Those Who Can't Read, Watch with Taylor Strecker: Thursday, April 20th, 2023

57m
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  • Twilight TV Series in the Works (The Hollywood Reporter) (29:28)
  • Khloe Kardashian Considers Going On ‘Love is Blind’ with ‘Single Sisters’ (Page Six) (35:54)
  • Katy Perry Booed by ‘American Idol’ Audience After Criticizing Contestant’s Outfit (Page Six) (45:24)
  • Serena Williams Will Serve Up a New Memoir, Insiders Say (Page Six) (49:06)
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    Transcript

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    Good morning, Millennials.

    Welcome back to the toast.

    Happy Thursday.

    I am humbled and honored to be joined by one of, I say this about everyone, but like, I really mean it with you.

    My favorite guest co-host, Jackie, is out today, and my queen Taylor Streker, hey girl, hey, Hey

    stunning.

    Oh my god.

    I'm so happy to be back.

    The FOMO I felt last week.

    I just want everyone to know I was invited.

    I was away.

    Yes.

    Okay.

    I knew you were going to say that.

    Taylor is always one of my first.

    It's like literally Ben, Margo, and Taylor.

    It's a family.

    Thank you.

    And Taylor was unavailable last week, but it was good.

    We got to get some other people on the couch.

    But you're back now.

    Jealous.

    And jealous.

    I love all the people.

    I know.

    I'm not saying.

    It's okay to be jealous.

    Jealousy is like such a normalized jealousy.

    Let's normalize jealousy.

    I'm a jealous girl.

    There's not one thing that goes on on the internet that I'm not jealous of.

    Like, I see people hanging out.

    I'm jealous.

    I see people working with brands, jealous.

    I see people getting opportunities jealous.

    I am jealous.

    I'm a fiercely, like, competitive and jealous person.

    Me too.

    And I'm psychotic with my wife.

    I had the worst dream last night that she cheated on me.

    Okay, again.

    You know, we've been friends now.

    I was trying to do the math for like eight years.

    And I only recently learned that you are like a crazy, psychotic, jealous wife.

    And by the way, I'm a jealous person, like crazy.

    But when it comes to bed, I'm actually like not at all.

    You know, I envy that because, like, and this is the thing is: Tay gets so personally insulted.

    Right.

    She's like, what do you think of me?

    Yeah.

    But it's, I think it's because I'm so, and not that you're not obsessed with Ben, but like, you know what it is?

    I know what it is.

    Okay.

    I truly feel like I'm a Lesie only for Tay.

    Right.

    But like, I'm so deep in it now that like, what would I do?

    I know.

    So you know what?

    I feel like you need some sort of reality check, Taylor.

    Like, you are a lesbian.

    Like, it's okay.

    It's cool.

    It's good.

    I know.

    You're in denial.

    I know.

    I'm aware.

    I don't know.

    I just like, I just don't know what I would do.

    Well, you know, you don't have to do anything.

    She loves you very much.

    She loves you.

    She's not going anywhere.

    Like, you're okay.

    Maybe it's because

    I was divorced.

    I'm like, marriage means shit.

    You have trauma for sure that

    you carry around with you.

    I have firing trauma.

    You do.

    I have divorce trauma.

    I have cancellation trauma.

    It's okay.

    We all have our things.

    Yes.

    It's going to be okay.

    I love you.

    I'm so excited that you're here.

    You You weren't here last week, but it's not because you were just like dilly-dallying, getting drunk.

    I mean, I'm sure you were getting drunk, but you were working.

    You were out all week last week.

    You were on tour.

    You were opening for Stasi Schroeder.

    Everyone here loves Stasi on her tour.

    Tell me about that.

    It's so great.

    So last week was our first like leg.

    Is that what we call them?

    Legs.

    So like on any given tour, you have like X amount of shows.

    So we, I think, have, I think we're up to like 27 shows at this point.

    We keep adding new dates.

    Good.

    Stasi's going to work up until her third trimester.

    Right.

    So thank God she's pregnant.

    Otherwise, she wouldn't stop.

    There would be no end in sight.

    Right.

    And I love her and I love working with her, but like it is road life is exhausting.

    It's not fabulous like people think it is.

    I mean, and Stasi even is quite bougie.

    You stay at very nice hotels.

    You can't even enjoy it.

    You're in, you're out.

    You're in your outfit.

    And like when you're there before the show, like you're having terrible anxieties.

    You can't even enjoy like the beautiful hotel.

    Nope.

    And then once you're there, you're done and you want to celebrate.

    You got to move on to the next show.

    Yeah, you can't even, but your adrenaline is like kicking in.

    Yeah.

    So Stasi's like a very good check to some balance for me and Bo because we'll stay up till like three in the morning.

    I know you will.

    Drinking and she's like, bitch, get out of my room.

    I have been telling you, like, I really have been wanting you to get into stand-up because I feel like it's definitely a skill that not everyone has.

    And I think that you really could do it.

    You know, first of all, it means the world.

    Second of all,

    I'm like letting myself believe you.

    No, I really, I don't say things just to be nice.

    I'm not telling you.

    Literally, no, you don't.

    No, like I'm not, I'll tell you when you do bad.

    Like, you know, tell everybody

    what you said to me.

    Okay.

    Okay.

    So we go on tour.

    We started in Minneapolis.

    Vibe.

    I had no idea.

    Two nights in Chicago, incredible.

    And then two nights in Royal.

    I'm sorry, two shows in Royal Oak, a matinee,

    and then a night show.

    Matinees are brutal, but the audience was fantastic.

    We were just dying because we were so tired.

    We did five, Royal Oak was great too.

    Five shows in four days.

    Psychotic.

    So on the first night, like I felt so invested in your journey.

    Oh, sweet.

    I just, I wanted to be there so bad because I felt like we went through over your material a lot.

    And I felt like I was a part of it.

    Like I really wanted to know how it went.

    So Taylor recorded her first set and sent me it as a voice note afterwards.

    And I was like, I was prepared to give you like bad notes.

    What were you thinking?

    Like for real, real.

    So I've never seen you perform.

    Yeah.

    And my first kind of intro into seeing you do any sort of like live performance slash stand-up was when we were in Lisbon, Portugal for Brian's birthday.

    On the final night of his big party, he rented out a club and we did the roast of Brian Kelly.

    And Brian asked a bunch of people from different parts of his life to roast him.

    And I said no.

    You did say no.

    And I wanted you to do it.

    Like I pushed you.

    I said.

    I said, Brian wants you to do it, even though Brian was okay with you canceling.

    I hate.

    I wanted you to push yourself.

    Like, I know that you can do it.

    Like, I really can.

    But

    so

    in Lisbon, Taylor was not great.

    And I would never have said anything.

    I told you you did great.

    What's the point in making someone like feel like shit?

    It's over.

    I know, but like I embarrassed myself in front of all of our friends.

    You didn't embarrass anyone.

    Your son.

    I was at all.

    I was the worst.

    You were.

    I was the worst.

    I was the worst.

    You weren't the worst.

    But whatever.

    So honestly, that was like, oh, damn.

    Maybe like, maybe I saw something in her that wasn't there.

    Maybe I was just seeing things.

    And then she sent me her voice memo from her first performance, and you were just amazing.

    Like, you, I was so shocked.

    You sounded so confident.

    You sounded like a comic who's been doing this for 40 years.

    Really?

    And maybe it was just like your smoker's cough that gave you that sort of edge, but you were incredible.

    You were so confident.

    You were so funny.

    And like, I knew what you were, you know, memorized to say, and I know that you were adding stuff, and you didn't seem nervous at all.

    And then I felt comfortable telling you that you stunk it up in Lisbon because that didn't really matter.

    That wasn't a paid gig or anything.

    It didn't.

    I will say this.

    I was out of my element in Lisbon because I'm not good at roast.

    I'm good at making fun of me.

    Yes.

    I'm very bad at making fun of other people.

    I hate it.

    Such a

    fair critique because, say, my whole brand of comedy is just making fun of myself because you know what everyone's so sensitive so so if i'm making fun of myself nobody can be mad and brian's like brian can hang he's fun he's tough but like i feel like brian like if you cross a line it could be like random like you made a joke about the river and even afterwards like weeks after he was like but do you really not like the river i know he's very connected to the delaware river scary i know so i almost ran up to you in lisbon and said cut me And I knew that we had somebody that added that night.

    So I was like, the space is filled.

    I honestly regret not doing that.

    Really?

    But I feel like moments like that are what like build character in a performer.

    And I feel like you maybe wouldn't have crushed as hard as you did last week if you didn't flop in Lisbon.

    It was a really good trial run.

    And it like got me get to get my shit together because the whole time I was getting ready for tour, I was like, you don't want to be like Lisbon where it was last minute and you were freaking out.

    No, and you don't want it to be such a long period of time since you've been in front of a crowd.

    So true.

    So you know what?

    I feel like I made the right choice.

    Well, thank you for the feedback.

    I mean, all of it.

    You are incredible.

    I cannot.

    I'm going to go to your show.

    You guys are playing Town Hall in New York.

    I'm totally coming.

    Oh, 100%.

    I literally moved my flight because I'm going to Dallas, but I'm coming home early to see it.

    Angel.

    I'm so excited.

    It's going to be so fun.

    That's going to be a nerve-wracking show, though.

    That in LA, because then it's like people you know in the audience.

    Exactly.

    And like, I mean, by the time we get there, I think I'll know it so inside and out.

    It won't matter.

    But New York and LA are interesting because they're industry towns.

    Yeah.

    And industry is like too cool for school.

    So a lot of people in the audience, especially when it's like a lot of comps that are like agents and managers and shit like that, you don't get great laughs and great audience interaction.

    So it can be scary.

    I will say on tour, I would say probably my worst performing myself, like I did the worst in LA.

    I was so panicked.

    Ben invited like so many celebrities.

    You know, Ben, he's like wheeling and dealing.

    Of course.

    I have this whole thing in my show about Twilight.

    And like literally, I'm looking at Taylor Lautner.

    Like it was horrible.

    Too much.

    It was hard.

    Too hard.

    It was horrible.

    Before we, I want to talk to you about what we did last night, but I just wanted to remind everyone, our first merch launch since our rebrand happened this morning.

    If you go to toastmerch.com, we have new crew necks, new phone cases, new mugs.

    I'm wearing one today.

    This is the teal one.

    We've been wearing them all week.

    Jackie and I both wear a size large.

    We know you guys have been waiting for a merch launch, and we took our time with this one because we had new logos and we wanted it to be really good and really toasty.

    Toastmerch.com.

    I know a bunch of you already got your merch, but I just wanted to remind you that that was today.

    Isn't that embroidered?

    It is embroidered.

    Thank you for eating it.

    Embroiderer.

    I'm obsessed.

    Oh, let me connect you with my embroiderer.

    Thank you.

    Last night, we're going to dive into the past five, but I want to talk about what we did last night because I was floored.

    Were you?

    Let me tell you a fun fact about me, and I don't even know if you know this.

    I, and it's so crazy because I'm such a Showtunes girl.

    Do you hate?

    I hate going to the theater.

    Like, I,

    with the exception of Funny Girl, which I most recently saw.

    Yes, of course.

    And before that, you couldn't get me to the theater for years.

    I saw D'Arvin Hansen, which was incredible.

    It was.

    Did you see Hamilton?

    No.

    Get out.

    I know.

    I saw it twice.

    I just low-key, like, don't like going to the theater.

    I know that's so crazy.

    No, I'm with you, actually, because, well, first of all, like the seats are so fucking small.

    Was your ass killing you last night?

    Killing.

    And like, we were in dope seats.

    Brian, of course, brought front row tickets, which is a wild experience and very valuable given what we do for a living.

    Cause like you never really know what it's like for people in the front row.

    I know.

    It's a lot.

    It's a lot.

    And I felt like my face, like I wanted to be smiling the whole time for them.

    I didn't want to give negative energy.

    Right.

    Like when I'm enjoying something, my mouth is just closed and I just look like I'm miserable, but I'm enjoying it, but I'm not smiling, you know?

    But as performers, we know what that feels like on stage.

    Yeah.

    So I know I was like, I mean, I was getting it up for those performers.

    I had sat front row in a Broadway show once, like many, many, many years ago.

    Me and Ben saw

    Matilda.

    Why?

    I don't know.

    And the kid actors were wearing microphones, but the microphones were...

    taped to their hair down their hairline and then dangled over their forehead and it looked like this little ball sack It was like this little flesh colored ball.

    And me and Ben didn't know what it was.

    We were like, what?

    Do all these kids have like growths on their foreheads?

    It was so bizarre.

    Now, last night they were just wearing mics strapped to their cheeks, which is much more normal.

    Yes.

    And so just precursor saying that I dislike the theater.

    Like I love show tunes and I have a lot of respect, but just as an experience, I don't like sitting in a theater.

    No, I'm actually with you too.

    It gives me a lot of anxiety.

    Like, especially if I'm sitting in the middle, I'm worried about peeing.

    I get a lot of anxiety.

    I feel you.

    And I find that like almost every single Broadway show is 30 minutes too long.

    Agreed.

    I think a lot of shows could deal with no intermission and just doing one 90-minute show instead of two and a half hours.

    And let's cut all the slow songs.

    So having said that, I was definitely like, you know, let's get through this.

    I was not like overjoyed

    to be going to the theater.

    We saw Anne Juliet, which is like a very modern adaptation of Romeo and Juliet, but it's told through the lens of like what would have happened if actually Juliet didn't die.

    And then she goes on this journey of self-discovery.

    Yes.

    And the music, it's not an original score.

    It is set to the music,

    the catalog of music of legendary pop producer Max Martin.

    And I'm sure a lot of you guys have never heard of him, but every song you've ever liked in your life is Max Martin.

    Backstreet Boys,

    Ariana Grande, Britney Spears, InSync.

    It's from the early 1990s up until most recently, The Weekend.

    Taylor Swift.

    He was the main producer on 1989 by Taylor Swift.

    Oh my God.

    He is so, you will know every single song.

    I knew every single song.

    And there was even some like deep cuts in there, like Domino by Jesse J.

    Like, that's not a me.

    I was obsessed.

    Obsessed.

    So I knew I was going to like the music.

    And I was just,

    I was blown away.

    I,

    it was amazing.

    It was incredible.

    And also, like, the actress kept spinning on me, which I loved.

    Yeah.

    Usually I would not like that.

    Yeah.

    But because they were so talented, I thought maybe they'd spittle talent onto me.

    It was, Juliet was insane.

    So a major shout out to the actress who played Juliet and who played William Shakespeare's wife named Anne Hathaway, who knew that.

    She was, and you know what I was thinking the whole time?

    I was thinking, this like show reminds me weirdly and just kind of like a lot of the jokes reminds me of Schitt's Creek.

    I know that sounds random.

    And then I was looking at their Instagram today and the person who wrote the show is the writer of Schitt's Creek.

    No shit.

    Isn't that crazy?

    Not to say like I have like a, you know, like some sort of like talent for like, you know, whatever.

    But I was like, especially the Anne Hathaway character.

    She reminded me so much of Jocelyn from Schitt's Creek.

    Yep.

    And the way she spoke.

    And I was like, oh, it's just giving Schitt's Creek energy.

    And then I was shocked to see that.

    It was incredible.

    I can't recommend it enough.

    Like, it felt like fun, Hamilton.

    It was fun.

    Yes.

    It was hysterical.

    Hysterical.

    The vocals on Juliet.

    That's fine.

    That is genuinely like what I think I sound like when I sing.

    And it was nice to hear someone actually sound like that, you know?

    Like, that's what I think.

    I'm like doing all these runs on Celine Dion.

    Like, that's what I think I sound like.

    I don't, but that's what I think I do.

    She sang one song that at the end,

    oh my God, Katy Perry roar was like this moment at the end when Juliet like gets to be herself or whatever and she gets on this floating terrace that like floats through the theater.

    Oh my god.

    Unbelievable.

    I will say this too.

    I feel like there's not a bad seat in the theater.

    So get tickets.

    You don't have to be front row to enjoy it.

    No.

    But we did get to stand up at the end and dance.

    Yeah, everyone was like giving me shit.

    They're like, you were filming at a Broadway show.

    It was the end.

    It was the final song.

    They asked everyone to get up on their feet.

    Like it was a film-friendly.

    And sorry, I wanted to post and support the arts.

    Oh, God, people.

    Broadway, like etiquette, like enforcers, fuck off.

    Yep.

    I'm not like one of those people who like falls asleep and is on their phone the whole time.

    Like I have respect for the theater.

    Also, what is your take on singing along to the songs?

    Because here's the thing.

    Everyone knows the songs.

    You were like

    in, but like you were like quiet whispers.

    I was.

    That's actually a good point.

    I was conscious of my volume for sure.

    Not the lady next to me.

    Was she?

    Like, there was like three of them.

    I think they must have like swapped seats during intervention.

    I don't know.

    I'm not sure that.

    Yes.

    And they were freaks and they were like singing loud.

    I wanted to be like, shut the fuck up.

    I didn't come here to listen to you fucking sing.

    Oh, that is annoying.

    Annoying.

    Especially in the front row.

    That's probably like a little disruptive to the performers.

    Right?

    For sure.

    I know.

    I did not love.

    I got the eye of the tiger of fire

    dancing through the.

    Oh my God.

    It was so good of you guys.

    And like, I just want to say, like, I am not a person who gives out compliments to Broadway shows.

    Like, I'm very particular.

    Really?

    Like, the last one, the shows I've seen in the last probably 10 years are this, Funny Girl, which you die for, and Diera Vinhansen.

    Damn, which are like obviously two of the biggest shows like of the last decade.

    So I have a high bar.

    And so if I recommend it, it's good.

    Recommended.

    Recommended.

    Very much so.

    Oh, it was my birthday present from Brian.

    Oh, right.

    And Claudette crashed because she was going to kill us.

    Well, Claudette crashed because I've been saying I want to see this show.

    And then Taylor's like, oh, Brian got me tickets for my birthday.

    I'm like, oh, what show?

    And Juliette, are you fucking kidding?

    No, I said something, Juliet.

    Oh, you didn't even know.

    You didn't even know.

    You don't support the arts, Taylor.

    You don't support the arts.

    So before we start, I do want to say today is Theo's birthday.

    Happy birthday.

    Thank you.

    It's tough.

    You know, being a dog mom is not like a celebratory thing when your dog has a birthday.

    How old is he?

    Six.

    That's

    getting up there.

    Shut the fuck up.

    You're a bitch.

    You're a bitch.

    Get out of my studio.

    Me and Ben cried last night before Mad.

    Yeah.

    It's just like, oh my God.

    Honestly, I don't want want to talk about it because I feel like myself I'm starting to cry.

    No, no, no.

    I'm old.

    Theo's old.

    It's fine.

    You like old people.

    That's true.

    I am drawn towards like more wise, older people.

    He's like me.

    He's over the hill.

    But you are fucking bitch.

    Get out.

    But still kicking.

    That's my point.

    You better shut the fuck up.

    I'm over the hill.

    Over the hill.

    I'm over the hill.

    Theo?

    Oh, my God.

    This is disgusting.

    Toaster is get her.

    Please, God.

    Leave hate comments on her Instagram at Taylor Streicher.

    I was just trying to relate to him.

    You can't.

    Okay.

    She's a dog and you're a human.

    Okay.

    Okay.

    So I guess without further ado, it's time to dive into the past five stories, if we must.

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    All right, first story.

    We actually have an update from something Jackie and I spoke about earlier in the week.

    So I don't know if you've been keeping up with the Coachella drama.

    A little bit.

    I'm not really a Coachella girl yet.

    I'm aware.

    Neither am I.

    But Frank Ocean was the headliner.

    There's two weekends of Coachella.

    One was last weekend, one was this weekend.

    He was the big headliner, final act on Sunday night.

    He stunk up the place.

    He cut his set short.

    He literally was like, sorry, it's curfew.

    I gotta go.

    No.

    He stood there like with his music playing on an ox chord and like didn't even sing.

    There was like dancers standing right in front of him.

    People couldn't see him.

    What?

    It was very, people were really upset because he's like a lot of big, a lot of huge fans and he hasn't performed live in many years.

    And this was supposed to be like a big deal.

    I guess this is why.

    I guess this is why.

    And now he has dropped out for weekend two.

    That's psychotic.

    First of all, contractually, can he even do that?

    He will be losing a ton of money.

    I don't even know if now they have to pay him for the first one.

    That's crazy.

    I mean, think about this.

    Like, how much money is on the table?

    Millions, 10 million.

    So I think

    last I heard headliners get paid like $6 million for two performances.

    Wow, man.

    Just go out there and like make Fart noises.

    Just do it.

    Just do it.

    I can't.

    Think about what would be going on that you were like, I simply cannot.

    Unless it was like a death in the family.

    Like you just go.

    Or like a medical emergency.

    But like, don't you think that they would say that it was?

    No, but and that's what I was saying last week.

    Like even some sort of like medical emergency, like Beyonce, she had a broken leg, she would do it.

    Absolutely.

    Fucking lootly.

    You know?

    So not only is he dropped out, which is a kind of a crazy historic thing that hasn't really happened, they have replaced Frank Ocean with Blink 182.

    Oh, don't tell Ben and Tay.

    I know.

    They're going They're literally going to get flights.

    They're going to drag us there.

    Well, so Blink 182 actually performed at Coachella last weekend as a, not a headliner, like during the day.

    So I don't know.

    I mean, I think they're an equal replacement.

    Like, I think the people who go to Coachella will love Blink 182.

    Right.

    But I wouldn't be surprised if people like demand.

    Refunds because I think a lot of people bought tickets just for Frank Ocean.

    And if you're like a major Frank Ocean fan, I don't think there's a lot of crossover between Blink 182.

    I would go to all the shows and then I would demand a refund.

    Yeah, of course.

    Of course, of course, of course.

    By the way, and I saw Blink 182's performance at Coachella and like they're very good and it's Travis Barker.

    Yeah, but like it doesn't give me headliner vibes.

    I know.

    It gives me headliner vibes for like a 90s festival.

    Yes.

    Not for Coachelli.

    No.

    I was really shocked to see that he,

    so his reasoning for not performing, so he said, after suffering an injury to his leg on the festival grounds in the week leading up to the show, Frank Ocean was unable to perform the intended show last weekend, but was still intent on performing for the second weekend.

    But in 72 hours, the show was reworked out of necessity.

    So the doctor's advice is that the artist is not able to perform weekend two due to two fractures and a sprain in his left leg.

    Wimp.

    So that's the line they're going with.

    A sprain?

    Yeah.

    So this is a Frank Ocean added a statement saying, it was chaotic.

    There is some beauty and chaos.

    It isn't what I intended to show, but I did enjoy being out there and I'll see you all soon.

    So he's admitting that he kind of flopped and he's blaming the

    That's weak sauce.

    Yeah.

    And also it doesn't like really bode well for the future of his career.

    I just don't know if a lot of people are going to feel confident booking him for festivals.

    I have a confession.

    I don't think I know one Frank Ocean song.

    You're not alone.

    Really?

    I don't think I know one either.

    I don't even think I know what it looks like.

    I do.

    He's extremely handsome and cute.

    In that case, I take back everything I said.

    And by the way, I've heard him perform like songs and he is an, like, I get, he's hyped up for a reason.

    Like, he has an incredible singing voice, and he's an extremely talented songwriter.

    Um, and this, there's a reason why after six years, people are like dying.

    And there's a very high bar when, when you've waited that long.

    You know, I think I understand now why he bailed out.

    He has pretty privilege.

    We know what that's like because we have pretty privilege, too.

    We're two beautiful women who are constantly just being given opportunities just because of our looks and not because of our talent.

    I feel like he was like, he's not used to failing because he's so beautiful.

    Yeah.

    And he's he's not used to people telling him that he like sucked.

    Right.

    Like the way that you told me I sucked in Lisbon.

    Like he couldn't handle that.

    Sucked.

    I just, what did I say?

    Stunk up the place.

    Stunk up the place.

    I feel like that's an accurate representation.

    I'm sorry.

    So, yeah.

    Would you ever go to Coachella?

    Literally never.

    You're like the antithesis of Coachella in my mind.

    Me too.

    Sounds like hell.

    Although I do love a jam band.

    Not that Coachella's that, but like I was once upon a time a festival girly.

    You were.

    Yeah, I slept in tents.

    I went to Modown.

    What?

    I did the drugs.

    What's Mowdown?

    I don't know.

    I was invited and I was.

    Is it a festival?

    Yeah, it's a, I think it's a band called Mo.

    And it was Mowtown?

    Just Mo.

    And it was a festival with like other bands.

    It's like, it gives like fish vibes.

    Got it, got it, got it, got it.

    Yeah.

    Okay, tell me about you camping.

    Not well.

    I have my period, so let's not even.

    I feel like Liam McSweeney and Real Housewives Ultimate Girls trip.

    No, but you know what?

    That's an important fact for like why you didn't have a good time.

    Horrible.

    Camping with your period, a bear would come and eat your vagina.

    Literally, well, luckily, I was protected by piles of poop, so it was fine.

    It was a nightmare.

    There was like the porter potties were overflowing.

    People were on like so messed up on drugs, they were just taking shits wherever they pleased.

    Woodstock energy.

    I brought my Taylor guitar.

    My mom bought me for Christmas.

    How old were you?

    I was like 18 or 19.

    Oh, okay, okay.

    Cause like I could not see any version of you that I currently know even thinking about doing that.

    So like freshman year of college, I like had a lot of identities and this is one of them.

    It was my hippie girl identity and it did not survive.

    I literally left there and I was like, everybody I just came with, I absolutely hate.

    Never want to see again.

    Never again.

    Can I ask you a question that might be a little personal?

    I'm just curious because I've never asked you anyway.

    I love to ask you like invasive questions about you and Tay.

    Yes.

    When you were in college, did you ever have an experimental phase?

    Never.

    Really?

    I never even kissed a girl before, Tay.

    Like, seriously, I kissed my friend Leah,

    senior year, no, junior year of college for Peta Pit because we were so hungry and we were so broke, we had no money left.

    And the boys that we hung out with were like, if you guys kiss, we'll buy a pita pit for you, which is very problematic looking back.

    Boys are so deeply disgusting and unwell.

    So we did it.

    And it And did we get the PETA?

    I got the PETA PIT.

    I got extra.

    What's that?

    I got extra pic.

    Are you for real?

    I don't know.

    It's the greatest thing on the face of the planet.

    What is it?

    It's just PETA with shit inside, but it's so good.

    Is it Peta Pit the name of the institution?

    Yes, Peta Pit.

    And then you get the PETA and it's like, you just create your own, build your own.

    I get it.

    It's like Israeli food.

    But the PETA Pit is the name of the restaurant by your college.

    Yes.

    So why the fuck would I know that?

    It's well, it's a chain.

    Oh, it's a chain.

    Yes, yes.

    Do they have one in the city?

    Should we go?

    I don't think it exists anymore.

    Damn.

    But we should try to find one.

    We could drive to upstate New York.

    My personal college experience, similar, was called University Pita.

    Okay.

    And it was like an, it wasn't even a restaurant.

    It was literally a window in the wall.

    Like you would, it was on the street.

    Like you literally walk on the street and you look to your right and the man is standing in the window.

    And it was like this hole in the wall.

    You could, there was nowhere to sit.

    And you would just get the most amazing schnitzel, schwarma, laffa, pita.

    And it was kosher.

    So like we ate that shit.

    Driving.

    And they closed shortly after like my freshman or sophomore year.

    And it was devastating for the community.

    Rest in peace.

    Bring back university PETA.

    And for short, we would call it you, PETA.

    Oh, my God.

    It's so cool.

    You just felt so cool when you said that.

    I just wanted to learn what the cool and what you kids were doing at the time.

    Were you cool in college?

    I literally lived at home the last three years of college.

    I recently learned this.

    Yes.

    My college experience was, I don't even like to call it college, you know?

    My freshman year, like, I tried.

    I lived in the dorms.

    I tried.

    But the thing is, like, I went to college with so many of my friends from high school because I went to

    high school in the city.

    So, like, Abe, who you know, and my best friends from college were just my best friends from high school.

    But I did make one friend, Margo Fish.

    She was a college friend, but she, like, she went to a Jewish high school in New Jersey.

    Like, it really wasn't that crazy.

    And I didn't really go out.

    I didn't, like, have a lot of college friends.

    And then I met Ben.

    So my last three years of college, I lived at home and just hung out with Ben.

    Honestly, though, you were building like a brand.

    The way I'm so jealous of your college experience being like uncollegey.

    Well, see, it's both because I feel like I, I don't think I would be at the place I'm at now in terms of career if I didn't like just waste away those last three years of college like building a brand instead of like going out.

    Yes.

    But now I'm very much like living my college years in terms of partying.

    Like I don't, I didn't party at all in college.

    So when I got out of college and I was like hanging out with Jackie and Jackie's friends and you and Brian, like that's when I became like I act like a college freshman when I go out.

    Yeah, but growing up.

    But I did the college thing and I'm still acting like it.

    Yeah, well, you're deeply problematic.

    Facts.

    Nobody on this planet can hold their liquor better than you.

    It's beyond impressive.

    Well, lately, I've been a little bit more of like a wimp when it comes to my drinking in a good way.

    Like I'm embracing it.

    Like last night, I had a martini.

    Did I finish it?

    No.

    The answer is no.

    I had a glass of sincerity.

    Did I finish that?

    Yes.

    The answer is yes.

    And then Brian ordered me like a vodka.

    I had like three sips.

    And then at the thing, I got a scotch and soda.

    Scotch and soda double, but I didn't finish it.

    Baby steps.

    Also, at the Broadway show last night, Taylor was very generous to be the one to get drinks during

    intermission.

    Yes.

    And she brought me a tequila soda that was made with poison.

    And I took one sip and I was like, I don't think I can do this.

    And then I'm like watching this show and I'm getting fucking itchy.

    I look down.

    I have hives on my arm.

    I know.

    And my throat is.

    Are they still there?

    My throat was really scratchy.

    I went home and took a Benadryl.

    I was like, I actually kind of freaked out.

    I don't know what the tequila brand was, but never.

    It was definitely like Jose Cuerbo.

    It was just giving me like hives.

    Isn't that crazy?

    Awful.

    I'm sorry.

    Well, I would go camping with you, by the way.

    I think that would be only if we could like vlog it.

    I'm so in.

    Let's go like someplace fabulous, though.

    Like a camp.

    Yeah.

    But glamping is still camping.

    If you have to like leave a

    tent and go even to a like bathroom that has plumbing, but you have to walk outside.

    Yeah.

    That's dangerous.

    We should go.

    Let's do it.

    But one night only.

    Okay, fine.

    We can go up to Ithaca.

    They have glamping.

    And we can get pita pit.

    We can get pita pit.

    I also just like like camping because I really, weirdly like the food that goes along with camping, like hot dogs, mores and like grilling.

    Yes.

    I like a hamburger.

    What really do you eat?

    Yeah, I know.

    Like, I just like the smells of camping.

    Does that make sense?

    Yes, it does.

    Like, and I love nature.

    I would love to like look at the stars with you.

    Okay, I'm in.

    Okay.

    Let's do it.

    All right.

    Next up, and I have a question.

    I just realized I don't know this about you.

    So are you a Twilight girl at all?

    I actually am.

    Again, I feel like I'm a little like aged out of like the obsessiveness.

    Yes, that's fair.

    But I was working at Sirius, I think, when it came out.

    And so I was like in it because it was like Twilight Mania.

    Right.

    So I get it.

    And I didn't hate the movies.

    No, I was absolutely head over heels in love.

    Like literally can't watch them enough times, obsessed, would quite literally do anything to spend one night with Robert Pattinson.

    Okay, so we're different in that way.

    Well, because you're a lesbian.

    No.

    Are you Jacob?

    No, I'm not like sexually attracted to any of the vampires or werewolves.

    What about Carlisle?

    He's a nice, like, older gentleman.

    No, I just, it's maybe Kristen Stewart.

    Oh.

    That makes sense.

    Okay.

    Well, there is a Twilight TV series that now is in the works.

    The Twilight Saga is getting the television treatment at sources tell the Hollywood Reporter that a series version of the author's best-selling book series is in early development at Lionsgate.

    So

    why?

    I don't know.

    They have great people attached to it, like the writer of Tell Me Lies, The Walking Dead, but they're working with Lionsgate to determine what the specific take on Twilight will be and if it will be a remake of Stephanie Myers' original books or a different offshoot.

    So they don't know what they're doing, but they're trying to make a TV show that's somehow loosely associated with Twilight.

    Well, listen, they made The Last of Us based off of a friggin' video game.

    Oh, did they?

    It was the best thing ever.

    Let me watch it.

    Oh, I love it.

    And I'm not really into apocalyptic zombies.

    Neither am I.

    Like, I never watched The Walking Dead.

    I was really into it.

    Give it a shot.

    The first episode kind of will have you be like, meh, and then it gets good.

    Well, so this TV show, like this news must have just gotten leaked because it doesn't have a network or a platform yet or apparently any sort of creative concept.

    But a lot of people are like, well, why the the fuck do we need a TV show about Twilight when there's five books and five movies?

    Like, this just seems like a money grab.

    Because we can never get enough of shit.

    I know.

    And it's like, Twilight is perfect.

    The movies were perfect.

    I wouldn't touch a hair on their head.

    You know, I'm also concerned about the Tell Me Lies

    writer.

    You didn't like it?

    I mean, I watched it and I was obsessed with it, but it's shit.

    It's terrible.

    Oh, I love me and Jackie.

    Loved.

    Yeah, but love in like, this is bad.

    No, no.

    And we, and there is no writing.

    And I,

    facts.

    and it was also a book so it's like what did you write what did they write but i loved it like i was obsessed not in a bad way no i was obsessed but it was like a little bit of like a rant rah at the end well it was a big shocker too and there's another season well i'm in i'm gonna watch the second season it was so like you know the show sex lives yeah like that season i was so into did you watch the second season i had to stop i felt like i was taking acid i was humiliated to be watching was it okay i was watching i watched it on the plane to lisbon oh my god and honestly i had to

    I had to literally hide my iPad because it's quite literally porn.

    And the first season was porn, but like it had a heart and it had like good stories and good writing.

    This was humiliating.

    Like I was embarrassed to be watching it.

    And all I could think was the season's such like a stinker.

    And like she blew her entire life up, the lead.

    Yeah.

    To be with the male lead.

    And by the way, do you know who she was married to before?

    Yes, but I'm forgetting.

    Steve Howie from Reba.

    Reba.

    He's also from Shameless, but I know.

    Yes, yes.

    I know him from Reba.

    Yes, I love him.

    I don't think think he's so hot.

    So hot.

    She blew it.

    And yeah, this guy, Adam, is cute.

    And like, maybe if Dick was prosthetic or not, like, he has a big penis.

    Like, who fucking cares?

    No.

    And, like, they had, like, a family.

    Like, everyone.

    I know.

    And I feel like I understand like working with somebody and having this like chemistry.

    Chemistry.

    And then also the show is like this massive success.

    And you're like, we're going to be the it couple forever.

    And then

    like, wait till season two to like pull.

    Do they still do partner?

    I think so.

    I think so, too.

    She has to be together with him forever.

    I don't know after this season.

    It was like Geely level.

    Steve Howie's so hot.

    I am available, dude.

    No, and he gets like better looking with age.

    Oh, I'm obsessed with him.

    Me too.

    Oh, my God.

    He's a big, burly man.

    Yeah, yeah, yeah.

    Speaking of big, burly men.

    Yeah.

    Oh, my God.

    Jen Fessler?

    Real Houses of New Jersey.

    I'm not caught up, but continue.

    Having sex with Tony Soprano.

    Wait.

    Do you know the way?

    Wait, James Gandolfini.

    You got it.

    Yep.

    Years ago, she was a talent agent.

    And by the way, I'm obsessed with Jen Fessler.

    Absolutely.

    She should be, first of all, Jackie Goldschrinder keeps getting so much screen time time and she's in fucking sufferable.

    And Jen Fessler deserves the screen time.

    Continue.

    I mean, do you know that Tony Soprano is my number one?

    No, I didn't know that.

    If I had a hall pass, I mean, I should probably use it to someone who's alive.

    Right.

    But my God, the jealousy that was like seething out of my pores when she said that.

    And she sucked with him more than once.

    We reported this yesterday.

    Teddy Mellencamp said she revealed that she had a one-night stand with Matt Damon.

    I know.

    So that brings up, I was trying to think, other housewives have said Carol Radzwell had sex with George Clooney, or she went on a date with him.

    I can't remember which one.

    Dead.

    Now we have Jen Fessler and Tony Soprano and we have Matt Damon and Teddy Mellencamp.

    Yes.

    That's pretty good.

    I'm really proud of our housewives.

    But James Gandalfini is like your big burly man of choice.

    Number one.

    I would go with like Jason Momoa in terms of big burly man.

    And honestly, I feel like you might like him because he kind of looks like a woman with his long hair.

    You know who is his doppelganger?

    It pains me to admit because he's so hot.

    Sheena's husband, Brock.

    Sheena's husband Brock is cute, but you know, he cut his hair.

    No, that was his best feature.

    Well, actually, that brings me, that's a good, oh no, I don't have a Vanderpump Roll story.

    I thought I did.

    I mean, we didn't watch last night because we were out at the theater.

    It's on, it doesn't come out today.

    Thursday, yesterday, Wednesdays.

    I'm such an idiot.

    Damn it.

    No, that's okay.

    Yeah.

    I got my days mixed up.

    But back to this Twilight thing.

    I just wanted to say really quickly, like, I take Twilight really seriously because it's like how Ariana Maddox takes sketch comedy really seriously.

    Oh, my God.

    I'm dead.

    And

    I feel like the legacy of Twilight is so protected.

    And so many people make movies out of books and it's crap and it like ruins.

    It is perfect.

    and I it need not be touched yes I don't even want a reunion between the cast I want nothing I get it I understand it like just keep it sacred and I'm protective over it because it's weirdly like a franchise that means a lot to me and I will read the books one day but I I need everyone to stop okay and I'm happy for Stephanie Meyer because like she just wrote these weird books and ended up a billionaire and I love that for her yes she got to be in the fifth movie she was like a wedding guest and everyone was like oh my god it's Stephanie but she needs to stop yeah enough's enough enough's enough like just be happy with what you have or write something new stop milking it.

    She did, by the way, and what she did write was,

    it was kind of like a prequel told from the perspective.

    The whole book is told from the POV of Bella.

    Right.

    But now she wrote like a prequel from the POV of Edward and people loved it.

    I'm going to do something with that, but like leave the books alone.

    It sounds like Anne Juliet.

    It sounds like Anne Juliet.

    Today's episode is brought to you by Lululemon.

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    Okay, you ready for our next story?

    Yes, please.

    Are you caught up with Love is Blind?

    I am.

    Okay, I know your wife is obsessed, so I don't know if you were.

    Chloe Kardashian is considering going on Love is Blind with her single sisters.

    And daddy.

    So Chloe Kardashian joked about wanting her and her single sisters to go on the Netflix dating show, Love is Blind.

    She posted an Instagram.

    I guess she had like a good American event.

    And Alexa from last season, the Israeli queen, obsessed to To marry the country cowboy.

    Yep.

    And I just like did an Instagram stock of them just to make sure they were still happy.

    And they are.

    So she posted like a carousel.

    It was kind of crazy.

    She did an infeed carousel of just three pictures with Alexa.

    No other people, no other promo for the event.

    Just gave Alexa like her own time to shine.

    Fangirl.

    And she wrote, I think some of us single K sisters should go on LIB.

    What do you think?

    Yes.

    And, oh my God, it would be incredible.

    But that would have to be its own entire spin-off.

    I know that she, it would fuck it up because their voices are so recognized.

    recognizable.

    Totally.

    But like conceptually, and I think they would never, but like to do a dating show where they get to do like the Love is Blind thing, but nobody knows they're famous and they get to like really see people for who they are.

    What if they did like a spin-off where they did like Love is Blind and voice boxes?

    Well, Ben has the funniest idea that they should do the opposite of Love is Blind called Love is Shallow.

    Where you just like look at someone through a window and like you can't hear them and you just like try to communicate and you just pick someone based off their looks without them ever opening their mouth.

    Honestly, I feel like it might work.

    I think think it will be brilliant.

    And Netflix is always coming up with these like dumb dating shows, you know?

    Oh, love is blind is everything.

    This season, hands down, like if you haven't watched Love is Blind, like this is the one to get into.

    No, the first season is, I think, the best it'll ever be because nobody knew what the show was.

    And there were definitely people who came on the show to get famous.

    Zach, and like they're using the platform for what it is.

    But this was like, nobody knew what the fuck it was.

    Everybody on that first season, barely any of them are famous, like except for the couples that got married.

    And they were not thirsty.

    They were just regular people like doing this weird love experiment.

    When you say Zach, do you mean season four Zach?

    Or do you mean season four Zach?

    No, how dare you?

    He said for love is blind.

    What?

    Bliss?

    They're perfect.

    You know, he just got lucky because they were both so desperate for love.

    Like they

    sorry.

    I'm not going to like Zach would have Zach would have gone with anyone and Bliss like was like all right sure Bliss is an angel sent for God for

    but they're both incredibly desperate people.

    Yes, yes.

    That's why it worked.

    Yes, yeah.

    And I think they have a very happy life together and I don't mean that in a negative way.

    Yeah.

    But they only got together because they were desperate because I think a lot of other girls would have been too proud to go with somebody who chose someone else.

    Absolutely.

    And some people would not have the shame that Zach had, the balls to go, yeah, I chose the wrong girl, but you want to get married?

    Oh, Zach.

    Ugh, I have a special place in my heart.

    And Zach is over here, like, accusing Irena of wanting to go on the show for Famous.

    And Zach is calling Tianzia on himself at the airport and posting the clips on his Instagram.

    Stop.

    He does give homicidal vibes.

    To say the least.

    Like, when Irena 3Union was like, I'm not saying I was like scared.

    I was like, just say it.

    He's freaky.

    He gives you murder vibes.

    It's okay.

    It's okay.

    I think he's okay.

    He's nice.

    I don't think he'll murder Bliss.

    Well, we'll just have to wait until

    I hope not.

    You know, they say when a woman is murdered, the first and almost primary suspect is always the husband.

    I don't know.

    He gives me more like sneak out in the middle of the night and like be a serious.

    He's like a dog killer.

    Kill dogs on the side.

    Yeah, I think he was a safe pets.

    But that's until he escalates to people.

    I really do like him.

    I really don't, actually.

    I think like he was playing such such the victim card to the point where he became the villain.

    Like, he was loving being the victim because Irina was mean to him.

    And it's like, she was mean for sure.

    So, what about Micah and Paul?

    Like, I couldn't figure out.

    Me neither.

    I don't really care if I hate this.

    I know.

    I kind of like Micah.

    I think I like Micah too.

    I hated her at the beginning with the whole Irena thing.

    Me too.

    But I also like Paul, by the way.

    I don't really take a side.

    I think it's fair for like Paul to not have wanted to marry her because she didn't have certain qualities that he was looking for.

    And he didn't have to say that to her because it would have been mean.

    I know.

    I think it's fine.

    Yeah, but then if he wasn't going to say to her in person that he shouldn't say it at the reunion.

    Well, Vanessa, like, literally, was forcing him.

    She was.

    What are your thoughts?

    There's this petition going around.

    It has like 30,000 signatures now about, like, people are hating Nick and Vanessa.

    So Nick needs to just, Nick, you're gone.

    Like, Vanessa was in control the whole time.

    And she has been for four seasons straight.

    Yeah.

    So just like, like, he is offering nothing.

    No, he brings absolutely nothing to the table.

    I'm Nick Lachey, obviously.

    Remember season one when he said that?

    Yep.

    Dude, you don't even say three words.

    Right.

    Vanessa.

    Okay, first of of all, stop giving her teleprompter with cheesy ass lines.

    Having been in a hosting position where there's a script half the time, painful.

    It can kill your soul.

    I don't think that that's her fault necessarily, but she's not like funny.

    And when she tries to be funny, it makes her not likable.

    And she laughs at her own jokes and nobody else does.

    Oh my God, I do that.

    No, I do that too, but like we're funny.

    You know?

    But I liked like two-thirds in because Tay was watching the plane and she was texting me like, this is painful.

    And I was like, it was.

    Just get through the first third and then the second, like two thirds in, like, it's going to be great.

    Yeah.

    Vanessa was asking really good questions.

    Was she biased?

    Yeah, but like, fuck it.

    She, she's a fan.

    She's also a part of the show.

    Like, she has opinions.

    I liked her own questions when she was not on teleprompter.

    Okay, that's fair.

    Yeah.

    I thought like the reunion was really terrible, but not because of Vanessa, because

    it was live.

    Yes.

    So these people who are just

    beyond average were not edited.

    And like, my God, were they long-winded, Marshall and Zach?

    like they were just they're average people and that's what makes a show great but that's why they need to be edited they're not you know brilliant thinkers why did netflix think to go live just like they're just trying to do a new thing live like they had the live chris rock special which was actually pretty great yeah um they're they're coming for cable like they're literally jackie was saying it's so smart they're reverting back to cable that's psychotic now they're live they ruined cable they ruined cable but they're streaming and now they want to go back to cable right because they don't even drop full seasons anymore they drop two episodes two episodes two episodes right they're literally reverting back to their...

    No.

    Yeah, it's annoying.

    They can't do this.

    No, it's terrible.

    Okay.

    So who is like your favorite couple from Love is Blind ever?

    I mean, everyone says like

    Cameron and Lauren, and I agree, but Alexa and Brendan from last season, who Chloe posted with, like I'm obsessed with.

    Cowboy and Israeli.

    I am.

    They're my favorite.

    I exactly.

    She is such a vibe.

    She was so cool.

    And I just love that she was like so unapologetically herself.

    Yep.

    She's like, yeah, I'm really bougie.

    Like, this is how I am.

    Like, we're going to have to live like this.

    And Brendan just like, Brendan was like a character out of a book like he was like okay whatever you want like what like he'll he'll just get a ton i'm obsessed her confidence like she is my role model i love her agreed i love her agreed um all right a little katy perry news katy perry has been acting like an absolute animal on american idol and like it doesn't go unnoticed she's been like making contestants cry

    and katy perry was booed this week on american idol because she criticized a contestant's outfit So a top 26 contestant named Nutsa was performing a Grace Potter song in a sparkly silver dress.

    And Katy Perry, who judges the competition show, told her that she needed to lay off of her signature glittery look.

    She said, nutsa, every time you take the stage, it's like you glitter bomb the stage.

    Listen, one thing I would like to see from you is not one piece of glitter the next time on stage.

    I know that's going to be hard for you.

    Once the crowd at Disney's resort in Hawaii let out loud booze, Lionel Ritchie and Luke Bryan, the other hosts, stood up and they were shocked at the audience reaction.

    They were like, oh my God, Katie got booed.

    It's the first time in six seasons.

    Katie then responded, what I'm saying is I'd like to see you flip the script.

    I think we want to be pulled in by our hearts too.

    I'd love to see that and America might too.

    It just feels like Katie Perry, like this girl did a good job, and I haven't seen the performance, feels like the girl did a good job and Katie like needed to critique her on something.

    And so it was like, you need a new outfit, which is just like a low blow.

    Is she trying to be Simon Cowell?

    It's giving Simon Cowell energy.

    Well, you know, like the last thing she was criticized for, there was a contestant who, I think she had like, I think she had a lot of kids or something.

    And Katie mentioned something about her, you know, spending a lot of time on her back.

    Like it was really kind of crazy.

    She's been saying some out-of-pocket shit.

    So here's the T on KT.

    Tell us.

    I interviewed her at Sirius years ago when she was like just starting, but big, big, big, big.

    And she had such a toot on her.

    Really?

    And she came in and it was for Cosmo Radio.

    And so my co-host was a man.

    And she was like, what's this penis doing in here?

    Oh, God.

    And I think she thought she was being funny, but she was being rude.

    Yeah.

    And then she was like...

    She came for me.

    I cannot remember what it was, but she was like, she was just be, oh, she was making fun of my voice, the quality of my voice, but like not in like in a fun way.

    Like Nelly Furtado was like, I like the girl with the crazy voice.

    Yeah, yeah.

    But like it katie was like how many poke how many packs of cigarettes do you smoke a day and at the time how many packs of cigarettes three and a half

    three and a half and so but like she was just very like abrasive is the only word i can use and i don't think she meant to be malicious but she just like sucked yeah and she left and we were like oh never again so i feel like she has that energy she's kind of like a nerdy show off where she like thinks she's being funny but she's actually being mean precisely and i think actually i can understand that because i feel like a lot of my comedy is like i poke fun at people and i poke fun at myself yes but you have have to know like when you've crossed the line and when she's in like such a position of power in these American Idol things where it's like you criticizing a young girl's outfit when you're probably like one of these young girls role models.

    Truly.

    And whatever she was trying to say, maybe it's like this girl does the same thing every week.

    Maybe you could say it without just being so explicit.

    Like maybe next week I'd love to see you more stripped down, you know, like in a simple outfit with a simple song and we could just focus.

    Like there's a way to say whatever she was trying to say.

    But it sounds like she just wanted to have like something original and creative to say and she ended up going for the girl's outfit.

    Well also like the voice, which is their number one competition, I presume, they're nice yeah the voice is so good and i like it i think we used to live in a time where like being an asshole was actually like encouraged i mean i was encouraged to be one i felt it's serious but now and like you actually have inspired me to be like a way softer and nicer

    and more of a fangirl because like being a fan is cool yeah it used to be cool to like be too be too cool exactly yeah so maybe katy perry is like living in the past katy perry's definitely having some sort of identity crisis i think we feel like i feel like she has been like since birth but she also went through like a really rough time with the pixie cut and she's definitely, she's back.

    Blame the haircut.

    I blame the haircut.

    I think everyone does now.

    Everyone, when Anne Hathaway went through her like terrible period, she had a pixie cut.

    Wow.

    I never realized.

    There is a correlation between like being universally disliked and having a pixie cut.

    And you cannot convince me otherwise.

    Ready for our fifth and final story?

    Yes, I am.

    It's a little book news.

    Taylor, are you a reader?

    No, right?

    What do you think?

    No.

    No.

    Why not?

    I can't read good.

    Okay.

    Well, I guess you won't be reading this.

    Serena Williams is allegedly writing a memoir post-retirement.

    Yeah, I won't.

    The retired tennis great is shopping a memoir.

    Sources tell page six that she could be offered a hit beyond $10 million, like an advance.

    Jeez.

    A publishing insider said that the book world is buzzing that Serena is selling a memoir via power agent Suzanne Gluck at WME.

    And they speculate that there is about an eight-figure deal on the table.

    A second source shares that a deal may have already closed and that Williams' team was initially looking at offers for multiple books.

    Reps for Serena Serena Williams did not get back to them.

    She has previously published a book in 2009 called My Life, Queen of the Court.

    She wrote that with a ghostwriter.

    Since the book came out, she's hit numerous new professional highs.

    Like she married Alexis Ohanian.

    She became a mom and she battled health issues.

    So on Monday, Williams launched a multimedia production company called 926 Productions, which reportedly already has a first-look TV deal.

    So she created a production studio that will then adapt her own book into

    TV series for Amazon Studios.

    She's a very smart businesswoman.

    Now that I'm into.

    I love Serena Williams.

    I would totally read her book.

    I will read excerpts when it is written about.

    You will read the articles on page six that give you the

    highlights.

    But I love her.

    Another one I interviewed at Sirius, and so wonderful.

    Really?

    Then wonderful.

    I just met her once and got a photo with her.

    And it's so sad because I've told this story before.

    It's the probably on...

    in the history of photos I've ever taken, the ugliest photo I've ever seen.

    Oh, that's the worst.

    It's really, really bad.

    That's the worst.

    I'll show it to you later.

    And I've spoken about it on the toes and people want to see what I'm doing.

    Have you never shared?

    I posted it with an emoji over my face.

    Like, I can't.

    Come on.

    No, Taylor.

    You can do it.

    No, I can.

    It is.

    How bad can it be?

    I'll show you and then you'll understand.

    Okay, fine.

    I'll show you after the show.

    Having said that, she was a doll and I love her.

    And I wrote my, everyone is like, Claudia, we've heard the story.

    I'm being you.

    Like, I'm saying the story at that point.

    I wrote my college dissertation on Serena Williams.

    So like I know everything about her and I really love her.

    Like she's, so I'm really excited for this book.

    The movie that came out, Will Smith, I'm blanking

    King Richard.

    King Richard.

    It was the, I literally, I've never said this before.

    I was watching with Tay and I was like, I hope this movie never ends.

    I just want to keep watching it because like I love the girls and I love their relationship with their dad.

    I, if I was going to read a book, this would be the one.

    Got it.

    Very interesting.

    And I love a celebrity memoir.

    People go so deep.

    And I feel like Serena is.

    probably like in an she's in a very elite level of celebrity she's very i wouldn't even say a-list she's above that because she's like with the obamas you know she's like a very upper echelon and she's notoriously private and i feel like she runs in fab i mean her wedding was like crazy star studded yeah megan markle beyonce so i feel like we'll get a lot of good stuff in this book because otherwise why would she write a book right and then there's also just so much about her coming up venus and her dad and you know competition stuff that's beyond interesting but now she's like for the last several years she has been launched into a category of celebrity i wouldn't even know what to call it she's in the she's like a in another stratosphere and i'm also excited for the series because you know if you can't read you can watch if you can't read those who can't read watch yes put it on my gravestone um i think that this is my dream is to people say to me like write a book about your life and i don't i mean considering i don't read i have why would i want to write a book right but I'd write it if I could then turn it into some sort of like series.

    Well, you know what?

    I was writing a book and only then got like, I started to get into reading once I started to write.

    That makes sense.

    I was very anti-reading.

    Jackie used to come on here and be like, I read this, I read that.

    I'm like, shut the fuck up.

    Nobody cares.

    No way.

    Yeah.

    And then I was like, I really wanted to write a book.

    And I'm like, well, I don't really feel like I can write a book if I don't read.

    Right.

    And I've always been into celebrity memoirs.

    So I used to read a bunch of celebrity memoirs, but I wasn't just a big reader at all.

    And I fell in love with reading.

    Like, it's my favorite.

    I'll read now before I watch TV.

    You know, I used to read.

    Maybe I'll get back into it.

    My life's missing it because Jackie convinced me.

    She was like, you have to.

    And I was like, no, no, no, no, no.

    And it has changed my life because A, it's just time time spent off your phone which is like just so bad for your anxiety i know and at night it's good if you want to fall asleep yes and it has really changed my life and so i'm always trying to convince other people like i got a into reading he's obsessed now and he's in my book club like uh i'm trying to get remy to read because i know remy has like a lot of anxiety from like her phone and social media She bought a Kindle and she hasn't made any progress yet.

    But I feel like reading and also being on tour, there's so many hours on planes, trans, automobiles.

    So true.

    Just sitting in dressing rooms.

    On tour, I read 50 books.

    Okay.

    Last year, when I was on tour, I read 60 books.

    What should I start with?

    Oh, okay.

    Well, tell me what our interests are.

    What are you looking for?

    The last like books I remember reading.

    Oh, guys, Taylor has to read The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo.

    That will be the book that will get you into.

    Is it like, I like thriller vibes?

    I don't want to spoil a single thing for you, but just want to like.

    I like sexiness.

    Will you trust me that you will love this book?

    I will trust you.

    You guys, write in the comments and tell Taylor, knowing what you know about Taylor, how much.

    And by the way, it's a lesbian book.

    No, no, no, no.

    Say it one more time.

    No.

    It is a book.

    It is glamorous.

    It is old Hollywood.

    You will

    be old.

    No.

    No.

    Trust me.

    Trust me.

    Like Marilyn Monroe?

    No.

    You will be sobbing by the end of this book.

    No,

    Taylor, you guys, will you leave a comment and don't spoil it?

    Just be like, Taylor, trust Claudia on this.

    You will love this book.

    If you've read the book, it has also been adapted for a film.

    Okay.

    So when it comes out, you could be like, I read the book.

    Okay, I I love that moment.

    Moral high ground.

    I will say this.

    The last book I ever read genuinely

    front to end was this book called Everyone Worth Knowing.

    It's by the same author who wrote Devil Wars Prada.

    Oh, I've read a bunch of her books.

    And I love her.

    But it's like about a PR girl who like goes to live in a pizza.

    Yeah, no, it's trash and I loved it.

    Okay, so I read When Life Gives You Lululemon

    by that same author.

    I just made a noise.

    Jackie was like, just get past the title because it was so cringe.

    And it's about like these rich women who wear Lululemon in Connecticut.

    Love.

    It was amazing.

    And she like married a senator who leaves her.

    It's so good.

    I love her.

    I'm telling you, you will like reading.

    I know, I know.

    Okay.

    You've convinced me.

    I'm going to get you a copy of this book.

    Just try.

    Ben and I are in a club together, Women Against Literacy.

    Yep.

    But Ben actually, during Yom Kippur, when we couldn't like read or any, when we couldn't watch TV or be on our phones, he picked up a book and he loved it, but he just never finished it.

    But he loved the book.

    He gets it.

    He just like like is too busy.

    Okay.

    I'm going to get you a copy of the book.

    Okay.

    I'm in.

    Guys, leave a comment telling Taylor she will love this book.

    Please.

    And that's our show.

    Hi.

    Thank you for being here.

    I love you.

    I love you.

    You know, I'm always available.

    Guys, Taylor hosts, she has a weekly podcast called Taste of Taylor.

    So if you love the smoker's coffin, you can't get enough of it.

    It's a free podcast called Taste of Taylor.

    I'm on it a bunch.

    Brian's on it.

    Stasi's on it.

    She does great guests.

    She does pop culture.

    And she also does a daily show, just like The Toast.

    She does an hour a day.

    It's a Patreon show.

    So So it's $6.95 every month for an episode every single day.

    Every single day.

    You have different co-hosts.

    Your wife comes on.

    Yep.

    It's really fabulous.

    I'm actually a Patreon member myself.

    I listen to some episodes because I like a lot of your co-hosts.

    Thank you.

    I love Andrea Lopez.

    I know.

    I know.

    I told her she's so excited.

    So it's patreon.com slash the Taylor Streker Show.

    So the free podcast is called Taste of Taylor.

    And then the Patreon show is called The Taylor Streker Show.

    If you're looking for someone to listen to after the toast every day, because you can't get enough.

    I love it.

    I love you guys.

    Thank you so much for listening to The Toast.

    We are, oh, Margo's joining me tomorrow.

    Jackie's out again.

    So, Margo's with me tomorrow.

    And the people love Margo.

    Her episode outperformed everyone.

    Margo is a vibe.

    She's a star.

    She really is.

    And she knows it too.

    Thank you guys so much for listening to the Toast of the Millennium Morning Show.

    Don't forget to get your merch at toastmerch.com.

    We hope you guys have a great day.

    Thanks for listening.

    If you're listening to this podcast, podcasts available every listening to Spotify, Tune, Stitcher, Poger, I recast post-listen podcast, my toast of user, everybody's starting a wickedly talented.

    We are.

    Have a great Thursday, and we'll see you tomorrow.

    It's almost Friday.

    Love you guys.

    Bye.