S4 Ep210: Menstruation in Space: Tuesday, December 7th, 2021

Good morning, millennials.

Welcome back to the morning toast.

Happy Tuesday.

Hope everyone had a splendid, wonderful, rejuvenating Monday.

I think everyone did.

From what I was seeing, everyone seems to be splendid, wonderful, and rejuvenating.

I think that we're speaking for ourselves as well.

Yes.

And now it's a wonderful Tuesday, also known as Dues Day, because Duke Dadu is in the building, and I plan on LARPing with him all show long.

LARP, LARP, LARP.

If that bothers you,

sorry.

I can't help it.

I know.

If you knew do,

then you wouldn't know what it's like to lose yourself in a LARP.

But you don't.

LARP, I recently learned means.

Oh, did we not talk about this on the main show?

We talked about it on the Patreon.

Oh, right, right, right.

Because someone accused me

of LARPing with the dogs.

And so I said that to Claudia because I didn't really know what LARPing was.

And she told me that it's live-action role play.

And yeah, no, that's exactly what I do.

Isn't it nice to have a word now like associated with who you are as a person?

100%.

It's like clarity.

I feel seen.

100%.

And you love to see it.

You do love to see it.

Yes, it was a rejuvenating day.

Like I did something I don't think I've done in five years.

I slept the entire day.

My body is just, you don't understand.

I laid in bed for two years straight and then I had five back-to-back days with 10,000 steps.

Like that's just not how I work.

Yeah.

So my body's in shock.

And when I got back from the toast yesterday, I have so much to do.

I passed out.

I couldn't even keep my eyes open.

I was just dead.

I still don't feel like 100% bounce back.

No, I mean it takes time.

You have to listen to your body.

I'm trying.

Keenly.

Keenly.

And what was your body saying?

We're tired.

Please stop moving.

And I said, ma'am, I understand.

I don't want this any more than you do.

Yeah.

So you, you took the time.

I feel like I actually might sleep the whole day again today.

Like, I know I sound dramatic for someone who literally worked for five days, but it's so laborious on your body, like the traveling and then like the mental anguish of like being in front of people and then the actual doing stand-up for an hour.

Like it's, and then flying out the next day.

Like it was, and then I also went to a wedding like it's actually so hard on your body so especially when your body looks like mine so I'm very much enjoying this two-week period but this also is just like the busiest week you know everyone I know who like lives in LA is in New York I have like so many holiday parties this week I'm just not ready how nice for you so many parties I don't mean to rub parties parties parties no it is a two-week grind over here and sometimes self-care looks like sleeping in the whole day I know you know and I just feel I felt like I woke up I felt so guilty Like, I had so many emails.

Like, I didn't answer any of them.

I'm just like, I need a break.

Like, I need a break.

Well, we have a break coming up, which is going to be really nice.

So you just got to rise and grind for the next two weeks.

And we told everyone, right, our last show of the year, Morning Show season four

wraps on December 17th.

So,

yeah, that's crazy.

Whenever we like come to the end of a year and we're like wrap up our season, it blows my mind that we've been doing this for four years and then two years before that.

Yeah.

Like we're going in our fifth season.

We're going into our fifth season, which is so exciting.

I love a new season.

Me too.

Like, I have like a new enthusiasm, a new outlook.

Whenever I come back from a vacation, like, I literally think I'm in a movie.

Like, I'm a different person.

Yeah.

I mean, you can be anyone that you want to be.

That's so true.

So, and everything is just so festive this time of year.

It's like, even though we're rising and we're grinding, like, there's lights up on the trees, like, even in the streets, you know, it's just a nice time

of year.

And the weather is like, today is really chilly.

But it's like gorgeous.

It's been like gorgeously chilly for the last few weeks.

Chilly.

Yum.

Ooh, it might be a chilly day.

I need a break.

From chili?

Yeah,

I was going too hard too often.

And even though a chili sounds delicious right now, I can't deal with a fridge full of chili again.

I fully understand.

I fully understand.

With chili, maybe I should try something else.

Or a new chili recipe.

I know.

Chili is just so fucking good.

You know,

you should make a chili for me, and I should make a chili for you.

That way we have like.

well the thing is like I don't really make chili Ben does one time I made it like he told me exactly what to do over Facebook.

It's just like I just want a bowl of chili not a fucking vat.

Yeah, no, but like once you make it like you got to make leftovers Of course, what's the point?

No, totally

the beauty of a chili chili is low-key toxic like such a vicious cycle.

It is

we have an amazing show because it's Tuesday, which means we have deer toasters in addition to the gorgeous Fast Five stories that you need to know.

And I'm ready to just like change people's lives with our advice.

I really am.

I am too.

And I'm ready to dive right in because we have a lot to talk about.

There's one story in particular that

should have been mentioned yesterday, but I guess I'm just, you know, blocking it out.

We all know

when we say it.

And so I think without further ado, we could jump right in.

I don't have any other life updates other than just enjoying the rose code.

Other than the fact that you're pregnant and can't do anything.

Right.

I was reading all day yesterday, and the book is really good.

So thank you to everyone who recommended it.

I'm glad.

Now, without further ado, it is time for the fast-five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

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Love it.

Okay, our first story, some sad news that emerged this weekend, but I want to break it down with you guys and let you know that it's going to be okay.

Little Mix is taking a break.

I know.

So Little Mix put out a statement like out of nowhere.

Nobody asked for this.

Nobody was questioning anything.

Nobody was worried about them.

And all of a sudden, they said, we wanted to let you all know that after the confetti tour in April, May next year, we are going to be taking a break from Little Mix.

It's been 10 amazing years, a wonderful non-stop adventure, and we feel the time is right to take a break so we can recharge and work on some other projects.

We can't thank you enough for your love and never-ending support since the beginning.

We love you all so much.

We are not splitting up.

Little Mix is here to stay.

We have plans for...

for more music, tours, and performances in the future.

We've made so many incredible memories with you all, and we can't wait to make so many more.

We're sisters and we'll always have each other and you the fans in our lives.

Little mix is forever.

See you on tour, Jade, Leanne, and Perry.

Okay, I think we should break this down for a multitude of reasons.

First of all, I do like that they said we're not breaking up, but there's some other worrisome facts in this.

Like we want to pursue other projects.

That means like maybe one of them has a lot of success with a solo queer and doesn't want to come back even though she intends to right now.

Yeah.

It sounds like the One Direction hiatus.

They're still technically on hiatus.

Okay.

And that was after a member left.

I know.

It definitely feels like it's mirroring one direction, but I'm going to give you mixers all the reasons why we shouldn't panic yet.

First of all, they did say that they're not splitting up.

Second of all, two of the ladies are new moms.

So like, of course, they need a break.

The only thing that's weird to me is like, why can't they just take a break without announcing that they're taking a break?

The announcement makes it feel weird.

Plenty of artists don't put out music for years at a time.

I do.

So the announcement is weird because I would hope that the ladies want to take time off.

Would take time off.

And when it comes comes to solo projects i don't think that that's why they're taking a break because i do think that for the new moms like they're trying to work less not more and like why would you want to start like building up a whole new solo career when you have a great thing doing

yes and maybe she'll do like she'll be on some songs while the other girls are home and and that works for me

but i think i really really truly believe that like they love each other i think they love being little mix i don't feel like it's a fifth harmony or one direction situation where there is one person who's always been waiting to be a a solo artist no i completely agree these three they're they're in harmony together i couldn't if you if i had to say who would have the biggest solo career out of the three that are left i really wouldn't know i mean if i had to say i might say perry only because of all the zane stuff in my opinion she's the most famous one at least in america okay but like is she the most talented no together they're really i agree better together they're really one-third they all pull their weight and with jesse leaving and like going on her solo career like i don't think that it's tempting them to do the same I don't think it's going it's a flop central and nobody wants to be that right so I believe we have every reason to be hopeful to be optimistic I think that they will come back and other projects could also mean like movies you know so I'm not I would I would be more alarmed if they didn't take a break after like 10 years of bangers and now two kids yes I agree I'm not that worried but just if history has taught us anything it's not to be we're not totally unclear No, but like

everything about the messaging, even like their new song, Between Us, is about them as a band.

Like, nothing comes between us.

And it's such a good song, and they use that as the

soundtrack for the video that they posted.

And then they sang it on the Graham Norton show, and they were all like crying and hugging at the end.

Like, I

crying and hugging does not bode well.

No, because they're going to, because they love it.

They love it so much.

They were, like, I'm, I feel good about Little Mix.

And also, like, I could use a break from Little Mix.

Like, they've been my top artists year after year and like I can we could take a break.

Expand.

Yeah.

Diversify the catalog.

Yeah.

I'm good with a break from them.

By the way, anyone who wants to take a break, an actual break, like I will always encourage mental health, being in spotlight is so taxing.

I fully encourage people to take breaks.

We should normalize taking more breaks.

But a break is often a euphemism.

Even when Jesse first left the band, she said she was taking a mental health break and we were like, please go forth, prosper.

And then of course, that's not what it was.

So

we have been burned so many times.

That we're just skeptical.

Yeah.

I think that's fair.

But I

am not as skeptical as I could be.

Also,

which is weird timing, BTS announced that they're also taking a break, but they were like, we're tired.

Like, they were also very clear about what it is.

They're like, we're not breaking up.

Like, we're exhausted.

Why do bands feel the need to let us know when they need

when they're having a break in between albums?

Like, that's so normal.

Right, no, it's like your PTO.

Yeah.

No, I agree.

It's always the announcement that gives us like the willy-nillies.

100%.

Yeah.

So I do feel like some bands, when someone leaves, it tears them apart.

Like Fifth Harmony without Camilla Cabello is just a bunch of, I'm sorry, like, except for Normani, average performers, like hanging out.

It's like a cover band.

So that made sense.

When Zane left One Direction, I think they were better without him.

Like, I didn't think they needed him to be what they were.

And the same goes for Jesse.

Like, I actually think her leaving might have even made the band better.

So, I don't think it's one of those situations where someone leaves and it tears apart the whole band like it did Fifth Harmony.

I just feel like with One Direction, like, you could always feel them, like, bursting out the seams.

Like, they don't want to be these, like, boy banders, teeny boppers.

You know, Harry Styles, like, is Mick Jagger and he's got to go do his own thing.

Like, that feel natural.

But I feel like for Little Mix, like, the band is really where they are in their lives.

It's a reflection of who they are.

It don't feel like they're, like, putting on.

They're tied to the band in a way that they hate.

Yeah, I agree.

And that they're like, you know, it's, they go on stage and they have to pretend to be people that they're not.

Right.

I think they get to be fully creative, exactly how they want to be, the songs that they want to make, the songs they want to sing.

I agree.

I think that they're creatively fulfilled by the band.

Whereas like one direction, they were just like weird.

Turning up hit after hit like

hit factory.

Yeah.

Such good music.

Such good music.

The best set I was ever heard.

I think they were like embarrassed to be performing it, which is embarrassing for them.

Yeah, I agree.

Like, you need to work on it yourself if you feel embarrassed by some of those unbelievable hits made in the AM.

It was bop after bop after bop after bop.

And I just,

it actually makes sense now that they broke up because a band that good making songs that were only better than the next, really, it's not sustainable.

It can't last forever.

So

that's not even why they broke up.

They didn't even, I think they thought the songs were bad.

No, they thought their music was trash.

And

I think like as a society, people probably, unless you're like a directioner, you probably like, oh, one direction, boy band.

They don't even know.

No, they don't.

The music that was made in those like five years, I think is some of the best pop music to ever grace the earth.

And I'm not being like dramatic, I'm being dead fucking serious.

I totally agree with you, and I actually feel like they're never going to come to that conclusion because Harry has had so much success solo.

So, has like really all of them have.

So, they can't.

No, actually, I would argue that only two of them have.

Zane's solo career is flop central.

Oh, I wasn't even thinking about Zane.

I'm talking about the four who like Liverpool.

Lewis is like,

But he doesn't see features.

Yeah, no, he doesn't.

I think Liam is always like

some song on the chart.

No, I think

Liam and Lewis are like

irrelevant.

Lewis is the most irrelevant.

I think he's tied for last with Liam.

Liam.

No, Liam is just like always.

Because I know Lewis has gone through a lot of personal things in the last few years.

So the fact that his career is not like number one priority makes a lot of sense.

Like he's dealing with a lot.

Got it.

Okay, well.

Whatever.

I think the worst of all the solo careers has to be Zane because he tried just as hard as the rest of them, but failed the worst.

Really?

Like that most recent album, Pillows.

No, no, Jackie, that was like a million years ago.

That was like right after he left.

And he did some good shit with Taylor.

But then he put out this album most recently.

He had like this van going around New York City.

It was so sad.

It's called like Nobody's Listening, which was so ironic because nobody was listening.

I couldn't name one song off the album.

It's like flop, flop, flop.

So I think of all their solo careers, like his was probably the worst.

Interesting, but also because he made the biggest stink about it.

Right.

Yeah.

Okay, so we'll.

And oh, sorry, one more thing.

Like when we analyze the solo careers, what I didn't see coming from the solo careers was like Niall being really close to the best one.

Obviously, no one beats Harry, but Niall's like way up there.

Niall is nothing to smirk about.

100%.

It is.

I saw him in concert.

He underratedly has so many bops.

He does.

I feel like he still shows up to the hit factory and asks for music.

You know what?

Maybe he's the only one in the band with any tastes.

100%.

He's like, let me in.

I want I want at the Hit Factory.

His music is so good.

Yeah, no, I agree.

But it's very hit factory.

Right.

That's why it's good.

Which is why it's good.

Okay, we'll let you know if Little Mix, you know, gives us any more signals.

But I would say for now, mixers

remain calm.

No cause for alarm.

Yeah, they've been through a lot as a band.

Yeah.

So

I'm so here for it if it is what it is.

If it is what it seems.

Our next story, some fun comedy news.

Netflix announces a comedy festival called Netflix is a Joke.

It will be an 11-day festival held in Los Angeles in 2022 where over 130 comedians will perform.

A live festival or like on the TV?

Like in person?

In person.

Like they're going to perform at, but it's also, it kind of reminds me of like New York City Comedy Festival where it's just like comedy shows all around town over the course of a month that are just billed under New York City Comedy Festival.

There are a lot of comedy festivals that like are

billed as a festival, but it's like there's no unity.

They're just like a bunch of random shows during the same four weeks.

When I hear there's an 11-day comedy festival, I'm like, oh my God, people are going to be sleeping in the desert for 11 days listening to comedy.

But it's not that.

It's like 25 Hollywood landmarks, such as the Greek Theater, the Hollywood Bowl, Dodger Stadium, and the Crypto.com Arena.

Oh, my God, first comedy show at the Crypto.com Arena.

We'll have all these comedians, including Dave Chappelle, Kevin Hart, Gabriel Iglesias, John Mulaney, Amy Schumer, Ali Wong, Amy Poehler, Aziz Ansari, Chelsea Handler, Chris Rock, Conan O'Brien, David Letterman, Ellen DeJevers.

Enough with David Letterman.

I'm about to start.

Jerry Seinfeld, Pete Davidson, Ray Romano, more.

That sounds very good.

Like a good one.

And I'm sure they're filming it, and it will be on Netflix.

Yeah, it'll be 11 specials, or whoever many people you just named.

25, I think you said.

130 total.

Oh, maybe not everyone's getting a special, but

I just.

Maybe some are going to get like

to get like variety, a variety show.

I just want to hark back to what i was saying about a minute ago i've really had enough of dave no david letterman um i never found you funny i never found you interesting and i just feel like we've got to let let it go like we're living in a different time and david letterman's like brand of like loser comedy i just don't think it's cutting it anymore and like when you see all these clips from his old show of how evil he used to be like i'm sorry why haven't you been canceled yet yeah not i'm slowly becoming very pro-cancel culture no but it's like cancel culture should just be.

It's selective and it shouldn't be.

No, yeah.

If it's gonna, if it's gonna exist, which it does, it's roaring through town.

Then everyone should get all on equal footing.

Yeah, and so David Letterman, like, you are on my list.

You need to be canceled, especially most egregiously, because you're not funny.

Like, you had Kim Kardashian for an hour and you thought it would be funny to take her to CBS.

Like, please.

No, and didn't ask her one new question that the true fans haven't known the answer to.

Yeah.

And like, thank God for her ebulence, talent, and radiance for making that hour so so interesting because God knows it wasn't the bearded lady, David Letterman.

Yeah, we know you're not about

Judge Letterman life.

I just feel like he got so famous.

I've said this before, he got so famous, so successful, like at the biggest show on television in a time where he was like one of three people who was up for it, like straight white man.

Like, you're just not funny anymore now that, like, everyone has a platform, you know, with the internet and everything.

Yeah.

So that's what I feel.

And I'm the president of his hater club, like 100%.

No, we know.

Next time I'll just skip over his name.

No, it's very triggering.

I don't know how many times you can hear the David Letterman ramp.

It's like enough.

Like, oh my God.

Everyone on that list, like,

love to see it.

Yeah.

And I'm sure there'll be a lot of like up-and-coming comedians if it is 130.

You know, and they'll be batched together.

So it could be a great platform to discover new comedy.

Fabulous, but enough with the David Letterman.

Okay.

Okay.

So we won't be watching that.

No, but that sounds cool.

It does.

It was supposed to happen last year, but then the pandemic.

Because, you know, it sounded familiar when you started reading the headline.

Yeah, but now it's here.

So if you, you know, happen to catch any shows, but it's also also just like going to a comedy show right i don't think it's the type of festival that you fly to it's like oh if you live in la there happened to be a lot of shows that one that month yeah no exactly but just they're under the unrelated like of netflix yeah they're all related to each other yeah no i have done two comedy festivals right one of them was minneapolis comedy festival which i don't think it's like

really got its legs yet and then i did just for laughs which is a legit one and i was very proud of that yeah exactly so very exciting for the comedy world i like that i like that netflix is taking things irl

Are you ready for our next story?

A little clarification.

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Great.

Now, Khloe Kardashian is clarifying Kylie and Travis's relationship status.

Chloe commented on a TikTok about the W magazine spread, which the spread said that they were

under the sheets, but they haven't.

They are not a couple.

Chloe commented saying, quote, wow, I don't know why this magazine would write this, but they are very much a couple.

This is the messiest thing ever.

Because if you're on the cover of a magazine and there's a whole article inside about you, that's because you sat down with an interviewer and they got all this information firsthand from you.

So I'm very confused.

It wasn't speculation by W Magazine because you sit down with a couple and they talk to you.

Right.

So did they make it up?

Did Kylie say it?

I'm extremely confused.

I'm extremely confused.

I can't believe like TMZ was so on the money.

This is just like another point in TMZ's column that it's like, okay, I'm going to give credence.

I'm going to refer to them on all things Kardashian, at least.

Yeah, at least like the next time.

The whole thing is so, I don't understand it.

Me neither.

How do we get here?

I don't know.

This is so messy.

Like, they really.

No, good to know that they're together.

Like, that's the takeaway here, but

what the fuck?

Yeah.

Like, so an article that was literally out for two days is already irrelevant.

Yeah, no, this is so embarrassing for W magazine.

Yeah, good for them no one's seeing it.

They probably just put all these errors in.

Totally.

Fuck it.

Is it a story about Travis's

legal situation?

No.

So, you know, there's all these lawsuits against him, and his official defense is like claiming absolutely no responsibility for anything that went on at the festival.

And people are obviously really offended by that.

Yeah.

I guess it's like

a legal defense.

So he's just trying to like

bear no legal responsibility, but obviously you are responsible.

Yeah, that's.

But it just makes him look.

Even worse if we didn't think that was possible.

Yes.

And also in more legal news, Jesse took the stand.

Yes, I'm not sure.

And said that the two people said this is MAGA country.

And today he's being cross-uh, examined.

Examined.

So hopefully, you know, the real questions will be asked, and we'll have some updates tomorrow.

Now, that is a court case I would be very interested in sitting in on.

Of course, we had to like watch him do all these interviews.

Like, I, but it's also like to be an actor on the stand.

I know that's what we were just talking about.

Did you watch the Alec Baldwin interview?

I did not.

I don't, I can't, I'm not, I'm not.

Okay, I watched it.

Okay.

And I think I just stand firm in

what I've said previously.

He said he didn't pull the trigger.

We got no clarification on the interview of like how exactly a woman died.

We got a lot about what Alec was feeling and how much Alec loves making a motion picture.

We got a lot of that.

It's clear that I do think this situation has really fucked with him.

And so I don't, I still

stand behind what I said.

Like, it was a horrible, horrible accident that I don't think Alec Baldwin was responsible for, but he could be doing a hell of a lot better job publicly at being more respectful for the woman who lost her life.

So what's the point of the interview?

Unclear.

So then, and if he's really, I mean, I would imagine if something like this happens, like, it's incredibly mentally disturbing.

What are you doing in an interview?

He's really honest.

And nobody asked for it, and you're still not giving answers.

You're giving no answers.

You're really like making the whole thing about yourself, even though we said at the beginning, like, I don't want to make this, I'm not the victim here.

And I was like, oh, good.

So then victim mentality, like stop putting yourself at the center of everything.

I just didn't.

The interview did nothing for me except double down my feelings on thinking like, I wish he didn't do this.

I wish he would act appropriately.

Him and his whole family like need to calm down a little bit, take some time out of the spotlight, stop doing interviews, stop pulling over on the side of the road to talk to TMZ because you're just making yourself look bad and it's hella disrespectful to the family of the woman who lost her life.

Right.

And like he says that he's going through all this mental anguish, but then he acts in a manner that doesn't represent that.

And so of course.

No, actually, he acts like he is losing his mind.

Like he really does.

He needs to stop.

Like I really find,

I'm struggling between like feeling bad for him.

Like, oh my God, what a horrible thing to go through.

But then also like really just having empathy for

the person who lost their life, the person who was shot, their family, and like having to watch Alec Baldwin like make this whole thing about himself.

Yeah.

So I don't think it was a wise PR move.

I don't think one thing he's done since this incident has been wise.

I didn't see anything that came out of the interview that made me feel compelled to watch it because it still felt like no answers and just like this man crying.

The most compelling thing was that he says he didn't pull the trigger, which like makes no sense.

Right.

No, no, no, but then just explain like, so how it went off.

Right.

He doesn't know.

So stop doing an interview when you have no information and let the police do their job.

Yep, agreed.

Okay, our next story is a little space news, a little spichemin.

Did you know that Michael Strahan is going to space in a few days?

I did know that.

And he's revealing the personal items that he's bringing to space, like some sentimental items.

He can only bring three pounds worth of personal belongings, so he chose very carefully.

Now, here's what he's bringing into space: things that mean a lot to him.

And then you can say, like, these things are.

Is it going to be a jersey?

No, it's really, like, really sentimental.

And then you can say, like, these things were in space.

So he's going to take along 12 shell casings from the 12-gun salute performed at his father's funeral.

Wow.

His Super Bowl ring, his Pro Football Hall of Fame ring of excellence, and two watches.

Wow.

A pocket watch.

Watches are heavy.

Yeah, no, a pocket watch that belonged to his maternal grandfather.

Mm-hmm.

A rare timepiece with a celestial face and a moon phase function.

Okay.

A lot of watches.

Watches.

And he'll also bring up a pearl necklace from his girlfriend's late grandmother.

Oh, that's so sweet.

So, so sweet.

Not to make everything about myself, but then I'm thinking, like, what would I do?

I have nothing of value.

It's like sentimental value in my home.

Well, you would, I think you would bring some toast merch.

Oh, it'd have to be really light.

I'd bring a toast pop socket.

Yeah, and I would also bring, I think, a little podcasting equipment, podcasting from space.

No, of course, no.

Okay, I could think of a million things for my business, but like, I don't really have, like,

like, if I had, like, something from daddy, like, I don't have anything.

What would I bring?

Yeah.

I guess I have, like, a watch.

Yeah.

You have to think about it.

No, but see, like, it's nice.

Michael Strahan like keeps things.

Like, I don't have anything.

Yeah.

I'm trying to think, like, any awards.

You could bring your,

you won that gift of life award.

I could also bring my shorty award.

I once once won from a fan number one Aunt Sneeches Award.

And she made Jackie like a full-blown, oh fuck, I forgot to bring you something.

I was wondering if the gifts were starting up again from your tour.

I got a bunch of gifts on tour, which I loved, but someone came to a show and she was like, this is my Aunt Sue.

And Aunt Sue was...

So fucking cute.

And she was like, I'm the oldest person here.

I'm like, literally every person over the age of 30 says that.

Like, you're not the oldest person here.

She's like, well, I'm a librarian and I have a gift for Jackie.

And it was so cute.

She gave me this envelope.

And I did like rifle through it before I threw it in my suitcase.

Um, and she told me she had a book, a list of books that she thinks you would like during the rest of your pregnancy, and just like for the future, because she feels like you guys have really similar

just vibes when it comes to reading.

And then a little baby gift that was a little bib.

It was so cute.

I have it at the house.

I'll bring it for you tomorrow.

You told me about Ansu when you were on the road, and I'm so excited for her.

That was so, it was such a thoughtful gift.

I was like going to cry.

That's Claudia, that's so beautiful.

I know.

Wow.

And so, any other gifts that you got this weekend that you would bring to space?

You know, I I get a lot of custom tumblers.

Like, you know, we have this one at shopmorningtoust.com.

And the girls got a drink.

And someone gave me like Theo's mom, Theo's dad, really cute.

I have a lot of cups.

You could bring a lock of Theo's hair to space.

Oh.

Well, Theo weighs about 20 pounds.

You could go on a strict diet.

Here's the thing.

If I lost 20 pounds, do you think they would let me bring Theo to space?

That's so interesting.

I wouldn't give up part of yourself for Dew.

I mean, Dew is definitely worth my FUPA.

Dew probably weighs the same amount amount as my fupa

yeah no it's so interesting it makes you think like it made a piece of jewelry yeah it makes you think but i also can't believe michael strahan's going to space in a few days and then he's gonna come back having been a spaceman which one is he going with

blue origin is that jeff i think that's jeff i think it's jeff too i had just recently heard about this and i thought it was very cool you know it's so funny michael strahan is just like the most popular guy like loved no like anytime there's like an opportunity like whether it's television space they're like who's someone that everyone likes?

And it's like Michael Strand.

You know, he must be just like a lovely guy personally because people just want to give him these opportunities, you know?

Mm-hmm.

He must be just like nice.

Yeah, and I'm sure he's a pleasure to go to space with.

He's a pleasure.

So,

and maybe this will be a trend of like other celebs.

Is he doing the one like the 25-minute?

Yeah, I mean, I don't think he's moving up there.

I think it will just be like a popping in and out, say you've been to space.

That's cool.

He must be so nervous.

I mean, yeah.

What kind of prep you think you have to do, like, for your body?

I think a lot.

I watched a trailer for a space documentary and there's a lot of things.

Oh a trailer.

Wow.

Yeah, just a trailer and it just taught me that there's a lot that goes into going to space.

Yeah.

And you have to learn.

Well, I mean, if it's the 25-minute ride, probably

he could hold his bladder.

Yeah.

You do have to learn how to like pee and poop in space and all these things.

Pooping in space must be so weird.

Like the second the poop comes out of your butt, like it goes floating above your head.

So you have to, I think you have to poop into like a cylinder.

A tube or a bag or something.

Smelly.

Stressful.

Yeah.

Being an astronaut's like all funning games until you have to take a dump.

Oh, I know, like being an astronaut's all funning games until you get your period.

Yeah, and I think also for women, it's much harder to pee in space than it is for men.

Oh, a hundred times.

Just like on a road trip.

Any road trip.

Just like literally life

day to day.

Yeah.

You know, there's a lot of personal hygiene things I don't think I can get on board with.

How do you put a tampon in space without it like floating away?

Yeah, I think maybe if you're on your period, you can go.

Which is just like misogynistic.

Yeah, or you could, as part of space prep, like, you know, get on some sort of cycle.

No, there's like a, there's a thing on TikTok.

Remember when NASA sent a woman to space for only six days with 100 tampons?

They sent a woman to space with 100 tampons for six days.

I have to be honest, like, that's a little extreme, but like, that's what I would need if I was going to space on my period.

No, I would be so uncomfortable with every time I put in a tampon.

It's like, oh, got to take it out, put in another one.

Yeah, no, because it's constantly defying gravity.

And you know what?

Does your period flow down if you're in space?

That's true, maybe.

You feel like it would come out your throat.

Because of gravity.

Oh, my God.

That's disgusting.

I'm crying.

It's something to think about.

We need to have a space, a female space expert.

We really do to ask these type of questions.

Yes.

But it's very much a thing.

I think people have asked these questions because I've seen like, you know, things that are fun facts.

I'm fun facts about women in space, but you could also, you know, like get on birth control or something and make sure that

you're not going to have your period in space.

Yes.

No, it's just like there's too many.

I have too many bodily issues to really take the chance and go to space.

Like what if I react weird to some space food and like have diarrhea, you know?

Yeah.

I just am not comfortable with that.

And then you're like with other people in the space.

Well, I'm sure you have to train your body to space food before you go.

Right, right.

You know, they think about those things.

Yeah, that's true.

So,

yeah.

Interesting.

Are we ready for our fifth and final story?

It's the final story.

Justice for the female astronauts who laid out their mouth!

Are you okay?

Who bleed out their mouth.

It's gravity.

It's a beautiful thing.

Okay, Tayshia Adams broke her silence on her split with Zach on the mentel all stage last night.

She said, quote, I'm heartbroken.

So Tayshia spoke out after calling off her engagement to fiancé Zach Clark nearly one year after the proposal between the two of them aired.

So, Caitlin noted that Tayshia wasn't wearing her engagement ring.

Tayshia said, Quote, all I have to say is that I'm heartbroken, but we really tried hard and I still love him very much.

And I'm not sure what the future holds.

You know how it is.

It's really tough.

Caitlin responded, I sadly do know how it is.

It's really hard, but we're here for you and obviously want you to be happy.

Then Taysa walked off while they brought on one of the suitors.

She just like needed a minute.

And then she came back and joined the show because they are the hosts.

This is their final time, right?

I didn't even put together that

we were going to see her and she was going to have to address them.

Me too, because I'm so like not in on what's going on in Bachelor Nation.

I just love Tayshia.

I don't know what happened in the relationship, but I'm 100% on her side.

And

yeah, this is sad, but like.

I just want her to get over it so we can start like shipping her with other people.

Yeah, I think it's going to take some time.

And I'm sure like having to go on live TV like to be able to.

It's like annoying to talk about it when you're probably not even ready.

Yeah, and I don't know what, and it also feels like maybe this is just me being hopeful, but like, maybe they could get back together.

You never,

we don't know what happened between them.

So maybe it's just like things weren't working.

They needed a break.

Yeah, that's possible.

But just like Little Mix, sometimes a break is not good.

Yeah, but also sometimes if you're announcing your break, like that's

the final.

Right.

I think that if you were really just actually taking like a month off from each other just to see where you land, you wouldn't make the full announcement and stop running your engagement ring.

Not when so many people have so much invested in your relationship or your band.

Right.

Or your band.

So just love to Tayshia.

Die for her.

Yeah.

Hope she's doing well.

I'm sure she is.

Me as well.

And if you want more Bachelorette content, head over to The Snatcher.

She has a new episode of The Snatchelerette mental all up now.

And you get to catch up with The Snitch, which is such a fun thing to do.

It's so exciting.

The Life of Snitch.

The Life of Snitch.

That would be her reality show name.

Yeah.

And then everyone would be tweeting about it.

T-L-O-S.

T-Las.

And Log.

Okay, well, those were the fast five, and I definitely feel as though you needed to know them.

I agree.

I feel like you guys are in a good spot.

I feel satiated.

But the show's not over because it's Tuesday, and that means it's Deer Toasters, which is our advice segment.

So if you ever want to write into us, it's deartoasters at gmail.com.

Let us know what's going on.

You can keep it anonymous.

We will protect your identity at all costs.

And also, if you've written into us recently and we've...

given you some wise sage advice, did you go with it?

Did you not go with it?

And give us an update.

We got to hear from you.

So the Deer Toaster segment is brought to you by Skylight Frame, which people have been messaging me non-stop asking for the code.

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All right.

Dear toasters.

Dear Claudia, Jackie, Theo, Little Bibbbit, and Bruno.

Long time listener, first time writing in.

I'm writing in for my friend who's about to get married in eight months.

She's having a quick engagement because her fiancé has a job where he's gone for weeks at a time.

I don't think eight months is a quick engagement.

Me, neither.

I think it's a perfect amount of time.

She asked one of her friends to be maid of honor.

I'm a bridesmaid, but her friend currently lives in New York City and we live in the south where the wedding is.

This has caused some logistic issues for planning wedding stuff already.

Even worse, she hasn't been available to help my friend plan her wedding because she has a really busy job.

Two of the bridesmaids are lawyers, including myself, and we all have busy jobs.

So that's annoying to me.

My friend has been relying on the other bridesmaids who live in the same city to help her plan everything.

My friend's fiancé is out of town for her job.

And she feels like she has to plan this wedding on her own, and her maid of honor has essentially left her high and dry.

I think my friend finally hit her breaking point with her maid of honor when she complained about having to share an Airbnb house with eight bedrooms with the bridal party after my friend had already paid for it because she didn't want to have to share space for two nights with the wedding party.

She also said she couldn't have the bacherette party on one weekend.

We can all go because it's the weekend after her boyfriend's birthday and they might go somewhere.

She hasn't taken any steps to plan the bachelorete either or connect to the bridesmaids so we can help plan.

My friend is now regretting making her her maid of honor.

Should she say something or should she just preserve the friendship and let it go until after the wedding?

Okay, so I'm like feeling

like are we responding to the bride right now or to the bride's friend?

We're responding to the bride's friend who is not the maid of honor, but who's like acting like the maid of honor because the maid of honor.

No, no, I know, but I feel like this is an issue that the bride should be having not she wants to know what advice should i give the bride right basically we are the vessel in which is the bride asking for advice like i feel like it doesn't seem like she is no i feel like maybe she is like i do feel like by the end she said

should she say something so yeah i guess i'm gonna go with the fact that like you told her you know what we're having this issue i'm gonna write into my favorite podcast they're gonna tell us what to do a hundred percent fire the maid of honor but not like just be like you obviously seem so busy i don't want to be more stressed on your already busy life i'm just gonna have someone else be the maid of honor I love you no no shade I'm being just it'll be better for both of us 100% and maybe don't even have someone else be the maid of honor maybe go no maid of honor because otherwise like that could cause friction and also then you're like promoting it's just like becomes a bit of insighting so maybe just be like listen I I didn't realize what the role entailed and I think I'm putting too much on your plate when I can handle it and some of the girls down south can handle it too.

So you are relieved of your duties.

Like I love you.

Do not worry about it.

I'm i'm not mad i'm not mad like oh but this is off your plate and just act like you're doing her favor on you act like you're doing her favor yeah that's a really good idea act like she asked and then like the the friends who live down by you who have been like going out of their way to try and plan

you do you don't have to make them the maid of honor just be like i'm now bestowing these responsibilities onto you because these girls seem eager to help like the girl who wrote in no and neither of us had maid of honors and Everyone like pitched in with their, you know, specialty.

I don't know, but like weddings in the South are like very traditional.

And a maid of of honor is like an important task like you hold the rings i don't know what you do but no but it's like an important thing but in terms of like planning the bachelorette party and stuff but i think it's like you need someone like in name to have that title

i i don't think that you do i think that this is something that you can part with me too it's like a little immature yeah

like you tried it didn't work out no need to like cause political infighting with the other bridesmaids just to have a maid of honor to say that you had a maid of honor yeah and you know what?

This is when it's like just so easy to have a sister because obviously, even if you have the best friend in the whole world, your maid of honor is always gonna be your sister.

So, like, it's like a scapegoat.

Yeah, I agree.

So, and then also, I think that the bride is gonna have to pick up some of the slack.

But I don't think that's a bad thing.

No one's gonna be as invested in your bachelorette party as you.

Like, I feel like for our bachelorette parties, we did prime, like, we planned, like, the, I remember doing, like, finding everyone's schedule because, like, also, I'm close with everyone who's coming.

But you're the center of the group.

Right.

So, and then we can do it.

We can go exactly where I want to go.

And then everybody, you know, brings the shirts and brings the merch and like brings the energy vibes.

And that worked.

And I think it makes it a little bit less painful for everyone.

Like, and less.

And painful for you.

Like, no one knows what you want for your bachelorette party better than you.

Yeah.

And when other people have to not only like pay for the trip and go on the trip and spend the time, but they also have to like plan it and maybe they get it wrong.

Like, I think you can alleviate everyone's burden and get the exact trip that you're looking for.

I agree.

I think it's all good.

Me too.

Don't sweat it.

Don't sweat it.

It's really not a big deal.

Yeah.

And you're the bride, so everyone has to be nice to you.

100%.

It sounds like you have good friends who are writing into a great podcast on your behalf.

I'm not worried about it.

Friends with taste.

Friends with taste.

All right, next up.

Hey, Claudia and Jackie, longtime listener and lover of the podcast.

So, my question/slash/issue is: one of my best friends has these parties for the holidays: Memorial Day, Labor Day, New Year's, et cetera.

And each time she hosts a party, she puts out a jar requesting donations for the food that she provided at the party, which is like hamburgers, hot dogs, chips, pasta salad, nothing so crazy.

Her and her husband also request it to be B-Y-O-B.

Also, we're in our early 30s and they both have pretty well-paying jobs.

Usually no one puts any money into the jar and she gets really upset.

Should I tell her that no one contributes anything because it's fucking tacky as hell?

Or should I just say nothing?

Any thoughts and opinions would be great.

Love you guys.

You make my day better by doing what you do.

And congratulations, Jackie.

I'm about to have my first baby girl in a few weeks.

Sincerely, an anti-contribution party goer.

That is wild.

When you first started sharing this, I was like, wow, how cool to be the girl who always has a party like you do.

And how nice to be a friend of that girl who always has something to do with later

with the mostest this is the hostess with the leastest like i just want to say there are two very different things this tip jar is so insane i think by ob actually is a nice thing like you're alleviating something for the host alcohol is expensive if everyone just brings one bottle i don't think that's a big deal i don't think i have a party i ask everyone i'm like please bring a bottle of tequila i'm never gonna have and it's like i will have some for sure but bring more i don't want to have to like buy a million cases and then like people might not drink it yep and also bring what you like i like a little byob me too but you can also like have nothing no you gotta have like the base but in the hopes that pretty much everyone brings a bottle of whatever they're gonna drink so that you know exactly that everyone's covered with what they want yeah I think that's totally fair and actually a better way to throw a party especially at this age like everyone can afford I've never heard at a tip jar a contribution jar for a party to help offset the cost because it's like then don't have a party.

That's awful.

I'm sorry.

Like, that's really bad.

No one's like asking you to have a party.

And if you can't swing it, then that's totally fine.

No, I've never heard of that.

I've never heard of that.

I don't know that I would say something because, like, it takes a big set of balls to put out a jar like that.

Yeah.

And I don't think it's something that she hasn't thought through and felt like she wanted to be that person.

Well, she made that decision and she has to sleep at night.

Just make sure that no one is contributing.

Please don't ever feel compelled to contribute.

Yeah, and you don't have to say anything.

Like, you know, just reap all the benefits.

You now have a party to go to every New Year's, every Labor Day.

It's nice.

And maybe, maybe, you know, in a few years of no contribution, she'll get the message.

Right, right.

The silence will be deafening.

That's insane.

That's a really kind of bizarre.

I've never heard of that.

I've never heard of that because don't throw a party

if you don't.

Like, when you throw a party and you're like a host, you're really doing it for the love of the people.

You want them to all enjoy themselves.

Not

for any sort of like financial reason.

Because

if you need financial help, then then you shouldn't be throwing the party, or you throw whatever party is within your means.

There's all different kinds of parties, right?

So, I'm just and I, and you know what?

If you're throwing a party and you want to offset some of the costs, like you can do like a potluck, like there are ways to be like tacky without being so tacky, like, there are ways to just take things off your plate.

Like, oh, can someone bring dessert?

Yeah, oh, I've got everything covered, but someone can just pick up some sodas.

Like, there are ways the tip jar is just like kind of obvious and tacky.

Yeah, no, it's like we're all doing you a favor by coming.

Nah, I'm good.

And now, yeah, very bizarre.

And then it's like, if everyone starts paying for the parties that they go to, then the next person who has a party should get,

you have to pay them.

No.

And then if people start paying for the parties they go to, it's like, well, I don't want hot dogs.

I want macaroni and cheese.

100%.

So it's just a slippery slope.

Do not put anything in the tip chart, but also don't say anything.

Just let her like embarrass herself in her own way, okay?

Here's the final one.

Yeah.

Hello, ladies.

First of all, I listen to the podcast every day and I love you guys.

Jackie, congratulations on your pregnancy.

Being a mama is so special.

Thank you.

I gave birth to a precious little girl in September and as a push present, my husband is having a band made with sapphires, her birthstone.

I was so excited about this super sentimental gift and so I sent a picture to my mom of the rendering of what my new wedding stack would look like.

Fast forward to today, we were talking about what everyone wants for Christmas and my mom says that she's asked to have a band made with blue stones to go with her wedding bands.

I literally thought it was a joke.

I have a great relationship with my mom and she's an amazing grandmother.

She's always copied things I've done, like wearing some of my clothes from high school, buying the same running shoes, having the same home decor, buying the same designer purses that I have, and she even copied my perfume last year.

I've always thought it was a little cute, but a little annoying, so I've never said anything besides little comments here and there.

But now, I can't help but feel like copying this is a step too far.

I tried to give her ideas of other ways she can celebrate her grandkids with a pendant, bracelets, even different kinds of ring, but after 30 minutes of trying, she gently talk her into something different.

She said she really wanted the ring and my dad was going to get it for her.

I really want this to be my special thing and having her matching one with, having her have a matching one will really bother me.

I don't want to be a bratty daughter who bitches at her mom for copying her but what do i do it's kind of weird so funny i think it's kind of cute yeah it's not like that big of a deal i know and but and it's i feel like this toaster like is has a good attitude about it in general because it's clearly like a theme a thing but this is just one thing that has gone too far for her and she's trying to put her foot down and it's just not working so i really don't I don't know what to tell you other than to just maybe be honest about your feelings, not like maybe a pendant, maybe just be like, listen, this is something that like I want just for myself.

Like I love when we twin, but I just want this one thing.

Yeah, you have to go be mine.

You have to either go all the way, like just ignore it or be communicative.

You can't be like murky in the middle.

Yeah, no, and like just be honest about your feeling as opposed to like trying to dupe her into wanting something else.

But also no, it seems like your mom loves you so much.

Like when you, if you do communicate it with her, like she'll be really hurt.

So just think, is it worth it?

Because this is not an ill-intended thing.

It's very sweet.

Yeah.

It's overstepping boundaries, but it's really sweet.

It is.

It is sweet.

And also, then I don't want her to get the wrong idea, like, that she can never copy you again, like on the running shoes and stuff.

It's cute.

It's so cute.

And it doesn't seem like it bothers you at all.

Like, I just can't relate because nothing I do or any of the ideas that I have are like creative enough or cool enough for people to copy.

Like, I'm always copying you.

I'm always copying other people.

So I think that if someone did this for me, like, I would be so unbelievably flattered that they like liked something that I came up with.

So I can't relate to it, but I can see how it's annoying.

I agree.

It just, it really for me would depend on who's copying me.

Like,

if it's someone, yes, but like, if it's someone that, like, I love so much, like anyone in the family, and they were copying me, I'd be like, so flattered.

Yeah.

Truly, sincere as form fattery.

But if it was someone who, like,

stop copying me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, like, some people just like, get under your skin.

Yeah, no.

And it's like, especially when people.

It, yeah, it just depends on the person, but it seems like in most respects here, like, it's, it's a really sweet thing.

But I understand wanting this one, you're allowed to, like, you know, have your boundaries.

I would just try being honest.

Yeah, and then let us know how that goes.

Yeah.

Honesty is the best policy.

For the most part.

Depends on the deer toasters.

Thank you guys for writing in.

Again, if you have written in to us recently and you have some sort of update for us on how the situation unfolded, if you took our advice, we would absolutely love to hear from you.

Send that to deartoasters at gmail.com and any other issues you want us to read.

That's every Tuesday, deartoasters at gmail.com.

And that is our show.

Our show.

No one else

could be confusing.

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