A Call For Change

1h 1m

Join Cate & Ty as they tackle some fan questions regarding navigating sensory issues with kids, porn in relationships and their journey as young parents. They also dive into a serious discussion about the state of America, touching on the events of Charlie Kirk's assassination and the ongoing gun violence plaguing the nation.

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Transcript

Fall is in full swing, and it's the perfect time to refresh your wardrobe with pieces that feel as good as they look.

Luckily, Quince makes it easy to look polished, stay warm, and save big without compromising on quality.

Quince has all the elevated essentials for fall.

Think 100% Mongolian cashmere from $50, and the quality, just as good, if not better.

By partnering directly with ethical top-tier factories and cutting out the middleman, Quince cuts out the middleman to deliver luxury-quality pieces at half the price of similar brands.

It's the kind of wardrobe upgrade that feels smart, stylish, and effortless.

I know for me, every Quince product that I have, I go to every single time because they're comfortable, stylish, and don't cost an arm and a leg.

And it's really become a one-stop shop.

Their denim is super comfortable and stretchy.

Their sweaters for fall are cozy and warm.

So nice.

I love a nice, cozy sweater.

Keep it classic and cozy this fall with long-lasting staples from Quince.

Go to quince.com slash breakitown for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

That's q-u-i-n-ce-e dot com slash breakitown.

To get free shipping and 365-day returns, quince.com slash breakitown.

And we're back live during a flex alert.

Oh, we're pre-cooling before 4 p.m., folks.

And that's the end of the third.

Time to set it back to 78 from 4 to 9 p.m.

What a performance by Team Team California.

The power is ours.

Well, I hope everybody has been having a good week so far.

Thanks again for catching another episode of Kate and Ty Break It Down.

You know, we like to break things down with you guys.

In today's episode, I feel like we have a lot of fan questions that I've gotten.

And also...

Any juicy ones?

Huh?

Any juicy ones?

I mean, they vary, you know.

Like, I didn't do like the

anonymous secrets anonymous.

Okay, okay.

You know, I just kind of asked people to ask us questions.

I think that's always fun.

Tyler and I also have planned, we need to make this happen.

People really want to see an episode with Nova.

All right, I'll do it.

I will.

I think it's smart.

Yeah, and I think Nova would love to be a part of it.

You know, we might have to record that like a nighttime episode when the other two are sleeping.

Yeah,

because they're in school.

Yeah, true, true.

You know?

Yeah, she'd probably love it, though, because she's always like, can I hang out with you guys?

Oh, gosh, yes.

Can I come in your bed?

No.

She would love it.

And so, Nova, this is Nova's third week, technically third week of school.

And yesterday she was like struggling.

She was just like talking about how she was stressed out.

But I think it's, and I told her, I said, listen, this is normal for a middle schooler.

Yeah.

And then think about it.

And also the fact that she's in middle school in fifth grade.

I was still at elementary school.

I was going on the playground still.

you don't even think about it and you still only have like one teacher you might switch every now and then right yeah randomly but like she's you know she's in the she's in the middle school she's in it and so i told her last yesterday when she was texting me at lunch and she's like i'm just stressed out she's like and then i went to the counselor's office and i'm like why what was so wrong what's wrong like why are you upset because she's like i was crying and she goes i'm just stressed out about school she's like and

Caddy really got to me yesterday.

Oh, she thought about Caddy.

And I was thinking about it.

Like she took Caddy's death so well.

I felt like she didn't take the time to like really feel her feelings.

And so now it's hitting her all of a sudden.

Yeah.

But I told her, I said, you know, grief does, it comes in waves.

Yep.

You know, and you have to just treat it like a like a passing by train.

You're just going to like view it, look at it, feel it, feel it, experience the wind that it's pushing and just

let it go.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And then I also, and so I tried to explain to her yesterday, I was like, you know, like school is important.

Yeah.

Your grades, they're important.

I was like, but just remember, like school is just school.

Do your best.

Try the best that you can.

If you have questions, ask and ask and ask.

Keep asking until it makes sense.

You know, like, don't stress out so much about it to where it's causing you.

Maybe she's like

getting more like conscious of just wanting to get A's and B.

You know what I mean?

I mean,

this is the first year where she does that.

Yeah, and this is the first time.

I mean, I never.

No, me neither.

I didn't give a shit.

That was bad.

I was like, listen, as long as I get a C, I'm good.

See, and I was kind of like, I'm just here to see my friends.

Yeah.

Listen, as long as I get a C and I'm passing, whatever.

Yeah, and that's kind of, I mean, we did tell her that, too, because she was like, well, what is a grade that, like, you know, what would be like considered bad?

And me and you both said like anything under a C.

And it's not under a C.

I mean, like, and like, you know, a C is good.

It's, it's, it's the bare minimum of passing.

Right.

You know what I mean?

So I told her, I was like, you know, it's up to you what, how you want to do it.

And she was like, well, I, I don't, I want to get.

an A, obviously, but a B is okay.

And then a C is like, I'm like, well, listen, it's up to you, like I said, I think she's getting to the point where she's actually getting kind of like, she's getting conscious of like what grades she has,

how that, how I think, how we feel about it,

you know, and I obviously we always talked about grades when she's in elementary school, right?

But I think she's feeling the bigger importance now that it's middle school, it's different than elementary school, you know, well, because in elementary school, it was like A, or like, oh, no, they have like T's or M's, like meets and exceeds, tries.

Like, it was never A, B, C, D, E, F.

Now it's like A B C's.

and so now I think she's just like oh

I'm like it's

normal but I also feel like you know Nova's a little different I think I wish I was more conscious when I was a kid I wish I cared more I wish I was like one of those kids was like gotta get A's and B's you know what I'm saying but I just didn't even give a shit but like when you came home from school every day would your mom ask you if you had homework yeah okay

she would say do you have homework I mean yeah I mean no I don't got no homework but it's crazy because this day and age like the kids can't lie and say they don't have homework I know because I have an app everything

It dings me when it's like, she has a grade loaded.

Like when she gets graded, like when her assignments get graded, I get a notification.

I love it.

It's crazy.

I love it because I would have been screwed as a kid.

I would have been so screwed if my guy had that.

Oh, Bankster.

Hey, man, chill out.

Come here.

We got to have the chihuahua up here.

That's because I hit my leg.

Because he's still skittish and he's yippee yappy yippi yappy.

Come here.

It's okay.

Sorry, guys.

Our dog is being wild.

Well, he's still new to us, too.

So all the new sounds and

he's like got the ear-piercing bark of a chihuahua.

He is the shakiest, he's scared, scared little dude I've ever met.

He's so scared.

But, yeah, so I just told Nova, I'm like, just try your best and ask questions and keep on asking until it makes sense to you.

And if it doesn't make sense, and I've always told her, too, like, if you're struggling in an area, like me and dad, we will get you tutors.

We'll get you whatever you need.

Remember, she had a little issue with math?

I had her, I got her tutor asa yeah you know i mean it's it's and that helped her so much it did it really did and she also felt more confident because i asked her how to tutor how do you like her she's like well i am learning stuff differently just like but that it gives me like a like it makes me confident that i can do it and i'm like all right well there you go yeah and so you know obviously you have to let us know if you're struggling so that way we can help you

she's you know she's a male schooler dude it's a whole different ballgame it is it is it's intense you know yeah i mean i can sit she's carrying her backpack in the morning she's like i got to carry all this i got to carry this to each class class.

And it's like, it's just a big, remember how that felt?

Yeah.

And she said yesterday too.

And I'm like, why were you getting so stressed?

She's like, well, this happened.

She goes, and then I couldn't get my locker open.

It was jammed.

Then that made me late to my first hour.

Oh, she was, oh, she didn't tell me she was late.

Yeah.

Oh, she was tripping.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

But also tell your teacher that.

Like, I could not get my locker open.

You know, they,

I mean, that whole school needs new lockers.

I know.

Dude, and they have bolts in it.

They have screws.

And that Noah told me about the one time.

She's like, I put a pencil in the hole.

She's like, because I figured if I stuck the pencil in there and pushed it up, it'd be easier.

She goes, I did it.

It snapped and it smacked me in the face.

I was like, oh, my God.

Yeah,

she's experiencing it.

Yeah, so we definitely need to do an episode with Nova.

I think that would be interesting.

Yeah, so anyone listening, like, you know, give us, message us, DM us.

I don't know.

Maybe we'll make a little.

I might do a question box for Nova Levin.

Yeah, for Noah, for the Nova episode.

Yeah.

I would like to hear what.

And plus, I want to ask her things too.

Like, you know, what has it been like for you being a child that is born on TV and growing up on TV?

Like, what is that like for you?

Like, all sorts of different questions.

And Nova's very open-minded and very, like,

she'll tell you anything.

Yeah, you ask her if you want to ask.

We'll screen it as a parents.

And, you know,

obviously, but yeah, absolutely.

We will be screening that crap.

But I think it'd be interesting.

Yeah.

I wanted to pull up some of these questions.

Why stay married to someone who hates you?

Well, I feel like if this person is,

why stay married to someone that hates you?

You don't.

Right.

I agree.

You don't stay with anyone who hates you.

You don't hang out with anyone who hates you.

Right.

I mean, you don't be around anyone that hates you.

They're going to suck the energy right out of you.

That's okay.

Especially if you're feeling like they hate you or something.

I'm out.

Like, are you kidding me?

There's no way that that is

going to happen.

Wow, that's a weird question.

I feel like it's kind of a weird question, but why?

No, you just don't.

There's no why.

You just don't do it.

No.

You know?

Yeah, that's weird.

I wouldn't want to be with any of you.

Yeah.

No.

I don't need to.

I'm out.

Yeah, I'm out.

I think it's different.

We can not agree on something or, you know, have different opinions on certain things, but dude.

Yeah, but if you literally

hate me and no, then I'm doing you a favor by leaving.

Yeah.

Think about it.

If you hate me so much, I'm doing you a favor by saying, I do not want you to be.

with anyone that you hate or around anyone that you hate so i'm gonna leave that's kind of remember i what i say about like i would never want to be around somebody or even put myself in a group, anything, if I felt like not that they didn't like you.

Yeah, but why would I do that?

What am I doing here?

Well, it makes no sense.

I'm not going to surround myself with people that don't like me.

Well, yeah, and also, I mean, like I said, it's different if I'm going in there actively trying to debate a topic or have a civil discussion.

Right, but just knowing we don't agree, but like, dude, I'm not going to be able to do that.

Just to hang out somewhere or be married to somebody that hates you?

Hell no.

That's crazy as hell.

Yeah.

You're robbing yourself and robbing that person who hates you.

Somebody said, what was your first thought of Caitlin when you first met her?

Oh my God.

My first thought was like,

I mean, my honest, what?

My first thought was, dang, y'all, her tits are you.

But, like,

okay, that's me being honest.

You'd have gotta, I mean, I was 13 years old, you know, boy, whatever.

So I'm like, dang.

Anyway, but that's.

She's got big old titties.

Tickle bitties, man.

Holy shit.

Especially when you're, I mean, you're young.

Oh, God, even saying that loud.

It's like 13.

Mm-hmm.

And I'm thinking about titties.

What's wrong with me, bro?

Anyway

Okay, that was like the first superficial thing, but then like your your laugh you had blonde hair split down the middle you had those rubbery tie yes the jelly bands it had I don't even know you guys would twist them a certain way together so like two colors.

Yep.

Yeah, and you had a t-shirt that said I'm with the drummer and I was like, yeah.

I was like, you know, and at that point I had long hair.

I saw just like, dude, I don't know.

I was just like, damn.

I said,

that's a woman.

That's what I thought.

My brother's like, damn.

You know, because at that age, everyone's like, you know,

look a specific way.

Yeah, see, I guess I didn't look like a little girl anymore.

Hell no.

So I was like, damn, dude.

But,

yeah, I don't know.

I was like, immediately attracted.

I was just like, all right, I want to.

Get to know.

Yeah, I could tell because every day in music class, he was trying to do something to make me laugh or sit next to me in the movie.

It worked like a charm.

I could sense it.

The first, even though you were dating some other dude, whatever.

But I never cheated on that dude.

No way.

I was trying to.

But I remember, like,

I don't know.

I remember sensing it.

The first couple of times that we talked or joked and I made you laugh or whatever.

And I was like, oh.

Like you carrying around Dean like a backpack, backpack.

Yeah, yeah.

Dean.

Yeah, yeah.

I'll never forget that.

And then making you laugh more and more.

I was just like, all right, yeah.

Yeah, and then he showed up.

Then he came to my birthday party.

And my boyfriend at the time that I was dating was there too.

And so Tyler was there and everything.

And then when the party was over at night, he like called me and he was like, hey, you know, can I spend the night?

And because you were having a group that your mom let a whole big bash sleep over with all the all the people, all of our, all the kids hanging out.

Yeah.

Can I spend the night too?

And I was like, oh, let me ask my mom.

Well, I didn't really ask my mom.

Let me ask your mom.

Nope.

I was too nervous.

I was so nervous.

And I thought for sure your mom said no.

And I never forget thinking like, dude, what the fuck?

She lets all these rain.

What the hell?

What's the, what?

Like, I was pissed.

Yeah, I know.

So I was so nervous.

I was like, oh, no, she said no.

Nope.

She said no.

All because you were nervous because you knew.

Yeah, exactly.

You was tested too.

I was making you laugh.

And then eventually things led to another and I broke out off with my boyfriend.

And then a few weeks later, Tyler was grabbing my hand in the middle of the yeah.

I was like, all right, this is my moment.

And it was so funny back then, literally.

Like how you would hold hands.

If she doesn't let go, she wants to be with me.

Yeah, don't look at each other.

Are we holding hands or hands?

Yeah, we're holding hands all day.

So little and innocent.

You know, funny.

It is funny.

And here we are.

And here we are.

18 years later.

Fall is in full swing, and it's the perfect time to refresh your wardrobe with pieces that feel as good as they look.

Luckily, Quince makes it easy to look polished, stay warm, and save big without compromising on quality.

Quince has all the elevated essentials for fall.

Think 100% Mongolian cashmere from $50.

Washable silk tops and skirts, and perfectly tailored denim, all at the prices that feel too good to be true.

I'm eyeing their wool coats.

They look designer-level, but cost a fraction of the price.

And the quality, just as good, if not better.

By partnering directly with ethical top-tier factories and cutting out the middleman, Quince cuts out the middleman to deliver luxury quality pieces at half the price of similar brands.

It's the kind of wardrobe upgrade that feels smart, stylish, and effortless.

I know for me, every Quince product that I have, I go to every single time because they're comfortable, stylish, and don't cost an arm and a leg.

And it's really become a one-stop shop.

Their denim is super comfortable and stretchy.

Their sweaters for fall are cozy and warm.

So nice.

I love a nice, cozy sweater.

Keep it classic and cozy this fall with long-lasting staples from Quince.

Go to quince.com slash breakitown for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns.

That's q-u-i-n-ce-e.com slash breakitown to get free shipping and 365-day returns.

Quince.com slash breakitown.

Um, are you and Tyler going to have another baby?

No, man.

I am snipped, you guys.

Yeah.

They even covered this, I think, on.

Oh, they didn't cover it in the show.

Yeah, they did.

I think they did.

Yeah, they did.

Yeah.

Yeah, dude.

I was sniped.

I'm snipped.

Right.

Snip.

No more babies.

I mean, we definitely have the thoughts every so often.

Crazy thoughts.

I would love to have another baby, you know, especially with all of them getting older and Ryan getting older.

And I'm like, oh my God, they're so cute.

And I would love to have another baby.

And then all of a sudden, you got...

Ryan and Vada beating the shit out of each other and screaming and crying because somebody's got their toy or whatsoever.

And I'm like, yeah, nah.

Yeah, it's like like the feeling goes, you get all warm and fuzzy.

You get risky.

Oh, and they're like, Mom, Dad!

Scream here.

Yeah.

Nope.

Nope.

No more kids.

No, we're done.

We're done.

No, I mean, if something were to happen crazy,

I would probably cry because I'm in my later, like, early, late 30s.

Early, late 30s.

Yeah, you know, like not super late, but yeah, we're done having babies.

Yeah.

Snippity snip, snip.

Snip, snip.

All done.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But I do.

Oh, God.

Especially when you see other babies and they're fresh and brand new and you know they are.

And it's like,

and it's crazy to think about where it's like,

even though I know I wouldn't say that, I would never do that.

Do you know what I'm saying?

In my mind.

In my mind, I'm just like, dude, like.

I want to hold your baby.

I want to hold you, baby.

Yeah, I know.

Babies are cute.

I had one this morning actually dropping Rye off at school.

Oh, really?

And she carried on.

She was carrying me as a binky.

Mom.

And he went and just hugged the teacher.

He's not going to school.

He's like, oh, hug.

Cause the other one hugs.

She's like, oh, hug.

That's cute.

And he's like, bye.

I know.

And I was like, dude.

Babies are so cute.

But yeah, no, I'd probably cry because, you know,

being 33 or 34, having a baby, unless you'll do it.

That's what I'm saying.

And I think we had a good,

we stuck to our goal, our plan.

We said, all done after 30, it's a wrap.

Yeah.

Do you know what I'm saying?

And I think we just.

And if something were to happen, then that's just like

divine

intervention, you know, but I would probably cry at first.

I would too.

I mean, we accept it, obviously, whatever.

Obviously, and we would love it, you know what I mean?

But like, damn, yeah,

um, how was it being parents at such a young age?

Um, I feel like we were definitely young parents, but like still considerably young when we had Nova.

We're 23,

so

right, yeah, 23.

You're 23.

I guess it is kind of, you're right,

yeah, I guess you're right.

It is, it is young.

Honestly, I wouldn't, I I personally, I wouldn't, I liked being a younger parent because I felt like we were so much just

more energetic.

We're more like, let's go play, let's go to the park, let's do all these things.

Um, and also, it's like my one of my thinking processes was like, when I'm in my 40s, it's gonna be my time.

So, yeah, that's what I'm saying.

I want to see Caitlin dancing at the bars without her kids.

You know what I mean?

No, I'm just kidding.

But honestly, it's been good.

I feel like, you know, you also like grow up with your children and our children teach us things on the daily.

Like we actually learn from our children too about random different things.

I mean, I wouldn't have it any other way only because it's like we are at a stage in our life where Noah's at, she's entering, you know,

young womanhood and stuff and we're freshly out of it.

Not really fresh, but we're still like young enough to like, I still get, I understand the social pressures I feel like that she's under.

I can, you know, I feel like we have more.

right and Vedas just coming into that a little bit.

Yeah.

However, the flip side of that is that

the older you have a kid, I think the more experienced and wise you are and how, and you don't freak out about a lot of stuff.

And, you know, you just, you're more patient, you're slower, you know,

slower paced.

And I think

there's pros to cons.

Yeah, there are.

Because when you get older, like you realize that even

you get older and you like,

you realize that time is just so

not a lot.

Yeah, you don't just don't have a lot of time.

Sure.

So you're able to like understand that when you're at an older age and really makes you like forces you almost to be present with the kids and just like really soak it all up.

So, I mean, I get it.

I understand having them later in life.

Also, too, if you want to have it later in life, I know people want to have certain stuff in place.

I want to have my first house.

Of course,

but sometimes it don't work out like that.

Right.

Yeah, I can understand wanting to be prepared and all the things, of course, you know.

I want to know, though, like honestly, like how many damn kids are planned and they can't lie.

Parents, I want to do like a survey, but can't lie.

Right.

You know what I mean?

Like really, how many are actually planned?

But I feel like even the ones that we planned ourselves, even when you get those two lines on a test, you're still freaking the fuck out.

And even when you plan it, you realize,

you know, a couple years in, whatever, that you're still growing too.

You're still learning.

So you can think that you're like, got it all figured out to a T on a, on a piece of paper plan.

But then it changes.

I remember when we first had Nova and it was, well, when I was pregnant, we were like, we're going to do cloth diapers.

She's not going to use a binky whatsoever because, and we're going to breastfeed.

Idiot.

And I remember telling your mom.

Idiot.

I remember we're talking to your mom and she's like, okay.

Years down the road, his mom is like, I knew that shit was going to fly out the window.

She's like, but I just let you guys think what you wanted to think.

And that's actually great when you think about it.

Like that, that comes, that's the wisdom I'm talking about.

I think think a day later, she had a binky because I was like, fuck this.

And we never use cloth diapers, not once, not even once.

But, um, but I remember uh actually feeling better about it because when I uh looked it up about babies or whatever, like it's it's a soothing thing.

Binky's not like a just

tie.

You know, there he is

going down a deep dive about what binkies are beneficial to them.

Well, no, and what it does to the neural pathways as they're soothing themselves, and it's fine, bro.

Yeah, give the kid the binky.

Yeah, I don't think you know, four-year-olds should be walking around binkies but you know whatever teach their own i don't know the kid but yeah i mean god damn don't fear the binky love the binky well then it's funny because nova who was it was nova and raya they actually got rid of their binkies on their own beta it was like we had to take it away she loved it but nova got to the point she was like eight nine months old like sitting up and everything and she'd be fussing we'd put it in there and she

spit it out she knew we were trying to keep her coffee yeah right and then you put it in there and she'd like you won't spit it out silence me yeah and so then eventually we just got rid of of them all and that's literally how she got rid of it same thing with rise she just eventually just kept spinning it out spinning on like well i'm taking it away now then until it becomes an issue and then i remember seeing it in her crib like she wasn't even using it no so i'm like all right you're done you're done now veda she was like that was her soothing thing she loved it was obsessed with it i was so nervous to take it away

was it no it was actually way easier than i thought i was i thought she was gonna freak out you were tripping and i was like babe we gotta do it now i know but i'm sold so bad no

i know she loves it.

Remember when I said, I said, we can't have one of those like weird old binky kids.

Oh, I know.

I don't want to have some old fucking big old giant kid with a binky.

Yeah.

No, I know.

Now, I know there are some, there are some kids.

There are some kids out there, too, though, that have like disabilities and stuff that use binkies.

That's different.

You know what I'm talking about.

No, I know.

I just wanted to clarify for people.

Like, I understand.

There's certain, obviously, reasons why a child loves to have a binky and needs one, you know?

But we're talking about

saying, right.

Like, Veda, she was gonna be freaking like four or five years old, stuck in on a binky.

It's like, no, I gotta take it away.

Yeah, we had to do it.

Yeah, and I remember being like, even if you didn't like it, I was like, I have to do it.

I know.

She's my daughter.

I cannot have the old binky kid.

I was like, I'm not sure what I'm doing for her because she loved it so much.

No, of course they love it, you know?

Yes.

But it was different because we never experienced them not wanting to get rid of it.

You know, Noble wanted to get rid of it, so it was easy.

No, she really did.

She wanted to get rid of it.

Okay, so when you were growing up, what was your dream job?

Well, I wanted to be a cop at first.

I mean, because it was the closest thing I could be to Batman.

So that's funny.

Commissioner Gordon, that's where I'm going to be.

That's funny because mine always like, I wanted to be a canine officer.

Because the canine.

Yeah.

That's fucking dope.

I'm going to sick my dog on your ass, you know?

Like, yeah.

And I remember when I would tell my mom then, she's like, she's like, I would be so nervous if you were a cop.

You know?

Well, because people do fucked up things to cops.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay, obviously.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I thought it was like a motherfucker.

What the fudge was that?

That was our cat jumping on their thing.

Oh, my gosh.

But yeah, I always wanted to be a canine officer and like, or a veterinarian.

But then when I found out how much math you need to know to be a veterinarian, I was like, fuck that shit because I suck at math.

Dude, I'm horrible at math.

But yeah, I would have loved that.

I remember back in the day, too, I always had a dream of being like a

investigator.

Like a forensic person.

Yeah, like a murder investigator.

Forensic.

Yeah.

But then I thought of like the really, I mean, all of it's got to be hard, but kids.

No, I listened to.

You know, like little kids and stuff, I don't think I'd be able to handle that.

Like, and I give props to people that can go out there and, because I know it takes a toll on them too, mentally.

But, like, dude,

I don't think I'd be able to handle seeing little kids.

And I think when you're little, you think, like, oh, I'll be a, you know,

I'm going to be a detective then.

Right, and I'm going to end detective.

Catches killers, you know?

But, dude, you got to see some, you see some wild ass shit.

Yeah, that, you know, like stuff that's going to traumatize you.

Right.

Or Or like the murder suicides, or people are like killing themselves and their whole family.

Like, I mean, like I said, like I said, I give props to people that do that job because I know it has to play

a role on like your mental health.

Pretty much every cop should just be in therapy, and it should be free, yeah, and it should be free, you know, it should be completely paid for,

yeah, subsidized for sure.

This is a good one: advice for parents of kids with sensory issues because we have one like that, and people saying

it's so.

I don't know if she's not saying if it's a boy or a girl, it's a brat thing, and it isn't real.

Like, they're just a brat.

No, no, guys, listen, that's sad.

No, and I, I,

I think if people are not exposed to children that have these sensory issues, you're not going to really understand.

And maybe you will think, oh, little bratty kid.

I'm sorry, if anybody were to come to me and say Vada's being a brat because she's having a sensory freakout, I'm going to probably fucking smack the shit out of you.

Well, I mean, no, for real, but I.

You know, like, who the fuck fuck are you to say that?

But they don't know if it's a sensory issue, as I'm saying, from an outside, they're looking at a kid having a, you know what I'm saying?

They're not gonna know it's a sensory thing, they're just gonna think, oh, this kid's completely freaking out, having a fit.

I've had to say at places before, like, you know, she struggles with sensory issues.

Oh, really?

I mean, absolutely.

I will voice that.

I mean, of course, of course, I agree with voicing it.

I'm just saying, um, and that it isn't real.

How do you know it's not real?

I'm the parent.

I know, and I had her diagnosed or looked at, you know what I mean?

And sensory issues can look so different.

Like, Vadel will freak out like if she's we have a big dog he dribbles water on the floor if she steps in it she's freaking out if there's a certain smell in the house that she doesn't like she will literally cry and freak out yeah um loud noises she doesn't like it and it's not i i think and when see

we're the parents of that child that has a sensory problem so you don't

If you're not around it, you're not exposed to it, and your friends, you don't know anything about it, I get why you would think, oh, what a brat little kid.

Right.

It's like, but that's why I think it's important for parents.

I'm telling you right now, man, it's ruthless out there.

Parent against parent.

I'm the right way.

You're the wrong.

That's not good.

This is a good.

And it's like, dude, you

are not with this child 24-7.

Right.

I'm not, I can maybe have an opinion and think in my head, like, oh, wow, that kid's being blah.

But at the end of the day, I don't know what kind of day that kid had.

I don't know what kind of day mom had.

I don't know what kind of day dad had.

I don't know anything other than what I'm seeing right now for two damn seconds of this whole family unit's life.

You know what I'm saying?

So I can't, you know, it's wrong for me to even label the child as anything other than, oh, wow, that's their child.

And I pray for the parent.

You know what I'm saying?

Like,

I'm sorry.

You know what I mean?

Like, when you look, almost when we became parents and got on airplanes,

I'm like, I don't even, the kid could be curdled, screaming, crying.

I feel so bad for the mom.

Oh, yeah, because you know she's stressing.

They're stressing hard.

Which I honestly feel like

in those moments, guys, if you're ever on an airplane or you see a parent struggling with a kid that's having a fit or something like that, please either ignore it completely.

Like, that's fine.

Especially if you have a picture of it.

But also, I think saying something a little encouraging to the parents.

So you're doing a really good job.

Or, you know, you see the ones where

some people take the babies and like walk for them.

And

the moms are the moms are like on the bottom of the bag.

But I think nowadays people are like, don't touch my baby.

It is nowadays.

Oh, really?

Oh, yeah.

I've seen videos nowadays, too.

Like the flight attendants will

cuddle the babies and walk them.

And the mom is like, that person was literally an angel.

Yeah, so I feel like if you ever see a parent, instead of judging them, like whatever, and thinking whatever you want to think, I think honestly, just going up to like a struggling parent and just being like, you're doing good.

You're doing good.

Yeah.

It's okay.

Because that's so nice to hear somebody.

Isn't it?

Because when your kids freak out, your parents are stressed and you're to drop the grocery.

You drop, you know, whatever's going on.

The kids having a freak out.

And then someone else just comes up and just says, hey, like, you're just, you're doing a good job.

It's okay.

Yeah.

Love that.

Do you need help?

It feels good.

It does.

Even if you say, like, no, I i don't want your help creepy stranger inside it's

like you see me at least someone sees me in this area right basically i'm trying my best you know people are staring and just whispering and

um what are your views on watching porn when in a relationship

uh

your face

I feel like if we're not watching it together and we don't watch it

that's weird or if you guys have some kind of agreement like maybe the girl likes to watch it and the guy doesn't so the guy's like hey if you're gonna watch watch it, just let me know.

So at least I have the option to join or refuse and not join and let you have your good time.

You know what I'm saying?

Or vice versa.

You know what I'm saying?

But if you're like secretly watching porn or something.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

Also, if you're doing it, if you're doing that and not engaging in physical intimacy, big, big problem.

Yeah, right.

Because automatically, the other partner is going to be like, something's wrong with me.

You know what I'm saying?

Or I'm not fulfilling something's not right.

You know, so I think it's like, you, you, I say, listen, all couples just invite the other ones like hey i'm feeling a little frisky you want to come over watch this thing with me real quick all right cool yeah and then you can imagine like watching porn on the tv and then like getting hot and heavy

well

but we're different because honestly i i would we would get what two seconds into it all right i'm good you know what i mean

like weird i don't know

but to each their own like hey if that's what but i also feel like i but i also think you need to respect the other partner if they're like, hey, I have a problem with this.

Like, say, like, like I said, one person likes to watch it, another person doesn't at all.

Like, how do you

allow freedom, sexual freedom for your partner, but also respecting your own self?

That would be hard.

I don't know.

And I think that's when it kind of comes to a thing: like, you got to have a compromise.

Either you involve me in it, or, uh,

or I don't know, because I feel like, what's the core issue with it?

What would be the core issue?

It would be jealousy, would it be

insecurity?

Would it be?

So, is it really your partner that's causing the problem, or is it you, or is it just triggering an internal thing you have?

I don't know.

I just feel like porn can be very unhealthy.

I think it's really unhealthy.

Honestly, I say fuck that shit.

It's horrible.

It's just not good.

I don't really.

It's not how real love is.

It just ain't it.

It ain't it.

It ain't overproduced.

It's obnoxious.

Yeah.

Honestly, you know what I'm for?

I'm for actual.

How about storytelling?

How about like, if you're going to show sex in a media form, show it real and not overproduce.

Show it like with a real story, passion and love.

Is there a girl that does that?

Yeah, there is.

And she's gotten awards.

She's like one of the, and she actually, like, I just saw an article about it.

I don't really know too much about it, but yeah, she makes like kind of like artistic films just using real sex.

And it's like, dude,

there you go.

That's kind of where I feel like if you're going to put it on a media form.

It's for the shift shift.

It should shift because I'm worried about kids being raised today.

Well, look.

Like I just said, I was 13.

Oh, look at the big old.

Like, I couldn't imagine if we had access that the kids have now in our pockets.

So, what does that do?

I think what it does is it releases too much dopamine too fast,

too exotic, and too chaotic all on one.

Well, and it gives you a false reality of what sex is.

Exactly.

You know what I mean?

And that's harmful.

That's why I feel like if you're going to do it, it makes guys feel like, oh my God, my penis isn't big enough, or I'm not doing the right thing.

Or girls are.

It's not moaning like that.

Yeah, the girls are like, oh, my God, I don't look like that.

Oh, my God.

I'm not making noise.

I i don't like that yeah or yeah it just what it creates just a horrible

it's just a bad relationship to have

yeah i don't but if you're gonna be into it and you like it and there are people who are it's cool i'm all for it yeah it's just

you gotta make sure you have the boundaries with the other person and it works out and honestly like it may come to a point where it just hey i like porn and you don't agree with this we gotta we're not we can't be together Because it's something that I'm not willing to give up.

It's going to keep triggering stuff in the relationship.

Yeah, but that's why I kind of feel like instead of throwing the towel in, figure out, first off, why do you feel like you need to watch it?

And then on the other hand,

why is it triggering for you that they want to watch it?

And then start there.

And then, yeah.

Right.

You know what I'm saying?

Like, I don't know.

Yeah, I think I'm meeting I mean, I don't, whatever, people who do it, but like me, I'm not into it.

You're not really into it.

It's like, so I'm glad we're just,

yeah, but I also feel like me and you aren't, uh, we're not lacking anything in that department.

Yeah.

It's actually probably one of our most

one of the most most positive things that we have.

You know what I mean?

Like it's, it's a very important thing.

We know how important it is.

We talked.

We talked about it.

You know what I mean?

We established the importance of it.

And I think that's what it comes down to.

We both like it.

So

it's a win-win.

Yeah.

So, like, I said, me and you, maybe we could be, oh, that's chai.

We would make it two minutes.

And then we'd be all over each other.

You know what I'm saying?

It'd be like, all right, turn on something else for background noise.

Where's a true crime doc at the back?

As you're getting asked, Sally, it was phone mom.

Literally, that does happen, though.

But yeah, I don't know.

I feel like, but I think that topic is going to probably

get worse as time goes on only because of the access that younger kids have.

Yeah, and it's just in their pocket.

It's just one Google search away.

But I also think people should know the realities of what it's doing to the brain as you're watching.

It's not good.

It's not good, man.

No, it's not healthy.

And it was different.

When I was younger, it was magazines, still images.

And you had to sneak it.

You know what I'm saying?

There's nothing.

Right.

Kind of touched touched a little nipple on fucking HBO Max is about all you're gonna get.

Whoa, you know, but

yeah, but I mean, I feel actually feel really bad for the kids nowadays because I think there's pressure to probably watch it.

And think about social groups back then: like, oh, you don't know what a whatever is, you never did that, you know what that means?

Like, you know, the kids, like, oh, I don't know what that means.

No, I don't know what that means.

So they're going to go home and they have the ability to look it up.

You know what I'm saying?

I mean, that pulls up a hole.

So that way they feel like they fit in or know what they're talking about.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

So I think it's, I feel, dude, I feel horrible for the kids being race with that.

Because technology can be hell, not beneficial.

Yeah, that's crazy.

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I know we haven't talked about it yet, but I know that we were going to.

And somebody did bring up the question, too.

What?

I mean, it was a sad day in America yesterday, regardless of how you feel about this person or his morals and or even his beliefs.

Somebody asked, you know, what our thoughts are on Charlie Kirk.

I saw the video, which I kind of wish I wouldn't have watched it because it literally made me sick to my stomach.

Do I agree with his beliefs and the way that he talks about things?

No.

Did I like him as a person?

No.

But like Tyler and I had the conversation yesterday, he also just, he did not deserve to die.

His children did not deserve to lose their dad.

His wife has lost her freaking husband.

I mean, it's very sad.

And I think it's sad that our country is in the way, is in the form of what it is.

We should be allowed to have different views and different opinions.

I mean, it's America.

And feel safe.

Yeah.

Freedom of speech, like all of the things.

And for him to be doing what he always has done, which is debating, you know, young, like youth

and people in college, and to get brutally murdered in cold blood in front of thousands of people, in front of his wife, and in front of his children, it is so

sad and disturbing.

It took me aback for a very long period of yesterday and today.

Well, I think honestly, like what happened yesterday was just devastating, unnecessary, and it's

unfortunately a perfect example of just how divided everybody is.

And not just divided in politics or policies, divided in just this lack lack of compassion and empathy, in this lust for hate and to and to and to fuel the hate by getting with other people.

And that it's just like

we are lost

in our

natural,

empathetic, tribal human nature.

We're lost in it.

I don't know where it's at.

I don't know where it's been.

But it is killing people and hatred is is causing so much turmoil and it and it's at the, we're at the point, it's literally killing people, innocent people, hate, hatred,

difference in opinion, difference in beliefs.

That's what I mean.

It's like, you know, killing people.

This is, this is insane, this is literally insanity because that same day, Colorado,

school shooting, like literally watching the news and it went from, oh my God, he just got assassinated to now we're going to break your news, we're going to go to Denver.

I'm like, this is America, bro.

This is exactly where we're at.

What the fuck is going on?

This is is America.

What the fuck is going on?

Where are people's soul?

Where is it?

The woman on the bus.

The woman on the bus got stabbed

in broad daylight.

For no fucking reason.

Well, you know,

he quoted.

He quoted in there.

And this is bigger than just, hey, it's racism.

It's socioeconomic.

It's a lot.

It's a lot of layers.

Because he literally said on that video, which I had to confirm, I was like, what is going on?

He said, got that that white girl, got that white girl.

What the fuck, bro?

So, and this is going, uh,

like, I am

Hortman, Democrat, she just got, dude, dude, yeah,

she was a Democratic at her house,

her and her husband a couple weeks ago, brutally murdered, brutally murdered.

So, and the thing is, too, is this.

What is happening?

And that was, and listen, and this was by a guy who was divisive in politics, you know, ideologies and what he believed.

He went to her house, freaking shot her in cold blood.

Charlie Kirk getting assassinated in front of all these kids.

It's like, dude,

the woman on the bus,

even just

all the innocent children

over the world that are just getting demo.

That's what I mean.

And first I want to start by saying, too, it's like, there are so many people in this world that I don't agree with their beliefs.

I don't agree with their morals or values or they're different than mine.

And never once have I thought about, well, I'm just going to murder that person because I don't like what they speak about or what they preach about or whatever.

But I think, and number two is there is a gun problem in the United States of America.

Are we ever going to wake the fuck up?

Okay.

He just, you know, Charlie got assassinated yesterday.

We have kids being killed.

brutally murdered in schools.

We have, it's just like something needs to change.

Well, and I, and I think this goes back to even like, and I think when we talk about it being a problem, I think based off of what Charlie Cooker said in the past, he's okay with this kind of thing.

He literally said there are certain deaths that need to be, that need to happen, unfortunately.

And then it took his own life

to have guns in this country and have this in this freedom, quote-unquote, freedom.

And I,

the irony to that is so, like, my brain is like, whoa, like the video that I saw of him saying, unfortunately, gun deaths is going to happen for citizens who are allowed to carry.

He said there's going to be so many deaths.

There's going to be so many deaths every year.

Yeah, every year.

And that's a price.

It's worth.

He said, it's literally in quotations, it's worth it.

And all I thought about was, Charlie, your kid, your daughter,

your daughter experiencing the grief and loss of not having you is not worth it.

She just witnessed it.

Your wife's immense grief and loss was not worth it and i really firmly believe yeah on the other side of this i think his soul is saying it was not worth it because i'm telling you there's no way you can look at um the mother of that elementary school shooting that happened so many years ago and say you know what it's worth it it's right it had to happen so i can't i'm sorry that it had to happen but we we really like our guns we want our guns because yeah and you're right and i bet you right now his wife and his children are saying no it's not worth it i just lost my husband.

I literally watched my husband get assassinated in front of me.

My children watched it.

His children deserve to have their dad.

His wife deserved to have her husband.

Like, I don't understand why someone automatically.

Yeah, it's sad, babe.

I know.

Yeah, I mean, Melissa, Melissa Hortman, the girl who she,

like, what are we doing?

I don't know what we're doing.

You guys, we've got, listen, all this stupid shit, and I swear, social media is just fueling it intensely.

This hatred, this divide, and this fucking stupid shit that we're so obsessed with is not helping.

It's creating such hatred that is so toxic and infectious that it is killing people.

It is taking children's fathers.

It is killing children.

It is taking children away from parents.

Yeah, sad.

It is, dude.

We have got to, everyone's needs to just chill out.

No, some children.

Something needs to change.

Well, no, I mean, chill out with your obsession with having this, this, this right to bear arms.

Just listen.

Other countries, this is not happening.

Yeah.

Okay?

This is not happening.

No, it's not.

They're not shooting schools up in other.

That's like what I saw one person talk about in the UK.

He's like, we had one massive school shooting, which killed so many kids.

And that was it.

That was it.

The UK made all these strict laws.

You had to turn in your guns, like all this shit.

So I think.

And he goes, and we've never had one ever since then.

Well, I know Australia did the same thing.

Yeah.

And

listen, you can agree or not agree.

That's fine.

But this is just what I, but this is what I believe.

I really believe that we need to shift our priorities, okay?

Are we going to protect this right?

And how many people are going to die for this right?

So many people.

Literally, how many?

How many more?

What is the number?

There has been 300 mass shootings in 2025 already, over 300 and counting.

Well, then what the final when you woke up this morning, you were in the kids.

Oh my God, I woke up this morning.

Guys, this is how, this is why, I mean, all of it's intense for me right now, obviously for everybody.

But like, I woke up, got the kids ready for school on my local news.

In Michigan, as I'm getting the kids ready, on top of, you know, watching the news about Charlie Kirk and all the stuff happening with that, and they're updating everything, and then all of a sudden they go, Oh, live breaking news now.

Uh, three people shot in Port Huron.

What?

That's pretty close to us.

And I was like, What the f?

And you said that there was kids that got shot?

Yeah, there was,

well, that's the last thing I heard.

I don't know if it's true.

I don't, I'm not, but for it to be on the news, and they're talking about it.

Yeah, like every

single day, something is happening with guns.

Why is this happening?

Oh my god.

And guys, I don't know what the answer is.

I really don't.

But I'll be honest with you.

And listen, and I here's my thing.

I don't even know if stricter gun laws will work.

But guess what?

I'm willing to try.

Okay?

Can we try it?

Can we just give it a shot?

Because

what is happening right now is not working.

Clearly, it's not working.

And I'm curious on how this gun got acquired.

So hopefully the investigation and they figure it out.

But what I'm saying is that, listen, guys, like I said, I'm not telling you, hey, stricter gun laws is the answer.

I'm saying I'm willing to just give it a shot.

Can we just try?

Right.

And see what happens.

Can we just try?

Right.

Because right now,

I don't care.

Listen, guess what?

Charlie Kirk got assassinated in Utah, and there were guns there.

People are allowed to carry in Utah.

Do you know what I'm saying?

So, I mean, he still died.

Yeah.

The other school, that shooting that just happened a couple weeks ago.

Yeah.

They were all out of carry.

Everyone's allowed to carry, but people are still dying.

So it's not the ant.

I don't think they're putting more security guards and putting more.

I'm just like, dude.

Something needs to change.

yeah like you said i'm willing to why not just try it as a country and see what happens and it's like if the which obviously the president and people like all over there there's a fucking problem okay and if you all can't see that there's a fucking problem then you're part of the problem what because

we should be able to go to an event okay

and speak about conflicting beliefs with one another and debate one another without the fear of being killed because somebody doesn't agree with my belief.

We should be able to kiss our kids goodbye in the morning and send them to school and not worry, constantly worry about them being killed in a space where they're supposed to be safe.

Okay.

I mean, there has been times with things going on in the country where I have kissed my kids goodbye in the morning and sent them on the bus and then I was riddled with anxiety because it's just you're sending them into the unknown because nothing is fucking changing.

And as an American, I'm fucking over it.

I'm done.

That's why I said, listen, guys, I'm not telling you what the answer is.

I don't even know what the answer is.

I'm not sure.

I'm not sure.

But I am willing to roll the fucking dice.

Yeah.

Because too many people are dying.

Please.

And also, you're a fucking gun.

And honestly, and I know the biggest argument is mental illness.

Okay, sure.

Like I said, I'm not telling you what the answer is.

Okay, fine.

Let's go down that rabbit hole.

The mental illness.

Okay, if that's what it is, then we need to not cut funding that supports the mental health of this country.

Which they already did.

So, but it's an important thing to like, hey, you want to say, hey, well, it's not the guns, it's the mental illness, and then support an administration that's actively cutting funding for mental health that supports mental health crisis situations.

Right.

This is something we need to.

And also, people need to realize too, though, that in some states, it doesn't matter, they don't do any testing, nothing.

If you're a certain age, you can legally just go in, buy a gun, and conceal carry without having a license to do so.

Okay?

Like in Utah.

It's insane.

Are they allowed to open carry?

Huh?

What is Utah?

It was concealed.

They said it yesterday that

in Utah, people, if you're 18 years or old, 18, you can buy a gun and you can conceal carry even on a school campus.

What?

Yes.

Are you serious?

Wow, yeah.

A lot of individuals 21 or older to openly are concealed.

Oh, 21?

Okay.

Yeah.

2010 openly concealed carry farm without a permit.

Yes.

Yeah.

So you know what I mean?

Like, please,

guys,

Florida, where my dad lives.

Dude, where my dad lives.

Same thing.

You can own a gun and you can conceal carry and not have a permit to do so.

You can just conceal carry that bitch anywhere.

Like, they don't do no background checks, no nothing.

You go in, you buy a gun.

You know what I mean?

And I guess the question, people go, oh, put more security, put more scanners, metal detector, whatever.

Is that the America you want to live in?

Do you want to live in having to walk through metal detectors everywhere you go?

Do you want to live with spending millions and billions of dollars on more security guards?

Do you want to to live?

Like, no,

I also don't want to send my kid to a school that looks like a fucking prison with security guards and shit everywhere.

We should be able to go places freely without having the fucking fear of being brutally shot to death.

Yeah, I mean, it's, it's pretty.

It happens, it happens everywhere.

It happens at concerts.

It happened just yesterday with Charlie Kirk just having debates with people.

It happens at school where little babies are getting fucking shot.

You know, like, I'm over it.

I'm, sometimes I get to the point where it's like, I'm going to fuck.

I need to, I'm going to move.

You know what I mean?

Like, I'm serious.

No, I mean,

like, sometimes I'm like, I need to get the fuck out of here.

And I also feel like for people who are not involved or want, not wanting to be involved, I understand your position.

I get it.

But it comes to a point in time when it's like, you can't.

You can't leave the fire to put it out.

You got to be in it and you have to be actively working and trying to

limit the spread.

But I feel like no matter how much we scream it, and I see people screaming it of like, we need change, we need change, we need change, while you have these fucking idiots just saying, like, thoughts and prayers, thoughts and prayers, thoughts and prayers don't fucking work.

Yeah, it's not working,

it never works, it's not working at all.

So, is that what you're saying to this daughter who just lost her dad in front of her eyes?

Oh, thoughts and prayers, honey.

Hopefully, you'll get better.

Or the moms and dads that literally lost their kids while they were at school.

Oh, thoughts and prayers, that's not fucking changing shit.

Like, it pisses me off.

I know.

Well, I think that's what I'm saying.

I'm over it.

Yeah,

it just brings up a whole different kind of conversation how

we need to move forward.

But I think this happens all the time.

Every other day, there's something, oh, we need to do it.

It's like, I'm just done.

I guess I'm done with the current things.

Like I said, either you make it so damn, you know, thorough, I don't care if it's two-year investigation for you to own one.

I don't care.

Whatever you got to do, if you got to reform the approval process to get the gun, sure, whatever.

Like I said, I'm not telling you what the answer is.

I'm just willing to try because it's not worth it.

So, let's just do this.

Let's just see what happens, guys.

Can you just see what happens?

And

people won't agree with.

I mean, I know some people.

Oh, they're going to hate us for this,

which is fine.

That's, I'm not going to say that.

That's just my beliefs and morals.

And I would rather, like I said, send my kids to school or have debates in a way.

And listen, this is the Kate and Ty podcast.

Listen, this is how.

So, I'm not, like I said, I invite all people to be here, share this space.

Right, but my belief is, but this is it.

I don't know what else to say.

My feeling is there should be no assault rifles available to the public whatsoever.

I don't agree with it.

It's not fucking necessary.

No.

Especially because, like, dude, you're not taking an AK and going hunting deer.

Like, it's weird.

No.

And we're not in fucking wars.

And I also feel like

it's a lot of people.

No, I agree.

But I also feel like for certain marksmen and people that want to do it certain ways, then there needs to be control facilities.

If we're going to lock up all of our people in prison, if we're going to lock up criminals in our prison systems and spend money on that shit, I'm pretty sure we can have a little wing department whatever where it's like you want to do it in sport you go there you rent a gun you rent one you do the rain whatever you got to do what i like i said and this is just me thinking on the top of my head right i don't know what the answer is but i'm willing to try like i said i'll keep saying it over and over again and i hope someone you know i hope something eventually happens or

we need to go out there everybody needs to go out there and we need to start calling our representatives we need to start voting and we need to put in the fucking footwork i guess in order there for there to be changed because nothing's happening.

Well, it's all we can do.

Honestly, that's what I'm saying.

Like, like, I uh

um like I said, I think it comes down to like when people they get so

they almost get so

like attached and married to their they almost like make their whole personality attached to a cause, right?

And I feel like there could be that that intense uh passion for that cause can cause blindness.

You it can cause blinders to go up and

you can get lost in it.

And so I feel like.

So I feel like it's important for everyone on both sides of the aisle for everyone to just really

try to jump to the other side and just view, zoom out and just be open-minded, think, and just, you know, like, don't be so

sad.

Yeah, don't be, don't be so reliant on this

ideology, I guess, or whatever you want to call it.

Like, don't be so married to it.

Like, be a, be, be, um, willing to adapt to change, be willing to listen to new ideas.

Unfortunately, there's just a lot of closed-minded people in this world, too.

You know what I mean?

Like, it just sucks.

It's shitty.

There needs to be change.

And

I feel horrible for everybody that was affected yesterday because not only was it his family, but it was everybody that was there and witnessed what happened too.

And it was unnecessary.

It didn't have to happen.

No.

It's sad.

I don't think anyone, like you said, going to a school, going to a concert, going to a public event, going to a speaking, whatever, no one should have to worry about dying there.

No.

It happens all the time.

No.

It is crazy.

Our obsession with this

right that, by the way, was written when the average time to load a gun was you look it up.

You know what I mean?

You know, take it, file it.

I mean, it was, so, yeah.

Yeah.

So, I don't know.

Well, that was kind of,

we don't usually get that heavy with stuff, honestly.

So sorry, guys, if you're listening, like, what the fuck?

We don't usually get that, but I just felt like it's so fresh and that question happened.

And yeah.

There just needs to be changed.

But honestly, I want to elaborate on the fact that hatred is creating

hatred.

And it's like

you're not able.

Your ability to withstand an opposing opinion or viewpoint is critical.

Critical to us continuing to evolve as a species, as human beings, right?

What is your ability to withstand someone else's viewpoint and hear it in, you know what I mean?

And whatever.

Healthy, you know, talk about it.

But, but that comes with all things, not just like

political stuff.

I'm talking about even this whole, the last episode with homeschooling.

I mean, the hatred is insane.

The back and forth with, well, that's not right.

And you're stupid and you're wrong.

And I am.

It's like, dude, this hatred, though, guys.

Something needs to change.

What is happening?

And why are we so obsessed with this?

Can't we just be kind to one another?

And say, oh, I don't really agree with that, but I, but if it works for you, it's great.

Or agree to disagree.

Because, you know, people actually thought that I was again, like, I was saying, like, people think that I was saying, I'm against.

Parents who homeschool.

I'm like, dude, I also never, I never said that.

Right.

I literally asked a genuine question of how do you eliminate bias or minimize it when you're when you're you know the teacher and the parent and what we said was was like would it work for our family no yeah that's okay

you know but i think i said that and it's like

whoa actually because people aren't fully fucking listening no that's why well it makes me think about like okay so i'm sitting here telling you you know uh telling you how what i feel and then asking a question and just by me telling you how i feel and asking a question you literally rise up as in i'm your enemy now and i will destroy you with this opinion of mine it's like whoa dude i literally i think it'd be different if i was like well uh parents who homeschool are stupid.

You know, or I was like, parents who homeschool are shitty ass parents or whatever.

Like, that, okay, I would say that that would, that would call for

I would expect some hate from that.

But the fact of people are so quick to jump to the oppositional viewpoint and then just spew it out and not with education behind it, not with grace.

You're doing it.

aggressively.

You're doing it to cause pain and hurt and cause discourse to argue online.

It's weird.

It's really weird.

It's disturbing.

A part of me is like, dude, it just goes back to we are in such a state of

a culture,

an empathy war.

It's like people, I mean, that's what I feel.

I feel like we're losing.

We are.

We're losing it.

What's going on?

I don't know, but some things, guys, I don't care what you believe, what comes up.

We all meet in the streets and fucking kumbaya.

We are all the same species.

We are the same.

Right.

What is going on?

Can't we love each other for our differences?

You know, I can love you and not agree with you.

It's cool.

It's great.

There was multiple times that I did a live about the homeschooling thing.

I even said, I was like, I love that you're standing firm for you.

You're standing in your beliefs and you're doing it in a respectful way.

Other people, not so much.

And listen, I'll be honest with you.

You can go in my comments and you can argue all you want.

I lose all respect when you purposely

say words to cause harm.

You lost respect.

I'm not even going to debate debate with you anymore.

I'm not gonna talk to you.

You know what I'm saying?

So it's like

as Johnny would call them, they crash out.

Sure, yeah, exactly.

That's what I'm doing.

Even if it starts out kind of boo-boo,

everyone gets it gets insane quickly.

I'm like, dude.

So I, by the way, like, I, if you can't

talk to me with grace, understanding, and, and, and, and facts and be respectful, you're respectful.

I never, I never respond to people and go,

right, you know what I mean?

I'm respectful about it.

And I make sure I am.

Because it's like, I'm not trying to have an ugly argument.

No, I'm, we're having a conversation that's open.

And

dude, it's cool.

So, I don't know.

It's just been a lot.

And

if all of you, if everybody that's listening, just can we just be kind to one another, please?

That'd be great.

Yeah, go do it.

Uplift today.

Go, go, go.

I don't even know.

Buy someone's coffee.

Can you just like, like I said, you see a parent struggling, pat them on the back, say, you're doing a really good job.

Right.

If you see somebody who looks pretty and say, oh my God, God, you look so beautiful today.

Or just make somebody smile, please.

Can we just spread love?

And

because I'm ready for this to stop.

And wow, yeah, I'm sorry, you guys.

This was an interesting thing.

I know.

I didn't mean to.

We didn't mean to get, but I don't know what's going on.

You know, it is what it is.

It's how we believe it.

But I also want, but I also, like, we're still new at this podcasting thing.

And I also want to put it out there that, like, you know, I am not looking to appease anybody.

No.

Okay.

I'm just speaking.

If Kate and Ty break it down, And if I'm totally, and I actually support you and want you to leave, if anything we say offends you, hurts you, you don't like, you don't agree, whatever, you please exit.

Yeah.

Exit.

Yeah.

I support you.

I encourage you.

If you can't agree to disagree or whatever, then you can buy.

Yeah, I encourage you to just exit and

we'll be fine.

I'll be fine.

You'll be fine.

Yeah.

But this is a space that I want to make sure that whoever's listening, like, this is a place of love, compassion, empathy, kindness, understanding,

curiosity.

Yeah, that's it.

And so, yeah.

So, you know, let's try to make some change happen in the world.

And

thank you guys for joining us and, you know, watching us get a little emotional about the whole situation, but it's a lot.

And

please make sure to

like and review our show.

That helps us.

Also, join our Patreon family.

The full video episodes drop a week after the audio drops.

And

so I update that stuff.

And we just love you guys.

Try to do something to make somebody smile today.

And

we love you guys.

We love the support.

And we'll be talking to you soon.

Next week on Cane Tie, Brigada.

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