S3 Ep188: The One With Bruno: Friday, November 13th, 2020

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Good morning, millennials.

Welcome back to the morning toast.

Happy Friday, Friday.

Gotta get down on Friday.

It is obviously Friday, which is normally like a super joyous occasion, but we are being blessed in the studio with the presence of Bruno.

Bruno Sweets is here.

First time ever.

I said I was going to try and bring him this week, and then it was Friday, and I was like, I'm a woman of my word.

Bruno, let's go.

It's really hard.

Like, I do not envy.

We used to have this with Theo.

It's like the running around, the pooping.

It's like it's a full-time job when you're literally trying to do your full-time job.

Right.

He got here.

He needed to poop.

I could like tell he was about to go right, you know, right where Theo looked back at it yesterday.

She could stay in right between our feet.

So I took him over yonder.

I put down a paper towel.

I was like, let's see how smart this guy is.

Pooped right on the paper towel, right in the trash.

And now he's like, he's, he's as good as you can ask for a puppy.

I did

like now need to kill myself because I stepped on his foot with my big fucking boots.

And he was just like, I didn't even know he was behind me.

And like, now I'm sorry, I have to die.

So this will be my last show.

I know.

You know, he really gets underfoot.

And

that little yelp.

It's happened to me so many times that, like, I don't fault you.

That little yelp though, like, sends me to a dark place.

Like,

and you know what?

I feel like one day

it'll happen to him so when it actually really hurts so bad, and he'll learn something from it and he'll stop getting under foot.

Oh, no, that's see, that's the difference.

And this is what me and Ben always say.

It's like, we love Theo so much, but like, it is frustrating to love something so much, and they can really never tell you that they love you back, or speak, or learn.

And it's frustrating, and that's the difference between like the love you have for a baby and the love you have for a dog.

It's like the baby eventually, like, learns to grow up and like the dog just doesn't.

Yeah, but he learned some things.

Like Theo's a second genius.

He became a doctor and he can't even, you know, technically communicate with the patient.

Right.

And he has no borders.

No, he has no borders.

He's such a great man.

I mean, it's a shame that in order for Bruno to be here, I meant that Theo had to take the day off, especially considering he stole the show yesterday.

We had no idea.

By the way, he got a haircut last night just for today's show.

Sickening.

But if we brought both of the dogs, it would have been pandemonium.

But you know what?

One day they'll be in a a place where they can do that, and we'll just have like our whole litter here at the show.

Maybe Knolls will be coming too,

and that's like been our dream.

Yeah, it has.

Um, so today's obviously exciting for a multitude of reasons: Bruno Friday, but also we are able to not announce quite yet, but give you a little sneak peek at our holiday merch collection, which is coming and you will have your items

in time for the holidays.

I'm just taking a sip of my coffee, aka Diet Pepsi, from our new toasty mug.

That's Claudia, that's beautiful.

And I'm just gonna send some text messages from my new phone case.

I haven't had a phone case in months.

I'm literally so excited about this phone case.

And maybe I'll send some texts from your phone too, Claudia.

Ooh, spooky phone cases.

We're really excited.

We have new sweatshirts, we have new accessories.

We have a new stuff coming.

I'll take my phone back now that you did your little commercial.

Really exciting stuff.

So make sure you are just keeping up with the toast on Instagram and listening to the podcast to find out when you can get your merch and how.

Launch dates.

We'll show you the exclusives.

That's just a little taste.

We wanted to give you a taste because we've been seeing so many comments of people hearing.

And so we just want to let you know it's on the way.

There's a taste.

Whet your whistle.

We are all over it, just like we're all over everything, like the Fast Fact Stories.

Today we have Keeping Up with the Kardashians and Southern Charm recaps coming at you, the season finale of Keeping Up with the Kardashians.

Last night was such a pleasure watching two episodes of good television and then having the night to myself.

I actually started a book, which I haven't read a book that's not for the Redheads since, I guess, Mariah Carrie, but still, that's been like a month.

You know,

I really hadn't read in so long, but I'm reading my new, my second favorite author.

I said last night on Instagram, she's my favorite author, but she's my second favorite, because my first favorite's Claudia Austray.

Oh, yes.

Did I not mention that I am a published author starting January 26th, 2021?

You know, usually it's like, oh, great, Jaggie's talking about her books again.

Like, I could just like days out.

But now I'm like, oh, an opportunity for me to promote my book, Girl with No Job, The Crazy Beautiful Life of an Instagram Thirst Monster, now available at many, many retailers like Barnes and Noble, Amazon, tons of places.

Audiobooks are available for pre-order.

E-books are available for pre-order.

And I would really appreciate all the possible pre-orders because I have a goal.

And I know a lot of people have goals when it comes to books, but mine is to get into the airport because I just feel like that's a chic aesthetic.

And I can't really get into the airport, I think, unless I have like lots of pre-orders because they're like, oh my God, this girl, she's so popular.

She's so famous.

We got to put her in the Hudson News or MSNBC store.

So I need you guys just to head over over to girlwithnojob.com slash book or tap the link in my bio on Instagram.

Tons of retailers, Canadian toasters.

I got you guys too.

Maybe I can get to the Canadian airports.

All the links are in the link in my bio.

Check it out.

Thanks.

I'm done promoting for the day.

Very, very good.

So yeah, I'm just so excited that it's Friday.

Me too.

It's been a big week.

Yeah, it's been

a tough one.

I'm not going to lie.

I just feel like at this point, like being alive is tough.

It is.

So I can't really say that there was anything like different or particularly challenging about this week, but just life, man.

It's fucking hard.

It is.

But I have Bruno Sweets in my life now, and he has just been like the biggest blessing.

It's so wonderful.

So much work, like, not going to lie.

So my whole life is changed, but it's worth every minute, you know?

And that does go away.

Like, it's just so important to keep that in mind.

When it's like the puppy months and you're like, oh my God, like I need to give this dog up.

Like, just always keep in mind, like, the toughs, like, that goes away.

And that's easy for me to remember because I see Theo and I'm like,

this is a perfect man.

This is what's possible.

This is a dream.

So, he is a perfect man.

And he also, like, even though he's a puppy and he has energy and this and that, he can be annoying sometimes.

Like, he's really the best thing.

Like, he's the sweetest, sweetest thing.

That's why he's called Bruno Sweets.

I call him Bruno Ocasio-Cortez.

I don't know why, but it just really is.

No, it's because we say Bruno Suites, Nitsprezo Fachem and Odazio.

El Vazio.

So then I'm like,

I'm like, Odazio-Cortez.

Bruno Odazio-Cortez.

So that's where I'm going with the nickname.

And that's that on that.

He's named after all the Nisprezzo flavors.

Right.

And that's why it's inspired by me.

Dormio.

Strachatelli.

Odazio is my favorite Nisprezzo flavor.

Nespresso.

Nespresso.

Oh my gosh, he's burrowing.

I'm sorry.

Oh, my God.

I thought he was peeing on your life.

I'm sorry if he's making a lot of noise today, you guys.

Like, this is, I won't bring him again for a while, but I said I would bring him this week.

People were asking.

She's a woman of her word.

I didn't want to let people down, you know?

No, that's not what we do here.

We lift people up.

And if you're listening as a podcast and bruno's bothering you then head over to youtube because then the noises will match with the actions yeah he's being so cute it's like hard to even be upset it is hard to be upset but we have a don't worry i'll get there no kidding can you hear him like just furrowing at his bully stick no he's totally fine he's the sweetest thing um we have a great show we do and i think we should get right into it because bruno's like never seen his mother at work before wow he's gonna be like so proud of you oh my god i hope so i hope i can make you proud

so without further ado oh my god i'm already fucking up

Without further ado, it is time for the fast five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

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First story, the big story of the day.

The weekend is set to headline the 2021 Super Bowl halftime show.

He says, I'm humbled, honored, and ecstatic.

The news dropped yesterday that the weekend will be headlining the halftime show at the Super Bowl LV.

I think that's 55 on February 7th in Tampa Bay, Florida.

So we'll get to whether or not we think this is a good selection, but I just have to say, I thought that the

announcement for this was like so low-key and weird.

Like he just posted a picture on his Instagram.

Like there was no like...

Hype.

I feel like usually this time last year, like we're always talking about like it's going to be announced soon.

And like there's articles written like top five choices there was just like no hype or buzz around this and then like i saw him on instagram i thought he got hacked by like a pepsi sponsor it was just it was very bizarre marketing got it i heard the news from zach like he saw it on his phone and then told me so i didn't have to deal with like the way that it was delivered to me but yeah i do agree it was very low fanfare quiet

pretty quiet and I'm curious to hear what you think about the choice.

I think The Weekend is an amazing artist.

I wouldn't have chosen him for the Super Bowl just based on what we, what you, the criteria, the usual criteria for the Super Bowl, which is like albums and albums of, and catalogs of music, you know, an artist that sort of bridges generations.

I think that he's an amazing talent.

I think a lot of people will be blown away by the show that he does put on, but I do think that there are some people who might not even know who he is.

That's possible, but I do want to say, like, that

criteria that the Super Bowl has had for like years is actually, they are running out of people like Beyonce's literally done it like five times in the last 10 years Coldplay Bruno Mars like they are running out of people so like their criteria is actually really strict like and I don't know how much longer they can go on

many artists that bridge generations right and have catalogs and catalogs of music so so now they're choosing contemporary artists that I personally think have the like the talent and the chops to entertain everyone.

Yeah.

So even if you didn't know this person or their music before, I mean, I think he has so many hits that like it'll, you know,

ring a bell for people.

But even if you weren't like a major fan before, you will become one.

And I actually do think, not that there's tons of like older people listening to the weekend, but his music style and sound, I can't feel my face.

It's very like Michael Jackson.

Like, I actually think...

Blinding Light is like an amazing song.

And it's very...

It's

temporary, but it's universal.

So I actually think this is a very good choice.

And I also think like given the year we're coming off of, especially with like so much controversy in the NFL, like to have a black performer is wonderful.

So, I actually, I wouldn't have ever chose him, but I'm not mad about it.

I'm not mad about it.

I was definitely surprised by the choice, but the more that I think about it, I think it's like a new direction

for the halftime show, which is, I'm always here for a new direction.

Yeah, and I'm always here for the new direction.

And you know what?

If One Direction wants to come on with the weekend, like I would imagine.

And if the Glee Club wants to come on with a different

teacher other than Mr.

Shu.

Well, can I just say I think that this halftime show, and usually they do bring on like a second or third act.

I think it should be the weekend and the new directions.

I mean, honestly, like at the peak of Glee, the fact that like they never did the halftime show, like it would have been iconic.

They bridge generations.

They sing songs from all different decades.

Like I actually think like all jokes aside, at the height of Glee's fame.

If they had come on or on tour, if they had come on, it wouldn't have been crazy, but I'm not like shocked that nobody asked me.

No, but but like it would have been iconic.

Like truly.

But can I just say like earlier in the week we reported that Matthew Morrison is going to be the Grinch on the NBC's reenactment of The Grinch, blah, blah, blah.

And while the news was obviously devastating for us in the

Matthew Morrison is a war criminal fan club.

Can I just say the content like that's now being pushed around because he's back in the news is so funny.

And people are just like tagging me and like Matthew Morrison is being cringy TikToks.

So while I'm upset that he is going to ruin Christmas, I'm actually glad because it brought us all this content.

Right.

And it's really bringing the Matthew Morrison haters together.

Yeah.

No, we are a strong united friend.

And people reached out to me just saying, you know, you know, I can't really talk about this with any of my friends.

And just like hearing you on the podcast made me feel like less alone.

And I just, that's what I always want to be for people is, is a voice to the voiceless.

Yeah.

And I feel like.

That's beautiful.

We are.

Yeah.

So this is.

I wonder, sorry, if all the backlash on Matthew Morrison being announced as the Grinch, like has made NBC reconsider.

No, I think there's already like a trailer out for it.

Like, I think it's happening.

It's too late.

It's too late.

Sucks.

But I think it's good for them, too.

Like, you know,

people are talking.

That's true.

And so that's always true.

That's always what you want.

Like, people are talking about the weekend.

And I think it'll be exciting.

And also, I'm going to assume that he's going to bring at least one other person or artist or group out.

Who does he collabs with?

Like, on his songs?

Maybe that's Ariana Grande.

They have one song, but it's her.

Oh, but that's like Lily old song.

I know, but you never know.

No, that'd be cool.

Yeah.

Has Ari ever done it?

No.

That's weird.

Yeah, but she's another one who's like, I could see her one day doing it, but I think right now it would be a very contemporary choice.

See, no, I think maybe that's the problem that they have.

And like...

Ariana Grande should be the one to do it.

She's the biggest pop star in the world.

So if she doesn't fit their criteria, like your criteria sucks.

Like make some changes.

And I actually think that they are.

Because there are only so many Lady Gagas.

There are only so many Beyoncés, Bruno Mars, like once in a generation.

And who also happen to have pop music.

Because Adele could do it, but like everyone would be crying.

Yeah, totally.

He's about to make a leap for it.

Oh, Bruno.

Bruno.

Bruno.

What do you think about this news?

He's like, my namesake, Bruno Mars, should be there once again.

I mean, again, if Bruno Mars did it every year, I would literally be the biggest fan of football.

No, totally.

But the weekend put out a statement saying we all grow up watching the world's biggest acts, playing the Super Bowl, and one can only dream of being in that position.

I'm humbled, honored, and ecstatic to be the center of that infamous stage this year.

So beautiful.

Beautiful.

That's very well said.

Also, Jay-Z, who was tasked by the NFL with advising on musical events, said in a press release: The weekend has a sound all his own.

His soulful uniqueness has defined a new generation of greatness in music and artistry.

This is an extraordinary moment in time, and the Pepsi Super Bowl LV halftime show, Louis Vuitton halftime show, is going to be an extraordinary experience with an extraordinary performer.

Facts.

You know what I just thought?

Why does the Super Bowl halftime performer have to be pop?

If you think of the demographic of people who watch football in America, like probably a majority country music fans, more so than pop.

And you know, now that I'm thinking about it, I know I slate him for everything, but like Luke Holmes should be the halftime performer.

Like that actually makes sense.

Yeah, no, it's weird that there's been a country performer in a while, but I.

Poody and the Blowfish.

Yeah,

that's true.

Like I'm just thinking, like,

we're very.

I feel like there are are other genres.

Like, they do hip-hop, they do rock.

You know, we had red hot chili peppers.

So they do, they do everything except country.

Yeah.

It would appear as though.

Yeah, but then Carrie Underwood sings, oh, you like the microphone.

Oh,

Sunday night.

Oh,

Sunday night.

Sit on the boat, Sunday.

I beat, stop clapping.

Got a real good feeling.

Something not about to happen.

Oh,

Turn on the boat, Sunday, I beat, stop cracking.

A real good feeling, Sunday night about to happen.

Such a good commercial.

Wake up in the morning, don't know what happened.

Oh, you love to hear Mummy sing.

Oh, Sunday night.

Beautiful.

Oh,

Sunday night.

Okay, we're done.

I think this is a good choice.

This is always just like this time of year where we're selecting and talking about this.

Always makes for interesting conversation.

And it's interesting to see what has happened in the last year because

I think last year we said like Ariana Grande would be great.

And this year, like she would be great too.

Yeah.

But I also, yeah, I think she would be great.

I think she'll probably do it one day.

But you know what?

Just like San Francisco, like this is not her year.

No, it's not her year.

Okay, ready for our next story?

Yes, me.

Real house eyes of New York star Ramona Singer is getting a new job.

Yes, this is actually very exciting.

Oh, he's biting me.

Crazy pants.

He's going crazy.

Ramona Singer is moving on from branded Prino Regio and skincare to selling high-end real estate.

The bubbly blonde is studying for her New York real estate license, a source told Gimme Shelter.

She doesn't have it yet, but when she does, she is slated to join Michael Lorber's star team at Douglas Ellman.

So I know a lot of people are probably like confused like why she's getting a job in real estate.

She's a reality star, but I think most people who watch the show can agree that Ramona's time is almost up.

And the show has been her life for so long.

And when you watch season one, she had a successful business, like reselling wholesale discounted, whatever.

She had like some job in fashion.

She had her own business and it was actually quite successful.

And she obviously has stopped doing that and the show became her life.

And I think her income is 100% reliant on the show.

And that's a very vulnerable place to be in because I do think her time is up.

So her having a job, she's very personable.

She's a realist.

She's a gal about town.

I actually think this is a great job for her and very smart of her to be forward-thinking about what happens after Housewives.

Yes, and I think she's going to be an amazing real estate agent.

I always say, like,

you always say

the job you'd be worst at in this world, I think for me would be a real estate agent.

But I think for Ramona, she's so personable.

She actually, you know, she appreciates real estate.

She's always talking about houses and showing off her friends' houses.

I think she'll be perfect at this.

But I also think it's a good storyline for her on the show.

I don't know if she's planning for post-show life.

She's also 60, like well into her 60s.

I guess now

she could retire.

Oh, Bruno looks like he's about to do some bidness.

But I also, oh, he's circling in a pink.

Oh, God.

Should I go deal with him?

Do you want to?

Oh, God.

Oh God.

Bruno, Bruno.

All right, you know what?

Maybe it's time for a song.

Yes, please.

Honestly, we're going to have a good time.

That's what it ends up to the sky.

We're going to get toasted tonight.

You know what song I've really been actually into?

Is Blue Bird?

What's it called?

Blue Bird by Miranda Lambert.

How does it go?

And if the house just keeps on winning, I got a wild card up my sleeve.

And if love keeps giving me lemons, I just mix them in my drink.

Oh, you're back.

Sorry.

That's Claudia.

That's beautiful.

Yeah, no, I found a little.

I locked.

put him in the kitchen.

You put him in the closet?

Okay.

No, I put him in the kitchen.

I shut the door.

Bruno's crying.

He's crying.

Back to Ramona Singer.

I actually think this is great for her.

Like, it just makes a lot of of sense.

Some people are born for certain jobs.

And I think Ramona Singer was meant to be like a real estate tycoon.

I totally agree.

I could just see her padding around.

She should be on selling Sunset next if this doesn't work out.

I actually don't think Ramona could

cut it.

Could compete.

Yeah.

I don't know.

I don't know about her.

Never underestimate Ramona Singer.

Never do it.

Okay, next story.

Some exciting news.

You can rent the Bachelor Mansion on Airbnb for $6,000 a night.

I saw.

That's kind of shocking.

Yeah.

Well, it's always shocking to me when I remember that ABC actually doesn't own this house.

They rent it every year for a certain amount of months from like a family who owns it.

It's like a nice family.

Yes, the home is called the Villa de la Vina.

It's known on the show as Bachelor Mansion.

It's used as the primary location for filming The Bachelor and The Bachelorette.

But due to the coronavirus pandemic, neither show is using the mansion right now.

Instead, they're filming at La Quinta Resort in Palm Springs, California.

I guess opening it up to people renting it.

Also, Matt James's upcoming season of The Bachelor is currently underway and is rumored to be located in Pennsylvania.

I wonder where they're filming.

Maybe Nima Colin.

Oh, I did see that a lot of Bachelor people were there.

At Nima Colin?

Oh, yeah, that's what I just clicked the...

hyperlink and Reality Steve is saying that they have been posting about Nima Colin Woodlands Resort, which they went to Unreal House of Potomac also, and it looks incredibly beautiful.

And I look forward to a change of scenery from La Quinto.

I do too, but Pennsylvania does seem like a random choice.

I wonder why they wouldn't just film the entire season at Bachelor Mansion.

Yeah, I mean, it's just, I mean, it's on,

it's so small.

Where do you do the dates?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's nothing.

In the driveway?

Yeah, I don't know.

That's, that's very true.

Yeah.

Well, I mean, this is pretty cool.

$6,000 a night seems pretty steep.

Yeah, it does.

But that's probably like a fun thing, a fun thing to do with your friends.

Like a bachelor party at Bachelor Mansion.

No, totally 16 girls.

What's 6,000 divided by 16?

Like if you have Bruno, I can't.

If you have like a big bachelorette party.

Okay, I'm doing it on my phone.

A little quick math with my new phone case.

It's $375 a night.

Per person.

So say we'll go two nights, $7.50 per person for two nights at the Bachelor Mansion.

You could also have like 30 people because that's what like they start with.

Plus to the crew.

No, and the bedrooms in Bachelor Mansion, I think they all have...

Bug beds like it's literally built for a house for 50 people.

Oh my god, we could do like a Camp Toast Bachelor Mansion.

Oh, that's a good idea.

That's really funny.

We should go.

Oh my god, Bruno just tried to fucking bite me.

Oh, yeah, he's crazy pants.

Hi, sweets.

Do you want to stick?

Oh, you want to stick it.

Bruno Switzer is the Swedish man.

The Swedish men.

It's Bruno

Sweets.

Oh, Bruno Sweets loves his auntie.

And that's just your outfit today.

He does love his auntie.

Ow, okay.

He's just like his cousin.

No.

Bruno, no.

He does bite a lot.

I don't know what to do.

Magnolia did, and so did Theo.

It's very normal, but because his teeth are like little baby teeth, they don't actually hurt.

I think he got one of the caps of my coffee cup.

Let's see.

Oh, yeah, there it is.

Bruno.

Y'all, just pray for us today, okay?

It's a busy day.

Let's maybe keep moving.

You know, I know.

I'm trying to.

I need to wrap this up.

I'm trying.

Okay, next up, Lamar Odom and Sabrina Parr have reunited to celebrate the one-year anniversary of their engagement.

It's just like not how breakups work.

After splitting.

So the two of them are spending time together one week after announcing that she had broken off their engagement.

On Wednesday night, she posted a selfie with Lamar kissing her cheek on Instagram stories, writing in the caption, made it in time to celebrate our one-year engagement anniversary.

I'm going to take this to mean that they're back together.

Which I'm happy about.

I'm happy about, but like the bad.

What about the concerns that she had raised just a few days ago?

Yeah, she said.

She said something.

Hold on.

Where's the quote?

She said, y'all know I'm honest and transparent, so I have to be the first to let you guys know.

Oh, sorry, that's the last one, that she was no longer engaged to Lamar.

No, she said something about like people expect you to do something.

You don't always have to do what like people expect you to do.

Something like that was what the gist that I got.

So no, I mean, I'm happy for them.

I really am, but like, it seemed like there were some like really legitimate concerns coming from her merely a week ago.

Yeah.

And I just want to know, like, were all the problems fixed?

This is what she said.

I know society pushes us to walk away from everyone and everything that hurts us, but the truth is, some things are worth staying for.

I agree.

I mean, Lamar is a PJOM.

He's honestly like the president of PJOM Nation.

Yeah.

And he deserves the best.

So like the fact that he's just like not sleeping alone makes me happy, you know?

Yes, I agree.

And I feel like that quote also applies to Chloe and Tristan, which we'll talk about in the Kardashians recap.

But you know, sometimes things are what they are.

And you just have to accept them.

Speaking of tumultuous relationships, a little update on Carl Lentz, the celebrity pastor's alleged lover is.

I don't know why I'm like obsessed with this story.

Claudia has asked us to talk about this story a number of times this week.

And finally, today I had Bruno.

I was overwhelmed.

I couldn't find a fifth story.

And I was like, I took advantage of her

vulnerability and she got me to report on the story well I just can't believe like the the mistress is very thirsty like she's speaking directly to page chicks like not even through like a lawyer like this is her moment and she's gonna shine yeah so she's talking to page six she says I was a drug to him she's talking about their five-month pandemic romance and the hypocrisy of a man who she said was unable to practice what he preached.

She said, I'm here to tell the truth.

And maybe by doing that, other people will have the courage courage to speak up too.

She said

that she was with her dog looking for somewhere to sit when Lentz offered her his circle at a park.

They got to talking.

They left the park together.

I was telling him everything, she said.

I thought he's single.

He's a good-looking man.

Why not?

They parted ways, but he took her phone number in the notes app on his iPhone.

This is like a level of detail that I actually did not need.

No, so that's what I'm saying.

She's just like really putting it all out there.

She said the notes thing that for her was a red flag, I guess, because it should have been in his phone.

She said the next day he asked her to save him a circle in the park.

Okay, so like blah, blah, blah.

The two of them got together.

What I thought was really interesting was that like the first time they hung out like in private in her apartment, she said he was like really nervous, like giving off like teenage virgin vibes, which is just like so mean.

It's just like really mean for her to say that.

But like, honestly, to me, what's so weird about this whole story is like Carl Lentz was a a part of this like institution where it's like they protect like they're very private and secretive.

And I just can't believe he would just like meet a stranger in the park and just like have sex with her.

Like, no, totally.

That's just so messy.

No, 100%.

That's not what I would have expected from him either.

So I just feel like there's no good way to have an affair.

But when you're a part of like a megachurch that is in the news a lot and like you're very protective and you're, you know, they're very closed off, I was just found it shocking that he would be so

lazy.

Yeah.

Like, find someone in the church.

Or someone who has.

Well, don't cheat on your wife, but if you're gonna, like, don't be dumb.

Yeah.

No, I feel that.

So that's why I wanted to talk about it.

Not because I'm obsessed with Carlinz or anything.

She is.

No, I'm 100% obsessed with him.

Yeah, no, the story is just really crazy.

I feel like every day it's like there's something new.

He had just sold his house, this and that.

Yeah, and also, I think maybe why I find it so interesting is because I'm fascinated with people who are famous for like, we have this conversation a lot for like their jobs.

Yes.

And like, it's just not every day that there's like famous pastors.

I mean, I guess actually like Joel Osteen is famous.

And like Tony Robbins.

Yeah.

Well, he's not a pastor, I don't think.

He's a motivational speaker, but maybe also like,

what's that guy's name?

Pastor Dan from Raising Helen.

He was a good pastor.

He was a good pastor.

Oh, you mean like from

Filthy Rich?

Yeah, right.

So I just think it's interesting like when people get famous for their jobs and Carl Luntz is one of those people and fame is a double-edged double-edged sword my friend yes one night you're hanging out with Justin Bieber the other you're meeting a lady in the park selling your house um was that our fifth and final story that was our fifth and final story so now we can do TV recap which I'm excited about because both great shows yes I think let's start with keeping up with the Kardashians it was on first

season finale bittersweet even though like it wasn't an amazing season it was just bittersweet because we know what's coming What's coming?

The final season.

Like, yes.

We're moving.

Now we can say like with the next season, the upcoming season of Kardashians is the final season, and that's just sad.

I know.

And this season was so short.

They always are short.

They're like micro seasons.

But this one, it was short, but it also had that break in the middle, remember?

So it's actually been like long.

I guess, but it's just so strange how the court.

Yeah, of course.

Hold on.

Sorry, everyone.

Just let him eat his harness.

It's not a good thing.

I know.

I guess I could just like, he breaks it all.

You have to choose your battles.

I know.

He's a habit.

What I thought was really interesting is that, like, during quarantine, like, they were actually quite busy like they were doing they were being super safe but like they were planning things like for courtney and then scott's birthday and they were together quite a bit but like none of that was shared on social media because like the covid police like in the last six months like those internet like policemen have become so like empowered and anything anyone does is like well your mask is not fully covering your nose like it's so crazy and so i just find it interesting that they had this whole life going on in calabasas and they literally live in a simulation like things go on there and like nobody knows about it it's crazy and i just find it interesting that they had all this stuff going on and like nobody knew about any of it.

Yeah.

No, definitely really interesting.

Also seeing how they all coped, like Kim and the four kids, and we had reported on it because she like shared in an interview how overwhelmed she was at the time.

And we were like, oh, how hard it must be.

Yeah.

But like, honestly, it looked extremely overwhelming.

And then she finally got rid of her kids and was like, I miss them so much.

I'm so bored.

Like, I just, I love her so much.

Me too.

She's clean.

Like, to North, get out.

Like, I feel like, you know, of all the kids, North is probably at the age where she's like, was the most annoying.

And I think she has so much energy.

She has so much personality.

Like, it must just be a lot.

Right.

And no, like, they have the privilege of probably having each kid as their own nanny.

In real, right?

So to go from that to nothing is a real shock to the system.

Yeah.

But my, um, this is actually last week when we didn't recap, but Kim was doing that foot peel mask that Scott gave her.

And me and Ben did it last week.

Our feet, like, our bed is disgusting.

I have to literally vacuum the bed every day because so much dead skin.

My feet are peeling.

It's like a banana, like my freshman.

Is that the thing where you put your foot in it?

And then it's like a little

glovey thing.

Yeah, it's like a foot glove.

Yeah.

And then I got one for Zach a while back.

It's amazing, but it's like, it's the upkeep.

It takes one to two weeks for all the.

And what's the goal?

You just like get fresh feet?

Well, I have like really dry heels and calluses on my big toe.

So just like for the and I get them pedicured and like exfoliated a bunch, but like for the first time in my life, like I'm literally shedding my dead skin.

And it's like, it's years of dead skin that's crazy i don't i don't have problems like that i don't think well it's just a fun experiment when i know but nothing else it looks really messy it's so messy like my dustbuster like my little handheld back has become my best friend like because it's just and i wear socks all around the house now to literally contain my dead skin that's insane it's disgusting that is so funny um

oh sorry back to the kardashian so

the the scott uh

rehab drama was actually very interesting to see to watch it unfold because we had like reported on it as it was happening.

But to see that, like, no one even knew that he was there.

He completely checked himself in.

He was just like trying to do what was best for himself.

That just like reminds me, I feel like in a couple of the celebrity memoirs that I've read, like celebrities will get to this breaking point and they try to seek out help and like they like what you would think would be best for them.

And it turns out to make a situation even worse.

And I'm just glad that he has the support system that he has because he could have gone to like a dark place after that happened and whatever he was feeling would have been even more exacerbated.

but i'm glad that he was able to like bounce back from the trauma that they inflicted on him seeing him on that family face time like right after it happened i thought he would be like a little bit like he for me if like if that had happened to me like i would be like destroyed i would be embarrassed i would feel you know exploited and i wouldn't want to talk to anyone and i feel like he had like kind of a good attitude about it like they were all joking how like he went there for trauma and they ended up like traumatizing him like i feel like he had like a good spirit about it and i loved seeing rob in the family chats Like I just, I love him so much and I'm so happy for him.

And I don't even want him back on the show, even though like I love seeing him on the show.

I really just want him to do like what's best for him and dream.

But I just loved seeing him and the way like he's honestly just like he's like, yeah, mom, you're totally right.

Like I just love him.

And I never see him.

Totally.

Really cute.

Other than that, the only other thing was like Tristan and Chloe.

And I know it's like so toxic, but when I'm watching it, I'm just rooting for them.

I'm rooting for them.

We've never seen this much of Tristan.

I don't know who he was a year ago that he's the new man now, but like the way he was when he was talking to Chris and like talking about how like she's in the penthouse and he's in the basement and he's gonna like work his way back up.

And even when it gets hard, he needs to look in the mirror and be like, you did this.

You're here because of your mistakes.

Yeah.

I'm just, I'm here for it.

I'm here for them.

I can see how it would be like challenging for Chloe to like fall back into love with him.

Of course.

I trust.

I really, I ship.

He's doing the work.

You know, a year's worth of like being a good man and

being there for her.

Like, that's, that's real stuff.

I know.

And part of me is like, I know it's toxic, but like, they have a kid together and they obviously love each other.

And I think Tristan loves being a part of their family.

So it's just like, oh, we need to talk about Kim's birthday vlog.

Oh, I fuck.

I didn't watch it yet.

Oh, my God, Jackie.

Okay.

I'm sorry.

So she put together an eight-minute IGTV.

And it wasn't really anything crazy.

It was just like footage from the weekend where basically like all they did was drink.

And Kim was actually drinking, which was crazy.

Could you like see what she was drinking?

She took a shot of tequila like on camera.

Okay.

And it was just like crazy because she really doesn't drink.

And pretty much like every night they like got drunk and stood on the beach and like all stood in a circle and like had a dance circle and Corey literally went wild and did a split and the whole crowd of people around him Trizzed him like they went nuts.

Like I don't think anyone knew that he could do the split.

Oh my god.

It was so funny and it was like a really like blurry like honestly like poorly done vlog but it was just like a real insight to what that weekend was like.

And it was like so fun and happy.

And I never, honestly, never saw Kim like dance.

Like she was just dancing with Simon and Phil.

She wasn't dance.

No, I know.

So it was like, it was really cute.

I actually really enjoyed it.

And I'm loving them exploring new formats.

Totally.

Oh my God, I have to watch it.

That sounds like such a treat.

I'm obsessed with Corey.

Me.

Like, firmly

obsessed.

Like, Neeb.

He's one of my favorite people on the show.

And I think that, honestly, like, I think him and Chris have like a

very healthy relationship.

I completely agree.

And I love his relationship with the girls, especially with Kylie.

Me too.

I'm just completely here for it.

And I'm going to treat myself to that.

The vlog was

so funny.

Like, when he did the split, it just like came out of nowhere.

And it was so funny.

And that trip just looked like, oh, my God.

I literally would have given my right arm up just to like fucking be a part of it.

But other than that, good season.

And I.

And I really liked how they did all the quarantine content.

I think the way that they filmed it.

And I can't believe that was on iPhones.

I know, like, multiple iPhones.

But then I was getting confused because we knew that there was one behind them showing their conversation and one in front of them.

They showed us how they set it up.

But then the one in front of them, when they would show us like that angle, we never, the camera behind them wasn't there.

So it was like, I saw the camera behind there many times.

But many times I didn't.

Like when that was just like angles.

No, but like, I guess.

Yeah, maybe, maybe.

Maybe they didn't.

Okay, fine.

I really hope that they, like, every single one of them like gives it their all for the final season.

Like, I want Rob, Kendall, Kylie.

Like, I want everyone giving their all, like, making this an amazing season, because I'm really sad like that it's coming to an end.

I know, but I just am holding out hope that the new, whatever's next, that there's more show, just a different provider and format, etc.

Also, I think the most interesting thing about watching them in quarantine was seeing all of their natural hair.

Yeah.

Kim's is really short.

Chloe's is short and blonde.

And Courtney's is short too.

Yeah, I just thought that was really interesting because they're always like wearing wigs and extensions.

Chloe had like amazing nails the whole time.

Yeah.

Like the claws.

Yeah.

So I wonder how she did that.

I don't know.

And then Southern Charm, which was good.

I mean, I'm just so in love with John Pringle and I just like really am rooting for him in Madison.

You're in love with him?

I think only as it pertains to Madison.

Like he's definitely acting inappropriately because like she's fully in a relationship.

But like, you know, I think I've come to the conclusion that like maybe her and Austin just like are not OTP.

Oh, I think that they are OTP, but I think

I don't mind what John Pringle is doing because I think it will make Austin step up more and be more of what Madison deserves.

But like, I really do think that Madison and Austin are OTP.

Like, they just can't quit each other.

I

really love Catherine for two reasons.

One, she's the only person who points out how bizarre it is that like Patricia is like having such a heavy hand in everything, like making comments to Madison about her relationship with Austin when it's like Catherine's the only one who's literally saying like, this is like an 80-year-old woman.

Like, why is she getting involved in your relationship?

No, she was like, it's like we're on the instant cover and she's the one holding the puppets at the top.

And it's like, that's exactly what she's doing.

And even though Catherine and Patricia are in a good place, so you would think like Catherine wouldn't want to cross Patricia or like say something.

Like that.

No, but like she's not crossing her.

She's just saying the obvious.

And the other thing I really loved about Catherine, which happened last week, was when Leva like just really confronted her, like.

hands down, like you cannot say this shit about Cameron.

Like she was very unapologetic.

And I really agreed with Catherine and the way that she handled that whole situation.

It's like, why is everyone allowed to say anything they want about me and Madison?

Like we're just like the ex like the

what's the word?

Exception?

Yeah, sure, that works.

Like, they're just the exceptions.

But if anyone says anything about anyone else, like, it's like, how could you say that?

Like, and I just, I, and you know what?

Even though everyone loves her and I liked her too, like, Cameron was, for like the last eight years, like really the pot stirr, like, and just like the mover of pieces.

And also, she was so influential in the group that if she had been more sympathetic towards Catherine, everyone else would have been.

But, like,

and so you don't get eight years on a show.

She literally had eight years on a show and never never once

never met her husband like so surface level whereas like Catherine's literally bleeding out with her custody cases and Thomas getting a girl pregnant like so much and it's just like if I were Catherine I would be pissed too and I would just say whatever the fuck I wanted and it's worth noting that Catherine did not make that rumor up because I heard it too like a year ago.

Yeah, no, but I guess Leva was just upset with her for repeating it.

Which I hear you being a good friend, Leva, but it's like, do you know what's gone on here for the last seven years?

Yeah, for sure.

But she's just like seeing it from her perspective.

I absolutely love Leba.

Me too.

Like with every passing episode, last week I watched and that was like my note for the week.

Like I love her.

I love her.

Business family.

She's so impressive.

So impressive, so interesting.

Her son's name is Lil, which I think is the cutest thing ever.

She was calling him Little and like, that's like Lil, Lil.

And then his name popped up on the screen.

I'm like, I love that name.

Me too.

Do you have a piece of tape on your shirt?

What do you mean?

This?

Yeah.

Is that design or?

Oh, I thought it was part of the shirt.

Because it's like, no, it's vetimins.

So I'm like, they just do weird stuff.

Oh, leave it.

Actually, it might be.

It might be if it's vetamins.

Leave it.

It's definitely not.

Are you sure?

Okay.

It's definitely not.

Yes, by the way, I totally agree with Leva.

I'm with you about Leva.

Like, I loved her.

I thought her businesses were so impressive.

Like, and how they all talked about Republic, how it, like, literally changed the social scene in Charleston.

Like, they don't even remember life before Republic.

I just thought that was like so impressive that her and her husband did that.

And I just like love people who go on

reality shows and are so proud of their culture.

And I think that's why like I love Shaws of Sunset so much because you learn so much.

And it's just like cool to see people who are so proud of where they came from.

And I loved it like in Charleston, where I'm sure there's like no Persian people.

She was just like so proud of her cooking and her mom.

And it was just, I love people who do that.

So I actually, this episode really made me like Leva when I was like a little turned off to her when she was just like so aggressive to Catherine last week.

But I actually like, and then I liked her conference.

Even though I.

Probably agree with I hear, I see where Catherine's coming from.

I really liked Leva's confrontation style.

Like, she just was said it like it was, like, no holds barred.

And I think that even though Catherine like felt the way that she did, she was like, okay, like, oh, you know, she stood up for so much.

She was like, I'm not going to keep going down this road.

Yeah.

You know?

Also, I just like need New York to open up one of those bars where your dogs can run around.

Like, oh my God.

What the hell was that?

I need that.

I had so much anxiety when Danny's dog was in the mud because like it's a white flat dog.

Like, but they were having so much fun.

It really bothers me that Shep's dog's name is Craig.

I know.

It's so rude.

It just like harks back to when Shep was the biggest fucking asshole ever and like to name your dog after your best friend is like so nasty.

No, I agree and it's like part of me like really does try so hard to see the best in Shep.

Like he didn't know Peter and Madison fucked.

Like part of me like really really, but part of me like just can't because he's like the worst, you know?

I know, I know.

I feel like.

He's making strides.

He's making strides.

And I really liked his conversation with Madison.

By the way, like Madison, I don't know why everyone keeps starting with Madison because it's like she's the last person I would want to confront

so on point.

Like

she just she will roast you.

Don't start with her.

I agree.

Because she will finish it.

Yeah.

And she'll finish you.

She'll finish it.

After years of Shep just like going after everyone on the show and everyone sort of just like cowering and

scurrying away like she's like nah.

Fuck you and define your relationship.

Yeah, no, I love her.

I love her.

I think she's a wonderful reality television story and a great woman.

So yeah, I think that was it.

Oh, I did watch the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City on Watch Rapids Live.

I caught up on Watch Rappin' Live yesterday.

First saw the episode with Darius Rucker and Reba was absolutely incredible.

Like, I recommend everyone watch it.

It was just like a great night to be a Bravo fan and a pop culture fan.

And Andy did this segment.

Is how fancy is Reba?

And it was like, because she's like so rich.

Like, when was the last time you flew commercial?

Like, all these questions.

It was great.

When was it?

Last year.

And even Darius Rucker was like, wow, really?

Then the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City were on.

It was so messy.

like everyone and their tech problems.

Like Mary's camera was like literally on the floor and Lisa was so blurry.

Like, but I, it was interesting to see them in that setting.

I agreed.

Jensha is my queen.

Heather is my queen.

And I'm, it's unfortunately just going to be like a big fat no for me from Lisa.

Is that her name?

I get Lisa and Meredith confused.

I'm sorry.

Explain why.

She was giving, you were right.

She was giving off like very

premeditated like I've been waiting my whole life for this moment.

Yes, and like even just her look and everything and like Andy, and like, she just tries, like, she's like, like, putting herself in the housewife's hemisphere.

Like, even though she's literally been here for two years.

Like, she has one photo from a break party with Bethany.

And she was like, I met her.

I'm so happy for her and her empire.

You know, it's like, you literally met at a party once seven years ago and you're proud of her.

Like, it was just very thirsty.

So I totally saw what you saw, but you definitely planted it in my head.

Oh, for sure, which I can do.

And did you like Meredith more on Watch What Apples Live?

Yes.

Oh, my God.

So Meredith got something done, like lip filler or something that made her look way different than Lisa.

She was giving me like Kyle Richards vibes.

Which was very helpful.

I need her to continue filling up her face.

And yes, she wasn't so thirsty.

It was like Andy would ask a question, and there were certain people like Jen

Heather who like literally could not wait to answer the question.

And Lisa was just like, Meredith was just like, I will speak when spoken to.

Like, she was very relaxed and not thirsty.

And Whitney, too, and Mary, because I don't think Mary had any idea what was going on.

Like, she was just not present.

She couldn't figure out, like, she couldn't hear anything.

Like, she was not there.

But some of them were really thirsty and some of them were not like and i just thought that was interesting i thought it was interesting the question that andy asked about like how does the town the city of salt lake city and you know the mormon community feel about the show and lisa was like they love it like everyone's so happy that house guys are here she's talking about herself so family and then heather was like i couldn't disagree with you more and heather is like really connected to like the core like legit parts of the church and like she would know yeah and also i just feel like lisa is just saying how she feels like we love it we're so happy

um so it was a really busy week of television watching.

I'm honestly relieved that it's over.

I know.

I guess next week without CMAs, like we get three hours back.

And no Kardashians because it...

Kardashians.

No Kardashians because this was the season finale.

So four hours back next week.

Yeah.

No premieres, though.

Oh, please.

Well, you know, Total Bell has started again, but I didn't watch.

I didn't watch.

But sometimes I do.

I don't know.

I really like that show.

And like, sometimes I catch one episode and then I like fly through the season.

Well, I'm actually thinking maybe I'm not going going to watch TV this weekend because that's literally all I did.

Crown dropped

in two days.

November 15th.

That is very exciting.

Wow.

That just, oh, look, Bruno sweets, the crown is dropping.

The crown.

Crown tea.

Hey, my boy.

Hi, my sweetie pie.

So we're going to wrap this up.

Thank you, Bruno, for being here.

Everyone, follow Bruno on Instagram at PupsWithNojob.

And thank you guys so much for listening to The Morning Toast, The Millennium Morning Show, where we deliver the fast five stories every Monday through Friday that you need to know.

Wait, no, I fucked that up.

Thank you so much for listening to the Morning Toast, the Millennium Morning Show, where we deliver the fast five stories that you need to know every morning, Monday through Friday, on YouTube.

So, if you're watching this on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up.

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So, wherever you listen to podcasts, find out some Morning Toast and leave a five-star review about how beautiful, stunning, and smart we are.

We hope you have an amazing weekend.

Stay safe.

Don't drink and drive.

Have a good time.

Wear a face mask.

And we'll see you tomorrow.

I mean,

Monday.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Bruno Sweet.

Bruno.