Funn Fragments: Rolo

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Fun fragments of wooden overcoats.

Eric finds a canine companion in Rolo by Chris and Jen Sugden.

George!

I can't carry this coffin by myself, you know?

That's what I pay you for!

Oh, never mind.

You can do this, Radiator.

Willpower.

That's all it is.

Let nothing

break

your concentration.

Stop!

Stop!

Roll!

Get off!

Down!

Get off!

Get off me!

Rolo, Rolo, Rolo, get down, boy!

Rolo, Rolo, Rolo!

There we are, there we are!

Come on!

Oh morning, Rudyard.

I see you've got my new friend, Rolo.

Did I mean to say this slaughtering beast is yours?

Yep, I was just taking him for a walk.

He loves his walkies, don't you, Rolo?

Don't you, Rolo, don't you?

Yes, you do, you love your walkies, you're good, boy.

Well, do let me know how this conversation turns out.

If you'll excuse me.

No, no, no, Rudyard, watch this, watch this, watch this.

Rollo, paw, paw.

Rollo, paw.

Paul?

Paw.

Never mind.

Anyway, he's very friendly, aren't you?

Aren't you the best boy?

Aren't you?

Oh, this is why you come in.

Chapman, what the hell has happened to you?

Why have you done this?

Well, he belonged to the late Mr.

Hancock.

After the funeral, the family said they didn't want him, so I thought, why not take him in myself?

I mean, if there's enough room at Chapman's for a cafe, bowling alley, indoor adventure park, then settle down, Rolo.

A dog, after all, is a man's best friend, and I could do with having a chum about the place.

Rolo, no, no, Rolo.

Sorry about this, Richard.

I'm not quite sure what's gotten into it.

Rolo!

Get down!

Oh, good boy, good boy, Rolo.

Good boy.

It's all about positive reinforcement.

That's absurd.

Now, if you don't mind, I'm showing a coffin to Miss Scruple in about half an hour.

Why?

She's planning her funeral, obviously.

After all these years, I've finally managed to.

What is it?

He's brought you a stick.

Well, I don't want it.

Now, as I was saying to Miss Scruple on the telephone.

Yes.

All she really needs is somebody who will get her

body in the

body in the

coffin, the coffin, the coffin, in the ground on what?

What is this?

What do you want?

I think he wants you to throw the stick for him, Which is funny because he's never shown the slightest right!

Fetch!

Bit of interest.

In the ground on time.

There!

Anyway, good luck with the dog chapman.

I won't keep you.

Would you like a hand with that coffin, Rudy?

I can manage, thank you.

If you could just...

Now what?

He must want you to throw it again.

To find anything to get rid of him.

Fetch!

Wow.

He really does seem to like that stick, doesn't he?

You alright, sir?

Eric?

Good morning, Georgie.

Georgie, I've been yelling out to you for hours.

Well, that was silly.

I've been at the mare's all morning.

Just help me get the coffin inside.

No problem.

I've got great core strength.

Hey!

Who are you then?

Yeah, that's Rolo, my new dog.

The buzz off, damn you.

You want to properly train a dog like that, Eric.

Earn his respect.

Otherwise, he'll walk all over you.

Don't worry, Georgie, I think I can handle him.

Yeah, but listen, with Timmy, I really don't know.

Thanks, but honestly, me and Rolo are already so in sync with each other.

You know, it's like we both know what the other one's thinking.

Give it a few weeks and I might make him a business partner.

Um

what are these?

They're slippers.

That's thoughtful of him.

But they're

my slippers.

Well.

Not according to Rolo, they're not.

Rollo.

Rolo.

Rolo, come here.

Come.

Not great at following orders, eh, Ari?

Yeah, it's early days.

I haven't taught him the basic commands.

You mean like, sit?

Oh.

And.

Down.

Oh.

And roll over.

Yes.

And.

Somersault?

Yes, well, I was probably asking a bit much there.

Still, though.

Eric, I think your dog loves Rudyard.

Good boy.

He's certainly taken a shine to you.

Don't feel bad, Chapman.

I'm sure he'll come to tolerate you, as we all have.

Maybe, but I I wouldn't be a deserving friend to man's best friend if I forced him to be my friend when he clearly prefers someone else.

Perhaps you should have him.

Can I keep the slippers too?

No.

Rudyard can't have a dog.

Why not?

Well, maybe he's just what we need here.

Shake things up a bit.

He hates shaking things up.

That's not true.

You threw my maracas into the sea.

That was completely different.

Rollo here could comfort our clients, cheer them up, and serve as a reminder of my superior dog handling abilities.

There it is.

It's not a competition, Rudyard.

I I know it isn't, but I'm still one.

Look, give me one good reason why I shouldn't keep a dog here.

Madeline will kill you.

She doesn't have to know.

Hello, Madeline.

Of course he isn't dangerous.

Besides, Georgie could just build you a tiny suit of armor.

Problem solved.

We are not keeping a dog here, and that's final.

But Rolo can't go with Chapin.

He hates him.

Don't you?

Good boy.

What about Miss Scruple?

That's my booking Chapin.

Yes, but there's nothing wrong with her.

She might just be lonely.

In fact, if she had Rollo for company, she wouldn't feel the need to book a funeral at all.

That's a good idea, Eric.

Thank you, Georgie.

But I'll take Rollo round to hers now.

I may have lost a friend, but I'll have brought happiness into someone's life.

He's stealing my dog.

Shut up, sir.

Come along, boy.

Enjoy yourselves.

You did the right thing, sir.

We can always get you another pet.

Something simpler, like a goldfish.

A goldfish?

No, too judgmental.

Come on, Georgie.

Let's shift the coffin back to the workshop.

Rolo was written by Chris and Jen Sugden and was performed by Felix Trench as Rudyard, Tom Crowley as Eric, and Kira Baxendale as Georgie, with additional voices by Holly Campbell and Bertie Goddard, who is a dog.

The script was edited by David K.

Barnes, and the production manager was Elizabeth Campbell.

Music composed by James Whittle.

The program was recorded at the Coach House studio and was directed and produced by Andy Goddard and John Wakefield.

The Fable and Falling Network, where fiction producers flourish.

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