Friendship Fallouts & Controversy with Kail Lowry

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Speaker 6 Okay, so we're here. We're here.

Speaker 7 We're finally here.

Speaker 8 Kale, you're on Kate and Ty Break It Down.

Speaker 1 I'm so excited. Are you excited? Yeah, I'm excited too because we're working together again and I didn't know if I would ever see you guys like in person.

Speaker 5 Again, I know. And here we are.

Speaker 1 And you guys trusted me enough to even ask me for advice. And I was like, fuck yeah, like this is my bread and butter.

Speaker 8 Well, it's funny because I'm like, all right, let's reach out to Kale and ask her about it.

Speaker 8 And then all of a sudden, it just turned into like, I had no, we had no intention of like, oh, we'll work together.

Speaker 1 We're going to sign to my network.

Speaker 5 Well, first, we we just want to.

Speaker 8 No, Kale was not.

Speaker 5 I didn't know what was going on.

Speaker 4 Well, like,

Speaker 4 that wasn't our first thought. Honestly, it was more or less like, you know, she's really good at what she does.
She's a friend of ours. We like Kale.

Speaker 5 You know, like, I'm going to ask her some advice.

Speaker 4 Yeah. And then eventually it progressed that way.
And I said, we would be stupid not to.

Speaker 1 I was like, I don't know if you guys have any, like, literally, well, any help you guys need, like, that's what all of us are here for.

Speaker 5 Well, it was all people.

Speaker 4 And you've been, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you've always been like that.
So I was like, well, it'd be stupid not to act to do all of it.

Speaker 1 I also think that I have paid my dues in the podcast community and where like i have been through three networks and the first one i went through um we there was like lawyers and litigation and things like that and i understood that um a lot of podcasters enter the podcast world and don't own their content and so signing to my network i fight for anyone that signs to killer to own their own stuff so if you decided you're not happy with me you take all your shit with you right i'm not gonna try to capitalize off of your shit which is awesome that's the same I'm not going to try to capitalize off of what you have built.

Speaker 1 Right. You know what I mean? And because I went through that, that's been really, really important to me.

Speaker 1 Like, even if someone chooses not to sign with my network, like go somewhere where you're going to own all of your content and you get to take that with you and you can't be replaced.

Speaker 1 Cause a lot of times what will happen is they'll say, oh, you built, break it down. Perfect.
We'll change the names and add two new hosts.

Speaker 5 Wow.

Speaker 1 And they'll use all of the audience that you built. Right.

Speaker 5 And put someone else there.

Speaker 1 And so I advocate for that to not happen.

Speaker 8 Well, that's why when we reached out, it was like just out of advice at first. And then you were like, I mean, this is what's going on.
I'm like, all right, well, it seems authentic enough.

Speaker 8 And what was,

Speaker 8 what else, what do I have to lose? You know what I mean?

Speaker 4 It wasn't, you know, Ty and I, we've known you for years and we, there's been many moments where it's just been us and you, and we've talked about deep things. And you're just a very authentic person.

Speaker 4 And, you know, so I was like, well, I'm just glad that we all got to work together.

Speaker 1 I think that a lot of people also think that I burnt bridges with MTV and like, don't.

Speaker 5 Oh, they do? Yeah.

Speaker 5 Because there was a scene.

Speaker 1 Where's Larry?

Speaker 1 There's an iconic scene where I'm in my podcast, one of my podcast studios, and I like Larry the bird, but it wasn't, it wasn't, I think people perceive it however they want to perceive it.

Speaker 1 I wasn't flipping Larry off. You know what I mean? And so people think that I burnt the bridges with MTV and then I don't have relationships with like you or Macy or

Speaker 8 who are you flipping off?

Speaker 5 I think just in general, like I was just like fucking fuck this sort of deal.

Speaker 1 Not sort of like fuck Larry or fuck MTV. It was just like I was not in a good state of mind, but it was just sort of like fuck everything.

Speaker 8 Well, because in reality, it's like, how could you even realistically say fuck MTV? Because it's like, you wouldn't, you wouldn't even and I wouldn't have what I have without it.

Speaker 8 I mean, so I was like, you know, that's the thing.

Speaker 1 They're like, well, Kale is, she has to remember where she came from. No, 100% I do.
And I give flowers and I give credit where credit is due all the time. I understand that MTV is where I started.

Speaker 5 I understand.

Speaker 1 But I also feel like some of some of the cast, this is no shade to anyone. Yeah.
Some cast members take that platform and launch and propel themselves into different directions and some don't.

Speaker 5 Absolutely.

Speaker 1 So to say that I still owe them something when I've said thank you, I've paid my, like I've done all the things, I've literally exploited my entire life.

Speaker 1 I also deserve credit for propelling myself to the platform.

Speaker 4 Yeah, and what you have done with that platform. Yes.

Speaker 8 So people think you still owe, you're saying that people.

Speaker 1 Like I should still be

Speaker 8 thankful. I mean, I think you are.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 I mean, you're never going to go away. Right.

Speaker 4 But I'm going to be able to do that. But it takes away my ass.
I was going to say, and it feels like they take it away. Yeah.

Speaker 4 When they're not seeing what you have done to really, like you said, propel yourself to bigger things.

Speaker 1 Sort of like when Ty was talking to us about how

Speaker 1 people

Speaker 1 getting mad at him for your decisions and your power and your choices. Yeah.
It's sort of like that.

Speaker 1 Like, yeah, I know where I came from, but I also have sort of paved the path for other opportunities.

Speaker 5 Absolutely.

Speaker 1 And thank you to MTV for giving me the start. You know what I mean? Right.

Speaker 4 Right. And like you said, that'll never go away.
And I think that's normal. Yeah.

Speaker 8 Yeah, it's not like you're out here bashing MTV or trying to get it. Right.

Speaker 1 You know, I get mad sometimes.

Speaker 5 Who doesn't? I mean, who doesn't?

Speaker 4 Who doesn't?

Speaker 5 I get it, you know.

Speaker 8 So when you think about our show, I mean, as far as T-Mom goes, it's the only one that's out there that's like this.

Speaker 8 I mean, nothing has been followed this diligently, this long, this intense, because we're not a party show. We're not housewives.

Speaker 8 We are like us, nitty-gritty, middle of trauma, parenting, and just marriages, divorce. I mean, the whole thing.

Speaker 5 And I feel like for you,

Speaker 8 yeah, for you, that was a big thing. It was like all your relationship stuff.

Speaker 1 All of that, even my friendships, which is something that Macy and I talked about. Oh, interesting.

Speaker 8 Okay.

Speaker 1 I said all of my my my falling outs with friends or even just like separating from friends were so public because they were such a huge part of my story on MTV which they're a big part of my life like in general do you regret like having your friendships be so involved on in the TV world do you okay not in a way that I

Speaker 1 I don't regret the friendships, but I think having them so publicized, but I don't have family members that can be on the show.

Speaker 5 That's exactly what my thought was.

Speaker 1 What am I supposed to do when you want me to have a conversation? It was sort of like, and I hate to say this, but like Pharah really didn't have anyone. Right.

Speaker 1 So that's when they, if I remember correctly, that's when they started having to break the fourth wall with her producer because she literally didn't have anyone to talk to. Right.

Speaker 1 So it was either that or I was talking to friends. And so I think in that way, like, obviously I needed to have those conversations.

Speaker 1 But at the same time, I do think that it changed the dynamic and the intentions of the people that I was talking to was like.

Speaker 1 It either didn't start off authentic and genuine or it turned into something where they wanted to have a following. They wanted to get paid.

Speaker 5 They wanted to

Speaker 1 100%.

Speaker 1 And I think that's where a lot of them sort of went wrong. Where Becky and I don't have that same story, which you guys already met, Becky earlier.

Speaker 1 It was like a very different sort of situation that happened.

Speaker 4 Well, and I remember Becky from years ago, meeting New York City, hanging out, you know, like I do.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 8 And then you guys had a falling out, but it wasn't really publicized by TV cameras, right?

Speaker 1 No, no, we never, we actually never talked about it. We never, we fell out, and it was like very apparent publicly.

Speaker 1 But I think just having my relationship, my friendship so public has been really rough.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Are you still friends to any of those people that like that you had a falling out with publicly on no any oh really anyone that has publicly said something about me you are dead to me and I will never look back the fact that Becky never went public about it

Speaker 1 I feel like we can grow and we can progress and we can rekindle. But anyone else, if you've said anything publicly about me and or are falling out, I will never speak to you again.

Speaker 4 Because I think it speaks it speaks to somebody's soul and their authenticity and who they are as a person. 100%.
Right. You know, like people who truly love us and are actually

Speaker 4 really good people and aren't using us to get something wouldn't go to the media, wouldn't sell things, wouldn't, you know, publish.

Speaker 8 Which is why we literally have the same friends that we've had since we were in middle school.

Speaker 1 Because none of them ever, like, their motives never changed. Exactly.

Speaker 4 And it's super hard when you're on television or just in the spotlight at all to make new friends because I don't trust people.

Speaker 8 You know how that is.

Speaker 1 Like, it's like, but I want to give everybody the benefit of the doubt. So I will not trust someone and still let them in because

Speaker 1 I want to believe they're going to prove me wrong. Right.
Has anyone in your life asked you for money?

Speaker 5 All the time. Oh, yeah.
Really?

Speaker 8 Oh, yeah. And I've actually, no, I've actually helped a lot of people, but I never would even go public with it because it was my intention was literally just to help you out.
Right.

Speaker 8 But.

Speaker 4 Oh, yeah. We get asked for money all the time.

Speaker 5 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 The closest people to me have never asked me for money.

Speaker 4 Oh, the closest people to me have asked me for money.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. It's the people that I'm not close with that have asked for money.

Speaker 5 That's weird. Isn't that interesting?

Speaker 1 That's weird. Becky was offered like $10,000 to sell me out.

Speaker 5 Wow. So you all have to.
We talked a little bit about that.

Speaker 8 Oh, to just

Speaker 5 like, oh, you did?

Speaker 1 Yeah, we did. I didn't get to sit in on the episode.
Okay.

Speaker 1 So for anyone listening to this episode, I am helping Caitlin and Tyler launch their podcast and I'm just here to support you guys in any way I can.

Speaker 1 So if I ever like take over this podcast, just stop me.

Speaker 1 Yeah. But so I wasn't there for the recording with Becky, but what did she say?

Speaker 4 She said the same thing, how people were reaching out to her and companies were reaching out to to her and saying, Hey, we'll pay you this, we'll pay you that.

Speaker 4 And she's like, and that was never part of like what I would want to do. She was like, It was just more of, hey, we're not talking, and that's what it is.

Speaker 4 Like, she was like, It didn't bring any interest to me. And she said it actually bugged her a lot that all these people were reaching out to her, wanting her to talk about things.

Speaker 1 Well, even like other friends that I fell out with, she said reached out to her to try to like

Speaker 1 be like friends and both.

Speaker 5 Well, those people I feel aren't really true friends, obviously.

Speaker 5 Right, right, right.

Speaker 8 But I feel like with with our, with, with our friends, I genuinely like, not that they asked for money, but they were just, I'm not going to watch you suffer.

Speaker 1 100. But that's different.

Speaker 8 And my, yeah, right.

Speaker 9 They're not like, hey, I need money.

Speaker 5 Right, no.

Speaker 8 I have, it's like, no, I, I, I refuse to watch my tribe suffer.

Speaker 8 And if I can do something about it, I will do something about it because, like, me and her, and some people, even my mom is like, why would you do that? And it's like, mom, it's just, money is money.

Speaker 8 It comes and it goes. I could die tomorrow and it's gone.

Speaker 5 It's worth it.

Speaker 4 And to me, it's like when I do see a friend of mine that's a single mom that is working her ass off to try to do her best and she is struggling to make, you know, to find a place of her own.

Speaker 4 It helps me feel good to know that I'm helping my friend who is working her ass off and doing all the right things, but just not being able to catch up.

Speaker 5 100%. You know what I mean?

Speaker 4 It also makes me feel like when I'm sitting here in a home with all three of my kids and they have food and they have toys and they have

Speaker 5 more than enough. Yes.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Last year we did, for Barely Famous, we did a Christmas give back where it was like clear the list, but people submitted their stories for why they needed help and I made my kids help me read them because I wanted my kids to understand what was why we needed to help other people.

Speaker 1 And them reading some of these stories, I feel like made such an impact on them. And so, if there's ever a time that you guys want to ever

Speaker 1 come together to do something like that, like we do it every year for clear the list, like back to school and also for Christmas.

Speaker 9 Yeah, for the teachers too.

Speaker 4 Yeah, Ty and I are very like, I do, um, I've done adopt a family. Well, and I do it for like Thanksgiving dinners.
People think that people, just everybody can have a Thanksgiving dinner.

Speaker 4 That shit's expensive. Yeah.
And I've taken Novo with with me where we go and we get the food and we take it to the person. Novo helps me bring the groceries in.
And these people like cry.

Speaker 5 And Nova. It's until like Christmas dinners.

Speaker 4 We've adopted kids and, you know, because you should. You should give back to people for sure.
You know, need it.

Speaker 8 And also, like, as far as a lot of our friends were just kind of living the same childhoods that we did. So like when they're doing all the right things, like we, we, we've gotten them houses.

Speaker 8 We've helped them get cars.

Speaker 5 We've got people houses. And trailers.
But still. But yeah.
All right.

Speaker 4 But our friend, though, like, we helped her, you know, we helped her get a trailer, but she paid us back. Like, and that was the thing she wanted to help him.

Speaker 5 All the time. Yeah.

Speaker 4 You know, and she, every time she got taxes, she sent us the money, you know, and eventually she paid it back.

Speaker 5 I'm fine with that.

Speaker 1 I had someone where I helped them pay off college, and she was like, I'll pay you back. She got her MTV check and bought a car.

Speaker 1 A new car. She already had one.

Speaker 5 She went on a cruise with her boyfriend.

Speaker 1 I was like, okay. Is this a former friend? Yeah.
I mean, we never had a falling out. We just never spoke again.
But I mean, she did things, she never paid me back.

Speaker 5 Really?

Speaker 5 Wow.

Speaker 1 Hey, whatever. She probably hasn't thought twice.
But it's the, it's your intention was pure.

Speaker 1 And that's the thing. It's like, I try to hold on to that, but it's just the point that you said you would pay me back.
If you would have never said, oh, I'll pay you back.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't think twice about it.

Speaker 5 It's just like.

Speaker 8 But yeah, like, even just even recently, we got our friend who just got her child back from not, and we got her a car because she's just struggling, didn't have a car. And it's just like,

Speaker 8 and also letting one of our friends borrow my car. I'm not going to sit there with two cars in my driveway and then have someone in my tribe three actually, yeah, and not have a car.

Speaker 8 I'm like, I'm not even driving this, take it, use it, and they're like, oh my god, really? I'm like, yeah, it's fine.

Speaker 8 Like, I feel like like if you take care of your people, your people take care of you. And it's just like...

Speaker 5 That's how awesome our friends are.

Speaker 4 And we've had them since middle school, you know?

Speaker 1 That's so crazy to me. I feel like I've also moved a lot.
So it's been sort of impossible.

Speaker 8 So you have no childhood friends from when you were like young.

Speaker 1 I mean, I keep in touch with some like on social or like we might text from time to time. But I would say, I mean, I moved a lot when I was a kid up until even recently.

Speaker 1 I mean, I just moved to Delaware 10 years ago. So any friendships there, but then halfway through, you know, the 10 years, Javi and I got divorced.

Speaker 1 So the friendships sort of by default, not by anybody's fault, but sort of sort of separated.

Speaker 1 And then, so I don't think that I have had the, even if I wanted to, would have had the ability to like maintain a lot of the friendships just by default.

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Speaker 8 What is your like longest friendship? Like years? Like, how, who's your old? I mean, because if you're moving all the time, how do you even get connected?

Speaker 8 How do you like established or stay connected?

Speaker 1 That was the hardest part because I didn't get a cell phone until I was 16.

Speaker 1 So I didn't, any time that I moved before I turned 16, I couldn't maintain a relationship. I didn't have a computer.

Speaker 5 I didn't have a phone.

Speaker 1 So it was more like reconnecting once I had a cell phone. But I would say, like, once I got a cell phone, I was able to reconnect with people.
I mean, I've kept in touch.

Speaker 1 Like I I said, I think a longest friend would be, I mean, I've been friends with Kristen for 10 years.

Speaker 1 Okay. Yeah.
I've been friends with Becky. I mean, obviously with the exception of our falling out about 12 years.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 1 And so I've had like long-term friends, but like childhood friends, no. I mean, these are friendships for my adulthood.

Speaker 9 Wow. Right.

Speaker 5 Do you know what I mean? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, I have. Again, like, I don't want to discredit anyone listening to this.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I'm, we're friends, but I mean, like, on a, like a, a really intimate personal level, I don't think that I have any really childhood friends.

Speaker 8 Yeah, so do you feel like, because I feel, do you feel like people like get that misconception about you that, like, oh, you, you have so many friends?

Speaker 8 Because I remember Becky said something about, which I didn't even know.

Speaker 8 She's like, yeah, you know, Kale always gets this, this hate for having revolving door of friends and can't keep like friendships or whatever.

Speaker 5 I'm like, what are you talking about? Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, I think on a regular, especially because, you know, Baby Mama's podcast is done. Yeah.
And so everyone just automatically assumed, oh, it's Kale's fault.

Speaker 1 And so because Kale can't keep a friend, well, I've lost Becky. I've lost Mark.
I've lost, you know, there's, there's friendships that I have really, really,

Speaker 1 people

Speaker 1 thought were a lot deeper than they were, or, or maybe because of the situation that we fell out, or whatever the case may be, it's always my fault.

Speaker 1 Oh, and so that's kind of what I was explaining to you earlier is that I still have this like very

Speaker 1 perception that I am so reactive. I'm so angry.

Speaker 5 I'm so bitter.

Speaker 1 I can't keep a friend. I'm always the problem.
Like, that's what I'm saying. I don't, you don't come.

Speaker 5 I know.

Speaker 8 So maybe we're not in the loop.

Speaker 5 So I'm like, that's what people think of me.

Speaker 1 Like, they truly believe that. And I'm just like, but it's not even like even with me and Becky, it wasn't a one-sided situation that caused us to fall out.
It was very much a mutual decision.

Speaker 1 It was not even a decision, but more so like mutual

Speaker 1 circumstances

Speaker 1 that caused it. And I think that's across the board for all of them.
But for some reason, people just assume it's me.

Speaker 8 So, okay, so with the friendships that you had for like 10 years or whatever, obviously you had kids in those 10 years.

Speaker 8 And so do your friends, are they close with your children?

Speaker 1 And then your children, I i mean do you have to explain to your kids like oh the reason why becky's not around anymore or whatever like you know what i mean becky i had to explain okay becky i definitely had because she was she was at my house like every weekend because we never live she lives in jersey and i live in delaware so it was sort of a drive but like we were doing christmases together like oh wow so there was like a huge gap and we were like everyone was like what's going on um but i i don't necessarily have to explain well what's fucked up is i had a friend Fall out and then they reached out to Isaac.

Speaker 1 They were texting him. And I was like, oh, you're weird.

Speaker 9 No, no, no, no, yeah.

Speaker 1 See, like, that's where I draw the line. Like, now you've got me fucked up.

Speaker 5 Yeah. So, um, but yeah.

Speaker 4 You're reaching out to my kids.

Speaker 5 Like, what? Yeah, that's weird.

Speaker 7 Yeah. No.
No.

Speaker 5 Definitely. Off limits.
Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 5 Obviously.

Speaker 4 And my first thought is, obviously, you are not an adult because you're reaching out to a child.

Speaker 5 Yeah, like 100%. That is very weird.

Speaker 1 That's so interesting. Because I feel like Macy's had the same friends.
Chelsea's had the same friends. I think Leah hasn't really necessarily had the same friends, but nobody talks about that.

Speaker 5 Right. And I'm not calling her out by any means.

Speaker 1 Not that you're right. Like, shade.
No. You know what I mean? So I think that there are, why do I, why, but maybe because they're not as big of a part on the show.

Speaker 8 That's what I'm saying. Like, you said that.

Speaker 9 That's what Macy said.

Speaker 8 Yeah, you because you said that, like, all my friends became this huge part of my TV story.

Speaker 4 Because you don't have the family and stuff like that, too.

Speaker 5 Friends, you're a family.

Speaker 8 Which I think me and Kate kind of relate to because we're like, you know, when you come from such a fucked up family, you create your own.

Speaker 8 You pick and choose your friends.

Speaker 8 They become your tribe, and it becomes almost like closer. I'm closer to a lot of my friends than I

Speaker 8 ever would be to my family.

Speaker 1 Like for your story, you guys would always have each other to talk to if you didn't have somebody else. Where like I wasn't always in a relationship.
Wait, what's Blue Monkey?

Speaker 5 Okay, so I talk a lot and I, whatever.

Speaker 8 So I go into these tangents and I, it leads off into other shit. So that's why you're going to make a great podcaster.

Speaker 5 I don't know. We'll see.

Speaker 9 Let's don't. Yeah.

Speaker 8 But I'll like, I'll be talking. Usually when we're driving or like when something's happening.
We're in bed. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'll be and you know, she's trying kind of bed, like laying or like having sex.

Speaker 4 No, like, no, no, no.

Speaker 9 Why are you saying you're lucky?

Speaker 8 You're, you're really

Speaker 5 no.

Speaker 4 Like, watching TV and he's going on these tantrums.

Speaker 8 She's like, I'm just trying to watch fat people get surgery. Like, if you're over here talking about.

Speaker 1 Do you watch A Thousand Pound Sisters?

Speaker 5 Oh, dude. No.
No. She watches

Speaker 1 600 Pound Life and

Speaker 8 lifting and scrubbing and stuff.

Speaker 4 I haven't watched my 600-pound life in like half a while.

Speaker 8 She watches toxic shit, dude. I do not.

Speaker 4 I watch Alone, Naked and Afraid. I watch Intervention.
I watch.

Speaker 8 All I know is I come in there, TLC fat people, bro. And I'm, I'm telling you right now.

Speaker 1 I love a thousand pound sisters. You can't tell me shit about Amy.

Speaker 1 You can't tell me shit about Tammy.

Speaker 8 A thousand pound sisters is the one with the brow, heavy brow.

Speaker 5 Yes, yes, yes.

Speaker 8 All right. Sorry.
No shade. Listen, no.

Speaker 5 Heavy brow. No, no.
Okay.

Speaker 8 I just saw a picture.

Speaker 1 We should get them on your podcast.

Speaker 5 Okay, come on, Tammy.

Speaker 5 Whatever you are.

Speaker 5 No, you know what?

Speaker 1 We're actually going to. Kate's going to be the producer, and it's going to be Ty and Tammy.

Speaker 4 Oh, I love it.

Speaker 5 But back to Blue Monkey. Okay.

Speaker 8 Oh, yeah. Back to Blue Monkey.
Okay. See what I'm saying?

Speaker 8 So Blue Monkey is like, if I notice I'm talking a lot and I get annoyed at myself, my own head, and I'll look over and I can tell that she's just a head nodder. Okay, she's head nodding right now.

Speaker 8 He's saying, yeah, yeah. Oh, wow.

Speaker 8 And so I'll say, like, I'll be, yeah, you know, talking about, you know, oh my God. So maybe we'll build a deck and, you know, in the Blue Monkey thing and then we'll do that.

Speaker 8 And she's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm like, all right, that's how I know I need to shut my mouth.

Speaker 1 Say blue monkey

Speaker 8 in the middle of a sentence just to see if, because if you're really listening, you'll catch it and be like, Blue monkey, deck, like, what are you talking about?

Speaker 1 Did you do that to your, like, but you did that? You didn't come up with that?

Speaker 4 No, he just doesn't. I just found out this out like three days ago.

Speaker 5 Yeah, she just found it out. So barely.
I swear to God.

Speaker 8 I said, no, you didn't. I swear.
I was like, and she's like, what do you say? I said, I say blue monkey because I know for a fact.

Speaker 5 I've started dying, dude.

Speaker 8 Because she knows. She's like, oh, I do check out a lot because you go on these rambling things.

Speaker 1 So I have, so when you guys are not together for a day, like, say you guys guys are like going separate ways for whatever reason, and he wants to tell you a story of what happened.

Speaker 1 Is he telling you every little detail from start to finish until the point that you're like, Wait, I don't understand what the point of the story is?

Speaker 4 All right, so Tyler is not so much that part.

Speaker 4 Okay, he'll he can say what happened during the day and whatever he's frustrated about. And I'm like, oh my God, wow, that's crazy, you know, and have a conversation.

Speaker 4 It's more or less when he's on like cloud nine,

Speaker 4 and let's just say, and he all of a sudden is like, you know, so you know, it always starts off with that first of all. And it's always like, so, you know, we are all part of the star.

Speaker 4 We have scientists have found out that we are part, we have stardust in our genes, and we all come from the stars because the stars explode and the stars were up in space.

Speaker 4 So actually, we're a part of the stars, and our ancestors are part of all the stars.

Speaker 1 But do we actually have stardust in us?

Speaker 5 Yes. Or you made that up.
No, I don't make it.

Speaker 5 I'm going to tell lies.

Speaker 4 And for a while, I'm listening, like, oh, well, that's interesting. And then it's just going.

Speaker 1 Wait, it's in our DNA?

Speaker 9 And going.

Speaker 8 Your body's made of stardust. Yes.

Speaker 1 Are you lying?

Speaker 5 Let's google it, girl.

Speaker 8 Go ahead and Google it. It's solid science.
But anyway, that's a good example. That's a good example.
Yeah, usually a lot of the stuff is.

Speaker 1 Are we made of stardust?

Speaker 1 Hold on, let me Google this.

Speaker 1 I have the pop your pussy like this.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 7 Are

Speaker 7 we

Speaker 7 made of stardust?

Speaker 1 People have googled this before.

Speaker 1 Yes, scientifically speaking, humans are considered made of stardust because the atoms that make up our bodies, like carbon, oxygen, and iron, were primarily created inside stars through nuclear fusion before our solar system formed, meaning the material that

Speaker 1 constitutes us originated from the stars that exploded long ago.

Speaker 7 Yep.

Speaker 1 There you go. Why do you know that?

Speaker 5 I know, guys.

Speaker 5 Exactly.

Speaker 8 That's why Blue Monkey is important because there's things that I'm interested in where she just is like.

Speaker 5 This is when you were on ketamine. No.

Speaker 8 No, no, it's not. This is me and my normal brain, okay? It's exhausting up here.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 the next inside-out movie is going to be Tyler's Grain.

Speaker 8 Seriously, dude, no, too many, too many things going on there. But yeah, so it's like a thing that I do.

Speaker 9 Yeah.

Speaker 8 Which it's funny because I guess I've been doing it for so long. I never thought to have to tell you about it.
Because, listen, this is why I do it.

Speaker 8 I do it because I don't want to make her feel like an asshole for me to be like, are you listening to me? You know, and she's like, no.

Speaker 9 Yeah. I mean, I don't know.

Speaker 8 It's like, I don't want to put the pressure on it because I know I talk a lot. It's called accountability.
I'm a gibber jabber, whatever. Right.
And so it's my way of just being like, okay, it's okay.

Speaker 8 Take account.

Speaker 8 You're You're going on it.

Speaker 1 So you're not offended by it.

Speaker 5 Absolutely not.

Speaker 8 I'm exhausted myself.

Speaker 1 I love the self-awareness. I hate.

Speaker 4 But then I found out that he used to do it to his mother when he was young. No.
And that's where it started. That's where it started.

Speaker 1 Did it hurt your feelings when you did it to your mom?

Speaker 8 No.

Speaker 5 I really knew.

Speaker 9 I knew ADHD. Yeah.

Speaker 8 Yes.

Speaker 1 Are you medicated?

Speaker 8 No. Not like that.
Not like.

Speaker 1 No, but the animation in his face

Speaker 1 when he talks is everything.

Speaker 8 Yeah. I just feel that, okay, it's my own way of, actually, it's helping you.
I don't want to make you feel like an asshole, but did you see what I said? You're like,

Speaker 1 you're like, make her feel bad.

Speaker 9 Yeah, because I know myself. Right.

Speaker 8 It's like, shut the fuck up, Tyler.

Speaker 5 Right.

Speaker 1 God damn it. The good thing about podcasting is that you're able to shut it off when you feel like it.
Cause if you over talk, you can just like clip it down.

Speaker 4 Which that's great. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 8 I need that. I love it.
We joked about it where Kate's like, I'm about to get you a Tyler red button.

Speaker 4 I know. I'm going to get a red button.

Speaker 1 Let him do Tyler Rant segments.

Speaker 5 Oh, that's great.

Speaker 9 No, no, no. For mini-episodes.

Speaker 5 I don't think people want to.

Speaker 4 Or no, we're going to do the did you knows.

Speaker 8 No, but so did you know?

Speaker 9 And Kate's like, oh,

Speaker 4 we're going to do this, because I swear, that's how it always starts out.

Speaker 8 No, because, like, oh, you know how you do your book stuff? Yeah.

Speaker 5 And I was talking about, oh, I have, I read books too.

Speaker 9 And I was like, no.

Speaker 5 Join the book club. You would not like my books.
Why? What are your books? The last book.

Speaker 4 Very scientifically.

Speaker 8 Right now I'm reading

Speaker 8 Leaving Faith.

Speaker 8 It's all philosophy stuff.

Speaker 1 You should join a book club.

Speaker 8 Yeah, it's philosophy. Yeah, but you're reading like some

Speaker 1 romance in the clear. We're all fam.

Speaker 8 I'm just saying. The immortality key, I don't think anyone would be interested in the immortality key book.

Speaker 5 Okay, well, I'd be back together.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I would, I would think.

Speaker 5 Really?

Speaker 5 I'll ask.

Speaker 1 I'll ask in the book club and I'll say we have a special guest.

Speaker 8 Like, right now, I'm reading Deconstructing, Leaving Church, Fighting Faith, which is a whole thing about, yeah. But so it's always like, I don't follow, what do you call it? Like stories.

Speaker 1 Oh, like fiction.

Speaker 8 Yeah, exactly. They're all like,

Speaker 5 I don't even want to call them. Self-help.
No, no, no.

Speaker 4 Not even self-help. It's more like awareness, like history.

Speaker 8 society, knowledge is power.

Speaker 4 Brain, how does the brain work? Think good things.

Speaker 5 Very science-y.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 And I'm not into science.

Speaker 8 You're into fat people on TLC.

Speaker 4 I think what it is is because he always complains that I watch boring TV and there's no like plot and twist to it. I said, to me, I'm like, I am a mom for so many hours a day.

Speaker 4 And when I get the four hours to just do nothing, I don't want to think that hard.

Speaker 1 Right. You want to watch brainless, sell-less.
Yeah. Like you don't

Speaker 1 garbage teams.

Speaker 10 She can turn it off, and I cannot turn it off.

Speaker 8 I'm always.

Speaker 5 Oh, I can shut it off. Yeah.

Speaker 8 I wish I could. I'm envious.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, I like to watch just stuff. I don't have to believe things.

Speaker 8 So, when you're, you got seven kids. So, is that what you do? You read your books? Is that how you kind of escape?

Speaker 1 I actually just said that to my book club yesterday. I texted in the group because one of the girls is also a mom and she reads as many books as I do.
And she also, she was texting about a show.

Speaker 1 And I said, Nicole, I do not understand how you're a mom. You read and you watch TV.
I get to pick between TV or reading books. It's one or the other.
It's not both. Right.
So I was asking,

Speaker 1 was I asking you guys? Yeah, I was asking you guys how many of the girls are on TV. Like, I don't know anything about anything.
Yeah. Because I just read.
I don't even watch TV at all.

Speaker 8 We don't even, listen, the only TV we watch is in our bedroom, which I don't even watch. I'm reading about stars.
And she's watching TLC and Tammy. And so I'm like,

Speaker 8 you know, our TVs are bluey and Miss Rachel, and that's just what it is. Like, so I don't really watch TV.
I just read.

Speaker 5 Read. Yeah, I'm saying.

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Speaker 4 We have two of them at home because Nova is Tyler to a T. The animations, the mind, the thinking.

Speaker 4 Yes, I do too. I love it about her.

Speaker 1 I hope that never changes.

Speaker 4 Yeah, same thing. She got out.
I told Tyler this. So the one day that he usually does the morning stuff with the kids and gets them up and gets them ready to school.

Speaker 4 And I always do the nighttime routine.

Speaker 5 So that's how we split it. Yeah.

Speaker 4 And so, but the one morning he didn't sleep well. So I got up with the kids.
Nova, six o'clock in the morning.

Speaker 5 Her eyes are still closed.

Speaker 4 Hey, mom, did you know that we all have stardust in our stuff? And dinner?

Speaker 1 No, no, what he exactly

Speaker 1 knows.

Speaker 5 I learned.

Speaker 4 To a T. And I was like, oh my God.
I just like I just

Speaker 8 turn your coffee like, dude, my husband.

Speaker 5 Yes.

Speaker 4 And I told him he goes, wow. He said, but that made me feel so good because she's just intrigued about science.
Like she loves science. And she really absorbed everything he said.

Speaker 4 And she was so like in

Speaker 4 it. And in awe of it, of like, you know, she looks up at the stars stars now and she's like, can you believe like we are, our ancestors are a part of that?

Speaker 5 Yeah, you mean no, but I was like, wow.

Speaker 4 So, it's funny because some, some days it's just like, both, I'm like sitting over there and both of them are,

Speaker 1 maybe he should do the nighttime routine so that he, they can talk, you know what I mean?

Speaker 5 Right? Oh, yeah. To do like science.

Speaker 9 No, no, no, okay.

Speaker 8 You want to switch?

Speaker 9 You want to switch? No.

Speaker 5 Are you sure? No, no, no. I'm not a morning person.
Oh, dude.

Speaker 1 Nope. I feel like for you guys, too, like just being together, you don't know any different, right? Yeah.

Speaker 4 Or is it different because you've seen your parents do different no you know where i think that comes from have you ever um read the book uh

Speaker 4 daughters of an alcohol of alcoholics no read it kale yeah life-changing and it resonated with me on so many deep levels so many of those pages i highlighted everything in that book that really stood out to me and like i could relate to and i think that children you know children that are raised in alcoholic homes, we just subconsciously take on, and you were the oldest, right?

Speaker 1 The only. The only, okay.

Speaker 4 So, first, you take on all of the roles of like monitoring how your parent is feeling because we don't know how they're going to react.

Speaker 4 We don't know what kind of state they're going to be in when we are there. They're very unpredictable.

Speaker 4 So, we have to take all of this stuff in and kind of control our environment and make sure everything goes smoothly and nobody freaks out.

Speaker 4 And I, I definitely took that into my relationship with Tyler. There was lots of times where he would like joke around and I would take like offense to it.
Like, oh,

Speaker 8 you'd internalize it a lot.

Speaker 4 And I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, the same thing, always asking him, are you, you know, he'd be in a bad mood. I'm like, oh my God, are you okay? And you're not okay because it's something I did.

Speaker 4 And it's like 100%.

Speaker 8 Yeah. And she would, I was like, do not emotional, emotionally monitor me.
That's what we're doing.

Speaker 5 I'm your safe.

Speaker 8 I'm not your mom. I'm not your, I'm not your abuser.
I'm not, I'm not here to hurt you. I'm here to love you and support you.
So please don't emotionally monitor me. It's fine.

Speaker 8 And I felt like at the time, but I didn't know any of that at first. So I was like, why are you so like,

Speaker 8 like paranoid almost? Like, and I was like, What is going on? So, yeah, and reading, like, you need to like, and by the way, that book, it's a very easy read.

Speaker 4 It's not very

Speaker 4 read it on a plane ride, yeah, it's not very like doctor-y, okay, yeah, yeah,

Speaker 4 I'm gonna, I'm gonna send it to you.

Speaker 1 Okay, because we're going to Spain next week and we're there for two weeks, so that flight.

Speaker 5 Oh, that's sweet, yeah.

Speaker 1 Lincoln got picked to play soccer to go out to Spain, yeah.

Speaker 5 So we're gonna go.

Speaker 8 All right, speaking of like kids, sports, okay, so how many of your seven kids are in sports?

Speaker 1 Yeah, so three are in sports, one is in like other things. So Isaac does, he's the president of ASL Club.
Okay. He is, he just auditioned for a play at school and then he also is in the debate team.

Speaker 1 So he has like several after school things. Love it.

Speaker 8 I always want to do the debate team.

Speaker 1 Well, so it was a little tricky because he showed interest and then he was sort of confused by it because you have to like learn the rules and like the techniques and the tactics to debate properly and speak properly.

Speaker 1 And so he was kind of having a rough time, but I was like, listen, you can ask for your professors or your teachers for help or you can get a job because i'm not we're doing one or the other you're either gonna fill your schedule with like academics and things that you can put on a resume or you're gonna go get a job so it's one or the other and i think at that point he was like okay i'm gonna reach out to my teachers and get help and now he likes it okay good um and i love that what are the rules in debate club i thought you said there's like certain um like verbiage that you use and there's certain tactics to be able to debate someone like properly okay um i'm not fully versed on it so i don't even want to like give

Speaker 1 information but he was like telling me about why it was like he didn't understand it. And I said, That's why you got to ask for help.

Speaker 1 But, like, if you're not going to fill your schedule with academics and clubs and things like that, then we need to figure out a job because you can't go out here at 18 years old and have no skills.

Speaker 8 Well, right. And he's not, and he's in ninth grade.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 1 So, like, I just want him to be able to, I want to set him up for the future.

Speaker 1 And if you're not going to have sports on any sort of like application or resume or something, like, you have to have skills from something. And I feel like debate is one of the best ones to have.

Speaker 5 Oh, God. I don't know that for sure, but I'm like making it up as I go.

Speaker 4 Oh, yeah. You would have succeeded in that.
Oh, for sure.

Speaker 1 And like, Isaac reminds me a lot of Tyler.

Speaker 8 Like, I reached out to you before. Remember when all that, I was like, I want to let you know it as a, like, you know, people, just, yeah, like

Speaker 8 people have these weird where they'll categorize them, they'll try to do all these things, but it's because I honestly feel like, and this is just my belief, but I feel like souls like Isaac are wiser.

Speaker 8 They may not be in age, but in experience, in wisdom, they just have a way. And like, I think people, like, they kind of like it.
They don't like it.

Speaker 8 They don't, and if they can't figure it out, they'll vilify it or they'll like categorize it or label it.

Speaker 1 It's everything that they stand for, and it like challenges their own insecurities, I feel. And so, like, Isaac will challenge any.

Speaker 1 Like, if you tell him we're made of stardust, he's gonna figure out why we're made of stardust. Where does that come from? Yeah, where did you get to that conclusion?

Speaker 1 Like, he wants to know about God, about religion, about all of the things.

Speaker 1 Um, he was asking me about insurance the other day, and he was like, Wait, so it's basically a scam.

Speaker 5 Is it no, it is, it is

Speaker 5 like, I'm moving to Europe. I'm like, okay, cool.

Speaker 1 All right, cool. Um, as long as you can be an interpreter over there, it's fine.
Lincoln's in basketball and soccer. Okay.
And then Lux and Creed are in soccer, basketball, wrestling, football.

Speaker 8 Oh, my God. Not all at the same time.

Speaker 5 They're all during different seasons.

Speaker 9 Okay, so

Speaker 8 Monday through Friday, you're all at practices, right?

Speaker 1 Monday through Friday, Isaac has all of his clubs are three days a week. So like

Speaker 1 three days out of the week. Okay.
And then Lincoln has, right now he has game and practice once a week, like a game on one day, a practice on another. So he's not in every day yet.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Lux and Creed are at a practice almost every single day.

Speaker 8 Oh my god.

Speaker 5 So it's like Monday through Friday.

Speaker 8 So is Elijah going over here and you're going over here? No.

Speaker 5 Right. Like how do you juggle it all?

Speaker 1 I think that I've confused people about the nanny thing. So like there's this whole controversy online about if I have nanny, if I have a nanny and how many nannies I have.
Whoa.

Speaker 8 What controversy is surrounding a nanny?

Speaker 1 Well, there was this huge like uproar about influencers and reality people that have nannies. And I had said, like, I am fully transparent when it comes to stuff like like that.

Speaker 1 And so I said I had a nanny. I did have a nanny for a long time.
But by nanny, what I meant was, I do not have a live-in nanny that helps us 24/7. That's what people seem to, they took it and run.

Speaker 1 And they were like, oh, Kale has a live-in nanny or nannies. No, I have a child care provider that comes to my home to watch my babies, the three babies, Monday through Friday from eight to four.

Speaker 8 Wait, so because I never even knew nannies live with people.

Speaker 8 I always thought, no, I always thought nannies, like you said, come, come, clock in, clock out, like during the hours that parents.

Speaker 1 I still have live-in nannies, and I did just.

Speaker 1 actually no what so actually that's like

Speaker 1 the more cost-effective um

Speaker 8 we'll talk about it later okay nanny living in the house is more yes that's right and au pair is actually more affordable than a nanny how did you find a nanny kale that you trusted yes

Speaker 1 i'm like well so that's the thing so she comes from eight to four she is literally a saint on this earth like truly everything so she's there eight to four but at four o'clock she clocks out she's done all Right.

Speaker 1 We do not have nights, we do not have weekends. And then I'm taking, I'm ripping and running for the sports.
Luckily for Isaiah, he's at in high school, and so he stays after school.

Speaker 1 I don't have to like go pick him up and then bring him back. So it's sort of like, okay, pick him up, drop Lincoln off.
Lincoln's at the age where I can start to drop him off.

Speaker 5 Right, right.

Speaker 1 I'll never miss a game if I don't have to. But then Lux and Creed, since they're at the sort of the same age, a lot of their things are on the same day and they're all signed up for the same thing.

Speaker 1 So I'm at the same location for both of them.

Speaker 5 Both of us are okay, yeah.

Speaker 1 And so luckily right now, everything's sort of on different like Lincoln sports right now are on different days than Lux and Creeds or they're at a different time. Got it.

Speaker 1 So I can go take the younger ones and go.

Speaker 4 I want to see how fucking crazy your calendar looks.

Speaker 1 Oh, I'll send you a picture.

Speaker 9 When this episode drops, I'll have a picture.

Speaker 8 Yeah, because we just have three in our chaos.

Speaker 1 I do. No, it's chaos, but I don't know what I would do if we were just home like and not doing anything.
Like we landed from Disney and I flew here. Right.
Right.

Speaker 1 I didn't even have 24 hours at home before I was already on another plane and ready to go.

Speaker 8 You keep saying all these, oh, there's a, you you keep saying all these random things that people think I'm, I got a nanny, people think I got a nanny catcher for the guy.

Speaker 9 I'm like, what the fuck's going on?

Speaker 1 The hate stands out and is so loud and I hate it. Like it drives me crazy because I don't know.
It does.

Speaker 8 Because you've said multiple things.

Speaker 9 I'm like, what are you saying?

Speaker 5 And I just feel like.

Speaker 1 If I clear it up enough, it'll go away. But it seems like I clear it up and it doesn't go away.
So I don't even know why I do it.

Speaker 8 But no, I kind of agree with that because even when she's gotten, we talked about the other day about how she got all this hate for, you know, her mental health and like, you know, all the stuff that she went through.

Speaker 8 And it's like, dude, if you knew Kate at all, you you would know.

Speaker 8 If you don't like her, something's wrong with you. I have to tell you that because I'm telling you, like, I don't know what she wouldn't hurt a fucking fly.

Speaker 4 So I'm like, I would probably try to save the fly.

Speaker 4 I would heal its wing and let him, you know, teach them how to fly again. Yes.

Speaker 1 And she's like family. Like, I don't even like to refer to her as a nanny because, but I also don't know how to, like, because she's not really like a mom to me,

Speaker 1 but she is family to me. Yeah.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 5 How long have you had her?

Speaker 1 She's only actually been working for me for about a year. But I know that.

Speaker 5 known her for like,

Speaker 1 I've probably known her for like

Speaker 1 seven years.

Speaker 5 Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 Like I've known her for a really long time. She was family to me before she worked for me.

Speaker 5 Okay, right.

Speaker 4 So how does someone go about, how did you find this person? I think that's what something me and Ty struggle with is I don't trust anybody with her.

Speaker 1 I'll tell you the agency that I went through first before I got my...

Speaker 1 I don't even, I don't like to call her a nanny because she's like family.

Speaker 8 We got to figure out a comfortable term for her that you like.

Speaker 9 Like I don't know what I'm talking about. Like we call her.

Speaker 4 I call my helper, my babysitter, my, you know.

Speaker 1 Well, the kids call her tata because that's like so call her like sort of like a grandmother yeah she's tata yeah she's tata okay and how did you meet tata um i was friends with her stepson for a really long time and then um stepson's her husband started working for me like doing handiwork around the house lawn work stuff like that yeah um he was like my handy guy but then he became literally like a dad to me and then became like a grandfather to my children

Speaker 1 so and then when his wife came to over from puerto rico that was how so it ended up being more like a friend like a family yeah you know yeah following the budget.

Speaker 5 You need to find one of those.

Speaker 1 I know, but I absolutely love her because she only speaks Spanish too. So, my kids are learning Spanish.
Oh, awesome. Um, she has a daughter that's the same age as Rio.
So, like, they're, so then

Speaker 1 they like hang out.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Yeah, because that, you know, that's something tying I struggle with. It's like, I don't trust anybody with my kids.

Speaker 1 No, and I would trust her with, I would trust her more than I would trust half the people that I am with all the time.

Speaker 8 And like, people don't really get it. They'll be like, oh, come out.
And it's like, dude, I can't. We'll find a babysitter.
I'm like, I don't have one.

Speaker 9 Our parents are shit.

Speaker 4 And like you said, they need weeks of notice. I can't you say, hey, can you watch all three of my kids tonight?

Speaker 1 They're like, I have a lot of kids. And like, I don't, the thing is that I don't leave Lux and Creed with anyone anymore.
Like, I used to have a nanny for them, but I don't leave them with anyone.

Speaker 1 So if Lux and Creed are not with Chris, they're not, I'm not going.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Right.
Count me out.

Speaker 1 I mean, like, I don't, not that I don't, I definitely trust Tata with them, but I don't leave, I don't put them on her either. No, right.

Speaker 8 But you, so you had a nanny before Tata. So you, and how long did you have that nanny for?

Speaker 1 Three years. Okay.

Speaker 9 So far, did you like that experience?

Speaker 8 Like, did you, how did you get that one?

Speaker 1 Um, also fell into my lap. So that was, I went to college with her son.
Got it. Needed a cleaning person.
She had a cleaning business. So she used to clean my house.

Speaker 1 And then she was laid off from her job. I hired her as a nanny, like a full-time nanny.
She didn't live with me or anything. Yeah.
But like full-time, I mean, like child care hours.

Speaker 5 Right.

Speaker 1 That one was like seven to three.

Speaker 4 So she still got to clock in, clock out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, 100%. And then

Speaker 1 that was a really traumatic falling out that I haven't really talked about yet. So it's just like it was like a long story.

Speaker 1 And I don't think that we ever, either one of us ever really got full full closure on that okay um and so there was it was a very public situation oh it was oh okay i didn't know that so um

Speaker 1 the experience for for two out of the three years i think was really good it's funny because you're like the cleaning we need we need things Where's our cleaning lady?

Speaker 5 I don't care. I want a cleaning lady.

Speaker 4 I'm overly

Speaker 5 all the time.

Speaker 8 We had a cleaning lady for like a little bit and we got so like, we felt so shameful for some reason. I would leave.

Speaker 5 Yeah, we would, we'd be like, oh, whoa, we got to get out of here.

Speaker 4 We were leaving. I would leave until we had the camera.

Speaker 5 I'm not preferred to leave on my house getting cleaned.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's weird. I don't want to just sit there and watch you clean my house.

Speaker 1 It feels like weird.

Speaker 9 Yeah, it's shameful.

Speaker 8 I'm like, I'm sorry. Oh, let me move that for you.
And they're like, no, it's my dominant. Oh, sorry.
I got to get out of here.

Speaker 5 I can't like clean up.

Speaker 1 Yeah, dude. I feel like I have gotten really lucky with child care.

Speaker 1 You've been cleaning a lady?

Speaker 5 Yeah, that's nice. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Damn,

Speaker 5 what do we want?

Speaker 4 I need something, somebody, someone to fall into my please reach out.

Speaker 5 No, don't.

Speaker 5 Actually, don't reach out.

Speaker 1 We don't trust you.

Speaker 5 They actually don't.

Speaker 1 The agency, they're like certified. They're like CPR certified.
Right. They have all these credentials.
They have like, there's like things that they have to go through. So I definitely.

Speaker 1 Because I did something.

Speaker 4 I did something on like care.com.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Don't do that.
I did that too. That was a

Speaker 4 see. And I got, and I paid for some other things.
And then eventually I just had this weird feeling about it.

Speaker 1 I was like, do your friends sign NDAs?

Speaker 4 No.

Speaker 8 No. Nope.

Speaker 1 Does anyone that comes into your life sign an NDA?

Speaker 5 No, hey, no. No, don't sign an NDA now.
Nope. No.

Speaker 1 Like, if you don't sign an NDA, we can't be friends, except for Becky. She's proved her loyalty.
I don't need an NDA from her.

Speaker 8 Listen, if I need an NDA, I don't want you around me.

Speaker 1 True. But I just feel like you don't know until shit hits the fans.

Speaker 4 That's why no new friends.

Speaker 5 No, then if this shit is. No new friends here.

Speaker 8 If the shit hits a fan, we're going to do this all publicly, bitch.

Speaker 5 We'll go all out. We'll just do it all.
We'll put it all out there. I mean,

Speaker 5 really? Really, really?

Speaker 8 You feel the need for NDAs.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 8 Because you've been fucked over by... friends or whatever you want to call it.

Speaker 5 Is that what it means?

Speaker 4 Well, so many people actually. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I'm not saying that I'm innocent, right? Like I definitely had a hand in like whatever the fallout was, but to go publicly is like next level because truly how I,

Speaker 1 my, my personal life is my business, unfortunately.

Speaker 5 Right, right.

Speaker 1 And so if you fuck with my business, my life, my personal life, you're actually affecting

Speaker 1 the way I'm able to provide for my children.

Speaker 9 So how do you separate that? How do you

Speaker 8 because we've adopted this kind of lifestyle, right? Like team, I mean, it is.

Speaker 1 And so that's like part of the reason why V and I went our separate ways because she didn't want to talk about co-parenting. And I'm like, but that is my livelihood.

Speaker 1 Like that's how I've built everything that I've built is through my personal life. My personal life is like.

Speaker 8 I guess now are you and Joe? Like you guys talk?

Speaker 1 We try not to.

Speaker 9 Oh, you try not to?

Speaker 9 Okay. And is that just because you guys are just

Speaker 1 see eye to eye on

Speaker 1 the same end goal. Okay.
But getting there is never the same. Okay.
Like we just do, we clash so hard and it's no shade to him. I think that he just has a very different

Speaker 1 way that you can do it.

Speaker 5 Oh, right. Like you guys deliver

Speaker 5 different delivery.

Speaker 1 I just, it's upsetting because it's always kills always the problem.

Speaker 4 You know what I mean? Like, I can see

Speaker 4 when that's not factual.

Speaker 1 And of course, I've had my hand. I've been doing that.
But you can't do what I'm just saying.

Speaker 5 But I'm just saying.

Speaker 4 Right. But I'm just saying.

Speaker 1 To get 100% of the blame all the time. Right.
It's exhausting.

Speaker 8 It is. Well, and the only way to clear anything up is just to be transparent.
This is what really happened.

Speaker 4 But it sucks because I can kind of feel like I've seen, you know, obviously people talk shit all the time. And I've seen some of those things.

Speaker 4 And it's like, I feel like what I'm hearing from you is that even when you do explain and you're being truthful and you're telling the truth, people still say, Oh, she's lying.

Speaker 4 They don't believe you, even though you're like, Well, and then eventually you have to get to a point where, like, I do, and I'm like, Well, believe whatever the fuck you want.

Speaker 5 That's where I'm at now.

Speaker 9 I said what I said. I know my worth.

Speaker 4 I know who I am as a person. I sleep great at night

Speaker 4 because I know, you know, like, who cares?

Speaker 1 And not even like the nitty-gritty details. I think there's a way to talk about things without actually explaining what the actual issue was.

Speaker 4 And there is, you know, it's as sad as it is. A lot of people do struggle with that.
And I think, you know, it's sad, but I completely see where you're coming from.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 8 Well, all you can do is just, here's what happened, move forward, whatever. It is what it is.

Speaker 4 Well, I definitely had more questions that I want to ask you, but I'll save that for a long time. We'll do a part time.

Speaker 5 We'll do part two.

Speaker 4 I will save that for a different time.

Speaker 9 Part two. Stay tuned.

Speaker 5 Hey.

Speaker 8 Blue monkey. No, but I mean, obviously, you know, me and Kate adore you.
And we just thank you so much for, you know, letting us, you know, do this and just helping us.

Speaker 5 And anything y'all need, I'm here.

Speaker 1 Me, Kristen, Sandra, Becky, you guys are all great.

Speaker 5 Chandler's great.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so anything you need, I'm here.

Speaker 8 I think it's good. We're all a little team, and we're all just gonna, we're all, yeah, I mean, it's

Speaker 4 fun, and that means

Speaker 4 that just means I get to see you more.

Speaker 5 Oh, yeah, no, I'm excited for that. We're having a lot of good times.

Speaker 1 The kids are gonna be out here like fucking polluting against us.

Speaker 7 Oh, thanks, Cale. Yeah, of course.
Thanks for having me.

Speaker 8 Ty break it down.

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