Hot Takes, Cold Truths

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Good evening, gentle listeners, all watchers, and welcome to Distractible.

This episode.

Willie Wade acts antediluvian after being cut up, then asks for evocative opinions.

Meticable Mark misses games, discusses true automobiles, plays politics with trains, cat contagions, and unveils AI artists.

Bludgeoning Bob whips Waymo, switches Mario, noses moonshoes, and crappy ocular examinations.

From glass gifts to Nessie.

Yes!

It's time for

hot takes, cold truths.

Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.

Hey everyone, welcome back to another episode of Distractible, where I am here.

Keep it on camera one on me, on me.

And my co-hosts are here.

They've been here this whole time.

I was here.

I never left frame.

I was just turning on my beautiful light.

To be fair, I didn't know what you were doing, so I was covering for you.

Guess who's in Guam?

Me!

Editor, Zwai!

Welcome to the show, or one of us hosts of the Dude Compete for Points.

I'm joined as always by my co-host, Mark and Bob.

Hello.

Hello.

How's things?

Pretty good.

Pretty good.

You know how they are.

Yeah, but not everyone else does.

It's been a few days.

Okay, I know things.

Yeah, you've been holding on to a small talk for like three episodes no i got articles let's talk about but i wanted to talk about this thing again remember this doohickey yes

so someone on the subreddit posted a tick tock that someone else made by someone by the name of connor the weller and they made a device that's a this basically

and it's a a knob and three buttons right i asked for two but it's got three right so i ordered it i don't have it yet but i did order order it.

Now I will leave a, I will review it.

I will use it.

I will try it.

And I will bring back my actual honest opinion about it.

Because all I want is to replicate what the DaVinci Resolve speed editor does with the wheel.

That's all I want.

And so we'll see.

I just wanted to point that out.

I bought it.

It'll be shipped eventually.

And if it's crap, I'll say it.

If it is, I'll say it.

I'll say it.

Well, they better give you a good one then.

They better make it special just for Mark or he'll say it.

Yep, exactly.

Just for me.

Anyway, I have more, but I don't want to get all the points.

Oh, okay.

I can get points.

Oh, man, you're crushing it right now.

You have a million percent more points than Bob.

The reason I turned my light on is because I feel guilty about it, but possibly for the first time ever, this is.

Maybe I should turn that setting off on my camera.

That's a great setting, man.

What are you trying to show us?

You got to learn to do the political gestures.

Yeah.

Like, oh, yeah, like if flight attendants.

Or two fingers for like the, you know, the Disney people.

That would probably still do it.

I don't even know.

This, this is,

this, this, where the fuck is my hand going?

This is real stained glass.

Factual, factual stained glass.

It's very heavy.

I have it up on a very heavy-duty mount, and I have its own special light on it because someone made that for me a long time ago.

Like in 2017, I got it.

And it has moved across the country with me because I got it in North Carolina.

It moved to California.

It moved back to Ohio.

I have kept it safe.

I built its own travel case for it, like out of a sheet of wood with like special bracing.

And then I pack it in.

And it has survived.

And it is awesome.

And I've never had a good way to like have it on the wall behind me before because it's heavy as fuck, but it's real stained glass.

It is super cool.

I got sent one of those too.

I've got one upstairs.

It's a red with like a black W, like Minecraft style from the old days.

I think the same person made them.

No, no, no, Bob, you're special.

Don't let him get away from your achievement here, Bob.

I think my only achievement is it's only slightly broken.

There are a couple panels of the bigger panels that are a little bit cracked, but it's got character, you know?

That is really, really cool looking, though.

It is cool.

Stained glass is tough.

Amy's done a little bit of stained glass.

She's done a lot of arts and crafts that I've never tried in the world, so I don't actually know how tough it is.

But she says it's pretty tough.

You have to be very careful, obviously, with cutting and all the things.

It's an art like anything else, so it does take a lot of skill.

And I see like curves in there.

It's that's probably tough.

Yeah, I mean, it's my black part, it's like my whole logo, and it's yeah, it just really worked out.

It'sn't a great thing.

It looks like if you held your hand up like this, you could perfectly make the square like this, sure.

Yeah, I might go ahead and turn that setting off.

Yeah, you get a point for playing along with me.

Well, do I have news?

Florida woman caught trying to carry turtles for airport security in her bra.

The turtles were in her bra or she was in her bra?

The turtles were in her bra.

She was in her bra and also the turtles.

And there's a comment here that says, I like tittles.

That's the whole reason I wanted to bring that one up.

That's it.

We all like tittles.

Okay, so the real thing

in LA, there's, well, actually, probably at a lot of, I think actually Austin, there's more of of these.

Are there any Waymos in Cincinnati?

They're everywhere now, all over LA.

There's tons of them.

Like, if you go to, um, I think it is Culver City, where there's a lot of them, and over on, like, near Santa Monica.

Um, I have, I don't, I try never to leave the house, so I don't really go out this much.

Context, Waymos are self-driving autonomous taximobiles, right?

Right.

Yes, I forgot to mention that.

I don't see any in Ohio.

Yeah, there's a bunch of cameras on them, and they're completely driverless.

Like, no one's in the driver's seat, right?

I don't remember any votes to allow that.

And I'm so curious how that approval process works.

I'm assuming there was an approval process because you need a license to drive and corporations are people, as we all know.

Sure, sure.

What they did was they pulled all the Waymo drivers and nobody objected.

Mr.

Moe got a license and just bequeathed that to all the Ways.

I'm just, I'm so curious because I've seen the data and I don't doubt that someday it'll be very clear that like automated cars are safer and they work.

I wish we could have trains because those shits, you know, also.

But minority report it was cars.

It is fascinating that this is not just like a concept.

Apparently it's just here and a business, the Waymo, the company, is just doing it.

And you can have this.

And it's on the streets that everyone else is on, that we all share, and it's happening now.

So, I'm just like super curious about how and why.

And the article that drew my attention to it is also APD, I don't, I think that must be Austin Police Department, says court system cannot process citations for Waymo.

So, they're getting tickets or they're getting citations somehow, but the system just isn't built for it.

Because, like, a cop pulls it over.

I think it actually stops if it sees police lights,

but a cop gets out, and what do they do?

Like, what happens?

Who signs the other side of the ticket?

Who do they give it to?

The guy riding in it?

Like, certainly not.

I wouldn't think so.

Yeah, it's just like, I don't think that there's any system in place for it.

Why is Waymo breaking the law?

Shouldn't it be programmed to follow the law?

I mean, realistically, like, even if you follow every law to the letter, things will happen where it's like you...

something occurred and you were in the wrong and maybe there's a citation.

Like, I don't think Waymos are going 20 miles an hour of the speed limit or anything like that.

But just like everyone else, there's stuff that they do that they get tickets for.

I think that's an interesting.

I mean, the boring answer is these were all approved by, like, in California, it was approved by the CPUC, California Public Utilities Commission, basically, because I think that's the same licensing body that like allows taxi companies to get medallions or however it works.

But I'm dubious that anyone here has done any actual like safety research that means anything to me because this is one of those situations where I would guess the government agency that approved this stuff talked to Waymo and was like, How safe are they?

And Waymo was like, Oh, safe, big safe.

Yeah, look, six safe.

And the commission was like, Okay,

six, that's pretty good.

You can do it.

But they're like, I'm with you.

And that I think it's fascinating/slash terrifying that this is just a thing that exists now.

There just are driverless cars that are not on rails or in, they're in limited areas, but like the area in Los Angeles is like 120 square miles or something approximately.

Like it's a shit.

It's lots of spaces, lots of places.

And what's even more concerning beyond this is I know that

Tesla and whoever's in charge of that company.

Mr.

Slaw.

Mr.

Slaw?

Yeah, of course.

Sorry, Mr.

Slaw.

Wants to get Tesla's out on the roads doing this thing.

And as a guy who used to own a Tesla, I don't anymore for anybody wondering,

for

silly reasons.

That car was terrible.

Its autopilot was terrible.

It got worse the longer that I drove it.

And generally, the car got worse the longer that I drove it.

And I had access to the

full self-driving beta.

Like,

I did not use that stuff.

I would not trust it.

I don't trust it.

I didn't even, I barely started trusting the actual autopilot that just does the highway version of it.

That, and they have way less cameras.

And they tout that as a feature.

Like, oh, you got so few, much fewer cameras than the Waymos do.

And because Waymos have a big, like, LiDAR sensor that is constantly going.

Yeah, Waymos look ridiculous.

They have a whole array of shit strapped on top and on the sides and stuff.

Yeah, that's the question, though.

How do they handle terrible conditions?

Sorry, go ahead.

They don't.

They don't handle bad conditions?

Do they pull over?

Do they just like, we can't see the line.

We know it's there.

I don't know about the Waymos, but the Teslas don't for sure.

No, as soon as the weather goes bad, the whole car, the whole system shuts out.

It goes,

I can't see.

I can't see.

Take over.

Ah!

And then it lets go really violently.

Yeah, but no Waymo, what the hell would happen?

Well, they have a lot more stuff.

I would imagine they could handle rain and things a little bit better, but probably there's a limit.

Yeah, I mean, if it's perfectly clear and you can see all the lines well, but like if the road's not painted or there's construction or something is not ideal, it's like, do they know how the hell to handle stuff like that?

I know it's complicated for you, but

AI.

Okay.

You got it.

Yeah, you're right.

You just feed the camera feed into the driving AI.

The trick is, you can only feed it good driving.

We accidentally put some accidents into the training that we put in there.

They loved crashing for a little bit.

That was scary.

But now it's all good.

They got that out of there.

Great.

Yeah, I don't know.

I mean, I haven't heard of a huge uptick in.

I've heard of Waymos being an absolute fucking menace, but not in terms of like causing accidents or hurting people in a serious way.

I've heard of Waymos being a complete fucking menace in terms of just casually blocking areas and also being completely unable to navigate things like parking lots and getting just like stuck.

to where the thing is like, oh, I can't go forward.

Oh, can't go backward.

Guess I stay here now.

And And that's it.

Is it set up like a taxi?

Like, you get in the back?

It's like Uber, but there's no people.

And it's just a regular car with all their sensors and shit.

So yeah, it's like a regular car with the driver's seat and everything.

But the person's in the back.

And if something does go wrong, they can't even take control of it.

I heard this, actually.

This is from social media.

So probably false.

I heard they are.

Waymo is starting with a new kind of vehicle.

So mostly what they've had so far is like SUVs to where it's a pretty normal looking like SUV get in the back type of deal.

I heard that they're starting with a new kind of thing that looks like kind of a minivan, but the front seats actually swivel like they do in like camper vans, right?

So it's almost like the like the Westworld thing where you have the taxi that's just kind of a sitting room where you all sit and you can face each other and talk while the car probably gets you somewhere safely, hopefully.

They had those in Europe.

I think when we were in France, we took a taxi or Uber or something somewhere that had like the seats face.

It wasn't the front seats seats that faced each other, but the back seats were like two faced this way, the other two faced each other.

So it was like normal two front seats, and then the ones right behind it were like lined up back to back, but facing the back, which was kind of cool, but a little scary.

I want to say I'm not against self-driving cars.

As a principle, I'm not.

And I think that Waymos are probably like, if you look at the data, I think that they are the best of all the people that are trying to make autonomous cars in terms of accident rates and like, you know, errors and issues.

And if you compare it to human drivers, who can be really bad, that's usually the argument.

It's like the average human driver is way worse in terms of statistical crashes and incidents than the autonomous cars.

I think that there is an argument to be made for that.

And honestly, like, I wouldn't be opposed to never having to drive again if I had to.

But at the same time, there are still those bad drivers on the road alongside all these things happening.

So it's just.

There was a kid the other day, man.

He swerved, would have hit me.

I saw him at the last second and kind of had to swerve over a little bit and then hit my brake.

He zoomed in front of me, texted on his fucking phone.

And then, like, I had to slam my horn.

Like, dude, what the fuck?

Didn't acknowledge, didn't do anything.

He swerved across a whole nother lane, past where the exit ramp entrance was supposed to be, cut somebody else off, still just texting.

He made it.

I'll see what you're complaining about, Grandpa.

I like being alive and not mangled.

I don't understand it.

Maybe this is like old man shaking stick at kids, but like.

The fuck.

Yeah, you are old man shaking.

I mean, judge, sir you're great

yeah wait whose episode is this

i'm the host don't forget it i definitely didn't do you think it's actually safer in a car if your seat's facing the back so that way if there's like a head on you're like already against the headrest i think generally yes that is safer but it's scarier and also more prone to like motion sick issues i think is the big thing i do get motion sicks i wonder i've never ridden on that side of a car or anything but i wonder if it but like that's that's the optimal way i think to take an accident assuming you have full support all the way up to behind your head it's way better than getting flung forward on your body and stuff but interesting i mean i i'm also not a pot like i like driving i guess but like maybe they'd have like i don't know just the speedways or kind of things you can take a car to and race it around now where you can still go drive your car you can drive around the neighborhood but like for highways and shit i am not opposed to

AI taking over one day, whenever it's actually competent enough to do it.

You know what that's called?

Trains.

I think Mark was on something.

I feel like the point of a car is you can drive it to exactly the place you need to go because there's not a train that goes there.

But if you want a big mass transit solution where there's one big corridor that sort of goes in and out of big city areas and out, you know what that's called, where you don't have to drive it and it's really safe and it's all automated.

That's called trains.

And they have those in lots of places except the United States for some fucking reason.

I mean, the argument is that it's the United States is fucking huge and we do have trains, but also, holy shit.

Oh my God.

When you actually, when you, and sure, it's probably people could categorize this propaganda, but when you look at videos of how public transit is in Japan, I've been to Korea.

Public transit, fucking amazing.

You can go anywhere.

anywhere on public transit.

And yes, smaller countries, but that's still a city.

And our cities don't have that, except for New York.

And they complain about that shit all the time because they underfund it.

And it's just like, oh, it could be great.

Cincinnati was building a subway system and I think it got stopped.

And now there's like a dance club or something down there.

But they were like, ah, people don't want this.

And it's like, oh, they didn't stop it to build a club.

Let's be very clear.

Well, no, they built a club down there after they stopped it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And that's one of many, many stations.

There's tons all over Cincinnati.

They could start it back up again.

You know, they could.

They could.

They could start it back up again.

Sure could.

Think of how many jobs that would create.

That's the thing.

People are like, oh, it's going to cost no money.

I'm like, where do you think that money's going?

Got to buy lots of dirt.

It goes right into the dirt.

They've actually built the railroad out of money.

You just shove money into the earth and it shits out more dirt for you and it's gone forever.

It's the one thing that some people complain about.

It's like, it's not a handout.

It's putting money towards work that needs to be done that will then allow more work to happen and if more efficiently and it'll be great for everybody and it'll reduce traffic you hate traffic and it'll be awesome but my freedom you can still drive there's stuff in play here that you don't understand i don't understand nobody understands that's why we can't do it nobody knows mark it's too complicated name one place that has good public transportation you can't there are there are no examples that we could look at of successful public transportation it always fails always that's why they always keep keep tearing them down when they build them.

That's why any place you've looked that puts in a good one, they just get rid of it right after.

What's this show about?

That's my job to know, and you to find out now.

Are we done with the small talk?

Oh, I have more small talk.

This is about another thing that people are, well, people are not that angry about it.

So, we talked about, I think, previously, I got a Switch 2.

And when last I mentioned it, I hadn't been able to use it at all.

I used it.

I was excited to play the new Mario Kart game because I was like, cool, I like Mario Kart.

It is possibly my favorite Mario Kart game and possibly one of my favorite games Nintendo has put out in recent memory.

And that might be sacrilegious to Nintendo people because I'm there are games that Nintendo has put out that are really good that are just not my thing.

But the open world exploration in the new Mario Kart game is so fucking cool.

All the courses exist on one big map, and you can just go into the map and drive around and do whatever the fuck you want but there's a bunch of shit to collect there's a bunch of secret spots to find there are dozens of skins for all the characters and stuff to unlock which you unlock by driving around and getting food from like fast food joints or food trucks or truck stops along the highway there's so much cool shit to do it's not like groundbreaking by any means because It's not that different from like a platformer or whatever exploration game.

But it's really cool that it's like a racing game like that.

I know like other racing games have had similar features, but for Mario Kart to do it's very unique.

No, it's it's it was surprising because it's really not advertised because you it's the same as Mario Kart 8.

You go into the menu and it's like, do you want to play single player?

Do you want to play?

Okay, you want to play a grand prix?

You want to play time trial?

It has all that stuff.

But from the main screen, if you just hit like the start, whatever, plus button and you and you just go onto the map, you could just start exploring and finding shit.

And it's very fun.

I thought it was just going to be like, like ah it's like the same but just new maps as mario kart no it's way better than last mario kart it's like really good which i'm totally shocked by i just i was surprised andy and i had like put james to bed and then played it all night and had like a hell of a time and it was like one in the morning and we're like oh fuck we gotta go to bed oh god

awesome super fun i wish i had time for games One day you'll be your own boss and you can do what you want to do.

I hope so.

It's almost done though, right?

Yeah, actually.

I like how people on the subreddit, my subreddit, are just sometimes like, if it's almost done, like he says, like, what am I doing?

What do they think I'm doing?

Jerking off in Cancun.

It's Guam.

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all right well i do have an episode we've done similar things maybe even the same thing but i'll never tell and i will never know i've got a list of topics here and i want to hear hot takes or cold truths what is a cold truth is that just boring yeah oh cold truth is just boring truth so if you tell me some cold truth that's like something I didn't know or is fun, interesting in some way, but is truthful, then it's like, okay, there you go.

Otherwise, you got to take the hot take stance on the subject.

What if it's cold lies?

Is that acceptable?

That's not the, no, cold truths.

Hot takes.

Or cold truths.

But the hot take could be a lie because that's just an opinion.

But if we tell a really intense truth and it gets too hot, that doesn't count.

It wouldn't be an opinion if it's truth.

Hot take is kind of like your opinion on the matter.

But you said it has to be a cold truth, I think, is what he's getting at.

What if it's a hot truth?

Yeah, that's what I'm asking.

Yeah.

There could be hot truth, maybe.

I think it's just the name of the game is hot take cold truth because it's like hot and cold.

He thought of the name and then made up a game to fit the name, I think, is what we're experiencing here.

I'm totally down with the game.

You're damn right, you are.

Because you're playing no matter what.

All right.

Your truths can be any temperature, but they got to be truths.

Your takes are going to be hot takes.

I'm going to get so many hot truths in here.

You're not even going to know what happened.

We'll find out.

I guess we'll start with a coin flip.

Mark, your heads.

Bob, your tails.

We'll see who goes first.

Heads.

I'm just glad I got to be included this time.

Shut up.

I called it.

I did.

I call it.

I called it.

You did.

After I gave you heads, you called heads.

All right, Mark, you get to go first.

Hot take or cold truth about

the moon landing.

It's cold on the moon.

it's true

you know

that's a truth that it was cold

i i listen to the rules i play by the rules thank you for sharing that cold truth bob do you have a hot take or a cold truth on the moon landing uh interesting fact about the moon because the the surface of the moon has no atmosphere the dirt and particles and stuff that's all settled onto it doesn't mechanically rub or move or get like blown around by wind or anything.

So there is no or there's minimal erosion.

So the particulate on the moon is so destructive.

They actually had to design the spacesuits and everything specially to be as rip resistant as possible.

And even though they were, I mean, they're on the moon as much as they could be when they landed and they were doing walks and stuff, but the suits that they brought back from being out on the moon like the tread is worn off the shoes the suits are so totally fucked they like barely survived existing because the it's like sand if

i don't even know how to explain it but it's just like it's just like really bad sand you know like really scratchy uh but it just like tears everything up and it's a really particular it's also deep uh i don't know if you've ever seen the moon lander in person but those big sticks that they have that go down they had like really long, like, I want to say like four or five foot long rods that like went down into the surface of the moon as like anchors because it's all sort of loosely packed dust.

It's fascinating.

The surface of the moon and the part and the nature of the particulates, it's fascinating.

I hadn't heard about the spacesuits wearing down faster.

That's kind of cool.

It was a serious problem, and they had to really work on, I believe.

Nah, that's probably made up.

Kevlar maybe was developed or some sort of ripstop material was developed because they needed something that would survive how abrasive the dust on the moon is.

Pretty much everything like that stems from the space age kind of needing these materials otherwise.

Oh, that reminds me of our, oh God, what was that?

The ginger dead man.

All right, you both went cold.

Interesting.

Bob, you'll be first on this one.

Tell me about the DMV.

Department of Motor Vehicle.

Oh, I know about the DMV.

It's called different things in different places, right?

It's the BMV Bureau.

In Ohio, it's the BMV.

In California, it's the DMV.

The thing about the DMV is they don't actually have any systems at all.

They have fake computers.

They have fake cameras.

They have fake everything.

You could walk in there and they could just hand you your ID in two seconds and they don't give a shit.

The tests you take, nobody checks that.

The eye exams they make you take, it's just a bit.

Have you seen those machines?

It's a joke to make you look stupid.

It's a method of control that the government uses to make sure everyone remembers that they have to stand in line and pay the fee and get the little ticket that says your car is allowed to exist.

It's all bullshit.

They could mail it to you, but they want you to stand in line.

Let me throw in your favor here.

I worked with eyes for a long time and checked vision, used applination, all that stuff.

When you see how shitty the machines are at a place like the dmv or bmv that check your vision they seem like ancient archaic machines that are barely able to determine anything and if you fail that you definitely shouldn't have a license but like i feel like the standard for having a license should even be higher than what those machines give because it's like the bare minimum vision it's like can you see flashing lights in your eye yeah Great, give him a license.

He's good.

It's like, I just maybe a little bit higher.

Anyway, sorry, Bob.

I didn't mean to cut you off, but it's because it's bullshit, it's because it's nothing, it's because it's a conspiracy, man.

They don't check anything, they could just hand you your ID and let you walk out the door or just mail it directly to your house like a civilized society would do.

But no, it's meant to be torturous and controlling and to hold you down.

I have the spiciest take.

We should and should have set an age where you can no longer drive.

I'm not even saying there should be a test.

No test.

If you're over 60, you can't drive anymore.

And here's why.

Because if that were the case, and it's like written in, it's an amendment, right?

Just the no driving for oldies amendment.

The old people will vote for better public transit

year

after year after year because they'll be like, I can't drive

it, but I get it.

I understand why.

So we better have trains, goddamn it, and buses.

And so they'll vote over and over again.

The founding fathers should have realized that cars were going to be invented, put it into the Constitution so that it could have been a thing because obviously.

And then we would have trains because the old people vote way more than anybody else.

And it would have been passed by all the can they only care about that because they're like, I can't get to the store.

I can't get to my bingo match.

Whatever old people do.

I don't know, you know,

the competitive bingo match.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah.

Or Kino or whatever it is.

They would have voted.

So I say, Let's start now.

They won't even remember we did it.

We'll just tell them, all the old people, it was always this way.

And they'll be like, oh, I should have voted for that.

And then they will.

And then we'll have trains.

Anything for trains.

Anything to get trains.

I think we can all agree that if you know some people feel like they're being discriminated against, this is a slippery slope.

No, man, you're doing great.

It's spicy.

You're right.

I'm getting hotter by the word.

Am I right?

Oh, Subbren, how hot is it for Mark right now?

Look, I'm just saying age is a number, and that number is important.

What is the age?

I think you might have picked a little bit of a low age there, but this isn't my take.

No, no, no.

I want many years of voting.

I know that they can do it.

But if we go too high, then they're going to be like, well, some people will be like, I agree.

But if we go low enough, it's just like, hey, this is just what it is.

You only only get 40 years of driving.

Make the most of it.

That's not even retirement age, though.

Isn't retirement age going to be like 80 and 83 in the next election?

No, you got to get to work still at that point.

So you really need the bus.

Shouldn't we shrink it from both ends then?

That'll really get the youth vote out there.

Raise the driving age to like 25,

30.

Or just make it really unbearable to drive at that age.

Like you have a camera watching you to make sure you're not on your phone.

You have to have a person in the car with you until you're like 20.

It's make it really like uncomfortable.

I thought you meant like spikes in the seat, the gas lighting has

like

flame on it that burns your toes.

Spikes on your steering wheel that make sure your hands bleed.

And if enough blood doesn't get absorbed, they know you're driving with one hand.

And they measure your blood alcohol level at the same time.

Those are pretty spicy takes.

All right.

DMV is all fake, or we need to take away everyone's license.

Unless you're specifically like 35.

Our age, how conspicuous.

I feel like I said some other things.

Very all spicy, Mark.

Discriminate against as many as possible, Mark Applier.

You can quote him on that, about me.

You can quote me on him.

Hot takes or cold truths on the battle between what's better, cats or dogs.

All right, so this is gonna be a thing because I read an article.

Go on.

I read something, you know, about

how cats have a disease that infects people who have cats to make them want cats more.

And this is the most bullshit conjecture

I might be ass to mouth right for misinformation, but I'm going for it.

There is a disease that cats will poop out and you will breathe in and that will be in your brain forever that will make you want cats and also cause other issues, but mostly make you want cats.

I'm saying that might be where that cold crazy cat lady or crazy cat guy comes into play.

It's cats that have been trying to mind-control us this entire time, and I won't be fooled.

Chica wouldn't do that to me, I would do anything for her, but that's because I love her and I'm not mind-controlled.

I would just die and/or kill for her.

That reminds me of the Florida lady who tried to smuggle cats onto a plane inside of her bra.

Turtles.

No, titty cats.

Tittles.

Here, tittles.

Here, tittles.

I can't drive, but I can carry you.

Wait, cat disease brain thing.

Yep, that'll do it.

Toxoplasmosis.

And that makes you want more cats.

Yeah, yeah.

Makes sense if you think about it.

I don't know whether to mark that down as a hot take or a cold truth.

Could be both.

Man, that's a hot, cold take truth.

Whatever you write it down as is what you believe.

All right, Bob.

I have a real bombshell for you.

They

both suck.

All of them are bad

because of one reason and one reason alone.

They're all mortal.

If cats and dogs lived longer than people, this really wouldn't be a problem.

I would rather have dogs, but this is basically a problem with all of them.

They get old way faster than us.

They get diseases.

They get sick.

they need things, and then they leave you.

And it's hard to imagine a thing that is more painful and life-ruining and disruptive to my entire existence than when Lexi leaves.

And it's going to happen unless I die tragically

in the near future.

That's just how it goes.

It's a sad truth, and it sucks.

It makes me angry.

Let's get the family together holding the grenade.

We go out as one.

Oh, well, I don't know about that, man.

You said you'd do anything for Chica.

Taking those words back now, aren't we?

No, I said or.

I said I would.

Oh, no, I did say and/or.

Okay, you're right.

Yeah, okay.

You got a grenade?

I'll ship it to you.

That's my hot take.

No one is better than anyone because they all do the same bullshit.

Die.

Die.

Cats get to do it at least nine times, though, right?

That didn't feel as morbid inside my head as it did when I started to say it, but that was really.

I'm not proud of that.

That was a corpse cold take.

Boy, I feel like that was

hot.

Your temperature differential, I'm still not sure.

I need a new thermometer.

It was a joke because it's talking about them dying.

It was a hilarious joke that no one,

even me, laughed at.

Everyone felt how funny it was.

You need to laugh outside to know how funny something is.

You know, if you think about licking something funny, you'll be able to know how that joke tastes.

Oh, here we go.

This one's on brand for us to talk about.

And, Bob, you get to lead it off.

AI art.

Hot takes about AI art.

Or cold truths.

No, hot takes.

Okay.

My hot takes are just on point today.

Everyone really likes the hot takes I've been bringing to the table.

I can tell.

I think AI art is peak.

It is better than humanity could ever hope to be, and it's only at 20% of its final form.

Everyone makes jokes about how sloppy it is, and you're right.

There are tons of issues, and it's already surpassed anything we could hope to do.

Da Vinci, Van Gogh,

those other painters whose names I know but aren't worth mentioning.

Nobody's compared to the majesty that is AI art.

It's all I look at.

I don't even want to see reality anymore.

I just look at AI art.

Why would you need anything else?

Van Gogh is famous for doing art with only one ear.

AI does it with none ears.

The fewer body parts, the better the art.

That's always been true.

The fewer the part, the greater the art.

Can I get a for you saying that?

Okay, cool.

It was about my thing.

If anyone gets a point, I should.

I just thought I'd ask.

No one else was asking.

I thought it was up in the air.

I just went for it.

You know, I can't hurt a guy for asking.

I'll give it the Bob for not boldness.

Okay, it does hurt me for asking.

Okay, that's fine.

Whatever.

Hurt a fair amount for asking.

Go figure.

Yeah, I sure did.

Yeah.

Okay.

All right.

Anyway, cold truth.

Here's the thing about AI art that I want, I hope is encouraging for artists, but maybe not.

If you are trying AR art and you're making it, whatever you want to call it, you're making it or not, you'll get bored of it because you don't actually like making art.

And I'm talking to like the AI art bros out there.

The reason people make art in general of many different forms is because it's a journey.

And I can't believe that people don't realize people think, know about the whole, the phrase, like, it's not the destination, it's the journey.

They've heard it all their life and they never believed it.

But you would believe it if you are on that journey.

If you're a person that draws or you're a person that does art, you do art because it's your passion to do art, or you feel at least the spark of passion to do it.

There are people that get excited about being able to, quote, make art with AI, and that's an infatuation.

And they'll get bored of it and they'll stop because they won't find it to be purposeful in their life because they didn't find it purposeful before.

It's not going to make someone so much happier to make it just because you can prompt it and crank it out.

They do right now because it's exciting and new and it's getting better with each iteration, but the betterness is already slowing down.

And so the excitement's going to fall out and they'll realize it like, well, I guess there really isn't any value in my life for making this stuff.

And they'll fall out of it.

Just like everyone who has tried art and didn't pursue it the rest of their life, it's kind of a simple thing.

So I think like that's just something that we all have to understand.

Like it still has to be used by people.

And the people that don't actually like making art aren't going to use it.

So maybe there's exceptions, obviously, for everything, but it's not going to replace the number of artists because those artists will still enjoy making art, even if AI art is able to be made.

And the people that are proposing, like, ah, this is so much better than all those stupid artists out there.

They're not artists before.

They're not going to be artists after because they don't like making art.

And so that's the, that's the kind of cold reality for people.

It's still just a tool.

And, you know, some people are going to like making the tool.

And yeah, I'm not saying it's not going to get rid of jobs.

That's also the other problem because companies are still different than replacement.

That's the thing.

This is about art as a passion and art as an art form.

You know, making it is important to the human condition.

And there's plenty of people that do it for not money already.

So I don't think it's going to stop people from doing it because it's about the journey.

That could be a hot take or a cold truth.

I think it's a cold truth.

I missed my mouth.

Your nut exclamation point didn't land.

I bet Wade's writing a point for me missing the peanut in my mouth and not for what I said.

100%.

That is true right now.

You got a nut missed point.

All the words I said, anything for that?

There might be.

There might be.

There might be.

Not now.

Maybe I already wrote that one down.

Did you?

I did.

You got a need to love art point.

Okay.

You happy now?

Am I happy now?

You can write that down after.

This should give a Bob a point for just being content not questioning my points.

He was actually shaking his head that you didn't write it down the whole time.

Well, fuck you both.

All right.

Mark, here's your prompt.

Toilet paper.

Over?

Under.

Well, clearly over.

If it's the other way, it rubs against the wall.

I don't want that.

The only way it gets away from the wall is if it's over.

It's not even like a preference of which one's easier to pull.

I mean, some people have rolls that are, you know, offset or freestanding.

Most of the time, it's up against a wall because that's a convenient way to mount it.

If it's under, it's going to be on the wall.

And I know that it's not that dirty, but it's next to a toilet.

I'd rather it just be floating in the air because I don't want to rub the wall, my ass on the wall.

I don't want to rub the wall on my ass.

Over.

No micro paint sticks.

No micro what?

It's like plastics, but paint, little paint sticks.

What are we painting?

What is he talking about?

Bob, what's he talking about?

Nums.

If the toilet paper rubbed the wall, little micro bits of paint would be on the toilet paper that you'd be putting in your ass.

Micro paint flex, all right, anyway.

Bob, cold truth about toilet paper, and this is going to be a cold truth about a lot more things than just toilet paper, just like the debate about whether or not a hot dog is a sandwich, just like the debate about whether or not pineapple belongs on pizza, just like all of these things that everyone brings up and gets all heated about and has all these hot takes on, just couldn't fucking matter less.

The reason that it's a debate is because the toilet paper thing is so inconsequential that if you sit down, even in your own home somehow, and you notice, like, oh, the toilet paper's on the wrong way for how I would like it to be, do you change it?

No, you don't.

You just use it.

And you think to yourself, oh, who put this toilet paper on wrong?

And then you just use it.

And then you just leave.

It's so inconsequential that you don't even fix the thing that you claim to be so angry about and have such strong opinions opinions about.

Does a hot dog taste different if it's a sandwich?

No, no, it doesn't.

It tastes like a hot dog.

Doesn't really matter at all.

Why were you raising your hand, Mark?

I was going to say I changed the direction of toilet paper if I can.

I also change the direction when it's wrong.

I don't believe you.

I don't believe you.

I think I've done it in your own house, actually.

I believe I've done it in your bathroom.

In my house?

We don't have any sociopaths here, so it's always put on over, but

Maybe not, but I've definitely done it more than many times.

I think Molly doesn't care, and she puts it on one way or another.

And I'm like, how do you...

How could you?

It's like you don't even know who you're living with sometimes.

Yeah.

But I always flip it the correct way whenever I see it the wrong way.

Anywhere, anytime.

New topic, Wade.

Hot take, cold truth.

Your wife.

Lover to death.

Perfect human being.

Damn cold truth there.

Except when it comes to the toilet paper.

Okay.

A monster with the TP sheets.

All right, despite you OCD douchebags who are undercutting my point just in an effort to win the game instead of being real about shit right now, doesn't matter.

Wait, I'm the host.

I'm not trying to win anything.

Doesn't matter.

Does to me.

Does to me.

Bob, you get to keep the floor.

Hot takes cold truths.

The lochness monster.

I just like the lochness monster, but I don't know if I have any good cold truths about Nessie.

Hot take.

Nessie's actually just a very saw, a very small

ankylosaurus.

No, not that one.

Bronchiosaurus?

Brontosaurus?

Brontosaurus.

A dinosaur that happened to just survive for millions of years for no apparent reason that no one noticed.

And it's not a monster, just a dinosaur.

And everyone should love and respect Nessie because she's the best.

I don't know if that's a hot take or a whole truth.

Probably the truth.

I hot take Loch Ness monster, Bigfoot, Sasquatch, Yeti, all the mythical creatures that you know and love, we probably killed them a long time ago.

Let's be perfectly honest.

There's a reason why there's no human offshoots still alive to this day.

It's because we killed them.

There's a reason why

you don't find any mythical beasts.

All the dragons that might or may have existed in the past were killed for sport because that's what we do.

And if there was, and if there was a Sasquatch in the woods that was confirmed and was causing a problem for a town, the local police force would have marched marched arm in arm in a line with their guns straight out, shooting everything in sight.

Little Timmy lost in the woods, bang, bang, bang, bang.

Oh, look, a deer, bang, bang, bang.

Bunny, bang, bang.

Everyone all mowed down, trying to get to Sasquatch.

And then the Sasquatch is dead.

And with Sasquatch is dying, we're, I know this is about Loch Ness, so let's go back a bit.

They march into the lake, arm in arm.

Bang, bang, bang, and they're banging away.

What language is that?

With their Scottish guns.

Their Scottish guns.

They got to blow into it, you know, inflate the gun.

And they're shooting, shooting underwater until it's dead.

Finding Nemo.

Find all these holes in Nemo from the bullets.

Again, Loch Ness Monster.

Not finding Nemo.

It all connects.

It all connects.

Yeah.

I've got more, but I think Locky.

Locky.

I think Nessie was a good place.

Oh, Locky.

They call it Locky over in Europe, but it's Nessie here where it matters.

Europe.

Yeah.

They home old Lockhey over there.

They drive on the wrong side of the road.

Call him Locky.

It's a mess.

Yep.

In all of Europe, they drive on the wrong side of the road.

That's a fact.

Yes.

I'm the host, and I declare it so.

I didn't know those powers to alter reality.

I like it.

Everyone in Europe just hit with the old muick.

Oh, God.

Bas pasietia.

Oh, le chit.

Also, le chit, but Italian.

Ooh, I didn't know you were fluent.

That was fun.

I don't know if you guys had fun.

I enjoyed it.

You guys had more truths.

I did not expect there to be many truths.

I'm not a good hot taker.

I'm a good fibber.

I tell a good fib, but I don't have a lot of hot takes.

I think I alienated a lot of my fan base today.

I'm sticking to my one about cats and dogs, though.

That was a winner.

I feel perfectly fine with my position on things.

You guys are in trouble.

Well, I have no concerns about being in trouble.

I just.

All right.

Mark, you got points for.

New knob.

Florida brawl tittle.

Waymo.

Trains.

Your Tesla sucked.

Cold on the moon.

Public transit callback.

Too old to drive.

Cat people have disease.

Not.

Oh, nut missed.

Need to love art.

TP over.

Willing to fix TP.

Scottish guns.

And we killed them.

I got a bad feeling about how many points I'm about to get.

I just want to note: Need to Love Art was after the peanut miss in the mouth, and in that moment.

No, no, no, I had it or before.

You read it after.

Oh, well, it's written before the arrow.

Just conveniently, you read it after.

I see, yes.

Need to love arts like here.

What the even fuck do you do?

I still don't understand the system.

Trust me, it's fine.

Bob, you got points for stained glass, cam zoom, playing along, switch to works, AI greater than Wade,

no Atmo rip suits, new Mario Kart best.

That probably was before, but the arrow, whatever.

DMV is a phony.

And Guam.

Cats, nor dogs.

AI art great only at 20%.

Stupid mortal pets.

Fewer part, better art.

You got quote.

You You got points for that.

Oh, yeah.

Well, that's just true.

Likes Nessie.

Toilet paper debate for dummies.

But you did lose a point for not willing to change the toilet paper direction.

It's not that I'm not willing.

It's just that it doesn't fucking matter.

Right now, Mark, you are at 5, 10, 15, 16.

Bob, you're at 5, 10, 15, 14.

Because the loss.

16 to 14 right now.

I'm fucking out of my gourd.

It's not over yet.

We've seen these comebacks happen, but this does seem to be your season.

I already have the best Scottish accent.

It's in the bag.

That's true.

If that comes up, I'm not even putting up a fight.

Yeah,

you're doomed.

Shall I spin the how many wheel, sir?

Let's do it.

We are now in the era of ones.

Oh, never mind.

Oh, three's good for Bob.

Yeah, well, that was kind of my only chance.

Or it could be good for me.

Extend my reach, you know.

What are we adding to the wheel?

Oh, Lord of wheels.

Love of video games.

What does that mean?

You gave some love to Mario Kart today, and it's just, it's nice to hear positive video game stuff.

I'm a gamer.

What the hell do you mean by that?

I mean, you contributed nothing to video game discussion today, and Bob did, and that made me happy.

Usually, I'm the video game guy.

I'm over here like, oh, Blue Prince.

Oh, check this game out.

I was playing this.

I think some video game love, considering our career roots are video games, is just a little appreciated.

All right, three spins.

It is.

Come on, only give points to me.

How many am I behind by?

Two right now?

Two.

What?

Did either of you drool?

I mean, I was eating, but I don't know if I was drooling.

Wait, what is my camera doing here?

Wait a sec.

Wait a sec.

Wait.

Whoa.

Whoa, whoa.

Whoa, whoa.

That's new.

All right.

No, I think it might be a respin unless you've drooled.

I don't think I drooled at all, no.

Yeah, I can't say that I drooled.

Yeah, I didn't drool.

All right.

I'm going to

tell my camera to stop being a fucking weirdo.

Oh, most callbacks.

You even said I had a callback.

I did.

Yeah.

Wait, I called back to a whole other episode.

I said I did the button Italian callback.

That was a callback.

Mark did the public transit callback, and I think those are the only two I have.

If I had to guess, his is older.

So therefore, I didn't even think that what I was doing was a callback.

Well, this is most callbacks.

This isn't quality, it's most.

And I've got one for each of you at the moment.

I wasn't making a callback when I did it.

You just wrote it down.

Okay.

Well, Bob, you get the point.

I'll take it.

All right, now let's just land on most callbacks two more times, and that'll be a day.

Okay.

No,

no point.

Fuck you, is what we landed on.

All right.

Oh, man.

I win either way.

It's going to be a tie or it's going to be me.

That's true.

I'm gonna argue this so hard for you, Bob.

Come on, tie.

Point for oh, no!

Point for viewers.

I mean, yay, but man,

I was sweating a little bit.

All right, I'll take it.

I'll take it, but we haven't had the wheel of torture spun in such a long time.

It has been way too long.

It's been a long time, man.

It's by no fault of our own.

Our scores have mostly been tight.

That one could have gone either way.

I mean, well congratulations mark you are the winner thank you thank you very much what do you have to say winner speech it just goes to show it's about the journey not to destination i thought i was losing the whole time but i never gave up i gave up a little bit towards the end there but then it was right out that i had more points and then i stopped giving up and i started fighting again and even though even though i don't know how in the hell i won I still won, and I believe it's because I'm just that handsome.

Too late to change the winner.

Bob, um, loser speech.

I feel worse about you having to give one now.

This loser speech is sponsored by my inability to craft a hot take of any sort.

This was biased against me the whole time.

I'm a cold man.

I am not a hot taker, and I never stood a chance.

Nobody has hot takes like Mark.

Oh, one coin flip would not have saved me.

I would need like four coin flips to try and turn this bad boy around.

But you know what?

You have to take it on the chin sometimes when obvious bias against you crops up you just have to look the other way and uh forget that there's a coin flip thing you could have done and that's what i did today well said uh viewers get to the subreddit or you know make comments because you guys actually lost even worse so you're the ultimate losers and i'm expecting a loser speech from you guys today you got a point which i guess is more than we can say for the listeners but like that means they didn't compete and you did and you still lost so you can follow market marketplier bob at Meisker, me at Minion77 or Lord Minion777.

Don't follow the viewers anywhere.

Take that.

Stay tuned for the next one, where I guess we'll see if Mark has any ideas left because he's hosted a free episode this season.

I think mine is two.

Always got it.

The most perfect crime is on the way.

We'll see.

Merch coming soon now.

Then, maybe.

Better look.

Maybe it's out there.

You find it.

Maybe next time we get together, we'll have an update for you.

Maybe it's right behind you.

Podcast out.