S3 Ep202: Robert Flatts: Thursday, December 10th, 2020

Good morning millennials.

Welcome back to the morning toast.

Happy Thursday.

Happy Taylor Swift Day.

Happy, happy.

Happy turtleneck day.

Claude and I are both wearing turtlenecks.

It's inside the toaster studio.

I just

also yesterday we were both wearing blazers.

Yes, blazers.

I feel as though we're both so simpatico.

I just have to say.

I wear a turtleneck specifically this one like almost every day.

So you're kind of like...

Just catching up.

That would be like if I wore you know culottes like i would never hurtful no no that's like your thing no and by the way i will have you know that when i had to clean out my closets for the move i do believe the culottes did not make the cut oh my god originally

original toasters will remember the culottes

what I like to call gaucho pants that really kind of shaped the toast in its early stages.

Mostly because I wore them on the first day of the morning toast.

And you wore them a lot like those first few months.

Yeah, you know, those were hard first two months.

And sometimes, sometimes you just can't help but put on your culottes.

And I feel like for other people, it's like, oh, I'm having a hard time.

Let me turn to my sweatpants.

And for me, or like listen to music.

No, no, no, but like in terms of fashion choices, you know, like your, your choices reflect the way that you're feeling.

Yeah.

For me, like, I...

Turn to the cul-otts.

I turned to the cul-otts.

The cul-otts were my sweatpants of the day.

And I'm not proud of it.

Why?

I think it's great.

At least it shows like you're interesting.

Like, I've literally never worn a pair of pants that wasn't like black leggings or black jeans.

And like you're not here just like taking risks.

Did they, did it work?

No.

But you are so sure of yourself that you just like took risks and put on a pair of pants very few people would ever put on.

And I think that makes you interesting and fabulous.

Wow, that is such a nice compliment.

Thank you.

No, it's true.

I'll take it.

I'll take it.

Like literally, people maybe have not noticed.

I've literally worn these leggings every single day this week and last week.

We love to see it.

I always, I'm always wearing these leggings too.

And I just, I thought, I don't know, I was going for like a mule day, but my, the color of my ankles are scary like pink and purple.

Yeah my skin because I didn't get that like you know I usually get sun once a year and now I didn't get my yearly sun.

I'm turning green.

Yeah.

It's time for some self like fake tanner.

Yeah, it ain't easy being green.

Yeah I reached this point last year.

It ain't easy being green.

Speaking of the Grin.

Well, that's Kermit the Frog, but sure.

Speaking of green.

No, speaking of being green and not having an easy go of it.

No,

speaking of fictional green characters, yes, I actually, I'm so glad you brought that up because I really did not want to bring my recap of the very small portion of the Grinch that I watched.

I didn't want to drag it into the TV recap segment because that's like a sacred place.

I just wanted to get it out right now.

And really just

shame on NBC.

Seriously.

Like, first of all, I put it on an hour late because like, I don't, I didn't care.

And it was a scene without Matthew Morrison.

And you'd think like it would be, you know, better.

It was just like,

besides Matthew Morrison, like, it was horrible.

Like, explain to me, you know how like the Who's all have like noses that are like turned up, turned up, yeah.

Yeah, they turn the fuck up.

So, they not only gave all the Who's turned-up noses, they also gave all the Who's like big fat asses.

Like, they had like curves, it was crazy.

Like, literally, everyone had like a huge, huge hips, and it was like everyone was shaped like pear, which was like such an odd choice because, like, Matthew Morrison's like running around the stage with like a big juicy ass.

It was like so disarming.

The Grinch did have a big, juicy ass.

But it was, this was like so overt.

Like,

it was just so bizarre.

He literally looked like someone like, like, like a baby with like a big diaper, you know?

Like, it was so weird.

And then, so it was just like really poorly done.

I'm sorry, I have to say.

And then Matthew Marzon came down the chimney and like my life was ruined.

He was being so extra.

Like you, and like.

First of all, he was completely disguised, but his voice, he really didn't do a good job of like nailing the Grinch voice.

So it was like, it was Mr.

Shu.

Like his voice just sends a chill down my spine and it's so

distinct that it was, I mean, I don't know what the team at NBC is thinking right now, but it was a big fat failure.

And I was reading tweets all night and it was so funny.

Like I just love when we can all come together to like make fun of something, you know?

That's so funny.

I caught bits and pieces, really not a lot.

I did see Matthew Morrison.

And I just feel like there were so many people.

There are so many people who would have been amazing at it.

And even just thinking that, like, I didn't come prepared with a list of people, but like Hugh Jackman

would have crushed it.

Zach Efron.

Yeah.

But it's like a weird role.

You have to, like, that's why Jim Carrey made the Grinch so iconic.

Is like, you have to be like, you can't be like so Hollywood.

Like, you have to just like be a freak.

Like, yeah.

And Matthew Marshall tried so hard to be that, but he just is so cringy.

He's just a freak.

Yeah.

Honestly, I don't even know if Hugh Jackman would have been good at it.

The reason why the Grinch is, in my opinion, like irrep, irrep irreplaceable is because Jim Carrey.

Like no one can do it like him.

So also like, why not Jim Carrey?

Yeah.

He's around.

Yeah.

He doesn't sing, I don't think.

Anyone can sing if you try hard enough.

There's always going to be another mountain.

So, I just wanted to get that out.

My TV recap with Salt Lake City and OC, Jackie and I both watched OC, even though we promised that we wouldn't.

We'll do that in the TV recap.

I just wanted to get it out there.

Like, I'm sorry to everyone who was traumatized by that performance last night.

And honestly, it's been such a hard year.

I find it really, I don't know, I find it shocking that

the executives over at NBC would like intentionally want to hurt us.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's not nice.

It ain't right.

It ain't right.

Well, at least it's behind us.

You know, like, I feel like there was so much all of this like momentum leading up to this, and now it's behind us.

And we can all like look ahead to 2021.

Yeah.

And we're looking ahead to tomorrow, which Taylor Swift announced this morning.

She has a new album.

We will go into all of that.

That's why I'm wearing my cardigan

today.

Getting in my cardigan.

Remember what I said about anyone singing?

Me?

Yeah, no, we're going to be talking about that

more.

And also, oh, last night I had just a sublime evening, if I may.

I hosted

Taylor's parents, that's Olivia and Zach Shapiro, at my house.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Taylor was there too.

I remember not being invited.

Yeah.

Yeah, no, you were not invited.

It was, I'm really just trying to spend QT with individual family members these days.

That's just like something that I'm feeling.

Okay.

Also, I want to have, you like, won't come over.

So, and I came to you on Monday night.

I have never been invited.

That's not true.

You invited me on Monday night after we had a plan to get together at my house, to which you invited yourself over.

Like, you made the plans and then tried to flip a switch.

You tried to be the princess switch.

I don't remember that way.

Princess, I remember.

That's the rest I don't.

That's exactly how it happened, okay?

The rest, I don't.

That's good.

But anyways, so I, every time I go over to Olivia's, like, I'm just so hungry and she makes such good food.

So I wanted to provide that experience for her.

And I cooked up a feasty vibe and I used like all of my fancy dishes.

And it was so fabulous and sensational.

You'll have to come over sometime.

I think you would have really liked the the cuisine: chicken and pasta.

Yum, my two favorite food groups.

Yeah, yum.

Well, thanks for not inviting me.

I really like it, I appreciate it.

You know, no, you'll definitely be not invited again.

No, and that means so much to me.

And just it's good to know where we stand.

Yes, definitely.

And tonight's the first night of Hanukkah.

Oh, yes.

If you're celebrating Hanukkah toaster, make sure to light those candles and publicize the nace.

It is so important more than ever, it always feels like to publicize the nace and be proud to be Jewish.

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel,

I made you out of clay.

And when it's dropped, we really need to redo that song because like there's so many good Christmas carols.

Cabaret style.

And that's our one song and it's just like so sophomoric.

It's like, it's the same tune as like Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.

Yeah, no, it's the same tune as like something.

La la la la la la.

La la la la la la la.

La la la la la la.

It's a familiar tune.

Yeah, and it just goes round and round.

We need to like, honestly, like, have someone work on it, like a, like a Jewish musician.

Honestly, like, no, I was going to say Haim, but they're not my style.

Who's like a really popular Jewish?

I heard somewhere Sean Mendez is like half Jewish.

Yeah, same with Harry Styles.

Oh, Harry Styles.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That'd be good.

Like, just give us like a revamp.

I'm so over this one tune, and it's like the only one that's like become even remotely mainstream.

And it's just like,

I don't feel like it represents us as a culture and like how cool we are.

I actually love this song, and I feel like I'm always singing it because whenever I ring up Snatchler, I'm like, Snatchler, Snatchler, Snatchler.

I made you out of snatch.

And when your snatch is ready,

oh, Snatchler, I shall play.

Maybe we could be the ones to jazz it up.

Allow me to get my guitar.

Oh, for a good jam session.

By the way, I kept saying publicize the nace.

And for those who don't know me, it's publicize the miracle.

Ness is miracle.

And the miracle of, you know, the candles lasting.

So you put your oil lasting.

Yeah.

So you put your menorah in the window to publicize the miracle of Hanukkah just a little fun fact and I live in a bunker with no windows so it's hard for me to publicize the names oh my god now that I have so many windows I literally am gonna put a menorah in each one just public publicity I'm happy for you I'm the PR person for Hanukkah for you and all your windows you should come over actually in my journey to like maybe moving um I looked at an apartment yesterday that um I really like the building because I actually like have a bunch of friends who live in the building which sounds so fun to me um and you know when like you want something to like just work so badly Yeah.

The apartment was just not it.

Except it had like the biggest kitchen I'd ever seen in a New York City apartment.

It had like a formal dining room and then like a place in the kitchen to like put a table.

Which is breakfast.

Which is insane.

Like that's just not a thing.

And I just, I wanted it to be the right apartment.

It just like would have been so easy if the first one I, but it wasn't.

I'm sorry.

It was really upsetting.

I got my hopes like way high up.

I just want you to know, like, I've gotten the boys' hopes up and the boys being the pups and our husbands.

And I feel like the toaster's now too that like we live in the same building soon.

I tried.

Yeah, we're going to have to try again.

What do you want me to do?

Build a new unit?

No, just like be patient for something to come on the market.

See, that's...

I'm so glad you brought that up.

The one thing I don't have right now or ever is patience.

It's like, it's probably one of my worst qualities about like how impatient I am.

Yeah.

And it impacts every facet of my life, like work, personal.

Like, I just am so.

motherfucking impatient.

Like, I can't wait for anything.

Okay.

Fine.

I'll tell them to speed it up.

Maybe if you could just like be a terrible neighbor and encourage some of your other people in the building to move out.

I know.

Only people, though, in a two-bedroom.

Okay, fine.

I'm going to work on it.

We're going to, we're going to make this happen for you.

I found a great apartment in Olivia's building.

No pets.

Oh.

Which is like, that is just so unbelievably disgusting that

I would never even want to support a building like that.

You shouldn't even hear those words.

No, I know.

Oh my gosh.

Vile, vile behavior.

So sick.

Okay, well, we need to get into things because we have a jam-packed fast five stories today, like that even one had to get cut.

Wow.

You know it's cool.

Was it one of the ones I sent?

No.

Okay, good.

But without further ado, it is time for the fast five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

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Yes, and speaking of iconic music.

Oh, great transition.

Surprise, more new Taylor Swift music is on its way.

Today, just over four months after she released her album Folklore, the Grammy winner announced that another album, her ninth studio album, is on the way.

Titled Evermore, the so-called sister album to folklore, drops later tonight at midnight Eastern Time.

So Taylor posted on her Instagram that Evermore is coming.

She said, to put it plainly, we just couldn't stop writing songs.

To try and put it more poetically, it feels like we were standing on the edge of the folklorean woods and had a choice to turn and go back or to travel further into the forest of this music.

We chose to wander deeper in.

Let me

just try try and explain how I'm feeling.

Please, please.

Part, of course, like on the surface, I'm so excited.

Like, all I ever want is Taylor Swift music.

I feel like so many fandoms get like so much music from their favorite artists.

And it's like, I waited like two years after for reputation, and then two years, like, it's so exciting.

I feel like an Ariana Grande fan, like, we just get so much music.

And so, on the surface, I'm like, so, so excited, especially because like folklore is really like in terms of genre, like one of my favorites, especially given the year that we've had.

And

I'm just looking forward to getting another 15 songs similar to folklore also i looked at the track titles and a lot of them definitely seem like things i would be interested in like i love a song just named after a woman so we have dorothy what is that about who knows we also have marjorie who knows we also have a song called the last cowboy which

I just know is going to be some.

It's going to be Betty vibes.

Like, that's what I'm getting for sure.

Wow.

We're also getting a music video tonight for the song Willow, which I just love the name Willow.

So there's a lot to be excited about.

There is.

And I personally just want to say I'm excited about the title of this album because for those of you who are familiar with The Ghost of Sneech's Past, she haunts the halls of the house we rented in Utah forevermore.

And I just love that it's so spooky.

It's such a great word.

And I'm glad that it will be like...

It also reminds me of that Josh Groban song from Beauty and the Beast.

A stunning song if you don't know it.

So yes, I'm here for all those things.

How else are you feeling?

No, I think if I unpack my feelings a little bit more, like I woke up and I was just like feeling very overwhelmed.

That's what I was thinking.

I don't know what time she posted eight and I woke up.

Like I was on my phone by like 8.45 and I I was just getting inundated with like DM.

I'm like, wake up, wake up.

And it's like, I just felt like very anxious.

And now I'm just feeling overwhelmed because you have work to do this weekend in digesting a whole new album.

No, and it's like, I wasn't even going to stay up till midnight tonight, but like now I have to.

And it's like, my sleep is so important to me these days.

And I just, I don't know.

I think if I really like think about how I feel, I'm feeling very overwhelmed.

Like, I don't even know if I've had enough time to sit with folklore.

And I've listened to folklore so much, but like, still, it's like, I'm, especially after the new Disney Plus thing, like, I'm learning more about other songs.

And, like, I'm listening to this is me trying so much more.

And that was a song I used to skip.

Like, I'm just,

I'm feeling overwhelmed.

Like, that's the only word I can use.

Like, I'm, I'm overwhelmed.

Well, I feel like, I understand why you're overwhelmed, but I feel like because this is a sister album, like, you'll spend the weekend listening to this.

You'll be introduced to these songs.

And then eventually you'll listen to folklore and Evermore together because they should be the same vibe.

They're sister albums.

She also, sisters, just like us.

And we love sisters.

And we're sisters who support other sisters.

So therefore, we have to support folklore and Evermore.

Very true.

Very true.

Also, there are some collabs on the album.

Yes.

Sonny Ver shows up again.

Love.

They obviously work great together again.

Haim shows up again.

How are you feeling?

I'm not a big Haim fan, but Taylor can make me like anyone, so like, whatever.

I'm like obviously like the biggest national fan now.

And the National is also doing a collab, which is exciting because Aaron Dessner, who was in the folklore, for people who like aren't really like insular, like in the Taylor Swoke world, let me explain it to you.

In the Disney Plus documentary, that guy Aaron Dessner, who like created a lot of the songs with Taylor and Jack, is a part of a band called The National.

So now I guess he's was working on folklore more more as of a producer, and now he's like a full-on collaborator, like him and his band.

I don't know if other people are in the National, but I think there's probably a few guys.

I'm sure.

Yeah.

I think.

Well, that's.

Yeah, because he said, like, that's how they write songs.

Like, yeah, his band.

Because, like, I just found out that, like, um,

Panic of the Disco is just like one guy.

Really?

Yeah, there's no band.

It's just Brendan Urey.

That's like his stage name.

That doesn't sound like what I thought.

No, same.

It was like shocking when I found out.

Stitch told me.

Also, I'm pretty sure that Bonnie Bear is a band, and Justin's the lead singer.

No.

I think so.

I was doing some investigative work.

Just wait.

I'm googling it.

I wasn't even investigating.

I just stumbled on it.

That just doesn't sound familiar.

It's an American indie folk band founded by Justin Vernon.

I'm just going to choose to.

It's a band, they said was a band.

The thing is, and it's categorized as a band.

That very well may be true.

I just will not continue on.

Like, I don't want to change what I know or anything.

It doesn't work for me.

Bonnie Bear's a guy, and it's like, I'll know that that's wrong, but I'm just like really not interested in like resetting how I see Bony Vear.

Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, no, I understand.

It's too much for one day.

It's so much.

Like, I'm so overwhelmed.

Like, I'm just,

that's, just don't even say it.

Like, I'm, that's too much for me.

Okay.

Okay.

So.

That was like when I found out that like the lead singer of Rascal Flats' name was not Rascal.

It was Gary.

Like that was a huge shakeup.

Yeah, and you're just finishing processing that.

I'm still not over it.

What's the point in naming your band?

That's what's confusing.

Bony Bear.

Like, that does sound like a name, kind of, kind of.

But like, Rascal Flats is like literally naming your band Claudia Oshray.

Like, no, no, no.

Well, that makes no fucking sense.

That's not a whole name.

Rascal Flats?

That's not someone's like real name.

Why not?

It could be, but it's not like, oh, that's an, that's not like John Smith.

No, that it's literally John Smith.

Rascal is such a common name.

Flats is a last name.

Rascal.

Rascal's not a name.

It's not a common name.

Wait.

What?

Wait.

What?

Wait,

I can't even get into your mindset that rascal could be someone's name?

What?

Like, it could be like tree could be someone's name.

Wait, like, rascal's like a name?

Like, rubber?

No, no.

Wait.

Like, rascals, like, little rascals.

Like, oh, my God, wait.

It's a mischievous or cheeky person, especially a child or a man.

So, like, no one's going to name their kid rascal.

You're so right.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, that I'm saying the word so much.

I see how you thought it was a name.

No, like.

I can't even explain what I'm feeling right now.

Like, I'm so upset.

Oh, my God.

This whole time.

I don't know.

I saw the word rascal with a capital R and I'm like, oh, it's like a name, like, robber.

Like, robber flies.

Oh my god, I sound so stupid.

I've said this like so many times.

I've never really dug deeper.

No, I'm like, shook up.

You shook up.

I'm so confused.

Like,

rascals and nature.

Rascal's just a word.

Like, I guess, yeah.

Yeah.

And it sounds like a common

little rascals.

I guess that's

a bunch of kids who are being mischievous.

Oh, God.

Oh, my God.

I'm just learning so much today.

That's like really shaking up my psyche.

And so, like, now, are you feeling over?

I'm feeling so uneasy.

Like,

everything you thought is just so upset.

Like, everything you thought you knew is being brought into question.

No, it's like the way that I saw the world is completely different now than it was 10 minutes ago.

Yeah.

Sometimes that can happen.

That happened to me with Dakshun.

Like, I'm telling you.

That was crazy.

Did you see there was a Dakshun in Salt Lake City last night?

In one of the B-rolls, there was a Dakshin running across the world.

I don't watch B-roll.

Like, I'm always scrolling on my phone.

Oh, that's funny.

Oh, my God.

I'm shook up by that.

We're just going to give you a minute to process that.

No, I'm okay.

Like,

you know what?

Rascal is a similar word to, I feel like, what?

Snitch.

It's also like scoundrel.

So I guess if there was a band called Snitches Ain't, like, I would think that that was a weird word.

That's a full name.

That's a person to me.

First name Snitches, last name ain't.

I know her.

Yeah, of course.

Oh, my God.

Okay.

So Evermore comes out tonight.

Everyone streams it.

And I'm actually curious, just like from the business side of things,

will she be able to sell over a million copies, which is like her thing.

Most of her albums have.

Um,

but because she releases an album once every two years, like, will she be able to do that twice in a year?

Yes.

That'll be crazy.

Yes, because folklore was so successful.

Folklore was so successful.

People are saying, this is folklore part two.

Okay, everyone who subscribed to part one is going to be interested in part two.

Yeah.

And if the music is good, the music speaks for itself.

Speaks for itself.

You're right.

You can't get people to like buy, like, it's so crazy how that happens.

Like, actually, on the one hand, I feel like sometimes people put out bad music and like it becomes popular.

Yeah.

But But like sometimes you put out a bad album and like the people respond, art pop.

You know?

Wow, that was like we've been sitting on that for a while.

No, but like, you know what I mean?

You can't just like put out an album and expect it to like soar unless it's really, really good.

Yeah, but then even still people put out really, really good albums that just flop, which is so crazy to me.

I'm not sure I'm with that.

But that's because we live in a generation of people who have no taste.

Lotus, Christine Anguillera, justice for it.

I feel like in a lot of ways Joanne wasn't successful.

But it was stunning.

But it was stunning.

It was stunning, beautiful, stunning, and smart.

There's just like a few of those that like, honestly, I think one of the greatest albums of all time is Native by One Republic, and like, nobody's ever heard of it.

Yeah, but they know the songs from the commercials on ABC.

Yes.

I got my mind made up, and I can't let it go.

I'm feeling so uneasy.

Like, you know what?

Like, I was already feeling uneasy when we started the show because I'm having like such cramps.

I've tried to hide it from you guys, but I couldn't.

I'm the American cramper.

But

all of the laughter, it's like, it's shaking up my cramps.

Yeah.

It's truly what they say.

Laughter is the best medicine.

It's not like my my cramps have gone away, but now they're like a little disoriented.

They're like, what's this other pain in the belly?

No, I think that cramps like feed off of your depression.

So like, honestly, your endorphins are now like kicking in.

Yeah, and they're just combating cramps.

Right next to my midol.

Midol?

Midol.

Midol.

My god, remember in the beginning of quarantine when I thought that you couldn't take midol because of the acetamiphian?

And you weren't taking it?

I didn't take it for my first quarantine period, and then I realized like I got my things mixed up.

That's crazy.

I don't take midol.

Midol is everything.

You need to give it, you need to be patient with it.

30, 40 minutes.

Solves all your problems.

Really?

Solves all of your.

I'm just like an Advil queen, but I need to stop taking Advil for like everything in my life.

And also, you're not supposed to take Advil when you're on

because it's a blood thinner, so it affects your flow.

Flow.

I can't be buying flow and a wide-set vagina.

And flow is also another prestigious end.

Yes.

Yeah.

And, you know, she gets a bad rap.

Maybe that's why she comes hard for me because she's like, you're too good of an end.

Like, I'm the number one ant.

And that's not what she does.

She's trying to toughen you up because being an auntie is a lot of work.

It's true.

It's true.

Okay, ready for our next story?

Yes.

Tiffany Haddish turned down hosting the Grammys Pre-Telecast.

And here's why.

Tiffany Haddish was asked to host the Grammys Pre-Telecast premiere ceremony, but the comedy superstar says she turned down the offer when the recording academy told her that she had to pay her own way.

Yeah, like not get a salary.

Not only did they ask her to host the three-hour live stream event without any compensation, but she tells Variety that they wouldn't cover hair, hair, makeup, or wardrobe for the three-hour event?

Three hours?

Oh my God, that sounds like torture.

She said, all that would have,

all that would have had to come out of my pocket.

I don't know if this might mean I might not ever get nominated again, but I think it's disrespectful.

I totally agree.

Yes, for context, the pre-show, it's not hosted by, it's not like organized by CBS.

It's done by the Academy, which is a not-for-profit organization.

So all hosts, presenters, and performers have traditionally performed gratis, including this year.

Okay.

does that mean the person who hosts the Grammys Real Show doesn't get paid?

I don't know.

Or does CBS pay them?

Oh, I don't know.

That's a good question.

But, like, obviously, presenters, performers don't get paid.

And I guess that would translate over to red carpet hosts, even though I feel like they're the hardest working people there.

Yeah, I mean, I mean, now that.

Okay, I guess the recording academy, like technically, yes, is a non-profit.

It doesn't give off like non-profit vibes.

No, it doesn't give you a lot of gives big, fancy telecoms.

It gives off very profitable vibes.

It gives off like very like private equity vibes, okay?

so i don't know i think asking people to work for free is a big thing in hollywood but like it's more so when you're up and coming so it's like

honestly tiffany haddish would be doing the grammys a favor by lending her name and likeness to this pre-show telecast that i never even heard of you know what i mean yeah so it's like okay if someone like a digital star or like a rising host got this opportunity they would do it for free because it's worth their time for the opportunity tiffany haddish doesn't need this she's one of the biggest comedians in the world.

So they should really just be like, it is disrespectful.

You know, I understand that they're not going to pay people to do their red carpet, but then you got to lower your standards.

Yeah.

No, no.

I understand you're not going to pay people.

So don't ask the biggest comedian in the world.

Like, maybe I'll do it.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

Like,

it is disrespectful.

And just to offer someone a job for no money, like,

seems fucked up.

Like,

yeah, especially someone who

doesn't need to do this.

It's like

they don't need it.

Tiffany Haddish will be just as relevant and famous, whether or not she hosts this telecast or not.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That is really interesting, though.

And I feel like a lot of times there are sort of these question marks.

It's either like with these big opportunities, they're either getting paid so much money or they're not getting paid at all.

Right, because it's like, okay, there's someone hosting the Oscars.

Like when Kevin Hart was, whoa, my water bottle just like popped.

Like when Kevin Hart was supposed to host it, like in a lot of ways, he's always said that was like his biggest dream.

He would do it for free.

But it's also like the biggest job in the world.

So like who has more money than the Oscars?

Yeah.

So I don't know.

I always think that too.

Like when you go on Jimmy Fallon, like the Super Bowl, for example, it's so much work, but it is and like you're giving the performance of a lifetime.

So on the one hand, you should be paid millions of dollars.

But on the other hand, it's a stage like no other.

You're going to hit the top of the iTunes charts.

So they don't get paid.

Are you sure?

Yes.

But it's sponsored by Pepsi.

So I would feel like Pepsi would pay people to use their name and likeness in association with Pepsi brand.

The Super Bowl performers do not get paid.

Like last time I thought about this, but let me just double check.

I feel like that's actually one they would get paid for only because it's sponsored.

Herbal performers paid.

I feel like, I feel like they do.

They're not paid to perform according to CNBC.

Okay.

Yeah, I just have things like, do people get paid to go on Ellen or Jimmy Fallon?

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't think so.

Right.

I think in general, like

getting paid to do press is not done.

A thing.

I agree.

Or like, do you get paid to be in the cover of a magazine?

Yes.

So that's where it gets confusing.

But that's because you sell your story.

Right.

Right.

And like you have day rates for like the photo shoot.

Yeah, it's confusing.

Yeah.

The line is super blurry.

We need like a true A-lister to come on the show and just like spit.

Like, what do you get paid for?

What don't you get paid for?

Like, what do you pay for yourself?

What could you get paid for?

Yeah, and it's like, okay, if you have a music label and like,

like, do they pay for your like suburbans?

Like, I just have questions.

Yeah.

You know, suburbans.

People come from.

People are always rolling around in suburbans.

And I'm just curious who's footing the bill.

And is it Uber XL?

Right.

That's a great question.

Because when I'm in a suburban, it's always Uber XL.

I also feel like

a lot of times these days it is Uber XL.

Like it used to not be used to be like suburban.com.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But now it's Uber XL.

Yeah, I agree.

I'm just, I'm, I find celebrity culture to be so interesting, but I really find like the logistics to be even more interesting.

Like, how do you get from place to place?

Like, when celebrities hang out, do you guys text each other or do the managers text each other?

I think it's a combination, but I'm just curious.

No, when Chrissy Teigen does a really good job of letting people into the logistics of being a celebrity.

Yeah, she remembers to do those QAs, so she needs to do another one.

Yeah.

Okay, this next story.

Anyways, so bottom line, like if you want Tiffany Haddish to do your red carpet, like you gotta pay her.

And if you don't have a budget, that's totally understandable as a non-profit.

But reach out to some hosts who could use the exposure.

Yeah, dream smaller.

Yeah.

Okay, next story is like really amazing news for Jessica Simpson.

I know.

Amazon is prepping Jessica Simpson docuseries and scripted series based on her memoir as part of a multimedia rights deal.

So Jessica Simpson is just having a great week.

Like she sold, she literally sold the rights to her book, which like, every author tries to do, and she sold it to Amazon Studios.

Like, that is just

what's better.

No, there's, and after her book had like the most amazing year.

So, Amazon is opening the book on Jessica Simpson after striking a broad multimedia rights deal with the pop in reality TV star.

The streamer is working on an unscripted docuseries based on Simpson's memoir open book.

So, does that mean like a reality show?

That's what I was confused about because it's like, okay, it's a piece of content based on her life,

her previous life, like in her, that she already wrote about.

But then it's also unscripted.

So, a reality show based on what already happened.

Yeah, it's not reality.

No, I feel like it's a reality show of her now, just like they're using buying the book rights to justify it.

Yeah, and then also a scripted

coming-of-age scripted series inspired by the book, which sounds like her early 20s, like rising to fame.

That sounds so good,

so so good.

Yeah, I'm really excited about this.

Open Book was truly one of the best books I read all year, except for mine, which I don't know if I've spoken about today.

Uh, I'm writing a book, it's very exciting.

I wrote it.

Oh, shit.

Already.

It's all in here.

The ink is dry.

It's called Girl With No Job.

The Crazy Beautiful Life of an Instagram Thirst Monster.

It is available for pre-order anywhere you can get books, e-books, audio books, and hardcover books, Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Audible, all the places.

If you go to the link, girlwithnojob.com/slash book, you'll get all the links.

And I would really appreciate you supporting the book.

I'm a first-time author.

I'm very excited about it.

Jackie has read the book.

She actually has a blurb on the back.

Thea was also on the back.

So it's just truly a family affair.

Check it out.

Girlwithnojob.com/slash book.

Yes, Jessica Simpson's book was one of the best things I read all year, and now it's just gonna be like the gift that keeps on giving because we're getting more content from it.

Yes, and more content from her.

Also, just want to say, Redheads episode just dropped.

I dropped it yesterday because it was like early, but also still six days late.

Um, Invisible Life of Addie LaRue was the book we read this month.

We're recapping it.

The book was so good, and I think it was one of my favorite episodes that we've done this year.

One, because of the great recap, but two, we shared all of our other favorite books of the year.

And I don't want to spoil anything, but Open Book by Jessica Simpson was one of my top top three books of the year that I read non-Redheads.

Did you add my book, even though it's not published yet?

No, because we tried to do like 2020 titles.

So hurtful.

But you're a 2021 title.

Why would you want to be like looped into this year?

I don't know.

I just like any airtime for my book is genuinely pretty.

We did talk about the fact that you next month is going to be super exciting because one, we're doing a Red Heads episode first Thursday of January, as always.

Snitch's choice for the book.

I said Snitch's book choice was it, and someone commented, so the the book choice is IT, like with the balloon, right?

No, it's Layla by Colleen Hoover, which is a book that I've been seeing everywhere.

It's Snitch's favorite author.

We haven't read a Colleen Hoover book yet.

Supposed to be like very similar to Verity, which everybody loved.

So I'm just really excited about that.

But then we also get a bonus episode in January because we are sitting down our first ever author series.

We're sitting down

inside the Redhead Studio.

Oh, we're returning.

Inside the Redhead Studio, we're sitting down with first-time author Claudia Ashre, and we are going to get, we're going to be asking her the card questions about her books.

So, you're gonna wanna be there for that.

And it's never too late to become a redhead.

Also, I feel like this episode that we just did is like the perfect kind of episode that you can listen to, even if you didn't read the book.

I always give a summary of the book at the beginning of the episode.

Oh, that's smart.

And usually, it's like three minutes.

This summary was like 10 minutes, so you'll know the entire book, and then you can follow along with the recap.

Yeah, you should start doing that for like popular books that are read in high schools.

So, like, a lot of high schoolers who don't want to read the books will literally tune into your podcast.

You should do like podcast episodes about, but it's like not just a book.

It's like you gotta do the invisible case of the dog in the middle of the night uh portrait of Dorian Gray oh yeah I actually love picture of Dorian Gray but um the Odyssey Iliad yeah but also it's like we'll give you the recap but we'll also answer like DBQs as we always say it's like the pencil on the table was a phallic symbol so that we have like opinions to give you so you can raise your hand and be in class and be like inquisitive and Hamlet was in love with his mother yeah but we'll have like Dana really do all that so you sound really smart that's actually a great idea for a podcast yeah just like shit you need to know in high school no like impress your professor yeah yeah Okay, well, are you ready for our next story that I chose?

I don't know if you've seen it, and I'm hoping that I'm about to give you some life-changing news.

Okay.

There is an iCarly revival.

Of course I've heard of it.

Sorry, you see.

Web show hosts keep up with other web show hosts.

Set at Paramount Plus with original cast members returning.

I can't get too excited about these reboots because one, we announce them and I never see the actual content.

And if we do, it's like saved by the bell and they're just like being cringy and writing bad jokes.

And then it's like the things that I actually want to get,

the reboots that I'm actually excited about, Hillary Duff, Lizzie Maguire, like never get made.

BCB.

Yeah, I just, the whole reboot industry is something that like our generation, millennials, like love.

And I just couldn't give less of a shit.

Can I tell you what I do love about the reboot industry?

Like, I love when like it's like, all right, Carly, reboot.

And we get to talk about it on the show.

And we get so excited the cast is coming back.

And then I never want to pick it up ever again.

Ever.

You know, I do like the

think, just the announcing part of like what shows are coming back.

But like, I just know what this is going to be.

It's going to be the cast like sitting around on Zoom, laughing about old jokes.

Like, I just, I'm not interested.

I'm not sure.

Now, here's what I actually am interested in as it pertains to the iCarly reunion.

The involvement of one Dan Schneider.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm not seeing his name in this article.

Okay.

But I'm very curious about that as well.

They're saying that the original series stars Miranda Cosgrove, Jerry Trainer, and Nathan Kresser are all set to appear in the new version of.

But what about Jeanette McCurdy?

They didn't say Jeanette McCurdy.

Okay, because Jeanette McCurdy is very vocal online about, you know, kind of the traumatizing experiences she had as a child actor and as it pertains to certain producers within the network.

So

that's actually crazy that she's not going to be there because she's just honestly after Miranda Cosgrove, she's the most important like and relevant main character.

For sure.

I also feel like iCarly was so ahead of its time, like girl with a web show.

Yeah.

And now it's like, if there's an iCarly in 2020, like there's a million iCarlys.

Like she's an influencer.

We are all iCarly.

Yeah.

She's a YouTuber.

She might have a podcast.

And it's like, are they really going to delve into the, like, it would would actually be an interesting show if it was a show about like an influencer.

Yeah.

T

has like many a time tried to, like Emily and Paris, like tried to capture the life of like a social media star.

And it's never not cringy.

And I would actually be really interested to see, see it one time.

And not iCarly, but just like one time it be done correctly.

Cause it actually is like, especially people who are like really successful at their jobs and like get amazing opportunities.

because of their Instagram, like it's a super interesting life.

And if they're one time like they were able to capture it correctly, even like with Tana's series on MTV, which I didn't watch, but I don't think was very good.

Um, she is such an interesting life, and it became so overproduced.

Like, I just one time want to see, like a piece of content, whether it's unscripted or or scripted, like the life of a social media star, like done right.

Yeah, I totally agree, but it's always cringy, like be ba, hashtag, be kind, like, it's just so lame.

Yeah.

So, we'll keep you probably not posted on this news, but just always exciting.

Yes.

Fifth and final story, Claude sent to me some major tech news.

Major biz news.

Major tech biz legal news.

Time for a little major tech biz legal news.

Facebook has been hit with two massive antitrust lawsuits from the FTC, and 46 states are seeking to spin off Instagram and WhatsApp.

Basically just saying Facebook owning Instagram and WhatsApp is somehow a monopoly.

Yeah.

Right?

That it's too big.

So these are antitrust lawsuits, one from the Federal Trade Commission and and the other one from 48 state attorneys general.

Both lawsuits revolve around the company's acquisitions of Instagram in 2012 and WhatsApp in 2014, which at the time got regulatory approval, but have recently come under heavy scrutiny as people are saying like Facebook is too big.

And I guess one way to just like make it smaller is to take off away those things.

Okay.

So here are my thoughts as a consumer and just like someone who operates in the digital space.

Like Facebook owning WhatsApp is so irrelevant.

Like I just have to say like that is not a monopoly.

Not my problem.

WhatsApp is a messaging app.

It's not not a social media platform.

It's an internal, like, it's just, it's so irrelevant to this conversation.

The real conversation is, like, is Facebook owning Instagram a monopoly?

And I just feel like at the time of the sale, someone should have objected.

And the fact that they didn't, it's like, I don't know.

I feel like I believe in the rules.

Like, they got approved.

Like, they should just be able to stay.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

That's like annoying for like someone to like let you like do a certain thing and then take it change your mindsies.

Yeah.

Yeah.

No baxies.

No backsies, Facebook.

Yeah.

No, no, no.

What's actually crazy is that I think if you look into it, like the WhatsApp acquisition is actually a much bigger deal than Instagram.

Yeah, but just like in our world, we're like, irrelevant.

Irrelevant.

And like Instagram feels so big to us, whereas like Instagram compared to Facebook is actually like kind of small.

And I think it's really interesting.

I think we're at an interesting place in the technology.

slash government landscape and I and

what happens here will will really determine like how things go for ever.

Forever, Movie.

Yeah.

Wait, also, though, now that I think about it, Facebook owning Instagram, like, okay, is definitely a conglomerate.

But I don't think I would consider it a monopoly given the fact that there are a few other big social media players, like TikTok, Twitter.

It's not like they're the only two apps that are popular.

Google YouTube.

Google YouTube.

Right.

So why is Google owning YouTube okay, but Facebook owning Instagram is not?

I mean, this is a fucking comparison.

This is what I'm saying.

Like, this could be, you know, something

if it's taken away from them, then maybe Google and YouTube could be next.

Yeah, that's interesting.

It'll be interesting to watch this play out.

I got to go home and turn on NSMBC.

And then also, it's like, so if Instagram is no longer part of Facebook, like, will it go back to just being like a photo sharing app and they'll stop trying to sell us everything and they'll remove shops from the bottom?

Like, they just got like so crazy.

And that's the Facebook effect.

No, you're 100% right.

Non-chronological timeline.

I don't know her.

Algorithm.

Instagram shop, even though I love using the feature on our Morning Toast shop.

If you're looking for a Morning Toast merch, head over over to shopmorning toast.com.

Hate the feature.

Like every fourth post ad, that's a Facebook feature.

Yeah.

But I also feel like Instagram became like a major platform because of Facebook's influence.

Yeah, you know,

and so all the things that annoy us, I guess, also contributed to its massive success.

Yeah.

Every time they change shit up, it's like so annoying for us, but it always in the long run, it sounds like really Big Brother like knows what they're doing, you know?

Yeah, but also we just like probably become accustomed to whatever change it is, even if it's not like most beneficial because we're addicted to these products.

Right, that's like Apple, like with all their new products.

Like it's so annoying, but like in the end, it's such an answer.

I know, but that actually feels like technology advancement.

Like they, you know what I mean?

Yes, yes, yes.

Okay, well, those were the fast five, and I feel like they were quite robust, and you definitely needed to know them.

You needed to know them.

I'm not going to lie.

Some days you really don't need to know them, but today you did.

And now let's dive into our TV recap.

We had double back-to-back housewives last night, OC, which is just getting worse and worse, and Salt Lake City, which is just getting better with every minute.

And we're going to dive into those recaps after today's sponsor, which is brought to you by Stamps.

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All right, let's go in order.

Real housewise of Orange County, blurry episode, Zoom episode.

Everyone coming for Elizabeth Vargas' throat, and I'm just like not fucking here for it.

Everyone on this show has lied more than anyone else, and now we're just like.

And complained and been divorced, and took years to get to the other side.

And honestly,

I just like...

I couldn't believe that Bronwyn stooped as low as she did as to look up someone's financial records.

Like,

she's just trying to be like Megan King Edmonds, who was like the PI of the Real Houses of Orange County.

And she was annoying when she did it, Megan King Edmonds, but she was always right.

And also she, she came with some big stuff.

Like to come with the fact that Elizabeth's house is on Airbnb or Verbo, like...

Like, that's so judgmental of you, especially when like you're all renting your home.

Right.

You're all renting.

So like, let's just.

You are the Airbnb customer.

Oh.

It's a pot calling the kettle black.

Yeah.

So I'm just like, it's like, there's really nothing going on this season.

And I think the women are like worried about being boring.

So they're just like coming for Elizabeth Vargas.

And like, yes, she's been a little inconsistent in like her map, but she doesn't owe these women anything.

And I just feel like they're all just accusing her of being this, like, evil person just for being, like, slightly inconsistent in her retelling of history as it pertains to her marriage.

When just like all these women have done so much worse to each other, and I'm just like, I'm not here for like this, yeah.

And honestly, the only people who are really, I feel like protecting Elizabeth Vargas is obviously Kelly because they're friends, but then weirdly, Gita, like at the last minute, like turning around, not going to Kelly's house, and then telling

Elizabeth what Bronwyn did.

I actually really appreciated that.

Definitely also, she told Elizabeth what what Bronwyn did.

Yeah.

It's just Shannon and Bronwyn.

Yeah.

So a few things about the episode.

First of all, you can really tell that all of the housewives are produced by different production companies because of the way that they're handling quarantine filming.

And like OC put so much emphasis on like day 10, day 20.

It was like the worst possible thing that we could have watched.

What we've been saying this whole time that we did not want to see.

Okay, but I also think that they,

of all the shows on Bravo, they were the worst timing.

The worst timing in terms of like being in the the midst of filming and then having to go out for three months.

Yes.

I agree with that.

But they spent the whole episode with like Zoom stuff.

And so, as it pertains to Elizabeth, so I didn't wind up watching last week.

And so, like, my OCD is flaring up, but I'm going to go off of what I saw last night because I agree with you.

I think they're being so hard on her and like not giving her like five minutes to process her

to process her divorce when like Shannon took five seasons.

Uh-huh.

Gina?

Gina's still processing it.

It's so hypocritical.

So hypocritical.

And I think.

But Gina did apologize, which I think Gina like saw her own hypocrisy yeah and did apologize over the zoom and i forgive her and i and i can move on from it i think that bronwen one bringing up those financial records and also like now that she's had like a few good weeks is like being like well like she's being an ass judgmental she was like on my first season i was lying like she thinks that she's like godly now that she can like see just who she was for the last year and it's like that's really great that you're in that place but to turn around and like use it against someone else is actually the worst and meanest thing you could do 100 and you know what i'm really struggling with how to feel about Bronwyn because so much of what I feel like she's putting out is like so authentic.

And I really appreciate her transparency in her journey.

But I do feel like she's being a little too honest.

And like when she shared that she has physically assaulted her husband, like

that's just like not okay.

And like that's definitely something you should keep to yourself.

Yeah, I agree.

I appreciate her being honest in front of the cameras.

I think that like when you come on the show, it's like the one requirement and she is giving us so much.

But I also feel like there are so many things, it's like, even, I mean, just sharing that detail that she had physically assaulted her husband on multiple

occasions, and then just moving on from that.

Yeah, it just, it, I didn't know how to feel about it.

Yeah, and then also like her going into the closet and talking about how she feels trapped in her marriage, like and trapped, like, and just it's a little too honest.

Yeah, it's like, it's not the Bronwyn and Sean reality family show.

And so, like, to go from those moments to like back to the girls and then Bronwyn's going and like casting judgment on Elizabeth's life.

I'm like, there's a lot.

It's a lot.

I agree.

And you know what?

I actually don't think it's funny when like grown women don't know how to do laundry.

I actually think it's like one of the like least funny, most annoying things.

And it's like, Bronwyn, you're 45 years old and you have seven kids and you don't know how to do laundry.

Like that's not funny TV content.

That's actually just embarrassing.

Yeah.

And it's like, it's just not funny.

Like, I don't think shit like that.

That's funny.

Grown women or men.

Like the laundry machine.

Sorry, yes.

I don't mean to.

No, I didn't think that you were.

The laundry machine is a very simple, simple machine.

No, and it's like you literally need it to live.

So, I don't know how anyone could go 45 years without knowing how to at least do one load.

Okay, I understand you're not doing laundry every week.

You have a housekeeper.

That is so acceptable.

But, like, to not literally know how to use a machine, she was definitely like trying to be funny.

I didn't believe that she didn't know, is it a heavy load or a low load?

Like, that was just so stupid.

I hate you like that.

No, in the one episode that I missed, like, my feelings on Bronwyn have started to really change.

And I don't know if it would have been like less of a drastic shift if I watched last week's episode, but I just, I was so, I, she's been so open and honest, and I think it's admirable and it's so admirable But then to use those learnings and to use them against someone else I just think that it's mean and that's not real growth.

Yeah, I totally agree um also I found it I didn't like she was also being really judgmental to Kelly so Kelly is like running around town This is the beginning of COVID flying to New York and you would think okay Bronwyn's gonna judge Kelly.

What are you gonna judge Kelly on like maybe not taking the the pandemic seriously, like flying in the middle of a lockdown?

No, she's judging Kelly for leaving her kid at home No, not at home, with her father while she's with Rick.

And it's like, actually, no, Bronin, I don't agree with you on that.

First of all, the kid has two parents.

And that's like when people give Amanda Stanton shit, like for like traveling, it's like, no, the kid has a parent, like another parent.

And the kid would be with that parent and then Kelly would be alone.

So she has these two, she had one week to herself.

What is she going to do?

She'd be with her man.

Yeah.

So it was just like who's also alone.

Bronman, like just being so judgmental.

I'd never leave my kids at home alone.

And then I love like seeing people on Twitter like

Bronwin said, I would never leave my kids at home.

No, she said, I would never leave my kids in the middle of a global pandemic.

Right.

And cut to like, if you look at her Instagram, she's been like, oh, she went to Salt Lake City.

She went to New York.

She went to DC.

She's been with like housewives from every franchise over the last eight months, which I've actually seen and I thought was interesting and strange, but it's even stranger coupled with the judgment that she cast on Kelly for traveling.

Yeah.

Now, on a lighter note,

I do think that the pandemic and quarantine is so good for Gina because her extensions are out.

Yeah.

And her hair is just like not getting blown out, no heat, no bleach, and it's really letting it grow.

Because then in her testimonial, she's

not wearing extensions.

It looks like her hair has grown a little bit and it looks very healthy.

And I just want to say, I'm very excited about the prospect of Gina's hair, you know, having a good day.

But I'm nervous because I saw a comment on Instagram where she said that her hair, like get...

brace yourself because her hair is going to get worse this season.

It was from a few weeks ago.

And so I feel like maybe when the salons open back up, she gets a little too excited.

Yeah, that's bad.

And I'm nervous.

That's bad.

But I agree with you.

Like seeing her short hair like there's nothing you could do for your hair that's better than just leaving it chopping it off and just not touching it like no heat and no no coloring and I just I think this is very exciting I think it could be very good for her yeah also

sorry you go Shannon yeah like having that like meeting like first day back and we're just gonna like come in with all the things people have been DMing us about Elizabeth over the last three months.

Also her being like, I have PIs.

Like, no, you have people who are sending you Instagram DMs.

Yeah, it's not, it's not that impressive.

Also, I do feel really bad for Shannon because she's taking the virus so seriously because she's immunocompromised.

But I also feel like she's

really like panicky in the sense that like she's like her kids look up to her.

She has so many people in her house and I feel like she's like making everyone scared.

Do you know what I mean?

Yes, I do.

What's the word I'm looking for?

Like where you're just...

Hypochondriac?

No, but it's like you're inducing like...

Where you're like a mom is supposed to calm everyone down and she's like making everyone so nuts.

Yeah, like almost like not instigating but like like inciting fear.

Like yes.

You know what I mean?

I do know what you mean.

And I'm like, I'm like on the phone just like screaming crying it's like i understand that it's scary and that you have some more to lose and you're and i totally get that but she worries me no i agree and i understand she was in her home and she had these very strict rules and i think that's very fair but like when her daughter tested positive and she's on the phone like hyperventilating screaming crying to kelly and i was almost like mad at her child like for getting sick well her kids were being irresponsible running out of the house when they when they have a mom who's very at at risk and you're running to a party like in the middle like that wasn't cool yeah no it wasn't cool but like that's just the way that she was handling it and also like when they flash back to all of the other times where she's overreacted yes about stuff my left eye is blurry

it just it's like calm down shannon she was really being a karen like yeah she is the karen yeah no and i thought that way i felt that way about like her at costco she's just what you said last week and i totally saw just the way that she like her she's on such high alert and by the way and that's not to say like what's going on isn't scary it total and especially at in march it was very scary especially for someone with a lung problem I just feel like you know as like the leader of her household she really just needs to like take it easy yeah she's that's like not a way to live is to like be so panicked

and make everyone else so panic too yes um

also just Emily just remains the queen of my heart and soul watching her and Shane like have a great few months together was so nice and I really think they're so cute.

It's just so funny because it really shows like how reality TV editing can make it look one way or the other because it's like we're now at two extremes.

One where it was like this marriage isn't going to last.

And now it's like, they're so cute.

He's vacuuming, you know?

Yeah.

I actually just really like them.

And I feel like they've editing has like left him alone this season and like he just doesn't really get involved.

And I think it's really good for their marriage.

And I'm just like, I'm so happily, happy for Emily.

Yes, I agree.

So other than that, I was just like...

having PTSD.

I was having so much PTSD also from like the different stages of like information that we knew.

Like even when Kelly was in Times Square and obviously she's not wearing a mask, but that was because that was a time when like you were encouraged not to wear masks.

When the women met up in the park, and I'm like, girls, put your masks on.

But it was literally like April, and that was when there was like a shortage of masks.

And if you were wearing one, that was like a huge.

You were taking one away from someone who needed it more than you.

So like just watching how our

culture and like the information that we have has changed over time.

It was just like, it was definitely bringing me back to a dark place, not gonna lie.

Yeah, it was very dark.

And I'm just really looking forward to like them

being out of quarantine and like

Let's go to Lake Arrow.

Lake Arrowhead.

That's great.

Can't wait.

Now, let's just transition to like the literal premiere franchise, like the diamond in Bravo's portfolio, real house-wise of Salt Lake City, which last night, again, didn't disappoint, never does, never could.

Love the women so much.

The luncheon, we picked up part two of the luncheon, and things definitely got weird.

I, at first, was really on Mary's side,

and now I've completely turned on Mary.

Literally, that's the thing about Salt Lake City.

It's like in the beginning, I was so unclear on who I like, and now most of I've settled in on who I like but Mary and Jen I just

the thing about a new franchise like we're still not cemented in our feelings about people and I agree I was on Mary's side and then she couldn't she couldn't accept and maybe there were things that we didn't see at the table because I was watching Watch What Happens Live with Lisa and Meredith and obviously I think there was way more conversation but like part of

being like right is accepting an apology and moving on.

No, but see I was with Mary until a certain point because Mary didn't get an an apology.

Meredith did.

Yes, yes.

So it's like all Jen, I could tell, like, Mary was annoyed.

It's like, you're going to have this kumbaya moment and not even acknowledge me and not even give me an apology.

And this is my luncheon.

And I just gave you Louisiana.

So it's like, I understood.

But then she just took it to a place that was unacceptable.

Right.

And so the lunch went sideways and I don't think it accomplished what, I think it started out really nice and it didn't accomplish what it set out to.

But what I was saying about opinions changing about people, like I'm on this journey with Lisa.

Yeah.

Because when I watched the first episode, I was like, I think she's going to be one of my favorites.

And then I saw her on Watch What Happens Live.

And I'm like, no, she wants this too bad.

But then in the last few episodes, like her crying with Merrill

and her, like, just talking, like, in some of the conversations with her husband, I'm like, there's something really sweet and endearing about her.

And I feel like she's a good friend.

But then also, I don't like the way that she treats Whitney or Heather.

She's definitely like a little bit of a thirst monster with her emphasis on Sundance.

Right.

And so like, I was feeling really conflicted, but I was starting to feel like, you know what?

I want to make it work.

I want to make it work.

And so her and Meredith were on Watch What Happens Live.

And so I was like, I want to watch her on Watch What Happens Live.

Maybe it will undo the opinion of the last Watch What Happens Live.

And she, like, first of all, the two of them like looked amazing.

They were so cute.

Meredith cut her hair.

So now it's like way easier to tell them apart.

Meredith did amazing on Watch What Happens Live.

I just want to say, like, Andy had really only questions for her.

And like, she just explained everything

so like concisely because obviously she doesn't have like an infinite amount of time and just has an answer for everything and I just was really impressed by her.

I watched the first first 10 minutes and i agree meredith is a queen lisa was being a cutie and i was just like okay and she seemed a little nervous so i was like okay cute cute and then andy asked them has your life how has life changed for you since joining the show like are is it different in salt lake city now like what is it like in the town And they were both like silent for a second.

And Lisa was like, I don't think it's really changed that much, but I love being on the show.

And it was like, so

weird question.

It was so weird.

Why not acknowledge?

I'm sure Salt Lake City is turned upside down by.

She was like, I'm so happy to be on the show.

And it was like the exact thing that I've been worried about with her.

Yeah.

I don't know.

I felt like Andy felt it too.

I swear.

No, Andy is like, Andy, probably more than anyone gets inundated with like Thirst Monster Generals at that point.

He turns a corner.

I think he had a moment where he was like, what have we done?

What have we done?

Yeah.

And then Meredith answered and she was like, Yeah, no, I'm definitely way busier.

This is like a full-time job and a half.

And

everyone knows who we are.

People come up to us and recognize us.

And so she was just like, honest.

And it just like, it was a glimpse that I just could have lived with.

Like, to not acknowledge that, like, you were nobody before is like, that's worrisome.

Yeah.

And so you should watch it just because it was just like a weird thing.

And I really, I do want to, I'm liking her on the show, so I'm just going to try and go by that.

And I feel like she's so cute and pretty.

Like, what's not to lie.

And I, but I do need her to come around to Whitney and Heather because I'm just obsessed with them.

I think Whitney is

so cute.

Next week, Lala, Ken, and Katie Maloney.

Oh, my God.

Yes.

What?

Lala and Whitney, I guess, are friends from Utah life because Lala's 28, 29, and 10.

So I'm so excited for that.

By the way, in another life, I know we keep saying we could see

that we could see Lala on Real House Eyes of Beverly Hills.

We could also see her now on Real House Eyes of Salt Lake City.

Yeah.

Wait, that's so interesting.

When they showed the preview, I was shook.

I'm so excited.

And it does feel like Sunday and it's like Lisa is going to be annoying.

But maybe we'll see her in her Element M will feel differently.

Jerry's still out for me on all of the women because, again, like my opinion really did change on the drama between Mary and Jen last year.

Yeah, because the 7-Eleven comment was so bizarre.

Yeah.

And honestly, Jensha's husband, like, everyone needs a husband like Jensha.

Like, someone who just fucking grounds you and like is so

ethical.

And in, like, he talks to her, like, probably how he talks to his college team, like, just trying to, like, put them on the right path.

And I don't know.

I feel like everyone needs someone like that in their corner.

And I feel like she actually has a really good marriage.

Ain't it good to be the coach?

Ain't it good to be the coach?

That's literally that energy.

Like, she is

Connie Britton.

Connie Britton, and he's Coach Taylor.

Yeah.

And he's just like spitting truth.

But I do have to say, like, Mary, I was really turned off on her, especially by the 7-Eleven comment.

And just like her general unwillingness to stay in a conversation.

Do you know what I mean?

She's like kind of messy and all over the place.

But when she sat down for dinner drinks with Heather and started talking about why the comment about grandmother fucker, grandfather fucker was like so hurtful and she started to cry.

Like, I really, like, I feel like there's a lot we don't don't know.

And, like, even just her like saying on TV, like, when I had to marry my grandfather, like, I really didn't want to.

Like, making it seem like, obviously, I don't think that this is normal, but it's my life and just like respect it.

Yeah.

I actually felt really bad for that.

And also, it's not like she married her grandpa last year.

Like, it has been 20 years of

grandpa loving.

Yeah.

And so, just like.

Step grandpa loving.

Yeah.

So let it go, one.

But two, I also feel like, and maybe we missed this, but Mary should have brought that energy to her luncheon where she asked everyone to be honest.

And she could have said to Jen, like, instead of waiting for the apology, she could have said to Jen, this is why it hurt me.

You said this about me.

And by the way, Jen said it

about her, not to her.

So maybe in Jen's mind, she doesn't know that Mary heard it.

Maybe.

So if Mary came to her and said, I heard that you said I'm a grandfather fucker, and I just want to tell you why that hurts me so much.

Here is my story.

Right.

Maybe they could have seen each other.

Like everyone showed up to the luncheon and Mary told everyone to be open and honest.

And Mary just showed up defensive.

And that's just not a good combination.

And that's why it it was so toxic.

Yeah.

Or maybe like they hadn't gotten to Mary yet because it felt like they were starting at the other end of the table.

They didn't get to anyone.

They started with Jen.

No, they had Lisa who was like talking about her, like

her, all of her success.

And then Heather was talking about something.

And then Jen.

And that's where last week's episode ended.

I want to talk about Heather for a second.

Okay.

I actually feel like Heather is like such a good mom.

And I really appreciated her refreshing take on like religion and motherhood, like just letting the kids are now like old enough.

to make their own decisions and like letting them guide the way, like not forcing them to go to church, not forcing them not to go to church.

She's like, you You want to go?

I'll go with you, but you don't want to go.

We don't have to go.

I just felt like that was very refreshing.

I really appreciated seeing that.

And when her kids were like worried about what people would say, like when they do eventually show up, and she was like, Well, that's not a reason to go or not to go.

Like, go because it was in your heart or don't.

Her younger daughter was funny as fuck.

Like, she, she's a character.

She's honestly like, I feel like even though I love her so much, Meredith's son, like, is so thirsty.

And I feel like he comes on the show and, like, wants to be memed.

Whereas, like, Heather's daughter just, like, accidentally was the star of last night's episode, and Brooks is like quaking in his house.

Like, he's so angry you know I totally agree and next week with the fashion show like I'm sorry anytime there's a real housewives season one fashion show it's not good it's not good but it's also a rite of passage like it's if if you're not at like some janky you know studio space with like a fake stage making the first ever Salt Lake City fashion week, like that's not a real franchise.

So I do feel like it will be cringy, but it is truly a rite of passage.

I agree, but I totally agree that Brooks is thirsty.

He's annoying me now.

At first, I thought it it was funny, now he's annoying me.

And that's what I'm saying.

Especially after seeing Jen Shaw in episode one wearing his designs and supporting him.

And now he's like a housewife.

Like he's talking shit.

She's fucking wearing your clothes.

And she wears the best, like Chanel, everything.

100%.

That was disrespectful.

Also, Mary's outfit to dinner with Heather.

Mary's outfits are all over the place, but...

But this is what actually Lisa said on Watch What Happens Live because she has great pieces.

She has great pieces, which she very much does.

Yes, I agree.

Okay, well, that's all we got for you.

Anything you want to say before we wrap up?

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