S4 Ep196: It's Giving Ramona: Tuesday, November 9th, 2021

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Hey, Zach!

Are you smiling at my gorgeous canyon view?

No, Donald.

I'm smiling because I've got something I want to tell the whole world.

Well, do it.

Shout it out.

T-Mobile's got home internet.

Minutes!

Whoa, I love that echo.

T-Mobile's got home internet!

How much is that?

Look at that, Zach.

We got the neighbor's attention.

Just 35 bucks a month.

And you love a great deal, Denise.

Plus, they've got a five-year price guarantee.

That's five whole trips around the sun.

I'm switching!

It's crazy!

Yes, T-Mobile home internet for the neighborhood.

McDonald's, you still haven't returned my weed whacker.

Carl, don't you embarrass me like this, please?

What's everyone yelling about?

T-Mobile's got home internet!

McDonald's got my weed whacker!

Yes, Yes, T-Mobile's got home internet.

Just $35 a month with autopay and any voice line, and it's guaranteed for five years.

Beautiful yodeling, Carl.

Taxes of these apply.

T-Mobile.com slash ISP for details and exclusions.

Good morning, Millennials.

Welcome back to the Morning Toast.

Happy Tuesday.

Hello, Jax.

How you doing?

I'm doing pretty well for a beautiful Tuesday here in New York City, and it's Fendi Skim's launch day, so I've been

up in Adam since early this morning, waiting with bated breath to see what I could snag.

And I got pretty much what I wanted.

Good

chat.

Yeah, no, I got some stuff too.

I'm not going to lie.

I was a little

jilted.

Is that the right word?

By the prices.

Yes, but had you not

seen them before?

No, no, did you?

Yeah.

Oh, no, I didn't see.

And it was just like $2,900 for a jacket.

Like, hello.

The puffer.

The puffer.

So I didn't get exactly what I wanted because I'm a reasonable human being, but I still did get stuff.

And you know what's so great is that you you can return it.

I didn't realize that before I checked out that you can return stuff.

I would have bought even more.

See if I liked it.

I didn't realize that either, but now I had a pit about spending so much money before 9 a.m.

Same.

I actually took something out of my cart, and now I'm a fool.

Yeah,

everything's sold out.

It's all gonna be marked up.

It was an investment.

I played the stock market this morning, and I just didn't have the heart for it.

Yeah, no, and it's like I can't imagine that, like, if I get something and I don't end up wearing it and the tags are still on it, like, it has a decent value, right?

Yeah, stock X, here I come.

I think so.

Yeah, I don't know if like skims like cheapens the Fendi brand or it elevates Fendendra.

I think the fact that it is a limited edition thing.

I mean, Fendi puts out clothes all the time.

They don't have a drop that sells out in 10 minutes.

Literally, everything was like just flying off the shelves if you were online.

Hope you guys got what you wanted, but it was really crazy to see.

I imagine that the Fendi team is like, whoa, blown away.

Yeah, they don't sell like this because it's just so expensive.

And the fact that it's so expensive, I thought we would have at least 30 minutes.

Like, I didn't think we would have like classic Kylie Lipkit numbers.

Yeah, no, I was kind of taking my time.

Me too.

And I missed out on one thing that was in my cart that dropped out of my cart that I was excited about because it would have looked cute.

It was hard to do the shop pregnant because I wanted to get stuff that I could wear now.

No.

It's all so tight and like body con.

I know, so I just.

I like ordered a size up and everything.

It'll fit me when I'm not pregnant.

Hopefully it fits me when I'm pregnant.

Yeah, no, it's very exciting.

Congrats to Kim.

Congrats to us for securing the things we needed to secure.

And it's just a gorgeous day.

It's Tuesday.

We have dear toasters for you guys today, which is a personal favorite of mine and millions of toasters.

And yeah, how are you doing?

I'm doing well, you know, just chilling.

It's been a nice week.

I feel like yesterday I got, so I finished a book, watched a lot of TV, started a new book, spent quality time with Brusseldorf.

So important.

So it was just a really well-rounded day.

Still enjoying all of my post-birthday sweets and treats.

I'm so jealous.

I got to come over.

You do.

I have everything.

I have like nothing in my home.

It's like I have to make a concerted effort to eat vegetables and healthy foods because I have so many sweet treats.

You're not going to poop.

That's true.

I'm pretty, that's like not an issue for me.

You're pretty regular?

Yeah, I don't have to think about it.

Like my body does what it needs to do.

And if it's been a few days, I don't even realize, you know?

Yeah.

Totally.

Right?

You don't have poop issues.

No, I really don't.

But Margot Ashre once told me that like she poops every morning, like the second she wakes up.

And I'm like, that's psychotic.

That's like a really intimate detail.

But can I tell tell you that it's been happening to me recently and it's a delight?

Like a great way to just like drop off the kids before you wake up?

That's really

now we're just getting to a place.

So let us know where you'd like to come in the morning.

I would like to come back from this conversation.

Okay, well, we both watched Curb Your Enthusiasm.

We did, which, by the way, I feel like calling it Curb Your Enthusiasm is like so weird because it's called Curb.

Sure.

No, like I've never, like, I just feel weird saying curb your enthusiasm.

It's like not the name of the show.

Okay, so say curb.

Yeah, I was just pointing out that I said it weird.

Okay.

And I thought it was good.

I thought it was so good.

It was like giving me old school curb vibes and the quandaries that Larry found himself in were very real.

The middling in the table was hysterical.

Yes, and it's a really, really true point.

Like only true

charismatic gals, such as ourselves, can really sit in the middle of a dinner party, at a dinner table, of a dinner party.

I don't go to that many dinner parties where it's like a mixture of people where the conversation needs to be finessed like that.

So I actually don't know if I'm the girl to middle.

I don't think I am.

I think I'm, you know, a side just chiming in, but I'm not the person that's gonna like conduct conversation.

Well, the thing is, like, I am a great middle,

but I don't want to be.

Do you know what I mean?

So like, I could see a dinner party that I could like finesse fabulously and sit in the middle, but like, I will be selfish and take my talents to the corner.

Yeah, just because I want to do it on my terms.

I'm not working here tonight, you know, but I could do it if I needed to.

Like, that's what we do on the the show We make conversation We have thought-provoking discussions I have it in me.

That's just not what I want to do in my spare time 100% You know 100%

But would you rather than have someone else in the middle and then you're at a boring dinner party right knowing that you have so much to give and that you could spice this thing up.

Yeah, and then you're just a like these are the consequences of your own actions at that point like you did middle and now you're paying the price.

Yeah So it's it's tough.

You get in what you put out.

And it was a good episode.

Like I've, I've felt like the first two episodes of the season were actually some of the worst ever.

And this one was good.

Like, I chuckled a bunch.

Me too.

I chuckled a bunch, and the setups were good.

There weren't too many things happening.

Yeah.

All good.

I'm feeling good.

Yeah, I just,

I'm still, like, yearning for a curb that

commentates on like what's currently going on in the world or what was going on in the world when they were filming.

And like, so as good as this episode could have been, like, it's not what it needed to be still.

Understood, but we're going to have to change level setup.

I just keep like waiting for like the other shoe to drop.

Yeah, It's over.

It's over.

Yeah.

No, it's not happening.

That's crazy to me.

Yeah.

Devastating.

Devastating.

I also, so I was reading this book called The Last Thing He Told Me by Laura Dave.

I think it was Arees's book club choice.

I just finished it yesterday and it was pretty good in case anybody was thinking about reading it.

It's like everywhere.

You know, it's like a super popular book, but it just wasn't, it didn't do much for me, but it was a pleasant read.

Like I was.

hopping along.

And then I started

a new book that actually Lauren Bostick recommended to us when we were on her podcast, Good Morning Monster.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And so it's nonfiction and it's about a thing.

Nonfiction is not real.

Non-fiction is real.

I'll never understand.

Okay.

Fiction is like, you know, novel

made up.

I'm literally a New York Times best-selling author and like I can't figure it out.

I don't even know when I tried to find myself on the New York Times best-selling list.

Like, I didn't know which list I was, like, non-fiction or fiction.

You're non-fiction.

Mostly what we read is fiction.

Colleen Hoover's.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like fake stories.

So I have had this like wanting to read for a while.

I just like, was like, this is an interesting choice.

It's a therapist who's sharing the stories of five of the most memorable patients she ever had.

So, last night I finished the first patient, and it's a great story.

It's like really getting me into like a psycho

therapist analysis vibe, but it's good.

It's definitely expanding my mind.

That's good.

Yeah, so it was a good recommendation.

Speaking of Rhys's book club, yesterday I actually found myself on like a rabbit hole of Rhys Witherspoon's Instagram, and I guess it just like never occurred to me like how rich she is.

Like she does the most.

First of all, just being like Reese Witherspoon, all the movies, all the TV shows, the morning show, her best work is like these days.

Like she's not even close to being done, big little eyes.

But then there's Reese's book club, which like has so many followers.

I was just like looking into it because I think I was looking at the Redheads.

Remember, I was telling you how the Red Heads Instagram was so impressive.

So I went on like a book club rabbit hole.

And then I got to Reese and then I got to her Draper James.

Like she's just busy and rich.

And Hello Sunshine.

Hello Sunshine is probably the biggest of them all.

And that's the one that was like Blackstone just,

which one of her projects just literally got valued at a billion dollars or got purchased for a billion dollars?

Hello, Sunshine.

Probably.

That's like the umbrella, right?

It is.

And I think it's also the biggest endeavor of hers.

It's like the TV Network.

Morning Show is Hello Sunshine.

Little Fires Everywhere was Hello Sunshine.

So like she teaches

these books and then she makes them into shows.

No, it's synergy.

It's really so smart.

And she's so good at it.

And she's really cornered the market on books.

And it's like she's done this huge business empire thing But she's also still acting in some of the best work most critically acclaimed still being nominated for awards like but it's also like the things that she's working on in and on are Hello Central

So it's just all going back in Terese's pocket synergy.

It's it's honestly brilliant.

Yeah, no, she's She's doing her thing.

And then there's the draper dreams of it all which personally isn't for me, but people are obsessed.

It's like a southern vibe clothing line.

Yeah, not for I've never shopped it.

Me neither.

Good for Reese.

No, it was just like crazy.

Like, she's like one of the richest celebrities, like, and she's just, like, so underrated.

No, and she's so influential.

Yes, like, if she puts her thing on your book, it's like over for you.

Oh, that for sure.

But, like, she

like must be so nice to like pick up a book, be like, this would make a great movie and go make it.

No, and then, like, it'd actually be good.

Yeah, and she's also doing where the crawdad sing movie.

Of course, she is.

And that is just like the biggest book of the last three years.

It's crazy.

Girl, second biggest

second biggest book.

Thank you so much.

Available at girlwithnojob.com/slash book.

Also, if you head over to that website, you get tickets to my tour.

It's like low-key really soon.

And like, I've had like consistent nightmares about it for like the past two weeks.

That's how I know it's getting really close.

Also, you just like

popped up one day and added a show in New York City.

Didn't tell your sisters, didn't tell anyone.

Also, I added two shows in New York.

I like to get started in New York.

I'm doing them at City Winery.

I really opened it up only to the Patreon members

because I like to warm up in front of a small crowd, in front of like people.

Like the Patreon members are just like my family.

So like it'll be, it's basically a friends and family show.

They're two really small shows.

They're only about 100 people each

at City Winery at the end of this month.

Like they're really soon.

When I saw, first of all, I didn't know about it until they sold out and people were like, can someone sell me your New York City tickets?

I was like, girl, where have you been?

There is no New York City show.

I'm like, where have I been?

Then I was like, oh, she finally added New York.

I guess that's like.

at the end of the tour.

So I was like, maybe it's 2022.

And then I realized, no, no, no, it's in two weeks.

Yeah.

No, it's not like, it's really just

to get comfortable.

I understand.

I'm so excited for you.

I understand what it is now.

I just had no idea.

Do you want to know why?

You're just like dropping, dropping, dropping.

Do you want to know why?

Like, I feel like in the past and like up until recently, like, every time I farted, I would like put it in our group chat.

Yes.

And I just feel like people were getting annoyed with my updates.

So I just stopped, you know?

Okay.

So here, like, why does it have to be all or nothing?

It's not like every fart or no updates.

No, now I I feel like I'm putting in like just like the sharts.

Okay.

Like the major life-changing farts, not like the, I'm doing a 100-person show.

Like, no one cares.

No, but we care because it's New York.

But like, you'll be.

But, like, here's the thing.

Just, it's okay.

You can share.

No, no, no.

It's fine.

I'll stop bothering everyone with my major success.

Like, it's definitely annoying.

I can totally understand.

So then don't come at me.

Like, you didn't tell me.

Like, sorry, you were not loving like the updates when I was giving them.

So I just stopped giving them.

Who came at you?

Was that meant towards me?

You right now.

No, I was just explaining the journey that I went on, and I was excited for you.

I was explaining how I've been, you know, put down by my family.

You know, it was just like a small thing.

It's going to be fun and light and fun.

And City Winery.

I've actually never been to.

Oh, actually, we have.

Were you there?

Yes.

I wasn't there when you were there, but I've been there.

Gorgeous venue.

Waterfront.

Waterfront.

It's going to be so intimate.

I made the room really small.

I just wanted to

go through my material, launch a show in like a warm

space.

Yeah, temperature.

Practice some new jokes, and it's going to be super fun.

That's awesome.

I'm happy for everyone who got tickets.

Um, it was just a surprise for all of us, I guess.

Well, don't worry, like, I care about you, so I got you a ticket.

We were all really surprised.

No, for sure.

I guess I really did forget to tell you guys, but like, it was in my mind, just like not important.

No, I like I forget to tell people important stuff all the time.

Yeah, don't hold it against me.

It happens to me in Ben all the time.

It happens to me in Zach.

That's what I'm talking about.

I think it's because, like, you're like my husband in a lot of ways.

Like, and so I don't know, like, something major will happen, And I'll let, I'll literally guess, I bet.

I'm like, no, I told you.

No, this is why we don't tell our husbands that.

And I've thought about it, but it's hard.

They still, Zach won't accept this answer.

But when I first hear about something that would be like an amazing opportunity for us, when it first comes across my desk, I'm not telling anyone.

We're not telling people about it because it hasn't happened yet.

So then by the time it actually is happening,

you forgot.

It's not new to us.

It's not like, oh, I need to tell you this thing.

But if I told you about every maybe exciting thing that happened, you'd be disappointed as often as I am.

So also you can't tell someone something exciting and big before it happens because otherwise you'll jinx it.

Jackie, that's a brilliant assessment.

So by the time it happens, it's old news to me.

Right.

No, that's true.

So that's why you don't tell him.

I forget to tell Ben's like major things all the time.

Or like if I'm going somewhere, like literally I'll be on my way to the airport.

He'll be like, where are you going?

I'm like, I told you I'm going to Coachella.

Like, you know?

Oh, that's a little crazy.

No, I know.

But no, that's the reason why.

Yeah, that's okay.

There's never a moment where it's like, okay, it's safe to tell people and this is still new to us.

Yeah.

So true.

It's like, where have you been?

That was six months ago.

We found out.

Keep up.

So yeah, tour kicks off soon.

Tickets available at girlhnod.com slash tour.

I have to say, pretty much all my shows are like sold out or like they're eight months away and like they will be sold out except for Detroit.

So I just really need the Detroit Toasters.

I chose Detroit, hand-picked Detroit, because the last time I was there, they put me at this enormous venue and I'm like, guys, what are you doing?

They're like, just trust trust us.

And I did trust them, and it sold out immediately.

It was one of my biggest shows on the last tour, which is so random.

So I'm like, I've got to show love to my Detroit stars.

Detroit stars.

That's good.

And literally, like, I need you guys to sell the show out or just like buy some tickets, okay?

Detroit.

If you haven't gotten a ticket to a tour and like you want to see some friends, maybe like a weekend in Detroit.

Make it a weekend.

You know, the last time I was in Detroit, I stayed at this sickening casino called Motor City Casino.

It's like a gorgeous affair.

Like, spend the weekend there.

Cool.

That sounds fun.

But other than that, I'm all set.

I'm all set.

We can jump right in.

We have some good stories today.

We have dear toasters.

So let's just, without further ado, head into the fast-five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

I just want to say we're like now at that period in life where it's fucking hot in a studio because it's like cold outside, so the heat is not in here.

And I'm going to be start showing up in t-shirts and I don't want to hear from anyone, okay?

Okay, just want to let you know the heat is not on.

It is so fucking hot in here.

I felt this way yesterday.

I think what it is, is it's nice outside.

It's like 50 degrees, according to Weather Smitch.

There's no heat or AC on.

I'm hot.

So you're just like in a room.

I'm like sticky and I'm not happy about it.

I'm sorry.

I'm actually perfectly comfortable.

But you know what I am happy about?

You look perfectly comfortable.

What's that from?

The cotton commercials, where.

Yes.

Oh my, that's such a specific reference.

I thought that was like an iconic like legally blonde moment, you know?

The cotton commercial?

Okay.

I really have been like staying at home a lot watching TV.

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Okay, our first story.

Heartbroken Kim Kardashian addresses Astro World tragedy on Instagram, as did Kendall, and there was a repost from Chloe.

Kim has weighed in on the deaths that took place at Travis Scott's Astro World concert festival on Friday.

She said, absolutely heartbroken for the lives who were lost and anyone who was hurt at Astro World.

Just like all of you, our family is in shock by the tragedy.

We are keeping all of the victims, families, and loved ones impacted in our prayers for healing, as well as Travis, who we know cares so much about his fans and is truly devastated.

So Chloe reposted that statement, and then Kendall put out a statement of her own.

As did Drake.

As did Drake, yes.

Yeah.

I find it interesting that, like, people like, and we spoke about this yesterday.

People

are really looking at the Kardashians here, like keeping a microscope on them, like, seeing what they'll do and feeling like they're partially to blame, which I just don't agree with.

Well, yeah, and I think there's a difference between like Kylie and Kendall's response because they were there versus the rest of the family was in LA celebrating Chris's birthday.

Right, and I think for a lot of people, it was in their minds, like a little out of touch for them to be like posting all these videos all weekend, like flowers while all of this was going down.

So I am glad that they released a statement, but again, it's not,

it's, I mean, it's just a sad thing that happened in general to the world.

Like, we should all be talking about it.

We should all be like thinking about it.

So, I think, like,

them releasing a statement is great.

But again, I think people are just like really wanting to hear from Kylie.

Yeah.

And I, I, this, and it, it was nice that they shared, and I'm sure it's affected their, their whole family because it's affected Kylie, and, you know, they're all one big unit.

Um,

but it, again, I mean, people who are waiting to hear from the Kardashians and like on this, it's like it's a little far removed.

Yeah, no, I think so too.

Honestly, I was curious to hear what Drake was going to say, because Drake was there, and the climax of the show was when Drake came out and Drake did release something, I think, yesterday or last night,

just kind of saying how he hates putting things on Instagram.

But like, that's the way it goes.

And he's just like praying.

And I just think,

I don't know.

I don't know where we go from here.

I don't know like where we're, who we're blaming, what's going on.

But I actually did hear something interesting.

About the whole ticket refund.

Oh, what did you hear?

And like there are people, like lawyers are warning certain people maybe not to accept the refund because if you read the terms and conditions, you're like agreeing to not litigate or not sue.

So, just like to be really careful of accepting the refund.

Oh, that's interesting.

A lot of

the concert goers have already started the lawsuit process.

There are like two big lawyers in Houston who are representing a lot of different people.

Also, I saw yesterday Travis is partnering with BetterHelp to get like mental health services for the people who

experience because, like, not only were there the physical injuries, hundreds of them, but so many people saw terrible things bodies like awful awful things and even to just that even if you didn't see that stuff and just knowing that you were at a concert where yeah it's it's very taxing it's a lot to process so he is um trying to help people get that sort of help okay i actually think that's good

um

yeah it's just like the

Like the conversations people are having and just like what's been going on.

It's really, I just can't get over how like crazy it is that this whole thing happened in general.

Yeah, and then I'm sure you saw yesterday, but one of the people who is critically injured in a coma was a nine-year-old boy.

Yes, I did.

And I saw a picture of him and he was really cute.

And it's so sad.

It's so sad.

And did they identify that person?

I didn't see it, but I...

I really hope so.

That's such a terrible way to find out that like your son or your brother passed away.

Yeah.

It's just, everything that keeps coming out about this story is more horrible than the next.

And I think just people are really angry and they're looking for a place to direct their anger.

And like I understand that, I do.

Yeah, and I think that there's a lot of places where anger needs to be directed because it's like a

it was just a storm of a lot of different ingredients that need to be looked at going forward and just as

a society.

Yeah.

You know?

It's I just like, I still can't believe that this happened.

And it's just, it's the craziest thing.

And that I know I keep saying that, but it's like the only thing.

It's just insane.

Yeah.

And I just feel really sad.

So I hope everything, I hope everyone who sues gets what they need.

Like for real.

Yeah.

Agreed.

Okay, our next story.

Switching gears.

Jeff Bezos tweets Leonardo DiCaprio, a titanic sized threat after girlfriend Lauren Sanchez swoons over the actor.

Okay, this is actually funny.

So as you guys probably saw this video, it's on our Instagram.

So go watch it if you haven't yet of Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sanchez meeting Leo at the LACMA Art and Film Gala in LA.

And Lauren is all about Leo.

Yeah, it's a really interesting video.

Just like reading the body language, it's just so interesting.

Like Leo can't get away from Lauren fast enough.

Lauren is like licking her lips, like nestling in his armpit.

It's giving Ramona.

It's giving Ramona singer.

Yes.

That's like if you guys watch Roni, like imagine

Leo is Harry Dubin.

Lauren is Ramona and it's the eyes and it's the like.

Jackie, that is so fucking true.

Liam.

Yes.

Literally.

So the internet was obviously, you know,

ablaze with this video.

Barstool posted, Leo is Mr.

Steal Your Girl.

And then Jeff Bezos wrote on Monday, he posted a picture leaning over a sign that says danger,

steep cliff, fatal drop.

And he said, Leo, come over here.

I want to show you something.

That's actually a really funny response.

That is so funny that you find it so funny.

Oh, you know what?

Like that he got to laugh out loud.

No, you.

Because, I mean, I've seen this a hundred times and like I was like, oh, he's like a weenie.

But then some way, sometimes, like the way you read it just made me laugh.

Yeah.

I mean, you know what?

Jeff Bezos, like, I don't know him at all.

No.

Like, every time,

like, every time his personality comes through, I'm just like, who is this man?

Like, what is this?

When you saw him laughing, like, before he went to space, he was like,

when he was wearing cowboy boots with his spacesuit.

Like, I just, every time he does something, it's so radically different from, like, who I thought he would be.

And this is just another iteration of that.

I love people who can laugh at themselves and who can, like, get in on the joke and are good sports.

And to me, this is like the perfect example of it.

Like, literally, his girlfriend is, like, drooling over Leonardo DiCaprio.

And like, he makes a joke about it.

Cause like, even if you're the richest man in the world, like.

Leonardo DiCaprio is Leonardo DiCaprio.

And I just thought this was like, you know what?

I actually, I really like this response.

You respect it.

I do.

Yeah, I do.

I do too.

Like, everyone was laughing at him, and everybody's laughing with him.

Yeah, because otherwise, that video was just

yikes.

Yikes, bikes.

Like, it was painful.

But knowing, like, he thinks it's funny, like, yeah, of course, like, I'm the richest man in the world, and even I can't keep a woman away from Leonardo.

Like, that's funny.

Yeah, I agree.

And I really have respect for this response.

Like, it's funny.

That's okay, cool.

Yeah.

And, like, some good news for Jeff Bezos.

When you're a billionaire, like, you don't have to respond to like moronic internet viral content culture.

But he did, and it was funny.

And and he came out on top.

Yeah.

Do you think now that I've been watching Succession and like watching Kendall Roy try and like get fire tweets out, you know, that's like part of his

strategy, like hiring all these people to write like cool takes.

Yeah.

Do you think that he had like a team of people who submitted responses to him and he chose the best one?

It's possible when you're that rich, but it's really giving me like dad humor.

Like organic.

Yeah.

Like he had the picture in his phone.

He's in like waiting to use it.

Like, because I don't think he took that picture today.

It's like from you know one of him and Lauren's trips.

Yeah,

and you know what?

This whole thing just reminded me that him and Lauren are still together.

I know.

Like they were such big news.

National Inquire, I want to get drunk with you.

Not too drunk.

Read the newspaper in the morning.

His texts were leaked.

It was so embarrassing.

And then they kind of like disappeared.

So I'm like, well, did that whole scandal break them or are they still together?

And I just never really followed up on it.

But now I know for sure that they are still together.

And I went.

This whole moment caused me to go find her Instagram.

And it's so interesting.

I've been there before.

It's so like, it's giving trophy wife.

It is, and it's amazing.

Yeah.

No, they're kind of cute.

Yeah.

I don't know.

I'm like not entirely not here for it, you know?

Yeah.

No, and the proof is in the pudding, as we always say.

It's been a long time because we reported on those texts like in the old, old studio.

Yeah.

So it's like two years at least.

And I want to get drunk with you.

But not too drunk.

Ooh, no.

No.

I just want to wake up and read the newspaper with you.

Oh, no.

Now I'm like, now that I'm like getting to know Jeff and I read those texts, it's kind of sweet.

Yeah, no, Jeff, do your thing.

Don't let the haters stop you.

Don't let the haters stop you.

Yes.

But do you also think he's like encroaching on Elon Musk's vibe a little bit of like quirky, funny guy?

No, because Elon has like a very definite like personality.

Like we know Elon 100%.

Jeff Bezos is kind of like the gift that keeps on giving.

Like we never know what we're going to get.

It's like a box of chocolates.

I feel like if it wasn't for Elon, he wouldn't lean into this side of himself.

Obviously, Elon's had so much success.

He wants to be like the affable billionaire.

Yeah, and he's not going to be because, like, we can smell his desperation from New York, but we do appreciate the effort.

Yeah, and it's they're landing.

These things are landing, so it's going well.

So now I'm thinking, like, maybe he does have a team of people writing tweets for him.

I do think that he does, and I think that he's always, you know, one step behind Elon.

Yeah.

Whereas, like, no one has the keys to Elon's Twitter.

Like, it's all Elon.

No one is giving Elon cool takes with Twitter.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Are you ready for our next story?

Yeah.

Carol Baskin says she joined.

No, no, no, but I thought this story was interesting.

Can you just

give it a minute?

Carol Baskin says she joined a secret support group for traumatized celebrities.

Oh, I haven't been invited.

Carol Baskin, who was accused in the 2020 documentary series of having murdered her husband and fed his body to exotic cats, claims that there is a secret support group for A-listers traumatized by the trials of fame.

And she said...

She's being kicked out now for telling people.

Yeah, or maybe she likes stopped attending.

She said that she was invited to join it after the Tiger King phenomenon made her into a public pariah.

She said on a podcast that as the Netflix show was becoming a smash hit and she was turning into a household name, somebody reached out to her and said, quote, I have this group of celebrities and we meet, or before COVID, we would meet.

I forget what day it was that they met each week, but they would meet once a week and they'd all get together and they'd talk about what it was like to live their lives.

She said, and I can see why now why celebrities run around in dark glasses and scarves and ducking like they're running from the law from one place to another because it's just, it's overwhelming to just be constantly surrounded by people.

She wouldn't say who the members of the group were, but she said there were 21 or 22 people and that there were only three or four people in the group that she didn't recognize.

And that was only because they were sports personalities and she's not, she doesn't keep up with athletes.

Okay, you know what?

Like this does sound like something that would exist.

I don't know if like if it's actually that cool that they actually invite Carol Baskin, but it does kind of bring something up like about Carol Baskin.

I know you didn't watch Tiger King, but like Homegirl was villainized when at the end of the day, there's literally no actual proof or evidence police-wise that she killed her husband.

And two, like at the end of the day, she was the only person in that documentary who gave a shit about the tigers.

Like she was the one running a sanctuary.

The others were the ones like keeping them in cages, like stealing their sperm to like make more.

So like low-key, we're all like Joe Exotic, haha.

Like it's actually a really unethical story.

Like Joe Exotic did not care about the animals.

Like he kept them in zoos, whereas Carol was rescuing and taking care of all the animals that these morons like Joe Exotic were doing bringing them over from like Africa so

yeah they made her into a murderer when low-key she didn't murder anyone allegedly there's no proof yeah it she could have but there's no proof but it's circumspect right so like there's no proof that she so she really did get like the short end of the stick and she like got turned into a joke like remember that prankster who like thought she was gonna she thought she was gonna be on Jimmy Fallon these youtubers pranked her into thinking like she was like a national joke I'm like I do feel bad for her when, like, low-key, she just cares about the animals.

Yeah.

So, the fact that this group could exist, like, does make sense to me.

And now I'm dying to be invited.

Yeah, like, who else do you think?

What's the criteria?

Because I'll

expose myself a little bit, like, get another cancellation just to be invited.

Yeah.

Say something crazy.

It's like, if it's A-listers, would they really reach out to like someone going through it?

I guess Tiger King was the biggest show of the year.

So that would make Carol Bastion an A-lister.

No, but it would make her like a momentary A-lister.

lester yeah and maybe like if the people in the group you know they saw what she was going through they were like let's have her in yeah that's so interesting because like the thing is when you ask pretty much anyone in hollywood i was just reading um a tweet but dakota johnson did an interview and she was asked or she spoke about how like she's worked with a lot of people who have been canceled and they were naming like army hammer and

I saw KC Affleck, I think.

Okay.

And she was just like, cancel culture, blah, blah, blah.

People in Hollywood do not subscribe to like cancellations, even though like you think that they would.

Yes, and no, because I do feel like maybe in their hearts, it's like they might not cut this person out of their life, but then they go public and they're like, I don't agree with what so-and-so did, and like they've just got to throw each other under the bus.

Yeah, like mystery just calls for.

But whenever any person in Hollywood is asked about like cancellations and just cancel culture in general, they're like vehemently against it.

Right, of course.

You won't hear anyone say, like, I am for the cancellations.

But then, like, everyone's like, I'm against cancel culture, but yeah totally but what but I would just love to know who's in this group like if it's in fact true and it is in fact a list yeah no it definitely gives you something to think about but if it's a secret society like and she's talking about on a podcast the first rule of fight club is don't talk about fight club so yeah no she probably won't be invited back yeah but though she didn't know you know

no i think she probably did but maybe she stopped going maybe she's healed yeah i hope so i really i wish healing i will pray for her i really will yeah it just makes you think about it in a different way doesn't it?

It does.

And you know what?

Like, those stupid documentaries, like, about nothing, like, they just take a side, you know?

And this documentary was like so clearly anti-Carol Baskin.

But you know what?

Carol Baskin, in my eyes, and in the eyes of the law, has done nothing wrong yet.

So let's just keep that in mind.

Thank you, Claudia.

Are you ready for our next story?

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Merry Christmas,

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Is that the Backstreet Boys?

In sync.

Yeah, same thing.

Our next story.

Fans are demanding that James Corden be kept out of the wicked movie.

Yes, I saw change.org is quaking.

Aspiring Glendas and Alphabas across the nation are putting their differences aside and joining forces to ask that James Corden be kept as far away from Oz as possible.

A change.org petition demanding that Corden be left out of Universal's wicked movie launched over the weekend and has amassed more than 34,000 signatures.

They say the request is simple.

James Corden, in no way, shape, or form, should be in or near the production of the wicked movie.

That's pretty much it.

Okay, so I feel two ways about this.

Okay, me too, because one, I saw this headline.

Funny.

Okay, I'm laughing.

Sure.

Yeah, no, and actually, like,

James Corden, like, has actually not been in a successful musical.

So, like, for the sake of the

curse, I do think he should be left out.

But it's also really mean.

It's so mean.

And, like, why does it have to be like, why does someone have to get so propped up?

We're all obsessed with James Gordon, host this, host that, being this, being that.

And then, like, we just decide that it's getting a little much for us when we're the ones who were consuming all of our exposure, cardboard, karaoke.

And then it has to be a change.org petition.

Yeah, no, this is like the cycle of like of celebrity fandom and how toxic it is.

It's giving Anne Hathaway.

It's giving Anne Hathaway 100%.

And it's just the way we treated Anne wasn't right back then.

No, you're right.

So she has fucking trauma.

We need to learn from that.

No, you're 100% right, but like also, I don't want him in the movie.

So like, what do we do about that?

No, I'm being dead serious.

Yeah.

But maybe that's just because I've been conditioned to find him annoying because like.

Partially because he is annoying and partially because like people just are like how annoying is this video of James Corden?

And I'm like, yeah, I guess it is annoying.

I I don't know.

But if you followed anyone around and like video the annoying things that they did, like, my God, anyone would become hated.

Yes, I agree.

It's just really mean.

Like, this is just like mean,

like, James's feelings.

No, and it's just we need to do better.

Like, when it's a cycle, you know, I, I, so I understand why.

James has never hurt anyone.

I understand why people wouldn't want James in the movie.

Not only do I understand, I support it.

But this is wrong.

I agree.

It's really mean.

Like, he's not a bad person.

No, he's not.

And he's just like a musical fanatic.

Yeah, and he actually is like a good singer.

But he does like really crazy stuff.

Like, no.

Now I'm thinking about like when they were promoting Cinderella.

Yes, and the video of him pumping his crotch at the car.

Yeah, I know.

I saw it.

I literally saw it yesterday on TikTok.

And I see, like, it's, but so maybe this is a moment for James to reflect and be like, okay, why am I the way that I am?

Like, there's things that are good.

Like, carpool karaoke is good.

Like, him on on that plane with Kanye, that is good.

So we need to make a pros and cons list of James's work.

Yeah.

And we need to start trimming away the things that are rubbing people's arms.

Spilling your guts is good.

Yes.

Yeah, except I actually did see there was a petition about that, too, because it's like insensitive because a lot of those are like cultural foods and like you're calling them gross.

So maybe you just need to switch up the foods.

But I think conceptually it's a good way to get celebrities to spill tea.

Yeah, I think as a late late night host, he's good.

I think his show is like popular.

Yeah.

Celebrities love him.

I would keep that in the pros column.

Ari loves him.

That's the thing.

Yeah, no, and he has access to all these celebrities because they just like love him as a person.

Him and he went on vacation with Harry Styles and Adele.

Yeah.

And everyone was tagging me.

He gave Adele a piece of gum that was chewed by Celine Diana.

Yes, he was in her 73 questions.

Yes, yes.

Okay, so those are the pros.

And I think that's really good.

And he's also good at hosting award shows.

Very good.

You know, cons.

Obviously,

stopping the music, stopping the streets.

Doing music.

And you know what?

I think I've just kind of put it together because you just made a really good point.

Like, he really thrives, and this is him as just being a good host.

He thrives in environments that are not about him.

Like, he's interviewing celebrities, he's giving other people awards.

Where it gets muddy is when he is becoming, like, the star, like in Katz.

Like,

that's where it gets difficult because he's like more of like a background,

he's perfect as a background piece.

But then when he becomes a star in certain movies and musicals, that's where it gets dicey, in my opinion.

But I just feel like Katz was doomed

with or without James Gordon.

Yeah.

People were annoyed that he was in the friends reunion, but he was actually excellent.

He didn't insert himself too much.

It was about the six characters.

I thought he was very good in that.

Yeah, and what he did in Cinderella was wrong.

I agree.

Was very wrong.

He made it all about him.

Wait, was he in Cinderella?

He was in Cinderella.

He played one of the mice that turns into a footman.

And when they became footmen, like, they literally had 10 minutes worth of scenes.

Jackie, I, of them figuring out, like, oh, how do I pee?

Jackie, this is so random, but we have to just, I have to tell you something, and then we'll go back to talking about this.

You just reminded me of it.

Okay.

You said footman.

Okay.

At the Potomac Reunion, I believe it was Ashley Darby who said, I put my foot in it.

I know.

Jackie, she quoted you via the Proud Family.

Okay, I just had to, I was wanting to.

She was quoting Sugar Mama, I believe.

I believe too.

She put her, what was she talking about?

The coffee and music video.

Yes, coffee and

was it

love?

Is that one called?

Coffee and Love, Maybe.

Yes, she put her foot in it.

Okay, thank you.

Back to James Corden.

So, yes, I did not know he was in Cinderella.

If you saw it.

I thought he was just helping her promote it in that vile way.

No, he was.

He was in it, too.

Okay.

So, yeah, I think we've actually cracked the James Corden code.

Once again, free ideas here for James Corden and his team.

I think that him wanting to go beyond his abilities, like as a host, are what's rubbing people the wrong way.

No, and like Hollywood just has this problem where like something's working.

Okay, we're going to throw it at everything.

And it's like, we are fatigued and you're ruining James Corden.

He's a talented man.

We've liked him for so long.

You've got to pull back the reins.

Jaggie, that's so true.

They literally like find something that people like, like Americans, and they just shove that person down our throats.

Right.

Megan Trainer.

Right.

And so it's got to stop, but a change.org position like is a little bit mean.

It's extremely.

It's too much.

No, and I think that like we operate in this world where like we think celebrities don't have feelings, but like what if James literally read that?

Like he did, it would hurt his feelings.

He definitely read it, yeah.

I think it's mean.

I think he may be laughed at, though.

Yeah, I don't know if he's in on the joke, he should get in on the joke.

I think that's actually would be a great way for him to get out of this rut he's currently in.

But I could see him like in on the joke and then like going home and crying himself to sleep a hundred percent.

He's a sensitive man, he's British.

Like, I completely agree.

Yeah, but I just think for his image, like if he got in on the joke and started doing like stories on late night about like the petition, like people would respect him, much like Jeff Bezos.

Yeah, he should do a story about the petition.

Um,

I just, we need to, there needs to be a line, you guys.

Yeah.

And it was crossed.

100%.

I do think.

But I fully support the message of the petition.

He could have a little part.

No, there's no such thing as a little part for James Gordon.

No, when you're James Corden, there are no small parts.

He's going to make it just a big part.

Just small actors.

He's going to make it a big part.

100%.

Oh my God, but I totally see him being like the lion.

Lion.

Because it's like Wizard of Oz.

There's a lion in Wiccan.

I'm pretty sure.

Uh, maybe not.

I heard that he had already been cast, but I heard that prematurely as Dr.

like the professor

in truth thing.

I

yeah, are you ready for our fifth and final story, which is some content news that I find to be exciting?

It's the final story.

That's beautiful.

Okay, our fifth and final story is some exciting news.

Amazon is launching a new series called The Faragnes, starring Chiara Farrogni and Fidesz and their whole family.

You're kidding.

Not kidding.

They are Prime Video's newest reality TV family.

That's fabulous.

The show will premiere in December.

It filmed throughout late.

At the wedding?

No, no.

It filmed throughout late 2020 and early 2021 while she was pregnant, while Fidesz is preparing for a music festival.

And those who don't know, Kiara Ferragni was like the OG fashion blogger.

She turned her brand into like a billion-dollar business.

She's the most iconic fashion influencer.

I don't even think she's an influencer anymore.

Like, she used to be the blonde salad, remember?

She still does influencer tings.

But she's also so rich.

But she's also just like the face of louis vuitton right like she's just a celebrity and she's and she's italian and she married an italian pop star fedes and they are just like the biggest thing in milan and a baby their wedding was like literally a carnival it was crazy she has two sisters who are also influencers and the whole family is it's keeping up with the fragnes and fragnes is uh firogni and fedez their names put together that was their wedding their wedding hashtag the firognes so that's the name of the show because it's you know about their family which is i think this is going to be amazing no i think this is groundbreaking like honestly amazon has been really slacking in their content recently like i don't remember anything like when we watch viral shows like that everyone's watching none of it has been on amazon in a really long time like they needed this win and it's i'm so gonna watch this yeah also her she had a documentary a few years ago yeah that is also on prime video is like chiara frogney unposted and that was pretty good so i think this is just gonna be great i feel like she said i mean every year is so busy for her but especially in the last year like she gave birth so it's gonna be chronicling chronicling her pregnancy but like she never slowed down for one fucking second no she's iconic she's iconic she has amazing style she has like access to like the cool every designer people places things in the world i think this is gonna be an amazing show and for the promo shoot dave la chapelle shot the art in front of the duomo in milan like

just sickening that is sickening and this is just no the duomo's in florence oh yeah i've actually been that is true that's what i meant because um I know that from the Medici.

Oh, I know it because I've been there and I didn't climb the stairs because it was so hot and I like left my friends halfway.

Oh.

And I got gelato.

This is a great idea.

I'm very excited.

I'm definitely going to be watching it.

And I just want to like really, I'm so curious about like her business.

Like that's what I would love to know more about.

Like, what does she do?

Like, how does she make money?

Like, everything.

I mean, how does she not make money?

Yeah.

And also, so she has a brand, which like a lot of influencers and subs have brands, but like her shit is so cute.

Yeah, like the eyes, the shoes.

So, so cute.

Yeah, I think I used to have a a pair of her loafers.

Yeah, and she actually just came out with a line of jewelry that was so cute and all sold out.

Oh.

But it was sickening stuff.

And she's just like the true definition of like a global lifestyle brand.

Like she's literally global.

She is an international lifestyle beauty fashion brand.

Yeah, this is going to be a really good show.

Yeah, so I'm excited about that.

Okay, well, those with the fast five.

Feels so you needed to know them.

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Great.

Okay, dear toasters, our advice segment we do every Tuesday here at the morning toast.

If you ever want to email us your submission, it's deartoasters at gmail.com.

You can change people's names.

We will always keep you anonymous.

And just let us know how you're doing.

All right, first up.

Hello, Claudia, Jackie, Theo, and Bruno.

First of all, I love you both so much.

Jackie, congrats on the Bibbic, and Claude, congrats on the tour.

You guys are my favorites.

My best friend and I literally dress as you guys for Halloween this year.

She said you reposted her.

Oh, have fun.

Okay.

We got some good costumes this year.

I have a close-knit group of, I have a close-knit group of nine girlfriends from high school.

Most of us live in different cities now, but have been best friends for about 10 years now.

We're all meeting in Houston to go to your show, Claudia.

Oh, man, yes.

The first of us got engaged in September and immediately led us to know that they had already booked a baller venue in Houston on the evening of October 1st, 2022.

It's going to be one of those big fat Greek weddings that I would die if I missed.

Not to mention we are all obsessed with her fiancé and love her family like it's our own.

Now for the conflict.

Halloween morning, my mom sent a text in our family group text.

My only girl cousin had just gotten engaged.

I immediately squealed and sent my cousin multiple congratulatory texts to which she responded, make sure you are free on October 1st, October 2022.

Fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck.

I responded with, oh no, one of my best friends is getting married that day, to which she responded, wait, is that a joke, lol?

Oh god, my God, she's already a bridezilla.

My cousin and I are not super close.

She estranged herself from our entire family for about three years.

It was truly the strangest thing, but all is well now, thankfully.

She told me that she is planning planning a smaller wedding at our family's lake house about an hour outside Houston.

I would go if there wasn't another wedding that day, but it feels strange that I have to justify going to one wedding over another.

On the one hand, I don't want to miss out on being with my family at my cousin's wedding.

Think of the family portraits that I won't be in, but I would also...

But I would also have the most FOMO-IS FOMO ever if I missed out on my friend's wedding that same day.

What should I do?

I feel guilty for pulling the I heard about this wedding first and it's going to be more fun card.

But I also know that that family is family and I would hurt, I would be hurt if my only girl cousin didn't come to my wedding, whenever that will be.

But I also love my friend like family and would be equally sad if she wasn't there at my big day either.

Sincerely help.

Oh, I don't fucking know.

I don't know either.

Like, honestly, like, life is about doing the things you want to do.

And you want to go to your friend's wedding and I just think you should go.

I know that sounds terrible because family is everything.

Either way, someone's going to be disappointed.

You're going to be missing out on something.

So just go to the one that you would rather go to.

Like, at least

just, there's no right answer and there's no wrong answer.

Like, you can only go to one, just make a choice.

Obviously, you should probably like do the family is first, but like

for some reason, it's just you didn't sell it.

Yeah, no, you didn't sell it at all.

Like, cause we're so family.

Like, always, like, even if it sucks, like, you go to the family thing.

But I don't know.

I'm just, like, not feeling convinced.

And I think that you should go to your friend's wedding.

Yeah, I think you should really look inward on this one.

There's no magical answer how to make everyone happy here.

Right, you can't do both.

They're an hour away.

They're the same day.

You can't do both.

So you really just need to choose.

Yeah.

And whichever one you were to choose, like, there's going to be repercussions repercussions so you just have to make a choice and you if you do choose your friend's wedding like you just need to know like can you live with that decision like it'll like you'll always be gone from the pictures are you i don't need to know more about the relationship with this cousin like you were estranged for three years but like are you guys super close now she said we're close she says are good no she said we're not super close no but she didn't say super close but she did say things are good i do think she was trying to like downplay it so that we would tell her to go to a friend's wedding because that's what she wants to hear she said my cousin and i aren't super close close.

She estranged herself from our entire family for about three years.

Because that's what you want to hear because that's what you want to do.

So just do what you want to do and just deal with the consequences.

Yeah, I think in like this post-COVID world, like we should all just be doing what we want to do.

Like life's too short.

Life's too short to like miss out on a really fun wedding.

Yeah.

I think it's okay.

I do.

But also because you literally sold it that way.

But you have our blessing, whatever you decide to do.

So just know that.

And if your cousin's upset, be like, the morning toasts don't meet again.

Yeah, send her this episode.

Maybe you shouldn't have estranged yourself from your family for three years if you wanted your cousin to come to your wedding.

And you can send her this episode so that she can know what it feels like.

Because I think all of the listeners right now don't know what to say to you.

And like all the listeners are conflicted because family is always fierce, but the way you read this email to us, like, obviously you should go to your friend's wedding.

So like you like kind of gaslit us all.

I don't know.

I just think that you should

just make a choice, stick with it.

It's sex regardless, but it'll also be fun regardless.

Yeah, but like, that's not a helpful piece of advice.

She asked for which wedding to go to, and you literally just told her to make a decision.

I gave her permission to make whatever decision she wanted.

Yeah, that's what I did.

Yeah, and you know what sometimes all you need is a little permission.

Okay, next up.

Hello.

Thank you both for brightening my weekdays.

Here's a little dating history.

I've had a couple serious relationships over three years in my life and then I was single for four years where I probably went on about 30 dates.

Some turned semi-serious.

Some didn't make it past the first date.

I've lived in the same city for five years and I absolutely love it.

My parents are moving here soon and I have amazing friends here.

I've been dating a man for two years now who is everything I'd hoped I would find.

He is my favorite person in the world, but we are long distance in different states due to his job and other commitments.

I only see him a few times a year.

My quandary, I'm so freaking lonely sometimes.

I feel like I should just date someone in my own city, even though I wasn't able to find anyone nearly as compatible in the years I was looking.

My boyfriend can't move here because of his work and family, and if he did, it would be 10 plus years down the road.

Me moving there is the most probable option, but I have my family here for me and I haven't lived near them since high school.

Plus, my friends are here and I love the city so much.

Help, do I move?

Try it out for a while and even though his time is still limited, I'd be in a new city chilling on my own.

Should I try and find someone in my own city that's less complicated?

Thank you in advance for your unfiltered opinions and thoughtful advice.

I truly need it.

XYXO, a daily toaster.

I just want to say one thing before about this girl.

That's the only thing that's concerning me is like kind of the way you're writing this email.

You're like really analytical, like you're a data analyst.

Well, I dated here and we had X compatibility.

And now we have this man with Y compatibility, but the distance is Y over X.

But listen, you know what?

i'm not gonna fault you for being a rational thinker you know you could put a little more feeling into but yeah it's like some people but some people like lead only with their feelings and don't use their head at all and that's chaotic and that's chaotic too like someone who would jump from like city to city just like so i i'm not gonna fault you too much but i agree but my advice would be like put your heart into it a little bit like if does the idea of moving and being with your boyfriend make you so happy that it can forego the fact that you're not near your family anymore or does the idea of going to find someone new in your own city and breaking up with your current boyfriend break your heart?

Like, I need to know how you feel.

What do you love more?

Like your hometown, your family, your life.

Friends, or this man?

And I'm just not getting any

like feelings from you.

I don't know how you feel.

Do you love this man?

She said that they're really like that this is the guy.

It's giving robot.

It is giving robot, but like she's giving facts.

You know, which is super, super helpful, especially in the deer toasters because we're always like looking for, you know, supplementary facts.

But I mean, just the idea of you moving to be with him, like this better be the greatest love of all time or else it you're setting yourself up for failure no friends like no family he works all the time like but if this is your person your soulmate like you go there and you start your new life and you start a family and yeah right you make your own life like right your kids are your own you can't live for your high school friends and your hometown

But do you love this man?

That I didn't gather.

Do you love him more than your hometown?

It sounds like you ran a compatibility test on the internet when we used to do it with your kids.

Like Claudia and Maverick, 98% compatible.

Yeah, but sometimes I can love you more than my hometown.

So true, also.

So, and that's apparently a normal position to have.

So, yeah, I just need more information from you, like, from your heart.

Like, where is your heart in this?

I think you need to look inward.

That's two for two.

I'm looking inward today.

And

put aside the charts and the data points.

Yeah.

Close your laptop.

Close your laptop

and just ruminate in your feelings.

Close your laptop, close your eyes, and open your heart.

Yeah.

I don't know how, maybe a drink maybe could do that.

Yeah, you seem like someone who's not overly emotional, which I love, because I think sometimes when people write us in, like, they're so led by emotion and, like, not rational.

But I think actually, you, the pendulum has swung the other way.

Like, I could use a little, I love this man something, like some emotion.

Yeah.

That's all I need.

So I'd actually.

But you can't keep doing like this where you're like, you're lonely.

But like, she, she did say that, that, you know, she's lonely without him so and that

either you guys have to break up or you have to move there sorry yeah I agree the way it's going now is not gonna work no it's making me sad okay final one dear Claudia and Jackie first time writer long time toaster here I have a very complicated family problem that I would love to get your input on my family is super close so close that my sister-in-law has become my absolute best friend and the sister that I never had I do have an actual sister but we're not as close that's so mean

that's so mean that is so mean um anyways this sister-in-law mary kate has a twin sister Ashley.

Ashley has also become our adopted sister-in-law and also best friend.

The three of us have had babies together, got married together, have been through, have been there through good and bad for each other.

We celebrate all holidays and birthdays together with our families, usually always at my parents' house.

That's like nice, but weird, but nice.

Yeah.

But Mary Kate has recently filed for divorce from my brother.

Devastated isn't even a strong enough word to describe how we all feel.

It feels like our entire family is going through the big divorce.

We were all blindsided, my brother included.

No one did anything bad.

They just weren't meant to be, according to Mary Kate.

Though I understand why she wants a divorce, I'm heartbroken.

I feel like I've lost my sister and best friend.

I feel like I'm losing Ashley as well.

I can't imagine not seeing Ashley's kids grow up and I can't imagine Ashley and Mary Kate not seeing my kids grow up or be in my life.

We literally talk to each other all day, every day.

I am so torn.

I feel obligated to my brother to back off from Mary Kate and also Ashley by association, but they are truly my best friends and my sisters.

Ashley's kids think that My parents are their grandparents and my parents see her kids as their grandchildren.

What would you do if you were in my situation?

Would you continue your relationship with Mary Kate and Ashley?

Would you back off for a while?

I don't want to hurt my brother's feelings, but

I don't want to lose these girls.

They're my best friends and support system.

Please help.

Sincerely, a heartbroken sister-in-law.

Oh my God, that's so sad.

But you know what?

The good thing is that your brother and Mary Kate still have kids together.

So this girl will be in your life forever.

Yeah.

And it's so fresh right now that I think like you should take a step back, just like support your brother.

But they'll get to a place where they can co-parent and you'll all be family and you'll still do holidays together with your new spouses because you have kids together.

Yeah.

So if your family is as open and warm as they sound, I think that right now it's awkward and you should be there for your brother.

But in a year's time, like I actually think because they have kids together, you guys will still be seeing each other a lot and it'll be okay and acceptable for you to be super close.

Yeah, I would say as long as the divorce proceedings are going amicably, like I don't know why things have to change that much.

And just talk to your brother about it and make sure that he's okay with that.

And that, like, I think the brother, it sounds like, is going to need time.

Like, he was completely blindsided by her wanting to get divorced.

Oh.

That's what I felt like.

Like, he's heartbroken.

Not Not angry, but like, so it's like, okay, if you take a step back to be there for your brother, that will affect your relationship with Mary Kate, like, because you chose sides and it wasn't hers and she's your best friend.

But of course, you choose a brother, but maybe one day Mary Kate gets married to a new man and that could be like the brother you never had.

No, I'm kidding.

This is really, really hard.

I would just, I would keep in touch with everyone, keep tabs on everyone, make sure your brother feels supported.

And I think you can still talk to Mary Kate and Ashley as long as things aren't contentious in the divorce.

And then you would have to make a hard choice.

Yeah.

But try and keep everyone together.

Yeah, try.

And it's on you because you have put yourself in this position as being like the sister-in-law of all sister-in-laws.

And you know who's having the last laugh?

Your sister.

Literally!

Like so completely unaffected.

Your actual sister, completely unaffected by this.

Like, oh, Mary.

You chose strangers?

Yeah.

That's what you get.

Literally.

Oh, my God.

That is so funny.

No, but that is quite a pickle.

Like, I'm sorry.

But you got to stay with family, but do your best to keep everyone, like, don't let it get dark.

Divorce gets dark so quickly.

Yeah, you got, like, if you want to keep the family together, like, you have, you're going to have to put in the work.

It's on you.

And you're going to make sure everyone's communicating that, like, that no fight goes festers.

Like,

but.

I think it's worth it because this family unit that you're describing is so beautiful.

And it's also worth it for Mary Kate and your brother's kids.

Like, you want them to have, like, a good.

And nothing should change for the kids, really.

Yeah.

So you can always say, like, well, the kids have to see each other.

So Mary Kate, like, let's go get dranks.

Yeah, I think it's okay.

I think it'll get to, to, it's like bad now, but I think in a year, it'll be totally fine.

Yeah.

As long as divorce goes well.

Yes, I agree.

So that's a big issue.

Just monitor the situation, keep tabs on everything, keep everyone together.

And I think you can have your cake and eat it too.

Agreed.

Thank you to everyone who wrote into Deer Toasters.

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Okay, James Corden.

That's what I was thinking, too.

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