your twin?

There's only, I don't believe that Galor, Kalor folklore, but there is

one compelling argument, and I just need to find the song.

Dress.

No, I don't think that one's about her.

Hold on.

Give me two seconds.

It's going to take me a while.

Okay, but we could go down this rabbit hole all day long, and I stay out of it.

You do.

I think it's from, hold on.

There is a Taylor song where a lyric,

just give me two seconds, like it's important.

We were just talking about this phenomenon, which when two best girlfriends and a friend gets a boyfriend.

We were, yes.

And the girl, the girl without a boyfriend is kind of like, hey, look at me.

And it's like, girl, grow up.

Like, you're not meant to be.

Yes, we talked about this on the toast.

No, we talked about it.

No, no, I know, but we also talked about it on the toast.

Because we were having this conversation because I was saying on TikTok, it's like this whole thing about like girls, girls, like if you get a boyfriend and you see your friends less, like you, the TikTok generation, they're always talking about it.

It's like, well, you're not a girl's girl.

And you obviously like are a loser.

Like, and I just don't like that because I think

when you meet someone who's going to be your partner and your husband and the father of your child, like that should take up most of your time.

Yeah.

And your priority shift.

And you obviously shouldn't leave your friends behind.

But like the amount of time you spend with your friends is different when you're single and young versus when you get older and have a partner.

Yeah.

No.

And I think that's a normal thing that happens.

And I think a lot of friendships grow through this, especially when you have a closer-than-most female friendship.

Right.

Okay, I think I found,

and I think that's what this was: not Gaylord Kalore.

Okay, the only compelling Gaylord Kalor argument that's ever been made, and there's so much lore about lyrics.

I'm not going to get into it, but the vault song, The Very First Night, there is a line that like really feels like it was changed because, okay, it goes like this:

Didn't Didn't read the note on the Polaroid picture.

They don't know how much I miss you.

And the lyric would make way more sense if it had originally been written, they don't know how much I miss her.

No, Polaroid picture.

Yeah.

They don't know how much I miss her.

Like that rhyme.

Sure, but she could have said, yeah, by the way, picture, you're.

Yeah, I'm just saying, like.

And by the way, she can miss her friend who she had that unnaturally close girl friendship with.

No, and Taylor has like recently for the first time ever sort of acknowledged like these crazy rumors.

I think it was like when she released a statement before putting out 1989 and she was like, I

have been like dragged for X, for Y, and I've been dragged for having no friends, been dragged for having too many friends, and I've been dragged for being too close to certain women.

Like she acknowledged it head on for the first time ever, being like, and it's false and it's stupid.

And the people who believe it like can't like seriously can't be deterred.

It's not true.

The more we talk about it like the more i can see it i think taylor was the friend who was left behind when the best friend got a boyfriend and taylor's also like a serious artist who writes about her feelings and it's not like taylor didn't have boyfriends while she was with carly but it was never more important than carly because it wasn't the real deal oh oh i see it why how you're bringing that back full circle now so you don't think the gay lord laura is real you think she is writing about carly but about the breakup of a friendship and but they were one of those friendships that was like one of those you know we have dinner together every night like we have sleepovers and then when you get get a boyfriend, it's like, no, we're having dinner together every night.

We're having sleepovers.

So Taylor is kind of like, has that ex sort of feeling, but they weren't in a relationship, but she's writing about it heartbroken.

Oh, you know, that's actually a really good analysis.

I like that.

Like a heartbroken friend.

And also, I think the reason why, so they're not friends anymore because Taylor was heartbroken by that.

And like,

but I think it maybe changed the way that Taylor looks at friendships.

And now she maybe has better, healthier friendships with women like all of the friends she still has now.

But like Carly bore the brunt of her interesting experience that's interesting of her learned experience okay professor she kind of exists in the context of all of which that came before yeah gay lore kaylor yeah no gay lore kaylor is like not a thing okay well i'm glad that in terms of this actual interview that was the story we were talking about uh big nothing burger and only fuels my belief that these two fucking hate each other Yeah.

I mean, they're all really good.

Like you obviously haven't listened to it.

So.

Yeah.

Or if you have, you don't want to give a specific answer because then it shows the person that you hate that you're listening to their music.

Oh, but she went to her concert.

Yeah.

That's the only thing.

No, but I think like, it's like, oh, no, there's no bad blood.

Like we're technically fine.

We just like don't want anything to do with each other anymore, you know?

Yeah.

And I do think for the sake of the public, like Carly goes to these things to keep that

belief.

Like, there's no bad blood.

Yeah.

Look, she went to a concert.

Yeah.

So that's why she goes.

No, or it's like, I like, I would enjoy myself.

I'm not going to not have a fun night out with my, with my gal pals.

And it's, Taylor Schwift is at this point in her career where she's literally unavoidable.

That's what makes it difficult for like Kim.

You know, she's like always being tied to Taylor.

There's Taylor music in the background.

When you are the culture, it's hard to exist without, you know, it's hard to exist without the context.

Right.

Carly must be experiencing that sort of phenomena currently.

Yeah.

Okay.

Great.

Are you ready for our next story?

Kind of adjacent.

Number three.

Yes, I'm ready.

Kind of adjacent because Josh Allen and Haley Seinfeld finally go Instagram official after one year of dating.

Josh Allen posted a carousel of Instagram images celebrating the first day of training camp.

And I think it was several of his off-season adventures.

It kicked off the carousel with a photo of him and Haley looking at the Eiffel Tower during their trip to Paris for fashion week in March.

Then there's also a photo with his family and she is in it, just like regular, degular.

My that's such a regular picture.

Two of them in the middle of like this birthday party for a one-year-old.

No.

Then there's a photo of Haley walking from behind and I think that's Paris.

It's just like normal, like there's

a normal couple.

I have no particular vested interest in either one of these two individually.

I'm not a big Bills fan.

I don't really know much about Josh Allen's career.

I was following him when he did in the playoffs and I was, I was a fan.

And I, of course, know some of Haley Steinfeld's work.

I wouldn't say I'm a big follower or fan of hers.

I would lay my life out on the line for these two.

I hope I only wish the best for them.

I find myself constantly thinking about them.

I think they are a perfect match.

No, I'm really really obsessed and I often forget that they're together, but when I remember, like it gives me a burst of joy and serotonin.

I completely agree.

And what I would request, I'm going to make a formal request for more, okay?

Like I want Haley at games.

I want her in his jersey number.

Like I want the Taylor Swift.

You want like the

wag experience.

I do.

And I think we deserve it.

And now they're a year under their belt.

Like I think they're so legit.

I hope they get engaged soon.

I just, I want more of this.

I completely agree.

And it really, for me, and I I think for like Bill's mafia, as they say, it's, you know, rising tides, rise all tides.

On my list of teams that like I support theoretically, I would say like because of this, the Bills are top five, maybe.

Like if for me, it goes 49ers, Jets.

But you know, like Bill's fans, there's some drama.

They don't like her.

Because he was dating like a local yokel, I think.

Maybe like threw her to the side for the big star.

I don't want to know the details because it might affect how I feel about these two.

And I don't want how I feel about these two to change.

So seriously, I don't want to know.

Bugger off, okay?

Like I think you had a long time love who everybody loves.

No, please, is it Roger, Robert Herjavek syndrome, like leaving your girl of many years who was there for you when you were nobody for the lady you met on Dancing with the Stars?

Perhaps.

Because if we're going to put a name to this type of syndrome, it's going to be the Robert Herjavec syndrome.

Perhaps.

However, I don't want to hear about it.

Okay.

In the same way you don't want to hear about Robert Robert Rodriguez.

No, but also in the same way Robert Herjave and the woman he met on Dancing with the Stars are OTP.

They have children together.

Like, yeah,

he did the right thing for Robert's self.

Right.

Like, at one, at a certain point, when it comes to Jason Aldean and Britney Aldean, 1,000%, at some point, you can't tell me nothing.

At some point, you have to ship harder than we've ever shipped before.

Yeah.

And I think having kids like Robert Herjback, it definitely, you know.

And he could.

It changes things.

It changes things.

And he has also said, like, it was, he was in a bad place when

he met him, like they were separated, like he was very lonely.

Like, it's not like it was a happy marriage that was broken up.

Not that it, like, I just,

I just, I moved on.

Okay.

I have to say something.

I accidentally just unplugged my microphone for two seconds and plugged it back in.

Like, do you think we're good?

How did you unplug it?

Like, I just pressed this little button.

Why don't you

stop it?

But, like, it's working.

Like, look.

Okay.

And I hear myself.

And it never stopped.

I think it's fine.

I think it's fine.

Okay.

Like, just if you hear past 40-minute mark, like, we're so lust.

So, yes, they have crossed over the Robert Herjivek Rubicon.

No, the Robert Herjavec Herjavec Bridge.

Like, okay, you know, it's like the Robert Herjavec Memorial Bridge.

I agree, except I actually think it should be the Jason Aldean Memorial Bridge because that one, we don't even bring up anymore.

And that's where we famously started saying on the toast, lest we not forget.

I was like, you can take all the Instagram pictures you want.

Like, Brittany Aldean, you were still the other woman.

But at this point, like, she's just the woman, you know?

I have, like, we have to forget.

I actually had to jog my memory to recall.

I know.

Because she's the one who had one marriage before.

She's the one for him.

But he has kids.

from the previous marriage too.

Yeah, and with her.

That's why it was a hard pill to swallow.

Same with Robert Herjavek.

But Josh Allen doesn't have kids.

He wasn't even married.

No, so honestly, whatever happened with the girl before, like, sorry, it's not my problem.

I don't want to know what I'm saying.

I wish her the best.

Like, seriously, details of this do not interest me.

Yes.

Are you ready for our next story?

Do I want to get up, Romeo scratching at the door?

You definitely can't hear it on the microphone.

No, but I don't want him to scratch up the door.

Scratch that scratch.

He stopped.

Okay, continue.

Our next two stories are a bit of book news.

Okay.

First, Cher will release a two-part memoir that finally reveals her true story in intimate detail.

Okay.

Cher is ready to tell all, the goddess of pop, announced Wednesday that she will release a two-part memoir.

After more than 70 years of fighting to live her life on her own terms, Cher finally reveals her true story in intimate detail, reads the description by HarperCollins, the publisher.

The first book, which is 480 pages, hits stores on November 19th, and the second is expected sometime in 2025.

So Cher the Memoir Part 1 will

recall her childhood and marriage to Sonny, detailing the highly complicated relationship that made them world famous but eventually drove them apart.

I feel like a lot of people like are waiting for this book, you know, and they have been waiting.

I am personally not one of them.

I love celebrity memoirs.

Cher isn't someone whom like at the peak I was conscious for.

And now in her, you know, post-peak life like that I follow, I've actually seen her live.

I think she's amazing.

I'm not going to read this book.

I don't, like, this just sort of precedes any,

like, I don't care.

I don't think I'll read this book.

However, I could see myself reading it and then being like invested in Cher.

And that's a journey I'd be happy to go down.

So I will hold space for that.

Harper Collins teased that it's a life too immense for only one book.

It's true.

It's not true.

I feel like there are biographies about Winston Churchill that Martin Luther King, like one book.

It's so true.

And also, there's no page cap.

Doing a thousand-page book.

It's giving money grab, okay?

Actually, that's factual.

There's like anyone can have their biography or memoirs distilled into one book.

And kind of changing like the very sort of cemented, like every book ever written, like, especially in terms of biographies, like have been one book.

And pages, like you said, are limitless.

Changing that and do like a cliffhanger at the end of book one, like it's some sort of fantasy series, like the court of those in roses.

Like, I don't like it.

I don't like it.

Abraham Lincoln

can get into one book.

Yeah.

If he can do it,

it's true.

So, but this is exciting for like the share stands.

I think it's like the gay community and also the older community who were alive and like were probably obsessed with Sonny and Cher and like what went down?

This is going to be massive.

And I understand the inclination to want to, you know, catch every

red dollar.

But I don't know.

It's silly.

And it's like a scary precedent.

Like, is everybody going to do two books now?

No, it's, it's true.

Like, can we just, and I know the book industry is like constantly fighting to stay alive, you know, in this digital age of Amazon.

I think the book industry is having a great run right now between Book Talk, between Kindle's, between the Redheads.

Like, it's all coming up books.

It's true.

it's true, but it's still definitely a tough industry to be in print.

Like, I don't think you can argue against that.

So, I understand they have to get creative at times.

And, like, you know, have to seize a moment.

Like, Cher agreeing to write a book is a moment.

But, like, I don't know.

I don't think we really should be messing with what works.

Yeah.

What's standard?

She said, I've lived too long and done too much.

And so it's like, it should be the encyclopedia.

But, like, the encyclopedias.

Is one book?

One book.

I think it's a book.

She's really one per letter.

One per letter.

Okay.

C.

She's not the encyclopedia.

No.

C, share.

Exactly.

Right.

C is for share.

That's good enough for me.

Is share's name share?

We'll find out in share the memoir part one.

Maybe we'll actually only find out in part two.

Now, let's play our favorite game.

What should she have titled her memoir?

Sharing it all.

I was thinking something like that.

Obviously using share as like a double entendre because what is she doing in the book?

She's sharing with an S.

I shall share.

Hold on.

Sharing is caring.

Yeah, that, that, that.

Sharing is caring.

Okay, great.

But what is it called?

Just share?

Share the memoir part one.

Then share the memoir.

It's part two, and it makes it like serious, but I like when it comes to celebrity memoirs to get creative with the title, of course.

The covers beyond.

Memoirs of a gay shock comes to mind.

It's giving like serious piece of work that you have like on your nightstand.

Yeah.

No, I like it.

Not like a piece of shite celebrity memoir.

You know, it's giving anthology.

Yeah.

Not like, you know, some of them are like

a pamphlet these days.

Yeah.

No, you're getting away with like a book of short stories.

Like how short.

Well, I really like how funny.

If they're funny, funny, I'll allow it.

Agreed.

The only person who, in my opinion, is allowed to continue writing short stories is Gary Giannetti because they get better every time.

Well, Josh Gadd is writing short stories and I'm holding space for those.

Agreed.

Memoirs of an Olaf.

You loved

Tom Segura's book of short stories.

Tom Segura's.

Well,

this wasn't a celebrity book.

You know what?

Actually, I feel like I'm like the perfect demo for a book of short stories.

I should do that more.

Yeah, like you have a short attention.

I don't know why I'm counting on it.

I hate reading long books.

Yeah.

All right.

I just feel like once I finally give a shit about the story they're talking about, it's over.

So true.

That's the problem.

And then we got to start anew.

And I'm like, oh, okay.

With the exception of Gary Giannetti, I think his short stories actually connect to one another.

He's like always referencing like a story that came before.

So good.

Like him working at that restaurant, eating French fries over a trash can.

That's like a short story I cite all the time.

I'm like saying happy birthday to people.

I feel like you always cite his piano lesson one.

What was that?

I don't know.

You like told me to read it.

You were like, he takes a piano lesson.

He's learning Beauty of the Beast or something.

No, Beauty and the Beast is a different short story from New Teeth.

And it's like an analysis on the Beauty and the Beast live action remake and it's hysterical.

Okay, then you always reference the Gary Giannetti short story where he took piano lessons and like was hating it because we had a very similar thing.

Okay, I don't even remember it.

It's and he's coming up with another book.

I need to protest.

Exciting.

Well, our fifth and final story, another celebrity book news.

Oh, wait, I'm sorry.

I've completely lost the plot on what we're doing here today.

Like this is a business

and I'm just acting like it's not.

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And GNC is the most amazing resource.

I actually did not really shop at GNC before I started going on GLP1.

And even now that I'm off of it, it's one of my favorite places to shop.

I can't believe what I was missing out on.

Obviously, the journey with GLP-1 requires a lot of tings.

You know, digestional, let's say that issues are a potential side effect.

And constipation, a fiber supplement, a dietary supplement is hugely necessary.

And shopping at GLP-1, I mean, excuse me, GNC, you'll find the best ones.

Also, nausea.

Nausea is a big thing.

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A lot of people don't.

I love the GNC bars and shakes.

They've released a ton of new stuff this summer, like Little Debbie Cosmic Brownie protein powder, coffee cake protein cookies, skinny peanut butter protein pies.

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Today's episode is also brought to you by the farmer's dog.

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Thank you, Turt.

You're welcome, Bert.

Our fifth and final story, a little more celebrity book news.

One of my favorite actresses

of all time is writing a book, and it is fiction.

Oh, such a unique road to take when people do this.

Obviously, Snookie's fiction book comes to mind.

Kendall and Kylie's fantasy book comes to mind.

Julianne Huff just wrote a fiction book.

Definitely a weird thing to do.

Well, not for me and my fave.

Do you want to try and guess who one of my favorite actresses is?

Emma Roberts, because she's in the book space.

No.

And you love her?

Okay, I don't know then.

That was my only guess.

Okay, Kristen Ritter.

I actually might have guessed that.

I know like a fun fact about you is you love that random girl from the Bibian Apartment 23.

Like I will literally search her on my TV and watch everything that she's in.

Which is so shocking because she does a lot of superhero stuff and you don't fuck with that.

Well, she's Jessica Jones and I like Jessica Jones.

Oh, okay.

She's the show on Netflix that was, of course, canceled before its time because I liked it.

But I did, she, she's also in like a new comic bookie thing.

Orphan Black, which seems too twisted for my taste.

So I'm going to skip that one.

But she's also in Breaking Bad, which everyone knows I didn't watch.

Okay, so you are not a Kristen Ritter fan?

No, I am.

I watch the things that people don't watch.

I support when no one else shows up.

Okay.

Anyways, Kristen Ritter is exploring a dark side of a con artist's mind in her new thriller novel.

So Kristen Ritter is returning to the mystery genre with a new book.

The actress announced exclusively with people that she will publish her second novel called Retreat through Harper Collins.

Big day for Harper Collins.

What was her first book, a memoir or another fiction?

I think another fiction.

Okay, so.

Must have done decent.

Right.

In 2025, the book is co-written with someone else.

She said, I'm really excited about this book.

It's been many years in the making and it's been so fun to write.

So many things I want to note.

First of all, the cover is gorgeous and I have to wonder if that's her.

It looks like her.

It kind of does.

Yes, it does.

And why wouldn't it be her?

She's the type of girl that would be on the cover of a book.

Like, she's got a beautiful perfect face.

Yeah.

I think that celebrities writing fiction is the strangest thing.

And of course, like the flops come to mind.

Like I said, Snooky writing a fiction book about a girl who goes through the Jersey Shore, like was seriously peaked comedy.

Kylie and Kendall.

But a lot of people don't know there are success stories.

You know, Kurt from Glee is the author of this like insanely popular kids, like young adult fantasy series.

It's like a Harry Potter.

It's so popular.

He must be so wealthy.

He never acted again.

He like wrote this one book, it took off.

And he's like huge in the YA fantasy community.

So that is somebody who's done it well.

I think Kristen Ritter doing it now a second time is proof that the first one was probably popular.

I'm not sure of it.

But this is like a weird trope for me.

I have a hard time like understanding.

No, I'll allow it.

Plus, the genre of it, I do feel like is congruent with the work that she does.

And she probably has a lot of experience.

She's probably read a lot of scripts of similar sort of stuff.

So I feel as though she's an expert in the subject matter of thrillers.

Yeah.

And here's the synopsis of the book, which sounds good.

Retreat follows Liz Dawson, a con artist used to blending and used to blending in crowds.

After she's offered a job in the home of Isabel Beresford, a wealthy woman with a villa on the Mexican coast, Liz jumps at the chance for a fresh start and to quit grifting for good.

Wealth.

No, wealth, it does sound good.

And I wouldn't put Kristen Ritter in the bucket of like actresses who write fiction books and flop.

Like you don't get a second book deal if your first book wasn't popular.

Like, literally, you have like a big shit stain on your resume if your book flops.

You'll never get another book deal again because the publisher lost money on you.

Like, you're out.

Yeah, I'm going to make a pledge to read this book.

Okay, you guys, let's hold her accountable.

I've made a pledge.

And even if I'm not in a reading season when it comes out in March, I will choose it for the rest of the day.

I was going to say, you should choose it for the rest of the day.

That forces me to read something that I want to read.

And that's like a collab of the century, the Toast X Redheads.

I love that.

Totally, ex-Kristen Ritter, my fave.

And if you haven't watched Don't Trust the Bee, like, go find it and watch it and treat yourself.

It's literally

such an amazing show.

It's very good.

It's called Don't Trust the Bee in Apartment 23.

And when I re-watched it, it was on a program like a Netflix or something.

I didn't have to purchase it.

Even if you have to buy it on Amazon Prime, I'm going to say it's worth the money.

Wow.

Okay.

She's putting her money where her mouth is.

It's probably what, $30 for a season, $20.

Yeah, these days, like a season of a show has like, it's $24.99.

I think it's worth that.

And then you own it.

You can watch it whenever you want.

How fun for you.

We have a fabulous set of Deer Toasters today.

And let me say this.

Deer Toasters is our weekly advice segment where you can write in to get advice from your girls.

Experiencing something at work, at home, in your relationship, in a friendship that you think you would love to hear from Two Sound of Mind Queens.

Email us, deartoasters at gmail.com.

Thank you.

Or you can write into the toastpodcast.com, our website.

There's a little submission box at the bottom.

Both are anonymous.

And, you know, I think our advice has gone kind of viral because we have people writing in on other people's behalfs.

Ready for this?

This squirrely wrote in because her mom is going through something and her mom said, I want to hear from the girls.

Okay.

Now, if that's not an endorsement.

I don't know what is.

Let's go.

Hello, Jackson Clerd.

I'm writing on behalf of my mom who is wanting your girls' perspective.

My dad has a high-paying job in the financial world.

He often works with other women, but my mom always tags along to events, has never had any issues until something weird happened last week.

Last Saturday, they were out and about shopping when they ran into a woman that is one of in one of his business groups.

It's like a networking group.

They do not work at the same company.

Okay.

My parents ended up grabbing a drink with this lady and things got weird.

She made several comments about how my dad is exactly her type.

If she were to remarry, it would be someone just like him.

She made comments about loving his style, his mannerisms.

She said that he's the only man she'd let boss him around.

My mom was uncomfortable, but she didn't really make any comments.

She sarcastically laughed.

She since has noticed that the lady texts him random things like, happy Father's Day.

Here's the question.

Is she overstepping?

How would you ladies feel?

Should he leave the extracurricular business group?

He said that he would.

Any and all advice is appreciated.

Thanks, ladies.

Yeah, she's overstepping.

Now, it's hard for me to give advice to someone like older than me, so I'm going to think of it as if it were in my, I was in your shoes.

And I feel like it's fair.

I want to say this lady has nothing to worry about because it takes two people to cheat.

And the fact that your husband is sharing with you that this lady from the group is texting him, and should I leave the group?

He sounds like a stand-up guy, but you know, women can be, you know, Jezebels.

Yeah.

And she's trying to worm her way.

She's like, not even being subtle about it.

She's a freak.

And I don't like having close proximity to freaks.

No.

But should he have to leave the group because she is there?

I don't know.

I think he should leave.

Okay.

He offered.

There's other groups.

Right.

But because of like one woman, like.

Or, or, right, right.

Why should he have to suffer for this freak?

Block her.

Yeah.

And then like make her feel weird for being afraid.

How often do the groups meet?

I'm thinking it's something like.

Bi-monthly.

Yeah.

If that.

Maybe like events once a month and like you're there.

I don't think he has to like leave the group and might be a prestigious group because sometimes, like, these groups, you have to have like a certain net worth he didn't get in.

So, I think he should stay in the group, but like, be on alert, block her from his phone.

Don't let him go to those groups' events if it's a social event without you.

And also, um, just monitor, like, he's sharing everything with you.

So, he obviously has nothing to hide.

He's a P jom.

If he stops sharing, like, your red alerts can go on.

But at this very moment, you have a fabulous husband and you have nothing to worry about, but nobody was ever, you know, punished for being prepared.

Yeah.

And And just cautious.

Yeah.

And you don't want to be like insecure and be like, leave the group, block the number.

Jackie's right.

You shouldn't leave the group, especially those groups are probably difficult to get into.

I don't know.

I don't have a high-paying finance job and I'm not a part of any networking groups.

Like, okay, kill me.

Thanks.

Thanks for making me realize

my life sucks.

But yeah, he shouldn't have to leave.

I think it's something like that you work for.

Like you have to

apply.

Yeah.

But block the lady, like make her feel weird.

And this is just something I've been feeling recently.

And in general, we have, have,

as a society, we have kind of gotten rid of shame.

People don't feel ashamed.

They feel empowered.

I think we've empowered a little too close to the sun because this lady obviously read some sort of book or some Instagram meme that was like, go for what you want.

Yeah.

And we need to bring shame back.

This lady needs to feel embarrassed.

And that's an emotion that I don't think a lot of people feel anymore because we've empowered them to just put themselves first.

Yeah.

I'm not into that.

You should feel embarrassed for

acting inappropriately with a married man.

And I think you and your mom and your husband and her husband's goal should be at this very moment to make this old lady feel embarrassed.

And I just want to say, like, if things continue to escalate and you want to engage in a little subterfuge, might I suggest going to the wives of the other husbands in the group?

Oh, I love that.

And letting them know that she's on the prowl.

She's coming for your man.

She's looking for a man in finance, six, five, blue eyes.

And so that everyone, like not like it's a little mean, but if she's behaving this way, she needs to be shut out of the group.

No, I agree.

Like I said, shame is a powerful emotion.

It's a grossly underutilized underutilized emotion.

And let other women help you in this because nobody wants this kind of woman around their husband.

And, you know, I hate to always bring it back to this, but if shame was a more prevalent emotion, I just want to say we'd still have the Dublin portal.

And I think that's something we're really missing out on.

And that's powerful.

Yeah.

Because I don't know today what's going on in Dublin.

And you're suffering because of it.

Our second-tier toasters is one I teased at the early top of the show about her sourdough issue.

Tell me.

Hello, ladies.

I'm a huge fan here with an extremely first world dilemma.

I'm going on a trip soon, and my sourdough starter is in tip-top shape.

It's actually an old world dilemma.

So true.

Very Oregon Trail dilemma, if you will.

We're going on a trip soon.

My sourdough is in tip-top shape.

Would it be crazy for me to pay someone to come to my house and feed it while we're gone?

Yes.

I'm scared to bring it up to my husband because I can only imagine the look he will give me, but he pays for dog sitters while we go on trips.

So is this really all that different?

All to say, please let me know if I'm a trad wifing too close to the sun.

Love you dearly.

Okay, you have two options.

Tell more normal is to leave it in the fridge.

They're going away for a week.

She just said we're going on a trip soon.

Okay, yeah.

Leave it in the fridge.

And when you come back, you give it, you feed it well, maybe twice a day.

It will come back.

Okay.

Reminder, if it can survive the Oregon Trail, it can survive your kids.

Or it depends where you're going.

You take it with you, bring like, you know, 30 grams

and then buy flour and water wherever you are and feed it every day.

To me, that's crazy.

That's the more extreme of the two, but it's less extreme than hiring someone.

Yeah, I don't don't know why we had to jump to hiring.

Do you have a close friend or family member who can just stop by and feed it?

Or you could give it to them.

They don't need to come to your house every day.

How long can a sourdough chill in the fridge?

Weeks.

Oh.

Yeah.

Oh, okay, girl.

You're being crazy.

And even if it gets like the stuff on it that like you can, like sometimes it will get like black stuff on top.

You can just drain it out and keep going.

Okay.

Like it really takes a lot to kill it.

Okay.

I think it could even go months in the fridge.

I think maybe this girl doesn't know that.

Maybe she's new.

Like maybe she was inspired by you.

So keep it in the fridge.

Or you could also keep most of it in the fridge, take a little with you and try and feed it while you're away.

And if you do, if you're not able to do it, you still have your one from home in the fridge.

I think taking it with you is crazier than hiring someone, for real.

I took mine with me here.

Because you were going to make bread.

Yeah.

She's just taking it to feed it, not to make anything.

Either choice is fine.

But if you're traveling a lot or if you're in a house and you can get, you know, you need a scale and you need flour

or just leave it in the fridge.

It will be fine.

And then you'll feed it well when you get home.

I have to imagine she didn't know that the fridge would keep it alive.

Okay.

Okay.

Now you know.

Yeah, you can leave it in the fridge.

Our third and final deer toasters is an update from somebody we read quite recently.

So this was her original issue.

Hi, Jackson Claude.

I love the toast.

I listen every day.

I'm really in need of help.

I slept with my best friend's brother.

It was a drunken night and we've known each other forever.

It was about a year and a half ago.

My sister has been dating him for the past year and now they're engaged.

She has no clue that we slept together.

I feel like it may have meant more than just a drunken hookup.

Do I tell her or let it be?

Sincerely, a toaster who's up with their best friend's brother and soon-to-be brother-in-law.

The update is not what we wanted to hear.

And our advice was what?

Our advice was to just let bygones be bygones.

Like your sister's engaged, like it's not about you.

Like you're not.

And I remember saying like, it wasn't more than what you felt.

Cause you'd be engaged.

Okay, but you were wrong.

This is the update from the sister's fiancé that I had relations with before she got engaged.

We ended up seeing each other at the family's 4th of July party.

He drunkenly came up to me when the fireworks were going off and said, you look so good.

I didn't know what to do or what to say because like I said before, I still have feelings for him.

We ended up making out in the bathroom.

I feel so guilty.

I didn't let anything else happen, but what do I do?

I feel disgusting.

He told me in the bathroom he would end things with my sister if I would marry him.

I have no words.

Please help me.

I really like him, but he's literally engaged to my sister.

Like I said, we as a society need to bring back shame.

Making out with your sister's fiancé is so not okay.

Making out with anyone's fiancé is not not okay.

Doing it to your sister is such another level of betrayal.

Now, you probably have a pit and I don't want to make you feel worse about it, but we do really just need to come to a sort of collective agreement that like this is so not fucking okay.

No, so many things are swirling.

Now that you've made out with him, like you, everybody needs to know everything.

First of all, he's a piece of shite.

So your sister shouldn't be marrying a piece of shite.

And now at this point, your sister needs the information.

I agree.

But we also need to talk about you.

Okay.

Cause you.

you a referendum on you.

Referendum on you.

Grow up, like you had relations with him one time and you've been thinking about him ever since, even though he's literally engaged to your sister.

And if he really wanted to marry, it couldn't be closer to my mouth, Claudia.

No, no, no, no, but I hear you in my ear.

You're just like, um, going out.

Just when you look at me, no, when you look at me, just okay.

So I won't look at you anymore.

I'm gonna literally swallow it.

This fucking bitch.

Like, it's literally up.

I'm just touching.

Like, I am the tech department and I'm actually having a cross-cutting.

So you're saying I can't look at you.

No, if you do, just take your microphone with you.

Exactly.

Literally, exactly.

Go.

I don't like this.

Go.

Okay.

My tushi hurts.

Okay.

We need to talk about the girl.

Yeah, a referendum on the girl.

Seriously, grow up.

Okay.

Because he doesn't want to marry you.

Because if he wanted to marry you, he would have proposed to the sister that he slept with.

Right.

So he just wants to be a piece of shite getting with two sisters.

So now your sister needs to know because all of this is going on.

And now he's.

Right.

You've done so much damage.

You can't do more by letting your sister marry this guy.

And now he's acted poorly within the confines of their relationship.

Whereas before, he's able to do whatever predated whatever them being in a relationship.

So you need to go to her hat in hand, tell her everything.

Like, I don't know what she's going to do.

She can do whatever she wants.

But you are now actively in the wrong by not sharing the information.

Before it had happened before.

But I also think that he's the type of person that goes around kissing people who's not his fiancé.

Yeah, you're not special.

I don't think this is the first time.

It won't be the last time.

It's just a family Fourth of July party.

Like, what is he going to do on his bachelor party?

Yeah.

Oh, God.

Jex is spilling facts.

She's 100% right.

And very sadly, not the only girl he's kissed.

And so you getting like swept up in it, like, that's just sad because it's not you.

Like, it's just, it's not.

And now you've betrayed your sister.

So you act, now you need to actively help.

Yeah.

So let's see what her reaction is.

And we'll take it from there.

But you letting your sister like continue to be engaged and eventually marry this guy, like that is even more of a betrayal than making out with him.

So consider that.

You feel bad about it.

Unless you guys just like aren't that close and you could just let her go and get married and then maybe you guys drift apart.

Because how can you be close to someone when you have this secret?

No, and I don't mean that in a serious, like I'm not like shading you.

Like you can't be close with someone when you have secrets between you.

Yeah.

So if you guys are drifting apart anyway, well, Sayonara.

I also feel like this girl is like,

well, if they break up, maybe I can marry him.

Yeah, no, I think that's that's kind of the most important part here is like, you, unfortunately, in this particular saga are not the main character.

I think you see it as like, this is your one great love.

And like, what's standing in the way?

Your sister and whatever.

But like Jackie said, like, this is the type of guy who makes out with girls a lot.

Like, I think he just wanted to make out.

I don't know if it really had much to do with you.

So I kind of think you need to take yourself out of this and don't see yourself.

You're not caught in this like love trying a world when romance isn't something borrowed.

And would you really want to be with a guy who would cheat on his fiancé with her sister?

No, that's not the guy for you.

Deserve better than that.

This is not your man and it's not her man.

And you need to start helping because

you're actively hurting.

You weren't before.

Nothing wrong with having slept with someone who ends up later on in life.

And nothing wrong with like, okay, so you felt something for him.

You hadn't done anything wrong.

But like you can like, you can move on from feelings.

I feel like people think, well, I like him, so I'm kind of stuck here.

Like, no, get up, get out there, meet someone else.

Put him to the back of your mind.

You'll be okay.

This isn't.

That's what what I mean by grow up.

This isn't pride and prejudice.

Like, it's not a book.

It's not a movie.

It's just the crush.

And if it was more than that, he's your best friend's brother.

You've known him for years.

There was ample opportunity.

You slept together.

Why didn't it go further than that?

There.

Like, you can put him out of your mind, but it requires mental work.

And that's why I say grow up.

And I co-sign everything Jackie just said because she read you to absolute fucking filth.

But I love you and I support you.

Always and forever.

Here for you.

And I want an update because I'm here for you.

But it's tough love that I'm giving today.

Yeah.

And that's required.

And that's when you know that I love you because if I didn't care, I'd say, oh, but he loves you.

You guys, thank you so much for smiling at you.

And thank you to everyone who wrote in, was vulnerable with us, even when we drag you.

Dear toasters at gmail.com.

They write in because they want to.

Because they need to.

They know they need to hear something.

Thank you so much for listening to the Toast on London Morning Show, where we deliver the Fast Five Stories you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So if you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give us a video a thumbs up.

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Love ya.

Bye.