Hey Look At My Belt: Monday, December 4th, 2023

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Good morning, Millennials.

Welcome back to the toast.

Happy Monday.

Has everybody to win?

You aren't doing your regular intonations.

I'm not.

It's Monday, Jax.

It's the holiday season.

I don't know.

I'm just feeling crazy.

You're feeling frisky ever since you posted what you posted on the Gram.

Yeah, so let's talk about that.

Theo is at radiation.

I didn't go this week.

Ben went with his.

Prayers up for do.

Let's start with you.

Monday morning, prayers up for due.

That's important.

And just know, like, I am giving everything I have to Theo's treatment.

And

spiritually,

financially, we understand.

So I'm trying to change, shake it up Chicago.

Maybe my new intonation will bring more viewers.

Bring more revenue.

Yeah, like this is a business.

For sure.

Okay, I'm always here for change.

You know that I'm here for change.

Let me tell you what I'm not here for.

My eye is still twitching.

I know everyone's so done with hearing about my eye twitch, you guys.

It's been, what is it now, like three, four weeks?

It's bugging the shit out of me.

So here's the thing about the show.

We welcome all complaints.

We do.

We think it's a necessary part of the human experience.

Of the Jewish faith.

Of the Jewish faith.

And we want you to complain.

However, like

there's got to be like a cap.

I agree.

There's got to be a cap on this eye Twitch and I'm being tested and I don't know why.

And I think I might have to get an eye patch and then of course make it like my entire personality.

Of course.

I guess Theo needs an eye patch too.

You guys could be twinning.

We'd just be a family of pirates.

Arg, Mete.

Are you ready, kids?

Aye aye, turdy.

I can't hear you.

Aye aye, turdy.

Oh.

Let's talk about the cultural impact of that theme song.

I would love to, but there's something really important that we have to talk about this morning.

Oh my God, wait, what?

Let me think.

I don't know if you're going to guess what I'm thinking of.

There's always so many things to talk about.

So true.

Thank God we have a daily podcast.

Especially on a Monday.

Like there was a long, there was a lot of weekend that happened.

Okay.

But the thing that I want to talk talk about primarily on today's show is your experience with a pet psychic.

Oh my God.

Wow.

I totally forgot.

I wasn't even going to bring it up.

I literally.

I'm obsessed.

I literally had such a busy weekend.

I totally forgot.

Yes, I finally met with a pet psychic yesterday.

And please share with everyone what she said.

There was a lot that she had said.

You know, I'm not a, I'm not a...

like a firm believer, you know, I'm not a skeptic.

Like I do feel like there are people people out there who have some sort of third eye.

I think there's definitely

to the to the whole thing.

Of course, I'm also a person who's, you know, deeply rooted in reality.

So I try not to take, you know,

everything so,

everything that she said so seriously.

Literally.

But you did engage a pet psychic over Zoom.

Yes.

Which is a choice.

Yes.

And let me tell you that pet psychic had a lot to say about Bruno.

And to be honest,

facts on facts on facts.

And now I think I have to believe everything she said.

She came for my boy.

I know what you're thinking.

Did she say Bruno?

She means Theo.

No.

She came for Bruno saying that Theo doesn't like Bruno, that Bruno eats his food and sits on his couch.

Yep.

Where else is he supposed to sit?

He, I guess when Theo came through, like, I know there's a lot going on in Theo's life.

And I just thought it was interesting.

It was worth noting that, you know, for the first time ever, Theo's had the ability to speak to me directly, to communicate.

And did he want to talk about his cancer?

No.

Did he want to talk about his pesky little cousin?

Yes.

Yes.

And also, there was something else that she said that we've been trying to interpret because it could mean a number of different things.

So she was really fixated on,

she said, Theo is saying he misses his palm tree.

Now she was like, do you have a palm tree in your house, maybe by the front door?

And I said, I've never had a plant in my home in my entire life.

So that's not it.

Then I got to thinking about palm trees.

Now, of course, I realize I'm sitting in front of a wallpaper full of palm trees.

The toast didn't even cross my mind at that point, at that moment.

What I had thought of was there's a, Jackie has a great backyard.

And whenever me and Jack, me and Theo stay there, Theo gets to roam free because you have a totally fenced in backyard.

It's probably the most freedom off-leash he ever really gets.

I leave him out there for literally hours.

He sniffs.

He one time had an altercation with an iguana.

Him and Bruno took on this big-ass iguana.

It's kind of, I would say, an important geographic feature in Theo's life.

Would you agree?

I would agree.

The iguana had brought our boys together.

It was a, it brought me together.

Oh my God, I was freaking, no one was up yet.

And so I took Theo out and Bruno was mulling around in the house.

So I was like, let me take both the boys out.

I let them go.

They're running.

And then they're both like doing something in the corner of your backyard.

I'm like, let me see what's going on.

There is an iguana who's bigger than them, like bigger than either one of them, who had obviously like climbed your fence and was clearly stuck in your yard.

He couldn't figure a way to get out.

Your yard is totally fenced in for the boys.

And

they went after him.

These two boys went after the iguana.

And I didn't know how to intervene because I thought it was dangerous.

But what am I going to do?

Touch the iguana?

Like I was totally helpless in that moment and no one was awake.

And it was so scary not to make their moment about me.

But like I was really kind of triggered.

Right, but these boys are hunters.

They are hunters and they are gatherers.

And they show that iguana who's boss.

So all's that to say that your backyard is very special the boys.

Yes, and it's a positive in Theo's life.

So, you thought the palm tree might have meant, and you texted me saying Theo wants to go to Jackie's house.

Like, because there is this part of your yard where there's like eight big palm trees that create this sort of like, I don't know, very picturesque, very vacationy, very behemy oasis.

Oasis, yes.

And it's one of my favorite parts of your backyard.

It's very beautiful.

And they're always, you know, running in and out of the trees.

So, I thought maybe that was him saying he wanted to go to your house.

But then someone else was like, you know, palm trees are also a a cornerstone of the toast.

So maybe he wants to get back to normal life, get back to work.

I don't know.

It's confusing.

I like, obviously, the first theory.

That's where my mind went.

Come on down anytime, due.

La la.

We would love to have you.

Yeah.

Open invitation.

So like I said, we're doing a bit of the east, a bit of the west, a bit of the unknown.

Today, Theo's at round two of radiation.

You did a bit of the North Pole because you took him to see the Christmas lights.

I did.

My weekend was very Theocentric.

You know, we got a stroller for him, so we were able to take him out of the house.

He's been, you know, kind of holed up.

And Theo's, of course, he's a King Charles Cavalier.

They're known for being like indoor dogs, lap dogs.

Lap dogs.

If he never left the house, like it wouldn't be a big deal.

But Theo has an adventurous side.

I remember when we did his DNA results, it said he was about 2% Neanderthal.

And what was his wolfiness?

Oh, I'm sorry, not Neanderthal.

Wolfiness.

He had a 4% wolfiness.

And that's via

Embark.

Embark.

That was one of our toast sponsors.

They're not a sponsor anymore, but it really was a fabulous.

We did it.

It was like 23andMe for dogs.

And they tell you their background.

And I thought it was really interesting.

It is very interesting.

So you've done a bit of the East, the West, the North, and now you got to come south, Turbie.

That's so true.

So my weekend was very like Theo heavy, trying to, you know, make him comfortable.

And I'm hoping that today we'll be able to.

I don't know if we'll know yet if radiation or anything that we've been doing has been helping.

I don't know if they're going to do x-rays.

I do wish I was there, but like I said, these are expensive treatments.

Mommy's got to work.

Mommy's got to work.

Yes.

So prayers up for due.

Prayer is up for due.

And also the psychic told you that he's not in pain.

Yeah.

And so did the acupuncturist.

Like, he was okay.

Yes, yes, yes.

She did say like she could see him making it to the spring.

And that's really not what I was hoping for.

You know, I was hoping, you know, for spring of 2100.

Right.

So

that's why I'm really not like wanting to believe everything she said.

No, obviously this whole exercise was a crock.

You also said that Ben was very much leading her.

Yeah, that's the thing.

Ben was.

That's like rule number one.

If you're going to get engage a psychic, like give them nothing.

Poker face.

How can you ever know?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It was good.

It was good.

It was good.

No, it sounded like a crock, especially the part about my boy Bruce.

No, that was probably the most legitimate part.

He was so hurt by these allegations.

Have you ever seen a psychic?

I think I've stopped in,

you know, on the side of the road once, but not like just, I don't know, maybe out of boredom.

Not in a meaningful way.

Not in a meaningful way.

It's not a recommended person.

Just like, oh, let's get some tea on me.

Yeah, I do have a lot of interest in seeing a medium.

I think that would be interesting.

And it's just too bad that when we interviewed Tyler Henry, he said he wasn't, you know, taking calls from the beyond.

Damn, he hung up the phone.

Do you remember that?

Yeah,

I forget why he said he wouldn't do it.

He was like off, you know, off the clock.

But Teresa Caputo's never off the clock.

And he hadn't had enough time to Google us.

You know, she's at the grocery store.

Oh my God, would you look at that hunk up or shoot?

Who's the young man who passed suddenly?

You know?

She's never off the clock.

No, if like I were at a dinner party and they're recycling, like I'm always going to get into it to hear them out.

I'm always going to hear them out.

Like, what's like, really, what's the downside if you don't put too much of a personal stake in it and don't make like actual serious decisions based off what they say.

Exactly.

But I'm always open, but you can't lead them on.

You can't.

Don't give them anything.

It's true.

Ben was definitely leading.

But, you know, I'm in this place in my life and it's kind of the place is called Desperation Nation where I am willing and open to try anything.

So keep sending recommendations.

Okay.

And I get a lot of inbounds, like make sure turdy sees this.

And I see it.

Taylor Strecker has been, she's like, people have been messaging me.

They need to get this information to you.

I'm just sending it your way.

I read everything.

So thank you.

Great.

So glad to hear it.

How was your weekend?

My weekend was great.

Super busy.

Lots of fun.

Very tiresome, but good.

Good.

How am I?

Boys are great.

They miss their dear auntie Koja.

I can't fucking wait.

Let me just say that.

I can't fucking wait to see those kids.

Those kids ain't going to know what the fuck hit those fucking kids.

They're not even going to know when entering Koja.

When Hurricane Koja comes swirling through the living room.

They are not going to know what's going on.

It could be sooner if Theo has his way.

And yes, I am going to hit your kids with that Koja spirit.

Ugh, nothing better.

No, and Olivia, tell Olivia when next time you see her, tell her kids to get fucking ready, okay?

I will.

I'm scared.

Well, actually, Hanukkah is this week, which is really exciting.

I've been planning.

I'm going to make latkes for the first time.

I've never made latkes.

I have.

Really?

By yourself?

No, no, with the great Mark Schoenwetter?

Oh, right.

Of course.

I'm sure you like made Mark do all the work and you took all the credit.

Mark did do all the work when he and I made

latkes together.

For anyone who doesn't know, Mark is my dear friend who is the cutest man alive and is a Holocaust survivor.

And last Hanukkah went to his house, he has a kind of like a really special recipe.

And ever since then, it's kind of like ruined latkes for me in general.

It's like you're in Mark's thing.

Yeah, no.

And it's like no latka is ever going to be as good as the one I made with Mark.

Right.

What's the recipe?

Where can I find it?

It's a shtetl recipe.

It's a recipe from, you know, from back in the day.

It goes, it dates back to

yeah, it's old school.

He had a special like potato shredding machine that literally looked like it was from Back to the Future.

It was insane.

Oh, wow.

Well, in my printer, I just printed a recipe.

I had heard the New York Times latka recipe is very good.

Hopefully it's better than anything else that they do.

I don't know how the New York Times could have a good latka recipe when the New York Times oozes anti-Semitism.

Do the latkas come in swastika-shaped designs?

No, I don't think so.

But it would make sense for them to like want to profit

from the Jews, but not support.

By the way, I bet it's so good.

Like that's their, like, that's how far they're willing to go, you know, to profit off of Judaism.

But if anybody has a good latka recipe, like, I'm not tied to anyone.

So, you know what?

I will ask Mark's daughters if they have his written down.

They were so thin, like, literally a cracker.

It was so good.

Ooh, okay, cool.

Yeah, like premium.

So I'm excited about that.

I made some banana bread yesterday, too.

Yum.

Tasty stuff.

And I read Britney Spears' memoir because we're recording the Redheads today.

A new episode drops on Thursday.

Great book for the end of the year.

Such a quick read.

I feel like I have a brief on Britney.

And now when I see all these stories about her in the tabloids, which are every single day, and I usually kind of skip past because I'm just like giving Britney like her space.

Like whatever she wants to do, go and do it.

You've earned the right.

We don't need to like pick it apart.

And I feel that way also after reading the book, but just with more context now on why she is the way she is.

And

it was just interesting.

So I'm excited to recap the book with the girlies.

And also, it's our end of year episode.

So we're doing top three books of the year, Redhead and Non-Redhead.

We are

on the same cycle because I too finished my celebrity memoir and my book club also meets this evening.

So tell me, because I don't want to spoil anything for anyone, but tell me like the juiciest thing you learned from Britney Spears' book.

And I'll share like the juiciest thing I learned from Matthew Perry's.

Okay, well, it's hard because a lot of like the big things became news stories like the abortion.

Oh, true.

I'm trying to think

of other like things that I didn't necessarily know.

Juiciest.

I don't know.

There was like some Jamie Lynn slander, which of course.

Jamie Lynn the sister, not Jamie the dad.

Oh, I mean, there was so much all family slander, which was weird because then also this weekend, she was seen with her mom.

Yes.

But after having read the book, like she's written off her family.

But also having read the book, it's like, I also understand why she always goes back to them because like, that's just who she is.

Even as they were like completely betraying her, like she cared so much about like what they thought of her.

Cade is in the book a lot.

I'm sure.

And he just was a really good friend to her.

Yeah.

So that was really nice to read.

And it was interesting how she felt about some of her songs and like what albums she considers like her best work.

And also, I guess it's also about like how many albums sold, but like she kept on talking about glory.

That's her best album.

And I need to like go back.

No, you probably have.

I need to like go back and like look at all her songs, but it was the book felt like very brief and in chronicling her career.

Like she just like one day is famous and huge and 200 million albums sold.

And it's like, oh, okay.

Yeah, how was that?

I guess she wasn't bothering people with that journey.

No, she really wasn't.

It moved very quickly, which was nice.

Yeah.

I would say the juiciest part of Matthew Perry's novel, and maybe people know this, but because of my age, like I wasn't aware of the

context at the time.

But of like the things about friends, like first, that they ended up being the highest paid people on television.

And the reason that they got that was because David Schwimmer, when the show started, was probably, he had like the most clout.

He was like probably the most famous one, maybe him and Courtney Cox.

And he was probably slated to

get paid the most.

And he went to all the individual other cast members and was like, we should negotiate as a team.

And had it not been for him doing that, like he could have been greedy and made more than everyone else.

And it would have been like fair.

But he decided that like moving forward for the rest of the show, that they would all be like one solid unit in negotiating with.

the network, which I thought was interesting.

I also didn't know that Jennifer Anniston was the one who wanted the show to end.

And that's, and they all like kind of agreed, but she was the one who said it and decided, like, decided it was over.

And I always gathered this as like a viewer of the show, but like Joey's character made no sense in a lot of different ways.

He was like this really good-looking guy who was friends with all these women.

Like it just, he was also dumb.

Like his character was kind of

messy.

It never,

I couldn't even define like what his role was within the group.

And like that was a general feeling.

Like everybody understood that.

And they said by seasons nine and ten, like those were Joey's best seasons.

And that's why Joey got the spin off Joey that lasted very, very briefly.

But

I always felt that was something like I just felt, not like that everyone else did.

But apparently like they knew they couldn't figure out Joey as a character.

How do we solve a problem like a Joey?

Exactly.

So if you're a Friends fan, I loved the book.

I think I gave it four out of five stars.

Joey reminds me of Johnny Drama from Entourage

from my perch of barely watching both shows.

Well, just because they're both like desperate out-of-work actors.

Clowns.

Yeah, yeah.

Johnny Drama is one of the greatest characters in television history.

Like, they don't make him like Johnny Drama anymore.

Yeah.

Well, at least he got his justice.

So true.

Yeah.

So two good memoirs.

What score did you give Brittany?

I gave it a four.

Same.

Because I don't know that it got deep enough.

I don't know that it was meant to.

But I felt like she was talking about things, maybe expecting us to know, like, from the outsider's perspective.

Like,

I don't ever know what happened, like why she got put in the conservatorship.

Like she talks about how she was kind of like going, you know, not, not even wild.

She was just like having fun, living life, kind of living on the edge, but still only ever like drinking, not even in an abusive way, just having fun sort of way.

And all of a sudden, like,

you know, the hair shaving and the umbrella.

And when she described those things, I was able to understand how she got to that point of the hair shaving and the umbrella, especially like all the rage against the paparazzi.

But

to have things get so bad with her family, i i just like it didn't like there were chunks missing

yeah or

yeah i don't know but maybe if i had been a little older at the time i would have be like oh i could put it together yeah you know what i mean so yeah not that anyone ever deserves to have that happen to them but it's like that that didn't happen the first 10 years of her career like what really changed but she was also going through a lot but still it was just like a drastic measure to take yeah yeah yeah so i really couldn't even tell you why they, why they did that.

In a real, like other than the fact that like Jamie Spears is a very controlling man, his father was a very controlling, abusive man.

That's obviously like the thread that they drew that he got, he was like abused by his dad.

And like, he was doing those same things to Brittany, like very, very controlling of her.

Um,

beside that, I don't know what Brittany, she said she like drove like to the edge of a cliff, like in a fun way and like was like, you know, just adrenaline rushing.

Yeah.

A conservator shit yeah you know like how did we get there how did we get out how did we get out i mean she thinked the fans so much she was in like a institution uh mental facility when and no one knew she was there and she couldn't communicate with anyone and one of the nurses there like showed her online like people like doing like free britney stuff for the first time and how it meant so much to her that like somehow her fans knew that she wasn't okay

and that's like what got the ball rolling uh and also her kind of you know, invest, like taking a chance on herself and finding a new lawyer and deciding like, I'm going to get out of this.

Cause also they hadn't put her in an institution until then where she couldn't get out.

And she's like giving blood once a week and going like in bed from like nine to nine and can't do anything, doesn't have a phone.

Yeah.

So that was like rock bottom of the conservatorship.

But also like then her fans like sense.

And I do remember it being that way where like, there were a lot of hardcore fans that were like, what's going on with Britney?

Where is Brittany?

Free Britney.

Yeah.

And she's like, that's exactly what it was no it's it's one of those very few rare instances where like the internet's instinct was like right on the pulse of what was really going on yeah

and like it happens all the time that people are always wrong you know they're like i think this but it really was true and it galvanized the entire fandom yeah and they really created real change Also, I have questions about Kevin Federline.

Okay.

Because

he, in the book, like, not not a good husband, you know, used the kids against her.

He got so much more custody than she did.

At this present moment in time, does she see her sons?

Why do I feel like there was drama where her sons were like talking about her?

Yeah, no, she doesn't see her sons.

They, one of them just turned 18.

So he's not like a minor anymore, but the other lives with Kevin and they have decided they don't want to see.

Brittany.

It's just so like when she was a mom, I didn't realize she had two kids in two years.

She had her first son and got pregnant three months later.

Like that's really close together.

And so she's like, has a newborn and is pregnant, carrying her babies.

Like there's all that footage of her, like when she like trips.

Like she's literally pregnant holding a child with like a thousand shutter flashes around her.

Like that's not.

Anyways, she loves her son so much.

Like everything she did was like to try and get time with them.

But like, how did this loser

get her kids over her?

Like when at one point she's the most powerful like pop artist in the world.

I don't know how you can like

see that much power, even though it was taken from her.

I know, you know, I don't know enough about like the whole Britney Kevin situation.

And I know that the Britney fans like hate Kevin.

They think he's like a couch potato who cashes Britney's checks for child support.

And I'm sure that he does, but there is, you know,

it is worth noting that like

while Britney was struggling, like they had a dad who

took care of them, you know?

Yeah.

And I think there's merit in that.

And like, yeah, he doesn't work and he cashes Britney's checks, but those kids are alive and well.

And there's, there's value in that.

So I think he gets like a lot of hate.

And I'm sure some of it is warranted.

But I do think not enough people talk about the fact that like for many years, Brittany was unable due to her health to be a fully present mom.

And like their dad was there for them.

And I don't know.

I think like not enough people talk about that, but I also don't know enough about it.

Yeah, I just don't know enough about it.

It's like, why did he want, she was always worried when she met him, she found out later that he had one small child and the child on the way.

And so she was worried that he was going to leave her when her kids were little, which is exactly what he did.

But then why did he want them so badly like that didn't seem a cord is it just so that he would get the child support and like that was his incoming job it's possible she didn't say that but see these are the things i'm like trying to piece together that i don't fully understand and then he did raise them prime like with more custody than she did no and as as they got older they chose to live with him.

So there's something to be said for, you know, for that.

Yeah, but also there was an incident with Jamie Spears, the dad.

he like got abusive towards one of them so then they got a restraining order against him and so if the dad was conservative over britney and always around britney then britney couldn't be around oh yeah

yeah yeah yeah there's so kind of left with a lot of questions still yeah but a general outline of the last 40 years got it interesting yeah

um so we're gonna dive in if that's okay with you

Always okay with me.

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Our first story,

it's always the first story on a Monday, usually.

It's true.

It's Taylor and Travis.

Taylor went to Wisconsin to see her mann take on the Green Bay Packers.

And lose.

And lose.

This was the first game she was in attendance attendance where they lost.

So

she'll obviously have to be there for him, a shoulder to cry on.

I think he's going to cry some big fat tears.

Because honestly, like,

they lost, but like, Travis also like played poorly.

Did you watch the game?

I did.

And literally, there was two minutes left.

And I turned to Ben.

I'm like, where is Travis?

Like, I literally didn't even see him.

And it was a very interesting day of football because the Eagles and the Chiefs both lost.

So I saw that the Eagles played the 49ers, which is a really really big game.

And I think that'll probably be their conference championship because they're like the best in their leagues.

And it was last year.

And the 49ers won.

I love that.

I'm so happy for them.

Not only did they win, they slayed the house down.

But I don't know why I feel like that means the Eagles are going to win next time because they're like extra hungry for it.

So I said the same thing to Ben,

but...

They were they had the home game the Eagles like they had the home field advantage I think maybe next time it'll be in San Francisco like is that how it works I feel like the Eagles, like, they thrive in more of an underdog situation.

Like, when they're on top, they, they don't know what to do.

Like, it's like, you know, the, he, oh, he said in his Super Bowl speech, like, hungry dogs eat first or something like that.

Like, that's their, they're scrappy.

They're scrappy.

They don't want to be like, you know, a big fat high on the hog.

No, I, I agree.

Big fat, high, and the hog is like, so Chiefs.

Yeah, like always winning.

We stay winning.

Like Patriots, they're not that.

And I just think it's worth noting like the eagles have lost two games this season to both of my teams the 49ers and the jets that's insane that they lost to the jets no it's just kind of like one of my favorite fun facts about this current nfl season that i bring up probably once a week are you sure that's true positive that's insane they're like 11 and two or 10 and two whatever even if the jets do nothing else of note this year like That's insane.

But the Jets won't do nothing else of note this year because did they lose yesterday?

Yes.

Did they score a a touchdown even?

No.

But is December 24th three weeks away?

Yes.

And rumors are swirling that Mr.

State of Grace will be making a grand return.

Yes.

Can't wait.

I can't.

Okay.

I can't wait for that.

So Eagles 49ers, I actually feel like the Eagles have a better chance of winning the next time they play because they lost.

Yeah.

No, I know.

They have something to prove.

And they love having something to prove.

That's just like.

I know.

I thought the same.

I literally said the same thing to Ben.

I'm like, I kind of wanted, you know, the Eagles to win just so that next time, like, you check in the boys or just madder.

They're lit up.

They're madder.

Yeah.

Rub some dirt in it.

So the only loss that's really kind of like a big L is the Chiefs.

What are you doing?

No, and the Packers are like not a bad team by any means, but they're not like, there's like an elite upper echelon of teams right now.

It includes like the Eagles, the 49ers, the Chiefs, and like, I think maybe there's one other team that's doing really well.

Oh, the Detroit.

I just feel like I wouldn't have included like Green Bay in there.

Like, Green Bay at this point wasn't.

Yeah, and Green Bay at this point wasn't even slated to make the playoffs.

So, like, what are you doing?

Yeah, and Taylor's there.

She came all this way.

She brought her plane and her friends and her coat.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Not cool.

Not cool.

But let's talk about Taylore and Brittany.

And

I feel like this was the first game she went to where there wasn't like a lot of news.

There wasn't a lot of photos or videos.

Yeah.

I wonder maybe like the culture in Green Bay, they just like didn't didn't really care as much because it wasn't a home game.

No way, like, why they were like putting up signs, like, we're here for Simone Biles because her man plays for the Green Bay Packers, yeah, no, and I love that, and I'm here for Simone Biles too, but like, they didn't put her on TV a lot, like, there just wasn't a lot of content that came out of it, yeah.

But people are speculating that she borrowed Britney Mahomes' coat, she definitely did, but the girl next to her was also wearing the same coat.

Oh, maybe, like, one of the chiefs' wags has like a coat, line of a line of coats.

Yeah, I thought the girl next to her, she was blonde.

She was wearing the exact same coat.

I thought she might have been a body double.

I don't like the coat.

So the fact that maybe three different people purchased it as opposed to, you know, everyone sharing is shocking.

I don't like, I'm not into like big coats like with

that fuzzy material.

That's not fur.

Madam.

Literally.

No, it's what I'm wearing today too.

Yeah, teddy vibes.

I'm actually not.

I think it makes like I'm wearing something like it.

And I think it makes me look like, I think it's unflattering.

No, but also teddy vibes in red.

You know, it was like, it reminds me of Clifford.

It's giving Clifford, I have the same thought.

I guess, like, it's red for the Chiefs, so we must accept it.

She looks awesome.

And I love the bun.

I love the bun.

The bun.

I loved the boots.

Like, it was a cute look for sure.

I do wonder if it's Britney's coat.

They, like, they seem really tight.

And Taylor's been in Kansas City.

Britney blew with her.

Did she?

On Air Swift.

I mean, Air Swift, greater than every other airline on the planet.

I would give my right arm.

And then they jetted out immediately after the game.

I mean, why would they stick around?

But they made it seem like she skipped, dipped out because they lost, which she obviously did.

No.

But was she going to spend the night in Wisconsin?

She's going home.

To Kansas City.

Right.

To Travis's house.

I'm assuming.

Yeah, well, if Brittany was with her, they flew.

I don't think they went together.

Oh, maybe she just needed a ride there.

I'm sure they did everything together, honestly.

It's like, why did they part ways when they were backstage?

I'm so glad you brought that up because they spent the game together in the same box.

But the video we had gotten of Taylor entering the arena from like the backstage, you know, underground entrance, she walks in with Brittany and then they literally give each other a kiss on the cheek and part ways.

Yeah, it's like Taylor had to go through a separate entrance.

I know why.

Because at the beginning of games, because I went once with like a, with a wag, there is...

Like the families go on the field before kickoff and like say hi to their husbands and stuff You like stand behind this rope and your husband like you always stand in the same place and your husband comes and finds you.

Um, and it's like so cute.

That's where all the girlies like take the cute picture as Olivia Colpo's always doing it.

And then you go up to your seats, and Taylor's not doing that yet.

Yet, I don't, I don't think Taylor would ever do it.

Honestly, I think for her to be on a stadium on a field with so many other people is like actually

a security issue.

Like, one of the fans could literally just jump down and like, I don't think she would ever do it, even if they're married with kids.

But what if the kids want to go?

Yeah,

I guess we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

No, I think in the course of their relationship, it will happen at least once.

I mean, I can't say any, like every time I make a prediction, I'm wrong.

Like, this has been so unpredictable.

Okay, well, I feel like every time I make a prediction, I'm wrong too.

So it's like, if we make opposite predictions, one of us has to be right.

Okay.

It increases our odds.

We should do that for everything.

Then the toast is always right.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

It's seven years in.

How are we just thinking of this?

Because we're really not like the type of people who like make pop culture predictions.

I don't care if my predictions come at you or not.

Like I'm just having fun, you know?

And also like, I'm so authentic that I really like, if I have a gut feeling on a prediction, like I'm sharing what I actually think, not, you know, trying to increase my odds in Vegas.

No, and I'm so authentic that like

this show is reflective of my personality and my brand.

And my brand like is being dumb and wrong all the time.

Like, sorry.

Yeah.

I'm just that authentic.

You love to see it.

Authenticity at its highest.

So that's your football recap for the weekend.

Taylor and Travis going strong.

Now she'll be there for him in this low of his time of night.

It's not been the greatest few weeks for them and her, but I think they're there for each other and that's what matters.

Yeah, I think so too.

I think the fact that she came to the game, you know, public, you know, publicly facing, showed up for her man, I think it's good.

Yeah.

Agreed.

Are you ready for our next story?

Yeah.

Jerry Turner, the Golden Bachelor, is

no, is

standing up for himself, dismissing the weight shaming claims.

He said he really doesn't have time to think about it.

Oh, also, I wanted to say it was spoiled for me too.

I saw,

I'm so sorry.

I saw the name and then like I saw the two of them sitting down for an interview.

So like now I'll recognize her too.

Me too.

Yeah, but Golden Bachelor star Jerry Turner seemingly blew off claims that he allegedly broke up with his ex-girlfriend due to her weight gain.

He told the LA Times, I don't have time to reflect on comments like this.

My only response is that I have so many positive things in my life right now.

I have the wonderful love of blank.

Blank.

Spoiled again.

My partner.

He shared, adding that he is happy to look forward.

Also, in the interview, he did kind of talk about the claim that he hadn't dated since his wife and was like, you know, I guess that is untrue, but we different,

it's very like subjective what dating and being in a relationship means.

Yeah.

Um, one thing about me, like, I'm not canceling Gary.

Like, I'm not going to be able to get it.

No, I'm not canceling Gary.

And I also kind of love like when you're 72 years old and like you know thyself, like you can, you don't have a hard time standing up for yourself.

No, and this is what's refreshing about like the Golden Bachelor is the crop of people and the talent isn't your typical, you know, 22-year-old influencer on the rise.

Like, where you, oh, I'm sorry.

Like, Gary doesn't give a fuck.

Yeah.

No, we're not getting a video from Gary.

We're not getting a notes app screenshot.

Like, Gary does, Gary don't give a fuck.

Gary is not listening.

He's not learning.

Gary is not over party.

Gary is not over party.

So that's a party I'll go to.

Me too.

I think I'll wear this hat to the party tonight.

You should.

Gary would love it.

Gary would love it.

Gary would love everything.

Because Gary's a nice guy.

And that's all you get when you do the Golden Bachelor.

I can't believe like we literally, and this is actually one of our predictions that did come true.

We said that people were going to like dig up Gary's old tweets.

I honestly didn't think they would travel to Indiana and find like the cocktail waitress who saw him on a date one time, thus disproving he never dated after his wife died.

I didn't think they would go that deep, but the depravities of the current state of journalism never ceased to amaze me.

No, and the depravities and links they had to go to get something on Jerry just for me underscores that he must be an amazing man.

That, like, this was it.

This was the worst of Gary.

Right.

He was actually installing hot tubs when he said he was retired.

Like, oh, I'm so sorry.

He wants to work.

Yeah.

He's boy with a job.

Get your fucking ass up and work.

And that's what Kim was talking about.

Like, exactly.

She was talking about Gary.

Speaking of Kim, did you see this forlorn Balenciaga show?

Hashtag collab with Erhwan.

Like, the bar is low.

The outfits were low.

Terrible.

I guess everyone has just officially moved on from Balenciaga.

Like, the, like,

the elites.

Elites.

But the people have not.

If anyone who wears Balenciaga promotes Balenciaga, you look at the comments.

The people are still here.

Yes.

Also, when I went shopping a few weeks ago and it was holiday, so like everything is, you know, buzzy.

And there was one bag.

I was in like the designer section.

There was one sales shelf and it was all Balenciaga bags.

The people are not happy with Balenciaga still.

Every time I walk or drive past the Balenciaga store in the city, I always, I'm just like curious.

I have not seen a human being in there since this whole thing happened.

Like seriously.

And at the beginning, they had police standing outside for a while.

Yeah.

No, I don't think anyone's going to do anything crazy in the store aside from like not want to buy their things.

And

it also doesn't help that their things, like every time I see Kim wearing it, it's so ugly.

Oh, yeah.

Her outfit was really ugly.

I will say, like that little bag with the B on it.

Yeah.

It's cute.

It comes in every color.

So whatever your favorite color is, like you could get one.

Maybe if things had gone differently for Marina Saga, at some point I might have gotten it in pink.

It's a good evening bag.

It's, yeah, it's just a, it's a cute bag.

So, so that's a loss, but those outfits are not.

No, it's like enough with the sweatshirts and the spandex.

Like it's so ugly.

Yeah.

And it's like, you can get that anywhere.

It doesn't have to be.

And I don't know, just doing it as like a collab with Erewhon.

When I think of Erewhon now is like, it's so TikTok-y.

It's like, it's so influencery.

And I think not, I mean, I love influencers, but I think they're beneath Balenciaga.

Like, actually,

actually now, no, but yeah.

You know what I mean?

But like the fact that Kim was like, she's like a meme with her Erewhon.

bag.

Yeah, it was so like basic and uninspiring.

Sick was the word I was going to use.

Yeah, I was shocked at that too.

There was also another fabulous event in LA last night, one of those academy things.

Yes, and I will move it to our next story because that fake event where everyone just looks gorgeous and takes pictures, but we don't know what we're celebrating happened last night.

It's called the Academy Museum Gala.

But that's new.

I haven't heard of that one.

A couple times a year, there are these things and their names are familiar to me.

LACMA.

LACMA is only becoming familiar because they keep pushing it.

I never heard of this one.

And I've never, this carpet didn't look familiar to me ever.

Claudia, this happens every year.

Remember we saw those pictures of like Kaya Gerber and that was LACMA.

That was

positive.

And Austin Butler?

Yes.

Okay.

This one is the Academy Museum Gala at the Academy Museum of Motion Pictures in Los Angeles.

So it's like an Oscars, like it sounds like a pre-Oscars type of event.

No, it's like, I don't even know if there's an event.

I think it's just like pictures on a carpet and then everyone goes home.

Like I seriously think this is a front.

I it's a money laundering scheme.

I've never heard of this event.

But you see the pictures are like, so Kendall was there, Haley Bieber.

They look gorgeous.

Like I I feel like they both looked stunning.

I feel like it's just an event for people to get their pictures.

Yeah.

And then I don't know what happens on the inside if there even was an inside.

Right.

Like, where does the carpet lead to?

There's nothing behind them.

No, I know.

It's this is it's giving industry plant.

It's a front.

Yeah.

Let me search for more information.

Academy museum.

Usually we'll see like a couple photos from the inside.

And

your party.

Right, right.

On instagram and remember that time that lady gaga went we were like what is this she went to lacma i don't know is it lacma no there are a few events every year that like genuinely confuse me but the roster is so a-list that you're forced to pay attention and that's what happened with lacma so now when lacma happens once a year i'm like oh yeah it's the lacma thing Yeah, but then there was that other event in New York the other week.

What was that?

Yes, there was.

There was.

I don't know what it was, but it was a fashion thing.

But it wasn't CFDA.

I thought it was like a TV thing.

I don't know.

I don't know either.

I'm looking at more pictures from the event, and it's just, it goes, this carpet leads to nowhere.

There's no other people on the carpet.

There's no one behind you.

They're not going anywhere.

It's giving Black Mirror.

Yeah.

Well, everyone who goes looks great.

Of course they do.

That's the point.

And then they go home.

But what is, it's probably like a great night out for a celeb.

Like, you don't actually have to go to the event.

You just get your photo taken and then you get to like go to In-N-Out and go home.

Yeah, or like go to catch in a nice dress.

Sushi Park.

Sushi Park.

That sounds good.

What are you having for lunch?

Oh, my God.

I was actually thinking about that on the way over here because I woke up particularly hungry.

I had probably the biggest meal of my life last night.

What'd you have?

I went to Reserve Cut, which is like probably the best kosher restaurant in the city.

It's all the way down in the financial district.

So like I never go.

I've probably been three times in my life.

And every time I'm there, I'm like, I should go more.

But I pretty much ate everything that was put in front of me.

I had for

appetizer, short rib brisket

in a taco.

I had krispy rice, spicy tuna.

Then I had a big-ass filet mignon with some french fries.

And then I had a chocolate cake.

Wow, I'm so jealous.

I had a hot dog.

Oh, that's disgusting.

Why?

Like, I don't know.

That's rude.

By the way.

By the way, that's rude.

You.

I said I'm jealous because you had a four course meal and I had a hot dog.

You said it like it was bad, so I was just playing along with like your energy.

No,

my energy wasn't disgusting.

That's what I just feel.

I feel like someone's yum's turdy.

I feel as though hot dogs cooked at home, like, are never good.

Grilled on a barbecue?

I don't think that they're ever good.

Yeah, at a baseball game, honestly, on the street corner with the crowd and the, I could see it being good, you know, chili,

chili concarne dog.

Like, I could see that.

I don't know.

Like, cooking one up in your house.

On the grill outside.

It's weird to me.

That's weird to me.

That it's weird to you.

I guess we're just weird girls.

That you would yuck a yum.

And you know how much I love hot dogs, but I was just saying, like, my meal was, you know.

I literally was just like playing off of your energy, like searching for victimhood, much.

No, I'm not.

I'm just pointing out bad manners much.

Jackie, you're beneath this sort of conversation.

Honestly, you're beneath this sort of thing.

You're talking about your filet minion and your short rib tacos.

And I was just saying, like, I had a singular hot dog.

Disgusting is a bit of hyperbole.

You're beneath this conversation.

This conversation is hyperbolic.

Like, are you okay?

You stole my word.

You stole my phrase.

You stole my phrase first.

What was your phrase?

Beneath you.

Beneath me.

I can't with you.

You can't with me because you're wrong.

Let's get back to the task at hand.

What are you having for lunch?

Let's get down to business to defeat the Hun.

What am I having for lunch?

I don't know.

I really, I don't know.

Me neither.

Actually, I just had like an inspired idea.

What?

Let me just see if any of my friends were like usually available for lunch, like wanna

get lunch.

They wanna lunch with you?

I need to think because I feel like if I want to, some of my lunch might need planning, but I don't think I'm gonna order something.

Right.

I love lunch.

What's your favorite meal of the day, would you say?

Like dinner.

Dinner is my favorite too, but like, what's your reasoning behind it?

That I just have enough time to anticipate.

Like, whatever I want, I have enough time to anticipate it and get it or make it versus like, it's already lunchtime.

I have, I've made no plans.

I've made no arrangements.

Yeah, lunch kind of creeps up on you and then you're like waiting for dinner.

Yeah.

I like dinner because like in my current health journey, like I, dinner is where I kind of just like fuck shit up.

You know, I try to be good during the whole day and then dinner is like, let's go balls to the wall.

Yeah.

Great.

Yeah.

Are you ready for our next story?

It is great.

Are you ready for our next story?

It is great.

And no, I'm not ready for our next story.

You don't look ready.

Do you want to ask me why?

Why?

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Thanks, La.

You're welcome, Fa.

Our next story, one of our favorite girlies is a married woman.

Who?

Let me think.

Who got married?

I didn't know until I checked the stories this morning.

It was pretty low-key.

Who?

Vanessa Hudgens.

Oh, I got a people notification about it this morning.

Married professional baseball player Cole Tucker in Mexico.

So Vanessa and her fiancé said, I do on Saturday in Tulum.

Sources confirmed to people.

Over the weekend, a photo surfaced on X of her posing on the beach barefoot in a casual white dress, which fueled speculation that she celebrated her wedding.

Her former HSM co-star Mar Neek Coleman posted a video on on her Instagram story showing footage of a tropical setting into loom.

Oh, I'd love that.

Taylor was there.

Yes, her BFF, Gabrielle and Taylor back together.

So what is the status of her relationship with Ashley Tisdale?

Because Ashley Tisdale is really tight with Austin Butler.

Yeah.

Her best friend.

And I think things got weird.

Right.

So I'm assuming she wasn't there.

I don't know.

We don't know much about this wedding because it was all very low-key and it's all coming out slowly.

So maybe she was there and we'll find out soon.

Stay tuned.

I hate to be that person because I'm really happy that she's moved on, but like I'm, I, my feet stand firmly like in the era of Austin Butler and Vanessa Hutchins.

Like I just, I think it's wrong.

Like I think it's wrong.

What happened?

It is wrong what happened.

I stand firmly with Vanessa Hutchins and Zach Efron.

Like you can't watch high school musical and tell me that those two aren't meant to be together forever.

Like it hurts to watch.

It's like watching Twilight, like Edward and Belle.

Like the love that they have for each other.

And I actually think this is more because they were a little bit more like PDA about it.

They were obsessed with each other.

And I just don't see why it can't couldn't work today between them.

Like now, when I look at Kristen Seward and Robert Pattinson, I'm like, yeah, you two.

No.

Yeah.

Not well, one of them.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, no, no.

I mean, she's like gay, so obviously, like, it's not even in the realm of possibility.

Right.

So, no, no, no.

It's not going to happen.

I still, I do still feel sadness.

I do want to feel.

But, like, Vanessa Hudgens and Zach Effren, I feel like they could be a new couple that we reported on.

Like, they are still

for one another.

They're right for what.

I mean, of course, she's now, you know, happily married to someone else.

And it's not what you want to hear the day after your wedding.

But like, right.

Hopefully she's not listening because it's how I feel.

This is my truth.

So I'm so glad you brought up Zach Ephron because...

You know, Matthew Perry had said like when he dies and if there's ever like a biopic about him, he wants Zach Efron to play him in a movie.

I think they really connected on 17 again.

And I thought it was interesting that Matthew Perry Perry didn't bring up 17 again in his book because he talked a lot about the work that he did after

Friends and how like because of his addiction he became kind of just like nobody wanted to work with him so we started writing a lot and so we talked a lot about his post friends career and I would argue that 17 again was

at least commercially one of his biggest successes after friends yeah

but then at the end of his book he had a little montage of photos of moments that he had referenced in the book and he had a photo of him from 17 17 again.

And he wrote a little blurb about how the

reviews were not good for his performance in that movie.

And people said he looked tired.

And he was like, I was supposed to look tired.

Yeah, that was the point.

But also, now that I think about the movie, it's like his character was the main character, but him as an actor wasn't because he gets replaced by Zach Efron pretty early on

when he becomes 17 again.

Oh, yeah.

So is Matthew Perry like not in the middle of the movie?

Is he just in the beginning of the action?

Yeah.

oh yeah the whole point is that like he hates his life and he's like tired of it and that's why he

he becomes tired yeah but then he becomes 17 again early on and then he only comes back at the end so i that's a great movie it is a great movie but that's also probably why he's not the main if if the movie like was nominated for an oscar he wouldn't be best actor supporting even might not even be best supporting because that other guy is that funny guy and then also the wife is that leslie man yeah

she's great that's a great movie Michelle Trachtenberg.

Oh my God, Michelle Trachtenberg.

By the way, thus fueling my conspiracy theory about who the fuck blackballed Michelle Trachtenberg.

What happened to hashtag, where in the world is Michelle Trachtenberg?

We have to have her on the toast.

We need to be doing the important interviews.

We have to have her on the toast.

Like, that's what the world needs.

That Georgina Sparks,

ex-Ice Princess, ex-17 again.

On the toast.

Ex Harriet the Spy.

Harriet the Spy.

No, she's an immensely talented person.

I hope she's really happy.

Let's check her Instagram.

Does she have

Instagram?

I hope maybe she wasn't blacklisted.

Maybe she left this toxic industry to find peace.

Well, I'm all about that.

Maybe she's with Addison Rae.

Addison Rae was at the event last night, the LACMA Academy, Lakama.

Like perfection.

Perfection.

Perfection.

Perfection.

Okay, she does have Instagram.

Is she active?

She is active.

What's the last thing she posted?

A selfie that says naughty or nice list.

Oh, so somewhat recently?

21 hours ago.

Oh, obsessed.

I should follow her.

I don't know if you're going to...

There's a lot of art.

Some Harry Potter comedy.

Is she Harry Potter?

I think it's Harry Potter.

No, I think she's just a fan.

Relatable.

Okay, relatable queen.

What was the story?

Vanessa Hudgens is a married woman.

Oh, so yeah, like I'm happy.

I am.

But there is like a sadness.

Inevitable?

An inevitable sadness?

Terrible sadness, actually.

Also, like, I know she was engaged, and I know that, like, this is what happens when people are in relationships and engaged.

But to me, the fact that Vanessa Hudgens is a married woman, I just didn't see it for her.

No, and I'm just,

I don't know, it's not right.

Like, it's not right.

It just, it doesn't feel right to me.

I can't explain it.

No, I know.

It just doesn't.

But because it feels so wrong, it makes me feel like it is right for her because she, like,

is kind of going against the grain with this.

No, and I we we love a girl who marches to the beat of her own drum.

Like we love.

However, just for me, it doesn't feel right and i feel like vanessa hudgens is on every carpet at every event doing everything like is she gonna start she should have been at lacma no is she gonna start to bring her husband

it's like such a drag you know i'm not

i don't know it just it doesn't feel right and he's a baseball player yeah i love someone who has his own thing like major league

um i do believe there was a minor moment the pirates

yeah but i think he made it back to the majors he's currently on the albuquerque Isotopes.

Oh.

So I don't know.

It just doesn't feel right.

Which is my M-L-B.

My L-B.

Excuse me?

M-I-L-B.

I believe that means minor.

That would make a lot of sense.

Oh, yeah.

Or like major intramural league baseball or something.

It's M lowercase I.

It's minor.

So maybe he goes like up and down.

I don't know.

It just doesn't feel right, you know?

Oh, and by the way, the Pirates are major league.

So is he on the Pirates?

Pittsburgh Pirates, no.

But he played for them.

So I think he goes up and down.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which is, you know, the life of a lot of professional athletes.

Actually, I was watching the game last night.

It's like the saddest thing happened.

The Chiefs versus, oh man, I like actually, this is why I can't watch football because I'm such an MPA.

So the Chiefs game, it was like towards the end.

It was very high stakes.

The Green Bay team was punting the ball.

So, you know, one guy kicks it and everybody runs.

And one of the guys running fell.

No.

One of the guys running, like, they threw a flag down because he ran too fast.

Like, he crossed the line before the kicker did.

He was eager, Beaver.

And they were saying, like, this guy just got picked up off the practice squad.

So it's like your first big day and you're breaking like the dumbest rule.

Like, calm down.

like i felt so like i i had to turn the game off like i felt so sad and like empathetic like i just knew this was like such a big deal for him like he finally got off the practice squad i feel like getting on the practice squad is like it's such a bummer as a professional like it's a part of just a lot of the professional athlete's career and to get off is like

and like your first day back you're like literally breaking one of the like the most amateur rules yeah i felt really sad And it's like, because he was so eager beater, because he just got off the practice squad, like he couldn't wait one more second.

No, I know.

And so, his team did win.

So, hopefully, like they just sweep it under the rug and like chalk it up to big, you know, big day nerds.

Right, but then the next time something happens, like, they're gonna bring this up again.

This is a pattern.

This is a pattern.

Yeah, they definitely swept it under the rug yesterday, but they're not gonna forget, they're not gonna forget that quickly.

When I tell you, like, I actually had tears in my eyes, like, I can't even talk about it.

It was so sad.

That's really like my butt is clenching.

No,

I know.

It was really sad.

Would it have been better or worse if he fell?

Worse, like for sure.

But the funny thing is, is like they were playing it in slow motion and his leg like cross slide and he knew, you know, he knew he, like it was really, it was one of the most tragic things I've ever seen on television.

I'm so sorry.

It's okay.

They don't tell you that about football.

No, they don't tell you about like the immense sadness that comes with being a football fan who also is just like a deeply, you know, I'm an emotional person, you know?

Yeah.

And I feel like the men who watch, like, they don't wade into the emotions.

Breathe past that.

No, but like, I think about that all the time when it's like the game comes down to a kick and the kicker doesn't make it.

Yeah.

And it's so clear.

whose fault it is that the game was lost because usually like the whole team you know it's a team there are mistakes made throughout the game but like when it's just on one person it's too much for one person to bear i agree i feel more that way in like college football because then like the whole school is mad at you at least and then you have football like you can go home to your family and like your friends but like in college that's your whole life like where do you go that's why that's why it's really so important i think this is a lesson for everyone is to like not give everything to your job you know it's so important to have like a full life at home too because things will go wrong at work whether you work you know in an arena where millions of people are watching or you just work at you know a store Like, things are going to happen.

And that's why it's so important to have like a full life at home or things outside of work because work will not fulfill you.

No.

And when they turn on you, which they will, because we're

humans, we're not perfect.

You're going to do something imperfect in the workplace.

Like, you need a refuge.

You need a refuge.

And that's, I'm sure, what Taylor was for Travis last night.

100%.

Oh, yeah.

He had a bad day at work.

Yeah.

Are you ready for our fifth and final story?

Whoa.

Which wasn't meant to be our fifth, but I wound up moving, you know, the front academy rewards.

Um, Billie Eilish is firing back at questions about her sexuality.

She said, I like boys and girls, leave me alone about it.

So, Billie Eilish is kind of like taking on variety after giving an interview and then another interview, and then posting to her Instagram a picture of, well, it says carousel, but the first picture I think is like of her pants while she's on the toilet.

Because do you see it?

I'm

on my way.

Like,

I think she's trying to send a message about the belt, but I'm pretty sure it's her pants on the toilet.

Just that's like a like a crazy angle to take a photo of.

Like, that's the, that's like an angle that's really only meant for your eyes.

No, it's a very, like, I know, like,

people post

everything on the internet now.

Yeah, she's on the toilet for sure.

She's on the toilet, but she's trying, I think she's trying to make a statement about the belt because it's like two women crawling towards one another.

Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then the caption says, thanks, Variety, for my award and for also outing me on a red carpet at 11 a.m.

Instead of talking about anything else that matters.

I like boys and girls.

Leave me alone about it, please.

Literally, who cares?

Stream what was I made for?

So she did an interview with Variety where she talked about how she likes girls.

And then she was at an event for Variety.

And they asked her about that question.

That statement she had made in the interview.

The statement that she made in the interview.

And she said,

in the interview, she she said, I never really felt like I could relate to girls very well.

And I love women so much.

I love them as people.

I'm attracted to them as people.

I'm attracted to them for real.

And then on the carpet, they asked if she had intended to come out in the issue.

And she said, no, I didn't.

I kind of thought, wasn't it obvious?

I didn't realize people didn't know.

She said, she doesn't really believe in coming out.

I'm just like, why can't we just exist?

I've been doing this for a long time and I just didn't talk about it.

Whoops.

So then she said, like, thanks for outing me on the carpet.

So I'm like always the first one to blame the publication.

You know, I feel like they're sneaky and

bad intended, you know, bad faith actors, if you will.

However, like I'm really not understanding why she's mad.

Yeah, because she said what she said in her interview and for a lot of people.

And that was fabulous news.

Go off.

That was the first time that they knew.

Same.

So then that was the outage.

Right.

And then they asked, how did the outage go?

And she said, I didn't intend to be outed.

Yeah.

But then she also doesn't seem mad about it.

I'm not sure.

I can't get a read on her tone in this caption.

So it's important to keep that in mind.

I think maybe she's not mad.

And then also she was on the toilet.

And then there's the toilet part.

And the toilet.

Which we'll get to.

We'll get to.

And the toilet being the hallmark picture of the carousel.

So it's giving.

Right, photo number one.

You know, I want to flush variety down the toilet energy.

It's giving variety stinks.

Yeah.

Right?

Pooh poo variety.

Pooh poo variety is what she's saying.

I think, but also, hey, look at my belt.

But also, hey, look at my belt.

There's a lot going on here.

And I'm not an expert.

Like, I'm not going to be able to like fully transcribe this for you guys.

However, what I will say is it's giving, hey, look at my belt.

It is.

So you also see her outfit on the carpet.

I I did, and I didn't understand it, but I'm really not like a fashionable person.

You know, I'm wearing leggings.

So I, again, I'm not going to try and translate this for everyone.

Yeah.

She was also at the LACMA Academy red carpet.

Oh, let me go look at her look there because that's where everyone wore their best threads.

It wasn't, um, it was not my favorite.

But I just want to see like what era she's in, you know, because she like, she commits.

Yeah.

I think she's in this sort of like androgynous era, if I were to guess.

Yeah, but this is a Simla.

It's a Simla, but it's kind of like a masculine Simla, don't you think?

Like, yes, because it's a blazer, but pinstripe.

Yeah.

But there's breasts.

There is breasts.

The thing is, Billie Eilish is a creative and she's an artist.

And she's also a young girl growing up right in front of our eyes.

So I think we're going to see her through these

eras, if you will, you know, stylistically and creatively.

So I think maybe she's in, you know,

I don't know.

Yeah, she's trying new things.

She's trying new things.

New styles.

I do agree.

I guess I think I actually know what she was trying to say.

But it came off sounding like rude and like she was mad.

But I think what she was trying to say is like, it shouldn't have to be that you have this like big affair when you come out.

Like love who you love, whatever.

I think that's really what she was trying to say, but it came off like a little pretentious.

Like she was like yelling at people.

Yeah, I think that was like half of what she was trying to say, which is like, I don't want to have to come out like this is just who I am, but then also

upsetting

at 11 a.m.

Yeah.

Right.

At 11 a.m.

nonetheless.

Which it's, oh no, it's past 11 a.m.

now.

Yeah, this has been a nice long episode.

Yeah.

I mean, it's Monday and you saw pet psychics.

So of course, we have a lot to talk about.

We have a lot to break down.

So it starts and ends with the pet psychic.

Yeah.

Tell her that Bruno is not happy.

Maybe she can sense that.

Maybe she can sense it.

She definitely senses it.

But Bruno's feelings are hurt.

He said, mom, I'm just a lover.

I said, I know, Bru.

I know your intentions, but it's intention versus impact.

And you're eating, I think, and you're eating his food and you're sitting on his couch.

The pet psychic said that she felt like Bruno was a bad faith actor.

That's what she said.

And that's where I'll leave it.

I'll stand up for my boy till the

That's our show, you guys.

Thank you so much for listening to the Toast of Millennium Morning Show, where we deliver the fast five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

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Have an amazing Monday.

We'll see you on Tuesday.

Hashtag do strong.

Hashtag look at my belt.

Love you.

Bye.

Bye.