Triforce #312: Gamer Rage (the Musical)

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Hello, everyone.

Welcome back to the Triforce podcast.

Oh,

how are you doing, P-Flex?

I am doing great.

I had a fantastic evening last night.

Me and a couple of my mates went to see a singer that we like, Katie J.

Pearson is her name, and she played at a place called Coco.

It's up in Camden.

Well,

not quite Camden, Mornington Crescent, but it was like, it was such a good gig, and she was brilliant, and it was just a great evening.

So I'm...

What kind of music is it?

Oh, it's indie,

but it's sort of, I suppose you could say there's a little bit of a country twang to it.

Her voice is remarkable.

She's got a great voice.

And she did a cover of a song by Heart called Alone, which is one of my favorite heart songs.

And she was so good.

Her band were excellent.

She was amazing.

It was brilliant.

It was a really, really good gig.

And it made me very happy.

And me and my mates got really drunk and it was fantastic.

Nice.

But what was interesting, when we walked into Coco, me and my mate were like, it smells amazing in here.

It smelled really good.

Like the whole place just smelled.

Like a fruity smell.

No, it was just really lovely.

Almost like, you know, when someone's got like potpourri or something, it was like all these lovely smells.

I said to Mrs.

F this morning about how nice it smelled, she goes, well, that's because you went to see a woman singer instead of like some sweaty bunch of blokes there.

It was mainly, it was like a lot of women and women smell nice.

And I was like, that's a good point.

So I think it was

a combined aroma of perfuming that gave it like an incense cloud.

Yes, I genuinely think it might have been that.

I don't know.

I mean, I've had lots of tradesmen in recently.

And

recently I've noticed they've yeah, they do actually.

Some of them, I don't know what shower gel or whatever they're using, but like some of them actually smell really good, you know?

I feel like they've got like this job that's kind of like gets them all sweaty and it's rough and they get dirty and stuff.

And then they go home and they have a shower, but they've got like really nice shower gel.

Interesting.

They don't skimp on it or something.

Like it doesn't smell,

just it smells good, you know?

I'm proud of those guys for coming into my house and smelling so good.

Because they smell better than me.

I wake up in the morning, I stink.

Those guys turn up at 7.30 a.m.

They smell great.

Women smell nice.

You're hearing it now for the first time on the Triforce podcast.

Yeah.

Men stink.

I just wanted to balance things out.

I don't want to, you know,

I want to

give a shout out to good smelling men out there as well.

I know women smell great.

This is known.

But let's not forget about the men either.

Or let's, what you've been up to this week, Sips?

What have you been doing?

I've been playing a lot of Marvel Rivals, like some sort of weird crack addict.

It's my most recent obsession.

I've been playing a lot.

But

you went down the Overwatch hole.

This is Overwatch.

I did.

It's a

same hole.

It's the same hole.

New game, same hole.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And

is there any chance you climbing out of that hole?

Well, I'm sure eventually, yeah.

I was looking at Enshrouded, which I might pick up.

I was watching

Lemmy play it for a little bit the other day, and it looked pretty cool.

It looks like

Terraria, kind of.

You know, you gather a lot of people together and make a settlement.

You know, it ticks a lot of boxes for me.

I think I'll check it out.

Yeah, me and Doug could have ravs and really enjoyed it, actually.

Enshrouded, we did the sponsor video on it as well.

And we were big fans.

So, yeah, grab a couple of your mates and give it a go.

It is a good, it's a good

problem

to playing rivals

extensively.

So, oh, you could pull a few people out of that for a few hours.

I'm sure they'll love to.

Yeah.

Love playing as reality.

It was a real nice, nice, fun game.

I watched you playing Civ 7 yesterday, Lulu, with Dunk.

Yeah.

I watched some of that.

And I couldn't tell.

What do you think of it?

Yeah.

Okay.

Let's move on.

No, I.

Okay, here's my take on Civ 7 real quick.

Civ games change completely every time.

So for some reason, they decide to completely reinvent the wheel every time

the new Civ game comes out.

and it's got a new graphics engine it's got a new ui which isn't very good and it's got a lot of things that are missing that i think they just forgot about a lot of things are like that there's this always complaint that when a new one comes out they didn't put in something from the previous one and and so you know they try to do that like they've got volcanoes in this one do you see what i mean but it's kind of like one at one 80th of what they were like in the previous one.

Do you see what I mean?

It's just like a little snapshot of that to like stop the, you know, people say, well, this one doesn't have volcanoes.

Well, it does, but like, they're not as good, you know, or interesting.

And that goes for everything about the game, right?

The thing I don't like about it mostly is the way 2K have, I think, okay, personally, the whole, you know, that the process of a game where the game is.

is £60, but a Founders edition is £90 and you get the early access.

And then the actual deluxe edition is £120, right?

So they fully lean into that over the last sort sort of 10 years with Civ.

And yes, I don't mind paying for an expansion, but to be, and we know that Civ games don't get good until the second expansion.

And this one's okay.

So first of all, it's clearly been rushed out the door because the third age is completely unfinished.

And, you know, you can't, it's, it's, it's, no one's, no one's played it.

It feels like no one's played the third age.

um or like they just didn't get there they focus so hard on the first six hours of the game that the last three hours kind of not there

when i i i know kingdom Kingdom Come Deliverance 2 came out like yesterday or the day before.

And everything I've seen about it is really positive.

And people are like, this game functions and it feels good and complete.

And Boulder's Gate was like that as well.

Civ is a game.

Civ 6 was fucking years ago.

They've had a lot of time to work on this.

So it can't be rushed out the door.

It can't be barely finished.

It's not like they're designing something from scratch.

It's a Civ game.

Just make a provoking Civ game.

How are you?

their philosophy is very much like

they want to keep a third the same, improve a third, and add the third new stuff, which makes sense on paper, right?

But when they look at Civ, they've got to, they've got this difficult area where they have to keep the existing audience happy, but add new things.

So they look at Civ 6 and they're like, okay, what do we not like about Civ 6?

The first thing they note is that there's still some buildings going on in the city, which doesn't really make very much sense.

So let's build those outside the city.

But then you realize there's so many buildings that you can't possibly build them outside the city.

So you've got to build two per tile.

It's like, okay,

they've almost had this like little discussion where they're like, well, how do we solve this problem?

Well, let's just add two per tile.

Right.

And they're like, can we do that?

And it's like, well, yeah, we could just call them quarters.

And, but as a result, like that ends up with these really strange,

strange, it's just a very hodgepodge, a very, very confusing to a new player for almost no reason.

And I think there's a lot of design decisions that have been made in that same sense.

Like, well, we don't like this.

So how can we change it without changing too much?

And a lot of the stuff is also like, well, let's keep this the same because people like this.

Like social policy cards.

Everyone loved those from Civ 6.

You know, do you remember opening that menu and looking through that massive list of cards and it didn't really tell you what any of them did?

It was like plus 25% building maintenance happiness.

You're like, what the fuck does that mean?

And you slot the card in.

and your science goes up and you're like, oh, how the fuck has this happened?

Do you see what I mean?

You have no idea from because there's no proper tooltips, there's no proper fucking understanding of what stuff means.

There's like a lot of stuff.

It's like you built this, and it's like certainly when I watch building, it replaces your warehouse.

It's like, what does what even is that?

Yeah, when I when I watched you guys playing it, I felt I felt like I was very confused.

Uh, and there were a lot of a lot of the UI.

We are people who've played a lot of all the games, yeah.

Potato put out two videos, I saw them, yeah, yeah, mostly for like viral meme marketing.

One saying Civ 7 is a 0 out of 10 terrible game.

And the other video was Civ 7 is a 10 out of 10 masterpiece, where he basically talks about the things he liked in one and things he didn't like in the other.

I thought that was really funny.

He is the

pro the

Civ Seven, the Civ content creator, really.

And this is his bread and butter.

And he kind of

got to give some criticism because he's going to have to be playing this game for the next two years, you know, on his channel.

Poor boy.

But fortunately, I don't.

I don't expect.

I didn't expect to like it.

I've enjoyed in my experiences so far.

But would I pay £90 for it, early access, and then another £300 over the next two years to get all the other Civs and DLCs unlocked?

You're going to say no?

No.

Not really.

I would, I think, like, I'll play it because my friends are playing it and I'm.

How did it feel stable, the multiplayer?

Did it feel okay?

No, it desigged a lot.

Fantastic.

All right.

Well, let's move on to the most depressing news.

Yeah.

I think it's the same guy who's been doing bad net code for all the Civ games and he still works there.

Stay to fire him.

Here's a change of message to you.

If you're the same guy who's been doing it for

a message to you at 2K or whoever you are, good on you for still having a job there.

Staying under the radar.

What a lad.

What a stay.

I applaud you.

All right, I found an interesting Billy Joel fact the other day.

You know, Billy Joel.

Yeah, go for it.

Billy Joel, who was married to Christy Brinkley.

Billy Joel.

That Billy Joel.

Yeah, yeah, the singer.

The piano man.

Exactly.

He attended Hicksville High School in Hicksville, which I thought was fictional because Hicksville seems like an insult for somebody who lives in the country.

Dude, go back to Hicksville, but it's a real place.

Until 1967, but he did not graduate with his class.

He was playing at a piano bar to help support himself, his mother, and sister, and missed a crucial English exam after playing a late-night gig the evening before.

Although Joel was a comparatively strong student, at the end of his senior year, he did not have enough credits to graduate.

Rather than attend summer school to earn his diploma, he decided to begin a music career.

I told him to hell with it.

If I'm not going to Columbia University, I'm going to Columbia Records, and you don't need a high school diploma over there.

So he never graduated high school.

In 1992, he submitted essays to the school board in lieu of the missed exam.

They were accepted, and he was awarded his diploma at Hicksville High's annual graduation ceremony 25 years after leaving.

So he went to graduate his high school 25 years after he left.

I thought that was great.

I loved that.

What is it?

That's a good story, but it's also, if you worked for that school and Billy Joel got in contact and said, can I come to your school?

All you need to do is give me a diploma.

You'd be like, yeah, fucking absolutely.

He's a, he's famous, right?

He's famous.

Yeah.

He probably didn't actually have to do any other stuff, any other exams.

And to be perfectly honest, a high school diploma to him, to them, no one cares.

Like it's, I think you can, you know, I'm honestly surprised that schools can just give out high school diplomas to anyone they need.

don't.

He had to pass an exam.

He didn't, though, did he?

He had to submit some essays in lieu 25 years later when the syllabus are completely changed.

Gosh, you're a bollock.

Grumpy bugger.

Or it may still check you up.

Billy Joel, I think Billy Joel has had some issues with his band in the past as well.

Like, I think he was being a bit of a prick to them.

I'm sure.

No, I didn't say he was a prick.

I'm just saying, like.

No, but I think he is known as, like, I think a lot of

his former bandmates are like, oh,

he was a nightmare to work with and stuff.

Yeah, I can't.

He didn't pay them well, and all sorts.

I do.

Correct me if I'm wrong, listeners, but I think that might be the case with Billy Joel.

I don't know.

If you're a Billy Joel fan, let us know

if he's a prick to his band.

He broke up with Christy Brinkley as well,

which is.

Sorry, she was a prick as well.

Maybe she was really boring.

Yeah, I think that's why he did.

It was something like that.

I'm sorry, I'm so grumpy all of of this.

Sorry, Billy Joel.

What's happened?

Sorry, I just have to

bend down very far to speak to you face-to-face, Billy Joel, about your breaking up with Chrissy Brinkley.

I'm not sure what was going through your damn mind, but

I think we are just assuming that every

celebrity is secretly an asshole.

We're scared to say we like anything, anyone, because who knows what's going to happen, you know?

Yeah.

Because

we've got the planes coming into the land today.

It must be the

busy time.

You know, you know what they're doing, eh?

What, the planes?

They're booking even more and more planes so that they can turn around and be like, we need this third runway.

That's what they're doing.

They're already a capacity as it is.

All right, so let me tell you guys a story.

This happened to my friend, one of the mates I went out with last night.

I'll read it to you.

I'll remove anything like identifying, obviously.

Hi, hope everyone is having a good evening.

I'm not.

The builders covered our extension floor in something called called blackjack earlier, which is basically like a liquid black tar.

Whilst my son had mates over and my wife was on work calls, one of the fucking cats decided to vault over the seven-foot barrier the builders had put in place and walk through the stuff.

She then exited via the open back doors, came in through the cat flap and trod tar up the stair carpet.

No one is helping me to do anything about it, so I trap the cat in our bedroom where I don't care about the carpet and get to work on cleaning the stairs.

Finally, my wife comes off her call, by which point the cat is freaking out because the tar has set and her paws have just gone like big clumps.

My wife googles that oily products like butter help to break down the tar and get it out.

So we start trying to get some butter into the cat's paws,

which does have some effect, but my wife leaves the door open and the cat wriggles free, bolts back down the stairs, this time leaving a trail of buttery tar prints.

By this point, I'm seriously losing my rag.

We eventually get hold of the cat again.

It's been close to one and a half hours trying to bathe a cat.

A bathroom was utterly caked in tar, which again took an eternity to clean.

We've ruined four towels, a bath mat, the rug in our bedroom, and the stairs aren't looking great.

The cat's paws are only marginally better.

This whole process has taken about three hours.

I would have just thrown that cat in the bin just as a write-off.

I thought you were going to say we spent three hours murdering our cat because that's what I would have been doing.

Poor cat.

That is a real, that is a real, that is one of the things that you have.

That's a peril of having the cats there is

pet ownership is you think they're really smart your cat but no they have one orange brain cell oh yeah there are some people that think their cats are smart listen your cats are moron i'm sorry every cat there is the occasional cat that is smart for a cat but they're still thick as anything they're they are very stupid animals oh my goodness hey speaking of uh animals uh guess who is uh awake from his hibernation and thriving already

Yeah, it's been eight weeks.

It's about young Terry is like,

it was his first big hibernation, so

six to eight weeks is pretty good for him.

And did he really just do fuck all when he was hibernating?

He just literally

just slept the whole time.

I checked on him every day, and he was really cold.

He was like a block ice, and he was asleep.

Every time I checked on him, he would like, his leg would move a little bit, or he'd like adjust or whatever.

Sometimes I'd check on him in the morning and he'd be not where he was when I chose to see.

I checked on him.

He was still alive.

Is that what the idea is?

Yeah.

Well, yeah, of course.

Yeah, you got to make sure that he's still.

He was like, let you know that he was still alive as well.

He gives you a little wave.

That's right.

I'm okay, Chris.

Don't worry.

How about me?

I'm just sleeping.

Can you treat me somebody?

I don't like to think of him speaking like that.

It's not

me.

Yeah, that's what I like.

I got him talking like Gandalf in there.

And

you're coming at me with the tiny Tim, which I don't like.

Please close the door, Chris.

Don't let the cold out.

Do you know what I got?

Yeah, I didn't let the cold out.

So

last day, Mrs.

F bought me a weighted blanket because I have trouble sleeping in general.

And apparently these things are great.

This blanket weights so fucking much that

getting it onto the bed, I was like, Jesus.

But it really does.

I feel as snug as a tortoise in a fridge.

It was really, really lovely.

I slept really well.

I feel like I'm hibernating when I'm under my weighted blanket.

It's fantastic.

I recommend it.

Yeah, they are way heavier than you think.

What do they put in there?

I feel like it's just like a duvet cover, but with like those plates like in Rainbow Siege, you know, the ones you slide into your armor.

Is it something like that?

No, it's like,

I don't, I assume that it's a honeycomb inside.

And inside the honeycomb, a very fine honeycomb, you can feel these balls, tiny little glass beads.

Wow.

Just like loads and loads and loads and loads of them.

So it feels a bit like a bean bag or like one of those kind of things.

And it's not like you tip it on its side and all the balls run to one end.

And is it kind of like them?

Very.

Wow.

Very.

Like, if you've ever sort of, like, you know, obviously.

You and I both, I assume you share a duvet with your wife like I do.

So we've got like a duvet or we have a sheet in the summer or whatever.

Yes.

There's always that little gap, and you know, sometimes you can't quite get that.

Your feet are cold or whatever.

The weighted blanket sits over you and encompasses and presses everything down so much that you're like in a snug pocket.

You're like the inside of a Cornish pasty.

Yeah, that's you.

And you're just, there's this coating all around you that's just not moving.

And the pressure down on you is kind of reassuring.

It's like being swabbled as a grown-up.

Yeah, it's nice.

Yes.

I loved it.

It was so, so good i recommend it yeah mine is

we still have it's not for everyone it's not for everyone

still wakes up in the night and uh comes into our bed so i've got like this i got this technique where basically my like my back and my ass actually the back of my legs are sticking out one side of the duvet because i have to overcompensate on the other side i have to make like a little barrier because otherwise i'm getting slapped and kicked and sometimes even worse i'm getting like

a toe in my ribs or like a toe like in my back.

And it's

yeah, God, it is so annoying when it wakes you up and you're just like, Oh, God, like, who is doing this?

And then you realize that

it's one of my people, but they're driving me nuts.

And you, so yeah, I just, I don't know.

I think I can, at this point, I can sleep anywhere, uh, anyhow, you know.

I could sleep standing up in the cold, even.

Like, you just get used to not having ideal sleep conditions with little kids, you know.

I guess you've been through it three times as well.

Yeah, yeah, it's with different sleep, sleepers, yeah.

Well, you know, it's um,

people want to peep, you're their weighted blanket, sips.

They want to be reassured.

Yeah, it must be.

Yeah, I think I must generate a lot of heat.

As I'm like quite a, quite a warm person.

I think I got good circulation or something.

That's with the shorts and stuff.

Yeah, I'm always warm.

Um, and you know, like if I get into a bed, that thing is is like it's it's it's cooking, it's it's it's going like you know, oven heat in there

with my with my the body heat that I give off.

Um, so I don't know, maybe they like that, you know, maybe they maybe they just like that, like a warm bed, you know, don't need a heated blanket or anything.

I'm like a little reactor or a big one, a big reactor in many, in many ways.

All my reaction content on uh YouTube as well.

Love reacting to things, love a good reaction.

What are you burning in that furnace?

Mostly

cheese.

Yeah, lots of cheese, bread.

There's oil.

Yeah, there's some oil in there too.

But yeah, mostly just those types of carbs.

Yeah.

Just

burning like

burning bright.

Burning all.

Oh, I made another song.

Great.

If you guys want to hear it.

Yeah, I do.

You do?

Sure.

This is.

You do?

Well, you went.

Great.

So I like that.

No, no.

I'm excited.

I like your songs.

All right.

This is called Sips.

Oh, God.

Oh, God.

You ready?

Yep.

Yes.

Three, two, one.

Play.

Oh,

you can hear a little electric guitar in the back there, distorted as well.

Fuck!

Oh, God!

Fuck!

Oh!

Thanks, Flex.

Great!

Oh, God!

Oh, God!

Did you recall this this week when he was doing the Marvel Rivals?

Oh, man.

Great.

Where did you get all those clips?

That's just...

That was.

I wanted one of you getting angry, and I thought that was the funniest one because you lose the ability to speak.

You're just going,

well, they're going to get so angry.

Yeah,

and then you're just like, oh, God.

It sounds like he's being killed.

And it was just, you missed a bunch of shots in Hitman.

You were trying to shoot a guy in Hitman.

And honestly, if you heard that from the next room, you'd think someone's killing Simps.

Oh, God.

Oh, oh man oh hitman did you ever play hitman freelancer i don't remember i played the hitman games i don't remember the names they're all called something that's pretty much the same you know freelancer is kind of like uh it's like it's the one where you build up your base and shit yeah it's like yeah it is so good man it was so good i i played it a lot i i want to play it again actually it was really fun it's it's a bit like uh like roguelike you know like you you you have like a series of missions that you need to get to the end of in order to sort of pass like the sequence.

But sometimes you, it's like luck of the draw, you know, sometimes you'll get bad maps or whatever.

And it's fun though.

It's well done.

It's good.

There you go.

Yeah.

But frustrating as well at times.

Oh, apparently so.

Yeah, as evidence there, yeah.

Oh, man.

Another

great song, Flex.

How do you do it?

Oh, well, I came home a little pretty drunk and I just thought I'm bored.

So what time did you get home drunk?

Did you still play some Dota last night?

No, I didn't.

I got home at about 11.30 and I wasn't tired.

So I farted around and banned lab and made that.

Nice.

And then this morning I woke up and thought, I'll just check if that's actually

anything.

Otherwise,

I may have drunkenly made something that doesn't make any sense.

But it really made me laugh to hear.

Yeah, like that.

Parts of it just sound like it.

It sounds like you've looped parts of a gay porno in the back.

It's just so weird.

It sounds like dudes fucking in the back, but I'll try and find the actual video.

I'll get the time code for it.

And I don't know if we can put in the original, but it was, it's just like a 10, six seconds of you just absolutely losing your shit.

And it really made me laugh.

Nice.

And you sort of got your head in your hands.

Now, I think it's from the Sips, but he gets angrier, or is it Sips Rage Community?

There's a couple of those, yeah.

There's, I mean, there's been enough rage over the years for sure.

XCOM, Overwatch, Hitman.

God, I think there's even Minecraft rage in there.

That I've rage in just about everything.

Um, as you do, though, I mean, gaming rage,

it's something.

I don't know.

I don't know if you guys.

I love this.

Hold on, let me just get it.

This is this is the URL.

Look at your look at your face here.

Kill me.

Just fucking kill.

Oh, fuck.

Stop.

Oh, God.

I can't believe that.

Oh, fuck.

Just look how angry you are.

I'm like all red.

Citroy gets angrier as the video progresses.

Yeah.

I mean, I think, how long is the video?

Like 10 minutes long or something?

I think I've got like a, I've definitely got like a spectrum of anger.

So I linked the time code for this bit, and it's just, you miss these shots.

And it's

you miss like three headshots in a row yeah and then you just like you want to tear something apart you look so no no it's it is a different anger special this anger is the disbelief right it's like kind of frustration

it's not the same as like the anger where you smack your desk like that's the serious like

like

self-anger like there's definitely different kinds of like you could tell that this is you angry but also frustrated about like i don't know like like yeah like you can't quite i can't quite believe that this it's like bad luck anger right it's like it's not you can't even use words at this point it's yeah bad luck anger yeah yeah that's yeah let's say that bad it was bad luck the game is broken sometimes you know like some frames skipped or something i don't know or like yeah like some some

like uh but also you know you're streaming right in the back of your mind and sometimes i think Sometimes when you're streaming, your genuine anger does overwhelm you.

Like your genuine feelings and emotions do overwhelm you, and you stop realizing that you're live on the internet when you're getting angry.

Like, there is this sort of animal rage that can build up, you know, in you.

And sometimes, you know, where we would have these big shouting matches in Dota P-Flax, you know, sometimes that was like, it bubbles to the surface.

But I think usually there's some element of like just light awareness that like this is not worth angry, being angry about.

But sometimes it's the game, right?

Certain games make you throw your controller down, you know, or make you like go, like, fuck this game, you know, and like, or F4 emerge when there's something

you see.

Those guys, sometimes there are loads of rage, gamer rage compilations on YouTube.

Yeah.

And there's people who, like, it's not even that bad.

Like, they die in a game and it's like, yeah, that's annoying.

But they'll like...

smash up their keyboard.

They'll smash their headset.

Like, they're going absolutely fucking crazy.

Have you ever seen the guy who gets so mad that he like he puts his microphone in his mouth and like like chews on it really hard?

Just like just you know at that point.

Is this a fun hobby that you're enjoying?

I don't think it is.

I don't think you could call this something you do to relax and have fun.

Gaming is clearly just miserable.

Well, depends on the game.

Like I play plenty of games that are pretty chill.

Like, you know, I'm just building something or whatever.

It's not too frustrating.

But anytime I play competitive games, I'll get, you know, I'll have moments.

Sometimes I think for the most part, I'm, I'm all right.

And then every once in a while, it all just builds up and I'll just have like a big blowout, you know, I'll just

get really fucking.

Yeah.

It does tend to be like games where either you like, you know, you've lost or like you are, you're so close to winning and you're like, oh, I'm all I need is this to happen.

And then when it, and also, I think it's proportional to how long the time you've spent committed to it is, right?

Like if you're playing a game like Trump and Terror Town, where a round is five minutes, you can't be too invested in that.

Whereas, if you're playing like some of these async TI games I'm playing, which go on for six weeks, you feel so fucking invested in the stupid thing that if you make a small mistake, you're like, oh my God, I, you know, or something goes wrong.

You just feel like awful about it.

Because

even though it's completely artificial, right?

It doesn't matter.

And you're playing these games for fun or you're supposed to.

But I think like, I think that

it must just be the nature of the time commitment that we in our heads think the the time we've committed to this has to be worth an equivalent feeling back of reward for being successful in it or, you know, angry at making a mistake.

And sometimes you're angry at yourself.

I think it's worse.

It's mostly anger at yourself, really.

Yeah, I think it's worse to be angry at other people, though.

Like, or like,

you know, you can see that happening in the multiplayer game or when you blame someone on your team for going wrong or you blame yourself.

And I think there's a lot of frustration in those games, too.

I think also other people's anger like triggers each other, right?

Like people are infectiously angry with other people, you know, people, anger is this thing which is very translatable.

And people feel anger on behalf of other people or think someone's angry.

And so they're angry.

I'm furious.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Fox, I was going to say,

imagine you're playing Dota.

You're like, you're in your third game.

You've just lost two games.

Okay.

And you're like, okay, well, we'll do a win or whatever.

Or I don't know if you care about wins or losses or whatever, but your third game, but you're thinking, you know, this might be a good game or at least, you know, it could even be a win or whatever, but then you get like some techie smurf that just absolutely doesn't let anybody play the game or whatever, you know?

Like, it's like that.

It's like that moment.

You're just like, oh, fuck.

I do.

I hate it when we bump into smurfs.

Like, I think what's annoying to me is that.

Everybody thinks that the companies that make these games are so clever and they are very clever, but they also don't do things, none of them, that are so obvious that you think if i can tell this person's cheating or smurfing how how can you not develop a system that can pick up on that yeah like in in tarkov is a good example of that you look at some guys that are cheating their kda they've got like 66 kills per death average yeah so they'll go into multiple raids kill everything yeah and they're only very rarely do they die and you think is there really no system for picking up on that and flagging that account because i can tell instantly from look at their profile.

Oh, this guy's got 100 hours and like 1,000 kills.

This guy's cheating.

Or in Dota, you look and you look at someone who's, they last pit mid, last pick something like Ark Warden or Invoker, and they've got 80 wins.

You're like, okay, here we go.

The thing is, you need someone at the company who is, who is like a hobby policeman, though, right?

Like

when we went to Steam, do you remember there was a guy like on his lunch break randomly like searching for

people who were scamming or something?

Do you know what I mean?

Like, who worked for Steam?

And I think

that wasn't his job.

You know,

it's like, you know, and I think at these games companies,

you know, people have got very delineated jobs and they go in and they do a job.

And I think having a guy whose job it is to, you know, go through the stats and like build little algorithms to like track cheaters is like, it's just not something which is on their to-do list, even though it would improve the health of their game no end, right?

Quite frankly, so many of these games just are happy to, these game devs are just happy to abandon their game and move on with the next one you know as soon as they can true we we yes it totally makes sense for a the best game you know for something like marvel rivals right now they definitely need to have someone who's cracking down on that stuff but for 99 of games they're not gonna bother no i mean even

their even rivals like the thing is that they'll clamp down clamp down clamp down i don't think they ever will but the ways that they would have to clamp down is they would have to restrict um you know they'd have to take a phone number for somebody, uh, they'd have to do placements, they'd have to do this, they'd have to just give them lots of hurdles to make it so that they don't do it.

Because at the moment, there's nothing you all you need to do is just create an alt, it's a free game, so you create an alt account and away you go.

And, um, it's but there's, there's other things to it as well, you know, like a lot of YouTubers and streamers want to do, you know, oh, going from bronze to top 500 with this hero or whatever, you know, like a lot of people make content around it or whatever.

I think Overwatch 2 is finally finally looking at potentially clamping down on it.

But

I don't know.

I feel like, I mean, I've been playing enough rivals recently.

And yeah, I mean, it's annoying when there's a Smurf or whatever, but I'm just at the point now where it's just like, oh, well, it's just one of those games.

You know, like, just do what you can or try to learn something new or try a different hero or whatever.

And then...

on with the next one.

You know what I mean?

It's constantly an arms race too, right?

Like they banned, didn't they ban like SnapTap or whatever?

Yeah.

Like Counter-Strike?

What was it called like that those keyboards that had um like

macro whatever it was called

no it was basically so when you you could like it was basically like a keyboard thing that when you like went a d like so you were strafing back and forth between a and d it would like do it yeah instantly rather than um to do it like you know it's always the same with these games where you there's so many scripts and things like this it's it you it's it's hard to like keep track and obviously yeah anyone will do anything for a small advantage And, you know, like macro keyboards.

Oh, my God.

Like, auto-clickers.

Yeah.

Like,

I mean, it's it, but that I, I will say for a free game

and the amount I've played of rivals recently, there have, there, there's been cases where there's smurfs, and you could tell who they are.

You, you, you know, like, you go into a game and somebody's,

you know, gotten

an account rank 12, but they're like diamond.

You know what I mean?

Like, everybody starts at bronze three and has to work their way up, you know, bronze three, two, one, silver three, two, one, gold, three, two, one, plat, three, two, one, diamond, three, two, one.

And, but you can only start this at level 10.

So, like, you know, to basically win every single game you play to get to diamond, you can tell that it's, you know, it's just somebody's alt account.

They're good at the game or whatever.

But even then, like, we've had games where we've won against people like that.

But then you'll get games where somebody will just play something like Wolverine and just shit all over your whole team for the entirety of the game.

But at least the games are really quick.

You know, 10 minutes, you're done.

And then you just, you can move on to the next one.

That's it, yeah.

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You know what?

Here's a question.

This is a bit of a change of topic, but if you look at...

So in Civ6, the list of luxuries.

Yes.

Yes.

All right.

I want you to tell me if you consider all of these to be to be luxuries.

Civ6 list of luxuries.

I've got the list here.

List of resources in Civ 6.

Yeah, you got amber, cinnamon, citrus, cloves,

coke oak, coffee, cosmetics, cotton, dyes, diamonds, furs, gypsum.

I don't know what you use that for.

Honey,

it's used in, like, well, now it's used in like

plastering products and stuff.

You know, like dry wall and plaster.

That's all gypsum.

Incense, ivory, jade, jeans, marble, mercury, olives, pearls, perfume, perfume, salt, silk, silver, spices, sugar, tea, tobacco, toys, truffles, turtles, whales, and wine.

Now, that's a decent list.

Wine, whales, ivory, incense.

This stuff is all like,

you know, historically luxury or even modern day, like diamonds.

So, would you say that nowadays people would consider turtles and mercury and jade

and gypsum and dyes or clothes to be luxuries.

No, because I mean, but this is a game that spans multiple exactly.

My point six.

Thank you for setting me up.

My point is this.

How come we don't develop new luxuries don't appear throughout the ages?

Things that people didn't even know how to use and consider luxuries back then.

Suddenly, we figured out video games.

That's a luxury.

And loads of people buy that because that's a huge industry.

Maybe as you get into like future

tech and civ they can have like uh you like your like pornhub subscription.

exactly

yeah so i'm thinking what could be some modern day luxuries yeah i mean greg's you could build a commercial space travel could be like a luxury like staying in a hotel yeah like space tourism staying in a nice hotel going to ibiza um because i think that that would be interesting as a sort of if you're going through the eras like you are in civ 7 yeah where you've got like the ancient era the things that were luxuries for the romans and the greeks and the egyptians are not the things that are still luxuries today.

Although these are a lot of many of these things are things we still eat.

You wouldn't say some of them are.

They have dyes for their clothes.

Everybody has dyes for their clothes.

It's not even a concern anymore.

You wouldn't consider it a luxury that your clothes had some color to them.

Everything you are wearing has some kind of dye in it.

Back then, we're talking about clothing that was the same color as whatever it was made of.

Yeah, it was just like everything just was like burlap back then, wasn't it?

It was just like burlap or just made for burlap.

If you had something that was a different color, you were just like, whoa, this guy's luxurious.

He's got a blue t-shirt.

Sexy man.

I think, well, it depends.

When it comes to food, one person's luxury is another person's requirement.

You know, having sugar in your tea or having, you know, I don't know, tuna, tuna sandwiches, or I don't know, whatever it is.

You know, these days, probably lobsters, crabs are still inverted, a luxury.

I would say so.

Crabs not on the list for civs.

Caveat.

I guess because, of course, crabs are people and clams are people.

So crabs are a basic resource.

The kind of people is a luxury.

You got cosmetics here.

Coffee, I mean, historically, coffee, anything that needed to be imported from a different land back in the day was considered a luxury, right?

So like spices.

cocoa, all that kind of stuff.

But now, obviously, with, you know, globalization, industrialization, these things are not really considered luxuries anymore.

Indeed.

I don't don't know about gypsum.

Gypsum goes in a category of its own, I think.

Yeah.

Look at it.

Civ 6 is making me

making meat.

But I just don't think it's a rare commodity.

It's a fertilizer.

And the main constituent of plaster drywall.

Yeah.

And chalk.

It also crystallizes as translucent crystals of selenite or selenite.

There you go.

What's selenite used for?

No idea.

It is.

They don't know.

Whales are still kind of considered.

Okay, let me use it.

They use whales for like cosmetics and stuff, don't they?

So on Civ 7, one of the things they've done is they always do this in Civ games, and I kind of like it.

They try and include unusual Civs and unusual leaders, right?

Who haven't kind of been in the games before or haven't been highlighted before.

And to be honest, I find it difficult because I don't know who these people are.

Now, some of them are fairly recognizable, like, I know, Napoleon.

Right.

Although I'm not sure Napoleon should be one of them, to be honest, because he was a pretty awful man

who led Europe into, he was Hitler before Hitler, basically.

Yeah, he wasn't a great guy.

If it wasn't for Hitler, we'd probably talk about.

Exactly.

And I think Tiff Sev would have forgotten it.

And then you've got people, you know, like

I don't know, like Harriet Tubman, who is an American black civil rights lady.

I don't really know her history,

but she is an interesting person to be in charge of.

I don't know, someone, you know, like a colonial power who would have done a lot of slavery back in that era.

It's all very strange.

You know, here's the case one.

When it comes to Napoleon, and I think I might have said this before, I find it encrooyable that the French have the Arc de Triomphe, right?

And they have that in the middle of fucking Paris.

It's like you can't miss it.

It's the biggest, most chaotic roundabout in the world.

John Wick had a big fight there in the most recent John Wick film.

That honors the dead from the Napoleonic Wars.

They're honored on there.

That was essentially a war of conquest.

That wasn't France defending itself.

That was Napoleon saying, I'm going to have everything.

I'm going to control the whole of fucking Europe.

They still have this thing.

It would be like if in Germany you had a big fucking thing right in the middle of Berlin honoring all the generals of World War II and called it the

Arc of Triumph or whatever you would call it in German.

How come the French get away with this?

Why do they get a free pass on having the fucking Arc de Triomphe?

Everybody's like, oh, the Arc de Triomphe, fantastic.

There's got to be more to it.

There's got to be more to it than that.

In addition,

it's called the Arch of Triumph.

Yeah.

And it has the French Revolutionary soldiers who fought and died and the Napoleonic guys who fought and died.

And World War I.

It's got the unknown soldier buried under it.

But it's got, I mean, but they, you know, it's hard to get it.

So it's multi-purpose, then, is what you're saying.

But it's still celebrating the Napoleonic, the soldiers who fought and died in the Napoleonic Wars.

That's pretty remarkable.

I know.

Well, I mean, I guess, you know, I guess they were people that need, need to have some sort of commemoration.

I know it's not ideal, but let's throw it in the canal, like that statue of

it.

How about if they called it the

Ark of Some of its Triumphant, like the French Arch of Shame?

Fair enough.

But part of it, every day.

Parisians have to go there and slap themselves for shame.

Oh, just saying how soon we forget.

We're just saying, oh, yeah.

the other

people so napoleon's got two two and then you've got lafayette as well who's uh the french you

know who lafayette is i'm looking him up lafayette

exactly you have to look him up that's exactly what i'm talking about right here he goes he's Gilbert du Mautier Marquis de Lafayette so he's a French nobleman who was who was part of the

he joined the Continental Army led by George Washington in the American Revolutionary War he was also permitted to command continental army Army troops.

Remarkable man.

And he was a key figure in the French Revolution of 1789.

Congrats.

So, so, so, interesting.

So, if again, two Napoleons, a Lafayette, um, the they've got Harris Tubman, they've got Confucius, obviously, heard of him, but then they've got Charlemagne, another French person, uh, the father of Europe.

I'm not saying that this is favorite in the French, but that's for a rapper called Charlemagne as well.

Charlemagne, you don't want to get confused.

And then you've got, okay, so do you know who Jose Rizal is?

No, I have to look it up.

Jose Rizal.

No.

Obviously, probably a very important person in world history, but he's

a Filipino nationalist.

Okay.

Okay.

So.

Who's Trung Truck?

She is

the, I don't know.

I think Vietnamese petette of twins who were a military leader, maybe, or maybe not even a twins.

I can't remember.

How do you know all this?

He's left too.

Oh, you're looking it up as we're saying.

There's a bunch of people who are, and I get it, right?

But it's like kind of weird.

They've picked Friedrich the second, I think, as the German one.

He has two characters.

Benjamin Franklin is the first American.

You can play as him.

And then you could play as Amina, who I've never heard of.

Ashoka, who I've never heard of.

You know, it's like...

And yet, not a single English person is in the world.

So they have said this.

The British DLC is going to be with Ada Lovelace.

British DLC.

It seems crazy that there'd be a British DLC when

Great Britain was such a huge player early on in world history.

Like it doesn't make sense to just not have a trace of that.

I mean, if we're going in terms of ancient era, fine.

Like, you know, we didn't do shit.

Like, we were just a...

We got invaded by the Romans, got invaded by the Normans.

Fair enough.

But certainly much of the second half of

the last 2,000 years, a lot of that, Britain has certainly been a big part of that, especially in colonial era.

Yeah, World War II and all that.

I don't understand.

They were the superpower back in the day.

Yeah.

And I'm not asking for it.

I'm just, I'm just, I just feel like it's always a bit strange to go through.

And also, I think the whole thing is a little bit, there's a lot of these,

a lot of civilizations I've never heard of as well, somehow.

The Bugandans, who I believe is maybe that means Ugandan, but it's just they dropped the U in a rebrand.

Uh, the Chola, uh, you know, the various, there's loads of these strange sort of

Bantu kingdom within Uganda.

The kingdom of the Baganda people is the largest of the traditional kingdoms in present-day East Africa, consisting of Uganda's central region, including the Ugandan capital of Kampala.

The 14 million Baganda, singular Muganda, often referred to simply by the root word and adjective ganda, make up the largest Ugana region.

But I don't know.

I wouldn't say that did they do much?

Genuine question.

I don't know.

Were they like a huge deal back then?

I'm not.

Maybe I need to swap on my education.

Also, the Mau, Maorians?

I've never heard of those.

Are they Maori?

No, that's different to the Maori and different to the Maya and different to the Majapahit who are also in this.

Interesting.

You know what?

You know what?

Also, one thing I'll say is that they will often have

something like Native Americans, for example, right?

Or what do they call them?

First Nation peoples or whatever the term you want to use is.

And I think if we're talking about the effect that like a civilization had on world history, which is what I always thought civilization was about, was picking the leaders and nations that had a massive impact on the people we are today.

I don't think that you could say, like when I was playing Civ 6 the other day, that the Cree nation really had a massive impact on world history.

Like, I know that that may seem unfair.

But back then, they really didn't, did they?

Back then, a lot of these civilizations were confined.

Like, there was no global scale for anything unless you were like a big empire, right?

So, all of these little, like little minor nations or civilizations and stuff are always just going to have like more of a, like a local impact.

Like a

lot of people.

Which is interesting, but I just don't know if Civ can cover it.

A game like like EU4 with mods would probably be able to cover it a lot better.

I just feel like if we're comparing ancient

cultures,

I think Egypt, Greece, the Persians,

certainly

Mali, those are

certainly civilizations that could have got or did create big empires.

Or like the Incans, the Mayans.

But then you have the Cree,

and I just think, I don't know if they did enough to really justify being one of the main.

In what's now the US,

they were probably pretty big.

Right, but then in relation to what was around at the time, it's not, you know, we look at...

But so you have them in the ancient era and they will, you know, that's cool.

And then in the second era, which I presume is like sort of the Middle Ages.

Yeah, which they should still be doing the same stuff.

Yeah.

And then in the modern era, what do we replace them with America?

Well, yeah.

Because that's not really fair, is it?

No, but I mean, historically, that's what happens.

I mean, you like the colonization of,

you know, the new world occurs, and then they slowly decline, decline, decline.

And then,

yeah.

And then it's

essentially in the third era, they should just be completely fucked over by Europeans, is what I'm saying.

You get to change.

You replace them and

your entire

civilization shrinks and you get to live on a reservation with a casino.

Yes.

That is the third era for the native tribes of America.

Because to ignore that is to just whitewash history well well i think that they're that the thing is there's room for every they're all of this right they're trying to give you a sandbox to create your own i i i think they i i agree though in a sense like i feel like the some in some cases they have

it they've been selective over again it's a game right that they want to they want to milk down the road and i feel like the process of this game is to take deliberately take out parts of history to sell them back to us later um i really just feel like the base game should have had the base stuff in it like the core

yeah but people aren't gonna aren't gonna pay money for the bugandans because they don't know who they are so you can those ones first

you need a bundle pack

you need a bundle the bugand bundle the bugandon bundle yeah well no but that's how they do it though that's how they get you Yeah, of course.

Let me tell you, this is a complete change of subject again.

This is, have you guys ever heard of Chang and Eng Bunker?

No.

Chang and English.

They were the original Siamese twins.

And I'm saying that honestly because they were from Siam.

They were Siamese, which is now Thai.

Now we call them conjoint twins.

Okay.

But the reason everybody calls them Siamese twins is because of these two guys who were very famous conjoint twins.

And they were sort of taken around the world in the 19th century.

Everybody studied them.

They were, you know, considered absolutely fascinating.

They went to America.

They were in freak shows.

Then they went independent and just traveled around themselves, just as Chang and Eng Bunker, chatting with people and, you know, showing themselves off and holding like because people had nothing to do about that.

There was no fucking movie.

So you'd just go and see Chang and Ng Bunker and chat to them.

That was an evening, right?

Now, get this.

They married.

Chang and Ng Bunker married.

They married two sisters, one each, obviously.

These guys are conjoined at the sternum.

So they're basically almost always facing each other a little bit.

They're sort of turned towards each other.

Their hips are almost touching.

They had 21 children between them.

Wow.

Chang had 10.

Eng had 11.

And apparently they both fancied one sister more than the other, but they obviously did some kind of deal.

And

one of them got one sister and one got the other.

How are they, what's the logistics here?

Because

no, no, no.

You're joined at the sternum.

You've got to have sex because you're making a lot of babies here.

And do they just line up?

Do you get the two sisters to lie next to each other?

And you just both go at it at the same time.

And there must be some kind of synchronization because, of course, you're joined at the sternum so you can't have one guy pumping while the other guy's withdrawing you'd have to pump in sync it's just one

it's just one of life's mysteries you know it's not i want to know simps i want to know how did they do it

literally it's forbidden knowledge you don't need to know flex why do you need to know that fascinating because they had so many children yeah their ancestors still meet up now and if you look there's this uh because they settled in america right um i think alabama maybe no yeah north North Carolina.

So they lived in the South.

Their children and their descendants and all the rest of it are still, you know, still going.

So they have these big family meetups, the bunker offspring.

I think that's fantastic.

But I just staggered.

You're not sure how they pulled it off.

Yes, I'm just saying this is a great story, but I have questions.

And my curiosity extends to how the fuck did they do it?

And of course, they both died at the same time, which is very sad.

But I mean, did they argue?

Did they fight?

One guy's got the left hand.

You would have

argued and fought all the time.

Yeah, I guess they were.

And you just never get a break from each other either.

You just constantly, you don't get one minute, you know?

Oh, actually, they do have separate arms.

So they're like complete bodies.

I thought they might be sharing an arm and a leg like Ogre Megai and Doa, but no.

They've literally got arms, but their arm is permanently behind another person.

God, how awkward.

I guess if it's all you'd ever known, you'd be fine.

Yeah, I suppose.

Yeah.

Did they have two toilets next to each other?

How long did they go?

How old were they when they died?

67.

They made 60.

67.

Yeah, it's not bad.

Sorry, 62, 62.

That's good, though.

I mean,

because that's quite like a like a defect, you know, like usually, usually something like that.

People can live, but they just don't tend to live very long, you know?

Like, indeed.

Yeah, well, according to Wikipedia, with modern

technology, they could have easily been separated.

But at the time, I think it would have probably killed them.

I think they had basically a they would they were joined by like at sternum and their livers were shared.

That was the only

shared liver.

That's the issue.

And so when you're one of them died, I think it wasn't was not long before the other one.

Yeah.

It'd be awkward if it'd be awkward in that case if one of them died, but the other one lived on for like quite some time.

No, that wouldn't be terrible.

And you're just sort of looking around.

That would be fucking awful.

Yeah.

I don't think it could happen, though, because they are sharing.

But one of them,

one of them did have a stroke and became partially paralyzed

and then became a heavy drinker.

And so it was a lot.

So if you're a heavy drinker,

that must mean that your conjoined twin is feeling the effects, right?

Like you'd have to.

Yeah.

I guess so.

It's crazy to me.

So

they each have a brain, but

each of their brains is controlling, in some cases, the same like body parts.

Like, how do the signals differentiate themselves?

You know, like they're just on a different frequency or something.

No, no, no.

So I think they literally, they're joined at the sternum.

Somehow they share a liver.

I'm not sure the mechanisms.

You can look it up, I'm sure.

But all their, the signals from their brain go down their spine.

They don't have a fused spine.

Oh, right.

So you're literally two completely independent bodies joined at this one location right in the middle of their sternum and they share a liver somehow.

I don't know whether there's like, I mean, I have no idea how that works, but essentially they did share a liver.

But yeah, that's crazy.

So I think you could, you could eat and drink one of them, and the other one wouldn't benefit the way like a baby would.

No, yeah.

But then their bloodstream must have met in some ways.

Well, they wouldn't have to have to.

They'd have to, right?

Interesting.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's crazy.

But if one of them was a heavy drinker and the other one was not, that implies that somehow they didn't have to share each other.

One of them is like a fitness fanatic and the other one isn't.

The other one is just a big couch potato.

Yeah.

I don't know.

I mean, you know, you'd be sitting there looking.

Your twin is sort of facing the other way.

You're watching TV or something.

You're just like, fuck, I feel so drunk.

What's happening?

Are you drinking again?

He's like, no, from a big bottle of whiskey.

No, I'm not, you fucking idiot.

Kill you.

Stop drinking.

I'm going to drive us home.

Oh, man.

Yeah.

What a life that would be.

I mean,

I guess, like you said, you must just be used to it.

You have no choice.

You just have to.

It's all you've ever known.

But yeah, it must be so

crazy.

Just must be crazy.

Just wake up every day and just think, Jesus Christ.

Him again.

Yeah, not this guy again.

He's been drinking again, too.

Stinks.

Yeah, really interesting.

But yeah, Chang and Eng Bung Chang.

Chang and Engung.

Yeah, it's a big, you can look it all up.

It's a big Wikipedia.

There's loads of articles and stories about it and stuff.

Just fascinating.

And especially for them to live in an era where I think luckily they were treated quite nicely look like you know people were genuinely fascinated um well as much as the the freak show era of the time gave them i mean it's it's tricky right to to judge these people and how they were treated i mean look i i agree

but they did also then go solo so it was like they were in a band it's like michael jackson broke away from the jackson five and just did michael jackson they were honestly just good on them for having so many kids were they trying to make new siamese twins or something what was going on were they thinking that they'd be able to create some?

I mean, 21, that is a lot.

I mean, there's no contraception, and they were obviously apparently a couple of absolute shaggers.

So, you know, they just uh ended up babies.

So, uh, Blues News today, we've got

Luis Moncada.

This is an actor from Breaking Bad.

He's one of the hitmen.

Do you know one of the twins?

One of the twins, yeah,

yeah, yeah.

I see him.

Uh, he is, um, his stream is on Twitch now.

I've okay, he's he's started streaming on Twitch.

You can check him out.

He basically looks the same.

He's playing like Scum and various other games where he basically is a tattooed gangster in-game going around shooting people

with his mates.

That's all.

That's all I got.

He's doing it.

He's playing games that are quite appropriate, though, for his persona, which is fun.

He's playing like GTA.

When's he going to transition into Minecraft or Hello Kitty Island Adventure content?

His name is Luis Moncada.

Checking out.

I'm looking at one of his featured clips from last month.

It's called

Splish Splash Poop.

Splish splash poop.

Splish splash poop.

Yeah.

Yeah, there he plays.

He plays some funky games.

Look at these games.

Wow.

This is nuts.

He's like made his little...

He is playing scum.

That's crazy.

What a game to choose.

He's playing scum.

Dude, he streamed for six and a half hours.

What a beast.

Jesus.

Is this man?

Well, I normally stream for nine.

So

you stream for nine a day.

Sometimes, yeah.

There is a immersive Minecraft experience happening in London.

If you want to take

your kids.

Yeah, it's Crossrail 2.

You've got to get down there and dig.

Minecraft in real life is coming to Canada Water, which I think is

Canada Warfare.

Yeah.

£20 for children and you can walk around a Minecraft world with your kids.

20 quid buckle.

I know.

It's guided by two unique characters, Tobin and Deo, and you will learn to use the orb of interaction, a glowing, interactive, handheld device that guides you between rooms.

This sounds like a task from the apprentice that they have to

set up an interactive, you know, alternate universe, whatever, or something.

I hope it's not going to be like that Willy Wonka explains.

That's what I'm saying.

It sounds to me more like one of these people turn up like people furious after paying families, paid £20 for Minecraft disaster.

Yeah.

Something like that.

In cult news, Jared Leto,

he's the lead singer, I think, of 30 Seconds to Mars, I think, as one of his side projects.

He has just been taking a whole load of pictures with a load of

fans who have all dressed up in white and take a load of pictures on this island.

It is bizarre.

Apparently, he held a contest

and the attendees, who are primarily young women, offer, and he, in this contest, he offered the winner a chance to spend the night with him.

Oh, hell yeah.

Well, like, essentially.

He is certainly resembling.

Yeah, I think so.

Maybe

he is certainly resembling a charismatic cult leader, and it's bizarre.

There's a couple, one of these pictures is great, though.

If you look at at the second picture, P-Flacks, yeah, the guy with the Marvel t-shirt, there's a guy on the left with a Marvel.

I think they were all told to wear white for the day.

He was like, oh, I'll break out the old Marvel t-shirt.

And this is the only shirt that this guy could find that was white.

He also is one of the only guys there.

And he sat on like this sort of camping chair that he looks like he's brought with him.

All right,

can I just

Jared Leto is 53?

Right.

Right.

I had no idea he was older than me.

I thought he was younger.

He is 53.

I can't believe that.

The guy looks amazing.

I think he must be on a lot of young people's blood, this guy.

I'll be honest with you.

I think he's shit.

I think he's an absolutely shit actor and he makes wank movies.

I'm trying to think of a good...

He was all right in Blade Runner, but his character was meant to be a weirdo.

Yeah, he's terrible.

I think he, yeah,

he has embraced the weird.

And I think he is weird.

He's a cult.

Now he's a weird cult leader or something.

But he's kind of done it ironically.

Because this post, he's kind of almost joking that it's a cult.

I don't know what's going on, but

there's some interesting pictures out there now.

And

the pictures look great, but it is creepy.

Biohackers.

Okay.

What's that?

What's that?

Biohackers.

Biological biologists, I guess.

This is why Putin poops in a briefcase.

He doesn't want to get biohacked.

Right.

I think it was because he hated the guy that was on charge of clearing out the suitcase.

You get Sergey, Sergei.

I lay a big, fresh one in suitcase for you.

Clean it up.

Long coiling snakes, Sergey.

Big, stinky snake, Sergey.

Oh, Sergei, I had big breakfast this morning.

Big poop coming.

Big, very, very, very, big poop coming.

Get your suitcase ready, Sergei.

You were clean.

Oh, stomach is germining, Sergey.

Stomach is

like bats in my stomach.

It will be messy one, Sergeant.

I assure you.

This is way less funnier than your thing, so we're not going to do that.

Sorry.

No, I want to hear it.

I'm sorry.

Did you see there was like a chance that didn't...

Sometimes the astronomers per warning out that there's going to be like an asteroid.

Yeah, we talked about this

previously, the 1% thing.

Do you know what?

I read about it, and it's only like 30 to 40 meters

wide.

And I mean,

it would be like a nuke

hitting

basically.

It would be enormous.

It would level us into it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, I mean,

that's not.

It could be worse, is what I'm trying to say.

It could be a lot worse.

Did we talk about this last week when it turned out that the astronomers had put out a warning and it was actually just Elon Musk's car or whatever?

Yeah.

On alternate space.

They'd rediscovered it.

And they were like, they were like, we found this object which is going to impact Earth.

And it turned out it was just the car

floating up there.

Very stupid.

But then there is an there's routinely asteroids that could potentially hit Earth.

The Monus one has a 1.

1.5%.

They upgraded it to 1.5.

About one in 67, they're saying.

Something like that.

Yeah.

And, you know, it's so that means it's a 98% chance.

to miss

so don't worry i mean also there's a very good chance

has taught me anything,

prepare yourselves.

Yeah.

I mean, I will say if it lands in the ocean, it's going to be quite the tsunami.

So

it's quite scary.

Yeah.

So 20, set your calendars for 2032.

2032.

December 22nd, 2032 is when it will strike Earth.

Merry Christmas.

So, you know, make the most of

this Chris.

This Christmas.

Well, it's got, there's been a, there's been loads of near misses in the past.

not if you look back in uh in history there's been loads and loads and loads of them and there's there's loads that they're constantly monitoring as well and they say the big thing is

is when they when they uh detect one

they assign it like a probability but normally that changes because they have um different agencies analyze the data and and and they they they come to an agreement and normally that percentage uh lowers like as a result do you think they adjust the the,

because obviously they look at it and they can track where it's moving and how fast it's going and stuff.

But are they saying, well, like when they predict it, is it because it might get bumped by something else or they're not sure how the gravity will affect it?

I'm amazed we don't have a computer model that can perfectly predict based on its trajectory.

And, you know, I mean, we can plan missions to distant planets and time it just right so that the satellite hits this point of the orbit and then gets, you know, sped up to go at this angle to hit this other planet years down down the line.

Can we really not look at these rocks and go, that's where it is, that's where it's going, this is how fast it's going there?

Just run it.

And it just goes boop and shows it missing or hitting?

Is it that difficult?

I mean, I think

it's very small.

Yeah,

they can model it.

They definitely can model it.

And it's a long way away.

Like, that's the thing.

It's so, it's, they can, they know it's there, but it's like getting precision is difficult because of its right, but like I'm saying, they do this with other things where they'll like plan trajectories for for like voyager and shit like that stuff like unforeseen things can happen along the way because it is

it is it is it their concern that we don't know what else is out there that might have a very slight gravitational because if something's like not really though I think it's just that you're seeing this thing on a telescope and it's a dot and it's a dot that's moving towards you right and it's like how fucking fast is that dot going and how exactly is it moving towards me i think over time we can get more data but like it's

very hard to

see.

We can see the proto-galaxies from near the birth of the universe.

Well, yeah, but these

it's only 130 feet, right?

That's like but it's really close.

It's in our solar system.

It's not that far away.

It's millions of miles away.

Yeah, but we can look at the surface of other planets and shit.

that are outside our solar system.

Do you think that we can do all this stuff and point Jimmy?

So my local council can't pick

Exactly.

I'm sure we've got the technology to do it.

Right.

Yeah, that's all.

Right,

explain to P Flex.

Why can't we do this yet?

What's the problem?

All right.

Next article.

I'm going to post this one in the chat so you can read it, P Flex, because I feel like it's.

You can just read it.

Excellent.

Woman 25 faces jail after bombarding her boyfriend's ex with videos of her farting.

Shop worker Rhiannon Evans, 25, of Mountain Street in Kernaf in Gwynedeth, pleaded guilty to pursuing a course of conduct amounting to harassment.

Prosecutors told magistrates in the town Howard Evans' first inappropriate video.

She proceeds to pass gas by placing the camera on her bottom and passing the gas.

Wait, so she's

sending

videos of herself

farting to her boyfriend's boyfriend's ex.

That's odd.

That's me.

I think that's fucking hilarious.

The boyfriend's ex has she just moved on and she's just receiving these you know she's just trying to live her life and every day she just gets a new fart vid sent to her some sometimes

just send one back she's already got the she's already got the guy right why do you she need to gloat with the fart selfies because she's second people are up because this other girl got there

she's second

she's resentful oh my god she's like um she's like at the andrew tate of women yeah

i don't understand

something like that All right, next.

There you go.

You can have a read of this one as well.

There's two good ones today.

New Zealand's mountain is now legally a person.

A mountain in New Zealand is now legally recognized as a person after being granted all the rights and responsibilities of a human by the government.

The new law offers extra protection for Mount Taranaki, now known as Mr.

Mount Taranaki.

No, it's not known as Taranaki Maunga.

It's more Maranaka.

We'll now hear evidence against Mr.

Mount Taranaki.

Did you, on the 5th of November cause an avalanche

which subsequently murdered three skiers leisurely skiing?

My client will take the fist on that one.

No comment.

My client is

during a volcanic eruption pass gas that has caused inappropriate

yes.

Hello, Tina.

I'm outside the courtroom here today where we've been hearing the court case against Taranaki Maunga, or Mr.

Taranaki Maunga, as he's now known.

He has remained stoic and silent in

the witness box, undergoing cross-examination by the prosecution's lawyers.

And yeah, so far, a very tight-lipped trial here, and very little to report from Mr.

Mount Taranaki.

The evidence submitted today shows that Mr.

Mount Taranaki has not ever paid Social Security, even once

in the thousands and millions of years that he's been alive.

It's crazy.

Why have they done this?

There's nothing better to do, I guess.

I guess because if you do that, then he's protected.

The mountain is protected the same way a human being would be.

So someone can't fuck with some future government that wants to repeal environmental laws or whatever can't fuck with the mountain because it's technically a person.

So they'd have to

an immortal one at that.

I think it's, according to the article, I think it's an agreement between the government and the indigenous Maori who have long considered the mountain to be one of their ancestors but i think it is true that we've had this recognition of companies as people and things like this

and corporate entities as people in order to get around certain yeah um rules um but but i think that in this case it seems like a a cool cool idea as a way to protect nature um and and you know ensure that people you know behave themselves around it you know

got to ask for permission before kissing that mountain or whatever.

Maybe we should do the same with the Blarney Stone, you know, because that's the sexual misconduct that goes on with that thing every day.

Terrible, you know.

Who's asking the Blarney Stone whether it wants to be kissed by fucking hundreds of people a day?

That's true, yeah.

No one.

It's not.

What if it could talk?

Please kill me.

I don't want to be kissed by another American woman.

Oh my God.

We should get like, we should get we should get these two together.

They should be in a like a we should get dating app for.

Well, Barney Stone and Mount Taranaki.

Get them together, yeah.

Well, it's a bit of a size difference there, isn't it?

But

you could get

what those big faces called.

The Mount Rushmore.

Get them.

Get them together.

Mount Taranaki.

Mount Taranaki gets some cosmetic surgery.

He just gets a face.

Wait, does that mean that the guys on Mount Rushmore, if we made them a person, they're like a five-man conjoined twin?

Oh, shit.

You could revive them with

the purple goo from Ghostbusters 2.

Just play some really lively music and then just get all the

Rushmore thing going.

That'd be great.

You need like a

five-man group of another natural monument, like the fingers or something.

So five fingers.

Just put them on top of the Arctic Triomph, and then they could be like gumby legs with the Arctic Triomph.

There you go.

Wait, the Easter Island statues.

They've got faces.

Oh, yeah.

Let's get these get these dates going.

Get a Sphinx in there as well.

Oh, my God.

People love cat people, don't they?

Yeah.

Yeah, they're like cats.

They look like a mix of sort of like a cat.

It's a mythical creature with the head of a human, the body of a lion and the wings of an eagle.

It doesn't sound like a cat to me.

Well, that's a type of body the whole body's a cat the body's a lion that's not a cat that type of cat it's a big cat it's a big cat it's a it's a big cat yeah but then are we ignoring the head of a human here what about the head of a human

that's a person the body of a horse

torso and the head and arms of a man or woman right but you wouldn't call it a horse no i suppose not

like come and ride my horse and someone wheels a fucking centaur out you'd be like whoa

i didn't agree to this and what if you were like what if if you were enslaving the centaur, though, and degrading it as well, you would call it a gazebo.

You can't enslave the centaurs, they're too proud a race.

They would fight to the last.

Right.

On the fields of Shamzoth,

the centaur tribe rides forth.

We shall face the enslavers in battle with our allies, the Sphinx.

Yeah.

They're sort of like cats, but not.

And the faces of Mount Rushmore.

But then the enslavers are just up there on like their imperial,

spaceship in orbit.

And they're like, get those fucking horses into the mines.

Exactly.

Get those fucking horses down there.

I don't care if their hooves can't mine the coal.

Get them in the fucking mines.

They can just tap it really hard.

Oh, man.

Some deep lore has been invented today.

Oh, I guess that'll do.

That's one podcast.

We've covered it all.

One podcast.

Ready to send off.

We're ready to ship it.

Yeah.

Let's ship it.

Ship it.

Clip it.

Ship it.

Ship it and rip it out.

All right.

Thank you everyone so much.

See you next time.

See you.

Bye.

Goodbye.