Taco Bell IX with Beck Bennett

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Check it out on our YouTube channel by going to youtube.com/slash doughboys media.

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In 1948, World War II veteran Glenn Bell opened Bell's Drive-In in the Inland Empire city of San Bernardino, California.

But it wasn't the Bell restaurant that would make him his fortune or allow his name to persist after his death.

Bell was known to frequent San Bernardino Taqueria Mitla Cafe, which also counted labor leader Cesar Chavez among its regulars.

And eventually he learned its recipes from the Mexican-American kitchen staff.

Though it's disputed how transparent Bell was about his eventual plans.

In 1952, after test-driving tacos at his own hot doggery, Bell officially shifted from long meat in a bun to ground meat in a tortilla and spent the next decade attempting taco-focused concept called tacotilla and El Taco to some success.

Then in 1962, he opened his eponymous Mexican fast food restaurant in the greater LA suburb of Downey, California, implementing the recipes he acquired and or pilfered from Mitla Cafe.

It was this version that became a global brand, and perhaps it explains why the company has, more than any other fast food chain, focused on recipes themselves.

At its corporate headquarters in Irvine, California, just a county away from the first Downey location, stands its innovation kitchen, which has cooked up wholly new and wholly inauthentic items over the decades that conceptually pushed the very boundaries of food itself.

The Mexican pizza, the crunch wrap supreme, Doritos Locos tacos, the cheesy gordita crunch, and the sadly discontinued Bell Beefer, taco meat on a hamburger bun, a sloppy Jose, if you will.

In 2017, the company began its first major forays into the territory of its Yum Brand stablemate, KFC, Crispy Chicken.

But its naked chicken chalupa, which used a folded chicken patty as a shell, confused consumers, and its naked chicken chips, an attempt at a tortilla chip form factor flat nugget, fell flat.

Iteration continued, however, and here, the brand found success not in adding hats on hats, but in simplification.

Its 2023 Krispy Chicken Nuggets were a test kitchen hit, and this year they followed up with Krispy Strips available on their own or as the protein within tacos and burritos.

Who knows what the future holds for the innovation kitchen?

Probably some real weird shit that tastes good as hell.

But the company's past is owed in large part to a different kitchen, the Mitla Cafes.

This week on Doughboys, we return once again to Taco Bell for the new Krispy Chicken menu.

Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants.

I'm Tiger Weiger, along with my co-host,

Tum Cruise,

the spoon man, Mike Mitchell.

Tum.

Tum like Tums, or Tummy Tum Tum, or just Tom, but pronounced the way Mitch says mom as mom.

That's cute.

I considered tum choose, but at that point, it's so removed from the real thing, I wasn't sure it made sense anymore.

Thank you for the best podcast at grip grand, roasted birdfock.com.

How about that?

Thanks, Grip Grand.

I wonder how we got that.

It sounds kind of like a little horny.

It sounds a little horny.

What did you?

I just want to start this episode off with a prayer.

Okay, great.

It is a Christian podcast.

Dear God,

please let this episode go viral.

Me and my guests are praying that this episode will go viral.

Not just viral, but the most viral any podcast has ever gone.

And no monkey paw twists, no new virus.

We want it to go viral.

Thank you.

Amen.

Amen.

That was beautiful.

Wow.

We just shook hands with our guests.

My guest and I have discussed.

My guest and I.

We've discussed

We've discussed virality.

Yeah, sure.

We just want today's episode to go viral.

Well, that's what we all want.

We're making internet content.

That's ultimately the goal.

And we're always chasing, everyone is always chasing the virality.

You're always chasing views.

You're always chasing hits, page views, you know?

Yes.

Yeah.

And

you could be coy about it, or you could do what you're doing and just be honest about like, that's what this is.

Yeah.

And you could pray to Almighty God.

But you don't want the monkey paw.

You don't want a little twist.

that was a smart move you did there, and I caught it.

And I think, I don't know if our listeners caught it, but like, I thought it was really savvy because you're a man who's prayed before, you know, that sometimes God wants to fulfill your wish, ironically.

Yes, and so he is, he is.

I mean, God is like any genie.

Yes, you have to, you have to be like, I, you got to be clear on all of your wishes.

He's really, he's like basically like the top genie.

He's like the most powerful genie.

God is a top genie.

God is a top genie.

God, you're the top genie.

And also, Genie, you're free.

Yeah, and Genie, you are free.

Who could forget when Robin Williams passed away and Genie was free?

Beautiful.

Mitch, I hope this episode does go viral.

I hope your prayer works.

I have a feeling that you're not going to be able to

fall down and my tiny dick to be out, and then it gets millions of views.

You know what I mean?

I really hope that doesn't happen.

You're saying that tiny dick guys want their dick to be shown up.

Well, that's our buddy JF's

theory.

Yeah.

So we guys with small small hogs and guys with huge hogs are the ones who are showing up.

We both like to show it off.

Which I get.

But I was going to say,

I thought when you're talking about virality, I thought you meant ironically that it would be like, oh, it will go viral.

You'll all get a virus.

Like, you'll all get some sort of disease.

No, no, not that virality.

Yeah.

No.

No.

I was a man.

I'm dealing with long COVID.

I don't like, the only viral I like is online.

Yeah, me too.

This virtual insanity we're all living in now.

Jimera Choir sang

correctly.

We're soothsayers.

Yes.

Prophets.

You know, you know, Dutton loved Jameir Choir and had a Jameir Choir poster in his house in LA.

Totally buy that.

He loved Jameir Choir.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Jameer Kwai.

Jameiraqui?

You ever go to that place?

The floors were crazy.

Couldn't stand still.

Is this the 1997 MTV Music Video Awards?

Hey, can I get a burger?

Whoa, whoa,

Grove.

Oh, sounds funny.

I mean, it is funny.

I think we got embarrassed by just doing jokes just in general.

Yeah, sure.

We got to introduce our guests.

We got to introduce ourselves.

But also,

I had a bathroom breakdown before the episode even started.

I don't think it caused

a bathroom breakdown because it was pre-show.

We hadn't waited.

I didn't tell you all about it then.

No, go for it.

Go for it.

I listened to Future Island's

seasons,

which is a great Letterman performance.

We've said it on here before.

And then the other song I listened listened to was

the song that we were listening to beforehand.

Oh, okay.

10% luck, 50% skill.

And then we did a Doughboys version

that Amelia kind of knocked out of the park.

Because I said like 10% shit.

And then

10% shit, 5% piss.

5%.

Come.

8% piss.

9% yum.

Yum.

Or crumbs.

Crumbs.

So you have three body fluids, and then we get to food.

Yeah.

I mean, this is what the odd guest is.

Yeah.

Yeah.

In the right ratio there.

Yeah, 15%.

Come.

What are the actual numbers?

50%.

50%.

Come.

Another 50% calm.

I've heard that.

So, like, I'm so

150% calm.

I'm so out of touch with modern, with contemporary music.

And I assume that song came out in the past five, 10 years.

I don't know what it is, but I've heard it in some.

It came out 15 years ago.

We were guessing beforehand.

Okay.

Oh, you weren't in the room.

I said, guess how many views this has?

Everyone, like, Amelia, I'm a guess, like, 1.6 million or something.

And

our guest guessed 3 million.

And then Casey guessed 30 million.

It's 380 million views.

Yeah, those songs get like looped endlessly.

People are always watching those and listening to that.

So like that song, I was trying to think of what context I must have heard that song.

Because it would have the only places I hear new music are like at the gym.

My guess is if you play like NBA 2K.

That's what I want.

Yeah, so yeah, it was probably in a video game.

That's probably where I encountered it.

Honestly, it's also a good workout song.

Like, it'd be a good running song because it's very intense and like heavy driving.

So maybe you hear it at the gym.

You definitely, I mean, I feel like it was like played for like NBA

on NBA ads or something.

Like it was like a song that was everywhere.

It's the Lincoln Park guy, we also found out.

There's also, remember the name is also an Ed Sheeran.

Oh, fuck.

Ed Sheerin.

Sheeran.

Sheeran.

Sheeran.

You said it wrong before the episode.

Everyone corrected you, and then you got it wrong again.

It's fine.

Ed Sheeran.

Ed Sheeran.

Ed Sheeran.

Ed Sheeran song.

Ed Sheeran, you nailed it.

That also remembered the name, featuring Eminem in 50 Cent.

How many views does that one have?

That's a great question.

You know what?

I was going to try to look up is how many views Virtual Insanity has.

Because I bet you.

I would not be shocked if Virtual Insanity crested a billion views.

I feel like people just listen to that.

It's such a popular song.

Oh my God.

Okay.

The Jamera Choir official

Vimo.

Veemo?

Vivo.

Vivo.

Vivo.

Vivo.

By the way, I think Vivo was owned by some huge label.

I'm trying to remember what it is, but it's one of those things where just like all these bands have, all these artists have Vivo affixed to their name for their video channels.

You guys a billion views?

Yeah.

Anyone else want to get

our guest is very politely not saying anything?

I looked it up, I looked it up, so I can't answer.

Wags.

Yeah.

Maybe, maybe I get this guy with my voice.

Maybe look 1.3 billion.

1.3 billion.

Pretty good guess.

Guess what?

Whoever that guy is who's guessing it,

way off,

way off, less than remember the name views.

319 million.

That's still a lot of views.

That's still a lot of views.

It's a lot of views.

If this episode does 319 million

with the viral.

Look, we have a lot of...

Me and my guests

have a lot of, uh,

we have a lot, and I've known him for a long time.

I've never heard him.

This is new to me.

This is a new voice.

Right.

I've never done it.

Emma, let's hit him with a drop.

I just want to mention this real quick.

Just real quick.

Just real quick.

As much as people would think, I don't have a lot of wrist strength.

Singies.

Stingies.

Bingies.

Bingies.

That's just like a man.

Yeah.

And I'm just like a little boy.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

That sucks.

Bingies.

Bingies.

Bingies.

Interesting.

That was a good beat.

I thought that was a good beat.

I thought it was good.

Yes.

Here is that file.

My IG name is at cakewalk backwards.

Cakewalk backwards.

But my real name is Shrimp Claw.

Wow.

I won't say what his actual name is.

But thank you, Shrimpclaw.

That was a great.

Sometimes these have like the drop has like a grand theory behind it.

It's like going to isolate one thing and sort of be like, well, we'll just, we'll just, you know, take that to its logical conclusion.

This one, I feel like, was more kind of just like scattershot, but it did have the thingies as kind of a landing bed.

It was an interesting approach.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

I enjoyed, I enjoyed it.

I liked it.

I liked it.

Is this our, we should introduce our guests?

Is this our 501st episode?

Is that in the order or no?

I don't know if this will be exactly sequential in terms of release.

I think we're recording this one a little in advance.

Yeah.

Yeah.

This will be out July 3rd.

Yes.

So it might be 502, 503.

Sorry, to our guest.

That's okay.

I'm just happy to be here.

We need to apologize to our guests for that.

It's fine.

Yeah.

No, yeah.

No, it's okay.

Don't be weird.

I hope that our guest speaks like this in that voice the rest of the episode.

Yeah, maybe I get stuck here.

You know, speaking of our guests, Mitch, and speaking of potentially going viral, I have a little surprise of my own.

Wait, what?

I figured because of what our guest is involved in,

I might go into Clark Kent mode for this episode.

Put on some specs.

Oh, my God.

Wow.

Regular four eyes.

That's amazing.

Returning to the pod from SNL, Good Neighbor in the new film Superman in Theaters July 11th.

Beck Bennett is here.

Hi, Beck.

Oh, hi.

It's so good to be, like, just go back, drop into my normal voice and just be myself here with you guys.

It was really hard not to be a part of it.

I didn't even recognize you as a human being.

I'm happy you're back.

Thank you so much.

I mean, you know, I'm an actor.

I act and do voices and stuff.

So you're major.

It's just acting major.

It just came naturally to me to kind of disguise myself that way, kind of like you are now.

That's right.

Yeah, I can barely tell that you look exactly like Clark Kenned.

You gave, I mean, immediately I thought,

it's like falling down to like on vacation.

It's like, just like

the direct a video falling down sequel.

Yeah, it's a little chill.

The recast of the bus.

I'm going to the boss.

Yeah.

There is a seriousness to it, but kind of having fun.

He's having fun.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I like the glasses look sharp wise.

I like that.

These are my blue light glasses that I use before bed.

So, you know, we'll see if they make me a little sleepy.

I think I'll be all right.

Does it help you?

Go to sleep.

Size.

It helps a lot.

I guess I do have

blue light glasses.

I just had to get glasses.

I've turned 40 and could not see anymore.

Right.

It happened.

Yeah.

And then at night, I've been wearing my glasses.

Yeah,

this is like I became a big, because I had insomnia for many, many years.

I'm still dealing with it.

But I've gotten big into into life.

You had insomnia, before insomnia cookies even were out here.

That's true, bitch.

My insomnia diagnosis does predate the existence of the chain insomnia cookies.

Oh, I thought insomnia was because of the cookies.

Like, I thought people got insomnia.

I first thought it was the cookies.

No, actually, you thought it was cookie.

When you saw insomnia cookies, you thought that was like a, like it was like a medical term?

I thought it was, no, I just kind of thought it was like, oh, stay up all night.

And then it's like, stay up all night cookies or something.

And then people were eating them and they were going crazy.

And then people started getting getting insomnia.

I think there might be a direct connection.

I thought the cookies came first.

Yeah,

it could be

ultimately causal there.

But no, I do think insomnia, the disease came first.

Okay.

That's fair.

Oh, the disease came first.

I think so, yeah.

I think so.

Yeah.

Yeah, I would guess insomnia came before insomnia cookies.

That would be my guess.

I mean, yeah, but I'm not a doctor, but that was, I just had a theory there.

Yeah, none of us are doctors.

If he's an actor, though, he could be a doctor.

Exactly.

Have you ever played a doctor?

No, no, I don't get cast that way.

Oh, you'd be a great doctor.

Thank you.

You know, I think that would be going against type.

Really?

For me?

Yeah, I don't usually play smart people.

Aw.

No, it's okay.

I am really, really smart as a person.

You have to be really, really smart to play dumb people, too.

So they always say,

my man.

I sent you an audition I got for a doctor just the other day.

It was for him.

For a little

movie.

Wait, that was a doctor role?

It was a doctor role.

Wow, I don't know.

And it was like the first line is like,

I mean, I can't.

I I am Dr.

Dumbass.

Went to dip shit university.

I mean, like, the first thing was like, you have a lateral sprain of the whatever.

And I was just like, this is, no one is going to believe me saying those words.

Especially when you say it like that.

Yeah, lateral sprain of the whatever.

I believe you.

I believe you in anything, anything you do.

But then I did just audition for a Feral Man yesterday, which was much better.

I fit like a guy who was like, duh.

Like I was, I was like,

give me chocolate.

And I was like eating chocolate.

Great birthday boy sketch, Pharaoh Man.

Hell yeah, my man.

You were the titular Pharaoh Man.

I was the Pharaoh Man.

Yeah.

What was his name?

Mark Delvecchio or something?

It was a very, it was a, it was, it was a very funny name.

A perfect funny name.

Becca is back.

Beck is back.

Beck is back.

Speaking of the birthday boys.

It's so good to be back.

No, you could, you keep going.

I was just saying, it's great to be back.

It's been too long.

It's been too long.

Speaking of the birthday boys, right off the bat, you made me do this in New Orleans.

We were just in New Orleans together.

List your favorite birthday boys, top to bottom.

Go.

Fuck.

Oh,

the members.

Yeah, yeah, the members of the birthday boys.

You?

Yeah.

I'm a number one.

You're number one.

All right.

We don't have to do the rest of the list.

Okay, great.

Thank God.

What about your favorite good neighbor?

You, of course.

Thank you.

Okay, we don't have to go to anybody else.

Yeah.

And, you know,

I'd definitely say you for a good neighbor.

Yes.

Okay, interesting.

Birthday boys.

Kyle comes back on the show.

Yeah, yeah.

It can be Kyle when he comes.

It's okay.

I get it.

Birthday boys, maybe Ferguson.

Ferguson.

Of course, you pick the workhorse.

Yeah, yeah.

Fucking boring-ass answer.

A great answer.

Fergus is a great actor.

You'd be my Mary.

You'd be my fuck.

Kill Kowalek, right?

We'll let him do that on his own.

We love you, Koala.

Trap.

We love you.

Piece of cheese tricked me.

No.

The cheese tricked you.

Okay.

Beck is back.

Beck is back.

Beck is back, baby.

And you're back, not just on the podcast, but also back from the bayou.

You were down there with the spoon man.

I was.

We were ripping it up down in NOLA.

We had a blast down in NOLA.

And I want to ask you.

Yeah.

Name some of your favorite bayou bites.

Oh, man.

Well, here's the thing with the bayou.

Interesting.

The first thing that came up.

Sometimes the bites bite back, if you know what I mean.

Absolutely.

Sometimes the bites bite back.

Yeah, I actually did have a sandwich that bit me.

Oh, my God.

Was it a gate?

Was it a Gator sandwich?

No, it was just like,

it was haunted

yeah because ghosts are big down there and ghosts are huge down there yeah it was a haunted sandwich that i ate and it took a bite out of me we did go on a we did go we went on a ghost tour together that is we did did you really yeah yeah i i got there late our our flight my flight in was um was uh diverted oh no there was bad weather in new orleans and we got diverted to what's it called the other place that's close by New Orleans.

Baton Rouge.

Baton Rouge.

I believe.

Yeah.

Pussy ass plane.

And so I I came in.

Yeah.

It was a pussy ass plane.

It was a pussy ass plane.

The pilot was tough.

Oh, really?

The pilot had these huge balls.

And he came out to show everybody because he was like, everybody, this is a pussy ass plane.

I have huge balls.

It wasn't me.

And he came out and showed everybody his balls.

And we were like, yeah, man.

Yeah.

Yeah, it was really cool.

I would like to see that if that is the case.

But

it did delay.

You missed half the ghost story because of this.

Just got the end.

Got the scariest, nastiest ghost story that I don't even want to.

Which makes me want to touch it.

Where was the ghost story?

Were you walking around the town?

Was it a 10-to-1 hotel?

Okay.

Yeah, you walked around the town, which also, by the way, now that I think about it, oh, your plane was diverted and you missed half the ghost tour.

Interesting.

Yeah, that really is interesting.

Yeah, yeah.

It seems like maybe you were a little scared to come on the ghost tour.

No, no, no, no.

I wasn't scared.

I'm fine with ghosts.

I didn't go to the plane myself at all.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I swear.

I swear.

My plane was diverted.

Okay.

Yeah.

I'm totally fine with ghosts.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I believe you.

Yeah.

No, I'm, yeah, yeah, no, no, yeah, yeah.

I'm not scared at all.

What do you think of the term boo?

All right.

Okay.

Okay.

You diverted the plane.

I diverted the plane myself.

You guys.

But the pilot still had these huge balls.

It was amazing.

You guys, you guys are halfway there, and the guy, the guy who did the tour

was, it was very funny.

He was like,

He was like, All right, the tour's going to end at 10 p.m.

That's it.

He was, and he was, look, he was doing a great job.

He had a Ghostbuster shirt on.

I give this guy a lot of credit.

So, that's like selling it right away.

Ghostbuster shirt on.

You're like, okay, he got it.

This guy knows what he's doing.

Yeah.

And if worst case scenario, we're safe because

it seems like he knows some people.

He's in touch with the ghosts and pathways and stuff.

Yeah, yeah.

Supernatural.

So he had this, he had this Ghostbuster shirt on, but he was like, he was, and he was like very much like, I'm like, I'm going to be the leader of this tour.

And it was like at 10 p.m.

It ends.

And then when Beck and Kyle strolled along, I think he was an SNL fan.

Yeah.

And then he was like, the tour ends at 10, but if you want,

you can take those wristbands off and I can give you an extended tour.

Like he did that sort of thing.

Yeah,

he was kind of like, I could keep hanging out with you all night.

Yeah.

I could just kind of come along with you and tell you ghost stories if you guys want.

And we were like, we're good.

Thank you so much.

It was a really great tour.

He was a very nice guy.

Great guy.

He did a great.

He did a great guy.

But I guess the idea being that if he was hanging out with us and we had these wristbands on and he got caught, he could get in big trouble.

He gets $500 fine per person.

No way.

Is that for real?

Yeah.

Is that what he told us?

That's what he said beforehand.

Wait, explain.

I don't understand.

Wait, that's a good thing.

$500.

There's a thing that you're over 10 p.m.

Yeah, yeah.

That's what he was saying.

Yeah.

For tours?

Yeah, for tours.

Maybe he's a ghost.

Maybe the ghosts make that rule.

They don't want to be bothered after 10 p.m.

It is probably a ghost rule.

We did, we stopped at like a Matt.

Whatever her, it's an American horror story.

Kathy Bates plays her in American horror story.

Okay.

A horrible last story of this house where she tortured slaves that she owned.

But

Kathy Bates played her in American horror story.

And Nick Cage bought the house afterwards.

That's wild.

And he went bankrupt.

And he went bankrupt.

He did go bankrupt.

So that's kind of the ghost.

Yeah, they were saying that was the ghost.

He said that everybody who's owned the house has gone bankrupt, lost their mind.

Or

got killed.

Killed themselves.

Died.

Yeah.

Killed themselves.

Yeah, died.

Wow.

Yeah.

It's intense.

Yeah, it's pretty intense.

It was an intense story.

And you are not supposed to walk under the awning because if you do, you get cursed, basically.

Yeah.

A fucked up story, Wax.

But then we had some great bites right after that.

We did.

That was one of my favorite bite.

Verdie Mart.

Yeah.

Wait, what was it?

Verdi Mart.

Verdi Mart.

Verdi Mart.

Yeah.

It's Verdie Mart.

It's like this little, it's a little mart on the corner, a little store, a little quickie mart type thing.

They have like a full, a huge menu of sandwiches.

So your typical, like, you know, your little bags of chips and drinks and whatnot.

And then just at the red, a huge, huge menu, like a little deli.

Wow.

And I had a, like a fried chicken po-boy.

It was fantastic.

And I had a bite of the thing that you had the night before, which was called, what, the all-star or the...

I think it was called All That Jazz.

All That Jazz.

Yeah.

It makes more sense.

I had a bite of somebody's and I thought it was awful.

It was so, it was the sloppiest sandwich.

This is also a po-boy.

What was the form of it?

Yeah, but it's a po-boy.

It had everything on it.

It had like a bad thing.

Roast beef, ham, shrimp.

It has all, it has everything on it.

It was a slippery, saucy situation.

I like bit into it, and you know, things were kind of squirting around.

I don't like that.

Yeah, it was too much.

That sounds like ungopachka.

It's like a little too many terms.

Too many kabotas.

What's ungopacha?

Is that a term?

It's a Yiddish term meaning like one too many things.

It's gaudy, like over, overstuffed.

That sounds like that sandwich.

Yeah.

You know, a big part of a good sandwich is the air.

Have you heard this?

Yeah, sure.

You need some air in there.

You can't have it packed too tightly.

This is a sandwich person on Instagram.

I picked it up.

I love this.

And it's like,

you need to have some room for the, you need, we were talking about ratios.

Right.

It's all about the ratios.

If you have it stuffed with too much stuff, it's just, it's, I can't, my brain doesn't know what to focus on.

A meat stack.

We talk about the, like, when it was like, it's like something, you know, like, uh, we're meat obsessed culture-wise.

We're just obsessed with meat.

It's true.

And it's like, I don't love when a sandwich is like that much meat.

That's like, that's not a, that's not a sandwich.

It's the different components.

That's like a steak of cold cuts.

That's what.

Exactly.

We don't want that.

No, no.

We don't want that.

No.

No, yeah.

You know, you don't want, you need, you need that negative space, like you were saying, that ma.

A little air.

The ma.

Yeah, you need a little air in there.

Right.

I know.

What is it?

What is your favorite?

Because like I, when I, you said, when do you say po-boy?

I instantly just think of a shrimp po-boy.

That's like my favorite.

And I also, I feel like that feels to me very much like I'm down in Dubayou.

You know, like what are the contexts am I getting a shrimp sandwich?

A shrimp po-boy is is great to me that's the classic po-boy but i could be completely wrong i don't mean i've been to new orleans once in my life i'm just gonna tell you right off the bat you are completely wrong what is the classic po-boy the classic poboy i think is the uh the the roast beef roast beef okay the uh uh what is what do they call the the gravy the like the gritty gravy they have some sort of name for it um they have some sort of name for like it's like uh like a like trash you know like a like a trash

garbage pail or something

no no no Hold on.

Is it just calm?

Do they just call it calm?

No, they don't call it calm.

Give me all the jizz on there.

No, it's not jizz.

It might be jizz.

Hold on a second.

Is it the red gravy?

Is that where you're talking about?

Red gravy.

Oh, no.

What's the gravy?

All that jazz.

All that jazz.

Po-boy.

All that jazz is a little kind of, you know, spunky.

Yes.

To put all that jazz on there.

We jazzed it up.

No, thank you.

Put my jazz on there.

Debris gravy?

Debris.

Debris.

Debris.

Debris.

Debris gravy.

Well, I mean, I think it's just called debris.

It's called trash.

Yeah.

Debris.

Debris.

See, I would not think that.

Like, when somebody told me they had, somebody had like a roast beef po-boy, I was like, what?

That doesn't register to me.

I mean, I could be...

They pronounce it debris, not debris.

Debris, debris.

Debris.

Debris.

Debris.

Debris.

Yeah.

Debris.

Yeah.

But that's like,

I don't remember a lot of the other bites we had.

We went to like a couple.

We we went to a couple fancy we went to Ashafala, I think it's called.

That was on Saturday.

That was on Saturday.

That was really good.

That was a good, that was, those, those were some good bites.

Was that like a classic sort of, you know, Cajun sort of restaurant?

What kind of food were we dealing with?

Yeah, I think, I think an elevated Cajun something.

Got it.

I mean, I think Cajun food can be elevated.

I'm just saying

a fancier restaurant.

Yeah.

You had a fantastic looking gumbo.

I did have a very good gumbo.

You seemed jealous because I think that you were thinking about doing the gumbo and then you didn't do it.

I didn't.

I highly regretted it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But it's okay.

I'll go back.

I could sense that.

You were kind of shaking the whole day.

I was like,

my jar was sticking out.

I was like sticking my tongue out at you.

Doing stuff under the table you couldn't see.

But yeah.

Were you flipping me off under the table?

Yeah, a little bit.

So what?

It made me feel better.

It made me relax a little bit.

That's fucking bullshit.

I mean, try it out.

It feels great.

That's not under the table.

That's fucking right above the table.

What would you rather have?

What's the talk behind your one and go under your legs?

Yeah, that's better, honestly.

It's not right in my face.

What do you think we're doing back here, all that?

Oh, shit.

Yeah, you're looking up there.

You got to look down there.

Damn, dude.

I hate getting Casey.

Casey,

what?

What?

I hate getting flipped off.

It's one of my least favorite things.

Don't flip me off.

As a Boston guy, he can't handle that.

I got flipped off once at a Red Sox game.

I lost my mind.

Oh, no.

The opposing team span flipped me off.

Wise, you hate getting flipped off.

I hate getting flipped off.

Is that for real?

You hate the flip?

When I get flipped off, I flip out.

Turn down your podcast.

I guess it's too late.

Maybe we'll get a warning beforehand.

Is gumbo one of the most fun word foods, like food words to say?

Yeah.

Gumbo.

Right if there's jambalaya.

Jambalaya.

Oh, man.

Jambalaya is more fun than that.

You fool.

You've got Jambalaya over there.

Jambalaya.

Jambalaya.

Jambalaya.

Jambalaya.

Yeah, that's a hoot.

That's a hoot.

Yeah.

What about what is the other one?

What is it?

E-T?

Etuvet.

See, but that one I don't have any confidence in pronouncing.

So I get, so it's less fun for me.

Et touve?

Yeah.

What is that?

Et touffe.

I don't know.

I also don't really know what it is.

Sounds French.

Yeah.

I think it's gumbo.

I think it's a gumbo dish.

It's just made up of a bunch of bones.

It is a Cajun Creole dish from Louisiana that translates to smothered in French.

Got it.

It's mostly bones.

It was mostly bones, right?

It was just a pile of bones.

And you just suck the gravy off the bones.

Yeah, you suck the gravy off the bottom.

Get a little of the meat.

It's kind of like a stew.

It's debris on

the bones.

Low-key fun to say quesadilla.

I know it's not, we're not talking Cajun, but like quesadilla is pretty fun.

Cajun quesadilla.

Cajun quesadilla would be fun.

Cajun quesadilla just is

some

alliterativist to it.

Yes, right.

Yeah.

Would you say Cajun date?

Cajadilla?

Cajadia.

Cajadia.

What do you put in that, bad boy?

Shrimp and some spices?

That's pretty fucking fun.

I think you could have like a little bit of a,

you know, you could have even like a, I was thinking like a, like a

style biria taco you know what i mean like i don't like a little bit of a yeah that's fun as hell um that is huge that's this this is well speaking of huge yes

we got to talk about we got to talk some business here first of all yeah we're about to taco about some business well sure that's what we're talking about we're talking about personal business yeah personal business we've been talking about this well you you go ahead you go ahead i'll follow your lead um well no you i'll follow your lead no i was just gonna say we were talking about this doing this and we were getting very excited We have a whole plan of things to talk about.

Yeah, a whole plan.

Including the prayer at the beginning.

The prayer at the beginning was planned out just so you know.

I thought that was great.

It was the first attempt to go viral.

And we'll see how well it goes.

It's kind of up to the listeners and everything.

You know what I mean?

But yeah.

And if it does, then you got to pray every episode.

Second attempt to go viral is

we're going to pitch a movie quickly.

Yeah.

Beck Bennett, Mike Mitchell, and the Warner Brothers.

Yeah.

That's right.

The titular Warner Brothers.

We believe in the Warner Brothers.

Wow.

We have Hollywood Adventures.

We go around town having Hollywood adventures.

Maybe there's a crossover with the studio where we visit the studio.

Yeah, we're guests on the studio.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But we're the Warner Brothers.

We have fun Hollywood adventures.

It's a property.

Yeah.

What do you think of this?

We're really bad.

Our pitches are awful.

That's fun, though.

Even though it's Warner Brothers Studios,

we're like the Nepo.

So you're like

fail grandchildren.

Yeah, yeah.

We're still the Warner Brothers.

And we wear our grandpa's clothes, maybe.

Yes, that's what we're doing.

So we're like wearing old-timey holidays.

We live in the Warner Brothers Water Tower, like the Animaniacs.

It's making me think of Animaniacs.

And then when you say you live in the Water Tower, like the Animaniacs, I'm like, this is just a direct reference to the very popular.

We also have a sister as well,

Dot.

Her name is Dot.

Now I think this is getting too close to Animac.

Well, she's animated.

We're live action.

We're live action, but they will draw over us.

Yeah.

Do you think this hasn't been fully drawn over?

I would just say,

I feel like you probably could just streamline it a little bit and just simplify it a little bit.

Well, I mean, I think it was more like you guys are two dipshit, like, you know, again, Nepo kids in the Warner Brothers family.

You're the Warner Brothers.

Like, that I can track.

Right.

And it's a little bit more grounded than the version where, you know, again, you're living in the water cooler tower and with an animated sister and the animated warrior.

So

we're opening up.

Just keep it simple.

Yeah.

Just keep it simple.

Yeah.

Okay, great.

Then we'll just do the Warner Brothers thing.

Yeah.

Dot the Sister.

Is that her name?

Yeah, yeah.

Dot the Sisters.

Dot the Sister.

Okay, great.

And you're going to be named Wacko and Jacko, right?

Yeah.

Okay.

That's Michael Jackson references.

Yes, right, yeah.

I love that.

I think we would, I think a Warner Brothers property, Warner Brothers, you have your own property, the Warner Brothers.

Absolutely.

And they could just, and like, so we're going to guest on the studio, right?

And we're going to do a movie or something.

We're going to do a movie.

I think we're going to do a movie.

I think a movie is what it is.

Maybe even a series of movies, like old school, kind of like Chaplin or like Laurel and Hardy or Hardy, kind of like carry-on movies.

Yeah, yeah.

And we're gonna clean up Hollywood.

That's fine.

And bring it back.

Bring it back to what it was.

It was.

Wow.

Yeah, back in the day.

We wrote one scene where it was.

It's never good to make things like they used to be.

You know, you're always on the wrong side of history if you're like, let's make it like it was.

Right.

It's always a bad thing.

We have one scene where we get like a really big cartoony bomb and we explode Harvey Weinstein's jail cell.

We get him out.

We bring him back to Hollywood.

So Weinstein's back.

We're just bringing it back to the way it's going to be.

Bringing it back to the way it was.

Do you like this?

That makes you sound like just like bad guys.

Oh, makes you sound like villains.

No, well, but like lovable bad guys.

Like screw-up bad guys.

And we learn a little bit along the way.

Like your heart was in the right place.

Yeah.

You're like, we got to bring back this Oscar-winning producer.

Yeah.

And you just didn't really do your homework in terms of who you were.

And then we put him back in the jail cell.

And

his

cellmate, he looks over and it's it's like, it's a bomb, but it has like the uniform, you know, the jail uniform.

You know what I'm saying?

Like

it's like a trick.

So now he has to live with a bomb.

We're not going to write it exactly, but these are just pitches for like the show, the movie that we want to do.

But like, you can write it if you want.

Oh, sure.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'll write something.

And you could be in it too with us if you want.

I mean, yeah, I mean, if you want me to.

You can't be one of the brothers.

You can't be one of the brothers.

We could animate Dot over you.

Yeah, I was going to say, I could be the sister.

Okay.

We could.

We could animate Dot over you.

Uh, but yeah, we, I think, also, we like pit, you know, we pitch funny ideas and things like that, like a lot like this, like kind of like this, yeah, kind of like this, yeah.

Maybe it's about us like pitching the Warner Brothers idea to a bunch of studios, I guess.

Oh, yeah, we're just pitching ourselves to studios.

Maybe we're like the Warner Brothers and we're like stupid and we don't know what's going on, and like, and we get to have our own movie, something like something on

that.

That's fine, yeah.

Maybe we've we've got like, um, we got like a bag of gags or something like that, like physical gags, like old school

chickens and like spray bottles.

Sure, yeah, yeah.

You're saying like a live chicken?

Yeah, like live chickens and little animals.

Like, yeah, any sort of farm animals that we can bring into the room.

Yeah.

And those seltzer water.

Right.

Yeah.

The squirt and flower.

That's a fun.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I like the hot foot.

That's an old school gag you don't see anymore.

You're acting like a fucking exec right now.

You're not excited about this.

You're just picking apart the idea.

I'm not picking apart the idea.

I'm throwing.

I'm

collaborating with him.

He likes the idea.

I want to help shape it, though.

You know what I mean?

I want to be a part of this process.

You're acting like a freaking suit.

How dare you, Mitch?

Maybe it's the glasses.

I don't know.

Mitch, I would never be a suit.

That's the gravest insult.

That's worse than flipping me off.

I'm sorry.

Just calling me a suit.

Damn, you really, you went too far.

You know what?

That's better now.

We've made it better.

Yeah.

It's not as bad.

You're a creative.

Folk, we're all creatives we're all creative we are all creatives here yeah uh love to self-identify as a creative absolutely kind of guy i'm a creative i'm a creative i just uh yeah that's how i do i'm a creative content i'm a content producer i'm a content producer i'm a creative yes yeah these are things that i that's these are important to me right that's why we came to hollywood content creation create being a creative and to build the brand build building brands building brands and selling them i i have a question for you uh

which is uh I was going to change the subject.

We can keep going here.

No, I think that we've fully depleted.

We kind of ran out of our Warner Brothers.

Yeah, we kind of honestly, I think we ran out of the Warner Brothers stuff.

As soon as we said we were the Warner Brothers, we ran around pitching wacky ideas.

I think it was pretty good.

Well, hopefully an exec out there hears this and we can come in and meet with you and talk about the Warner Brothers.

And maybe

over Warner Brothers for a chance.

Yeah, maybe Warner Brothers wants to make that.

Which is

releasing a movie soon that Beck is maybe in.

I'm definitely in the Warner Brothers family, so this is

huge.

Wait, here's a here's a.

Since you're talking about brothers, Mitch, I know you don't have a brother.

In fact, do you have any brothers?

Wow.

Just

he's like that.

I was hoping it was going to end there.

Speaking of brothers, Mitch, you don't have any.

All right.

So moving on.

Mitch has a sister.

Your sister Courtney.

Courtney, yeah.

No, but that's no brother.

Not that's no brother.

I have no idea.

He has no idea what it's like to have a brother.

Right.

Yeah.

Amelia reminded me of the fact that the Gator was here here from uh from the new orleans uh we bought this on the gator tour wags uh uh beck was with me when i bought this yeah how funny i was right there in the gift shop this is the gator head that's on a stick for our audio listeners

mitch kind of ventroloque on the 500th episode yeah which maybe sucked does this i mean this episode might i mean our guest was great but i'm saying we sucked oh like on this episode 500 was okay 500 was okay Okay, we kind of suck on this episode.

We're sucking today.

We're doing pretty bad, but Beck's great.

I'm feeling good.

I'm feeling comfy.

We're doing bad.

This is supposed to be the viral episode.

Kiss the gator.

It'll be okay.

Fuck.

So you know.

Yeah.

Wow.

Got teeth.

Careful.

I know what I was going to say.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, so you guys are doing bad.

I'm doing good.

You're doing great.

But we're only like, how long is the episode?

We got 35 minutes on the clock right now.

Is this a question out of concern or are you...

concern for the episode or concern for like when the fuck do I get to get?

No, no, it's like it's just trying to find viral moments in it.

You know what I mean?

That's a great question.

Which maybe we'll talk about this, but maybe we'll like act something out later that we can put online and maybe be able to draw people.

Yeah, we can do some sort of.

I mean, I feel like our dais is more in tune with what goes viral, but it's fine.

We'll figure something out.

Yeah.

This is going to go viral.

You got any ideas over there?

No.

You know what Amelia was telling us while you're in the while you're in the shitter for 20 minutes?

Amelia was telling us that that

20 full minutes.

I just listened to two songs.

That

your routine, your skincare routine, you put beef tallow on your face every night.

I'm a French brother.

Really?

I'm a certified French.

Isn't that wild?

Did this start after RFK became the...

Yes, as a matter of fact, it did.

But

back to the brothers.

Yeah, I have two brothers.

You have two brothers.

An older brother and a younger brother.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

Wow.

Three years apart

to be to eat to be three years apart to be each of my brothers.

I have an older brother, Nate, my alpha older brother.

He's very cool and successful.

Oh, he's alpha.

What makes him alpha?

He's just not like me.

He's the fucking alpha.

I think you're alpha.

Especially with those glasses.

Yeah.

Really?

You know, sometimes you kind of just, you know, you're like, what's up?

It's me.

I'm here.

You know, sometimes, you know, you don't, you're not like, oh, are you okay?

Let me me help you.

Or like, oh, is that okay?

You're like, you're confident.

You're grounded.

Oh, yeah.

And I was reacting to you saying he's alpha.

He's not.

He's a very, he's, he's.

I'm thinking of myself this way.

He's like beta is the you've got some alpha energy, I think.

Okay.

Yeah, yeah.

You're not alpha.

So what and what does your brother do?

He works in tech.

He works in tech.

Does he work in the Bay Area?

No, he's his, he's down in San Diego.

Yeah, it's a city.

No, good guess.

I mean, like, that's where you should go.

Silicon Valley or Austin.

Those are the word tech is.

He's a content creator for X.

Wow.

Just a content creator for X.

That's great.

Congrats.

He works at Tennessee.

My older brother is a painter.

That's cool.

In Oakland.

Wow.

Yeah.

He just, he paints paintings.

That's fucking awesome.

Yeah, it's great.

He has a studio underneath his house.

It's like kind of like a tiered,

I don't need to describe the house, but he has a studio there.

And then my younger brother is a beer brewer.

Wow.

He's the head brewer at Cerebral Brewing in Denver.

That's amazing.

A creative family all over.

Oh, boy.

A bunch of creatives.

A bunch of creatives.

If I was a painter, you know what I'd do?

I'd paint like a portrait of myself and then let that get old and then I would not age.

Oh, that's smart.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Unless

hold, you'd let the painting get old so that you could stay young?

Yeah,

the painting gets older and then I'm eternally young.

And then I just keep the painting up in the attic.

Maybe later on someone will discover it.

And destroy it.

And if they destroy it, you might be in trouble.

Yeah, that could be a whole thing.

But for now, I'd be fine.

And I mean, another good thing is if you want to paint yourself to be young, you could just paint yourself, paint your face.

That's also

young, yeah.

Yeah, that'd be pretty good.

You might look slightly more insane if you do that.

But I don't know what's more insane, painting yourself young or painting a picture to keep yourself young.

I don't know which one would be considered more insane.

Here's the question I was going to ask you.

And this is a lot of people who are.

You would also, you'd have to see all your loved ones and friends pass.

Well, that's the curse of eternal life.

It's gonna see a tuck everlasting or the Highlander or what have you.

Of course.

In just a couple of years, I'll probably be gone.

What I think about with, give yourself more than a couple of years.

Five, six years.

What I think about is if you actually have eternal life, then you outlive, like, you would outlive all life on Earth, right?

You would outlive.

the like like time itself, right?

Ultimately, like the universe would collapse in and of itself, depending on the rules of immortality.

Are you going to be floating?

That's exactly what I thought you're going to be.

It's a consciousness that's floating, that's just adrift, that's just completely alone and isolated.

And then soon, the amount of time that you spend in that reality will be more than all the amount of time you actually spend on Earth.

Oh, my God.

Isn't that weird?

That sucks.

Yeah, I wouldn't want that.

You'd be a log floating in the universe's toilet, basically.

I guess so.

That's exactly what it is.

Just a giant.

It's a big old log floating around.

Yeah, I don't want to be alive forever.

No, me neither.

I would, I would honestly, you know, it's hard.

I, I do, I feel like I always think, like, I don't want to get that old.

Yeah.

Like, I don't want to be like living that old with a lot of complications.

But I don't know.

I can't.

It's, I can't, I feel it feels wrong to like really put it out there because then I might regret saying that, you know, right.

No, I don't want to, I just don't want to get up to the age of like, hey, Shonny.

I don't want to get to that age.

Like, like, hey, you just don't want to say, hey, Sonny.

I think you could avoid that.

I could probably avoid it.

Yeah.

You can be like, hey, hey, little guy.

Yeah.

Hey, guy.

Yeah.

Hey, guy.

How are you?

You're set.

I don't don't want to be like,

I just imagine like just like the runniest diarrhea all day long for some reason.

If you're a child, having a catheter in, just like really old, like, you know, just going to the bathroom all the time.

Yeah.

Like diapers and like not being able to hear anybody or see anything.

Sure, yeah.

Yeah, I don't want that.

No, that sounds.

I actually, I think the diarrhea part of it maybe wouldn't be the worst for me as a non-regular guy.

Yeah, yeah.

I think the fact that like being regular would be okay.

I think the not, I think the brain stuff is the thing that would scare me more.

So, yeah.

Yeah.

Do you know what I'm saying?

I don't want gray pubes.

I look down, I get a big, big nest of gray pubes.

That's why you don't want to get older.

Yeah.

That's why you might like off yourself before you get too old.

Once you start seeing gray pubes, you're just a single silver pube.

Yeah, I could not live with myself with that gray pubes.

Yeah, just dye them.

You can't.

I'm going to dye my pubes.

That's embarrassing.

Insane.

Gray-haired, pitch-black pubes.

You'd be showing everybody your pube.

Walking around with some low-cut trousers with the fluff hanging out on top.

You're like, hey, yeah, I'm Grab here, but check this out.

That's got to be legal, right?

100% legal.

Like low-cut front jeans.

I wonder at what point is it indecent exposure?

Like there's got to be some sort of legally defined threshold.

It probably depends on what state you're in.

I mean, maybe if you can see the top of the leg creases up here, you know?

Yeah.

Can you see, Like, can you see like a little bit of neck?

I'm going to call it right now.

Summer of pubes.

Let's get them out.

You think it's a summer of pubes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It felt like for a while people were like, just like, let's get rid of pubes and pubes were out entirely.

I feel like you have to be back.

You should come back.

I can't fully shave everything down there because it would, it looks.

You might accidentally shave off your dick.

Just one wrong move, the whole thing's gone.

Can I give you a plus side of silver pubes?

Please.

No werewolf is going to come and suck you off.

That is kind of nice.

wait, I'm sorry.

If he has silver pubes, white pubes, silver, you could call them silver.

Silver, silver pubes, silver pubes.

Well, silver pubes are different than white pubes.

Silver pubes are different.

Silver in there.

Because that's like, that's the idea of like, oh, if you have gray hair, then a werewolf can't get you.

But, like, but if he had silver implants, oh, okay.

Silver pube implants.

Silver, okay, that's fair.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I just figured silver pubes.

I know that werewolves don't like silver at all.

So I figured the silver pubes would keep them away.

Yeah.

No, like, not grays.

Not grays.

Greys wouldn't do it.

They'd have to be silver.

They had to be silver.

It has to be a nice in-between.

So you have a few years there where it's like a nice, you know what I mean?

You got a nice window there where you're not going to get silent.

I'm probably not going to get fucked up by a werewolf.

Here's what I want to ask about.

That's my biggest fear, honestly.

I don't understand that go for all this time.

You're going to get your question.

I was just going to say this.

It's not about, I mean, I will also say that a lot of Draculas.

Also, don't like silver either.

It depends on the...

Wait, really?

Yeah, silver certainly.

Somebody does go over between Draculas and werewolves, but this wasn't about that.

Okay.

This was about the bathroom.

And I got like some shit online for like, for bathroom breakdown and play the music in there.

Yeah.

And then they're like, that's just like attracting people to know that you're shitting.

But I don't, I think people don't understand how echoey that bathroom is.

And I would rather have music blaring in that bathroom than like hear like little fart sounds occasionally.

I think there's also an aspect of it's for you, not for other people.

It's all for for you you know what i mean yeah yeah yeah it does because it's like it's like well like i could maybe hear a tinny phone speaker um from the bathroom but like not like not really i'm not really paying attention what's going on yeah wouldn't you rather hear like 10 whatever instead of hearing like little like like like that's to me is like way more embarrassing i mean i mean for you but for me i would rather hear the little because it's funny it's funny yeah there's funny

and it's like no judgments yeah but that's like that is the truth i'm not laughing with you i'm getting laughed at right here yeah and then you tighten up and you can't let anything out that's the worst case that's the that is the worst case scenario unless i am doing a little and then you're laughing and i'm also like

that well like i know that my friend is laughing that's fun well yeah yeah but i don't i i'm too self-conscious doing that i feel like yeah yeah it's hard it's tough it's a slippery slope and then there are there are the people who are like not at all self-conscious about it which i'm sure is at some point it at some level is freeing like i'd like to be in that place where just like oh yeah i'll just like i can take a shit wherever i'm never gonna be worried about anyone listening in or you know having an opinion on on what I'm doing.

I'm kind of that guy.

Are you really?

I'm kind of okay with pooping anywhere.

Not that I'm like an, I mean, I'm a pretty solid pooper.

Yeah.

That's what I was going to say.

It seems like you have, seems like you're a regular guy.

Yeah, pretty nice logs.

Yeah, pretty smooth.

I can confirm it.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

And yeah,

I mean, I definitely did have that thing.

Can you explain how you can confirm?

Yeah.

Dude, I've known this guy for almost 20 years, okay?

Yeah, he's seen my logs.

We were battling sketch groups for a long time.

Birthday boys, good neighbor.

Yeah.

The war has finally ended.

War has finally ended in New Orleans.

Oh, that's nice.

Yeah, we finally finally called peace on it, but we've washed.

I've known Beck longer than I've known you, maybe, Nick, which is kind of crazy.

Yeah, that is wild.

Yeah, we go back.

Yeah, so we know each other's logs.

Yeah, sure.

But yeah, you see your friend's log.

If you know him long enough, you've seen a log or two.

Yeah, yeah.

Your best friends, you've seen their logs.

They leave one pictures.

What?

I get pictures my friend.

You're just

like, wow.

Wait, she was just explaining this the other day.

Scorpion, your father.

Yeah.

Okay, for our listeners.

You and your dad are texting pictures of each other's shit.

Yeah.

How often?

How often?

Like once, every so often, maybe like once in a blue moon, like once or twice.

So, like,

so are these, are these like, wow, what a good one?

Or is it like, wow, look at this.

It's like blood this time.

Oh, my god.

Is there any warning shot?

Like, hey, can I send you one?

No.

No, it's just like, boom, scorpion gets you.

So if you get an image from Scorp in the middle of like a meeting, you're like, I can't.

I can't.

It's dangerous.

It's either it's usually a picture of poop or his scalp to show that he's balding.

Wow.

Jesus Christ.

Can you put me on that chain?

I would love to be a part of that.

It seems like a guy would welcome any additions.

Be fine with any stranger hop on.

Yeah.

Now, if you've got silver pubes, but a bloody log, I don't know what that means for Dracula.

If he's going to come and get you or

if he's going to stay away, I can't.

I have no idea.

Well, he's going to come and then he's going to be repelled and he's going to be so frustrated.

Yeah.

Right.

Just give me the log.

Mixed message thing.

Just give me that freaking log.

We'll y'all get out of here.

A bloody log to Dracula is like it's like a Snickers bar to do a Dracula.

Mitch, that's disgusting.

Yeah.

I'm trying to hear it.

here.

Here's my guess.

Yeah, yeah.

You wanted that to be the viral moment?

I was trying to get some viral moment.

He's telling us that we're bombing.

I don't know.

You're doing great.

Fuck, dude.

He does not think you're doing great.

He does not.

I know.

He puts his glasses on.

He thinks he's above all of us.

I don't think that.

He thinks he's Clark Kenned over here.

Yeah.

Joanne, take him off.

I'll take him off.

No, no, no.

We like it.

We like it.

Looks pretty cute.

Ask him your question.

Here's my question.

You're the voice of, I believe the character is named Hank the Buffalo.

That is correct.

In the Buffalo Wild Wing spots.

Do you have any sort of inn where you get to try new Buffalo sauces and Buffalo Wild Wing sauces and rubs before they go out?

Can I answer for you?

No, you idiot.

Am I right?

That's true.

Yeah.

No, I don't get any preview.

I mean, I guess...

At the commercials, if there's an item that hasn't come out, I could try it.

But typically I'm like, oh, this is like prop food.

But there are people like making it sort of perfectly in the kitchen.

It's very edible.

But the character is like, you know, CG, right?

So you're on the second.

So the character is CG, right?

Do you think it's a real buffalo?

Well, I don't know.

You never know.

I mean, it looks real.

Yeah, it looks real.

It does look very real.

Use a real buffalo.

It does.

It looks very, very real.

It's real to me.

Or sometimes there's like a physical, you know, like a physical thing that's enhanced with CG.

I don't know.

There is a stand, and they have like a gray one, and then they have like a real hairy head, and then they have these, like, these, this ball that's a mirror and these other like things that they put in.

But I stand there, and I interact with the on-camera talent and I improvise with them.

Oh, so you are, you're there.

You are on the camera.

It's so much fun because I don't have to be on camera, but I still get to perform and do the character and like just kind of hang out most of the day.

I saw the first commercial, the first, the first one of those that aired, I texted you and I was like, you're the Buffalo Wild.

Like, I didn't know that you were going to be the Buffalo Wild Wing guy.

Kind of came out of nowhere.

Came out of nowhere.

There's no press release or anything.

It's just, I was just Hank.

You're Hank.

Yeah.

I love it.

It's one of the best characters I've ever played.

I'm one of my favorite, actually.

It's fun to play this Buffalo for two years now.

I think Hank

has immediately skyrocketed the top of the mascots.

I'm just saying, I feel like a lot of, I feel like mascot is a thing of the past.

And I like that Buffalo Wild Wings has a mascot.

I think it's fun.

Ronald, as we know, has basically been late to rest.

It's kind of Sunset, yeah, Sunset Ronald.

Yeah.

Oh, Ronald McDonald.

Yeah, they feature Grimace a little bit.

Yeah.

They're leaning away from Ronald for whatever reason.

The Wendy's, I mean, Wendy's doesn't have the Wendy's mascot in its current advertising at all.

In the like, the...

whatever you call it.

I mean,

they have Wendy in the logo,

but it's still part of the brand, but they don't have like, you know, for a while, they had different portrayals of Wendy herself in their ads.

They're not doing that right now.

Be dope.

Papa John obviously gone.

Jared Fogel's gone.

Yeah,

Jared Fogel's gone.

Cool.

Who's left?

The Burger King King was there for a while, but he's not around anymore.

No, Burger King King is gone.

I mean,

you got the Geico Gecko, but that's not food.

Yeah, it's not food.

Yeah.

That's insurance or something like that.

That pisses me off.

When I see him, I'm hungry and I'm like, what are you selling?

And it's insurance.

I want to eat that I want to eat that.

I want to fucking eat that.

Roast him up.

Which is with your character, it does quite, it's a buffalo that does have wings.

So the question is, is like, is he, is he, is he, is his kind getting, you know, is his kind getting like slaughtered and eaten?

I, I think he's more of a magical being.

Got it.

Like a magical, got it.

Got it.

He's more of a magical wing being.

Yeah.

Right.

Like he's one of a, he's one of a kind.

Yeah.

Like a griffin or a chimera or something like that,

mythological creature.

Yeah, absolutely.

100%.

That's fine.

Yeah.

So I'm Hank and that's freaking awesome.

Yeah.

Hank, Hank, Hank, Hank is, Hank is freaking awesome.

I love Hank.

Yeah.

You know what I like is that desert heat they got there.

Some of the dry rub because I'm a bit of a heat seeker and that one's like it's it's it's potent, but it's not the one where it's like at the absolute top, like they're wild or whatever, you know, which I can, I can handle.

But I, but also just as far as a sauce delivery mechanism, I like this, the dry rub over the sauces.

Wow.

Yeah.

That's, I, I can't do that.

I think it's better for dipping too.

Really?

Yeah.

You get the dry more dip.

Yeah, it's easier to dip in like a ranch or a blue cheese or what have you.

I was curious about, like, since we're talking chicken and, you know, you have this connection to B-dubs, which has a boneless and bone in.

And we got tendies we're talking about today as well as nugs.

What is everyone's favorite chicken form factor we're talking about?

Like, because

I'm a whole bird guy.

Like, I like bone in.

I like, like, you know, if I'm having wings, I like bone in over boneless.

But Mitch, I know you're a boneless guy.

I mean, not, look, yes.

No, no,

we're not talking exclusively.

Like, we're not saying like you have to be committed to this, but just like what's going on.

I feel like a great boneless buffalo baker or boneless buffalo wing like in New England.

Uh, I mean, look, I'm just saying New England because they make them good ones.

Look, everyone gets mad at me anytime I bring this up, and they got mad at me that I was like forcing you into saying the ones in Quincy were,

I was like, you get it now, and you did.

You said you got it.

You didn't force me to say that.

I had a good time going to that bar in Quincy with you.

Yeah, I had a great time with you.

He had a good time.

just you can like let that sink in he had a great time with you

i had a great time with him that's so sweet

you guys got to like appreciate those moments you guys are really special you know like what you guys have done over the last 10 years like you guys created a lot of wonderful things for the community out there and it's really special and you guys should really appreciate that

viral attempt number three

but did you mean any of that no

no i did i did i really did we had a lovely time we had a

No, no, I think

you get angry at

all these fans out there in the ether.

Like, just don't worry about it.

Don't anticipate the negative comments.

Because also, they'll zero in on something you weren't expecting, which is a lesson you and I have learned again and again.

That's true.

You think they're going to get mad at you for one thing and they get mad at you for a different thing that you weren't even thinking about.

You know what, though?

And you know, maybe they just want to get a little mad at you.

Like,

they want to stink up a little bit.

Yeah, sure.

It's fun to be a little stinker.

It's fun to be a little sinker.

You know what?

I still love you.

I still love all of you.

Wow.

Yeah.

that's really.

And then I flipped them off.

Yeah.

Little stinker.

I said this

before we recorded.

Tenders are long nuggets.

Yeah, tenders are just long nuggets.

That was another viral exam.

I do feel like there's a different composition.

Some nuggets are like a, you know, it's like a, it's like a...

It's not actual chicken.

Yeah, it's a super processed, like, you know,

blended in some way.

It's like a spongy type of thing.

Some nuggets are actual chicken meat.

This is fair as and I feel like some of the, so I've had some frozen nuggets that are like actual more like small tenders.

Yes.

But I think typically a nugget is a different category than a boneless wing or a tender.

Boneless wing is basically a small tender, in my understanding.

Do you have a preference of all the possibilities?

I think that right now I've been zeroing in on tenders.

Not boneless wings, not nuggets.

Yeah, sure.

However,

I used to think that I wanted the boneless wing because I just wanted to dunk it.

Right.

And it's more fried.

You know, it's got that fried crust.

You just pop that little, almost like a popcorn

chicken thing in your mouth.

And now I'm back to bone in.

Bone in wings.

I love bone in.

A good bone in wing, a bad bone-in wing will make me sad.

But a good bone-in wing, which there are, you know, you rustic, there's a few things.

I was thinking exactly what I was thinking.

You know, like sometimes you get a wing and it doesn't have that like fried crunch.

Sure.

You need a little fried crunch to really make it work.

But not necessarily, I don't necessarily need even breaded.

You know what I mean?

Like, yeah, not breaded.

But I do like having that crispness to it.

Those ones were

lightly fried, the ones in,

they had the nice crisp to them, and they still feel like a...

He calls tenders tendies.

The guy who you think is called Tendies sometimes.

The guy you think is an alpha.

Yeah.

Well, you know, I call him tendies too.

And I'm a 100% grade A alpha.

Wow.

No, I'm not alpha.

I'm not.

You're an alpha.

You think I'm alpha?

You're pretty alpha.

You're a sweetheart alpha.

Yeah, that's what we need more sweetheart alphas, too.

Yeah, I think I'm actually not an alpha underneath.

I don't know.

I actually don't know.

I'm learning more about myself every day.

I'm only 40.

Like, I might have a long, long life and have diarrhea and like silver pubes and stuff.

That's going to be awesome.

And I'm probably going to be learning a lot about myself then.

May we all live long enough to see the silver pubes.

I think that

may we all live long enough to see the silver pubes

and attract Dracula Dracula with our bloody poop.

Poops.

Like Amelia shares with her dad.

You share the bloody poops with your dad?

They're not all bloody.

Sometimes it'll just be

a little pebble, and then the comment is like, why bother wiping?

That is

revolting.

What's going on over there?

Nothing.

I was just checking in with you.

Should I even wipe after this one little turd?

I doubt there's even much.

I doubt there's any crap on my butthole, right, hon.

You're like,

don't wipe.

If I sent my mom a picture of a turd, I don't even know what that would, I don't even know what would happen.

I like, I think she would maybe be like, you need help.

Like, I think she would be like, you're in trouble.

She would think I was in trouble.

Yeah.

I would not, I wouldn't.

Or she maybe would just be nice and be like, that's a good one.

Like, you know, that's a possibility.

Yeah, maybe it would bring her back to the old days, you know, when you were like,

I remember that.

Yeah.

I remember that.

I used to.

They look just the same.

More silver than they used to be.

Send you back a huge turd.

Colin Rays.

Here's a, I got another question for you, which is regarding Superman, which is so cool that you're in it.

Where did you shoot Superman?

And

yeah, and, or should I?

I better not try to actually shoot Superman.

Yeah, yeah, I never shot Superman.

No, yes.

No,

where did you film the movie, Superman?

And then also,

was there any food in that area or areas you were able to take advantage of?

Great question.

Yes.

We shot in Macon, Georgia,

whatcha call it, Atlanta, Georgia, and Cleveland.

Wow.

That's where I shot.

They shot a bunch of other people.

How long were you down there for?

It was like a total of four weeks.

Initially,

I think it was like a week in Cleveland.

And then about two and a half weeks in Macon, and then maybe another week in Atlanta.

But in Macon, Georgia,

that was the most fun for me.

That's when I like started and that's when we did all the Daily Planet stuff.

And I was down there a week early for weather cover, which is like, I didn't really know what that was, but they were like on a big movie like this, they were shooting exteriors.

And they had me down there to shoot the Daily Planet stuff in case it rained and they couldn't shoot outside.

But there was a place, a soul food place, H ⁇ H,

I believe, in Macon, Georgia,

which was, it was was like the Almond Brothers either like co-owned it.

There's like a big Almond Brothers mural outside.

And I had it on my last day going,

like driving up to Atlanta.

And it was the best soul food I've ever had in my life.

Wow.

It was incredible.

I got a shirt.

I like went back in and got a shirt, which I've never worn because it's a big, very loud tie-dye shirt.

I've worn it a couple times.

I'm going to wear it a little bit.

But it was, it was incredible.

Like the macaroni and cheese and the like,

I don't even know what else I have, like tips of some kind, beef tips.

Okay.

Somebody's beef tips.

Yeah, steaks, dried, dried ends.

Burnt, burnt ends.

Burnt ends, yeah.

I don't even know if they were, it was in like some sort of gravy, I think.

But it was, it was incredible.

It was definitely the best soul food I've ever had.

You spent any time with the Claremont Lounge?

Speaking of grey pubes.

No.

No.

Speaking of grey pubes, I haven't.

The Claremont Mont Lounge is a

kind of a fun strip club that a lot of people go to in Atlanta.

In Atlanta.

Where there's like a lot of older dancers and stuff like that.

It's a blast.

I think

it's an appropriate strip.

It's not weird that I'm bringing up.

Kind of.

It is like a strip club, but it is, you know, but it is, but it is.

I gotta, I gotta get a call.

Are you really?

Do you have to answer it?

No.

Okay.

Okay.

You can take it if you want.

Dr.

Wolf is the name.

That's calling me.

Wait, really?

Yeah,

I mean, you can take it if you need to.

If you need to.

No, it's just put it on speaker and we'll hear everything that Dr.

Wolf has to say.

Again, there's no cure for micropenis.

Stop calling us.

I spent a lot of time in Atlanta.

I like it down there.

It's a fun.

Yeah.

It's a fun town.

It's a fun.

And then a week in Cleveland.

A lot of great food.

And a week in Cleveland.

Yeah.

And I had some great.

barbecue, actually.

I forget the name of the restaurant.

It was right by the hotel.

It was like a food network host who opened a restaurant down there.

And I I had, for the first time, a brisket.

It was like fatty brisket, not a typical,

and it was like, it just like melted in my mouth.

It was so

good.

I never want to have a regular brisket ever again.

Damn.

Yeah, it was fantastic.

MM factor.

And it melts in your mouth.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, sure.

Thank you.

We also need to talk about, we need to talk about, we need to address one thing.

Yeah, sure.

Yeah, of course.

Of course.

This is the first.

Beck is back.

Beck is back.

Of course.

I'm back.

I'm back here on Doughboys because I've been here once before, and now I'm back.

Yeah.

You haven't been back since that.

And I haven't been back since then.

And now I'm back.

And my name is Beck.

And Beck is back.

Beck is back.

Beck is back.

He hasn't been back since his first episode.

That's right.

No.

Yeah.

No, you're

no.

I didn't have anything to say.

You go.

There is a thing that happened.

Okay.

Yeah.

You were you, you were concerned.

That's right.

You, when we first had you on Doughboys, you said,

which was, we should say, 2016.

I didn't realize it had been that long.

I knew it had been previously, prior to the pandemic.

Yeah.

Nine years.

I thought it was like 2019.

I didn't realize this was back in the feral audio days before predated Emma Erdbrink's involvement with Doughboys.

That's right.

Wow.

I was going to say that.

Emma said nice to meet you when you came came here.

Yeah.

What the fuck are you talking about?

Yeah, it blew your mind.

I know.

And then I got scared that I did meet him before.

And I was like, I'm an asshole.

So I looked up the episode and I was not an asshole.

And you were not an asshole.

Even if, even if, even if you had met me before, it's perfect.

That's like a constant fear I live with all the time.

Yeah.

It's saying nice to meet you.

And I met the person.

But we got to do it.

I always just say, hey, good to see you.

And I don't, even if I don't know who the person is, that is my move.

Yeah, I shouldn't tell the world.

I've been doing the good to see you for a while.

Hey, good to see you.

They're like, hey, we've never met you.

I'm like, oh, well, nice to meet you.

It's still good to see you, even if we've never met.

Yeah, yeah.

Sometimes I run into the situation where like I am like genuinely excited to meet a person or it's like a friend of a friend or something.

And I'm like, it's so nice to meet you.

You know, like, but they're, they're saying nice to see you.

And then I say so nice to meet you.

And they're like, oh, and then they feel, you know what I mean?

And then they feel bad.

But it's like, so it's almost like that's why if you just say nice to see you, then everybody's safe.

Yeah.

Even if the other person says you know what I mean, like they feel called out if you say nice to meet you and they say nice to see you.

Nothing worse than a, hey, nice to meet you, followed by a, yeah, good to see you.

And it's like, oh, yeah,

we've, I fucked up.

Yeah.

And you're pissed off about it, I guess.

You know what I mean?

Like, uh, all of this, yeah, all of this meeting, uh, nice to see you, nice to meet you, garbage.

We need to let go.

Let's throw it out the fucking window.

It's gone.

It's like, you know,

all complete forgiveness on on the name front, whether you've met or not, it's just, we need to let go.

Isn't it just easy

to have like a thing like, hey there?

You know what I mean?

Like do something like a, like a, like a, some sort of saying that you're just like,

we don't have to have to, you know what I'm saying?

Rich, like, I'm, I'm not going to pat myself on the back here.

Hey, buddy has its utility.

Hey, buddy is such a great catch-all.

Hey, buddy.

No name involved.

No, no, like previous acknowledgement of having met before.

Just hey, buddy.

I think we should have these digital social cards.

So you can be like, hey, how's it going?

And bump them.

And you can always know who you met.

You get a download of their information.

Not like contact information, but their face, their name, and current pube color.

Yeah, current pube color.

Silver.

Exactly.

So

you really feel comfortable.

This is a black mirror, is the thing, though.

He's a black mirror.

I mean, he's kind of like Facebook.

Yeah, kind of.

He's kind of Facebook.

Which is a black mirror.

Yeah.

Really is.

But I do like, I think I would rather do that than have the.

It's just always when they're like, nice to, nice to see you.

And you're like, you're mad.

I never care.

Yeah, I don't care.

If someone forgets me, I never care.

But there are people who do care.

I do have the, I do will do the thing.

Even if I know, I'm confident I've met this person before, but I think there's a chance they don't remember me.

I will go up and be like, hey, I'm Nick.

You probably don't remember, but we met before, and I'll give the context for it.

And I feel like that's like a very much like, I'm giving you you the leeway to either be like, oh, yeah.

I mean, I know, even if you just end up lying there, I've given you an in for how to lie.

It's like, oh, yeah, of course, I remember.

You know what I mean?

So I don't know.

I just feel like it's a two-way street.

Help the other person out.

Understand they're in the same situation as you, you know?

But try to give them a good, because you're just trying to give a baseline for a positive interaction.

It's not going to be some fucking territorial pissing contest, you know?

Yeah.

To all you people out there who hold people to like, no, we've actually met before.

Yes, yeah.

Cut the shit.

You're gone.

Yeah, you're gone.

Cut the shit.

You're gone.

Get out of here.

You're canceled.

You're canceled.

We're canceling you.

Yeah.

Oh, the actors are canceling the public now.

Wow.

Wow.

How does that feel?

We're twisting it around on you.

It doesn't feel that good, does it?

Twisted metal over here.

Hell yeah.

We had a

promote each other's shows.

Wow.

That's the way it goes.

Raise each other up.

It's great.

I just want to say, what were we going to say?

Oh, I was going to say, since we're in this territory, I've had this thought, and I think we'll probably see it in some sort of uh you know uh near sci-fi uh what what's going on back for my hand that was a hard five

that is an alpha move though dude sorry

alpha yeah yeah

superman

you think that you've you hung around him so much that you uh right yeah we have the i fucking this fucking crazy ass was trying to have us do a Marvel meal today.

Anyway, I know that's messy.

It could have been funny.

It could have been funny.

Yeah.

Because we also, there is the Dairy Queen.

Like shit.

There is the Dairy Queen Superman thing.

Yeah.

Yeah, which, but it's like kind of a pain.

The closest one is in Santa Anita, which is like 45 minutes away.

It was a little bit of a pain in the ass for us to figure that out.

Which is very not Superman.

Very not Superman.

It's like, you know, Superman, like if we were like on theme with Superman, we would have found a way.

Right.

We would have made it happen.

Yeah.

But we were just kind of like, it's 45 minutes away, so we won't do Superman ice cream.

Yeah, that's okay.

This is Doughboys.

It's not Superman.

I do want to try it.

There's also the Fantastic Four Little Caesars Pizza that's out now, which is like MC, Mew, you know, adjacent or whatever.

But anyway, I was going to say is the stinky.

I can't even talk about that.

I'm not allowed to.

It's going to taste bad.

It tastes like garbage.

Here's what I was going to say.

I think in some near future sci-fi setting, we will see the concept of, or we will just eventually see it in our own reality and we'll never even have to have any sort of speculative fiction about it.

AR will be so omnipresent, augmented reality, where I will look at you.

It will show your name.

So I don't even have to remember your name or have learned your name previously.

And it will also show the last date that I interacted with you based off of facial recognition.

And I think that will reach a point where, in the same way, we no longer remember people's birthdays, we used to, like remember people's birthdays, remember people's phone numbers.

That was a time, this time in our lives when we committed phone numbers to our memory.

Now all that stuff is in the digital database.

I think the same thing will happen with names, where we just will not learn people's names.

We will rely on our augmented reality goggles to tell us of of people's names.

And if you go on to Netflix and you click on black mirror and you click the new episode, it says no need for new episode.

Just look around.

Whoa.

Oh, that's epic, dude.

That's another viral moment.

I think that might be my one.

I think that might be my one.

So what we landed on instead.

Hold on.

Wait, oh, wait, wait.

What we landed on instead.

Oh, wait.

Oh, we did.

So yes,

we were telling a story.

We were telling a story.

I also want to say your sketch group, Good Neighbor, used to be a good good restaurant near the Birthday Boys.

Absolutely.

A breakfast place.

Yeah.

Since closed, but

the restaurant closed?

So sad.

Yeah.

We thought that that's why you guys named the Good Neighbor back.

Yeah, a lot of people sad.

A lot of people did.

We named it.

It was in college.

I had a party, and afterwards, the next morning, the neighbor came over, this older woman, and she was very upset.

She had like some cigarette butts in her hand, and she was like,

These cigarette butts could have lit my dog on fire.

Oh, my God.

And the dog could have come in the house and lit my house on fire and killed me.

And she kind of just said that and looked at me and I was like, I am so sorry.

I swear I will, that was completely inappropriate.

I will never let that happen again.

I will put up a sign whenever there are people over.

And I will make sure that people are never flick another cigarette butt into your yard.

I apologize.

And she just went,

good neighbor,

good neighbor.

And she walked away and I never saw her again.

And then so they're like, maybe good neighbor.

That's great.

I mean, that's a great story.

That's it.

Yeah.

And also, it's really nice of you to not be like, wait, your dog is going to catch on fire and then catch my house on, like, calling out her insane

attachment.

Wait, that doesn't check out, lady.

I guess you did the right thing.

I did the right thing.

I was like, I'll just like move on.

Let's defuse the situation.

Yeah.

Smart.

And she disappeared.

Nobody ever saw her again.

But let me just say, them parties continue.

That's right.

What was the genesis of the name of the Birthday Boys?

Yeah.

We pitched 300 names in a Google Doc.

And then Birthday Boys is the one we all hated the least.

It's a great name.

Do you know who pitched it?

I don't know.

It was not me who pitched it.

My pitch was Beaver Fever.

Yeah.

Which is also, which is Giardia.

What is that?

It's Giardia.

Beaver fever.

Oh, is that is that what that means when it rhymes like that?

Well, no, it just, it's

when it rhymes like, no, giardia is, you know what Giardia is, right?

It's like a

bacterial infection, I think.

Yeah, yeah.

And so when you get it, you get it from water and they call it beaver fever.

Is that real?

Beaver is shit in the water.

And you're a parasite.

Remember, I got really, what did I get when I was when I went camping and I got water in my mouth and then I like I couldn't remember?

Like I was shitting my pants for like days.

It might have been beaver fever.

I think it was E.

coli.

E.

coli is probably even.

I think it's

really common in dogs too, especially if they come from like puppy mills.

Oh, okay.

And a lot of times they'll have Giardia when they're puppies.

Yeah.

I don't know.

I didn't know Giardia.

I feel very dumb for not knowing.

Yeah, you really should.

I know.

You really should feel so stupid.

I'm sorry.

It's all good.

But also, the beaver fever is also when you're like crazy about vagina.

I didn't want it to be dirty.

And that I was never going to win.

I mean,

this is the sliding doors of the sketch group having a show

IFC or not.

If it was Beaver Fever, we never would have, nothing would have happened.

We wouldn't have gotten a show.

Yeah.

And if we were side of guys,

if Doughboy was a good guy,

guys, which was

that was the other title we were going to go with.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Pretty solid.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Not bad.

By the way, now I'm just thinking about how I said vagina.

Vagina.

Vagina.

I thought it was very classy.

Really?

Yeah.

I can't stop thinking about it.

I'm almost sweating.

I'm almost flop sweating with how I said it.

I think it was fine.

I thought you said a fine.

I thought you said it very classy.

Vagina.

Vagina.

Vagina.

Vagina.

I'm going for viral moment number five.

Vagina.

Vagina.

If we just do a super clip.

Yeah.

Vagina.

Vagina.

I used to think there was a ver in there.

I thought it was virgina.

When I was a little kid.

Vagina.

I thought it was virgina.

Wherever you're from, New England, vagina.

Vagina.

Vagina.

Vagina's pretty good, too.

But wait, did you ever get to your story?

Yeah,

yeah.

We need to get back on track.

All right, we're back on track.

Okay, vagina.

Vagina.

Vagina.

She had an awesome vagina.

That's New England.

You came on the show.

That's right.

You said, I want to do Cheesecake Factory.

Didn't you work there?

No, no.

No, there's no connection.

You just liked it.

You loved it.

You loved it.

Yeah, I had been there once and I was like, I'm just excited to go back and like just to eat it and just to get a bunch of stuff.

And yeah.

And so we were like, oh, we were going to maybe do it with somebody else who God knows who we are.

I can't even remember who we had reserved Cheesecake Factory for.

Like, I think I got the yes, you can, we can do that.

And then it was like, oh, we, I think we told somebody out.

I think, yeah, I think we promised it.

We promised it to Chris Dalia.

In the early days, yeah, Dalia was going to do it.

In the early days of the podcast, though, that was before we realized like everyone wants to do the same restaurants.

That same year, we ended up doing, I think it was 2016, might have been 2017, Mitch, we did Rock Lobster Fest, which was a whole month of Red Lobster, partly because every other guest would be like, I want to do Red Lobster.

I was like, the only way we can get all these people in to do Red Lobster is when we do a whole month of just Red Lobster and get them all there.

Rock Doberfest, our first one.

Rock Lobster Fest, our second.

That's right.

That's amazing.

So,

you, I'll go ahead.

No, but I'm just saying, like, you can't you came in the early phase where I was like, wow, we promised whatever.

We promised Dalia Cheesecake Factory,

but I guess we can do it.

But yeah, we can do it with back.

We'll get them off for another year.

Perfect.

You guys should should still do that and bring them into Cheesecake Factory.

Yeah, we might.

I'm honestly, we might.

It might happen.

It might happen.

We might do McDonald's with it.

It might be our final episode.

But yeah, so I was like, no, you guys were like, is that okay?

Can you think of something else?

And I was like, I really want to do Cheesecake Factory.

Right.

And you guys were like, okay, cool.

And then we did Cheesecake Factory

and everything felt good.

And then a couple of years after that, I was like, oh, no.

Did I steamroll them on the Cheesecake Factory thing?

You thought that

you have never been back because of the Cheesecake Factory incident, as well.

Really, it's just because of the kind of guest I was.

No, no, I'm kidding.

I'm kidding.

No, no, no, I'm kidding.

We did that you said vagina weird on that first episode.

We didn't want to have you back.

Now I like to go on podcast and say vagina as much as possible.

As many ways as possible.

You thought that you had stepped on some toes and Weiger, I mean, we're friendly.

You could always bring that.

I think maybe you thought Weiger was pissed off.

Yeah, and maybe Weiger was pissed off.

Can't talk about it.

So like, here's the moment.

Are you pissed off at me?

I'm not pissed off at you.

Okay.

Oh, okay.

It sounds like you're pissed off at me.

People do think that of me, though, because I think because I am so cold and robotic.

Yeah.

And sometimes people are like, like, Weiger's like furious, or Weiger doesn't like me when it's just like, no, I'm just a

strange man.

This is like my default.

That's your wife speaking?

That's the alpha.

You think that's alpha?

That's almost alpha.

This is your family diversion.

Are you your mom and dad?

Like, Weiger's cold and robotic.

I don't think he likes me.

No, we had a great time, but I had a great time.

We should have had you back.

It's malpractice on our part that we did not have you back on the podcast.

Okay.

I honestly don't know why that is.

No, we are like, we're discussing this right now.

Can we just do like a little version of it where it's dramatic and maybe that's the viral moment?

Like it's acted.

Like you have to watch the podcast to figure this out.

Okay.

But it's a clip and it's like, okay, so yeah, no, I, I, when I came on, I said I wanted to do Cheesecake Factory and you guys were like, we have somebody else.

And I was like, I want to do it.

And we did it.

And then you guys were super weird about it.

And like, you guys, I swear that you guys were mad at me for steamrolling and pushing through the Cheesecake Factory.

Were you not?

The truth is,

our show sucks, and we didn't want to have you have to come back.

No, that's bullshit, dude.

Like, you guys iced me out for like 10 years.

We, and I haven't been back.

And, like, it's great to be back, but I think I feel like you're like acknowledging it, but you're not actually taking accountability for it because you did steamroll it.

You did steamroll it.

So, I did.

The only idea is we did get steamrolled.

And we wanted to do cheesecake factory.

No, what if you're fucking out of the back?

Fuck you.

Nick, how could you do this?

Fuck you guys.

We've been friends for almost 20 years, dude.

This is your fault.

My fault.

This is your fault.

Because you couldn't be honest with your friend.

Fuck you.

And don't you dare to be the one to fucking break the news to him.

Fuck you.

Because you were too much of a coward.

I'm fucking out of here.

Fuck you, Mitch.

You're fucking pussy.

Oh, shit.

Mitch.

Shit.

Oh, shit.

Shit.

Oh, shit.

We got caught.

Okay, so that's it.

That's good.

That was good.

That was good.

That was really good.

I didn't realize that we were in it because I was looking up something.

Can I borrow your glasses for a second?

Yeah, sure.

Do you want to take it again?

No, no, no.

Actually, we probably should do it again, but

this is another attempt at a viral situation.

Bark Kent.

Oh, nice.

That is great.

Jemmy does not like glasses.

She doesn't like, I am not, I'm hovering them near her face.

like, nah.

I'm hovering them near her face.

She doesn't like her.

Bark Kent is very funny.

I mean, crypto could be Bark Kent for sure.

It could, yeah.

Crypto the Super Doc.

Do you have one for me?

What?

You have one for me.

A funny thing for me.

Bark.

Bark.

Fart Kent.

Fart Kent.

Bark Kent's pretty good.

Yeah, it's really good.

Cunt?

Cunt?

Cunt Kent?

Oh, Clark Kunt.

Did you say cunt Kent?

Clark Kunt?

Jesus.

You think I'm a cunt?

I mean, you just looked like one.

I did look like one.

Yeah, shark Kent.

I don't know.

Yeah, put it on the gator and it's shark cent.

That's it, once you got it.

Good job.

Yeah, because it's actually a gator, but everybody thinks it's shark Kent when the glasses are on.

As an actor.

Really good disguise.

As actors, can we just do a second take of that?

The story.

Do you guys think you actually have time for it?

Yeah, sure, if you want.

Yeah, we do have time for it.

I'm going to act better on this one.

Okay, great.

Great.

So, like, I wanted to do Cheesecake Factory, and you guys were like, we have somebody else.

We promised it somebody else after you said I could do it.

And then I was like, I want to do it.

And then we did the episode.

And then, like, you guys totally ghosted me.

And then I never, like, I feel like you guys were pissed off.

Were you not?

i mean i well i look

it's in the past it doesn't matter anyways but so he did piss you off we're pissed off yeah we were pissed off why like i just wanted you told me that i could do cheesecake yeah we told you but i think if you read between the lines we clearly were like hey we have it reserved for someone else and you kind of like

foot down it's not a big deal it doesn't matter it is dude i came in as a guest and you guys just like fucking like were weird And you pretend weird.

You wanted to do the one restaurant and we couldn't do the, you wanted to do the one restaurant and we had something in mind.

Yeah.

And then there was another person that wanted to do the restaurant with me.

I'm so sorry I didn't do it right.

Fuck you guys.

I'm out of here.

Fuck this.

Beck, hold on a second.

Fuck you guys.

God damn it.

You're a fucking idiot.

Why the fuck would you tell him that?

What's wrong with you?

Well,

why wouldn't you tell him that?

You're his friend.

He's been my fucking friend for 20 years.

You couldn't.

You told him.

Fuck you, you fucking idiot.

You look like a fucking dip shit with those glasses.

Shut the fuck up.

What the fuck is your problem, Jemmy?

Sitting over there like you weren't half of this

Beck's been mad at you since the moment he walked in the fucking studio.

You're a disgrace.

You don't fuck you, Jemmy.

I'm out of here.

Fuck this shit.

All right, so now we're about

shit.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, shit.

We're fucking fucked up.

It was all rude.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, shit.

Oh, fuck.

Fuck, shit.

That was good.

That was good.

Jimmy, I almost got him.

He's a good boy.

It's a good girl, you fuck.

Get the fuck out of here.

Okay, so that's good.

Do we have three different takes of that now?

Yeah, I think we had a couple.

We've got a couple options.

Oh, let's do another one.

This was an interesting thing you were telling us.

Because we're talking Taco Bell.

That was great, by the way.

You nailed it.

You were talking Taco Bell.

So did you.

That was really cool.

Oh, my God.

Thank you so much.

You know what?

Nick is a great actor.

I'm not an actor.

But you are very.

I know that

you've substituted yourself out of the game.

You're no longer in the game.

Oh, I never really acted to begin with.

You were a good actor.

Well, maybe we'll get you back in.

Start with some smaller parts and we'll grow.

That'd be great.

Fall down too eventually.

Yeah.

Which was shot right down the street.

Falling down right down the street.

The store isn't there anymore, but the sort of like military

store.

The surplus store.

Yeah, he went in and get some stuff.

That was there not that even long ago, right?

A few years ago or something?

Yeah, yeah.

You were telling us, we're talking Taco Bell.

This is our technically technically our ninth canonical Taco Bell review.

Yeah.

That you've only been like a handful of times in your life.

You're not really a Taco Bell guy?

Not really a Taco Bell guy.

I never really registered in the suburbs of Chicago where I grew up.

It was like, it was all hot dogs and burgers.

I was a big, big burger guy.

Yeah.

Like still am.

We'll always take burger and fries over any other kind of fast food.

Hey, I'm with you.

Yeah, my man.

So you're south side of Chicago?

Northside.

Northside.

So not even Chicago, Chicagoland area.

Sure.

Surburg.

So I'll say Wilmat or Winneca and people will be like, you're not from Chicago.

Oh,

you know, whatever.

But it's like you saying you're from Boston, me saying I'm from L.A.

Sure, yeah.

You know, I'm from Lakewood, California.

But yet, like, no one knows what Lakewood, California is.

So say

LA or Long Beach or whatever.

People have a point of reference.

Yeah, Southside of Chicago has, I hear Leroy Brown is down there.

And I hear that he's pretty.

Have you heard of Bad, Bad Leroy Brown?

I mean, I've heard of him, but that's all I know.

But like that,

that's all I know.

And then my.

I'm the smadest man in the whole damn thing.

That's what I was going to say.

I heard that.

That was crazy.

My neighbor's dog, rest in peace, was named after Leroy Brown.

Really?

Her dog's name was Leroy Brownie.

Well, really cute.

Leroy Brown is meaner than a junkyard dog.

Exactly.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This dog was sweet.

I'm going to say this.

They say Leroy Brown is meaner than

old King Kong.

Yeah.

And I don't think King Kong is that mean.

I think King Kong is just misunderstood.

I was was going to say he's misunderstood.

But isn't that

the actors in the movie guys?

We know the mind characters, where they're coming from.

Isn't that the subtext of the song, though?

Because you think about a junkyard dog that's a caged animal.

That's an animal who, like, whose circumstances are what led him to be so aggressive.

The same thing with King Kong.

Like, you know, he's a gentle giant, but he's

misunderstood.

Same thing with Leroy Brown.

Bad bad Leroy Brown.

Maybe he just needs to let someone else.

Does Leroy Brown get beat up in that song at the end of it, doesn't he?

Like, isn't it like he gets his ass kicked?

Isn't that what happens?

I know that he, like, there's a girl named Doris, and

my grandma's name is Doris.

So, like, she always liked that part.

Was like, there was a girl named Doris, and who she looked good.

She would just get up and dance, wouldn't she?

She 100% would get up and dance.

And I'd be like, damn, grandma's looking good.

She's got the long moves.

She's so got it.

Damn.

That's a cool thing to grow up with.

It is.

When your grandma looks good like that, you don't know how lucky you got it as a little boy.

When your grandma's looking good.

You took it for granted your whole life, grandma.

Your whole life.

You're like, shit, grandma looked fucking good back when I was a little boy.

So here, so here's any confidence.

It looks like the context of the song that

in its narrative, Leroy Brown was messing around with the wife of a jealous man.

Jealous man, yeah.

And then Doris.

I mean, come on, any man.

I mean, you don't do that.

You don't do that.

No, you don't do that.

There's a code, a guy code.

Well, the two men took to fight in, and then when they pulled them from the floor, Leroy looked like a jigsaw puzzle with a couple of pieces going on.

So he got his ass kicked

because he cuckholded this guy.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Pode justice.

He kind of deserves it.

Kind of deserved it.

Which, luckily for our listeners, none of them, they, if they all want me to do that with their wives.

They're into hot wifing, but that's a different story.

You too, I'm sure.

What?

You would get, you would, you would get, they would want you to be with their wives.

Wow, that is awesome.

That's so cool.

They're very giving, too.

They're very nice giving.

Is that a thing that you've been offered?

We have some hot wife, some fans in the hot wifing community.

Yeah.

We're specifically interested in Mitch railing their wives.

Amazing, dude.

I can't believe I didn't know about this.

And so you're doing it.

That's great.

Congrats.

Very badly fucking some guy's wife this small dick.

You wanted to see this?

He's like, wow, he's doing so good.

What the fuck is this guy talking about?

So, this is our, like I always said, Taco Bell 9.

Taco Bell also had a Munch Madness month dedicated to it last year, Dokiero Taco Bell.

Did I already say tenders along nuggets?

I already said that.

You did say that.

Today we're talking crispy chicken tacos and burritos, which launched June 17th, which happens to be the day we're recording this episode.

So we're having these hot off the presses.

Amelia, you picked this order up.

You said that every man in the area was there.

Yes, that's correct.

Every man in West Lake was at this Taco Bell.

Wow.

That's very funny.

That also,

I bet you it's a similar crowd to the crowd that I see midnight movies at the Vista with.

I'm sure it is a very like 50-year-old, 40- to 50-year-old guys.

At the Vista theater, it is just like ghost of Christmas present or ghost of Christmas yet to come of like these guys who are there.

I'm like, that's just me or me in like five years, basically.

And that's probably similar guys in the drive-thru line.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Great.

So you know where you're going to be.

You You know, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

If you, if you go into Vista and you hear like a, like a deep cough,

that's what, that's one of, it's one of my, it's one of me.

It's, it's, it's, it's a, it's a guy like me.

They have the, so the crispy chicken nuggets they had recently, and this is kind of a yes and of that.

They're making long nuggets, 10 D's now, and then putting them in crispy chicken taco and burrito form factors.

They also have launched this with a full-blown cameo casting call, which this video they've been using.

Oh, fuck.

I didn't know about that.

Look, Taco Bell has added new items to the menu: Krispy chicken tacos and crispy chicken burrito.

The people of Taco Bell couldn't agree on a spokesperson to announce this product, and I guess they didn't want to just pick one spokesperson, so they got many.

Okay, with that being said, I'm excited to try their new crispy chicken burrito.

Also, comes as a taco.

June 17th, y'all.

Again, June 17th.

Let's see how they did.

The crispy chicken just hits different.

I don't know anyone.

I know you guys are.

All I knew was Gator and

Flennery from the office.

From Real Housewives, that's

Gorinda.

I did not expect Taco Bill to do Krispy Chicken, but they did it right.

Shout out, Taco Bill.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's what Mama Keeps the Cookies, my friend.

Oh, I like that.

That was where Mama Keeps the Cookies, my friend.

Who is that guy?

No idea.

Who is Gator?

There was a guy named Gator?

Gator.

Oh, okay.

All right.

Yeah.

Gator.

Gator.

Okay.

He is in the show, Dave.

He's a rapper.

Got it.

Got it.

And a hype man.

And

he was Dave's hype man in real life.

Oh, and opened for him a little bit.

And then he was on the show.

And he's very funny.

Well, he's a great performance hunt.

We'll hear an opinion from this Gator, too, before the episode ends on what he thought of the time.

He's X.

Probably a little jealous.

There's also a little bit jealous.

I think he went out for that role.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Also, celebrity chef Christian Petroni was in there.

Maybe that was the cookies guy.

I don't know.

Yeah, that looked like a chef.

Yeah, it looked like a chef.

Chefs Chefs have tattoos.

They sure do.

So, the you know, it's funny that we watched it again in our lifetimes.

We've gone that we've seen the chef switch from like the big fat guy with the beard to now like the cool guy with the sleeve tattoos.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Is it all Guy Fieri?

Is he kind of like the midpoint of the Santa Claus of that transition?

I think you have like the old Dom De Louise, the chef boy or D, you know, the big girls.

Yeah, then none of them were tattooed.

Yeah, no, no, no.

They were clean, old school, uh, yeah, more conservative looking.

Right.

I didn't even think about that I like it I like

have fun in that yeah why not have fun in that yeah yeah that's right absolutely okay so we got the crispy chicken taco the crispy chicken burrito the crispy chicken strips and they all come with either the spicy ranchero sauce or the avocado ranch sauce let me read the sauce descriptions and then we'll get into the taco and burrito or maybe we should start with the strips themselves The new spicy ranchero is a creamy sauce made with Anaheim and jalapeno chilies, tomatoes, garlic, and onion, offering a hint of spice that's perfect for dunking or drizzling.

And the avocado ranch sauce is a creamy and zesty ranch with a hint of avocado.

So that one's a little bit less.

I mean, that's got to be perfect for dunking and drizzling, too.

I mean, yes, these are also options.

Okay.

You can also dunk your drizzle.

Yeah, yeah.

But yeah, the spicy ranchero is certainly a little bit more, you know,

a little more complex and composed.

And the avocado ranch sauce is just like a ranch with avocado in it.

But they, so you basically want a spicy option, one mild option, one red, one green.

I will say,

I grab one of those chicken strips, and my expectations are like whatever.

I dip one of these into the ranch, Mitch.

Actually, the Hidden Valley Fire Ranch, which is a third sauce, which was available as a dipping sauce.

And I've had their nuggets, and their nuggets are good.

I thought the strip was good as hell.

I really liked it.

I enjoyed it too.

I thought the strip in isolation was quite good.

Those actors weren't lying to you.

Yeah.

The strips are pretty damn good.

The strips are pretty fucking good.

I was honestly impressed.

Yeah.

Big, nice crunch, nice color.

Nice crunch, which is just, you know, appealing.

You can't taste that color.

No.

You know, but it had a nice depth to it.

It wasn't like a pale, pale, light brown.

It was like a dark, deep, reddish-brown type of thing.

Great hue.

Yeah, great hue.

A great hue.

And also the...

Casey, is that some people who worked on your movie outside the window there?

It is, yes.

It looks like they're pointed out.

It looks like they're looking for their money.

You'll get angry, pissed off.

Ignore them.

I mean, like, to me, it was like

the strips, because we also got some nuggets side by side for comparison.

Yeah.

The strips were just strictly better than the nuggets.

Absolutely.

I just feel like the word ratio was tossed around earlier.

And yes, I just feel like there is more proportion of chicken meat, more protein per bite.

And

it was just,

you know, it just came together better and also was a better sauce delivery mechanism because I feel like the nuggets, you get like one good dip in there.

Maybe.

And you're getting your fingers too.

And then you're kind of like slip in and you drop it and you're like, oh, no, you got to get your fingers all in there.

It's a mess.

And then you're like, no, I guess I might as well just dip my fingers from here.

And then you're dipping your fingers and just, you know what I mean?

Yeah, it's embarrassed looking at you.

Yeah.

Yeah, we know how it goes.

We know how it goes.

I think that nuggets are best.

I think McNuggets are the best nuggets.

We can all agree that nuggets make nuggets out.

McNuggets are the best.

I'm not even really a nugget guy.

You said as you're a burger boy, you said at the beginning of before we started recording, which pissed me the hell off.

I'm the spoon man.

He's a burger boy.

Exactly.

I'm aligned over here.

Yeah.

Dude.

I mean, I like spoons too.

This guy likes burgers.

He likes spoons.

Whatever.

Dude.

You're going to fucking piss me off.

I would have went silent and I stepped in sometimes just joking around.

I got to be honest, I probably use spoons more often than I eat burgers.

If I'm being perfectly honest.

I probably use burgers

and spoons.

We're living in a topsy-turvy world.

Upside down.

You're more on my side.

It's fine.

I'm on your side.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

More on my side.

I don't care.

He doesn't care.

He's a free-year-old friend.

Yeah, we're friends.

We're friends then.

I like nuggets.

I like chicken nuggets.

I'm not trying to shit on nuggets, but the tenders just kicked the nuggets' ass so much.

They were so much better.

They were just so much better.

Did they have a, was there like a little bit

of spice in the breading, or was I getting all that from the sauce?

Because I was biting into those and I was like, did they have, like, Amelia's nodding along?

I kind of get what you're saying.

Do they have like a little bit to it?

A little ting.

Well, the hue, again, would tell you that there was a little something in the batter, but I never had them undipped.

Yeah, the color.

I like the way they looked.

I think the breading was like a touch darker than that.

I had a bite of them undipped.

And I do think that they were slightly spicy.

There was a spicy.

There might be some cold words on the counter still.

You want to go get them?

Actually, yes.

Thank you, Amelia.

Assuming the hunks didn't eat them already.

The hunks?

The hunks maybe did eat.

Well, you can never tell what the hunks are.

The hood gum hunks.

The hood gum hunks.

Yeah.

No, who's that?

Everybody who works here is a hunk.

Oh, nice.

Let's see if I can get any context from the Taco Bell app here as far as what is in the breading.

But in the copy, the press release, I didn't see any info there.

It's supposedly the same breading as the nugs, so uh, you know, I,

it shouldn't be anything new,

but okay, Amelia is Amelia's coming back.

There's a nugget in her mouth as she comes back.

Is that a nugget?

That looks like a tender?

Or is it tender, maybe?

Amelia, is it more fun when you when your log is like a nugget or a tender?

What is what's more fun to send Scorpion

or liquid

or liquid?

Is it great?

Don't say if you're sending a a pic of a bowl of diarrhea to your father, I don't want to know about it.

It's disgusting.

I was right about the reddish hue.

That is really red.

You guys served me correctly.

Yeah, you got a redness in there.

I might take a bite of.

I just took a bite of nugget.

Can I take a bite of tender?

Okay,

here's what the website says.

There is definitely some seasoning on the nugs.

Two premium all-white meat, white meat, crispy chicken strips marinated with bold Mexican spices and coated in a crunchy tortilla chip breading.

Okay.

A tortilla chip breading.

Yeah, which makes it a good thing.

Yeah, good crunch to them.

Yeah.

I taste the seasoning.

I taste it too.

Just a little bit.

No, you can finish.

You can give a little piece of jemmy if you want.

Yeah.

Okay,

whatever you want.

The strips were great.

The tendies were great.

Now we start putting them in tortillas.

And let me, I'll just read what's in the crispy chicken taco first and we can talk about this.

I mean, I ate one half.

I ate the other half.

She loves it.

Duck.

A harmonious combination of one perfectly crisped, crispy chicken strip layered with purple cabbage, crisp lettuce, pico de gallo, and shredded cheddar cheese.

And then you get your choice of either the aforementioned spicy ranchero sauce or the avocado ranch sauce.

I do think it works better with the spicy ranchero sauce, but again, I'm something of a heat seeker.

This, Beck, you had an observation here.

I mean, you could say it if you want, but as far as a point of comparison, because this is like an existing thing that we're going to do.

Point of reference for us as food eaters.

The taco, the tender taco, was it the tender or what do we call them strip taco?

Crispy chicken taco.

Crispy chicken taco is like a fried fish taco.

Yes.

So it's like, oh, I've had, I know what this is, but a fried tender in a burrito, I'm like, this is kind of a tender just like wrapped up with a tortilla and some other stuff in it.

It's different.

And here's the other issue, the other issue I had with the.

I said you, that's the best thing I've ever heard you say when you said that.

I think it's, yeah, and I agree with you.

I immediately knew it was the best thing I've ever said.

The first time I ever had a fish taco, which I don't think it was until maybe I was a legal adult when I had a battered fish taco.

It was you can get before you're an adult.

Yeah, you can.

But I just think that's when I actually tried it because I just thought it was weird.

And the first time I had it was a revelation.

It hit me with like a fucking lightning bolt.

I was like, I can't believe how fucking good this is.

And then I was just obsessed with them for years.

I was just eating them constantly.

Now it's a once-in-a-while, a while thing, but I used to love those.

Yeah, we're going to be able to do it.

Yeah, it's a completely different thing with a little coleslaw on the white sauce, and it's crispy, crunchy, it's light.

It's incredible so good you're a i i consider you nearly a california boy because you went to school down here even though you're you're really a chicago i'm really a chicago guy um but uh for me while i the fish taco i mean

in massachusetts like the idea of like

you could get like a fish taco i guess but it wasn't like a fish and chips of course is the thing i ate more but out here like the california fish taco and i think honestly i gotta give credit to wahoo's fish tacos because sure that was like one of the places i first ate a fish taco.

Yeah, Wahoo, a chain, a local chain that I think is,

boy, it's on the way, it's receding, and there used to be a lot more of them.

We reviewed it on Doughboys, and honestly, like, for it's, you know what, we did?

We did a Wahoo's episode.

I thought we did.

Maybe we didn't.

Do we ever do a Wahoo's episode?

I was looking it up now.

To me, you know what it reminds me of?

It reminds me of...

Is it Baja Fresh, the burrito place we used to like?

Yes, Baja Fresh used to, and they, I don't know if they still have a fish taco, but they had a fish taco that was quite good to me in the night.

We did it in 2018 with Eliza Skinner.

Oh, right.

Right.

I remember now.

Wahoo's Fish Tacos and Baja Fresh to me were on the similar plane of like quality, fast food.

Like, I was like, oh, they're like a little bit better.

And then

in like over the course of six years, maybe that both, I think, oh, Baja Fresh specifically.

Yeah, Baja Fresh.

Got bought by Wendy's.

Yeah.

Just, and I like Wendy's, but Columbus, Ohio.

They didn't know what to do with the Baja Fresh.

Yeah, they were a burger burger company, and they were like, I don't know.

Burger tacos?

Burger tacos?

And it was a premium brand.

It was more like a Paquito Moss.

And they were like, well, we want to make it more like Chipotle.

And this was obviously before Chipotle, but it's like they wanted to make it more of a value thing.

And

it didn't make any sense for them.

Yeah.

And the numbers weren't there.

Numbers weren't there.

The numbers weren't there.

Wait, but yes, this reminded me of a Baja Fish taco.

And yes, Wahoos did a lot for popularizing it, I feel like in California.

California but I think it actually owes its origins to Baja California to south of the border which would make sense um but they like i i it did definitely remind me of this it is the sort of thing like if they and i know i know taco bell's had versions of a fish taco in years past but if they had a fish taco i would be a little bit suspect about it just because it's i don't know taco bell doing fish i'm not sure if i would necessarily trust them with that but with a crispy chicken a chicken tendi i'm like okay yeah you know what they can execute this

The issue with the Krispy Chicken Burrito is the exact same components that are in the taco.

Yeah.

Can I just quickly say, please?

When Beck stormed out, can we just release that as a clip?

Like this, like Beck Bennett storms off pop.

Yeah, I think that was the idea.

That was the idea.

That was the whole thing.

You just had that.

Oh, shit.

Okay, okay.

Thank you.

I already wrote it down.

Okay, okay, okay, and maybe we release it before the episode comes out.

People, oh my god, what the fuck?

Yeah, and it's kind of like scary.

Like Jaws music or something.

Yeah, Jaws music during it is pretty good.

We can't use the Jaws theme, obviously.

Okay.

Oh, so we just kind of

add one note.

So dun dun dun, dun dun dun.

Okay, got it.

Yeah, you had a third note.

Yeah, yeah, we're just gonna go ahead and do all this legal.

I'm just gonna see you guys doing that right there.

Okay, perfect.

That works, too.

Okay, great.

Yeah, just perfect.

Sorry, sorry.

Yeah, so what were you saying?

It's the same components inside the burrito as are inside the taco.

Oh, I'm like, why does the burrito need to exist?

Yeah.

I'm like, make the burrito, put beans in the burrito or something.

You know, you just change it up, put some different components in there.

But if you're just going to put in the same purple cabbage, crisp lettuce, pico de gallo, cheddar cheese, and choice sauce, it's just a version that has, that's fully enclosed by a tortilla.

And so again, the ratio is off.

It's better with just the, the, the, you know, the, the flower corn tortilla or the flower taco tortilla.

Ah, the brazzles.

Yeah, yeah, you're getting.

And you know, I completely, I completely agree.

I'm getting excited because when we were sitting, because I have an idea, when we were sitting there, we were like, a burrito, it's more of a chopped set like a chopped situation You want it chopped and mixed up So my idea my edit for this would be chop up that tender into cubes have it more mixed in as opposed to a log right in the middle

100% cheese in there Yeah, like because if you have like a like a whatchamacallit like a

chicken Caesar wrap and you do a crispy chicken Caesar wrap.

That's like a tender chopped up.

Right.

Like, you know, like you don't want a single tendy just sitting in the middle of it.

You want it through the middle of it.

You want it dispersed dispersed and mixed in.

For sure.

Can I also say that the stuff that works on the taco, which is like this

cabbage and slaw, doesn't work as well, I think, in the burrito.

You got to change it up.

You got to cheese it up a little bit.

Like you said, Nick, beans are interesting.

Maybe some rice component or something.

Yeah, okay.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

You got to change it up a little bit.

More like fried potatoes.

I love that.

I love that.

Because I feel like that goes well with like chicken.

Some chicken and potatoes.

More textural variants.

Sure.

I think, honestly, potatoes, the chicken chopped up, cabbage, and more cheese.

And that's it.

You know, a little cheesy, crunchy, veggie, balanced carb, protein balance.

And it's perfect.

I love this right here.

But I did think the, like, I thought the strips themselves were quite good.

And I thought the taco was a lot of fun.

And I would get both of those again.

The burrito, I have no reason to get again when the taco exists.

Until they take our notes.

Right.

Speaking of things to not get again,

can I just say the kryptonite of the meal?

Sure.

Please.

A little Italian.

Nice.

Mike's, the Mike's Hot Honey Fire Sauce.

Yeah, they have some novel sauces right now.

Oh, Diablo Hot Honey.

That's thank you.

Yes.

Thank you, Emma.

Yeah.

The Mike's Diablo Hot Honey, which is available with the nuggets or with the strips.

Chemical.

Sucked.

Tastes like chemicals.

Tastes like science.

Yeah.

Sucked.

Yeah.

Bad, bad, bad.

No, there are chemicals in there.

We don't want to taste them.

No.

You don't want a chemical forward meal.

It's natural.

Yeah.

Natural.

Natural over a chemical.

Do you think that's what mutagen tastes like?

Nick, that is a great question.

I think it's probably close to what mutagen tastes like.

Definitely.

And I'm lucky.

And if I ate that, I was near Jemmy.

I would have been some sort of dog man.

Wow, I didn't even think about that.

Yeah.

Your DNA would have merged with Jemmy's.

Yeah, you'd become a dog man.

I'd become, yeah, I'd become like.

Akin to a werewolf.

Yeah.

But you'd have to be like, I'm a dog.

Oh, no, I'm not a werewolf.

I'm a dog man.

Dog man.

I know.

And I have to tell that to people all the time.

Like, relax.

I'm a dog man.

You know, like, not a werewolf.

Some guy with silver pubes is like, oh, this guy's not going to suck my dick.

And then you have to be like, oh, actually, I will.

I will.

Yeah.

No problem.

I'm just a dog man.

I can suck your dick.

Yeah, right.

That's another movie that we could pitch at the Warner Brothers.

We can pitch that at the Warner Brothers for shoes.

Oh, so it's like a dog werewolf.

So it's like a G-rated movie.

He's like, no, he's not going to be blocked.

He's still going to be blocked.

Because he's like domesticated.

He's like a really nice, cute guy, but people think he's scary, so they want to kill him, but he's just trying to suck you off.

And it's just like confusing and sad.

We're the Warner Brothers.

Trust us.

Hard R?

I mean, I think it would be much worse than a hard R.

He's sucking people off.

I think that goes above R.

It depends on what you're showing.

No.

I think you're a great point.

I don't know what you would have, if that was Mutagen, I don't know what you would have combined with.

I have no idea what was

over there.

I think there was like a fly buzzing around, so it probably became like a fly man.

Fly man is like, that's the

scariest one.

That's the worst one.

You don't want to be a fly.

You don't want to be a fly.

It's the worst one.

It's the worst one.

I think you're right.

It did taste like mutant, tastes like shit.

Very chemically.

Yeah.

I found it putrid.

And look, this is not just us going after hot honey.

I do think there's a, we're at a hot honey oversaturation point.

If I was

a huge piece of water.

I could drizzle it on a pizza, but I don't need it beyond that.

Can I just say, sorry.

Yeah.

If I was dogman and then you were fly guy, you'd be like following me around, waiting for me to shit all day.

It would be disgusting.

I would be.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's like

my favorite thing.

Your favorite food is becomes shit.

That's like dog shit.

You shit out a bloody stool and then compete over with a Dracula for it.

Wow.

He's trying to sink his fangs into it.

Just want to land on it.

Another Warner Brothers movie right there.

Honestly, the classic monsters with mutagen, like that, like Dracula, like a mute, like mutating Dracula.

Oh, you know what?

You know what I'm saying?

Like, they've never, nothing like that's ever been done.

Yeah, that's cool.

That is cool.

Yeah, yeah, thank you.

Yeah.

Anyway,

I thought that sauce was really gross.

And

the other sauce, the other sauces are, the new sauces are fun.

It's weird that they also have a spicy ranch in addition to the Hidden Valley Fire Ranch.

Confusing.

These things that coexist that are kind of like, and they also have the avocado verde salsa,

which also coexists with the avocado ranch sauce.

So they're all, it's all like a little bit,

the menu feels like it's a little cluttered.

It feels like they could simplify their sauce offerings a little bit.

Some of them seem a little bit redundant.

But yeah, the hot honey Diablo dip sauce is gross.

The Hidden Valley Fire Ranch dip sauce is quite good.

Very good.

Very good.

I was sad that we didn't get the honey mustard one because that looked pretty good too.

And then there's the bell sauce, which I've tried the bell sauce before, I believe.

I don't know how or why.

Maybe I tried the nuggets before.

I thought I didn't try them ever, but I maybe did.

I was hoping that would go on another minute.

I think I might have, but I didn't know if I did.

But I think the sauce in them, because I think I had the sauce, but I don't know when it was on.

But it wasn't from the show, right?

I think it was from the show.

Maybe it was from the show.

We also tried to get the Dragon Fruit Berry Aqua Refresca, which is also brand new, and the Dragonfruit Freeze.

Unfortunately, they gave us a Baja Blast Freeze.

Which Amelia swears she didn't fuck up.

I believe, Amelia, and also they were.

I was going to realize the colors are different, but I wasn't paying attention to the color.

I was going to say, too too busy fucking texting your dad some log.

Don't ask me the color of anything.

And also, they also have a brisk dragon paradise sparkling iced tea, which is, we think, we, we can't, we don't know for sure, but we think is what we got instead of the dragon fruit berry aqua refresca.

Cause you both are remarking that it tasted tea-like.

Yeah, had a little hint of tea.

It was good, though.

It was, I really liked it.

And to see the dragon fruit chunks at the top was a nice touch of class.

Really put, I, to me, like, took Taco Bell to another level.

Yeah, I liked it a lot.

Um, I also think that it was very low tea, there wasn't a lot of tea in there, uh, sure.

So, I, so which I liked, um, it had an and it wasn't too sweet, no, we said.

I like an iced tea iced tea, you know what I mean?

Like, I like to just taste iced tea.

I don't necessarily need some sort of sweetness, but I do think for what this was, I thought it was

much sweet, much sweeter.

Yeah, it's no, it's not, it's not overly sweet.

No,

All right, we should get to our fork scores here.

So,

Beck, just a reminder, we'll each go around, give a closing argument, if you will, on this version of Taco Bell, the crispy chicken menu, and then give it a score from zero to five forks.

You are a guest seated to my left.

We will begin with you.

Your thoughts, your fork score on Taco Bell.

Now, the whole them, the whole menu.

Everything I tasted at Close.

Yeah, I think, yeah.

Everything you tasted today.

Okay.

Not having been a, you know, I don't know Taco Bell that well, so I'm not putting in context of the other menu items.

You know,

I'm going to, my gut says

a four.

Wow.

You know, I know that's high.

So actually, I know.

No, no, don't be scared by his wow.

No, no, but I know that that's like high in the in the Doughboys world.

Like it's very honestly, like, I'm going to go back down to a three.

Oh, what the?

Oh, you don't have to do it.

What'd you do?

No, no, Tammy.

Like, I would do it three and a half, but you guys don't do halves, right?

No, we do halves.

We have halves.

We can do turns.

So I'm going to do three and a half.

This is why we haven't brought you back all these.

No, no, we do halves.

Do you do quarters?

I'm going to do three and a half because I love chicken tenders.

Yeah.

And this was chock full of really good chicken tenders, especially for this grade of restaurant.

So,

and I thought the...

It was just, yeah, it was fun to go to town on these tenders.

Yeah.

And I love the ranch sauce.

And I thought the dragon fruit was

kind of just out of otherworldly for a fast food restaurant.

So 3.5.

Three and a half forks.

Three forks two times.

Swags Wow scared you down from four forks.

Yeah, he scared me a little bit.

But you know, but he's but I'm getting the

falling down.

But that placed me into the context of the show.

10 years of fork ratings.

You know what I mean?

Like, like I, if you're doing it that often, you know, you got it, you got to, they come down a little bit, I would imagine.

We are professionals at this now, but hey, you're an actor.

We'll bleep that.

Well, yeah, of course.

We'll just bleep that.

We'll just bleep that.

We'll just bleep it.

We'll bleep that.

Yeah.

Can I ask you an actor?

You could put in.

Yeah.

Yeah, just put it.

Yeah.

Overdeadly character.

You're an actor.

Now,

there you go.

Yeah, you can't trust.

Let me go.

Let me go next because I do think I spooked you a little bit.

And I also...

Think giving having given your rating and having maybe read into my reaction here, you might be surprised at where I go.

Oh, because I really enjoyed this menu.

I'm a a big Taco Bell fan.

Mitch, you know, I will always have

love in my heart for Del Taco, which I grew up with and went to more frequently than Taco Bell, but I also went to Taco Bell all the time.

And I still love Taco Bell.

And I know that Taco Bell is executing in a higher level than Del Taco is as far as consistency goes these days.

All the new menu promotions they're trying.

are a lot of fun.

They're hit and miss, of course, because they're just taking so many shots.

But I think this one really hits.

I think this is, in fact, a direct hit.

I think think this is a really well-executed 10D.

And I think in the context of the taco, it makes perfect sense for Taco Bell.

And I think the new sauces are good.

The hot honey sucks, but the other ones are good.

And the sauces that are actually paired with the crispy chicken taco or the spicy ranchero sauce and the avocado ranch sauce both

are good.

And then also pair nicely with the additional sauces because I'm going to dump some fire sauce packets in one of those that you're always going to use to enhance your Taco Bell menu items.

So I honestly think

Taco Bell in general is a five-fork chain.

We did the whole, we did a Mitch, again,

we had the whole menu.

We did a whole Munch Madness Month just figuring out the best individual menu item.

And

I think this one would go pretty far if we re-delitigated that tournament and the Krispy Chicken Taco and the Krispy Chicken strips were

seeds in the bracket.

I'm going to give the Krispy Chicken Tacos and Burritos menu, our Taco Bell visit today, a canonical score of four and a half forks.

Wow.

So I'm going a little higher.

I love it, Wag, because I think that's a great score.

You scared me down for my four.

No, I mean, I'm just, if you want to, if you want to amend yours, you're going to be.

No, I want to, I want to say 3.5.

Because, you know, it's, I.

Oh, we can't scare you back up.

No, you can't scare me back up.

Well,

you know, I've tried my damnedest to make things go viral today.

Yeah.

And I feel like I didn't.

Ew.

Why is that wet?

Okay.

That's the moment.

That's it.

That's it right there.

Taste it.

I like dog piss.

Maybe that will.

I think there was just drool.

I think it was just

drool.

It was probably just drool.

It kind of tasted just like drool, not like dog piss.

Yeah, it was just, it definitely tastes like drool and not dog piss.

Fuck, I go to the bathroom again.

God damn it.

It's fine.

We get to get

through.

I'm going to get through.

Fuck, I got to go so bad.

Tell us your fork score, or you know what?

Go to the bathroom now and then come back with your fork.

I can't do this.

I can't do this pod anymore.

Can't do this pod anymore.

I can't do this pod anymore.

I got to go.

I'm going to do this.

Don't be staring longingly at the door, like, can I go?

Mind over matter.

Mind over matter.

Shh.

Okay.

Would you rather take a shit in the chair or on the toilet?

There are only two options right now.

All I know is that I'll be sending you a text of it when I'm done.

You can forward to Scorpion.

Loom me in.

Okay.

let's just go over the viral breakdown.

Beck Stowboy's band.

We talked about that.

The Good Neighbor, Birthday Boy Squash the Beef,

Warner Brothers, all that stuff we talked about.

Okay, okay.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay.

We took the boat by the Epstein Island and we saw Trump and Elon and Jared there.

We talked about that.

Yeah, we talked about that.

Okay, and we saw, okay, we saw

Tupac.

We met Tupac.

He's alive.

He's alive.

Okay.

Some of the stuff you didn't talk about, but we can just.

But this can't be.

Okay, sorry.

No, I think we hit all the viral points.

Oh, fuck.

I'm going to shit.

That's viral right there.

You go to the bathroom on this couch.

And we see some of it come out.

We're almost at a point where we would do our segment.

So if you, if Mitch, if you want to take a break, it's a perfect time for us to shut down for a second.

I love Taco Bell.

Okay.

I love Taco Bell.

It is, it's a five-fork restaurant to me.

Yeah.

I agree with you.

I think that this.

I think that this was a great.

Go to the bathroom.

You're stressing us all out.

I am like scared now.

Or you could go in your pants.

I think that this is,

I think that this is a great,

this is a great promotion for them.

Yeah.

I think that the burritos are kind of a strikeout.

I agree.

But I think the tenders themselves are delicious.

And I'm going to go four and a half forks as well.

Four and a half forks.

Okay, you guys scared me back up to four.

Wow.

Papa Bell remains in the golden plate club.

That was my go.

Yeah, that was my gut.

Wow.

There you go.

Where it belongs.

Yeah, there it is.

I'm going to be fine.

I just got to breathe.

I ate jalapenos yesterday.

Oh.

Are you having like just what is going on?

Do you have to take a shit or is it just an adjective?

But it's just going to be too long.

I don't want to spend a lot of time in there.

Let's just finish the okay.

All right.

We can finish the episode.

All right.

Hey, it's time for a segment.

I've got some food.

I'm really getting mad at me.

Something's not adding up here.

Why would it take you so long if it's about to come out of you right now?

All right.

The

diarrhea break.

Bathroom breakdown.

Wise.

I went to the bathroom.

Yeah.

I guess that's why you call it the blues from Elton John came on after I listened to that Ed Sheeran song.

Nice.

You got it.

Like, I guess that's why they call it the Browns.

I know.

Yeah.

I guess that's why they call it the

Blues Elton John.

And then before that, it was, remember the name from Ed Sheeran?

Fuck.

I just had it right.

Ed Sheeran and 50 Cent and M M.

That's what I played in there.

Wow.

Successful.

I had to move quick.

I didn't have time to wash my hands on the way back.

Oh, my God.

Please don't.

That'shed my.

Smelled fantastic.

I just want to say before I left, I was in distress and

I made up a couple stories.

I said that Beck and I drove by Epstein Island and saw Trump and Elon and Jared there.

And that was a lie.

And I said that we saw Tupac and Michael Jackson there alive.

That's a lie.

If you're going to go viral, you got to go viral on your own.

You can't make up stuff to go viral.

So I apologize to the viral gods.

It's big of you to do that.

Thank you.

Absolutely.

Hey, it's time for a seg, but I've got some food-related jingles, and Mitch and Beck must determine which year they came out.

It's another edition of Jingle All the Way, spelled W-H-Y-Y.

I'm so sorry.

Is this it?

Yeah, okay.

Wait.

The rules of Jingle All the Way, spelled W-H-E-Y.

The closest guess.

Guess what?

I'm pretty fucking good at this game, dude.

So you're gonna see.

You're gonna watch a video.

you're gonna watch a video with a jingle in it.

You're gonna watch a commercial and then guess which year this commercial originally aired.

All right.

The closest guess without going over wins a point.

If you guess the year exactly, you get two points.

That's the Arden Marine rule.

If the game ends in...

Arden Marine also reviewed the Cheesecake Factory with us.

Look at that.

During the pandemic.

How about that?

If the game ends in a tie.

He might have been the person we wanted to have on us.

If the game ends in a tie, the guest wins.

That's the Mitch Kenna rule.

If the second guesser can guess a movie from the first guesser's year correctly, they get a point.

That's the Murder Brian rule.

And you only can only do that once per game.

And if you can also make the movie guess a food pun that doesn't have to be explained, you get an extra point.

That's the Zach Cherry rule.

You can also do that once per game.

So let's just get into it and we'll get into it.

You can also add a rule if you want.

Or if you can come up with a new rule.

Wait, what was the last rule?

So when you guess the movie, if you can also make that movie guess a food pun that doesn't have to be explained, you get an extra point.

That was the Zachary.

That's the Zach Cherry.

Who's just on Kimmel?

Well, that's his old.

Sorry, it's dated.

Whatever.

If it's like.

It's like, so yeah,

if someone guesses Jaws and then you make a food pun off of like a Jaws line.

Lobster claws or whatever.

Yeah.

You've picked a hard one.

We're going to need a bigger sandwich.

Oh, sure.

Then you can get an extra.

It doesn't have to be the movie title specifically.

Yeah, it's just making a food pun.

And so also you can add a rule, too.

Also, we'd spend two hours, sorry.

So that's okay.

Is this, yeah, where are you at usually at this time?

We're about like a quarter way through the podcast.

Yeah, so we got

we're the home stretch.

Uh, today's theme is KFC jingles.

The first one is called Extra Crispy.

Emma, let's go ahead and play this:

extra crispy,

tender on the inside, crunchy on the outside, extra crispy.

Okay, Kentucky fried chicken, extra crispy, something different, something great.

Get a bucket of chicken, you're looking good.

Have a barrel of fun.

Extra crispy.

Extra crispy.

Something different from Kentucky fried chicken with a crispy, crunchy crust.

Have a big a lickin' good time.

Barrel of fun.

Okay.

Wow.

I got a number.

Beck has a guess.

You can go first and then we'll alternate.

I have a guess as well.

All right.

What year do you think that extra crispy ad originally aired?

1978.

1978.

You get to go.

So you get to go first.

So here's the thing is that I could guess 1979.

Right.

Billy Corgan's favorite.

Billy Corgan's favorite year.

Of course.

And

if it's over, I would win.

But I actually think it's 1977.

I actually really feel in my heart that it's 1977.

1978, 1977.

This is the dumbest guess I can make, by the way.

Really?

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's the worst guess you can make.

No one gets a point.

You both went over in 1974.

Wow.

74.

Way back in the day.

That I didn't know they had color back then.

Can I say movie?

Yeah.

Year before Jaws.

It's the year before Jaws.

I mean, you don't get a point for a year before Jaws.

We both don't get a point.

Thanks for nothing.

If you can guess a movie from 1974, you could get a point.

No, you have to guess the movie from the first guesser's guess, not the actual year of the thing.

Oh, is that what it is?

Yeah.

I think you have to guess the movie before we know the answer.

I wouldn't.

No.

I don't know.

I don't know if I moved from 1974.

I don't know when any movies are from.

1977.

There's a big one in 1977.

That's all I'll tell you.

74, I think it was Jaws.

74.

It's a year before Jaws, I believe.

I learned that recently.

In 1974, maybe French Connection?

Is that too?

I think that's too late.

It's a big one, huh?

Yeah, French, Try Connection.

You got a point.

E.T.

or something like that.

No, I don't know.

What is it?

A new Star Wars,

a new hope.

Well, you're talking about 1977, though.

But that was the one I guessed.

It was you have to guess out the person's year that they guessed.

Yeah, it's a second guesser has to guess and can say a movie about the first guesser's guessed year.

Okay, all right.

We know that's

it's clear now.

Wow, that's crystal clear.

It's a very confusing rule.

Box Office Top 10, 1974.

74.

Towering Inferno.

Okay.

A film that's totally been in memory hold.

That was a gigantic hit.

Blazing Saddles.

Wow.

Young Frankenstein.

Same year.

Blazing Saddles and Young Frankenstein.

Isn't that wild to think about?

No.

Earthquake, another back in that Towering Inferno era when disaster pics were so huge that ruled the box office.

The trial of Billy Jack, The Godfather Part 2, Airport 1975, again, another disaster movie.

1974 was Godfather 2, huh?

Yeah, Godfather Part 2.

Airport 1975, which like airplane is basically spoofing that movie and related movie.

The Longest Yard, the original.

The Death Wish, and The Life and Times of Grizzly Adams.

How about that?

I should know 1978 movies because you got 78, but we won't get into it.

Chinatown also came out in 1974.

Damn.

Small town.

Fuck, we're dumb.

So dumb, honestly.

All right, next up.

Towering Inferno.

I'm going to go right this time.

I'm sorry.

This ad is called Chicken Littles Come and Go With Me.

Chicken Little, stop coming.

So high fives.

He's clearly a 50 commercial.

Yep.

Joey, is that Joey?

It looks like Joey.

He is indeed

a young Matt LeBlanc.

Wow.

Do I get a point for that?

I should.

But no, because you can call him Joey, and his name's Matt LeBlanc.

We can add a rule if you want.

You can add a rule, but it would just give me a point.

So I don't know if that's the rule you want to add.

You can add a rule if you recognize for on some of the commercials, you get points, you know.

Right.

But you can make it so you have to say the celebrity's name, not a character they play.

Which means you would get a point.

It's pretty fucked up.

I think you have to say a character they play.

Oh, you want me to win?

Yeah, sure.

I'll give you a point.

Wow, okay.

Yeah.

So, let me write this down.

We have a Beck Bennett rule has been added.

Yes.

That's freaking awesome.

All right.

So, I'm going to make a confession here.

All right.

So, Mitch has one point.

I was conscious when this ad came out.

How do you know when it came out?

No.

I do not know.

But you remember seeing it.

I remember seeing this ad, and I also remember.

I mean, look,

Joey, Joey, aka Matt LeBlanc, is a big part of this guess here,

but I remember eating, I get to guess first.

Yeah, go ahead.

I'm going to say 1989, which could open you up to some movie guesses.

Which is 89.

1989 is my guess.

I think that this is a few years.

This is a young Matt LeBlanc, one of its first, oh man, maybe 1990 exactly.

1989, I'll stick with 89.

1989 is your guess.

Mac, what do you think?

Without going over.

Oh, God.

You could really.

I mean, I guess it'd be a smart guess to do 1990, but then we could both be over.

You said 89.

I'm going 88.

You could go 88.

You could go 1980 and catch the whole decade.

Yeah, I realize that.

Yeah, I'm going to go 1980.

You're going to go 1980, and you are going to get a point here because Chicken Little's Come and Go With Me came out in 1987.

Oh, two years before.

Okay.

So you each have a point apiece.

Next up,

this one's called Around the the World.

Around the World.

There's just one thing we do.

We make the Royal favorite chicken.

We make it especially for you.

Okay, so obviously a spot meant to be for an international audience.

Yeah, very inclusive.

That British accent did not feel real.

No.

I hope that was the only not real accent in the entire commercial because a lot of it is worrisome, I guess you could say.

Yeah, a little bit.

Anyway,

I had a good time and I enjoyed the commercial.

Yeah, I enjoyed it a lot.

Beck, you're guessing first this time.

What year do do you think Around the World came out?

I said the last commercial came out in 87.

That's correct.

I think this came out in 1983.

1983 is the guess.

If you guessed one year earlier, that would have been Polo ET.

But 1983, I should know movies from 83.

You just gave me a look like I should know.

Yeah, you should know.

A couple of them.

Is it like batteries not included or some bullshit?

Exactly.

I'm not going to give you a hint.

And you won't give me a hint.

All right.

1983.

I'm not going to guess a movie.

Yeah.

I'm sure that there's one later.

I'm going to say that this is a tricky one.

It's 1980.

Ooh, fuck.

I don't know.

You said 1983.

I'm going to go 1984.

Oh, wait.

You said it.

Yeah, 1984.

I'll go 1984.

1984.

Again, you both overshot it.

1982.

82, my birth year.

Yeah.

But I just said 82.

Yeah, that would have been awesome for you.

You would have gotten two points.

Sorry, buddy.

But you blew it.

Next up was this one.

Yeah, I fucking know, dude.

Still one point apiece.

We have next.

Cross the road, Jack.

Cross the road, Jack, to a place with a taste.

That's more, that's more, that's more.

That's more.

I think I was conscious.

I was conscious for this one, too.

This is one I very much remember.

This is one like I sang.

You sang the strongest.

You should

That kid kind of looks like the kid from Jerry Maguire.

Hmm, Jonathan Lipnicki?

I'm not sure if it is.

Can I quickly think I get a point?

Okay, I'll give you a point.

You're going to give him a point?

I mean, if it, because I don't have confirmation, so I have to go off of

you.

Jonathan Lipnicki wasn't born, you fucking fool.

Yeah, no,

I won't take that.

He wasn't born in 1990.

In 1990?

1990.

I'm going to guess 1990.

I'm going to guess 1990.

Mitch is guessing 1990.

Okay.

The year Lip Nicki was born.

I'm going to go

1990.

So, okay.

Wow.

I'm going to go 91.

And Beck, you're going to get a point because this came out actually all the way in 1997.

Wow.

I can believe that.

1997.

So it could have been Lip Nikki.

It could have been Lip Nicky because Jerry Maguire, I think, is out that same year or the year before.

Wow.

Maybe

is it Lip Nicki?

Then I get a point.

I don't know if it's Lip Nicky.

I give him the point.

I feel like you should give an extra point.

So Beck has three.

So Beck has three points.

Mitch has one point.

Wow.

Shot to the top of the chart.

So a couple more left.

A couple more left.

All right.

Two hours, 11 minutes.

This one's from KFC Australia.

This is called KFC Hot Cold Bag.

You buy Timpson Six in a pack.

You

Now the bag's worth $12, maybe more.

Ten pieces of chicken and chips make more, but you get the lot and you're doing fine for a crazy $15.99.

You buy ten pieces of chicken, that's fine.

Plus, chips for $15.99.

Can't wait for the steel from the Ducky Fried Chicken.

Can't wait.

That's what they call their dollars, Australia bucks.

Australians do love KFC.

They love KFC and he did a little chicken thing for the chicken.

Yeah, he did.

I thought that was really nice.

I do not know.

I don't recognize this actor.

I don't know.

This is Australia.

I don't remember who's guessing first.

Who guessed first last time?

Becca's going first this time.

KFC hot cold bag, what year?

Last one was 97.

What's it called back?

Australia.

It's the Australia.

I don't think of there being as any sort of Australian rap scene.

Like seeing Australians rap in like 1990 feels very

what the

clues.

Oh, yeah, I just said the year.

I'm sorry.

I'm gonna go 95.

Did you say the year?

Did you say it?

I really said it, but you guys didn't hear it.

I didn't hear it.

I did accidentally say the year aloud.

You fool.

Wow.

Well, I didn't hear it.

It's unbelievable.

We're the fools for not hearing it.

He gave us the answer.

Unless you really did hear it and I don't know.

I'm going to say the year 2000.

You both overshot the year that I said aloud, which was 1990.

Wow.

So no one gets a point.

Wait, what year did you say?

95.

95.

Fuck.

You gave us the answer.

95.

My brain is just mush lately.

I have a hard time associating movies with particular movies.

I know one from 1990.

Can I say that?

Yeah, sure.

You won't get a point, but you can say it.

Goodfellas, Dances with Wolves.

Were those both 1990s?

Dances with Wolves won the Oscar.

Goodfellas didn't win the Oscar.

Oh.

Was Last of the Mohicans?

No, not Last of the Mohicans.

We have one more.

One last one.

Now, this is a radio jingle only.

All right, this is at least

your chance to redeem yourself.

Okay, this is challenging.

This is one of three.

Just a radio jingle.

Yeah, it's anyone's game because Mitch, you can score more than one point here.

That's true.

I could score three points.

You could score, yes.

This one is called Perfect Companion Potato Wedges.

Oh.

Introducing KFC's new potato wedges.

They're the perfect companion to the Colonel's original recipe.

The perfect

This is it, that is a perfect companion.

Hey, y'all, this is Sam Endlicant reminding you to think about the companions in your life.

Whether it's that apple core that had you thinking, hell, one more time wouldn't hurt me.

You More than Viagra just took.

Oh, this is Fake.

Okay, so I see what's going on here.

I see.

I see the.

Is it Drop King?

Is this Drop King?

Hey guys, Drop King here.

Hope you enjoyed that very real and oddly Doughboy-specific jingle from KFC.

Was it actually created by Drop Maker Seagulls?

Who can say?

Cheers to you all, DK.

Can I guess a year?

Yeah.

2024.

So 2024 is a guess.

He's been sitting on.

I don't think think it has been 20.

I'm going to say 2025.

Beck is going to get it and win.

In fact, Beck gets an extra point.

Yeah, it was 2025.

It came out this year.

Yeah, someone created it that's for this segment.

Yeah.

Hold on a second.

Yeah.

I'm going to guess.

They were trying to make it sound like a specific year, if you want to try to guess.

I was going 70s for sure.

I'm going to say this, though.

Wages, I'm going to guess from his guess, 2025, Sinners.

And then I'm going to also say dinners.

So that's two points I just allotted for myself.

You did get two points.

So you lose by a margin of five to three.

Well done, back.

Thank you so much.

And you've added a rule.

How about that?

I mean, I absolutely crushed the game.

You sure did.

Killing the game.

My man.

It was a pleasure to play.

I get pressed, dude.

It was a pleasure to play.

What is the longest episode that you guys have ever done?

We've done a lot of episodes.

We've not even closed.

Okay, great.

Because I'm sitting here seeing the 216 being like, I did something wrong.

No, you didn't.

No, I know.

We're having fun.

I'm having a blast.

So maybe, maybe you know i'm sitting here going like oh no oh no

meanwhile it's like oh yeah oh yeah oh i think it's oh yeah

and it's like maybe that's like honestly i'm gonna look at my life differently and i came in here being like kind of an oh no half glass half empty kind of guy and now i kind of see it half full and i'm going oh yeah oh yeah you got you gotta you're more like a cooler full like the kool-aid man yeah this is awesome this changed my whole view on life we just have one question before you leave yep it's an email question just like a restaurant about your feedback feedback, let's open to the feedback.

Today's email is from Emily.

Emily writes, back in middle school, I had a friend who was a vegetarian since she was five.

One day we were talking about pizza, and she said that her favorite was pepperoni.

Of course, it was.

We had to break the news to her at age 13 that pepperoni is not, in fact, made from peppers, and her parents had been lying to her.

What's a food lie your parents told you as a kid so you just shut up and eat or a misconception you had about a food for embarrassing for an embarrassingly long time?

This is a great question.

thing.

I don't remember my parents lying to me like that.

Yeah, yeah, they never lied to me to make me eat meat.

Yeah,

my dad, my dad always told me that eating pineapple made your cum sweeter.

Okay, your dad told you that, yeah, my dad, my dad would always tell me that.

Got it.

Uh, but that's true.

That's a lie.

Yeah, yeah.

My sister once told these toddlers, her, her ex-boyfriend's kids, that she was trying to get to eat dinner that they wouldn't eat their broccoli.

And she told them that broccoli turned into cupcakes in their tummies.

And so then they would eat their broccoli like every time they made it because they thought it was going to be cupcakes after they ate it.

And it worked like a charm.

Well, that was funny.

That's very funny.

That's good.

Maybe I'll try that on my son.

My mom used to say to me, this is the thing I just remember.

If health is your wish, then eat more fish.

That's what she used to say.

A nice saying.

That's pretty good.

Very New England of her.

You know,

I think the,

this is a classic one, but so it's not that unique to me, but the carrots will help you see better.

Yeah.

I forgot to look at your eyes.

I've heard that one a lot.

Yeah, yeah, that's the only thing.

Tuna is brain food, was another one.

Tuna is brain food.

Yeah, if you do remember hearing that, oh,

yeah, I think I've heard that.

Tuna is brain food.

That feels along the same lines as if health is your wish, eat more fish.

My, my, you know, they always say, they always say to me, if you eat so much pizza, you're going to turn into a pizza.

Oh, I do remember that, yeah, which did scare me.

Yeah, and then I, and then I did have acne, like I did, I was greasy and had, so I guess it kind of came true.

Yeah, it came true.

It kind of came true true in the end.

Yeah.

I was told walnuts are good for your brain because they're the shape of a brain.

I've heard

that before.

That's a good lie.

That's a great lie.

Is it a lie?

Yes.

Okay.

Probably helps you think.

I mean, I guess maybe walnuts are good brain food.

I have no idea.

Yeah, who knows?

Sorry for so quickly shutting you down, Emma.

Yeah.

That's okay.

But that can't be real, right?

It can't.

Everything must feed your brain to some degree.

Great point.

Right?

Because

if you're malnutritioned,

that's a word, right?

If you're malnutritioned,

if you're malnutritioned, then you can't think straight.

Malnourished.

Malnourished.

That's what I was going for.

Walnuts offer a rare combination of chemicals that help boost brain function.

Oh, you're doing omega-3 fatty acids.

Oh, the omega-3 fatty acids.

I'm such a fucking dumbass.

I just came out, yelled, screamed at Emma.

Yeah, that was a

mistake.

What's the cum killer?

There's the one that you like, like the opposite of pineapple juice.

The one you would drink and say,

I thought it was like a yellow five dye.

Oh, yellow five die.

That was the big, that was a big.

So that might be in like a pineapple candy.

So artificial pineapple might kill your sperm, but then real pineapple will make it taste great.

And RFK Jr.

is trying to stop that stuff.

So it's like, it's actually awesome.

And like, I actually believe in everything that RFK Jr.

says.

And like a lot of people don't understand that he has like a lot of really good points about the food color dye and like trying to make our cum bigger bigger and stronger.

Yeah, exactly.

Viral moment number six.

Number six.

I think I'm on board with RFK Jr., but they got to watch the two hours and 20 minutes to find out that I don't.

Cook line and sinker.

Yeah, but I'm like, I'm just trying to remember a misconception me as a dumbass kid had.

What about if you eat watermelon seeds?

A watermelon would grow.

That's beautiful.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Remember hearing that one?

And they're also the

same thing with like you swallow gum, it takes seven years to digest, which I don't think.

I think there was one about tall, growing tall.

There was some food to grow tall.

Well, there's always talk about caffeine stunts your growth, but I don't know if that's that might actually be true.

I don't fucking know.

Yeah, I think commercials where they're like, I'm tiny now, and then I'd be like, but I'm drinking milk.

And I like, and then there was like an older actor.

Do you remember these commercials at all?

No, I don't.

You don't remember these?

These are like a very big milk campaign.

I don't remember that.

Thank you, Casey.

I remember my mom.

I mean, maybe this is true to some degree, but like that fried food would clog my arteries.

Yes.

Maybe that is true.

Is that true?

Like, I mean, but really?

like, if you eat it all day long, but you know what I mean?

Like, as a kid, I was like, oh, God, I had a lot of fried food.

I was like, are my arteries going to be clogged?

I had the same issue.

After my grandpa died of a heart attack, I did not touch fast food for a very long time.

I was very nervous about the burglars I had eaten.

I mean, I guess like she's trying to scare me.

So

good scare tactic.

Good scare tactic.

Yeah.

I guess it's true to some degree.

I remember one.

I don't remember where I heard it, but I heard it takes two days to digest a bagel.

Interesting.

I don't know if that's true.

Sounds like bullshit.

I don't think that that maybe is true.

I don't fucking know.

Yeah.

Your mom should go on scare tactics, scare people with that little factor.

She really should.

Yeah, yeah.

I think she'd be great at it.

It'd be like getting a little goblin costume, pop up behind people and be like, that's going to clog your eyebrows.

I'm actually remembering one now.

By the way, I'm realizing like most of the stupid shit I heard from adults was from Scout Masters and the Boy Scouts of America.

And

in Boy Scouts of America, there was a time when the Scout Masters were like, Don't drink water when you're hiking because then that'll make you more dehydrated.

Instead, you want to suck on a rock.

What the fuck?

So, like, kids would like, like, find a pebble and like suck on a pebble while they're walking through the water.

It was like

and then just like,

yeah, exactly.

And then just be dehydrated and then just like get sick.

Wow.

I remember like, I went, we went on this long

suck on a rock.

Yeah, exactly.

First step.

Yeah.

yeah.

Oh, man.

Until they get you.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So I do remember a lot of like just completely bullshit advice, like, you know, from that's the same place it would be like, oh, well, you go to the mountains, you're going to be closer to the sun, so you're more going to get sunburned.

It's like, no, what are we talking about?

That makes no, like, absolutely no difference,

you know, in an astronomical

masters are full of shit.

They're all fucking dumb.

They're all there.

The most valuable thing I learned in Boy Scouts, where I wasted so many weekends of my childhood, was that adults can be stupid.

And like learning that at a young age of like, oh, you're just, you're a kid's dad, but you're a fucking idiot.

Like, you just, like, you just came in a lady, and then now you have a kid in Boy Scouts, or you're a weird, childless man who's volunteering with the Boy Scouts for some non-suspicious reason.

Either of these category, but you're just fucking dumb.

Like you have, you have like a, like, like a double-digit IQ.

You don't know what the fuck you're doing.

And you're trying to provide guidance to children.

You're trying to say like, like, oh, this is what you should do.

But like, you don't know anything yourself.

You're fucking dumb.

I would love to see the guy you're talking about just cut to this guy like sucking on a bunch of rocks and like trying to start a fire and like just getting lost in the woods.

Just like you actually had a really dumb guy.

Really random dude.

But do they do they give you a badge for that for learning?

Yeah, for yeah.

For learning that adults are dipshits?

I did get, not for that specifically, but I did get the rifle and shotgun shooting merit badges.

And what, like, the context of that was just like we went out to the desert and like a guy, one of the scout masters just had a bunch of guns.

He's like, brought his guns and just like a 12-year-old, like, just shoot a 12-gauge shotgun.

Jesus, damn, yeah.

So, it's just like, we're all just like, I don't know what the fuck, yeah, okay, I'll shoot a handgun.

That's fun, you know.

Didn't you get a badge for sucking a stone until it dissolved?

Pretty good, pretty good.

A lot of fun.

That was a great question.

I want to say this.

Yeah.

Caroline and Vincy, my cat sitters

slash friends, gave me this little TGI Fridays unabridged dictionary of food and drink.

Love Caroline and Vincey.

Caroline Anderson, for people who listen to comedy Bang Bang,

a.k.a.

Scarabins.

Scaroline.

Scaroline.

Caroline, who always helps me over.

Vincy, my cat sitters and friends gave me this nice little

old school dictionary here from TGI Fridays.

We'll look through it at some point.

I can't wait to look through that.

take a little peek right now.

Wow.

Wow.

If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us at feedback at birdfuck.com or leave us a voicemail 830GoDo.

That's 830-463-6844.

Our producer is Emma Erbrink.

Our associate producer is Amelia Marino.

Our supervising video producer, Casey Donahue, our video editor, Mike Dorfman.

Doughboys Abarrel merchandise available in partnership with kinship goods at kinshipgoods.com slash Doughboys.

And the Do Boys Double Air weekly bonus episode is over at patreon.com slash Doughboys.

Beck Bennett, thank you so much for being here.

Thank you for having me.

Better blast.

You don't don't need the Doughboys to promote the Superman movie, but you are in Superman on July 7th.

July 11th.

We'll see movies in theater.

Tell you about it now.

No, it's the end.

No, yeah, no, but tell us about it.

It's amazing.

I've seen it.

It's incredible.

You will love it.

It's a great movie.

I'm so proud to be a part of it.

You're going to love it.

You said he shot one week in Cleveland.

Yeah.

Which is a great family guy spin-off.

But also, there is a moment in the trailer where they're like at that Cleveland hotel that I stayed at.

I stayed there too.

That's where we all stayed.

It was a cool hotel.

Yeah.

It was awesome.

But I lost my wedding ring at the gym.

That's

my last day.

That's a bummer.

And I called, filed police reports, did everything, called every pawn shop in the area.

In Cleveland, is there anything that can that maybe if our listeners can help?

Completely nondescript, just like gold wedding band.

Nothing.

Do you remember?

No, you should have, should have put my number on the inside.

Was the context like you took it off to work out?

And I put it in my wallet.

Put it in your wallet.

Or maybe, maybe I just put it in.

No, I'm pretty sure I put it in my wallet.

I always do.

Yeah.

And I put put it in my wallet and put it back in my pocket but i must have it must i maybe it popped out in the room or something i don't know

yeah that's a bummer but you know hey superman very cool that's cool very cool you know i you know you can replace a wedding ring you can't replace superman well said well very well said

my wife who stands behind that uh you also you have you have something i know you can't talk about i know we have to be cagey about it but you and kyle have something that people can look forward to this uh this fall right yes this fall me and kyle mooney longtime collaborators uh from good neighbor saturday night live

uh we have a little little something coming up

right where i'm like not allowed to talk about it um but because it's like there's a super powerful um company that's behind it and they're not letting me uh leak it out right so we got to just wait because we're going to give some somebody an exclusive yeah

um not us not you

we'll we'll no no no this is such a thing this is like this is a pre-exclusive, though.

We love.

This is a pre-exclusive.

This is not an exclusive.

This is a tease.

This is a tease of something that's coming.

This is a thing where we have to run now this tease by that super powerful company to make sure that we did not go like cross the line in far as far as probably saying something.

So

we do not want to get in turn.

We're having to be very cagey here, but it's very exciting.

Yes.

Thank you.

I'm very excited about it.

Yeah.

We're very excited about that and about Superman.

We can't wait to see it.

Go see movies, like Wag said.

And Wigs, I also want to just give a shout out.

The guy,

Matt,

Mary wrote in.

She said her name, Mary from West Virginia, wrote in that her husband Matt was on Jeopardy.

That's right.

He won.

He won like three days in a row.

And then I was at Red Lion after Playhouse Masterpieces.

And I saw him.

He sadly lost on Friday, but I saw him still.

Maybe our smartest listener, Matt.

I don't know if he listens to the show, actually.

But congrats to Matt for

three days running on Jeopardy.

That's awesome.

Really cool.

And I just would like to end this on a quick prayer, if that's okay with you.

Yeah, sure.

Absolutely.

Join in prayer.

Dear God, thank you for this podcast.

Thank you for all the viral moments that we had today.

And for my friend Beck and my friend Nick and for the Deus and Jemmy and Wally Nerman and everyone else.

Thank you, God.

I love you.

Thank you.

Amen.

Thank you.

I love you too, God.

Thank you, God.

Also, thank you to my master, Satan, the devil.

Nick, Nick, you

slipping that in there.

You old bells of both.

That'll do it for this episode of Doughboys.

Until next time for the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell, I'm Tiger Wagger.

Happy eating.

See ya.

Peace out.

That was a hit gun podcast.