Theo's Eye and Ben's Flashlight: Tuesday, March 21st, 2023

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Good morning, Millennials.

Welcome back to the toast.

Happy Tuesday.

Hope everyone's having a great day.

I'm not

Jax.

Well, you can't just leave us with that.

Claudia, what's wrong?

You don't even want to know.

I can't even say it.

Theo?

Well, I don't even get me started on Theo.

Is there something else?

There is.

What?

We literally had this conversation one week ago on the toast about partners and spouses who are just people, human beings who don't respect sleep.

What Ben woke you up when he was leaving for his trip?

Ben woke me up when he was leaving for his trip this morning at 4.30

and I have been up since then.

Why didn't you fall back asleep?

I couldn't.

Like, first of all, what fucking nerve?

I just want to say, no, now I'm getting, now I'm reliving it.

I'm getting angry.

What fucking nerve?

Whenever I either come home late and Ben's already asleep or have to leave early, I literally turn on the light in the bathroom and I get annihilated for it.

Like absolutely fucking annihilated.

You know what Ben does this morning?

What?

He's walking around the room with a flashlight, like from his phone.

And he wanted to check in on Theo's eyes.

So for those who don't know, I spent the night last night at the pet emergency room.

Theo is having some fecocta situation.

He's got like a one-eyed mulligan.

One of them won't open.

The doctors don't think it's, you know, severe or urgent.

It looks like a mild abrasion.

He's on antibiotics.

So drama queen.

Heart's going out to do.

Yeah, hearts up for do.

Prayers up for due.

Prayers up for do.

I was thinking about do all night.

Brew and I were on pins and needles waiting for results.

Ben's running around the room with his dumbass motherfucking flashlight.

And then he comes to the bed with his big flashlight.

to like take a look at Theo's eye.

And by big flashlight, you mean the light on his phone.

It's a big flashlight.

For sure, but it's not like, you know, the one.

It might as well be.

It might as well be like a cop's flashlight.

Okay.

And Theo's laying with me and Ben's flashing around his big dumbass light

and flashing it in my goddamn eye.

So I'm like, oh,

I'm like, oh, wow, okay.

A light in my eye.

And then he left.

And I'm like, God, I guess I'm going back to sleep.

I know it's 4.30.

And that was it for me.

And I just, I'm, I have like anger coursing through my veins for the fucking lunacy, the lack of consideration, and the brain-dead nature of the flashlight usage.

I'm like mad.

I'm fucking mad because I'm tired.

I woke up at 4 fucking 30.

I'm sorry, Turdy, that that's what you're going through.

I'm really pissed.

You know, he thought he was being considerate, though, because he's like skulking around in the dark with his flashlight.

Why does he need to check on Theo's eye?

I'll be up in a few hours.

Because he's worried about his boy.

No, because he's a drama queen.

And he's like, you know, I'm going to have to take care of Theo this whole week because Ben is gone.

And he just wants to pretend like he did something.

I'm mad.

And, you know, when I spoke to him this morning, he was like, I'm sorry.

I'm like, it's okay.

But you know what?

Like now, sitting here, like the whole day is ahead of me and I feel like I've already done a whole day.

I'm fucking mad.

I'm really, I'm like, I'm pissed.

What did you do from 4.30 on?

Such a good question.

I laid, I made a bowl of cereal, I watched Sex in the City, then I watched Daisy Jones and the Six,

then I did my hair, then I gave Theo breakfast, then I took like a pretty decent amount of time doing my makeup.

I made the bed.

Oh, I cleaned the house because of course, Big fancy Ben Soffer celebrity is going on his trip.

He had to turn the house into a dump.

So me, the maid, comes.

And yeah, I just did the dishes.

I literally, like, I did everything.

Damn.

No, um,

today's not the day to fuck with me.

I guess I shouldn't tell you about my experience waking up this morning because it was.

Get out of here.

It was

like baby Harry came, was plopped on your chest and gave you a big kiss and said, oh, mommy, I love you so much.

Is that what happened?

So usually I never make it to my alarm because Harry wakes us up with his cries.

And so I don't ever experience the alarm.

I never like have the alarm wake me up.

I did get a hatch two days ago and I set my new alarm on my hatch for a little earlier than my old alarm on my phone because I would like to get up before Harry so that I could like be a person and not just like stumble out of bed and go into the toy bin, you know, like frazzled.

And this morning, every once in a while, like he sleeps through the morning till like our morning time.

And this morning, like the hatch, i got to experience how the hatch wakes you up like gradually so i technically like woke up before my alarm because like the hatch did that and then literally two minutes later harry woke up so i was like amazing i got to like get a coffee go in there and just like be human Okay, I thought you were like actually gonna have had like a sublime like that just sounds that just sounds like everything worked out in your favorite timing was right which it rarely rarely happens like he always wakes up before I thought you were gonna say oh Zach let me sleep in he took Harry and by the time I arose, Harry was all dressed and fed for the day, laying in my bed, saying, Mommy, let's go out for scones today.

Oh, I wish.

But we should go out for scones today.

Harry is so gonna grow up to be British.

He doesn't even know it.

Yeah.

You know, when you're like fucking tired?

Yeah.

Like, I could cry.

Like, I'm really.

I'm gonna send a strongly worded, really nasty text to Ben.

Pray for Ben, and also pray for me, who, you know, I'm the one who's here to receive all of this.

No, and I have such a busy fucking day.

Like, what do you have going on, Turdy Loohoo?

Well, we have Frankie Fred at five o'clock, so hopefully, you can nap.

And I can't.

Oh my god, I'm like, literally so mad.

I'm like,

what do you have to do today?

Could we maybe push anything to tomorrow?

Today, well, I just have to like take care of Theo.

And

I'm not okay.

You're crying.

I've been up since 4:30.

Yeah.

I was supposed to start my physical therapy today.

The snatcher sent me up with a physical therapist that she worked with a few years ago that she really liked.

His name is Frank.

Because I've been having really bad back problems.

So I was going to do that today.

And then I was going to, you know, that's going to take a while.

So after the toast.

And then

we have breaking bread and then I have my book club.

And now I'm just not going to enjoy any of it.

I was looking forward to my PT.

I was looking forward to my book club.

I think you should move PT so that you can take a nap and that you can enjoy Freaking Fred and Book Club.

Yeah.

I think that's the move.

I,

you know, these, these men,

they become celebrities and they think, you know, they forget all about their wives.

They treat everyone like shit.

Ben's going to Alabama today.

For a meet and greet, because he's a big celebrity.

For a meet and greet, because he's a big celebrity.

So if anybody in Alabama wants to

defend me, wants to go defend me.

If anyone in Alabama wants to get woken up and have a flashlight in their eye, go see Ben.

No, if anybody wants to take up this cause in Mobile,

go to Ben's meet and greet tonight for Spritz.

Ben's going to go to his meet and greet and it's going to be like a protest.

You guys, we should protest outside.

Yes.

Should I fly?

You should.

I'll sleep on the plane.

But let me ask you something, not to

victim blame or anything.

No, no, no, no.

I'm not victim blaming.

Why do you think that you couldn't fall back asleep?

Like for me, if like if I wake up at 4.30, I'm like, oh my God, three more hours.

Good night.

I know.

Normally me too, but like

I don't know why I didn't fall back asleep.

It was also like a gradual wake up.

Like first he got out of bed and like, you know, charged into the bathroom.

And I heard that and I said, have a safe flight.

And then I fell back asleep.

And then he's packing with the light running around the room.

I'm like, oh, you're still here.

Then the light's directly in my eye when he's flashing Theo.

So it was like, oh, he i know he woke up at 4 30 and by the time i went to go pee it was five so i feel like he was walking around for 30 minutes with the light on got it okay and that's enough time to like really shake you out of the way and then you're up and then i'm up so i just feel off i don't feel right and you know i have my period um

so that on top of the 4 30 a.m i'm i'm not one to be fucked with today i will keep that in mind can you believe like it's just gonna be turdy's way today

and that's different than every other day.

It's true.

No, sometimes I put up a fight, you know, arguing this point and that.

But

you're going to hear peep out of me today.

It's whatever Charlie thinks.

It's whatever Turdy knows.

I feel like for everyone's safety, like, it's best if I'm just, I keep to myself today.

You don't think that you need to kind of let it out?

Maybe it's best for the ratings if you don't.

Yeah, no, like.

or maybe, I mean, whatever turtle wants.

Turdy gets.

Do whatever you need to do, Turdy Lou.

I just really hope that people take up for me at Ben's Meeting Greet today.

If you're listening to this and you live in Alabama and you're going.

He is going to have a miserable time.

Just take up for me.

Say, not only was Claudia's morning ruined, but my morning was ruined too because Claudia was a nasty wench on the toast today because of you.

Yeah.

It was you.

And if you guys want to, like, you know, make signs and pick it, I wouldn't be against that either.

And what should the sign say?

Okay.

Something about how Ben doesn't support literacy or sleeping.

Or something about, you know,

no more flashlights.

Maybe that would be our chant as we stand in

unity.

Yeah.

Okay.

We look to see.

If anybody has any better ideas, drop them in the comments.

We'd love to see what would your picket site say in the comments.

Yeah.

Give some ideas to the Alabama toasters.

Let literate women sleep.

Yeah.

Because he knows, you know what?

I feel like it was intentional because tonight's my book club.

And so you think he was trying to sabotage you.

Yeah.

So that I can't enjoy my book club because I'll be so tired.

And he'll be like, well, maybe you just shouldn't do it anymore.

But you know what I found?

Like, sometimes I'm so tired and I don't want to go to something.

It's something that I know I would have enjoyed, but like, I just, I can't,

I don't want to go.

But like, once I'm there, like you really are just there and you enjoy yourself and you forget how you felt before.

100%.

Usually that happens to me.

Ben didn't fully think through this plan.

We're about 10 minutes in.

It hasn't kicked in yet for you.

No, Ben hasn't fully thought through his plan.

No, he didn't think.

I will enjoy Book Club.

He underestimated the turdy Lou.

100%.

He always does.

Always does.

I'm just worried about Theo.

More importantly, how's Theo?

Honestly, I've never taken a a trip to like the emergency room for pets.

And I didn't even know where my local one was.

So this is just a reminder to everyone to always, you know, know your resources.

I went.

Basically, after dinner last night, Ben's like, what's up with Theo's eye?

And one thing about Ben is like, he's overly cautious.

I'm like, it's fine.

It's fine.

It's fine.

And then I did take a look.

And I'm like, I don't know.

One of them was like pretty sealed shut.

And

we whisked him whisked him off to the emergency room.

It was so sad in the emergency room.

Oh my god, I'm like not going to cry, start talking.

I was crying before bed.

Like, it was so sad.

They had this candle, and there was a sign above it that said, like, if this candle is lit,

I'm going to cry.

It said, if this candle is lit, like, please keep your voices down.

Someone

is saying goodbye.

It was so depressing.

I actually, I liked going there.

It gave me perspective because Theo was fine.

And they kept pushing him to the back of the line because every time another dog was came out, it wasn't that urgent.

No, so every time another another dog came in i like really realized how like literally theo was okay my other dog it was it was so sad and like this girl was there she was by herself she was like making the emergency room was like actually really emotional she was like by herself which i just feel like is so scary she was like young and her dog like was like this

oh my god it was so scary and that's just when the doctor was finally getting to theo and the girl walked in and the doctor was like you're gonna need to hold on a minute and i was like yeah of course go um

and then when the doctor came back i was like how is that little bulldog and she was like it doesn't look good what happened to him um

i don't know like

i i did over here i was being really nosy um like the bulldog had like discs in his back you know french bulldogs have really bad back problems i remember brian used to have a french bulldog and

he actually had to start living with brian's friend in florida because he can't walk upstairs and the guy had like a house with no stairs um

so he had discs in his back and basically I heard her say like, I think she said, I know I sound crazy, I think she said fentanyl patch.

Like the dog had like this patch on his back because he was in so much pain and it just ran out and he started to, I guess the pain all came back and the dog was like,

got it.

And even when they took him back into the like

room, I still heard the panting.

It was really sad.

Oh, wow.

I know.

I hope to never take another trip back there.

It was so depressing.

So Ardu is doing well, better on the mend?

He's not.

The thing is, and why I was never really truly worried is like his spirits were high the whole time.

If Theo is ever lethargic, then I'm concerned.

But he was like wagging his tail, wanting to play with the other dogs, but you know, one of his eyes was just not working.

Yeah.

They took a look.

They said he has a mild abrasion on one of his eyes.

It shouldn't be a big deal.

An antibiotic drop slash like ointment thing will should clear it up in a week.

So we started that last night.

I did it this morning.

It's hard to get him to get, you know, those drops in his eye.

Sure.

He's a fighter.

And he doesn't need to wear an eye patch.

I feel like maybe he should.

He's wearing a cone.

And he wouldn't keep an eye patch on.

But what is a cone going to do for him?

He can't scratch his own eye.

He can't scratch.

Yeah, which could be the reason how he got the abrasion in the first place.

They love that.

Could make it, yeah, or it could just make it worse.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay.

Well, prayers up for

thinking of the French Bulldog as well.

I know.

I woke up this morning with a heavy heart, like feeling for the French Bulldog.

Well, hopefully, he gets another patch and finds relief.

But it's not a long-term solution.

No.

Did we have an age on the French Bulldog?

No, I couldn't hear.

I was like being a busy body and a half.

I just wanted to see what other people had going on.

Yeah, but also you see the dog come in and then naturally you want to know what what's going on.

Like you care.

Oh, yeah, like this guy brought his cat in.

Oh madam.

I literally knew everything that was going on.

And the cat was making like such sad sounds in the carrier.

And the guy was explaining how

the cat got caught in his box spring.

And I don't know.

He went straight to the back.

Was this like a group forum?

Like, was it just like a circle where like every...

It's a good question.

It's a good question.

Are there not cordoned off rooms where there is examinations?

So actually, the reason why I went to this place is because it's one of the few in the city that lets you stay with your dog the entire time.

So actually the non-threatening slash urgent, like Theo's appointment, so there's a reception with like the desk and chairs and stuff.

And in that room, there's an examination table.

Theo actually had his appointment in reception because they don't let you separate from your dog.

Okay.

Some of the more heavy, serious cases went to the back room.

Okay, but actually, that's why I was in reception the entire time.

Yeah, you're right.

So you see everyone splayed out.

It's kind of like

it was like kind of like a free-for-all.

It was like group therapy.

It was kind of chaotic.

And you know what?

The longer I sat there, the less concerned I got because I saw people with like real problems.

Yeah.

Perspective is everything.

Perspective.

But it was a...

But still, it was scary for Dew.

We don't minimize what Dew has gone through.

No, we don't.

And you're right.

I think I should move my physical therapy today.

Like, I think I need to be with Dew.

Yeah, and also, like...

Why does Frank need this?

Yeah, no, this is not the energy I want.

He doesn't want to meet this turdy loo.

No, Margot said Frank was like such a great guy.

He deserves better.

And he did great work, but like, I was really looking forward to getting, you know, someone to look at my back today, you know?

Yeah.

Your back will have to wait.

The Ozai takes priority.

Yeah.

Because this freaking

greater than back.

Thanks for hearing me out.

You know, as you feel better than like I did.

I feel like a lot of my anger has dissipated.

Like I still want to kill Ben, but I'm not going to take it out on the toast.

Yay.

Yay.

Crisis averted.

We made made it through to the other side.

That's what we do here at the toast.

You come in.

It's kind of like urgent care.

Like you come in with your distress, whatever it is, all of you listening.

And we're going to make it through together.

We're going to put you on the examination table and reception.

And we're going to find out what's wrong, Turkey.

And we're just going to let you split out forever on.

But we're going to fix it.

Yeah.

So I just wanted to let everyone know, like, whatever attitude you get from me today, like, every day.

Oh, my God.

It's like every day you have your excuse lined up for like for the attitude.

No, I, Jackie, it's not fucking excuse, bitch.

It's called context.

Sorry.

Yeah, you have your explainers.

It's just important that everybody knows, like, I'm a human.

You're a human.

We're going through things.

And personally, I'm dealing with a rough 12 hours.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And like, that's what the show is about, sharing our experiences and

for good and bad.

Thank you.

It's not always going to be, you know, coming back from Portugal.

It's not always going to be Diamonds and Rose, but it should be.

It should be, but it's not.

It's not.

She was so right about that, Lisa.

Yeah.

It's pretty obvious, but yeah.

Wow.

Facts.

That's fair.

I think we should get into the stories because weirdly, it's popping off on a Tuesday.

Jackie had six.

She had to whittle it down.

She was

eight.

But then Claudia really wanted to talk about one story, so I had to.

Yes.

I had to whittle it down to four.

I'm so excited to read Someone to Filth today, especially given my mood.

Oof.

And hopefully tomorrow's a slow day.

So then some of my others that weren't even really that B-list could make it to the stories.

Like I'm feeling good.

I've got stories for days.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't notice because it was like in my own like situation.

You were looking so pregnant.

Yeah, well, I am pretty pregnant.

And then also you show sooner, faster, bigger, like when you're not in your first pregnancy.

Did you know that?

Oh, is that true?

No.

Yes, very true.

Like.

It's what they say and it also is what I do.

Filled your belly.

Like, let me see.

Yeah,

I was about to post a video to my Instagram because I like, I like when I do like a mirror picture and then like I turn to the side and it's like, belly.

Boom.

Yeah, so because yesterday on the show, like I loved my sweatsuit, but like it looked like absolute fucking garbage in the reels.

And so I was like, maybe it was just too big.

So now I'm trying the opposite of wearing something like svelt to see if I look smaller because I looked like a big fat fuck.

Listen, we said this was not the year of negative self-talk and we're certainly not calling ourselves big fat fucks when we're pregnant.

No, I know.

But the thing is, I'm not, the thing is, I actually am not like blaming myself for that.

Like, I think it was the sweatsuit and the chair and the camera angle.

Like, they were not a mix.

It's really not me because I don't know if I told you guys this.

Turdy Lou knows, but like, I went to the doctor for my, like, you go once a month.

And in the last month of pregnancy, I only gained one pound.

And do you think that one pound like was the baby?

No, because the baby's not even the pound yet.

But it's just like, it's so easy to just put on weight when you're pregnant because it's like, fuck it.

Right.

Right.

But you also like need to put on weight that's outside of the baby, like the placenta weighs and this and that.

And also like, you got to live your life.

But one pound in a month, like, I'm like,

healthy queen.

Great, baby.

So I'm really not even feeling like

super big outside of pregnancy, but like the sweatsuit just like wasn't helping me yesterday.

So I thought I would try something different, like

skin tight.

You look fab.

How many months are you?

I can never keep up.

I'm in my fourth month.

Fourth month, okay.

Yeah.

People keep asking me, like, what does Jackie do?

I don't know.

That's probably for the best.

Like, I don't need everyone to know my business.

No, it's so true.

That's like a kind of a kind of a blessing of having like a sister with

a big mouth, but it's also forgetful.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So true.

So true.

Well, you look great.

Thank you so much.

Hopefully, I'll see when we wrap if this was the right move or if I should just go back to wearing leggings in the bar sweatshirt.

Like if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

That's me today.

Leggings and a sweatshirt.

If it ain't broke, don't fucking fix it, but yeah, but sometimes like those reels, like I like how I look on the YouTube and then in the reels, I'm like, who is that?

Not me.

This is not my plate.

This is not my plate.

This is not.

I know you don't feel that way because you're just having like the opposite life experience right now, where every day you're just like smaller than you even thought.

But you know, but we have something for everyone here.

Yeah, yeah, and we always will.

Hopefully.

So now, without further ado, to do to do, here are the fast eye stories that you need to know.

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They're the best sheets to sleep on.

Asterisk.

Footnote.

When somebody will let you sleep.

First story.

I just

think it's kismet how our sponsors today were literally for Ben and for bed.

Yeah.

And what does that say?

Don't you find it weird how there's only one letter difference between Ben and Bed?

I do find that strange.

And it's like just one thing went awry.

Actually, really two things.

Ben and bed.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But it's like you can't connect maybe because that letter change.

Yeah.

I just, I find it interesting that the

that it's that it's in it's in the it's in the ads, you know, like even the ads know.

Yes, but I think we'll be able to make any ad applicable to this situation.

Yeah, because like when when you're so mad, like it takes over your whole being.

Every your whole vision is clouded.

You see everything through the lens of...

It's like if we have state farm, it's like you need insurance because you're going to kill your husband.

No, because I'm going to burn down this house.

Yeah.

I don't think insurance covers arson if it's like your house, but yeah.

Or murder, but yeah.

Like, what else do we have today?

Do you know?

I do.

Well, actually, I know you're excited because you've been dying to talk about fastgrowingtrees.com because you got a new tree in your backyard.

I did.

And you know what?

Ben is going to need some of my fast-growing trees when he's out on the street saying he's an orange.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And we also have skylight frames, which I will be changing the photo on

my table from a photo of me and Ben to a photo of me and Theo.

Yeah.

So really

they're all applicable.

I am excited to talk about fast growing trees.

Jackie's been like, non-stop talking about this new tree in her backyard.

That I got from fast growing trees.

It's an orange tree.

And then it inspired me to like find a place for it.

And the place that I found for it is actually the perfect place to start a little garden.

It's not the time.

No, but okay, but can I talk about that?

I'm going to start a garden.

Yeah, but why don't you save it for when we talk about fast-growing trees?

It's like,

by the way, teaser alert.

Spoiler alert.

Pretend you didn't hear that.

Yeah.

Our first story.

Amanda Bynes has been placed on psychiatric hold after roaming the streets of Los Angeles naked.

Amanda Bynes has been placed on a psychiatric hold.

TMZ has learned after she was found roaming the streets naked and alone.

An eyewitness told TMZ Amanda was seen walking near downtown LA early Sunday morning without any clothes.

We're told Amanda waved a car down, telling the driver she was coming down from a psychotic episode.

Amanda herself then called 911.

The law enforcement sources say Amanda was taken to a nearby police station where a mental health team determined she needed to be placed on a 5150 psych hold.

Fortunately, our sources say it doesn't appear Amanda was hurt at all during the ordeal, though things could have been much worse given the area where she was found.

A source close to Amanda tells TMZ she's currently hospitalized and will likely continue to receive care for several days.

Typically, a psychiatric hold only lasts 72 hours, but it can be extended.

Also, her parents have said that they are not looking into doing another conservatorship after this

incident.

Well, I have to say, like, to have the

wherewithal to like understand, like, as you're coming down, to ask for help and call 911, like, is something, it's like a, that's a huge deal.

Um, I just, whenever I talk about Amanda Mines, like I get really sad.

Yeah.

I feel like

something happened to her.

Um,

and I don't think we'll really ever know what it is, but she's such a talent.

And I think so many people, like us included, feel like they grew up with her.

And every time we report on like a, you know,

when she takes a step back in her, in her journey, it makes me really sad.

It does make me really sad.

And I also like, I have to commend the driver that would pull over for a naked woman flagging the car down.

I feel like most people wouldn't.

Like it surprises me that someone stopped for her and helped her because if you see like a person walking around naked

LLA, you're like, you know, crazy.

Trying to get out of the way.

Yeah.

So maybe someone recognized her.

Maybe, but she's kind of unrecognizable these days.

Like she looks just different from how we remember her.

Like she has black hair and then blonde.

So I'm glad that she was able to get help from a good Samaritan before, like this article says, like things could have gotten so much worse considering the area that she was in.

It's like highly trafficked.

She's naked.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And vulnerable.

It's just really scary.

No, I know.

And I'm, I'm just curious, like, who does she have around her i know she she kind of has her parents right i think she has a boyfriend paul

yeah but they were like broken up

i think she has her parents too um

i'm

the thing is conservatorships have gotten such a bad rap rap that it's like you never want to be someone to advocate for conservatorship i also don't know her story i also don't know really anything about conservatorships only like britney and how horrible that was but they're i'm sure they are intended to do good.

Yeah.

And I don't know that this situation means that she should be under conservatorship.

I don't know what any of it means,

but they clearly have a lot on their hands.

Yeah.

I think for the most part, conservatorships are meant to be, you know, positive and protect the person for a temporary amount of time.

Obviously, we all have like a bad connotation now because of Britney, but I think for the most part, like they do a lot of good.

Like Tom Girardi's in a conservatorship right now.

Yeah, but he's another just negative example.

Well, of a, of a, of a situation.

And you could say, like, there is the argument that he's actually not as unwell as he pretends to be.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

In order to not, so

another.

I'm sure there are good examples of conservatorship.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Um, I just feel sad for Amanda Bynes.

Like, I, I feel like whenever we talk about her and she, and she makes strides, we're always saying like, we want her back in the game doing movies.

But I think, you know, that's pretty much out of the realm of possibility.

Yeah, she had been working.

She had been going to college for fashion design, and it seemed like she was making progress and doing well in that arena.

I don't think we'll ever have her acting, doing comedy again.

I don't think that maybe she should, because, like you said, clearly something happened.

I imagine it was in the Hollywood toxic sphere.

Of course.

And it's best to stay out of it.

Yeah.

I just really, I really wish her well.

Me too.

Me too.

I hope she gets the help that she needs.

Are you ready for our next story?

Yes.

Which is some incredibly happy, heartwarming news that I think Turdy Lou needs on this Tuesday.

Luke Combs and his wife, Nicole, are expecting their second baby.

They are joining the two under two club.

So country singer on our fave, Luke Combs and his wife, Nicole Hawking Combs, are expecting their second child.

They announced last night with the cutest announcement ever.

So it was a collage of photos of them and their baby Tex.

And

overlaid was one of Luke's new songs.

And Tex was wearing a shirt that said Big Brother.

Right.

And the song is called Take You With Me.

And the lyrics that we got were just all about how he wants to take his son like everywhere with him.

And even if he like can't understand it yet, like what he's doing and where he's going.

Like he just wants him to be everywhere with him.

I literally like facts, straight facts.

So I love love the song.

I love the announcement.

I'm so happy for them that they're having another one.

I know, that was a surprise.

How old is Tex?

When was Tex born?

He's not one yet.

I think he was born in May, I think.

Let's get some candles burning, some records turning.

All the lights down to

taking nine cents.

He must have played that song and said, Nico, get over here.

Yeah, first comes the kind of love we make, then comes take you with me.

So, well, actually, if we're going to do that, it goes all the way back.

Beautiful, crazy.

No, no, no, no.

He said, which songs are connected?

Forever After All, Better Together, Your First and My Last Name.

Oh, yeah, no, no, but we're just talking about the lovemaking.

Yeah, but you got to get married.

First comes love,

then

Forever After All, Better Together.

Better love me.

Love we make, kind of love we make, then this this new one.

Comes, take you with me in the baby carriage.

So cute.

You know, and I think we said this last time when they were naming their first son, how like there's a lot of pressure on them to kind of like be and come up with the most like original contra name.

And they really killed it with text.

So hard to do it again.

No, you guys, naming the second is even harder than naming a first because for your first, you really have names that you've always loved.

And so for the second, if you don't have more names that you loved or like you ran out, like for the second, it's like names that you've seen all throughout your life that you never once thought like, I would like to name my child this.

And now all of a sudden you have to look at that name and be like, that's my child.

And you have to take another look and say, there might be something there that wasn't there before.

It's so true.

Claudia sent me this account last week.

No, I was just going to bring that up.

Oh, no, you didn't send me, you sent me something else.

But, oh, I saw Megan McCain posted an image from this account called Name Berry, where she gives like a category and then like really specific name options or like if you like this name but it's become really popular try this name.

Yeah, that's the same thing as what I sent you.

Yes, yes.

But it was more, it was in graphics like Canva.

It was much more digestible.

No, I love this girl on TikTok.

I just randomly, I don't know why I got targeted one of her videos, but she's a baby name consultant

and she seemed really smart.

Like she had a lot of knowledge of like Bible and history and like phonetics and linguistic.

And so she's doing a series.

It's called Not This But That.

Like, do you love a name, but you can't use it because your friend had it or your cousin?

Comment a name.

And she does a series where, like, once a week or maybe a couple of times a week, she'll choose someone who was like, I wanted to name my daughter Madison, but you know, my best friend did that.

What can I do instead?

And she'll come up with a name.

And I can't really explain, like, here, this morning she did for somebody, you can't use the word, the name Sloan, S-L-O-A-N.

Try

Reese.

And like, I can't explain why, but like, there's the same vibe.

It's the same vibe.

Yeah.

Like, okay, you want to use um

wait.

Like, she actually, and I can't, I don't know what's like the

science behind why it makes sense.

Okay, here.

Because I thought this wasn't was really good.

She said, if you can't do

wrong one, just give me one second.

And then, you know what, I'll show you some of these nameberry ones.

It's such a cute idea for content, by the way.

Like, I feel like moms like would love it.

It is.

I went so deep.

I thought this was so good because I've always, I really like the name Piper.

But let's say you can't use the name Piper.

Go for Daphne.

Like, that makes sense.

Yeah.

Yeah.

By the way, her name is, her TikTok name is Naming Bebe, if anyone cares.

Naming Bebe.

Okay.

Let me find

naming names.

Just some of these.

It's so hard.

Claudia, it's so hard.

Do you have like names that you're ready to name?

Like kind of.

But like no.

You know,

the good thing about, you know, waiting a little longer than your siblings to have children is like, you know, you get to live.

But the bad thing is all like the good family names get taken.

Like Harold, like Michael, Michaela.

You know.

That that part definitely sucks.

So if anything is like getting me to start wanting to have kids, it's like to snatch one of the remaining names names before like the two older siblings have it all and Margaret and I are out here with like, you know, Sloane, David, and Daphne.

Yeah.

What were you looking for?

I was looking for the list of names that it was like if you like this

it was or it was like themes if you want like floral names It was like really pretty floral names that aren't just like the obvious ones.

Oh, and that was the other thing that I like that that TikTok account does.

She takes into consideration names that have currently cracked like the top 20 and she won't recommend them.

Yeah, no, but it will be like, if you liked this, but it's try this, like, because there are names right now that are so popular.

I was looking at like most popular boy names by state, and it's like, you just can't.

The most popular name is, it is number one, but it's also like literally number one in every state for girls is Olivia.

Oh, so jealous.

I know.

It's a gorgeous name.

It's a gorgeous name.

Do you like your name?

I do, but I also like it because I'm Jackie O.

And you feel like a Jackie?

Well, no, because jackie i like the name jackie but i feel like special because i'm jackie oh if i didn't okay but i'm not saying jackie o i'm saying jackie

like to me you are such a jackie like jackie is you and you are jackie and i think it's very like emblematic of you

thanks

but there's also like so many jackies weirdly i've like not been not really

close with jackies throughout my life but like

there's just like jackies out there there are Jackies out there, but they're not on every corner.

They're not on every corner, and there's certainly not a lot of turdy loos on every corner.

Well, let me tell you how, like, I've literally never met another human being named Claudia.

Maybe every now and then there'll be like a Claudia in the book, but she's never the main character, she's always like the irrelevant ugly on the side.

And I like low-key, I'm not crazy about my name.

You're wrong for that.

Really?

Yeah, it's so beautiful.

I feel like out of all the sisters, we all have really beautiful names.

And also, you must remember that my real name is Jacqueline, so more, a little more beautiful than Jackie for sure.

But like, that's literally not your name.

Like, I don't know, but it's like when you when you put it with the rest of like our names, it just like it presents nicer.

We all have really pretty names, but mine is probably the most common, even though it's not even like Rachel.

Well,

I don't know, you just said Olivia's top 10,

yeah.

Now, but Olivia's a million years old

when she was named it, like it wasn't common, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not us like finding a way to to make an eco homes is like baby announcement about us.

Yeah.

Do you have any like my names?

I love your name.

Maybe they love all my sister's names.

Another like state vibe, you know, because Tex.

Yeah.

Like maybe not a state, but like a city.

Austin.

Yeah.

I'm assuming it's a boy.

Did she say if it's a boy?

It's a boy.

Oh, cute.

Phoenix Baron Room.

Right.

Like something in terms of like land, you know?

Yeah.

Like there's

some fun names like that.

Yeah, they'll come up with something good.

You know, they love a little.

I can't speak today.

I'm sorry.

So you're just going to leave the sentence.

Redneck imagery.

That's what Luke Combs said to us when we interviewed him on the red carpet, that his music is redneck imagery.

It is.

And speaking of his music, the song, Take Me With You, comes out on Friday.

So prepare for tears on Friday.

I need to prepare.

Like, it's enough.

I need this album.

Five of Leaf Clover, so good.

Joe, so good.

Love you anyway, so good.

Like I'm ready for the album, sir.

I'm ready for the album, but really my music cup has runneth over right now.

Like I have so many albums that I'm listening to and

sometimes there's such a dearth

that I just kind of like want to wait.

When does the album come out?

It's an amazing question.

I want to say the end of the month.

I'm really not ready.

I'm ready, Lou.

And I'm still listening to growing up all the time.

Yeah.

Like that's in my rotation.

Growing up, Amelia, New Morgan Wallen, rolling up the welcome mat.

Like it's too much.

It's too much.

It's too much.

It's like, then there are so many times when I've gotten nothing.

No, because the summer is coming up, like low-key.

It's sneaking up on us.

And we need songs for the summer.

So that's what's coming out in the next couple of weeks.

Okay, Turdy Louhoo.

Okay, Turdy Lou.

I won't argue with you.

Are you ready for our next story?

That was a Turdy Lou original story.

Yes.

And everyone should really pray for this woman because of the form that Turdy Lou is in.

Yeah.

Plus, you know, even on a kinder day, she's not taking kindly to this story.

Yeah, read it.

Anna Marie Tendler, who

is also very well known as John Mulaney's ex-wife.

The woman John Mulaney left Olivia Munn for.

So we give her, I give her a little bit of grace because she's been through a lot.

She reacts to backlash after accusing Taylor Swift of copying her art.

So, Anna Marie Tenler claimed she was only kidding when she accused Taylor Swift of copying her art on the singer's era's tour.

The artist said in a TikTok video, she said that the stage setup during Swift's song Tolerate It looked, quote, strikingly like one of her photographs in tone and in aesthetics.

In the now-deleted upload, she showed the decorations, which featured a dining table and candles, followed by her own 2021 portrait for comparison.

She wrote, What the fuck?

Then she asked her followers for help adding, quote, it doesn't totally feel like parallel thinking to me.

I'm a small artist, an independent artist who's trying to make money and live off of my artwork.

After Trolls criticized the allegation, she called the footage a joke or satire in a comment.

She said, when I realized it wasn't landing as a joke, I deleted it.

Didn't mean any offense.

However, TikTok users expressed mixed feelings about her explanation.

Ah, the it was a joke defense when the thing you meant seriously turned out to be horribly out of touch.

Yeah.

Another, she can't seriously be accusing of Taylor Swift of stealing her idea of setting a table.

But sure, piggyback off another artist to get your name out there.

Yeah.

Tenler's defenders, meanwhile, wrote that her video was obviously a joke calling haters simply unable to read her tone.

If it was a joke, like this

Jackie, there was so nothing even remotely.

The driest sense of humor, but honestly, reading back what she said, like and reading it, knowing that it was a joke, if it wasn't really a joke and she meant it as a joke, it's honestly like kind of funny.

I know, but like, I kind of wish

you like,

okay, so let's just start at the beginning.

Cause I saw this TikTok and I'm like, oh my God, such a stretch, first of all.

Like a dining room table is not an original idea that you can

own.

And so on stage, Taylor is like setting a dining room table and it's meant to convey, you know, this relationship that's really one-sided.

And I guess Anna Marie Temler is like a photographer and she has like a photo of herself that she sells for like six grand of her sitting at a dining room table with like nobody on the other end you know um

so not only is that like not an original idea that you can like have as your own to think that but then to say it out loud is so embarrassing and i'm telling you i watched the video like jackie there is no semblance of a joke like it's not a joke and i think the absolute loseriest response to something that you can do is be like i was kidding like you weren't you thought you were ripped off so stand by it because to make an accusation like that against taylor like you know everyone's gonna come for you Even if you have, even if your accusation had merit, you know her fans are going to come for you.

So you need to be prepared.

Also, if she was joking, she's making fun of these small artists who do always say like, so-and-so stole my idea.

I'm an independent artist who's trying to make money and live off my artwork.

And so like, I think that that's kind of funny, but I'm not like in like the art world.

No, that's worse.

Yeah, it is kind of worse because like she is an artist and I feel like she is someone who would like take some of that stuff seriously.

We've just seen like so many versions of it at this point.

Like, I feel like the first few times that we saw it, it was really clear, like there was copying happening, but now people will do it about anything.

So, she might be making fun of that trend, but I just,

it's a really niche

joke.

It's a bad joke, and she's an artist, not a comedian.

Um, so like, it's important to keep that in mind.

And like, I just, if we're taking the video on Fate's value, her being like, I'm trying to make a living, like, she literally sells photos of herself for like five to ten grand.

And her ex-husband is John Mulaney.

Like, Like, she's completely fine,

since why it might have been a joke, right?

But it wasn't funny, like, yikes,

yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jokes should be funny, but like, I don't know, maybe she just has this, like, a really, I didn't see the video, but now I'm sure if I watched it now and like knew it was a joke, I would find it funny because that is like something that people do all the time.

Like, oh, I did this, and this person did that.

They copied me when it really is parallel thinking.

Like, two people can have the idea to sit at a dining table alone.

Okay, now you're kind of like making me think like maybe it was a joke.

Like, but like it wasn't, Jackie.

She was like visibly shaken in the video.

Like

you don't think she was putting on like one of these people who's like,

oh, I don't know.

I mean, if she, okay.

Here, wait.

I can watch it for myself.

Yeah, watch it.

Put the

speaker near your mic so people can hear you.

Wait, hold on.

I'm watching a video of me right now.

How did that happen?

Why?

I don't know.

I keep trying to click this link from Oops Deleted Videos.

TikTok video.

Okay.

Taylor, my girl.

People who designed Taylor's tour.

This tolerated setup looks strikingly like one of my photographs in tone and in aesthetics.

It doesn't totally feel like parallel thinking to me.

I'm a small artist, uh, independent artist who's trying to make money and live off of my artwork.

Uh, I don't know what to do about this, and maybe somebody can help me.

Okay, now hearing it again, like through the lens of like perhaps it being a joke, like it is kind of funny.

And I think it is a joke, but she's fucking roasting these small creators who like claim that everyone who does something similar to them is stealing their art.

No, and by the way, there is legitimate thievery that goes on, like for sure, but people get so carried away because like people,

those types of videos like get a lot of engagement and it's like great exposure for like an artist or whatever.

But they're out of hand.

Like when I see people being like, I went for a walk and then Ariana Grande went for a walk.

It's like, calm down.

Like every, they take it too far.

So like, and I guess that's kind of the,

message she's kind of sending with her.

But it's extremely like

niche and convoluted and hard to understand.

And I feel if I knew Anna Marie Tenler's personality, like, if I followed her for years, I would be able to tell you whether or not this was a joke.

But this is like the first time I've ever seen her speak.

So, I don't know.

Does she actually talk like that when she's being serious?

Or is she like being like, that's right, is she?

Right.

Here's the question: Is she a weenie or is she not?

Because that was giving weenie energy.

And is that how she is?

Yeah.

I'm inclined to give her the benefit of the doubt.

And if so, it's a funny joke.

And like everyone,

I feel bad that.

She must have a pit.

I feel bad it didn't go the way that she had wanted.

I feel bad as well.

Yikes.

Yeah, yikes.

Yeah.

It's not great.

No, it's not.

But I'm going to I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt because I think she could use the grace in the situation.

And I know we teased this earlier, but we kind of have some breaking news from fastgrowingtrees.com.

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How'd you land on an orange tree?

So my experience shopping at fastgrowingtrees.com was amazing.

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different climates.

Like obviously I'm not getting a pine tree.

Right.

But with fast growing trees, like you put in where you live and they tell you what zone you're in.

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Then I almost got some sort of lemon tree, but then I read it wasn't really safe for pets.

So I was like, no can do.

They really like make it so easy for someone who's obviously not a tree connoisseur to find the right tree for them.

I did want some citrus trees in my yard at some point.

So I got an orange tree.

I planted it and I had to find the right area for it where it would get sun, where I could water it.

And I found an area that I'm actually going to turn into a little garden when I am

no longer pregnant because you cannot garden when you're pregnant.

But the tree is just planting the tree and letting it blossom.

And also I love the orange tree because it's a pretty low lift.

Eventually it'll yield fruit.

And I'm going to have a lot of oranges and I'm not going to share any of them with Ben.

Good.

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Today's episode is also brought to you by Skylight Frames.

So, you know what?

I actually had like a whole script plan for this read about how, you know, Ben's birthday is coming up and I've been just like really loving Ben.

But I'm going to change.

Let's do like a narrative change.

Last night really put into perspective how important Theo is for me.

And that's why I got a Skylight Frame and filled it with pictures of Theo, pictures of me and Theo, picture of Theo as and Bruno, Theo and Jackie.

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And they like, it's their first time seeing it on a frame in their house.

Like, that's so sweet.

I just sit by my frame and like see what everyone's going to send to it.

You know, I'm, I'm kind of like, you know, Regina George.

I don't send them.

I just get them.

That's so true.

So true.

Our next story.

Shaquille O'Neal is reassuring fans that there's no need to worry after having some hip surgery.

He said, just got some BBL work.

Shaq is in good spirits after having hip surgery.

The retired NBA star told fans he was doing just fine a day after he posted a photo to his social media accounts showing him in a hospital bed with an IV attached to him.

So I think at first people were really concerned, like Shaq, what's going on?

You're in the hospital.

So we said to all the people who are worried and concerned, first off, let me say thank you.

And lastly, no need to worry.

Just had to get some BBL work, aka hip replacement.

Thanks and love you all, but no need to worry.

And yes, I'm fine.

You know what?

I feel like I learned this from Emily Simpson from the Real Housewives of Orange County, Chris Jenner, and my friend's mom who recently just got one.

Like a hip replacement is literally like

the best thing that can ever happen to like someone of a certain age.

Like, they say it gives you a totally new life.

Like, remember when Emily Simpson from Orange County House is like out here doing cartwheels with her new hip?

Yeah.

And she was like, I never would have been able to do this.

And Chris Jenner, too.

And it's like such a low lift, 30-minute surgery.

And it like really changes your life.

Yeah.

Well, Shaq had had a goal to lose 60 pounds by his 51st birthday.

And he just turned 51.

He had lost 40 pounds so far.

So he got the hip replacement surgery to help him, not to help him lose the next 20, but like that's going to give him, you know, even more of the flexibility to lose the next 20 and then he said he's going to be doing underwear commercials with his kids i don't even know how like an anesthesiologist would like do the math to get shaq down like he's so big

and i feel like they have to get like a special table he can't fit on like a regular operating room table right it looks like a regular table there's no way and

you know that they put like an artificial hip in that's what it is you're kind of like a bionic man or woman yeah yeah he He definitely had to get special parts made.

Like he's too big.

Yeah.

No, he definitely needed a bigger hip than, say, Christian or I would need.

Yeah.

That's interesting.

I just often think about all the accommodations that probably need to be made for Shaq.

Like, of course, the first thing that comes to mind is like travel, but he probably travels private most of the time anyway.

So that doesn't seem like a big deal.

But just like everyday life things.

And thank God Shaq became rich and famous.

Because like, if it wasn't, like, Shaq could not fit in like regular first class.

No, or like a regular car a sedan right or an uber or a taxi or the subway even yeah

thank god shaq is rich like

yeah i i wonder if he thinks about that like express his gratitude of course for all the things he have but how difficult his life would be if not yeah and all his clothes are custom

it's tall but it's also wide and like girth yeah he's also um everything he wears is custom clothing because he can't shop i don't even think he could shop at the big and tall store but like what about the people who are Shaq's size who aren't rich and famous?

I don't think, seriously, there are a lot of people like that.

I would imagine if you're that tall, like, you're automatically a good basketball player because you could just like stand at the hoop and just like touch the ball of the men.

Right.

So, like, was Shaq even a good player?

Or did he just stand at the hoop and make sure every ball went in?

Right.

And just oversee what was going on below.

Because he could see the whole thing.

Yeah.

It's a question worth asking.

Yeah.

You should ask Ben at a later date.

Not today.

I'm so done with him.

Yeah, don't make him feel like big and smart today.

I feel like actually speaking, like Shaq is one of Ben's idols.

Like, Ben loves Shaq.

He seems like an awesome guy based on my limited knowledge of the sports world.

Like, he's obviously a great athlete.

He's a father of many.

He's now

a commentator.

He's a DJ.

He's a businessman.

Like, he's funny, too, with his BBL joke.

Like, he seems like an all-around great guy who's not affected by the fame and the riches.

Yeah.

And I feel like we've spoken about this once because like a couple of months ago, maybe actually like a year ago, there was a story about how Shaq paid for everyone's checks at a restaurant in the city.

Remember?

Oh, she's about to sneeze.

But she remembers.

I do remember.

And we were talking about how like he was on a date with a girl and like, what must it be like to be intimate with Shaq?

Like, you know, this morning, I was about to say last night, but it was this morning.

I watched that episode of Sex in the City where Samantha runs into that guy on the street and

he says to her, like, listen, I've had a lot of trouble with the ladies because I'm extremely well endowed.

And she's like, oh, trust me, it's nothing I can't handle.

And she actually ends up not being able to handle it and they just have to be friends.

I feel like that's shock.

Yeah, maybe that's his struggle.

Right.

Too much.

Maybe that's the thing that...

Well, I mean, he had a number of children, so somebody did it.

Somebody handled it.

Yeah.

And then gave birth to, you know, children related to Shaq.

God bless that woman.

Little Shaqs.

Yeah, which they probably weren't so little.

No.

I wonder how big they were at birth.

And I'm sure, I think I actually read somewhere, one of his kids, I think, is like hoping to be in the NBA.

So they're tall.

They are.

Yeah.

Great.

Yeah.

Great.

Are you ready for our fifth and final story, which is a twofer?

Yes.

Because it's Bravo News main category.

Subset A.

Ariana Maddox tells Tom Sandoval to die in the first post-affair Pump Rules trailer.

So Vander Pump Rules released the mid-season trailer yesterday, and it's what we can expect to see the rest of the season.

A lot of stuff that we knew that was coming: Sheena's wedding, Schwartz and Raquel making out.

They edited some footage to look to

point us in the direction of like Tom and Raquel a little bit.

Yeah, but there is a scene at the end where Tom's like going through the cupboard.

Sandoval is going through the cupboard and is like, Can I get you anything?

Or do you, uh, what does he say?

He said, You want anything?

And Ariana says, For you to die.

Such a good fucking answer.

So I think

it's that that might have been filmed post-Scandoval.

Oh, yeah.

I think,

by the way, a lot of it was filmed post-scandival because when Sheena's sitting in that like white furry bucket hat, those are the paparazzi pictures of her walking into Ariana's house.

Like, I would, they literally threw together this mid-season finale with the footage they've shot in the last two weeks.

Like,

most of it, I was hoping that some of it was from the new footage.

I figured that like the stuff from not, you know, Ariana saying to die, but some of the other stuff was from the actual season because like Sheena's always crying in a bucket, like whatever.

That's literally

that stuff.

Okay, now I need to watch it again, like hearing what Sheena said.

No, I've watched it 45,000 times, like looking for new like facts, new leads, new clips and like tips.

It looks very good.

I am curious if they're, you know, gonna...

continue with the rest of the season unedited and then add more or cut out some of the crap we're gonna probably end up watching this season?

I think add more.

They said that they're not re-editing the episodes.

This is a boom for Vanderpump.

Like now they have extra episodes.

That's like more, what advertiser wouldn't buy into that?

Any other show that's waiting to get on the air is gonna have to wait.

Like we don't care.

And it seems like every episode that's coming out, Andy keeps saying like the foreshadowing is crazy.

You know, in tonight's episode, like Sheena has a conversation with Raquel being like, calling her a home-wrecking whore like as a joke about like hooking up with Schwartz.

Right.

She said, I was the original home-wrecking whore, then it was Lala, now it's you.

So true.

No, you know what?

So true.

And I know, given like the

way we've been talking since the most recent episode of Anna Prime Birls, you guys might think, like, I'm not Team Ariana, but like, I totally am.

But, like, Ariana hasn't offended me in the last episodes.

Like, it's Lala

yesterday.

We were saying yesterday how, like, you know, the girls who are all speaking on behalf of Ariana are like going so hard and being almost thirsty.

Um, when it's really important to remember that Katie and Ariana are the only two people on this entire show who have never cheated on their spouses.

So, like, Lala being so mad when she was a mistress, Sheena being so mad when she was a mistress.

Again, she was Lala and Sheena weren't friends with the girls, but still, it's still cheating.

So, the moral high ground everyone has found themselves on, in my opinion, is extremely unfounded and they have no right to be there.

Yeah, there's that is a part of it.

Especially it's like everyone's certain dynamics are different.

It's like Lala

was, you know, the M-word, which she hates to be called, but also she hooked up with Raquel's boyfriend when Raquel was dating him.

Like, eh, you don't get as much of a say.

Sheena was a mistress and she defended Raquel all season and encouraged some of this nefarious behavior with friends as men.

X, you don't get a say.

Katie gets a say because she was on the receiving end of Raquel's nefarious behavior and because she's never done this in a situation.

Of course, Ariana is the complete victim here.

But

everyone's like, you know, a little bit like

high and mighty.

Look in the mirror, just a little, you know.

Yeah.

But also it's like, but when they did those things, they went through it.

So like when it comes to the passage,

it's no, and so like, yeah raquels did it yesterday like we're talking about it today right right right and honestly i am less focused on raquel like for me this is all about tom sandoval it's always been about tom sandoval i've been saying since the day i started watching this show he's literally the worst person on the face of the planet.

Now everyone believes me, but I feel like everyone's getting caught up in the Raquel Rachel drama.

But it's like, let's not fucking forget about Tom Sandoval.

I feel like people are forgetting.

Also, like calling her Rachel, like, just does nothing for me.

No, it's like, like, people are like, her name is not even Raquel.

She's thirsty.

She has a stage name.

Okay.

So does Lala.

So does Jax.

Jax's name was Jason Couchy.

Lala's name is Lauren.

Like, it's not a good read.

Everyone's being like, Rachel.

It's not a good cringe.

It actually just makes it a little confusing just because there are already so many characters in this story.

And it's like, wait, who's Rachel?

So true.

Okay, well, every night, like literally, Zach comes in.

He's like, is Vanderprom on tonight?

Oh, that's so cute.

And tomorrow, right?

Tomorrow.

We're like obsessed.

It's so good.

It's so good.

And the thing is, even though we haven't gotten to the meat and potatoes yet, like I'm still living for it.

So I don't think they should edit anything.

I think that they should, it's playing out in a way that's really letting us see like the villain origin story.

The villain origin story.

So the trailer that dropped was really good.

And now I need to go watch it again knowing that Sheena's Bucket Hat was last week.

Yes, yes.

Those are, yeah.

And then are you ready for part two of Bravo News that I found so exciting?

Summerhouse star Sierra Miller is Bravo's first Victoria's Secret model.

I love this.

Sierra is the first Bravo leverty to become a Victoria's Secret model, posing in bras, panties, robes, and athletic wear for a new photo shoot featured on the Lingerie Giants website.

She told PageSix Style exclusively, it's been a dream for as long as I can remember to work for Victoria's Secret.

She joined the show as a, primarily as a working ICU nurse, but she's been modeling since she was just 15.

She said, I put myself through nursing school working as a model.

So it's always been a positive venture for me.

Of course, working as a Victoria's Secret model is the ultimate goal.

She said she's still thoroughly shocked when she saw herself splashed across the VS website.

The pictures are absolutely gorgeous.

And she said she hopes to continue working with the brand and would love to walk in the iconic Victoria's Secret fashion show, which is set to return this year after a four-year hiatus.

That was going to be my question.

I'm assuming if they're doing like this big partnership with her, that

it's definitely a possibility.

I don't know why it wouldn't be.

She's perfection.

And I love, I mean, if anyone from Bravo was going to become a Victoria's Secret model, it had to be someone from Summerhouse because they're always in bathing suits.

And so it being Sierra is perfection.

I didn't even know she had modeling experience.

That's just like a cherry on top.

But like her thing is like model slash nurse.

I don't remember that.

I just remember nurse.

Oh, I remember there was a model in there.

Well, I love that.

And I think this is great.

I'm so happy for her.

Yeah.

If the show is like a walking fashion show where they're going to have angels, influencers, brand ambassadors walking, like I really hope she walks.

But I feel like, I don't know where I saw this.

I think it might have been in our comments.

Like someone said the Victoria's Secret fashion show like isn't going to be.

like a fashion show.

I don't know.

It's like maybe.

So it's not a real fashion show that feels like a real fashion show.

Maybe it's like a presentation or something.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I can't remember what I heard, but like something about it threw a wrench into things for me.

All right.

I mean, we'll wait and see.

But I hope she walks in.

I'm glad that she's open to walking, you know, because obviously there's so much negativity surrounding the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show.

But on the one hand, like it would be a huge opportunity for someone.

On the other hand, they might not want to be associated with like the stain of it.

Right, right.

But I think for like, you know, a model turned nurse turned reality star, it's a huge opportunity.

You would never turn that down.

And I don't think that you should.

So I hope to see Sierra up there shaking that thing.

I'd rather see you out there shaking that thing, Jax.

You would?

Hopefully they'll have a pregnant woman.

And I would love to see it.

I would love to see it, but I'll be okay if they didn't.

Yeah.

Oh, you, but you

will.

You'll be out of a job.

Oh, it could be me.

Oh, my God.

Literally no.

Would you ever do it?

I feel like I would sooner do it pregnantly.

100%.

Right?

Because then nobody could call you fat.

Literally.

I just want to say like total tangent.

Like, sorry.

I have no nail polish left on my nails.

I was like so anxious in the thing yesterday.

I left, I had like a tissue in my lap and I literally collected like chips of my nail polish until there's nothing left and all my nails are broken.

Like I am disgusting.

Claudia, that's beautiful.

I think I'm going to get a manicure today.

If you should do something like that, like a little self-care for Turdy Lou, maybe like a scalp massage.

I can't.

Like, I can't.

I have so many things to do.

I have to take care of my son, Jackie.

He needs to text Frank.

He doesn't have two working eyes.

No, you know, I'm feeling now at the end of the show.

Let's do a follow-up from, you know, we're from where we started, which was fucking dark.

I apologize.

I'm feeling better.

I think I'll make it to physical therapy.

Okay, good.

You might relax.

Like, that might be like, sometimes you don't need a nap.

You just need like to quiet your mind.

Yeah.

I think you should meditate.

I don't think so I did it once I remember you told me and it was so relaxing I did like a 20 minute session and it was just what I needed like because I didn't have the time to take a nap also naps make me feel like crap and so I meditated and literally my mind shut down it like it was like a reboot for the mind just saying

I think that's what you mean.

Think about it.

Yeah, like put on, there's a million.

I had done it with the Aura Ring app, but you could do the calm app.

you have to listen to

you have to listen to what they're saying and they will put you in a trance i just don't know how people meditate like how do you either like do a guided meditation let someone let someone tell you how no i know what i'm saying like how do you stop yourself from either falling asleep or like thinking about like your anxious you know intrusive thoughts no you either focus on what the guide is saying or if you do fall asleep like great You're very relaxed.

It's very meditative to be asleep.

Yeah, like I think towards the end, I like got a couple minutes of shut eye and like I felt really good because I didn't go into like a deep bear's nap.

Right.

But I was like, it was a reboot for the mind.

Okay, I'll think about it.

Turdy Lou added to the list.

Well, aren't you proud of me?

Now I'm saying I'll think about it, not like, no, it sucks.

That's so true.

Growth.

It's called growth, Jax.

It's called growth.

You are a grower, not a shower.

I am most certainly a grower.

That's our show.

You want to take the people out today?

What?

You want to take them home?

Sure.

Well, I'm going to take you till 5 o'clock because that is when Freaking Fred.

So if you don't know what that is, and it's like, what do you guys keep saying, Freaking Fred?

We are doing a live show tonight at 5 o'clock on via our Patreon channel.

Via Patreon.

So if you are a patron, like this is not news to you, but if you're not a patron, basically you could sign up right now, patreon.com slash the toast at 4.55 Eastern Time.

We will drop a link for where you can watch our live show.

And we will start at 5 o'clock.

And Claudiaria and I are just going to be like.

girlying, talking about pop culture.

We talk about like the big subjects of the week.

And then also there's a live chat.

So we get to get your guys's opinions on stuff, which is really exciting.

And I feel like this one is going to be really fun.

I weirdly, a few days ago was watching last month's.

I don't know why.

It just came up

something.

And I was thoroughly enjoying it.

And it's just really relaxing and fun.

It's really fun.

It's a good way to like wind down for the day.

It is.

And it's just like bonus content from your girlies.

So patreon.com slash a toast will be live at 5 p.m.

Eastern time.

Until then, we hope you have an amazing day.

Thank you so much for listening to the toast, the millennial podcast period.

You can find us anywhere you listen to podcasts and on YouTube.

And if you're listening on YouTube, please leave a thumbs up.

Don't feel free.

Just do it and subscribe and give us lots of love and engagement.

We shall see you tomorrow.

Bye.

I like that.

Bye.

I don't have to do it exactly like you.

No.

I have my own mind.

You're an independent woman, girl.

I'm of my own mind.

Love you, baby.

She's of her own mind.

Don't forget it.