133. Love Bombing Lies, Addiction To Being Hurt, & Being Blocked By An Ex

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So this episode came out a day late. You know how I always say recommit and figure it out? Yeah, I got tested with that because I'm on tour right now and I brought my podcast equipment with me to make sure I could record and not miss an episode because I like to hit every Sunday and come to find out while I was traveling the equipment was damaged so I had to rebuy some things and I'm very irritated about it but I did what I had to do I have one day at home back in my apartment and I had to spend it buying equipment and recording an episode so hi when I say I love you I mean it I put my ass behind it but this week going to do What Would Leo Do? Because like I said, I'm on tour.
I'm coming to Florida this week. So if you're watching this when it comes out, my three shows in Florida.
First is Orlando, then we go to Miami, and then we go to Tampa. And then I go to more places.
I'm almost done with the tour. There's nine shows left.
So if you want to get a ticket, the link will be in the description where you can buy one. I'm going to a lot of places.
You can look up where I'm going to be, when I'm there and i'll see you if you get a ticket but this week we're doing what would leo do so let's just jump into it i'm excited these are my favorite episodes so the first person wrote in and said love bombing no extra context no extra nothing what would leo do love bombing this is the perfect time for someone to ask me about this because love bombing is a real hot topic on social media recently. And I think a lot of people have it wrong.
A lot of people think things are love bombing when they're not. So this is going to hurt for anybody who's thinking that they're getting love bombed.
People will treat you a certain way when they're getting to know you. Some people pretend to be something they're not and then switch.
That's absolutely love bombing. We get that.
But a lot of people fail to take into consideration. Some people, while they're getting to know you, act like they like you and that is how they care for someone.
And then they don't just flip for no reason because they're trying to manipulate you. Sometimes people figure out they don't really like you or they realize they're not into you like that or they lose interest.
And it doesn't mean that they love bombed you. It means they lost interest and that's what changed their behavior.
A lot of people go the manipulative route and paint themselves in a certain light to get you to like them and to get you attached to them. That's actual love bombing when it's a manipulation tactic.
But I see a lot of people messing it up and assuming everyone's just trying to manipulate them. You have to entertain the idea that maybe they just lost interest in you.
I know that's so bad to say and I know it's hard to hear, but just because someone treated you good and then stopped treating you good, they could be love bombing you or they could have lost interest. You can assess that for your situation how you want it.
I just wanted to give my two cents on this because everybody's running around saying love bombing this, love bombing that. Babe, you really think like you on such a high horse that people couldn't just lose interest in you? Maybe not everyone's just trying to manipulate you and get you attached to them oh my god that kind of seems rude but like it's the truth you wanted my take on it so that's it as that's the situation some people are trying to manipulate you and some people just lost interest and it doesn't mean they love bombed you they just don't fucking like you so that's what leo would do it's assess it for what it is all right next person wrote in, I'm going to sum it up because it was really long.
They basically said they keep having their partner fuck up, like their partner keeps doing things wrong, and they're tired and they feel bad for pointing it out. And this is a topic I've considered doing an entire podcast episode on, which is an addiction to being hurt by people and how your brain will find comfort because it's a subconscious manipulation tactic to get people to act the way that you want.
When you constantly see people hurting you and doing things wrong and letting you down, it gets exhausting and it becomes uncomfortable and it's just like pain everywhere you look. But's not disappointing you everyone's not fucking up and your partner is probably sick of hearing it feeling like they can't do anything right but you have to see what you get by seeing how people do things wrong or do things bad with situations like this with a partnership and in a relationship if you just keep seeing what's wrong, something that I used to deal with, and I had to break this in myself, is being addicted to being hurt by people because I liked how people treated me when they were making up to me.
And your brain will kind of see, okay, if people treat me good when they're making up to me, your brain is going to constantly look for things they're doing they need to make up for. So what you're going to be trained to see is how they're fucking up and how they're doing things wrong.
So you have something to hold over them. It's like you get the upper hand and you get to put your foot on their neck because they're trying to prove themselves to you.
But the issue is you will confuse liking this person for who they are with liking how they treat you when they're making up for something. So do you like how the person treats you when it's 50-50 when it's equal, and they're just being genuine with you? Or do you only like them when they're behaving in a way that they do when they're making up for something, and when they're trying to get back in good graces with you.
That's something to clock yourself on and that's something you can get trapped in mentally and it was a bitch for me. It was a real pain in the ass but that's something to become aware of is are people doing things wrong all the time or do you benefit by seeing everything going wrong because it gives you something to hold over their head and it puts them in a lower position and you like how they treat you when they're trying to fight back up

and get back to neutral that's just something to reflect on and look for because it like i said turns painful when all you see is how people do things wrong and how they do things bad and everybody's a disappointment most people aren't but if you benefit from this dynamic you will be blind to seeing what they do right because you benefit by having them in a lower position when they're making up for things. Does that make sense? Okay, cool.
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Additional terms apply. Okay, the next person said, oh god, I'm not sure how it is in the male gay community, but with women, there's a stereotypical role that a mask slash stud is expected to fill.
Acting hard and emotionless pretty much, and not being expressive. Basically like a man.
I tend to suppress my actual personality to fit in that stereotype so i could be more socially accepted as a mask pointers on how to be myself without shame men are just like you they're all needy they're all bitchy and they're all whiny especially straight men straight men behind closed doors do not fit the stereotype that they all portray outside in public. Straight men are the biggest baby back bitches.
They like to be coddled and babied and tucked in at night. And they like to be like a child.
And a lot of women, straight women in today's society, feel like men are babies because that's how they act. Outside, you see a certain stereotype.

Behind closed doors who people are actually dating is the little toddler in these men.

So I don't want you to feel like there's this pressure to be a certain way.

What people like the most is when you have duality and you have contrast.

Like me, for example.

I'm not the typical gay by any means.

I don't do any of the stereotypical shit. I don't act the same way as most gay people do, like gay men.
I don't fit the stereotype and I don't try to force myself to. You will lose yourself when you try and force yourself to be something that you're not.
People are going to like the fact that you're expressive and you're not the typical stud who's always trying to be a hard ass. A lot of lesbians are uncomfortable to be around because you feel how hard they're trying to put on a certain image.
My advice is never try to put on an image. Be who you are, do what you wanna do, express yourself and be fun.
That aspect of your personality is what people are going to cherish and appreciate the most. People don't typically like the stereotypes and a lot of people feel uncomfortable and a lot of people can feel and sense when you're forcing something or trying to control perception so cut that shit out what you have to offer as fully being you as a lesbian is what is going to get you loved and appreciated when i was trying to be a certain way and not just be how i am it was a shit show it was just weird and everybody felt it and i.
And I felt very disconnected. As soon as you embrace the duality in you, you can be a masculine lesbian, but not have to be a straight man.
You don't have to take on those characteristics. You can fully be yourself and you don't want to fit a stereotype because those people are replaceable.
People who fit in and people who go by the societal norms of doing things a certain way, nothing special about them. They're a dime a dozen.
Was that the right term? Like there's a lot of them. Like, is that the right term? A dime a dozen? Is that how you use that? Like there's plenty to pick from.
You want to be the needle in a haystack. You want to be the little special one who doesn't follow what everybody else does.
You don't want to be a follower.

You want to be yourself and make your own mold of who you are and how you are. And you're allowed to express yourself and have your sexuality be what it is and not have one dictate the other.
Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I have to wear makeup and wear rainbow shit and be flamboyant as hell. I'll siss it up with you here and there, but I don't cater my entire personality and force it to be what other people are typically in the gay community.
One thing I don't engage in is hookup culture. I don't like that shit.
That's my personal thing, but you're faced with a choice. You can force yourself to not be yourself and go by what gets you accepted.
You're never going to feel good in life. You're never going to find real connection.
You're never going to like yourself. That's the thing.
Base how you are and who you are and what you express and don't express. Base that on how you feel about it and if you like yourself and not are people going to like this about me? I'm trying to be what everybody wants me to be.
That's never going to get you nowhere. Trying to be what you're not will never get you loved.

And if you do get love for it, you're never going to feel loved because it's not you.

It's like putting a wall in front of yourself and this shell gets love.

You don't get it.

It doesn't penetrate through the shell.

You don't feel it.

So my advice is don't feel trapped and limited by feeling like you have to be a certain way.

You can be very tough and be a masculine person and still be expressive and be vulnerable and all that people know with me i'm very expressive i'm very emotional i'm very vulnerable i'm also a fucking hard ass sometimes i'm a little rude but i also take care of people and i love people i'm very gentle and i'm very loving and caring toward people but at the same time on the flip i'll fuck your shit up in two seconds and I have no qualms about it. Things don't discount each other.
The fact that you're vulnerable does not make you less masculine. And the fact that you're gentle does not make you less strong and less tough.
So throw that out of your head. Because I tried to do this whole thing.
I did this whole little dance for a while. Just be you because that's what people are going to like.

They're not going to like this little fake facade.

And you don't want to ever put on a facade too long because you start to feel trapped behind a wall of glass.

You feel like you can see out, but no one can see in because it's stained from their side.

You fucked it up.

You know what I mean?

Like you put on an image too long and you feel just like trapped inside of it.

You feel like you're like riding around in your body.

Like what the hell? No one can see in. No one can see what I actually feel or think or want.
No one can see me. You'll feel invisible.
You'll feel behind a sheet of glass that no one can see in. So don't do that to yourself.
Be you and take pride in the fact that you have the balls to go against the grain and stand out. Standing out is a good thing.
It comes with a rejection, but it comes with a way more intense level of appreciation and your value will be recognized as soon as you act in line with it. Stop hiding it.
The way that you express things, the way you communicate is valuable. Like me, if I was just a hard ass and I only wanted to be perceived as tough, I wouldn't be sharing what I share, but the way that I communicate is appreciated.
Does that make sense? Like don't hide it. Don't hide it at all.
Express yourself truly because the way that it is expressed through the vessel you're in is going to hold a lot of weight. It's going to be different.
It's going to be perceived way better. And it's a special thing.
So don't cover that up. Don't like dull out your life and like turn everything gray because you feel like you have to be a certain thing.
Be you. think okay the next person said how do you lead more with your heart rather than caring so much about physical appearance achievements etc i want to go back to leading with my heart my biggest piece of advice for situations like this kind of grounding yourself and what really matters and having perspective is think back to the nights where you were alone in pain, crying on the floor, like, like ugly crying.
And you had nothing that would comfort you. You had no one.
Think back to when you questioned if you were going to make it through certain things. And no matter how dark it got, think back to it.
Because when you were crying on the floor, what mattered then? Did your physical appearance matter?

Did being a different weight matter in that moment?

Would that have fixed the pain that you felt?

Would having more money have fixed that pain that you felt?

No.

All these superficial things are nice in theory, but if you really want perspective about what

really matters, it's humans.

It's connection.

It's love.

It's all the things that we are and all the things that you can create and share that

you cannot buy.

It's a, it's connection, it's love. It's all the things that we are and all the things that you can create and share that you cannot buy.
It's things you have to create and things you have to be. So that's my best advice for leading with your heart is remember those moments and remember what would have comforted you when you were at your lowest point, questioning if you were gonna make it through things.
What mattered then? And live your life based off of that, not appearance and money and weight and getting caught up in all that shit. You can care about it.
You can definitely prioritize it. It's important to make sure you look how you wanna look and you feel how you wanna feel and everything's going good.
You make money, you're okay. That's all important too.
But if you're in a place where you feel lost and you don't feel like you can leave with your heart or you don't know how to,

think back to that and prioritize those things

that would have helped you way down deep

in that pit of pain.

Use that to lead your life for a little bit

and then bring back in the prioritization

of the other things, the superficial things,

because they're nice, they're enjoyable. But everybody knows at the end of the day, none of it matters.
Like, if it comes down to defending someone I care about, I don't care what I have on me. All the jewelry, I'll rip it off.
I'll get my face smashed. I don't care.
The physical shit means nothing. I'll throw all the money away to protect anyone I care about.
That's what matters. And you

know that you have that, but that's just the perspective that will help you tap into leading with your heart and figuring out what to prioritize. So just think back to those moments.
What would have made you feel better when you was ugly crying on the floor and make those things more important than buying stupid shit or freaking out about the way you look. You're fine.
All all right the next person said how to win a court case um the thing i learned about representing myself in court a few times and winning is if you are fighting a legal battle it does not matter the angle you fight from with what is morally right and wrong and who's a better person and who's not. A lot of people in court and in law shit try to paint the other person in a bad light to try and get under the emotions of the judge.
What the judges are looking for is their screening for laws that have been broken and damage that has been caused by breaking the law. If you can prove something was unlawful, that is the goal.
That's how you win a court case is to show damages or show a law has been violated that requires punishment. That's the thing you fight.
You don't fight the emotions. You don't fight who was better morally, who cared more, who did more, who went.
It's about what was legally right and wrong. There's room for emotions in court you really will see how corrupt the system is and how pathetic it is because there's no logic and reason it's black and white so you need to paint it black or paint it white don't get it colored up gray trying to bring emotions and feelings into it leave that shit out out of it.
If you can prove a law was broken

or something was done that was unlawful,

you will win.

Fight that.

Keep that in the back of your head.

Don't get caught up in anything else.

Prove what needs to be proven.

Feelings don't matter in court.

Remember that.

All right, the next person, we're getting deep.

They said, how do I deal with feeling

like I have no real purpose for life

and I'm just living for the people I love? That's okay sometimes. I don't want you to stress out and freak out for feeling like you don't have any reason to live but for other people.
If that's what you need to keep going for a little bit, let it be that. Feeling like you have to just be here for others is something that I've experienced.
Any reason that can keep you going, any purpose to stay here is a purpose. Let it serve its purpose by being here and being useful.
You will experience new things. You will change.
You will learn new shit. You'll have new perspectives.
You will have new desires come up and you will feel a great sense of purpose eventually. If you just need any sense of purpose, use what's there.
Living for other people serves you right now. Use that.
Let that save you. It will guide you out of its embrace once you are ready for it.
Sometimes you just have to find any reason to keep going. And that's a perfectly fine one of living for other people.
Like I've said, I've experienced it myself. I've experienced it before I got like fame and all this shit.
And I experienced it again after I started to blow up and like have people start to care about me. I had to live for you guys at certain points you didn't even know.
And that can be okay. That used to stress me out a lot too.
Like, oh my God, I need a purpose. I need this.
I did like freaking out. What you need to keep in your head is all you need is to keep going.
So what you need to feel like you're doing it for will change. It will ebb.
It will flow. It's going to grow.
It's going to alter itself by itself. So don't stress too much about finding the right purpose.
Any purpose to keep going will lead you to the greater purpose. So remember me saying, do not stop and don't freak out that you feel like you just have to live for other people right now.
If that's enough reason for you to stay, stay. You're not meant to go yet.
You need to stick around longer and be happy you have at least that because there are points that might come where you're begging for any reason and just ride the wave. There's always a reason to stay and don't critique it.
Don't get mad about it. Sometimes you just got to live for other people for a little bit.
But you will come back to you and you will find that purpose and you'll find that little motivation again. It's coming.
So don't stress. Just ride the wave.
All right. Next person said, Dear Leo, the guy I was in a relationship with left me because of my traumas.
I was in a relationship with a narcissist who abused me. He knew my ex betrayed me in ways but when i told him the whole story about the abuse even though i healed he said it was too much for him i was devastated and i've been struggling since three months now to accept it because i am a victim in my former relationship and now he punished me for my wounds and before that everything seemed perfect and he used to say very often that he is there for me and will always protect me what would leo do for someone to say you're too much for them it's okay what they're admitting is they're not strong enough to be with you and that's fine or you don't line up with what they want out of his life or out of a partner.
Also, you have to look at what you're reflecting to them and what is being challenged in their perception of reality. When I say challenge in their perception of reality, an example for me is a lot of people say that when I talk about my past, I'm lying.
And it's a typical thing. And I give people the grace of their ignorance when they say I'm lying about things.
Because if you actually pay attention to the things that I talk about from my past and things that I've been through, to entertain the possibility that what I've been through is true, for most people, it will wipe out any sense of safety they have in this world. So to understand what I'm saying about what I've experienced causes such a rupture, people have two options.
They can choose to shut their eyes and not see it and say, you're lying, or they can face their entire reality being shattered. Like when I talk about the justice system not being for you and people are not going to really help you and you only have yourself to rely on most of the time.
Shit is set up for you to succeed shit is not set up for right or wrong especially court there's so much corrupt just i don't want to speak too much on it but the court system is corrupt politics are corrupt as hell everything is corrupt nothing is actually looking out for the best interest of you and to entertain that thought makes you very unstable and very shaky with going forward if you didn't know that before. So my example is that because people have to say that I'm lying or they have to face the fact that the world they live in is not as safe as they thought.
And they don't know how to deal with that level of unsafety. They don't know how to protect themselves.
It's a very terrifying feeling. And when I didn't feel equipped and strong enough to take care of myself in all ways, this scared the shit out of me.
I didn't have a choice, though. I was experiencing it.
There was no, is it true, is it not? But when you explain things that you've been through, he might be intimidated by how strong you are because you fucking made it. But also, it might make him that person and he might feel less of a man because of it and he might feel unable to protect you from things that he now realized exist so there's a lot of layers to it but my main concern is i don't want you getting insecure because someone says you're too much for them or they can't handle things about your past that you've been through or things that have happened to you.
It does change your brain. And to deal with someone and try to date someone who has experienced certain things like we have, it's going to be a challenge.
The way our brain works is very different. Our awareness level, our survival instincts are ingrained in our day-to-day life.
The way that we can evaluate situations and see shit that's not there, the way we can weed through people's words and dissect lies and spot things immediately is very scary to people. It's going to be very intimidating.
And the things that you feel and the things that you've experienced might cause a lot of feelings to come up in the other person and they don't know how to deal with them. So you have to understand you're a mirror, but you're also a person and I get that.
And it does not feel good for someone to say you're too much for them or for something you've been through to put someone off. But it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you.
You didn't choose this shit. Things happen.
And if someone is not strong enough for you that's okay let them go they need to go find someone who they feel like they're good enough for or sorry strong enough for and capable of being with but i do want to also point out you know i'm always going to fight for you but i will check you if i have to do you weaponize the shit you've been through do you use it as an excuse well this happened to me like do you use it as justification to be weird or do fucked up shit and you're just like oh this happened to me so it's fine do you use things you've been through as justification that might be something that's off-putting but i don't think it's that it might just be the things that you've been through were too much and he realized he wasn't strong enough to be with you. It does not mean anything is wrong with you and you are unlovable.
You are not unlovable by any fucking means. Nothing that has happened to you defines you.
It is not who you are at the core. Your essence is very different and your essence is a light that will always shine through.
Do not question for one second about this be sad be upset but do not attack yourself for someone not being strong enough to handle you and handle the reality you make them face that's not your fucking issue like i said before give people the grace of their ignorance and give people the grace of their weakness not in a derogatory like a mean way but understand there's nothing wrong with you and there's nothing bad about you and what you've been through some people just can't handle it it's like if you give me a typical like golden retriever boy and you try and make us date it's not going to go well it's not going to go right because we have very different survival adaptations and behavioral strategies and emotional intelligence levels and just experience and awareness of things also different values and priorities but you wouldn't look at me and say oh something's wrong with you it's fucked up these things make you bad or make you like not good enough like you should like knock yourself down a peg because you've been through things no you'd look at me and see all the things about me

that are special. And you you see me and I'm saying this because I want you to recognize that I recognize the same thing in you.
The things that you see in me, I see right back in you. Any value you see in me is in you.
So you don't look at me like I'm bad and awful because of shit that I've been through and things that I've experienced. You just know that a certain type of person is needed to be a match to it.
And to be able to handle me. And be able to love me.
It's not that we're hard to love. It's just a different depth of love that we require.
Because we can access it. So don't question yourself once.
Do not question yourself one time about it. Let him go.
Let him go. Go find someone who likes all of you and can handle it and isn't scared by you.
People who are scared and people who are chicken shits are not safe people to be around because when people get scared, they lose a lot of their character and they lose their mind basically. If you ever want to see the truth of someone see how they treat people when they're angry and see how they treat people when they're scared a lot of people go into full self-centered only consider myself mode when they're scared they don't think of consequences they lose the ability to think and be a critical thinker in times of stress and pressure that's one thing nursing nursing taught me a lot about is critical thinking, being able to handle the heat and handle the stress and still be task oriented, be scared shitless, have someone dying in front of me and still have to think things through and make decisions.
There's no time to lay down and cry. It takes a level of strength and emotional resilience and emotional discipline to be able to do that.
You have that. I'm just pointing out things that you got because I don't want you to let this make you question yourself at all.
But people who are scared and people who are weak have no business being in your life if you've been through some shit. If you're a strong person, you can't be around weak people.
You can't. It'll ruin you.
It'll destroy you. And everything will fall on you.
And also, be careful with people who are weak. Because the level you're willing to fight for them, they're not willing to fight for you like that.
Because I'm the type of person, like I said with the golden retriever boy analogy, if you take a normal kid, like a little white kid who's blonde hair, blue eyes, grew up in the up with money parents love them parents are still together siblings and like a golden retriever and like everything was perfect and you pair them up with someone like me and get us to care about each other i'm the type person when i care about somebody if a hundred people are coming at you wanting to fight you a lot of people who are scared will run i'm the type person to see someone i care about i will come up next to you and face these hundred people with you and fight until we die that's how i am that's what i require is that level of strength loyalty commitment and relentlessness and you have to get to it with a lot of shit so you have this gift but my whole point with illustrating this is i require a type of person like that this dude is not like that this dude is the type to see you in trouble and run to secure his own ass i'm the type who will die next to you if i love you i will do whatever i have to do you're not going out alone if it's a hundred on one if i care about it's 100 on two. And I don't care what happens.
We'll fight till we die together. But you're not dying alone.
That's something I require is people who think like that and act like that. I don't like people who get scared and run.
That's what I'm saying. Strong people cannot be around weak people because I'll be fucked if I'm in a situation.
It's happened to me before. I've been jumped.
And I've been the one standing there fighting. And people who were friends with me ran because they were scared.
I don't like that. That puts you in a very bad position when you're a strong person.
You don't want to be let down like that. That's a heartbreak I never want you to experience.
If someone is weak, get them away from you. If you are strong, do not be around people who are not also strong they have no business being around you and it will cause nothing but heartbreak so from my personal experience watch your ass but i hope this illustrated a lot to you and made you feel better and helps you not question yourself you're not wrong do not question your value over this for one second do not question if you're lovable or not for one second about this dude this shit pisses me off but you're more than okay and the day you meet the motherfucker that can handle you and the day you meet someone who can see everything and isn't scared and they stand there like yeah okay but i care about you i like you still i love you i'm here for you i've actually got you he said, I'll always protect you and be there for you.
Yeah, that was bullshit. Because as soon as he got scared, he went back on the word.
But the day you meet the person who looks at the entirety of you and isn't scared and doesn't run, you will say to yourself, God damn, was it worth it? Every weak person who made their way out, thank God they did because this was worth it this is what i was being led to that's what's happened with me so it's gonna be worth it let the people that are weak weed themselves out they will go they will scatter like cockroaches let them and do not question yourself because they go okay uh okay wait next person my ex has me blocked on insta is it weird for him to be bothered even if he has been dating someone for a year and a half he blocked me recently not after we broke up which is why it's weird what's more weird is a year and a half later you're stalking him enough to know that he blocked you. That's what's weird to me.
He's in a new relationship. And you caught that he blocked you immediately.
Babe, really in for a fucking second. Honestly, I don't think he's bothered.
And all of a sudden blocked you because he's bothered about you. His new girl probably was like, get this bitch out of here.
Why do why do you still follow your ex i'm like that if i start talking to somebody or i'm starting to date somebody why the fuck you following anybody you've fiddled and fondled with block them you don't gotta block them but i'm follow him like i'm pretty sure his new girl made him block you i don't think he's over here just so bothered about you he to block you. But my main concern is why are you still looking him up that much that you realized he blocked you immediately? Babe, don't do that.
Let him go. He has to die to you so you can move on.
Stop looking him up. It just hurts you more and more.
And it gives you a false sense of attachment when you lose someone and your brain can't handle it. It's a way of falsely feeling connected to them because you still feel a sense of knowing what they're up to and seeing them and you still feel the weird sense of connection so cut that stop looking them up and let them go it's gonna suck it's gonna be hard but I have plenty of podcast episodes to get you through it about breakups all right next person said am said, am I normal for not loving going out and drinking all the time? Like I'm in my early 20s and a lot of people I know just want to go out and drink.
And I'd much rather just hang out and go to the beach or watch a sunset or exercise or something. You said, am I normal for not loving it? Who the fuck determines what's normal and what's not normal? there's things that are more societally acceptable and there's things that people do more of versus others but for you to not like going out and drinking is very much normal I don't like it I used to love it when I hated my life and I was escaping things yeah I was partying I was having a blast I like to go out occasionally here and there.
But people who go out every weekend, it's fine not to like that.

You're allowed to like whatever you like.

If you don't like that, you don't like that.

It doesn't mean anything's wrong.

It doesn't mean other people who do like it are bad or wrong, though.

So don't be the person who doesn't like it and then shames everybody else

because then you're an asshole.

But if you just don't like doing these things

and you never spend your time in more meaningful ways, do it.

Some people like the release and the carefree and just go party, go forget the week, forget what's going on. Just go have fun and socialize.
A lot of people, that's their social interaction and their carefree time. But it is a superficial sort of interaction because you don't really have any deep conversations when you're out drinking.
Or if you're drunk, you don't remember them. So if you like to have interactions that you remember that's normal that's fine it's just a preference thing but for you wanting more fulfilling activities and fulfilling connections that's a level of connection that you want and that's fine people who don't want that they're fine also everybody's allowed to do what they want who gets the shit but don't question yourself and don't ask am i normal none of us are normal everybody's kind of weird like i said society it's things that are more accepted and people do more of versus not so it's not really like who's normal who's not i think more so you just want permission to not like those things you're allowed to not like drinking and you're allowed to not like going out you're totally fine i'm 101 days sober as of right now so i got tired of the whole phase too no point in it for my life right now i'm working on changes shit i'm moving soon after tour literally right after tour i'm moving the day my tour ends is July 1st.
July 7th is when my lease is up here. I'm not renewing nothing in LA.
I'm getting the hell out of here. But yeah, that's just a random little update with me.
But I don't like a lot of things people like. It's like a stereotype thing we talked about before.
You don't have to like what other people like. And it doesn't make you bad or wrong for not liking it.
You like what you like. And there's other people who also like what you like.
So keep doing the things that you like to do because that's how you meet the people who also like that. So I know it's going to feel isolating a little bit and you're like, nobody in their 20s understands.
A lot of people don't. And that's one thing that happens when you grow up too fast.
You don't enjoy the same things other people enjoy. Like when you have more responsibilities and you've got more things to deal with, pressure more shit going on or you've been through certain things you're not able to just be so carefree and just go about doing what other people do that are your age you're going to feel very isolated you're going to feel like no one understands you're going to be like i wish i could be carefree and do those things but that's a whole different topic i feel like that's good for this episode so thank you for watching if you like this episode leave this video a thumbs up and if you're listening to the audio version on apple podcast and spotify leave me five stars rating you know the drill and if you listen this far into the episode comment a smiley face emoji whichever smiley face you like the most i just like to go to the comments and see who actually listens all the way through hey you a real one if you got this far but like i said i do have nine more shows left on my tour so if you want to get a ticket the link will be in the description i'll also leave all my social media everything else you need for me will be there new merch is coming soon very very soon and it might be out before the next episode so keep up with my socials if you want to get a jump and a head start on it

since this is the end of the episode and the real ones are here the collection coming out

is called fuck forgiveness so get excited for that all the clothes are so sick but that is all

i've got for this episode i'm gonna shut up before i get myself in trouble and reveal too much

everybody be safe take care of yourself and i'll talk to you guys next sunday