Triforce! Mailbag Special #51: The Forbidden Dunkers

Pickox.

I'm Scott Hanson, host of NFL Red Zone.

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Martha listens to her favorite band all the time.

In the car,

gym,

even sleeping.

So when they finally went on tour, Martha bundled her flight and hotel on Expedia to see them live.

She saved so much, she got a seat close enough to actually see and hear them.

Sort of.

You were made to scream from the front row.

We were made to quietly save you more.

Expedia, made to travel.

Savings vary and subject to availability, flight inclusive packages are at all protected.

Hello, friends.

Welcome back.

It's another mailbag episode with your boy Peefbox,

your main man.

This is your boy.

And your fella

Lulu Brindley.

Let's start off with a jingle.

I didn't write this one.

This was was sent to me.

Okay.

I'm just going to get the name of the person who sent it really quickly.

Have you guys heard the

50-cent Indiclub country remix?

Conway 50?

Yes.

Conway 20, but Conway 50.

That was good.

All right.

So this is from Devon.

This one is from Devon.

You guys ready to play?

Yeah.

All right.

It's 3, 2, 1.

Play.

It's the Tri-Force Mailman.

I've got a tiny dick.

Which emails will they pick?

Oh, I know.

I love that rhyme.

Oh, that's it.

Do you know what?

That's the length I want.

Perfect jingle.

Well done, Seven.

It's perfect.

Do you know what?

It kind of sounds like the theme song for a 1960s Saturday morning cartoon.

It reminded me a little bit of Bagpus.

Yeah.

Especially the bit at the end there.

Very, very Bagpuss.

Very, very innocent age.

Yeah.

All right.

Let's let's.

This is a callback to an episode, Little Mailbag, where someone sent in evidence that Plopzaland of Belgium was using Diggy Diggy Hole.

That's right.

So this is from someone.

I'm going to replace that.

They've asked me to replace their name with Octav de Ball because two other Belgians will think that's funny.

So they're the other two Belgians that listen to this podcast.

Oktaf de Bol.

I don't know what that means.

It's the name of a character.

Sure.

Those guys are pissing their pants laughing right now.

Can you imagine?

Yeah.

Sorry for the profanity, but I'm from Belgium, so I know a fair bit about Plopsaland.

I feel like there is some crucial information Lewis is missing that, if he would hear it, would change his opinion on suing Plopsaland.

Basically, the owner is a massive dick.

He does not just own Plopsaland, but an entire children's

entertainment company called Studio 100.

A lot of Belgians would like to see people stand up to this guy.

His name?

Gert Verhulst.

Why do I and many others not like him?

Let's make a short list.

Desperately wants to be taken seriously since his career started with a dog puppet.

And there is indeed a picture of him holding a dog puppet.

Now he has a cramp-inducing talk show, which in the first week of being on air, he had an entire episode dedicated to finally

figuring out if the N-word is racist.

And

in his conclusion, it isn't.

And he'd used it multiple times.

Also, he had another episode where he had the least critical interview ever with another old white Belgian celebrity who'd had allegations of stalking and crossing sexual boundaries and was eventually convicted of that.

He's a Nepo baby son who is an idiot and presents the Flemish version of Love Island.

He has a cringe reality TV show.

He has a column in a newspaper where he's just basically doing Piers Morgan-style attention baiting, and he's had sex with a bunch of much younger women that work for him and general bad vibes.

So, Gert Verholst, if you wanted to sue Lulu, that's the guy you'd be going up against.

Sure.

I find it quite it's quite interesting how small countries like Belgium or Malta

have a limited pool of celebrities, right?

And so this guy clearly is not only a children's entertainer with a puppet, but then became the talk show host, but he's also related.

Did they say related to the person who hosted it?

No, so his Nepo baby son.

He is sort of foisting his son on the public.

Do you see what I mean?

I mean, that happens all over the world, right?

But at the same time,

it's look,

it kind of goes with the territory, right?

If you're a politician and you haven't, you know, got like

some sort of love child

somewhere, you know, well, are you a real politician?

Yeah, exactly.

Are you really politician?

If you're a billionaire and you're not a bit of a scumbag, are you a real billionaire?

So, yeah, I don't know.

I don't think it's going to change my mind.

And also, I don't think we even own Diggy Diggy Hole anymore.

I think Windrows do.

So they'll have to send the email to them.

There you go.

We lost it.

We didn't protect it, so we lost it.

You lost Diggy Diggy Hole.

You had one job.

It's fine.

All you had to do

was protect Diggy Diggy Hole, and you couldn't even do that.

No, it's not my job.

Simon's Diggy Diggy Hole, man.

Simon's job.

Here's one from Zoe.

Imagine being a little Timmy on his birthday, excitedly unwrapping his present, hoping for action, man, but instead getting this.

I'll show you guys this picture and I'll describe it to the audience here.

It is an Erwin Rommel action figure.

Ah,

Erwin Rommel.

I was reading a little bit about Erwin Rommel.

Apparently, he killed himself with cyanide because he was involved in

a plot to overthrow Hitler.

They found out about it.

Yeah, you're right.

And so he killed himself.

But then they said that he was, you know, to maintain cohesion in the the Nazi party or whatever, because he was such a decorated general.

They said

that he died in battle or was injured

in battle or something.

He was one of these generals who was actually, he wrote a book during the First World War, and that's why he was not from the officer class.

He was promoted from kind of he wasn't from like the nobility, right?

Like all the other officers were.

And as a result, he was actually kind of capable.

He ran like basically what they call the cleanest war that Germany ran, which was the North Africa campaign.

And it was a very, yeah, there were lots of awful things that happened, but like in terms of like,

it was almost like a clean fight, inverted commas.

And I think he gained a lot of respect for that in the world generally

and also

in Germany generally.

And I think when they found out about the

because what happened towards the end of the war in 1944 was that the Russians were closing in, Italy had sort of given up, Normandy landings had happened.

It was kind kind of the writing was on the wall.

And he and a bunch of other prominent Germans decided to kill Hitler, but they fucked it up and got captured.

And they all got killed.

Tons of them did.

And Rommel just,

he was doing the defense of France at the time.

And they just...

Well, that's what they said he was doing.

They said he was killed in his infantry car by

allied forces.

So yeah, I can see what, but then again, still a Nazi.

So

of all the Nazis, probably one of the least bad Nazis

is still a Nazi, a pretty serious Nazi.

I just want to say I wasn't implying that you should feel sorry for him or whatever.

On a scale of one just so folk to share with you, I'd say he was like, if Hitler was a 10 on the evil scale, he was like an 8.5.

He was up there.

I mean, he was a killer.

He was killing people.

Lots of people.

He was definitely a Nazi.

He was also a very effective Nazi, which is perhaps even worse.

Yeah.

I mean, those ineffectual Nazis who didn't do much, at least they weren't contributing.

This guy was very, very dangerous.

So

I'm going to say Erwin Rommel actually.

He tried to kill Hitler.

Although it was quite hit.

Let me actually just say for the mailbox.

And he failed.

Let's have a big up for Erwin Rommel killing himself.

Yeah,

I support that big up.

That's a good big up.

This week, let it be known for the rest of history that we bigged up the fact that Erwin Rommel killed himself at some god and maybe probably did humanity a favor in the process as well.

Sorry if you're a Rommel fan, it's a fact.

He was a living, breathing.

I like the action figure, though.

Like, I feel like it's again really borderline

allowed, isn't it?

You know, is there an Adolf Hitler action figure like next to it?

That should probably not be allowed.

I bet you there.

I bet you there are.

Who's?

I mean, forbidden action figures.

This is some

you know, the kidult phenomenon that's been happening for a while and carrying on now my local toy store

That we you know my kids go to there's not many over here obviously small place but they have a they have like a like the toy store and then they have what they call the kidult store which is all the big collector Lego sets models

cards Funko pops all that all the kind of like you know the the merch around anime and and all that kind of stuff and i was talking to the guy who owns it because, um, you know, it's because you're a dad in your shorts.

I'm a dad, and it's a small place, and you, you know, you recognize people all the time.

You stop and chat to them.

Yeah, he's the guy who used to have a hand puppet with a dog and now runs a theme park.

Yeah, it's the same thing.

And I was saying to him, I was like, oh, you know,

how are things going, you know, with this, with this other store?

Like, do you, do you not feel like it should just be one store?

And he's like, no, actually, it's really good with the separation.

And this store does better than the other one.

I was like, yeah, I'm not surprised, actually.

Like, some of these Lego sets are like 500 pounds.

Grown-ups have money.

Yeah, that's it.

So he said, so it was interesting.

The kid alt phenomenon.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm just, I mean, I don't, I mean, Lego, obviously, yes, the Lego sets have got like 18 plus on them, but there's nothing, you know.

X rated about that.

It's just that they're a little bit harder to put together and also not really like intended for a four-year-old.

And I don't know, like the idea of Lego putting 18 plus on their Lego sets for not really any reason.

I think a competent 12-year-old could assemble any of these

Lego.

Even like a competent nine-year-old, I reckon, could assemble any 18-plus Lego set, really.

I don't know quite, but I think the idea is that it is meant for

serious grown-ups.

Yeah, they should do like some, they should do some James Bond Legos with like all the all the all the babes in James Bond, you know.

I just think they should just do some porno Lego.

Get some porn stars, get their names attached.

Well, put it on a high shelf.

Do like Lego Technic and make the figurines quite big, you know?

So, for example, though, the thing that just came out this month was the Lego Twilight house.

So the house that it's, you know, you know, Twilight, the movie.

Is that the one with Robert Pattinson in?

Yes, from, from, from 20 years ago, I think.

Twilight, the movie.

What, the business?

It was a huge thing.

Correspondent from 2008 came out early 2000 for the BBC News?

Do you remember Stephanie Meyer, who wrote all these books about that?

It was originally like fanfic, and it got super popular.

And every woman you know, I knew in 2008 was into Twilight.

And it was, it was a massive global phenomenon.

And obviously now,

an entry-level drug to 50 Shades of Grey, essentially.

Is it?

I'm just saying.

When you're a child, you're a little bit more.

Wasn't Twilight about vampires?

Yeah, but they're all

full each other.

They're all fucking each other.

They fuck each other.

And it was teenage girls, really, but those teenage girls are now in their 30s, right?

And those,

that is who that Lego set is aiming at, right?

It's aiming at those

people buying that Twilight.

It's such a strange thing.

It's such a niche audience, right?

Yeah.

But they know that it will sell.

It's not, you know, a nine-year-old can say, mommy, that's a cool house.

I like vampires and sex.

Can I buy that Twilight house?

Good God.

You know, they can buy it, right?

It's in the kids' shop.

It's not like it's it's actually like anything horrible but they wouldn't want it they've got no interest in twilight but exactly it's it's it is it is aimed for their mum right and so maybe their mum builds the twilight set while they're building the mario set or whatever like um i don't know if i've ever known a woman uh to be interested in lego or build lego i i there are loads right okay right in perion.flax at gmail.com you don't need the dot just fyi i've had people send me the same email twice and saying sorry i got the email wrong if google doesn't care about the dot.

You can put p.y.r.

It'll still get here.

It doesn't matter.

I'm just saying.

Okay.

It doesn't matter.

Okay, cool.

So, yeah, what I'm saying is that the Erwin Rommel thing is not something that would be appropriate in a kids' store at all.

And so it's just a kid's product.

Is this a joke product or is this a real product?

It looks like from the picture you've said, it looks real.

This is in a shop where they're selling collectible toys.

And that's

literally like an action figure store.

And there you can get your Erwin Rommel toy I mean let's just think

that's that is that isn't weird it's weird you know yeah there it is I'd be interested to see the whole series of toys that came out around this because you'd expect that there probably to be a Hitler in there but then probably like a Churchill and well this is it like imagine a bunch of other like big there should be like a like a Stalin in there for example well exactly like

yeah do you know what like maybe they can maybe if imagine the death of stalin or whatever that movie was a big hit and they did like lego for the death of stalin they'd have to have a little stalin minifig right yeah they'd have to have a like or a or a merch that was a star if they were tying in to these movies that have hitler or hitler like characters i mean you know we we have got people that

lego collector's edition I mean, look at, look at, what's his name?

Not Voldemort,

the other one, Grindelwald or whatever.

He was like Wizard Hitler, right?

You know, there's plenty of action figures of him out, I'm sure.

I don't know who that is.

Who?

Grindelwald.

It was Johnny Depp, but then he got in trouble and then they replaced him with

the action figure.

The great weird.

Perfect tiger toys.

Tiger Toys.

One sixth Soviet leader Stalin action figure.

That is a you can purchase that.

It comes with a with a variety of hands, some holding a pipe,

others not, and different hats.

So you can

see

any more, like more recent ones.

Like, do they have like a Tony Blair or like

a George W?

Um

I'm just looking for Hitler action figure.

I'm sure there's tons of Hitler action figures.

So I can't, there isn't a Hitler one on eBay that I could find.

Right.

Right, okay.

That's weird.

Let's just Google Hitler action figures.

It's nice to know that some things are still sacred, in a sense.

Like, even

they've got the bad taste to put Stalin in.

But there it is.

350 quid for a Hitler action figure.

Where is the like?

Where is

there's gotta be Bill Cosby action figures picking around?

Jimmy Savile.

There's gotta be some Jimmy Savile ones.

Where is the line on this, right?

Like, because I get sometimes, I had an email the other day for a historical game.

And they said, oh, we'd love you to promote this while dressed up as a historical figure, for example, as Lenin.

And I was like, I'm not,

I'm not dressing up as Lennon.

I mean, Lennon was an awful person, right?

Like,

am I, or is he, is he suddenly, is he okay to role players?

You know, if Prince Harry role-played as Lennon, would that be all right?

I've posted a Playmobile figure.

This is actually Doc Brown from Back to the Future, but it does unfortunately look an awful lot like Jimmy Salmon.

It does look just like him, yeah.

I see.

Yeah.

You found a Funko pop that looks like Jimmy Salmon.

That is not a Funko pop.

That's a Funko Playmobile.

Yeah, that's what I see.

It's almost more.

Okay, so Funko Playmobile, I think, is not doing too great, right?

It had a couple of flop movies and I think Playmobile movies?

Yeah, Playmobile.

Playmobile movies, yeah.

I think they tried to...

Oh, my God.

I didn't even know that.

I think they tried to get in

on the Lego.

Well, look, this shit is just not as good as Lego.

I mean, it's been around since I was a kid.

Playmobile.

You go to a kid's house, and they seem to to be either a Lego house or a Playmobile house.

And the Playmobile houses, those kids had no friends.

You didn't need friends when you had all these cool Playmobile sets, though.

The Playmobile is like, we have Lego at home.

And then it says Playmobile.

All right, so let's move on because we've got to do another email.

This is an incident at an airport that happened to a fella in November.

I treated my partner to Christmas shopping,

a Christmas shopping trip to New York.

It was something she always wanted to do.

So I saw this as the best way to ask her to marry me, but life has other plans.

All was going well.

The flight was great, but on arrival to JFK, it went downhill.

After queuing for passport control, the officer scanned my passport and I was asked for my fingerprint to be scanned, so I obliged.

After scanning, he looked up at me with the fear of God in his eyes.

And before I could say anything, I was instantly surrounded by multiple officers with weapons drawn screaming at me to get on the ground.

Then I was cuffed and dragged off, also detaining my partner in the process.

Jesus.

I was taken into a room that looked like a scene from a 1970s detective porn film.

It was here I found out that I was a wanted terrorist named Imin Yashed.

At this point, I started laughing.

I'm in Yashed.

At this point, I started laughing as I instantly understood what happened.

In 2010, I was serving in the armed forces and I was doing a tour in Afghanistan.

My job was to work with the Afghan National Police to mentor and assist the detainment of known Taliban fighters.

Once the ANP detained the individual, it was our job to process them, which was taking pictures and fingerprints.

Now, after a couple of weeks of doing this, we got quite bored.

so we started taking pictures of each other using the nato supplied camera this camera had a built-in fingerprint scanner also so we just basically processed each other fake names and all and i'm in your shed was born anyway so it turns out the camera we were supplied automatically uploaded data to an international database eight hours of detention later no i was able to leave and see my partner whose face was a mess with her makeup running crying at the thought she'd been shacked up with a potential terrorist anyway i suppose um uh i i proposed and she said yes, so it turned out fine in the end.

She has since left me for another man, that bitch.

Oh, no.

Well, life happens, I guess.

I know that doesn't help much.

You had been confirmed not to be a terrorist.

He might still be a terrorist.

You know, that's you can't.

What a mistake she's made.

You don't get this opportunity to get a check that hard, you know, on whether your spouse is a terrorist.

You know, just

saying, know what you got, woman.

What a mistake.

um woman that i mean i don't know if i i don't know if i believe that story but it is it is it's a good one

it's fun it's a real fun one i mean if it's an urban myth sorry it could be

but it gave us a laugh and hopefully gave you a chuckle too yes um this is a this is another one that could also be fake we'll find out um in some countries there is a law where if a passenger dies on your coach this is as a coach driver the driver is put into jail until it's proven that the driver wasn't the cause of death.

Dumb, I know.

I once did a tour around Europe with old people.

I had a passenger come up to me and say, drive.

We got another one.

I didn't know what they were saying.

After asking, they told me that someone had died on the coach.

So one of the old people has died on the coach.

Knowing the law and that I was in France, I panicked, thinking, oh shit, I'm going to jail.

One of the passengers said, why don't you put your sunglasses on the dead passenger and we could declare him dead once we crossed the border?

So we did.

Sunglasses on and shit in my pants we managed to cross the border to spain where we could declare his death and i would avoid jail what the

do we think that's real i don't know if that's real i'm at least a 50-50 on that i i i don't think a tri-force listener is driving a bus of old people through france i think that's exactly who our audience is people with a very dull job just having to drive old people around they've got to listen it's like a front job for like serial killing though like that's what all of our listeners do They do these, like, you know, these

jobs that don't sort of

show, you know, show who they really are.

Behind the scenes, they're just, you know, they've got closets full of dead prostitutes and stuff.

But, you know, by day, they're just driving around old French people on a bus.

Nobody would ever know.

I can't find anything by Googling Snopes and stuff about old person dies on bus story.

So

I'm going to edge over to real.

What great story.

Love it.

It's a great story.

I still.

Great story.

It's almost too great, you know.

Like, too great.

Yeah.

I think it's

smells skishy.

So, here's another email.

This is about the Djarvik Diamond Mine, which I spoke about a little bit.

Yeah, we talked about multiple times.

Yeah, it's the one you flew over and you were looking at.

And it fascinated me, yeah.

Just listened to the latest Triforce, and I was stoked to hear you all talking about the Djarvik Diamond Mine.

I work for a company that helps with the decommissioning and resale of the equipment up there.

So hearing your excitement was awesome because honestly, I geek out over this stuff too.

It's like playing with giant Tonka trucks, every kid's dream.

Since you all touched on the sustainability side of the mine closure, I wanted to share a bit more.

Dijarvik has been all over it, making sure as much gear as possible gets redeployed.

We're talking excavators, processing equipment, water treatment systems, electrical infrastructure.

The scale of it is wild.

And then there's logistics.

Getting the gear out of the north is a whole operation.

Because of the weather, we can only transport everything in the winter while the lake around the mine is frozen.

I figured you might get a kick at some of the gear we're moving.

So there are some pictures of

the gear that they're moving.

I'm going to post a link here.

This is, oh, no, I can't do that.

Hold on.

I hope these are all like suitably scaled, like, you know, taken that from angles that make them look even more gigantic.

Here is the this is on the lenmark.com.

And this is all the equipment that you can buy that was used at Diarvic.

For example, there's this huge excavator.

It could be yours, so $64,000.

Or it's like an even bigger excavator.

You can buy an underground substation with an 800 kVA transformer for 190 grand Canadian.

That is fucking hell.

That's mad.

Wow.

So that's that's the kind of stuff they're selling.

Um, so these are such great picks as well.

Look at that.

They've got it's like an un okay, here it is: a shovel bucket, a five-part shovel buck, just a shovel bucket for an excavator, $200,000.

Okay, the excavator itself you can get for $400,000.

You can get a 1086 HP excavator 1900-6 for 400,000 bucks.

Holy crap!

I mean, look at this.

I've posted a link.

This is a hundred size of this thing.

This is 185 kilowatt copper regrind mill stirred media detritor.

That's what that is.

Flip.

Look at this underground MCC.

Can you just say that?

Can you just say that again?

185 kilowatt copper regrind mill stirred media detritor.

Oh,

media detritor.

I just love hearing that.

No way.

Oh, my goodness.

I don't think I've ever even built one of them in a video game.

That's that.

I'm going to have to.

I need a

stirred media detritor.

That is fucking cool.

This is exactly right about the Tonka trucks, the

giant piece of kit.

I saw a thing about some of these mines in the north of Australia.

And it's all pretty much done remotely.

They have all of these trucks being driven from a control room in Sydney or somewhere, you know, thousands of miles away.

And they just,

you know, you look at the place and it's just like a remote control little,

except they're not little, they're gigantic.

These trucks shoveling iron ore.

And it's all automatic.

So they shovel iron ore onto this train and the train goes to the, you know, all the way down the coast.

And it's very few people need to actually man this system.

And it transports something like a thousand tons a day or something

or maybe even more.

It's mental.

All of this stuff, like when you see like just that picture of the stirred media detritor, just looking at that, it looks so insanely complicated.

All the gang planks and walkways and pipes and machinery and electricity.

The fact that this stuff is something we're able to build and use is just mind-boggling.

The logistics behind all of this stuff.

This is crazy.

It just blows my mind.

This is from Louie.

Anyway, moving on.

I've submitted a couple of emails for the mailbag in the past,

either responding to a topic you guys brought up or just telling you about something I find interesting.

All right, thanks.

I was wondering if you've noticed any trends amongst the people who submit things.

Do you tend to read out almost every email sent in?

Or are you having to cut down from a large amount?

I noticed in the most recent mailbag at the time of sending, you said how you had 15 great emails in a row.

Is that a rare occurrence that you'll just easily read banger after banger?

Or is it the case you don't get that many emails, but all of them are great, so you tend to read them all out?

Also, do you tend to get repeat offenders or are people more one and done with their submissions?

So, generally, what is the state of the Triforce mailbag?

So, I obviously use my sort of public email account for this, which is the pyramidflax at gmail.com, which is on my, what was you know, on my Twitter, it's readily, readily findable.

Um, so since the last mailbag, um, we've had uh 50, 100,

what's the February 14th today?

So, a hundred

we've had 150 emails since the last email mailbag went out.

That's heavy.

That's a lot of emails.

Yeah, it's a lot.

So I do read them all.

But the thing is, we generally, I try to have 20 emails for each mailbag that I think are actually like the best ones.

And we generally don't get through even more than...

10 really of those because we'll talk a bit and sometimes one email will get us chatting and stuff

which is the whole point of it really.

Yeah.

I mean, we don't just want to sit here and read our emails.

But so it is very, very hard.

I will say the one thing I still get is people sending pictures from where they listen to Triforce.

And I think that was the very first mailbag.

Yeah, we used to get those like on social media and stuff.

On socials, yeah.

But some people are obviously either just started the podcast or they're just catching up.

It's kind of a tricky one.

Yeah, I don't, I like getting those still, though.

I like seeing those.

Yeah, it's nice.

I like those.

All right.

So yeah, I would just say in general, I get way more emails than we could ever fit in an episode.

If there is one that is really good that didn't make it in the mailbag that I was going to read it out, I've got a separate sort of, what do you call it, a label or whatever, where I put those and I'll sell, use these later sort of thing.

So that if it's a bad week and I haven't really got any great emails, I'll go and pull some of those.

those good ones out.

It's a few hours work in the morning, but I love it.

I love reading it.

Sometimes I know it's a good one, so I don't read it all because I don't want to spoil it for myself on the episode.

So there you go.

If you wanted that little insight, a little behind the scenes for you.

Yeah.

I've found in modern life that it's very, very loud.

Lots of things are talking to me.

The bus is telling me what stop I'm pulling up at next.

The train is telling me to mine the gap and watch for the doors.

It's yap, yap, yap.

Everything that's reversing has to beep loudly.

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There we go, on with the show.

All right, so

here is,

this is interesting.

Do you guys remember I mentioned a guy called Wes Watson?

No.

So he was a convict who had, or ex-con who had a YouTube channel, and he was enormous.

The dude was huge, like ridiculously jacked.

Okay.

Vines popping out of his arms and his.

This is coming back to me a little bit now.

Yeah.

And he would do, he would do, for some reason, all his videos, he's facing to the side and the camera's on his right.

So you can see the size of his arm.

And he's like, what's it like in prison?

I'll tell you what it is.

It sucks in prison.

You've got to be hard as fuck.

You know, he's like screaming.

And when he's yelling, he's turning red and the veins are bulging out.

He's been arrested.

Oh.

And he's in big trouble.

And apparently at his bail hearing, they said they couldn't find any priors.

So people aren't sure if he ever actually did time or not.

And there is a Wes Watson subreddit

that I've been doing.

So he might be lying about all of his time and experience.

We don't know.

We don't know.

In the big time.

It possibly is.

But he actually might now be going to prison.

Yes, but he said he was a shop caller on the yard and that, you know, he was this big deal and everything.

And so the Wes Watson subreddit, I saw a really funny post on the other day.

He's just going to sit in his cell and cry every day.

I don't know.

I mean, it said, I thought this was like a fan subreddit for Wes Watson, but these people hate Wes Watson.

Oh, right.

And this subreddit is purely them tearing him down and pointing out all the terrible things he does.

I love that.

And what a bad guy he is.

So I think he's in trouble for beating someone up in his gym.

Right.

Yeah, he's he's he's in big trouble, really.

I mean, I know that he says he's six foot, but his arrest sheet had had him lifted as five foot eight.

And now he's gone up, he's doing all these videos saying they just eyeball you at the intake.

Everybody knows that they don't fucking measure you.

He's got big platform shoes on.

I mean, they make you stand against that thing that has the height thing.

Yeah.

So I'm pretty sure they do measure you.

Anyway, I just thought it was funny.

If you, if you want to dive into the world of Wes Watson, people get so weird about the weirdest things, eh?

Like, there's nothing you can do about your height.

Like, just accept it.

There's nothing to to be ashamed of.

You know, whether you're tall or short or whatever, it doesn't matter.

You know, it doesn't

define you or whatever.

I don't know why people get so caught up about it.

But then, and try to lie about something so obvious.

Like, everyone can figure it out.

Like, we can see that you're not six feet tall.

I don't know why people do it.

It's really bizarre.

It's

a delusion.

Yeah.

I think he's.

I do think that the

gym thing,

if you do that much,

he must be on steroids or something as well.

And it makes you angry

or testosterone.

It makes you more aggressive.

It's just the weird number pushing, though.

You know, like is it Rachel Reeves

is in the news recently for not to do with her height, but

there's some questions about how long she worked at the

Bank of England or something like that.

They looked at her LinkedIn profile and they found some discrepancies and then she updated her LinkedIn profile immediately because, you know, people were talking about, you know, how it didn't make sense.

She was here at a certain time or whatever.

And you just think, why not just be truthful about it in the first place?

Like in the first place.

Like all of these things, people will find out about you if they want to.

You know, it's not, it's not overly private information.

And especially if you've got it listed on your LinkedIn for everyone to see, you know, like you're a high-profile civil servant.

It's the same thing as just wanting to tell a better story and and then you start thinking that it is true.

It's like the same thing as you know, people misremembering.

Yes, but like, what's the difference?

If you work somewhere for five years and you say you worked there for seven, what, those two years suddenly make it like way better?

Like, I don't think anyone really cares that much, you know, but they'll certainly care when they catch you lying about it.

I think people justify these things to themselves so easily.

They say, well, I've got to be here another two years, so let's just add it now.

It's like, you know, people are people justify themselves anything in very stupid ways often, and they don't necessarily think it will come around to bite them in the ass.

But this guy, I think, is certainly there's this American idea of fake it till you make it or like push, push, push the, you know, really, I think with very high levels of confidence comes some physical aggression, too.

Like, I think you see these guys, they're very they, they, their physical um size makes them frightening, and I think because that they almost feel like it's easy to, you know, all this, all this shit with eye contact.

I don't know, all these alpha male bullshit.

I think a lot of, and you see it on telly as well, right?

You see in Hollywood shows that, that that's how almost how to behave, you know, you're, someone's, someone's insulting you, get up in their face aggressively, physically, you know, someone's, someone's cheat, your wife's cheated on you, you know, you know, go and punch the guy or whatever, you you know it's like you can't like they they feel like they're doing the things they're supposed to do because their education is from watching soap operas not from you know

following anything intelligent anyway yeah it's crazy i i i don't get it i know i i just don't get the with the benefit of just like adding a little bit on you know but people do it all the time like they do it all the time about everything you know like just adding a little bit on like what it just makes it like it's just a little bit extra juice, you know, like for something

nobody

in the first place.

Like, it's, it just doesn't, it, it always, it's just one after another, isn't it?

It always, it always makes me laugh, you know?

Yeah.

All right, let's let's talk weird eating habits.

Go on.

All right.

This one, this is a long preamble.

I'll cut to the chase.

Uh, this lad has two brothers.

They're all healthy, sporty, and sort of young.

So they eat a lot, right?

Their dietary intake, their calorie requirements are very high.

So anytime food arrives in the house, they eat it all.

There's a lot of quarreling, like, and generally speaking, all the food is gone the day it arrives.

So all this food arrives in the house, they're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, they just eat all of it.

It's like this big predatory race for food.

But what happens if one day nobody had the time to buy something to eat?

Well, then it is your time to shine with inventing dishes that are made from seven basic ingredients.

So the seven basic ingredients are, if the bread runs out, use cheese instead of bread.

So it is cheese with marmalade or a pickle cheese sandwich.

So just cheese.

So you're using slices of cheese instead of bread.

In lieu of bread.

So you're wrapping up the food keeps running out.

Jesus.

Okay.

So potatoes, rice, pickles, cheese are good on their own.

I know Pyrrhian has some thoughts regarding combining two types of the same thing, but you'd just be damn happy as long as you have more than one thing to combine.

Just potatoes or just rice is a normal thing to eat in our household a chunk of raw butter if there's any left molten cheese in water which forms cheese soup uh i can share loads more recipes if you're interested greetings from croatia these are not recipes

i understand where he's coming from in that you can you know you've if you've got some cheese and you've got a carb you can do cheese sandwich or cheese on potatoes or cheese on rice or cheese on whatever on a on on whatever right right?

Or whatever carb you've got going.

That makes sense, right?

But as soon as you start swapping out the carb for the cheese, that's where madness lies, right?

That's that's but they're not recipes.

You're just eating any old thing that's available.

Like if there was like a can of pedigree chum, you'd just eat it.

Because you're so hungry, I guess, you know, like it doesn't, it doesn't really matter.

But as soon as you start messing with these ingredients, like no wonder you're running out of food, right?

Because bread is like a, or the rice, you know, that goes a long way.

Okay, the cheese,

you don't have an entire, you know, you don't have an entire slab of cheese.

You're buying cheese slabs instead of

bread slices.

You normally would have a bit of bread.

If you have that much cheese, you probably should have some bread around.

So they,

like, the issue is that they do have, but the problem is it runs out.

It runs out so fast.

Hey, guys, we ran out of tomato soup, so we're just going to drink jam.

It's like, what?

Yeah,

each of them drinks a jar of jam.

Do Do you know what I mean?

No.

That's why you're running out of food.

I understand.

Like, maybe the fridge is bare and you have to put together something from what you've got left over.

And it's an unorthodox meal, but it's only one night a week and you go shopping the next day and you eat normally again for a while.

That's fine.

Not wanting things to go to waste, that's fine.

But like...

Like putting cheese in water and making

hot cheese water, that's not a meal.

That's not a loud well sorry velocity lulu is not on board what's a new recipe for you there hot cheese water yeah hot cheese water all right this is uh this is from fay uh i've been enjoying hearing the bizarre food combo stories in recent episodes never expecting to see such debauchery among my own to my disbelief i just watched my mum mop up the black bean sauce from her mixed veg chinese takeaway meal with a croissant oh

that is grisly that is i don't take that that is grisly yeah i agree with that I

can

understand where this is coming from, especially if you're American, I'm sure you can understand that they're mixing the sweet and salty.

It's very normal.

Having a bacon milkshake, having, you know, they do like to put bacon in just about everything.

Bacon and everything.

You know,

you're seeing it more and more.

People putting, you know, having, we were talking about pancake

the other day.

And, you know, savory pancakes.

Savory pancakes.

You know, even

savory and sweet pancakes, like combining it,

it's starting to be.

Look, everyone loves sugar.

Everyone also loves salt.

So, you know, the sweet, the sweet and salty popcorn.

There's your advert right there.

Hey, sweet rice.

I didn't think I'd like sweet and salted popcorn, but I actually really do.

It's nice.

Yeah, put a little bit of salt on your watermelon.

Delicious.

I like savory shit, but I don't like salt.

What about apples and like sliced apples and peanut butter?

That's another comment.

So that's a banger, but I like, if I'm having cheese, especially really strong cheese, with nice red grapes, amazing.

Amazing.

Like a common beer.

Indeed.

Or, well, no, it would need to be a ripe one.

A ripe one.

A really good ripe blue cheese or a really ripe brie with some blue cheese.

Oh,

delicious.

He has

a blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

This is from Frank.

I'm like you, Flax.

I don't like porridge.

Never did.

But I do eat it raw.

I just eat the oats with a spoonful of Demerara shit.

No.

And my saliva moistens it while it's.

There's no fucking way on this earth that anyone.

Listen, I think what you're doing is

fuck

like an avalanche has like, you know, you're

basically

you're you're turning your body into some sort of saliva factory, right?

Because you're making your body make so much saliva to deal with that that you're going to become an abnormal.

You're going to become like a drooling.

you know what he might do though because if i have uh like a mouth ulcer have you ever had a mouth ulcer and then tried to put like uh you know like igloo or something on it you know like the the treatments that they have for mouth bongela bongela whatever when if i open my mouth and i put my finger into my mouth with like a dot of that stuff on and i apply it to my mouth ulcer I am dribbling everywhere.

Like my saliva is just going is working overtime.

Maybe that could be a trick for you when you're trying to moisten up your oats, you know?

Get a little

bit of bongela.

Even more diluted.

And it'll really excite your saliva glands or whatever.

And

then

you'll have more juice for the oats, you know?

I don't know why it does that, though.

It must be like some sort of like stimulation for the saliva or something.

I don't know, but it's just like, it's like a waterfall.

It's insane.

Like I could barely even get the bongela in there.

It's just like there's so much saliva coming out of my mouth right don't learn these tips this is this is only going to help you turn into a drooling monster please do not do not eat dry granola it's just not dry granola

just

i think he's he's he's just talking about dry oats just dry no i think it's fine i think it's fine it's like i it's like eating

some people eat granola dry that's fine go for it you could put

you can put it in yogurt i'm just worried it'll give you you've got to be careful because some things aren't really meant to be eaten raw like potatoes or mushrooms no

You're supposed to cook them because otherwise, because your body can't digest them.

Man, we can get sort of we had, we bought like just a like a jar of pasta sauce, but we fried up some mushrooms with some onions and some garlic and put it into the pasta sauce.

Oh my God, it was so good.

Wow, I think you've just invented a brand new meal.

I don't think anyone's ever done it.

No, I know everybody does that.

I've never done it before, is what I'm saying.

Wow, I'm just saying.

Usually I just put the sauce on and I eat it.

Like, I, you know, I don't, I don't get fancy with it.

But this time we did, and I was glad that we did.

Well, do it again.

So that was a good idea.

That was getting fancy.

There's the getting fancy recipe for the day.

It's effort.

The problem is it's effort.

Congrats, Joseph.

I'm glad you're branching out finally.

This is from Alex.

It's another weird eating habit.

I love these.

So

this is the one that will get me sent to hell is dunking my bagel in my tea the way Americans dunk doughnuts in coffee.

That is gross.

I think both are gross, though.

Yeah, I think that's it.

I think if you're dunking a donut into a hot drink, that's fucking gross.

Just as gross as dunking anything else into

a hot drink.

Personally.

I just don't dunk.

I'm not a dunker.

I'm not a dunker either.

Dare I say it?

It's a little common.

There you go.

Yeah, I think that's, I think you know.

And here's the thing.

I think that a lot of people like Duncan.

Yeah, they're called northerners.

Filthy, grummy, classless northerners.

You're holding this biscuit and you just looking at the tea and you're like, well, this dunk.

And you just experiment.

And, you know, I think that's a good thing.

I knew someone who used to dunk a Kit Kat, like a stick of Kit Kat into their drink and the chocolate would like melt off of the wafer into the drink.

They would dunk it so much.

And then they would just take it.

You know what the irony is?

The irony is northerners are very precious about tea

and having sugar in tea.

But they won't all give me a nice cup of strong builders tea with barely any milk in it and none of that fucking sugar muck but i will dunk me bicky i can barely oh yes it will be awesome bits of bicky in the bottom of my tea

fuck off double standard

all right here's one uh this is a bad date story

these things give me ptsd dude i swear to just picture this just picture this i was 17 i'd asked out a crush i'd had for a while and this was going to be my second date so far in my life i had my first date at 16, but it didn't go well.

So anyway, we go to Cheesecake Factory and everything had been going more perfect than I could imagine for how nervous I'd felt at the beginning of the night.

Conversation was smooth, no awkward moments or silences.

Unfortunately, when the night was coming to a close, I was coming back from the bathroom and getting back to our table.

A waiter bumped into someone behind me and fell over.

But while he was falling, he tries to break his fall by grabbing onto something and that something ends up being my trousers.

I would have been so happy if it was just my trousers that had been pulled down, but my underwear came down as well.

And I fully flashed my date while I quickly try to pull my pants back up.

Whoa.

Also,

I am a grower and not a shower.

So that did not help me when she had told all her friends.

And I heard it in school the next day after being horribly embarrassed.

Surprisingly, we dated for two years until we broke up when she moved to California.

Oh, wow.

An actual happy ending.

Fuck Jesus.

Well, that stuff is like, you know, that stuff is like that.

You might be able to laugh it off, okay?

And it might just, it might bring you closer together.

You know, these things happen.

Sometimes they can bring you closer together, yeah.

Oh, I've got a story, but I'm not going to tell it until

you can't say that.

It's too live.

It's too long.

It's related, but it's, it's too recent.

Please tell it.

No, I can tell you once time has gone by.

What's wrong?

What do you mean it's too fresh?

It's too fresh.

It's happening right now.

It's happening.

Was it really cringe?

It's happening right now.

It's happening.

It's too cringe.

It's too fresh.

You can't come.

No, you can't do it.

I'll tell you later.

Oh, you can't do it.

I haven't got that many stories that you'll hear it eventually.

So now we've just got to wait a couple of weeks for the cringe to die down a little bit.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I can't live with that.

I've got a story about I haven't managed to phrase it in my head how comfortable I am.

If I do it now, I'll be giving away too much influence.

Can you at least tell me about it after we finish recording otherwise i will not be able to do anything for the rest of the day okay i'll tell you you just cease to function i will this is uh this is from kayla i thought i'd share my strange way of eating now kayla i've read this email ahead this is not strange this is revolting uh and honestly pretty abhorrent behavior don't do it when eating a pizza i will scrape off the topping with a fork and eat that then move on to the pizza dough which i usually eat using also a knife and fork.

Similarly with lasagna, I will scrape off the layer of of meat and sauce, eat that, then roll the lasagna sheet into a tube and eat that.

I do this with each layer until finished.

And then has the gall to say, I completely agree, the best way to eat a meal is to save the best component until last.

You're doing the opposite, Kayla.

You're literally, the dough is just there.

The dough is delicious.

You're just breaking it down into its components and eating it component at a time.

Like, rather than

eating like a fucking printer.

Do you know what I mean?

Like a robot.

Stop it.

Eating like a printer, like one of those dot matrix.

Just eating one line at a time only.

Oh my God.

Just mix.

Just

go full chaos when you're eating.

Just mix it all up, man.

So good.

This is from Martin.

This is another weird eating one.

This is a weird way to eat food, apple puree.

When I was little, until a long way into my teenage years i used to put apple puree on everything i hope you know what uh i mean it's applemus in german so it's like uh applesauce just apples so so i make this routine well i used to when i when i grew up i had a couple of apple trees at the end of my garden cooking apple trees the apples are disgusting yeah but what you can do is you could just put them in a little pot on the hob and melt them down and they turn into a nice applesauce with a little bit of sugar and yeah i would eat it hot and cold throughout the year and uh recently um we accidentally ended up with a whole fucking bag of apples.

Do the same.

It's nice.

I recommend it.

I'd like it.

Would you have it on mashed potatoes?

I mean, it is something you can eat with some.

I used to eat it with like, you know, some pork or whatever.

That's the best thing to eat it with.

It's a very standard thing, right?

Yeah.

But as a result, you can eat it with other things.

All right.

So I'll give you a list of things that Martin eats it with.

Mashed potatoes.

And I'll say yes.

I'll say yes or no.

Mashed potatoes.

Mashed potatoes.

Sure.

Vegetables.

Yes.

I think it would work with some vegetables.

Maybe not all.

It depends.

French fries.

I disagree with

mashed potatoes.

Also, French fries.

Yeah, no, thanks.

No.

Right, what about tomato soup?

No way.

No.

Well, Martin did.

Well, good for Martin.

I mean, Jesus.

So

fucking,

I'm not eating this.

Just put like a big dollop inside the soup.

He wanted to cool his soup down.

So we added some apple mousse.

And he was like, Oh, yaz, this is delicious.

Flavor of tomato on the apple mus really brings the best out of the dish.

Oh, God.

This is this is why we had to this is why we had to stop you in World War II.

I'm sorry.

Urban Romal action came up with jar of apple mus

realistic eating action.

Emergency tins of tomato soup.

Tins of tomato soup.

Zoop.

Zoop.

What?

Apple muzzle.

Oh, God.

Get heaven.

That is funny.

Please.

No, none of those things.

Maybe with some vegetables, applesauce.

But I remember having applesauce with

pork.

And it is a good thing.

That's the classic.

That's a classic combo.

I don't have it myself.

I don't like the applesauce with the pork.

I just like the pork.

I don't need anything else.

When I have lamb, I don't need the mint sauce.

You don't see

the flavor.

You don't see a lot of applesauce over here.

I remember when I was in Canada,

lots of applesauce.

Lots of big jars of applesauce.

Martin has been to Jersey and eaten all of the apple musa.

Oh, no.

Pull it down my neck.

Y'all.

All right.

This is

from Chris.

Chris from Berry.

Nice.

Happened around 10 years ago in Manchester.

Each year, the company I work for pays for a hotel function for us and the partners, and then we stay at the hotel overnight.

Towards the end of the night, the wine was flowing.

Everyone was having a great time until it became apparent that one of the supervisors, let's call him Jay for privacy reasons, had had far too much to drink.

He was boldly flirting with other people's partners, nearly got into a fight with another worker, and had a huge bust up with his own partner about all of this, who ended up storming off.

Me and my wife decided the night was coming to a close anyway, so we escorted him up to his room where he drunkenly slurred good night, disappeared into his room, and we retired to our own.

6am, we're woken up with the sound of the fire alarm going off.

Lasted for five seconds, then turned off again.

Mouth shocked awake, and the alarm having not sounded for a few minutes, I went to the toilet.

Mid-hangover poo, the alarm goes off again, longer this time.

So I finish up in a panic, only for it to turn off again.

The alarm then turned off and on every few minutes, about four times.

I got dressed, headed down to reception to find out what the hell was going on.

At the reception, I was greeted to the sight of our HR lady having a heated conversation with the receptionist.

Jay is asleep on the lobby couch, and Jay's partner is sat next to him crying.

with strangely wet pajama pants at the bottom.

It turns out after we saw him into his room, he decided to run himself a bath, get in it while it was still running, and then fall asleep.

His entire room flooded and the water leaked through the floor and short-circuited the fire alarm.

He woke up in the bath naked to the side of the hotel manager standing around, telling him he needed to get out of the bath and leave.

The worst part was because the fire alarm had tripped, it cut off the gas supply to the hotel, which meant they couldn't cook the all-you-can-eat buffet breakfast, which my hangover was crying out for.

He left the company shortly after, so I never found out if he got hit with repair costs, but our company refused to pay for his mistakes.

Good heavens, why do people do this at work dues especially yeah well it's it's just alcohol isn't it just makes you do crazy stuff you know like uh you've like fall asleep in a bath like

you should never do that you should you should not have a bath if you think there's even a remote chance of you falling asleep there's so many there's so many people at fault here right though obviously like whoever okay first of all whoever made him like this okay well god well how did how did he how did he end up like this was it what was it that led him down this

god's plan like the people at the work do over you know not not giving him enough supervision on like drinks and stuff and you know no no one like being his wingman or convincing him out of it three girlfriend was in the room didn't notice there's a some sort of bath running and water coming out until the whole place is flooded what's going on there was she obviously like that's mad like there's there's so many like people here that could have helped him along.

I'm saying this guy, maybe he wasn't so bad.

Maybe he just had a few bad role models and bad friends.

You're blaming his friends for this guy being a useless bust.

I'm blaming the writer in, listener.

Listen, geez.

You did this.

You created this one.

Just think about that.

Just think about that.

Yeah.

Fuck it all.

Wow.

That is, that is.

That man sounds like chaos incarnate.

We all know someone who is like that, though, kind of, you know, just a...

just a

wild, unpredictable character when they've had a drink, you know?

They have, have, they have a crazy, they go off the rails.

Um, I think it's just it might have just been excited, excitedness to be allowed to set himself, be really himself, you know.

Maybe everyone was too making him too comfortable, maybe it was too casual of a setting, you know.

Maybe you should have the boss should have been more formal, more serious with people, put down some better rules, maybe get them to sign a code of conduct.

Do you know what I mean?

Like, you gotta have

a remote works once and it's the first time he'd been around people for a very long time.

Exactly, it might be exactly and then the boss

was cancel remote maybe there's like a culture of you know like like a culture of of laddish behavior in the company well i'm not sure why but lewis has chosen this story to become uh the the devil's advocate for this this drunken slob at a at a work party somebody

seems to be blaming everybody

but the drunken man yeah pretty remarkable you're like uh one of those southern lawyers with the

my client your honor if it please the court my client could not be trusted with alcohol his emportion and all

that's that's what you were doing okay look it was my first work due right and i was young and naive and i didn't know better all right you just really wanted to i was going through some i was going through some my dog had died

and was the body stolen by someone who thought they were nick and dj equipment yeah there was like suitcases everywhere full of dead dogs all right this is from james this is calling me out i'm absolutely outraged by your comments about cinemas.

Sorry to hear you've had a negative experience with chain cinemas, but that sounds like a local problem.

At the View Basingstoke, they've made every chair a recliner sofa, and you can bring your own food and drink in.

And the price is still the same as a standard ticket.

Come to Basingstoke.

It's basically heaven here.

Look how good we are in Basingstoke.

Fuck off.

I appreciate a lot of the shit you spout, but on this one, I can safely say not all of the chain cinemas are bad.

James, you're describing an Everyman cinema.

View of copying everyman because they're desperately trying to claw back some business that actually good cinema experiences are taken away from.

So you can dress up your view basing stoke as much as you like.

Downsides.

Number one, it's in basing stoke.

That's it.

That's all we need.

Yeah.

Also, 24 quid for a hot dog,

some popcorn, and a sweet pack of sweets.

Yeah.

That's what that's a review.

24 quid.

It's insane.

And then this is a review from

a month ago.

Visited this cinema for the 11 a.m.

viewing of Gladiator 2.

Screen was broken, glaring, bright white light on the screen, ruining the open of the movie, and wasting an hour of my time.

The manager only allowed the refund of my ticket and not the egregiously priced snacks, which I had to leave behind because I didn't watch the movie.

What?

They expect me to wander around Basingstoke with a giant Coke and massive bag of popcorn?

What an absolute joke.

I would highly recommend you do not visit this cinema.

It's badly maintained.

The manager clearly has no idea about customer service.

There you go.

Just bring your own.

I love that as well.

Like,

here's your cinema is cancelled.

Here's your money back.

Just take that massive

bucket of popcorn and Coke

home with you.

Why are you buying all that at the movies?

Like, just bring your own stuff.

You can, you know, like,

especially nowadays, you've got a backpack.

They say, oh, what's your backpack for?

Just say, oh, I've got a disability or something.

Just say, you're in.

You're in disabled.

You're allowed to take a bag anyway.

Oh, I've got a disability or something, mate.

What are they going to do?

Like, fucking, oh, do you have any documentation or look you up or whatever?

Like, I don't think they care that much.

They just ask the question.

You say anything, and then in you go with your snacks.

Not.

You could just say, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

And they would let you in.

You're right.

Nobody is trying to enforce that.

They just, they're told that they have to say it, but you know, I don't think they're going to take it any further than that.

What are they going to do?

Your hand comes down on your shoulder.

Shit on the floor.

They got their boot on your neck, like searching your bag and stuff.

What is this?

Mango?

You got some dry mango?

Oh, that's it.

Shoot them, Lenny.

Just fucking kill him.

Jesus.

Take your own snacks is

what I'm saying.

It's a lot cheaper.

This isn't Nazi Germany.

Do what you want, a view-basing stack.

They can't buy the overpriced snacks.

Smuggle in a burger.

Bring your own meal.

Yeah.

Why not, you know, why not cook yourself a jar of pasta sauce?

Maybe cook some extra onions on the side, pop them in there.

I saw a guy cook a chicken in a hotel bathroom with a couple of doodads and whatnots.

You take that into the cinema, no problem.

I had a fight.

I took Subway into a cinema one time.

A whole Subway with a cookie and a bag of chips, everything.

No problem.

Sounds great.

Just put it in my bag.

As long as you don't make too much noise.

Or, you know, like, come on, no rustling.

There are no.

Don't be rustling.

It doesn't matter.

Nobody goes to the fucking cinema anymore anyway.

You're in there alone half the time anyway.

So you can make as much noise as you want.

Who cares?

Oh,

it really does rage people, though, when you.

Because I was in the cinema the other, I saw I told you this.

I was in the cinema and I was chatting away with, I think, Alex or Rambler or whatever while the adverts were on.

And I got rambling with the Rambler.

Who shushed you?

During the adverts.

During the adverts?

The man stood up in front of me and he looked at me in straining eye and shushed me.

And I was like, I was like, dude, it's the adverts.

Like, you know, sorry, I didn't realize.

Some people love the adverts, though, to be fair to him.

What do you mean, the trailers or the ads?

The trailers.

No, the adverts before the trailers.

Oh, although he can shut the fuck up.

I know.

It's so loud in there anyway.

It's not like you're missing anything.

It shook me up.

It shook me up, actually.

Oh, sorry, mate.

Sorry.

No, that was an ad for Pepsi.

If you missed that, didn't mean to talk over the ad for Pepsi.

Well, it wasn't.

That's what I wanted to do.

Well, I'll go with you next time and we'll hopefully someone will start on us and I'll give them a fucking mouthful about that.

Yeah, you can like, you know, throw your applesauce in their face and like, you know, fix this out from us and get out.

I don't know if I've ever told anybody ever to be quiet anywhere in my whole life, you know?

I don't think I have either.

I think I've wanted to.

Told my kids to pipe down.

Well, I tell my kids to pipe down.

Pipe down, you two.

I tell my kids to pipe down all the time as well, but I don't think I've ever had to say to another adult, can you be quiet or whatever?

Well, but a lot of adults are less mature than your kids.

So, I mean, they should really be true.

You should really not be worried about doing it.

I just don't know.

Some of them need to be told, you know?

I feel like some people just lead such hectic, unnecessarily hectic lives, like through their decisions and stuff.

You know, like, why, why be so confrontational?

Like, you see these videos on.

They can't be that hectic.

They're going to be sitting in a cinema for three hours.

They're in time for the advert.

No, but I mean

I wonder if like if everywhere they go, there's some sort of altercation or if this or if these are isolated events.

Like the fact that they're doing it leads me to believe it's not isolated.

I think there is a type of person that will just find issue with every single thing everywhere they go.

You know, oh, well, I mean, they're not being served fast enough at a restaurant.

They weren't picked to be served at the bar.

Somebody's talking in the cinema.

Somebody's on their phone in the cinema.

Somebody's talking too loud on the train.

You know what I mean?

And it's just, it's like, it's everything.

But

it's a type, though, isn't it?

Yeah.

Well, you could understand.

Maybe you're at work, dude, and your girlfriend's being really annoying.

And so you start drinking.

And then the guy to the left, he's eating lasagna weird like a printer.

And then

someone else is like doing some weird voice and it's like driving you crazy.

So you start drinking more.

And you think, oh, maybe we'll just have some fun.

You know, we'll chat to some of the people you haven't spoken to.

So you chat to some of the other

people and everyone thinks you're flirting with other people's girlfriends and you're like, oh, God, and someone spills their tomato sauce all over you.

So you go to bed and you have a little, you think, I'll have a quick bath, fall asleep.

I don't know why you love this.

Suddenly, your life's ruined.

Why are you in love with that?

Dog in a suitcase?

Yeah.

Dead dog in a suitcase.

Maybe he was just, maybe, maybe it was

just that one final shush that pushed him over the edge and caused him to drink so much, you know?

Maybe he was.

I did, I did shush someone in a cinema one time.

I didn't, I didn't shush because I hate shushing.

If someone shushes me.

During the adverts.

No, it was during the film.

These, there were three lads behind us, me and Mrs.

F, this was years ago, and they were naturing away.

Like, they weren't like teenagers.

They were like, you know, our age.

They were like early 20s.

And they were just talking at normal volume while the film was on.

And I gave them the half turn, you know, when they were talking, especially loudly, thinking, oh, they'll notice and be like, oh, we should be quiet.

Nothing.

They keep talking.

So I turned around and I said, you guys, please stop talking.

We're trying to watch the movie.

And the middle one, it turned out they were quite posh.

He said, you arrogant shit.

But then they did shut up.

I was like, how the fuck am I the arrogant one?

Your conversation is more important than

pounds than we've had to spend on this fucking thing.

I think the

COVID did this thing to people where everyone starts thinking they're gogglebox.

Do you know what I mean?

And they sit there with their mates and they comment funny bits on the video.

And that's what it's like when you watch a movie at home with your friends.

You know, people will be making jokes and stuff throughout it, right?

But

when you actually go to a cinema, it's not that.

Um, and I think people have something they often often forget that, especially if they're catching up with an old friend.

You know, it's always, you know, I've had a similar thing with some old ladies behind me who were like chatting away the whole movie, you know, about absolute drivel.

Um, and someone told them to shush, yeah.

Oh, we've been shushed, Nora.

Oh, dear,

I can't believe believe we've who's shush what did he say he said shush oh we weren't talking loud we were with

the trembling voice

i hope i never need to shush another person yeah i hope i i hope i don't become the shusher or the shushy you know like

i'm just going to watch a movie you know occasionally i can't remember i could probably count on the, on, on one hand, the amount of times where I've thought, oh, that person is being like, you know, a bit loud or a bit weird at the movies or whatever.

But it doesn't happen very often at all, I would say.

It's pretty rare.

One time I went to a movie with my wife and two of my kids, and I can't remember what we were seeing, but there was a group of like, it must have been like eight teenage girls sitting in front of us.

And I don't think they caught any of the movie.

Like they were just on their phones talking and constantly leaving the theater like just forever leave like two of them would leave and then uh four would leave and two would come back and they were just constantly in and out of the theater like none not one of them was paying attention to the movie but even then like we just sat there and watched the movie like it wasn't it wasn't bad you know but but that that is one time that kind of sticks out where i might have even been remotely close to saying to somebody can you please like stop standing up right in front of the movie all the time or whatever but even then i didn't i don't know maybe i'm a pushover

well let's call it a day on on uh on that that's uh that's a good one that's a good one to end on i really enjoyed that that was a great one thank you so much for all the mails as usual yeah very nice

coming so many i wanted to read out but uh you know we only have so long true

a thank you if you didn't get thank you you don't need to email and ask why it didn't get picked maybe you did get picked but it just didn't we ran out of time and then i you know i've had other emails in i'm sorry i know you guys are fantastic sending them in We really appreciate it.

I have a lot of fun reading them, and some of them are just really lovely messages.

Yeah, thank you for those too.

Um, so yeah, keep them coming.

We'll see you next week.

Goodbye.

Bye.

Bye.