WDWDY #32: 28% Joe Rogan

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Podcasts, there are millions of them.

Some might say, too many.

I have one already.

I don't have any because there are enough.

Politics, business, sport, you name it.

There's a podcast about it, and they all ask the big questions and cover the hot topics of the day.

But nobody is covering the most important topic of all.

Why is that?

Are they scared?

Too afraid of being censored by the man?

Possibly, but not us.

We're here to ask the only question that matters.

We'll try and say it at the same time, Max.

What did you do yesterday?

What did you do yesterday?

What did you do yesterday?

That's it.

All we're interested in is what the guests got up to yesterday.

Nothing more.

Day before yesterday, Max?

Nope.

The greatest and most interesting day of your life.

Unless it was yesterday, we don't want to know about it.

I'm Max Rushton, and I'm David O'Doherty.

Welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday?

Hello, and welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday, midweek mayhem.

From the people that bring you What Did You Do Yesterday, the one at the weekend with a guest.

It's just me and David O'Doherty.

Welcome, David.

You may notice a little difference in my accent because I'm coming to you from a new location.

Oh, you've gentrified yourself in that there, Edinburgh.

Aye, Max.

It is the only accent.

I mean, I'm not saying it's a good accent, but it is the only accent that I back myself in being able to pull off.

A posh Edinburgh accent.

It's very good.

Yeah.

It's very good.

It's just from a lifetime or what, 25 years of doing the Edinburgh fringe.

Have you not got a New York in you?

You must have.

Why I oughta.

No, my American accent tends to be more sort of Texan, you know what I mean?

Which is from sort of cowboy movies.

I'm going to come down there.

I'm going to teach you a lesson with my fists.

Yeah, okay.

Is that because you think one day you could be cast alongside Javier Bardem in a kind of moody Western?

I can see it.

Definitely.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I would play

beleaguered sheriff of a town that's being overrun.

That's the role that I see for you.

Oh, yeah.

Really good.

People may notice.

And actually, on another popular podcast that I do, Barrick Lindening suggested that my voice sounded different in the northern hemisphere.

But I haven't been on like a two-week-long bender.

I just have a chested cough.

The phlegm is almost solid, David.

It's amazing.

You've had it for a while now.

And have you just been taking loads of steroids?

Because you know the way like sort of steroid guys lose some sort of vocal thing.

And it's such a funny time to get juiced.

It's such a funny time to decide.

I'm here for a couple of months to see my family, but I just don't want my dad to think less of me.

And he's such a beefcake himself, you know.

Former professor of medicine at Trinity Hall, Cambridge.

It's like all he cares about is how big my neck muscles are.

He's constantly saying, have you tried this for your dips?

When we meet up for coffee, he's like, he's got a new exercise that he works out for his lats.

That's what he says.

He says, my lats are feeling great.

He's 86, but he's, there's not a sinew face just one big six pack he's got an eight pack so uh i want to impress him and so yeah i'm as we speak blood is coming out of one thigh it's going in and around the corner to where some cycling heads have it and then it's coming back up in the other one oh yeah you're having you're i'm reblooding myself

because i podcast so much to podcast at this level continuously you can't do it without drugs yeah i also heard that to try and boost our ratings we've stolen the blood of more successful podcasters.

I have a liter of Rory Stewart here that I'm about to pop in.

And you've got...

I'm 28% Rogan now.

My views on the world are slowly changing as well.

I've got a bit of Jordan Peterson, guys.

Just a wonderful coagulation of alpha thoughts that are going to course into this podcast.

And my Rory Stewart is suddenly I start saying things.

I think the lessons we can learn from Tanzania are.

And you're like, David,

when I was walking across Persia,

I'll know that it's hit in the Rory Stewart blood has hit in there.

I really will.

Hey, now, by the way, we're still selling tickets for the live show.

By the time this goes out, honestly, I had a look.

The only thing you can get now is kind of restricted view.

Yeah.

Narrow.

I clicked on this little exclamation mark right at the top of the top of the Hackney Empire, right?

I think it's sort of above the roof.

Yeah.

And it says, you know, restricted view, narrow seat, like facing the wrong way, next to a man with a pneumatic drill.

Like, it's almost like they didn't need to put that seat in.

But if you are desperate, that seat is still available.

And also bear in mind, because me and Max are juicing so much at the moment, we will be bigger lads.

So even if the view is restricted, we're such big lads, you'll be able to see us wherever you are.

You'll see David's triceps only from this part of the upper circle.

I think there's one remaining sort of seat in the dress when I saw it in the dress circle.

So go and get that before anyone else does.

This is small time chat.

Like to go back to, there's no way, you know, Alistair,

Alistair Stewart.

Alistair Stewart is the mixture of.

He is.

Of Rory Stewart and Alistair thing.

They're his two children.

Alistair Campbell and Rory Stewart are the children of Alistair Stewart.

HackneyEmpire.co.uk.

If you want to come and watch this sort of conversation, but live, really.

Just in Trevor Nelson feedback.

Yeah.

Brianne says, I thought Trevor Nelson was Trevor McDonald this whole time.

Oh, my God.

It did make Max's microwave anecdote all the more bonkers.

Imagine my confusion when Max describes who I thought was Trevor McDonald as the pioneer of soul music in the UK.

I wonder what Trevor McDonald did yesterday.

I mean, we have an inn, don't we?

Trevor McDonald, because famous.

Darren O'Brien.

Yes.

What's Dara's link to Trevor McDonald?

Trevor McDonald lives in the same part of London that Dara does.

No, Gary Lineker.

It's Lineker and McDonald.

It wasn't Dara.

Was it Dara?

I think they might all live on the same terrace like the Beatles in a hard day's night.

And

all of our guests open their front doors at the same time.

Was it Dara who was hoying his dog mess at Trevor McDonald's window?

Oh, no.

We've blended all these episodes together.

And Lineker bumps into Trevor McDonald in the street and they have a national treasure off where they nod at each other.

I did ask Gary to ask Trevor, but I haven't asked Gary yet about the wagon wheel.

What do I do first?

And I can't send him two questions in one message.

Another one of your increasingly tedious texts to Gary Litiger is, have you ever thrown dog shit in a bag at Trevor McDonald's window?

Or was that Richard Osmond or Darrell Brion?

Yeah, we can't remember.

And we sure as hell can't be bothered to listen back.

Could you listen back to the back catalogue, Gary?

While I inject a bit of your blood into my head to make this podcast more successful.

Do you have any blood?

Could I have a liter?

Should I just do that?

Could I have a litre of your blood?

Producer Milesbaum makes a good point.

If only there was a website for this reason, everything is showbiz.com.

You can find out where Trevor McDonald lives.

That's a weird thing to say.

You can triangulate Trevor McDonald's house by all the other guests who are doing well enough in their life to live in that posh part of southwest London.

And you too can throw dog shit at his windows.

Well, just as Trevor nelson was amazed to find out that i was not barry your other irish sidekick about an hour in about an hour into this person

has found out that trevor mcdonald and trevor nelson are not the same guy so yes well lawrence says look there's quote there's no getting away from it he's a microwave fan peek what did you do yesterday this is why we are here johnny says he says what did you do yesterday is the shit hands down my favorite podcast well done lads the secrets to life and hilarity is in the minutiae of the mundane, especially when Max gets excited about something small and says, here we go.

Trevor excelled at this.

And you're right, Max.

Borrowing Trevor Nelson's mic grave on Christmas Day is a goddamn good story.

He's right.

It is a good story.

People might be bored of it.

If David, if you had borrowed a neutra bullet from Annie Mac on New Year's Eve, it's a good story.

You can't say it isn't.

My favorite peak mundanity moment in this podcast is when the guests as they invariably do say

yeah i actually had a very dull day yesterday and we both go yes because we don't want a day where they you know swam under a waterfall or whatever Trevor McDonald, according to Miles Butt, is discussed in four different episodes, but not in the Dara one.

There you go.

Once again, you're lying a bit like you did about your shoulder pain.

And I can't remember.

I'm too tired to remember what you said, David.

But now we can check on it.

What are the four episodes where Trevor McDonald has come up?

He comes up almost as much as Ernest Shackleton.

We should have a chart, shouldn't we?

So, Gary Lineker episode.

Esther Menito, he gets a mention.

Okay.

Ivor Graham's episode, he gets a mention.

And Midweek Madness Bonus Ep 23, he gets a mention.

Okay, good stuff.

Well done, Trevor.

You're up there.

Keep pushing, Trevor, and you can get to the heights of Shackleton.

Wait, not a bad future game we could play.

What non-guest has been mentioned the most?

Shackleton's going to be a hard booking.

We'll have to exhume him from South Georgia Island, I believe.

That's where he is.

Feels a lot of effort, doesn't it?

What are you doing down there, lads?

Nothing?

We've got a podcast.

What?

SB says, good morning, team.

After hearing about DOD's adventures putting his railing back together, I was inspired to write in.

Of course you were.

Who wasn't?

I am a regional sales manager for a well-renowned Belgian chemical company covering the east of Spain.

I won't mention the name of the brand as we don't accept free advertising.

Unlike Bold, every other company in the world that you guys seem to mention on the show, we really haven't worked out advertising on this one.

I would love to donate some polymer adhesive for David's restoration needs, as I believe the high instant tack quality and flexibility once dried will be of use in the railings war against the elements.

If you have a P.O.

box I can send it to, I'd be happy to donate.

Polymer is also great for sealing cracks and leaks, so it could come in handy to make sure that the BOC doesn't lose any volume and avoid extending the filling time to beyond 32 years.

Oh, yes, of course.

Polymering the bath.

I was wondering what the BOC was, but now we all know.

All the best.

Everything is Chobiz.

Ah, he's not called SB.

He just said everything is SB.

I don't know if he leaves his name.

Chobiz.

His name is Chobiz.

Hi, I'm Shobiz, Regional Sales Manager for a world-renowned Belgian chemical company covering the east of Spain.

Well, on this, Tombo sent me a message on the Blue Sky app.

Oh, yeah.

Tombo just said, after your last yesterday, I'm now slightly anxious about this glue also making its way onto your Wang.

Yeah, and?

I managed to keep it away.

I did get it on my fingers a little bit, but I, this time, didn't need to go to the loo because that would be a whole other episode.

Are the the railings still up when you left?

Yeah, railings are still up now.

I haven't really tested it yet.

I mean, apart from lowering yourself, how are you going to test the railing?

I will cover myself in meat and have a pack of wild dogs run toward the railing.

That's horrible way to go.

Horrible way.

As Trevor announced, horrible.

If you weren't sure, wild dogs.

It's not the way to go, guys.

P.O.

Box, keep it light, media.

P.O.

Box 81668.

London, n1p3ww send us your polymer brian writes hello i happened to be flicking through the channels last night and way way down the stations i noticed they were showing twister i was sad enough to sit through the entire end credits in the hope of seeing juan patino's name crop up if you remember of course if you rent his apartment in new york you have to say i am friends with juan patino He did the soundtrack for Twister and Lisa Loeb's.

Stay, I miss you.

Lo and behold, I was not disappointed.

See attached picture.

He has taken a screen grab.

What you doing in the middle of the night, taking a screen grab of this?

How?

Written by Lisa Loeb, produced by Juan Petino and Lisa Loeb.

So there you go.

I hope that he is now getting enough residuals from ITB2 showing the film every other day that he doesn't have to keep renting out his flat.

P.S.

Juan, clean your bath and bolt down the microwave.

Cheers, Brian.

Thanks, Brian.

It's nice, isn't it?

Yeah, I wonder if it's the same, though, for the people who have stayed in your flat in London while you're in Australia, just desperately trying to work out who this person is.

Or like through the keyhole.

Well, someone did Instagram direct message with a photo going, I'm in your flat.

I was like, that's weird.

Because, you know, they're actually, you know, the clues are there.

The clues are there.

The downstairs toilet is where I've got all the sort of guff that I got sent.

That's locked.

So they don't see that.

There are, you would be able to work it out.

And I've probably just left like a box file with all my mortgage details in it, you know, because it's just like, I can't be bothered to do it you know yeah and there are lots of pictures of me and jamie because it's our house right yeah yeah yeah well you should pixelate them yeah i probably should it's hard to pixelate them live isn't it i should go back around how do i do that i can't even do it on a screen

Charlie Sheen is an icon of decadence.

I lit the fuse and my life turns into everything it wasn't supposed to be.

He's going the distance.

He was the highest paid TV star of all time.

When it started to change, it was quick.

He kept saying, no, no, no, I'm in the hospital now, but next week I'll be ready for the show.

Now, Charlie's sober.

He's going to tell you the truth.

How do I present this with any class?

I think we're past that, Charlie.

We're past that, yeah.

Somebody call action.

Aka Charlie Sheen, only on Netflix, September 10th.

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Kate says, hi, Max, David, and Mars Bar.

I've never felt so seen.

The podcast this week was life-changing.

Much like Mrs.

Rushton, I also hate sport.

And much like Mrs.

Rushton, I'm also in a relationship with someone who loves sport.

Whether it's a trip to a cafe, a date night out for dinner, or even once at our friend's wedding reception, my partner has on many occasions decided to prop his phone up on the table and pop on some sport.

I had accepted this was my life at this point, having been with him for 13 years, and not figured out how to convince him that at a wedding reception was not an appropriate place to pop the Formula One on.

To which he replied, but the bride and groom love Formula One, so I have to watch it to keep them updated.

Yeah, you can just imagine in the speeches, can't you?

You know, do you, Becky Wilmot, take you, Thomas Aitchison, Alonzo's in Pole.

You need that, do you?

As mentioned on season three, episode six of the pod, Mrs.

Rushton made the excellent point that this is really rude.

If we were in a cafe and I put the Kardashians on, you would be like, this is ridiculous.

Incredible.

How had I not thought of this sooner?

I ran straight to my fiancé to tell him this.

And like Max, he agreed, agreed.

It was a solid argument.

Max, please pass on a massive thank you to Mrs.

Rushton.

Everything is showbiz.com.

Bujoiring.

Thanks, Kate.

Yeah, but, I mean, take, for example, if you're in England when the lionesses win the Euros.

You know, I doubt there's an episode of The Kardashians that brings...

a people together as much as a match like that.

Do you know what I mean?

Well, it's interesting because I was watching that game, but I was watching it with with headphones on the laptop because, you know, Ian gets the TV for cartoons.

And they'd gone to bed by the time the penalty shootout started.

And I said, Jamie, do you want to watch the penalty shootout?

And I said, it's the women.

And she looked at me like, she's like, I don't, you know, no.

What do you mean?

Like, it's still football.

I've no interest.

Yeah.

Hatred is not gendered here about.

Yeah.

Totally ungendered hatred.

She's like, no, I don't want to watch this shit.

Fair enough.

This is from iTunes.

Tim, David O'Doherty is my favorite stand-up comedian.

Thank you.

My daughter and and I once

that's the end of today's.

We'll be back next week.

My daughter and I once sought solace from the heat whilst at Latitude Festival and wandered into a kids' tent where David was performing.

It was surprisingly one of the best performances we ever saw.

David's latest creation, Max Rushton, is a man perennially stuck in the glory days of the 1990s.

A Brit Partridge, if you will.

Would recommend five stars.

My previous characters being Dr.

Noel Zone from the Dangerous Everywhere series.

Please stop with that.

Ronal Long from the Ronald Long Gets It Wrong books.

And then you, Max Rushdon, who have written this long, tedious backstory too as well.

All of these unnecessary character points.

Yeah, but like the guy playing Max Rushton should get an award at some point because he does it incredibly naturally, doesn't it?

You have given him license to add Lib, but you know, at the end of each episode, you're just like, listen, we went too far in that direction.

You know, the coffee thing maybe change that liam does not like the podcast david two stars yeah what's his problem he says quote i'm edgy because i swear a lot and talk about my travels in south america is that aimed at me i've never been to south america that narrows it down doesn't it because you know they're just normal countries i think you know i've been to most of those countries do i swear a lot I don't think you do at all.

I swear a bit more than you, maybe.

I felt I provided the swearing juice to this operation.

Well, Liam, we apologize, but thanks for the two stars because, you know, I don't know where the second one came from.

With that, that doesn't seem like an accurate reflection of what this podcast is.

You know, fuck's sake, when I was in Buenos Aires, I just don't think that's not really what.

All are sent as this.

Regards me.

putting a five-star review for the restaurant where I had bad service because a listener had given it a one-star review and I wanted to balance it out.

And then he deleted his one-star review, but I don't know how to delete it.

I'll come up with to delete my my five-star review.

So they've done really well out of it.

Whereas cafes I do like, I don't give five stars to.

So it really hasn't helped, you know, the world.

Banana.

She sent me this.

Diana reviewing the Outback Steakhouse somewhere.

One star.

I am absolutely livid.

My husband drove all the way to pick up our Outback order, and you people, capital letters, forgot the blooming onion.

That was the only thing I wanted.

Also, four months ago from Diana.

My fat husband ate the blooming onion in the car and lied.

I'm sorry.

And I don't know how to delete reviews.

Five stars.

So she has.

She's made it carbon neutral as well.

It's really made me rethink any five-star reviews we get for this.

And it's just people who had a terrible time listening to it, but for some reason are trying to balance out other things that are going on in their lives.

Yeah, I think so.

Should we have one more email?

From Louise in Eastbourne.

Great.

Hi, Max and David.

Firstly, thank you for turning me into the kind of person who writes into podcasts with anecdotes about themselves.

In fact, thank you for turning me into the kind of person who listens to podcasts at all.

My good friend Amelia recommended this quote-unquote pod, and now I find myself binging every episode in order to catch up to the current day.

On the subject of serendipity, last Thursday, two newish friends visited my house for the evening for a glass of wine and a chat.

One is a French language teacher, the other is a Romanian-German scholar.

For some unknown reason, the conversation found itself turning into what we do in the morning when we get out of bed.

As you can imagine, given the group, not a typical situation.

Reality began collapsing, and I had to confess why I was looking so confused and mildly alarmed, and explained to them I'd been doing nothing for the last week and a half but listening to celebrities, mostly comedians who live in Brighton, explain how they start their somewhat unencumbered days.

We had a good chuckle and thought no more about it.

Until the following evening, the German friend and I sat down for a picnic here on the beautiful Sussex coast.

I'll bring the cheeses, she declared.

And I watched as she pulled out a soft blue cheese, a block of Comter, fretting that she couldn't find the additional cheese that was to make up our somewhat small cheese board.

I took a breath, knowing what I wanted to say, but I said nothing.

But when a few moments later she victoriously pulls out the third cheese, explaining, it's goat.

My self-control broke and I found myself shouting in reply, they're just normal cheeses.

I don't know if you've ever tried to describe a podcast-based in-joke, such as listening to strangers trying to guess what has appeared on a celebrity's family Christmas cheese board, but I think I may have gone down in her intellectual and social esteem.

I look forward to the remaining episodes and finding out which

podcasters have appeared on or listened to the day before appearing on this podcast.

All the best, Louise and Eastport.

That's good.

Imagine if she then pulled out the two tubes of Aral Dite and then started to repair a railing.

And then took a bouncy ball.

Listen to things out of this Mary Poppins bag.

Bouncy ball came out.

Then a wagon wheel came out.

Then a a dog shirt and a bag came out.

Let's play they're just normal countries.

Play the jingle.

I am the one and only.

What country could I be?

I am the one and only.

Where in the world could our listeners be?

We hope the person who sang the jingle is okay.

Okay, as of when Mars Bar decided to start this game, there were six countries that have had just one listen, just one listen to the podcast.

Previous guesses.

Madagascar, Namibia, Costa Rica, Uganda, North Korea, Guyana, Northern Marianas Islands, Bhutan, Brunei, Nepal, Eswatini.

So far, none correct.

Remember, it's winner stays on.

So someone has the opportunity.

I loved it last week when you just said you don't understand games.

That really made me laugh.

god I'm now starting to fret that what if one of the countries is like America yeah you know what I mean and we've we've imagined we're more popular than we are there's only one way to find out is by people guessing all the countries Ali in East London welcome to the podcast dear David Max and producer Marsba I work for a small specialist publisher and one of my jobs is overseeing what I can only describe as one of the nation's five or six most popular podcasts about nursing recently

we're sick in the charts guys it's going well

Recently, I found myself in a quiet moment inspecting some of the more obscure audio data we have available.

And I discovered that, like the great producer Marsba, I too have access to an interactive map of the world showing how many downloads our podcast has generated in each country of the world.

Cool.

Yeah, using the entirely spurious assumption that the crossover of those who are interested in nursing and those who are interested in yesterday's is precisely one-to-one.

Yeah.

It means I have in my possession the exact list of countries that have coughed up only a solitary listen to what did you do yesterday.

a cheat code if you will for the nation's favorite geographical Quizlet so it is with complete confidence that I offer my guests for their just normal countries the U.S.

Virgin Islands

can I just say for the tape I can't hear when Marsbar plays that uh you can hear it yeah but I for some reason it doesn't come through to my headphones so when we do get a country that's right I won't go wild until David does because i can't hear miles but how many listeners in the u.s virgin islands please surprisingly high 20 in the u.s 20 islands wow we're huge we could do a gig there yeah i mean it would be an intimate gig that i'm in and also i am imagining the room where the nursing podcast

where you see the different countries that listen to it it's like moonraker where it's uh shall we go for re-entry is the end right that was my sean connery edinburgh accent accent.

Pretty good.

It's pretty good.

It might be Roger Moore, actually.

But I'm pretty sure in that film, there's a giant wall that's a map of the world with little lights on it to show where the spaceship is as it flies around.

That's what I'm imagining Marsbar has to get this information and also what the nursing podcast has to.

Yeah.

I mean, you probably can't understate how much money the sixth biggest nursing podcast in the UK has backing it, can you?

So they will have one of those interactions.

There's no doubt.

They'll be hurling money at all sorts of things.

There'll be a big room full of very expensive gold.

Le Boutin, is that it?

Lava Lamps.

Yeah.

I don't know.

And her podcast is Who Did You Nurse Yesterday?

She's nursing versions.

There's Nursing Hell is another big one.

The rest is nursing.

Guardian Nursing Weekly is the one that

a whimsical Irish guy and a proper generic presenter discuss the weekend nursing.

Transfer speculation.

They've got to go.

Nurse Jenkins has got to go from the Whittington.

She's had a terrible season.

So it's my day, isn't it?

My day.

Max Rushton.

Yes.

I have one question for you that will be followed by many other questions.

What did you do yesterday?

Okay.

Shall we start at the beginning?

5.40 a.m., everybody.

I am in bed with Ian.

Jamie comes to get me.

She says, Willie is awake.

So we swap.

Yeah.

So Jamie can get into bed with a sleeping Ian and I can get into bed with an awake Willie, which

sounds wrong.

You tell my point.

So that's a disappointing.

You know, I was asleep with a sleeping baby and now, toddler, I'm now awake with an awake baby.

But, you know, that's how the night shifts have worked.

It's the rotor I've been given.

You just accept it.

Question.

Yes, Dave.

Are we over jet lag?

I mean, we've been back for over a week now.

Yeah, I think we're over jet lag, but all the men in the house have this cough.

So that's affecting things.

Willie is currently doing what's known as a split night,

which is better than it sounds.

A split night is where he just is awake from one till three.

I would not call it split.

I just call it really fucking disappointing.

You know, anyway, we chat for casual 50 minutes.

Willie and I, we put the world to rights, you know, and that's nice.

So now, what is he saying, though?

You know, because for a chat, you're imagining, you know, transfer of information between two.

He's six months old, so he's not really saying anything.

You know, he is googling.

I'm lying him down.

I'm closing my eyes.

Occasionally, he's sort of sounding uncomfortable.

So then you have to pick him up for a bit.

So he smiles.

And then you see if you can just put him down and just hand him a bit of crepe paper or, you know, the packet of wet wipes.

Maybe he'll just eat that, chew that for a bit.

Right.

You know, so I can sort of doze yeah but you know i'm still playing a very active role in his life and you know i'll get another instagram reel saying it is just a fleeting moment embrace every second and you're like this second i'm not embracing i'll be honest i'm getting through it guys but you can't put that in a reel okay 6 30 a.m everyone's awake okay now right we are upstairs so the flat we're in is on two floors but we can't be downstairs because sylvia in the flat underneath she

doesn't really like us playing marble runs on the quite hard floor

because she's asleep in the room underneath, which is sort of fair enough.

She lives here for 10 months a year.

It's blissful, silence, and then suddenly little patter of feet and marbles rolling around are there to ruin her summer.

She's very nice.

How does Sylvia get across to you that she does not enjoy it?

Is it in the form of a little letter?

Is it in the form of a, I'm so sorry to disturb you, but just in the morning, or is it, oi, shut the fuck up screamed out a window?

So the first time we came was a year ago, and we didn't get over jet lag in the Lensbury and Teddington.

So we came straight here, and so she had two till 5 a.m.

Marble runs for two nights.

And then the owner of this place sent me a message going, the neighbor is really not happy.

Maybe you could find somewhere else.

I was like, we can't find somewhere else.

Like, what do you mean?

We met, and I can be charming, David.

So I charmed Sylvia last year.

So when we returned this year, she was very happy to see us.

She did, the message we had on Sunday, and it's the politest way anyone has told me to shut up, was

blessed day, Max.

Hope then you and your beautiful family have settled in nicely.

If you do not mind me saying, it's a bit noisy up there, smelling face.

That is so good.

It's so good, isn't it?

That is, I reply going, that is the politest way anyone has ever told me to shut up in my life.

So I would say I am like the enforcer.

I'm bringing marble runs up here.

Jamie's a bit like, this is our flat.

And I'm like, no, no, come on.

It's not really our flat.

Like the houses are close together here.

You know, it's like a block.

So, you know, she's right below us.

Let's just come up here.

Just to quote, we had Ross Noble on the podcast.

We did.

And the episode's still going.

He's still recording.

We were swapping old Showbiz.

anecdotes and it's an anecdote i don't think it's on the tape because i think we might have been talking afterwards which is Mike and Bernie Winters are playing some big venue in Glasgow, and Mike Winters comes out on stage and he's singing, and Bernie Winters enters from the back of the theater and starts shouting, you know, and so there's a heckler in the front row, a Scottish man who, when he sees Bernie enter from the back of the room, says, fuck me, there's two of them.

And I do imagine Sylvia saying this when you unleash Ian and Willie Rushdon for the first time.

She's never seen the second child.

It's exactly what she said, but she's far too polite to say it like that.

Anyway, so I'm keeping them up here.

We've got a marble run on the go.

Jamie goes downstairs to make porridge.

We are hiding hay fever banana medicine in porridge because he's rubbing his eyes a lot.

We think it's hay fever, but there's no way he's going to drink that.

So we're just hiding it in there.

And we think it's doing the job.

Question.

David.

Could we get a carpet, maybe?

I feel your hardwood floor.

No, no, no, no, no.

There is a big rug.

Since we last said, there's a big rug, but like the rug does end.

And so then if he starts throwing cars or he starts dancing, you know, and I don't want to constrain these wonderful signs of happiness and joy.

It's just better we're all upstairs.

That's my feeling.

I have some benelin, two tablespoons of benelin.

Without wanting to ruin this, another potential advertiser is absolutely rank.

Tastes like like the kind of, I don't know if you ever went on those holidays, but I went to Magaloof once and like you'd occasionally be in a bar and there'd be like a girl with a holster and like a gun of spirits and firing them into people's mouths.

And you know, I was at an age where I was like, I don't like this, but maybe I have to like this.

Maybe this is what you meant to like these things.

And it sort of like tastes like one of those.

So I have two tablespoons of that.

The Bennel and Cowboy.

That's what they have in all of the bars of Magalouf.

Exactly.

Do you remember?

Syrupy.

If it gets on your clothes, it's so sticky.

Anyway, we leave the house.

We go to Popham's nice cafe on London Fields for a coffee.

I get a long black.

It's good.

Ian has bought a jar of cars and two marbles.

So for everyone having a relaxing coffee there, it's less relaxing.

But, you know, we try and he rolls them off into the pram.

So that's got a kind of cushioning.

So that's not that loud.

He likes to put all the cups into the water.

But when we leave the cafe, I do a good job of clearing it all up.

We leave the venue as we entered it, I believe.

Do you feel that the baristas of London are more used to your picadillos, whatever that word is, your weird coffee?

Interesting because I go for a Cortado there because it works.

But the mag has got bigger since the last year.

And so

the first time Jamie ordered it, because she gets that first thing in the morning, I get a long black first thing and that went well.

She was like, this is too big.

And so she gets it three quarters now.

And that is, she's happy.

She's happy.

So that's fine.

But you know, there's some more coffee news to come today, don't you?

I do love the idea of Ian ordering, and for me, a jar of cars, please.

The cars are just filled to three-quarters, exactly the right temperature, of course.

So, we're in there for a while because, you know, by the time you've unpacked and packed everything and had your coffee, we had a while, but that's fine.

We are off some public transport.

Everybody sucks.

We've got two prams.

London Fields, no lift.

Don't need a lift, of course.

So two prams.

Ian walks reluctantly up the stairs.

I carry the other pram with Willie in it.

And I get there first and there's a train at the platform.

So I get in and I hold the doors and it goes peep beep beep beep beep and they close and I put my foot in the door and it opens.

It goes peep beep beep beep and I close and I so I do this three times commuters getting a bit flustered now but I can't split up the family.

The family jump in.

The train doesn't move.

I'm sitting there thinking, if three beep beep beep beeps means they have to come and manually check the door.

And like people are looking at me, but like the kids are cute.

So like we're doing, we're okay and it's not an underground train it's an overground so the vibe is different people are less angry the same people less angry in this train than the underground train they'll get in in about 20 minutes time no the overground that's being slightly delayed now which means the central line that meets it that's delayed there's currently people waiting in heathrow terminal three because the piccadilly line is being delayed euro star is cancelled yeah all because of this no they've cancelled all flights in and out of brazil Anyway, they've changed the name of this overland from something, I can't remember what it was called, to the Weaver Line.

So I look up what that is and there was lots of weaving done in this area.

But Ian, who's been on the train a few times so far, he now repeats what the woman says and he goes, you know, this is the Weaver Line train to Liverpool Street.

And it is indescribably sweet.

And he's telling everybody who wants to know, which is no one else on the train, but you know.

Anyway, we get to Liverpool Street.

I think there's some lifts there.

I think we're doing okay.

Brainwave.

Willie needs a nap, nap, gets in the carrier with Jamie.

So sort of strapped to Jamie.

Oh, yeah.

I fold up Ian's Pram and I put it under Jamie's Pram.

We're now just a one-pram family.

Commuters are, they don't realize how much I've saved.

The time that we've lost with the Beepbee Beeps is made up with just having one pram.

Great.

We are getting the circle line to Westminster.

So we wait a couple of trains because they're not our trains.

And then we get on the circle line.

Has Ian Rushdon been voted in as an MP?

He has.

He's going there to receive his whatever the thing thing is.

He's the youngest reform MP and we're incredibly proud of him.

And we've taught him to say, stop the boats to any stranger, which goes down really well in this part of East London.

So we're going to Westminster.

We're going to see Big Ben, everybody.

Yes.

Ian loves Big Ben.

He calls every clock he sees in Melbourne Big Ben.

Any clock that's on a sort of tower of any sort, even as tiny, is Big Ben.

So we are so excited to see how excited he is to see Big Ben.

And we get the pram and I film him and we sort of do a reveal.

We turn it around and Big Ben.

And seriously, I'm impressed.

Big Ben, if you haven't been recently.

Yeah.

Enormous.

It's big.

And yeah, it's big, literally.

Like they've named it well.

Yeah.

And he is sort of interested, but like...

He's not as excited as I was hoping.

I always thought this would be a like a call.

Wow.

Send that video to the parents.

You know, like, well, isn't this beautiful?

What a wonderful thing we've done he wants a little big ben and bus from a tit tat souvenir shop wow and there's lots of those around westminster i you know you get the vibe that most people at westminster are there to see big ben but are like what are we doing here there's just so many people no one's crossing the road when the green man goes green everyone's just no one's focused you know it's like when 20 people go for a curry and then i just drunk and someone says chicken tikki masala and no one says anything you're like come on let's let's just give the guys 10 minutes of focus here let's get this food on the plate don't just be like oh yeah that's mine come on focus there's no one no one at the crossing is focused we're different guys but there is one way we are the same and that is when too many people are getting a late night curry i assume the leadership role 100 where i repeat what the server has said and i will find out exactly where all of this is supposed to go yeah and when they come i'm like silence everybody we're doing this yeah we're getting this in we are not going to be those people where some poor guy is standing with a lamb dancer for half an hour.

And he's like, oh, yeah, it's all here.

It's mine.

Like, come on.

It is interesting that you've begat an incredibly basic tourist.

This is what Ian wants to do.

He wants a photo of himself crossing Abbey Road, like the Beatles.

Yes, yeah.

And then holding up the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

He wants to do that.

But he wants to see it.

It's great.

And then the other thing, any sort of circular thing that goes round, so like any windmill or type thing, he calls the London Eye.

So he wants to see the London Eye.

That is also big.

So that's exciting.

Now, Court, who you may remember from coming around to play in one episode of Midwick Mayhem with his partner and kids, he's in London.

Great.

Because they're moving to Berlin.

He has flown on his own with his dog on a dog special plane.

This is a plane that takes about 40 humans and their dogs in the plane.

Wow.

Can you imagine?

You don't get off the plane.

It refuels twice or three times.

You are on a plane with 30 dogs that they just all go to the toilet at the back of the plane.

I haven't asked him, I'm dared say how much does this cost you?

Because I bet it costs an absolute bomb.

He's got there early to take the dog so the dog didn't have to go in like a kennel.

Unlike Stevie Martin who just crate trains the dog.

This guy is like looking after this dog.

Wow.

Imagine business class on that flight where there's a beleaguered Air Stewart with a stick that just again, sir, shall I?

No, no.

In business class, there's just a cocker spaniel with a laptop.

I have to do this all the time.

I'm so on back and forth.

Yeah, I know.

What's the Wi-Fi?

So anyway, he said, look, it was really well done, but the worst seats were the ones right at the back of the plane.

Obviously, because that's where the dog toilet is.

But also, like the astro turf they've put out there.

And then you just pick it up.

But also because obviously when anyone goes back with their dog to take it for a shit,

it talks to all the other dogs.

They don't have a look, the lights out.

It's like when you sit next someone on a plane, you know the etiquette of when to talk and when not to.

The dogs don't have that.

So if your dog is at the back of the plane, they're constantly selling hello to other dogs who are just about to defecate.

Anyway, it's fascinating.

I did not know this existed.

No, neither did I.

Neither did I.

The low-budget sequel to Snakes on a Plane.

Dogs shitting on a plane.

There is less jeopardy.

You're right.

But I imagine actually Snakes on a Plane, the aroma would not be as bad.

I don't think, like, up 30 hours with a python, I just don't think it's not going to smell as bad.

The risks are higher.

You know, if you fall asleep and you find that it's just wrapped itself around you, or like half of you, it's in its, it's dislocated its jaws and you're in there.

That's a risk that you don't get from an Alsatian.

But anyway, he's done that.

So that's interesting.

Anyway, we go to, we see the London Eye, walk past London Eye.

There's some more carrying of prams downstairs and stuff.

And then we go to this playground.

Me and Ian go to the playground.

Jamie and Court and willie go to gail's good cafe and you can get a cortado there and i want a cortado now so i request the cortado it's good when you get it in jamie returns with a massive flat white i mean this is like a bucket of milk

and i don't think jamie is she's just i was very busy in there but she hands me the coffee as if i might drink it and i don't think she has shown the requisite oh no sorry there's nothing i could do here because that does happen i understand if it's really busy you don't have time kids blah blah blah but i needed a bit more yeah i know this isn't great.

So I have a couple of sips and I think, look,

if I drink this, I'll be disappointed.

But I also quite like just drinking a thing.

So I have a couple of sips.

Then I say, no, I'm not going to have this coffee.

It's fine.

You just hold it down.

And the Berlin hipster aeroplane dog is just like, I guess I'll have it if no one else will.

And then just dutifully laps it up.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Takes off the aeroplane socks he's been given, brushes his teeth into that tiny little tube of toothbrush.

He's not going to, my canines are massive, says this dog.

Anyway, we do a lot of playing in the playground.

We're teaching Ian, and I think we mentioned this before, you know, he's well positive trained, and we teach him a bush wee, you know, just if you need to go and there's no toilet, you can just wee in a bush.

You know, it's great advice and it lives with you forever.

But he sort of hasn't got it down pat.

So he's at the other end of the playground and there's like a wall, you know, a little wall that.

thousands of tourists are sitting on.

In the middle of the wall, Ian, you just see him standing there.

He just pulls down his shorts and his pants.

I'm like, oh, he's like standing right next to a man.

And so I sort of sprint across the playground and say, listen, you've got to go a bit He's like no I'm doing a bush week I'm like Yeah, but it can't be you can't do it into a man like that's not

Like into a bush the clue is in bush.

So we sort of push him to the railings like he wheezed through the railings onto some plants.

So that's fine

Home time back on the tube train.

It's time for Willie's big nap of the day big nap of the day.

So I'll do the first bit with the pram nap walk a nap walk.

My phone's on 0%, so I can't listen to anything.

So I'm raw dogging this walk.

How do you find those?

Fine.

Fine.

Yeah.

Happy enough with your your own thoughts at the moment?

Yeah, I don't, you know, I don't really have any thoughts.

You know, just sort of walking along.

I mean, I probably do.

I'm sort of listing things to do.

And I don't reach any existential depth.

I don't suddenly think about the meaning of life.

I'm just pushing this pram.

I'm happy that Willie's asleep.

I'm thinking I'm going to get the Cortado that I didn't get.

So I go and get that from Popham's.

It's great.

So I walk around with that coffee.

I'm happy.

And then I'm on Wilton Way and I'll see a little deli selling lunch.

And I'll have a look.

The sandwiches don't take my fancy, but there's like a Mexican box, chicken avocado, beans,

salsa, whatever.

So I think, okay, you know, I'm going to do an hour.

Jay's going to do an hour.

It's probably been about an hour.

So I put that in the pram and I walk back to our flat.

A man leaves his house with a three and a half year old and talks very loudly to me about how he's had a hair transplant.

I think he's very conscious he's had a hair transplant.

So he's just telling everybody, he's getting ahead of the game.

Like I would do if I had a big spot, I'd be like, yeah, welcome my big spots here as well.

Just to kind of like everyone knows.

So it's not like a thing people look at anymore god I've seen people with there's a horrific bit just after you get the hair transplant yeah where you've these big sort of blood blobs yeah and you've still got hair on the side you're like friar tuck

yeah that's probably where you're regretting it a tiny bit but i guess it comes good after that well he's still in the fry the last embers of the friar tuck stage and he's really keen to tell me and he's but what is he's got his daughter on his shoulders and she keeps poking him in the head and that is actually really hurting because he's just had a hair transplant so that's quite funny he's talking too loudly and willie's asleep so i sort of say you know have a good day and i slow down i get back to the flat jamie's made me lunch so i've got lunch and she's made me lunch

this is exciting so she's made a classic max lunch scrambled eggs baked beans roast tomatoes on toast.

Here's the thing.

In this flat, there's an air fryer.

We've never been air fryer people.

Always skeptical of the air air fryer.

I don't know where you're currently at, David.

Well,

my first ever encounter with an air fryer is in this apartment that we are staying in.

Oh, wow.

Have you tried anything yet?

Have you done anything yet?

No, I only moved in yesterday, and the name on the front is a now cancelled TV chef.

Really?

The Greg Wallace air fryer?

This is exciting.

It's not him.

It's one of the others.

How many cancelled chefs are there?

There's a lot of counseled TV chefs who uh ainsley's all right isn't it ainsley still okay isn't he i like ainsley sure he's okay but because i don't really know what air fryers do i'm still a rookie at this i get the impression so i'm a rookie but jamie's really got into it i'm in the impression that you could buy a chicken

and just stick it in the air fryer, shove it in in its packet and just put some full whole potatoes on it, press a button, you pull it out, and you base it on a full roast dinner with red sauce and gravy.

It's that ridiculous.

She's roasted these cherry tomatoes and they are perfect.

And it's honestly, we should get a sponsorship with them because there's nothing bad to say about an air fryer unless they're polluting, you know, the North Pole or something.

Do you think if you had an Edinburgh show that's overall pretty good but has some holes in it, you could drive a bus through, if I just put the script into the air fryer, yes, maybe put it to 20 minutes, it comes back out, it's just all beautifully written.

Put it on extra crispy and you're you're going to be flying.

Oh, Marsborough has told me which one it is.

Oh, that chef.

Yeah, of course.

Yeah, he is.

It's a just a me, who I am.

It's just a me.

Anyway.

I eat the lunch that's hot and I put this other box in the fridge.

I'll eat that later.

I probably won't eat it later.

Turns out later in the day, Jamie takes some of the stuff out to help with her chili concarni.

Okay, so then...

Ian and I, we take our bikes.

He's got a little balance bike.

I've got my one UK bike.

We take it to Balance Bike Park, which is in London Fields.

It's actually Chin-Up Park.

It's an interesting bit where they've got like five chin-up bars, like a community of incredibly muscly people just constantly doing chin-ups, like on rotation.

Whatever hour of the day, there's just somebody there playing some music, doing chin-ups, or like just holding their whole body up for like 20 minutes horizontally.

And you sort of turn up with your dad barred thinking, I've got to do something about this.

I am an incredibly fit man, as you well know from the way that I dominate the world of cycling and football in the park.

However, the one thing that has left me since my peak fitness era of probably early 20s is the chin-up.

Like I was never great at it, but I could grind out a couple.

Whereas now I just hopelessly hang there for maybe 15 seconds till my body starts to shake.

Like, you know, when your six-pack actually starts to vibrate.

Yes.

Oh, I know the feeling.

Within the confines of everything that's covering it.

I mean, you need to be able to do one chin-up in case you're fall off the cliff and you've got your two hands there.

So true.

Yeah, I think about it in terms of Luke Skywalker.

I think at the end of Empire Strikes Back, he is hanging to a girder.

Yeah.

And I think the Millennium Falcon might come and rescue him.

I've always thought that for that reason, I think he's had one of his hands chopped off and he's hanging by one.

Just in case that ever happens to me, it's something that you need to.

So all the people in China Park have two hands.

But anyway, it's also got some little bumps you can cycle over.

So Ian's doing it on his balance bike.

I'm on my big road road bike with a child's seat.

It's not designed for these, but it's still, we're poodling about.

We're having a great time.

Then I'm thinking, you know, this is an Instagram reel.

Here we are, just father and son cycling about.

I'm having a great time.

And he says, at some point, he says, I love cycling around with you, Dada.

And you're like, oh, come on, man.

This is good.

This is good stuff here.

We do all the parks.

There's three parks, sort of playgrounds.

There's this, there's one we call Spinner Park.

Then we end up in Normal Park.

Oh, we're at the swings.

Yes.

Hang on.

We got a good reel because normally when we discuss Instagram reels, it's as discussed on this podcast today.

You've got the one which is, it's great having young children because they're not going to be young forever.

Whereas your version of that is, this is awful, and it's gone on for years.

Then you've got, let's reveal Big Ben to you.

And he's just like, oh, yeah, it's just like any other clock, really.

But you actually get a good one of

dads having fun in the park.

Great.

Yeah, this is a good one.

This is great.

We're, you know, I could put this out and going, dad, life.

I love dad life.

Dad, dad, dad, dad, dad.

And it would get so many.

And people were were like, oh, this guy, what a guy this is.

We end up at the swings.

The hair transplant guy's there.

I thought he might be confused because the child that I had is now three years older from like an hour ago, but like he doesn't recognize me.

That's fine.

I don't need to talk to him about his hair transplant anymore.

Ian's on the swing.

I find that he quite likes if I just lie on the floor under the swing on the kind of warm rubber and he can just sort of kick me in the stomach softly.

And we have a long conversation about how you don't want to be the floor because you'd be flat.

But it does mean I can sort of have a bit of a lie down but also entertaining him so that's really good he wants to go home go home a very old friend school friend of mine ellie comes over she likes the podcast she's a bit behind so she's catching up before the live show she comes over with her daughter who's five and they play which is great now i'm on my bike i'm cycling to the shard alone whoa so jamie and willie and ian and ellie and her daughter are in the flat and i'm cycling to the shard i've got a big meeting with the head of talk sport whoa there's been so many london landmarks in this.

This is like when Jack Reacher goes to London.

It's like, meet you 4 p.m., the shard.

And then we will go to the MM shop on Leicester Square.

Trocadero to play LaserQuest.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, so we meet and I've taken the wrong phone, but it's also my Wi-Fi works on the Australian phone, so that's good.

I'm downstairs.

I need to talk to you about E.

Sims because I'm wasting money with two phone.

I don't need two

deals, but I just haven't got around to it.

He comes downstairs.

We don't don't go in.

We go to Prep.

He gets a cup of tea.

I get a five pound green juice.

He pays for it.

Maybe the company pays for it.

Thank you, Tor.

We sit on a bench outside, just like two old Joe's.

He loves the podcast, but as I explained, it's not my day because I didn't think it was until later that day.

You say it's my day.

And I remember it's my day.

So I said, none of this will be documented.

And now it's going to be documented.

We talk about my internet speed from the shed in Melbourne and the kit that I want him to pay for and the kit that he wants me to pay for, which is the same kit.

I ask for more money.

I ask for shorter shows.

I say my shows are the best ones.

I say, I want more of my shows on social media.

And he says, we'll see what we can do.

But, like, we get on famously, so it's fine.

We've had these conversations before.

Wow.

He will be very surprised, I would imagine, that these contract talks.

That will be put on.

Yeah.

Do they make you do a medical then?

Does he make you sprint up and down and check your heart?

I do the bleep test.

Yeah.

I do the bleep test between London Bridge Station and the Shard.

I had to run up the shard and down 15 times.

Fortunately, if you look at the rest of the talk sport presenters, you know, even though I'm not in the best Nick and it feels like I've got bronchitis, I'm probably still in the leading pack of running up the shard.

There is something that I can't talk about that could excite people who like me talking about how tired I am.

That's all I'm saying.

But I can't give any more information.

What?

That doesn't make any sense to me.

What could excite...

Wow.

Have we got a sponsorship deal with Emma Mattresses or something that I'm about to find out?

No, this is a talk sport conversation.

It's not a what did you do yesterday?

But he does like the podcast, so you know, he says hello.

Can't believe you've never been on talk sport.

Wants to get you on at some point.

Oh, yeah.

I don't know anything about sport.

I just.

Okay.

Just come on one of my shows and we'll chat.

So we have a good chat.

I say thanks very much.

Get on my bike, cycle back.

Everyone's still there.

We play until 5 p.m.

And his daughter has got a great soundtrack on her little Yoto.

It's like a tiny hi-fi.

Bit of Paul Young, a bit of an excess.

George Michaels.

Good stuff.

Is she 40?

She's five.

Yeah, she's just playing virgin radio, basically, from about 10 years ago.

They go home, dinner, bed, bath time, takes a while.

Yeah.

Willie isn't tired for some reason.

So I take over, trying to get Willie down with a new tactic, total failure.

Jamie comes in, saves the day.

Great.

Ian is being, I mean, mischievous is a polite way of putting it.

I've got him in the room.

He kept trying to get out of the room.

I'm holding the door.

It's just desire.

Once this happens, it's basically I've lost him.

Because once you're holding the door and he's trying to open the door and he's yelling, you're just like, Okay, we're all done here.

The days of I love cycling around the park with you are gone.

Now it's like it's bedtime.

He's like, But I don't want to go to bed.

And I'm like, I don't have an answer for this.

I've got to learn how to discipline my children.

Look at this reel from when we were friends three hours ago.

Yeah.

This is the point where you just scream, Sylvia, get up here, please.

So Jamie comes in, she solves that.

I go downstairs.

I finish writing a column about the start of the Football League season.

I do the pod script.

Jay comes downstairs with one of those exhales of, I have to do a lot in this house.

She's right.

And I feel bad.

Anyway, I'm now going out for dinner.

So,

I know.

Can you believe it?

I get on my bike, cycle to Exmouth Market.

We wanted pizza, but there's no room there.

So having burgers, I'm with my university friends, Anna, Beth, and Rolls and Tash.

Wow.

Most interesting thing is that Rolls is doing a screen acting course.

He is really good.

And he was really good back at university, but for various reasons.

that are not mine to say.

He couldn't pursue his acting dream.

Great.

He was 20.

And now we watch his tape and it's really good.

And I really genuinely think that he's got it.

Yes.

You know, go on rolls.

He also told me about kangaroos because he said, David might be interested in this, that they can, in terms of lowering yourself into the bath, they can ingest their testicles.

If you could do this, you could lower yourself in, but your balls wouldn't be the first to hit the bath.

I've heard the ninjas can as well, but I just, I don't seem to have any muscle down there to, if I am going to try and build it up, like doing chin-ups, maybe I need to hang myself from that bar by my balls and then try and tug my whole body up and down.

I'll go and ask any of those guys if they can ingest their testicles

as soon as we've finished.

The waiter might be the best waiter I've ever had.

He looked like, if you picture a strong man from the 20s, you know, bald moustache, big trousers.

I see Eastern European guy.

He's really good.

Full of joy.

It just brings so much joy.

It's infectious.

He does the remembering the whole order, which I'm always skeptical about.

Yeah.

Because as he goes off, having remembered everything, someone stops him to ask him something else.

I'm like, how can you remember all this stuff?

But he remembers everything.

It comes out quickly.

I have a burger, fries, slaw.

He recommends the brisket crispy wonton, which is a bit overkill.

You don't need that just before you have a burger.

I'll be really honest.

And we get a rare bit to crump it.

Also an acid.

Nice.

And have three bottles of Camden Hells.

Cycle home.

The day bed is free.

I get in the day bed.

It's the end of the day.

Wonderful.

We have, for the tape, raced through the end of the day slightly because Jamie has returned with the Ian and Willie and there is a crisis, which means I must extricate myself from this.

Get out of here.

I've never said this before.

Finally, sorry, David, finally.

If you remember the long-running quiz, you've had one guess.

I need a comedian and a footballer.

Oh, my goodness.

John Joe Shelvey and

Terry Alderton.

Incorrect, but not terrible guesses.

David, you do the end bit.

I've got to go.

I've never said this before.

Max, leave the podcast.

I'll sail this ship alone.

It's been great having having you here.

Oh, there's such a temptation now that Max has left to just do an hour on my own right here.

I'm here.

I'm here.

Putting this bang to rights.

If you loyal listeners would like to get in touch with our podcast, this is how.

To get in touch with the show, you can email us at whatdidyoudo yesterdaypod at gmail.com.

Follow us on Instagram at yesterdaypod.

And please subscribe and leave a review if you liked it on your preferred podcast platform.

And if you didn't, please don't.

A wonderful day.

I think we could all agree.

I'm still here.

Max

has visited many of the London landmarks.

And although my day would have been more exciting, I don't say this often, but I did open it just because you're on your own.

My show in Edinburgh.

yesterday.

We could have really gone through the excitement, the ups and downs of that.

Went for a Mexican meal afterwards, having flown over on the plane that morning, etc.

But what we got was another great day from the life of Max and Co.

And we will be back with a special guest this Sunday and another one of these next Wednesday.

Wherever you are,

have a lovely week and remember, everything is showbiz.

Yes, everything is showbiz.

Sometimes the hardest part is just starting.

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Hello, Max Rushton here.

You might remember me from Series 9, Episode 2 of Parenting Hell.

I'm here to tell you about Dog by the Bakery Door, the debut children's book by author Jamie Bruce.

Dog by the Bakery Door is a charming story of the magical things a little boy sees on a normal trip to get a coffee with his mum.

Perfect for newborns, three-year-olds, six-year-olds, all children.

Just Google Dog by the Bakery Door.

Here's a review from my three-year-old son.

Dog by the Bakery Door.

I have this book.

Full disclosure: the author might be his mother and my wife, but even more reason to buy it.

She is to live with us under baby 247 and has sacrificed her career for mine while also being an amazing mum to two boys.

Thank you, goodbye.