WWDTM: Lewis Black

Speaker 1 This message comes from NPR sponsor Patagonia. As environmental progress stalls, Patagonia believes it's on businesses to step up.

Speaker 1 The company knows it isn't perfect, but it's proving businesses can make a profit without bankrupting the planet. Explore more at patagonia.com slash impact.

Speaker 3 From NPR and WBEC Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR news quiz.

Speaker 3 Sink your teeth into me, North Carolina. I'm your hot and saucy Bill Biquew.

Speaker 3 I'm Bill Curtis, and here is your host at Deepak in Durham, North Carolina, Peter Sagal.

Speaker 1 Thank you, Bill.

Speaker 7 Thank you, everybody.

Speaker 6 Thank you all so much.

Speaker 1 We are delighted to be back in Durham, a place known for polite and kind southern gentlemen, just like the Jason Isaacs character in the White Lotus.

Speaker 1 Later on, we're going to be talking to the comedian Louis Black, famous for his back-in-black rants on The Daily Show and for playing anger itself in Inside Out, and also a proud graduate of the University of North Carolina.

Speaker 6 I know

Speaker 1 That's a little surprising, but that's why he sometimes shouts at people in a drawl.

Speaker 1 We want to hear your delightful delightful regional accent. Give us a call to play our games.
The number is 1888-924-8924. That's 1888.
Wait, wait, now let's welcome our first listener contestant.

Speaker 1 How are you running wait, wait, don't tell me.

Speaker 8 Hey, Peter, this is Tim calling from Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, right outside of the greatest city in the world, Philadelphia.

Speaker 6 Okay,

Speaker 1 I'm glad you clarified because I wasn't quite sure what you were going to say. Philadelphia.
Swarthmore, I know, famous for its college. What do you do there?

Speaker 8 Correct. I actually don't work at Swathmore, but I work in higher ed communications at another local university.

Speaker 1 Oh, really? So you live in Swarthmore where Swarthmore College is, but you're like to hell with you when you work for somebody else.

Speaker 5 You got that right.

Speaker 1 You know, sometimes you just got to get away. Yeah, I understand.
Rebel, why don't you? Yeah. Well, welcome to the show, Tim.
Let me introduce you to our panel this week.

Speaker 1 First, he's a comedian you can see at the Wall Comedy Club in Bakersfield, California on May 3rd. It's Alonzo Bowden.

Speaker 9 Hello, sir.

Speaker 4 Hello, Alonzo. How are you? I'm good.
How are you doing?

Speaker 1 Next, he's a comedian and the host of the 5 o'clock Somewhere News on Instagram, and he'll be opening for WCamow Bell at Chicago's Den Theater on April 26th.

Speaker 5 It's Adam Burke. Hello.

Speaker 6 Hi.

Speaker 1 Adam, good to talk to you.

Speaker 1 And she is a comedian you can see on tour in Honolulu, April 25th, Nashville, May 2nd, and St. Louis on May 3rd.
It's Dolce Sloan.

Speaker 1 Hello, Dulce. It's the me!

Speaker 1 Tim, welcome to the show. You, of course, are going to play who's Bill this time.
Bill, as he always does, is going to read you three quotations from this week's news.

Speaker 1 If you can correctly identify or explain two of them, you will win our prize, any voice from our show you might choose, in your voicemail. You ready to go?

Speaker 1 Let's do it. Let's.
Your first quote is about a university's response to threatened funding cuts.

Speaker 3 It's like Goliath versus Goliath.

Speaker 1 That was a comment in the New York Times article about what university, that to many people's surprise, is standing up to the government.

Speaker 6 Harvard. Harvard, yes.

Speaker 1 The Trump administration is trying to yank $2 billion in funding from Harvard after that university refused to cave to their demands.

Speaker 1 Harvard's stance does seem brave, but like all Harvard students, if they lose their funding, their dads can take care of it.

Speaker 1 Were you guys surprised to see Harvard taking this stance?

Speaker 9 I don't know if I was surprised considering $2 billion to Harvard is like, what, $20?

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 9 You know, like, yeah, we'll go through the couches, we'll get the spare change, we'll cover the two billion.

Speaker 1 Now, Harvard, of course, they had the advantage of having an example of what happens if you do CAVE, which is what Columbia University did recently. Now, Columbia, I know, but they're paying for it.

Speaker 1 Now they are required to devote most of their research to studying if the water is making us gay.

Speaker 6 And, and, well, we'll find out.

Speaker 1 Research takes time. I have to say, personally,

Speaker 1 it is so exciting to see people finally rooting for Harvard. This is a change.

Speaker 1 I actually wore my Harvard t-shirt out in public the other day, and instead of people shouting, hey, jackass, they yelled, way to go, jackass.

Speaker 6 Wow.

Speaker 10 I can't believe you figured out a way to work out

Speaker 10 to include that you went to Harvard into that sentence. Well, that was so deft.

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, I've been doing that for years, but now for the first time ever, I may not get mocked for it. So how could I resist?

Speaker 7 All right, here is your next quote.

Speaker 3 We're going to put the ass in astronauts.

Speaker 1 That was pop star Katie Perry

Speaker 1 talking about her trip where this week with a crew of other women.

Speaker 8 Into space.

Speaker 1 Into space, yes. Jeff Bezos' rocket company, Blue Origin, launched the first ever all-female crew into space this week, including Perry and Bezos' fiancé, Lauren Sanchez.

Speaker 1 It was an inspiring moment for women, including little girls everywhere, who now know that you can do anything if you have a rich boyfriend.

Speaker 12 Which is what I've been trying to teach these girls.

Speaker 1 People are criticizing, you know, this 11-minute flight up and back for being like just a dumb PR stunt, but it is a step forward for women in space. Think about it.

Speaker 1 The last time a woman went to space, they left her there for 11 months.

Speaker 9 I have to say, Peter, as a comic, when we do shows, the worst thing is when a bachelorette party walks in.

Speaker 6 You're just...

Speaker 9 This is going to be, and this, now the whole country gets to see why we don't like bachelorette parties. This was just a giant bachelorette party.
Look how rich we are.

Speaker 9 We're going to fly to space for 11 minutes, then we're going to come back and get drunk.

Speaker 10 Yeah, well, isn't that the issue? Because that's the problem. People said when they said like this is feminism and inspiration.
If they just called it space brunch, nobody would have cared.

Speaker 10 You know what I mean? It was just zero-G karaoke, would have been fine. I know.

Speaker 1 I should say, by the way,

Speaker 1 some of the commentary about this seems a little sexist, so I just want to say for the record that I also thought it was stupid when Michael Strahan went up there.

Speaker 12 Hey, get off my boy Strahan now.

Speaker 10 Oh, I do know at one point they're up there and they're, you know, they're all taking selfies, and someone gets their attention and goes, hey, everybody, look at the moon.

Speaker 11 Let's look at the one thing we can already see from the earth.

Speaker 1 But they were marginally closer, you know.

Speaker 1 I should say that on board this ship were Lauren Sanchez, Gail King, Katie Perry, and two women with bad publicists.

Speaker 6 Could you imagine being in the and more on the bottom of this article?

Speaker 1 No, it definitely seemed like a crew that was picked by guys, you know, in the Blue Origin boardroom saying, okay,

Speaker 1 what celebrity deaths could our company recover from?

Speaker 6 Wow.

Speaker 13 First straight hand now, Gail King, how dare you?

Speaker 10 Also, Gail King was defending this, and she said, you know, she said, look, this is actually, this is science and this trip proves that we, one of the things that Blue Origin is trying to do is show that we can shoot waste products in this space.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 10 Which feels like a bit of a self-owned space.

Speaker 6 Did a little bit.

Speaker 1 A little bit.

Speaker 5 All right.

Speaker 1 Your last quote is a description of a particular vacation resort outside New York City.

Speaker 3 It's like summer camp, except with a really fancy bed and premium craft cocktails.

Speaker 7 Right.

Speaker 1 Now that resort was appealing to the growing number of vacationers who are trying to recreate trips from when?

Speaker 3 Bless you.

Speaker 3 Their childhood?

Speaker 1 Yes, their childhood. Very good, Tim.
People are setting out to recreate their childhood vacations. It's a trend the Hilton Hotel chain in their newsletter is calling, quote, time travel.

Speaker 1 And they say it is, quote, about recapturing the sense of joy, stability, and comfort those memories are built on, unquote. Memories like the time your sister bit you in a Motel 6.

Speaker 1 Vintage vehicles are also back. This is true.
That sounds amazing. I'd give anything to once again ride completely unrestrained in the back of a Chevy Caprice station wagon.

Speaker 10 Again, are these people who had nice childhoods?

Speaker 1 That is my supposition.

Speaker 6 Yes.

Speaker 12 But the other part of this is that your family's not there.

Speaker 12 That's the other part of a childhood vacation, is that you went with your family.

Speaker 10 I mean urns are pretty transportable.

Speaker 10 Okay.

Speaker 1 This is true. There's a lot of nostalgia for like old school style travel.
So like they brought back the Pan Am airline brand for like charter trips. You can fly Pan Am again.

Speaker 1 And for extra versimilitude, one-third of the flights will be hijacked to Cuba.

Speaker 6 What word did you just say?

Speaker 1 Versimilitude.

Speaker 6 That's that Harvard Pan Am. That's Harvard.

Speaker 10 In case Trump is listening, realness.

Speaker 1 Bill, how did Tim do on our quiz?

Speaker 3 He gave us a great start. 3MO.

Speaker 6 Well done, Tim.

Speaker 9 Thanks, Tuesday. Bye-bye.

Speaker 1 Right now, panel, it is time for you to answer some questions about this week's news. Alonzo, the drugs we take often pass into drains, toilets, and then into rivers and lakes.

Speaker 1 And it turns out that anti-anxiety drugs are doing what to wild salmon.

Speaker 9 Stopping them from spawning.

Speaker 1 No, it's sort of affecting their behavior.

Speaker 9 This woman downstream.

Speaker 7 How about a hint?

Speaker 1 I'll give you a hint. If you see a salmon riding a motorcycle without a helmet, now you know why.

Speaker 1 They're daredevils? Yeah, it makes them reckless. Reckless wild salmon.
Scientists wanted to see what the drugs we're putting into the rivers via our wastewater were doing to the fish who live there.

Speaker 1 So as an experiment, they dumped a bunch of anti-anxiety meds into the water where some certain salmon were spawning. And they found out those salmon ended up being far more reckless than the others.

Speaker 1 These salmon were like, come on, guys, it's just a bear. What's it going to do? Catch us in the air?

Speaker 13 What is reckless behavior in a fish?

Speaker 1 That's a good question.

Speaker 10 Is it like it lets itself get caught because it wants a lip-piercing?

Speaker 5 Something like that.

Speaker 12 Was this one of them schools that lost funding?

Speaker 10 Can I order Xanax salmon at the restaurant?

Speaker 6 And is that more?

Speaker 1 And of course, the medicated fish were more likely to make it back upstream to spawn, but as many of us have experienced, once they got there, they weren't really interested.

Speaker 9 Gonna have to start spilling some Viagra.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Coming up, our panelists try some Easter innovations in our Bluff the Listener game called 1888. Wait, Wait, Till Play.
We'll be back in a minute with more Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR.

Speaker 14 This message comes from NPR sponsor, CNN. Stream Anthony Bourdain Parts Unknown Prime Cuts Now, exclusively on the CNN app.

Speaker 14 These rarely seen, never-before-streamed episodes dig deep into the Parts Unknown archives with personal insights from Anthony Bourdain and rare behind-the-scenes interviews about each season.

Speaker 14 Anthony Bourdain, Parts Unknown, Prime Cuts, now streaming exclusively on the CNN app. Subscribe now at cnn.com/slash all access, available in the U.S.
only.

Speaker 1 This message comes from NPR sponsor Patagonia. As environmental progress stalls, Patagonia believes it's on businesses to step up.

Speaker 1 The company knows it isn't perfect, but it's proving businesses can make a profit without bankrupting the planet.

Speaker 1 Out now is Patagonia's 2025 Work in Progress Report, a behind-the-scenes look into its impact initiatives from quitting forever chemicals and decarbonizing its supply chain to embracing fair trade.

Speaker 1 Explore more at Patagonia.com slash impact.

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Speaker 3 From NPR and ODB EC Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis.
We are playing this week with Alonzo Bowden, Adam Burke, and Dulce Sloan.

Speaker 3 And here again is your host

Speaker 3 at DPAC in Durham, North Carolina.

Speaker 6 Peter Sago.

Speaker 6 Thank you, Bill.

Speaker 1 Thank you so much. Right now it is time for the WaitWait Don't Tell Me bluff the listener game.
Call 1888 WaitWait to play our game on the air or check out the pinned post on our Instagram page.

Speaker 1 That's at WaitWaitNPR. Hi, you're on WaitWait Don't Tell Me.

Speaker 6 Hi, this is Anthony Oliveira calling from St.

Speaker 8 Louis, Missouri.

Speaker 1 St. Louis, we love St.
Louis, despite being from Chicago. We're cool that way.
What do you do there?

Speaker 8 I'm actually a zookeeper here.

Speaker 7 Wow!

Speaker 6 One of the great zoos.

Speaker 1 Do you get to work with the big fun animals like the tigers and lions and stuff?

Speaker 8 No, I actually work with the insects.

Speaker 7 You have,

Speaker 1 you work in a zoo for insects?

Speaker 1 Are they responsive to your care of the insects? Like, when you walk up with leaves, do all the centipedes crawl over and like sit up and beg?

Speaker 6 No,

Speaker 8 they're really not great for companionship, but I agree.

Speaker 1 Well, Anthony, it's nice to have you with us. You're going to play the game in which you have to tell truth from fiction.
Bill, what's Anthony's topic?

Speaker 3 Easter? I hardly know her.

Speaker 1 Easter is this weekend, and if you are sick of the normal Easter traditions like the Easter bunny, or wondering what the hell is exactly inside a Cadbury cream egg, there is somewhere a brand new Easter trend on the rise.

Speaker 1 Our panel is going to tell you about it. Pick the one who's telling the truth, and you'll win the weight waiter of your choice on your voicemail.
Are you ready to apply?

Speaker 8 Yeah, I'll try my best.

Speaker 1 All right, first let's hear from Adam Burke.

Speaker 10 When Irving Berlin wrote In Your Easter Bonnet with all the frills upon it back in 1933, little could he have imagined that his rocking ode to Vernal Millinery would still resonate with the youth some 90 years later.

Speaker 10 But so it is with some of the biggest influences on social media not only celebrating the colorful headgear, but making bank doing so.

Speaker 10 I first did a shoot of me in a homemade Easter bonnet as a joke, says popular Instagrammer Tabitha Klack, who boasts 2 million followers online.

Speaker 10 When the pics proved a hit, high-end fashion supply company Seams Pricey reached out for a collab, as the kids say.

Speaker 10 Before long, Klack realized she could fit multiple sponsors on a single bonnet, with one of her 2023 pieces sporting a bottle of air freshener, several candy brands, and a fifth of vodka all artfully attached to her festive crown.

Speaker 10 This in turn motivated the competition with rival influencers trying to see how many promotional items they could cram onto their seasonally adorned noggins.

Speaker 10 I might have overdone it last year, says beauty influencer Skylar Schapp, who somehow managed to attach five shoe brands and a compact air fryer onto her Easter 2024 bonnet, injuring her neck in the process.

Speaker 10 Undeterred, she plans to return this year with some Tylenol-branded haberdashery with matching neck brace, of course.

Speaker 1 Easter bonnet influencers on the rise. Your next story in your Easter basket comes from Alonzo Bowden.

Speaker 9 While Leah Winley of York, Iowa loved clothes, she also loved Jesus. So this year she and her friends Andrea and Debbie all gave up buying clothes for Lent.
Well new clothes that is. Vintage is fine.

Speaker 9 Now, as Easter nears, Leah's Lent fashion has started a huge craze. Everybody's wearing the new Easter vintage look around York, and it's not just regular vintage, they've gone Victorian.

Speaker 9 But apparently the local cineplex hasn't shown a Christmas carol for a while, so they're guessing how to wear the different items.

Speaker 9 When Andrea arrived at church in a corset, she was told by the very agitated minister that a corset isn't actually a shirt.

Speaker 9 Debbie thought her bustle skirt was quite elegant when she put it on, but it was also huge and she lost half of it climbing out of her uber.

Speaker 9 The church church elders, while impressed with the young women's efforts, asked that perhaps next year they could give up fruit or chocolate instead.

Speaker 1 Vintage Victorian Easterware gets popular in Iowa. Your last bunny tale comes from Dulce Sloan.

Speaker 12 In today's edition of Voting Does Matter, Cooks and homemakers on the internet are suggesting we dye potatoes for Easter because eggs are too expensive. expensive.

Speaker 12 Yes, I said potatoes. It's a move that had one arrival ask, what in the Great Depression is this?

Speaker 12 So this year we will celebrate the resurrection of my Lord and Savior by releasing hordes of well-dressed children into a backyard to search for colorful tubers.

Speaker 12 There's even a recipe for deviled potatoes too.

Speaker 12 That's got to be an unsettling experience. You think you're biting into an egg, but no, it's a potato.

Speaker 12 And sure, dyeing and decorating eggs is the Easter tradition. But do you know why?

Speaker 1 No, me neither.

Speaker 1 All right, here are your choices. From Adam Burke, influencers on Insta and elsewhere are taking up the Easter bonnet to show off.
their paid promotions.

Speaker 1 From Alonso, a group of ladies in Iowa go all Victorian in their Easter wear.

Speaker 1 Or from Dulce, because of the price of eggs, more and more people are hiding Easter potatoes on the lawn for their kids to find. Which of these is the real story of a new trend in Easter?

Speaker 8 I'm going to go with Dulce's story about

Speaker 7 dyed potatoes.

Speaker 1 You're choosing Dulce's story well to bring you the correct answer. We spoke to someone who is familiar with it.

Speaker 14 Potato skin is not the same color as eggs, Jones.

Speaker 1 Which is part of the reason that they're not a good substitute. That was Amanda Mactus, the associate editor of Delish, who commented on the real story of potatoes being used in place of Easter eggs.

Speaker 1 She doesn't recommend it. Neither do we.
However, Anthony, you got it right. Dulce was telling the truth.
She gets a point. You win our prize.
The voice of your choice on your voicemail.

Speaker 7 Well done.

Speaker 11 Thank you. Thank you.

Speaker 1 And now the game where we have local celebrities on to answer questions about things that are far away.

Speaker 1 Now, you might know Lewis Black is one of the most successful comedians of the last 30 years or from his comedy specials or from his Back in Black segments on The Daily Show or from his role playing the actual embodiment of rage in the Inside Out movies.

Speaker 1 But did you know he is a proud University of North Carolina alumni. We are happy

Speaker 1 to welcome him back to the place where he learned his genteel manners. Lewis Black, welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

Speaker 11 Well, thank you.

Speaker 6 It's a great to have you.

Speaker 4 It's great to be here.

Speaker 6 So

Speaker 1 you are very well known and have been for a long time for your rants, for getting angry and upset about things. Was that something you did from the beginning, or did you discover it one day?

Speaker 11 I discovered it. I mean, and I really, I wasn't angry on stage.

Speaker 11 I realized that I was suppressing the anger.

Speaker 11 Finally, as I was rolling along,

Speaker 11 a friend of mine, another comic, came up who was,

Speaker 11 and he said, you know,

Speaker 11 you're really angry, and you should let it come out. You should go on stage and yell everything.

Speaker 11 And he said, I'm on stage yelling all the time, and nothing that I'm yelling about should anybody be angry about. I mean, this is a guy who put plumbers' helpers on his head.

Speaker 11 And so I did it. And it literally was, I went,

Speaker 6 that's it. Does it go?

Speaker 1 And that was it. So your life was changed by Gallagher.

Speaker 6 That's amazing.

Speaker 6 Who knew?

Speaker 1 So, I mean, they used to say about Don Rickles, who did insult comedy, that he was an absolute sweetheart in real life, nicest guy you ever met. Is that like you?

Speaker 1 Are you like actually in real life not that angry?

Speaker 11 No, I mean who could be that angry?

Speaker 7 It's exhausting.

Speaker 1 I thought you actually thought you were the best at it. Well,

Speaker 11 I am.

Speaker 11 I wake up and either I'm looking at a newspaper, I'm turning the TV on or I'm looking at my phone. And within five minutes, I'm

Speaker 6 livid.

Speaker 11 Something has occurred that has driven me completely nuts.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think everybody listening and watching you right now have had that experience but none of us have figured out how to make a living out of it.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 10 You don't work up to it. You don't go like I'm gonna be irked first and then like slightly annoyed just straight to rage.

Speaker 6 Oh yeah.

Speaker 11 There's no there's no pedal.

Speaker 6 No problem.

Speaker 9 Lou, I don't know if if I ever told you this, and to everyone, Louis Black is a friend and one of my comedy heroes.

Speaker 9 I had to stop watching you so I didn't do you because the rants just come out and then you realize like, wow, I'm as mad as Lewis Black.

Speaker 4 I'm doing really good here.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 6 I got to calm down a notch.

Speaker 7 Love you, man.

Speaker 9 Love you from day one.

Speaker 6 I've seen you the same.

Speaker 10 You've become.

Speaker 1 You've become so well known for it and so successful at it, it's what people expect.

Speaker 1 And I'm wondering if it's ever if it's ever like hard, if you ever have to take a moment, meditate, and find your unhappy place. Oh.

Speaker 6 No.

Speaker 1 Just always right there.

Speaker 11 No, I and I'm sure you've experienced the same. I could be standing off stage talking to somebody about their like their new dog

Speaker 4 or

Speaker 11 you've got a puppy and kind of be waxing on with them about it and then it's like showtime and literally that's it boom and now we're we're off and I just started.

Speaker 6 Wow.

Speaker 11 There's it's just the way it is. I mean, I've been doing it so long, it's automatic.

Speaker 1 Do people like, because you're well-known and beloved, do people ever come up here and go, wow, Lewis Black? Hey, condemn me.

Speaker 6 People,

Speaker 11 people, I have achieved something that is so bizarre, they will actually tell me, and I can't, can you, you, will they just send, what happens if I say the word?

Speaker 1 You can do whatever you want because cool now.

Speaker 11 Go ahead. Yeah, okay.
So they will say, could you write,

Speaker 11 could you give me an autograph for my brother-in-law and just write,

Speaker 6 Tommy.

Speaker 6 And

Speaker 6 I'm like, okay.

Speaker 11 And I have literally was approached time after time, can we take a picture?

Speaker 11 Do you want to do this?

Speaker 4 Yeah, let's do this.

Speaker 1 It's true.

Speaker 4 Yep.

Speaker 1 For the radio listeners, a rude gesture was made.

Speaker 12 See, and that's a professional note that they're not going to have.

Speaker 1 The one thing that we found out about you that I was genuinely surprised by is that you have been the paid spokesman for Aruba, the island of vacation destination.

Speaker 9 Yeah.

Speaker 5 God bless.

Speaker 11 That was a great gig.

Speaker 6 I bet it was.

Speaker 4 That really was.

Speaker 1 But I'm thinking to myself, like, what was the process where like some advertising agency said, okay, Aruba, beautiful, lovely, laid-back, I know Lewis Black.

Speaker 11 The idea was that I obviously hated everything,

Speaker 11 but I liked Aruba.

Speaker 6 And reason enough for everyone to get on a plane and go there.

Speaker 6 I remember the slogan, Aruba, it's gorgeous.

Speaker 1 Was the idea like it transformed you? So they'd say, like, Mr. Black, I'm afraid we've lost your hotel reservation, you can't stay.

Speaker 6 And you'd be like, okay.

Speaker 4 It was really something.

Speaker 11 But we shot, you know, it was like we shot five ads in like three days.

Speaker 9 It was a lot. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 It was tough three days and Aruba.

Speaker 11 But it was 110 degrees and get me some sunblock. And does anybody have an umbrella? It's, I'm dying here.

Speaker 11 I love the idea.

Speaker 1 Like, the whole idea of the campaign is that Aruba is so lovely, it can even make Lewis Black happy. And while making making these ads, you are in fact miserable.

Speaker 13 It's genius.

Speaker 6 It really is.

Speaker 10 Because he's more Lewis Black than Aruba is Aruba.

Speaker 6 Exactly.

Speaker 1 Well, Lewis Black, what a pleasure to have you here. We have...

Speaker 1 Yes, it is.

Speaker 1 We have invited you here to play a game we're calling...

Speaker 5 Hush now.

Speaker 3 Stop your ranting and go to sleep.

Speaker 1 Since you're all about getting riled up, we thought we'd ask you three questions about calming people down, specifically babies.

Speaker 4 Seriously.

Speaker 6 Seriously.

Speaker 1 So, all you have to do is answer two or three questions about shushing, and you'll win our prize for one of our listeners, the voice of anyone they might like for their voicemail.

Speaker 1 Bill, who is Louis Black playing for?

Speaker 3 Jolene Dugas of Durham, North Carolina.

Speaker 6 All right.

Speaker 1 First question: Most people, of course, soothe their babies to sleep with lullabies, and one lullaby written by a father for his own little baby went on to become incredibly famous.

Speaker 1 Most people know that lullaby as what? A, the theme from Jaws,

Speaker 1 the theme from Jeopardy, or C, Sir Mixalott's baby got back.

Speaker 6 I can't hear you.

Speaker 4 When I heard the E.

Speaker 10 You think it's C?

Speaker 6 It's B, right?

Speaker 11 It's got to be the Jeopardy thing.

Speaker 1 It is the Jeopardy thing.

Speaker 6 Berg Griffin

Speaker 1 wrote it for his son, and he went on to create Jeopardy. And by virtue of it being used as the theme song for so long, Mr.
Griffin earned about $70 million in royalties from it. So

Speaker 11 what was the song?

Speaker 6 What did these swaps? No words.

Speaker 1 No, there's no words. It's ta-ta-ta-ta.

Speaker 4 No, they gotta be. Go to sleep, you little prick.

Speaker 11 There has to be words.

Speaker 6 Now you owe Marv Griffin $3 million.

Speaker 6 There are words now.

Speaker 1 That was very well done.

Speaker 1 Two more questions here. Lullabies are common around the world, but they change as per different cultures.
So, for example, a popular lullaby in Brazil has parents singing what to their child.

Speaker 1 A, someday you will grow up to improve your looks with plastic surgery.

Speaker 1 B a monster crocodile is coming to get you. Or C, Sir Mixalot's baby got back, but

Speaker 1 in Portuguese.

Speaker 11 It's got to be the crocodile.

Speaker 1 It is the crocodile, yeah. A lot of, apparently,

Speaker 1 a lot of global lullabies threaten babies with terrible outcomes if they don't quiet down.

Speaker 4 Then I could have had a child. Yeah,

Speaker 6 you were not against it.

Speaker 13 Or falling out of a tree.

Speaker 1 All right, last question to be perfect. There are other ways to soothe babies.
In fact, some parents swear by what soothing technique. A, playing YouTube videos to babies of Jim Kramer's show on CNBC.

Speaker 1 B, playing recordings of the baby's own crying back to them to see how they like it.

Speaker 1 Or C, placing them comfortably and snugly inside the gallon-size Stanley Insulated Cup.

Speaker 7 Wow. Yeah.

Speaker 11 I think they play the baby crying.

Speaker 1 You're exactly right.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 6 What?

Speaker 1 Yeah, the idea is that babies are fascinated by other babies, even themselves, even when crying, so it works. Bill, how did Lewis Black do in our quiz?

Speaker 3 No ranting about this. He won it all.

Speaker 6 Three in a row.

Speaker 6 Woo!

Speaker 1 Lewis Black is a comedian, actor, and host of the Ramcast. You can find his tour dates at LewisBlack.com, including, I should say, a date coming up in just a week.

Speaker 9 Yeah, April 29th, I'll be at Memorial Hall at Chapel Hill.

Speaker 1 Lewis Black, thank you so much for being with us.

Speaker 10 Thank you. Here

Speaker 6 in Durham. What a thrill

Speaker 1 in just a minute bill chows down on his jurassic lunch it's our listener limerick challenge call 188 wait wait to join us in the air we'll be back in a minute with more wait wait don't tell me from npr

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Speaker 3 From NPR and WBEC Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis.
We're playing this week with Adam Burke, Alonzo Bowden, and Dulce Sloan.

Speaker 3 And here again is your host at DeepAC in Durham, North Carolina, Peter Sagal.

Speaker 6 Thank you, Bill.

Speaker 1 In just a minute, Bill insists on reading us some of his latest poems. It's our listener limerick challenge.
If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1888-WAITWAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924.

Speaker 1 Right now, Pandel, some more questions for you from the week's news.

Speaker 1 Dul say, a lot of people claim they don't have time to exercise because they're too busy doing chores around the house, but a new study suggests you can still get the benefits of exercise by doing what?

Speaker 6 Dang.

Speaker 6 It's not that. Not that.

Speaker 6 Can I get a hint?

Speaker 1 Go, go, and get the dishwasher. Go, stop.
Come on, go.

Speaker 12 Doing stuff faster?

Speaker 1 Yes, doing your chores faster.

Speaker 12 These sound like the same people that came up with stand-up discs.

Speaker 1 Maybe.

Speaker 1 Using a data set that tracked the daily movements of thousands of people, they found that people who did not exercise got some of the same benefits just from doing their daily activities faster.

Speaker 1 So don't just iron your sheets, iron man your sheets.

Speaker 6 Who's ironing sheets?

Speaker 10 This is a great point.

Speaker 6 This is

Speaker 7 Some people do.

Speaker 7 What? They do.

Speaker 12 Who are these antebellum researchers for?

Speaker 1 You know, they're heating the irons in the fireplace, as one does.

Speaker 10 Unless you're a really persnickety clan member who's ironing shit.

Speaker 7 No, this is great.

Speaker 6 I mean...

Speaker 6 You know what? They're never wrinkled.

Speaker 6 See? How do you... That doesn't come naturally.

Speaker 1 No, all you have to do is just do everything quickly around the house.

Speaker 12 Is it because it adds more steps?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it adds more steps. It stresses your heart just like regular, say, exercise does.
It increases the load, and so you get benefits.

Speaker 12 That just sounds like a way to break all of your dishware.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 10 And should you make things heavier, too? Like, should you have a

Speaker 6 broom?

Speaker 1 You should make your bed with a weighted blanket. You should clean your toilet with a brush attached to a 40-pound kettlebell.

Speaker 9 I'm just wondering, how big would your house have to be

Speaker 9 to be able to build up speed doing chores.

Speaker 9 I mean if you could afford a house that big, you could get a personal trainer.

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 10 And also someone to do the chores for you.

Speaker 1 Adam, this week we read about a mathematical formula. BDE equals FAM6 plus FR2, and it goes on.
It's part of a complicated new equation that calculates the perfect what.

Speaker 10 I think I know what BDE is.

Speaker 6 It's not that. It doesn't change that in this case.
Okay.

Speaker 1 In fact, I'll give you the B and the E. It's best D ever.

Speaker 1 And it's still not what you're thinking of.

Speaker 10 Oh, is it literally a formula for happiness?

Speaker 1 Yes, it's the best day ever. It is the formula for the perfect day.

Speaker 6 Ah.

Speaker 1 And here it is, everybody. You've always wanted to know.

Speaker 10 Didn't Lou Reed already come up with that?

Speaker 6 I think he did, yeah.

Speaker 1 But the formula, because everybody wants to know what the best day ever is, here it is. Ready? Six hours spent with family, two with friends, two of exercise,

Speaker 1 less than six hours of work, one hour of eating and drinking, and 1.5 hours of, quote, extra socializing.

Speaker 1 This replaces the former perfect day model, Bloody Mary, big lunch, learn something bad happen to your ex in bed by 10.

Speaker 4 So I'm supposed to believe

Speaker 12 that the best day ever don't include no sexy time? That's a lot.

Speaker 12 I'm supposed to believe that hanging out with my mama is better than

Speaker 6 having sexy time.

Speaker 6 Lies, lies!

Speaker 10 Or is that what they're calling extra-socialization?

Speaker 1 I think actually that is, now that I think of it.

Speaker 12 All right, just making sure.

Speaker 1 I was thinking of asking you, Dulce, what your perfect day is, but we have children here, so.

Speaker 12 I mean, listen, my perfect day, watching my favorite TV show, having a delicious treat,

Speaker 12 being at the beach, and then adult time

Speaker 10 all right now express that as a formula where A is adult time how it can be expressed M Y B mine your tree

Speaker 10 and

Speaker 10 be almost weariness

Speaker 1 Coming up it's lightning fill in the blank but first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme if you'd like to play on air with us call or leave a message at 188-WATHETWAITH.

Speaker 1 That's 1-888-924-8924. You can catch us if you'd like to come see us most weeks at the Student Baker Theater in downtown Chicago, or come see us on the road.

Speaker 1 We'll be in Portland, Maine on the 26th and 27th of June, and at Tanglewood in Western Massachusetts on August 28th. For tickets and information to all of our live shows, go to nprpresents.org.

Speaker 1 How are you running WaitWait? Don't tell me.

Speaker 14 Peter, this is Alice. I'm calling from Park City, Utah.

Speaker 1 Hey Alice, how are you? It's nice to hear from you.

Speaker 6 I'm good.

Speaker 1 Park City is great. I'm sorry you just lost the film festival.
Or are you sorry about that?

Speaker 10 Not really. No,

Speaker 1 Sundance, of course, was in Park City, and they just moved it away.

Speaker 1 You didn't enjoy that?

Speaker 1 I'm okay with not having the tourists here.

Speaker 8 Okay.

Speaker 1 Well, welcome to the show, Alice Bilkert. This is going to read you three news-related limericks with a last word or phrase missing from each.

Speaker 1 If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly on two of the limericks, you will be a big winner. You ready to go? I am.

Speaker 3 All right, here's your first limerick i used to crave foods that the swine adore but now i eat kale with a primal roar with diplodocus feasts my gut health has increased now i chomp on raw greens like a

Speaker 6 or

Speaker 1 no it's a three-syllable answer

Speaker 8 oh carnivore

Speaker 1 Oh, so close. Many of these were carnivores.
Older, very old. Prehistoric carnivores.

Speaker 6 Herbivore.

Speaker 1 Am I just like barking up the wrong tree? A little bit, a little bit. I'm just going to give you the answer.
It's dinosaur.

Speaker 1 The latest food trend involves eating handfuls of, you know, your kale and lettuce and greens right out of the bag without any toppings or dressing at all. They're calling it dinosaur time.

Speaker 1 But I'm calling it just giving up.

Speaker 1 It's so weird. Dinosaur time used to be what you called it when you dated an older gentleman.

Speaker 12 That's called paying your rent.

Speaker 1 This is a great way to get your important veggies in because it's so time-consuming to make a salad. On the other hand, no, it isn't.
I just did it while standing here.

Speaker 1 Here is your next limerick.

Speaker 3 Cords and sockets make night rest real sweet. Though I'm still not quite clear on the deets.

Speaker 3 Night terrors I'm shedding by grounding my bedding. I sleep when I plug in my

Speaker 5 sheets? Sheets, yes.

Speaker 1 Yes, in the companies like Down to Ground and Earth and Moon are making headlines for their sheets that you plug into an electrical outlet.

Speaker 1 Surprisingly, these headlines are not couple murdered by their sheets.

Speaker 1 Here's how it works. You take these sheets, they got a cable, and you plug it just into the grounding plug of your electrical outlet.

Speaker 1 And they say, as your body produces static electricity throughout the night, the sheeps ground the electricity and keep you balanced.

Speaker 1 It's simple, and according to the website, it's quote science-backed.

Speaker 1 So it is definitely legit.

Speaker 12 This is just an electric blanket.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 12 this is half an electric blanket.

Speaker 1 Well, an electric blanket does something, it warms up, keeps you warm. Yeah, your hat!

Speaker 1 This

Speaker 1 does nothing.

Speaker 10 These guys make the my pillow guy seem like Thomas Edison.

Speaker 6 Really true.

Speaker 1 All right, here is your last limerick.

Speaker 3 When AI learns to translate, we all win. Under C clicks and whistles, we'll call in.
A bottle's nose swimmer will be this round's winner. The limericks won by a...

Speaker 6 Dolphin. Yes, dolphin!

Speaker 7 Here you go!

Speaker 1 Researchers have developed a large language model that will hopefully eventually use AI to understand the language of dolphins.

Speaker 1 The lead researcher says the goal would be to one day speak dolphin, which is not going to be pretty knowing dolphins. They're going to be saying, hey, you check out that trainer.

Speaker 1 I'd like to balance his balls on my nose if you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 It's not me, it was the dolphin. It was the dolphin.
It's not me.

Speaker 6 I didn't write that.

Speaker 1 Scientists hope that when

Speaker 1 they deploy this in the wild this season, they can understand dolphins' conversations with one another because that will be an important step toward our next goal: blackmailing dolphins.

Speaker 12 We already, but like we taught, you know, Coco the gorilla is the prime example of us teaching animals to communicate.

Speaker 13 Right.

Speaker 12 And she didn't really have nothing to say.

Speaker 12 Because that's the thing that y'all keep forgetting we be trying to talk to these animals. Maybe they don't want to talk to us.

Speaker 6 Have you met us? I don't.

Speaker 10 I feel the other way about it.

Speaker 10 I don't want to talk to a dolphin. I don't trust anyone that smiles all the time.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Bill, how did Alice do in her quiz?

Speaker 3 Alice will be swimming with the dolphins. Two out of three.
Wright is a win.

Speaker 1 Congratulations, Alice.

Speaker 6 Thank you.

Speaker 11 Take care.

Speaker 1 Thank you. Take care.
Bye now.

Speaker 9 Bye-bye.

Speaker 2 This message comes from Fisher Investments. Senior Vice President Michael Hossmar explains the importance of providing a comprehensive approach for clients.

Speaker 16 The culture at Fisher Investments, it's about helping. It's about improving our clients' financial situation, advising not just for now, but all the way through, hopefully, to their next generation.

Speaker 16 A well-designed financial plan will cover a number of important topics, and many of these topics are connected to each other.

Speaker 16 Fisher Investments possesses the professional expertise across all these important disciplines, from investment management to tax minimization to estate planning, you name it.

Speaker 2 Learn more at FisherInvestments.com. Investing in securities involves the risk of loss.

Speaker 1 Support for this podcast and the following message come from Dignity Memorial. For many families, remembering loved ones means honoring the details that made them unique.

Speaker 1 Dignity Memorial is dedicated to professionalism and compassion in every detail of a life celebration. Find a provider near you at dignitymemorial.com.

Speaker 1 Now it's time for our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can.

Speaker 1 Each quick answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

Speaker 3 Adam has one, Alonzo has two, Dulce has four.

Speaker 1 Dulce, you're clearly in the lead. Alonzo is in second, and Adam is in third place.
So, Adam, we start with you.

Speaker 1 Here we go. Fill in the blank.
On Wednesday, a federal judge threatened to open a contempt inquiry against the blank.

Speaker 9 Trump administration. Exactly.

Speaker 1 On Tuesday, researchers in Texas said funding cuts have slowed that state's response to the blank outbreak. Measles? Right.

Speaker 1 On Thursday, the Supreme Court said they'd hear arguments on Trump's plan to end birthright blank. Citizenship.

Speaker 1 Right, on Monday, the FAA announced plans to test a new system made to detect unregistered blanks.

Speaker 1 Drones? Right, this week authorities in Kenya caught two teens trying to smuggle blank out of the country. Forgeraps.
No, 5,000 ants.

Speaker 1 On Thursday, NASA confirmed that the James Webb Telescope has detected a possible sign of blank on a distant planet. Life.

Speaker 1 Right, on Wednesday, a judge dismissed a lawsuit against the New Orleans blanks for their use of a fleur-de-lis.

Speaker 1 Saints? Yeah, the the Saints. After his wife explained that money was tight and they couldn't afford their annual family holiday, a man in the UK came up with an ingenious solution and blanked.

Speaker 10 Took him on the vacation he had when he was a kid? No,

Speaker 1 he booked the vacation anyway with the kids, but not his wife.

Speaker 1 His wife said that this extensive house renovation they had just done meant they wouldn't have the money to all go on vacation. The husband said, I guess you're right.

Speaker 1 Went ahead and booked one for him and the kids and not her.

Speaker 1 It's a really smart financial decision because from now on he'll never have to worry about going on vacation with his wife ever again or even living with her.

Speaker 1 Bill, how did Adam do with our quiz?

Speaker 7 I think he did rather well.

Speaker 5 He's way out in front.

Speaker 3 Six right, 12 more points, total of 13 than the league. All right.

Speaker 1 Alonzo, you are up next, fill in the blank. On Wednesday, the White House confirmed tariffs of up to 245% on some products from Blank.
China.

Speaker 1 Right, on Tuesday, Blank gave his first public remarks since leaving office. Biden.
Right, this week, officials in Puerto Rico said the cause of an island-wide blank is still unclear. Blackout.
Right.

Speaker 1 On Tuesday, two attendees at Blank's town hall were tased with stun guns.

Speaker 9 Marjorie Taylor Greene.

Speaker 1 That's right. According to new data, millions of people in Sweden are currently glued to their TVs watching Blank.

Speaker 6 Hockey?

Speaker 1 Watching 24-hour live coverage of this year's moose migration.

Speaker 1 On Tuesday, Director Chris Columbus said he wishes he could remove Blank's cameo from Home Alone 2.

Speaker 6 Trump.

Speaker 1 Right. This week a woman went viral because she refused to take off a Zoom filter that made her face look like a plate of breakfast during Blank.

Speaker 9 A meeting?

Speaker 1 Well, specifically, she refused to stop using that filter that made her face look like a plate of breakfast during a job interview.

Speaker 1 Doing it over Zoom, she left the breakfast filter on entirely, her eyes superimposed over fried eggs, her mouth on a slice of toast.

Speaker 1 She explained to the somewhat somewhat confused interviewer that she was, quote, not feeling well today and using the filter to help.

Speaker 1 That's one way to be memorable. She was.

Speaker 7 That's how you get a job at Waffle House. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Bill, how did Alonzo do in our quiz?

Speaker 3 Well, he's making it a very close race. Five rights, ten more points, but his 12 is one short of Adam.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, how many then does Dulce need to win the game?

Speaker 3 Five to win.

Speaker 1 Here we go, Dulce. This is for the the game.
They're on your side. Here we go.

Speaker 1 On Tuesday, Mark Zuckerberg took the stand at an antitrust trial to defend his company, Blank. Facebook? Yeah, Meta, but Facebook as well.

Speaker 1 According to a new study, blanking faster could reduce risk of abnormal heart rhythms.

Speaker 13 Breathing faster.

Speaker 1 Walking faster. This week, an election debate in Canada was delayed two hours so that it didn't interrupt blank.

Speaker 6 Hockey.

Speaker 1 Right. On Monday, the Vatican announced they were putting architect Anthony Gaudi on the path to blankhood.
Sainthood? Right.

Speaker 1 This week, Twinkies announced that they were now shifting their marketing away from families and towards blanks.

Speaker 7 Single men. No.

Speaker 1 Stoners.

Speaker 13 Single men!

Speaker 1 Twinkies is embracing its destiny and going right for the stoners.

Speaker 1 They announced the creation of the Munchie Mobile, which will tour the country's dispensaries and hand out free snacks to the customers there.

Speaker 1 It's like the Oscar Meyer Wiener Mobile if the Wiener Mobile kept forgetting to pick its little brother up from middle school.

Speaker 1 Bill, did Dulce do well enough to win?

Speaker 3 She got four rights, eight more points, 12. That means she's one behind the Irishman who wins.

Speaker 6 Wow, and a merch. Here you go.

Speaker 1 In just a minute, now that we know people are recreating their childhood vacations, we're going to ask our panelists to predict what will be the next surprising vacation trend.

Speaker 1 But first, let me tell you all.

Speaker 1 Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and W Be Easy Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions, Doug Berman, Benevolent Overlord Philip Godeka, Reds, our Limericks, our public address announcer is Paul Friedman.

Speaker 1 Our tour manager is Shane Adonald. Thanks to the staff and crew here at D-PAC.
A very special thanks to everyone at WUNC. BJ Lederman composed our theme.

Speaker 1 Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Grombos, and Lillian King. Special thanks this week to Finney Thomas and Monica Hickey.
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Speaker 1 Our jolly good fellow is Hannah Anderson. Emma Choi is our vibe curator.
Technical direction is from Lorna White. Our CFO is Colin Miller.
Our production manager is Robert Newhouse.

Speaker 1 Our senior producer is Ian Chillock. And the executive producer of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is Michael Danforth.
Now, panel, what will be the next vacation trend? Alonzo Bowden.

Speaker 9 Walking because no one can afford to fly.

Speaker 4 Adam Burke.

Speaker 10 Jeff Bezos is going to unroll Blue Origin Economy, where it's it's a square-shaped capsule with it's just Amazon delivery driver.

Speaker 6 You just become an Amazon delivery driver.

Speaker 1 Dulce Sloan.

Speaker 12 IG baddies are going to the Poconos instead of Miami because the Poconos sound like islands.

Speaker 3 And if any of that happens, we're going to ask you about it on WAID.

Speaker 7 Wait, don't tell me.

Speaker 1 Thank you, Bill Curtis. Thanks also to Adam Burke, Alonso Baldo, and Dulce Sloan.
Thanks to our fabulous audience here in Durham, North Carolina.

Speaker 1 Thanks to all of you for listening, wherever you might be. I'm Peter Sagan.
We'll see you next week.

Speaker 1 This is NPR.

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